The Toast - The Rise and Fall of Nikki Blonsky: Monday, March 24th, 2025
Episode Date: March 24, 2025JonasCon takes over American Dream with Jonas Brothers concerts, events, food and more (NorthJersey) (27:05)Drake Bell appears on Good Guys podcast (35:07)Logan and Jake Paul Love Lives on Fu...ll Display For TV Show (TMZ) (43:02)Amy Schumer back on weight loss drugs after 'horrible experience' with Wegovy (Page Six) (48:09)Tiger Woods confirms romance with Vanessa Trump (Page Six) (57:34)The White Lotus Recap (1:01:50)The Toast with Jackie (@JackieOshry) and Claudia Oshry (@girlwithnojob) Lean InThe Camper and The Counselor by Jackie OshryMerchThe Toast PatreonGirl With No Job by Claudia OshrySee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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It's Jackson Claude and we're your hosts.
It's your favorite show, the fast five things you need to know.
We'll start your day off swirly.
It's the toast.
I sound amazing.
Welcome back to the toast and happy. Oh, what is oh, Monday. Am I okay? I was about to think Tuesday. I don't know why I would think such a thing.
There's never been such a Monday in the history of Mondays.
Let's try that again. Welcome back to the toast. Happy Monday.
Turti Lou Freebush here.
Excited to be sitting down with one of the world's leading Disney adults.
It is my sister, my co-host.
If only that were true, Claudia.
If only that were true.
Like last time we went to Disney,
we went to Disney a year ago.
Now that we live in Florida,
I do think it's like an annual thing.
One, our passes are so cheap when you're a Florida resident.
Cause I guess like some of our taxes go towards Disney,
so we get kickbacks.
I'm not complaining.
I had the same takeaway last year,
which is that I am not the elk of a Disney person.
Like I'm having fun because my children are having fun
and I'm happy to be here
and it is the happiest place on earth.
But I am not made of the stuff that Olivia Acher is made of
and that my husband is made of
where they thrive in a Disney like environment.
It's important that when going to Disney with the kids
and taking it, you know, taking on this journey,
and again, I've never done it,
but it's important that there are people in the group
who can handle it and people in the group that can't.
I just feel like that dynamic is really important
to balance each other out.
Yeah, everyone has their strengths.
This time, I didn't go on a lot of rides
because I'm a nauseous queen,
and I watched the stuff
and I got the food.
So every time they came off a ride pretzel.
It's really nice to be the person who-
Diet Coke, you have found your bottle.
Whose job it is to watch the stuff.
The thing is they have stroller parking at Disney
and this is actually like to Disney's credit.
You just like park your stroller at stroller parking
and you go on the ride and you enjoy your life.
And there's really like, I mean, I don't know
but there's like not crime at Disney.
No one's like pillaging the strollers
that are filled with stuff.
I'm sure you could find everyone's everything in there,
but it's really like we're operating on the honor policy
and it works quite well.
Well, to any aspiring criminals listening,
it seems like Disney is ripe with opportunity.
The only problem is it's so expensive to get in the park.
How are you gonna-
I don't know if you can make up for your tickets.
Especially if you're not a Florida resident
and you're not getting those savings.
Right, and it's not like the New York City subway
where you can just sort of like hop the turnstiles.
Like they have maximum security.
Heck no, it's maximum security at every turn.
And I do think seasoned Disney people,
which everyone there is,
they don't keep valuables in their stroller.
People's got their fanny pack.
No, of course not.
They wear their fanny pack on the ride
that has their room key and their money.
That's so classic.
Yeah, so people have it games.
But no, it really is lovely
that that's actually not a concern there.
You don't need someone to watch the stuff,
though I'm always happy to offer.
I love, my favorite thing when being at an outing
is being the person whose job it is
to sit and watch the stuff.
Now this is my question for you
because obviously I haven't been to Disney
as a grown person.
I went one time, like when me and Ben first started dating,
I was doing a work thing in Orlando
and he made me go and I had seriously
the worst fucking time of my life.
So when I think about the future, obviously,
as a parent one day, it's sort of a rite of passage.
You have to take your kids to Disney.
I definitely really worry about the amount of like
standing and walking like on my body.
And I'm just curious if you feel like there's an adequate
amount of seating available.
Like, are there lots of benches?
Like I feel like I would always be looking for a place
to sit and not being able to find one.
And that's what concerns me about the future.
There are a lot of benches.
There are a lot of like perches where there's like trees.
Like a fountain you can sit on.
Yeah, like there's seating.
What I would like a little bit more of,
though I know it's tough,
given the natural elements, a little more shade.
I got a sunburn, I guess it's also
because I was wearing a t-shirt
that when I went to Linky yesterday on my LTK,
like it is a sleep shirt,
but it was the right shade of blue.
So it was like very flimsy.
It's a type of sleep shirt where you wake up with a t of blue. So it was like very flimsy. It's a type of sleep shirt where you wake up
with the titty out.
Yeah, it was like flimsy and thin.
So not only was like my chest exposed,
but I don't even know, like it's not for sun.
So I did get a bit of a sunburn night
and I do appreciate shade,
but I know it just depends on the solstice and the trees.
But there are nice-
So much is dependent on the solstice.
Yeah, there are places in which to sit, but there is a lot of walking and that's just the trees. Of course. But there are nice- So much is dependent on the solstice. Yeah, there are places in which to sit,
but there is a lot of walking and that's just the deal.
However, you know there is Disney VIP, right?
Yes, I know all the celebs do Disney VIP.
I heard it's like $5,000 a day and that's insane.
Yeah, I think it's like, I guess we only go for two days,
so that's why it's like quoted at $10,000.
That's insane.
Well, maybe.
But do you get a golf cart?
Perhaps not so insane.
This time I was, that Disney VIP was looking good.
Yeah, of course.
But like, what's VIP about it?
They help you like cut the lines and stuff
or do you get a trolley?
I'm pretty sure it's like no lines, easy entrance,
like back entrance into the park, no lines there again.
When there's the parade and the show at the castle
and everything, the fireworks you are front row,
like all the way to the top.
If I were to ever do VIP, we need to be with more people
so that we're really getting them being for our buck.
And when the kids are a little older
and they actually do more rides right now,
we just like, you know, futz around on Finding Nemo.
Like that's not what the lines are for.
Yeah, no, that's not VIP worthy.
Yeah, so that's the takeaway.
One day I will do it though,
and I'll let you guys know how it is.
Well, I like that you got dressed for the occasion
with your Disney outfits.
Like you were giving Disney adult,
but it's nice to know that beyond the facade
of your Instagram story, like there was a woman suffering.
Yeah, I am not a Disney adult.
And I don't say that with pride, you know?
No, no, I just wanna say the reason I keep calling Jackie
a Disney adult is because as a protective mama bear,
like you don't post your kids on social media.
So it literally looks like you and Zach and Olivia and Zach
went to Disney's The Four of You.
Disney's The Four of Us just bopping around Epcot.
Yeah, and so that's why I keep calling you a Disney adult.
But if you knew the real subtext,
you would know it's because Jackie's a queen.
Yeah, I understand that and I can take that.
And I just wanna say like being a Disney adult
means a lot of things.
Of course, mental illness, but it means you have strength. I understand that and I can take that. And I just wanna say like being a Disney adult like means a lot of things.
Of course, of course mental illness,
but it means you have strength.
It means you have fortitude.
Like, could I say it also means you have courage
like because you don't give a fuck what people say about you.
There's so many, I feel like it's really become
like within popular culture, like jokes about,
I see it on like every like late night show now.
Like Disney adults is kind of like the punching bag
of society.
And let me tell you, they kind of just take it.
You need to have a really strong sense of self
to be a proud Disney adult.
Yeah, it's very true.
I was actually like looking around
and I was thinking like, it's the happiest place on earth.
And it really is like, even if you're tired,
you're in a bad mood, like you can't help but be like
cheered up by the music and the vibes.
And it's like-
The joy.
What if they just like went to Disney every day
and just like live like, you know.
People do that.
And just like enjoyed it all the time.
And yet, no, unless that's how you become a crazy person
because like it's not the real world.
But I understand why people want to do that.
Like why can't every day be a day at Disney?
I understand like the feeling of wanting that.
Yeah, so I don't follow her, but this girl always comes up on my TikTok. She is like the feeling of wanting that. Yeah. So I, um, I don't follow her,
but this girl always comes up on my TikTok.
She is like a bona fide Disney adult.
She and her family moved to Orlando to be near the park.
And so she'll like drop her kids off at school and she'll be
like, all right, let's go on a walk.
And she goes on a walk in the parking.
She gets like, she's like, I want to get my,
I'm trying to do 10,000 steps.
And so it's just like, it's her park,
like where you would go for a central park walk.
She's going to Disney.
Yeah. No, but it really will make you a crazy person,
like thinking that that's how the world is,
that you don't have to look over your back,
that no one's, you're really Amy Adams in Enchanted,
like walking around with your head up your ass.
That's hilarious.
That's what it is.
That's, you know what?
It's nice.
She's a quintessential Disney adult.
I kind of get it.
I do get it, but you have to be cautious. Of course, it's a slippery slope.
You need like the right dose of real world and a sprinkle of Dizz.
