The Truth Shall Make Ye Fret - Hogswatch Livestream 2024 - Thriving On A Hill

Episode Date: December 24, 2024

The Truth Shall Make Ye Fret is a podcast in which your hosts, Joanna Hagan and Francine Carrel, previously read and recapped every book from Sir Terry Pratchett’s Discworld series in chronological order. This week, a Very Special Hogswatch Extravaganza: we live-streamed an episode! Click here to enjoy the full thing with video: https://www.youtube.com/live/qm4hbR-pvAY Vital statistics! Letters to the Hogfathert! Tangents! Find us on the internet:Twitter: @MakeYeFretPodInstagram: @TheTruthShallMakeYeFretFacebook: @TheTruthShallMakeYeFretEmail: [e-mail]: www.patreon.com/thetruthshallmakeyefretDiscord: https://discord.gg/29wMyuDHGP Want to follow your hosts and their internet doings? Follow Joanna on twitter @joannahagan and follow Francine @francibambi Things we blathered on about:Link to the video version - YouTubePat Mandziy (does the cool folk horror-ish retelling of, e.g., Christmas tales) - TikTok Geckoemmy (parrots) - TikTok 66: The Carpet People Pt 1 (F5 To Pay Respects) - The Truth Shall Make Ye Fret Designing Terry Pratchett's Discworld - Discworld EmporiumPodcast recommendations! - TheTruthShallMakeYeFret.com---Music: Chris Collins, indiemusicbox.comSound effects: Craig Smith, Freesound

Hello lovely listeners and welcome to our HogsWatch Extravaganza 2024. Some of you may have already listened to and seen this episode on account of it's a recording of the live stream we did on the 21st on the winter solstice. However, if you'd like to listen to it again, feel free. Or if you would like to watch it and listen to it at the same time, you can click the link in the show notes and see it on YouTube. Some of it might make a bit more sense if we're referring to visual things, because I'm going to be honest, this is not hugely edited version of the episode. Yeah, so hope you enjoy it. It's just a casual chat really, we're not reviewing or recapping anything in particular. We may or may

not have a special guest heralded by Glingle bells, but you'll just have to wait and see, won't you? Anyway, I hope you all have a wonderful Hogswatch and New Year, and we will speak to you soon-ish. Take care. We'll do a live episode, she said. I'll sort out all the technology, she said. I think we are live. Okay. There was no need for me to be so belligerent on tonight of all nights. It's a sacred night, Francine. Right. Oh my god. Okay, hold on. I don't even know. I've got iron brief stay instead of diet coke

for a non festive reason, but I'm going to say it's festive. Yeah. I've got red wine because listeners, if you're drinking along with us, do a shot every time I complain about this. I've sprained my ankle. Do you want to sprain her ankle? Again. So you did a festive pratfall on the ice. I did a very festive pratfall on the completely not frozen

brick steps outside my house. Sorry. Symphony. No, it's fine. It's fine. So I'm drinking red wine because I had to drink something I could get my partner to put in my office six hours in advance, which limited my options for chilled or mulled things.

You left it in there like a little hamster feed. But not with the bottle and the straw, which I'm really upset about. Unfortunately, yeah. It is probably good for the sake of us not me being incredibly drunk by the end of this episode. Yeah, bright side. Yeah, we don't want me to be incredibly drunk by the end of this episode. Right, we're going to do the no, the steps are not okay, Daniel, they feel very bad about what they've done. We've got a live audience, they can witness the most important part of the podcast, which is when Francine and I make sure we're not so loud, we're clipping. Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah. Francine, would you like to go first?

Bersa! Perfect. Sound good. Okay. And you? Bersa! No, you're good. Even with the increased volume.

Okay. Beautiful. Okay. Um, well, as we're 10 minutes in, should we, uh, do you want to make a podcast? Yeah, all right. Let's make a podcast. Let's make a live podcast. We're actually doing this quite low tech, so we can't even put the intro music in. DG An extravaganza if you will, or even if you won't.

JL It is an extravaganza none than less. God, I've already forgotten how the intro goes. A podcast in which we were reading and recapping every book in Terry Pratchett's Discworld Series one of Simon and Grantological Order. I'm Joanna Hagan. DG And I'm Francine Carroll. JL And this is a live festive Hogswatch extravaganza in celebration of five years of an incredible journey. It's been such a journey, Joanna. It has been such a journey. So what we're going to do today, what we're going to do for you, lovely, lovely lot is we are going to go over some vital statistics from the five years of The True Shall Make

You Fred. Francine and I are going to sort of do a little mini interview with each other, all things related to the podcast and Discworld. We're not just going to ask each other weird random personal questions because we're going to do that when we have coffee tomorrow. Yeah, we did that on our first bonus episode ever maybe, didn't we? I think it was like our first lockdown episode. Yeah.

We asked each other like random, we used a random question generator. We should have done that today. Um, yeah, maybe. Yeah. Um, also I really did value being able to edit that one. Yeah, no, we did ramble a lot. Um, anyway, and then we are going to put in a little interval. Anyway, and then we are going to put in a little interval. We're going to have a 10-minute break for those who need to have a wee and top up drinks. And then we're going to take

listener questions. We have a few already, but please do put your questions in the chat. Although if you want to wait till after the interval so I don't have to do a lot of scrolling, that is fine. We've wrangled it so the chat is now metaphysically speaking the Hogfather's letter back. Yes. Obviously, there's no reason the Hogfather would interrupt this podcast at any point. No, but we have permission to dip into the letters, I believe. He has given us permission to dip into the letters and I'm going to go and find out what that is. I'm very sorry. This is all very unprofessional.

How many times have we told your partner to stop glingling during podcast recordings? I don't know. Again, I can't edit this, Joanna. I'm just going to just disappear while I go and yell at my partner. Well, I'm very sorry about this listeners. It's extremely unprofessional of us, but I suppose not that much more unprofessional than me absolutely failing to start the live stream when I said I would. I'm never going to forgive Joanna for this extremely unexpected diversion from our normal order of service. Is that only for funerals? Oh, thank goodness. Mary Hooks Watch.

Mary Hooks Watch hog rather. How are you Francine? Oh, I'm very well, thank you. It must be a year or so since we last saw each other, is that right? It has been a year. It has been an almost one could say maybe precedented year, Francine. It was always precedented. I just recently rewatched the clip of us meeting for the first time. Yes. And quite how startled I was by the beard skull combo.

And now I just say it's comfortingly familiar, which just goes to show something. It's not uncomfortable at all, Francine. It's a very comfortable beard and skull combo that I'll be keeping on for a normal amount of time. Um, because it's your face. Because it is my face. My completely normal human face.

Well, Francine, I'm sorry to... Do you know, I'm not sure we ever settled on why you've still got the skull. I don't know what you mean, this is my face, Francine. Like, is death still subbing? Anyway, Francine, let's not make anyone question the magic of Hogswatch. Gungle, gungle, gungle. What's fourth wall? No, there's no fourth wall. I've got some letters Francine

from your dear little listeners. We have dear little letters. So answer a few. Did you pass Joanna on the stairs? Not on the stairs, sorry, she can't use the stairs at the moment. Did you pass Joanna as you came in? She appears to have wandered off. She's chasing something. I don't know what. Oh well, hopefully she'll be back in a minute. She might be dealing with the pigs on the roof, but I know nothing about that obviously. Right, letters. So, Powder Monkey. Powder Monkey has asked, how do I explain to my 10-year-old that the Hogfather is real and the modern version of Santa is a creation of the marketing

department of a multinational sugar water distribution company. I think be very honest with your 10-year-old about blood on snow. It's time for them to learn the graphic side of life. It absolutely is. I started following somebody on TikTok whose name I've forgotten, but I will link in the show notes. Not that's much good to a live audience, who does a very good job of kind of folklorifying the idea of Santa calling him the red god and all things like that. It's all things like that. It's all very folk horror. It's great.

That sounds like a delight, Francie, and I think you should tell Joanna all about that. Oh yes, I will. Yes, absolutely. Stacey, Stacey would like a mace or a warhammer or a Captain Carrot one-man night watch with complete wardrobe of weapons. And Stacey, you've been very good this year. Well done, Stacey. You shall have a mace and a war hammer. Captain Carrot is not currently available because Angwar tried to eat me. It's the problem we all face. L'Occitane has been very good, has been a good keepal and would like some gardening energy and proper dribbly candles. And I do recommend,

Luxaire, that you acquire yourself a candle dribbler that is the correct way to acquire proper dribbly candles. Yes, union is the best way to go, of course. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yes, it's obviously. It's a little more expensive, but gosh, the trades, the craftsmanship. The craftsmanship, solid work. How many children do we think of candle dribblers? There should be. There should be. I don't know about that sort of thing because I'm

not in those books. Oh right. You're in all the books. No, sorry, because oh god, I'm really losing track of our own world. Right, where are we? Sorry, where are we? Migev would like peace and quiet, and also peace for everyone everywhere, which is a bit of a suck up thing to ask if you ask me, but Megev, you've been good enough, you shall have possibly some peace and quiet. You can have a break from us at least, that's what you want. Sorry, by us, I mean, I mean Joanna and Francie, and I just consider myself a member of the team. I think you're very much the third host of this podcast, Hogfather. I think you've reappeared

more than any of our guests, including Mark Burroughs. I'm competing with Mark Burroughs. He doesn't know it. It's a very one-sided competition, but I'm winning. Absolutely. Pee Dee, Pee Dee has had a lovely year. Well done, P.D. He's written a book and he'd like people to buy it next year. Well done, P.D. And he's going to be directing Masquerade. You know, I think P.D. has just sentenced himself promotion in the form of a letter to me. But he's a good listener. He's earned it. He's a mod extraordinaire, so I've heard. And that puts

a target on his back. That was a terrible joke that I stole from Mark Burroughs. So PD can have a lovely year and he would like a precedented trip around the sun next year. We will try our best to arrange some precedent. Karen has promised to have been very good this year and would like some extra hours in the day and would like me to rearrange the space time, continue them a little bit. And unfortunately, Francine and Joanna have very, very strict rules about the nature of causal reality and interfering with it.

So I'm afraid for Karen, I can't do that. It's really our one strict rule. It is literally the only podcast rule. Oh, but she would also like her father-in-law to get a clip along the ear. I'll arrange that. Emma I think we can do that. A little festive clip around the ear, never hurt anybody. Emma It depends on the size of the clip. I might throw a pick at him. Craig, this letter

obviously was received in the best of best Scottish accents and I shall do so now. Craig has had a lovely year and big congratulations to Craig on starting Life 3.0. Happy retirement and happy brand new hat. Well done for being such a wonderful Gepel. Absolutely. Gerson. I can't say that. No, you can't. Stick with Gepel. I think that can be the... It's like sheep. Yeah, it's singular and plural. Yes. Ella gets a special shout out this year.

Oh my gosh, yeah. Because Ella made a zine based on the podcast, which is the greatest gift that Francine and Joanna could ever have possibly received. We'll link to that in something like Show Notes. Well, Francine will link to that, not we. Hogfather doesn't know what the show notes are. Hogfather doesn't know about show notes. Literally beneath him wants to be published this obviously. Literally beneath me.

