The Toast - S5 Ep57: NLOG at MSG(t): Monday, May 9th, 2022

Episode Date: May 9, 2022

Britney Spears Confirms Her Tell-All Book Will Come Out At The End Of The Year (UpRoxx) (20:48)  Priyanka Chopra and Nick Jonas Reveal Baby Girl Spent '100 Plus Days in the NICU' on First Mother's Day (PEOPLE) (30:19)  Sam Hunt's pregnant wife, Hannah Lee Fowler, calls off divorce (Page Six) (33:24)  2022 Kentucky Derby Recap (Need2Know) (37:44)  Meta is opening its first store as VR headsets inch closer to mainstream reality (CNBC) (46:54)  Unburden Yourselves ([e-mail]) (57:06)  The Morning Toast with Claudia (@girlwithnojob) and Jackie Oshry (@JackieOshry) Merch: https://shopmorningtoast.com/ The Morning Toast Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/themorningtoast Girl With No Job by Claudia Oshry: https://www.girlwithnojob.com/book See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Good morning, Millennials! Welcome back to the Morning Toast and happy Monday. Excuse me, oh my god. Hope everyone had an amazing weekend. Hey, Jax, how you durn? Um, durn good. We had an amazing weekend. Beyond. Speaking of amazing weekends, it was such like a long, jam-packed, fun weekend. I'm so tired today, but I'm just riding high on the memories. Yeah, I'm like, I'm in a low if I'm, if I'm, if I'm so tired today but I'm just riding high on the memories yeah I'm like I'm in a low if I'm if I'm not if I'm gonna be honest well what goes up must come down and you were on such a high

so on Thursday night after talking about it for 75 years I performed my final show in New York City at Madison Square Garden Theater and MSG Theater and MSG and Theater. And MSG. T. And it was incredible. I was, first of all, I remember I was in my bathroom, like, before I left for the venue, like, just, like, sitting on the toilet thinking, like, the next time I sit on this toilet, like, this huge milestone will be behind me and I'll be so relieved. Like, I'm so jealous of the girl who's going to be taking a poop tomorrow because she will have accomplished, you know, this huge feat.

Right. And that was kind of my sentiment the whole time. Like, just get it behind me and then we can celebrate. And you can attest to the fact that I was like literally like a wretched wench before the show. Like, I was so fucking nervous. Like, the magnitude of it all really started to hit me. And I was like being actually a monster, like yelling at everyone, like not OK.

I've seen you be more monstrous oh that's good on your like monstrous scale it wasn't off the charts and like you had every reason to be nervous and like it was just people who were bringing bad energy had to go everyone was like everyone's energy was like toxic to me not everyone even like two people yeah but even if they were being fine I was like you are being so toxic like you have to leave but it wasn't me no it wasn't you it wasn't you it wasn't any of the girls no no no it was just boys but everyone was having fun and I was um I was just so excited for it to be done and the second it was done like I fell into a deep dark depression like I am like it's that's it that's the thing about life it's like you get so excited for these things and they're fleeting and then it's all behind you.

And I also think for us, we're always just like waiting for big things to be behind us. Like you don't enjoy the moment. You're just like, I want this to be in the rear view. And then you're like, well, fuck, it's over. No, like looking forward so much to like this. I'm looking forward so much to like taking my bow. Like I miss the whole thing. Right.

You're not looking forward to the event. You're looking forward to the feeling of when it's over. No, exactly. And like the emphasis I put on being done I'm like mad at myself even though like when I was on stage like I really tried to be super present and enjoy every minute of it and like have fun it felt like from the audience that you were having a blast like I don't know how the other shows have gone but it felt like it was never ending like it was such a journey and it was like so long and beautiful and it felt like you were just like enjoying yourself I really really was like once I got out there and like it wasn't as bad as I thought it was gonna be I was like oh

okay like let's do this and I had like literally the most fun of my life and I think I probably delivered my best performance to date like ever um I also did 90 minutes, which I usually go for like 60 to 70. But I was like just taking my time, having fun. Like I really didn't want to leave. Yeah, you were making a meal out of it. I was making a meal. Like I was literally setting up shop. I was moving in.

And it was like we all came to the garden. Like we're in no rush to go home. Right. We have drinks. We have spritz. Like give us a show. And I think that I did. And I'm like so proud of myself.

I'm also so sad. Like I really can't put into words like how I don't think I'll ever be able to capture the electricity of that night. Like your first show, New York City, Madison Square Garden. My hair and makeup looked amazing. Like I looked snatched. It was just, it was the perfect storm of perfection. It was the perfect storm of perfection.

And going into the night, I knew it was going to be a big night for so many reasons like obviously n log at msgt and that is major it's my first night out as a new mom and it's your biggest crowd yet but I and I knew that I would be overwhelmed because like everything makes me emotional these days and true to form it did but like walking out the toasters were bigger and better than ever I felt so proud of you. Like, I can't even explain. I know that like we built this community together and to see the toasters out was like iconic,

but like you go out there every night. Like you put yourself out there. You started a second tour after COVID. People didn't know if they were going to live shows. Like the COVID wave was so up and down for us. And like to see it all come together. And the last time I was out really was the Beacon Show. And like this was even bigger.

Triple the size. Dare I say like the crowd even, there was more fervor and zest. And I feel like everyone there like knew how big of a deal the night was like for you. And even for me, just like having birthed something and now going to, like, it was just, it was overwhelming. I was so moved by the whole thing. I was so proud of you by the whole thing I was so proud of you you were so fucking funny when teacher smiles teacher is happy

when teacher frowns teacher is sad I literally am so excited for Jackie to start using quotes Jackie loves to quote my previous show Disgraced Queen and now that you have new material that makes me so happy and just to piggyback off of what you said, like, I think no matter what, like, playing a show in front of 6,000 people when you started doing comedy four years ago, like, I was so proud of myself. But I think why it felt so much better is because, like, we've been knocked down so many fucking times. We have rebuilt this business more than once.

Right. And so just to, like, accomplish things when it really a lot of times feels like so many of the odds are stacked against you like it feels even more good more accomplishing because it wasn't easy like nothing in life is easy but I feel like sometimes things are harder for us like I really and I'm sure everyone feels that way but like that is how I feel sometimes so to see like and also we sit in here there's four of us in this room right that. That's the thing. It's like. The personification of your work in real life is jarring. Yeah. Because we sit here and we really talk to each other.

Tons of people are watching, but we don't feel that every day. So to see it in real life, it was so overwhelming. And like, there's no better energy than toaster energy. 100%. At MSG. And the venue was so huge. There were so many people. I took a video and like the crowd never ends. No it was so big and you know what usually like when I do soundcheck we test the

lighting and I don't like it to be so dark because you know I want to see the people but when we did soundcheck I was like I don't want to see one foot in front of me because if I see how many rows of people are stacked up like I will cry so it was pitch for me I know Shannon Ford and Tayshia were sitting in the front row because Shannon was like I want to come to your show I'm like great how many tickets do you need she's like are you kidding and then she sent me a screenshot she brought front row seats I'm like bitch what are you doing let me give you my I get free seats like let me get she's like no I want to support so she was in the front row in the middle and I didn't even see her

like because I made it so bright for me that like you can't see anyone. And I'm so glad that I did because when I bowed and finished the show, they turned the lights on for me to see everyone. And I was like, oh my, like that's how many people were. Like, thank God I didn't know. I would have done such a bad job if I could really grasp the magnitude of how many people were in that room. Yeah. 6,000.

