The Toast - S5 Ep40: Bravo, Bravo, Bravo with Paige DeSorbo: Wednesday, April 6th, 2022
Episode Date: April 6, 2022- Kim Kardashian Says She's 'Very Happy' and 'At Peace' with Pete Davidson (Page Six) - Kim Kardashian Introduces Pete Davidson to Daughter North West (Page Six) - Erika Jayne Named in $50 Mi...llion Racketeering Lawsuit (Page Six) - Rihanna, Jay-Z and Kanye Cracked Forbes' Coveted Billionaires List (Daily Mail) - Katie Holmes Shows Off Her Edgy Style As She Rocks a Nose Ring (Daily Mail) - Twitter is Working on an Edit Button For Real (Tech Crunch) The Morning Toast with Claudia (@girlwithnojob) and Paige DeSorbo (@PaigeSesorbo) Merch: https://shopmorningtoast.com/ The Morning Toast Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/themorningtoast Girl With No Job by Claudia Oshry: https://www.girlwithnojob.com/bookSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Good morning, Millennials! Welcome back to the Morning Toast. Happy Hump Day. Today is Wednesday, and I'm very excited to be joined by someone I've dreamt of humping for so long.
And she's finally here. You guys are quaking. I'm quaking. It's Paige DeSarbo. Paige, welcome to the Toast!
Oh my god, thank you so much. I'm so excited.
You look stunning. Like, very toasty.
I dressed for the set.
Yeah, no, you're looking good. You're looking like a part of the couch.
I was like, what would Jackie love to see?
I know.
So this has been really hard for Jackie because like this month, we don't really have a lot
of guests on the show.
And this month, obviously, thank you for subbing in for Jackie as she's on her maternity leave.
And it's like all the people Jackie wants to meet.
And she's like happy for the toast, but she's like devastated as well.
Jackie loves you.
Well, the audacity of her to have a baby right now.
It's honestly disgusting.
And it's so disrespectful to you.
It really is.
I DM'd her and I was like, it's just rude.
Isn't it crazy though?
That you wanted to be a mom right now.
So nasty.
I was like, I'm wearing silk.
How dare you?
I am so excited you're here.
First of all, I have like really fallen in love with you.
I was like very late to the Summer House game.
Okay.
And I really feel like your entry to the show kind of expedited my journey on the show because
I feel like you add just such great energy to the show.
Wow.
Don't read Twitter then.
Oh, do you read like a lot of?
I don't actually.
Good.
Like in this past season, I haven't gone on Twitter one time.
So smart.
And you just like, you can't.
You can't.
Is this a new haircut?
Yeah. I love. Oh my god I chopped it last week. That's so like brave and I mean that in a good
way. Like I wouldn't I'm so insecure like my hair is like my my like security. Okay well we filmed
the reunion on Friday. So you had this hair? And I was getting my I like showed my hairstylist what
I wanted and he was like well you have to be my hairstylist what I wanted. And he was like,
well, you have to be shorter for me to achieve that look. So he literally chopped it in my
kitchen. Like the morning of. It looks so, the morning of? Yeah. I'm in hair and makeup and
he's like, I'm cutting it. And I was like, cut it. Oh my, it looks so good. How was the reunion?
You know, um, reunion is like my least favorite day of the year.
And I almost passed out in the middle of it.
And Andy's like talking about God knows what.
And my whole left arm went numb.
Holy shit.
And my head started doing this like weird, like I literally thought I was having a stroke. And I was like, here I am having a stroke on national television.
Such good TV.
Yeah.
People are going to be like, she planned that.
She like passed out
on purpose people are so annoying you know there's a corner of the bravo fandom that's like
so fucking toxic it's insane it will it is a cult yes you know and i asked hannah this because this
is like what i'm most curious about when it comes to bravo reality shows is the reunion yeah and i
just want to know like what that's like because andy's always instagram storing he's like oh it's
8 a.m and then it's 8 p.m. and we're still here.
What are those days like?
When do you eat?
When do you go to the bathroom?
So we woke up this past reunion.
Amanda actually came over to my apartment at 5.30.
We started hair and makeup.
We got to the studio at 9.
We start filming at like 10.30, 11.
Andy had a call at 2, so we broke for lunch for an hour.
And then we went until like 7, 30.
Damn.
Yeah, it's crazy.
And you're probably so irritable just because like of the drama,
but then also because you're so fucking tired.
And also you're like, I don't care.
I know.
Because it was eight months ago.
A year ago.
Yeah, that's so true.
Like I don't remember.
That's actually so true.
I didn't think about that.
Well, I have like a whole list of summer house,
just really quick questions that I want to ask you.
And the first question comes from me,
but it also comes from every person on the planet.
Where the fuck is Alex?
So Alex,
oh,
he's so cute.
Was he at the reunion?
Um,
yes.
Alex is at the reunion.
The thing is that there were so many of us this year. Yes. And we are all camera whores.
Yes.
So like when things are happening, they just don't have enough camera people to follow everyone.
Right.
So it's kind of like the main stories get followed.
Yeah.
And he's like so nice that he wasn't like screaming at anyone.
I know.
And you know, that actually makes sense because the way that I perceive it is like, and that
was my next question, is just like the Danielle of it all.
How like this became Danielle's fight at the dinner party when low-key it had nothing to do with Danielle and I think in the same way like you you are to Sierra
what Danielle is to Lindsay and like you didn't really stand up and get involved so now knowing
that there's like a shortage of cameras like it actually makes sense like she was like looking for
a moment because it felt so odd to me I'm like this is a fight between Lindsay and Sierra like
why the fuck is Danielle getting all up in it but now now that actually makes sense
to me yeah and Danielle definitely goes very hard for Lindsay and so what um body did the two of
them bury together that they are like stuck together like that it's so weird probably strappy
it's so weird okay next question um oh I just was watching last night sierra on watch up inside
looking stunning beautiful perfect smart everything it's hard to look at her sometimes
it's really upsetting actually and then andy like made the comment about nurses and i thought that
was really funny and then like the nurses turned on andy but john mayer was the bartender and like
i was feeling something my mom texted me and she was like, all I want is for John Mayer and Ciara to go on a date.
I'm telling you, like there was vibes there.
There was.
And I wanted to know if like he texted her, got her number or anything.
I called her like immediately the next day.
And I was like, so you're marrying John Mayer.
But no, nothing happened.
But like she did smile.
And I was like, oh my God.
No.
And like she was just being so, and the whole, I felt bad for Andrea actually.
Cause like the whole episode of Watch What Happens Live was not about him it was about
Ciara and she was just like wearing this outfit and like she was glowing and it was like the
Ciara show and I just felt like John felt that energy for her absolutely I'm telling you something
could happen something's going on I know and he really likes younger girls like borderline
inappropriate but Ciara's of age and like I just think like it's it's gonna happen yeah I would
love to go to that wedding um I have some logistical questions about the summer house crew because you
guys are always admin you guys are always throwing parties yeah and Amanda's always kicking everyone
out at like six o'clock why so it gets to a point in the night where like okay we're done with the
party like just us as people and we have like more things to talk about we have more
things to film and we just don't need random people coming into our house who are like friends
of friends trying to be like hey like well i think we're like no one cares what you think
but thank you so much and who are those people who come to the parties like hamptons hanger honors
like who are they so a lot of that like we will invite our core main friends and then we'll be
like bring whoever you want with you there is like a list at the door that i don't think anyone's
ever looked at yeah um so sometimes it does feel like a free-for-all and amanda is just the best
at being like get the fuck out out of here yeah and so they listen to her i got a lot of questions
for you about why you never have your own room I have the same question so it's not a preference it just ends up like working out that
way yeah like the first summer when it was me and Hannah I wanted to room with Hannah because I was
like this is terrifying yeah and I need someone with me and then it just was like okay well me
and Hannah will always room together got it and then when
Hannah left I was like oh my god I'm gonna get my own room and then Sierra popped in and was like
want to share and I was like sure got it got it and now Craig is here and I'm like when will I
ever be an adult right because now I'm thinking like it feels like Craig and first of all like
the bullet I would take for you and Craig as a couple, like you
don't know like how many of my brain cells are devoted to your relationship, but not
in a weird way at all.
Yeah.
I just have loved Craig for a long time and I love you.
And like I, it's the couple I never would have expected, but it's perfection, like beyond
perfection.
And I don't want to put too much pressure on you, but like if you don't get married,
like I will be severely mentally ill from it.