I'm a delight. But we'll link to the scene, it's a delight, it made us cry. And finally, Peter- Literally did in the office. Finally, Peter has asked for, instead of his normal wish list of premium soft-boiled black pudding scotch eggs, has asked if he could direct me, the Hogfather, to our dear little podcasting friends. They might be feeling wistful about coming to the end of their run of Discworld recaps and would benefit from some supernatural wisdom. Peter suggests that maybe I could

touch on what a wonderful body of work they've amassed over the five years and a good thing being completed is not the same as a good. Look, Peter sent a very, very lovely letter and for reasons unrelated to who I may or may not might be, I cannot read out the whole thing because it's very complimentary. But it was a delight and all of- It's possible, not relevant to this exact situation, but it's possible that I think Joanna, reading out compliments, could get so embarrassed, you could see her blush through a mask.

Unrelated to the situation, but yes, that could definitely happen. Peter, you're very welcome for the pork pie. You shall have another. Right. I've got to get on because I'm technically at work. Yes. Well, it is solstice night and I would really like the sun to rise again. Yes. No, I'd better go and get on with that. Sausages to deliver. Got to get the pigs off the roof. I'll turn this contraption off as best I can.

All right. But a very merry Hogswatch, Francine, to you, to Joanna, if she ever bloody returns, and to all of the dear little people listening and watching. A very merry Hogs, to you, to Joanna, if she ever bloody returns, and to all of the dear little GEEF all listening and watching. A very merry Hogg's watch to you, Hoggfather. And please tell Joanna to hurry. My improv has not gotten any better over five years. Wonderful. I'm very happy that there are people in the chat. I've noticed that somebody's telling on us to Mark Burroughs, which of course, Charlie, yes, that's fine. I think it'll just spur him onwards to greater things if he feels like he's competing with the Hogfather.

Hi. Hi Joanna. Sorry about that. There were fucking pigs in my garden. I had to chase them and I'm on a walking stick so it took a minute. Did I miss anything? No, nothing important really. Did the pigs manage to at least churn up the last of those nettle roots? They got a fair view of them out of the way. Right, if I didn't miss anything, why does it say in the podcast that the hog father was here?

Oh, because, you know. Did the hog father come and do it while I was gone? Well, I might have popped in briefly. Right, I'm getting sick of it. I need to address something now. I need to address something because the hog father has consistently ch consistently turned up on the podcast. I think he's doing it on purpose. I think he's putting the pigs in places to make me be absent so we don't cross paths.

Have you two got beef? I need to confess something on the podcast. You know I don't normally like to talk about my personal life on the podcast, Francine. No. I've never done that in the five years of The True Show Make You Fred. But some people are jumping to conclusions and I don't want conclusions to be jumped to unnecessarily. So I will say- It's right in their angle. Well, exactly. And we wouldn't want that to happen to anyone else. I will say and I will say this once and we will not discuss it again. The Hogfather and I have something of a history and it ended badly.

All right. Well, no, that's very nice. Say no more. Yeah. Say no more. Till tomorrow. Over coffee. Obviously over coffee tomorrow. I will tell you everything. The sordid affair I have with my grandfather. Anyway, anyway, what are we doing? We're doing a live podcast episode, aren't we? We are. We should probably try and remember that. But yeah, no. So Hilarity and The Hude, what do we have next? You can't read out the plan. That's literally what I'm doing the entire episode, just reading the plan directly. Coming up next Joanna, I believe we had some vital statistics written down about the podcast

which we have just more or less finished. Five years of vital statistics. We thought we'd tell you some numbers, some big numbers related to all of the nonsense. We love numbers. I did maths for this. This is a level of devotion that I think we should all really appreciate to be perfectly honest. First of all, because this was an easy figure to find and our RSS hosting website did it for us, all time total downloads of the true show make you fret. 317.8 thousand. Pretty good. Kind of ridiculous. Don't really want to think about that. I should have prepared graphs. I didn't prepare graphs. How would you even graph?

I would make them completely unrelated to the statistics I'm reading out. Yeah, that would be nice. If they get any done, I'll superimpose them over the year. Yeah, I'm not going to do that. Edited. I'm not editing this. That's the lovely thing about the hog swatch extravaganza. It's meant to be extravagant. And by extravagant, I mean rambling and unedited. Perfect. It's the only episode we record where I start drinking at the beginning of the episode, sort of halfway through. Yeah, usually I don't drive you to drink till the end of it.

I did try and calculate how many glasses of wine I might have had while recording or how many diet cokes have been consumed and I gave up. Also there's some information I don't want to know. Total number of episodes, because our numbered episodes don't include all of our wonderful bonus extravaganza's, 188, someone's just said in the chat, think about how many hours of you talking there are out there now. Well, we know. I'm not sure not to think about it for obvious reasons. I added all of this up and if my maths is correct, and it might not be because of who I am as a person, we have podcasted for 23,978 minutes, which Francine worked out is almost exactly 400 hours, which makes 399.63 recurring.

9.63 recurring. Yeah, this does make me suspicious. And it would put that first number in doubt as well. So listeners, if any of you happen to have this statistic, please let us know. But whatever it is, it's a lot. It's a lot. I mean, I'm going with the 400 hours number, because that's a good story. That's the nicest one, isn't it? So I'm going to say, yeah, we've just we've put it for 400 hours. Yeah. Which I am very proud of. All that nonsense we've put out into the world. We've actually podcasted for quite a lot longer. I was about to say, look at all the nonsense I cut out.

Yeah, Francine is an incredibly good editor. So when I say, I keep turning to look at the screen, I have the chat on when I'm addressing the audience. I was saying that when you were away. It's exactly what I'm doing. So yeah, post-it notes. This is the statistic I know everyone was waiting for. The number of post-it notes put into books by me, put in my books during this five-year run, 7,448. Like Heps and I, the book with the most post-it notes was Monstrous Regiment. Unsurprising. With Raising Steam, Nightwatch and The Truth coming in the two to four spots.

Did you ever stick to any kind of colour coding system? Yeah, I varied it slightly from book to book just so I could use up the big multi-packs of post-it notes, but I did have a colour coding system. Did you stick to, at one point it was purple for feminist rant, wasn't it? Well, that might have been mine. That was yours. You did purple Post-It note for Joanna Does Feminism. That's it.

Yeah, yeah. And then other important statistics. My foot looks like a traitor. How dare you? No, I think purple Post-It notes became one of my keeping track of plot point things when I used to pull the pink ones. Important statistic, arms flailed wildly. MS. Which I won't be risking today. MS. No, I won't.

MS. Maybe just this one. That's away from the equipment. MS. I've got a bottle of wine on my desk. I'm not flailing anything. Some bells for some reason. I don't know how they got there. MS. Did you just go and yell at Jed for nothing? Arms fail wildly. Literally too many to count. Modern maths simply cannot, especially since we hired that octopus. We haven't talked about the octopus. He's very private, but he's really been invaluable to keeping up the flailing numbers on the broadcast. Someone's just asked if I have kept the post-it notes.

They're all still in the books before we went live, Francine and I were talking about what I'm going to do because at some point I need to take all these post-its out of the books. I suggested to take them out one by one as she reread the books. Joanna cannot leave a job not entirely done once she started, so that wasn't going to work. Names of things in the thing. Another vital statistic, the answer I came out with was so many. I like how you kept these categories in after you decided you weren't going to count them. Yeah, there was no way I was going to count that. I was always going to make up the answers to

these, smash, just not give answers. And patriarchy ducks 37. Definitely really calculated that and didn't just think 37 was a fun number. Is that 37 ducks altogether or 37 quacks? 37 ducks, some of them did quack multiple times. Got it. Just to make it harder for anyone to check my homework that I didn't do. I had a look on the podcast transcript website. Yeah.

That's done a better job than I tried to do. I had to look to see various helicopters that we've had over the years. A long time ago, I think, Lox had looked at some of the early episodes to answer my questions about when we started all that nonsense. Helicopter Watch, it sounds like, started in episode six. And since then, I think my favorite two, just going by quick scan, were the notorious clockwork spoon devised by bloody stupid Johnson, which can apparently stir coffee so fast that the cup would actually rise up from the saucer and hit ceiling. Just what a fantastic image. And the other one was Mrs. Cakes helicopter parenting. Being both very metaphorical and yet not at all tenuous.

It worked. It worked. I am a genius. I think my favorite slash least favorite loincloth was fairly early on. I think it was in Reaper Man and you said that the loincloth was just the auditor's grey robe. And I said, oh, what, so any piece of fabric, any piece of clothing is now a loincloth? And you said, yeah, maybe.

And since then it has been pretty much. So I think that's when that really deteriorated. I do try and keep it near the crotch though, like a classy badge. Superb. Oh yeah, we didn't warn this at the start of the episode. I mean, A, we didn't do a spoiler warning. So spoilers, I guess, for some of the Disco World books. We will try and avoid spoiling like any major stuff, I think. Something something journey.

Yeah, journey. A lot on a sleigh pulled by a lot of pigs that was just on my fucking roof. Oh yeah, also we'll be swearing even though we're not quite post watershed in UK time. Yeah, I think it's probably fine. I'm assuming no one is going to log off this live stream because they were watching it with their six-year-old. If anyone's watching with your six-year-old, you did this. This is your fault. Six-year-old, if you're listening, here are some words you might not know. N. Here are some words to say around the dinner table in a few days.

G. Right. Should we interview each other? Should we do a little interview? N. Yeah. All right. Hang on. Let me take a swig of drinks. I can't edit this out. Oh my god. G. You can't edit eating mints or accidentally eating a cookie just as I ask you a question. Yeah, no. By the way, now I'm wearing a sparkly top. I went to a posh afternoon tea earlier as Joanne, Joanne knows. I'm officially like more festively dressed than I was for posh too earlier. So I wore that jumper because it was like posh posh. So I thought, you know, I was wearing that nice skirt. But you were a jumper. Yeah. So I think I think it looked good. But anyway, point is, I've made more of an effort now.

Well, I feel like that's fair. I feel like this is a much more important occasion than a poshers afternoon too. You should have seen when I first logged on, or when the call first started, and I saw Joanna, I'd have burst into laughter, because I'd completely forgotten that we usually dress up in this and I was wearing a huge oversized woolly jumper. Give me two minutes. I do own a sparkly item of clothing, one, brackets one. Joanna McAllister One sparkle. I was getting ready to put this on and I was in automatic getting ready mode which meant I put on my full face of makeup and then just stood up and sprayed some perfume on. I've not gone anywhere. No one can smell me, but I do smell lovely. You can smell you. I can smell me and I smell lovely and like J'adore by Dior. Oh, and I know what that smells like. So now we've got the...

Now we've got the verisimilitude. Yes. So with this interview, what's it? Are we going to do, because we've got three questions each. it. Are we going to do, because we've got three questions each. Are we going to do alternate? I think let's do alternate. I'll ask you a question, you ask me a question. We planned this guys, we planned this. Well, there is a plan. There is a plan in front of us and everything. So we'll start, I'll ask you. Having completed this epic five year journey, what is the biggest lesson you've learned and what are you most grateful for?

Well, first of all, Joanna, that is two questions, which is very much you. Got to get a smuggle. Crowbar that in. Also, the second half of the question, what are you most grateful for? Sounds to me a little like you've been watching too much American television, which I know to be the case. Yeah, I know I am binging Nego right now. But to counteract it, I also started- Oh no, oh, that's the giant foe.

Yeah. It was not on purpose, but- Full twee. Full twee. I did, to counteract it, I've also been watching Downton Abbey, so now I also feel like I need to massively overreact about everything. Yeah. But like in two very different ways. I like that. Yeah.

Nice. Anyway, sorry. Point is, I've learnt on this five-year journey that there is no subject that I find uninteresting, or certainly not when I've come across so far. And I think I'm grateful for that, because it's kind of opened up a new dimension of possibilities in just entertaining myself and in art and writing and all of that. Yes, the blind research aspect of it all and the rabbit holes and the tendons and the finials. I love the finials. I think have been, yeah, a side of it. Maybe I was expecting, but not to the extent we managed it. Adik, do you have an answer prepared for these?