That's insane. I feel that completely. It was so many people. So many people. And there was also a Rangers game going on that night and like the Rangers fans walking through the lobby like seeing the toasters they were like what is going on I'm like what are you doing here like this is disgusting and disrespectful actually really kind of rude of the Rangers to have a game um the night

that I was performing no but there was like extra cheers you could hear them cheering I hope they I'm assuming they won yeah they did they did so it was a big night for me it sounded hearty it was a big night and then also when we were leaving the venue like in um our car and we were leaving through like you know the back artist entrance you could see all the rangers fans like really thinking there were rangers in our car and we didn't want to take the window down and just ruin it when I pulled up um there were like so many fans on behind barricades like waiting just wanting to take pictures of each player showing up. My window was open and they're like, who the fuck is this fat bitch? Is she someone's mom? Is she a player's aunt? I was like, hi! And

they were all wearing Rangers gears and they're like, can you move? There's another car behind you. Like we need you to get back. And the same thing happened when we left. Like fans waiting, waiting, waiting. And I was like, let's open the window. You were like, no, don't crush their dreams. No, because they get to go home and say like we saw a car like maybe it was Wayne Gretzky like you're me or Yager and let's let them have that dream forever there were young kids they'll remember that night yeah on their dad's shoulders as opposed to us rolling down the window and then saying who the fuck is this you're right no we did the right thing we did the right thing like we are just making dreams come true we're just making a dream come true

it's literally like what what we do for others it's literally the grand prospect hall we make your dreams come true yeah and then we headed to the after party which was just diabolically unwell yes I was unwell I was just like so happy to be done oh my god also the juice checks were there finally literally everyone I've ever met in my life was there yeah yeah and it was just like it was incredible like finally like it was behind me I could really like relax it was so fun obviously I didn't want it to end so like I of course was like the last one at the party. And then I went out to the club afterwards. I fell, I literally got to the club and I bought a table, like thinking like, I just sold out MSG. Like, let me buy this table for everyone. I bought the table. They handed me my credit card back. The second the woman handed it

to me, I fell and I left. It wouldn't have been a successful night if you didn't fall though. Like that's not any, a fall that you should feel shame over. I have absolutely no. No regerts. No regerts. I don't even think. I don't even want to unburden myself. The fall. My friend Abe.

Thank God for Abe. Like he did catch me a little bit. But nothing was stopping me. Let it rip. Nothing was stopping me from truly hitting the deck. Like boom. And so I left the second we got to the club. I paid for the table. Everyone got to enjoy it.

I didn't even enjoy. She never stops giving you guys. No regerts. No regerts. regerts it was the best night of my life and like I didn't think we could top beacon night and this was just I just felt so much more confident in myself like as a comedian I was so I'm so proud of the material that I wrote like there are so many like straight up just zingers in there you know like that obviously everything's funny and you make you're

so physical and you make everything even funnier like teacher is sad like isn't necessarily like funny but the way that you you had me rolling and I did feel like the campers were represented 100% um and maybe the campers like influence that moment 100% um but you literally there were so many jokes that were just like wow that's a plus comedy oh and like to top it all off like May 5th is our dad's birthday so it was just there was like a special energy in the air for all of us it was like emotional special yeah you know there was so it was obviously such a professional achievement but there were so many personal elements too uh-huh and it all culminated in just being a really special overwhelming positively

overwhelming evening I agree and I woke up just like so sad and like that's where I'm at now but I did get like a boost of serotonin because the next night like for us nothing happens for weeks go by weeks go by we don't we don't we don't leave our house then like two huge moments all happened in one weekend which was just exhausting but know what? It was meant to happen that way. Snitch's birthday was the next day. She threw herself a fabulous 25th birthday, like really premium and full of influencers, which I was loving, like the TikTokers. Like I was literally lurking in the corner,

like trying to get in their TikToks. She was. And I was like, Claudia, get in there. Like this is your chance. And they welcomed you with open arms. You said they were so happy to have you. They were so lovely, willing to share their platforms with me, their tips and tricks.

And it was amazing. Yeah, it was quite an influential event. Like finally getting to see all these influencers that Snitch hangs out with. And they're such lovely gals. No, okay. So like, they're such lovely gals. I just want to go through some of my favorite moments.

First of all, just like getting to spend a moment with Shannon Ford is really a blessing upon our household. She is so cool. And like just being in her presence made me feel cool. And I was like so grateful that she showed up for counselor. Yeah. And I just, I fucking love Shannon. I'm so happy that you do.

I love her as well. I saw her a year ago before, like right when, before I was pregnant. Like we had lunch. And I hadn't really seen her since since and so it was great to spend the weekend with her and she's just everything she's everything and Sophia LaCorte was there and I just the way I would take a bullet for that girl yeah obsessed it's crazy like the redheads are really like coming through no there was a photo of you Sophia and Shannon like three premium natural redheads it was it was almost too much to bear I know and like for me just being next to them it's a lot no but they probably feel the same about you honestly not not these no they do I

swear thanks um Serena Kerrigan who like I just am in love with like I'm just obsessed these girls they're so nice they're so nice they're so nice. They're so nice. They're so pretty and they're so funny. And like, they're just all like, when you watch all these people on TikTok, you just don't know what they're going to be like in person. But they're all just like lovely, normal girls. And they're all like showed up for Margot.

It was such a fun party. I was literally like, I got there. I was like, okay, I'm going to stay for as long as like, I can get away with. Not going to drink. Just going to like chill. Just going to support your sister. Support my sister. And then I got as long as, like, I can get away with. Not going to drink. Just going to, like, chill. Just going to support your sister. Support my sister.

And then I got there, and there was all these, like, Spritz Society ice luges and free tequila. It was like a sickening party. I was like, I have to partake. Right. And then I just got away from it, and I ended up home at 4 o'clock. And the theme was glitz and glam. So, like, everyone really showed up and showed out. So it's just like, you know, sometimes people look like slobs.

100%. But Cinch like demanded that everyone come best, like in their best wear. And so it really was an elevated event for that reason. Agreed. Like she left no box unchecked. Like the music was sickening. The venue was sickening. Everyone's outfits looked great.

And it was just good to be with everyone. Even though we were literally with them the night before. But I did not get a chance to speak to anyone the night before, and I was so blacked out that I had more normal conversations with people the second night. For me, the first night, I was catching up with everyone, like, how's Harry, showing pictures,

literally being in such a mom mode, going through my pictures. By the second night, I had all my favorite, I favorited all the photos that I wanted to see so I could just slide through not like looking through my phone like a grandma right um but the first night I was like catching up with everyone and the second night I could like just talk about other stuff enjoy yeah and so like now having been in on the town NYC nightlife two nights in a row like how are you feeling it was exhausting yeah like the

next day I could barely move and I didn't even really drink period like I think at snitch's birthday I had one spritz total over the course of opening and leaving many spritzes around and not knowing which one was mine um and for your party I didn't wind up drinking at all really because I just like never got I you were high on life didn't I didn't consider it um and I pumped at the garden for you it was so iconic you guys Jackie just pumping at the garden and then just like putting all my milk in my purse it was so iconic going to the after party how was the LV the Louis Vuitton so the LV pump is it's really a cool concept and I think that's like you know why people gravitate towards it it definitely

didn't get all the milk out that I had and I I was like, not sure if milk was coming out. It was like a little finicky, but it's a cool concept that I look forward to exploring further. But, and I did get some out, but also if you leave a lot in there like that, so you could get a clogged up so I could see how it could go haywire. But then for the next night I was just like, you know, I pumped right before I left and I pumped right when I got home and I didn't need to bring all that stuff with me. But I knew for years, like it was a much longer. Yeah. It was a long day. Yeah yeah so it was exhausting to be out on the town wearing heels was crippling I wore them to your show and it really ruined my night yeah I just had to keep finding a seat everywhere I went so then the next night I wore boots because I was

like I'm not doing this again but I need to invest in some better heels oh also for Margo's birthday we had brunch at brunch at Bergdorf's and it was such a fun day and we went did a little shopping and I'm really just trying to invest in my shoe game because even though I like have cool shoes they're a little like too cool and funky so I never actually wear them and I wind up wearing my white loafers every single day so I'm investing in like more flats and I think you guys are going to start to see that come through even though today my shoes are from shoe dazzle. Cute cute also the one thing getting me through the weekend like my feet were broken my back was broken my neck was broken my pussy my crack the whole thing um we had the

bright idea like two weeks ago for mother's day to book massages and I was like we are fucking geniuses no one on the planet has ever been more smarter than us because the only thing getting me through I woke up on Friday morning I could not not walk. My feet were like swollen. I was wearing heels the whole night. Getting a massage yesterday was the perfect way to spend Sunday of Mother's Day and Sunday after all we've been through this weekend. Right, exactly. My massage literally felt like 20 minutes. At the end, like I knew that it was ending and I was so sad. Usually like it sneaks up on me and I'm like oh okay but I was like I think this is it I think she's about to say her goodbyes like please come back it went by so quickly which is a sign of a good massage 100 but it was really um it was fleeting

I just we won't have a weekend like that for a while I actually have a crazy weekend this week I'm going to Austin and LA. I'm actually going to a little concert on Sunday. Oh yeah. All the girlies bought tickets to a concert and nobody decided to invite me. Well we're kind of like the crew who goes to this particular artist. It's so sick. We just like have a group chat. The way I was like so left out.

