The Ultimate Blog Podcast - 39. How to avoid burnout with Vanda Aubrey

Episode Date: September 13, 2022

Running a business and doing all of the other things you have on your plate can lead to burnout if we don’t have the right tools to prevent it. Today our guest, Vanda Aubrey, is here talking all about how to avoid burnout. We chat with Vanda about setting yourself up for success so you don’t experience burnout, having too many things on your plate, staying focused on your goals, signs of burnout and what to look for, what we can do when we feel that burnout, tips for prioritizing sleep, and how Vanda helps her clients. Understanding burnout and what we can do about it is so important when thinking about starting a blog. Tune in to hear all of the helpful tips that Vanda has to share.Connect with us on Instagram: @sparkmediaconceptsCheck out The Blog Depot. This is a community and course that we have set up for you if you need questions answered before you start your blog. Join the waitlist for The Ultimate Blog Bootcamp, our online course and coaching that helps you build the blog that you have always dreamed of.SHOW NOTES: www.sparkmediaconcepts.com/episode39

Welcome to the Ultimate Blog Podcast with Amy Reinecke and Jennifer Draper. We're on a mission to empower women who want to start or grow their own blog. This podcast is for women who want to learn blogging basics and who crave inspiration and encouragement. Whether you're just getting started or have been a blogger for years, we're excited to welcome you into this space where we are passionate about creating community over competition. We are bloggers who want to encourage you to believe in your potential, step outside the norm and step into a life where you create your own schedule, your own success, and your own story. Join us for weekly episodes as we navigate blogging

and work from home life all while raising a family and having some serious fun along the way. all while raising a family and having some serious fun along the way. We have a treat for you. I am so excited to bring Vanda Aubrey onto the ultimate blog podcast today. And this is a little bit different than what we have done before, but I think it is actually one of the most important episodes that we are going to release to date. Vanda is with the Hormone Balance Academy, and she is here today talking about preventing burnout in your business and how we can do that with all the other things that we have on our plate. So Vanda, welcome to the Ultimate Blog Podcast. Thank you so much for having me. I'm so excited to be here. Yes, we are excited to have this conversation because I think it's a

really important conversation, especially as people are getting started, whether they're blogging or starting their entrepreneur career. I think that talking about burnout and how we can prioritize self-care out of the gate is only going to be beneficial to them in the long run. So first and foremost, I would love for you to talk a little bit more about your story and who you are and how this relates to you. Okay, of course. So I am Vanda. Amy already introduced me, but my background is in nursing. And after I was in nursing for a few years, I was introduced to the side of functional medicine and got very interested in it. That kind of stemmed from my own history and story struggling through being on birth control, coming off birth

control, losing my period for a long period of time, and just wanting to have a more holistic approach to how I cared for myself and addressed my health concerns. So I went on to get a certificate in functional medicine and found out that there were a lot of friends and people around me that were also interested in those topics that needed that information. And that led me to creating courses for women where I educate them on the things that I have learned. And I also work with women one-on-one to do some HTMA testing where we can make like a really customized, personalized plan for them to address their symptoms and concerns. And on top of that, you still work another job. I do. Yeah. So I work a

normal 40 hour week at my, I call it my day job. And then I run my business kind of in the cracks of my day and on the weekends amidst being a mom to three kids and a wife to my husband and maintaining our farm. We live on a 37 and a half acre property. So I definitely can relate to those that are very busy and need to really be intentional about caring for themselves and making sure that they take care of themselves and prevent burnout before it happens. So you said a really important keyword there, and that was being intentional. And I think that when we are moms and entrepreneurs and building these businesses, we have to be intentional with the things that truly matter. And I'm a firm believer that health is wealth and that when we take care of ourself,

we can better take care of others. We talk a lot about blogging being in that realm of helping people. And how we show up each and every day a lot of times is using our own stories and experiences to help others. But how can we use those experiences if we are burned out? And when we start our blogs, I think a lot of times we don't realize that it's going to take a lot of time and energy. It takes years to build. It's not something that you are going to quickly build overnight and make large sums of cash in a quick amount of time. It's definitely a long game. So when we're speaking to people who are at the beginning of their journey, whether they're

a blogger or entrepreneur, or they're just working in the creative space, how can we help them be intentional from the start to prioritize self-care so they can set themselves up for success versus setting themselves up for burnout? So I think it's really important in the beginning to not start comparing yourself to other businesses or bloggers around you. Because sometimes we get on Instagram, and we see these people that are really successful in their business. And it's like, they're running this business, they're a mom, they might still have another job, and they seem like they're doing all the things. And they're really successful in doing that. But you might not

be in that season of your life where you can do all the things and show up in multiple different places. So I think kind of like remembering from the get go that you are at the beginning and that you don't have to have it all figured out from day one. Like it's okay to be in that season of learning and kind of taking on one thing at a time. Why do you think it's such a struggle for us to only take on one thing at a time? Do you see most women that come to you? Like, do they already have like so many things on their plate already? Yes, absolutely.