It's sort of very vague little answers, maybe. I think as far as lesson I've learned, I'm normally just so good at procrastinating and this podcast has genuinely made me, I care about something enough I don't want to procrastinate doing it. Because it is – obviously, we have lots of fun making this, but it is still work and it is quite hard work. Just the strict deadline, the weekly thing, I've not really – apart from when I've been really ill and we're trying to record or something, I've not dreaded it. I've enjoyed putting the notes together and putting a plan together. Mm-hmm. That's cool. I will just note that there is a five-year-old listening. All right. Well...

Or not listening, but present. But yeah, Matt says he doesn't think she's listening, so that's fine. There is a five-year-old dog listening who doesn't speak English, and Charlie's cat is six, but she's allowed to swear. Cool. All right. Well, Matt, I'm sorry if your five-year-old learned some new words. We've got a how many homeworks were actually done question here. I did actually work out, well, the website worked out for me, the all-time downloads. I did actually do my best to work out the number of episodes the minutes broadcasted and I did actually calculate the number of posters, although I didn't physically count each individual poster, I based it off my notebooks.

I'm assuming this question is back when we used to say there's your homework. Oh, yeah. Sorry, I thought you were talking about the statistics. As far as that goes, literally never. I'm going to say 30%. Okay. Sometimes I would go and look stuff up, but not very often. And the most, mainly we assign stuff as homework so we wouldn't get distracted looking stuff up during the episode. It's the history of espionage Wikipedia page thing, Francine.

Which I hope will become shorthand for us forever now. It was stuck with me. The history of espionage Wikipedia page lives in my heart. And in your browser. And in my browser. I actually haven't clicked on it yet because I just know I can't. This is like when

I tried to do a bonus episode about foxes the other day and ended up deep in Herodotus trying to learn who Aesop was. Not okay. I've praised that badly. Deep in Herodotus. There we go. Perfect. Um, sorry, what are we doing? We're questions. Yes. So am I asking you a question now? You ask me a question. Joanna, which early Discworld book, and by early, let's say first third,

would you want to go back to and try again now that we've learned so much on this journey? Journey. Journey. Journey. Okay. Sorry, we're not doing ASMR. I think I kind of want to go back and do sorcery again, because I feel like, you know, I said I wasn't super into the Rincewind books when we started, I kind of came around on Rincewind quite a bit as we went along. But sorcery was definitely my least favourite of those.

And I feel like now I've got a new, because I do appreciate the first ones, because you sort of see how much room there is to grow and you can see the early seeds of something. I feel like sorcery deserves another shake from me. Okay, yeah, nice. Have you got one for this? I'm not sure I do really, but what usually happens is I will read something and think oh fuck, that would have been a really cool fact to add into episode fucking 15 or whatever it was. And then luckily it does leave my mind again so I don't live

in regret. But I don't know, I was thinking I'd quite like to do the first couple again, but then I listened to them recently and I quite like them just how they are. I wouldn't mind, as far as podcasting goes, I wouldn't mind specifically doing the Color of Magic again with our structure. We didn't have when we did the Color of Magic and recorded on a proper microphone. Yeah. So yeah, the very first one. I also wouldn't mind giving Eric another look, but not trying to split it into three episodes.

No, you've done it twice. I wouldn't actually, I'm not suggesting we actually do it. I just feel bad about how I feel bad about, I was so mean about Eric and then I was really mean about it when we guested on Desert Island Discworld as well, which was really unfair, but I was really tired because it was like 11 o'clock at night. Yeah, I was the nice one on that episode, I think. Yeah. Although it was edited so well that I don't think he came across as tired as he was.

Yeah, I know. Whoever edited that did the Lord's work. Anyway. National hero. Which nation? Who knows? There were several representatives. That was a very international episode, hence the it being 11 o'clock at night and me being

grouchy. This is a bit of a cop-out question, but I'm thinking about this specifically in the context. Which Discworld character would you most like to go for coffee with? I did ask this because this podcast started with us having coffee together. I feel very much in the context of the way we go for coffee, where we can meander to any subject we want within reason. Okay, so first of all, I would like to specify that I don't want really strong Discworld coffee. Like I've already been sober for quite a long time. I don't want to end up knurred.

Yeah, no, let's not do that. Sounds very bad. So yeah, it's interesting because it's a very different question to who's your favourite character, surprisingly. I was thinking about this because I doubt granny or vines would open up much over a cup of coffee. I think that Nari would be very interesting, but would terrify me into silence. And also I would definitely spill my coffee. You'd have one of those days where you just feel very embarrassed to exist. CHARLEYY Yeah, like your thumbs have just decided to be backwards for the entire day. MADDIE Exactly. So I'm going to say Nanny Og.

CHARLEYY Yeah, that's fair. MADDIE How about you? backwards for the entire day. Exactly. Yeah. So I'm gonna say Nanny Og. Yeah, that's fair. Mm, mm, how about you? I mean, Nanny Og's kind of my answer but if we replace coffee with going for a drink. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So if you had to stay sober. Yeah, if it was actually coffee

and I'm gonna sit down and maybe get to massively gossip. I wanna go with Agnes and Perdita. A, because I'm getting two for the price of one there. B, because I just feel like the gossip would be amazing. Yes. You know when you get like really good gossip about things you have zero stakes in? The Opera House gossip. The Opera House gossip. I would have no stakes, but I would get all of the drama. I think it would be

great. Yeah. Ridcully would also be good for similar reasons. Again, Ridcully is on the pub list rather than the coffee list. The big gossiper though, I think. Yeah. Again, Ridcully is on the pub list rather than coffee. The Dean, like super irritating, but I imagine would actually be quite fun over coffee. Yeah, yeah, absolutely. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Take him out of the constant competitive environment. Yeah. I know he's got a real name and he's now an arts chancellor himself, but he's the

Dean. He is the Dean. And it can't be helped. Look, we're not calling him two chairs and I think that's the Dean. He is the Dean. It can't be helped. Look, we're not calling him two chairs and I think that's good enough. Oh, and Ponder Stibbins, it's not so much I want to go for coffee as I want to take him for coffee because I feel like he needs a little half day off. Do you want to just let him have a nap on the table? Yeah, pretty much. I'll drink coffee. I'm just going to let him. What else have we got? Oh,'s always your turn to ask me one. CHARLEYY It is, it is. Which Discworld creature, and I'll be loose with the term creature, would you choose as your pet?

NARESH I really want a swamp dragon, so badly. Just one, just a little one. I would use it as a lighter. CHARLEYY Okay, I was gonna say, is this to be like a house swamp dragon or are we out in the stable? Are you going interchangeable Emma Horse Girl with it? Or is it like a little Chihuahua dragon? Yeah, I'm going more like little Chihuahua dragon vibes. This is very much a house dragon. Nice.

I just feel like my life would be better with a pet swamp dragon. What about you? Do you have a? Albatross. Oh, fair. Yeah. Yeah. No, it would be incredibly impractical. I've never kept birds before, but I think it was the first. What's the species name? I can't remember now. It's the something albatross. It's from the very first.

Oh my God, we can actually ask listeners. Listeners, on a postcard in the chat, please. If anyone can remember the name of the albatross, what the albatross was from Color of Magic. That would be great. Yeah. Anyway, yes, I am one of those because pre-post. Have you seen the price of first class stamps these days? I very much have seen the price of first class stamps these days. We just saw Christmas cards. Oh, God, yeah. I did do something similar for a completely different project. And yeah, good grief. Somebody's asking what scumble might taste like in coffee.

I would not put scumble. Well, I'm going to get to this when we get to the listener questions. Because we've got another question about festive drinks. Very important you don't start drinking scumble before then. I am not going to start drinking scumble until during the listen now. I'm not going to drink scumble on the podcast. It's not safe. Pointless albatross, someone has said. That's it. Thank you. Yes. I would love a pointless albatross. I support this dream of yours having a pointless albatross. Well, that's so sweet of you, especially when I told you you couldn't get a bird.

No, I think it was for the best that you told me I couldn't get a bird. I think you were right to say that I couldn't get a bird. I should not have a bird. I just remember that very clearly. Is the one thing I was very clear that I was not going to support you in during your big life changes. Oh yeah. I was mad single and it was locked down.

I thought a bird would solve my problems. Another TikTok account I follow, it's called geckoemi I think, but mainly parrot content and bird content. Fantastic. It has shown me I absolutely could not keep a parrot or anything similar, but I have a much more respectful attitude towards them now. Yeah. They are, they're fascinating and yeah, I can't do it.

That's not who I am as a person. I could befriend an army of crows and I will one day. Yeah, there are quite a lot of crows around here in our new place. So I might, I might try. The problem is I've usually got the dog with me and the dog would like very much to meet the crows in an unfriendly manner. Which is a shame because your dog like aesthetically would go really well with an army of crows.

Yeah, absolutely. She's learned to get along with the chickens on the farm, so maybe we could. We could get there. We could work on it, yeah. It's my turn. What are you going to do with all of your marvellous extra time during our hiatus? Well, I mean, during the hiatus, I'm kind of ongoing because we're not going back to the same kind of volume. But yeah, so I think I'm going to try and read and write some stuff that's not, that's not this world related. Wow. Yeah, it'll be

weird. Because I say that but at this point, you know, the fucking books I've got are all stemming from interests. Yeah, I'll try and read some novels. I'll try and read some novels. I've read barely any novels that haven't been disqualified in the last five years. Oh, what was the one I read really recently that I read and thought you would really enjoy? Sorry, I'm Googling. No, no, you're fine. And so yeah, it'll be nice to have time to rewrite something that's not podcast related and I'm going to try and get that substat going properly. Oh, that would be really good. I want to read more of your writing.

Thank you. That's very sweet of you. The Adventures of Amina Al-Sarrafi by Shannon Chakraborty is a very cool, like slightly piratey, magic high season stuff, but all set around. I'll lend it to you because you're coming to my house tomorrow. I am coming to your house tomorrow. Yeah, you'll really enjoy it. And I recommend that to everyone. Anyone suggesting that we read Gorman-Gast clearly does not understand the nature of... We're not reading Gorman-Gast, guys. We can't read Gorman-Gast at this point. There's some kind of weird force field around it.

Charlie's just recommended Kushiel's Dart, which is actually a really good trilogy. I haven't finished them yet, but I have got all the Kushiel's dark books. Kara gave me those, I think, who is a friend of us, but not the pod. Yeah. But those are really good ones. Scandal. And I just got given a very good looking book for Christmas that I now can't remember the title of. It was given to the person who gave it to me, didn't have time to wrap it,

which means I'm allowed to know that I've been given it already. But it's like a fantasy, but around the time of sort of French Revolution and Marie Antoinette and everything. So extremely me very, very much No, with all of that. I mean, realistically, I need to start work on my next nonfiction book. I have been working on fiction while we've been doing less episodes. I'm really looking forward to reading some of your fiction. I'm very excited to actually properly write it and stop just outlining and then staring at the outline and going, that doesn't make sense. That character seems vaguely similar to a character in another book I've read so I must delete the character but the whole thing hinges

on the character. Stuff like that. I'm being really normal about this. But yeah, no, I took up quilting. I'm probably going to do more of that. I'll probably knit another jumper. Might take up weaving. Might finally get that loom. Okay. You've got room for a loom now. I've got room for a loom. I don't have a full room to have a like specific loom room. But I have room for a loom. I can't have a loom room. This is one of many times we've discussed your loom room over Zoom. One time I'll come on Zoom and tell you I've got a loom room. Which will be how I tell you I've broken up with my partner. No, we're not doing that.