You're not even here. And you didn't even know I was gonna be in LA. You didn't know that. No I didn't. But Dana put it together. So take it up with her. Will do. Yeah. Will do't know that. No, I didn't. But Dana put it together, so take it up with her. Will do. Yeah. Will do. Will do. So I really just want to thank everyone who came. It was amazing.

I'm so glad we could have all been there for that historic night together. Historic. And I just can't wait to do it again. Like, gotta get back to the drawing board. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Good luck to you.

Thank you. I mean, we would all go see it. I would see it again. 100%. So I think is that everything I don't know you could jump in yeah it's like weird also the stories blow the stories yeah no like when I was looking for stories this morning there were a lot of mediocre stories so I had to just choose five mediocre ones so there's like mediocre ones I didn't choose you know yeah

but the thing is like we are so not mediocre that it'll be great. Right, I'm not concerned. And we've got Unburden Yourselves, which is our favorite segment for Mondays. So we've got a great show. Let's jump right in to the fast five stories, the fast mediocre five stories that you need to know before you wake up and take a bite out of your morning toast. Today's episode is brought to you by Credit Karma Personal Loans. Are you planning ahead for a big expense? Don't put those car repairs or medical bills on a high-interest credit card. Credit Karma can help you look for a low-interest personal loan that could save you money while

you pay off your purchases. Credit Karma uses your credit data to find loan offers that are personalized to you, so you can have a better idea of what loan amount you can get approved for. Credit Karma will even show you your chances of approval so you can choose between loan offers that you're more likely to get approved for and apply with more confidence. Comparing loans on Credit Karma is 100% free, it won't affect your credit score, and it could save you money. Credit Karma, apply with more confidence today. So if you're ready to apply, head to creditkarma.com slash loan offers to see personalized offers. That's creditkarma.com slash loan offers to find the loan for you. Creditkarma.com slash loan offers.

Today's episode is also brought to you by Bruch, the electric toothbrush that will change the way you think about brushing your teeth. With powerful sonic technology and ultra gentle bristles, the Bruch redefines what it means to have super clean teeth. It's like that feeling when you just leave the dentist, a fresh, whole, clean mouth, but it's every single day. So when you get the Bruch kit, it includes the electric toothbrush, three extra brush heads, a magnetic charging station, and a sleek travel case. The battery life on a Bruch lasts an entire 30 days on one full charge, so it makes it the perfect brush to travel with and keep your countertop charge cord-free. It's slim and sleek,

and it makes it easy to throw in your purse or your bag on the daily. It has six unique modes for every type of brusher, from gentle for sensitive gums, to white to improve tough surface, stains, and everything in between. Don't forget also about the tongue mode for that stinky breath.

If you're a breathy queen, use the brush, the tongue brush mode. They also have a two minute timer because most people only brush for 45 seconds, even though dentists recommend a full two minutes. So their quad pacer helps you make the most out of these two minutes by pausing every 30 seconds to ensure that you clean every part of your mouth. Get 20% off when you pick up your Bruch brush kit and plan when you go to bruch.com slash toast. That's 20% off when you go to bruch.com slash toast. B-R-U-U-S-H.com slash toast. You know, maybe that's why the energy and the smiles of everyone in the audience at MSG were so bright because you know all of them were using Bruch. I didn't smell one ounce of smelly breath when I walked on stage, except my own. And you know they went to bruce.com slash toast.

On my own. Love to see it. You do. Okay, first up, a little book news. Britney Spears confirms her tell-all book will come out at the end of the year. She said, I want to talk about secrets. A few months after a judge ruled that Britney's conservatorship must come to an end, a report revealed that Britney signed a $15 million book deal with Simon & Schuster for a tell-all memoir I did not know that detail while Brittany has yet to speak about

the specific terms of the deal she has confirmed that she is indeed in the process of writing that book in various posts the pop singer has opened up about her process with the book including how she feels about certain memories when she reflects on them in a more recent post she revealed that the book will arrive at the end of the year and she says I want to talk about secrets um is she pregnant I feel like remember that was like that whole hoopla and I wasn't really sure we haven't really heard about it no I know I feel like it's just gonna kind of like go away because I really don't I don't know I am waiting for more uh information information but I am very curious about this book like this seems very legit by the end of the year is quick yeah and i i believe she's working with a writer so

a lot of celebs some of my favorite celebrity memoirs are written with writers and they're they do a really good job of like because for a celebrity like they can just sit and talk and they know what happened but like for someone to put it in, it's so much easier, and I think it's a better process. So I'm sure Brittany has, she could write an anthology, an encyclopedia. So I do think it'll be really good when it comes out. Yeah, I think so, too. I also just wanted to talk about books in general, because I just finished Gary Gennetti's book, Start Without Me. Oh, don't spoil it, but you said it was amazing.

It was really good, and there's so many parts that I know you're gonna die over both of his books now are both so good and if you like to read even a little bit definitely check them out it was my first so short so if you're a short queen like me they're so short it's my first five star book of the year but I do rate celebrity like memoir non-fiction books on a different scale than fiction books yeah but still it was five stars it was really fucking good no it's on my list like I so want to go on vacation because like I really want to enjoy it like on a beach I think sometimes the place in which you read a book can affect your rating definitely like if you're on a gorgeous hammock looking over a seaside cliff like whatever piece of trash you're reading like it's going to be amazing yeah also the time it takes you to read

the book affects it too because sometimes if you read it really quickly like you're immersed in it it's really good when you read it over the course of days weeks like you forget what happened and you're just not invested 100% and you don't care 100% that's how I feel yeah so Gary Gennetti's book is high on my list I'm in the middle of Stassi's and I'm in the middle of Sally Hepworth's new book Younger Wife Younger Wife yeah very good I'm about to read Stassi's next but I actually I'm excited because I feel like there's a lot of books that I want to read right now whereas I did go through a drought a few months ago. But I hate being in the middle

of multiple books. I know that's where I was I was in the middle of three books at once. I hate that. I just finished two and now I can get back to Stassi's even though I was on like page seven. You should read Josh Peck's. You will love it. Add it to the list. You will love it. It is so well written. Also, speaking of books, I just want to remind you that the new episode of The Redheads is out.

Rave reviews as always. And the next book that we're reading, this would be, I know it's never too late and it's always a good time, but this would be an extra good time because the next book that we're reading is Run, Rose, Run

by James Patterson who's like, you know. My James Patterson. James Patterson and Dolly Parton. They wrote a book together. Oh oh and there's an accompanying accompanying soundtrack and she wrote an album of songs to go with the book the book is about like a singer-songwriter on the run i believe her name is rose rose run rose run run run run right and i imagine that the songs on the album are the songs that they're referencing in the book you know know, James Patterson is a funny fella.

Let me tell you why. First of all, he's obviously like, you know, did he write The Da Vinci Code? No, that was Dan Brown. Same thing. So he's like this prolific writer. He's so rich. He's always popping up in weird places. He does commercials for his books, which is just so random.

