The Toast - The Great Simon Powell with Ben Soffer: Friday, April 7th, 2023

Episode Date: April 7, 2023

Jack Black Confirms ‘School of Rock’ Cast Will Reunite For 20th Anniversary (Variety) (18:50) Liam Payne is ‘Desperate To A One Direction Reunion to Relaunch His Career’ (Daily Mail) (28:58) Kourtney Kardashian, Travis Barker Share ‘Inside Look’ At Wedding in Hulu Special (Page Six) (41:40) Tom Brady and Reese Witherspoon Are Not Dating, Have Never Met, Despite Rumors (Page Six) (47:58) Gynecologist Reveals Most Shocking Thing He’s Found in a Vagina (NY Post) (54:40) The Toast with Jackie (@JackieOshry) and Claudia Oshry  (@girlwithnojob)  Merch The Toast Patreon Girl With No Job by Claudia OshrySee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Good morning, Millennials, and welcome back to the Toast. Happy Friday! Oh my god, it's Friday, Friday, gotta get down on Friday. Everybody's looking forward to the weekend, weekend, Friday, Friday, getting down on Friday. Wasn't she just in the news? Didn't something happen to her? Rebecca Black? Yeah.

Are you keeping up with pop culture again, Ben? No, I'm just like, I remember seeing her name and it was negative. Oh, no. I guess this isn't that helpful if I don't remember the story. Well, that's okay. Because Ben is here today, which is so exciting. If you're watching on YouTube, there's kind of like something crazy happening. Like we added a second camera.

We're trying something new. So if you hate it, let us know. If you you hate it let us know if you like it let us know and if it sucks we'll never do it again but we got another camera we got new curtains I wanted to you know shake up the studio and Jackie's not here to tell me no so I'm doing what I want it's anarchy over here at the toast Jackie is not available today but her loss is our gain because ben then then i'm just saying it really is her loss is our game yeah i'm so viral you're the second that you clip this and it goes on tiktok like if you look at all of your tiktoks yeah the ones with me in it to the moon actually the ones with jackie and it like always go to the moon but you too for sure for sure to the moon what do you think it is about you that has that viral quality I don't know what an interesting question I think that maybe I just bring out a different side of you you definitely

bring out like a more um what is the word you definitely bring out like a more sassy side of me. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And I definitely get like a little more stressed when we podcast together because I'm doing stories and I'm doing ads and I'm just like me. Do you? Let me take the load off. Give me the iPad.

No, no. I could. No, that would make me more stressed. It would? Yeah. And it must be so fun for you. Like you just get to sit and chat and be like the funny guy everybody loves. Totally.

But like I can take the stress off. I can do it. can't no it's okay I can oh my god he's been podcasting for what a month and he thinks he could do my job by the way a month literally we're at the University of Miami where you're doing a wonderful speaking gig you and Jackie she turns to the audience and says yeah Ben's doing so great good guys 14 episodes 31 sorry I did one month I six months I did reference the good guys in our panel because we're always talking about how, you know, people are always asking like, how do we start a podcast?

And what are your biggest tips? And I think a lot of people say like, if you haven't started a podcast, you're too late. It's too late for you. And I think the good guys are a great example that it's not too late. If you have quality content, you guys, in the beginning, you had some audio issues.

You worked through them. Then you got your videos up. So if you have quality audio quality video and quality guys it's not too late and that was I know you're focusing on the part where I said you only had 14 episodes and you actually have 30 sorry I don't count every day but it was a compliment or listen or watch excuse me I'm your number one fan are Are you up to date? No. What was the most recent episode? I definitely missed it because I know you told that story about when you were a teenager

and you watched porn with a friend and you ran home and told your mom. Yeah, that was very, very, it's a great, great story. Check out Good Guys in case you want to watch it. Let's get some Good Guys tea because, what was it, yesterday or no, two days ago, you were here in our studio recording a remote episode with Josh with a very premium guest who I'm a really big fan of. Good guys is getting premium guests because Josh is just a celebrity. I know. Isn't it crazy how famous he is?

He's so famous and all of his friends are just famous friends. So tell everyone who your guest was. So Tana Mongeau was just on the show. What was she like? She's amazing. She was just like really smart and like an entrepreneur, mogul. Like the way that she has navigated this like OnlyFans business. Like you'll hear about it more in the podcast, but she owns her own OnlyFans agency.

Where she like represents other OnlyFans. Yeah, it's amazing. It's really smart. It's amazing. She's starting a weed company. Starting a weed company. And she's just a very, very interesting gal. And we really enjoyed talking to her.

Also, just like quick spoiler. We, like, just amazing guests. Can I talk about some of the other guests? Coming up? Coming up. Let's tease one at a time. I think it's good. Let's get everyone excited about Tana.

I have to give one more. No. But I already started talking about it. Wait, I can't even remember. I know you told me yesterday. Don't say it. Don't say it. Don't say it.

You told me yesterday. Oh, my gosh. Josh got blank. Forget it, guys. Oh, I'm not going to talk about that one. Oh, okay, fine. There's a lot of them. No, don't.

Okay, fine. Give one more. One more, John Stamos. Oh, of course. Because Josh and John Stamos are like best friends. Everywhere you look. Yeah, everywhere.. Because Josh and John Stamos are like best friends. Everywhere you look. Yeah. Do you ever feel FOMO?

Since like a lot of times you live in New York and the guests, sometimes you're in LA to record with them, but sometimes you're remote. And then do you feel like left out of the conversation? No, because I make sure to insert myself in the conversation. Love that for you, Pound. But I do wish that we could be in person together doing it every day. It's just so much easier. Yeah.

Like this is so easy. I know. I would say you get about 50% every day. It's just so much easier. Yeah. Like this is so easy. I know. I would say you get about 50% of your episodes in together which is good. Yeah. Because I'm constantly traveling to California.

God forbid Josh comes here. Totally. Is that like a Get off your keister. Is that like a point of contention in your relationship? No because like

he gets Tana and John Stamos. No totally. And the Dear Media studios are like so pretty. They always look so good, the episodes. Amazing. Yeah. Amazing.

But like nothing beats this studio. Actually, like a lot of things beat this studio. We're a little fecocked over here. I think this is an amazing studio. We'll see how this episode turns out. I'm like very nervous about like our new camera, our new setup. We did get new curtains. Thanks for noticing.

Do the curtains match the drapes? Don't be disgusting. This is a family show. You could spew disgusting things like that on your own show, good guys. Over here, we are a family show. We have a lot of kids who watch with their mothers. This is a nice show. Even though today we kind of have like a crazy vaginal story that I can't wait to tell you about.

