The Tucker Carlson Show - Roseanne Barr

Episode Date: March 23, 2024

Roseanne turns out to be a very deep person Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This has probably happened to you every couple months or so. You look up from what you're doing, otherwise occupied, feeding the dog or paying your power bill, and you look up and they'll be trying once again to make Roseanne Barr be quiet. Shut up, Roseanne Barr! You're a Nazi! You're crazy! It's not working. Roseanne Barr has been in the public eye for almost 40 years, and amazingly, she's more influential than ever. So we thought we would check in with her and see how she's doing. Roseanne Barr, how are you? I'm great, Tucker. How are you?

You're obviously unbowed. I can't remember where I was the other day, and someone was like, Roseanne Barr's a Nazi. She's an anti-Semite. I'm thinking, you can probably criticize her. Probably not a Nazi or an anti-Semite. Probably not. Probably not.

So they canceled, famously, they canceled the resurgence of your show, the relaunch of your show. Just like you, when it was number one. Hey, don't their shareholders wonder why they would do that? I don't know how that spooky finance stuff works. I don't either. I've still got some questions, I will say that. Did you figure out, like I did, that it's really personal?

Oh, it's always personal. The thing about television is everything's personal on TV. Yeah, it's really personal. Oh, it's always personal. The thing about television is everything's personal on TV. Yes, it is. Yeah, it's about you. Yeah. So that's great when everyone's like, oh, you're Jesus. But it's not so good when they're like, you're fired. I don't take any of it personally, thank heaven.

But you get fired in this very, very public way, become the center of the national debate over Trump. But you don't go away. And then all of a sudden, sudden look up and you're everywhere. How did that happen? I don't know how it happened. I really don't. Did you expect to be doing this at this stage of your life?

No. I, no. Well, I guess when I was really little, I saw myself doing something that was going to be, have good consequences to it. And so anyways, this week I was like, hey, this is like when you were little and now you're doing it. It was one of those minutes where you go, thank you, God. Because I do feel like God puts me where he wants me.

I mean, I'll tell you all that later. No, tell me what. I go like, hey, I'm a lady citizen journalist for my old age. Hell, that's great. It is. It's great because, you know, I love that, oh, no, I can't remember her name, but that one that used to interview everybody in the 50s, she had her own show and she did the greatest interviews.

I'm so stupid I can't remember her name. Check that lady out. Lady in the 50s who used to interview people. She had a great interview show. Anyway, but I like being a citizen journalist. Like, you know, like you're a real journalist, you know. But you're also a writer, which astounds me because we never see that anywhere. I mean, you are such a great writer.

So I want to talk to you about that. And I look forward to doing that. But you are such a great writer because I have so much to say. I want to say it like this. Let me think. I. I'm a much to say. I want to say it like this. Let me think. I'm a deeply religious Jew, which is why they call me a Nazi and anti-Semite, and a racist,

and a transphobe, and whatever, a Zionist baby killer. They call me everything. And before that, when I was on the left, the right used to... But they're the same, I guess. It's all the same people. They're playing different parts.

They just call me a cow, a Hulk, you know, destroying the American dream, man-hater. You know, they're always throwing stuff at me, and none of it was ever true. But I had a lip to all that gauntlet of hate since I first showed up. Sorry, we haven't answered your question. It's Arlene Francis.

No, not Arlene. She was good, though. Barbara Walters? Not Barbara Walters. I knew her. She was good, though, with Anwar Sadat, wasn't she? No. No.

She was kind of an ugly little woman with brown hair. Okay, so an ugly little woman with brown hair. Okay, so an ugly little woman with brown hair. Faye Emerson? No. Wendy Berry? No. Check Google ugly little woman with brown hair 1950s. The greatest interview.

May Brussels. Thank you, God. May Brussels. Was this on Salt Lake City stations? Yeah, my dad used to watch it. Okay. And he'd say, this woman has integrity. You know, my dad used to watch it. Okay. And he'd say, this woman has integrity. You know, my dad used to decode media for me.

Yes. Because he wanted to be a comedian. So he always showed me how comedy works. And, you know, anyway. Oh, my God, I can't even focus my mind. But anyway. So you said you're a deeply religious Jew. Yeah.