Like, I've never seen a commercial for a book have you well his I mean I never really thought about it but that's a good point so he just like sits and he like tells the tale of his book but he also was in the Jeffrey Epstein documentary on Netflix Filthy Rich because he was a neighbor to Jeffrey Epstein in Palm Beach so like he's just like kind of a weird guy but like very into the energy he's putting out I just want to say but he's always popping up in random places, James Patterson. He is. And he's literally written like a million books and they're all New York Times bestsellers.

It's like forever. He's so rich. Yeah. What's his net worth? Oh, let me look it up. I just wanted to like see how many books he's written. Like sometimes I'll look at the New York Times list and it's like this book by James Patterson is on it.

It's part of the list for 67 weeks. Part of the Alex Cross Cross series it's the 22nd book in the Alex Cross series right he's a kind of stereotype in that way you know what I mean like yeah no he's he 70 million dollars no it's got to be more it's gotta be more that's so impressive yeah so impressive he's like top he's like Stephen King JK Rowling like top five authors also I got a new phone this is like a totally random tangent and like explain to me why they have to like change random things on the new phone just to make you sick okay tell me why I go to safari you know I want to tap the top of the screen to go to the to put a link in no they moved it to the bottom yeah you can go back to the top you're kidding yeah but we've all already experienced this oh no wait how there's and

you're also experiencing the most annoying update which is when you're facetiming with someone all of a sudden well not all of a sudden you left the screen for a little did your own thing and can't get back to the facetime oh not only that snitch told me how to get back this new phone it's like oh we're gonna put you on do not disturb whenever we fucking feel like it. Yeah, that didn't happen to me. Also, now when you FaceTime, you're in portrait mode. Yeah, I know how to turn it off, but I like it. It's kind of cool.

You're like Tom Brady. How do I move it back to the top? That's a really good question. Settings. Settings. All right, I'll figure that out later. Settings. No, this new phone, it's like they just want to change.

By the way, the phone works exactly the same as my old one. It's not that much better. The camera is exactly the same but they want to be like yeah we did something new that's why you spent $1,300 on a new phone. So we're gonna make you sick and change all the little features that you got used to. Yeah no they're making you sick for sure. They're torturing the people. New update for those of us who don't watch who don't have TikTok but sometimes watch videos that our sisters send us. They play in Safari. You watch the video. You leave. A few minutes later your phone starts making noise. It's the next video playing in Safari. They're really making it as painful as possible for people to download. Yeah they've been doing this for a while now and also if someone does a really long TikTok you

can't watch the whole thing. I think we get like a minute. I don't know. And now your phone just like starts playing and it's, it's so weird. Just download TikTok. Not going to happen. I'm, I would lose hours, days, years off my life. You're such a principled person. Like you just, you made this decision. You're actually acting like me a little bit, like so stubborn. I guess there is some similarities between being stubborn and being principled. Okay. Also, we discovered over the weekend that I am a colonizer on Jackie's interests and choices. Because not only do I make fun of her for all of her interests, but then I'll get into her interests and then I make them my entire personality.

Like Downton Abbey. Reading. Readingbey reading reading like I wouldn't read I wouldn't watch Downton Abbey I made so much fun of you you would talk about I'd be like oh my god shut the fuck up already and then like slowly like years later I got into it like now literally like I'm gonna start my own reading podcast and my own Downton Abbey podcast yeah yeah no I apologize for that but I feel like if I'm acknowledging that I'm doing it, like it makes it better. You're acknowledging the space. And I'm just glad you're finally into the things that I'm into, though it takes time. And it's just what frustrates me the most is like, even though all the time we wasted. Oh, for sure. But I can that passes in the past. I'm looking forward. And even though you know that eventually you're going to come on to my train, like you still fight me every step of

the way like if I pick something up right now you make fun of me until it's your thing too yeah yeah yeah but like what are you referring to right now um I don't know I don't know what it is today okay um also I do want to say like that trait that I have is probably my least favorite quality in other human beings like if I'm into something and then like my friend gets into it and then like she makes it her thing and it's everyone's like oh yeah Sally loves you know knitting I'm like bitch like that's my least favorite quality so like I'm owning it but I also I'm apologizing for it and that doesn't mean I'm gonna stop doing it but I am owning it you know what that could be what projecting it's like

something that you don't like about yourself so you don't like about it in other people. For sure but I haven't liked that about other people like my whole life and I really feel like I only started doing it like two years ago. Okay. But I'm open to possible projections. I am. I am. Okay yeah that's what I think that is when there's something you don't like about yourself and like then it bothers you and other people. I think that's like yes but am I crazy but isn't it projecting by the way Jackie but don't you think like it's not an ordinary for people to find that trait annoying like you know what I mean yeah I think it's common do you ever get like so deep in a conversation that you forget I don't know what we're talking about like sometimes like you get so like you try

and evaluate like a conversation so much, you eventually stop speaking English. You get lost in it. It happens to me and Ben sometimes. And like, then he'll say something and I'm like, what were we talking about? That just happened. Yeah, that did. Like, can we just move on to the next story?

Okay. A little Mother's Day news from Priyanka Chopra and Nick Jonas. They reveal that their baby girls spent 100 plus days in the NICU on their first Mother's Day Nick and Pri are opening up about parenthood the couple shared the first photograph of their baby girl and shared their journey on Instagram on Sunday Nick reflected on welcoming his little one into the world earlier this year in the caption of his post while also celebrating Priyanka on her first Mother's Day he He said, on this Mother's Day, we can't help but reflect on these last few months and the roller coaster we've been on, which we now know so many people have also experienced. After 100 plus days in the NICU, our little girl is finally home. Every family's journey is unique and requires a certain

level of faith. And while ours was a challenging few months, what becomes abundantly clear in retrospect is how precious and perfect every moment is is we are overjoyed that our little girl is finally home that is so sad and i was actually thinking yesterday i think i said it to you i'm like i always forget that nick and priyanka had a baby because they announced it very surprised very um subtly and like never really followed up on it and I guess this is now why yeah that they're finally home with their baby because we had known that she was born prematurely because they shared when they expected her versus like when um right she was born but I didn't realize I don't think anyone really did that uh they were going through this but I'm happy that they are all home together

now 100 days is such a long time and I'm sure every day feels like an eternity like with Olivia when Kayla was in the NICU. Like going there every single day. It's like a battle. And I think she was in the NICU for like three weeks, Michaela. And that's 21 days. So that's five times the amount. Like that's crazy.

Really crazy. Really sad. But glad everyone is okay and home. And maybe this means now they'll like start sharing more. Right. Right. Because I actually had forgotten that they had a baby. Right.

Just a busy time for the Jonas family. Busy time. Also, like you say Niku weird. Niku. I said Niku. No, you didn't. You didn't. Niku?

You said Niku. I mean, there's no, it's not a word. It's an acronym. An acronym. So I could say it however the fuck I want. That's incredibly true. You can. I'm sorry, everyone.

No, don't be. Niku. could say it however the fuck i want that's incredibly true you can i'm sorry everyone no jumpy nikku also we love to have little um trinkets on our couch and today we got the most important trinket of all it's been getting hot as fuck in here these days and that's a silent fan it's a silent fan we got ourselves handheld fans claudia you got me one i'm not like i'm not i'm not hot right now but this last week i don't know maybe I was stressed about MSG, but like I was literally dripping with sweat. No, I was dripping too. Like my crevices were moist every time we got up. Yeah.

The back of my knees. But it's also because we're always wearing sweatshirts. You gave me. No, there's an on and off button on the bottom and then you have to press the. Okay. And there's just like nothing better than a fan. Okay. So she didn't.