Francine, I've got a loom room. Nevermind, weave a tapestry about it. I've started to weave a bit more embroidery. I've got a bit of beeswax from you know, Jack's uncle keeps bees. We've always got a lot of honey and things like that. But he's giving me a nice chunk of beeswax because coating embroidery thread makes it a bit easier, apparently. Oh cool. Especially if like me, you buy cheap embroidery thread. Yeah, I felt like I could be better at some of my hobbies if I didn't buy the cheapest version of literally everything. I know, but when you're starting out, you know, I'd be in a lot more depth than I am if I kept

buying the expensive versions of things before I decided whether I like something. Yeah. Also, it turns out I didn't buy the most... I'm making that moth jumper I talked about, and I didn't buy the most expensive wool for that. And even so, it's like 50 quid's worth of wool to make that jumper. Yeah, wool is expensive. Yeah, wool is expensive. And I got some nice washable merino, so it's not the most expensive, but it's not the cheapest wool I could have bought for the project. Okay, I have one last question.

Yes. Have you decided which Discworld book or books you would most want to turn into a screenplay? We've talked about it extensively as timers. Yes. It is still either the Guards books, because I feel like there is a way to turn all of those books into a very cool series that is like a detective series that has the plots from the books but has some case of the week, monster of the week stuff incorporated as well. But in a way that is lighthearted and fun to watch and not like with the tone of CSI because not a particularly lighthearted and fun to watch and not like with the tone of CSI, because

not particularly lighthearted and fun to watch show. So yeah, doing it as a kind of parody of like TV cop dramas. But also Monstrous Regiment, which is ends up being my answer to like, quite a lot of questions we get asked. But just because the story is so meaningful for me, and I think there's a, because it works so well as a standalone book, you could adapt it without needing to like the viewers to be Discworld fans who have tons of prior context. Yeah, yeah. Cool. And I think it's just a really important story. So if you like, I know you're not as interested in screenwriting and stuff, but if you could like point to something and say, I want like a perfect adaptation of that.

Reefer Man, probably. Yeah. Somehow done in the style of the cover, isn't that animation? Like just with that vibe. Just the vibe, yeah. I like that. I like that idea. I have a lot less detail in my head than you,

but just like, yeah, vibe. Yeah, I definitely don't have any planned out screenplays or anything. Certainly not that you have time for before you write the novel I want to write and read. Thank you. Yes, the completely normal novel that I'm working on that doesn't involve anyone dating Gingerbread Frankenstein. Don't give away the spoiler.

I didn't say whether or not the dating goes well. Cool. What happens now? Where are we now? I think we are going to take an interval. Okay, cool. That's the plan. I remember to pour another glass of wine before we started. Oh, see, I think the failure of wine being poured is that. That's true. Let's just move the...

Definitely don't have a bottle sat next to me. Yes, we are back. Right. We should probably remember that we've got listeners that we need to be paying attention to. Mm-hmm. We've got questions. We do. There are questions there. Shall we answer questions from the live chat first and then go to our pre-given?

Yes. Yes. We'll do that. Marvelous. So, somebody has asked, what do you think grown up Eric is doing? Hmm, that's a good question. I like that question. I think he is a professor in something that delights in mansplaining other subjects to women he meets at the pub. Oh, my god, I love that. I was also gonna say like some form of teacher. But I like to imagine he like couldn't get in with teaching at the Unseen University. So

he's ended up like say teaching at one of the girls. Oh, no, Quirm ladies college, but he's like that one teacher everyone hates. And this kind of keep him so the girls have like a focus of hatred. Yeah, yeah, nothing unites girls like a common enemy. Yes! That's what girls need, common enemy. And I'll tell you what, Sybil's paper aeroplane's been coming along splendidly since she had somebody to aim them at.

It's like that one thing we have in all girls school and a male teacher, like either everyone fancies him or he is like the worst and he is the enemy and I feel like he's the enemy kind. That's certainly what I've gotten from the various media I've consumed. I don't think either of us have attended an all girls' school. Actually been to an all girls' school. God, it was bad enough coming out bisexual at Catholic school. Imagine if I come out as non-binary at an all girls' school. That would have gone so well. Well, especially back when we were at school. Literally nonsense to everybody there, I expect. Very true. Craig Arson is best Scottish accent, I'm sure. Hindsight is a wonderful teacher.

Would you do the scale of project again? And also, by the way, what's with the iron brew? Outside of the West Coast of Scotland? No one drinks that shit. I'll answer that one first. I did not have enough girders in my diet. Yeah, that's fair. Now I'm drinking Girda supplement. Now I dislike the taste. Sorry. Jack likes Dandelion and Burdock. I don't agree with that. Root beer. Oh, I like root beer. Root beer tastes like medicine. Yeah, but like in small doses like a root beer float is a wonderful thing. No, it's not. Oh, gosh. No, I was so disappointed when I tried it. This first

time I tried root beer. I tried root beer flavor. Like this is cow fall. I was expecting it to be more like cream soda. Oh, yeah. Just in my head. Anyway, what was the sensible bit of the question? Oh, sorry. Hindsight is a wonderful teacher. Would you do this scale of project again? Okay. I'm assuming then with like with our knowledge now being five years.

Yes. But I would streamline it more from the beginning. Yeah. I somehow wrangle you into accepting that we couldn't record for three hours and then edit it down to one and a half. Yeah, I think I came quite close to quitting early on. That's fair. But yeah, I think it would be easier. Yeah. With the knowledge we have now, I think the scale of the project would be a lot easier to manage because it did get easier as it went on. Also like this is feels like it is very much the biggest project I've ever completed.

And I wouldn't change that for the world. Like having done something. Yeah. And it was a good time in our lives to be doing it. Yeah, it was really an unexpectedly had more free time than we would have done. I wasn't working as many hours as I am now. You were then you weren't. Yeah, then I suddenly wasn't working at all. Yay, furlough. Yeah, and not just like doing this project because I needed it in that time period. Obviously, it was a massive help through lockdown, which we talked about a lot. But also, yeah, I just I know I'm really proud of having done this thing. This is way bigger than even like the books I've written, which were also huge, terrifying projects. Yeah, no, it's good. Yes, we would do it again.

CHARLEYY Yes. William asks, do you think you'll try out the new Discworld RPG? CHARLEYY Yeah, probably. CHARLEYY I'm assuming it's the more diffused one. I think we will at some point. I didn't do the Kickstarter in the end. I figured I'd acquire sort of when it's out, out. Because I didn't want to feel committed to finding a time to do it. So I think it's on the to-do list for both of us. CHARLEYY Yeah, we're gonna have to... Do you know how many people is the ideal amount to play? because I didn't want to feel committed to finding a time to do it. So I think it's on the to-do list for both of us. Yeah, we're going to have to...

Do you know how many people is the ideal amount to play? No, I haven't looked at it enough yet, but I think we can get a group together. And we maybe will have some guest stars on the podcast as we attempt a little live stream or something. Oh, my gosh. We'll critical roll it, we won't. We'll do something. We'll do something. We'll do something. We might go set up like a tripod and camera or something.

Yeah, we may try and like film it or record us playing it in some way because I feel like that would be entertaining. I'm not actually great with tabletop RPGs. I haven't played a lot of them. No, I played D&D for a while. That's it. My partner is a big TTRPG nerd and knows enough about Discworld that I'd be quite happy to play and run a game. Nice, nice. Okay, we'll do that then. Speaking of if people are into playing tabletop RPGs and want to make some nerdy friends to play them with, I know we've got a few people in our Discord who sort of like to try and get games together every now and then. So join our Discord and try and do stuff together, it's fun.

And eventually I might even join in one. So, they've all happened at times where I've not been free. Yeah. Yes, you have to really arrange with Joanna. Yeah. For someone who doesn't technically have a real job, I am very hard to pin down. I'm so busy and important. It's like a wicket. Charlie asks, earlier Francine said something about being the nice one, one episode. Do you think you have a good cop, bad cop dynamic? It changes. I think it varies book to book.

Yeah. I think, and also mood to mood. I think generally when one of us is clearly in a very bad mood, the other overcompensates to meet it or compensates rather than overcompensates. And so I've definitely edited episodes where I've been the chipper one. And I've been just furious to be here and vice versa. I think on the whole, Joannaanne has been more generous with things. I think sometimes, yeah. You've definitely prefaced more things with this is coming from a place of love, but it's

a possibility you're more cautious. Yeah, quite possibly. I don't think we do in real life. I think I'm sometimes the bitch year of the two of us. Yeah. I'll tell you what, it probably comes across that way to people who don't know us because you are a lot more gregarious naturally and I have a chronic case of resting bitch face. Yeah, that's true. I remember at one point when we'd both hang out with Mark and I think it was the first time the two of us had hung out with him in person, he sort of realized that there was a, not the dynamic he thought he was. And so something along the lines of that I was actually the bitchier one and he thought you might have

been or something like that. This was a while ago. Lovely. My favorite picture possibly of that entire year is me, you and Mark after we did the live show in Bury the day after. And you two are hung over the shit. And obviously I wasn't. And it's just a selfie of the three of us in a coffee garden, coffee shop garden. Me looking like a normal happy person on a Saturday and you two looking like you wanted to die. I love that picture. Wonderful picture. Especially contrasted with the picture from the night before we're all three of us on stage and I looked furious. I wasn't.

Yeah, no, that was just an unfortunate angle. No, I think I just look that way, honestly. I've learned. But I think it served me well. I think it stopped the amount of bullshit I might have had to put up with from other people. Yeah, that's true. I mean, I would rather have resting bitch face than what I do have, which I've been reliably informed is resting sweet hamster face. Yeah, people do feel like they can push it with you in a way they don't with me. Yeah, I struggle with that. I need to make my face sterner.

Draw your eyebrows on angry. There's too much eyebrow already for me to start drawing any on, Francine. Joanna, you can never have too much eyebrow. That is very true. We realised that a long time ago. I can always be gayer and with more eyebrows. Always needs to be gayer and with more eyebrows. Apparently Mark has responded to the competition between he and Hogfather for third host and

has said that both himself and Hogfather are woefully unqualified. That's fair enough. Yeah, that is fair. Artemis in the Discord has asked if there was any book you could completely forget to reread for the first time, which book would it be? Any book of the Discworld or any book of the Anybooks? It hasn't specified so I think we can do a disc world and a non-disc world answer oh okay um my non-disc world answer i have ready uh and it is uh the Hitchhiker's Guide to the

Galaxy as i think i've said before and for once my answer isn't changing because the first time i read that i read the bit about hanging in the sky much in the same way Brick doesn't i just hanging in the sky much in the same way Brick doesn't. Bricks didn't. I just died. That's fair. I just, yeah. Something in me, appreciating comedy changed a little bit. Yeah, that's fair. And I think it set me up well for a life of appreciating practice. How about you?

For a non-disclod answer, to be fair, I agree on the Hitchhiker's Guide one. I would love to read those for the first time again. But for a non-comedy answer, I'm going to go with The Night Circus by Erin Morgenstern, which I've already talked about on the podcast a ton. It's one of my all-time favourite books. It's the book I read whenever I want to write fiction because it just puts my brain into the right headspace. It's quite a divisive book because it's more vibes than plot, but I love it. I adore it. I think it's wonderfully written. I'd love to experience reading it for the first time again. Yeah. If I was going non-comedy, I might go Day of the Triffids or something like that.