By the way, apologies if I sound like I'm sick. It's just my augmentin just coming back up the throat. You know, I had a sinus infection. Now the sinus infection seems to be cured. But I just got to say modern medicine, you take too much of it, all of a sudden it makes you more sick. That's true. Antibiotics. What's it called? Rebound? I don't know. The rebound? Whenever anyone I know is taking amoxicillin, I share with them a story that nobody listens to me and you have to learn the hard way. It's the same with like the notovirus. Yeah. When you are taking a lot of amoxicillin and you're sick and you're not eating, like you will have the craziest diarrhea and stomach pains unless you're taking

a probiotic. So whenever anyone I know is taking amoxicillin, I tell them, get a probiotic. And people don't listen to me. You didn't listen. Speaking of diarrhea, should we talk about last night? Yeah. It's not about us. Oh my God. oh my god so uh we literally woke up at we went to bed early at like 11 we woke up at like 1 1 a.m to a crying sound and it was bruno and bruno had the craziest smelliest most liquidy diarrhea all over our carpet like my god bruno you couldn't have done it on the hardwood to throw it away we threw we literally threw our carpet. Like, my God, Bruno, you couldn't have done it on the hardwood. Like, we had to throw it away. We literally threw our carpet away in the middle of the night. And I was torn between feeling bad for him and wanting to kill him.

I felt very bad for him because any diarrhea that smells like that. Oh, God, stop. I always think people are so dramatic. People always say, oh, my God. Oh, my God. I'm going to throw up. Like, shut up. That was you. No, I know. But, like, shut up. You're not going to throw up like shut up you're not that was you no i know but like shut up you're

not gonna throw up like nine times out of ten every single time i've heard that so dramatic this oh my god i was gonna throw up like this was the similiest you know what i think you might feel differently once you start changing diapers like i have i've changed harry's diaper many times michaela i've changed all the kids diapers and every now and then the kid eats something that blows it up and it is so putrid and you're so close to it because the baby's up on a changing table it will change your stance on this it will is there something that we can invent masks the smell or is it like just like a clip or it's called breathing through your mouth nah yeah it's very effective there's gotta be something

when you go into like a men's room in like a kind of gross public maybe like a bar do you breathe through your nose I'd like to ask

really kind of deep and thought provoking questions here at the toast I mean yeah unless it smells like shit then I try not to

no you breathe through your mouth I always breathe through my nose oh so you obviously haven't mastered the task of this no that's not breathing through your mouth breathing through your mouth is just like whenever i go into i feel like everyone whenever you go into a public restroom that's like smelly you can get away without smelling it in through the nose out through the mouth well so you haven't mass you haven't through the nose, out through the mouth. Well, so you haven't mastered

the task of breathing through your mouth. That's what you should have been doing last night. It's possible. So were you breathing in through your nose the whole time when you were wiping up the shit? No, I was not breathing at all. I would wipe up the shit. I would exhale. I would take a towel, smell into the towel, get a deep breath, go back to the shit. One thing about us is that when we're podcasting together, like, we will end up talking about shit. It's me. I know, but then sometimes I think, like, sometimes with Jackie,

like, I'm always talking about poop. Like, maybe it's us. Jackie hates when we talk about poop. Sorry. Sorry, she's not here to yell at us. Sorry. Boop, boop, boop, boop, boop. Doody, doody, doody, doody, doody.

What do you call doody? Like, what's your go-to word? Poo, doody, poop? For humans's your go-to word? Poo, duty, poop? For humans, it's shit. For children, it's numero dos. For dogs, it's number two, right? What did I say, Theomeda? So you're bilingual.

Yeah, what do I say, Theomeda? Oh, you're so right. Yeah, number two, numero dos. What do I say for Theo? I like ubiquitously. Dump, dump. I ubiquitously use the word duty i use the word dump duty is such an underrated word it's good i also feel like how you refer to we have to stop talking about shit i'm sorry but i just want to say like how you refer to

poo is really indicative of like how you were raised because i feel like every family like what did your mom used to say? Number two. Okay, so we grew up in a duty household and that's why I always say duty. No. I always say like I have to go make a duty. No.

Okay, I'm changing the subject. I'm changing the subject. What's new with you? What's new with me? Just getting over this cold. Being a mogul. Trying to be a mogul. It's day three of no bread for passover by the way i hope

everyone had an amazing passover i'm definitely struggling and this is more than i've struggled or i usually struggle like day four or five i'm like you know are you struggling oh my god i'm so hungry and like nothing is doing more food i know but like what i can't eat any of the things that i love that's the thing matzo pizza which ben Italiano, it's so good, is the only thing getting me through. But, like, my favorite foods, bagels, pasta, pizza. You can do all those things with mozza. Ugh, mozza pasta. Also, by the way, you love grilled chicken. You can still eat it.

You love grilled salmon, sort of. You could still eat it. You love grilled chicken Caesar salads. You could still eat it. The hard part for me, to be honest, is the rice. Because like, I can't have rice. And yes, I love grilled chicken. But you know what I really love?

Grilled chicken and rice. You could have rice. No. Okay, so this is actually like a little kind of deep Jewish history lesson. Rice and corn and barley are called kiniyot. And technically, they're not like leavened, but there's two different kinds of Jews. They're either Sephardic or Ashkenaz.

Ashkenaz Jews hail from more like Eastern Europe, whereas Sephardic Jews hail more from like Middle East, Arab nations. Arab lands. Arab lands, like Morocco, Syria. So we are not of that descent, but Sephardic Jews who are of that more Middle Eastern descent, they can have kineos. So they don't even feel it.

They're over here having rice and churn and sushi. Sushi. And we're over here eating matzo pizza. And I just want to say, it's not fair. And I'm thinking about doing like Ancestry.com just to find like a deep, dark Sephardic relative. Because I think I'm going to start converting to Sephardism. You could do it anyways. You can eat rice i think i'm going to start converting to spartism you could do it anyways you can eat rice i'm not gonna lie isn't it just like isn't it just the rabbis

at this point telling us what we can and can't eat but at the base of it it's just no leavened bread right and then we added all these little things to make it more complicated the story of passover is you know, our people were slaves in Egypt for 400 years. And then Moses was like, I'm taking you guys out of here. Let my people go. So we were rushing to get out, rushing away. And we were trying to make some snacks for the road because, you know, we're Jewish and we were trying to make bread, but we had no time. The people were coming for us. So we just grabbed the bread before it could leaven in the oven. And was kind of like this nasty consistency it hadn't risen so it was like a cracker um and that's what matzah is it's unleavened bread and that's really what we're supposed to survive on

and so i understand why we can't eat leavened bread to commemorate what our people went through but like our people didn't even have rice like why the fuck did you have to bring that up rice wasn't even being spoken about because this is the ashkenaz rabbis taking it too far i think they wanted to make it they want to make it harder for us so we can really feel the pain of our people and i i respect that i do it's just it's really hard then why isn't there a fast good question that's your jewish history lesson of the day. When Moses was in Egypt land, let my people go. It's also shocking to me how few people who aren't Jewish haven't seen the film The Prince of Egypt. It's so breathtaking. It's so moving.

And it features one of the most iconic moments in pop culture history. A duo, a duet between Mariah Carey and Whitney Houston. What's that song? I forget. Can you look it up? What do they sing? What's the song? It's in the end, I think maybe they played in the credits.

It's really beautiful. It's deeply moving. And I think, you will when you believe. And Pentatonix actually has a cover. And, you know, I kind of hate Pentatonix. They have a cover that is so beautiful. It will move you to tears. I think Maren Morris is on it, too.