And because you've decided to like make it like a max once a year type of thing,
but our sister Olivia, who is like probably I would have thought like the least person I would
suspect to become a Disney adult. But meanwhile, she like loves it so much. She thrives. She thrives.
Do you think like she itches,
like she's counting down the minutes till next summer
or like she, I mean, she could go without you,
but it's obviously more fun to go with all the kids together.
Well, she was going this weekend.
She's like, I think we're gonna go to Disney this weekend.
Like it just works out timing wise.
The weather's gonna be really good.
Like we're gonna go, do you wanna come?
And I couldn't say no because I knew it would be amazing,
but it was really like her trip and we just hopped on.
She was itching. She was itching.
She was itching.
She was itching, but she would have gone without me.
Right, right.
It's like if we had plans,
if this was the weekend that I had a wedding,
if this was the weekend I'm in New York,
like she would have been going without me.
Well, Santa's coming to town, by the way.
I know, I'm coming to New York this week.
Bright lights, big titties, Jackson cleared.
Straight from Orlando, straight to New York.
Jackie's never been to my studio.
You haven't seen the new digs.
We're gonna be filming here this week,
which I'm so excited about.
We've lots of fun and exciting projects.
We're filming a commercial.
We are.
I'm like really like leading a life of regret.
Yeah, because well, first of all,
my Makatonim sister is getting married this weekend.
Makatonim sister that we've been talking about.
Ben sister, I'm sorry you guys are crazy.
Ben sister.
Thank you.
Is getting married this weekend.
So Jax is coming to town
and of course Jax never comes to town.
So when she does, we like have to, you know,
check off a bunch of things on our list.
So much so to the point where we can't even enjoy
the weekend because now we have a million things.
We're interviewing somebody for the podcast.
We have a merch photo shoot.
We have a commercial photo, like why?
Why?
And now the Redheads are like,
let's record in person on Saturday.
Oh, no, Saturday we're supposed to hang.
No, I said Saturday is my one free day to enjoy.
I actually, I'm gonna think about it,
I'll let you guys know.
Yeah, sorry Redheads, take a back seat.
I feel like the Redhead community will be okay
if I push the episode back a week,
as opposed to giving up my Saturday when,
I literally will not have one free moment in New York.
And that's why I'm leading a life of regret
because like, I just get so excited.
I'm like work like boss, babe.
Like I'm literally landing and getting a haircut.
Like I'm just, it's crazy talk.
That's really crazy letting you get a haircut.
I know, but I want a haircut for Thursday.
Like I want to share it.
Yeah, of course, of course, of course.
So duh, gotta get a haircut when I land
at the middle of the night.
Well, it'll be an exciting weekend,
a week for the Choasters, Jackson Club together
in the big city.
It will be an exciting week for the business.
I just like, I just feel like unbalanced, you know?
I feel like I'm grinding too hard.
How many bags did you pack?
You think I packed already?
How many bags did you pack?
Three.
How many bucks did you pack?
Two.
And how many of yourselves are you bringing?
Actually three.
Three bucks, two bags, one, oh my God.
Speaking of musicals, something we have to talk about
that's going on online.
Nicky Blonsky.
Thank you so much, you read my mind.
Every day we wrap the show, I'm like,
fuck, we didn't talk about Nicky Blonsky.
Which is so crazy because when nobody's talking about Nicky Blonsky, we are talking about Nicky Blonsky. Which is so crazy because when nobody's talking
about Nikki Blonsky, we are talking about Nikki Blonsky.
But now everybody's talking about Nikki Blonsky
and we've kind of like not been a leading news source.
And by the way, like the silence is deafening from us.
So she's kind of having an organic moment on social media
where a lot of like her crazy behavior
over the last 15 years since Hairspray came out is just being revisited, like wild interviews, a lot of, she's behavior over the last 15 years since hairspray came out
is just being revisited like wild interviews a lot of she's been on cameo for a while and I guess
if you're like us and you like love Nikki Blonsky I'm surprised we don't have one like a cameo for
Nikki Blonsky. Are they now going like a thousand dollars a pop now? She better have increased.
She's the number two the last time I checked the number two most requested person on cameo.
I don't know how much she's charging. Hold on. She better be charging minimum $1,000.
Nikki, get your bag.
Nikki, because now everyone's gonna want one.
Nikki Blonsky, Cameo, $100.
Nikki!
She has 2,000 reviews.
Wow, she's done a lot.
I also wanna say, I know everyone says this about everyone,
but I don't say it lightly.
And I mean it when I say it,
that Nikki Blonsky does need to be cast
on the next season of White Lotus.
Like that's how we can make things right.
Heal.
In this world.
Okay, so let me tell you,
if you guys don't know what's going on,
this really originated on TikTok,
but it's definitely like taking the entire internet by storm.
Just like this really organic movement of like-
Grassroots movement.
Of just identifying and looking at Nikki Blonsky's career
at a glance and how strange the whole thing was, right?
If you don't know, she played Tracy Turmblatt
in like the most recent adaptation of Hairspray,
which is the best one, alongside Zac Efron.
Exciting Hairspray Live.
Alongside Zac Efron, Amanda Bynes, like a star-studded cast.
And she was cast through like an open casting call.
She was a hairdresser in New Jersey.
As Tracy O'Neil is.
It was totally kind of like a fairy tale, right?
Plucked from obscurity, big Hollywood production,
you're kissing Zac Efron.
Like it's literally, you actually can't even write
a fairy tale as story because that.
Tracy, I'm in love with you no matter what you weigh.
Without love.
I like how Tracy always has to be at casting,
at open casting, because like,
God forbid they made a fat person famous,
up until recently.
Now,
now everyone's talking about,
when she was on the PR train for Hairspray, at the time, I don't know if anybody thought anything of it,
but with hindsight, she was doing
and saying a lot of weird things,
mostly about Zac Efron.
She was clearly in love with him,
because again, this was an actual regular person
starring alongside, think about Zac Efron at the time,
like off the heels of high school musical,
like a true teenage heartthrob.
She's just a regular girl.
It's that she was like the type of girl
who would go to like a Jonas Brothers concert
and shave her vagina,
like thinking that they were gonna have sex,
but like this was actually a real moment for her.
So she was like really bizarre on that press tour.
He was with Vanessa Ann Hudgens at the time,
and she was just like on the Wendy Williams show
telling everyone that like Zach and Vanessa
aren't gonna last.
Like I think she really thought that like
he was her boyfriend.
I think she had a hard time distinguishing
between the movie.
I just wanna also say, like in defense of Nikki,
Zach does this.
And I've seen some of his clips from that time
where he's kind of leading her on,
but every time he's in a movie,
he pretends like he's in love with the girl, the lead.
He did it with Zendaya in Greatest Showman.
He did it for Baywatch.
He does it for everything.
And he did it with Nikki.
I'm like, I'm sorry, she's the kind of girl,
if you give her an inch, she's gonna take a mile.
That's actually a really good point.
I'm here to defend.
So then like everything Nikki Blonsky's ever put out
on social media is now under a microscope,
like her incredibly bizarre tweets,
her cameos, of course.
And she's just kind of this person
who really spiraled downward after hairspray.
And I actually did not know that like she had a big scandal.
Oh, I didn't know that either,
but also I need you to clarify spiral downward
because it seems like this has been her personality
since hairspray.
So you just mean like her career not ascending.
Yes, yes, her career not ascending.
But I did forget, like, I guess there was like a,
she had a little bit of momentum after Hairspray.
It's not like she did Hairspray and nothing happened.
I had totally forgotten.
And now that people are resurging it,
I saw the, I saw like an old trailer.
It was like an ABC Family commercial for a new show
they were doing called Huge.
And it was about a fat camp
and Nikki Blonsky is the main character
and like all the characters are fat.
And it's like the craziest wildest thing.
And so she had a TV show on ABC Family.
I think there was like a little bit of momentum for her.
And then she ended up in a big scandal
in the Turks and Caicos Airport
where her and her family got into like a physical
and verbal fight with this other passenger
who happened to be a girl who either one
or was a contestant on America's Next Top Model. She also just who happened to be a girl who either one or was a contestant on
America's Next Top Model. She also just like happened to be famous. There were some racial
slurs thrown at this girl's family by Nikki and her mother. It was mostly Nikki's mother,
but Nikki was there too. And that kind of put a halt in all the momentum that Nikki was gathering
at the time. And now I think what we're seeing is like
the direct fallout of that.
Cause she really, she did go back to working
as a hairstylist and, but she is also this like
weirdly famous person.
And I don't think she knows how to do both.
Yeah.
It must be tough.
It must be confusing.
It's definitely confusing.
And I think that's what we're seeing reflected
in the content.
Yeah. But I think she's living her truth.
I would say she's living her truth too.
And if we don't see her in the next season of White Lotus,
like that's such a brilliant point.
She was a, she's a good actress.
Like she did a good job as Tracy.
Yeah, and she would be a good like character actress.
And I think we need to give her-
We just need her to play herself.
We need to give her another shot.
You think? Yeah, like I just think we're not done with Nikki Bl just need her to play herself. We need to give her another shot. You think?
Yeah, like I just think we're not done
with Nikki Blonsky yet.
She's having this moment.
And I know people say that about everyone.
They need to be a next season.
No, they don't shut up.
Agreed.
Nikki Blonsky does.
We are also going to be recapping the White Lotus
at the end of today's episode.
It was quite an episode.