Yeah. It's one of the ones I've read so many times, I'd be interested to read it again for the first time. Yeah. So it's Day of the Triffids, weirdly, is almost my comfort read. My Deathqld answer? That's a hard one, isn't it? Maybe, okay, if I was rereading it for the first time now, I think maybe Nightwatch because I think it would hit me a lot harder. Now I'm more politically aware than I was as a teenager or whenever I first read it.

Yeah. Who are you typing at? The chat. Oh, okay. I said The Night Circus by Erin Morgenstern very quickly. So I'm just going to... Who are you typing at? The chat. Oh, okay. I said The Night Circus by Erin Morgenstern very quickly, so I'm just going to type it in there. Yeah, fun fact listeners, I actually slow down Joanna's audio if I have several set up for it. It makes it incredibly difficult to edit.

There have been episodes where I've like over caffeinated myself and when I listen back before we release it, I keep having to check that I don't have it on two times speed. Once or twice I've had to speed or tried to speed up our promo clips by a tiny bit back when we could only have a minute or less. Yeah, yeah. And I had to stop, I did it and then I was like, we are talking at the maximum allowable speed. I can't speed this up anymore. I'm just gonna have to cut a bit of this. Yeah. That is unfortunately our way, especially when caffeinated. I blame all the Gilmore Girls we watched when we lived together. Absolutely. That did something to our

brain. Also, we have large plates of unrelated foods in front of us at all times. Well, yeah, that we never actually are seeing each other. No, we kind of pick up and sit down again. Just leaving restaurants without paying full plates of food. Walking to coffee shops demanding coffee in a kind of aggressively flirty way. Anyway. Never going to school. Welcome to the True Show, Make You Fret, a podcast where we now are watching and recapping every episode of Gilmore Girls. I can't make Francine do that. Wait, can I make you do that?

I really want to do that. I might get a couple with you. Can we do a Gilmore Girls. I can't make Francine do that. Oh wait, can I make you do that? I really want to do that. I might do a couple with you. Can we do a Gilmore Girls podcast? Not all of it. Okay, no, that's fair. You can do, tell you what, find someone else to do a Gilmore Girls podcast with and I'll very happily guess it on some episodes. Okay, fine. If anyone listening wants to do a Gilmore Girls podcast with me, shout. Please bear in mind Joanna has now had more than one glass of wine so I may take this back.

No, not at all. I really want to do a Gilmore Girls podcast. I know you do actually. That would not be a doubtful thing for me. Has nothing to do with the fact that next year I'll be promoting a book about teen dramas that I wrote, which has a chapter about the Gilmore Girls. Welcome to Promo Corner. Welcome to Promo Corner. I've got a pretty something I can promote. Friends and the Golden Nature of the... no I can't reach the box of books that's out to do with it. This is an entertaining addition to the show.

Friends and the Golden Nature of the sitcom by Joanna Hagan, available now from all good book retailers. The webcam is refusing to cooperate. There we go, if I replace my face with the book. This makes amazing content for people who are just listening to this. We are not editing any of this out. No, I don't have the time. Right, someone's just suggested The Girls Shall Make Ye Fret by, so I think now we have to do it.

Nice choice really. The girls and theys make ye fret. Anyway. The girls make us fret. The girls and they make you fret. Anyway, sorry. The girls make us fret. The girls make us fret. The Gilmore girls make us fret. I do fret about the Gilmore girls. Thank you, Charlie, for recommending my book.

Discworld book, if I could forget and reread for the first time. I said this would be my answer to more than one question, but again, it is gonna be Monstrous Regiment. The devil you say. Because by the time I read it, I said this would be my answer to more than one question, but again, it is going to be Monstrous Regiment. The devil you say. Because by the time I read it, I was already figuring out, no, not the first time, but the first time I read it, I hadn't figured out a lot of gender stuff about myself. So

I felt like reading it for the first time, but now I know the gender things about myself would be a very interesting experience. Because I think it would be, instead of pointing and going, why do I feel like that might be me, I can just, would could experience it and point it and go, oh, hey, there's me. And I feel like that would be a really nice experience. Yeah. Yeah. Do you think you might get a little bit of like, you know, when you listen to or read something on a topic you know a lot about, though, and you feel a bit of frustration because you can't enter a dialogue with the author or the podcaster or whatever it is. I could feel a bit of that. Yeah, that could maybe happen.

Still worth doing. Cool. Right, we're going to go to listener questions that we've been sent ahead of time. But if you have any more questions for us, please keep putting them in the chat as we go along or in the Discord in the events and gatherings channel. Shell has asked if you go anywhere on the Discord, where would you go? Who would you go with? Or who would you meet there? Who would you take with you not from that region? And then what would you do there? Okay. Do you want to go first on this? Do you have an answer? Yes. All right, you can start then because my answer is still a bit vague. Okay.

Subtle. Okay. So I would like to go to Gnarly Ground with my dog. That's the person not from the region. And I think I would like to meet Magra there and we would go on a nice walk. I think she would be a nice companion on a walk through gnarly ground. She's been there before. She's slightly less intimidating than the other witches and we'll just go on a nice dog walk together through gnarly ground and try not to fall in any ravines.

Wonderful. I love that. As I try on every walk. Not to fall in ravines. There's not a lot of ravines around here so I imagine you do quite well. The chances are low but never zero.'s that chalk pit, I walk near. Well, there is there. There are several chalk pits in Suffolk. It is quite a chalk pitty place.

Chalk popped. I would like to go to Querm because I quite fancy a nice seaside holiday, including a trip to the zoo. I would like to meet up with acting Captain Haddock while he's on his work trip there. Because Haddock is my favorite, never really does much character. He's like one of my favorite side characters. I don't know why I'm always delighted when I'm with Hattick. I'm just going to chill out with Haddock. Yeah, I'm going to chill out with Haddock. Unsurprisingly, I'm bringing Nanny Og because

I just really want to hang out with Nanny org. This is going to the pub rather than coffee shop though. I want to go to the pub with Haddock and nanny org on the beach. Pub on the beach. Beachside pub. Beachside pubs, when they are nice, are very, very nice. And when they are bad, they are awful. Yeah. They are awful. Well, I'm thinking because we're in Querm, it'll be have that sort of pub cafe, little tables outside overlooking the sea. We won't visit the zoo because I'm thinking because we're in Quirm, it'll be have that sort of pub cafe, tables outside overlooking the sea. We won't visit the zoo because I'm not sure I trust Nanny Organa Zoo. No.

No, she's upset the animals by singing her songs. Yeah, especially if Grebo joins. Craig in the chat has just asked, PD is on stage tonight and can we say hi? And hi, PD. I think we said hi already, but just in case, hi again. Because PD is one of our longest listeners, I think. One of our longest listeners and moderates the Discord. And does a very good job. We really appreciate you. Yeah, we would not have made a Discord if someone hadn't volunteered to moderate it. What do we have next? We have two questions from Jeffrey.

Do you have a favourite moment from all of the past episodes? Well, hard to say. I wish I'd gotten further into my realist and then two or three episodes or wherever I got to because this is a good opportunity to really stress how weird it is to have like whatever it is, 400 hours of us talking on the internet and to have little to no recollection of most of it. However, I will say I did enjoy failing to summon a demon. I enjoyed you agreeing to eat garlic sausage in bed with red boots on. And then following through, I did make that video. Yep. And then just listening back in general, because I listened to bits and pieces here and there, I perversely really enjoy

listening to you stoically try to keep us on track when my brain is off in another galaxy that day. And I'm going to recommend for anybody who'd like a very good example of that episode 66, Carpet People part one brackets F5 to pay respects. Starting at where did I start in the link I sent you? Let's see if I can find it. I could have had that open, couldn't I? Yeah, Francine sent this to me earlier so I'd have context for this conversation. About 40 to 41 minutes in. Yeah, about 41 minutes. Yeah, start there. The next five minutes also is a very good example of what I mean.

In your defense, because you sent me that earlier so that I could have context for this conversation. I started the horse cockpit and I'm giving listeners no further context. But it's all the rest of it. And it carries on for the rest of the episode. It does. I was clearly not willing to cooperate and I thank you for putting up with me for so long. Weirdly I have quite a lot of fun doing those episodes. The problem is if I end up like wandering massively off topic I have like this associated sense of guilt of oh god, Francine's gonna have to edit this but I don't have that if you've wandered massively off topic.

Which means I can sort of just delight in it a little bit. Yeah yeah so we got a good cop ADHD cop on those days. it a little bit. Yeah, yeah. So we got a good cop ADHD cop on those days. But it's also sort of how our friendship works and we both have to occasionally reign each other in like things when I say, oh, I'm going to buy a loom or a bird. A loom or a bird and or. Get rid of that and. Second question from Jeffrey, as you make your grand entrance on the stage. You didn't answer. Oh, did I not answer? Oh, sorry. I got distracted by the giant horsecock.

Joanna, there are children. Well, it's after 9pm at this point, they're listening at their own risk. Sorry, it's the Vorbis is the eagle moment, which is from our Small Gods episode and it is just the best example of you flailing wildly going full-court broad and string. I had a nice day. You are one of the only people who can make me proper cry with laughter and that one I genuinely just could not breathe and the more I couldn't say anything, like the madder you got, some of the most fun I've ever had recording an episode of the podcast.

I felt very similarly when you misspelled desert as desert several times. I can't be trusted on that one. It's midnight in the desert. That was one where we could not get through the summary of the episode because I kept fucking it up. Yeah, yeah. Leave it on your hand. What?

Spot on your hand or my screen? Oh, it's a bit of gum from my headphones. Oh yeah, mine are finally disintegrating too. Five years for very cheap headphones. Good stuff. They're much better than the fancy good headphones that I tried to switch to at one point. Yeah. Yeah. Right, sorry. Second question from Jeffrey. As you make your grand entrance on the stage

for your show, and I'm assuming this is just sort of a metaphysical vibe, not like we're doing an actual show, because our actual grand entrance was just us wearing technology. Metaphorical? Yeah, that too. Well, both. What's your entrance music? I'm going to go with the thieving magpie. Oh, I like that. I just think it's, well, everybody likes it, I think. Do you know what, I'm just assuming that really, I suppose. I don't really know if everybody likes it. It's upbeat without

being kind of, I don't know, high stakes. I feel like some songs would be too, like you'd feel you have to be a certain way. Oh, yeah, that's true. I mean, the overture, by the way. Yeah, obviously. See, for me, I want to really draw out the entrance. At walking slow mo or like? No, like I want the music to start a long time before I actually come on stage. Okay, so you've got time for a cigarette.

Yeah. So I'm specifically going with one of my favorite pieces of music of all time. Music we used to use to cure hangovers when I worked in a pub, which is Tchaikovsky's 1812 Overture. Not Sgt. Peff's lonely dubstep. Although that one works too. No. More cannons. Tchaikovsky's 1812 Overture. We both went a bit more high brow than I expected.

I did also consider a couple of Queen songs like Don't Stop Me Now is obviously a really good one. I feel like I could make an excellent entrance to Radio Gaga. I like Killer Queen. Killer Queen is a very good one. It's not appropriate but I love it. No. There was another one I thought of and it's completely left my brain. Maybe something from Marina. Oh yeah. There's a couple of good Marina and the Diamond songs I feel like could do the trick.

Yeah. I feel like if I was... Tell us yours. Tell us yours and tell us if you think that we have any specific very good entrance music. But I just like the idea of walking onto cannons. I feel like if I'm making an entrance then there should be cannons. I agree. In fairness, yeah. More things. Also I watched Viva Vendetta at an impressionable age and...