Oh, here it is. So we have instruments. We have appliances. Yeah. We have drinks. we have drinks we have everything we need speaking of drinks tomorrow's a big day for Spritz Society if you listen to our Patreon you watched our Patreon Spritz Society um taste test you would know that we are finally launching a variety pack so all the flavors in one box and it launches tomorrow so if you're on

the Patreon we got a code for you so you you should check it out. Just check that out. Our next story, Sam Hunt's pregnant wife, Hannah Lee Fowler, calls off their divorce. What? After everything, Sam Hunt's pregnant wife is reportedly giving him a second chance after filing for divorce twice earlier this year due to infidelity allegations on the country singer's part. Hannah Lee Fowler asked the court to dismiss her request in April, and it was approved according to legal documents obtained by TMZ on Sunday. Sources also told the outlet that the married couple have recently been spotted walking their dog together in Franklin, Tennessee. Hunt

has not confirmed the reconciliation and his reps did not immediately return a request for comment but the court docs say what they say. Wow I mean she's pregnant so like even though I think Sam Hunt is the most toxic human being on the fucking planet like I have so much hate in my heart for him um you know you're gonna do what you what you can to raise the child in you know a stable home so like I understand why this is happening I'm sure like being pregnant during this very emotional time is like really you know makes you really volatile. So I get it, especially last night after watching It's Complicated. Like, you know, sometimes you can go home again.

Interesting. It's just really crazy because I'm sure for her to, especially being like celebrities, for her to file initially, no one even knew she was pregnant. So then that came up up citing infidelity came up all your business is out there so to take that really big step and put everything out into the public you know you must be really certain so then to take it all back you must also be very certain right so it's just a big swing in the emotions right but oh that's common for pregnancy right but I guess yeah I don't think she's like going back and forth because she's pregnant but she's having to make colossal decisions because she's pregnant. And that's

just not fair honestly. Yeah. Like to be in this position where you have to make such life-changing momentous decisions and like you are extremely vulnerable. Yeah like it's really not so much to ask for these men to just like keep it in their pants for 10 months. Right. No, I it's, it's so out of control. Like it's, it ain't right. So like I said, hate in my heart for Sam Hunt. I was about to say Sam Smith. Sam Smith is a nice guy. Like, sorry to, sorry to have brought him into this. It's okay. It's confusing. Yeah. But Sam Hunt is like literally one of my least favorite people. know I feel like we know right I I knew yeah and I don't want to go on my spiel because I know you like to make fun of me for only having five things to say but like it's not five there's like 20 20 if I really sat down when he got a DUI and then like just moved on with his life like

hey you didn't I didn't I'm still physically. Mentally, I'm a few months ago. Where Sam Hunt, yeah, I'm still stuck there. These things take time. Yeah. Are you ready for our next story, which is a little sports news? Only if it's a sports news that's brought to you by Curology. It is. Curology is a game-changing custom skincare made for you by a dermatology provider.

They'll create a custom prescription cream for your specific goals, whether that's tackling acne, clogged pores, skin texture, dark spots, fine lines, or something else. You'll start by taking a short online quiz and uploading photos. And if it's a good fit, they'll ship you your formula right to your door. It even has your name on the bottle. So my specific formula is targeting my dry skin, and I also have dark spots around my mouth. So I like the fact that, like, you know, Jackie and I both both did Curology and we got totally different products because we literally are different people with different skin and the fact that like for a while we all

were just like using the same skincare like it makes no sense. Same right. And so I love how custom Curology is. I love the quiz because sometimes like you could think like how great can my skincare be if I ordered it online like you are getting really really specific questions you're taking really up close pictures of your of your skin. And it's really in depth to get you the best possible skincare. You can get started just like we did with a free 30-day trial at Curology.com slash toast.

You just pay $5 for shipping and handling. And that's Curology spelled C-U-R-O-L-O-G-Y.com slash toast and start your free 30-day trial anytime. And your prescription is subject to consultation. You will definitely not regret starting your Curology journey, whether you're, again, trying to fight your acne, fine lines, dark spots, anything that you want, Curology can fix.

Thank you, Claudia. It's a pleasure. Our next story, some sports news. In a shocking upset, well, the Kentucky Derby was this weekend. Is Kentucky Derby considered sports? Yes. Okay. It's on the ESPN.

It's like the horses running, not the people. Yeah, but would you consider NASCAR sports? I don't know. That's a good question. Why don't you think about it? The person who asked a question like that is obviously really smart. Thank you, Claudia question why don't you think about it the person who asked a question like that is obviously really smart thank you Claudia why don't you think about it no I because I asked a question like about Kentucky Derby oh to me like that's not a good question like I know the answer you don't think it's a good question I know the answer honestly like

NASCAR sports NASCAR you're sitting like okay really okay so if now ready, so if NASCAR... Ready? Okay, wait. If NASCAR... NASCAR fans. If NASCAR drivers are... If NASCAR drivers are athletes, like so am I. We both sit for a living. No, I'm totally kidding. Yeah, sure. It's a sport. Whatever.

Okay, so some sports moves. I don't know, actually. Okay. Do you think those jockeys are athletes? Yes. Okay, but now... Horseback riding is an Olympic sport. Now I'm fixated on NASCAR.

Okay, who's like the biggest? Dale Earnhardt. Jimmy Johnson. Is that his name? Yeah. Dale Earnhardt. No, football coach. Bush with the SCH.

Yeah, Jimmy Johnson. Hottie. He's American. They don't call him an athlete on Wikipedia. American professional auto racing driver. Okay. But like if you look up LeBron James, do they say American professional basketball player? Yes.

That's exactly what they say. That's a good question. Hold on. Do they call him an athlete? LeBron James, Wikipedia. Basketball player. Yeah. Interesting.

It's just something to think about, to chew on. I know where I land on this debate debate but it's obviously not as obvious it doesn't mean that much too no no that's not what i was gonna say it's not such an obvious thing for you i feel like we're getting to the point in the conversation like we did last time we're like we're not gonna know what we're talking about i know we're talking about the fact that horse racing is a sport yeah kentucky derby was this weekend part one of the Triple Crown and it was a huge upset and a shocking upset Rich Strike won the 2022 Kentucky Derby at 80 to 1 odds the longest among all 20 horses in the race it's the second biggest upset in the Derby's 148 year history behind Donrail

which won in 1913 as a 91 to 1 long shot so I guess if you put like a hundred dollars on it you would have won 8,000 or 800 80 times 100 is 8,000 no it's yeah it's 8,000 yeah that's crazy no that's insane now I'm like wishing I went to the derby right but would you ever have put a hundred dollars on the biggest loser well the thing is like for me as a gambler like I wouldn't have really looked at the odds I would have looked at like whose name I like the most and honestly like I might have chosen rich strike because it would have been like oh man this is a sign he will make me rich like I could have seen a world in which I put $50 on this horse I could see that too because the other two favorites were epicenter which I don't think speaks to you no and Zandon no I don't think

what other horse names were there okay let me because I'm really more of like a, I'm a linguistical kind of girl. Like words mean a lot to me. That's so you. So if I went to the teller and they were like, which horse do you want to put it on? And I looked at the names, like I would have been like, which one of these words means the most to me? And I do love the concept of being rich. So Rich Strike, I probably would have put my money behind okay so rich strike epicenter this

is an order of who won epicenter xan don simplification no mo donagle no barber road no tawny part tawny port no smile happy that might have gotten you yeah because i would have been like ah you know yeah you wouldn't like yeah tis the bomb that's pretty good i might have done that zozos no classic causeway no taiba no crown pride no happy jack i would have been like oh my sister jackie's here with me you know what if i wasn't there no that's what i, in spirit, she would want me to do this one. She's like the orb dancing around. Messier. No. White Aburrillo.

No. Charge It. No. That's kind of good. Cyber Knife. I just want to say, these names suck. These names are crazy. What goes into naming a horse?

Mine would be Disgraced Queen. A hundred percent. What would yours be? Oh, my gosh. Redhead. Oh, Redhead is would yours be? Oh my gosh. Redhead. Oh, Redhead is cute. Maybe Bryson Dyson. What about Bryson Dyson, Streisand Dora?

Streisand, Kreisand, Meissen. Mine would actually be Dora. Mine would be Streisand. No lie. No lie. That would be my horse name. Yeah. Streisand.

