The Toast - Tsk Tsk Tiger: Monday, March 30th, 2026

Episode Date: March 30, 2026

1. Tiger Woods Involved in Rollover Car Crash in Florida (PEOPLE) (20:10) 2. Brooks Nader is dating ‘Rocketman’ star Taron Egerton (Page Six) (28:39) 3. Tommy Hilfiger Signs Travis Kelce as Glob...al Brand Ambassador and Creative Collaborator (WWD) (32:16) 4. 4 Masked Men Steal Renoir, Matisse and Cézanne Paintings Worth Over $10 Million in 3-Minute Heist (PEOPLE) (38:20) 5. See Miss Thailand Contestant's Teeth Fall Out During Pageant (E! Online) (45:50) The Toast with Jackie (@JackieOshry) and Claudia Oshry (@girlwithnojob) ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The Toast Patreon ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Toast Merch ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Girl With No Job by Claudia Oshry ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The Camper & The Counselor⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Lean In Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:09 It's Jackson, Claude and neighbor show the fast five things you need to know. We'll start your day off, swirly. It's the toast. I sound amazing. Welcome back to The Toast and happy Monday. Hope everybody had an amazing restorative weekend. I kind of had a crazy weekend. Hey, Jax, how you're doing? I'm durn good.
Starting point is 00:00:33 My sister had a crazy weekend, though, in what sense? I did something crazy on Saturday night. Crack? Crazier. Meth? Actually crazier. than doing crystal meth. I watched Wicked for Good.
Starting point is 00:00:48 That is great. It kind of felt like everyone was doing crystal math. Like it was so crazy. I did fall asleep. I would say I missed the last third of it, two and a half hours, like is an unreasonable amount of time for a sequel. So I can't really decide if I liked it or not.
Starting point is 00:01:03 Like I was really tired. It was more so a reflection on me that I fell asleep, not so in the movie. It was just like definitively worse than the first. Was it good? Like the first was amazing. So was this at least decent? So there's really a lack of hits.
Starting point is 00:01:17 Like musically in the second act. I didn't know any of the songs. And then as I was sleeping, I heard them singing for good. And I was like, should I wake up for, because this is my favorite song. I don't really remember how the movie ends. I remember like Nessa. I didn't even remember. You know, I won't spoil it because I know you didn't see it yet.
Starting point is 00:01:33 But also I said to say, like, you can skip it. Okay. I hadn't realized I didn't see it. Like, it's not even on my list of things. It's on Peacock. So it was free. And I was like, you know what? Whatever.
Starting point is 00:01:41 They can't give it away. Literally. I guess I could see myself like one day of Zach and I are looking for a movie and that came on like, sure, sure. I'll watch it. Even if you're telling me it's like not amazing, most things aren't.
Starting point is 00:01:51 No, compared to like all the crap they put out, it's like it's actually beautifully done. Like the CGI, it's insane. But the weird thing about Wicked the movie and specifically the focus of the second film, it's like it's a lot about like the wizards plan for the animals. Like they're moving their voices.
Starting point is 00:02:05 And like I know it's a metaphor for something. But like. Something bad. Yeah. But like just seeing these animals like, really CGI, like monkeys with wings. It's a lot. Yeah, it's like, it's hard to take it seriously.
Starting point is 00:02:18 Yeah. So there was a lack of severity. But yeah, I saw wicked for good. Like, I'm crazy. You are crazy. I'm crazy because I was sick all weekend, so not restorative for me. I was hoping to feel better today.
Starting point is 00:02:31 But we have Redheads recording today. So I literally was just like, I can't read. Like, sorry. I'm sick. I'm blind. Like, I can't read. And then I was like, Saturday and I'm like,
Starting point is 00:02:40 okay, I'll read this book. Because if we don't record it, today. I don't know when the girls can record in. Like, we, this would break the redheads if I don't read the book. And like, I read the book. It's crazy that nobody's ever not read the book. Like, I know. I think sometimes. You think some people, like, didn't finish and they just, like, are quiet. Margo. Yeah. I do. But now it's actually kind of amazing because the person who chose the book has to lead the episode. So I could have gotten away. And I have 10% left and I'm going to
Starting point is 00:03:08 finish it. But like, the fact that I read this whole book in 36. I was like feeling sick with three children. Like, you guys. Admiral. I'm in shock. Would you ever get into audiobooks? So sometimes when the redheads, if it's tight, I'll listen in my car. Like I could have listened in the car this morning.
Starting point is 00:03:26 But it's not that desperate. I also think it does take longer. Yeah. And then I have to like skip ahead in my Kindle for what I did in the audio book and I have to find the audio. Like it's kind of a pain in the arts. And I'd rather just enjoy my 10 minutes. Sometimes you get to a certain point in a book. Either you're on a time crunch or you're just not enjoying.
Starting point is 00:03:42 it where you do like just skip whole paragraphs and you can't do that in an audio book. Yeah. It's a really desperate route like if I have to cook dinner and I have to. Right, right. But I think I can carve out like 30 minutes today to just read the rest before we record this afternoon. But the book was really cute. It's Margot's choice. So it's like super fun.
Starting point is 00:03:59 We read, um, this book made me think of you. That's the name of the book. Oh my God. I thought you were thinking of me. I'm like, that is so sweet. It didn't make me think of you. Hopefully because it was bad. No, just I think you would like it.
Starting point is 00:04:09 Everyone in it is disgusting and ugly. And that's why it didn't make you think of me. No, no, they're just like so unfabulous and unfodgy. Oh, okay, yeah, I agree. It's so not me. I think you would like it, though. I do. I think everybody would like it.
Starting point is 00:04:23 And Margot's choices are usually pretty likable. Okay, palatable. Yeah, yeah. That's our relatable redhead. Oh, for damn sure. What else did I do? I went to the jellyfish museum. Like, we found it on TikTok, and Ben was like, let's go to this place.
Starting point is 00:04:37 And it was like 40 minutes away. And it was kind of amazing. Oh, good. For 10 minutes. You know what I mean? It was kind of small. Well, that's sort of like a thing with you. Well, what do you mean with me?
Starting point is 00:04:48 Like, how long can you spend at the jellyfish museum? And it wasn't that huge. And like, Ruby can't run around or anything. So we showed him the jellyfish. We looked around the gift shop and like... That was that. Like, we parked our car and there was like a woman waiting by her car with her daughter. I don't know what she was waiting for.
Starting point is 00:05:01 By the time we got out of the jellyfish museum, she was still waiting there. I clocked her. I was like, oh, wow. We really must have not been in there for a while. But it was small? It was small. Yeah. There was like, and then of course,
Starting point is 00:05:14 would you recommend it? I would, actually. It was kind of fabulous. Ben was then, like, getting all ethical on me being like, do you think jellyfish know that they're like in captivity? And I was like, can you not be a vibe killer? Like, we're not going to SeaWorld, obviously. I'm an ethical consumer as well, but I'm also a mother.