So that's just like fun fact about, you know, the film. If you haven't seen it, I highly recommend it. Are there people that haven't seen A Rugrats Passover? I think that that's just like a classic, like the kids saw it. There are people. That was a kind of an amazing thing that Rugrats did for us. Unbelievable. Rugrats was such a popular show at the time.

Everyone was watching it from all different backgrounds. And they did a big special explaining Passover for kids. And it was so cool for us. So cool. And I just want to say thanks. Yeah, thank you. Thank you, Rugrats. I felt so cool for us. So cool. And I just want to say thanks. Yeah, thank you. Thank you, Rugrats. I felt seen.

Me too. Me too. Thank you, Rugrats. Really seen. Thank you, Rugrats. We have great stories today, actually, because we haven't done a show since you and I did one on... Tuesday.

Tuesday. So we have a lot to catch up on. And there's a big story that I'm actually going to start with because I know how much it means to you. Yeah. So I think it's time. What do you think? For the past five stories.

That you need to know. Before you take a bite out of your morning toast. Oh, by the way. I get it. I know. Morning toast bite. That's why you eliminated it. On Tuesday.

But beat the crunch needs to come back. How about we'll keep it a tradition that whenever you're here, and because you're always so busy, you have like so many meetings, we have to record so early today. It kind of is morning toast. So whenever you're here, we because you're always so busy, you have like so many meetings, we have to record so early today. It kind of is morning toast. So whenever you're here, we'll do it, okay? Fine. So here are the fast five stories

that you need to know before you wake up and take a bite out of your morning toast. I don't know. That was tight. Vote in the comments. I don't know. Vote in the comments.

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spelled M-Y-K-I-T-S-C-H.com slash toast. That's mykitch.com slash toast for 30% off your order. Today's episode is also brought to you by Noom. Trends and fads come and go, especially when it comes to health and wellness. Noom is not a fad. They use psychology, not trends, to help you make intentional and sustainable choices that are aligned with your values and your weight loss goals So whatever your weight loss goals Maybe I know for me like a huge goal was just to feel better not so much about the scale even though that's some people's goal For me it wasn't me I was getting really fatigued getting bad headaches and so just like being more conscious about what I put in my body was really helpful

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Check out Noom's first book, The Noom Mindset, a deep dive into the psychology of behavior change. Available to buy now wherever books are sold. All right, are you ready for our first story that is really going to make you wet your pants? Please. I'll give you a clue, okay? Mm-hmm. Oh, wait, hang on.

Didn't we say like 10 minutes ago when I said something That this is a family friendly show But now I'm wetting my pants Over a story What's wrong with Wetting your pants It's a family friendly show Who wets their pants More than kids

Gotcha You did You thought I said Cream your pants Which I didn't You did Okay here's a clue For our first story

Ready Yeah I don't know why I'm like Hold on just be quiet Um Dum dum dum dum dum dum dum Dum dum dum dum dum I'm like, hold on, just be quiet. Dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum- come in with the face face melter well there's just one problem there the band is mine how can you kick me out of what is mine all right we have some school of rock news and i don't think there

is a show on the internet that is more obsessed with school of rock than we are obsessed and like have we spoken about the time that we saw it in theaters for my friend leo's birthday that was i actually think we have but just in case we have it because you know my memory is not the best during covid people did not take advantage enough of the fact that you could rent out an entire fucking movie theater for somewhere between 90 it was 99 99 for an old movie or 199 for a new one oh yeah but you didn't have to see a new movie you could literally choose a film because most theaters wouldn't open up to like sell individual seats but if you were a party you could literally rent a theater for 99 and 30 people it wasn't the height of covid but it was still very much like things were a little murky and your friend leor rented a movie theater for

his birthday and chose school of rock to watch everybody brought we brought like alcohol snacks i we brought the tailors it was like a free-for-all because there was uh such a big theater and there was only like 15 of us we brought the tailors we like packed a cooler it was so much fun and he that was probably one of the better birthdays in covid so fun yeah three dollars a person three bucks well it's not three dollars a person like 30 people no i know but elliot i mean not elliot leo just paid the 99 dollars yeah but i'm but I'm just simply sharing. And the concession stand was open. Yeah, it was.

It was lit. Which did hike up the price. It did, it did, but so worth it. Okay. I actually remember that. I remember that, thinking, wow, this is such a great, like, easy, cheap, fun birthday. Get to the concession stand. I spent $200.

I know, but that's you. Yeah, it is me. But I think it's everyone, too. No, but I have problems with that. I just end up buying snacks for people. No, that's not your problem. You're not too generous. I'm too generous.

No, you overordered. That's literally a lifelong problem. It's both problems. I overorder for myself, but I'm also far too generous with the snacks. I will give you an example. I spoke about this on Good Guys, but it was recently in the Bahamas. We spoke about- Wait, can I say one thing just as like kind of a podcast

mentor to you since you're you know you're so frequently on the toast especially this last couple weeks you've just been on a lot

and you have good guys I think it's important that you not be so repetitive because a lot of people who listen to this listen to good guys so I just that was just like

my piece of advice like before you repeat something make sure it's worth it so what should I do leave you want me to leave you're so funny

continue I'll say it quickly bahamas airport really hung over footlong quiznos egg and cheese and i just wanted you told the story on the toast too i did yeah finish it no i can't no finish it whatever i got a lot of Starbucks snacks for people. Move on. Okay. I told this story on the toast? You did. It might have been on Patreon, but you've told it because I heard it. I didn't tell it on the toast.

Yeah, you did. I remember we were sitting in Jackie's studio when I heard this story. Patreon. Yeah. Fine. Okay, ready for this story about Jack Black? Yes. Jack Black has confirmed in a recent interview with Entertainment Tonight that he is planning to reunite with his younger School of Rock co-stars later this year to celebrate the

20th anniversary of the comedy's release. Various cast members have reunited over the years, but it sounds like Jack Black is plotting an epic reunion to celebrate 20 years of School of Rock. Here's what he said. All those kids dig this. They were 10 years old when we made that movie, and now they're all like 30. We're going to get together and have a 20-year anniversary we like to jam i'm looking forward to seeing all the grown-ups from school of rock he added that he will 100 use social media to upload photos and videos for the oh from the upcoming reunion um

school of rock directed by richard link later and written by the white lotus oh i didn't realize it was written by ned schneebly i did oh i Oh I just thought he's had such an interesting career. You know he's a creator of White Lotus. I had no idea. You want to hear something crazy? Ned Schneebly was in School of Rock, and I think he had like a kind of you know not not exciting but like you know decent career. But things tapered off for him and he went on Survivor, that show, and he had this cult following from the show. He had like an epic season. I've never watched it but

I know it's like a historic season and he was like a real star in it. And he had this huge following from Survivor that really helped him get White Lotus off the ground. And now he's literally the darling of Hollywood. Everyone wants to be in next season of White Lotus. And I didn't even know that he wrote School of Rock. I mean it makes sense. He's obviously like a talented like creator and writer and more than just being an actor. and ned schniebly was a terrible character i know it was crazy that he wrote this amazing movie and cast himself as the most annoying human being on the planet actually sorry sarah silverman was the worst in that movie i don't know at least sarah sarah silverman stood for

something like ned stood for being annoying as hell she was a narc but like at least she had you know principles that she stuck to. Ned Schneebly was so wishy-washy, spineless. Who was the teacher again? Joan Cusack. Amazing. Love her. She's got to be in the reunion.