And since I was three years old, I wrote it in my third book called Rose Anarchy. I had a conversation going with God. I wrote it in my book. You know how little kids have an imaginary friend? Yes. Well, mine was God. It's kind of weird. You chose wisely.

Yeah, because that's how we studied. It was an Orthodox Jewish family. And so that was my friend. And I talked to him when I would read and study. I wanted to know everything about it, you know, and I would talk to him. And he'd always answer this in my book. I said, how come you could solve every problem on earth? All you got to do is just wiggle your little finger and you can stop all these problems.

Why can't you do that? All you have to do is wiggle your finger. Because I was a suffering child. Yes. And he said to me, because I don't have fingers, Roseanne, but you do. And he said,

and you should be very proud of that opposable thumb that I put on that hand of yours, because now you can really get busy helping a lot of people and trying to make things right, and he always gave me the answer that I knew God would give me. He didn't ever go, yeah, go get them. Yeah, they're wrong in their religion. He didn't never say none of that. So I knew it was him, you know. So he told me all the time, go over here and do this and go over there and do that. Just trust me on this. And I did that my whole life with the exception of a few marriages that really effed me up. But then I got rid of those guys and continued on the path I was supposed to go on.

Did you not ask for guidance on the marriages? You know, I didn't listen. It wasn't God's fault. Yeah, he told me, but I go, I'm putting you on hold. I got some physical business that you don't want to know about. Do you think he knew? Well, yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. But it wasn't anything. I was married, so it wasn't anything bad. Right. I mean, except for that it was horrible sex. Which, you know, people should not have sex. That's one way that we can fix the world right now. Does people stop having sex?

Yes, absolutely. That's a tough one. I know. It's harder than quitting smoking or something. I know. Unless you're married and you can take care of the kids that are going to be a result of it. Yes. Right?

Isn't that common sense? I strongly agree. That's why I tell these young women, you know, don't worry about them overthrowing Roe v. Wade. For one, I tell to my nieces that are all liberals, you don't have to worry about that. You rushed out to get the vaccine. You're never going to get pregnant.

You ain't going to have no baby. Don't even worry about it. Right? You must be their favorite aunt. You're sterile. Don't worry. Yeah. How do they respond?

They get really mad. They never laugh. That's the thing about fascists that I found in my life. Fascists, they don't like laughter and they don't like discussion. Yes. Them are the two things they hate the most. They might be on the right and they might be on the left. But if they can't laugh at their self or anything

and they can't discuss civilly with someone that they disagree with, they gotta go. They gotta move aside because it's a whole new world now. Because we got citizen journalists.

And we have journalists such as yourself with a conscience who care about this country and what it means and how we have to do everything we can to save it at this late, late date. Late date. For all of us, hello. Yes.

And stop buying in the bullshit. You know, I said that to introduce the POTUS, the deep state bullshit. Well, actually, it's funny you mention that. We have that clip. Really? Yes. Oh. Roseanne Barr, this is your life.

Here you are. Aren't we all fed up with the deep state bullshit? And the bullshit. We want Trump, the Magador, to kill that goddamn bull. In the bullshit, kill that goddamn bull. Okay. Now, I just put the political analysis on hold for two seconds. You're obviously enjoying that amendment.

Oh, it was so fun. It was so awesome. You know, it's always fun to make people laugh and, you know, come alive. So, I think even if, like, you didn't like Trump and you weren't going to vote for Trump, you'd look at that and be like, that looks like a pretty good time. Oh, no, I wouldn't do it if I were. Oh, of course. I don't mean you, but how could anyone watch that?

You're wearing a cowboy hat. Yeah, I swiped it off a guy. You did? And they didn't have the mic, so I had to stand on my tiptoes, which, you know, I could barely reach the mic. But, yeah, I swiped this hat off a guy. And, you know, I didn't like how my hair looked don't you like how my hair you know i cut my own hair with toenail clippers it took me four

days but i cut it hair by hair because i was so sick of it but yeah yeah of course in the mirror. I'm not crazy. Did anyone see you do it? No. I was in a room by myself. But I loved it, and I had spent a lovely week down there at Mar-a-Lago. It was so awesome, and I just loved it. What do you think of Trump the guy? You know him, obviously. What do you think of him? Well, as I always say, he's the only guy in my Hollywood career that ever returned a favor. He's the only one who ever returned a favor and gave me back more than I had given him. I think he has such integrity. I think he's like me a lot. He tries to be funny, and he is really funny.