Starting point is 00:05:29 And it's like, we had shit to do when it was raining. Like, sorry, we had to go to the fucking jellyfish museum. And then Ben started looking up the life of a jellyfish. And it was just like he was being such a bummer. Yeah. It's because he's reading. Oh, and because he's reading that book. Oh, so you just yourself.
Starting point is 00:05:43 Remarkably bright creatures, which is told from the POV of an octopus in an aquarium. But an octopus is bigger, thus having a bigger brain. Octopuses are actually extremely intellectual. So he was wondering, do jellyfish have the same sort of spatial awareness? They can't have brains. And it's going to be no, you know, and it's just easier to say no. Yeah. How, what is the lifespan of a jellyfish?
Starting point is 00:06:04 Six years. Yeah, I don't know if that's in captivity or out of captivity. I feel like it might be longer in captivity because, like, they're not. prayed upon. And then when we were walking in, the guy was like, okay, so for the open tanks that you could put your hand in, just be careful. I'm like, sir, I'm going to stop you right there. We're not doing that. And he kept talking. I'm like, seriously, stop wasting your fucking breath. Like, I'm not, he's like, telling you the special. Yeah, it's like, tell you the special at the restaurant. Save your fucking breath. I'm not
Starting point is 00:06:26 ordering it. Like, I've never heard a special that I'm remotely interested in. But he was like, it can be a little me. You can see. I was like, sir, seriously stop. Like, just stop. Talk to the people behind me. I'm just here. Like, do you think Ruby's putting his hand? He's like, he can't even walk. So it was just kind of a crazy day. You bet on the tan in the tan? No. Like, we were just like, we're not those people. We're not those people.
Starting point is 00:06:44 Yeah. Like, we barely want to be here. But just next time you see something on TikTok, like, it was kind of a good wreck from TikTok. My bar was really low because, like, a TikTok wreck. Yeah. And when we pulled up, it was this sort of like forlorn looking facility with like nothing around. That seems to be a theme with like kids things that you find on TikTok.
Starting point is 00:07:00 And also when we went to the balloon museum. I forgot about that. I've sort of erased it from my memory. And where did you find it on Instagram? I think Zach found, yeah, it was a Zach initiative. And I think after that, he took a major L. He wasn't allowed to, like, recommend stuff for a while. Because also the Shapiro's, like, we had to be.
Starting point is 00:07:16 We made it a whole affair. Yeah, we all, like, went there. Yeah. And it was positively demonic. Oh. It was like Balenciaga. It was so fucked up. It was really fucking weird.
Starting point is 00:07:27 Don't go. So Jellyfish Museum. We're one for one with TikTok Rex. Oh, good. Yeah. Goody. Yeah. What else?
Starting point is 00:07:34 We had a little BBQ this weekend. We paid a little mage. We did play a little mage. We got some illegal. dealings. We did. You know what? If the National Mahjongli wants to be so damn slow and make it so hard to get the new card, like people are going to have to start, you know, printing copyrighted information, which is what we did. Somebody sent us a picture. We don't have our cards yet. And their website
Starting point is 00:07:52 is so janky. It took me a week to realize I didn't even place the order. So now I'm even more, I don't have my cards yet. You can't buy them on Amazon every day. And there are people who sell it like their own versions on like Etsy or whatever, but they get shut down by NMJL. They send them like season to sis. They make it so hard, which is fine. I'll pay the NMJL, but like your website might I recommend squarespace.com slash toast? Like such a bad website. So yeah, somebody sent us a picture and we printed at Olivia's house and we were all using like really janky photo printed and sorry like we did what we had to do. Yeah, but it literally is so illegal. It's so, you know, like, but you can't prove that we did it. Yeah, because this is art and we just
Starting point is 00:08:27 and we could be like just making shit up for content. Like I just want attention because we're like really thirsty. But if we did print it, what we would have done, well, it's kind of amazing. Yeah, it wasn't amazing, but it got the job done. We were able to play. Yeah, we were able to play 2026. Yeah. Because also, like, we couldn't play 2025. Now that we've played 2026.
Starting point is 00:08:47 Waste of your time. Waste of your time. And it actually might pollute your Maj knowledge. And in case you that I'm familiar with Majong, they basically, like, change rules every year. They release a new card. It's a whole new card. And like the game of last year irrelevant.
Starting point is 00:09:00 Even if you knew every line by heart, you know nothing. So towards the end of the year, you kind of get really, really good at the game, just in time for them to change the card. Change the card. But as a card. relative novices to the 2025 card I'm happy to be on even playing field with everyone else yeah so it's like
Starting point is 00:09:14 very much level playing field yeah what are the stories today like what happened you know what like not major major for a Monday but we can get into them some there was no like major televised event last night no there was not I've gotten really like used to having like something to watch I think last Sunday it was IHart Radio
Starting point is 00:09:30 Awards was that Sunday did you watch those I did no and they were on a weekday whatever like I'm just in like at an age where I kind of need a major televised event every Sunday. Even if it's like a big football game, like something that we could all watch together. You're not the UFO.
Starting point is 00:09:45 Right. Right. You don't want to watch the Dallas Renegades? I don't. Like I, obviously for the toast, it makes it like fun for a Monday morning. But just even Ben was like, what's on? And I was like, nothing.
Starting point is 00:09:59 You know what would have been on? The Bachelorette. There's a gaping hole. Did you see that she posted? She's acting insane Wait, I need to confirm that that was posted in the last week Maybe it could have been like something my old algorithm She's very active on social media
Starting point is 00:10:15 She's leaving comments and reposting stuff on TikTok That are sort of like team Taylor Like defending her side What did she post? It's a video of her learning piano That's giving listening and learning I was just playing around and found I kind of like this
Starting point is 00:10:29 Is this a thousand red balloons? No, it's like a TikTok song I mean it's pretty good if this is her first time playing I mean, she's wearing a gray hoodie and it's from the back. It literally could be anyone. She said, I learned this today for no reason. I think I have a real future in piano. It's giving psychosis.
Starting point is 00:10:55 Like, what? That's so crazy. That is really crazy. Do you think it's giving like, I'm coming back? I'm back, y'all? She never left. You don't understand she's so active on TikTok right now. No, but there's a difference between like lurking and leaving comments and posting content.
Starting point is 00:11:09 Yeah, yeah. As if like nothing happened. I mean, there are a lot of ways. to handle a scandal. Playing piano is one of them. Like, sure, try it. You know, maybe it'll work. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:11:18 I really wonder if that's her first time playing, like, in the line. Oh, you're now wondering about, like, the validity of the video. Or she grew up playing and now she wanted to learn a thousand red balloons. That wasn't a thousand red balloons. No, but you know which one. It's a TikTok song. Dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, you know. It's like it's like a thing.