Bryson Streisand. No, and then you'd have the gay community behind you because they'd think you were naming the horse after Barbara. But you're obviously naming it after Bryce, Bryson Streisand. No, and then you'd have the gay community behind you because they'd think you were naming the horse after Barbara. Right. But you're obviously naming it after Bryce, Bryson Streisand. Right. And in a weird way, it's actually named after Bruno Mars because that's who Bruno's named after.

Got it. Summer is Tomorrow. No, it's not. Ethereal Road. I was in my listing voice. Oh, my God. I'm sorry. I didn't realize that you were still talking about the names.

I was back to the list. I'm like, Summer's not Tomorrow. I was in my listing voice. Okay my god, I'm sorry. I didn't realize that you were still talking about the names. I was back to the list. I'm like, Summer's not tomorrow. I was in my listing voice. Okay, Summer's tomorrow, terrible name. Ethereal Road. Fine. Rattle and Roll. I agree that Rich Strike might have struck you.

Yeah, in a profound way. In a profound way. And did you watch the Ariel video of Rich Strike coming up from the back? It was, honestly, it was giving Seabiscuit. Secretariat. It was giving major motion picture it's giving definitely gonna have some sort of film and i will be the first in line to see only if rich strike goes on to do well in the next two races yeah that was like really crazy and as someone who loves the movie secretariat it was

it was giving secretary because secretariat always came from behind because he wouldn't use all of his energy in the first few stretches. Right, which is a good strategy. Clearly. Clearly. I wonder how much money someone won on Rich Strike like the most. Oh, let's... I don't know if they share that information. Rich Strike gambler winner.

Where does the Kentucky Derby take place? I'm guessing Kentucky. That's a really good question. What's the second race? Not the Belmont. That's the third one. I don't know. But we got to go.

We got to get some hats and go. To the Kentucky Derby. Or to one of them. I've been to the Belmont. What? Yeah. That's like a thing you do when you live in new york city like post-grad living i've never been it was torture why absolute torture like you take the train there because

it's on the train station and so much standing oh and it was just like not wearing the right shoes they didn't give me any arch support um and then you have to like take the train home. And the race itself is really short. And that was the year that there was like some really big buzz around. A horse had won two and it was like — American Pharoah? —No, it was like California King bed. And you — —In this California King bed —You guys will remember. And it was just not my day.

And that's all I'll say about it because it's like a long journey it's like an hour on the train five minutes at the track an hour back on the train yeah but also i think there are different like ways you can go and i wasn't in the like hats and heels and dresses space maybe if i went like and made a day of it like that i would have enjoyed it more probably not interesting um i'm looking oh oh hey here's a story for you from kentucky.com stephanie rogers hadn't won a race all day rogers whose husband works at churchill downs in louisville was able to take in saturday's kentucky derby as a fan but she had failed to find success betting on the races she began betting around the seventh race

of saturday's 14 race card and unsuccessfully bet exactus up until the 148th running of the Kentucky Derby at 6.57 p.m. That's when Stephanie strayed from her usual betting strategy at the urging of her son. I don't usually do win bets, Rogers told the Herald-Leader, but she did this time, and she won big. She placed $3 on Rich Strike, the 80-1 long shot at a position number 20. That was the only in the derby field after the Friday morning scratch of Ethereal Road. Wow, they're really just telling us how much she won. They are making Amy all of this.

So what's 80 times 3? Roger said her son told her to do the bet because of Rich Strike's long odds. Just kind of picked the longest shot and said, why not? And then she won. How much? It's a shame.

Kentucky.com. She won about $280 from her bet. That's it? It's a shame she didn't follow with her habit of placing exacticas, because if she did $2 with an exactica, she would have made $4,000. she did $2 with an exactica, she would have made $4,000. So the person who won the most is $280?

This is just the tale of one woman. And she was the first one who came up. The first one who sold her story. I'm happy for her. I'm happy for her. It's a big week. And I'm happy for her son, who's obviously like the hero of the day. Right. Are you ready for our fifth and final story? No, you're gonna hate this one more.

Meta is opening its first VR store, physical store, selling VR headsets as they inch closer to mainstream reality. Meta platforms, Facebook, formerly known as Facebook, is opening its first physical store to sell items like its Oculus Quest 2 headset this week. The Facebook parent company is prepared to lose $10 billion on its hardware division, Reality Labs, this year and reported a loss close to $3 billion in the most recent quarter. Some experts say it may only take one or two killer apps for the metaverse to boost vr use from a mere five percent of teens to a bigger market now i'm not an expert in tech predictions etc you're not but stop trying to make vr happen it's not going to happen i completely agree it's

not the vibe stop literally for so long now at least five years we've had Google Lens, we've had Oculus, spectacles, Oculus and the people who want to be like this in their living room. Right. Are doing it but most of us do not want it and I know that everyone is placing so much hope and even money into the metaverse and alternate realities. And I just don't think it's going to happen. I like this world. It's not perfect, sure. No, no, definitely not.

But it's a good one. No, and it exists. Like it's real. It's tangible. And the idea, and I know I'm shirking like every single TED Talk and panel that's been taking place, but the idea that like we're going to be buying real estate in the metaverse, like big money I'm going to spend. I don't even own a home here.

So I can go on my couch and be like this. I just, maybe I just don't have the vision. But I don't get it. Is that I think the technology of VR and AR is helpful in other things. Like I know it's helpful in like medicine and like other technology. I think the technology of AR and VR helps to create other things. Like, I know it's helpful in, like, medicine and, like, other technology. I think the technology of AR and VR helps to create other things. But this commercial idea that, like, we're going to sell people VR and, like, make things for your home, like, glasses and this thing. Yeah, I don't think, like, it's necessarily, like, a B2C concept. Yeah, and that the whole world is going

to be living in the metaverse soon. So we're all just sitting on our couches living elsewhere like then it's just like okay what about then you start to think about like what about the national parks we're just going to leave those like sitting dormant. Such a valid question. Why would I want to go to a national park in the metaverse when there's beautiful geysers to be seen in the real world? God's creations. Why do I want to watch Mark Zuckerberg's waterfall when God has created beautiful ones? No, it's so true. And honestly, like, I think a lot of how I personally feel about this, and maybe it's you too, it's like, it's just my general, like, vibe about meta. Like, I just don't like, like anything they do or trust them. But like, and so this bothers me. But like,

for some reason, like, whenever Amazon does something, something I'm like that's a good idea okay I feel that way in general and even take the meta out of it because I think they just like jumped onto this idea of like meta versus and that call themselves meta but like other places are building these communities and worlds too and I still think it's just not the vibe stop same same but I don't know maybe if Amazon got involved I would be like maybe this has a future if Amazon got involved, it would make me think it had a future because they don't get involved in small change. Right. No, but like.

If Elon got involved. If Elon got involved. Right. Like, I just like literally hate Mark Zuckerberg and like his whole energy and everything he creates. Except I love Instagram and it's given me a platform and a life. But like, you know what I mean. Thank you, Mark.

Thanks, Mark. I actually should shut the fuck up. Like, he literally is a power at one button. But like, you know what I mean. Thank you, Mark. Thanks, Mark. I actually should shut the fuck up. Like he literally is a power at one button. I'm broke, you know? Yeah. No, it's not even a Mark Zuckerberg issue for me. It's just like a what's wrong with this world issue for me and what we should create another one that we can ruin.

Like maybe we should just fix this one. Yeah. Fix the issues at hand. No, I think that's really, really a valid point. And I love the energy. I just, I don't know. I think people need to like focus on the physical at hand. No, I think that's really, really a valid point. And I love the energy. I just, I don't know. I think people need to like focus on the physical world more. Yeah, I agree.

And like, I don't think, you know, submerging ourselves into other worlds is going to be good for our mental health. Like, I just think it's a lot. No, our mental health, our physical health. Yeah. No, it really is like Black Mirror. And there's just like no accountability i could be anyone who i want to be in the metaverse right no like remember

that episode of black mirror where landon from friday night lights is like this loser in the real world and then at night he like puts on his metaverse goggles and he like has kidnapped people in other worlds and he's like a fucking sadistic freak yeah that's what's gonna happen like dual personalities and he can't get out. And he kidnapped all these people from his office and took them. People who were mean to him in his office. He like took them into his special universe and tortured them. And took them away from their friends and family.