Yeah, he is. The guy's really funny. He's got great timing, and I laugh. So you've known him a long time. We all laugh. I mean, we all think he's funny. No frills? Delivers.

Get groceries delivered to your door from No Frills with PC Express. Shop online and get $15 in PC Optimum Points on your first five orders. Shop now at nofrails.ca. Whether it's a family member, friend, or furry companion joining your summer road trip, enjoy the peace of mind that comes with Volvo's legendary safety. During Volvo Discover Days, enjoy limited time savings as you make plans to cruise through Muskoka or down Toronto's bustling streets. From now until June 30th, lease a 2025 Volvo XC60 from 1.74% and save up to $4,000.

Conditions apply. Visit your GTA Volvo retailer or go to volvocars.ca for full details. What favor did he return? or go to volvocars.ca for full details. What favorite did he return? Well, you know, I did, I was doing my, I think it was my second or third HBO special, stand-up special, and, you know, I always wait till the last minute, you know.

So anyway. What, to write it? Yeah. Ooh. Yeah, it's bad. Because I can't, unless I'm in a panic, I can't write. Well, To write it? Yeah. Ooh. Yeah. Yeah. It's bad. Because I can't, unless I'm in a panic, I can't write. I know what you mean. You know what I mean?

Oh, I just, yes. Yes. Yes. Unless all that chemical panic kicks in, my brain doesn't function well. Yeah. When I'm. Unless you're running from a bear, you don't run fast. Yeah, that's exactly it.

Hello. Oh, that reminds me of the best joke my dad told me, but I'll save that. But I'll tell you after about the running from a bear. What are we talking about? Talking about when you first met Trump, you're doing your HBO special. Oh, no, that isn't when I first met him, but he let me film it at Trump, New Jersey. What's that called? Atlantic City. Atlantic City, yeah. And not only that, but he drove me out in his Packard on stage. He drove me out in his Packard, got out and escorted me to the microphone, which was so lovely.

Because my second special, I did it as a has-been who's coming back. Yes. And, oh, oh my god did they hate that i i got sued by every single casino in the world that had to give them back all the money because it was when i got really famous after my first hbo special and so my second one i thought it would be really funny to come back and be a failed diva, kind of like really prophetic, like it is now, and go, when I went to rehab, you know, I say I was injured. I was thrown off a horse while making National Velvet, and my doctor prescribed crack, and I had all this stuff, but then I went to rehab. I didn't really want to go, but my publicist said it would help my comeback.

And it was that kind of thing. And then, like, I watched Barbra Streisand's One Voice. She did this concert in her backyard where she charged all of Hollywood something like $10,000 to come in her backyard and watch her. And I did her act word for word because it was the greatest thing any entertainer's ever done. I never thought I'd ever sing in public again. But then again, no, she goes like this.

I could never imagine myself singing in public again. But then, again, I could never imagine the possibility of nuclear winter. She actually said that. And so I did it, you know. But she wasn't kidding. No, she wasn't kidding. Do you know her? Not kidding. A little bit. She's deeply serious about what she says. She's just been in a bubble for far too long. Yes. She needs to go. I know, I never was in a bubble. Like I say, even though I was very much in a bubble in my own family. I lived in Salt Lake City, Utah. We were Jews in Salt Lake.

So my joke, we stuck out like a sore thumb in that town because we only had the one mother. So that, but. Wait, but your family, as I remember, you were Jews in Salt Lake City, Jews in a Mormon state selling Catholic religious icons or something like that? Yeah. Yeah, my dad and grandpa, they sold pictures,

3D pictures of Jesus to our Mexican neighbors, and they'd get $2 on welfare payday. We had to go knock on the door and get the two dollars on welfare payday we were on welfare too but you know so it was handy to live in the neighborhood where you were selling the pictures but they were like this I was a little girl and it was Jesus like this with his arms out so nice and blonde and everything And then when you took two steps, he's crucified. And I used to go through that room like, oh, it added to my PTSD. Oh, did they keep the pictures in the house? Yeah, because I had like two rooms. So they stacked around the, you know, walls there.

