The Toast - Toast Herstory: The Royal Toast (Original Airdate Friday, October 30th, 2020)

Episode Date: July 17, 2025

Watch the original episode here on Youtube. The Morning Toast with Prince William, Prince Harry and Queen Elizabeth William and Harry's royal rift was sealed by fate - and Diana, says author (Page Six)(11:20), Prince Charles Felt Dad Prince Philip 'Pushed' Him Into Marrying Princess Diana, Royal Biographer Says (US Weekly)(13:55)'Jost Married!' Scarlett Johansson and Colin Jost Tie the Knot in Intimate Ceremony (PEOPLE)(15:50)Jonas Brothers read for the holidays with new song 'I Need You Christmas' (NY Post)(19:23)Kanye West gave Kim Kardashian a hologram of her dad for her birthday (Page Six)(23:03)Grimes Reveals Her 5-Month-Old Son with Elon Musk Is 'Into Radical Art': 'He Just Actually Is' (PEOPLE)(26:15)Keeping Up With The Kardashians RecapSouthern Charm RecapThe Toast with Jackie (@JackieOshry) and Claudia Oshry (@girlwithnojob) Lean InThe Camper and The Counselor by Jackie OshryMerchThe Toast PatreonGirl With No Job by Claudia OshrySee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Good morning millennials! Good morning brother! Good morning brother! Good morning grandmother! Good morning my grandsons. Grandmother! You are looking ravishing this morning grandmother. Thank you, you as well.

You look so beautiful grandmother, we are so happy to see you. Thank you for having me. The most beautiful... I can't keep the accent in so well. You are the most radiant woman in all of Great Britain. Thank you. So radiant, grandmother. That's what you tell me.

Yes. We love you so much, grandmother. You, brother, are another story. Oh, I'm another story. Broke the family apart, disrespected the crown, and I'm the problem. Grandmother, can you believe this?

What bullocks. Absolute bullocks. Bloody hell, Grandmother. Bloody hell, you know that's not what happened. That's exactly what happened, my Harry. Grandmother, whose side are you on? Harry. William, but I still love you. Harry, why don't you go back to Canada,

or whatever it is your- Los Angeles. Yeah, gallivanting around the country while your duties wait for you at home. Don't you miss your duties? No, I have enough duties on my own. Well, just know all of us back home are picking up the slack where you and your wife left us. I'm sorry, brother.

I'm sorry, but I couldn't do it anymore. Yeah. I couldn't do it anymore, y'all. Do you know how much, do you know how much I would give to be you? No responsibility, no care in the world. You know how much I would give to be you? To be the Anne, not the spare?

Oh, what I would give to be the spare? Let's switch, the prince switch. Good morning, everyone, in case you haven't noticed, the Windsor family is coming to you live and in living color from the Toast Studios. Happy Halloween everyone. Woohoo! Happy Halloween, happy Toast-o-ween,

grandmother we love you, we got the snitch in studio. Give it up for grandmother! Woohoo! Woo woo woo woo woo woo woo woo woo woo! Grandmother snitch, how do you do? You are being fucking crazy. You know when you put on a costume and it kind of gets to you?

Harry's getting to you. I didn't know what kind of Harry I was gonna be, but I just feel like this party boy Harry energy where I'm just like, grandmother let's fuck this shit up, come on. Grandmother let's hit the clubs, mom. Ha ha ha ha. Oh my God, you're definitely channeling like early 2000s Harry.

No, this is not Meghan Markle Harry. This is not like new fatherhood Harry. No, no, no, no, no, no. It's really like... We have Archie right there. You're really like the rebel Harry face. Rebel without a cause. Well, we hope you guys enjoy our costumes. This is now year four?

Year four. Wow, that's crazy. Yep, and honestly this isn't my favorite one yet. I'm just like really feeling my look, like my linen suit. Honestly the linen suit is like a vibe on you. No I know, I was like I'm gonna save this suit for Zach to try. Yeah, to a wedding on the beach or something. No, it's really a vibe, I see why he enjoys it so much. Yeah, no, fabulous.

Fabulous, bloody fabulous. Breva, you look fabulous in your royal garb. Well, as you know, part of being the next heir to the throne is my royal duties in the Air Force. I know you know nothing about that, brother, seeing as how you spent your formative years in Las Vegas, but I have actually spent lots of time in the Air Force, and it has been one of the most, if not the, gratifying experience of my life. Kate and I are,

Catherine and I are honored to have been a part of the Air Force. It's quite a wonderful organization. I'm happy for you, bruvva. Know that I am. Okay. Grandmother in studio, Grandmother, is this your first podcast?

Good question. It is. Yeah, so we've got Queen Elizabeth on the podcast, just like a little spectacular. Gran, what are your thoughts on the podcasting medium? I think it's great. I think it's a little saturated. However, I think that is right. I think this is a great one. Gran just shading us.

Gran just shook up the industry. Gran! Gran! Well, we of course are delivering the Fast Five. We're giving you a regular show today just in our royal garden. You know, royal, this is the thing about royalty and as William would say, like,

it's just something you're born into. Like, it's not a choice, it's a lifestyle. Yeah. And I definitely feel that way. Like, I was meant to be royal. The royal life chooses you. 100%. You don't choose it. And it chose me and I said, no thank you, brother.

