The Toast - S5 Ep113: Toast True Crime: Wednesday, August 17th, 2022
Episode Date: August 17, 2022Brooklyn Beckham Roasted For Claiming His Career as ‘Social Media Chef’ Paid For His $1.2M Car (Page Six) (32:40) Taylor Swift Was Turned Down For a Part Twilight: New Moon Because It ...Would’ve Been ‘Too Distracting’ (Independent) (44:05) Julia Louis-Dreyfus’ Son Charlie Joins ‘Sex Lives of College Girls’ Cast (Page Six) (49:51) Tamra Judge Closes CUT Fitness After Nearly 10 Years in Business (People) (53:53) Secret Billionaire Makes $6M Offer to Save Central Park Boathouse after Reading The Post (NY Post) (57:10) - Dear Toasters Segment (DearToasters@gmail.com) (1:05:02) The Morning Toast with Jackie (@JackieOshry) and Claudia Oshry (@girlwithnojob) NLOG Tickets Merch The Morning Toast Patreon Girl With No Job by Claudia Oshry (Book)See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
Transcript
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Good morning, millennials.
Welcome back to the Morning Toast.
Happy Tuesday.
Hope, no.
Excuse.
Excuse.
Sorry.
You think the Streis brothers are here for nothing?
I'm so sorry because we did, you know, the Monday episode Sunday.
I'm awful clamped.
I'm all out of sorts.
Happy Wednesday, everyone.
Hope everyone's having an amazing hump day.
Don't forget to hump someone you love.
Even if it's a Streis brother.
Especially if it's a strice brother especially if it's a strice
brother especially you guys i hope we're coming through crystal clear today yes there was an audio
snafu yesterday but you know what it's not a mistake if you learn something a hundred percent
we learned plenty so let's talk about it and now we have a checklist we were early yesterday we
were like we had plans we're like we're gonna get in so
early we finished we felt good america bespucci grab my computer i get the audio off of our system
in a little micro card sd thank you memory card and i plug it into my computer and it's like
sounding a little weird because i'm not there and And I'm like, I probably wouldn't have even noticed if it was you.
But thank God it was me because I noticed.
And I'm like, wait, my mic.
Oh, Jackie being low again.
She's so shy.
She's so quiet.
Who cares?
But then I was like, me?
So I look down at our system and I see I'm mic number two.
You're mic number one.
I see mic number two wasn't on.
So I audibly gasp and I look at it and Jackie, you say what? And you look at what I'm looking at and then you go.
And that's really the end of the story. So here's the question. Were you silent or were you silenced?
I definitely wasn't silent. No, never. You know, the thing is for me, you don't even have to ask
that question because I'm never silent. If I'm'm silent it's because I've been silenced does that make sense yeah so we did
what we could to salvage the um audio from yesterday it was fine of course you know everyone
was upset but again I'm so flattered by like the influx of right you kind of like love when we have
issues because it just shows you like how many people need you and how many people
are listening because when things are good they're good here from less people people are enjoying
no news is good news but if you want news put out bad news 100 and boy did we get bad news yesterday
and of course like you know i hate when that happens like for a million reasons trust us no
one is more frustrated than us and if we could record an entire other episode again we would but like it would be fraudulent like we'd
be making the same america the speechy josh groban like how did we even work america into the
conversation i don't know he wouldn't have made it into take two yeah so like this is just we've
done it before where we've recorded like 20 minutes and we realized someone's microphone
wasn't on so we start over but you really just can't re-record the same whole episode like it's
just if we didn't have a backup audio and the first audio was unusable then we would have had
to re-record yeah but i think putting out like the take two watered down version would have been
worse than the take one murky audio no it's just like inauthentic and
we're extremely authentic like it's crazy you smell that it's our authenticity so it is what
it is we have a checklist now you like jackie said it's not a mistake if you learn something
and what we learned is like we need a routine a checklist of everything we need to make sure we
do when we're recording together and when we're recording separately so that video is taken care
of so that audio is taken care of, so that audio is taken care of.
And now we have two checklists.
They're pinned up on the wall.
They're quite beautiful.
And we ran through it today.
And so let's hope, let's pray.
Let's say, you know what?
All together.
Everyone close your eyes.
Let's just all collectively pray and hope and dream and wish that the audio on today's
episode is premium and crisp, that the video is so sharp you could see this pimple on my forehead,
that the smell-o-vision is so good you could smell my breath.
Amen.
You can smell Theo's infected foot.
It doesn't smell, does it?
No, but it looks like it does.
Yeah, no, for sure.
But they said his infection just kind of tinted the fur around his foot,
and it'll just grow out.
It's not going to go away.
It's just like the fur is useless.
We've got to get rid of it. Yeah's very pleany it's very pleany understood well
we're so glad to be here today and if you're looking for some more crystal clear audio we
dropped a patreon episode yesterday doing what is always everyone's favorite thing that we do
on patreon we do it every few months uh we did general q a where you can ask us any question
in the facebook group and we'll answer most of them.
We actually had some really good convos yesterday.
Yes.
And we got really good, like unique, interesting questions.
And I enjoyed it except for the part where you probably like said unintentionally like
the meanest thing you ever could have said to me and like really kind of dug in on my
insecurities.
I didn't know I was doing any of those things.
I thought I was giving you a compliment as you know, some of the worst insults always are a hundred percent. Cause I
would rather someone say something mean, like knowing that they were trying to be mean. It's
like, Oh, you were just trying to hurt my feelings as opposed to like, that's your truth. Right. And
it's my burden. And so if you want to know what we're talking about, unfortunately we can't tell
you. You just have to hear it for yourself at patreon.com slash morning toast. Yeah. Um, so
it's been a really fucking treacherous day for me because we had such a great evening,
you and I and Zach, all the boys on the couch.
Well, Harry was asleep.
We stayed up till late, like 1130.
Late for me, yeah.
And we watched Tim Dillon's new comedy special.
We were cackling.
It's always very scary to watch someone who you like on the internet in real life on like
stand up because you never know how it's going to translate to watch someone who you like on the internet in real life on like stand
up because you never know how it's going to translate it was wild honestly it's I've said
this before on the podcast but like the way that I like spend nights thinking about like maybe
something that could be misconstrued on the podcast versus what Tim Dillon was saying in
his comedy special on a on a real streaming service on Netflix I'm like what am I worried
about he used three slurs I was like shook yeah so also
it's not to make everything not to make Tim Dillon special about me but I was very relieved uh it was
so good it was really so funny I never seen this comedy before because when he played in New York
I was pretty pregnant so I couldn't go and I was so bummed and then when I saw he was recording a
special I was like wherever it is I'm gonna watch it. If it's on his Patreon, I'll get the Rothschild membership, like whatever it is.
But it was on Netflix and it's called Tim Dillon, A Real Hero.
And there were like some, we were bowled over.
The coal miner.
The coal miner moment.
I haven't laughed that hard in a very long time.
And the Little Caesars moment for me was really special.
It was really good.
I mean, if you're not into like even remotely offensive comedy, you're not going to like
it.
But it was fucking funny, like really funny.
Really fucking funny.
And it was the perfect length, I think.
And I think for you too.
48 minutes.
I thought it was the perfect length.
And I was just feeling good about the night.
You know, you and I made popcorn.
We did.
We put them in little containers that said popcorn.
We were so cute.
And like, you know, kind of like giving blogger like.
But that's what happens when you move to the suburbs.
Like you become.
You have all this space for crap.
You become like a mommy blogger suburban mom.
Who buys like cha-cheese.
That's what's happened to me.
Except I've had those popcorn things since like three apartments ago.
But now I can finally use them because I can see where they are.
100%.
And it was just a gorgeous evening.
Yeah.
Go to bed, 11.30, TikTok till 12.
Fall asleep, wake up.
Oh, I gotta pee.
I wonder what time it is.
Oh, I look over, it's two o'clock.
Go pee, get back in bed.
And I'm awake, like for the day.
Like there's no way.
I'm flipping and flipping.
At 3.30, I did eventually get on my phone and like every 30 minutes, I would like watch, go to bed, try and sleep. Watch there's no way. I'm flipping and flipping. At 3.30 I did eventually get on my phone.
And like every 30 minutes I would like watch.
Go to bed.
Try and sleep.
Watch.
Go and sleep.
By about 5 o'clock I had given in to the fact that I was awake for the day.
And honestly I just couldn't get over it.
Like it's so stupid.
But then my fate changed.
Because I was on TikTok.
And I saw this clip from an interview.
And I like didn't even know what the interview was about.
