The Trillionaire Mindset - 21: Ben Got Owned by Pumpers

Episode Date: February 18, 2022

WE. LOVE. PUMPING. This week Ben and Emil start their first internet beef, joke about Ben getting owned on Twitter, and discuss the future of self-driving cars. Listen on Apple Podcasts: http://apple.co/trillionaire Go to https://nordvpn.com/trill or use the code trill to get up to 70% off your NordVPN Plan + 1 additional month for free. It’s completely risk free with NordVPN's 30 day money-back guarantee! All you have to do is download the Current app at https://current.com/trill or enter our code TRILL during sign up for a chance to win! No purchase is necessary to win, purchase won’t increase chances of winning. Void where prohibited, eligibility restrictions apply. Visit https://current.com/trill for full Terms and Conditions. Make sure you go to https://Public.com/TRILL to get a free stock *This is not investment advice. Offer valid for U.S. residents 18+ and subject to account approval. See https://Public.com/disclosures/  Trillionaire IG: https://www.instagram.com/trillionairepod/ Trillionaire Twitter: https://twitter.com/trillionairepod TMG Studios YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/tinymeatgang TMG Studios IG: https://www.instagram.com/realtmgstudios/ TMG Studios Twitter: https://twitter.com/realtmgstudios BEN https://www.instagram.com/bencahn/ https://twitter.com/Buncahn EMIL https://www.instagram.com/emilderosa/ https://twitter.com/emilderosa  *DISCLOSURE: THE OPINIONS EXPRESSED IN THIS VIDEO ARE SOLELY THOSE OF THE PARTICIPANTS INVOLVED. THESE OPINIONS DO NOT REFLECT THE OPINIONS OF ANYONE ELSE. THIS IS NOT INVESTMENT ADVICE. THE VIEWER OF THE VIDEO IS RESPONSIBLE FOR CONSIDERING ANY INFORMATION CAREFULLY AND MAKING THEIR OWN DECISIONS TO BUY OR SELL OR HOLD ANY INVESTMENT. SOME OF THE CONTENT OF THIS VIDEO IS CONSIDERED TO BE SATIRE AND MAY NOT BE CONSIDERED FACTUAL AND SHOULD BE TAKEN IN SUCH LIGHT. THE COMMENTS MADE IN THIS VIDEO ARE FOR ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY AND ARE NOT MEANT TO BE TAKEN LITERALLY.*

in situations like this where everyone is prepared for the market to drop, everyone is hedged, everyone thinks that they're being smart and everyone is like, yeah, the market's definitely going to drop. I got news for you. Stop imagining my head getting popped by Marjorie Taylor Green's thighs because I look over you and you're giggling. Basically, I'm just not going to look at him. But when everybody is preparing for an event, it makes it all the less likely that that event will cause the thing that everyone is assuming will happen. Because everyone is insured, you know, and that goes to the market likes to fuck the majority of people, the majority of the time. He is crying

He's crying. He's delirious. When we were doing the ad reads before the show this man was just like Laughing at nothing. He's doing it. Hey guys, we got a crew at I'm gonna be a little bit late. I'm gonna be a little late. I'm gonna be a little late. I'm gonna be a little late. Apple shares are just getting hammered this morning. Every day they're pounding it. I'm not fucking late.

I'm not fucking late. I'm not fucking late. I'm not fucking late. I'm not fucking late. I'm not fucking late. I'm not fucking late. I was in the bathroom. What were you thinking? We got liquid death, right?

Okay. So I was like, what other joke products could we come up with? Not that we invented liquid death because we didn't, but... Solid life. No, no, no, dude. No, no, no dude. No, no, no, no, not at all. Not at all. I was thinking like, come and it's milk.

Ew. Yeah, can you imagine seeing that in the milk aisle? Come? In the dairy case, come. But like, I feel like you would have to be more clever than just come. Okay, dog shit chocolate. It was my other one.

Yeah, that one works. Dog shit. I would eat dog shit. was my other one. Yeah, that one works dog shit. I would eat dog shit And it was chocolate. Yeah, we need the chocolate. Yeah, dog shit Connors to Weird honestly if you're drinking milk already Well, it would be like kind of gross. It would be almond milk You ever see those adults who just like gulp down a glass of milk? Yeah, you know, you remember the milk ads got milk?

Yeah, it's all like a fucking... It's big milk. It legitimately is. Big dairy farmers association or whatever. It's funny because we were just talking about the story of the, you know, the big cave with like the 1.4 billion pounds of cheese. The big cave with one of my five billion pounds of cheese. Can you talk about it?

We all have to do like an episode about it. Can you give me a quick rundown on the big cave? I don't even know what one for a billion pounds of cheese in it. Basically what happened. Lower your chair. I don't even remember what happened. It was like they had... They had too much fucking government subsidized cheese.

And to control the prices, they had to... Or no, they had too much milk, they had to turn it into cheese. They had to just shove it in a big fucking cave underground. I'll send you the article. Weird. When did the government do that? 1776? Oh, no, no, no. I'm gonna say, whoa. Huh. I don't know.

I love cheese, but I can't eat it anymore as I get older. My stomach's like, no, no, we're going to turn this into farts instead. Are you lactose intolerant? Yeah. We all kind of we all are. Yeah, that's the thing. But those got milk ads used to gross me out when I was a kid. Milk is fucking gross. But the specifically the like the milk must action shit. I didn't know what come was when I was that age, buddy. Like I didn't understand the American pie joke. What was the joke? Or, or rather there's something about Mary

where he's got the cum. Oh, I didn't get it at all. What is that? I didn't get it at all. And I also thought that okay, when I then learned what come was, I'm like, so when you jerk off, there's a real risk that you don't know where it ends up.

Like it just shoots out and you're like, where did it go? God damn, the naivete, the naïve, the Yeah, the fairly brothers were really taking liberties. Yeah, but those got, I don't know if you remember the got milk print ads. They were like super high resolution obviously because they're print ads and the commas just glistened on there. Yeah, there was one of Stephen Tyler from a hero's Smith. And he's got his mouth wide open. You just see his disgusting fucking mouth and he's got a milk mustache. It's just so gross. Everyone did it. Ugh.

Nowadays, no, no, sir, not for me. I wouldn't do that. I've got my computer open here because I have some trades on. How much, how much would it take for you to do a got milk ad? Oh, I would do it for $100. I would do it. Okay. Cause it does. I mean, it's got calcium a hundred dollars. I would do it. Okay.

Cause it does, I mean, it's got calcium, right? There's always a price. Yeah, I would do it for that much. Yeah. I, I, buddy, I could talk about milk so much more right now, but I don't think anyone else is here at it. Cause I got, I got questions. Why does it go from one percent to two percent to full?

It's fat. How come there's no 50%? Oh my God. Explain it to me. I don't know, I don't care. Yeah, well, I care. Jeez. Anyway, hey everybody, you're going to want to go ahead and click, read more in the description

box so you can access the disclaimer if you want to read it. Also, Emil has COVID. He tested positive for COVID. And guess who didn't get it? I'm pointing to the guy who didn't get it, and that's me. First off, you're not allowed to just tell everyone I have COVID. That's a violation of my hippo rights. Well, I ain't a hippo, so I could do whatever I want.

You can't ask for my... Your records? You can't ask for my... Your records? You can't ask for my records? Yeah, well, I just outed you. What are you gonna sue me? The cost of a lawyer would. It's true. It happened and I...

But it was one of those flimsy at home tests. It was probably a fluke. No, because you actually are sick. You're very sick. And you sound sick. But not now. I mean, now I'm in the like... No, because you actually are sick. And you sound sick. But not now. I mean, now I'm in the like, yeah, you're in the recovery.

I had two days of like, writhing and pain. And you were, yeah, you were in a bad spot. Yeah. But now look at you. And we actually hopped on a Zoom call during, because I was like, I'm gonna work through this. Yeah.

And after this happened, I canceled canceled every call I had and stuff. But yeah, I saw you going like this clutching your chest and you were like, I gotta just, I gotta sit down. I was like, okay, bye dude, I'll talk to you later. And I hopped on and you just went, whoa, your lips are so white. You looked like shit. I did. But now you look good.

And we're safely distanced. And frankly, I think that my immune system is probably Something tempting fake. Yeah, but you know, but also I did my I did my isolation period that Fauci told me to do and Now look at you now look at me and we're both wearing blue. We're both as your brain. Do you have brain fog? I guess a little I feel stupid. Okay, And I think that's the worst part right now. Welcome to what it's like to be me. I think I'm worried about what will linger. Like I was with my friend a couple weeks ago

and he was coughing and I was like, dude, what the fuck? Yeah. And he was like, I had COVID like two months ago and he said the cough just hasn't gone away. And I'm like, well, I don't want to fucking cough for two months. I don't want the brain fog thing. Yep.