I love Joan Cusack. We were just talking about her the other day on the toast. Like, where is she? What's she up to? I'm just saying we have a direct in here because Josh and Miranda Cosgrove are friends. You have to get Miranda Cosgrove on the podcast after she does the reunion. Not before. No, we're doing it before because of iCarly. Oh yeah. Her and Josh are both on the iCarly reboot. Spoiler alert. Okay. Well, it sounds like this reunion is not going to be like a production.

It's going to be like an actual high school reunion, like everyone getting back together. It has to be a production. No, he says like, I will definitely share on social media. I know, but now that there's so much hype around it, somebody's going to come in. He will upload photos and videos from the upcoming reunion. It sounds like it's just like a get together probably at his house. The fuck? I know.

I love Jack Black. He's probably like one of the best celebrities. He's the best. Like there are people who are so universally famous and so down to earth but also like probably the biggest like i would consider like one of the greats right now it's like duane johnson yeah because he's in a lot of kids content so like everybody loves him and i think i would put jack black on that level too he's the best i love him the best multi-talented yeah you know you guys share something in common both singers and comics yeah tenacious d he's a big singer you don't know tenacious d his band no oh my god are you even a

jack black fan not as big as you oh my god calm down he literally has a band called tenacious d yeah and there's a movie tenacious d really uh-huh it's like a whole musical movie that but see that's what's you're right like about jack black like the fact that he's in school of rock which is one of the greatest comedies of our time and he's like this illustrious comedy career but he also like tugged at the heartstrings in the holiday which is a cult classic in the rom-com genre um shallow hell shallow hell we quote shallow hell every day hey now she's getting into my clams casino that movie's so good iconic iconic yeah because stans is in it tony robbins is in it gwyneth paltrow of course my queen that movie could never get made today because it's definitely problematic but i choose not to care or see it why is it more

problematic than love is blind because love is blind is not blind when you don't cast one fat person i've been saying that for years it won't be interesting like and i think the first season had like really interesting conversations, especially with Lauren and what is his name? Lauren and Blaine Hamilton, who are still married, because they were talking about how he was white, she was black. What would her family think about that?

What would have, like it presented an actual obstacle for them. Her dad was very trepidatious. It was an actual obstacle. When you just cast like average looking people who all look the same, like it's not interesting. I want a fat, I agree.

I want a fat person in there. I cannot wait for the School of Rock reunion. Although it does, it is like a little bit of a misleading headline. It's not like a friend's reunion. That was a great reunion. I need it taped. I need it taped as well.

Should we just sneak in? Totally. It'll be at probably Jack's house because he's like probably so rich. Yeah, I could go to Jack's. I mean, there's so many underrated stars in there miranda cosgrove joan cusack nudge nebley sarah selferman i cannot wait any other underrated stars oh very sad though you know recently um freddy the drummer he passed away oh i did hear that yeah that's really sad so hopefully they'll like you know commemorate him or something he Freddie was great. Yeah. Rest in peace. Just such a good movie. Unbelievable.

Great for kids and parents. I agree. I agree. It's the type of movie that actually gets better the older you get. Whereas a lot of things we like romanticize in our heads and then we rewatch it as adults.

We're like, that really wasn't that good. But School of Rock stands the test of time. It actually gets better the older you get. Same with High School Musical. Debatable. No, you're wrong Same with High School Musical. Debatable.

No, you're wrong. You don't give it a chance. Debatable. No. The originals are great. What do you mean, the originals? That's what I'm talking about.

No, like you watch like all this crap, like the new version. Okay, I haven't watched that in years. I'm talking about High School Musical 1, 2, and 3. 1 is good.

3 is the best movie you'll ever see in your life. I just... I want the rest of my life to feel just like a high school music i know that scene gives you goosebumps i love that scene i just like i really do want the rest of my life to feel like a high school musical. Don't you? Deep. Yeah, everyone should.

Exactly. Okay, ready for our next story? Yes. A little bit more potential, not really, reunion news. Apparently, according to Daily Mail,

Liam Payne is desperate for a One Direction reunion to relaunch his career and he's trying to get in contact with his former bandmates. So Liam Payne is reportedly desperate for a One Direction reunion to relaunch his career, and he's trying to get in contact with his former bandmates. So Liam Payne is reportedly desperate for a One Direction reunion. The pop star 29, who was in the group with Niall Horan, Harry Styles, Louis Tomlinson, and Zayn Malik, has been trying to get in contact with his former bandmates. It comes after Liam recently reunited with Louis at the premiere of his documentary, which was called All of These

Voices in London. The source said that Liam is desperate to get back on the road with the boys. His solo career hasn't remained as successful as he hoped it would, and work has become stagnant for him. In contrast, he can see how well Harry is doing, and he'd love that level of stardom for himself. Okay, who wouldn't? Yeah, you know what? I'd like the level of stardom that Amy Schumer has.

Like, we all want things liam get in line get to work you're far closer to schumer in my opinion than liam is to harry styles such a lie and so nice thank you i completely forgot that liam even existed i know it's like when if you would have asked me i'm always saying if you if you would have asked me when the boys broke up like who would have the biggest career i would have said harry that was like it was always it was never a question he really was the biggest star and he was so beloved by the audience but if you would have asked me like who would be struggling this much I would not have said Liam he was like at least vocally top three he was a favorite I wouldn't be shocked if you told me that Niall Horan would be

having the second best career second to Harry it just didn't pan out how I thought it would. Niall Horan is killing it. Killing it. We were watching the Masters yesterday. He was like on like talking about the Masters. Oh yeah, he's a big golfer. How he like shot an 81 at Augusta, which I'm going to need to see like some proof. Well, he's Irish.

It's a hard golf course. Isn't golf like a huge thing in Ireland? Yeah, but it's also a huge thing in the United States. Yeah, shooting in 81 at Augusta is just like so good such a hard course yeah and they like got it ready for the masters so the course is playing masters level yeah that's a regardless he must be amazing he must be amazing or he must be a liar or he's a liar yeah um I'm gonna lean on amazing one like fun fact about Ben and I that definitely makes me feel like we're better than other people is that we had the opportunity to see One Direction live at MetLife.