Or who this person was. But the girl looked vag vaguely familiar have I told you this this morning yet no I watched your story but I had no idea who you're talking about okay I'm about
to blow your mind can't wait so her name was Jordan Turpin and they were just telling this story like
this crazy story and I'm like you know let me go find this full Diane Sawyer because they were like
on TikTok watch five minutes part one and then I had to go watch a million other videos like let
me just find the whole thing on YouTube it was this hour-long Diane Sawyer because they were like on TikTok watch five minutes part one and then I had to go watch a million other videos I'm like let me just find the whole thing on YouTube
it was this hour-long Diane Sawyer interview sitting down with Jordan and Jennifer Turpin
and if you're like into like if you follow like it's not true crime but like if you just follow
like crazy shit that happens it's like a famous story and it's somewhat recent I had never heard
of it but this girl, she looked so familiar.
So the story is crazy. Jordan is the younger sister of the two. They're sisters. They're sisters. Okay. Oh no, they're not married. They're sisters. They're one of 12, 13 siblings.
And they lived in a house like condemned, like feces, hoarders, disgust in like two or three bedrooms filled with bunk beds
with all the kids ranging from like 10 to 30. All these kids who have literally never left their
house. And when they do, it's like four times in their lifetime where their parents like literally
force them to act normal. They were living in filth. They bathed they were never went to school they they had such
limited vocabulary their parents chain them up beat them abuse them like the worst fucking thing
you can think of and after a while Jordan gets access to a cell phone and eventually she's the
one who climbs out of a window in the middle of the night because they the parents tell them we're moving to Oklahoma tomorrow Jordan's like I'm never
none of us are going to survive they're so malnourished they're not going to survive a
trip to Oklahoma Jordan's like tonight's the night she jumps out of a window with the cell phone
runs down the block and calls a cop and of course they have all the uh 9-1-1 operator uh recordings
and you hear her and it sounds like a teenage runaway.
She's like, I ran away from home.
She doesn't know.
Like, she watched a little TV, and I'm going to get into that in a minute,
because that's the part I think you'll find interesting.
She couldn't even, she had such limited vocabulary.
So she has to wait 14 minutes for the cops.
They're living in California.
They did live in Texas for a little while.
The parents left them for three years in a trailer
and would literally drop off food for them. Like not even enough groceries. They would
ration it and they would make the older siblings, put the younger siblings in cages. And the older
sibling, Jennifer was like, that was the worst part because if I didn't do it, like they would
kill me. Like they were like, they would literally kill me. Where were the parents going when they
would leave? Come on, doing whatever they want. Party going to Vegas. And I feel sick. No,
totally. But they were also like really religious,
like Episcopalian.
It was so confusing.
Okay,
just wait.
Jordan runs out.
She gets to the corner.
She's on with the lady.
The lady's like 14 minutes.
I'm like,
oh my God,
14 minutes.
Like,
okay.
The cop pulls up
and we have the body cam footage
and they actually have the cop
on the Diane Sawyer thing
and then it gets reunited
with the girl.
It was really cute.
But he's like,
you know,
I took this call
because it was the end of my shift
and teenage runaways are always like, you just got to bring the kid back to the parents and a great,
it's a great way to end your shift. It's not like a high stress situation. And he's like,
that's what I'm thinking this whole time. And she sounded kind of weird. They have like accents.
They've literally never been a part of civilization. And she doesn't know like so many of
the words he was like, are you on she's like what's that he's like pills
she's like no sometimes we get robitussin like if we have a cough and then and then he was like um
are you injured she's like what's that he's like are you hurt she's like not right now no um and
thank god he like he was suspicious because it was weird thank god this random iphone she managed
to get she snapped a couple pics before she left like in
case anyone needed proof because one of these other sisters one time saw an episode of cops
and they needed proof that's how they knew what proof was like that's how they were learning
things so crazy she had a picture two of her younger sisters and that's why they really needed
to go out two of the younger sisters had been in chains for weeks only let out to go to the
bathroom even sometimes not even let out to go to the bathroom. Even sometimes not even let out to go to the bathroom. Then got you to this, took this picture. This cop saw the picture of these two malnourished kids
locked up in chains in this disgusting, filthy, filthy fucking house. And then he was like,
oh my God. So the whole ordeal from the time that she leaves to the time that the cops get there,
it's about two hours. She stays with the police officer but she keeps saying she's like if
my parents figure out that I left like we're fucked two hours later they go in for a wellness
check even though nobody called in on a wellness check like they have enough proof these two
fucking forlorn disgusting satanic fucks walk out of the house and are like what's going on
and they're like we got a wellness check uh You have kids in here? And they're like, yeah, you got to let us in. So, okay. So they go in and it's disgusting, but she says to
them, you know, we're moving tomorrow. So just don't mind the filth. And I guess being disgusting
isn't a crime. It is an unsafe environment for children, but so far they haven't seen the chains.
The chains is what they're looking for. But I guess when the parents were being weird outside,
they were telling the other kids, get rid of the chains, get rid of the chains, what they're looking for. But I guess when the parents were being weird outside, they were telling the other kids,
get rid of the chains, get rid of the chains,
get rid of the chains.
So they go into the two bedrooms
and there's really skinny kids in disgusting conditions.
But again, not like that thing they needed.
They needed the chains.
So they're talking to the dad, they're talking to the dad.
Then this cop realizes he's standing in front
of a bunch of moving boxes.
The moving boxes are covering another door.
In the door is another room for the other kids and there's one kid locked up in chains and then once it's all out there another one of the kids is like yeah all the chains are in the
closet they just made us throw them in there and that was like the thing they needed they were
they pled guilty within four days whatever the story gets even crazier okay
i'm sorry if you guys know the story and you're
familiar with it, but I got a lot of messages. Okay. So it gets crazier when she starts explaining
like the context of how she knew things, like what gave her Jordan is the one who ran and Jennifer
was like her accomplice. And Jennifer was the older one. Like Jennifer went to school for three
years. No, sorry. Until the third grade. Cause she's an older kid. Then they stopped sending
their kids to school and had a bunch of other kids. So she had like a small context of how life
was not supposed to be like this, but some of the kids were born into it, but she knew,
she knew it was bad. So Jennifer got this phone and she loves to sing. And she was like making
videos of her singing in the bathroom at night. And she would post them on like this, like a
social media account that she made and someone
was messaging her and was like why are you only ever singing in the bathroom and at night well
she's like oh that's how my life is blah blah blah and this guy random guy on the internet was like
that's not normal she didn't know that because she'd been like that her whole life she's like
wait what so then what really changed it all is when she found Justin Bieber and honestly when
she was talking about Justin Bieber I could cry and of course I googled of course she's like since
met Justin Justin brought her to a concert.
Because apparently the story galvanized the nation.
I never heard of it.
So she's-
When was this?
So she got out in 2018 and the interview,
they all, mostly all of the kids are anonymous,
except for the two sisters who finally showed their faces in 2022.
This interview was like very new.
Maybe it was 2016, 2020.
It was four years later.
So she's like, I used to watch these Justin Bieber music videos and I couldn't believe like
they're at the, it's just, you know, those young music videos. It's like they're at a bowling alley
and they're having so much fun. She's like, is that like a possibility? Like I want that life.
Like look like they're having so much fun. And so it was like these little seeds of things that
she used to see high school musical that would like when her parents were out, they had a TV, but of course the kids weren't allowed
to watch it.
But the parents would leave for like long amounts of time and they were able to like
get some context.
It's like, what the fuck is going on in the world?
And they never left because they were like, our parents like will actually like murder
us.
Like, and Jordan knew she's like, I, if I get caught, like I'm dead, but at least I
know I tried.
It was so fucking sad.
And so all of the things that
led her to the place where she was able to like come to the realization and then find the courage
to leave was from like pop culture in a way, because that was really the only things they
had access to, but like also really fucked up, like manipulative shit. Like they were bankrupt,
of course, because nobody was working. They were just beating their kids. And literally they used
to go drive themselves into debt, going to target or Walmart and getting tons of brand new kids toys for the mom. They were never open. No one was
allowed to use them. So the police walk in, they're like, Oh, all these kids toys. It looks
like Santa's, you know, workshop. No, they were never allowed to touch them. So fucking weird.
Wait, it gets so much worse. Okay. So the kids range, when they get saved, from about 10 to 30.
That means the kids who are under 18 have to reenter the foster care system.
Why can't their older siblings adopt them?
Because their older siblings are under a guardianship from the government
because they're not really fully formed adults.
They're stunted.
They would say there was 12
year olds in there who had the arms of four month olds, infants. Like that's how crazy malnourished
they were. So wait, it gets even more fucked up. So the kids who went to foster care, it,
they, ABC news was killing it. Like literally investigative calling everyone because the town
is covering it up. Council member, they're chasing council members through the lobby. I'm like, yeah,
get them. Everyone's covering it up. The kids who were in the foster care system,
there are two kids, at least, that we know of
who were in homes who were then raided for abuse.
So they went from one hell to another hell.
Can you believe that?
Then the older kids, you know,
it was a story that galvanized the nation.
They raised, just regular people go fund me,
things like that, 600 grand for them.