That was messed up. That was the craziest episode. There were. No. Not the craziest. No. Sorry. Did we all forget about the pig?

No. We're not going there. But anyways. Those are just my initial thoughts on the metaverse you know always I'm open to being wrong and I don't like know a ton about all this stuff it just like rubs me the wrong way do you feel the same way about like bitcoin I was just about to say I don't feel the same way about like NFTs no NFTs that's that's a different conversation I don't feel that way about cryptocurrency even though I don't fully understand it I see it right now and I think it's a valid currency yeah I don't feel that way about cryptocurrency, even though I don't fully understand it. I see it.

I can see it. And I think it's a valid currency. Yeah. I can sense it. I think that it's real. And Elon's all in. Therefore, I am in. But I'm not only just in because of Elon.

But, you know, his seal of approval does mean a lot to a girl like me who doesn't understand such things. Right. No, I agree. I feel the same way. So it's not like we're totally against new image tech. I'm not. Not at all. No. And NFTs, I'm I'm sorry it's gonna be a no for me I agree big no and that's something I

see I could be wrong about someone once explained it to me and I got as close as I could to seeing the value and like actually if I was someone who saw value like we could really NFT the fuck out of our show okay so I actually like I don't even think I ever told you this value like we could really NFT the fuck out of our show okay so I actually like I don't even think I ever told you this but like I had like a full call with like a company that had all these ideas for how we could become like NFT queens and I was really really like into understanding it I was but then I was like but what if I screenshot it like that's that's literally like the loophole in the whole thing. Yeah. Just take a screenshot. Yeah.

I came really close to understanding. And then I went back to the real world. And I was like, no. No. Then you like got it. And that's what I think happens. I think like this metaverse. And NFTs is really a part of that. Because you buy art that you would hang on your house in the metaverse.

Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because like you don't physically get anything. Yeah. And I just think it's it's kind of like a cult like they're so they're in another world it's so true and I'm in this one and for that reason it's giving nexium yeah we just can't connect no we cannot those are my thoughts well that was a very interesting little tech segment thank you so

much Jackie for bringing that up oh and so my thoughts about uh meta like creating physical stores for people to try on these headsets they They can't even buy them in the stores. They have to actually buy them on they have to order them. It's giving moronic. It's giving moronic. Those are my thoughts but I mean they're investing so much money in it that maybe it's not but maybe it is. Yeah but also like that's a similar model to Tesla. Like when you go into a Tesla store you can't buy a Tesla. Well that's like a bigger purchase. Right. You know know so it's like what's the point of the stores to try them out i would like there's not even there's no cars in the stores okay but do they show you how honestly i have no idea what goes down in the stores they're like literally empty we have to go yeah you need a tesla yeah

because you don't even know how to drive but they drive themselves i know i do still think you need a license to operate one i do believe that as well well. But if it drives so well, like, why should I get pulled over and have to show my license? No, when Tesla makes a convertible, like, it's over. Yeah, I think they're close. Yeah, no. That's really the next frontier because they have the pickup truck. That's the only thing. Like, you know, I've been getting a lot of Teslas around the city for Uber.

Like, I get them. I literally had one yesterday and the day before. And I love the inside. I think the apparatus is so cool. But, like, we all need to talk about how the outside is like literally so ugly like it's giving it's giving mom car like it's giving me there are so many different kinds there are some that are really sleek there are some that is you know are giving um prius prius or what's the car that's every toyota camry yeah but it's toyota camry batmobile edition yeah but like once they

really start investing in like sickening like make it look like a convertible then i'll get one because they're fucking like expensive and i just like i want to look cool in my car but they have different tiers like they have an affordable option no i know i get it and like the one david doberk has which is like the most sick expensive one like it's giving station wagon is it yeah to look it up yeah david jrbark has like the one with the bat will be like the wings come up you got it it doesn't look like just like a bmw x5 no it's literally giving cars it's giving back uh it's giving minivan well that is a sleek look for me minivan uh yeah i love a minivan i know you're gonna be a minivan mom? You love

minivans. I do. I love being in the back though. I don't know how I'll feel in the front. Right. Is this what you're talking about? Yes. Okay to me that looks like like a BMW X5 but I could see how you know to be an untrained eye. Right yeah for sure. It's giving minivan. Alright let's dive into Unburden Ourselves which is our Monday segment where people write in and unburden themselves with the embarrassing things they did over the weekend. And it's brought to you by Money With Katie. You should check out Money With Katie from The Morning Brew.

Finance bros are out and rich girls are in. Katie Gotti knows about money, and she's here to help you manifest your financial freedom. Join Katie and her guests as they talk spending habits, smart investing, and tax strategies without putting you to sleep. Listen weekly on Wednesdays to learn how to turn your rich girl mindset into money. And you can listen wherever you get podcasts. So a lot of the recent episodes, they discuss topics like the most dangerous misconceptions about the 4% withdrawal rate,

why renters and owners alike would benefit from a housing market cool down, how to buy back your time, outsourcing tasks, investing the age of overvalued stocks and homes, and why you may need to save less for your retirement than you think. She also has a blog and a newsletter that are released weekly, as well as free downloadable tools and documents for money management and budgeting. So that's moneywithkatie.com, and you can check out Money With Katie from The Morning Brew on Wednesdays, wherever you get your podcasts. Unburden ourselves. Yourselves.

So if you ever want to write in, it's unburdenyourselves at gmail.com. And trust me, like, you may think, like, I can't say this. It's too embarrassing. But once you let it go, like, you will feel so much better. Free yourself. Hi, Claudia and Jackie. Last night I went to dinner with my friends at my boyfriend's restaurant. It was a lovely time. Look at you, boyfriend's restaurant.

Right, like, subtle. Just subtle, humble brag. It was a lovely time, but I was feeling backed up up all day so i drank a lot of water at dinner the food was really rich and delicious after dinner i got caught in some traffic and it took me about an hour to get home as it was running from my car to the bathroom i shit my pants i shit my pants i'm a 32 year old woman and this hasn't happened to me in years i didn't want to tell my boyfriend because i don't want i don't want him to think there's anything wrong with the food he cooked no but there. No, but there is.

But there is. No, but she said she was backed up all day and then chugged so much water so like it was just about time. Still, I really don't believe, like unless you're sick, you can clench. It's painful.

It's uncomfortable. But I think that like just being backed up and everything moving so quickly in an hour because you drank water, like I'm sorry, you were poisoned. No, that's an interesting conspiracy I yeah and I mean really rich foods can hurt your stomach but that's on the food no I don't think you should tell your boyfriend not because you don't want him to think that you um were poisoned you shouldn't tell your boyfriend because then like you know the magic is gone right you just if he didn't bear witness to it like you

don't need to tell not everyone needs to know everything like and i think that's really important i think that's important too but don't blame yourself for this no yeah agree because like a dinner out shouldn't make you shit your pants no matter what you did earlier that day and you know what just unless you like took a laxative really think about water really think about how much worse it could be like at least you were right outside your house not like in a public setting a public setting where you, like, you could literally go in, throw your clothes away, take a shower, and the whole saga's behind you.

So I would be grateful for that, you know? Like, you weren't an hour outside like Joey Camasta in the back of your Uber, you know? I have one thing to say. What?