I wonder how much of a psychosomatic though at this point I don't want a fucking call for two months. Yeah, I don't want the brain fog thing. Yep. I wonder how much of it is psychosomatic though at this point, because it's just been in our heads for so fucking long. Right. You know? But I'm not worried about you, you're a healthy guy. And I'm as much as I don't want it, I'm trying just not to worry about it.

I'm like, all right, you know what? I'm just gonna roll with the punches. And if I get it, then I'll treat it accordingly.. I feel like I got it at the worst time too, because like now we're at the end of Omicron. Getting it at the beginning, great, right? Because then you just live your life and you're not worried about it. I was worried about Omicron the whole time. You know, we're getting out of it. I got it. And now I'll have no immunity to the next variant. I hope your dumb body doesn't decide to mutate it for it and ruin it for everyone else.

You think I'm gonna be the main... I hope that your dumb body doesn't say... Mine's no guys, we gotta create a new one. Check it out and who does it. Yeah, why not? It's gotta be someone, right? I don't think it's gonna be me. Isn't it crazy that the thing that's coursing through

your body right now has been in the body of so many other millions of people. Isn't that gross, Emil? It is crazy. Isn't that gross? The doctor did say he's never seen someone take such a big viral load. That's a cone joke. Wait, did you talk to a doctor at all? No, come on. Can you like not face me though? Can you just kind of... Sure. Okay.

The doctor said, serious. I'm like, maybe we shouldn't be, even though we're distanced enough. I'm like, you know, I'm not gonna take any chance. We didn't drive here together, did I hear what? Did you hear the thing about how, you know, loud talkers and men specifically spread the virus more? Because they're

But they had to take it back because it was racist towards Italians or something No, but I did hear that people who wear glasses have have a slightly reduced risk because the glasses act as a barrier Well, you can get it through your eyes. I guess yeah guess, yeah, it's a mucus membrane, right? But people with nasty dirt stashes are also high risk. Are you talking about me with my nasty dirt stash? Just anyone. Leave a comment if you like my nasty dirt stash or just let us know. Also, be sure to like this video and subscribe

and leave nice comments. Just to get that out of the way. Oh yeah, follow us on socials. Follow us on socials. Follow us on socials, yeah. What are we getting into today? God damn, we covered, come, we covered. You're gonna have to put me on your back on this one.

No, no, it's okay. I don't mind. I got the brain fog, baby. Did you see that I got absolutely owned or fired? I did. This was, I was, I got nothing to do and I'm scrolling and I'm I see it happening and I'm going what the fuck has been there Yeah, I got I got it's annoying because a lot of my Twitter followers Followed me because of the succession videos that I made and they don't care about stocks and stuff

So when I tweet about stocks like nobody cares nobody likes them nobody retweets them and I'm always like God damn maybe I need to create a new account. But also, I don't give a shit, I tweet about whatever you want. Yeah, but there is this guy, first of all, shout out to Melvin Capital guy, not the actual Melvin capital for all you game stoppers out there. This is just this guy's alias, and I asked him what his name is, and he just said, just call me by my Twitter name,

because he defended me in this Twitter beef, but it's really I really don't give a shit I there's a pumper of We talked about him before yeah, we talked about him briefly He he goes by mr. Zach Morris, which is obviously not his real name because Zach Morris is the fictional character unsaved by the bell This guy's got over half a million Twitter followers and he's just a shameless, unrelenting pumper. Like, he doesn't even hide it. He tweets shit like, I love pumping,

which is I'm pretty sure that that would be, that would get you in trouble with the SEC to like blatantly call it out. He had that video that literally was, I love pumping. And it's like, I think it's him, you know, flipping the bird to people yelling, calling him a pumper. Interesting. And it's like, he's like, I love pumping.

And he's, there was like his cars and his fucking house. And whatever the fuck he had blocked me before. And I guess at some point he unblocked me because I called him out because straight up I You know, I'm not naive. I'm not an idiot But I know that if if a good pumper is able to Actually make a stock go who might it to Care about the stock if I'm gonna participate. I'm gonna participate. Why not like hey if it's gonna go up I'm gonna get on that train.

And I thought that this guy, hey, maybe he's a good pumper. There are no good pumpers. When I say good, I don't mean morally. I mean, can he move a stock? And yeah, I lost money on, I lost like a thousand bucks on one of his play. Well, kind of stuff is he pumping, though. Garbage companies, low priced stocks. There was one wish. But not, not like penny stocks, right?

Either, well, no, but like penny stock is anything under five bucks technically. So, a dollar, I can't remember, but either way, he's, he's pumping low priced shit companies that, He's pumping low priced shit companies that can only move when someone like him steps in. And I don't know if he gets paid by these companies. I don't know if there's a promoter out there who's paying him, I have no idea. I just know, I believe he made a ton of money on AMC. Lucky, just got lucky, made like-

All these guys had one lucky move. I know. He, I think he made a ton of money on AMC and then started marketing himself as like the guy who's plays you gotta follow. And of course, 100, tens of thousands of young white guys who are like, damn, I gotta, I want to make money to like this guy. He lives it up in Florida. He drive a nice car.

He drink alcohol. He party. What's his next play? It's like, don't fucking do that. You dorks. That's the first class ticket to loserville. You're gonna lose line first class. Yeah, man. I would rather play first class on loser. If I'm going to lose a Bill, stick me in the front. Amen to that, brother. Amen. I'll drink some, I'll drink some come milk to that. But he blocked me and I remember at the time,

he never posted photos of himself. He would be in groups of like his, with his little followers, his little cronies, who were all legitimately like 19, 20 year old kids, but he always had his face blurred out. Like he, he tried to protect his identity. And so the other day, I realized, oh, he unblocked me. And I tweeted him saying, like, oh, you're gonna like, this guy won't even, hey, come on my podcast and like defend yourself or something like that. And I said, oh, who am I, something like, oh, you're gonna like, this guy won't even, hey, come on my podcast and like defend yourself or something like that.

And I said, who am I, something like, oh, who am I kidding? He's not gonna come on the show. He's like, you won't even show what he, yeah, that's more. That's more scared to even post his face. He didn't say, come on my podcast. He said, come on my podcast, bitch.

Yeah, that's what I said. And then I said, he's too scared to even post his face or his name. So I doubt he'd have the stones to go on my show. And I'm obviously just being a shit, but all his dumb little followers were like, what are you talking about? He posts his face. And I didn't want to bother being like, he didn't a year ago, so I don't fucking know. But he, he, he, he, he replied with a photo of himself shirtless,

wearing a chain flipping off the camera and he said, I've been doxed enough Ben showed. He called me Ben showed, which hurt. That does hurt. Where is he? He's in like a public bathroom. I don't know. Yeah, he's in a bathroom with just a sink and there's a automatic paper towel dispenser. I got in trouble on one of the shows for commenting on men's body. So I'm not allowed to say anything about his body. Well, he looks fucking ripped. He looks like he could kick my ass and he's probably like six foot five at least. But he called me a chode. He owned me by posting a photo of himself because I mean, he's super hot.

And then I said something like, oh yeah, I said, you guys, if you're listening, you gotta go to YouTube and see to see what he looks like. You said, anyway, man, you're the worst prompt or I've ever seen in my 14 plus years of trading. If you wanna come on the show to defend yourself by all means, yeah, it would mean views for us. Don't need it.

I don't give a shit either way. And he just wrote, thank you, baby, with a picture of his Rolls Royce. Do we know that that's his? It's just a picture of a Rolls Royce. It's his. I trust this guy. Yeah, I do trust him.

It's a Rolls Royce. Buddy, how much is that a Bentley? No, it's a Rolls Royce. You make, I would never buy a Rolls Royce unless I had a hundred million dollars. The, the, the, if I fucking leases it, probably, but even then,

the insurance on that has gotta be a thousand dollars a month. Ugh. Listen to those sniffles, listen to you. You got to, that's part of the game. You gotta let your followers know that you're flexing. That's what's so annoying. I would trust a guy who's making a ton of money trading, but drives, for example, a 1989 Volvo. You okay? No one's specific.

No one's specific. Also has to wear glasses. Speaking of which, fuck, I mean, I started the day up 6 grand and now I'm down 1500. Ugh, this is annoying. This is why you don't try to buy the dip on certain things, folks. I'm about to get stopped out on Shopify. Just let it happen. Just get it there. Just stop me out.

You fucking piece of shit. Stupid fucking dumb. Okay. Anyway, I'm up on the month. The reason why I'm upset is because I wanted to finish this week out with a bang so that I could take next week off because I'd never take time off. And I'm like, I want to go to the beach. I want to surf.

I haven't done that in a long time. And looks like I'm going to polish it off with, you know, a little bit of a loss. But who gives a crap? Because I'm still alive and I don't have COVID, right? Okay. Wait, wait, you gotta, wait, so one last thing, this guy I think Zach Morris is about to be investigating. Wait, can I tell you the most, can I tell them the most embarrassing thing?