You passed out, brother. said, no thank you brother. He passed out brother. That's exactly what you said. You said not today brother, not today. Well, we, you know, I actually think it might be beneficial for Harry to hear what's been going on at Buckingham Palace since he's been departed for Canada. Yes, grandmother, how has your quarantine been? It's been lovely. I've had a lot of kettle I mean lots of lots of tea and you know, it's just chilled with the staff and to be quite honest the

The palace has how do you Americans say a better vibe? You know say what Gina say quah without you and Megan, you know stinking up the place Wow, brother Well, the drama has a great vibe Wow, brother. Well, the drama- Well, Los Angeles has a great vibe for me, brother. I'm in Hollywood, bitch! Well, brother, all I can say is that your presence is not missed, and the palace is doing better, great, without you. And that's all we invited you here to say, brother.

Good. Well, when I left the palace, that's all that I I wanted I wanted the best for everyone including me and my family How was the little champ by the way? Oh? He's such a cute sweet crunchy angel boy The man Archie so crunchy. He actually is really cute. He's really cute. Yeah, he's really cute. That's your great-great-grandson and brother and Brother would you like to ask how my children are how is the future? Yeah, he's really cute. That's your great-great-grandson. And brother? And brother. Would you like to ask how my children are? How is the family?

The future heir to the thrones? How is the family, brother? The family is just delightful. You know, Kate is just popping them out left and right, even though I didn't even know we had sex still, but she's just popping them out left, right, left, right. It's fucking wild. And the kids, they're just getting so big and so annoying. And I just don't know what to do

because I'm from Africa now. The accent's very hard. Very hard. It was hard to stay in it when you're so. I literally go from British to French to Australian. I feel like the Brits are very staid, not very emotional, so when I'm just popping off I just become like a cowboy.

No, Irish, yeah. It's really hard not to just automatically become southern, like even though the regions are just not that close. No, they're not. But you are the Prince of Wales. Well the people of Welsh, no, the Welsh people are some of my favourite. What a wonderful Providence. I actually... Province?

Province. And I don't know if father ever told you this story because he hates you and he probably didn't, but he actually gave a speech in Wales, in Welsh, and it was one of the most defining moments of his career. The Welsh are a very proud people, brother. Yes. I would expect nothing less. You sound like Drake and Josh. Yes. Brother! Hug me, brother!

Hug me, grandmother! Um... Grandma, can I have a hug? Sure. Okay, later. You come here. We actually have a great show because we have Fast Five Stories and Southern Charm started last night, as did Keeping Up with the Kardashians. So we've been keeping up with them Kardashian girls. Very interesting.

Yes, I've heard you and Megan are really trying to cozy up to that Hollywood scene. Yes, yes, we've met Kim before, very beautiful woman. Yes, very beautiful, very, how do you Americans say? How do we say? What do we say? How do you Americans say, she's very hot? Yeah, hot. Hot, I quite enjoy the Kardashian girls.

Brother, if you actually do end up becoming acquaintances with her, do let me know. I'll have to make a visit to the States. Okay, brother. Okay, so I think maybe like without further ado we should dive in. Yeah, let's dive in. It's the Toasterween. We got some great stories for you today. So without further ado, it is time for the Fast Five stories that you need to know. What are they? Before you wake up and take a bite

of your morning toast, brother. What? I can't. Today's episode of Toast Herstory is brought to you by Lissy Skincare, created by an esthetician and toaster who struggled with acne for over 10 years. She could not find anything to really clear up her acne

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Love ya, bye. Because I'm very stressed, brother. Me too, brother. What do you have to be stressed about? The way you do the world. Would you look at me? I don't have any bloody hair! I'm not talking to you.

I don't have any bloody hair, grandmother! And you won't pay for the hair plugs! So what the fuck am I supposed to do, grandmother? Have the taxpayers pay for them. Oh my God, bloody hell, I've been balding since the time I was 12. Nobody in this fucking palace seems to give a shit. You look wonderful, grandmother.

You don't have any money. No, grandmother, you hold the keys to my fortune, and I can't go. I've been trying to fly to Turkey. Ask your father. I've been trying. Ask your father. I've been trying to fly to Turkey. Ask your father. I've been trying. Ask your father. I've been trying to fly to Turkey for the last three years

to get a special hair plug procedure, but nobody in this fucking Kam family cares about anything other than bloody Harry and his bloody fucking drama. Ask your father. Jesus. Sorry to take the Lord's name in vain, grandmother, but I'm upset. Brother, get a job.

Oh, oh. Do some Instagram sponsorships like the rest of us. Sorry to take the name Lord's name in vain grandmother, but I'm upset brother get a job. Oh Do some Instagram sponsors like the rest of us? Not all of us can just rub elbows with Bob Iger and make a 50 million dollar deal for our wives Some of us obey the rules Well, brother look where I got you ball No, I just feel like William's like definitely deeply insecure about his hair. Like nobody takes him seriously. He can get it fucking fixed, okay?

You know what? He can at this point because then everyone knows that he got fixed. It's too late. No, but then he'd be like, he'd be a speaker for people. I think he looks great. I think he looks great. He'd be a speaker for hair blogs. I don't know, I'm not really hating like the bald look on me.

No, I think you look great. I think he looks great. I think I look fabulous. Sorry, brother. I didn't mean to, it's not very royal of me. I apologize. I know you don't care about being royal, but some of us still do.

Excuse me. I'm the Duke of Sussex, bitch. Not anymore. Not anymore. Still, I got that trademark. No, you don't. No, you can't use it. Stay tuned for merch drops.