Stakes with you. ...which is really burned on me now. That way you shaved your head. age and which is really burned on me now. Sorry, we have another one. That way you shave your head. Look, it's not unconnected. But actually, I shaved my head because of This Is England. And the fact that my media studies, we were watching This Is England in media studies, and my teacher bet me 20 quid, I wouldn't shave my head. I meant the second time. Oh, no, the second time was just a mental breakdown.

Okay, cool. The third time. Oh no, the second time was just a mental breakdown. Okay, cool. The third time. It's not yet happened, but we look forward to seeing what causes it. I came really close this summer and it was just because it was hot. It was hot. Only for a bit though, so I'm glad you didn't. I'm very glad I didn't. It's taken me like a week of hot.

It's taken me nearly five years to grow this out. I'm not shaving it now. Yeah, and it's all unleashed out. You've got lovely hair now. I do. A couple more from the YouTube chat. Wolverine has said, I'm currently making my way through the podcast and I've just seasonally passed the Hogfather episodes. Can I get a shout out to my future self when I come back around to this? So yes, for however long it takes. Hi, Wolverine.

Hello again, Wolverine. Oh, sorry, it's Wullavine. Wullavine. I read that as Wolverine. I think maybe that was intended. Quite possibly. By the way, earlier during the interval, somebody had looked up this channel because they'd re-re-listened part one of The Wintersmith and just stumbled onto the live stream. Fantastic.

Yeah. Yeah, I think that's some kind of weird probability glitch. Yeah, there's definitely a glitch in the matrix there. Charlie said 20 quid is too cheap to shave your head. To be fair, this was back in, I don't want to talk about how long ago this was because I don't want to think about how long ago I was 16. It's also when you're 16, 20 quid is a lot of money. It's 20 quid was a lot of money when I was 16.

I mean, at the time that was more than four pints. Yeah. Yeah. That was a lot of money when I was 16. At the time, that was more than four pints. Yeah. Yeah. That was a night out. We did nights out on less. We once did a night out on five quid between three of us. That we didn't buy actually. No, we didn't. I walked up the barman's back in my heels. Live joiner. I can't edit this. I don't mind the listeners knowing that story. There are still children listening though.

I don't mind the listeners knowing that story. There are still children listening though. Don't do as I did. Ickleweed asks, if you were Discworld witches, what flavor of witch would you be and what would you specialize in? Where did that come from? Ickleweed in the YouTube chat. Oh, okay, cool. I think I'd probably end up being a bit of a research witch, probably which probably more along the lines of the previous Fairy Godmother than of Magret. I'd like to think I'd have a little more common sense. I'd like to think that Magret would like to think, wouldn't she? Yeah. I'm probably more like Magret than I'd like to be. I feel like there's a bit of Magret in this.

Hair included, almost. Oh, Ben from Pratchat has joined the... Hi Ben! Hi Ben off of Pratchat. Everyone, if you want an ongoing Discworld podcast to listen to and you haven't yet, go and listen to Pratchat, our Australian counterparts. We can go back and listen to all of the episodes we've been avoiding from the latter bit of the Discworld series. we've been avoiding from like the latter bit of the... Yeah, I had almost... We both had the sort of policy of not listening to episodes on books that we hadn't covered yet. I have broken that rule a couple of times.

I have, yeah. Yeah. And when Joanne Robinson was on Desert Island Discworld doing Winter Smith, I listened to that, but we were two years off doing Winter Smith, so that felt safe. But yeah, no, I would have maybe said research witch, but I think honestly I'd have gone fairy godmother. I'm not a fairy godmother, but I would have done the good godmother route. I think we just picked the same thing here, but different. Well, no, she was a fairy godmother, but she was also a research witch. Okay, yeah. I wouldn't have liked the fairy godmother bit, yeah.

Yeah, see, I would have fun with that. We can job share. We can job share, yeah. You do the research, I'll do the godmothering. Yeah. Yeah, see, I would have fun with that. We can job share. We can job share. Yeah, you do the research, I'll do the godmothering. You know how much I enjoy going, oh, you need a spectacular outfit. Well. Bippity boppity ball gown. Here's my dressing up box as a wardrobe.

Yeah, bippity boppity ball gown. I feel like I could pull off bippity boppity ball gown. And there's always something a bit campy. I've been in dere Cinderella since I was tiny. I rewatched it at some point in the last 10 years because I watched the live action one when it came out and that made me want to go back and watch the animated one. Live action one, gorgeous costuming. Just stunning outfits. I think that seems to be the best thing about these live Disney remakes. Yeah, but I just rewatched all of Once Upon a Time and some of the outfits and that were much better than some of the live Disney remakes,

especially when it comes to Beauty and the Beast. Have we got any other questions there? We have some more listener questions. Oh, Ben just said, don't tell the other podcast, but you're my favorite, Pratchett, you're our favorite. We did once have a great, we had guested on a couple of sort of, we did a couple of crossover episodes with Pratchett, but they were Ben and Liz's episodes, it was Pratchett episodes that we'd guested on. I did have a sort of, we must have them on ours and very much the flavour of a middle class couple feeling like, oh God, we must have them to dinner, they've had us to dinner. Did you send them a note?

We'd done a thank you note if we sent flowers. Tamsin asks, what is your festive drink of choice? These days it's mulled apple juice really, or hot chocolate if it's during the day. I love a hot chocolate. For those who still drink though, I'm going to recommend the much maligned Southern Comfort and Lemonade as a festive drink. Because I used to love that. Granted, the last time I drank it was in my early 20s and did not have what you would call a refined palate. Are you typing ways to get me sectioned?

No, no. I wouldn't call Southern Comfort and Lemonade particularly festive though. I don't think of that as a Christmas drink. It is a nice drink. It is what I used to drink around Christmas though. Oh, that's fair. Largely because John, the barman at the nutshell at the time, used to massively overpour it if I had a hangover. Oh yeah, he was really great for that. RIP John, you did not care about storm control. And related to the southern comfort.

Yeah, no. He was not killed for overpouring. He was just very good with that. My festive drink of choice, I've gone off mulled things. Not a muller this year. Not been mulled. I did some mulled cider. So I always make my mulled cider non-alcoholic. You've had my mulled cider. I've had my mulled cider. It's very nice. In fact, I'm going to pick that rather than apple juice if I can just pick one. But if I'm making it at home, it's my it's apple juice because yeah, I don't know. I use a mix of apple juice and low alcohol cider and I did some of that while I was decorating

and that was lovely. Because my partner had been given some honey Jack Daniels, which is disgusting, but a bit of that in the mulled cider did really well. Like a little hot toddy. Yeah, that was that sort of vibe. But yeah, no, I don't mind a mold thing, but I've kind of gone off it a bit this year. I'm going to sound really bougie now that my main festive drink of choice is champagne. Do you put a little creme de cassis? Do you go straight up? I do like a Ceraillol every now and then, but generally champagne I'll drink straight

and then if I'm doing anything cocktail-y with it, I'll use Prosecco instead. So I'll do like by Bux Fizz, I use Prosecco and Clementine Juice because I'm pretentious. Can you drink that? Yeah, it's specifically like orange juice. Franceri, context for listeners. Franceri never does that brand name. I had some random allergy flare-ups since the last time I had COVID and I can't drink orange juice from concentrate. But again, sounding bougie, Waitrose, Ombra and Clementine juice doesn't have whatever causes an allergic reaction. So that's my Bucks fizz. But that, I'd love a French 75, but I'll generally make that with Prosecco or Carver. But champagne, I

like to drink. Yeah. Sorry, chat. By the way, I've always wanted to say that, like address chat, not always, but in the last year or so since I've become aware of that being a thing. Do you know that's a thing now apparently, like kids, teenage kids just like talk to the invisible audience, they go chat this and that, which I think, you know, it's a little bit maligned from some of the people I've heard talking about it. I think it's a little bit ancient Greek. There is a little bit of ancient Greek too.

Yeah, right. That's an interesting one. No, I'm very aware of that. I have a nine-year-old nephew who's recently got his first phone and got really into Fortnite. I'm very aware of things like saying chat. I know more about Fortnite than I think I ever needed to know. I'm going to start hitting him if he keeps saying bruh because it's become like, I know IOVUs like he's using bruh to punctuate every sentence. My sister threatened to make him wear a bruh on a set if he keeps saying it though, which I really support as a parenting choice. Like you've become what we raged against, aren't you?

Oh yeah, no, I know. The filler word. I know. The filler word, police. But I'm allowed. She does not care. I know. I'm a rejuvenating hypocrite. Has that not been established on the five years of this podcast?

Or do you edit those bits out? I was in the car with one of my colleagues the other day when we were listening to Fatlet, if I, whoever did that. Sun 41. Sun 41, thank you. And just, you know, the, I don't want to waste my time. My time, become another casualty of society. Yeah.

We're just sitting that on the way back to the fucking office, just look at each other right now, never mind. Trust. I felt all this year. And I asked my brother-in-law what my sister wanted for Christmas and he said, the Green Day American Idiot 20th Anniversary Boxer. Oh, fuck off. And then to make it worse, I was with my 19-year-old ex-step kid and I was ordering the box set

and I said, I was explaining to my 19-year-old step kid, I was, yeah, that I was thinking about taking the discs out of it and gifting to them to my sister separately because my uncle used to buy our CDs but take the CDs out to rip the music off them first and would sometimes just post us empty CD cases. And then the 19 year old asked me what ripping the music off CDs was. So yeah, I'm decrepit. I believe it's the term. But with a bow. But with a bow.

But with a bow, with a festive bow. Anyway, Tamsin also wants, so just to say- I'm sorry, yeah, what are we? I'm a bit of a crisis on the podcast. Charlie has brought some Frangelico this season as a special winter drink, and it comes in the shape of a monk, and now I feel like I might need to treat myself to that

just for the bottle. Try a Frangelico. Yeah, might try a Frangelico. Tamsin also asks, do you think you can mull scumble? Not without proper protective clothing. I do think PPE is required. You have more experience with health and safety documentation than I do. So I will. We'd have to do a risk assessment on that. And I'm not gonna lie.

I think it needs to be in an open space. The thing is with scumble, right? The thing about scumble. The thing about scumble, lads. Sorry, as well as doing the addressing chat thing, I'm still looking at the screen. I've got the chat open whenever I address it. So the great chorus is there for me. That's there for me. So that's fun. It's off on both directions. Okay, so we're on the stage. We've got some chorus on either side. And the croaking frogs. The thing is scumble is mostly apples. Do we think of it as like one of those dangerously strong ciders? Or do we think of it more as like a calvadosi like apple based brandy? The former I can mull. Yeah, I can mull that. I can mull anything apple, apple-ish.

Apple-ish. If it's the latter, then I would add it into something already mould. Yeah, my uncle makes mould wine a bit like that, as in he makes mould wine and then adds it to a large brandy. I put brandy in my mould wine. I make it the way I was taught to make it, which is you make it cheaper by putting in a shitload of cheap orange juice, but then you add a bottle of brandy so that it's still very alcoholic. Matt in the chat, it rhymes, says that heating scumble might be a rather risky business and actually do you know what, neither of us are very good at chemistry.

Yeah, I think maybe. Maybe we'd get somebody specialist in to do this, because it does need trying for science. I mean, the thing, why I'm not a chemist. I know how to set. That's something really offensive about chemistry. No, I've set brandy on fire intentionally quite a lot in cooking. Oh, on the, yeah. Yeah, yeah.