Yes. So the actor who played Zach Morris on, saved by the bell, his name was Mark Paul Gosselar. Right. And so some guy starts replying to Ben and his, like, not his Twitter handle, but his username on there was Mark Ball Gosselar and he had a picture of Mark Ball Gosselar. And so I'm just like riding out the COVID like watching as it happens and I'm going holy, Ben. The real actor is revlying to you and he's talking about how he was getting trade tips from Mr. Zach Morris in a chat.

Yeah. And I was like, this is crazy. Mark Paul Gosselar is in Mr. Zach Morris' trading chats and then you were like, buddy, click the account and it was just some like 20 hand old fucking idiot. Yeah, he was basically nobody. You got fooled, but you and everyone else, but I think I suspect that this Zach Morris is about to be investigated or indicted or something because he was tweeting about how he's pissed off and is like, I'm quitting, I'm quitting Twitter.

And then he posted a video after our little back and forth. He posted a video, let's pull it up here of him. Here it is. Cheers everyone and goodbye. I'm gonna keep in contact with my, you know, you close homies on here and that's about it. I'm fucking tired of all this fucking bullshit. Every time I look at Twitter,

everybody's fucking fighting each other. You guys don't wanna make money anymore. Just wanna about it. I'm fucking tired of all this fucking bullshit. I mean, I look up Twitter. Everybody's fucking fighting each other You guys don't want to make money for it. Just want to fucking Swing your little dick surround. So good luck and all you people that I help you know Where you're following and everything and then you go against me and you go against my group you guys you go fuck yourself to take care Good luck. Damn dude. Okay. Jesus. Some way. Yeah, as hand yeah, it's just a POV of his dumb little meat popsicle fingers holding a plastic cup of some kind of alcohol. His hand is totally shaky. I think the walls are closing.

I hope the walls are closing, because I think this guy sucks ass in his abyss of shit. Also, Ben, I gotta ask you, I saw this tweet. Are you a narc? Am I a narc? Yeah. If you damn right, I'm a narc. For people like this, I gotta ask you, I saw this tweet. Are you in ARC? Am I in ARC? Yeah, you damn right, I'm in ARC. For people like this, I'll in ARC out of anybody. So he said wow, Mr. Zach Morris was posting things to private group before posting them to his half million followers

on Twitter, laugh aloud, CC, SEC enforcement. Yeah, I'm not above, I'm not above. You're not above writing people out? To the SEC? Who are you? Who me? Yeah. You know me.

Well, where's the consistency here, man? This guy sucks. I don't care. Also, the SEC, it's probably some 20 year old run in their account. Right. They probably just, they probably only run it during Pride Month and just post like rainbow flags and stuff. Yeah, just like the CIA. Yeah.

The CIA, we support, um, did I get stopped out? How come my stops not working? Did I hang on? Sorry, I need to make sure, I did. You mother fuck. Well, cool. I love to lose $1,200 on Shopify when being up 600 on that one earlier. How about a little Vlad D brief, man?

Boy, it feels good to know. Oh, I guess we should talk about it because it was last week. It feels like a month ago, doesn't it? It does. It's weird. Drugs will do that to you. I feel.

Also, I didn't know how it was gonna go, but people really had a reaction to it. Yeah. Which is great. Very positive for the most part. For the most part, I'd say it's like 95, 5. I was gonna say like 85, 15. Okay, 85, 15.

But it probably feels that way because most of the iris directed at me. For what? Either being too hard on him, which grow up. Not letting him talk? Yeah. Yeah.

Which, I mean, all of it, I mean, first off, we cut like two large chunks of things he said because you know, actually from what you can see it in there, Ben asks him if he's a traitor, which is a yes or no question, and he tells like a 10 minute story about his grandparents. And so, and it's a very nice story. Yeah, it's lovely. But it was hard to keep him like focused. I think he like always kind of sound opportunity to give like yeah, right?

So Ben asked him if he was a trader and he was like, oh, this is a great time to tell this like story Archons people have worked on On why it's touching that I started Robin Hood. Yeah, so I think For the sake of like entertaining the audience and like keeping him on track, it was like, buddy, what? Yeah. Try to think back to what we asked you. I definitely, if I could go back, I probably wouldn't take acid. I think I would suggest you didn't do that either. Yeah. I mean, I was fine. If it was just, if it was, if you and I were more aligned and if I didn't have the fucking outline in front of me, because having the outline on the iPad was fucking my

shit up, because I kept on wanting to go, okay, let's get back on track. I was way more fixated on that than I'd have liked to have been. Around the 49 minute mark, we kind of hit our stride in terms of what I was hoping the conversation would start to gravitate toward. I really was hoping to talk a lot more about just the philosophy of where the buck stops. Who's shoulders does the responsibility ultimately fall? Is it the governing bodies, the SEC, the finras? Is it the broker dealers like Robin Hood?

Is it the individual investor? And I think that there's an argument to be made for each one of those groups for, you know, because you go and read it, there was a guy on Wall Street bedside just saw it, who said, fuck it, let's go, let's all collectively go back to just yolowing into shit. And it's like, I don't care how a user friendly

or gamified your app is, that mentality, you can't stop it. And that's up to individuals. Yeah. But I think, yeah, and I don't know if we got to it enough. I wanted to talk about more their role into that I think they were kind of like they were I mean We're encouraging it. Yeah, and we didn't even get to I wanted to throw up this graph. We had of you know the

The rate of options trading on Robinhood was so much higher right then on other apps. I wanted to talk about that with him I wanted to also call out the fact that Through no fault of Robinhood, there are funds out there who actively trade against the biggest positions that Robinhooders hold because there was data out there that shows like, oh, these are the top positions that are held in Robinhood accounts and there are funds that will actively trade against those because they know, oh, these are all fucking idiots. Also, I mean, which is interesting.

For the sake of, you know, not being a complete, what? I didn't wanna bring up some stuff to them cause it would just seem callous and insensitive. But I think some people may not know about, some of the stuff that happened with Robin Hood. We didn't talk about the kid who killed himself after Robin Hood showed him.

I think that he owed almost a million dollars something like that. And he tried to call Robin Hood customer service which basically was non-existent. You would get a voicemail. Blue my mind when I learned that because whenever I need to talk to my broker, I can easily get someone on the phone and they're knowledgeable. And there's a famous moment in the congressional hearings when one of the house members

calls the number. Calls the customer service number in front of them. And there's nothing there. And so I mean, yeah, there's just a lot of, we weren't that mean to him. I think we had questions about it. And also what was going on. And also, I mean, we also can't treat it as if the CEO of a company is the one pulling all the levers and strings all at once. There's product managers who, who's, who's, who's like, I would blame the product manager

for that. I mean, but the bucks got to stop somewhere and like, but that's how it works within a company. Like it, there's, there's levels. Yeah, but if you want to see the overall thing, but that's how it works within a company. Like, there's, there's levels. Yeah, we're seeing the overall thing. But yeah, true. Yeah. He can't come out and be like, look, my project manager fucked it up. Like that's just the worst CEO in the world. Yeah.

Like it's, it's got to fall in his shoulders. I also, and he's got a billion dollars because I also still firmly believe he should step down. No, 100% like for himself at the very, just for starters, like buddy, just quit. Just fucking quit. Get out, go enjoy your life. Go, if you really care that much

about the democratization of finance, go quit and then try to make a difference and like put all your time and effort toward affecting change in the legal system instead of your app. Oh, and to answer a couple of people's questions. So everyone was, I have a sticker on my water bottle. It sounds like bullshit to me. And apparently it was facing the camera at the whole time.

And everyone's like, I need to know if he was doing that on purpose. I was not. I did not know it was facing the camera. I think it's funny. That is funny. A funny coincidence. Yeah. There was also an alarming contingent of people,

if I'm using that word right, who think that we're in on the conspiracy. Oh, that's the best part. Oh man. The apes doing the full on Charlie Day and like the meme of just like him with the fucking core connections. Yeah.

And they're like, Vlad said, this is fun, this is all fun, Ben and Vlad, someone specifically said Ben and Vlad like planned this. Yeah. We'll stop asking questions. We know who you are. So part of the problem is someone cut it up and threw it on Reddit.

Yeah, it was so good. It was a really good. I feel bad because I don't think it's whatever. Oh, you mean you have a soul and a conscience and you know, I mean, I don't want people are fallible. Well, yeah, and like it's one thing. If you want to watch the interview and see how it went, whatever. But I feel bad that someone cut it up and makes it look like he's a total dipshit. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. And like, because that's not what we were trying to do. Yeah. And so it went like a little viral on Reddit, but you know, people were asking how, and maybe we should explain here, because people have asked us, how did this interview happen? Because they were like, why did, because we mentioned they asked us to come on. Yeah, their comms manager DMed us. We did not reach out to them.

Yeah. We had never thought about having them on. No. And they reached out and said, Hey, we'd like to come on the show. And my first thought, or what I said to you, I said, why? Yeah.