Starting point is 00:11:37 Oh, it is. No, it's a black parade. Oh, that's a thousand red balloons, me. Like, that's how it serves. Oh, okay, sure. Yeah, yeah, I feel that. It's like, it's red and black. Do you know what it?
Starting point is 00:11:47 It starts about a balloon. No, it starts about the parade. Okay. When I was a young boy, my father took me into the city to see a march in band. Ben would be so proud. He said, son, when, yet a rock, yet older. The leader of the savior, the secret of the band. And yeah.
Starting point is 00:12:17 Yeah. Okay, so that's what she's up to. Cool. Go, coo. Actually, today was otherwise going to be our first day without Slamo's story. Like nothing. The Slamo haters. Sorry.
Starting point is 00:12:30 So it's like petering out a little bit. So I guess that's why she is petering out. Yeah, no. As it should peter out. Yeah, they all need to break. Yeah. And then we'll pick back up. Okay.
Starting point is 00:12:39 Okay. Okay. Let's get into the story, shall we? Absolutely. Puzzleut. Without further a do that, do that. do, it is time for the fast five stories that you do that do need to know. Oh, also, if you're wondering why we say that. Oh my God, wait. We forgot to tell everyone we're launching merch. Oh, my God. Wait,
Starting point is 00:12:59 you're not seeing double. You're seeing new merch. You're not seeing a surprise merch drop collection. Just restocking some of our faves. This is our classic set. It comes with pants. Jackie and I are both wearing it. Yes. It's the low key classic set. We've never released this color before. This is the color of the season, you guys. It's not just cerulean blue. And as a bright spring. And, a soft autumn. This is kind of in both of our palettes. So yeah, some of our t-shirts
Starting point is 00:13:24 are iconic t-shirts that you guys love. We released some old ones, some new ones, some baby stuff. Baby stuff, hat, phone case. So if you're looking to get
Starting point is 00:13:31 a little merch or a gift, I know people love like gifting those baby onesies. 10 a.m. Eastern Time shoptoesmerch.com. Is that our website? Yeah. It will be live as you're listening to this. Yeah, I forgot to mention.
Starting point is 00:13:41 I'm wearing a size extra large. I'm a large person, but I also like everything to be a little bit oversized. Yeah, I'm wearing a large, right? now and for today I wish it was an extra large right right but like for a month from now large will suffice the shirts are one size and I know what you're going to say like one size trust like it's literally the sort of the traveling shirt it's the best shirt ever I can't have it I keep releasing
Starting point is 00:14:00 new designs like for to itself yeah so I have new shirts to wear in those you like live in those yeah shop to smirk.com oh no you're bo's you like live in those what oh no you're what your bo's your bo's I didn't know what you said I think you're talking about bo's headphones like like or bozoma St. John. Your bows. Yeah, you like living those. Yeah, I know, I know. I iconic toast reference. We should have put that in our Toasty Lingo episode. But what I was saying before you let everyone know that merch dropped is that we actually recorded a Patreon last week. That is live now. And it's all about Toasty lore.
Starting point is 00:14:34 So we put a submission box for you guys to ask like, why do you guys say Gargi or Parji or whatever saw? What's the story behind this? And we literally, so do that is. We were cracking up. We're seriously historical. It's one of our best episodes. We try and do it every couple of years because we get new people listening and then we also have new jokes, like new words. And also like if you missed it one time, you're probably scared to ask like, what's PJOM? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:14:53 So we released that on Friday. It's hysterically funny. And if you want to know why we say, without further, I do that do that do that's in the episode. Patreon.com slash toast, $7.99 cents. Every month to get five extra episodes from your swirlies. It's more pop culture.
Starting point is 00:15:08 It's more personal. It's vlogs. We've got Ben. We get living there. We get all the, uh, the supporting characters. And it's a great way to support the toast. So patreon.com slash a toast.
Starting point is 00:15:19 Today's episode of The Toast is brought to you by Carraway. My life is brought to you by Carraway. They are the most amazing cookware brand, kitchenware, everything that you need, especially if you are striving to live a more non-toxic life and an easier cleanup life, caraway for everything. So I use their pots and pans. I use them to make soup. I use them to make eggs.
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Starting point is 00:17:13 into a flexible, meaningful stream of income. So if you live for planning the perfect trip, the thrill of comparing hotels, scoring that impossible reservation, and piecing together an unforgettable itinerary, you already think like a travel advisor, you act like one, people expect you to be one all the time. Why not just be one?
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Starting point is 00:18:26 Like, you should really be getting paid for all the health that you're providing your family and friends as like the group trip planner. Everyone jokes about it. Like, no, that's your job now. Thanks to Forra. Today's episode of The Toast is also brought to you by Bake by Melissa. Finding the perfect gift can feel impossible. You want something that's thoughtful, fun, and Guadanteed to make people smile.
Starting point is 00:18:47 That's why baked by Melissa is our go-to. These bite-sized cupcakes are handcrafted, beautifully packaged, and honestly perfect for literally anyone. Bake by Melissa cupcakes are made entirely by hand and turn any moment into a celebration. Whether it's a birthday, thank you, congratulations, or sending love when you don't know what to say. I have gifted baked by Melissa so many times when I don't know what to get someone or if it's like a family and I want to send them happy birthday cupcakes or thank you cupcakes or get well soon, well wishes, like whatever it is. Baked by Melissa is always the right thing to get. And not only do I love gifting it, I love receiving it.
Starting point is 00:19:19 Like when someone sends me baked by Melissa for the holidays or whenever someone wants to send it to me, I literally makes my whole week of eating them like so much fun. They come in beautiful gift boxes that make it effortless to send something special. it's the kind of gift that works for family, friends, clients, truly anyone and everyone. It's so true. Like, it's appropriate for every occasion. There's something for every taste from classic and creative flavors to constantly rotating new options, plus gluten-free or vegan choices so everyone can enjoy. Yes, I was gifting it to a family that is a gluten-free household.
Starting point is 00:19:49 So I gave them the gluten-free baked-by-melissa cupcakes, and they just thought it was so thoughtful. And it was. Right now, baked by Melissa is offering our listeners 20% off your order at bakedbymelissa.com slash toast. That's bakedbymelissa.com slash toast for 20% off your order. Bakedbymelissa.com slash toast. Give the perfect gift every time with Baked by Melissa. Our first story, Tiger Woods was involved in a rollover car crash this weekend. Yeah. Let's talk about that. So Tiger Woods was involved in a rollover car crash in Jupiter Island, Florida law enforcement confirmed to People magazine. ABC News first reported that the pro golfer crashed on the afternoon of
Starting point is 00:20:28 Friday, March 27th. So, during a press conference on Friday, the sheriff's office said that he did exemplify signs of impairment and was placed under arrest and taken to Martin County jail. I mean, did you see the car? After the crash, yeah. And then he was like standing next to the car on his phone.