So no pressure.
Just like letting you, just letting you know like what the status currently is i'll let you know and like
i have just we me and jackie were like watching winter house like for the page and craig of it
all yeah but it wasn't really it was just the start like it wasn't the real substance of your
relationship and now we're getting it and you and craig seem to be in a great place but on the show
like there's like drama and
I just want to know what it feels like to like have people talk about your relationship because
it doesn't really happen to me a lot but when it does like it's the worst thing ever it's just a
week it's like weird because you're like wait I I can see all the bad things you're saying like
talk about me behind my back like a normal person I know like saying it right to my face is so crazy
but I will actually say since we've been like up and down I know like saying it right to my face is so crazy but I will actually
say since we've been like up and down I feel like sometimes people love us sometimes people hate us
it's only brought us closer together that's great because I'm like oh my god did you see on
Instagram that we're both gained 15 pounds and he's like I didn't see that but thank you Paige
and I'm like well we must be in love we're getting fat so fucking funny like the way like I'm just so obsessed like I just think it's the greatest
couple and I'm so happy for you guys and I think a lot of people were like quaking like how could
she not choose Andrea but like yeah Craig is like so clearly the right choice like I just I really
respect your taste yeah because Craig is the one like I'm obsessed with Craig also Andrea was like going
through a whole thing in the summer yeah and like you don't really find that out until the end of
the summer and so like more of the beginning of the summer made so much more sense got it and
what Andrea and I had over the summer was exactly what we both wanted like we'd never talked right
and sometimes we would be like, you're hot. Right.
You're hot. Right. And then we're like, see ya. And that's what we needed. Yeah. I feel that a
hundred percent. Um, so guys, if you're not familiar with Paige, she's an icon, Bravo icon.
She's also a podcaster and we love podcasting with other podcasters because it's just so much
easier. Like it's really hard to podcast with someone who doesn't have a podcast. So thank you
for being here. Thank you for having me. You you're also like doing the most you guys are on tour now right
you're doing giggly squad live shows yeah we've been doing live shows which the first one i we
did in philly and i blacked out yeah because i was so nervous both got it and hannah was like
looking at me like sitting next to me and she's like stop stop and then i was like okay that was
just my first one
we're gonna get into it and now it is like I don't know how I never did it before so much fun
I live you literally feel like you're on drugs I know when you get off stage because like the
come down of adrenaline is insane no and it's actually really scary because like in that moment
you understand like how fame is so addicting because you hear people like screaming and
clapping and it's for you and it's like yeah it's it's addicting every
time i walk off stage i look at hannah and i go i am justin bieber leave me alone that is so
fucking funny no it's so much fun i've heard so many good things about your show so if you guys
want to check out where you headed next um we are probably headed to like D.C. next.
And then we're going to announce our New York City show.
Fun.
Okay, I want to come.
Yeah, absolutely.
I'm a giggly girly.
Yeah.
So are you like a big pop culture girly?
I think you are, correct?
You're like a big Kardashian girly, right?
I love Kim.
Okay, good.
Because we have so much Kim content today.
When I sit down with someone new, like I never know how it's going to go.
I forever am a Kim stan.
I feel like you and Craig, like, not to be dramatic, are, like, the Pete and Kim of the
Bravo universe, honestly.
Craig would murder you if you said that.
Why?
Why?
He, like, doesn't understand the whole Pete thing.
He's like, I just, like, don't really, like, vibe with the Kardashians.
And I'm like, it's just weird that I ever thought of marrying you.
That's toxic.
Yeah.
That's extremely toxic. I'm like, I don't love it. Can I just say, it's just weird that I ever thought of marrying you. That's toxic. Yeah, that's extremely toxic.
I'm like, I don't love it.
Can I just say, he's such a good part of the show.
Like the way he was like speaking to Lindsay,
who like really can't be spoken to,
especially when she hits like a certain level in the night.
He's so calming.
And I'm curious if like there's any plans for him
to become like a permanent Summer House cast member.
I feel like he put that hat on
and he was just like i am coachella
the hat was like a moment for craig he was like i will help you on your ayahuasca trip that's
page's influence the hat um no he would never be a full-time summer really no he doesn't understand
like the surveillance part of it it's a lot he's like this is too much yeah and you could
tell austin didn't understand it either when he said he wanted to eat sierra from front to back
oh that's true because i guess and then he would be filming like so much year round because like
southern charm it's a lot and southern charm films for like two hours a day and they're like i'm
exhausted i'm like really have are you gonna be on this season of southern charm yeah a little bit
fuck yes oh my god you're really just like on 1000 bravo shows i really am i also you don't say no I'm like, really? Are you going to be on this season of Southern Charm? Yeah, a little bit. Fuck yes. Oh my God.
You're really just like on 1,000 Bravo shows.
I really am.
I also-
You don't say no to Bravo.
Of course not.
Like if they're like, you're on this now.
You're like, thank you so much.
I'll be there at 7 o'clock.
Yeah.
We got a lot of questions for you, like with the new rebrand of Real Housewives of New
York, if that was ever something you'd be interested in.
I don't think so.
Really?
Well, I don't want to get married yet.
Well, no one on the show is married, so it doesn't matter.
I feel like the housewives are so much more, like we fight about, you made out with him.
Yeah.
And like you said that.
They say horrible things to each other.
Yeah, I feel like they are like life ruining.
Yes, I agree.
They're like, I want you to burn.
Yeah.
And I'm like, well, you don't know about us.
That's actually a fair point.
Like there's actually a lot more at stake.
Even though you would think it would be the opposite, because you're right, the surveillance of it all is like so creepy. It's actually a fair point. Like, there's actually a lot more at stake. Even though you would think it would be the opposite because you're right,
the surveillance of it
is, like, so creepy.
It's so creepy.
And then you get back
to your apartment
and I'll wake up
in the middle of the night
and immediately look
in the corner of my room.
Really?
Yeah, and look for a camera.
And I also think it's weird
how, like, when Lindsay
brought home that, like,
random man and, like,
fucked him, like,
we were literally
watching a sex tape.
Like, it was really invasive.
I think about the person
that, like, sits in our garage and edits it and watches things all night long. Oh, is there, like, literally watching a sex tape like it was really invasive I think about the person that like sits
in our garage and edits it and watches things all night long oh is there like a studio in the garage
yeah there's someone that like sits and like watches us at night and like transcribe like if
we have a fight at like midnight and no one's there yeah there's no camera people there's no
producer so there's someone being like okay she fought about this with her and she said this, this, and this.
Then Lindsay brought someone home
and it's like, yeah.
So I'm always like,
I always want to meet that.
I meet that person every summer.
Unique job.
Oh, that's so interesting.
Yeah.
And then my last question
is always confusion.
And I spoke to you about this
privately on Instagram.
Is the way that you guys
pack up every weekend.
Like I just don't understand
if you're spending
the whole summer there. Like why are you guys having big ass away suitcases that you pull pack up every weekend like I just don't understand if you're spending the
whole summer there like why are you guys having big ass away suitcases that you pull out of your
car up the steps every fucking weekend like just leave it there some people do it differently
so like Amanda and Kyle pack all for their whole summer and then they leave everything there
I pack weekend because what if something happens during the week and you're like I don't have
that pair of shorts and I really need them so it gives me anxiety to leave things I get that for
me I just feel like you're the type of girl with more than one pair of shorts like I literally have
one pair of shorts but I feel like you have many I do leave all my like hair and makeup stuff there
like I have a separate set that I'll leave there. But when it comes to clothes and shoes, I need everything accessible whenever I need it or I'll have a panic attack. Got it. Okay.
I just feel like you would be a girl with so many shoes and accessories. Like you could just leave
them anywhere you wanted. Yeah. But I'm so psycho that like I'll go through a phase where I can
only wear that pair of shorts. Yeah, of course, of course, of course. And have you been to Delaware
yet? I have a few times. Oh my God. Okay. Well, Paige is here
and I'll do everything in my power
to stop talking about her and Craig,
but absolutely no promises
are being made.
And you're going to join me.
We're going to discuss
the past five.
It's also Wednesday,
which means Paige is joining me
for some dear toasters.
I feel like you probably
are really good at giving
relationship advice
to other people.
I pretend that I am.
Yeah, no, by the way,
people are always asking me
for advice.
I'm like, bitch,
I've literally been on
one date in my life
and we got married. I'm either the best dater in the way, people are always asking me for advice. I'm like, bitch, I've literally been on one date in my life and we got married.