Yeah, we'll be recapping the latest from Sodom and Gomorrah.
What a sick fucking show.
Yeah, no, and I think it gets worse
and I have a theory that I wanna share
and I came up with it all on my own.
Okay, yeah, we will be recapping that,
but I was seriously in shock when I was watching.
I was seriously sick.
No, and like the whole time I've had this huge pit
for Thomas Ravenel, like is there a worse feeling
than knowing when you're going to jail
and your family will be in financial ruin?
But I actually think that's not as bad as Saxton
waking up realizing like he had sex with his brother.
We'll save it for the teaming cap at the end of today's episode.
I think I'd rather go to jail.
I think I'd rather go to jail as well.
And you know that's my biggest fear.
Yeah.
Well, new fear unlocked.
Blacking out and having sex with your brother.
Well, Nikki Blonsky and the Disney, by the way,
do you think Nikki Blonsky is a Disney adult?
She kind of has the elk of a DA.
She does have the elk.
I don't know, it might be hard for her.
She probably at one point like went into the IP.
Oh, it's so true for her. She probably at one point went into VIP. And now she's in GA and that's tough.
That's why I also, I can never go VIP
because I'll never be able to go back.
It's so true.
It's kind of like flying first class.
Like once you do it once, everything else is terrible.
It's almost like a taste, it's too rich for her blood.
If you can stand it, the economy or GA, like stay.
That's actually, now I'm scared. I can stand it, the economy or GA, like stay.
That's actually, now I'm scared. Now I'm not gonna ever do VIP.
When they were doing the press tour for Hairspray,
they absolutely did a VIP trip to Disney.
It's just like,
Disney was definitely somehow involved in the project.
Oh, and of course, like that one clip
where Zac Efron went to rehab and they're like,
have you spoken to Zac?
She was like, I picked up the phone.
And it's like, okay, so did I.
I picked up the phone.
She's actually not real.
I'm sorry, like a character study
needs to be done on her brain.
She's so crazy, but like, and she doesn't even,
that's why she's so great.
She doesn't know she's being so entertaining
by being such a freak.
And then the hotel in West Virginia.
If you haven't seen the clip of Nicki Bonsky
at the hotel in West Virginia,
she's like being an influencer,
like she obviously got this room for free,
so she's tagging the room.
And it's like exactly what you would expect
from a classic influencer showing the room,
showing the room service throughout the trip,
but it's an actual roadside hotel.
And she's like, look at this view.
And you guys, she's being dead serious,
it's an actual parking lot.
It actually sounds like satire,
cause she's like, look at this view, like thank you, West serious. It's an actual parking lot. It actually sounds like satire. Cause she's like, look at this view.
Like, thank you, West Virginia.
And it's a parking lot.
West Virginia, you've been amazing.
It's satirical a hundred percent.
You would think it's like an SNL skit
about an influencer.
But it's not satirical from her.
It's earnest.
She's dead serious.
She got this obviously free hotel room.
You guys, and she's like, look at this room service.
And it like actually comes in a brown paper bag.
Like it's actually, she's so look at this room service and it like actually comes in a brown paper
You guys absolutely have to that's of all the videos
Also, it's not even like the content okay, so maybe you got your room service in a brand picket bag, but you take like a part G pick
and like, we don't know where to put it.
It's her take on it.
It's the aesthetics of her content.
And she has like Vaseline on her lens the whole time.
It's like so blurry.
100%.
It is performance art.
It is so funny.
And then the cameos are just so crazy.
Like she opens it up and it's like someone's like sister pass
and she's like, without love.
No, no, she opens up all the same.
Good morning Baltimore.
It's Nikki Blonsky from Hairspray.
Sorry about your sister.
She introduces herself like her name
is no longer Nikki Blonsky.
It's Nikki Blonsky from Hairspray.
She has to remind people.
Nikki Blonsky, nay turned lad.
Literally.
Oh my God, she, it's nice to see everybody
like picking up and noticing things you and I
have been noticing and talking about for years.
Not to be like so annoying.
I know, but like we've really been trying
to sound the alarm here.
We have, we're always talking about Nikki Blonsky.
We're also always talking about hairspray
and that would be a great time.
I hope hairspray streaming numbers are gone way up.
Yeah, people need to educate themselves and put some respect on her name.
She's so funny.
Oh my God.
I think I also need to watch that show huge.
I think so too, but like, what if you fall in love with it
and there's no more?
I know.
I don't think I will fall, based on some of the clips
that I saw, like, I don't think it's a show
that you fall in love with.
I don't know.
Nikki Blonsky, she's got that Blonsky charm.
And do you know that guy, Heart Throb Anderson?
Rob Anderson, Heart Throb?
Excuse me?
He does like, he's like a social media guy.
His username, his name is Rob Anderson,
but I think his username, his username is-
Heart Throb Anderson.
He like watches old movies and recaps them.
He's the one who made like that Julia Stiles-
I know him.
You know him.
So he did a recap of huge
and it actually made it look so fucking funny.
That's really funny.
So that's what I'll be doing this weekend.
Okey dokey.
Uh oh, did I copy Selena Gomez?
Oh my God, wait, I had somebody I wanted to say
about Selena Gomez.
Oh, do we have a story about her?
No, but we could.
I've got a slot.
No, no, no, I want to.
And I'm not afraid to fill it.
No, I just want to say,
because now that I feel like we talked about it
on the podcast, my phone heard me
and I've been getting served like Hailey versus Selena content
and like the lyrics from Selena's new album
being pulled out of context.
You're so embarrassing.
Yeah, right. So there's like a lot of things like that.
I just, I really want to remind people
and I'm not taking any of it like seriously at all.
She literally posted it herself.
Selena is one of those artists who I feel like
I don't study their lyrics because she's a collaborator.
She's not known for her songwriting.
Yeah, it's like who does Julia Michaels find embarrassing?
Correct, who does Phineas find embarrassing?
Because they tagged a long list of songwriters
and collaborators and partners.
And so people looking into it
as if it's from Selena's diary, we need to take a step back.
You could do that with Olivia Rodrigo.
You can do it with Taylor Swift.
You can do it with artists who you know really like-
Gracie, Gracie Face.
Gracie, who you know are really writing
from their own experience.
Sometimes they're the sole songwriter on an album.
Did you see that list of people, her and Benny tagged?
There's a million songwriters.
So people thinking this is like directly from her journal.
I think we need to take a step back.
That's like thinking Katy Perry, you know?
She's like, she's known for other things as a pop star,
not her songwriting.
Katy Perry's also a songwriter.
Is she?
Yeah, yeah.
That's like her- I don't know.
Oh, okay, fine.
That was a bad example, though.
But I understand what you're saying.
And also like say they, all these 30 people
like did pull from Selena's own- Dua Lipa.
Say all these 30 people did pull from Selena's own experience
and she's like telling them what she wants to sing about.
So it's like 30 people in a room,
like writing a diss track about Hailey Bieber
is really embarrassing.
So I wanna believe-
That's not what it is.
I wanna believe like the first one where it's just like
someone wrote her a song and she's singing it.
But the fact that it's Benny,
like didn't make me feel like it was more personal.
Because of the relationship with Justin?
No, because like they're billing it as their album.
So they're really singing someone else's thought,
like story and words.
Like, yes, that's sometimes it's weird to think about
with certain artists that like, it's like this deep
and they talk about the music like so personally
when they really had no hand in writing it.
Yeah.
That's just kind of a weird part of the industry.
And I feel like that's what's happening.
And this is not meant to be shade at all.
I think Selena as a pop star is known for like other things
when like, I wouldn't say her songwriting
is her leading attribute.
Yeah, I agree with that.
So keep that in mind when you're like dissecting,
we can be crazy investigators with Taylor Swift.
Like we know that was in her notebook
on the side of her nightstand.
Like we know that.
I don't think that's the case here.
Understood, good point.
So that was what I wanted to say.
Now are you ready for the fast five stories that you notdo need to know? And it's the Fast Five Stories that you.do need to know
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off your order. Thank you your clorder. You You're welcome. You're daughter. First story, the big news of the weekend. Jonas con
took over the American Dream Mall with Jonas Brother
concerts, events, food and more. Yeah. So Jonas. I took
over my weekend too. Yeah. I could tell you were affected
by it. I didn't talk about my weekend in the pre-show
at Fast Five Banner because I literally did not one thing.
I laid in bed the entire weekend.
I went to the diner.
I watched Friday Night Lights like I did nothing,
but I consumed so much JonasCon content.
So like, I do feel like I was there.
It's almost as if you were at Jonas,
you were mentally, you were at JonasCon.
Yeah, I was actually more so like analyzing JonasCon.
I find the whole thing very confusing
and I'm not coming at it as a hater,
but the whole thing felt so off brand to me
for the Jonas Brothers.
It feels like something you would do
just like a later stage in your career,
very like new kids on the block,
how they have like a cruise.
Yeah, so here's what happened.
Jonas Con, which was a celebration of all things Jonas.
20 years in the making, Camp Rock, they did it all.
Pizza Girl, Sheena Shay was there,
took over the American Dream Mall on March 23rd
with the Jonas Brothers, their brother Franklin,
we know him as Frankie.
All American-
I just wanna say, it's kind of a banner year
for Sheena Marie Shay, even though her show got canceled.