It's not your average childhood. It's not your average childhood. I was always a stranger in a strange land, but it gave me a unique perspective, and God gave me a unique perspective. Like he was talking to me today, he's like, Roseanne, have you noticed what a gift I've given you by putting you in your lifetime to be alive in a world where the jokes just write themselves. And I go, I'm grateful. Thank you. Because they do.

Oh, yeah. It's just perfect for me. It's just perfect. So you're enjoying it, like things are collapsing, but you're enjoying it. But like you, like Virginia Woolf said, the job of the writer is to put the severed parts together, you know, to create the clear picture for the viewer or the reader. That's what you do, too. So you know exactly what I'm talking about. How fun is it to put those parts together? And, you know, those two wires have never gone together, never been allowed to go together. And they just start a frigging huge, one spark sets the whole woods on fire, you know.

We're seeing it. We're seeing people go, wow, I've been lied to my whole life, every day. So what about the people that you worked with for so many years in the entertainment business? Are any of them coming to these conclusions? No, I don't think so. But, you know, once you're in that bubble, the bubble of show

business or whatever bubble it is, your little secret society or club, you don't never come out of it. You gotta walk out like Egypt, like the Jews in Egypt. If you're not gonna leave Egypt, you're going to know what's beyond it, you know. And two-thirds of the Jews, the Israelites, tribes, they didn't want to leave slavery. They had to be forced to leave slavery. So that's how it is. So people that are, like, able to still laugh and think and put severed parts together and get a clear picture are very needed now.

And, you know, I'm praying that it will expand ever more so with the things that are coming out in the news. But they do try to hide the news on the news. The news is to hide the news, you know. I've noticed. Yeah. So this whole... The sin is to tell the truth yeah that's what you're punished for in a world of lies that the truth is seen as um i can't remember how that thing goes the truth is seen as the truth is the only crime yeah that's so where so you've been on the road with trump you're at that rally in florida where do you see that going for him? Do you think he's going to win?

I don't know. It seems, of course, I want that to happen. But then when you get on Twitter or any of those social media things, you know where everybody is paid to lie. Yeah I saw it happening on Facebook a million years ago. I saw all of this my whole life. I was raised in an apartment house with survivors from Auschwitz, and I always knew it would come here because it always goes everywhere. And it's a virus.

And I see people in the streets repeating Nazi slogans that they don't even know come from the Nazis yeah I've seen it my whole life and I do think Trump is the anti-Hitler even though Hillary says he's the Hitler Hitler. But I mean that one is amazing isn't it? How they use the reversal and the mirror image. Yes. As they lock up, as they use the judicial system to persecute their opponent legally, and they make up these fake attorney general lawsuits that don't even have a victim, like Letitia James, who's seen as a civil rights worker or something, abuse the law to that point and allow no jury? I mean, it's just so terrifying to me as a Jewish American.

And that that's allowed and that the press honks it up. You know, if they just honk it up, crank it up, we got to keep this going. We got a lot of people to divide and get hating on each other, which is why I came back to television. I didn't want them to do this because I know where it leads. What starts with the Jews doesn't end with the Jews. The Jews are just the convenient canary in the coal mine,

you know, because a lot of people don't like us. And, you know, there's a lot of reasons they don't when you've got names like Epstein, Weinstein, Blinken, people that are like, you know, yelling. People that are like on the side of against the American taxpayer, for God's sake. Soros, Kissinger. I can name a ton of them. And like I say in my act, just because a very sizable portion of our people are horrible fucking people, please don't hold us all to that.

But, you know, it's embarrassing. And then they're the ones calling me an anti-Semite. But they didn't stick up for me when I said the Iran deal was an existential threat to Israel in so many words in the captioning of a meme during a three-month conversation about the Muslim Brotherhood in Egypt, Iran, and the United States. Nobody Jewish stuck up for me because I'm a Nazi, because I like Trump. And why do I like Trump? Because Trump understands the Jewish people, and we owe a deep debt of gratitude to him for that. And that is why myself and my mother, who is a lifelong Democrat, unbelievably also loves Trump.

Really? That's a minor miracle right there, buddy. Yeah, because she finally saw what the Iran deal is really about. And so she can't vote Democrat ever again at age 90. This episode is brought to you by DAZN. For the first time ever, the 32 best soccer clubs from across the world are coming together to decide who the undisputed champions of the world are in the FIFA Club World Cup. The world's best players, Messi, Haaland, Kane, and more are all taking part. And you can watch every match for free on DAZN starting on June 14th and running until July 13th. Sign up now at DAZN.com slash FIFA.