I'm either the best dater
in the world
or the worst
because I've literally
only been on one.
So we're going to do our best
to help you guys
through whatever it is
you're going through
and that's Dear Toastmasters
at the end of the show.
But before that,
Paige is joining me
to deliver the fast five stories
that you need to know
before you wake up
and take a bite
out of your morning toast.
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Okay, Paige.
Wow, that was really good.
I talk 6,000 miles a minute.
Okay, so our first two stories it's
little kardashian news because kim's interview on gma that's like making a lot of waves because
she was talking about get your fucking ass up and work um we got another sneak peek last night and
she's talking about pete and so is chris chris is like pete is such a good guy and then kim
kardashian like robin roberts is doing the Lord's work, just asking the
questions.
And she basically said, I mean, I'm a relationship kind of girl for sure, so I wouldn't be with
someone if I didn't plan on spending a lot of time with them.
Obviously, I want to take my time, but I'm very happy and very content.
And it's such a good feeling just to be at peace.
So, like, I want to cry and I'm so happy.
Obsessed.
Isn't it weird?
Like the way I used to think about them, like when we first saw that picture of them on
the roller coaster, I was like, perfect.
Yeah.
Rebound everything she needs.
Love it.
And now I'm like, Pete is a dad.
Like this is everything.
Like he's a stepdad.
No, he's literally a stepdad.
And I love it.
I love it too.
I feel like Pete, I don't know why I have this feeling that like Pete's our friend from
New York.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And he's like made it big.
And we're so happy for him.
Like we're so excited to watch his journey.
100%.
I feel like his mom is like freaking out somewhere and she like wants to get lunch with us and
tell us about it.
Literally the best part of this whole thing is his mom because you know she's like so
happy.
She probably watches Kardashian.
She's just like a regular woman from Staten Island.
She probably like loves the show and like for her her this is the best thing that could ever happen
and pete just brought kim to meet his grandparents in staten island so it's just like it's too much
it's too much and i think tomorrow or someday soon is the red carpet premiere for the keeping
up with the kardashians new hulu show and i feel like that will be like their first red carpet
appearance because it'd be a great promo for the show.
And they're just, like, in this place.
Like, he – I don't even know when he's in New York.
He's supposed to be in New York every Saturday.
Right.
He's definitely not.
He's definitely not.
He's never on SNL anymore.
But I feel like it doesn't matter because what Pete is doing, like, PR-wise
for SNL is just unmatched.
He – I also heard this rumor, I don't know if it's true,
that he manifests – he's, like, a big manifester. Oh, I wouldn't this rumor, I don't know if it's true, that he manifests, he's like a big manifester.
Oh, I wouldn't see that for him.
And I don't want to give like WeWork vibes, you know, like changing your consciousness
and whatever.
But I feel like he is like very goal oriented.
Like who gets on SNL at that age anyway?
I know.
No, you're right.
Like he's just like ahead of his time in a way.
He really is.
Yeah.
I feel like he's going to write a really good book one day i mean i honestly never thought like he could outdo his relationship with
ariana grande because it was psychotic yeah it was so much so fast engaged tattoos the dad's
you know fdny number on her foot like it was so much and now i'm like ariana who i don't know her
i don't even remember that they got engaged and i love that like ariana who i don't know her i don't even remember that they got engaged and i love that
like ariana is like clearly very on board for this because she's really happy she's married now
and she keeps sending kim all of her ariane beauty like there there's no bad blood no we love we love
women supporting women we love we love sending our makeup lines to each other i know we need a
makeup line so i can send it to you and craig craig would
totally wear a tutorial i heard that craig like i i heard that i really tricked craig on april
fools wait did you yeah oh because you said you were which i'm not um and i heard that craig was
like bereft he was speechless and he was like i could never go on her show again wait who did he
say that to he and um austin did a live show at town hall this week oh yeah yeah yeah and apparently
like i was a segment and someone sent me a bunch of people actually sent me a video and they were
like craig was freaking out because he like thought it was real oh my god he's so naive he's
so sweet and you know i love when he doesn't get pop culture stuff i know he's like and honestly i
didn't even think about like the the effect jumeas had on his life. And also on the season
of Summer House. It's so crazy. He's terrified of Dumas. He, he texted me like a month ago and
he was like, did you know that Brad and Angelina broke up? And I was like, oh my God, you're so
cute. It was like 10 years ago. I was like, where have you you been he honestly should keep up with dumois more
um well just back to pete and kim like i am really over the moon overjoyed and i cannot wait to hear
this gma special but there's also a little bit more news because people are quaking um kim
kardashian has introduced pete to north and i feel like of all the people in kim's life like
north is probably the toughest. Yeah, absolutely.
And if you see this picture,
it's paparazzi picture of them driving around in a golf cart North on Pete's lap.
She's in heaven.
She's obviously like in love with Pete.
Yeah.
And it's like,
you thought she was going to be tough,
like with,
with North for she's sour.
Yeah.
Then she's sweet.
I feel like Kim,
you can say whatever you want about Kim,
but I,
in my bones feel like she's a really good mom.
Of course.
Like, I feel like she's not introducing Pete to North if she isn't serious and had even like a small gut feeling that like this wasn't going to be end game.
I feel like she'd be like, you're not meeting my children.
Yeah.
No, Kim is everything.
She's an entrepreneur.
She's a model.
She's really a sex symbol.
She's everything.
But first and foremost, she's a mom and she's like a die-hard like protective mom I agree I don't think
she's just bringing people into the house to meet the kids especially North and so the fact that
North loves Pete like I want to see North like boss Pete around in the new season well like I'm
really confused about what we're gonna get from Kim and Pete on this season. Because a couple weeks ago she said, like, he hasn't been on the show yet.
But, like, they're literally together every day.
So he's, like, living in her house.
And there was a preview that, like, Chris calls Kim out for, like, texting him.
Yeah.
And I'm just like, I need it.
No, and then they were in New York.
I remember they went to Zero Bond.
Like, they've been together so much and all while she's filming.
So he's off camera.
I don't know.
But I do love like when they are together, any paparazzi picture,
she's like laughing her ass off.
Totally.
And Kanye was like, wear this ski mask.
Yeah, literally.
Were you silent or were you silenced?
Right.
A hundred percent.
Like the dichotomy of like the two relationships is like,
this is exactly what she needs.
I feel like there's a college kid somewhere like writing a thesis on it.
There's something there, like 100%.
Yeah.
And I'm just so happy for Kim.
Like she's really like a good time gal.
And I feel like you're right.
She's laughing.
She's having fun.
She's on vacation.
She's at her kids' soccer games.
Like ideal.
Yeah.
Couldn't be happier for her.
Me either.
And I will continue to talk about them until the day I die.
So if anyone has anything they want to say about that, fuck off. Um, next up. I mean, we grew up with the Kardashians.
I can't, I don't even need to begin to justify my obsession. Like all the sisters, all the sisters
obsessed, obsessed. Like I, I, I would literally take a bullet. Like I would. Me too. I would cry
if I met them. Okay. Have you met any of them? No. I met Kim. And how was she?
Like I was being unwell.
So like it was,
it was my fault.
Like the meeting didn't go well
and it was just like really rushed.
Like,
and then I met Khloe
and she is,
she's the one.
Yeah.
She's the one.
Like we were at a wedding together
and like all the Kardashians were there
and they all were like polite,
but they didn't like stay the whole time.
Khloe was the last one on the dance floor,
like drunk with all the games.
Oh my God.
She was being iconic.
I was like, that's my bitch.
Yeah.
She was just everything you wanted her to be and more.
And then like Kourtney and Travis
were like licking tongues in the corner.
I know.
It was unique.
It was a lot.
So they're having a great week
but someone who's not having a great week
is Erika Jayne
and I feel like she thought
she like might have been out of it
but she's back in it.
She's been named in a $50 million racketeering lawsuit.
Sounds great.
She's been labeled as the front woman in the ex-Tom Girardi's alleged fraud scheme
in a $50 million racketeering lawsuit.
So Erica has been named in a new case from Edelson PC,
which is accusing her of using her public platform
to prolong Girardi's firm's alleged scheme.
All right.
That's a stretch.
Okay, that's a lot.
That was a lot for my brain.
Yeah, no, and also I don't really get it.
This is what they're saying.
The victims of Tom's fraud have had to sit back
and watch Erica spend obscene amounts of money
as they had nothing.