Starting point is 00:20:44 Yeah, somebody like to turn pictures of him like in the moment of and of the vehicle. And then like he's also there like just looking drunk. Yeah. They also said the golfer was charged with DUI with property damage and refused to submit to a gear analysis test at the jail. So obviously this bad, but for Tiger Woods, it's like even more bad, because I believe this is his second TUI.
Starting point is 00:21:03 Is it not his third? Third crash. Yeah, but now it makes the second one look like a drunk one. I remember the second one, everyone was telling me when I was thinking about what car I wanted to get for my mom car. They highly recommended the Genesis because that's what Tiger Woods was driving when he like drove it off a cliff and, you know, walked out without a scratch. Now in hindsight, he was obviously drunk on that one too.
Starting point is 00:21:20 And then there's like the iconic one, like with the mailbox. And with the mugshot that everybody wears on T-shirts like to his golf outings. And he like thinks it's funny. I didn't realize, like, until this moment, like, this is an alcoholic. I don't know how you're, like, the best athlete in the world while also being an alcoholic. Like, that's insane. Think of how good he would be if he wasn't an alcoholic. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:21:40 I guess he's been doing it for a while because that first crush was a while ago, and he still plays because I see him on full-fowing. So, but, you know, he is sort of past his prime anyway. Yeah, this is definitely tough for Ben's offer who's, like, actual, like, role model in this life is Tiger Woods. So I'm thinking of my husband today. But I just feel like as the DUI police that you are, the police. woman that you are like he should be top of your list you should hate him the most i do the thing is the amount of hate that i have for people is like equivalent to what i felt for them before like i literally give a fuck about tiger woods like he genuinely means nothing to me except like my husband literally
Starting point is 00:22:12 only wears his clothes ben's obsessed with his company sunday red it's like the best clothes ever been has like this fancy like he's promoting him no i know i know and ben's on the PR list for it and it's like it means so much to him but like for me like i literally don't give a fuck like i don't know who this person like if i met tiger woods before i'd be like oh that's cool but like i wouldn't feel much like my heart rate if you were monitoring it. So it's always like Sam Hunt, like I was a big fan. Bella Hadid, I hate her. So like I'm always going to talk about the fact that she was 14 and got a DUI,
Starting point is 00:22:36 which in hindsight is fucking crazy. Who else? Justin Timber. Like, obviously I felt really strongly about before. Negatively. I'm saying either like Karen Hugar, like that was a huge loss. Yeah. So with Tiger Woods, it's hard.
Starting point is 00:22:48 When like a rando gets to. Like I'm ambivalent. Okay, but like just, just think about the crimes themselves now. Like three in. No, it's awful. And that's just the time sees crashed. many times as he drove drunk. Right.
Starting point is 00:23:03 I guess he's like out of place where like he's just legacy. Like he's the goat of golf. I know. No matter what he does in his personal life. Like that's just a fact. It's just unfortunate because like he really does have a very sorted personal life. Like member Elyn? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:23:17 Who could forget like when Tiger Woods stepped out on his wife, which is obviously crazy, but it was such a big story. It was like kind of a pop culture moment that defined our childhood. I was like, who was Elyn? It was on the cover of every fucking tabloid at the grocery store. And he was like, you know, whatever you want to do in your personal life, like, is your choice. It's not a crime to cheat on your wife. So like, I think everybody kind of moved past it, but it took a really long time.
Starting point is 00:23:38 And then he crashed his car? Yeah. And while he was getting divorced. It was like around that time, but it was after. And was there a lady in the car? Eelan, perhaps? His wife? Eelan's not the wife.
Starting point is 00:23:48 Eelan's the wife. Oh, Elyn was the wife. Uh-huh. Got it. And who was the whore? Like. I feel like it was a lookalike. Yeah, Blondini.
Starting point is 00:23:55 It was giving lookalike. Yeah. That's also scandalous. Yeah. And when someone's at the top of their game like that, like I think he's an equivalent to like Tom Brady or like LeBron James. Yeah, big Michael Jordan. Michael Jordan.
Starting point is 00:24:08 He's the Michael Jordan of golf. I guess like Michael Jordan did have like drama in his personal life, but not enough that like defined him. That could really supersede the legacy. Same with Tom Brady. Like obviously we're all talking about like Jazeel and stuff, but it's not bigger or greater than what he accomplishes a football player. Yes, but there are a lot of football players that are goaded, you know.
Starting point is 00:24:24 Really? Yeah. Like you. You can say like Peyton Manning? No, but that's a great way. to go, but he's not on Tom Brady's level. I don't think there's anybody right now. Like Joe Montana.
Starting point is 00:24:34 Okay, that's like 100 years ago. Yeah. Of this era. Like maybe, maybe when he retires, Patrick Mahomes. For sure. Yeah. Of this era. No, but there's a lot of really good, like, legendary football players, like, even in the
Starting point is 00:24:45 last 10 years, but they're not on Tom Brady's level. Madden. Who's that? John Madden. The, the video game? Who's a man? Okay, sure. I've never heard of him, so whatever.
Starting point is 00:24:57 Just saying. Like, Tiger Woods is one. of one. And I also think Michael Jordan's one of one. You're saying in golf. Tom Brady's just sort of like one in a million. Like, no, I know what you're saying. People watch golf because of Tiger Woods. Like I don't know who they were talking about before. No, they changed the sport. Yeah. And who was the next Tiger Woods? Look at us. Just like hyping him up, hyping him up after driving drunk for a third time. No, I'm sorry. Crashing for a third time. He probably drives drunk every day. And seriously, I don't believe there's an athlete worth more money than Tiger.
Starting point is 00:25:29 Woods and he wasn't stranded like you're at we're seeing florida yeah like girl call in uber he wasn't stranded so there's no excuse and the crazy thing is like i just if i'm at that level yeah who wants to drive like it's such a burden like i could be in the back seat like jamming out having a cocktail scrolling on my phone like why who doesn't have a chauffeur in this day and age well i saw this people magazine article that says why tiger woods won't hire a driver oh from an exclusive source that this current news or like was this just a random old article? No, this is current. An insider says that he doesn't want anyone to watch over him or know what he's doing.
Starting point is 00:26:07 So what the fuck is he doing? Drugs. Desire for privacy. Okay, but have you seen how Taylor drives around? Because you know her and Travis are like definitely like boating in the backseat. Have you ever seen how she drives? No. She has these huge cars, you know, her armored vehicles.