Ah! Okay, first story is about us, bruvah. What is the British tabloid saying about us again? The press is saying our royal rift was sealed by fate. And Diana. And you know bruvah, that makes me feel better because this was destiny. What are you saying? What's the story?

Bruvah, Prince Harry and Prince William were once the closest of friends, there for each other through thick and thin. Those were the days, Brava. Those were the days. Charmingly choosing to rent a cottage together while training to become helicopter pilots in 2009. That's so cute and steamy. Quote, I do a fair bit of tidying up after him.

He snores a lot too. He keeps me up all night long, William had said at the time. Just over a decade later, jokes are on thin ground. With William in London and Harry in Montecito, there are 5,500 miles between them. They're also in incredibly different head spaces. Quote, the rift gets more serious with every passing day. British historian Robert Lacey told the post of the feud

that caught fire after Harry and wife Meghan quit the house of Windsor in March. So the rift is just, it's astronomical. How do we come back from this, brother? How do we come back to each other, brother? If I'm going to be quite honest, I'm hap- Brother, on a very serious note, I'm very happy for you, but I just feel as though you owe the Crown an apology.

Well, brother, I've been watching the crown and I agree bloody Americans I agree the crown is a wonderful institution grandmother you are an icon everything of the sort and I'm sorry if I let you down but I had to do what was best for my family and I'm sorry that that was not what was best for this family but the monarchy is most important I know the You have to protect the monarchy. I will, Gran. No, you will. I'll protect the monarchy from Montesito, I swear. I'm sorry, brother. I hope we can be close again even though you just touched your nose.

Brother, I do appreciate the sentiment, but I'm afraid it's too late. So the rift runs deeper, huh? The rift runs deeper. The historian was right. I just, I hope that, you know, 100 years from now, the monarchy is not permanently changed because of your actions. And I just, I don't know how you sleep at night. I sleep quite well. Thank you with Palmer's help I understand your concern, but I had to do what was best for my family and I'll leave it at that brother. Okay

Also little royal news about mom and dad Prince Charles felt dad Prince Philip pushed him into marrying Princess Diana The royal biographer says this came out today and honestly, this doesn't sound like news I think we all knew that, especially if you watch the crown, but also if you just like are on the earth. If you just like are, have a brain. He wanted to marry Camilla Parker-Bolt. He couldn't. He married Diana. Things didn't go well. He eventually married Camilla. But I guess that's news because this royal biography is saying that he told some of his friends that he felt pressurized into marrying Diana because Philip said, you've either got to marry her or let

her go. You can't string a young girl along she's only 19 you can't string her along. That's actually good advice though. That is good advice and I think that's literally exactly what we'll see in this season of The Crown premiering November 15th. Oh I gotta catch up. Speaking of royal. You are the crown grandmother it's in your head. Speaking of royal autobiographies, brother I meant to tell you I had a chance to read your non-affiliated autobiography, Founding Freedom, and I just have to say what a crock of shit. Crock of poo. Yeah. Of poo. Real, how you Americans say, propaganda. I don't know why my accent keeps going in and out. Yes, brother, I know.

But I had to get my story out there. Yes, I understand. Feels like a gang up on Harry. Well, welcome to the royal family, bitch. Yeah. When you've been gone for so long, brother, we haven't had an opportunity to talk to you about all the drummings and the circuit de soleil around your family and your name. Gran, you said a swear word. Gran said a swear word. Gran said a swear word. Gran, that's a nickel in the swear jar. Yeah gran. A gran.

A nickel towards your hair bun. Okay next story, some big news in my country of America. Jost married Scarlett Johansson and Colin Jost, tie the knot in an intimate ceremony. Scarlett and Colin Jost have officially said I do the couple tied the knot in an intimate ceremony over the weekend. The Instagram account for Meals on Wheels America announced on Thursday, right? That's what's

I'm confused about. So Meals on Wheels broke the story saying we're thrilled to break the news that Scarlett Johansson and Colin Joe's were married over the weekend in an intimate ceremony with their immediate immediate family and loved ones

following COVID-19 safety precautions as directed by the CDC. Their wedding wish is to help make a difference for vulnerable older adults during this difficult time by supporting Meals on Wheels America. Please consider donating to celebrate the happy couple by clicking the link in our bio." So they let Meals on Wheels make the announcement so that Meals on Wheels would get press and more donations. Okay it seems bizarre because like literally two of the richest people in the world like why don't you just give the money to wheels on wheels.

Well, I'm going to assume that they donated but then they're also just using this opportunity for philanthropic cause and as someone who's very steeped in philanthropy. Yes, your book made sure to mention that 25 times. I think this is a wonderful idea. Congratulations to the Joasts. Yeah, is a wonderful idea. Congratulations to the Joast's. Yeah, brothers trying to get them invited to the next party. I want to host SNL Colin. Let me on. I'll show you a real party Colin. Honestly I feel like that could happen. That could happen. 100% I think I would be fabulous. Let me on, Colin. I'll show you a real party.

A real party like the crown. By the way, that's definitely like a remote possibility in the next five years. At least Meghan Markle. Either, oh, we could do it together. I feel like we're more likely to see Harry than we are to see Meghan. She could perform, I could sing my favorite song.

What's your favorite song, brother? What's your favorite song brother what's your favorite song brother Challenge! Hey, sister. Hey, brother. Hey, granny. Hey, brother. Hey, granny. Hey, brother. Hey, granny. Hey, brother. Hey, granny. Hey, brother. Hey, granny. Hey, brother.