This is a giant step forward in obtaining real accountability
for what the largest criminal racketeering enterprise
in the history of plaintiff's law.
It's time for her to stop the lies
and start taking some accountability.
So they're basically saying that,
I don't know what they're saying.
That she prolonged it because she was on Housewives.
Right.
I don't really understand.
Because she was trying to like spend all the money and show everyone that she
was so rich.
But wouldn't that have made it go faster because they ran out of money because
she was spending it so much?
Right.
I do feel like this is a stretch.
And honestly,
now watching, do you watch Salt lake city housewives of course so now
watching like the jen shaw of it all i'm like justice for erica jane like they fucking dragged
her and you know what it was her fucking husband it wasn't even her jen shaw didn't get asked one
motherfucking question and it's her it's not even her husband yeah her i just think it's so wild
that we live in a world where like there's housewives that are like going to jail no we're
on our third like we thought the theresa thing was insane i housewives that are like going to jail. No, we're on our third. Like we thought
the Teresa thing was insane.
I mean, it was,
but like Jen Chow
was most likely
will be going to prison
for like more than 20 years.
No, that's terrifying.
And she like sat there
at reunion day
and was just like,
why can't I wear my gloves?
They make my outfit.
And I was like,
Delusion?
Wait, but what if you go to jail?
No, I know.
And do you know that
every single person
that was like put on trial
with her has taken a plea
deal except for her?
I believe it's 30 people have taken a plea deal and she's still going to court because
she thinks she's...
Like the anxiety I would have.
Jail is personally my worst nightmare.
Me too.
We need someone at Summer House to get into a financial crime.
Who do you think it would be?
Who would go to jail for tax evasion?
Probably Austin.
Even though he's not like a cast member.
Or like, yeah, no, Austin for sure.
I feel like Andrea could go for tax evasion.
Just because he was confused.
I didn't know.
Yeah, and they're just like, it's fine.
A hundred percent.
And he's like so handsome and cute and sweet.
He would get there and the judge would be like, it's fine, sweetie.
Just go home.
And be like, you can't go to jail.
You're right.
You're good.
Look at it.
Imagine Andrea in jail.
Like, no.
Oh, the poor thing.
So I really feel like I've personally had enough of the Erika Jayne.
Like, I feel like she's, you know, made it clear that she was not responsible.
I do believe her now.
I didn't believe her in the beginning.
I believe her now.
And this honestly seems like a stretch and a half.
Erika Jayne, I will say this.
When she first started on Beverly Hills hill first of all what's your favorite
franchise i mean it depends on the season because a lot of them are in like lows right now yeah but
it's probably beverly hills and potomac wow okay well i'm really interested that you threw in
potomac in there potomac is the most underrated franchise on the planet people sleep on it it's
so fucking good and mostly because like the bullet I would take for Karen Huger is huge.
Their last season was incredible.
Amazing.
The season before that with the Monique and the Candace.
You know, I'd actually love to get your take on this because as someone who sat in on reunions,
like Andy's job is really to be like completely.
What's the word I'm looking for?
Indifferent.
Like really a middleman.
But he has.
I mean, he's a human he's a
human he has favorites people and like at the reunion with the candace and the monique of it
all like he was so team candace when like yeah candace like was so wrong so it really pissed me
off because i felt like we never got justice like the monique fans because it wasn't a fair reunion
i was team monique yeah of course like we're normal but I'm curious like if you've experienced like the wrath
of Andy when he like wasn't on your side and if you think he has favorites in your show okay when
the first time I ever went on watch what happens I was just a bartender with Hannah I don't Andy
didn't know me from like literally this box of spreads he was like thanks for coming not sure
who you are and but I was so excited I was loved it. I was like, thank you so much. And then I went on again.
Or no, I went to the clubhouse because Craig was on.
And all of a sudden, Andy was like, hi, Paige.
So I attribute anything nice that Andy says about me is because he loves Craig.
He loves Craig.
He loves Craig.
He loves the boys of Southern Charms so much.
Like, Shep, you're 100% right.
And do you feel like he takes favorites on anyone in Summer House?
Like, do you think he is loyal to, like, Kyle and Carl?
I actually feel with our cast, he's very indifferent because, like, he doesn't even care.
Yeah, I actually don't even think he watches.
No, he's like, so what did you do?
You had a contract?
That's weird.
Tell me about it.
Yeah, no, when he was doing Watch How I watch how was i for sierra he like i forget what
exactly it was but he said something that made it clear like he didn't see the most recent episode
because it was like no that's actually the opposite of what happened like so i completely
agree i don't think summer house i actually do think summer house is climbing andy's list of
priorities like i think summer house is the new vanderpump rules wow and i think like in a few
years like we will all look back on this time in summer house and be like oh my god like the way
we look back on like chunky cable knit sweater the jacks era yeah i think that's what
we're gonna feel like about summer house i agree and there's a huge gap because like vanderpump
rules is the worst show on television now and nobody even knows if it's coming back right i
feel like it's going if it does they have to do like a whole they need a rebrand i agree and i
think that's what they like tried to do last season but they like half-assed it they were like
we'll keep so many of the old people while also rebranding. Honestly,
it's just not believable anymore that any of these people work at a restaurant. None of them work
there. Not a single one. So it's silly to me. But Erika Jayne, yes. So I would say, what is your
favorite franchise? So I am between Beverly Hills and New Jersey. Jersey. I didn't watch last night,
I am between Beverly Hills and New Jersey.
Jersey?
I didn't watch last night, but Jersey's so good.
I just feel if you're looking at the longevity of each franchise,
Jersey has performed pretty much every year.
Yeah, there were those like dark years with Amber and those twins when Teresa was in jail.
Oh my God, I forgot about the twins.
I could never forget about the twins because they were like so desperate.
And then Amber and her crazy ass fucking husband.
But Teresa was in jail.
So like it was a tough time for everyone, you know, which is so crazy.
The fact that like the first episode of like a recent season of Jersey is
Teresa coming home from jail is psychotic.
Psychotic.
Did you also see she's like being outspoken saying she doesn't know she's
going to film her wedding?
Yes.
You're a Bravo Liberty and you are dating a Bravo Liberty.
Would you have a filmed wedding?
Okay.
This is like a very interesting conversation in my home
because Craig and I talk about it all the time
because there are certain things that people like expect you to do.
It's like, well, we've seen your whole relationship.
How dare you?
I feel like you need privacy and like do this.
But when Craig like initially asked me to be his girlfriend,
we were off camera.
And when he did that, I always thought like, but when Craig like initially asked me to be his girlfriend, we were off camera. And I,
when he did that,
I always thought like,
wow,
I'm so happy you did this off camera because I'm a girl.
Yeah. And there would have been a thought in my mind that was like,
did he just do it to have a moment?
A hundred percent.
And then the first time he told me he loved me was off camera,
but like Southern charm was filming,
but we were like,
like in those moments
right so like having these little moments where it's just me and him i really cherish just because
there's so many times where people are like what oh my god you were laying in bed and like what
like what's going on you're just like of course and even though you are a reality star like you
are entitled to a good amount of privacy and like I don't subscribe to that notion that just because you're on a reality show, like.
But Teresa's different.
A hundred percent.
Like, Teresa needs to show her wedding.
Obviously.
Nobody cares about my potential wedding over Teresa's.
We care a lot.
But I completely agree.
Teresa's different for a multitude of reasons.
And she doesn't get privacy.
Yeah.
Sorry.
We watched you go to jail.
We can watch you walk down the aisle.
We've seen literally every moment.
Like, it's just, it's not happening.
No, not at all.
She's also been on for, like, 20 years.
No, and the show, like, literally saved her life in so many ways.
Like, there's no way.
Like, she has to do it.
Okay, well, we've got more news about other people being billionaires who are not me,
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for a $25 credit Thuma.co slash toast code toast okay so Rihanna Jay-Z and Kanye have finally made
like the coveted uh Forbes billionaires list for the first time each which I find really shocking that Jay-Z wasn't on wait yeah I always
thought Jay-Z was like the richest one of all of them me too so Rihanna who was
officially certified as a billionaire in August 2020 thanks to her beauty and
lingerie empire landed at that's this is this is so crazy she landed at number
1729 on the list so Rihanna's, and I think it's America, the like 1,700th richest person, which is
so crazy because she's so rich.
I mean, I've been dating for like 15 years.
I haven't met one of those people.
And that's annoying for me.
Kanye, who has disputed his overall value with Forbes, like they're always fighting
about how much he's actually worth.