The Jonas Brothers want her, Lady Gaga wants her.
Don't worry about her.
Oh, and she got plucked out of very few people
from the old show to go to the new show.
Yeah, but she set herself up for success. This didn't like, this didn't just happen to her.
I just feel like she needs to get credit
for laying the bricks.
Yeah, but I think like the Ariana year,
like the most previous year was kind of a hard year.
The jokes were like, Sheena's like, you know.
Oh, and do you know that she was on Masked Singer?
I did know that.
That's what I'm saying.
She's having a great year.
Yeah.
So all Malerkin rejects and other acts playing multiple sets
and Jonas themed activities,
food and photo booths located throughout the mall.
They also did a Chicks in the Office podcast taping.
Jay Shetty was there.
Oh yeah.
Big time Rush performed, Big Rob, you know, from Burning Up.
They really like, they plucked, the Camp Rock cast was there.
Their entire lore, every joke,
they had the mall's best pizza stall
turned into Jonas pizza for the day,
Mrs. Field sold Jonas cookies,
and Yard House had Shake by the Ocean,
and Around the Clock all had Jonas themed menu items.
So as somebody who was virtually there,
you know, in a virtual sense,
I can tell you it looked like an event
that was really well done. I think a lot of times- Like not Fire Festival. A lot of there, in a virtual sense, I can tell you, it looked like an event that was really well done.
I think a lot of times-
Like not Fyre Festival.
A lot of times, ever since Fyre Festival,
you are worried that this big event being put on
by celebrities is gonna leave you in the middle
of the Bahamas with a cheese sandwich.
And it wasn't that, it was really well done.
I saw people complaining, like, my VIP ticket.
But for the most part-
Yeah, the view from GA is better than VIP.
Okay.
But that's life, that's life.
For the most part, like it looked like a safe event
and well-organized event.
And sometimes VIP isn't about the view.
I don't know if they build about,
but sometimes it's just about like the privacy.
No, and like just being away from like the mosh pit.
So it looked like it was really well-run.
It was organized, it was safe, it was really for the fans.
Like, and it was like the Jonas Brothers showed up
for three seconds, like they were there all day,
multiple, what music is playing? It's coming from, sorry, the fans. And it was like the Jonas Brothers showed up for three seconds. Like they were there all day, multiple.
What music is playing?
Sorry, the volume on my iPad was on from this weekend.
Oh man, I thought we were about to be pranked or something.
I thought you were having fireworks outside your studio.
Do you not hear that?
No, you had like a late reaction.
Because I was waiting for you.
I thought it was coming from you.
I'm like, is she dying?
That was really crazy. It a capital one commercial kind of a beautiful beat what nerve
So kudos to the Jonas Brothers for not like, you know alienating their fans in like a parking lot in New Jersey
Like it really was it was really well done. I like that. They like leaned into all of their lore
I just like can't get past I really feel like they got into like some sort of bad financial deal
because this is something like you do once
to make a ton of money.
Like the way people say, like Bruno Mars is in gambling,
do you have like, I feel like Kevin,
like somebody, not Kevin, it would never be Kevin.
But like somebody within the group, I don't know,
it just feels so incongruous with the level
that they're at as celebrities.
I just feel like did they even make that much money
from this?
A lot of people were there and they did two sessions.
Like they did it twice,
cause so many people want to take it.
It's like I saw a line through the parking lot,
like thousands of people.
More than you could play to at a stadium?
I don't know.
And they're playing MetLife Stadium they just announced.
So like, I don't know this.
I need someone to explain to me like what,
besides nourishing.
I just feel like for the Jonas Weathers,
there's easier ways to make money.
Yeah.
A big commercial deal.
It was a long day for them.
They weren't just doing.
I don't know what the strategy is here.
Like maybe they wanna enter that legacy phase
of like new kids on the block where we're like,
you know, a van for moms. Vegas residency.
And like, hey, we're always here for you.
And like, that's kind of a nice place to be.
It is, but it just doesn't feel like that's really
where they're at naturally.
They're releasing the music.
They do big collaborations with relevant people.
Like, but it does feel so random to me.
Maybe it's just a way.
Unless like the American Dream Mall paid them
millions of dollars to do this.
I was talking about it all weekend.
So when I brought it up to Ben, he like didn't care.
And he's like, maybe the mall,
cause it is like one of those billion dollar malls.
Maybe the mall paid them even more.
Okay. So say the mall paid them $20 million.
Divided by three after taxes.
I'm sorry, to make a couple million a day.
Okay. That's pretty a day. Okay.
That's pretty good actually.
Yeah.
I found the whole thing so confusing
and that's not to say it was a bad event.
It actually looked really pargy.
I agree.
And if I'm a big fan, like a die hard fan
and I get to go and they're playing into every joke,
every movie they made, they're not shying away, I love that.
But this is seriously just not something you do.
They're not at their peak.
I would say like when they came back,
they had like a year where they were really peaking.
But they're still like an extremely popular.
They have hit songs and cool collabs.
They release new music constantly.
They're very cool.
They announced all these projects.
Joe's releasing a solo album.
I'll like really never understand the solo.
Yeah, I know.
Stop.
Yeah, just-
Take your best songs,
put them on the group album and stop.
Agreed.
I mean, but imagine having to split stuff three ways.
Like that's tough.
No, I already like lament over having to split shit with you.
I know, but the thing for them that they need to know
is like you make five times more when you're doing it
as a job or a switch.
You split it three ways, the math, maths.
1000%.
And like it being in New Jersey, like a homecoming,
like I get the whole thing.
Yeah.
I just, I have questions.
Yeah.
So maybe someone who has insider track,
if you work on like the marketing team,
American dream, like just sound off.
If you work on like the Jonas Brothers
like business management team, like do they need the money?
I don't think they need,
I don't think they're in a desperate situation.
I think this might've been like a huge payday
and who would say no to that?
Or this is their way because they did cancel
like a big part of their tour for some reason, remember?
Yeah, but maybe this is a way of like giving back
to the fans.
Giving back to the European fans
by doing a Jonas coming to New Jersey, that's so sweet.
Jackie, I'm genuinely looking for answers here.
I understand.
Cause do you feel what I feel?
Like the strangeness of this?
Okay. Yeah.
And they're like, it's like at a water park
and they have their fans in bathing suits.
Like, I don't know, the whole thing just is confusing.
I heard there was a bathing suit component.
Yeah, cause you know the American dream mall,
like one of the big attractions.
Okay, so one of the big attractions there
is one they have an indoor, that's where I learned to ski. If you guys remember, I vlogged it for Patreon. It like one of the big attractions. Okay, so one of the big attractions there is one they have an indoor,
that's where I learned to ski.
If you guys remember, I vlogged it for Patreon.
It's one of these insane malls.
So they have an indoor ski mountain,
they have an indoor water park,
and they had like a concert at the water park
and everybody was like in their bathing suits.
Like, I don't know, it just feels,
it feels like something you do when you're over the hill
and you wanna still make money from your former glory days.
Now, obviously this was on a much bigger scale.
I don't think the new kids on the block cruise
is as well executed as this.
I don't know, I really don't know.
The more we learn, the more questions we have.
Correct.
Well, if you know anything, let us know.
Please.
And if you went, how was it?
I thought I heard overall,
it was like a very premium experience.
Yes.
Are you ready for our next story?
Mm-hmm.
As much as it pains me to say the good guys are making news.
The good guys are making news.
Their first episode.
Jackie said she opened up TMZ today to like,
it's the first story.
Pillage for stories.
It was the first story.
It's the first story.
I have to be honest.
I listened to the episode while I was getting ready first story. I think it's the first story. And I have to be honest, I listened to the episode
while I was getting ready this morning.
I thoroughly enjoyed myself.
It was so crazy how Drake and Josh were able
to just like snap back and be Drake and Josh again
and how their chemistry,
they remembered lines from the Amanda show.
Their dynamic is just so the same as it was.
It was a really great episode so far.
I don't even know if we talked about,
like once it was, oh, you did talk about
once it was announced.
I did briefly talk about it,
but I didn't wanna talk about it too much
before people could watch it.
Now you can watch it and listen to it.
It's available everywhere.
And it's actually really crazy,
I feel like to Josh and Ben's credit,
cause there is this like big heavy thing
they need to talk about, right?
Like everything we learned in the documentary last year,
like the show that brought everyone so much joy.
Drake was going through like one of the worst times
of his life and he was suffering abuse at the hands
of somebody who was supposed to protect him.
So it's hard to like navigate that conversation
while also being nostalgic and funny and light.
And I feel like the episode really, it's two parts.
So the second part comes out on Thursday,
but I feel like they really covered both kind of,
cause that's what people wanna tune in for,
like the fun Drake and Josh.
But we just learned all of this
from the documentary last year.
We also need to unpack that a little bit.
And they're very open too with one another
because they did have this public fight.
And people thought that they had major beef.
I don't think they had major beef,
but they just hadn't spoken.
Yeah, and I think it's just like the longer things go
without speaking, the more miscommunication there is,
the more inferences people make,
and it just drives you apart,
especially when like so much of your time together
was during your formative years,
and everybody was like struggling with major issues.
So it makes sense how they got to such a bad place.
But I was watching, listening to the episode,
and I really feel like, and I know we're so anti-reboot,
like I know that we are, and I really feel like, and I know we're so anti-reboot, like I know that we are.