Starting point is 00:26:19 But behind the driver and the passenger seat, it's completely black curtained off. Yeah. That's for the paparazzi. So, you know, like the iconic Paris Britney show. Like they can't get that because she's. behind the curtain. Yeah, that's like the limousine back in the day had a privacy screen. Yeah, there are ways. There are ways. So maybe he's on calls, like talking shit. About who? Like Phil Mickelson? He's a private guy. So he has to drink and drive for his privacy. Oh, oh. Oh, I didn't know he was
Starting point is 00:26:49 private. Okay, it's fine. Yeah, no, because for his privacy. This is so bad. Yeah, it's really bad. like and if you're a judge in this case like you have to like you know now he has too against him Karen Huger it was like her fourth DUI now I understand being addicted to alcohol like obviously it's a vice but being addicted to like alcohol and cars together like that's not a disease yeah so I do place blame lots of it just like seriously like take a taxi for the man who's goaded one of one never to we love so much who changed the sport there'll never be another like him. And like at what point, like he hasn't ever been like canceled because he's where he is based on his own merit and skill. He's like the greatest golf player of all time. So at what
Starting point is 00:27:35 point does the PGA be like, we actually can't have you anymore? Oh, that's a good question. Is there an ethics committee? I'm not sure as of today if he's still on the PGA. Like he was like a year ago. Yeah. I don't know if he still is. But that's a really good point. He might have been injured. But like with golf, like you don't have to retire. Have you ever seen that guy, that golf player who's He's like, Ben loves. Yeah, he has like white long hair. He looks like Benjamin Franklin. He looks like a little chubby.
Starting point is 00:28:00 No, no, he looks like Benjamin Franklin. Oh. So, he's got like a white bob. Not the one with like the Diet Coke and. With the cigarettes? Yeah. Yeah. What's his name?
Starting point is 00:28:07 John. I feel like it's John. Yeah. You don't have to stop. Yes. You don't have to stop playing golf like because of your age or your physique. No, you just have to qualify for the PGA. Right.
Starting point is 00:28:18 So it's not like, you know, 40. He's got like most athletes, basketball, baseball. By the time you approach 40, you're like approaching retirement. No, but you would retire Like if you're losing and like you just want to like focus on your personal life Stop being embarrassing Yeah Yeah
Starting point is 00:28:32 I truly wish you will and I hope you get the help you need Because tisk, tisk tiger Tisk Tisk Tisk Are you ready for our next story? Brooks Nader spotted with Taryn Egerton Okay, I saw this
Starting point is 00:28:43 Isn't he gay? What? No, he just played Elton John Are you sure? Yeah When I think about like young eligible In like the heteroseean, I never think of Tarant Edgerton.
Starting point is 00:28:55 We just don't think of him. I love him. Like, he was amazing in Kingsman. And Kingsman 2. And Kingsman 3. Like, he was so good as, um. Elton John. He's in Singh, like the kid's favorite.
Starting point is 00:29:07 He's the gorilla, right? I'm still standing. Like, when we think about people who we stand. Because he does gay stuff. That's why. Yeah. Yeah. But like, yeah, I guess it's like very Hugh Jackman.
Starting point is 00:29:19 Yeah. But not even. It's just crazy for somebody. Hugh Jackman's on another level. He just like. Hugh Jackman is on another level. level in terms of his like interests and hobbies, not aligning with his sexuality. Now, I know you guys are going to be like, Tony, that's so, like, immature of you.
Starting point is 00:29:33 I got a lot of shit when I said that, like, I'm shocked that any of the male gymnasts at the Olympics were straight. But apparently it's like a very straight thing to do. And people were like, clutter, you're so binary. Like, ah, fine. I get accused of a lot of things. Fine. I am binary. Like, I think that when you're singing and dancing for a living, like, I just think
Starting point is 00:29:48 it's crazy when you're straight. It's not crazy. It's unexpected. Yeah. Yeah. It's just unexpected. Exactly. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:29:54 So I didn't know. that like I could ship Brooks Nader. Like I didn't know this was an option. So now that I do, obsessed. Really? Yeah, I feel like she goes a lot for like the obvious choice is like Tom Brady.
Starting point is 00:30:04 I'm sorry. Like I know I'm like I don't have the like it's not even an option for me for a million reasons. Like I would never date Tom Brady. It's just like so uninspiring the choice. Okay. Taran Etjerton. It's more inspiring for and I'll keep him in mind now but for someone else.
Starting point is 00:30:21 Like I still don't love him for Brooks. I feel like she could eat him for breakfast. A thousand percent. Like she just needs like more. Yeah. But she has weird taste in men. Gleb. It's true.
Starting point is 00:30:31 It's like, do you know who you are, Brooks? Like, Gleb? Yeah, but also that was like then, you know? And I do feel like things changed in the span of a year for her. Yeah. And she's just having fun. But anyways. I liked her with Kevin Costner.
Starting point is 00:30:43 The thing is, she's just so va, va, vo, vo. Whoever she's standing next to, she's automatically linked with. I don't think she was ever like flirt, like in a real way seeing Kevin Costner. No. I don't think she's seeing Taryn Andrewton. Well, they went to see a movie together. Like, a lot of people want to see movies with Brooks. No, that's a coupley.
Starting point is 00:31:02 And that's not first lady. What movie? Project Hail Mary. Oh, maybe this is like sponsored? By why? By Project Hail Mary. Like, that would be crazy. That would be a good thing for a movie to do.
Starting point is 00:31:14 I heard that the lines for Project Hail Mary, like it's bringing cinema back. I've heard the movie is amazing. We have to see it. Which makes sense because the book was amazing. Yeah. I do want to see that. Don't tell Zach. like I'll be at the movies tonight.
Starting point is 00:31:26 Like, so this is like something to be excited about. Like obviously not. What I had like thought for her. But I'll definitely keep in mind for like other girls. Yeah. I didn't know Tanya Edgerton was like on our list. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:31:42 Cute. Yeah, very cute. Are you ready for our next story? No, but I am ready for season two of Love Thighinator. Yeah. I saw something recently that makes me feel like it's coming. She posts it on her story like coming sooner than. you know but it's like okay when yeah because they haven't even like dropped a trailer because once they
Starting point is 00:31:58 they got a big trailer it's like three months from that i was living in my old apartment like that's crazy that's when i watched love thineator it wouldn't look like october right crazy yeah it was yeah i'm being jumb i moved out like the next day but still um are you ready for our third story yeah Travis kelsey signs with Tommy hillfiger as their global brand ambassador and creative collaborator wait i didn't see this and i know that he like puts his name on a lot of like garbage. So six slags. He's just like sort of like a brand whore. Yeah. He's like very brand saved general mills. Like he makes more money doing brand deals than he does football, which I love. But for some reason, I want to assume that this is like a bigger deal, not just like name slapping
Starting point is 00:32:41 because I think it's quite brilliant. Yeah, because he's the global brand ambassador and creative collaborator. That's like two, you know, mouthy titles. Yeah. He'll participate in a series of ad campaigns and a design collaboration with the Hilfiger brand. So because when it comes to like American designers, I feel like Tommy Hilfiger is always losing out to Ralflor and like they're very, very similar. And in sports, like the U.S. Open is all Ralfour and the Olympics is all Ralfour and they get like all the good sports contracts. I guess like designers haven't infiltrated football yet. And like maybe that's Tommy Hilfiger's angle. And Travis is just the person to do it because Travis is like very all American.