I think it is in our personalities as women. And then as women that take on entrepreneurship, I think that we are more likely to have like a type A personality where we want to do all the things we want them to be done perfectly. And we hold ourselves to such a high standard and don't want to say no to anything that we just take on and take on and we give and give and give until we don't have any more to give. So if somebody is thinking about taking on entrepreneurship, but they do, you know, they have a family or they have a full time job, should they just like say, Nope, can't take it on? Or are there things they can think about to help them decide whether or not this is the right thing for them? Because they're obviously excited,

they're passionate about it, but they can't just let go of all their other obligations. So what kind of things can they think through to make sure that they're making a good decision? So the first thing that I recommend to anybody that's like thinking about taking on a business and wanting to keep their health in the back of their mind and like their self-care is to really prioritize from the beginning, what is actually going to move the needle? Like what are the like one or two most important things that you can do from day to day or week by week that are going to move the needle

and aren't just extra fluff stuff? Yeah, because I think it's like you said, it's so easy to compare yourself to everyone else. And so you're like, oh, well, they're on Instagram and they're on Facebook and they're blogging two times a week and they're doing all the things. So if you really take that step back and say, but what do I want out of this?

What is this going to bring to my life? You're obviously you're doing it because you want to help people, but you also have to see some benefit for all that work that you're putting in as well. I think you have to know kind of what your goals are and just really stay focused on those really important things, like one step at a time, one foot in front of the other, and you will get there. You don't have to run a race. Absolutely. So when we start, a lot of times we're taking these small steps. And I like that you said not to compare yourself to others. When is there a point that we might look at what we're doing and we're like, well, I can't

keep up. Like it does our health. Basically, does our health take a toll on us in such a way? Like how does a person know if burnout is something that they're experiencing? Maybe they're wanting to start a blog or whether they're already blogging maybe already. And maybe they're already feeling pieces of that burnout already. Like what are some signs to look for in regards to our health that shows us, Hey, you need to like, take a step back, calm down and basically reprioritize.

What are some of those signs that we can look for? So the beginning stages of burnout, usually it's, it's a feeling. And then it's also like physiologically happening inside your body. Cause we kind of know when we think of burnout, we know what we think that that is. And it's feeling run down, feeling tired, having a lack of motivation, not wanting to do all the things anymore, like kind of dreading all the tasks that you have to check off for your day. start to recognize those things, it's time to look at all the things that you've committed to or all the things you have to get done in a day, a week, a month, and look and see, like, are there things that you can either eliminate, you can pass off to somebody else, or that you can reprioritize to next month? Because, you know, coming back to that again, like we don't have to do all the things right now. We have room to do them later.

I think that that's an important message of to everything there is a season. And we don't always have to show up in every space at any given time, but each season can come up and bring new things. And that might mean if you need to take on something new in your business, that something else drops off. And that doesn't make us a failure. And I think a lot of times when we start to prioritize

self-care or healing our bodies or making sure that we are not setting ourselves up for burnout, we consider it kind of a failure if we have to let something go. And I think that guilt has a lot to do with that. This guilt that we should be able to do all the things that so-and-so is doing, or I should be able to do these things because I'm not as stressed out or don't have as much on my plate as so-and-so. And so that comparison, I think a lot of times sets us up for, it robs us of the joy that we should be getting from this, from this business. Because I think as creative entrepreneurs,

one of the blessings is that we get to choose our topic. We get to choose what we're spending our day talking about. And if we choose a topic that we're passionate about, what a blessing this is to show up in this space like this. But if we are showing up and like you're saying, those signs of burnout, like we're not enjoying it anymore, or we feel really tired and fatigued and we're not excited all the time. I think it's important to take that step back and maybe ask ourselves like, is this, is this worth it? And am I comparing myself to somebody else in this space? And we don't know like their health history. So functional medicine has a very, very special place in my heart. So I, I know that like, there is these components that also lead up to, to burnout as well. It's