It was put in a trust by the
government this got one of the the older the oldest one 30 he's like i just wanted a bike like i have
a job like i want to get around no i couldn't get a bike like they have no access to their own money
they're living in squalor the person who's like the trustee of the account of course abc news got
their name vanessa hunting them down oh she no longer works for the government like so fucking
shady nothing has changed the kids are living like like nothing well obviously the kids in foster care are just going to a different sort
of hell and the ones who are older have no help this like task force was put together to help them
and the money and like guide them through life be like they were supposed to help them like use
public transit he would call Vanessa how do I figure it out crazy like it got so fucked up afterwards even more
but the thing that really struck me was Jennifer the older one who was in it the longest and like
it was just and she knew that it wasn't supposed to be that way because she lived
even when she was in school she was never getting showered like they were not taking care of her
but she got to go to school she said
Diane sorry was like what do you guys want to do now and here's what was crazy Jordan the one who
jumped out the window was like I love making TikToks I'm like that's how I know her because
for a while this blonde girl kept coming up on my TikToks and I was like reading the comments
because she was so frail and everyone in the comments is like you look so good
I'm so happy for you and I'm like wait what because she was literally like they said she had
the legs of like a six-year-old so I was like I remember being so confused and not looking into
it further and then they put up some of her tiktoks I'm like oh my god I've seen her dancing
then I had to go follow her this morning and then the older girl and it's really interesting how the
whole time well the two girls I don't know about all the other kids. The two girls were like, so,
um, like strong in their faith. Like they kept talking about God, even though their parents were
like crazy fucks who like had so many kids for God. And like, we're doing all this for God. Like
they still remained really steadfast in their faith, which I thought was really interesting.
And then the older girl, Diane was like,
what do you want to do?
She's like, I want to be a Christian pop star.
And Diane was like, who do you love?
Like, she was like, I love Kelly Clarkson.
Wait, and she was like, what's your favorite Kelly?
I'm like, literally gonna cry.
She was like, what's your favorite Kelly Clarkson song?
And she was like, Broken and Beautiful.
That new one.
She was like, that's me.
From Trolls.
She was like, that's me.
I'm broken, but it's beautiful.
It was, I feel like I was meant to wake up so early so I could watch.
I'm, I can't believe I didn't know about this.
So I'm sorry if you knew that already.
I spent literally 16 minutes.
Jackie, it was the craziest.
I need to watch more documentaries.
Like, I need to know more.
And like, going to the sentencing, the two older kids spoke.
And then some of the kids wrote letters that the older kids spoke.
And like, some of them were like, forgiving.
I'm like, okay, you could never be me forgiving like we see you some other kids
were like fuck you like this is my life now and the two parents got 25 to life right they're in
separate prisons um the dad was like oh i have a statement but my lawyer has to read it like
shut up okay it's not about you and then the mom read a statement she's like i'm sorry that i hurt
my kids like i just i'm not buying it you know he's not gonna cut it sorry and that's really
what they said they were like you know we watched her her crying on with the speech and you know
we believed her she's our mom and they were like we don't even like to call her mom but we will for
the sake of this interview but they used to make us call them mother and father but like i call her tracy or whatever the fuck her name was um they were like
we watched this apology me like believed her but then it's like we remembered she's so fucking
manipulative like you have to remember that they're like we have no interest in like ever
communicating with her for now like maybe that'll change but like for now it's gonna be a no
it was the craziest journey I went on this morning.
That makes me so sick.
Jackie was fucking sick.
Especially the part where it's still not good for them.
And the kids in the foster care system.
And that's what the person on the expert was saying. This is a system that was literally created for the sole purpose of helping people.
Helping kids.
Helping kids.
And it's literally-
The most twisted.
It's the most like fucked up.
And so I loved that ABC was like dragging everyone,
like the companies, the people,
they're calling out employees by name.
I'm like, yeah, Vanessa.
They were just, honestly, they were doing great reporting.
Diane Sawyer, she kills it.
But it's crazy how like one, everyone in general,
in theory, like we're here, we need to help the children.
Right. These kids are in trouble. There's a task force dedicated to helping these kids the whole world is paying attention and it's
still they're not helping the kids no it's so disgusting the government is literal trash and
also like the girl who went to school until third grade like showing up not showered like
the teachers are supposed to okay so that's what they said they said now they all went back to like her school
records was there any reporting of with apparently if the two telltale signs of abuse are like if a
kid shows up really thin and like malnourished looking and um unwashed like unbathed dirty
clothes those are the two telltale signs and according to a classmate of her like apparently
this guy when this whole story came out he's a doctor now his facebook post went went viral because he was like i remember jennifer because
she was the kid nobody wanted to talk to you they were in the second grade so like the kids
obviously the kids didn't recognize i don't know better he said we remember like the smelly kid
and he's like the guilt i feel for not like acknowledging or reporting even though it's
not on the kids it's on the adults and it's a failure on everyone at that school and oh by the
way there were so many things they were homeschooled because it's not legal to just pull your kids out
of school there's a record they set up oh the principal is the dad whatever they set up this
fraudulent homeschooling they never homeschool the kids and you're supposed to have monthly weekly
when you're I don't know the whole thing but like when you're a part of the American homeschooling system there are weekly check-ins that you have to provide you
have to provide curriculum no one was ever checking in there was like a million ways when
like there was a million ways that they could have been like a tipped off to what was going on
never it took the kid the girl risking her life jumping out of the window to save her and her siblings and
it was just the way they were talking about the siblings oh it was just terrible it was so so sad
that's so sad you know what it also makes me sad to think about not to make it worse but like i
think a lot of situations teachers do recognize signs of abuse and that's how a lot of kids are
helped and saved um but also think about how many kids during covid and didn't go to school and i know i was
like didn't have food at home one a lot of kids like they're when they go to school like they're
getting a lunch they're getting like a meal and that's so important for them they're also getting
like all these things if they come from a bad home life yeah and there's so many degrees of a bad
home life and there's obviously that extreme but there's also you know lesser forms and like all
those kids stayed home for over a year i know and all those signs of abuse were went unseen but you know what else
it's like gabriel fernandez his teachers saw bruises and sent cps and it made his home situation
worse so it's like there's really no like saving kids in that situation because only,
you know,
maybe one out of 10 times,
does it actually work?
And then we know the,
so they get out of the abusive home and into a foster care home.
That's decent at best.
At best.
Right.
Yeah.
And I'm sure there's some lovely foster care families.
This is not a general statement.
Yeah.
It's the exception.
Yeah.
No,
even if you're able to get the teacher,
see it,
CPS does their job. They take the kid. Where do they put them? Right. It's the exception. Yeah. No, even if you're able to get the teacher, see it. CPS does their job.
They take the kid.
Where do they put them?
Right.
Because with the Gabriel Fernandez situation, it was a huge failure on CPS.
It's so much.
So I think like Gabriel Fernandez even had a file at that.
I think the FBI even looked into it because it was so obvious.
Like they had one of the nurses in the documentary being like, I never saw anything like that
in my life.
It was just, I'm sorry to like be so dark but it was just
really eye-opening and really horrible but like now like I love following her on TikTok did they
get their money yet because of Diane Sawyer I don't know but like we're gonna need to follow
up we're gonna need another GoFundMe yeah totally directly or let's all just like follow them on
TikTok like that's a way of supporting people, like brand deals, things like that.
Like Jennifer also has a TikTok.
The other ones, the oldest one who didn't want to show his face,
but sent like a little video of himself from the back.
His name is Jordan.
We don't know any of the other kids names
because they've been protected.
Obviously they've chosen not to participate,
which is totally understandable.
So I think in our own ways, like we can help.
I followed her like everyone should follow her.
Yeah.
So that's what I did this morning. I'll get that's a good worthy cause that's what I did this morning
um I feel like it's I've been up what time is it almost 10 hours I don't know like where this road
takes me I've never slept two hours before I think it takes you to a nap a nap and then we have our
meet and greet right so like I have to be on maybe I like nap in the car on the way to the meet and greet i think that's like why don't you nap after this
i don't know i just like i'm here i want to spend time with kaylor i want to spend time with you
like i want to go outside in the pool like you don't want to waste hours of daylight i know
that's how you're supposed to sleep at night when nothing's happening yeah no i tried that it just
it wasn't working for me i'm sorry so that's what i did how was your uh morning obviously different
than mine obviously different than mine
obviously different than yours but it's been actually a nice morning because we're moving
like a little slowly and that is very helpful for me so it was going really well until you
shared that story I'm so sorry um I don't know how to pivot well I really don't no I know I'm
like kind of like a lot of times you share a sad story but
it's been a few years and here's where they are now no i know and you didn't give us that no but
that gave us worse and worse the two girls who we know seem to be doing really great like they both
are so beautiful i think that the way that they were raised in terms of like health will impact
their health forever like i don't think they can really like realistically change that the way that they were raised in terms of like health will impact their health forever like i don't think they can really like realistically change that the way that they
look like they're both super super thin um but the thing is is like we don't know about the other
kids so like that's where the darkness lies yeah so i'm so sorry to have done that to everyone um
but it's something that needs to be spoken about like fuck that city council woman and the one that spoke to them retelling of it was very good if you ever wanted to do like a
podcast about true crime crazy true stories i think you had a future i feel like this is a general
statement on the true crime genre and this is not saying that those people are bad or that people
listen are bad there doesn't feel something like inherently weird about talking about like a
very gruesome murder or a tragedy in a small town brought to you by like,
like it's the monetization and like the,
the cult following vibe of true crime podcast does like give me a little bit
of the heebie jeebies.