I love when celebrities get into fights with like major brands. It's always the Kardashians fighting with Forbes about like what
their true value is. Like they said Kanye was worth two billion and he says
he was worth seven. And that's like a really big disparity. It's not nothing.
He's number 1513 thanks to obviously Yeezy and Gap. And then oh and Rihanna is
the first billionaire from Barbados, which is really cool.
And I'm curious, if you had a billion dollars, what would you do with it?
This is my favorite game to play.
Like, if you won the lottery and you got one billion with a B, how would you spend it?
And if you want some inspiration, this is what I say I would always do.
So, unfortunately, we live in a greedy motherfucking country, so I'd have to give 500 million to taxes.
About.
It's about 50%.
So I have 500 million automatically I'm putting 250 million dollars
and like a really high yielding um something like investing yeah so that I never really have to work
again but my money will earn money for me right and then the other 250 million I would say about
50 of that is going to go to different homes like I'm going to buy like a beach house right a
mountain house a penthouse so I think 50 million is enough for like three homes
yeah cars etc maybe a boat the other 200 I have left like I will be giving to friends and family
not all of it maybe maybe maybe five million I'll be giving no okay I'll give another 50 to like
friends family another you know 25 to charity oh that's fucked up okay maybe like another 50 to
charity um and then just like spend the rest like just like bathing in the in the money being really
happy about the money i'm spending on whatever i want like going like on vacations getting like
the best table at every club in the city like everyone knows you normal things yeah i this is
like the best miss usa question i would love to see how those bitches answer it.
Right, and if somebody forgets charity, like you're done.
You're done.
Okay, first thing I would do is call my dad.
Because I would just be like, what's happening here?
And then he would be like, you probably have to give it all to me and I'll figure it out.
No, I think I would like call my family and be like, how much do you guys need?
Let's take that right off the top.
So smart.
Then I'm calling like a really good financial planner and being like, please don't steal
all my money.
That's the tough part.
So I feel like you have to have two.
Yes.
Because like, so one can check in on the other one unless they both conspire against you.
No, you should have two, but they shouldn't be in communication with each other because
in case one of them turns out to be corrupt, at least you still have some money left. Okay. So we're getting two. They don't know each other. On opposite sides of the planet. Yeah. They in communication with each other because in case one of them turns out to be corrupt at least you still have some money left okay so we're getting two they don't know
sides of the planet like they don't know each other one in israel and one in america so far
one's in so they'll never meet um and then yeah i'm doing homes i want like a huge yacht like i
want like a yacht that people are like fuck yeah like anna delvey tries to get on yeah exactly and then i
need to fly private for the rest of my life of course so do you think if you had let's say 500
million dollars you would buy a plane or just be like a charter girly oh my god because it's really
expensive to have a plane i would think i would call net jets and be like let's figure something
out right and like have everything pink and velvet inside right i don't really understand the need unless you have like bezos money right you really don't need your own plane
it's so expensive to like you know the staff and the hangar when like whenever you want to go
somewhere you just drop 250 grand for like a big ass plane and they're all really nice that's the
way to go i think so too like kylie and kim like both just got their own planes but and they're
both like billionaires with a b don't you get annoyed that like you would be such a good rich person no you don't you want to hear like how
delusional i am i like will lose sleep over the fact that like the kardashians don't have me in
their life as a friend because like i really i know what they need in a friend for like obviously
someone funny like i'm i bring so much to the table right but i'm also like extremely loyal
and like i know how important family is and like I just know I'm the perfect person to be their friend.
Right.
And it keeps me up at night and I feel sad for them that they'll never have me as that.
And like that's how unwell I am.
I actually agree with that.
Yeah.
And I'm just like, you don't even know what you're missing out on.
Because I feel like they only have Khloe who's funny.
So like their base is just like, yeah, that's funny.
They need more.
They need more comedy
friends no I'm like they don't even know like the value I would bring to their life I gotta and and
it keeps me up at night obviously because I'm sad on what I'm missing out on but I'm actually like
like I feel sorry for them like me too like they're never gonna know what it's like to have
someone as like fucking amazing right and you know what it's their loss it's their jealous
they're just jealous I completely agree and you know what? It's their loss. It's their loss. They're jealous. They're just jealous. I completely agree.
And you know,
Khloe like was the funny one
but I feel like she's kind of
been like broken down
by everyone.
Battered and beaten.
Yeah.
And it's like,
I don't even think she's funny.
Like I don't know her personally.
Like I just feel like the world
has been so mean to her
for so long.
Which I don't get.
I don't get either.
Like people used to be
so mean to her
about the way she looked
and then like she got so,
so thin and so like self-conscious and now people are like you're too skinny you edit your
photos too much and it's like yeah leave this bitch motherfucking alone and the whole tristan
thing i'm like oh my god you guys haven't dated like the worst man in america right please right
like you haven't called your ex i have four on speed dial literally it's so true the hypocrisy
like yeah why the kardashians have to be perfect is beyond me. Yeah.
Alright next story is like very nuanced
and very irrelevant but like I happen to care a lot.
Katie Holmes is showing
off her edgy style
as she got a nose ring.
I love nose rings.
Okay I actually it made me think the first thing I thought
of when I saw this nose ring it made me think of Amanda
Petula who like there could be a
world war and she won't take her nose ring out like she is obsessed and I wanted to ask you if
she wore her nose ring to her wedding yes she did you're kidding yep she wore her nose ring to her
wedding but she's the kind of person that like I never notice it in pictures by the way I agreed
like I didn't really notice she had a nose ring and then I think I maybe noticed a couple weeks
so and I'm like oh yeah she's always had it like it's not so it's so in your face yeah
it's like there are certain girls that like like you could see a girl walking down the
street and she's fully sleeve tatted and you're like she looks so cool yeah if I did that
they'd be like what's going on right lock her up and nose rings I feel like are the
same like with Amanda I'm like you're so artsy and you like love graphic design yeah and
like you're cool
and she can do it.
Yeah,
no,
I agree.
And I didn't really see this
for Katie Holmes,
but Katie Holmes
has been through so much.
Like the Tom Cruise of it all,
the Scientology of it all.
Like if homegirl wants
to get a nose ring,
like do it.
She had a face tattoo
just to reclaim her independence.
Yeah.
I'm so fascinated
by Scientology.
You kind of look like katie holmes anyone
ever tell you that no but thank you like young katie holmes thank you it's totally a compliment
remember when she dated the guy from the restaurant yes of course i mean that was a that was a time
period that i really lived for you're right like katie holmes has really existed in so many
different lifetimes like the dawson's Creek of it all yeah the Tom Cruise of
it all I feel like Surrey then the Surrey Cruise of it all is going to like date Mason Disick okay
Surrey in if the way I see Surrey growing up is like being like a full socialite and like giving
Taylor Momsen she she's Blair Waldorf yeah I think I think that like we aren't ready as a society
for the looks that Suri's going to serve.
Absolutely.
And her name is so unique.
Do you remember when like the country was quaked down by the name Suri?
Like people couldn't believe it.
I was like 11.
I was like, Suri.
Suri's going to the Met Gala.
Oh, a hundred percent.
Even though I do think like her mom is really scarred by fame.
Yeah.
And I think Suri maybe saw that firsthand and like will actually not be like a famous
girly.
Interesting.
Yeah.
That's what I think.
Like she might be one of those like, but that's going to make her even cooler.
Right.
Like she doesn't even know she's hiding from it, but it's making her so much bigger.
Like I'm already obsessed with her.
Like I look to see what she wears.
Yeah, of course.
Does she have an Instagram?
I don't know, but I saw them at Pastis one time and I
there are certain people that you'll see in New York
City where I get legitimately so
starstruck. Katie Holmes was one of them. Of course.
She's an institution. Yeah.
And I
spend more time than I care to admit thinking about the Tom
Cruise of it all. Yeah. Because he's such a
fucking weirdo. And I really think about
what he did to Nicole Kidman. Yeah.
Which is very similar to what he did to Katie Holmes in that you know Nicole Kidman was like
the Scientology bullshit is not for me yeah I'm gonna go and then he like made
all of their kids like shun her and a lot of that some of her kids talk to her
some of them don't get all because of Scientology and it's so fucking whack
and I just like I have always wanted to walk into the Scientology building and
do not and get a pamphlet
just to see what they say like i watch so many leave like do not go i watch so many documentaries
i find it so clear remedy is a national hero yeah she so i just did a show in clearwater florida
which is like by tampa but it's like this kind of small beach town and it's the headquarters
of scientology so we were's the headquarters of Scientology.