Hey, granny. Hey, granny. Hey, granny. Hey, granny. Hey, granny. Hey, granny. Hey, granny. Hey, granny.

Hey, granny. Hey, granny. Hey, granny. Hey, granny. Hey, granny. Hey, granny. Hey, granny. Oh my god. Oh my god. My stomach hurts, Gran. Oh my god. Gran, I have to go party. Gran, do you have some Pepto-Pismo, Gran?

No, ask the buts. Oh my god. Oh my god. This is too funny, okay. Well congratulations to the Joes. Can't wait to see you in New York when I'm be traveling there. Dude, you're like this thirsty prince.

Like, literally like, you're using every story as like come to my house in Montecito, Colin. Like you're being fucking crazy. We'll crack some jokes, man. Yes, Colin, I've got lots of jokes for Saturday night live. Oh my God. The thirsty prince. The thirsty prince. Well, not prince no more.

The thirsty Duke of Sussex. Not even. Not even. The thirsty prince. The thirsty prince. Well, not prince no more. The thirsty duke of Sussex. Not even. The thirsty American citizen. The thirsty commoner. That's literally what you are. Commoner. Can't relate. Can't relate.

Commoner. I live in a palace. OK, next story about some other brothers who we love. We love brothers. We love the Jonas Brothers. Oh you know the Jonas Brothers played at a state dinner. Oh you must have missed it because you were out dressing up as a Nazi. Yes that's what you were doing. Yes yes yes. How could we forget? But that weekend the Jonas they were big in America. Big. Big. What are you saying?

Quite large. Large. Thank you. It's hard to say big in a British accent. Large in America at the time. They were these very talented young brothers. And yes, you were busy, like I said, dressing up as a Nazi in a hotel room in Las Vegas, but you miss this state dinner where, dinner where the Jonas Brothers performed. Gran, quite enjoyed them, right Gran? Quite enjoyed them. It was a lovely evening. Lovely. What's your favorite song Gran? I like Burning Up. Gran, and you also like that new one. Oh, Roller you. Oh, roller coaster? Roller coaster.

That was sucker. Yeah, sucker. That's the one you like, Gran. No, I like roller coaster. You play it at night. I know what I like. I know what I like. Gran, I'm telling you, we've got it on vinyl for you.

Oh, Gran, for your gramophone. But yes, like I said. Gramophone? That's like where you play a record, gramophone. Right, yes, but Harry, he wasn't there. Where was he? Oh, right, yes. He was dressing up as a Nazi in Las Vegas.

Must you continue to bring that up, brother? I just couldn't remember why you weren't at the state dinner and then I remembered, oh, right, it's because you were dressing up, well, oh, yeah, as a Nazi. I'm sorry. You must have been hanging out with I'm sorry. With granddaddy Philip too much. Shade.

Well, our favorite other brothers, the Jonas Brothers, are ready for the holidays with a new song, I Need You Christmas. It's so good. It's so good. So good. Christmas came early for the Jonas Brothers fans, including Queen Elisa Snitch,

the band of brothers released a nostalgic dripped Christmas ballad Thursday called I Need You Christmas the lyrics of which celebrate the kind of joy 2020 could really use right now. It's a really good it's hard to make original Christmas music pretty much everyone just puts out like an album of covers. They did one last year too. It's really good this one I really enjoyed it. Did they put out last year? Um you know their faces were all in the ornaments for the promo. Oh yeah. Oh my god, I can't remember. Yeah, but this one's good.

I think this one might make the Jackie ho ho ho playlist. Oh, what a prestigious honor. Yes. I like the song a lot. Nick actually sounds very good on it. You know, I take any opportunity to jab at Nick, but he sounds really good. Yeah. I'm just talking back to toaster weens of years past where the Jonas Brothers were on

this show. We're on the same show that the Jonas Brothers were once on, brother. Gran, who's your favorite brother? Joe. Joe. Because I love Sophie Turner. Oh, were you a fan of the Game of Thrones, mother? Loved it. She is the crown jewel of this country, Gran.

Truly making Great Britain proud all across the US. We love Sophie. We love Sophie. We love Sophie. We do love. And we love that show, don't we, Gran? We used to watch together. No, we didn't. Before you left the family for good.

Well that was after the finale, I said, why would I stay here? There's nothing to watch on TV. There's nothing left for me here. No more Sundays with Gran. I'm gone. Gran? What do you say we get a spot of tea after this? Harry, sorry, I know you can't come, but Gran, spot of tea?

I would love one. Maybe some, um, biscuits and cookies? Yes, yes, I'll have the butler. I'll let them know. I'm hungry too, Gran. Could I have a good time? You don't get to eat. Don't they have McDonald's where you're from?

Yes, it's very good. Thank you for reminding me. I'm going to go for a McFlurry. Okay, next story. Next story, this is actually really beautiful. Kanye West gave Kim Kardashian thank you for reminding me I'm going to go for a McFlurry. Okay next story. Next story, this is actually really beautiful. Kanye West gave Kim Kardashian a hologram of her dad for her birthday. Holograms are the new candy gram. Kim Kardashian revealed that husband Kanye surprised her with an unusual present

for her 40th birthday this week. A hologram message from her deceased father Robert Kardashian. Kim announced the gift on Twitter calling it the most thoughtful gift of a lifetime and a special surprise from heaven. It is so lifelike she added we watched it over and over filled with emotion. Robert who died in 2003 says you're 40 and all grown up you look beautiful just like when you were a little girl I watch you and your sisters and brothers and the kids every day. Well you know I saw a lot of people being like this is so weird. Like, please don't ever do this for my birthday.