Starting point is 00:33:19 Midwest guy. It will be really great. Like already in the picture of him and Tommy. He's like wearing Tommy. And I just know like Tommy himself. has a voodoo doll of Ralph Lauren. And he just hates Roth Lauren so much. And Calvin Klein. Like, yes, but Calvin Klein went in like a totally different direction. When I think, I think Tommy Hilfiger and Polo. They do a very similar thing.
Starting point is 00:33:39 It's like a equestrian in Americana. Yeah. But Ralph Lauren just does it better. There's space for both of us. Yeah, but I do feel like they're just like, I'm sorry, I see Tommy Hilfiger like all the time at Nordstrom Rack. You know what I mean? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:33:51 No, I've actually been like shopped there a couple times recently. It's really cute. I got like targeted ads. They need to just be doing more. They made waves like a long time ago. I feel like that's the last time we spoke about them when they had Patrick Schwarzenegger and his model fiancee slash wife as the new faces.
Starting point is 00:34:07 And it was like a really big deal. And it like went nowhere. Yeah, but they also did Zendaya and they did Gigi. Remember Tommy X. Gigi that was everywhere. Oh, yeah. So I feel like this is kind of like a new iteration of that. But I think it makes a lot of sense and it's very exciting. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:34:21 Yeah. The campaign will break in late August, September. So spring summer joggers Look forward to it It'll be shooting at the end of April Why do we have all this information? Yeah, it's like a lot of detail It will also feature an ensemble cast of men and women
Starting point is 00:34:33 Okay The story will continue into the spring 2027 campaign along with the design collaboration That reimagines elevated Tommy icons It sounds like very promising It does, it does Because I do things like Tommy Nees to step his pussy up
Starting point is 00:34:46 Like could be, we'll wait to see the product Could be Toasty Lions Could be Toasty Lions I'm not hopeful But it could of course Yeah I just feel like I'm only ever talking about Tommy Hilfiger in regards to Chris Jenner. Because she always goes to the mechalla with them because they're like best friends and he needs a guest and she needs a table.
Starting point is 00:35:03 Right. So like the next time he has a dinner party like Travis will be invited and Chris will be invited. And then she could say what if you just call Taylor up? Because Chris is just a businesswoman, right? Like she understands and Travis is very business savvy. I actually could see the two of them getting along. And Travis is friends with Corey. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:35:22 There are a couple like, but it's never going to happen. Did you see? I can actually see like Taylor being spotted with Chris. Right. But never forgiving Kim. So the entire like A-List community went to the Paul McCartney concert. Did you see? No.
Starting point is 00:35:36 Oh my God. And like one photographer knew it was happening. And he had a really blurry camera from really far away and he got all these blurry ass pictures of the back door. Everyone was there. Role model and Dakota Johnson together. Taylor was there. Olivia Rodriguez was there. Oh, I saw that.
Starting point is 00:35:52 So there's this very blurry picture of like a group of people standing out. outside the back door, like waiting for their cars. And it looks like they're in the same group of people, but I actually think it's like depth perception. And she's talking to someone and she's talking to someone. I don't think that they interacted at all because that's the one picture we have of Taylor and Olivia. And we know those two bitches hate each other. Like, I'm telling you, they didn't talk. Tate McCray was there with Jake Shane. And a lot of people were like, mystery man. I'm like, it's Jake Shane. Like, you would, I recognize that physique anywhere. John Mayer was there solo. It was like literally the most of it. Everyone went. I didn't know
Starting point is 00:36:23 like we were like I guess he is a beetle like and it's a really big deal especially if you're like into music. He's like the tiger woods of music. I guess. Yeah. To me, I think the best song he ever did was four or five seconds with Rihanna. Like I think it kind of shits on anything the Beatles ever released. Hot take.
Starting point is 00:36:41 So I would have went to hear that but I don't think he performed it. No. I don't think. And like I just know that that one photographer who knew that this event was happening is seriously going to feed his family for three years because he must have sold those pictures for so much money and nobody else, you know, he had no competition. Yeah. I would suggest he takes his earnings and buys a new camera. Oh.
Starting point is 00:37:01 Well, maybe he will. Maybe he will. Maybe next year you'll get better picks. Yeah. Are you ready for our fourth story? I think we're just like zooming through. We are. I mean, the stories aren't like that meaty.
Starting point is 00:37:13 But we are. So meaty. I don't think that Joe McHale like knew, like understands actually the impact of that soundbite. I feel like he does. Chat stew. What does that even mean? And he would show like a big pot. It was called the soup.
Starting point is 00:37:30 It was called the soup. So right. Okay. So he was making a stew of like all the, it was about like late night hosts, right? Chat stew. So meaty. Like that's up there with like Andy Cohen's
Starting point is 00:37:40 Watchtrap and Live theme song. Like 1,000 or so meaty. Yeah. Good stuff. I feel like that show was underappreciated. I think so too. But then it became appreciated and they tried to bring it back. and they just like it's over.
Starting point is 00:37:53 Yeah. But that was like the good years for E. Amongst. Chelsea lately. Yeah. Like they had shows that people watched. Yeah, but there was like two different good years because there was like that one. And then there was like Fashion Police.
Starting point is 00:38:04 Fashion Police Kardashians. Oh, that. Yeah. So the soup, Chelsea Handler, like very early. Ran so that, yeah, Kardashians, fashion police, it was the golden years of E. Yeah. Rich kids. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:38:20 Are you ready for our next story? Four masked men stole over $10 million worth of art. Red War. I thought this was masked singer news. Was Queen Corgi there? No. So Renoir, Matisse, and Cizan paintings worth over $10 million were stolen in a three-minute heist in Italy.
Starting point is 00:38:37 Oh, my God. Art heist. Where, which museum? Like, was it? It was at the Magnani Rocka Foundation Villa, located in Parma. And they also, there was recently a heist at the Louvre, right? Yes. Well, that was the big one.