I hear that.
And I don't disagree with you.
I can't really speak to it because I've never listened to an episode.
By the way, it's important to share that I haven't either.
In every single episode there, you know, they come at it from like an emotional point of
view.
They're affecting change.
They're solving crimes.
It's possible.
Maybe some of these true crimes are donating a part of the proceeds from every episode
to the person impacted in each episode.
I don't know what they're doing over there.
I'm not going to judge them.
Maybe there's some that.
That's totally fair.
If they are doing that,
then I take back everything that I said.
Yeah.
But I hear what you're saying.
Yeah.
Because if they're not doing any of that.
It's just weird.
Like.
Yeah.
Creating a brand off of like other people's misery.
No?
Yeah.
So that's just my thought.
But I don't.
I can't speak to it.
No, me neither neither i've never listened
to true but let me know if they're you know paying it forward with with this thing see it's like
only murders in the building like in that first season did their podcast benefit the victim
no they like slandered that deli owner and like the victim's like you know personal life yeah no seriously like if i you know i'm
tragically ever you know disappeared and murdered like please don't make a podcast about me like
i feel like you would like that no because i wouldn't be like around to get the followers
so like what you should get the followers no no not only that but like you know really personal
things come out in an investigation like they obviously they have to go through your phone
like what were you doing the time like what if at the time i was like pooping like you know really personal things come out in an investigation like they obviously they have to go through your phone like where were you doing the time like what if at the time I was
like pooping like you know what I mean like your face tuning literally please like don't make a
podcast about if anything happens to me like I'm not interested could I do the podcast okay you
know I would I aside from calling you an influencer mentor yeah I wouldn't say anything slanderous no
and I think like you would I trust your judgment like if there's something in the file that like is really embarrassing to my legacy
you would obviously not yeah speak it yeah you would just be like among other things i say it's
classified classified that would be the name of the podcast claudified claud's declassified
done tnn here we come.
So we have a great show, Five Stories, Dear Toasters, which are really unique.
I can't wait.
So I'm ready to dive in because I'm feeling like we need a change of pace.
Yes, we do.
So without further ado, feel so good to say that when you know where are you, the Stryce brothers are right here.
It's true.
The Brice is on your lap, Thrice is on my toe.
I've got my eyes on
both of them so without further do it is time for the fast five stories that you need to know before
you wake up and take a bite out of your morning toast and today's episode is brought to you by
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Our first story, Brooklyn Beckham is being roasted on social media for claiming his career
as a, quote, social media chef paid for his $1.2 million car.
Have you seen this?
No, but like I did see one video where he cooked.
So I guess that makes you a chef now.
So a viral TikToker recently caught up with Brooklyn Beckham while he was out cruising
around Beverly Hills.
Daniel Mack?
Red McLaren P1.
Yes. Okay. The way I fucking love Daniel Mack. Let me Beverly Hills. Daniel Mack? Red McLaren P1, yes.
Okay, the way I fucking love Daniel Mack,
let me tell you who Daniel Mack is.
He's a TikToker who, he started off like so cute
and he's still cute,
but like his initial content was so like innocent.
He would just walk around like really nice parts
of different neighborhoods and see really nice cars
and just go up to people and be like,
hi, I love your car.
What do you do for a living?
Yeah.
People always had really interesting answers. It was never like Wall Street like it was always
just something I have a patent it was always like unique unique tings then people started reaching
out to him so he would get like celebrities on and like go up to people and it would be like an
OnlyFans model that everyone loves um and he really like built his brand then he bought himself a car
and it was like so cute and I love his videos okay so he thank you for explaining that
that's what he does he went up to Brooklyn Beckham and his McLaren and said by the way when it's a
celebrity like it's usually staged I don't think this was really because he said hey man what do
you do for a living your car is awesome that's what he does it when it's staged too like with
a celebrity he's like been um in contact with to like get a video. I think like Diplo did one. A million celebrities have done it.
Okay, well, Brooklyn Beckham responded, I'm a chef.
And then Daniel Mack was like, you're a chef, really?
Are you like the best chef in the world?
And he said, trying to be.
In Brooklyn Beckham's defense,
what does he do for a living, you know?
No, but then people were commenting.
What do you do for a living?
I was born.
That's literally what people are commenting,
roasting him like, okay, maybe you like to cook,
but that's not how you paid for your McLaren.
No, for sure.
But like, if he was put on the spot,
which I just, I refuse to believe
that this wasn't like a pre-organized event,
but if he was put on the spot,
like it's a hard question for Brooklyn Beckham.
He doesn't really have a job.
Right, I would have thought he would say model.
Yeah, I would have said that too. I would have said model if I was him obviously he wants to be taken seriously as
a chef but like I really hope this wasn't staged because that makes him look even worse if it wasn't
staged it's just like an awkward situation to be in considering like yeah I didn't I can forgive
it if it's not staged yeah but if he chose this for himself and really is that is the tiktok in there the like the link to daniel mac
because if it's like so usually he'll go up to like five different people in a video and like
get their reaction sometimes people don't want to be on it sometimes they do but if it's just
like one video dedicated to the person then it's really like it's a setup thing you know okay do
you want me to look it up yeah we're gonna get
to the bottom of this and like sometimes he'll like take it one step further and do yachts it's
really interesting that's a really cool thing it's a cool concept i wonder that all the time
yeah like what do people do for a living who have like these big houses and shit sometimes
they'll get invited to people's houses okay a brooklyn beckham here so mclaren it's a 1.2
million dollar car That's fucking crazy
Yeah
Oh he knows Daniel Mack
He tagged Brooklyn Beckham
Are you the best chef in the world?
Let's see if there's anyone else in the video
Because if there isn't
My name's Brooklyn
Yeah we know
Any advice for people trying to get into cooking?
Yeah
Just follow your passion
Whatever makes you happy
It's easy to say when you have like a billion dollars in the bank
Sounds like someone who doesn't have a job He's the only one in the video it's like a dedicated
post i do believe it is um it looks like it's just like a coordinated partnership like maybe
he tagged him he wants like maybe tiktok followers he probably does want to okay wait sorry the plot
thickens so brooklyn beckham is like new to tiktok he has one video and 48 000 followers his first this
video was posted in 2021 so maybe he's like getting back into it and the video he posted
in 2021 was of him cooking um but it does feel oh his following list is hidden he follows four
people i wonder if he follows daniel mack He's not letting me investigate because I guess on TikTok, you can hide who you follow.
Wow.
Fuck.
I'm starting to feel like this with stage energy just really.
Jackie, here's Helen Mirren, okay?
Like big celebrities do it.
It's kind of like a press thing now.
That's cool.
I never heard of it.
This video has 50 million views.
That's really cool.
I'm sure.
I can't believe, like her car was 260K.
I can't believe he's riding around in a million dollar car.
LeBron James is 770,000.
Like,
why the fuck is Brooklyn Beckham,
no offense,
someone who's never worked a day in his life,
jealous,
riding around in a car
that's worth over a million dollars?
And then honestly,
like,
I just feel like if this was strategic,
like someone on his team
like really should have advised him against this
or at least helped with the job description. Yeah it would have been funny if he if he like
poked fun at himself yeah but and i feel like maybe that's not his car could be his parents
could be his wife's and he just like oh totally he just went to the coolest car in his arsenal
to do daniel mac not in his arsenal coolest car that he had access to right right right
to do daniel mac and then didn't realize that like he sounds kind of stupid like an out
of touch well I enjoyed talking about it so to that for that I'm grateful to Brooklyn and Nicola
and all the people who made this possible and Daniel Brooklyn and Nicola are like the top of
the news every single day there's something every single day because he um she was supporting him or he
was supporting her one of them has a project coming out who knows plus like the victoria
drama right like she's been speaking on the victoria she dyed her hair brown did you see
this i did i follow her on instagram and i have to say it's it was great during the wedding and
she's just like copying like other famous people's like no i saw her do a q a the other day and like
it was like you know it's meant to be like an I saw her do a Q&A the other day and like it was like, you know,
it's meant to be like an intimate Q&A
as Q&As on Instagram really are.
Should be, yeah.
You can learn a lot about someone
and everything was just like such nonsense.
Like every answer, every answer was like,
every question's sort of like what inspires you
sort of thing and like, you know,
it's just like follow your dreams.