I set shots on fire on the bar. Yeah, I've done that too. I'd never drunk a flaming shot actually. I must have done at some point. I need to work on some of the bars. Okay, I don't remember ever drinking a flaming shot. That doesn't mean I never did. But yeah, no, I've set Brandy on fire in cooking.

You drank Absinthe for me and Jim? No, I didn't. I don't do Absinthe. I'm a very strict no Absinthe rule. You watched me drink his flage. Yeah, I did. I've got very few rules when it comes to me and drinking, but no Absinthe is one of them and no Gin in the mornings. I think it's become clear that I didn't really miss out by quitting as early as I did. No, I really didn't.

PeeDee asked, favorite Hogswatch joke? The worse the better. Oh, you didn't put that bit in. Oh, sorry. I thought that was just sort of implied. Well, luckily, they are all very bad. They are all very bad. So I'll go, why does the Hogfather come in through the chimney? Why does the Hogfather come in through the chimney? Why does the hog father come in through the chimney? Because it soots him.

Oh, that is terrible. I love it. My favorite Christmas joke isn't even really a joke so much as my brain is rotted. Cool. But I can't see... Try and express that. I can't see let it snow without reading it as let it snow and having a quiet giggle to myself and by a quiet giggle to myself, I mean my partner finds it funny as well. So now we say it out loud and go let it snow.

Do you have to say it in a French accent? As best as it said in a French accent. Oh, now it's weird again. Okay. I mean, nonsensical again. Yeah. That too. Loxair has asked, if you haven't done it already, now that the series has been completed, top five books and what's your favorite non-disc world friendship book? Okay, cool. I was kind of hoping this would come to me as we were going. So I'm going to hastily improvise the last two on this list. Cool. It's like, you know, when you can't decide on a menu, you wait till the wait comes around.

Yeah, yeah. And then you just pick whichever one jumps out you first. So in no particular order, I think we have done it reasonably recently, but I feel like because it changes every time, that's fine. Yeah. So no particular order. Reef of Man, obviously. Nightwatch. Yep. Which is abroad, which I think might be vying with Reef of Man's top spot now. Good old Witch is abroad. Gonna say Small Gods. Gotta still be up there. And so hard to pick the last one. Am I still gonna put the last continent in my top five? I think I probably am. I think I probably am. Just the bad taste that man. Genuinely one of my favorite lines in anything. The weird thing about having done this podcast is I now associate the books with not only the episodes we did, but the various times

of my life. I was not having a good time when we did Last Continent. And so I think less fun theatre than I did. So I'm going to have to reread it at some point reasonably soon. That's what that's like. Some of my bias against Eric is because I was like having such a rough time when we recorded it. Some of it's just because it's not a great book. Yeah, it wasn't a good combo though. Bad timing. Horrible parrot. But one of our I think joint favourite moments of the podcast does come from Eric and that was the summoning of demon. Yeah. Yeah. How about your top five?

Yeah, I didn't plan a list ahead of time because I'm going very much for in the moment why currently the second feel is my top five and again, in no particular order. But Amazing Morris, Monstrous Regiment unsurprisingly is also an answer. The Fifth Elephant is between four witches representation is between witches abroad and Carpe Juculam but I'm going to go Carpe Juculam because I've died on that hill many times. And then Soul Music, soul music is always in there. And then come back to life. And then come back to life. Nobody properly beheaded you. Sorry, Karen. Soul music?

Carfait Juggulam is the best witch's book and I'm staying on that hill. I'm not dying on it. Despite being shouted down by a literal audience. I got shouted down by a literal audience at the Discworld convention this year and still- I won. I don't care if you won. Carfey Jugulum is the best witches book. I'm not dying on that hill. You literally couldn't even decide on that a second ago and you dug your heels as soon as you realized it was a conversation. I always think it's the best one. It's just

not always my favorite one. Witches Abroad is really closely tied. I feel like Witches Abroad just hasn't. Oh, because of your bias towards fairy tales. Yeah, no, deep obsession there. But no, I'm putting Carpetshark in. I'm not dying on the hill. I'm thriving on the hill. Thriving. You're thriving on that hill, are you? I am thriving on that gnarly ground. Thank you very much. Fuck me. I'm glad this didn't come up till after we'd finished the main run. Front scene mates we're now. We're never speaking to each other again. You're not coming around

for coffee tomorrow anymore are you? I was about to say other again. You're not coming around for coffee tomorrow. I was about to say till tomorrow. I'm coming around it too. Okay, cool. Oh, yeah. And soul music is always on that list because it was my introduction to Discworld proper. This podcast would not exist if more years ago than I care to admit, a bum and threw a copy of soul music at my face. What? No, it was no. Yeah The other one, yeah. Yeah. I don't think we're really betraying any op circuit.

No, no, it's fine. You didn't pick a fifth one, did you? No, there was five. Both of them? Monstrous Regiment, no, Monstrous Regiment, Amazing Morris, Carpe Diagulum. Soul Music. Soul Music. Oh God, I didn't pick a fifth.

Oh, Fifth Elephant. No, Fifth Elephant was in it. Oh, sorry, I didn't pick a fifth. Oh, Fifth Elephant. No, Fifth Elephant was in there. Oh, sorry. Yes, yes. Fifth Elephant. Fifth Elephant. The gloomy trousers of Uncle Vanya.

So gloomy. So gloomy. So close to my crotch. As I say, so close to your heart. The high gloomy trousers of Uncle Vanya. I imagine them to be fairly. The sort of pulled up to the armpits trousers. Absolutely.

That's what we like. And any more questions from the YouTube? Oh, sufficiently agitated. What is your favorite less bad adaptation? Cartoon slash TV adaptation. Okay, good. I think we can pick a favorite. The favorite slash less bad because obviously I'm not a huge fan of any of them. I mean, for me, Hogfather. I thought it was pretty good. Yeah, no same. Yeah.

Going post was good too, but I liked Hogfather, just because it's charming. I think Hogfather is like the- Some of the depth of the book, but I think that was always going to be the case. But it has a lot of it in there. I think it's the most like devotedly accurate adaptation. And it's still appealing enough.

I've shown that to non-Discworld fans, and they have really enjoyed watching it. Yeah. I think it is hard to properly put across the feeling of the blood on the snow and passages in any kind of visual media because you need it in your head. You need to associate it with your own fears. That's very true. But still pretty good. And least favourite remains soul music, I assume. Oh yeah, no, of course.

Yeah, that's fair. Hogfather is still my favorite. I think least favorite is probably and I tried worked really hard to defend it when we covered it. But it is probably the Colorimetric adaptation. Because David Jason and Tim Curry is both just very poor casting choices. Actors, we like them both. Just wrong for those. I think what bugs me so much about the Color of Magic adaptation is Trymon being a villain, he sets up this big Pratchett theme of the bureaucratic villain. It's such a good thing that Pratchett takes and takes and it becomes the auditors and he does all this cool stuff with it. And taking that away from the story is very upsetting to me. I think unless anyone on YouTube wants to throw us any more questions, I think that is-

We have which non-disc world book? Oh, I forgot that one. For me, I think it honestly might be The Long Earth, which we haven't covered yet, but it's been so long since I've read it. I don't want to completely thrive on that hill. Yeah. You hate it so much, don't you? I hate it so much. I can see you dying inside every time you say it.

I'm not very good at poker face. It's Nation. Like, it's the best one. It's such a good book. It's an amazing book. It is probably the best one. But I love a bit of, you know me, I love a bit of fucking parallel universe shit. I'm kind of I am kind of with you on really enjoying I love a bit of fucking parallel universe shit. I'm kind of, I am kind of with you on really enjoying Long Earth, but it's been so long since I've revisited it either. I think we are possibly talking about it. Okay, well, when we cover it. Yeah, we will come back to this question.

We will. Like compare it a little bit to Nation. Yeah. Cause I think that's probably the only non-disc world bipartite shit we've not covered. That can't be right, can it? Apart from some of the- We haven't done the short- We haven't done all of the short stories.

No. There's some stuff we could definitely revisit in a bit more depth than we have, but I think that's the main non-disclosive thing we haven't covered. Yeah, definitely the main one, yeah. Yeah. I will go honorable mention to the Johnny books as well, especially- Yeah, they are fantastic. ... and You Can Save Mankind.

They are amazing. Yeah, yeah. Like really, and I don't want to say surprisingly well done because it's Pratchett, but I was shocked by just how good every bit. I feel like also as well, just in case Mark is listening to this and shouting at us that we should honourable mention Dodger, which I know is Mark Burroughs favourite of the non-disq well books. Yeah, it's not my...

It's a great book. It's good. Yeah. We could honourable mention all of them. They're all good books. Yeah. So by the way, I've got this list of books. Yeah. See our episodes on.

What do I got here? Oh, by the way, we haven't, what we haven't talked about on the podcast is, oh my god, the literal hammer on top of this. Whoops. Why have you got a literal hammer? Because I was putting a picture up. Oh, okay. That makes sense. The designing Terry Pratchett Discworld. Oh, yeah, the new one that came out. We haven't had a chance to.

This is so good, guys. Yeah. Specifically the William Morris fit, which now I'm not going to be able to find even though I've had it open for... We will be talking about that on the podcast properly at some point. This is Paul Kibbe's new whole book about doing all the artwork for Discord with lots of beautiful artwork in it. But the timing has just not worked out to talk about it yet. Look at this. Look at this. This isn't what I was looking for. Look at him. It is so good. You need to put it in front of your face, Francie. I can't do it. It's a very good book. Remember, we are putting this out as audio content as well, though,

as if I haven't already been very obnoxious. Well, I said the title of the book first, so now listeners can find the book and guess which page I was holding up to the camera. What a delight. What a fun game. We have one more question from Charlie. What question have we not asked that you would have asked if you were in our position? I feel like I covered that with the little interview questions we did for each other. I like that question. I always ask that at the end of an interview with somebody. Yeah. What do you want to be asked? What would I want to be asked? We've got another question from Daniel. We can always end a couple of other

questions. We can circle back around. Daniel said, we've obviously said our favourite Terry Pratchett podcast. Can we both suggest a non Terry Pratchett one? Hang on. Let me get my... Well, obviously it's no such thing as a fish for me. Yeah, well, my main one. But we're now pulling up our podcast apps. I feel like I mentioned that so, so often that it's a kind of a cheat. If you like hearing about comedy writing, the rule of three. And it's such a great podcast.

Very good. I just re listened to the one on the Rule of Three. And it's such a great podcast. I just re-listened to the one on the meaning of left. Which is one of my favorite things to have ever existed. Also, one of the co-hosts of Rule of Three has just written a very good book about comedy writing called Be Funny or Die, which I highly recommend. I haven't read that book yet still. Have you not? Do you have a copy? No, I don't know. I did the because it was on unbound. So I did the sort of pre order.

Nice. Yeah. The if you want fiction, the Magnus archives. Yep. I will say I've not finished the Magnus protocol. I'm not as invested. I feel as better as a binge. I need to do like three or four episodes a time of protocol. Or Old Gods Vepalature. If you want something completely out of left field, I forgot the bloody name of it. What's it called? Welcome. No, not welcome to Night Vale, something else. It is. Oh, God, I hate that. I'm live. Can't remember it. Oh, help me. It's fine. This

is Brancheberg. Oh. It's a, I can't really explain it. Just go and listen to it. That's fair. I found that through recommendation of one of my old favorite podcasts, which was Do by Friday, which we mentioned quite a lot in our first few episodes. Men, why must you constantly let us down? Heather Miedema Men, why must you constantly let us down?