Yeah, because they said they've watched the show and a lot of times we're just Dicking around and calling billionaires assholes They probably thought that we'd be an easy target not target, but like hey, this will be an easy thing They'll be more impressed like with themselves about getting us and would probably oh, it's the Robin Hood story I think that was another reason why people were maybe a little bit like So, what was the Robin Hood story? I think that was another reason why people were maybe a little bit like, like they went too hard because I don't think they've ever seen people talk to a billionaire like that.

And maybe it was a little jarring. I want to get Charlie Munger on here. That'd be great. Ask him to do some push-ups or jumping jacks. Charlie Munger, you're definitely not going to die. No, that's me in spirit. Yeah. Charlie Munger, I did call him a, I havei jack, but come on, try that's mean spirit. Yeah Charlie monger. I did call him a I have nothing against him. I just thought it was funny to say he looked like Wet dog shit in a paper bag. Yeah, cuz he does but so they did The commas people did want to have a meeting with us to talk about it. Yeah, and I think they had

Originally a different hope for how it was going to go, but we were very upfront with them. Like they were like, we were hoping you guys could talk about how Robinhood offers crypto now. Yeah. And we were like, no, that would be what's called an advertisement. Right. And I said, I don't want to do a 90 minute Robinhood ad. Yeah. And so we basically told them where we want to be fun. And we want to ask them we wanna be fun and we wanna ask them real questions. If you guys don't wanna do it, don't do it. And they were like, no, go for it.

And we did it and now it's out there and you can watch it, it's episode 20. We're on episode 21 now. Yeah, remarkable. Remarkable. So moving on, ukraine has uh... oh yeah what happened and i don't i'm coming out of my isolation are we at war right now i don't know it's it's really wild

because it seems like every day there's the the united states is saying something then russia says something and i honestly trust neither i don't know who's saying what because puton said that at first, or Russia said that they were backing off and it caused the market to like, kind of rally for a moment. But then the United States said they're actually not backing off. They're just saying that.

Yeah, Russia said they were marching like 7,000 troops away from the border. Yeah, but then they actually added like 5,000 or something. Literally everything I've seen is, yeah, you can't tell what's going on. There were some journalists, I was watching, they were going, I have it on good authority, that Russia's knocking out the internet and electricity in Ukraine at 5.30 a.m. Eastern Standard time.

Wow. What? This is fucking insane. And then I'd wake up and nothing would happen. Yeah. It really is a weird scary thing because I'm sure most people saw that when Putin was addressing either NATO or the UN or something, I think it was last week, he essentially said, do not fuck with us. We want to do this thing. Or like basically basically if Ukraine joins NATO, they will be, NATO will be legally

obligated to like try to take back Crimea, which would, which would essentially he was hinting at cause nuclear war. That's ultimate. Because he said there will be no winners. And Joe Biden said, do it, Posey. He certainly did. Why don't we just use one of those Jewish space lasers that Marjorie Taylor Green talked about just that. We just said Marjorie Taylor Green over there. We should. Honestly, she could kick the shit out of my ass.

She would kill me. She would absolutely kill both of us. She's probably one of those women who can crush a watermelon between her thighs. I would like it. People at my funeral would say, he died doing what he loved, getting his ass kicked by a large woman. Man, you know, I've never had my ass kicked, but I'm sure that if and when it happens, it will be by a large woman. It will be by a woman who would squeeze me, squeeze my head between her

her thighs. She's doing, I watch your head pop between her legs and I'm just going, I'm next. Oh, man, God, God willing, it should happen. Knock on wood for it to happen. Knock on wood, that's the way we go out. I had, I was talking about it though with someone who was asking me because we had touched on it a couple of weeks ago about how geopolitical events throughout history have had sort of muted effects on the markets and I was asked to kind of elaborate on that more. And you know, it really does, it varies from event to event.

Something like that, the drone strike in Yemen or the drone bombings on that oil refinery in Yemen. Sure, that's like what second effect here? You know, it might affect the price of oil somehow. I don't know, but something like this, I feel like it's a little, it's a little too, not callous, I don't know what the word is I'm looking for. TENUIS? No, no, it's a little more careless to shrug it off as just another geopolitical event. When the implications could potentially be a lot more far reaching than we assume.

But in the near term, people assume like, oh, why isn't the market all out crashing? Well, the market has had time to absorb this. What, what do you like? I was thinking about my tree-ie Taylor Green popping your ass. Please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please It sucks because Marjorie's my grandma's name, my dead grandma. You could just call her MTG. MTG. Yeah.

I want my MTG. Sorry, I cut you off because I had that image in my head. Yeah. Well, so it's okay. Basically, in situations like this where everyone is prepared for the market to drop, everyone is hedged, everyone thinks that they're being smart, and everyone is like, yeah, the market's definitely going to drop. I got news for you.

Stop imagining my head getting popped by Marjorie Taylor Green's thighs, because I look over you and you're giggling. Basically, I'm just not gonna look at him. But when everybody is preparing for an event, it makes it all the less likely that that event will cause the thing that everyone is assuming will happen. Because everyone is insured, and that goes to the market likes to fuck

the majority of people, the majority of the time. He is crying. He's crying, he's delirious. Hey. Oh, is that my voice? No, it's not. Hopefully the COVID helps with my voice. I'm like, remember that friends episode?

Where Chandler gets COVID? No. Where Phoebe gets sick and everyone likes her singing voice at that point. Oh, because it's raspy. Yeah. And I no longer have muppet voice because of COVID. No, your voice sounds exactly the same. Okay.

So. But. So I just wanted to share this quote from David Kelly, the chief global strategist at JP Morgan. He said that a Russian invasion of Ukraine could be expected to drive up energy prices while the prices of other commodities could also surge. And higher prices could destroy demand and perhaps tip several economies into an outright recession. There was an interesting theory because there's this pipeline, this oil pipeline, the Nord

string to Germany. Yeah. From Russia. From Russia crosses the black sea, I believe, and goes into Germany. And it's basically, it would give Russia a fuck ton of money because they'd be, it's supplying like twice Germany access to oil. Yeah. And it's supplying Germany with twice the amount that the current pipeline does, right?

So I, there's, there's, I don't know what the fuck's going on. Hopefully gas prices go up. Yeah, I'm excited for gas prices to go up. Because right now they're about $37 a gallon in California. Yeah, let's just bring it up to 50, why not? You know what, okay, so this is not an advertisement. I downloaded this app called Get Upside.

It's like a gas saving app. I don't know how the, oh, I think I know how it works, actually. Gas stations that participate give you a discount, like, you know, 15 cents a gallon or something like that, for you to come to, they just want you to come to their gas station. And I think the pay off for them is that you might potentially go inside and buy a candy bar, buy a soda, buy a lot of tickets. From what?

Tomb guess. You know, tomb guess, the AMP guy. That's the name of the AMP thing. Yeah, it means too much good stuff. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Do you know who I'm talking about? He's got like twizzlers for hair. Yeah, he does have twizzlers. I have a really funny story about tomb gusset. I'm not gonna tell it. I'll tell you later. Okay, fine. What did you fuck tomb gusset? No, no, it's not even bad. It's just like I the brain. I won't be able to like catch it. I understand. I understand. Well, so I downloaded it and I,

it gives you referral codes. So like, hey, if someone uses your referral code, you get an additional $0.15 per gallon off. So I'm like, damn, I got like 50,000 Twitter followers. I'm gonna try to get, take advantage of this. But there's no good way of tweeting that out without it seeming like some kind of weird scam or. Right. So I was like, hey guys, this is not a scam.

I'm not getting paid, but don't let this happen. Use my code so that I can get free gas and or get not free. Did you do it? Yeah. And like, I don't know, 20 people did, but then I deleted the tweet because it was embarrassing. So if you want my code DM me and I'll give you my code. How much gas did you get? Uh, well, now I have 45 cents per gallon off.

Oh, that's pretty good. I know, it's fantastic. On top of what is already being taken off. It's tight, frankly, it's tight. And I... Does it work at the United oil on sunset? I have no idea, but don't put that kind of shit in your car. Why?

Because... Is it bad gas? I don't know. kind of shit in your car. Why? Because... Is it bad gas? I don't know. My Volvo mechanic was like, use only Chevron. No, use only Chevron. I think my 2008 Honda CRB can handle it. Probably. Well, my old-ass Volvo kit is very sensitive.

Yeah, you have to put like premium in that... I do, I put premium in that bitch. That's how it goes. It's the way it goes. I washed it yesterday. My car felt good. Put some elbow grease into it. I need to wash mine's disgusting.

Yeah. What's next? We got, uh, Oh, this is big. This one, man, this pisses me off. Why? Because I traded the stock and I was up like 500, but then another one, I was up like 600 bucks

on it this morning and then I got stopped out for a hundred dollar loss. True social dropped, the beta. Trump's back, baby. Trump's Trump between, what are you doing over there? I'm looking at the price of DWAC. I love it. Well, DWAC is...