So we were at the Capitol Theater, which is literally around the block from like the C-Org
is what I call it.
Yes, yes, yes.
The big property.
When I tell you that the town is barren, like every shop is closed.
It's so, it's a war zone.
It's the scariest thing.
It's like this dead ass town.
And then the beach is a couple blocks over.
So like a couple blocks over, it's like Poppet. It's like this dead ass town. And then the beach is a couple blocks over. So like a couple blocks over, it's like pop it.
It's like St. Petersburg area.
Okay.
But that town that's right by, it's empty.
It literally looks like a movie set.
Like how there's no windows.
And do they all like live there?
So yeah.
And so if you work for the Sea Org, you dress basically like a flight attendant.
Okay.
And so when we were like walking into the venue, like the only people on the street,
they were dressed like literally like Scientology Airlines like it was crazy that's terrifying it was so
scary I was like we drove out that night I'm like we are getting the fuck out of here like it's
creepy I went to see the Book of Mormon last night so good well I slept through the first half what
it's so good I know Craig was so mad at me did Craig stay up up? He loves musicals. I think that falling asleep, not to put you on blast, in a Broadway show is peak disrespect.
Like, did you have good seats?
Like, did they see you?
Great seats.
And I've never stayed awake through any Broadway show.
That's psychotic.
Like, they're so loud and bright.
Like, how?
I have slept through, what's the one with the Wizard of Oz?
Wicked.
Wicked.
Slept through it.
That's disgraceful.
Hamilton.
Fell asleep for like 15 minutes.
Never saw Hamilton, so I can't speak to it.
Aladdin.
Fell asleep.
Yeah, Ben Sade said it wasn't good.
Um, and Book of Mormon.
Fell asleep.
But you're missing out.
Book of Mormon is so funny.
It is very funny.
Like, I, it's the only show I've gone to and I physically have laughed out loud.
Okay, like the fact that like you and Craig are going to Broadway shows like I'm gonna die.
Craig loves going to them.
He does?
Yeah.
Craig is a...
He gets like so jacked up.
Is the musical theater girly?
He loves going and like getting the wine at like the bar and getting all the snacks.
It's an experience.
Yeah he loves the whole thing.
Did he get dressed up?
Um he wore a blazer.
And he literally got home and he was. No one dresses up to like go.
They don't to go to the theater anymore.
It's not right.
It's not right.
And then we started talking in British accents.
And I was like, no one has any cooth.
Oh my God.
I'm so speechless from that.
We should do a double date.
Do not tease me.
Because like we will be there.
I'll be there 15 minutes early.
We went to Quality Bistro before.
So good.
So good.
There's a lot of good restaurants in like the theater district.
And we just watched there.
Then you make it like a night.
Did you take like a pedicab home?
No, we didn't.
Fuck.
That would have been cute.
Yeah.
Maybe if you had your own TV show, you guys, they would have made you.
Maybe if we filmed our wedding, they would have let us.
Yeah, maybe.
Okay.
Final story is a little tech news because we're just like such a well-rounded show.
We talk about all the things.
Twitter is working on an edit button.
So as any true blue Twitter user knows, the things. Twitter is working on an edit button. So as any true blue
Twitter user knows,
the divide over
the social network
adding an edit button
is the deepest
ideological ravine
of our time.
I'm at techcrunch.com.
Relax.
So I'm thinking about
adding an edit button
which is like crazy.
Definitely something
I could have used
in high school
when I was tweeting
offensive things
about literally everyone.
And I just feel like
it's a little late.
Okay, wait.
But also,
did you hear that Elon Musk basically, like, bought Twitter?
We reported on that yesterday.
Basically, he became, because it's a publicly traded company, he became the biggest shareholder.
He just bought billions of dollars of shares, and now he owns 9% of the company.
And then Twitter was, like, open to working with him, so they gave him a board seat.
So does that mean he, like, walks in and he's like, I want this, this, and this changed?
And, like, is he behind the edit button?
So I don't know if he's behind it, but I do imagine having a board seat comes with a lot of power.
So if you wanted something done, like having a board seat would be a great place to start.
So you can go back to previous tweets, click edit and be like, no, I actually love Jay-Z.
Right.
And like, I guess it probably would say edited.
Like on Instagram, if you edit a caption, it does say edited.
It does?
Yeah.
Really small.
Wait, I don't love that.
No, I know.
I've also never noticed that.
Because I always have a typo.
So every single one of my captions are edited.
Well, one of my girlfriends will always text me and be like, you should have made the caption
this.
And I'm like, fuck.
That literally just happened to me.
100%.
I'm like, you're so right.
That's so much funnier.
I'm like, fuck.
That literally just happened to me.
A hundred percent.
I'm like, you're so right.
That's so much funnier.
Also sometimes like if you post something with like a mediocre caption and like all like podcast fans are like really funny and smart.
Yeah.
So they're always like dropping hilarious comments.
And I'm like, literally, bitch, I'm taking that from a caption.
I'm like, I'm literally feeling that.
Thanks, girl.
I love you.
So I just, for me, and this is what we were talking about yesterday, like Twitter as a
social media platform is so irrelevant.
Yeah.
I don't really feel like any update they make is going to change the
landscape of social media moving forward i just like don't care about twitter do you tweet like
no you don't live tweet your show or anything no rebel liberties love to do that especially
the housewives i feel like i would only ever go on twitter to like maybe i'll follow some
comedians that tweet something funny or like maybe look up a pop culture story.
But like I don't care what like diplomats are tweeting.
No, I know.
I don't care.
It's just not my personal niche.
And I find like the only time I really use Twitter is like when there's breaking news.
Like yesterday there was like a Joe Rogan death hoax.
Like they're always doing that on Twitter.
And that's why when like them people die,
like I remember when there were reports that Kobe died.
I'm like, there's no way.
There's always these hoaxes on Twitter.
So it's like, you don't believe it.
I feel like it's like the girls that kept diaries in middle school and I was just never a diary girl.
No, and I'm not really like, like, like, like well read.
Like, you know what I mean?
At all.
I don't really know how to like,
the fact that I put a book together is beyond mind. Like, because like I can't even put together like a tweet that like makes sense
I literally read half a book this year and it was what book oh that's so sweet we actually have it
over here but meaning to read it Craig came out with a book Craig came out with a book and there's
literally two chapters about like him and his ex-girlfriend I was like I feel like is it rude
if I don't read it I feel like Naomi yes and i felt like i was actually reading his diary i was like i feel like i shouldn't read this you
should like tell me if you want to tell me what is your relationship with with naomi like she is
first of all she's stunning stunning obsessed like in person like obviously she's studying on
instagram but like in person she's even prettier um she's very nice very lovely like you know he
she is his ex-girlfriend so it's not like
best friends i'm not gonna be like oh my god what do you think about the sex you know like did he do
this you know like i'm not gonna do that but like i can be in a room with her and it's like totally
normal and like fine but well actually i was reading some stuff about craig's book where he
was talking about that um you know at the beginning of the show on southern charmm yeah he was having like an Adderall problem which I thought was really
interesting and I think it happens to a lot of reality stars absolutely and he was well I was
like looking at pictures from when he was first on I was like he's so skinny yeah and I was like
and I feel like as girls and like going to college we know exactly what that is right
no one told you come on oh also one more question I
logistically had to ask you before we keep going it appears as though when you guys wake up in the
morning after a party everyone cleans except for you and I just want to know like is that a bad
edit or are you just not cleaning so like both but also people are so mad about it I got that
question like a thousand times and I will take if that is the one thing that like they're taking bad from me from the show,
it's like,
she's lazy.
I'm like totally fine.
Yeah.
Um,
I don't help clean or set up as much as everyone else,
but like I do do it,
but some people are like so crazy.
Does it bother the other housemates?
No,
they don't give a shit.
Like I feel like a lot of TV shows,
like specifically when I think back on Jersey Shore,
so many of the fights were like,
we did dinner, you guys have to do the dishes.
Always like housework was becoming...
We have a cleaning person.
So that was the other question.
It's like, do you guys...
Because it gets really clean after the weekend.
Yeah, when we leave on Sunday,
someone comes in during the weekend.
And they clean it.
And they clean it.
And do you guys think that when Bravo puts a deposit down
for the house that they get it back? Absolutely not it. And like, do you guys think that when Bravo puts a deposit down for the house that they
get it back?