That's D-A-Z-N dot com slash FIFA. Oh, excuse me. Why are you walking so close behind me? Well, you're a tall guy. You throw a decent shadow when I'm walking in it to keep out of this bright sun. It hurts my eyes. Okay, well, you know what?

With Specsavers, you can get two pairs of glasses from $149. And, oh, you'll like this. One can be a pair of prescription sunglasses. Sounds great. Where's the nearest store? Not far. Come on. Let's hurry then. To my count. One, two, one, two, one, two. Visit Specsavers.ca for details.

Pardon my ignorance. I mean, I watched this happen. I knew some of the people involved in it, but I never really understood what the Iran deal is about. Well, it's about what just happened in Israel on October 7th. That's what it's about, in shorthand. They unleashed a… Remember in the movie Planet of the Apes? Yes. Where they went after all the human beings who could read? They didn't even think they could talk,

but they feared they might be able to talk. So all those militarized beings, like in Star Wars, came and beat down and locked those people in cages, the human beings, in the movie Planet of the Apes, which was written by Rod Serling and was actually a movie about Nazi Germany and the Jews. So that was the reference I used in my tweet. But, you know, you kind of have to have a sort of a certain historical vantage point

to understand that I was saying that, which they lack in Hollywood. Yes. vantage point to understand that I was saying that which they lack in Hollywood yes because all they are is we want a woman we want a woman we want this skin tone because they're fetishists care nothing for our Republic our way of life our constitutional republic which people have laid their lives down for for decades. I've seen it for seven decades. People have laid their lives down for that. And then they go about talking what's American, and it makes me sick when they say save our democracy. Well, democracy isn't burning down cities, okay? Democracy, and forget that word, because that means mob rule,

but the heart of America, we keep being denied to see the real Americans, the heroes of America. I see them, though, because everywhere I go I see them. Those are the people that those nurses say, those nurses and doctors that, you know, refused to go along. Those brave people in our armed forces who were kicked out because they understood that no government,

least of all this one, has the right to force untested drugs on a captive population because that's nothing but fascism and Hitlerism and Nazism and Stalinism all mixed together. Because you know this is exactly what Hitler would be like if he had computers. That's what we're living in. And now we got artificial intelligence where they're going to recreate people's lives using artificial intelligence for their movies. So nobody's even gonna have a right to their own life story. They'll steal everybody's life story. It's so horrible

and it's like I feel like it's 99% sewed up, you know. I don't know if this is the end of the world. It looks like it to me. Have you asked God about that? Well, like I told my son, I don't really give a damn because I'll die my way out of it. But you all have to deal with it. But here's the good news that this is what I want to say.

And I know you care. In the Torah, it says that the 99% of this world is just physical. And it's that 1% that matters. So I think that 1% is the one they can't factor in because they don't know what it is. They don't got it. But we do. And that's the 1% that is where all wars are decided and won and lost. That's God.

So I just invite people to pray with me and pray themselves in their own words, not by rote, not by prayers they've already heard, but in their own words, that we, because I know we do have the power of spirit together to make this all stop and change it. I know we can do it. I just wish other people would know that too. I did it in my life from a real low point. Let myself, gave myself permission to believe. I guess that's it. Gave myself permission to connect and believe and walk in. To do what I believe.

To walk in my, I don't know what you call it. Just to say what, to live what I say I believe. To actually believe it and then live it. It's pretty amazing and it's transformative. How do you feel different now that you've done that? Well, I first did it in 1999 because I saw this all coming, you know. Because I always, everyone says I'm, you know, they got all these mental illness things for it. But really, I just found a safe place inside myself that was connected to God at a young age. You know, it's a relationship. I don't know what you call it.

But I just, like, have been walking deeply with my God for a long, long time, and I gave myself. I gave myself. I'm like, well, you know, she don't matter. I'm just... I just want to be all in for America. I want to be all in for the United States of America because this is where my family would have died

if they didn't get here. And I saw that my whole life as a child. They would be dead, and I never would have been born if they didn't have an America. I want it to be here for... ever. I do too. I know you do.