And even Meghan McCain was like this. And you know, Meghan McCain is very vocal about like grieving her dad. And she was like, honestly, like nobody, please don't ever do this for me. Like, it's so weird. I think it's so nice. But see, the thing is, is that the Kardashians lost their dad at like a similar age that we did. And it's like, honestly, when you lose your dad at a young age, and it's literally been

so long, like you literally literally forget what they look like and their mannerisms. So I could see how people would think that this is weird, but I actually think we relate to the Kardashians. And I think that this is actually very cool because so much time has passed and you were so young and you didn't get that much time with them. Like, Meghan McCain lost her dad now. I don't know how old she is, but she's in her 30s. That's a lot of time, whereas Kim and everyone, they lost their dad when they

were 15, 16. So that's when we did. And you literally don't know how old she is, but she's in her 30s. That's a lot of time, whereas Kim and everyone, they lost their time when they were 15, 16. So that's when we did, and you literally don't remember them. So a hologram is crazy. Crazy. When I first read the headline, I was like, oh, this is gonna be weird. And then I watched the video,

and I was just thinking of what that would be like. For us. If it were for us, and that would be the most amazing thing. Especially because people who have lost their parents as adults, your parent has met your partner, hopefully met your kids. Sees where your life is now and has told you

that they're proud of you. But if you've lost a parent 10, 15, 20 years ago and then they literally are being brought to life and saying the sweetest things, I think that this is the most amazing gift ever. Literally a gift from heaven. And it did seem extremely lifelike. Yeah, I thought it was so sweet.

And like people were like making fun of it. I just feel like Kim's having a bad week, but I loved it. I thought it was so sweet. And like, I understood exactly why she thought it was so special. Yeah, like honestly, it's the most creative gift I've ever heard of. 100%. And people aren't, some people they're not here for it.

And I actually can understand that. Cause when I saw the headline headline I was like, nah, but in practice I think it's an amazing gift. It's truly not for everyone. But I think there are people who would absolutely like this. Appreciate it. So if anyone wants to make me a hologram, let me know. How much do you think that is?

I don't know. I feel like he just has hologram technology in his studio. We just put it towards this. And like Elon Musk just like came over and programmed it. Yeah. Look I think it was free. Yeah like you make holograms of like artists on tour you can you know he probably just went into that studio like booked some time and made a hologram. But I guess like I don't know I don't understand how they can like get his like mannerisms and his voice. And yeah and his like language and saying like things.

Poofy. Yeah I'm sure they use old videos and stuff. It really is interesting. You know, I thought it was really sweet and very cool and I liked it. I liked it too. I understand not for everyone, but I'm here for it. Me too. Are you ready for a fifth and final story?

A fifth and final? Yeah. Fifth and final. Yeah, bruv. Let's do it, bruv. Because someone you mentioned, Elon Musk, Grimes reveals her five month old son with Elon Musk is into radical art. He just actually is.

No, I mean I too. What's radical art? Ask grandmother. At five months I was into literature. That's why I'm going to be the next king and not you, but literature, radical art, like lots of... Well, Elon, I think this is fabulous. If you want to give me a call and we can talk about it. The Thirsty Prince strikes again. Grimes has a mini art critic on her hands. The singer revealed that her son at nearly six months old is already forming his own opinions in an interview with the New York Times. Arguing that babies do have taste, she said that they definitely like some things they don't

like other things they fully have opinions. I do agree with that. 100%. But I wouldn't necessarily call... actually I think I would call Kayla an art critic. So that's what I was gonna say. So our niece, Makayla, is similar age as a EX12 angel, 52, 97, 81. And she calls him X for short, by the way. Got it. I think that Makayla is definitely showing signs of like extreme interest in radical art and literature and poetry and cinema. And I believe that five-month-olds are definitely, while they may not articulate their interests, they definitely have very strong views on radical art.

I agree. Like my son Archie, he's a radical art critic as well. If you want to get the kids together, Elon, maybe we could talk shop. Shop, shop, shop. Brother, I can tell you're losing your British accent quite a bit ever since journeying over to the States. Yes, the States have been very influential on me. Howdy y'all, I'm Prince Harry.

How y'all doin'? It's me, Prince Harry, all the way from Cambridge. Now living in Montecito. Mon- It's fabulous. How's Montecito? Oh brother, you've got to come this time of year. It is fabulous.

None of that British rain and sludge. We've got sunshine and bikinis. You've got sunshine and poor air quality. So I hope you enjoy that brother. Thank you brother. Nothing like the British small. Always raining on my parade. No wonder you're a Brit, always raining.

Hey Gran, how you doing Gran? Gran, it's Gran. It's Gran. Fabulous, fabulous. I'm hungry. Me too Gran. I'm hungry too Gran. Gran, please join me after this. Gran don't worry, we'll get a spot of tea after this and I'll take care of you. I'm hungry. Me too, Gran. I'm hungry too, Gran. Gran, Gran, please join me after this.

Gran, don't worry, we'll get a spot of tea after this and I'll take care of you. I'll get you biscuits and crumpets and all the things you like. Scones. Those little blueberry scones that they make down at the bakery. I know you like those, Gran. Yes, I do. Gran, could I come please? Gran, I'm so hungry. I don't think so. No. It's Royals only. Royals stuff, yeah. Gran! Sorry, brother. I could use a spot of tea, please. You could try Sears. Why don't you go get a coffee?