Like it was fucking nonsense, not a drop of tea.
And imagine the question she
actually got like how much does your house cost like she probably got how are things with victoria
right right is brooklyn good in bed like i'm sure she got no extremely if i was there on time i
would have posted instead she like probably like chose ones along the lines of like you know
about her acting career sort of crap like it was and it's important to remember that like when like a big time celebrity or
influencer,
more so celebrity than influencer,
but when they do Q and A's,
they're like extremely,
you're doing it for a reason.
Like I know a lot of people who submit their own questions and I can't lie.
I did that once.
Cause I just wanted to clear something up,
but like they do it to either like to portray an image or to address one
particular thing.
So like,
it's clear that her Q and A was not really like get to know me and like
what my life is like.
It's like,
yes,
I'm an actress.
Take me seriously.
I'm an artist.
Yeah,
no,
it was a bunch of nonsense.
Who we,
and I wanted to see if she like saved it to her highlights.
I could give you an example of the nonsensicalness.
It was Brooklyn.
It was Nicholas mindless Q and a no.
And you know what?
Like it kind of makes sense.
Like why they're compatible.
Cause like they're both like extremely privileged. They're both kind of makes sense, like, why they're compatible. Because, like, they're both, like, extremely privileged.
They're both kind of out of touch.
They're living in the clouds.
They're living in the clouds on another planet that I would love to inhabit one day.
It must be so nice for them.
To just not know anything.
No.
To not know what it's like to record a podcast and realize that your sister's microphone is off.
And she posted, like, a long thing on her Instagram the other day about like her emotions.
I think to tell us that like everything's not what it seems
and that she has bad days too.
I'm sure she does.
But again, it was-
But they're not worse than mine.
It was couched in like nonsensical language.
You know, it's like this celebrity language
full of like buzzwords and empty words. I just want to give an example because I want you guys to's like this celebrity language full of like buzzwords and empty words
i just want to give an example because i want you guys to just like understand yeah i think i know
what you're talking about but please an example would be great yeah the picture is of her crying
like looking very sad gorgeous so right and that's what i look like when i cry i don't know if you
guys know that yeah i'm stunning sometimes i find it hard to show the sad bits of me growing up with
seven siblings and two very strong parents made me really tough they hammered
it into me not to let people bring me down or hurt my heart it made me put up such a wall to protect
myself and especially in this industry actually as I'm reading this out loud I feel like this is
her way of responding to Bella to the criticism that she's a mean girl like I put up walls to
protect myself because of like the way I grew up can I tell you that when I read it for the first time like on my Instagram feed it felt I literally felt like it was a direct
response to like the Bella Thorne accusation all those years ago this accusation that she's an ice
queen that like her and Victoria are in this cold war because they're both really icy so I feel like
that's what she's saying perhaps we all have days where people make you feel bad and it's okay to be hurt
by it like that's just like nonsense okay no and like that's just like wait say it again we all
have days where make where people make you feel bad and it's okay to be hurt by it no we know
that like we learned that in school like it's called processing emotions like that's a celebrity
thing saying the most obvious thing in a fancy way and acting like
it's a revelation yeah you guys wait i just learned it's okay to be sad and and you could
be sad too sometimes and then they'll make it like a trendy like it's okay to not be okay
right so yeah it's giving nonsensicalness yeah this part i just thought i would write something
because i never show this side of me here I wanted to show you this side of me I'm still unsure which side this side that like could get hurt oh my god she's
she's human holy shit I didn't know that that's what she's saying I think and I don't want to
like laugh at someone no I actually really like her and I support her I just like cut back the
nonsense everyone please yeah like just show us who you are or don't be on
social media honestly it's like when people only show like the highlight reel and then
are like well there's this part of me too and it's like well you're the one who only showed
us the good part right if we think a certain way it's because you told us to think that way
right totally that's why that's how I feel about like erica jane and tom she's always like it was so dark i'm like
you made him seem like it wasn't yeah the king it's confusing for sure especially i read your
book i had so much respect for him right telling me the whole time it was terrible right and it's
possible that like you're covering up but like to go so far on one extreme would glow about him so
true it was unnecessary right no one No one asked. Right. Nobody.
Erica.
Tom is just the best.
Right.
Yeah.
But I can't wait to try some of his food.
Brooklyn.
Yeah.
He better be a good chef.
I just want to say.
After all of this.
Yeah.
They did like one video on like Vogue when they were engaged like cooking with the pelts
Bickhams.
Yeah.
That always like feels like a weird thing like celebrities who just want to try something new chef yeah no and i think it's like definitely
insulting to the chef community like oh yeah no i went to i put myself through culinary school
busing tables like i worked so hard my whole life taking shit job after shit job education education
this opportunity to finally make it and to call myself a chef.
Yeah.
And you made a pasta bolognese and you're a chef.
Yeah.
Well, by that standard, I'm definitely a chef because I make cereal all the time.
And you make dinner for Theo.
So true.
And that's not easy, especially recently.
It's on this new antibiotic.
It's been really tough.
A lot of mixing.
You're also a chemist.
My cauldron.
Are you ready for our next story? That's right. That's what Claudia sent it in she said she wanted in the stories yeah and that's what you get when you follow
i'm like embarrassed like because i'm literally forgetting her name and she's like actually my
friend what is alice's name ashley green i'm so sorry when you follow when you follow
ashley green she's a host of the twilight effect podcast which i was on one time check it out um
and they always have like interesting guests and this time they had i think the director
um he was just sharing information here's what he shared taylor swift was turned down for a part
in twilight new moon because it would have been too distracting. I'm having like. Heartburn?
No.
Like the lights in my head.
It's just like I'm feeling like lightheaded.
Do you want me to read?
I don't know what's wrong with me.
Maybe I'm just like looking in too many places.
Have you had something to eat today, sweetheart?
Yeah, I had oatmeal and a Go Macro bar.
So I should be full.
All right, let me know if you want me to do the reading.
I'm such a good reader.
I think it's just like maybe I have just kind of a dull headache at all times.
And it's bright in here.
And it's really bright, yeah.
Taylor Swift was apparently rejected from a role as an extra in Twilight New Moon
as the director thought her appearance would steal focus from the rest of the film.
At the time of the Twilight saga's prominence,
the singer was a known fan of the books and films.
She was a twi-hard.
In a new interview, Chris Weitz whites who directed the second twilight film
revealed that he reluctantly had to deny her the part of an extra in the background taylor was a
huge twi hard and taylor and i had the same asian at the time and he said taylor would like to be
in this movie not because of you but because she's a twi hard she would be someone at the
cafeteria or the diner whatever but she just wants to be in this movie although it wouldn't have been
a major role for the singer the director believed that the surprise appearance of a major celebrity would distract from the rest of the film.
As a result, he turned down the proposition. He said, the hardest thing for me was to be like,
the moment that Taylor Swift walks onto the screen for about five minutes, nobody's going to be able
to process anything. I kicked myself for it too, because I was like, wow, I could have been hanging
out with Taylor Swift. I just want to say, I think he's wrong. Wow wrong wow okay and the reason why I think that is because
of what Game of Thrones did having Aaron Rodgers Chris Stapleton in like the final season because
they were huge fans took away from nothing just a fun little fact she could have easily been
disguised and by the way like Twilight is as big of a machine as Taylor Swift was at that time
now she's like you know that would be like having Beyonce in your movie but
at that time she was still huge but it just would have been like a really fun thing yeah and I don't
think it would have distracted at all and if anything like New Moon would have been distracting
because it was bad yeah the thing about New Moon is that it's my least favorite because Edward is
in it for 45 seconds and Eclipse is actually the worst one because that's the one about newborns
no for sure but like Edward's in it being sexy
and like, you know, the end is like bad.
Like the plot is not my favorite,
but like there's goodness in it.
Fucking second one, Edward's gone.
Bella's fucking depressed.
Like it sucks.
Yeah.
There's a possibility.
That's a song playing when she's going around.
There's a possibility.
And she's like, there's a possibility and she's like it's snowing then there's leaves it's blossoming are changing seasons are changing and she's just like depressed like not leaving
her house because edward's fucking gone and i would do the same fucking thing that reminds me
of the special i'm grateful for the seasons yeah from tim dillon you love quoting comedy specials
i do i wonder what that says
about me um that you're hilarious that's what it says I think so I'm able to apply comedy jargon
in everyday life I was gonna say that I obviously think that like while it would have been amazing
it definitely would have been a distraction but you do raise an interesting point about Game of
Thrones even though I don't think that Chris Stapleton or Aaron Rodgers are as visually as distracting, even together as also because, I mean, I guess like they were playing like cavemen and they
look like cavemen, whereas like she would be playing a high school senior and she does look
like a high school senior. So she could fit in, but like Taylor, she's not one to blend in,
you know, with the hair and the lips. It's also like in High School Musical 2 at the end,
like Miley gets a cameo and like that just added to the movie.