And not only was it incredible, they also were opened. The opening act was Five Seconds of Summer. And we weren't even Five Seconds of Summer crazy fans yet. But we went for the opener. And I think that really ignited our love. It did. And then we started to follow them around to weird venues across this country. No.

love and did and then we started to follow them around to like weird venues across this country no five seconds of summer like what their manager did to that band i agree i will never ever forgive it i don't they had a chance to be the pop punk gen z phenoms bring back like they could be blink 182 yeah instead they went down this like weird road with like trying to be alternative, trying to be mainstream. You don't have to be mainstream when you're awesome at something. Let me say how I actually don't think it was a management issue. I think like, A, they went through like a really bad scandal where that one of the members, Michael, was like had really kind of disgusting and terrible accusations against him about how he

treated underage fans like very inappropriately so that definitely rocked the boat and they were very much like doing what they wanted to be doing like any music they were putting out like was very much a band's decision and they were young and they were growing up and they were like going through different phases so i think they started to like put out music that wasn't like but it was still really good young blood i was just about to say say you want me adding a laugh young blood was the problem but that was their biggest song no their biggest song was you look so perfect standing there in my american apparel underwear yeah like or black heart because i've got a jet black heart and there's a hurricane underneath it we gotta rock out with our cocks out yeah we do we do we went to jones beach

i got claudia third row this was probably like six years ago i was the only guy in the entire arena only guy we were the only adults it was literally a concert for 13 year olds and that reason we got third row is because the tickets were like $25. It was so good. It was so good. We were rocking out so hard

with like all these kids around us. Yeah. Unbelievable. And I think that's also where they struggled. They had this like teeny bopper fan base. Great.

Grow up with them. Who just like weren't into it for much longer. They would because they changed their tune. It's also important to know they're an Australian band so their success in America

was like never, that's not their main beat. Really? Yeah. So interesting. I know. Like when they do tours, they usually do Europe,

like maybe America as an afterthought. They're not like an America first band. Australia is so interesting. I know. I'd love to go. It's just so far.

I know. I can't do it. So many like, so much amazing shit goes on in Australia. I mean, the toast is huge in Australia. Australia toaster, show yourselves. Auss ozzy ozzy ozzy ozzy and have you ever seen the movie you say oi oi oi oh i don't know that do it again ozzy ozzy ozzy oi oi oi i

don't know if that has to do with australia like whenever i try to do an australian accent it turns russian try good day mate how you doing I don't know. Can you do it? Good day, mate. That was pretty good. Yeah? Okay, now you're going into like... Good day. Like Slovenian.

Good day, mate. How you doing? Now you're just Southern. The only way that I know how to do it is that our friend is Australian and she calls me Bane. Yeah, no, she's not Australian. She's from New Zealand.

Sorry. And she's a toaster. Shout out, Maya. By the way, Australia, New Zealand. It's very offensive to do not say that. Really?

It's very problematic. Actually, I guess that's like somebody saying United States, Canada. And by the way, we don't claim. No, we're huge in Canada. Don't say it either.

No, by the way. And I love Canada. I can't wait to return. Viva Canada! I love Canadians too. But fuck Canada. it either no by the way i love canada i can't wait to return viva canada i love canadians too but fuck canada wow okay on let me say why today's episode you know i'm not you um what's the word i'm looking for by the way the canadians will respect why i don't like canada okay i don't like canada because every single day i get probably 200 DMs, bring Spritz Society

to Canada. And I want you to know that your government makes it impossible for anybody to bring beverages to Canada, which is why you have none of your favorite drinks. Yeah. None of them. And if you do have them, they're double the price because your government is the mafia on beverage. No, by the way, that's a fair critique.

But Canadians love them. Natalie. Oh, our friend Natalie's a Montrealan. Montrealan. No, and like Canada's so Jewish. We love Canada. The best. The best. Canadians come over here all the time. We're like their vacation destination.

It must be so fun to have a nearby country be America. Even though we have our problems and stuff, but it's so lit. It is lit. Actually, Canada's pretty lit too. Montreal's so fun. No, and I I haven't seen enough I want to go to Vancouver I hear Vancouver you have I have been do you have a show in Vancouver wow that's pretty cool yeah it didn't sell well so I didn't return for NLOG sorry yeah but like we'll we'll find another place but it's just interesting like another place in Canada to try next yeah there's very

beautiful parts of Canada yeah Vancouver iscouver is closest to seattle yes i drove from seattle or maybe it was portland i forget no seattle to it was three hours cool yeah very cool what were we talking about we were talking about let's go backwards because that was five seconds of summer oh one direction liam payne yeah so he wants the band to get back together and of course he does oh and just a reminder liam payne wants to be as famous as Harry Styles. That's what we're talking about. Yeah. And that's like makes him so different.

Like nobody wants that. Yeah. I mean, it's definitely tough to like have been at that level of fame with five of your like friends and to year after year, like kind of become more forgotten. And not only that, out of all of them, like Liam's solo career has become kind of like a meme on the internet, especially TikTok. There's all these videos of him that went viral

doing meet and greets. He kind of got parodied and his solo career has very much become a joke, which is tough when you see Harry Styles winning Grammy for Album of the Year.

Was it Simon Huck who put them all together? Simon Huck. I'm cracking up. Simon Cowell, yes. Simon Huck. Simon, you are just on my brain Simon Powell

who put them all together Simon Powell yes Cowell Cowell yes Simon Cowell yes it was

X Factor UK do you think he still gets like some money from them from One Direction yes and that was a part of like why they were so unhappy that happens a lot

i think people got hands in their pockets no it's like when you get famous on a show like that they when you sign up like you are agreeing to like these crazy record deal contracts that if you get a record deal after that's what i think um broke them up no no that's what i think philip phillips who had like the number one song for a really long time after he won american idol home what simon hug simon powell yeah i was trying to make a point but like whatever um that you get stuck in like really bad contracts after you're on those shows yeah but they're not still i mean even though i do think simon cowell makes residuals off of one direction's catalog of music still for sure what a visionary

though yeah c5 individuals push them together. Simon Cowell is who he is for a reason. He is who he is. Before we continue with the rest of the stories, let me let everyone know that today's episode is brought to you by The Perfect Bar. Spring cleaning your fridge should be fun, right? So why not toss out those dusty condiments

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Sign up for email or text and upload a picture of your receipt from your local grocery store, and they will reimburse you for the cost of one bar. It'll go directly into your PayPal or Venmo account. All you have to do is go to perfectsnacks.com slash toast to get a free Perfect Bar today. That's perfectsnacks.com slash toast to get a free Perfect Bar today. Happy snacking and happy free snacking. Today's episode is brought to you by Modern Fertility. For a lot of us, the start of a year can feel like the right time to schedule doctor's appointments and check in with where you're at health-wise. But what about your

reproductive health? We've always been a big fan of planning ahead, scheduling trips months in advance, plotting our next career moves, figuring out what we're doing for dinner while we're still eating lunch. But if you've never thought about planning for kids, modern fertility could be a great asset for you. Modern fertility was created as an easy and affordable way to test your fertility hormones at home with a simple finger prick. Mail it in with a prepaid label and you'll get a personalized result within six business days. You will get insight into your hormone levels like your ovarian reserve, aka if you have more or fewer eggs than the average woman your age. You'll also get other important factors that can impact your fertility. The results go deep into what every hormone means, and you can also download the results to review with your doctor for next

steps. Traditional hormone testing at a fertility clinic can cost over $600, but modern fertility tests are the same general set of hormones for only $179. And if you go to modernfertility.com slash toast, you'll get an extra $20 off your test. Plus you can get reimbursed for the test through your FSA or your HSA. So if you want kids today or maybe one day in the future, clinically sound information about your body can help you make the decision that's right for you. If you've done any sort of fertility testing, you know how kind of laborious and expensive the process can be. Modern fertility takes so much of the stress and expensive the process can be. Modern Fertility takes so much of the stress out of fertility testing because you do it from home. It takes six business days and the results come

right to your phone. Right now, Modern Fertility is offering our listeners $20 off the test when you go to modernfertility.com slash toast. That means your test will cost $159, which is a fraction of what it would cost at a fertility clinic. Get $20 off your fertility test when you go to modernfertility.com slash toast. That's modernfertility.com slash toast. All right, are you ready for our next story little? Oh, excuse me, no. I was literally holding it in for the ads. Oh, no.