Did you get to act? I did get to act. I had 300 shares at like 86 bucks. It shot up to 90, but I had gotten stopped out. So it's fine. Digital World Acquisition Corp, which is the SP 90, but I had gotten stopped out. So it's fine. Digital World Acquisition Corp, which is the SPAC, the special purpose acquisition company that is supposed to be for true social. Yeah. You know what's funny? So truth social touts themselves as this beacon of free speech. It's, it's the answer to the oppressive left wing technocrats who police free speech,

left and right, who shut down the conversation between free market conservatives and the sensitive snowflake libs. And then in the terms of service for true social. It basically says you cannot talk trash about truth social or criticize truth social or or anything we don't like or we can ban you from our app. I mean, that's a fair rule. They're building this thing for you to use, have fun on. How dare you talk trash on. You're gonna talk shit on. Yeah, truth. Come on. I'm inviting you to my house. You're gonna talk shit. What a piece of shit it is. You're gonna do an upper decor in my name toy. Yeah. Get out of here. Yeah. One rule. Don't a piece of shit it is. You're gonna do an upper decker in my damn toy Yeah, get out of here. Yeah one rule. Don't talk about how shitty I mean that's what's funny about a Donald Trump is he would always

You know he would dish it all the time, but could not take it. I feel like he could take it. No, he couldn't well No, he would get very worked up and then he would get funny Yeah, he certainly was. When he wasn't making me pull my hair out from how frustratingly, you know, it's weird how we all talk about like what we're all like, oh, like, can we just go back to before the pandemic? Yeah. Everyone's reminiscing about Trump being president.

I mean, people vote with their wallets, man, and the stock market was at all. No, well, they're not talking about that. That. They're talking about no virus. Oh, yeah, yeah. That just speaks to how either, I don't know what it says about us that we're like, let's go back. I mean, I want to fucking go back. Yeah, but this fucking shit.

I wish we could go back to the timeline where Hillary is president. Think about it. He's just shaking your head. Oh, man. I wonder, I wonder how deep into World War III would be by now. If Hillary was president, yeah. You think she would do it? No, I don't, I don't think so. I don't know what would have happened. It's pointless to even think about because. Nothing would have happened. Yeah. Jeffrey Epstein would have been unalived sooner. You think the, oh yeah, you think the Clinton crime I don't know.

I'm not a conspiracy theorist. Sure, right. And again, we are now in the, in the, in the, in the, in the, the, the throws of a world where conspiracy theories are, are actual realities, you know. Mm-hmm. Like it turned out the whole pizza game thing was real,

which is crazy. Yeah, they were really putting children on pizza. They were putting children on pizza. They were making pepperoni out of the children. Man, I want pizza, goddamn. But truth, I tried to get on the beta. Doesn't it cost money to download? I don't know, it said, because on the app store, right now to get on the beta. Doesn't it cost money to download? I don't know.

It said, because on the app store, right now it's in beta mode. I'm surprised they don't offer alpha. I'm surprised they allowed it to be called beta mode. Yeah, you think that they would call it alpha. Or sigma. Is sigma higher than beta? No, it's like a, it's like a new thing of like,

alpha male is like the top dog. The leader, but sigma male is like, you go off and do your own thing. Oh yeah, alone wolf. I think. Yeah, I think I have that right. Hey, how do you pronounce the word W-O-L-F? Wolf.

Wolf. Wolf? Yeah, I wanna say wolf. Okay, good. Wolf? Yeah, there's people who call them whoofs. No, there's that. Yeah, you've never heard people say, you know, Oh, those whoofs over there. Yes. No. Yes, that's a thing. People, it's, it's like an east coast thing, I think. There's a certain part of the country. I'm from these coast. Yeah, but there's, like, there's certain, you don't say water. You're talking about Pennsylvania people. Yeah, I think

Pennsylvania people would say wolf. Okay. I look at that wolf over there, see water. You're talking about Pennsylvania people. Yeah, I think Pennsylvania people would say wolf. Okay. Look at that wolf over there drinking water. Shut the fuck up, get the fuck out of my house. That's what I would say. They, Pennsylvania, it depends, Pittsburgh, Philly, they all got weird things. Yeah.

I remember sleeping over at a guy's house who I met off the internet. That's a weird way to start that sentence. That's not real. But yes, I did. How did you end up sleeping over at a guy's house who I'm out of the internet. That's a weird way to start that sentence. That's not real. But yes, I did. How did you end up sleeping over at a guy's house? I was having, I had a layover in, I was flying to Spain. This is in like 2013, 2014. And I was, I had a layover in Philadelphia

and I went on vine and I put out a vine saying, hey, if anybody lives in Philadelphia wants to hang out with me for the next 12 hours before my flight tomorrow morning. You know, and this guy reached out and he said, I'll come pick you up right now. I'm just at a bar and I was like, cool. Drive drunk, I guess.

It's feeling he came and picked me up. We went out, I'm the first time meeting the guy. We went out, we had a great time. And then he brought me back to his house where he and his dad lived and they were indoor smokers. Oh, great. Yeah. So it was like, tar on everything.

And then in the morning, he was like, I said, you know, I never had a Philly cheesesteak. Oh, we got to get you a Philly cheesesteak. So I had one for breakfast and I almost fucking vomited. You know what, I was watching a lot of Colombo while I was sick. What the fuck is Colombo? You know what Colombo is? No. Hey, leave a comment if you know what Colombo is.

Is it a show? It's an old show. Oh, it's an old show. With Peter Falk. Okay. But it just reminded me, because you can't help but notice everyone smokes and indoors. Yeah.

And I'm going, what a nightmare. Yeah. Also, you should watch Colombo, if fucking rocks. I'm not going to do that, man. Okay. Maybe it will. I also feel like I got into, because you're so bored, there's nothing to do. Yeah.

And I was watching like, I was watching shit, I would never watch. I don't watch that movie. Like Colombo. No, Colombo rocks. Okay, Colombo rocks. Like everyone should watch Colombo. We gotta get that on merch.

Colombo. Trillionaire mindset, merchandise, and the unofficial Colombo fan merch. You would love it. Yeah, probably. It's super sick. Okay. But I do like most things.

Go on. I was watching Inventing Anna. Don't know what that is. Oh, about that crazy girl. It's the Netflix show. Yeah. And it's such dog shit. And it was like unbelievable how bad it was.

And I almost was like gonna tweet about it and stuff and then I was like I don't want to be one of those fucking people who like just dogs on shit cuz Is that the end of it? I'm trying to help you with your COVID brain because I see sometimes like the neurons just firing and you're just No, I think the point is stop watching shit. You don't enjoy it. I'm just fucking sit at home. If you don't like it, just turn it the fuck off.

Yeah, that's right. That's what I did. You're still facing me this whole time, but you know, it's fine. I'm facing you. It's okay. You know, at this point, when I was in high school, when I was- I've been holding my breath all the time. Yeah, like mayor Garcetti.

Yeah. Fuck that guy. I remember when I was in high school, and whenever somebody would get sick and they came to school, because that's just what you did back then, I would have guys whenever they had to sneeze or cough, they would sneeze or cough, and I would seriously go,

Jesus, can't mail it, because I was like, I don't have the balls to fake sick, I'm not gonna fake sick. Mine is we'll get real sick, so I can be, in my dumber brain, I was like, ooh, being sick is cozy.

And then I would get sick and be like, this fucking sucks, what did I do? Uh, maybe that's why you don't have COVID now because you were exposing yourself to so many fucking... I am full of bad ideas. I also remember in middle school, I had PE in the morning one year, and I was so tired and I thought,

I know what I'll do, stare into the into the sun and that'll wake me up. Jesus. So I would hold my eyes open and like, see if I get staring the sun for five seconds and then go, we're going to lose audience members. They're going to be like, this is the fucking guy that I DM and ask for like trading advice. I get DMs from people. It's so nice.

They're like, thank you guys for making this stuff fun. Like I fucking, I never can listen to stuff about this because it's so boring and dull. And you guys have got me interested in it. Like I'm learning so much. Thank you. And then you're just like, yeah, I don't know. I would just fucking pop my eyes wide open and stare right into this. Yeah, I did. There's a guy on TikTok I saw who believes that staring into this sun is good for you. Did you see the TikTok with the guy who spends $2,000 a month on water?

No, is it alkaline water or something? It's, it's Voss. It's just Voss water? I can't tell if it's like a bit to make people upset on the internet and to go viral and like if I'm just getting duped or if this guy's insane person bit to make people upset on the internet and to go viral and like if I'm just getting duped or if this guy's in insane person. We should invent a product and then try to let

the TikTok algorithm pick us up and make a ton of money like liver king. Come milk, baby. Come milk, or dog shit chocolate. Let's get on it. And we'll just end the commercial with like, all right, we gotta go, we're busy milking. Okay.