It was a fun thing.
She's dancing like great.
And she was like a huge star at the time.
Yeah, that's, no, that's totally true.
And by the way, what's interesting
is what they did do in.
And it's not like it was the first Twilight
where it's like this could eclipse the whole franchise.
It's like Taylor's in the movie.
They had some good, really, I mean, good momentum,
huge momentum.
It was the biggest franchise in the world.
Like throw her in. Yeah, especially because I think in the fourth movie Breaking Dawn part one the
woman who wrote the book Stephanie Meyer is an extra she's a guest at the wedding so you see her
in the ceremony when Bella's walking down and then I think you see her like eating a piece of cake
um and a lot the fandom knew her very well so there is a way to do it in a way that's like
not distracting and classy but I'm also curious curious about the timing as it pertains to Taylor Lautner.
Ooh.
Was she trying to just.
Be with her mans.
Or like.
They were together during that movie Valentine's day.
And that was so much later.
Right.
But so like,
maybe she was like into him and like,
that was like her first and it didn't work out.
So she like forgot about it.
But then later on they happened to be cast in a movie together.
Maybe she was like,
had a crush on him for many years. And of all men taylor has dated i don't think anyone you know
has more glowing review than taylor lautner back to december it's like the only song where like
she's wrong you know yeah and she goes back to december all the time beautiful turns out freedom Freedom ain't nothing but missing you. Wishing I'd realize what I had when you were mine.
I go back to December.
Turn around and change my own mind.
She's mad at herself.
She literally bounced.
And he was just like, this is such a nice guy.
Yeah.
But now I'm happy for him because he's engaged to a girl named Taylor.
So we all win.
We really do.
Especially Taylor, who gets to marry Taylor L girl named Taylor. So we all win. We really do.
Especially Taylor, who gets to marry Taylor O'Hanner.
Right.
We're all winners.
Are you ready for our next story?
Julia Louis-Dreyfus' son, Charlie, has joined the Sex Lives of College Girls cast.
Wait.
Julia Louis-Dreyfus' youngest son named Charlie has been cast in season two of Sex Lives of College Girls. That show, which I adore, is literally breeding ground for nepotism. Timothee Chalamet's sister, everyone,
you know? So true. But he really looks like a regular college guy. And he's an actor and he's
in other projects too, but it looks like a perfect casting. Now, I don't know this man. I'm sorry to
this man. But when it comes to nepotism, I much judge on a case-by-case basis and i will not be judging in a negative way because julie louis dreyfus you know has contributed so
much to pop culture to television to entertainment she could do whatever the fuck she wants and
honestly her son's kind of hot so yeah how old is he what how old is he he's 26 25 i don't want to
be out here calling like 14 year olds hot you know know, kids these days, they're like 12 and they look 25.
Yeah.
When they're also 25 and they look 12.
It's so confusing.
And yet I'm 28 and look 24.
How old do you guys think we are?
Sound off in the comments.
Actually, sure.
Jackie, I'm not interested in hearing what anyone thinks about how I look, honestly.
Wow.
Yeah.
What if it's a compliment?
No, because it might be a compliment.
To them. They think. But really. It's compliment to them to me it's an influencer mentor yeah because people are always like oh my god and it's so
nice like ever since i've like lost like 25 pounds actually um people are like you look amazing but
like so i didn't look amazing before okay i just want you to know if you go back to before you
started dieting and you look at pictures from like the show post-show pictures like everyday people are like your skin's glowing your hair's amazing
where's your romper from okay okay no that's fair yeah it's just interesting but like you know it's
not like you're only getting compliments but that's life you know like somebody says something
and you internalize it in a different language right but also you do look good like leave it
at that take the compliment take the win walk away. No, for sure. For sure.
Being gorgeous.
It's a lot of mental, you know, anguish.
Anguish.
Do the flip.
You have to stop quoting a special.
Nobody knows what we're talking about.
Okay.
I'm quoting Tim Dillon special.
Go watch it.
Do a flip.
I love sex lives of college girls.
I think it's so good.
Waiting for season two with Bated Breath.
Excited about Julia Louis-Dreyfus.
Me too.
I hope that he's great.
I mean, Timothee Chalamet's sister is great.
So sometimes nepotism can open you up to a great talent.
100%.
I'm open to it.
And Timothee Chalamet's sister is the best part of the show.
She's so fucking funny.
And I love Renee Rapp. I've been keeping up with her post-show. timothy chalamet sister is the best part of the show she's so fucking funny and i love renee rap
i've been like keeping up with her post show but her brother isn't on season two like i know her
brother on the show yeah that guy who was fucking kimberly yeah which was just like a nico nico i
know he got like another job that show's gonna be like the next girls like i don't know why
anyone would leave it moron people are so dumb it like it's fun to watch it boggles the mind but it could never be me
like i get on a hit show you don't have to drag me off the set my cold dead body you'll be doing
like the reboot you'll be doing the rewatch podcast i'm the first one to sign up i'm doing it all
yeah are you ready for our next story like really switching i'm lucas graybiel for sure
sorry you were the first one in the reboot yeah first one to sign up the first one posting on
social media it's in my bio like no you know who you are who
what bart johnson you're on cameo 100 i'm bart. 100%. Because I'm still really good looking, even after
the show's long over, and I will be the first one
on set. You're commenting on
all the cast. When the reboot happens.
You're commenting on all the cast members' Instagrams. I'm commenting on
E! News' post every time they post about something
even remotely Disney related. You are doing
cameos in character. I'm motherfucking
Bart Johnson. What are you two doing in a tree?
Evil fucking laugh okay are you ready for our next story tamra judge is closing cut fitness after nearly 10 years in
business quote it's sad that is sad tamra and her husband eddie are saying goodbye to their business
people can confirm that the couple have officially closed cut fitness the gym they own in Rancho Santa
Margarita California the pair opened the studio in March 2013 unlike big box chain gyms the fitness
studio focused on personal training you uh nutrition coaching and spartan race training
among other things sounds horrible don't know if you know this but cut stands for cardio unique
training and I just it's getting sir no but that's your favorite word it's unique yeah no this definitely feels like a
ripoff of sir like no but they had a 10-year run uh she talked about it on her podcast with
teddy melon camp which we haven't discussed the fact that they have a podcast together i know and
i feel like i'm always seeing it around me too since i feel like it does pretty well i love that
for them i can't like it's surprising that they're friends yeah but you know what it's the recipe for
perfection like two house two fired housewives who will literally do anything to stay relevant
on their respective shows um it's literally like you can't create more chaos than that. Like they're both clinging on to what they once had.
But I feel like that's,
even if other housewives like tried to do this,
it would just be sad.
But there's something like pretty respectable
about their podcast.
I don't know why I feel that way,
but I feel like they actually do it.
They do it.
And it's always charting.
Sometimes they make news.
It's called two T's in a pod,
really cute name.
And I guess,
cause they're like an unexpected duo.
Anyways, they're making news once again,
but Tamara is sad about the gym.
I think it's really the end of an era,
but she also talked about her CBD company.
You know, they have a CBD-
They were on our podcast talking about it.
Being a CBD, they're sold at Sally Beauty stores
and Tamara said their CBD business is very successful.
It pays her way more than the show
so i thought that was interesting that is interesting and you know what like having a
brick and mortar store for 10 years is not easy no matter what you're selling no and to own a gym
in covid was really hard so to have made it this far is an accomplishment it's an accomplishment
um it is the end of an era you know it's like koto insurance it's iconic um but you know when she came on our show to talk about her cbd like they pitched her
for the cbd and we were like yeah sure but we just wanted to talk to tamra and then the more i spoke
to her about it the vibe i got was like she was running like an actual like legitimate business
and i think she must have like invested a lot of money in this like really early on and it's
paying off i do believe that her cbd company is like legit yeah I mean to me and Sally Beauty is not easy yeah so
good for her yeah I have to assume she was making about a million dollars a season um on housewives
so that means she's making more than a million dollars yeah I thought that was you know a little
bittersweet news yeah no it's sad but it's time yeah but also maybe it's like it was time to move
on from the gym because these other ventures are just more profitable.
Or it was time to move on from the gym
because she didn't have the show to really supplement like marketing wise.
Like no one would have heard of Cut Fitness.
It just would have been like another nice gym in Orange County.
But like being attached to the show and having all the events there
and all the girls going to train there, like it's good marketing.
Right, but she is going back on the show.
So I feel like she could have held out if she wanted to.
Yeah.
But maybe it just wasn't worth it.
Yeah.
That's what I'm saying.
So I hope everything's okay.
Speaking of another institution that's shutting down,
but some good news.
So I don't know if we spoke about this or if you guys knew that the
Central Park boathouse is closing.
Oh,
you knew that.
I told you.
I don't remember.
Which really is like.
Iconically sad.
Iconically sad. Iconically sad.
Yeah.