Juliana, I drink a lot of water. If you know, you know. Thank you for unburdening yourselves. I honestly don't think that that was that big of a deal. Like, just always think about how much worse things could be, and then'll feel so much better and it's also not your fault right exactly there's no really personal accountability that needs to be taken here none next up hey claudia and jackie i did something so incredibly embarrassing at work this week and i absolutely need to unburden myself it was my

first week back at work after six months of maternity leave wow six months where do you work on my first day i was doing the rounds around the office saying hi to my colleagues that I hadn't seen in six months, but then I bumped into the CEO. I don't know him super well as it's a big company and we don't work together closely, but he knows who I am and he knew it was my first day back. He looked at me and said, hey, welcome back, and he extended his arms for a hug. What the fuck? I was caught off guard since I don't usually hug my co-workers let alone the ceo so due to me panicking we ended up in this weird half hug where my face was squished directly into his chest and he had his arms wrapped around me when i emerged from his embrace i noticed that all of my makeup foundation had rubbed off on the on the front of his black

hugo boss cardigan it looked like the perfect print of my ivory-colored face on his shirt. He didn't notice the stain, but my face turned red like a tomato, and I, for some reason, was too embarrassed to point it out, so I just walked away. I sat at my desk the rest of the day, watching him walk around the office with my makeup all over his chest. Later in the day, I saw someone pointed out to him and helped him wipe the stain off the sweater.

I could see the CEO racking his brain and looking around, trying to figure out what caused the massive face-shaped stain on his shirt. I just sunk down in my chair, and I never looked up for the stain off the sweater. I could see the CEO racking his brain and looking around trying to figure out what caused the massive face shape stain on his shirt. I just sunk down in my chair and I never looked up for the rest of the day. I don't know why this is so embarrassing, but I'm still getting knots in my stomach thinking about it. Sincerely, a girl who needs to get a new setting spray. Okay. I would be so embarrassed too. But I think you're okay because I really don't think he knew it was you.

Plus, he's clearly a hugger. Could have been the other person he hugged or, you know, ifged multiple people and if he didn't immediately know oh that's a face and that's makeup like men don't realize that that's makeup he when he sees a stain he's not thinking makeup like he's probably thinking oh I spilled something no what I was gonna say was like even if he did know it was makeup the fact that he walked around for hours with it really puts you in the clear like you know how many people he's a CEO you know how many people he interacts with like meetings meetings meetings so you're just now one of 10 people it could have been and that is better he's not gonna put it together first he needs to realize that it's makeup yeah then he needs to retrace his

steps this is a man who hugs like he you're probably not the only hug he had that day and even if it was he might men don't like remember these things like we do. It's not seared into their memory. Right, like thinking that was a weird hug for him. It's just like one of many altercations he has throughout his day as CEO. Yeah, and you know what? He's just, he's not worried about where it came from.

He's feeling like a clown that he walked around with it. So he's like- He has unburdened himself to us now. Everyone's just thinking about themselves. You're fine. Yeah, that's the best advice. And that's really at the end of the day, like what unburden yourselves always comes down to. Like you can be the best advice and that's really at the end of the day like what unburden yourselves always comes down to like you can be thinking about it so much but at the end of the day you have to realize like literally nobody

cares about you and i mean that in the nicest way possible like no one is thinking about you no one is looking at you no one is thinking like when they go home about the thing that you did like just you they're thinking about the thing that they did you just have to switch your perspective yeah 100 third and final. Hey, girlies. I recently traveled to NYC with two of my best friends to celebrate my 21st birthday. We had a whole weekend

planned on my birthday and we were going to the Comedy Cellar and then going out. Being three non-New York girlies, we definitely missed the right train, we missed the show

and I was bummed. My friends quickly pulled me into a bar to calm me down and we made a plan and of course I just started drinking. In true 21st birthday fashion, people were buying me drinks

and shots and the bartenders were really just giving me things. Of course I was living for it but I soon did pay. At the end of the night drunk and happy I called an Uber and rounded up my friends and we started our 15 minute drive back to the hotel. In the car I started feeling a little sick but I thought I could breathe through it and make it. Boy was I wrong. A sudden urge and it all came back up. The most disgusting part being my mask was still on. Boy, was I wrong. A sudden urge and it all came back up. The most disgusting part being my mask was still on.

Oh no. It was all over me and my clothes, but the only thing I could think about was the cleaning fee. I sat entirely in my filth, mask filled with vomit, until I could get out, hoping I was sneaky enough for the Uber driver not to notice. I then fell out of the Uber onto the road and had to walk through the lobby and upstairs with throw up all over me and my friends warning others not to get in the elevator with us while filming me. So embarrassing, but proud to get in the elevator with us while filming me. So embarrassing, but proud to say I did not get charged a cleaning fee.

So she kept it in, some things, you know what, like I'm all about being financially responsible, but like some things are worth paying for. And to just unhook your mask and let the vomit out from underneath your nose and mouth just to pay like a 50 to $200 cleaning fee, like that's worth it. Yeah, it wouldn't be the cleaning fee

that I feel bad about. It would be like the driver whose car I soiled. Yeah. And I'm not going to judge you because, I was about to, I was about to be like, who does this? But you know what? Me, on my 21st birthday.

I had the exact same night as you did. So I'm in literally no position to judge. Happy birthday. It's a rite of passage. Agreed. It wasn't my 21st birthday, I had the exact same night as you did. So I'm in literally no position to judge. Happy birthday. It's a rite of passage. Agreed. It wasn't my 21st birthday. It was my first night out in college. And I was in the back of an Uber.

This has actually happened to me twice. I was in the back of an Uber, like drinking a lot. I think I actually smoked a cigarette, which was like not something I would ever do. That drunk cigarette will kill you. Kill you. So I'm in the back of a car. I'm with my friends. You're not a smoker. Yeah. I'm with my friends, Alicia and Lay. So I'm in the back of a car. I'm with my friends. You're not a smoker.

Yeah. I'm with my friends, Alicia and Layla. I'm like, you guys, I'm going to throw up. And I literally made a bowl with my hands, threw up the perfect amount, chucked it out the window, and all was good. Then the second time it happened was a few years later. I smoked pot. And I'm really not a good pot smoker.

I got so anxious. I was in this apartment. I was like, oh, my God, I have to go to the bathroom. Like, I'm so anxious. I could die. I don't know what's going on. And then all of a sudden I just, even though I was in the bathroom, I threw up in my hands and all my anxiety went away. I guess like the, the throw up coming up, my system was coming through as anxiety, but it was just throw up. I threw up in my hands and then I had a great time. That's great. Yeah. No, you're 21. Like that's what you're supposed to be doing on your birthday.

And it's really gross. Um, but. Like, that's what you're supposed to be doing on your birthday. And it's really gross. But that's what happens. And I think you might have had worse anxiety and had to unburden yourselves even more if you had thrown up in this nice man's car. Yeah, yeah. The mask part, like, but there's always going to be, you know, some grossness to it. Yeah, but it's a 21st birthday. Yeah, and it's a sign of the times that you threw up in your mask. A hundred percent. Well, that was Unburden of the times that you threw up in your mask.

100%. Well, that was Unburden Yourselves. Thank you to everyone who was vulnerable with us. This is always a safe space most of the time. And if you ever want to unburden yourself, it's unburdenyourselves at gmail.com. It's plural. Unburdenyourselves at gmail.com. We keep it anonymous. And we just try to make you feel better because Mondays are hard enough.

All you ladies or gents who wrote in this week you're good you're good yeah you're good nothing that will haunt me you know and I've had some things on this show that really stuck with me yeah but forgive yourselves you guys it's okay it's fine um and that's our show that is our show thank you guys so much for listening to the morning toast the millennial Millennial Morning Show. Millennial. The Millennial Morning Show where we deliver the best five stories that you need to know every Monday through Friday

on YouTube. So if you're watching this on YouTube, please feel free to subscribe and give this video a thumbs up. We're also available as a podcast anywhere podcasts can be found.

So that's Spotify, iTunes, Stitcher, Public Radio, iHeartRadio, CastBox, all the places. So wherever you listen to podcasts,

find us at The Morning Toast and leave a five star review about how beautiful, about how stunning, about how smart we are. Have an amazing day you guys. We'll see you tomorrow in studio with

The Snatchler. I'm so excited for you, and I'm so excited as a viewer. Snitch on the toast. Snitch on the toast. Snitch on the toast. Snitch on the toast. We'll see you tomorrow. Don't miss it.

Bye.