We're gonna pop these blueies and keep the boners going. Sorry. Okay, we gotta talk about, you know, who had a rough week is that Elon Musk. Oh, Elon's terrible, no good. Yeah. According to the LA Times, California is suing over the treatment of black employees by Tesla employees. This one is important to say it's from the New York Times, because we were both reading it, and we were going, this can't be real. Insane.

Yeah, it's totally insane. If it wasn't in the LA Times or another like, reputable publication, I'd go, this is just for clicks or something. This is fucking crazy. Yeah. We have to read some of the, I mean, here's some of the highlights from it. Black workers at Tesla's California plant were called the N word daily

along with slurs such as quote monkey toes Why I've never heard that before banana boy What are you eating a banana or something hood rats and my, a Spanish word for dung beetle. I love Spanish word insults because it goes to your dung beetle. It's insane. I don't even... Yeah. Tesla segregated black workers into separate areas that its employees referred to. I don't even want to read this. I mean, it gets gross. Well, I think it's important because we talk about this guy a lot. And I think this guy can do no wrong to a lot of people,

and I just, so we're gonna read through some of these. Maybe we should put like a content warning. It's absolutely horny. Let's go down to, they were relegated to the factory's most difficult physical jobs. There was graffiti, including KKK, go back to Africa, the Hangman's News, the Confederate flag, and fucking inward.

That was carved into restroom walls, workplace benches, lunch tables, and Tesla was slow to erase them. Who like, who is Tesla employing? I don't know if it's these people that are the cause of all their poor quality control with the like the panels not lining up is these racist idiots who are like, what are these kids 14 year old gamers? Tesla employs gamers, it sounds like.

I have no idea. Because this is total gamer language and behavior. This is like 14 year old white boy playing Halo 3. I think it goes beyond gamers. Yes, it's gamers. There's probably their parents. Right. I mean, I don't know. I think it goes beyond gamers. There's probably their parents. Right. I mean, I don't know.

I have no idea. You heard it here, folks. Tesla employs the parents of gamers. But so they also said black workers complaints were ignored or profanctually acknowledged and then dismissed by management. Those who complained were subject to retaliatory harassment, undesirable assignments, termination.

Tesla called. So Tesla's official response, they called it, quote, a narrative spun by the DFEH, which is the Department of Fair Employment and housing or something. It's the body that's suing them, I believe. They said it's a narrative spun by them and a handful of plaintiff firms to generate publicity. And then Elon Musk apparently previously told offended

workers that they should be quote thick skinned after quote unintentional slurs. What the fuck is an unintentional slur? It's not like you slip down and you say something terrible. That's not normal behavior. There are no unintentional slurs. I'm very curious to see if any of the, any of the toxic Elon fan base will, Oh, it's a given, buddy. Well, what? They probably assume that it's all just,

It's fun. It's fun. Yeah, any bad news about daddy is fun. The man can do no wrong. By virtue of the fact that he is the wealthiest man in the world, and a genius, and he build big rocket. Right. He build big rocket, electric car. There's some stag coin, dogecoin. There's a number of these guys now. There's like, there's nothing that can happen to turn the rabid fan base on them. Nothing. Elon Musk could personally go over to each

and every one of these guys houses, fuck their mother or wife or sister or whoever, and then blast the come on the guy's face, slap him in the face, say, I fucking hate you, and then leave, and the guy would be like, if it's D is tight. He had a good reason for doing this. He had a good reason.

Autonomous driving is sick. If it helps him lead us to Mars, then he can fuck my entire family. Yeah. God. Just go to Mars. Just put all these guys on the rocket. No, so I'm very curious to see what's gonna happen with that.

But so that's only the start of this bad week. Bad week. There's a lot. I'm sure when you're worth $230 billion, there's no such thing as a bad week anymore. A bad week anymore. A bad week is like all the stocks down 5%. Right. Or Grimes is like,

Honey, can you go pick up some groceries? How are she talks? What? Is that how you she talks? Yeah, you didn't know. She's got a list that's fake. I've been told by a friend that it's a fake list. No way. Yes. That's cool. I would do that if I was famous.

I would too. a fake list. No way. Yes. That's cool. I would do that if I was famous. I would too. I would do a go-well and talk like this. Okay. Anyway. So then you had NASA raising concerns over the satellites for, it's not Neuralink, it's Starlink. Starlink. But this turns out to just be kind of a click baity because, yeah, NASA has concerns, but they're actively talking with SpaceX to mitigate these concerns because,

you know, the risks are near misses, collisions with science and crude missions, maneuvering capability failures, interference with space and ground-based telescopes and launch scheduled delays. Because they're talking about 30,000 satellites. Ink by Elon Musk. And currently there are like, I don't even know how many, 3000 satellites up in there. There's basically the 35,000 satellites it would take would be a 1500% increase in total satellites. There are out there. And I believe it would be visible from Earth. You could see like a band. No way. Yeah. Oh yeah. When you have that many satellites,

it would create like some sort of artificial constellation, which I think is kind of tight. We should just block out the sun. That'll solve Bill Gates is funding some sort of tech startup that has aspirations to do that to combat global warming. Jesus. Yeah. We're living in a bad dream. Yeah. Wake up.

Have you seen those guys on TikTok who do the pranks by going up to people and saying, wake up? Oh, and it's like, you know, man, you hit your head pretty hard there, like. Yeah. It's 2012. You're dreaming, wake up.

Your family wants you to wake up, and then people just go, what? Cool prank. If someone said that to me, I'd be like, excuse me. Wait, what? I'm asleep and freak out. Yeah, the proliferation of kids on TikTok doing pranks is pissing me off. Yeah, I don't use TikTok that much, but anytime I like scroll for a second, there's always kids. I'd be pissed if some kid tried to fucking prank me.

I get pissed because there's a lot of dumb high school kids pranking their poor fucking teachers. And their parents leave your teachers alone. But now I don't buy any of it. I think everyone's in on it. No, the ones that I saw, not in on it, the teachers definitely like I would fucking choke you. Like have you ever seen the little Tomah kid? No. He's like this like short kid who like, people are gonna know who it is. He like goes into like Target or something and he'll be in the aisle.

And then what he'll do is he'll take one of those big confiders or something. And he'll fucking whack some dude with it and then he'll fall to the ground and his friends are in the other aisle throwing pillows over. And he's like, I don't know what's going on. Yeah. That kid's just like his whole thing is just fucking pranking people. Pranks are stupid.

If that kid waxed me with a fucking thing, I'm suing. I will sue. Yeah. I'm allergic to blankets. You just got yourself a lawsuit. Toma. You had the monkeys dying from the Neuralink implant. Oh, yeah. 15 out at I think 23 monkeys died. I feel bad because you made that joke.

When we first talked about the Neuralink thing, you said, we'll talk about the Neuralink with people's head start exploding. Oh, yeah. And the monkeys had exploded instead. Those poor monkeys, they were macaques, which are like very, aren't they very, very, very intelligent monkeys?

I don't know. All monkeys are intelligent if you ask me. That is true. That is true. That is true. They do be smart. Yeah. Do you know how monkeys open bananas? With their feet and they push from the bottom. I didn't know it was with their feet.

I don't know if it's with their feet. They pinch, yeah, they don't, you know, normal. They don't peel them. They don't peel them. They pinch the tip and like the bottom, I guess. And it's the smarter way to open a fucking banana. Is that how you do it? How am I doing man?

And you bite the little seed because I'm a freak. Oh yeah. Because I tell myself that there's a ton of nutrients in it. I'm like, hey, if a whole banana tree can grow from this little seed, imagine how much condensed nutrients is in that seed. No, no, no, no, no. I heard they were bad for you though. The seed? Actually, I mean, I don, no. I heard they were bad for you though. The seed?

Actually, I mean, I don't know. I eat the apple whole. Yeah, that's a special kind of freak that you are, my friend. You were wearing a Patagonia fleece. Of course you eat the whole apple. It's just more apple. I don't know what people are, it's like, the core is a myth. Jesus, God.

I try it. No, okay. It's like thicker. I don't know. I don't like it. It's not. Okay. It just tastes like apple.

I blame looney tunes. So many apple chords and apple chords. The cartoon, yeah. Tossin out the apple chords. Okay, first looney tunes are people eating apple chords though. Looney tunes. Do you think so? Yeah.