And I feel this way.
But I feel like Drake and Josh deserve a movie buddy comedy
because I was also realizing I liked Drake and Josh passively
like you said on the show last week,
I don't remember you liking Drake.
Like I liked it when it was on, I watched it and I enjoyed it.
But for someone like Ben, it's his Hannah Montana.
Like it shaped him as a person.
And by the way, I've been reading comments all day
from like YouTube and-
Even Justin Bieber.
Yes, Ben is like a part of a big generation of men
whose Hannah Montana was Drake and Josh.
So for me, like you want to bring Hannah back.
I will, that's a good idea.
Anytime, any place of all interested parties
are on board in a real way.
And I feel like there is actually the potential here
to do like a movie.
We don't need a TV show,
like a movie like Drake and Josh Adventure,
and it's like really well written,
and they get to like have their buddy comedy moment
because Drake was saying that's what I always wanted,
like, you know, Johnny Carson and his guy,
and Lucien Desi.
Yeah, and like they found that in each other,
but they couldn't even enjoy it because they were just both being- and Desi. Ethel. Yeah, and like they found that in each other,
but they couldn't even enjoy it
because they were just both being.
Suffering.
So taken advantage of by the industry.
And I feel like they deserve like one time
to really enjoy it and do it right.
Because it comes out of their pores.
Like they get together and they're all ready
like bada bing, bada boom.
And so what Drake was saying,
cause you're right, and I completely agree,
is Drake lives in Mexico,
and they were asking him about that,
and he basically said,
Drake and Josh was on in Mexico
on the equivalent of like Fox 5 here, basic cable.
Every kid in Mexico,
he says he is the most famous person.
He has so many work opportunities in Mexico,
more so than he would ever have in America or LA.
And so when you think of the impact
just that even outside of the States,
like of the show, it's actually really crazy.
I never thought about it.
Like, did people in other countries watch Hannah Montana?
I think so.
Okay.
Yeah, it's just, everyone has like their show
from their time, but like Drake and Josh
is just as big as Hannah Montana.
And when you think about like that show,
it's a part of who I am, it's in my DNA.
And that's how Drake and Josh is for other people.
And I just feel like there's more here because it ended,
before it's time and while they couldn't even enjoy it,
and imagine the kind of continuity they could be making
if they like were on good terms.
And I just feel like with the right writers and producers
and like something high budget, like this would kill.
And the crazy thing is, is that it's a show titled
off of both of their real names,
because I'm sure they would never wanna work
with Nickelodeon or Paramount and they shouldn't,
like it was such a traumatic, terrible,
but technically like the intellectual property
of the show belongs to Paramount, but it's their real names.
So like you literally could just go,
like you don't need. Maybe it could be Josh and Drake, or maybe they'll work with Paramount., but it's their real names. So like you literally could just go, like you don't need.
Maybe it could be Josh and Drake,
or maybe they'll work with Paramount.
Like maybe it's all new people
and maybe they would do right by them.
I don't know.
I mean, it's a good way to undo some of like the PR damage
that that documentary did.
Yeah, I just feel like there's still this need for it.
And what was so funny was the story about Justin Bieber,
how Drake was like beefing with Beliebers on Twitter
and like just talking trash to them
and like inadvertently to Justin.
And then like Justin saw all of it
and then Scooter saw him at a club.
He was like, is that really you on Twitter?
He's like, you guys are seeing that?
He's like, yeah, man, like Justin,
he was like, Justin loves Drake and Josh.
Like he's so bummed out.
No, Justin is like literally the target demo.
He like, he was a Ben.
And imagine like Ben, like Drake is like
talking shit about you and your fans.
And the thing is now I think like,
hindsight of course is 2020.
Like I think there was a couple of years
where Drake was like having sort of like a public
image issue.
He was acting really strangely on social media
and in real life.
And now we know like why that was.
He was like truly spiraling in like a,
in a real way, not just online.
So I think all is forgiven probably from Justin Bieber.
Yeah, yeah, I would hope so.
Especially cause like the way he describes it,
like he didn't mean anything by it.
He didn't realize that like he would ever see it,
which I feel like in the early days of Twitter,
like, yeah, you don't realize you're just like
fucking around and that it's reaching so many people.
So it's been really good so far.
I think I have like 10 minutes left
and then part two comes out later this week.
So it's just been a treat.
Good on the good guys.
I did listen to their intro and everything
and their new song, which is really amazing.
And they played it twice
because then Drake wanted to hear it.
And like right at the beginning.
And the guy who worked on it with Josh
worked on Drake's albums.
And Drake was like,
do people say like your song sounds
just like my second album?
And I believe that the partner,
the guy who Josh worked on the,
Josh wrote the good guys theme song,
but then when it came time to have it produced and made,
yeah, I believe he also did the Drake and Josh theme song.
Right.
So-
Which is Drake, Bell's song.
Cause he's a singer.
Yes, yes.
And just like the fact that Ben is a part of all this
is not lost.
I mean, I saw Ben getting,
I saw Ben getting a lot of hate
for not being there in person.
And I just want to say to my husband's credit,
he literally had a flight and it was the week,
remember I was sick on that Friday and Ben filled in for me.
I was so sick. He was so sick.
Like, no, he's not leaving.
And by the way, as a podcast listener, which I am when I listen to stuff these days, like it really filled in for me. I was so sick. He was so sick. Like, no, he's not leaving. And by the way, as a podcast listener,
which I am when I listen to stuff these days,
like it really doesn't affect me.
The podcast listeners are so chill.
You know, it's the video community.
That have like a lot of high maintenance needs.
That are up your button around the corner.
Get rid of the frames, get rid of the frames.
No.
We love you guys, but the people listening as a podcast,
like they are so chill.
It's so true.
You know what? I should have asked for an advanced copy of this podcast
when because when Zack and I were driving back from Disney yesterday,
he like wanted to listen to a podcast, but like everything I was suggesting,
he was like, no.
So I was like, OK, so.
Oh, you really should have just asked.
I didn't even think of it.
He would have loved that.
He he would love that.
You would love it.
So good on the good guys.
Happy for them.
I guess. You feather in TNN's cap.
Like it is still about us.
It's true, they make us look good.
We invented them.
It's so true.
You know, like we literally copy everything they do now
these days, like with their theme song
and their little intro video.
They could have had a podcast without TNN,
they'd say, okay.
So true.
But no, we invented them, okay?
Yeah.
Don't forget it.
Our next story is a twofer
because the Paul brothers are making news.
Not only-
What's the other one doing?
I know Jake got engaged.
Jake got engaged and they have a reality show on Max
that's dropping this week.
It's called Paul American and they're all in it.
And it sounds amazing.
Oh, that's a cute name.
Yeah.
So they are now doing press for Paul American.
They talk to TMZ Sports, TMZ, TMZ Sports about the show.
They're peeling back the curtain of their family
in a new reality TV show.
And they're telling viewers that people will see them
in a way that they've never shown the world until now.
Well, I saw that the younger one got engaged.
I actually recently started following his fiance
on social media because I was really surprised to find out
she's not like what you would think Jake Paul's.
She's an Olympian.
Deeply accomplished speed skater, right?
Jaddo Weerdum.
She's international, she's far enough.
I don't know where she's, I think she skis
for like the Netherlands or something.
But he like flies around the world
and like comes to her competitions.
It's actually, it's just like not what you would have
expected from Jake Paul. And and like comes to her competitions. It's actually, it's just like not what you would have expected from Jake Paul.
And I actually really like her content.
I followed her the other day cause I saw this like video
she posted on a PJ.
And then they find out that this weekend they got engaged.
Like not to make everything about me,
but the timing was kind of weird.
No, I know.
But maybe like they were getting high engagement.
So they were like served two more
because they were obviously so happy in their relationship.
You know, I love the Paul brothers
and I'm going to be watching this show
because everything I've watched of theirs,
like the one thing.
Jake Paul-
They're not what you think.
What was that series called?
Impulsive.
Oh no, that's their podcast.
Untold.
Untold Jake Paul, yes.
Was so good.
They're not what you think.
And now they're like living very traditional lives.
Like Logan just had a baby with Nina Agdal.
You all know her.
That's what's shocking is,
and so you would think like Jake Paul got engaged,
but no Logan like really settled down a little while ago.
And it's like, they're oddly traditional.
Yeah. And they work really hard
and they're having a lot of success.
And I think it will be like a great show
cause there's just huge personalities
and their worlds are very interesting. So. Well, I'm curious to be like a great show because there's just huge personalities and their worlds are very interesting.
So.
Well, I'm curious to see like their lifestyle,
like at home, because they know they live in Puerto Rico.
That's like a business decision they made
to avoid paying taxes.
And let me just say, I respect it heavily.
I'm definitely some, something I'd be interested
in doing one day.
And they lead these like very extravagant lives.
I know people like locals, like hate them,
like taking advantage of like the tax system.
But that's something I definitely find interesting.
Yeah. And I also, the Paul brothers always remind me
of Tommy Ferry because that's how I was introduced to him.
And I also need to mention like Tommy Bambi and Molly
were all on vacation in Dubai this weekend.
They actually extended their trip.
They didn't post together, but like they are,
they didn't like, they all posted.
Did you see the paparazzi pictures
of them landing at the airport?
No, I didn't.