Starting point is 00:38:52 Do we think that these are connected? I don't know. But if they are and they are able to get intel on this one that could lead them back, because whatever happened with the loop, they found like some people, but they never found what was missing, right? Right. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:39:07 Well, like sending love to the Cézanne family. Yeah. It happened in three minutes. You know what? That's pretty impressive. Like, I just feel like with art, like it's so high security that if you can't steal it, like, you almost deserve it. Like, do you know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:39:24 Even though, like, the Louvre was, like, when they found out how the guys got in, it was, like, the least high secure place. Like, that's where the Mona Lisa is housed and, like, some morons of the ladder can steal. No, and there's so much history of people, like, stealing the art. Like, do better security. Yeah. But, like, that's how I felt when I was watching Ocean's Sandra Bullock. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:39:41 Like, they really put their whole... But I actually felt like they had a lot of security at Ocean's Sandra Bullock. That's what I mean. So if you're able to successfully steal that necklace, like... You worked for it. You deserve it. Yeah. Well, hopefully they find the pieces.
Starting point is 00:39:58 Such a shame. Did they ever find what they stole from the Louvre? No, I don't think so. That was such a crazy story. I feel like everyone was talking about the Louv for like 48 hours. Yeah, and like everyone was on the side of the thieves. Were they? I felt like, yeah.
Starting point is 00:40:08 No, I don't feel that. Really? No, yeah, I don't. No, people were like. Well, yeah. Let's like Luigi Mangione. Well, that's on a different level. On a different level.
Starting point is 00:40:17 On a different life. Yeah, but I don't remember. remember like the vibes being pro. I feel like the vibes were like very jokey. It was like the modern suez. Well, yes, jokey for sure. But I think ultimately like we all sort of agreed. Maybe like we all agree.
Starting point is 00:40:31 But I do think that people out there were like, go get that Josephine tiara. I'm just like a preservationist, you know. Of history. Yeah. And her history. I cuss a little. I'm a preservation of history for sure. As am I, but not everyone wants to preserve history and history.
Starting point is 00:40:49 What can we say? Makes me sick. Makes me fucking sick. Sickening. Yeah, it's actually, it makes me emotional for sure. Let me also just. Should we take like a blow break? This is how you know it's time for me to go home.
Starting point is 00:41:08 I bought this box of tissues when I first, like, got to the studio because I'm like, my nose only runs during the toast. I have about three left. Sad. I think we should take a blow break. Will you mute us so we can blow? We can just cut this out. I'm getting a little nasally.
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Starting point is 00:45:01 turt I'm like not no what's new with you well I've been sick and I can't really suss out if it's allergies or also sickness I think it's both because my like usually in the morning when I wake up my allergies aren't so bad I haven't been outside 12 hours but I feel my worst in the mornings. And I've been like taking Zyrtex sparingly because it'll drain my supply. But like, mom's got to get up and mama's got to work. So I took a Zyrtec this morning. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:45:30 Okay. We're talking about ZerTech. I'm ready for the final. You know ZerTech is a trigger word for me. Yeah. And so if I... And over the weekend, Ben was like hounding you about your Zirtec consumption. He's so fucking patronizing.
Starting point is 00:45:38 After like making me take a Zirtec and then telling me like my brain is hot. Yeah. He's like, how do you feel? Like, yeah. I can't stand him. Um, so yeah, if I have brain fog today, like, blimp. That's why. Blame the Zyrtec.
Starting point is 00:45:49 Yeah. Our fifth and final story. It's a crazy story. Did you see this? The teeth? Miss Tile and contestant's teeth falling out during the pageant. So I saw this a couple of days ago. And then yesterday I'm laying in bed and Ben is on his phone.
Starting point is 00:46:01 He goes, and I was like, oh my God, what? Like it was a really bad gas. I was like, okay, so somebody died. Breaking news that I haven't seen yet. Like, you know, assassination, you know, like something crazy. Did you see Miss Venezuela or whatever with her teeth fell out? I'm like, not only are you so drama for no reason. But yes, I saw that.
Starting point is 00:46:18 three days ago. Like, fuck off. Yeah. It's viral video. So a Miss Grand Thailand contestant is giving new meaning to dental crowns. That's funny. So she stunned spectators when her veneers fell out mid-sfeet during the pageants preliminary round on March 25th. It wasn't veneers, right? It looked like dentures. Because veneers can fall out. Well, they can one at a time, not like a whole set. Not a set, not a wrap. So I think in pageants, I know with little kids, like John Bonnet types of pageants they wear, I think they're called like fishers, fishlets. And it's like a set of like four
Starting point is 00:46:47 fake teeth that you just like pop in front. It's very common in pageantry. Or she's like hardcore wearing dentures. I think she's wearing dentures like for the pageant, like a little kid, but she's 18. So it wasn't like that. But like, yeah, don't get your teeth done. I agree. And when she, when they fell out, she had a full set of teeth. Like it wasn't like she actually had nubs like dentures.
Starting point is 00:47:08 But she was wearing fake teeth for the pageant. Great. But like you don't have to like go and get veneers for this. It's actually the timing is insane. Like the moment she's. crown. Like she's no longer in the competition. The competition is over. Her teeth give out. Like, what are the odds? Yeah. Because if it had given out 10 minutes before during the swimsuit like, she would have lost. But also then she like sashayed the day away. Like she didn't miss a beat
Starting point is 00:47:31 back in. She turned, pop them back in. Yeah. It was a true example of like true pageantry. Yeah. She deserved that crown. And now we're speaking about her on a global level. Yeah. Like what was the past? What was the competition? Miss Grand Thailand. So she'll compete in like Miss Universe? I guess so that she would be Miss Thailand. But you know, there's a million pageants. I wish that like the big pageants.
Starting point is 00:47:54 They've skilled shots of like the moment that fell out. Like seriously leave her alone. I wish when I talk about like big televised events like I wish pageants like Miss Universe or Miss America were like more. It's very niche pageants. I don't even know if they're televised. And if they are, it's not like a major.
Starting point is 00:48:08 But I feel like it would be so fun. I remember Kelly Clarkson launched that like singing competition? Like Eurovision. Yeah. Eurovision for America. Like, that should have taken off. Yeah. We need more like national competitions on a global scale.
Starting point is 00:48:23 Oh, so the grand finale will take place. It took place yesterday with the winner moving on to represent the country and Miss Grand International Pagion in India this October. So I don't know if she won that. Oh, maybe it was the teeth. No, but I think like it's her superpower now. You know what I mean? Yeah, and they all have causes. Maybe hers could be like, there are a lot of organizations that do like mouth, like cleft lip pallets in third world countries.
Starting point is 00:48:46 like teeth, dental work for underprivileged. Homeless, not toothless. Homeless. No, but I was thinking more like how Alex Earl, if you told her growing up, like her act was going to be the thing that set her apart and was going to launch her to super a stardom, you would have never guessed. And same with this girl's teeth. She's probably been insecure about them, hence the veneers.