Yeah, yeah. Oh, Grunt! Why don't you go with your New York friends and get some coffee, Harry? Oh, Grunt, please. Grunt. Grunt. Let's move into our TV recap segment.

Yes, let's move right into it. I've been watching a lot of TV in America. They've got fabulous shows. The reality TV that we was on last night was Keeping Up with the Kardashians and Southern Charm started. Yes, I watched Kardashians first. Let's start there.

OK, I watched Southern Charm first. So, bruvah, how do we know who gets to go first? Oh, bruvah, it's an age-old question between us. Keeping Up with the Kardashians. It was really good, actually. Like, I feel like in a lot of ways, it felt like a PSA for coronavirus. Yes, it really did and it was virtually filmed which is so crazy but they did an amazing job with the two camera angles and then they had interviews that they clearly filmed in their homes months later.

And I thought they did such a good job. I didn't feel like I was watching like a torturous virtual experience. I totally agree. I thought tech wise, it was really, really well done. And how much like they were willing to show. Because like Kim was literally with the four kids, Kanye was quarantined and I don't think she had any of her staff. So she was literally like taking care of all four kids full time while they were in school and still managed to film. And then Chloe's like literally on death's door

and she's still managing to film too. But it's like, where was Courtney? You know? Yeah. Oh, I guess then they showed that Courtney and Scott went to Palm Springs. And then Chloe's like literally on death's door and she's still managing to film too, but it's like, where was Courtney? Yeah. Oh, I guess then they showed like Courtney and Scott went to Palm Springs with the kids, which was cute. And it's nice to see them like together and like put some like pieces together with the headlines

of like Courtney and Scott are quarantined together. Like, what does this mean? It means that they both love their kids and want to spend time with them. I loved like seeing so much of Chloe's bedroom. Like it's literally the most beautiful bedroom. Like dream bedroom. I felt bad that she was so sick

and literally couldn't leave her room, but I'm like of all the places to be quarantined, her bedroom has a living room off the side and then I'm sure her master bathroom is so sick. I was obsessed with her room too. Her bed looks so comfortable. So comfortable. She really has a nice decorating style.

I feel like her decor is the most. Unique decorating style. I feel like her decor is like the most. Unique. No, I feel like Kim's is like super unique, but Chloe's is like the most livable and like where you would actually want to live. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Kylie also though. Yeah.

Oh yeah, Kylie jumped in. We got a little bit of Kylie, yeah. Yeah, it was like kinda lame. No, and it's also like, give me something or don't. Yeah, and she already like shared that on Snapchat. Like that was a story like that She had said that she had to quarantine for her pregnancy but by the way Kim literally looked so beautiful like running around

Calabasas like just walking over to her mom's house and like Walking around her house like while the kids were in school like her face and her hair like she looked so stunning Yeah, she really did she really does it all I liked the episode because I felt like it really symbolized what a lot of people were Going through in quarantine which is like one being lonely to like worrying worrying so deeply about like your older family members like when they were just like worried for MJ because like she had already been quarantined for two months because of her hip surgery and now she wasn't gonna be able to Leave and like they were just like crying and Chris was like, please call MJ today Like it's so sad and that's what like a lot of people were dealing with I feel like they actually did a really good job of like capturing the

Like the vibe of what lockdown was especially like the first week. Yeah the first few weeks like really missing your family. Yeah. And feeling lonely. Yeah but when Kim was like should we go to Wyoming like cuz she had a house like that is just the vibe like to be able to be like should we just like go to Wyoming? Yeah but they didn't. No I know because of Connie couldn't fly and neither could MJ. Yeah. But when MJ finally got to Palm Springs I felt like a wave. I was like what she should stay there like I just went for lunch I feel like like it I don't think she was moving in like I think just Chris was

just getting her out of the house for like a day. Oh really? Yeah I don't think she was staying there but I feel like she should have. Me too. I don't know she probably has all her things at home like and likes her space. Yes, and I feel like the older you get like everyone worries about you in your house, but like you actually like being home. Yeah, yeah. Well, I thought it was a great episode. I felt so bad for Chloe. You could actually tell like when she was starting to feel better like she was literally you know when you get like really sick or like you're really, really not feeling well and then like you feel so much better

and like you are literally so grateful to God like for this gift. She like, she was becoming like a preacher. She was like, God bless us all. The Lord brought me out of this. Like I know that feeling when you're in so much pain and you don't know like if you're gonna die and like God brings you out of it.

You become a woman of God. And like literally Chloe was like, praise be. Like. Yeah, she said that like a million times. And like, I knew exactly what she meant. I can't believe how bad she got it. I know. Like right at the beginning.