You're welcome. Oh, no. You're welcome. I was holding it in. Ready for some TV news? Yes. That really nobody asked for. Kourtney Kardashian and Travis Barker

are sharing an inside look at their new wedding Hulu special. Hulu. I know I did say that weird. Wedding Hulu special. Kourtney Kardashian and Travis Barker

are giving fans an inside look at their luxurious wedding day in Italy in a new Hulu special. The streamer announced Tuesday that the couple were released

Till Death Do Us Part as an expansion of the famous family, the Kardashians. They said, this is our personal archive footage that we are sharing with the world. She says it in the trailer as footage of her and Travis. That was footage taken on their wedding day plays. Can you believe we got married three times? She adds, referring to their Las Vegas nuptials, their legal Santa Barbara court ceremony, and then finally their Portofino bash.

It's like choosing a child. I can't pick the best one, Travis says. So they're basically getting their own spinoff, which is just going to be like a limited run about their wedding. It does feel like, one, like who cares? And two, Kourtney has spent like the last three years on the Kardashians complaining

that she doesn't want to film. She wants boundaries, especially like around her family, her kids, which is totally respectable. So this kind of feels like a money grab. It just feels like really kind of, not to sound like such a troll, but like it feels so inauthentic. Like, come on.

Yeah. And they got married so long ago. I feel like so much has happened in the family since then. It just feels kind of dated too. Not to be like such a naysayer yeah I agree that's it that's all you have to say no I are you like a big Travis Barker fan yeah I mean I love Blink-182 I'm just like I'm just here thinking like they had three weddings and we were invited to none of them so true you had three options three opportunities. I really always forget, like there seems to be

a disconnect in my brain that like Travis Barker, who I know now as like Kardashian, who I know as like a legendary drummer, I forget that he is also where are you?

And I'm so sorry. Like that doesn't compute for me in my brain. Yeah, legend. I don't know why. Because he came into your world as a different type of person. What do you think is the best Blink-182 song? Oh, that's so tough.

Ooh. Maybe First Date. Are they? Maybe Dammit? Dear Maria, count me in. No. Who's that? Oh, God.

There's a story at the bottom of this bottle and I'm the pen. American Hi-Fi. She's just the flavor of the week. Who sings Dear Maria? I mean, I'll... Oh, God. No, no. This is embarrassing.

Okay, I won't tell you. Let me know if you can think of it. Oh, God. Dear Maria, count me in. There's a story at the bottom of this bottle and i'm the pen so much easier to just talk oh my god you're gonna like you're gonna be mad at yourself i know just tell me all-time low ah yeah damn it um but what do you think is the best blink-182 song i told you what damn it how does that go and first date how do those go like you have to sing them

pick it up on our very first date is it cool if i hold your hand is it lame if i didn't want to dance is that the chorus like my stupid hair then let's go don't wait this night's almost over honest let's make this night last forever forever and ever. This night lasts forever. In any sort of dream world, if you could have been anything at any time, would you have wanted to be a singer of a punk band in the 90s? Is that your dream life? I think that would have been awesome. But I don't know.

The more you learn, the more... It was dark. Yeah, you just like... I'd probably be have been awesome. But I don't know. Like, you just, like, the more you learn, the more. It was dark. Yeah, you just, like, I'd probably be addicted to drugs. Yeah, it was a very dark time for a lot of people. You, like, you only see, like, the good. You don't see, like, the. The trauma. Yeah.

Yeah, no, you're right. That's actually a really good way of thinking about it. Because I always say, like, I love my job. I have the best job in the world. But if I really could be doing anything, like like I would really want to be a singer like a pop star you could be a singer like when I see Taylor Swift like out here doing the heiress tour like I'm so why can't you be a singer we talk about this all the time I know I have too many things on my plate just sing no and the thing is like I know I have a really good singing voice

like not to be annoying like I know that I do but I am better I'm a stronger podcaster and comedian than I am a singer you could do both singing too shout out Allison Kaye sign her no I know let's do it I know let's do it I'm you could do it I know if I had your voice I would do it I can't my voice stinks wow finally you admitted okay today's show was a success okay sorry stinks in the realm of like having a career singing for the average joe it's pretty good it's pretty good yeah it's pretty good um so if you could be a lead singer of any band which one would what do you think is like the greatest punk I would either this isn't punk but it would either be the killers yeah, Fall Out Boy, or Blank. Those are my three.

Blank. You dropped the 182? Yeah. Okay. You got a problem with that? No, no. Do you always say Taylor Swift or you just say Taylor? I pretty much say Taylor Swift.

Interesting. Considering you are literally the nickname maestro, you literally call people nicknames when you don't even know them. So if you're someone to nicknames why don't you just call the killers the i'll call them killers i'll call them killers you call them just killers no i wouldn't because it doesn't work um but like the killers wow yeah i feel like of those bands i probably would want to be a lead singer of the killers because they have the most longevity fallout boys like i don't think they're together they had a resurgence they're together they're together they're playing at uh what's that they still tour i think they're playing at that is it

vans come again there's like a vans off the wall like crazy in vegas i don't know that's so fall out boy yeah they're like invented vans there's's something. But yeah, Pete Wentz. I mean. Legend. I'd love to be Pete Wentz. Yeah. I mean, I wouldn't love to be Pete Wentz. I'd love to be me in Pete Wentz's position. Job.

Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, well, Courtney and Travis have a new show coming. And if you care, I think you should watch it. Yes. Okay, so there were some dating rumors going around that I think you might find interesting. But now both people have come out and said it's completely not true. Tom Brady and Reese Witherspoon are not dating and apparently have never even met.

Their reps have told Page Six explicitly, the stars are not romantically involved, nor have they ever met. We're told that rumors that the newly single duo have their eyes on each other are completely false because shortly after Reese split from her husband of 12 years last month, an anonymous tip who used an email address, I mean, that's so funny, legallyblondeatpatriotsbuccaneers.com

claimed to do moi that an A-list actress who just announced her divorce is newly dating this A-list NFL athlete who was also recently divorced and people put the clues together. So I just think it's further, it's further proof that you really need to be cautious about what you consume in terms of internet anonymous gossip because yesterday

Dumas posted a blind that shook the world down about Kylie Jenner did you see no said that Kylie Jenner for a few months has been dating

Timothee Chalamet and people were shook because Timothee Chalamet is so the opposite of her type he's like very and was it not true we don't know but

now everyone's accepting it as true and everybody accepted this Tom Brady and Reese Witherspoon thing is true all you gotta do is read the comments on

Instagram to know if something's true or not what do you mean like I love when it's not only page six it's all of like there are other versions of page six

but you'll go you'll see some crazy headline and it'll say click the link in bio to read the full story but i'll just go to the comments and somebody will sum it up oh yeah yeah yeah but it's like so funny i saw that exact one where it's like the headline reese witherspoon dates tom brady i'm thinking myself what the hell that's so strange and i go to the comment section it literally what what i would have clicked on to read was their source close to the two have said they've never met yeah no like how is that a headline then yeah I actually feel like that's

a good point how like the Instagram comment section kind of like fucks with e-news or all these publications because they say click the link in our bio to read the full story and you can get a summary of the story in the comments you never got to click it it actually happened to me yesterday was a little bit embarrassing there's a an account that i follow called zire golf amazing like golf account and there was this video that was posted out of context and i should have known better where it looked like colin morikawa amazing amazing golfer amazing i don't know where he's ranked right now but amazing uh it looked like he moved his ball he's on the green and it looked like he cheated it looked like he moved his ball. He's on the green. And it looked like he cheated. It looked like he cheated. He moved the ball.