Was it like they- Okay, something really
bothered me about it.
Wait, hold on. Okay, let me tell you.
Yeah, pull it up. Okay.
And tell me if you'll notice.
Maui-May airport?
Is that a good search?
Yeah, yeah.
It's her, Bambi and him, like leaving the airport
with the stroller and the suitcases and stuff.
Okay, they were- The classic paparazzi pic.
Let me know what is wrong with this image.
Okay, there's a lot of images.
So I'm just looking.
Yeah, you'll see it in all of them.
I'll see it in all of them
that she's pushing a stroller and a luggage
and he's only pushing one luggage and he has a free hand.
Correct, they have two big luggages,
two checked luggages and a stroller.
She has one stroller, one luggage, he has one luggage.
What the fuck are you doing, bitch?
Take both suitcases.
Oh, and there's like a security guard not helping at all.
Why is this woman-
No, the security guard is pulling one.
And then in this picture, Tommy's pulling three
and Molly's pulling one.
I'm sorry. Unacceptable.
Why do they have so much luggage?
Unacceptable.
When you're pushing the stroller, like that's it,
especially when you have a husband
and like professional security. No, when you have a husband and like
professional security.
Not just a husband, but a husband whose job it is
who's a wrestler.
To pull weights.
And with these sorts of luggages that where the wheels
are 360, you can put the handles like this
and then just push them at once.
It's very easy.
I was very upset.
And when I opened the comments,
I saw other people being like,
why is she carrying a suitcase?
And I was so glad I wasn't the only person having this
thought because it would bother me so much.
Yeah, it's hard.
You could see she's struggling,
but I'm gonna focus on the positive,
which is that they're clearly back together.
I am so happy for them.
I'm happy for her because I know that's what she wants.
I'm happy for Bambi because this is what's best for Bambi.
And Tommy like keeps alluding to the fact
that he's like healthier than ever and happier than ever.
And I think he's-
And he said he didn't cheat.
He didn't cheat, but he was a bad partner.
Okay, so that's something you can work on.
Because he was abusing alcohol and out all night
and you can't hear from him and just not being,
but like obviously not bad enough for her to stop loving him
and wanting to be with him.
So I'm glad that they can now be
in the best relationship possible.
Complete agreement.
And Amazon better have been there with them cameras.
I want the rekindling recorded, televised.
And Tommy looks good.
He looks well.
Strong.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Not strong enough to carry through suitcases.
But of course.
Yeah.
So Mazel Tov to them.
Congrats.
Are you ready for our next story?
Four?
Number four, yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Amy Schumer shares that she's back on weight loss drugs
after having a horrible experience with Wigovie.
Can I tell you that video she posted made me chuckle hard.
No same.
She was just posting, it was just like a random video
and she was sharing it because the company that prescribed her the medication is a company
she's invested in.
So it was obviously like, she was sharing a lot
from this video and she wasn't intending to be so funny.
She made me laugh.
Well, she's just a funny lady, but yeah,
she had like a couple of things that she wanted to say.
She obviously like wanted to post a video
to talk about her positive experience with this company
that was so positive that now she's invested in it.
So it behooves her to talk positively about it
to her millions of followers.
Why she decided to do that while she's driving in the car.
I mean, she could have been sad in front of her ring light.
And she does have the craziest social media.
Let me tell you, it is so poorly managed
and not a shade at all.
Like it's clearly run by her.
So she'll like take a screenshot of something
and it's like, there's a picture of her on the side.
It's just not like a pargy influencer.
So it's very on brand for her to like make this chaotic video,
but I actually thought she was gonna crash.
No, I know.
And people love that about her.
And I think it's really great.
And I actually wasn't worried about the driving aspect
because it's not like she was looking at the phone
and she's probably a good driver
and she can drive and talk at the same time, you know?
It was just like, why are you gonna do this big endorsement
for your new investment?
Like as a half ass remark while you're in traffic?
I don't know.
I have no idea.
But what she said was years ago,
and she said this before, she went on Wigoby,
she was horribly nauseous because she has that thing,
that Kate Middleton thing of horrible nausea
during pregnancy and apparently transferred
to like when she was on these drugs.
And she was so sick she couldn't stay on it,
which I think she was bummed about.
And I think the anti-ozempic movement,
they love to reference, but even Amy Schumer,
like she's been open about the fact that it ruined her life.
Like I think they cite that often as like a reason
why people shouldn't take it,
even though she's clearly the exception.
What's the name of that thing?
The Kate Middleton nausea.
Oh, I don't know, I don't know, I don't know.
Because literally like three people have it,
the two of them are them.
And so you like can't use them as-
Examples.
Examples, high premises gravidarum.
Yeah, HG is what they call it.
Right, so she has talked about how one time
she used the drugs, it did not work for her,
and then she never used it again.
So that's kind of the end of that story.
Until she shared, she's actually been on Manjaro recently,
she got like a new prescription.
I know the drugs, everybody's like, they're all the same.
They're actually really different,
and you can have a terrible experience on one
and an amazing experience on the other.
And she's having a really like pleasant experience
on Manjaro, I think it's doing what it's supposed to be doing
without making her terribly sick.
And so she wanted to share that,
which I love when people share positive ozempic experiences
because it never gets shared.
So I love that for her and I'm excited for her.
All thanks to Midi Health,
which also diagnosed her as perimenopausal.
Interesting.
She's being so funny.
Like, I'm sorry.
And she was saying like that,
she basically was saying that these drugs
can be really expensive unless you're diabetic
or medically obese, which the internet does think that I am.
Like she was being really funny,
while also talking like very relatedly
about something very real.
And to me, this is like the number one way
to get into my heart.
Like-
Well, also like making a bit of money.
Correct, invest.
We love to see a woman in business.
Yeah, but someone like Amy Schumer at this point
like can't go on Wigovia Majaro Zempik
and like not tell us at this point,
just because we're all very invested
and like she keeps it so real.
Yeah.
And of course she feels the same.
She's like, of course, I would tell you.
I do think there was a time where talking about
your being on one of these drugs was extremely brave.
Yeah.
I think now it's kind of been detonated.
Is that the right word?
Like when you-
Diffused?
Yeah, kind of.
It's not so much of like a triggering hot topic anymore.
But people still are lying.
Oh yeah, people are still lying about it.
I saw someone, like someone's like getting called out.
Like you're totally on it.
And it's like, yeah, she probably is.
I'm gonna text you.
Oh, I know who.
Yeah.
Do we talk about this person already on the show briefly?
No. Oh. I'll just text you. Do we talk about this person already on the show briefly? No.
Oh.
I'll just text you, but why text me who you think.
And I'm just like, I'm sure you guys can figure it out,
but it's just like, she's decided on us to say,
but of course she's on it.
I feel like any celebrity who's like always been overweight
and is now not, like they're probably on it.
Except, except, and I want to talk about,
cause I've been seeing a lot of people talking about this.
Oh.
Lizzo.
Lizzo, you don't think she's on it?
I actually now, I don't.
I think so much time has passed
that she's started her weight loss journey
that if you were on the drug for that long,
you really would have lost like probably
more significant weight.
It's been like, when did she get canceled?
Was that two years ago?
No, maybe a year.
When was it?
Let's search Lizzo Banana.
That'll do it. Lizzo Banana controversy.
The lawsuit, they're not giving me time Gemini.
Here, NBC News.
This is from August 1st, 2023. So it's a year and a half
Okay, I think that
If you were consistently using one of these drugs while also changing your lifestyle, which you can see on social media
She works out a lot. She's eating very differently. I
Think she would look much different. I think it's happening like very slowly for her. She looks amazing
I and you know, I was very critical of her when she dressed up as it for I do not think she's happening like very slowly for her. She looks amazing. I, and then, you know, I was very critical of her
when she dressed up as it for,
I do not think she's on it now.
I really don't.
And like, why not?
I don't know.
Some people like have like, I think moral issues with it.
So that's, so I think some people-
Yeah, I guess some people are like anti unnecessary drug use.
Right, it is like an injection.
So it's not like an Advil that you pop.
Yeah, so if you're like a natural swirling.
It doesn't work and it makes them sick.
Right, right, right.
People have their reasons.
I'm not against anybody who doesn't wanna be on it.
I could never be me.
You can't relate.
Can't relate.
I'm so excited to get back on it.
And guys, like God, you know,
when I bounce back like skinnier than ever, like don't start rumors about me. I'm on it, okay? on it. And guys, like God, you know, when I bounce back,
like skinnier than ever, like don't start rumors about me.
I'm on it, okay?
You don't even need to ask.
I'm not gonna do a big Patreon reveal.
I'm on it.
I can't wait to see how it feels one day.
It's gonna be like that Lisa Frank meme.
You have to tell me, like when the day comes,
I will fly down.
I wanna be on site for the first injection.
Watch, I'm gonna get nauseous.
Yeah, you have hyperpigmentlasia.
I don't have HG, but I am nauseous swirly.
Watch.
What was the story here?
Amy Schumer.
Oh, Amy Schumer.
We didn't go very far.
No, we didn't.
Like we're still on track.
We're just talking about a Zempig, which we always are.
Are you ready for our fifth and final story?
If it's our fifth and final story,
that's brought to you by booking.com, booking.yep.
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Yeah.
Today's episode is also sponsored
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Thank you Turd Shurence.