And she didn't even go to Paris. Like. She was like being super careful. And it was crazy how they were like, Kanye and Chloe were so sick, like so, so sick. And they were like, maybe it's Corona. Now it's like, if you have those symptoms, like duh, finish. Of course. but it was very dramatic like Kim Kardashian

West test negative yes Kanye West positive Chloe Kardashian positive it was really like eerie yeah very eerie really good episode really well done filming I think some of the best quarantine content if not the best I agree I agree and good for Kim and Chloe once again for putting the show on their backs Right even when Chloe was literally on death store, right? Like she literally just set up a camera like 24 hours in her room while she was being miserable It's not like she turned it on to like go cough in her bed No, she was just like letting herself be filmed like being so sick. Totally

And then southern charm was back and you know what? I actually thought it was like a great episode. It usually is. Yeah, and I love That new guy like I really ship him in Madison. I know Okay, so we need to talk about there's new is he a new cast member was that like announced? Yes There's two yes, and that girl who's friends with Cameron. Yes, and so this is what I think happened because I remember her from other seasons and like she's really like one of Cameron's best friends and I think Cameron brought her on the show and was like come on the show and it was like great and then I think like Cameron was supposed to do this season but heard that like it was starting off with like Catherine talking about her husband having an affair and she was

like nope I'm done with this show like fuck this yeah and that's why her friends on it but she's not and that's why they were like is Cam coming to the party because like they weren't sure they wouldn't ask that about Someone who's not a cast member anymore, but they thought she was still gonna be a cast member and it's clear that She decided like once they started filming like no no no I'm not doing this anymore And even though like Catherine was so wrong to say those things Especially if they're not true and even if they are true like it's just not her business like I understand why Catherine is I'm sorry No, I'm 100% on team Catherine.

Like I understand why Catherine will be mad at Cameron forever. To the day she dies. Yeah. And by the way, I don't know if those rumors aren't true, but I heard them too. And it was like maybe a year ago, probably around the time that this was filming,

like I heard all that, there were all those like Instagrams of people being like, I met her husband, whatever. Like there were legitimate rumors. And like why does Cameron get protected when literally Catherine's rehab, her custody, her relationship with Thomas, none of that got protected. Like it was literally all put on display and Cameron was like the self,

she put herself in charge as like the moral compass of the show, so like she was the narrator and like whatever she said goes. Honestly. Do you like whoever's like, she was against you, we're against you. She literally. I'm so team Catherine. Fueled so much of the dislike against Catherine. whatever she said goes. Honestly, do you like whoever's, she was against you, we're against you. She literally- I'm so team Catherine.

Fueled so much of the dislike against Catherine. And she did apologize. Yeah, and she knows that and we all know that, but I understand- She never got her ass handed to her in the way that she deserved to. In the way that she handed it to so many people. Even though we love her and she's so funny

and she is such a great person, she really went really hard on Catherine for a number of years. And now Catherine- And she was wrong. Now Catherine can finally get her revenge. And I don't like think that that's how it should go. An eye for an eye. But I understand why Catherine feels that way.

100% no, I was actually like, I'm like go. Like the way that she did it more intentionally whereas like Cameron, what she did to Catherine was like over many years and was way more sneaky but I don't know part of me just like did not feel bad at all like yeah sorry that first of all this is what it's like on a reality show and be especially this type of reality show where people's dirty laundry has been aired for years and most of it was Catherine's yeah I understand my Catherine like I I wouldn't have done it but I understand my

Catherine didn't care and Catherine was just gonna say she looks great Catherine has finally embraced a middle part and I'm so excited about it. Yeah, and when they were flashing back to like the things that Catherine has, Cameron has said about Catherine, they didn't even really choose the worst ones. They just like chose ones where she was like not interested in Catherine drama. But like she was very hard on Catherine for so many years. I agree 100%. So that's how I feel about that.

I think Craig is like literally the world's best friend. Like he's able to be a friend to Catherine and Cameron at the same time. And I think everything that he did in that situation was right, like he knew that this shouldn't come up on camera, like he's, and he told that to Catherine. He's telling Cameron what's happening. I think he's doing a great job.

What I like about Southern Charm is that like, I really genuinely like most of the cast. Yeah, me too. And honestly, I was really hating Shep last season, but I feel like he's having a come to Jesus moment. He's in a relationship. He started therapy. He was such an asshole last season,

especially to Madison and then that Instagram story thing. I can't believe they put that in the show. He was just obviously in a bad place in his life, and I love that they're addressing it head on, and it seems like he's really like in a good place with like this very normal girl who's like bringing him down to earth. Yeah, no, I look forward to watching the rest of that journey. Also, oh, this is what I was gonna say, I genuinely like most of the cast and the people who like I've

hated are gone. Me too. Like Ashley, yeah, Landon, yeah, Thomas, I thought seeing Thomas. Was chills. Chilling. Yes. It was so eerie. Yes. And he's part of the cast now from what I've heard. Really? Yeah, I thought like, or maybe not like a full cast member,

but like he's gonna be on the show. And I just think that is so weird. I think it's wrong. I think it's wrong and it was so weird to see him. And the other person who I fucking hate, who never got what was deserved on the show. Can I guess, Patricia? No. Oh, but we should talk about her.

JD. Oh, agreed. But he was also never a full-time cast member. No, but like he did so much damage and so much shit talking and another one who just went so hard on Catherine and then all his chickens came to roost and we never saw it on the show. It was just like in Charleston press,

like that he's literally like bankrupt and a fraud and like a literal piece ofost. And we never saw it on the show. It was just like in Charleston Press. Like they just literally like bankrupt and a fraud and like a literal piece of shit. And like a predator. Yeah. So that like, I'm glad that all the people that I really don't like are gone. It makes it much more pleasant to watch. To watch a bunch of people who like,

I actually think are good people. And I love Madison and Austin. I don't know if they're end game because like when she was just talking to that guy and like they have kids and it's like, it's true. Like, and Patricia said it really well like Austin is a frat boy and like yes Madison is just in a different place in her life like she has kids and she's really so mature like even just watching her morning routine with

her kid like my god she's so busy and Austin's still asleep like I actually feel what Patricia was saying. Yes I feel like what she was saying too and I want to see where this goes maybe it will even if I do sort of think Madison and Austin are endgame they like Can't quit each other. Yeah, and she's like such a smart girl. Yeah She just loves him. So but maybe her, you know wandering off with it Like this guy will inspire Austin to step it up Yeah, but like we've been waiting for Austin to we've been waiting for all these dudes like step it up like since we met them

But Craig stepping it up just gonna say that Shep is trying to step it up. Yep, I agree. So, Patricia. I just hate her. Like I just don't understand why this older woman is literally. Why would she had Shep's party? Yeah, she was like, where's the catering? I'm like, this is a party where people get blacked out,

Patricia, you wanna go out to dinner, go across the street to the steak house. But like, that's not what it is. Like her being at that party makes no sense. Like, and her having parties at her house, dinner parties at her house, where literally every person there is 30 years old, like, makes no sense.