Yeah. Looked like he moved the ball. That's a big deal. It was a big deal. So I commented, how can you be so stupid to do that on television? Right. Like I get when guys cheat, like when nobody's watching. Oh, but there was more context?

Yeah. Oh, did they rip you to shreds? They roasted me. But I'd say 99 99 of people just liked it thought it was funny and agreed but then like these like golf book yeah like nerds below were like did you even watch he was replacing where it was win pushed it legally allowed to move it back and so it just goes to show that if you don't have the full story try and get it before you comment i actually have a similar embarrassing sports comment section story. When we

were in the playoffs with the Niners and we were just like both you know really being supportive of the 49ers, they were playing the Cowboys and they commented like, Who's ready for next week in Dallas? Like they posted something on Instagram. And I was like, Yeah! We them boys! Like that's what me and Jackie always say. Like we them boys. We making noise. And apparently. That's Dallas. That's like the Dallas slogan.

Who knew that? Everyone's commenting, get a job. That's their favorite thing. Oh my God. If I never hear that again, it'll be too soon. It's so annoying. How can you comment on golf if you're unemployed? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Like, oh my God. It's so, every time I comment on pretty much every single luke combs post and he posted the other day like out of these two songs which should i send as my next single to country radio and i commented a third different song i want you found yours to be it commented what do you know you don't even have a job no it's so stupid shut up also like people in person like oh god they'll come up and they'll say, oh, congrats on Spritz Society. It looks like you found a job. Oh, by the way, that is like the go-to mostly for like older people who think it's like a really funny original joke. When it comes from like a friend's parent, it doesn't bother me.

But like when it comes from somebody who's like actually like knowledgeable and young and like understands the landscape, it looks like, oh, you have a call, but you don't have a job. Shut up. So dumb. And like any press, it's like, boy with many jobs. Oh, yeah. No, whenever you do an interview, it's like,

you're actually pretty busy for a girl with no job. It's enough. It's enough to make me change the handle. Enough. It's enough. Enough. Are you ready for our fifth and final story that, like I said previously, hopefully will make you wet your pants?

Yes. It's brought to you by Thrive Market. Thrive Market is our go-to for all of our grocery and household essentials, and the convenience of getting it all quickly shipped to our doorstep is a huge time saver. So when you become a Thrive Market member, as Jackie and I both are, you can save money on every single order. On average, we're saving over 30% every time. So of course they offer massive savings, but they also have a deals page that changes daily.

So you can get cash back on so many brands and they have a price match guarantee. They also are a great place just to discover new brands. I feel like I used to be very rigid in terms of what I ate. You know, I'm very picky and I just order the same stuff and I get the same brands. But Thrive really made me comfortable to like branch out

and I have fallen in love with so many brands for food, but also for like house supplies, cleaning supplies supplies things I need for the house things I need for Theo um not only does Thrive Market save us money but they also save us time the filters on their website there's over 70 are really helpful so whether you're looking for gluten-free snacks non-toxic cleaning essentials you can basically curate your own shopping experience with the click of a button so when you join Thrive Market you are also helping a family in need because they have a one-for-one membership matching program. So you join the program and they give a membership to a family in need, which is fabulous. You can feel good about

getting fabulous things for your home, helping others in need. And it also was just shipped right to your door. Join Thrive Market today and you'll get 30% off your first order plus a free $60 gift. Go to thrivemarket.com slash the toast for 30% off your first order plus a free $60 gift. Go to thrivemarket.com slash the toast for 30% off your first order plus a free $60 gift. That's T-H-R-I-V-E market.com slash the toast. Thrivemarket.com slash the toast. Jackie is like now at a place where she's getting like

three Thrive Market deliveries a day because she has like, you know, a child to feed and she has this big old kitchen. And every time I'm on FaceTime with her, she is unboxing a new Thrive Market. It's crazy that when you said cash back, my brain immediately, when I hear the word cash now, if you need long-term payments and you need cash now.

Call J.G. Wentworth. 877-CASH-NOW. It's crazy. Such a good song. Unbelievable. For our fifth and final story, I have like a crazy human interest story that I think you're going to find really interesting. Interested. A gynecologist has revealed the most shocking thing he's found inside a vagina.

A gynecologist in Honduras was flabbergasted to discover a cockroach lurking inside a patient's vagina. inside a patient's vagina. So Dr. Marco Calix, who is an OBGYN based in Tegucigalpa, told the JAM press about the unlikely infestation. She said she had something unusual in her vagina. The doctor described

how the unnamed patient who hailed from a rural part of the country arrived at his clinic extremely restless, agitated, and sweaty. She explained how she'd been having trouble sleeping

due to something extremely strange in her vagina. A subsequent inspection revealed the shocking culprit behind the woman's discomfort. When I introduced the speculum, I could see that it was an insect. In fact, I had to take out something like a cockroach. This marked a first for the seasoned doctor who had previously discovered everything from condoms to sex toys inside the female reproductive organs. It's yet unclear how the cucaracha was reportedly who was reportedly dead before he remediated a dead cockroach managed to end up down under however the organ exterminator site states that cockroaches tend to prefer dark moist places to hide and breed and they can flatten their bodies to fit into narrow areas i just feel like that last

part the new york post did not have to put in that they prefer dark moist places no it was definitely intense is the story over or can i comment please comment i mean talk about giving women another thing to worry about like no but it's also crazy like cockroaches don't die yeah i know how did they die how did it die cockroaches can survive a nuclear bomb that's what we've been told yeah i mean we don't know because no but isn't it crazy that we all know that why do we all know that i don't know i feel like that's like one of those things yeah and like is it even true they also say that cockroaches were like alive during like dinosaur years were they oh yeah cockroaches are they're like crocodiles they will outlive us all. Cockroaches, crocodiles. Crocodiles?

Alligators are like, I don't know if it's, what's the difference between crocodile and alligator? Amazing question. I have no idea. I think it's based on where they live.

Alligators are, they won't call them dinosaurs, but they're dinosaurs. What? They've been around forever. Wait, I didn't know that. Yeah,

isn't that crazy? They've been around since the day of the dinosaur? Yes. Fact. I like don't believe dinosaurs are real. I mean. Is that like a hot take?