You're welcome Jerk Shurence.
Our video final story is some new couple news that is taking multiple worlds by storm.
Okay.
Tiger Worth's confirms that he is in a relationship with Vanessa Trump, who is the ex-wife
of Donald Trump Jr.
I thought it was gonna be Jennifer Aniston out with-
Pedro Pascal, yeah.
Yeah, I'll tell you.
They had like a three hour dinner.
Yeah, I saw that.
I'm texting you.
What?
She's texting me drama?
Got it, okay.
I thought that this whole time, I thought he was gay.
Tiger Woods.
No, he loves the ladies.
Isn't that his whole thing?
He can't stop like driving-
Not Tiger Woods.
Oh, Pedro Pascal.
Pedro.
So I was just like shocked to see Jennifer Aniston.
And good to know she's not dating Barack Obama.
That conspiracy theory, I guess, is debunked.
I don't think so.
Just cause you go to dinner with someone for three hours,
they might be like working on a new movie.
It doesn't mean that he's not gay.
It's not like they're like seeing.
Maybe he's friends with Barack.
Yeah, maybe like Barack went out the back door
and it was like a double date.
Right, Barack went out the back door for sure.
Yeah, they had dinner for three hours.
Could mean so many things.
Yeah.
So I wouldn't say like new couple news,
but just, I guess-
No, no, that's just where my mind went
because I saw a picture this morning.
But yes, not only are these two dating,
which I think came out a few days ago,
the real news is the incredibly bizarre Instagram post
and caption that Tiger Woods shared,
announcing his new relationship
whilst also asking for privacy.
Yeah, so, but a few days before that,
like it was like came out in the press
that they were dating,
but not confirmed by either one of them.
So then he confirmed it.
He said, love is in the air
and life is better with you by my side.
We look forward to our journey together
through life together.
At this time, we would appreciate privacy
to all those close to our hearts.
Okay, so why did you announce it?
I think like to confirm it
and people were talking about it.
So it's like, yes, we're together.
Please give us privacy.
I just feel like they're too famous
to have to even acknowledge a rumor.
Like he, in their own universe is like,
he is the most famous athlete of all time.
Like I would say he's up there with like Michael Jordan,
right?
Michael Jordan's not out here confirming rumors.
Like, I don't know, it's just kind of like low brow behavior.
Yeah, I agree.
But this is like huge for the golf world.
Of course, like Tiger Woods is Tiger Woods.
Well, it makes sense.
I could see how they would have met.
Like this doesn't feel so random.
And then her oldest daughter,
Kai is like a professional golfer.
So imagine then like your stepdad is Tiger Woods.
Oh wait, that's kind of crazy.
You know what I was also thinking
not to bring back to Drake and Josh?
That was the original blended.
Drake and Josh walked so Drew and Adam could run.
And so now Vanessa and Tiger can sprint.
Correct, right to the altar.
I actually, what I like about this story a lot
is that like she has five kids.
And I feel like sometimes, you know,
the woman you write them off,
like Don Jr has had a long-term girlfriend since.
He's in another relationship.
And you just think like the woman and the mom
like it's left behind, it's like, oh hell no.
She's with Tiger Woods, like mic drop.
I had the same thought.
I like this for her because I feel like, you know,
he's a bit of a philanderer, her ex-husband.
He's always, you know, out and about different women.
And she's just kind of like, you know,
the lowly ex-wife at home.
And she definitely is stunting on these hoes
with her new man who's like, so rich, so famous,
so talented, and you just know that daughter who golfs
is like gonna wanna be spending all the time
at mom's house now.
Yeah, and I think Don Jr. probably golfs.
This is probably like his hero.
1000%.
I just think it's great for women.
I actually agree with you.
It reminds me of Giselle, like having a baby now after Tom.
Kind of, yes, yes.
In a totally different way.
It was a win for women.
In the bucket of just like female empowerment.
Like things women can do
when you thought you left them behind.
And just kind of turning that stereotype on its head
of like the OG wife getting left behind for the younger woman.
Right, right.
Yeah, no, it's a good way of looking at it.
Yeah, so Mazel tov to the happy couple.
Truly, and we will respect your privacy, of course,
just like you asked.
Just after this story.
Now,
Correct. Privacy starts
now. Consider it private.
Yep. Our lips.
Lock the, throw away,
to lock them up and throw away the key.
Are you ready for White Lotus recap?
As much as one can be ready
to talk about something so disgusting,
let me tell you,
I thought that initial incest scene was like the end of it.
Right. And did I miss something
or they set us up that way?
No, they set it up that way.
Cause we're just seeing it from two people's POV.
So I think, and that's what made it so much more shocking.
The first incest scene is how Saxon Patrick Schwarzenegger
remembers it.
And it actually turns out that the brother, so the,
wait, the Saxon is the younger brother.
Sorry. What's the, Lachlan, L Lynn lock? No, Lachlan is the older
No, Claudia. Yes. You're wrong. No, you're so wrong. Don't waste your time. Lachlan is the brother
You're 100% Lachlan white lotus. Oh
Yeah, okay wait, maybe I'm wrong
Lock I just want to get this right. Oh, you're right. Okay, so Lachlan is a younger one. Wow
I need to rejigger my brain.
I've been calling the younger one Saxon the whole time.
So the first incest scene is the POV of Patrick Schwarzenegger.
He thinks that his brother was having sex next to him.
And he was jerking himself out.
And he started jerking off because there's like porn
happening next to him.
And he feels sick with himself for even doing that.
You know, like that's his brother.
When I saw that I was like, oh my God, that is sickening.
That is so twisted. By the way, it's inexcusable. But obviously. You know, like that's his brother. When I saw that I was like, oh my God, that is sickening. That is so twisted.
By the way, it's inexcusable,
but obviously the second one, like what actually happens,
makes it seem like not so bad.
Because as it turns out, that's actually not what happened.
He didn't just jerk off.
He was jerked off in his sleep.
He's just, Patrick Schwarzenegger is just sleeping there.
Really?
That's how I perceived it, me and Ben.
While his brother's getting fucked
and then he wakes up and there's like a masturbation
occurring, I think he thinks that like it's himself.
He's on drugs too.
Oh, I didn't get a sense that he was sleeping.
I got a sense that they were all on drugs,
like they're all caught up there having a threesome.
He's also, Saxon is also hooking up with the girl,
but at the time that the girl is hooking up with Lachlan,
Lachlan is jerking off his brother.
So I perceived it that the older brother had sex
with the girl and went to sleep,
and the girl had sex with the younger brother,
and then the younger brother also got the older brother
involved while he was sleeping post-coitus.
I seriously feel so nauseated.
I know.
And it's like the way Saxon is feeling
and reacting the next day, especially as he discovers
like more and more bad things.
It's like, it's so real.
Like how do you wipe this from your mind?
I don't even know.
I seriously have the biggest pit for him
and worse than for Thomas Robinel.
Of course, of course.
He's facing ruin and destitution.
Lachlan, this little pervert,
is so unaffected by it and-
Well, he doesn't remember it.
And my thought was that he was lying
about not remembering it
because he's just like a true fucking freak.
But it turns out he doesn't remember it.
And then when he does meditate at that place
and remember it, he is, he's not as horrified
as he should be, but he's shocked.
I think he's shocked and he's probably like,
I don't know, he was looking at the Tushy
in the first episode.
Things I did that, yeah.
So now it's like-
He also was the one to lean in and kiss the brother first
and make the kiss go longer.
But he's also drunken on drugs.
It's quite brilliant because we like hated
the older brother the entire time
and very slowly they started to show us,
like actually the freak here is the younger brother.
He was staring at the tushy, he made the kiss go longer,
he started jerking off his brother like he's a freak and now he's spending the night He was staring at the tissue. He made the kiss go longer. He started jerking off his brother, like he's a freak.
And now he's spending the night with Piper at that place.
So I just don't even want to know.
I feel like he's going to fuck Piper.
Oh my God.
And my theory is that Piper finds the gun
and Piper kills her whole family
because everyone is more sick than the next.
You know, she hates her older brother.
Then the one brother she liked is going to try and I think like, like have sex with her. That's what I think. Then he's going to find sick than the next. You know, she hates her older brother. Then the one brother she liked is gonna try and,
I think, like, have sex with her.
That's what I think.
Then he's gonna find out about the dad.
And then maybe he spares the mom
because she is kind of innocent and all this,
but she created these monsters.
Like, I think, because the family is so twisted.
Like, I think it has to be them who start killing people.
I don't think Piper is a killer.
Well, but then I think I could see that being
like the white lotus flip.
It's like, look, she was trying to reach serenity,
but the evil rich family got to her first.
Yeah, and when she was talking to the monk,
like it's clear that she was having existential issues
when she came here.
But I don't think enough to kill,
I don't think, like she hates her older brother.
She's not gonna kill him.
That's why she's running off to Thailand
to get away from all of us.
I could see it being the mother more,
finding out about everything.
She kills the husband, she kills herself.
She's so funny.
Yeah, she really is.
You can't live in China.
She's seriously funny.
She said, at this point in my life,
I don't think I could live an uncomfortable life.
Facts.
I actually can't with this family anymore.
Like they make me sick.
They make me sick with a pit.
Like the dread I feel for them.
And it's like, they can never go back home.
No, so I hate that family.