If you like media content stuff, obviously you've listened to quite a lot of Ringer podcasts. For those who know, Joanna Robinson started working at the Ringer and she's my favorite media podcaster. But the specific one I'll recommend is Trial by Content, which is Joanna Robinson, Dave Gonzalez, and Neil Miller. They pick a topic and debate it every week. So just episodes they've done recently. Best 90s technology movie is a very fun one I'm listening to at the at the moment. The worst digital resurrection. The most iconic moment of the Lord of the Rings movies was a very fun debate. So yeah, I highly recommend that one. You have an opinion on the most iconic moment of the Lord of the Rings movie?

I think it didn't win but AON's I Am No Man. Surprise listeners, this is where we start our Lord of the Rings podcast. Right, so anyway, sorry, can we do that? As much as I'm really, really upset that I've sprained my ankle and I've had to cancel most of my Christmas plans, I definitely have time to rewatch all of the extended editions over Christmas now and that's happening. I can't wait. How many times have you watched those? Jesus Christ. It's really fun to binge them. If you're hanging out with someone else and they're also a nerd and you can shout along

and very excitedly turn to each other at a moment and go, did you know? He broke his toes. You would hate it. You would hate every second of it. I'm so sorry. I want to be the person. Yeah. What else? Oh, maintenance phase is something I recommend a lot for debunking. It's really good for arguments if you actually want to turn around and say, ah, but maintenance phase is very educational for debunking diet culture. Private Eye podcast, page 94, if you want to make some politics stuff. I was about to go into just the whole Michael Hobbs podcasting universe. If books could

kill and you're wrong about, also great. Yeah, especially the early you're wrong about when it was like, I hadn't listened to any of those debunking podcasts yet. Yeah. I'd be remiss if I didn't also mention You're Dead to Me, considering that's done a lot of the historical research for us across the years we've been doing this podcast. I have definitely used that. Yeah, all of these. I think at some point I put together a list of podcasts with just going into the pandemic. I was like, hey, here's some things you might want to listen

to. Maybe we should do that again. We'll put it on the website or something. Yeah, the Folklands podcast, Tim Downey, who you might recognise as Gail from Baldur's Gate or oh god, what's his name? The Mr. Brown Chairman of the Wickbur Street Shopkeepers Association of Good Omens and Justin Chubb. Two iconic roles. Keepers Association of Good Omens and Justin Chubb. It's a very, very cool folklore podcast. They're also very specific to our interest in an interesting episode called The Lore of the Playground where they worked with people who work with the OP archive, as in Peter and Iona OP who did the Oxford Dictionary of nursery rhymes. I haven't listened to anything for ages.

I will say as well one of my favourite things about, it's really really cool when people post like their Spotify raps and stuff and we're high up on their list of podcasts, that's really cool, but one of my favourite things is the amount of people who have sent us that and a bunch of other podcasts that either I listen to or you listen to or both are also in that list. It makes me feel like I'm in... Have you ever had a look at our Spotify, like our podcaster Spotify route. No, I completely forgot about it. Did we have fun stats? Yeah, we did. Yeah. I've forgotten them all now, but I'll... I should have posted them on social media, but I was otherwise engaged.

That is fair. And also I still don't have the login information on social media. No, that's fair. I'm not intentionally keeping it from you. I'm just very forgetful. Well, I need to ask you when you're actually on your computer and I never do. To be fair, most of it's only logged in on my phone. Oh, even better. Yeah. Have we got any other questions? I think most of it is response to our podcasting conversation. Yeah, I think we had to, we said we were going to circle back to what would we ask ourselves, do you think of anything?

I can't think of anything. I feel like we talk about the inside baseball so much that Yeah, especially in an episode like this. I think it's Jemana, where did you get all those hats you wore for the year of the podcast where you wore hats all the time? I just have them. Yeah.

I don't have a better answer for that. I just have a lot of hats. I've acquired them throughout my years. That's not where they came from. Why are you asking questions? Why would you ask me about this? I bought some storage baskets to go on top of my wardrobe for all my hats and there are two baskets of hats plus some drawers with more hats in and headbands. Francine, why don't you have more hats?

I look bad in them. Ah, that's fair. I'm sorry. I have one or two hats that I look all right in. And one of them is a beanie. That has to be a very specific kind of beanie. Yeah. And one of them is some hat. So that's for all seasons. For two seasons. For two seasons.

For the two seasons that matter hat wise. Yeah, in transitional seasons, Francine unfortunately has to go hatless. It is a sad affliction. Especially when I'm trying to thrive on a hill, which get very windy. Right. I think that's all of the questions. I think that's all of the things. And we have been, oh, we've just got one more. Now you've completed the books, what's your suggested starting points for new to disband readers? We did do a whole episode on this. We did, but we hadn't completed the books in that point. Yes. Whatever my answer was, it's probably that but I'm going to say something different now. I think you should start with more. I didn't say

more last time. It is the most popular one to say. Yep. And I think, you know, if I'm being realistic and not trying to come up with another answer, Mort for most people is probably the one to go with. I think Mort is one of the most accessible ones to prefer. Weird Sisters is fit for Shakespeare nerd. Yep. Guards, guards if somebody's not very into fantasy.

Yeah, and likes like crime stuff. Yeah, little sneaky way in. There's only one dragon. Don't worry about it. It's fine. I think I stand by it. I'm just going to keep, I'm just doing it so I can answer that again. Monstrous regimen.

Genuinely, I think it's a good like inroad because it stands alone so well. So I would give that to anyone who has complicated feelings about gender. It is very difficult because you always want to tailor a recommendation to whoever you're recommending to. So if I'm going for a generic, I know nothing about this person, I'm going to say, start with Color of Magic. Because it's fun seeing the series grow and it's a bunch of really short, silly things. If you do really hate Color of Magic, you aren't really going to enjoy the rest of the Discworld. Starting with a different book wouldn't change that. I wouldn't recommend your partner start with Color of Magic because I wouldn't expect your partner to ever really get into Discworld or enjoy it. But that wouldn't change with whichever book he started on.

No. Yeah. No. Or. No. Or if you're a barman, throw a copy of Soul Music at a 17-year-old's face and you never know what kind of podcast could exist a certain amount of years later. Do not do that. And would you do anything, this is a good last one from Ben, would you do anything differently if you were starting the podcast today? Uh, I mean, that's something we, we touched on a bit already, be more organized and streamline

how we put it together. No, I think that's probably it. I think apart from that. Yeah, I'm happy with the work we've done. I think there are certain episodes that I wish were done at different points, just because I didn't put as much into them as I'd have wanted to, because of life things. But then that's- Off the top of my head, I'm not sure which they are really. I mean, The Last Continent, I'm not

sure that was ever going to be a very research heavy one, but I don't feel like I did it justice, just in my general attitude. It's like my school report. No, that's fair. There were some books I went into fairly unenthusiastic as well. The Last Constant might have been one of them. I remember it not being one of my favorites. So I think that didn't help that we couldn't quite do the good cop ADHD cop relationship. We'd sometimes do a couple of last stragglers and then we will stop. Daniel asking for context to this barman throwing a book at my face. There's no real context. He said, you'll like this and threw the book at my face. There's no real context. He said you'll like this and threw the book at my face.

We used to read in the bubble up. Yeah, we did read in the bubble up. Oh, and if we could join a guild, which would it be? Which one would you join? Oh, good question. I've said I think the clown school would fix me. I don't think the fool's guild would fix me. I don't thrive under that kind of strict regime. I think I might join, I don't know, I've forgotten what girls that are, artists, I can't say it. Artisans. I don't think I can join it.

Artificers. Oh, artificers. I can say it, it's fine. That's the first test. Artificers. I'm not sure what I'm going to artifices yet, but I just feel like it's a nice respectable profession. I can see you artificing. Yeah. Oh, I'm going disrespectful. I'm joining the Seamstresses Guild. I'm very good at darling. Darling.

But it does cost extra. So we're going to sort of answer a question. I've broken Francine. So now I've done that we're gonna sort of answer a question that has been asked a lot over the last year or year or so. Which is what next? What is next? Now? Later? Later, much later, we are having a hiatus. We have earned a hiatus. We are taking a proper holiday. We've not had longer than I think like a month or so's break really since we started in the last five years. So we do have a plan. Don't worry. A plan is well sort of is a bit of a plan in place. You're going to panic, look in my eyes. Do we? I've got one. I just haven't shown you the spreadsheet yet. It's incredible. It crosses dimensions. But it's a surprise. It is a surprise. What I will tell you, dear listeners, is that

our hiatus will be three months and we will be returning in April. Yes. Not with quite the regularity we've had. We are not going to be necessarily doing three episodes a month because we do have more live stuff than when we started this podcast. We need to balance things a bit more carefully. I feel like there's probably a higher proportion of patrons in the live chat than there would be and you know, percentage wise and that. So we'll say now, there are going to be a couple of three more bits coming out like this month. And then we are going to do like a little pause on the Patreon thing. Yep. Which means that you'll still be able to see

everything, you'll be able to even like any new stuff we put up and new patrons can join for like a month fee or something like that. But current patrons won't be paying monthly. So you don't want to unsubscribe to our Patreon. We will also... You can subscribe, yeah, or you pay for one month's worth and that'll give you access to the entire backlog. But current patrons won't be charged. If anyone new signs up in those three months, you'll only be charged for a month. And we will send out, you'll still get emails if we publish anything on Patreon. So we'll send out an email before we turn it back on so no one gets an unexpected charge. But we may be restructuring how it all works slightly, although we're not going to be suddenly doing a massive price hike against your way. No, no, no. Yes, nothing like that.

We're not worth that much money. Right. Not without the darning, darling. I think that's everything we have to say about Hogs' Swatch. I think it is. I think it is. We are now getting to the point where, as I said at the start of this episode, at about two hours, I start refusing to stay on the subject. Not that I've done fantastically tonight. There was no chance.

I've enjoyed it very much. Thank you all for joining us, by the way. Thank you so much, live audience. I'm so glad so many of you came. Also, I spotted some of you saying very nice things about the fact that we've done five years of podcasts and we're ignoring that so we don't have emotions. Yeah, no, we're trying really hard

not to get emotional on the pod. I got used to saying that without cringing every time, didn't I? You just cringed. You just cringed, haven't you? Sorry? Well, I know, but I became self-aware for a second. It's fine.

Oh, let's not do that. No, no, no. Right, let's not do that. Right. Okay. Yeah. So that's everything we're going to say. As we've said, we will be back in April. Thank you so much to the live audience that joined us. Thank you to everyone who was listening afterwards. Keep hanging out in the Discord. We'll be there. We will still be in the Discord. We're never really offline. Never really offline. That until we return, dear listeners, you can join our Discord, there'll be a link down below and we'll put one in the YouTube chat in a second. You can follow us on Instagram at the true show make you frat on Twitter and blue sky at make you frat pod on

Facebook at the true show make you frat join us on Reddit r slash TTSNYF. Email us your thoughts, queries, castles, snacks, pointless albatrosses and all sorts of festive treats, the truesharemakeyfretpod at gmail.com. And we've just explained what's happening with Patreon. But if you do want to head there and set up to support us financially, go to patreon.com forward slash the truesharemakeyfret and exchange your hard-earned pennies for all sorts of bonus nonsense. And until we return, dear listeners, don't let us detain you. That was nowhere we were ever going to say that in unison. No, absolutely not. Everyone at home now.

Did we check how to stop being live? No, I just assumed I'd keep pressing things till it happened really. Right, okay. Listeners, I'm going to kind of, I found a stop livestream button, so I'm going to head off fairly abruptly, but I think we'll still be able to be in the chat. Bye. Bye. Bye.