Absolutely not.
No.
Because when Amanda was talking about like the ripped.
I don't think so.
Yeah.
No.
But like we.
Yeah.
I don't know any of like those logistical things, but just from like attending a frat
party a few times in my life, I don't think we get.
I don't think so either.
A deposit back.
Me neither.
Okay. Well, those were the fast five.
Congratulations on making it through your first fast five.
Thank you.
Thank you so much for doing that with me.
And I'm going to hold you ransom for 20 more minutes because today is Wednesday.
And that's Dear Toasters.
So if you ever want to write in, it's deartoasters at gmail.com.
We'll always keep it anonymous for you.
If you're having any issues at work, at home, with your boyfriend, whatever it is.
You know, your boss is hoarding water bottles in the basement.
I don't know. Shit happens. Write in to us, deartoasters.gmail.com
and we'll do our best to guide you through. We're just two girls trying to
do our best. So Dear Toasters is brought to you by Catalina Crunch. If you're
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Okay.
First up, someone's writing in.
Paige and Claudia, bless you both for helping me.
When this scenario came up, I knew I needed to write in immediately.
The drama.
I love it.
You are like a Danielle Steele novel.
We are very happy.
Oh, no, sorry.
I skipped a line.
I'm an East Coast girly, but relocated to the West Coast, and I met my now husband here we are very happy in california but it's expensive my parents has
my husband's parents have a few rental homes in san diego san diego and they offered to sell us
one of them under market value the house they want to sell us is beautiful modern and it has a view
of the water but it's next door to them my husband is considering it and i am naturally most concerned
about having any boundaries with living so close to them my My husband is considering it, and I am naturally most concerned about having any boundaries
with living so close to them.
My husband's dad also travels quite a bit for work,
and I notice his mom reaches out a lot when his dad is gone
and he wants us to keep her company
so I can imagine what she would expect with us next door.
Part of me feels like this could be a recipe for disaster,
but I'm curious if you think differently.
Thank you so much in advance.
Well, my first thought is,
you said they have a lot of rental homes,
so are any of the other ones available that aren't next door to them right because that could be
the problem solver okay i might have an unpopular opinion i would love it really i would love it
because once they start having kids yes get right on over to your grandma's house that's number one like for sure get out of my house yeah go go so I love that also I love my mom so much so like if she was next door
okay but what if it was Craig's mom like you love her even more yeah no I actually agree
I guess it depends on what the relationship is with your in-laws like if you fucking hate them
like this is obviously not good.
But if you,
I agree.
First of all,
like if you have kids and your in-laws live next door,
like goodbye.
You're done.
I have always said to Craig,
I'm sending my kids to Delaware for the first five years of their life.
Yes.
Like learn how to be nice,
normal people.
And then we'll take them back.
A hundred percent.
I've been thinking about that a lot lately.
Cause you know,
Jackie just had a baby and like,
I love my in-laws and I'm like actually feeling so grateful for them. Cause I'm like, you know, Jackie just had a baby. And, like, I love my in-laws. And I'm, like, actually feeling so grateful for them.
Because I'm, like, you know, when I have a baby, like, here.
You go.
Help.
When I go on tour, like, I drop my dog off.
And they love Theo.
Yeah.
And they're super, like, they're excited.
It's not, like, a burden for them.
Right.
Even though I feel like I'm burdening them.
So, like, this could be great when I have a kid.
Like, goodbye.
Like.
Also, I feel like, okay, yes.
If the mother's husband is, like, going away, yeah, you're going to, she's going to come
over for dinner and stuff.
But, like, she's not going to, like, walk into the bedroom when you guys are, like,
having sex.
Yeah.
You really paint a good picture of what this woman's like.
Because she might be like that.
So, like, if that's the case, hard no.
But I don't know.
I'm a sucker for a bargain on a home.
Yeah.
And, you know, in every home buying experience, there's a give and a take, you know?
Right.
And you're getting an undervalued, under market value house.
And so what?
You got to have dinner with your in-laws once a month.
Yeah.
It's not a big deal.
And you have a babysitter next door.
I know.
Free daycare is not something you should take lightly.
But maybe she's not even thinking about having kids yet, you know?
I don't know.
That's true.
That's true.
I think it's fine.
I think it's fine also.
And, like, if it's really not
fine you make something up and you move yeah 100 we have a rat problem like yeah something's going
on yes once you live there like will they take offense when you do end up moving like if you
move then it's like you have to explain to them you know yeah i mean there is a potential huge
family fight stirring that we're like we'll put a camera crew in there just so we can watch it.
No, I know.
But it does have water views.
So.
Yeah.
Hello.
In San Diego.
Like, that's hard to find.
Yeah.
I think you should just take the house.
Like, also, they should really just give it to you.
But it's fine.
Yeah.
All right.
Hello, girlies.
I'm in a bit of a pickle.
Our best friend just got engaged to our other best friend.
His name is Maverick.
Maverick threw a surprise engagement party for her with an open bar.
We all traveled
across the country.
What a name.
Well, okay,
so it's actually
a reference
to my New York Times
bestselling book.
When I talked about
the first boyfriend,
like the first boy
I ever loved
when I was in the 7th grade,
his name was something
but I had to change a name.
So the publisher was like,
you need to come up
with a name.
And I'm like,
I got really flustered
because it was like
last minute.
I was like,
Maverick. Because the boy's original name started with an M so I wanted to keep it similar. So I was like you need to come up with a name and i'm like you came up i got really flustered because it was like last minute i was like maverick because the boy's original name started with an m so like i wanted to keep it similar so i was like mav i don't know where the fuck it came from
i kind of love it every time someone writes in they name their fake boyfriend maverick it's like
so embarrassing okay so maverick threw a surprise engagement party um with an open bar we all
traveled across the country bought flights hotels gas hotels, gas, etc. The party was amazing.
Our best friend was so happy.
Fast forward a week later, we receive a group email from Maverick asking if we could contribute
money to the food, drinks, and cost of the space he rented for the party.
Keep in mind, half of the people in attendance at the party weren't even on the email chain,
which begs the question, why are we paying for other people's food and alcohol as well?
You can say we are a bit surprised.
We just feel it's a little tacky since we traveled to the destination
and he's asking for the money
for the party that he planned.
Plus, the amount he's asking
is way more than what we individually ate
slash drank while in attendance.
What are your thoughts on this?
Do you think we should contribute money?
Should we ignore the email
and pretend we never saw it?
Do we just continue to contribute
the amount of money that we feel we spent?
Are we the cheap ones if we don't pay anything?
Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
We promise to follow up with an update once we've solved this pickle.
Sincerely, two confused toasters who are potentially the cheap ones.
You are not cheap at all.
Literally, this is the most chutzpah dick thing I've ever heard in my fucking life.
The audacity.
The audacity.
Do not respond to this email.
No.
Ignore. Someone else's life choices are not your responsibility like you show up to a party as a guest and you spent a lot
of money to be there like fuck off also a surprise engagement party is no different than like a
surprise birthday party yeah it could have been her birthday and he was throwing her a party would
he have asked you for money for that no and. And the thing is like, we are all just trying to survive and like live,
live within our,
live within our means.
I'd love to know how much he was asking for.
I know.
So if you like overspent,
it's really not on your friends.
Right.
To help you out of that pickle.
Like that was a life choice.
We're adults.
You're getting married.
Like these are things you have to learn.
Financial health.
Yeah.
Responsibility.
Like that's on you,
bitch.
Like,
sorry. No. Also, i just feel like that if you couldn't afford it then don't throw the party
right or like make some cutbacks you know or don't have to be open bar right if i'm showing up to a
party like i want to drink and so if i have to pay for one i'll pay for it yeah but i hate going
something that's wedding related that's not open bar okay but I do have to say it's an
engagement party not a wedding so I do believe a wedding should be open bar and like for me that's
my priority so I would cut budget on other things I'd have no flowers right no flowers like no dj
no anything no lights just for the bar because that's my priority right so for an engagement
party I do think you can get away with a cash bar? I do. Yeah.
But this is so tacky.
Yeah.
So he's worried about being tacky,
so he does an open bar,
but then he's not worried about being tacky
and he'll email all of his friends being like,
hey, can you buy me $100?
Like, no.
And I feel like it was more than $100.
Of course.
And she said he wrote like half the party.
But then it's like,
how do you decide which people should give money
and which people shouldn't?