It's just a dumb take. Oh, is it? Okay. We have the bones. No, I know. But like they could have like faked it. All the bones? I just refuse to believe there was a time where like literally the biggest animal, like

three times the size of an elephant, which is current. What's the biggest animal right now? An elephant? Oh, a whale. Yeah. What's the biggest animal right now? An elephant? Oh, a whale. Yeah. So dinosaur was as big as like a great white. Think about how big these sea animals are. Yeah, I guess the sea ones.

And don't put me down this rabbit hole. No, I know. Because I'm just saying we have not even begun to scratch the surface of exploring the seas. Yeah, no, you're right. And what could be in those seas? Could be like a freaking animal

the size of the Empire State Building. That's true. Who knows? That's true. Who knows? But what was the story? Oh, you're right. And what could be in those C's? Could be like a freaking animal the size of the Empire State Building. That's true. Who knows? That's true. Who knows? But what was the story? Oh, the cockroach. The cockroach.

I mean, I feel like I've heard stories, even people I know who've gotten like tampons stuck in their vagina. He said sex toys, condoms. I've heard that. I was really not, the headline was, gynecologist reveals craziest thing he's done. I was not expecting it to be a cockroach. And now I just, I feel like we live in New York. There's so many cockroaches.

I have to really, I have to have my legs sewn shut. Where was she? Where was she from? Oh, he was from Honduras and she was a patient who came in from like a really rural part of the country. Makes me sad because she was probably like sleeping with cockroaches. No, she was probably really uncomfortable for, if he died in there, like. No, I'm saying in order for a cockroach to get up your nether regions, need to be infested yeah right which is sad it's actually a sad story it's a very

sad story I'm glad she got the help she needed yeah me too and I hope he didn't lay any eggs oh I didn't even think about that they said dark moist areas is where cockroaches like to lay eggs oh god terrible oh yeah terrible story also are there, why aren't there more female gynecologists? I feel like there are a ton. There are? Yeah, like, I would say. Are there more than men? I don't know if statistically, but I have to imagine that more than half of gynecologists are women. It just makes more sense. You'd think that they'd know more about their own nether regions than what you could read in a book. I definitely think, you know, men and women can both do equal things,

but like when I'm picking a gynecologist, like I'm picking a woman. I'm actively avoiding men. My gynecologist is a woman and the whole practice is women, so it's like she's out,

okay, I'll see one of the other women. Makes sense to me. Excuse me, your uncle is a gynecologist. Correct. And he's a great, didn't he deliver you?

No. Definitely not. I guess that would be weird. Very weird. For him to be like in your mom's. Yeah, that would be very weird. Correct. And he's a great didn't he deliver you? No. Definitely not. I guess that would be weird like. Very weird. For him to be like in your mom's. Yeah that would be

very weird. Yeah. I'm just saying. I wonder how that goes when you have a gynecologist in the family. Did Uncle Jeffrey deliver any of your

cousin's babies? I don't think so. Hmm. Because I guess it's like a little personal. I think so. Maybe I'll have to have Uncle Jeffrey on the podcast

to ask him. Yeah we could. Yeah. You could. Cool. Yeah. Maybe I'll have to have Uncle Jeffrey on the podcast to ask him. Yeah we could. Yeah. You could. Cool. Yeah. What were you about to say?

No. Nothing. Male gynecologist. No I was just saying that like I think it's like a little weird. I definitely think it's a suspicious choice.

Yeah. For sure. A little weird. If you could become any I feel like I keep making the stories and being like if you could be in any band. If I could be any kind of doctor? I keep making the stories and being like, if you could be in any band.

If I could be any kind of doctor? Yeah, what kind of doctor would you want to be? Huh. Am I financially motivated or am I? You're all things motivated. All things motivated. Take into account money, everything. What kind of doctor?

I like the idea of like a really, really high profile surgeon. I know, but it's a lot of pressure. I know, but you not only make a lot of money, but you also like save lives. Like how cool is it to be a doctor? Yeah, well, I would have 100% success rate. Oh, okay. In this fantasy land?

Okay. I would make sure of it. Yeah. I would have my own jingle Like I feel like Kind of a low pressure Doctor job Is like a dermatologist

I feel like nobody dies On the dermatology table You know That's true But dermatologists Are also No if you're like A cosmetic dermatologist

And you do like Botox You make a lot of money No I'm not saying that I'm just like I kind of think of them As like dentists And like Jill Biden well okay let's talk you upset a lot of people on the show on Friday I did yes there were

two things you said and one of them I actually agree with people the first thing you said was you weren't giving nearly enough hype to LSU it was like such a big deal they won like a lot of people were interested in got it so let's start there yeah go L Go LSU. LSU Tigers. Shaquille O'Neal. Love Shaq. He went to LSU. Kim McKay, who also is the coach. Yeah. She also went viral.

Awesome. So we both were wrong in saying that everyone was only tuning in for Kaitlyn Clark. No, no, no. Sorry. I did not realize that that was the gripe. Everyone was only tuning in for Kaitlyn Clark. Go LSU. For sure.

Statistically, unless you guys don't like statistics, if it was a non-Caitlin Clark national championship, it would not have broken these records. She was the one who went viral on TikTok. She was the one who dropped back-to-back 40-point games. She was the one who is having the greatest career in the history of women's college basketball people tuned in for caitlyn clark that said go lsu so you stand by what you

said it's a it there's nothing to stand by it's statistics and then the other thing people were a little miffed by was you saying one that dentists aren't real doctors and i think people they're not and i love them no i think people probably misunderstood what you said like you're still a doctor of dentistry but it's like if you're on a plane and you need a doctor the dentist isn't standing up and saving any lives that's exactly right right and then people were also upset that you said a PhD is not a real doctor and those people need to get a fucking grip because you can't be a doctor of math that's exactly you can't be a doctor of math yeah and also save a life they just need it just needs to be a different word. I agree having a doctorate in something It's a huge accomplishment. When somebody says I need a doctor you can't do shit that person's not gonna do anything. It's a huge accomplishment

I don't know why it's the same word Why yeah, you're not Ross Geller. You're not an MD and you know, Dr. Drake Ramore are both doctors You're not an MD. And you know, Dr. Drake Ramore are both doctors. That was a good comparison. It's weird. It's weird. It just is misleading. So you're just making enemies left and right every time you come on the toast.

How does that feel? Good. Good. Good. Keep talking about me. Thank you so much for being here. I love podcasting with you. Same.

And this was our last show of the week. Hope everybody got through the week okay without the toast. But we're back and we're back on Monday. So we love you dearly. Thank you so much for listening to The Toast, the Millennial Morning Show where we deliver the past five stories

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happy Good Friday and Easter oh shit oh my god I'm so like self involved as a Jew happy Good Friday he has risen

and happy Easter wishing love and light and I think it's also Ramadan it is yes it's kind of like a big and happy Ramadan

it's a big month for all the religions I was just gonna say if you need or it's not Ramadan but I think it's kind of like a happy Ramadan it's a big month for all the religions I was just gonna say if you need it's not Ramadan but I think it's coming up because I saw on my google calendar it said eyed so wishing well wishing well to everyone yes happy everything have a great weekend and we'll see you on Monday bye