Starting point is 00:49:03 And now it's like the thing that everyone's talking about you for and commending you for your grace. Grace under pressure. Do you think that she should moving forward, like be a pageant girl with buck teeth, like not conform to society's beauty standards for women? So while I think that like we all who consumed this secondhand like appreciated the authenticity, I feel like the judge is the pageant that she was in. Like they're like, oh, hell no.
Starting point is 00:49:26 Right. You're out. Like there's the reason she felt the need to wear them. Yeah. They're not craving like authenticity and vulnerability. Yeah. Yeah. Did I ever tell you about the time like I almost did miss like to New York?
Starting point is 00:49:43 I mean, I was there with you as your sister. Yeah. I don't know if I've told this story. but like actually a friend of mine did a Miss Teen, maybe was it New York something. We all went to the competition. It was in Connecticut. She didn't really make it really far, but like it was fun, whatever.
Starting point is 00:49:56 And then I was like, you know what? Yeah, let's do it. I had this amazing phone interview. I remember I was like standing on the street. I must have been like 11th grade. And I gave like probably one of the most dazzling phone interview performances like that anybody's ever done. And I was like, I know I'll be getting a call. And I did.
Starting point is 00:50:10 And then I was like sort of setting in that I would have to do swimsuit competition. And so the idea, like I was never serious about doing it, you know? Yeah. But my life could have been totally different. A lot of people get their starts in pageantry. Shannon Ford. I don't think your life would have been different, actually. Like, you would have wound up being an influencer podcaster who has to start in pageantry,
Starting point is 00:50:27 like all other influencer podcasts. It may have just been like one of my funny stories, you know? Yeah. How I almost try to. Kind of a theme of like my young adult life is like almost doing things. I almost tried out for X Factor. I almost got in the police car during the bank robbery. I almost became Misty, New York.
Starting point is 00:50:43 I wonder like you almost won't that. Yeah. At least you did that one. Sort of. Oh, and the other one you almost did. Can I say what you almost did? What? I never almost did it. I've told that story. I was literally asked to do special forces and I said no. Like, I was pregnant too. But like even if I wasn't, I was never doing that. I feel like you said recently, like, if you weren't pregnant, like you would have done special forces.
Starting point is 00:51:06 I probably would have felt like I had to. Like, when you get asked with Messinger, like I felt like I had to. But I understand why you feel like you had to do Messinger. You have an amazing voice. Yeah, of course. And I was not pregnant anymore. And I was like, I'm back with special. Special forces, pregnant or not pregnant, I do believe, like, I was, like, I'm just limited. Yeah. So I said no, because I was pregnant. And honestly, thank fucking God.
Starting point is 00:51:23 Like, I would have been like Britney Cartwright. I would have set myself home the first day. You would have hated it. Even though when they asked me, like, maybe, like, I think about, 5K, like, no, no. Before I got pregnant, I was working out every day. Like, I was kind of crushing. It's different. The physical is on another level, of course.
Starting point is 00:51:39 But you were actually, like, pretty prepared for a physical. You like, the mental, emotional. And there's one toilet. And there's, like, torture. And, like, you are like, in, like. And you just like open up. about stuff girl get out like I saw clips of brown and chicken fight talking about her like abusive relationship I would have to talk about like my trauma so you see that's not nobody's business
Starting point is 00:51:55 for what for television for a show nobody watches by the way mind you no people watch it but it's like they don't okay you just like let it all out there like for like for traders like it's I think a lot of it is really embarrassing like the physical challenges the doing your own makeup the looking like a rat for 24 hours like but it's her traders like there's a huge payoff no you don't have to open up for traders No, you don't. I think it helps if you do. Maybe you could get like one more round. Sympathy vote. Yeah. But like, are you so desperate? You'll tell the whole world your life story to stay on a TV
Starting point is 00:52:26 show for one more day? No, that's what I'm like, no. But it may be if it's like a really big TV show, I get it. For one more day? One more week? One more day for you week for viewer kind. Yeah, it's one more. You get paid per episode. So like maybe you just really need the money. So you'll tell your whole life story. Yeah. And if you want to hear my life story, I literally wrote a book. Oh, you know what? The Girlwood in the job, The Crazy Beautiful Life of an Instagram Thirst Monster. It was a New York Times bestseller.
Starting point is 00:52:48 A lot of people don't know that I read it, because it was kind of a long time ago now, perhaps time for a sequel. People say it's amazing. And it's nice and short. It was like 240 pages. Speaking of, people thought there was camper and counselor erasure here because they hadn't seen it on the shelves. But it's just higher up. There's never been Camper counselor arraiser. No.
Starting point is 00:53:04 The best book ever written. It's up there with like giraffes can't dance and brown bear. And like cat in the hat. Like seriously? I need Ruby to like expand his like literary interest because I can't fucking read that brown bear anymore. It'll go. And then you'll be like, oh, my gosh, how did we ever stop reading that? Brown bear, brown bear.
Starting point is 00:53:20 What do you? And I go like crazy reading it because it's repetitive. And so you have to like, I don't know what's exciting about it for him. Like, I don't understand. So obviously I've been adding, do you want to hear my current rendition of brown bear? I'm actually really good. We add the sounds in. Round bear, round bear.
Starting point is 00:53:36 What do you see? Rar. I see a red bird looking at me. Red bird, red bird. What do you see? cacao, cacao! I see it,
Starting point is 00:53:47 and you're getting like the vibe. Like, I've been adding in the sounds. Oh, when they're asked the question, that's how they respond. And then you translate. And then when they say, teacher, teacher, what does the teacher say? This is what I say.
Starting point is 00:53:59 I say, Ruben Geller-Rashre Saffer, you go to the principal's office right now for being the cutest darn kid in this entire school. He loves that part. Children, children. What do you see?
Starting point is 00:54:15 And then instead of repeating back Like what animals I say we see a rar Caca Quack Oh wow So we don't really have the association And then I go Rubikala Rush and Sauer
Starting point is 00:54:24 You were the kid to see I'm giving this entire Dynne school system Go to the prison office right now Looking at us I go I've gone crazy You have to expand it Otherwise you're reading the same thing
Starting point is 00:54:33 Over and over again Like you have to add Maybe the problem is I'm making it so interesting You have to make it so meaty Correct I'll leave me with that Ground Bear Steal So, amazing.
Starting point is 00:54:47 That's our show. A Nassafi. And you know what? It's fine. And Nassafi, like a sick one for you. A nice sick one for you. I hope you guys have an amazing day. We'll see you tomorrow.
Starting point is 00:54:56 Thank you so much for listening to the Toast and Lenny. Morning, show we deal with the fast ice, I'm interested in YouTube. Please subscribe to the video and thumbs up. We're also available. Podcasts, Mark, podcast, we found, on Spotify, do, it's your public video. It's all.
Starting point is 00:55:04 Please, my guys, find out of the toast. We've got to be able to send out. Wickedly talented we are. Yeah. Love you. Bye.

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