I hate the Bangkok storyline.
Like I find it's, I don't give a fuck.
We all are with you on that. So really the only joy I can feel is those three girls.
And they actually are, it's really written quite perfectly.
It's very, I think, not that I have friends like this,
but you know, like there are female friendships
that are just like this.
And Carrie Coon having a fucking breakdown
on last night's episode, like I'm not mad.
I'm not mad. I'm not mad.
She's so crazy.
And like, she's not wrong, right?
Her friend did push Valentine on her
and then slept with Valentine
and you're in a relationship and why were you pushing him?
So she's so valid, but like, I'm with Leslie Bibb.
Like we're on a trip, like must you ruin it?
And then get so crazy and drunk.
Like I actually, in the context of the argument,
she's right, like Michelle Monahan's a bitch.
But in the context of the trip, like I'm with Leslie Bibb,
like can we just chill?
And not her throwing Leslie Bibb under the bus.
Yeah, no, I agree.
Like Michelle Monahan is wrong.
And clearly that's something that she's done
throughout her life.
And then they're reunited after so many years.
And all the stuff of like high school goes,
you forget, like you, it doesn't matter, it washes away.
But then to like do the same thing that you've always done.
It just like, it brings up old issues
and then you're just as mad
and it's years worth of anger coming out.
But the fact that she can't compartmentalize
and just enjoy the trip and like,
just know like this is her friend
and her friend is like this and she's a man eater
and she's a bitch and she's gonna take what you have
and what she's telling you to take.
Just know that about people.
No, and it's like you're now 40
and you've been friends since high school.
And it's like either accept people for who they are
or don't be friends with them anymore.
That's valid too.
Yeah, and that is like supposing to feel bad
for Michelle Monahan when she's like,
everyone talks about me.
I didn't expect her to be the closest to me.
It's like, if these are the people closest to you,
you've got a problem.
You're screwed.
No, I don't feel bad for any of them.
The only one who I feel like a kinship to is Leslie Bibb.
And I really started to like her last week
when they were all partying and she's like, to what end?
Like we're married old ladies, can we go home?
And they wouldn't leave the villa
and like they were making her take the shot.
So it's like, she's down to fun
and have clown around and have fun,
but like these two are taking it so far in different ways.
And I actually felt like in this episode
it was the first time any one of them
wasn't like saying something to one friend
and a different thing to another.
Like what she was saying to Carrie,
whatever her character's name is,
is the same thing that she was like,
the same energy she was sharing with Michelle.
She wasn't like talking shit with Carrie
and then being like, oh yeah, she's crazy.
No, now everything is officially out in the open,
which it has not been at all.
Yeah.
Belinda and Porn Chai getting it on and then her husband,
I mean her son coming like seriously cringe.
I don't know like to what end,
like how that plays into any of this,
like objection relevance.
Yeah.
And when Guy talks-
Belinda needs to become a bit more stealth.
Like the fact that she doesn't say to the manager,
what's his name?
I don't know his name.
That she's like, oh, you know what?
I was mistaken.
Like she clearly sees this person is like,
not gonna have like take her side.
And people think that he's gonna run and tell Greg anyway.
So it's like, she should have just downplayed it.
When she saw Greg,
she should have acted like everything was normal.
And also been like, you know what?
I was totally mixed up.
Like I actually remember, like, you know what I mean?
She's not a good actress. She's not a good actress.
She's not a good actress, like in life.
She's just not like.
Oh, I don't mean the actress herself.
I mean like the character.
She needs to be acting more.
She's showing all her cards.
Yeah, she's so volatile.
She's gonna get herself killed.
A thousand percent, 100%.
Like Bangkok, whatever.
There's someone, I read a theory that, there's someone,
I read a theory that,
cause you know, Rick sees her husband
and then the episode ends and it's like,
her husband is his father.
Yeah, I think so, something like that.
But like, how can you really,
I don't care.
Is it gonna be him with a gray wig?
How can it be so clear?
No, I literally don't give a fuck.
Unless they're able to tie it to the whole thing somehow.
Right, yeah.
At some point all these storylines get closer together.
I don't have a theory as to how any of these random things
are connected.
And there's the dinner party next week at the house.
The dinner party at Craig's house.
And it's like why would Saxton go?
Saxton should pack his bags and leave.
He should never see those two girls again
because they're a constant reminder of this horror.
The fact that he wakes up the next day
and goes to the pool to hang out with them, like, no.
Nuts!
You hide your head in shame and you never,
like you don't go and like then recap.
Yep, when Guy Toc got his gun back,
like I actually was so relieved.
Like he gives me, he is also like a walking pit.
He act, because he's stupid.
Stupid as fuck.
Like if he's in charge of the safety of this facility,
it's no wonder there's gonna be another shooting.
Yeah.
And the girl, Chelsea, Rick's girlfriend,
I actually really like her.
She's like a good, she didn't like contribute much.
She didn't, it's not a part of the threesome or anything,
but she's like a good supplemental character.
Like when her reaction, when she's a good supplemental character.
Her reaction when she's hearing about
your brother jerked you off, so funny.
She's a great actress.
As much as there can be a moral compass on the show,
I think that she is that.
Supposed to be some sort of.
Yeah, I like when the two girlies are together.
And I feel bad for the other girlie
that she's in the dog house, but she acted crazy. Yeah, I don't feel bad for her. She's nuts, you know, she's in the dog house, but she acted crazy.
Yeah, I don't feel bad for her.
She's nuts.
I know, but I like her.
I can't like her.
She was participated in the incest.
I know. I can't like her.
I know, she's funny.
And I know, and it's a good strategy.
I know that like these types of shows
are always like one-upping each other
with like shock factor, right? Cause what's everyone talking about today? The incest and incest is a
really crazy line to cross. I'm not going to lie. And, and I found myself watching it and like,
not to be like judgmental, but I was like, this is fucking gross. I kind of hate that like this is
because there are so many TV shows now, everyone's always trying to like outdo one another with like
the crazy and it's always like sex related. And I don't know, did we really have to go there?
Not to pose a psychological, sociological question
on the community today, but did we really have to go there?
No, I don't feel that we did.
And I feel like if you had Nikki Blonsky on your show,
you wouldn't have to sink to such depths
because she could carry it.
Right, because if you have to have an incestual storyline
in order for, and in a modern day setting, right?
Because we keep comparing it to Game of Thrones,
whereas like incest was perceived differently.
In a, if you have to like have an actual sex scene
of incest, like to get people talking,
maybe we need to try new writers, you know?
And I also have to say last night's episode
was actually very good.
Like me and Ben were talking about it a lot.
Like we have a lot to, it wasn't a bad episode,
but it's like, at what cost?
Seriously, I feel sick.
No, it's thought provoking
because they're like throwing the craziest shit again.
But if that's what you have to do,
it's like, there's not another way.
And let me tell you,
Ben had a totally different takeaway from the episode.
He loved hearing from the Buddhist leader, the monk.
Excuse me, thank you.
I can't think of the word.
Oh, actually I liked it too.
I didn't like it, but I appreciated it.
No, he said that's so wise.
You know, Ben is obsessed with like Asian cultures
and spirituality central.
And I went, we went to bed afterwards
and like, I literally flipped over.
It must've been like an hour into my sleep
and he's on his phone.
I'm like, what are you doing?
He's like, I'm just reading about
all the monotheistic religions.
He's like, and then I was like, what are you reading?
And he's like, I'm on Kabbalah now. Uhistic religions. He's like, and then I was like, what are you reading about? He's like, I'm on Kabbalah now.
Uh-oh.
He's seriously so scary.
Yeah, he is.
Reading about Kabbalah.
He's Piper.
He is Piper.
And you are?
Victoria.
Herkupozi.
Yeah, that's Victoria.
You could have given me all day to guess her name.
Never would have come up with Victoria. I only knew it because I remember when she went up to the monks.
I'm Victoria Ratliff.
Got it.
Never would have guessed the ratliff's also their name.
That's our show. That's White Lotus.
That's the Fast Five.
That's the good guys, unfortunately.
And that's my favorite Disney adult doing her thing.
And that's my favorite Disney adult doing her thing.
And that's my favorite turdney adult.
I am a turdney adult.
You should open up a park called Turdney.
Yeah, it'd be really popular.
Thank you guys so much for listening
to the Toast of Monday Morning Show.
We're still in the Fast Five Story series
from Monday to Friday on YouTube.
So if you're watching us on YouTube,
please feel free to subscribe and give this video a thumbs up.
We are, excuse me, also available as podcasting.
We're podcasting, we found that Spotify.
Oh, in case anyone wants to know
what's happening to me this week
with my pregnancy symptoms
is I have developed carpal tunnel.
And apparently that's extremely common.
It's from swelling.
So are you going to take a break from your devices?
It doesn't even like, it just happens
not even with my devices.
But it will be worse if you're on your phone a lot,
actually, like that's how you can make it worse.
It's both hands.
That's how you can make it worse.
Do you wanna get better or do you wanna get worse?
Well, if I'm not on my phone, I'll just be worse in general.
So it's like, it all shakes out, it all comes down the wash.
I don't know, physical pain or mental pain.
Leave a five star review about our beautiful setting
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Was that the end of it?
I was like in the middle.
I know we went a little sideways, but we do love ya.
And we are saying bye.
Love ya bye.