And I just think if we're not gonna, you know, at least talk about how weird it is, then I can't get on board. I feel like you and I always talk about how weird it is, and it's like, finally she's coming around, but she is another one who was so, so horrible about Catherine. And Catherine has forgiven her, and they've moved on and they have a friendship,

but I just feel like so many people in this cast were just on the wrong side of history. It would have been dangerous. I know, and I don't know how Catherine works with them. They're so evil. I know. But you know, Catherine's not perfect either. So, and they're really all seem to be like actually friends

Yeah, and that's why the show really works. I thought it was a good episode It looks like it's gonna be a really good season. One person who left who I miss is Chelsea Yeah, I really liked her and Naomi and Naomi, but I understand like I understand I actually respect people who know when to walk away agreed like Tinsley like yeah You know There's a time for everything and there's also a time to say goodbye and so... And for you, apparently, that was this year when you decided to move to Canada. Yes, 2020 has been a crazy one, hasn't it been, brother? Well, honestly, at Buckingham Palace, it's been relatively unchanged,

seeing as how the staff has all been quarantined with us, and we're really living at regular pace, although a lot of our state visits have been derailed which has been lovely for Gran and I were spending lots of time in the garden drinking tea she's gotten very very close with Katherine my wife I don't know if you know her um and it's just been wonderful for the family we've never been closer wouldn't you agree Gran? It's true. Well I've never been closer with my family brother so I'm glad we're all living the lives that we so choose. Choose, yes, I agree, brother. And you know, after all is said and done,

family is family. Family is family. Put her there. Oh, brother. Oh, clammy, oh my God. You've got a lot on my plate, brother. Anything else the royals want to say before we wrap up this toaster ween 2020?

Gran, thank you for coming on our show. Thank you for having me. It is an honor to have a woman of your stature. Truly an honor. Snitch, we miss you. I miss you guys too. Oh yes, Snitch. We have Snitch on the toast.

I'm under here too. We haven't had the Snitch cam in forever. How are you? Did you miss us? Yes, I did. But you're living life and you're just happy and you don't want to come back here. Exactly.

How's Knowles? She's so good she's fabulous she's really growing up it's really sad but she's she's great. She's got her own personality like she is in another world she's gonna get a cell phone soon like be texting all her friends like you want to ask Harry how oh how's Bruno I mean like I had asked off-camera but yes he's really good he's so cute I met him yesterday and Lee Till what did you think of the man? So fucking cute like oh I mean, like I had asked off camera, but yes. He's really good. He's so cute. I met him yesterday. And lethal. What did you think of the man? So fucking cute.

Like, oh my God, like I love him so much. He's so cute. He just has like such a great energy, you know? He's very Zen, I feel, at least for now. I can't believe you have a puppy. I know. It's so crazy. It's the craziest thing.

I'm so excited to get the group together. They'll bring the family together, the children. We literally have so many dogs. We have like, what do they call it? Like a... A troop. No, like when you give birth, like the... litter. We have a litter. We do. We have so many dogs. We've got to get the kids together to play. Yes, bring them to the garden. Oh, I forgot you're not allowed back at Buckingham Palace. Maybe you can give me a visitor's pass for the day. Maybe. For Archie.

I'll talk to Mother about it and we'll see. For Archie. We'll talk to Mother and we'll see. That's all I can say. For Archie. For Archie. For Archie. Dr. Fa-ah-chi. I'll talk to mother about it. Fa-ah-chi. We'll talk to mother and we'll see. That's all I can say. Fa-ah-chi. Fa-ah-chi. Fa-ah-chi. Dr. Fa-ah-chi. Anything else anyone wants to say before we wrap this mother up? We hope everyone has a happy happy Halloween. Can't wait to see you're healthy. Margot keep going. Tell them. Vote. Vote. Tell them all Margot. What else do they need to do? What else? Where else do you have to stay? Wash your face. Wash your them. Vote. Vote. Tell them all, Margot, what else do they need to do? What else, where else do you have to stay? Wash your face, wash your hands. Wash your hands.

Wear your mask. Be with people, don't be alone. Be nice to people. Be nice, treat people with kindness. Don't troll anyone's Instagram like this weekend. Yeah, take care of your mental health. Yeah. Just take care of yourself, guys, it's hard out there.

Listen to the- Listen to the mother fucking queen. The literal queen, listen to her. And as always, God save the queen counselor. The mother fucking queen. The literal queen. Listen to her. And as always, God save the queen. God save, and with that, we have a due adieu. God save the queen. Have a wonderful weekend, everyone. We hope you enjoyed Toasterween 2020,

and we will see you back on Monday for a regular episode. Ta ta. Ta ta.