The New York Post had written like an op-ed about why we need to save the boathouse.
And a secret billionaire has made a $6 million offer to save the Central Park boathouse after
reading the post.
I wish a secret billionaire would just like save me.
But that is so cute.
Gotta know who he is just because like the more billionaires I'm aware of,
the better.
But I love that,
you know,
it's important to invest in your city and I'm glad someone else is.
So I don't have to.
And I've never been to the boathouse.
So I know it's iconic.
It's where Carrie and Big fell into the lake.
Like I know all about it.
I've just personally never been there.
So.
Yeah.
So the operator had said he had no choice but to close the Central Park restaurant on
October 17th due to skyrocketing costs.
Then the secret billionaire approached the operator with a deal to finance the renovation
of the iconic property and keep it open under his current contract with the city.
The original author of the New York Post op-ed said, however, you played it.
This is bad news for the city.
A darkened boathouse would leave a heartbreaking hole in the park at a time when New York's green lung needs all the wholesome,
law-abiding human traffic it can handle.
It's so true.
Straight facts.
If it were to officially close,
it would just be reflective of the state of the city,
exiting the pandemic, just not doing well.
So you know what? Al just not doing well um so you know what alas there is hope yeah so i think that's some some good positive news if you were hoping to get married at the
boathouse one day like the dream is still alive recreating the carrie and big like kiss thing
yeah um also if anyone happens to know like who the secret billionaire is like i'm just like curious
and nosy so write in the comments or if you like don't want to like out yourself feel free to send me a dm I'm just like beyond curious like there's
so many billionaires in New York why must it be a secret I feel like owning the boathouse would be
you know a crown jewel in your portfolio so it's probably like a billionaire who's not famous and
like doesn't want to be famous he likes being rich like he knows that like maybe he looks out on the
park and wants to see it flourishing no he's probably smart enough and like experienced enough to know like people want to be rich and famous
and really if they were rich it would solve 99 of their problems like fame does nothing
yeah but there's so much ego yeah but so i'm saying like a normal billionaire might not do
it but we happen to find like a humble billionaire who sounds like he would make great great husband we're disgusting saying he oh let's be real it's probably like god it's probably um unless it's mackenzie you know
that is so terrible of me but like i mean it's kylie can you and let me just google something
really quick like how many billionaires maybe it's female
billionaires percentage male billionaires i never know like what to say into google like i just type
the whole thought how many female billionaires are there compared to thank you as of 2022
number of billionaires around the world in 2019 by gender okay so statistics are on my side i'm not just being a bitch but this is also in the world male 2489
billionaires yeah female 336 so it's like it's apples into oranges um and that's not to say
women can't be billionaires i just know the world we live in so i'm not saying i don't believe women
can be she never said that i was sitting here the whole time i never said that i know statistics
because you know i'm always watching those videos. Like, now this. You know that, like, weird, like, that was, like, putting shit together.
And it's, like, always sharing random shit.
And it's, like, here's the, you know, the richest person in every state.
And this is just the statistics, not me.
There's, like, two women.
And they're either, like, an heiress or a widow.
Yeah, or a divorcee.
Right.
So, sorry, I'm not just, like, being a bitch against women.
It's just what the thing said.
Facts are facts. And that's because women aren't
given opportunities and that's not my fault.
Don't fucking put that on me you fuck bitches. No she's creating
opportunities for women all the time. 100%.
To have a great. I'm creating
opportunities for women to have a great time at my show.
Tickets available at girlnojob.com
slash tour. So I can be the 397th
female
billionaire. And you know what I would do keep it all for myself
and for Theo of course of course and of course give to Charlie he could get his foot fixed
of course I would give it to charity the charity world is everything no my charity is um
cookies for Claudia the Turpin family thank you for bringing it back you get a big house oh no
actually that might be you know i was
actually thinking when diane was telling us all about this like diane buy them a house like
seriously like just pay the mortgage for the rest of your life like come on you have so much money
like i know it's not on her but i can't imagine she wasn't so moved by everything she learned and
like i'm sure they sat down for the interview ready just like to see how life was going and
wasn't expecting to find that like it's still going on and I'm just like come on Diane or Justin Bieber too like come on agreed and I think that
you know when you're watching yes and maybe she does gift but I think also part of her job being
her job like she probably has to draw a line somewhere because if she was moved by every
single case she's only like 11 homes. She would have, yeah. So.
That's just not sustainable.
Yeah.
But it was just like,
Diane was like, oh no, what can we do?
I'm like, I don't know.
Aren't you like the most powerful woman in the world?
Like do something.
Right, what can we do?
What can you do? You're chasing down this like moronic chairwoman
of the council of this local board.
It's like, Diane Sawyer's here.
Like, Diane, like make a call.
We're saved.
Make a call.
All right.
Start another fun. Put it on your call. We're saved. Make a call. All right. Yeah, like, start another fund.
Put it on your Instagram.
Call your friends.
Yeah.
I just thought it was like, oh, no.
Like, Diane, like.
That's like when a lot of celebrities get backlash for posting, like, GoFundMes for their family members.
Or their friends and the friend's family.
And it's like, well, you could pay the bill.
Yes.
I do think that it depends on the celebrity.
Because there's this general, like, I think a lot of people overestimate the type of money certain
celebrities make but like lady gaga posting like save my dad's restaurant like you fucking save
your dad's restaurant bitch i just bought your album like go fucking do it that was weird of her Yeah. Not cool. Not cool.
Are you ready for Dear Toasters?
Yes.
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what we really like about it is just like they have a food database and it's just so interesting.
Like when you're eating stuff, like if you're not really thinking about it, just like they have a food database and it's just so interesting like when you're eating stuff like if you're not really thinking about it you're not thinking about
what's in the food um so they have a really extensive database that just lets you know like
what exactly is in everything you're eating um and you can track your day see your day at a glance
at a glance which i think is really helpful yeah noom i'll catch you in three weeks when i'm weaned
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trial today. Excuse me, what do you have to lose? Sorry, it wasn't in the copy, actually. I think
maybe they've moved on from that sentiment. Dear Toasters, our Wednesday weekly advice segment. So
if you're looking for advice from your two favorite gal pals,
you can email deartoasters at gmail.com.
Deartoasters at gmail.com.
And we'll keep it anonymous.
You can change people's names.
We'll never know.
And if you write us an email and then you regret it and you follow up,
like, please don't read this, we do get those emails too.
So don't worry.
We're never going to read something nobody wants us to read.
We have three really good ones today, okay?
I'm going to go, I'm going to go, least crazy to most crazy. Okay, good. I need to work my way
up. I need to turn these lights off so I can think. Okay, ready? Hello, beautiful, stunning,
and smart queens. I'm a longtime male toaster, breather, Instagram follower, comedy tour guest.
Who is this man? I've recently come across some news
regarding one of my close friends that I just cannot shake from my head. My friend, let's call
her Margo, has recently shared with me that she only showers once a week. This came up when we
were at a fair and I said to her that I was going to go home and shower for the second time that day
after walking around the heat and the fog of the barbecue smoke for hours. She then shared with me
that she only showers on Sundays. Mind you, it was Friday. She tried to explain to me that her lack of bathing is the reason for her skin
being so soft and that the reason she hates showering is due to some unresolved trauma
from her childhood. Apparently, her parents would make her shower every day and she absolutely hated
it and it would cause conflict in her family. This then created some resentment from her towards
showering. I've heard you both talk about this on the podcast before
So I just wanted some input on how to navigate this
She doesn't ever really smell
And I'm not sleeping with her yet
But I just can't shake this every time I see slash think of her
Please give me your thoughts slash advice
Sincerely, a clean toaster who usually showers twice a day
But at least once
Okay, so two things
First, the fact that she showers once a week
And then I'll get into like the reason.
The trauma.
The trauma.
But the first thing, showering once a week,
yeah, not most of us do it,
but if you're saying she doesn't smell,
she has this like gorgeous skin,
and maybe she's onto something.
Okay, so she'll smell like barbecue for the next two days,
but if you're not gonna be with her,
and it really doesn't bother you,
that's just like a weird thing.
I would also just double check
that she didn't
mean she washes her hair once a week because there's two different types of showers um and
girls like i have like three different types of showers you know like one full immersion going in
hair everything shaving second is like a light body between washes you know and then the second
is like a the third is like a deep body no no hair. It's like everyone has their own version.
I just really have two.
I have three.
Showering without hair, showering with hair.
But there, I think there's two different types of showering without hair.
Okay.
But say she's talking about like, she really doesn't shower, shower.
I mean, back in the day, people only took baths whenever they could carry all the water.
No, I'm sorry.
Taking a shower once a week is not normal.
So we have to get to the root of it.