I do. You spend a lot of time in Hawaii. I haven't been back in a year since I went on that Fox deal. You know, I was doing that Fox deal. That was January 6th, a couple years back when I was going to come do that special. Yeah. So I moved to Texas December 5th and started working on my act.

Talking about waiting until the last minute. But I haven't been back in Hawaii since then. So, I mean, you haven't been there since the fires? No, they happened on another island. Yeah, not the one you live on. Yeah, they happened in Lahaina. Lahainatown. What was that? Oh my god. Honestly, I feel I feel that they target

certain populations. They don't like anybody that has a direct connection to their sacred ground. I think it has a lot to do with October 7th also. They don't like the people to live above their sacred ground and their sacred ancestors either. Because, you know, they might be able to put up a hotel there, for crying out loud. Them people, they're nothing but useless eaters. And, you know, they're a bunch of Bible clingers and gun toters and despicables or deportables, whatever she called it. Yeah. And, you know, they're just in the way. And then they bring out Oprah.

You get $700, and you get $700, and you get $700. You know, it's just part of it. And nothing has been done for them. Is that a criticism of Oprah? Because I don't know that we're allowed to do that. No. No, it's not. I'm just, yeah, it is, because it was just, oh, my God. Yeah, it was an attack on the Hawaiian people,

and that's something that's very meaningful to me, too. When I went to Hawaii, I always, I won't even go into that. But, yeah, they haven't done nothing. They're moving a lot of those people from Lahaina over to my island now, over to Big Island, and putting them in Hilo. That's a war crime, in my opinion. But they're after every tribal people, if you notice, that have oil under them or a place where they can put a 15-minute smart city

or a place where they can put a 15-minute smart city or a place where they can have a pipeline. They don't like people that are connected to the earth. I've noticed. By ancestry. That's all a bunch of crap they read in their old books that say we aren't supposed to be able to have sex with kids. In short. In short. In short.

Last question. Do you see... That's maybe the greatest summary I've heard in a long time. Thank you. Did you hear my other one? I said it to Dinesh D'Souza. Obamaism. Obamaism.

Obamaism. I like that. Thank you. You think Obama's behind all this? Of course. Duh. He said it himself. All I need is an old sock puppet upstairs

so I can sit down here in the basement and do what I do best, dropping bombs on people and droning them and, you know, getting richer. He's the richest president we've ever had. People don't even know that. They don't know Lolo Satoro co-founded Halliburton with the Bush family. Did you know that?

No. Uh-huh. Yeah. Okay, what else did you want to ask me? You were going to ask me something. I don't know. No, it's true. I guess I'll end with this tell us the bear joke

from your oh let's see if i can remember it correctly uh oh this guy's telling the guy oh i was in the woods the other day hunting and a bear come at me and he started chasing me and oh i was running uh you know i run up a tree to get away from him by god the bear comes up after me so I have to jump out of the tree and run and I see a little creek there so I run across the creek because I think he'll lose my scent you know in the water but hell no he comes across the water he's up there and he's got me up against a barrel of hay there and oh I just shit my pants and the guy goes well I would have shit my pants too if the bear was on me like that.

And the guy goes, oh no, not then, just now. I shit my pants. Your father told you that? Yeah. How old were you when he told you that? Eight. That's one of his good ones. Do you ever have any home movies from-

Oh, I got so many home movies. When I said, Daddy, how come Santa Claus don't come to our house like he does all the neighbor kids when I was just little? Because Santa Claus hates the Jews. So I couldn't be no other way than this. Rosanna, it's wonderful to see you. It's so wonderful to see you.

And I know probably next week or the week after they're going to try and shut you down again, but I don't think it's going to work. Well, I'm just all about God now and preaching the gospel from the Torah. And I'm going to tell everybody, if they don't start repenting, they're going straight to hell.

That's what I feel like I was born to do. You know how Trump says he's been preparing his whole life for this fight, so I'll buy. I feel that about myself. I think you may be onto something there. People, they need to look inside and straighten up their own life and stop blaming Jews and anybody else. That's my message. And the old books tell you you can't touch kids. Yeah, and the old books also tell us that,

I'm serious when I say this, that God has damned on this earth anyone that is involved in any way that purposely hurts children. God has damned them all and it's time to say it. Amen. Thank you. Thank you.