Mel Blanc, man. Blank. Then you had a man where it just all over the place. We are. I think it's my fault. We're covering a lot of news this time though. But there's no real, we're just like, oh, this happened and then we're like, monkeys open bananas weird. Hey, you hear about these monkeys opening these fucking bananas? Basically, okay, so we had the other Tesla problems

are the full self-driving. So there's this thing called FSD, which tends to be full self driving. Full self drive. It is currently in beta. If you wanna access it, you can either pay, I think, $12,999 or $200 a month. The software of the car has to rate you

on a scale of 100. As if you're a safe driver. To be eligible. And if you meet all those requirements, you get to have the self-driving, the full self-drive beta on your Tesla that currently about 60,000 Tesla owners enjoy. And it is obviously not without its problems. And we got this NHTSA thing this report. This guy said the front right tire blew out and only the side airbags deployed the car traveled about 500 yards along the road and then turned itself off

He could not get the horn to work nor put it in neutral. There were no warning signs before the incident in fact He belongs to a beta driving thing and for that day Tesla had rated him a 91 out of 100 I don't know what that means. He called Tesla roadside assistance and they said that they would not provide any help as it was viewed as an Accident not a self-driving issue. I mean, it's obviously not without its flaws, but There was a doctor who's practice. I don't think as a result of this was shut down, but his practice, I read that the practice that this guy had was shut down, so he's probably just driving around

in his Tesla pissed off, but he didn't have FSD, he just was driving around on autopilot, which is even less smart than his D- Wait, I thought they were the same thing. No, autopilot is like- So anyone can use autopilot? Yeah, autopilot is like... So anyone can use autopilot? Yeah, autopilot is like in on all Teslas. But if it's, yeah, I believe so.

I believe autopilot is like the lower touch thing that you're driving on the freeway and it steers for you and it gas and breaks for you. But it is not like the full on self driving. Holy shit. So this doctor crashed his car into a cop car because he was watching a movie because he was watching a movie on his phone. Jesus Christ. What a dork. What a total dork. I like to imagine that his name is like Dr. Spaghetti or something.

I'm Dr. Tom Spaghetti and I lost my practice so I've just been driving around in my Tesla watching movies on my phone. He just drives around town watching movies. I've never watched movies on my phone. So this was not even, this was years ago, not autopilot. We were all on a like road trip and everyone passed out except except for the driver, obviously. And someone woke up and was like, what the fuck are you doing? Because he was driving, but also watching a movie. Oh my God. Yeah.

And we were so pissed. Tesla, as well as Elon Musk, have apparently obviously pushed back on assertions that their autopilot feature is inherently unsafe. And I would kind of agree with that, but their website says, quote, many factors can impact the performance of autopilot components causing them to be unable to function as intended. These can include poor visibility, bright light, and narrow or winding roads. In addition to another number of other variables. It's the driver's responsibility to stay alert.

I would agree with that. It is not, they aren't inherently on there. It's like saying that guns aren't inherently evil. Like it's just an inanimate object. It's the intention with which you apply to it. It is the application of these autopilot components. Then is the anti-gun control. Yeah, no, wait, what? No, I'm, I'm pro gun control.

At least have to fucking take a test. I'm not even going to touch that. You had phantom braking occurring with, um, with the full self driving. with the full self-driving. Yeah, and so here's a big part of it. So safety advocates and regulators are highly critical of Tesla because of their willingness to allow their customers to essentially test this unfinished version of this product, Elon Musk has been touting as like,

he basically, I think on their last earnings call, he said that FSD has the potential to turn this asset class into the most valuable asset class in history aka cars turning into like robo taxis. I mean if he actually figures it out it would be here. Oh yeah of course but so an interesting thing the F feature, also there was a software update that allowed the cars to perform rolling stops. So they would mimic like the human equivalent, not equivalent, you know how we do rolling stops. You don't fully stop at a stop sign.

Their FSD was doing that. Like isn't that insane? You would think that they would, hey, it's a stop sign. Okay, the computer will stop, but it doesn't. It would do a rolling stop. Oh, it was rolling. It was doing rolling stops. Yeah, it's a stop sign. Okay, the computer will stop, but it doesn't. It would do a rolling stop. Oh, it was rolling. Yeah, it was doing rolling stops. Yeah, it was doing rolling stops.

That's wild. Yeah. So this is interesting. I did not know this, but Elon has said that their goal with FSD is to get, so get to a point where Tesla owners will loan out their cars when they're not using them to be used as RoboTaxies. point where Tesla owners will loan out their cars when they're not using them to be used as Robo Taxis. Tesla will what?

He said that the idea is that people will loan out their cars when they're not using them to be used as, so like if you're a Tesla owner, you're gonna call a car. Yeah, so you'll be chilling at home and your car will just go, bye, and go pick someone up and take him to the airport or whatever. I can't imagine that kind of thing going wrong. Like, no, that's going to be good. I, I, yeah, I would be, I personally wouldn't be disrespectful in the car, but people are disrespectful and are going to,

Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, You're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you're thinking, Oh, you I mean, yeah, there's inevitably like statistically there's gonna be guys jerking off in those cars

There's just gonna be coming those cars if you run the numbers. Yeah, if you run the numbers We in bed have crunched the numbers and guys are jacking off in there. I'm sure there's our I mean dang man I saw a video of a lady on Reddit with the guy jacking off in the Uber Dang man, I saw a video of a lady on Reddit. With the guy jacking off in the Uber. No, this is worse. This is a woman driving her car in the middle of the day with her moon roof open windows open. Titties out full on masturbating while driving. Yes.

No way. Yes, I saw it on the subreddit crazy fucking video. And boy, does it live up to that name? Let me tell you, because there are some crazy fucking videos on that. So we've crunched the numbers. And there are going to be ladies rubbing their bean flicking it. Everyone's going to be jacking. Everybody's going to just be jerking off. I mean that's the the the pinnacle of society. You can measure the success of a society by how freely it's your citizens are able to jerk off publicly. So it's low touch jerking off.

Is it better or worse if your citizens are jerking it? It's better. It's better. It's better. The more jerking, the better, because it means you're a happy society. It also means your hands free. Yeah. Well, no, you're not.

I mean, unless you're using some kind of advanced Japanese-made fleshlight, which brings us, we do want to know. Forget these fucking Tesla's. We need bullet trains. Yes, we do need bullet trains. So that means we need you to buy more used panties. Yeah, as many as you can.

And here's why. In Japan, they have the best public transportation, but in Japan, they also have vending machines where you can purchase used women's underwear. And you can draw a straight line from the vending machines to the bullet trains. Yeah. So in order to get us to the bullet trains, we first have to show our government that we are serious about it. And by doing, by purchasing used women's underwear, we are showing the government, hey, we want something. We are making a statement with our wallets by purchasing these things.

It's gonna, I'm going straight to the source. I've got a pair of Senator Jeff Tumey's underwear on the way to my house right now. Yeah, right on, dude. You gotta let me know how those smell. I will. Yeah, I bet they're white BVDs.

They are. You remember BVDs? No. BVDs were like the white jockey underwear. Right, right. Boy, to those things stain easily. Let me tell you, back when I didn't know how to wipe my ass properly. But we do have to mention because so we don't get,

you know, torched by the Elon fans. A part of this big week was Elon announced that he donated $5.7 billion the charity. Worth of Tesla shares. Right. But we don't know exactly where it went. There's no real details about it. Some speculate that it went to a donor advised fund, a DAF. And these DAFs are like the, you know, the iron of a lot of non-profit people because they're just kind of these, they're like kind of a loophole. You, they don't get dispersed right away.

They don't have to. There's not a lot of rules around them, but you do get, so when you donate it, you immediately get that tax right off. Even though it could just be sitting into, oh, right here, D.F.s are essentially black boxes since they don't carry specific requirements like annual distributions or public disclosures

of grants tied to a specific donor. So a lot of private funds that like rich people have, they have a lot of rules around it. They have to make certain disbursements of money to keep their charitable status active. These D.A.Fs don't have those same things. They also have a lot of workarounds of like, you know, I think with regular charitable accounts, it'll have stuff like, if you bought something for $100,000 and it appreciated and value to it, now it's worth a million or whatever, if you donated it, I think you'd only get to write off the 100,000. Interesting.

But I think with the D.A.F, you would get to write off the million. Right. And so we don't, what's this? One of the advantages of giving stock to a DAF is that Musk receives the tax benefit of the gift, a tax deduction of as much as 30% of his 2021 adjusted gross income, as soon as he makes the donation, even though the shares are sitting in the equivalent of a philanthropic holding tank. So, we don't know exactly what he did. Maybe he gave it to the world.

Who was he tweeting? Tweeted hunger. Yeah, the world hunger for. The world hunger force. Yeah. Maybe he gave it to them to solve world hunger, I don't know. But I hope he tweets about it. That is interesting.

And that is, I mean, you got to tip your hat to someone who's giving that much money. I've, but we don't know if he's giving it out. Right. Yeah. Because it could just be sitting in his fucking door advised. Basically, it's just, but he's going to get a 5.7 billion tax rate off regardless of whether it gets dispersed. It basically, so in a nutshell, he donated to charity, but it's just sitting there. It's it says that it might go to charity eventually. If he put it in a D.A.F. But there are no requirements as if with the traditional charity or traditional, but like that money would have to be annually distributed.