Also, like,
then when all of those people get invites to the wedding, they're going to fuck this are we gonna pay for it no and the weddings are being a guest of someone at a wedding
is so expensive if it's a destination wedding you spend so much money yeah on flights hotels and
then the gift if you're in the bridal party you have the bridal shower it's like so much money
you spend on other people's wedding yeah so to ask for even more to contribute to like the fund for
the engaged party is like really chutzpah like I don't like it like they're gonna
have to go to her shower they're gonna have to get her wedding yeah just being a wedding guest
in general is like really pricey yeah don't invite me don't invite me that's the thing it's like I
people don't know the favor they do me when they don't invite me to their wedding like Hannah's
not having a wedding party and the first thing I said was bless you god bless like thank you so much no and unless i'm like your
best friend or family yeah i usually will reply no to a wedding because i don't want to take up
space you get charged per person i'm like yeah i'm not really happy for this couple so like when
the pandemic happened i got chopped from so many weddings i was like god bless love this is amazing
amazing like i just don't really like weddings unless i'm like
really invested in the couple yeah then it's like i'm taking up space from someone else who could
have been there and it's pricey the more people you have yeah i feel like i'm always doing people
a favor when i say now i'm just sitting there really judging everything being like i would
never have that yeah no of course and i'm always sitting like my wedding was better my feet hurt
like the steak is gross like can we go home now yeah it's always like how much time has passed
that it's then an appropriate time to leave because you can't leave too early right and like
jewish weddings are really long oh yeah jewish weddings are very well you have you guys have a
very long ceremony yes well you can get it done quickly my ceremony was about an hour yeah um and
my favorite part of the wedding is um one of my friend's mom like took this great video of like
me and ben smashing the glass and kissing.
So she sent it to me a week after the wedding
and I was so excited and I'm listening.
She's filming and finally everyone gets up
and stands once you kiss.
And one of Ben's friends in the background is like,
my God, that was so fucking long.
That's amazing.
I love that.
It's like the best video.
It's true.
It was long.
I love Jewish weddings because when you're doing the ceremony, your family's up there. Yes. I love that. It's like the best video. It's true. Like it was long. I love Jewish weddings because when you're doing the ceremony, your family's up there.
Yes.
I love that.
I think it's, all your immediate family's like under the chuppah, which I think is nice
too.
I think that's really nice.
Yeah.
Actually, I love Jewish weddings, but they are long.
Like that's just a fact of life.
But they are very fun.
Very fun.
And like lots of liquor.
My most fun weddings have been Jewish weddings.
Yeah.
No.
And like they're, in my opinion, the perfect balance of like really meaningful in the beginning and then like diabolical at the end.
Okay, so I don't remember what advice we gave you, but do not fucking answer that email.
Third and final one.
I've been dating my boyfriend for two and a half years.
Let's call him Craig.
Okay.
We currently live together.
Everything has gone so well.
He's a PJOM, which stands for precious gem of a man.
He treats me like a princess, and I know we will get married one day, and we speak about it constantly. His family is amazing, loves me so well. He's a P-Jom, which stands for precious gem of a man. He treats me like a princess and I know we will get married one day and we speak about it constantly. His family's
amazing, loves me so much. I love them, yada, yada, yada. I thought my family felt the same
way about my boyfriend, but last weekend with my mom, she asked me about my Easter plans.
And we don't really do anything for Easter and I had agreed to go with my boyfriend to his grandma's.
My mom flipped out on me and said, just so I know, just so I know, you'll
probably be doing whatever Craig wants for the rest of his life. And this girl says, I was so
taken aback and confused because I have a great relationship with my mom. Her opinion means so
much to me. And she accused me of spending all my time with my boyfriend and his family and then
falsely accused him of not wanting me to spend time with my own family. She then specifically
brought up a time where I had gone to my aunt's house with my entire family. Everyone was drunk, having a good time. It was almost 11 o'clock. We'd been there for hours
and I was borderline blackout, pretty much blackout. And I don't remember leaving. My boyfriend
made me leave because I was wasted. And now my mom was like looking back on that and took it as my
boyfriend trying to control me and made me leave my aunt's house early, even though I don't get to
see them often. My mother then said so when you wonder why we
don't care for Craig that's one of the reasons. I'm absolutely devastated about this entire thing.
I haven't spoken to my mom since Saturday and it's now Tuesday. I haven't spoken to my boyfriend
about this. I know he would be heartbroken. I just can't ever imagine my boyfriend's family
speaking about me in this way. I have no clue what to do. What do I say to my mom? Do I tell
my boyfriend? Any advice on how to mend the situation would be the greatest help sincerely a toaster with mommy issues sounds like your mom's really
toxic honestly wait it sounds exactly like her mom knows that she's gonna marry this guy and
she's kind of like losing her baby and this is like her trying to salvage freaking out about it
yeah that's true but like how do you fix this this is insane no I literally changed my name and move yeah no I
know it's like the worst thing ever like family infighting like you never want to be a part of
that um and it sounds like Craig is a great guy and his name is Craig so I got back at a bay I
feel like you also can't tell Craig this no no because then in his mind forever it'll always be
like oh her mom even if things are going well oh her mom doesn't like actually like me do not tell
him like figure it out on your own I feel like she has to talk to her mom and then for like maybe a couple weeks
do some family things with her family i know but then it's like you're rewarding your mom for her
toxic behavior that's true i know i'm just like so stubborn like if you're like this your mom is
wrong right you have such a respect for your mom for two years and you live with him like what did
she think right now it's all now suddenly you don't like him yeah like this is the conversation
you have when you just meet someone i think she has to have a real conversation with her mom being
and say like are you being serious when you say you don't like him this is annoying because like
we're gonna get married so let's just like iron this out now communication is key and it's hard
to communicate because like you always want to be respectful of your elders. And you really do value and respect your mom.
But you have to be like, you know.
Right.
Obviously, you know Craig's not controlling me.
Right.
Like me going home at 11 from my aunt's house because I'm blacked out isn't me being in a controlling relationship.
It's just me having to go home because you want me to throw up on my aunt's carpet.
Actually, him being really nice.
Yeah, right.
Because nobody wants me to stay here any longer because it's going to turn diabolical.
So talk to your mom. Figure it out. Do not tell any longer because it's going to turn diabolical. So talk to your mom.
Figure it out.
Do not tell your boyfriend because it'll just ruin things moving forward.
Yeah, men are so dramatic.
And they're just so one track mind.
He'll just remember forever the one time your mom didn't like you.
And if you guys are together for 50 years, there's no reason to make it bad.
But thank you for writing in.
Thank you to everyone who wrote in and trusting us with your quandaries.
If you ever want to write in, it's deartoasters at gmail.com.
And if you want to update us on something that we helped you with, like, let us know.
You guys leave us hanging all the time.
Like, just write a fucking email.
Quandary is a great word.
It's pretty much the word I use every time for dear toasters.
And I'm not 100% sure if it's, like, the right one.
So I, like, breeze right by it.
I'm like, your quandaries and your queries.
And I'm like, I don't know if that's the right word.
I think it's like a science podcast.
It's, like, so Game of Thrones.
Quandary. and I'm like, I don't know if that's the right word. I think it's like a science podcast. It's like so Game of Thrones laundry.
Paige, I really can't express my gratitude enough for you for being here.
You are everything of the sort, as we like to say.
I feel the same way about you.
Thank you for even like thinking of me to have me on.
Honestly, you were top of mind and the toasters would have slit my throat if I didn't have you.
And I'm so glad we finally got you on.
You did amazing, sweetie.
Thank you.
Everyone, follow Paige on Instagram for premium fashion content.
Oh, also, do you have a new line coming out with Amazon?
Is that what I saw on your Instagram?
I actually have one today.
And then I have my Amazon Drop is coming out.
So Amazon Drop is like your own line of clothing.
Yes.
Oh, I can't wait.
Yeah.
I have a live today and then my line comes out in May.
That is so sick.
Yeah, I'm excited.
So Fashion Girly, host of the Giggly Squad podcast, available everywhere with Hannah,
who is, remember, you guys here on Friday.
And you're also going on tour, so just follow Paige on Instagram for premium content left,
right, and center.
Thank you so much.
Thank you so much, you guys.
Thank you so much for listening to The Morning Toast, the millennial morning show where we
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So if you're watching this on YouTube, please feel free to subscribe and give this video
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Have an amazing day, everyone.
And we'll see you tomorrow remotely
with Jackie O finally making her return.
Bye.
How do you do that?