And it sounds like we're at the
root of it I do feel like she's probably holding back on she wasn't going to share like her deepest
childhood trauma like all the details at the barbecue I feel like there's probably more there
yeah I would assume there is because just being forced to shower every day that's like what
parents make you take a shower that's growing up so I feel like there's more probably unresolved
trauma there and I honestly would take the route of encouraging her to explore that with a therapist yeah that's what I was gonna say
that's being a good friend honestly like yeah you can't help her yeah just be like I thought about
what you said and it's really stuck with me um and I want I care about you yeah and I just like
want to see you thriving I don't want you to be like held back and not like showering because
of something from your childhood like have you ever thought of talking to someone yeah i haven't heard the
soft skin thing um so as far as i know that's not true no i showering dries out your skin
so moisturize it afterwards but like if you don't i mean i show how can water
dehydrate your skin oh because it takes away from the oils because water and oil don't mix oh okay whatever bill nye um so what was our
advice talk to her about it encourage her to recommend help yeah like dig into that it's
something that should be resolved yeah even if she just she gets to the bottom of the trauma
but still only wants to shower once a week because she likes how it makes her skin feel that's fine
for her right she'll be clean on the inside.
All right, next up.
Good morning, ladies.
First of all, thank you for always delivering premium content no matter what.
Obviously, this was written before yesterday.
I'm going to giant pickle.
For some backstory, I had a boyfriend in high school who was my first everything.
His name was Jack, and we really loved each other, but we had some different goals and plans at that point in our lives.
We've talked maybe three to four times in the last 11 years.
Never wanting to commit otherwise, he lived all over the country
and really focused on building his career. He was engaged at one point, but called it off.
Fast forward to this weekend. I woke up at 6am on Sunday to go to the gym and I had a Venmo
notification on my phone. It was for $1 and it was from Jack. It had his phone number in the
comment part of the notification I've recently been
thinking about him and he reached I had recently been thinking about him and he reaches out like
this the notification came in around 5 a.m. so he obviously had been up drinking all night
I don't know if that's a fair he was up thinking about you he couldn't sleep he also was going to
the gym why were you a documentary yeah I had to work after the gym so I waited to call him I called
in the afternoon and we talked for almost two hours
Just catching up as if no time has passed
Which was how this worked with him every time we caught up
When I told him that I was engaged
He seemed genuinely happy for me
He's not on socials at all so he had no way of knowing that
In this conversation he told me the other efforts
He had made in the recent past to get a hold of me
I'm obviously very in love with my fiance
And I want to spend the rest of my life with him
But Jack has always been in the back of my mind.
Am I making a mistake to not see him next time he's in town?
End of October.
Or do I block his number and not even entertain it?
I struggle with living the rest of my life with a what if in the back of my mind.
Please help.
I will take the dragging through the mud if that's what's warranted.
Love, a forever loyal toaster.
No, my God, this is like a movie.
I was going to say, it sounds like a book.
I mean, I would have to really know what your fiance is like.
But like, is there a world in which you could be like,
I need to have a conversation with someone like before we move forward.
Are you open to that?
Like if he seemed like a really jealous type or like a protective type,
like you would know immediately that that's not something he would be open to.
But it reminds me of this book I read, Once Your Love's.
You know, her new fiance really understood she was like you need
to spend time with your ex-husband like make sure that like I don't want to be like your runner-up
like I want you to choose me because you want to choose me yeah that's very that's a fantasy yeah
what I would say to you is you know he could always be the one that got away but I do think
we have a tendency to romanticize the past and I think you had like a high school relationship um he probably seems really good and you know every
time you talk for two hours it's you know you have like a cute probably a little flirty conversation
and it's like fun and exciting but to live life with someone every single day and to find a person
who you enjoy doing that with um is not the same is a huge. And maybe every day in and out of Jack,
it's not going to be those two hour conversations.
And I think, you know, the bird in the hand
is worth two in the bush in this case.
And it's not like you were having doubts
about your fiance before.
And I think like Jack in theory is like,
ooh, so exciting in practice.
You know, it's another tough relationship
that you got to work through.
And I just don't think that, I think, you you know it's like cute and fun and sweet right now but you have the real thing with your fiance
right now and there's no way to know if you would have that with Jack just because every few years
you talk for two hours and reminisce about the good old days we were just talking about this on
the podcast about how like a lot of people look back and like romanticize that like last year of high school the summer before college like
and in actuality like it wasn't really like that for anyone we just like look back on that time
now through like rose-colored lenses whether it's because of like movies we've watched or just like
our youth and nostalgia so you're probably right in the sense that like you're remembering him
better or more romantically than it was not even that it's like so say you meet someone who you
enjoy for like an afternoon
and then you start thinking like,
oh my gosh, like every day would be like that
if we were together.
But it's like, no, think about the first time
you met your fiance.
Like, but the fact that you do have a life
that you love with your fiance,
like it really doesn't get better than that.
And the odds that it's gonna be better with Jack
considering it's pretty good right now
are extremely slim.
And considering like
you really don't know him anymore like a couple phone calls over 11 years is not a friendship
make yeah no that's not a relationship that's not living with someone like I think you found it
yeah I'm with Jack and I think that if you actually went down the road of exploring things with Jack
it would not work out just because most relationships don't work out hashtag I'm with
her she's right listen to Jackie don't listen listen anything i say no i think you were agreeing with me no for sure but like
your phrasing was just more on point all right this is the one i really wanted to get to okay
oh gosh because honestly i don't have any expertise in this at all do i i don't think so but again
i've never looked up your butthole so oh hey jackson claude hey i've been dating this new
guy for a few months and i have yet to tell him about a personal issue I have.
Hemorrhoids.
I try my best to not let them be seen during sex,
and I don't think he has ever seen them.
If he has, he's just being nice and not mentioning it.
So my dilemma is that I have to have a procedure done next week
where I have to be put under.
It's basically a colonoscopy,
and I don't know if I should tell him about it or not.
I've never been put to sleep before, so I'm nervous,
but I'm just too embarrassed to tell him.
Do you think I should just get this procedure done and keep it a secret?
Or should I go ahead and tell him so I don't have to keep hiding it
while I simultaneously work on incorporating more fiber into my diet
to shrink the roids?
If so, how should I go about telling him?
A toaster in distress.
How long have they been together?
A few months.
I think that you should tell him.
Now, there's something about the word hemorrhoids that's like
I don't know maybe it was in a movie or something where it's like you know it's like a gross word
yeah so when that when actual hemorrhoids are just like actually extremely common occurrence
for many people yeah so if you want to go full hemorrhoid go for it I always think honesty is
the best policy if you're having a major surgery and you are seeing someone like you have to tell
him you're doing something you could like lie and say that it's something like
gynecological and then he won't ask any more questions or you could just be honest um yeah
I'm okay with like a lie by omission like yeah I'm getting the thing done down there come pick me up
like but I think like you don't really have to go into like 100 percent detail. Like, first of all, you'll learn a lot when he's when you're out of surgery and like he's the one taking care of you.
If he is like that's what husbands do.
So you'll really be able to see.
And, you know, if it's going really well, maybe you can just be like, OK, like I was a little embarrassed.
But like, honestly, you've been so great.
I actually just have hemorrhoids.
I can't be doing it.
But if you got through it, he didn't know.
Like and no. But then like what if he's like acting like a child and you're like oh
wow i'm so fucking glad i didn't tell this guy i have hemorrhoids he's obviously like so immature
and not husband material you know right right i think we should see how he acts like before test
yeah it really is because that's what happens like when you're married like your husband sees
you at your fucking worst norovirus like you, well, I haven't been there yet,
but yeah,
like you're like,
like flesh everything.
Like,
yeah.
So if he's going to be a fucking pussy about some procedure,
like he's actually doing you a favor and saving you a lot of time,
but if he's great,
it's a good test.
I would use it as a test.
Yeah.
I,
I would tell him of some version of the truth.
Um,
and if it's going really well i think he'll think i don't
think he'll find it like deceptive of you i think he'll find it like cute of you like that you didn't
want to like there's nothing deceptive and it's not like it's a big thing like it's it's not like
something that's like contagious like you have hemorrhoids yeah it's so common it's like a
when you zoom out from the lens of the big Bang Theory, you literally can't even see them.
That's, I mean, it depends how big the hemorrhoids are.
That was your toaster.
Thank you to everyone for being particularly vulnerable this week.
Deertoasters at gmail.com for next Wednesday's show.
That is our episodes.
This is a very long episode, and I'm glad,
because after yesterday's audio, everyone deserves it.
So fingers crossed that when we take this SD card out of our- No, we're fine.
We're fine.
You never know.
So that's our show.
Our show.
No one else's.
Even though the Stryce brothers are here, it's not their show.
It's our show.
We have a great day ahead of us.
We're headed to our Spritz meet and greet in Fort Lauderdale.
So we're excited to see everyone there tonight.
And then we're back tomorrow with another fabulous show.
I think that's it.
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An incredible day
Incredible I'm so French incredible day that's not french you need babble to figure that out 100 and we'll
see you tomorrow goodbye