Yeah, but I mean, I don't think it all has to be it's certain percentages and stuff, but that they have to meet, but the D.A.F. Just doesn't have those. Yeah Um, I wanted it There's it so since we're talking about self-driving and since self-driving is such a It's such a hot topic and it's kind of one of the biggest potential technological shifts That society could be facing over the next decade because it is being worked on so fervently by Tesla and Tesla drivers.

There's this guy David Zipper. Cool name. Great name. No relation to to Vinnie Velcro. So he just did this interesting Twitter thread that takes popular points about self-driving cars and kind of just debunks them in short little bite size bursts. First one is self-driving cars will save lives. He says, yeah, this might happen. Autonomous vehicles definitely won't drive drunk or sleepy, but their machine learning also leads them to make mistakes that humans won't. So that is interesting, because there are mistakes that the machine would make that humans might

not like fucking, I don't know, driving off a cliff or veering into oncoming traffic on a small service road or something like that. And then he quotes this, I don't know what CMU is, I think it's a university, this engineering professor. Carnegie Mellon University. Oh, Carnegie Mellon. Oh, yeah, there you go. I'd like to Carnegie Mellon between Marjorie Taylor, Green's legs. Let me tell you that. I'd love to be in line next. So this guy Phil Koopman says, there's nothing I've seen showing whether autonomous vehicles will be safer than humans.

I don't know what the context is of that quote, but anyway, I digress. Next one, self-driving cars will reduce emissions. I agree with this. He says, no, they'll induce more driving because the task will become easier, even and even with electric vehicles, more driving because the task will become easier even and even with electric vehicles more driving equals more missions from breaks tires and Energy production and more sprawl Next one self-driving cars will reduce car dependence Know they fucking won't like people. You're not gonna share a little mini bus with people. Yeah, I'm not gonna hop in a car What's jacking off in yeah Yeah, I'm not gonna hop in a car ones jacking off in yeah

Car arrives and it's like three dudes just cranking their hogs. Okay. I'll wait for the next one next one arrives in this one lady What is it Valentine's day? Do this at home. Yeah Bob boo. Yeah, that's why you need public transport. Yes, there's a measure of Accountability we're all watching people go hey don't fucking all watching people go, hey, don't fucking do that They don't say don't fucking do that. I saw in other cars where people have been like put your fucking dick away I saw a video from New York with a woman jerking off right there and it was just nobody was saying anything because what are you gonna say to her? Hey, can you stop doing that, ma'am? Could you please stop doing that? Could you please stop rubbing yourself down this? There's a, you could just do an MTA voice.

Please keep your hands outside of your pants. Yeah, yeah, you could. Closing doors please. Bing-bong. You go up in the room. Bing-bong. Anyway, self-driving cars will be a game changer for those who are mobility impaired.

And he says, yeah, maybe in rural areas, but most people live in cities and suburbs where taxis and ride-hale cars already are available Next one Self-driving cars will boost productivity Who the fuck wants to work during their commute? Oh, thank God. I've got my self-driving car so I can do more work To and from the office get the fuck out of here. People are gonna be like that doctor and they're gonna be watching Shrek the Third or whatever.

Is it the third? Is it called Shrek the Third? I don't know. I'd be watching Demolition Man starring Wesley Snipes and Silvestre Stallone. Oh, I was thinking of repo man with Emilio Esteves. Yeah, I remember that one. Yeah, yeah, that was a weird one.

Yeah, people aren't gonna, yeah, a little bit. But that's the whole thing, right? When startups are always trying to sell their thing it's gonna make people more productive. Yeah, cool, that's exactly what we want. They're trying to sell it to their board and they're like, you know how you hate the average worker. You know how you think the average worker is a piece of shit?

And yes, I do. Go on. Tell me how can I fix this? Well this thing could make it more productive. By what percentage? A fuck ton. He's gonna get to jack off so it'll be clearer headed when he gets to work. And he won't jack off at work anymore.

Interesting. Huh. Maybe this will help us get rid of toilets at the workplace too since they can take care of their business to and from work instead of on my dime now you're talking about this is why I get paid the big bucks Johnson Right, guess what you're getting a 5% raise. Thank you, sir You're welcome Lastly self-driving cars will free up lots of urban parking spaces. Get the fuck, just how about we just stop all of this money and focus and technology being invested into cars could so much better serve us if we were

focusing it instead on public transportation. It's insane. It really is. It's like mind-boggling insane. Mind-bglingly insane. We just need some fucking good infrastructure. Let's get that shit cooking. Let's get it going. Mr. Elon Musk, please, sir, please, with your clever boring company. No, we need to like dare him and like,

goad him and be like, you can't figure out a fucking bulletin. Dude, I bet Elon Musk could not build a fucking drug system in Los Angeles. I bet he couldn't do it. He couldn't do it. No. Well, actually I do think he tried to, didn't he try to build the fucking bullet train

to San Francisco to LA? No, but he, no, that's the state of California is trying to do that. No, but he said he could do it, the hyperloop. Oh, yeah, but that's not a train, is it? Yeah, the state of California, I think, like, ran out of money. It's just a Tesla that goes really fast.

Yeah, it's just a Tesla that goes really fast. Yeah, it's just a Tesla that goes really fast. Oh, I think the federal government pulled funding from the train. So now it's just gonna be, there's gonna be a fast train in Central Valley. It just is interesting that the, well, by the way, the bullet train scares me because it just seems ripe for someone to fuck with it like Japan

They are not a nation of psychopaths. What there's not gonna be someone like huck in a brick over a fucking bridge And it goes through I can just imagine some bored mess out 25-year-old deep in the Central Valley being like I'm gonna fucking crush. No, dude My pocket change on the on the rail And then he gets hit or something like there's I can just see so many problems going also just make brick brickproof glass Buddy when the things coming at you at 300 kilometers an hour make it really thick Yeah, it is funny how they have to make the bullet train shape like big old cocks. Huh. What else are they gonna be shaped like? Definitely not but gin is let me tell you that. Just too many flaps. It cocks are aerodynamic. Yes, that's true. Yeah, that's much better

I was gonna say what are you two dimensional? We go this drag. Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Um, it, it, but I just want to say before we end here, it's stupid annoying and interesting that we have, um, we've got this richest guy in the world that we've just given carte blanche, uh, for him to just run his science experiments on everybody. I think it's cool. Give me a fucking Neuralink. Kill me.

If Marjorie Taylor Greene's not going to do it, put a chip in my head that blows my brain up or just simulates the feeling of getting your head squeezed by her massive thick thighs. That would actually be cool. He puts the Neuralink in and just forever I get to feel like Marjorie Taylor Greene is like squeezing your thighs. She would totally be me. You know who I think would be mean to me and I had a dream about it once is Who's that rapper who's crazy the woman? She's on like America's Got Talent or whatever. She's one of the judges. I never fuck Drake. I never fuck Bill or whatever What's her name? Nicki Minaj. Yes, she would be so mean to me if we had sex. Why?

I imagine she'd be on top of me, but she'd be like, fuck you little bitch. I'm gonna break your penis. I'm gonna break your penis. Why? I don't know. I think it's a Jew thing. I feel like she'd be like, you little squirmy Jew.

We're gonna cut all of this. What? We're gonna cut all of this. No, we shouldn't. Why? Because she said squirmy this. What? We're gonna cut all of this. No, we shouldn't. Why? Because he said square me, Jew. So? So what?

So what? Anyway, she'd be so fucking cruel to me. And then afterwards, she'd be really nice and like make me a bowl of ice cream. Oh, there's a happy ending. Yeah. Sorry. What was your point? Elon Musk has carte blanche.

To run its little science experiments. It does feel like we're in a bad dream. It feels like... Because it's like, why does this guy get to like dig under the city of Los Angeles and just... We have no... Fuck around and experiment with 60,000 people using autonomous driving, fully autonomous driving. And it's not just him. I mean Bill Gates is doing his little... Maybe we can block out the sun thing. I like that. Why?

Because you got to cool down the earth. We got to go down the earth. Well, it's just a part of the earth. I don't know if he heard, but it's getting hotter. It's getting very hot. Yeah. We have no functioning government. You know what'd be sick?

Hey, here's an idea of to get slow down global warming. Everybody just take off your clothes. No. Yeah. Anyway, kill your parents, shit your job. Sorry about this one, folks. We're gonna be better next week. I- It's a good episode. It wasn't. Yeah, I think so. Maybe it just feels like because I'm you're still in a fever dream. No, I don't have a fever. It's still like, I haven't had a fever in days, but that's good.

The, um, there's just like pressure in my fucking head. Yeah, that's the ghost of Marjorie Taylor Green getting to you. Yeah. So, anyway. Next week is gonna be so much better. Oh, next week's gonna be so sick. You guys should tune in because we're gonna be talking about shit, I don't even know yet.

It's President's Day weekend this weekend. So anyway, follow us on socials, like this video, leave a comment, please. We love you so much. Kill your parents, quit your job, shoot your pants, and love you. Bye.