not just like what's on our calendar, but it's also what's going on inside of our bodies, you know? And so listening to those messages that our bodies are, are sharing with us. So let's say that we're past that point already. We're feeling the fatigue. We're feeling tired. We aren't excited about our business anymore. And it is something that we're passionate about. How can somebody who's already at that space, like take a pause and get themselves back to a healthy space or a healthy frame of mind in order to start moving that needle forward again. So you really have to start with focusing on the basics. It sounds really simple, but it's like these things are the building blocks for our hormones and our overall health.

So first we want to look at, are you consuming enough food and fuel and nutrients to let your body function the best that it can? Are you getting enough calories in your day? When you look at those calories, are you getting them from wholesome places, not just junk all the time? Are you getting enough sleep? You know, we really all should be striving to get seven or more hours of sleep each night. Are you working out too much? Because when

we take on a really strict or really high intense workout schedule, you're adding stress to your body when you're already stressed out, which can later on exhaust our adrenals and lead to burnout. And then are you allowing yourself enough time to have connection with others? Because that is a really important part of self-care that I think, especially with like in the last two years, we've kind of let slack because we haven't been gathering with people as much. So really taking time to spend time with your family, spend time with your significant other, with your kids. But then also specifically for us that are in business, find other people around you that are in businesses and they don't have to be in the same type of business you are, but just that have that entrepreneur mindset

and are going through some of the same things that you are as a business owner, because nobody can really understand those things and those frustrations and how to kind of navigate that life when they're not living it. So once you kind of get those basics really solid and back in place, you will slowly find that you're starting to feel better and you kind of rebuild that excitement for your business. So I would love to hear how you can prioritize some of those things. You shared with us that you work a full-time job and you run this business on the side and you have three kids on top of that. And so I know that myself and others listening likely have very similar type schedules that we're running from dusk to dawn. And so how can we prioritize? Let's just

tackle one thing. Let's tackle sleep. Because a lot of people who work a full-time job and then are blogging or doing something else on the side, they're working late into the hours at night. So what tips do you have in order to prioritize sleep? I think that that's a big one that a lot of people struggle with. So I think the first thing that you have to do is set boundaries with yourself on when you're willing to work on your business. Does that mean you're getting up early in the morning and working on your business before you start your normal job? Are you setting aside two hours at night after your kids go to bed?

Do you have a set bedtime, for lack of a better better word that you're going to stop working and either do self-care for yourself, get your bedtime routine down, spend time with your spouse before you fall asleep? And then there's nobody else around you that can hold you accountable because it's on you and your own business. really commit to saying, this is what I can take on. And I am going to abide by these boundaries that I've set for myself, because I know in the long run, it's going to benefit me the most if I stick by this. So a lot of it is really staying organized to an extent, having like a calendar, so to speak, even if it's not actually on your calendar, but knowing like, okay, this is my cutoff time. So then you sort of just have to let go whatever is not done at that point in time, right? You just have to say, this is it, I'm done.

And I think a lot of us struggle with that because the list is never ever ending because you're building your business and all this, there's always things you can be working on. So you have to be able to find a way to shut it off. And that's always a struggle. It is. And I think you're so right.

I think the longer that we're in business, we learn what our capacity is. And I think in the beginning, we are so apt to take on more than what we can really handle. And then we do feel like a little bit of disappointment in ourselves that we couldn't get all those things done. But the longer that you're in business, you're better able to plan out your month, plan out your year even when you learn. Like a personal story, I realized this past summer that in May and June, I need to step away from taking on clients because my kids' ball schedule is insane. We practically lived at the ballpark and I didn't have time for my business as much as I would have liked to have.

Okay. I am so glad that you brought that up because I am the same predicament with my kids in sports. We have two that are in sports. And like this fall, for instance, between my two boys, they're in four sports. And so it is a lot of that. And Jennifer has said to me before when I've said things like, I don't have a lot of extra time. I don't have time to see my friends as much, or I can't work on the business in the evening or things like that.

She said to me, that's a choice though. That is your social gathering when you're going to games and such. And so that simple mindset shift was key because then I went from saying, well, I don't have time to, I'm choosing this time to spend with my kids at the ballpark because I love watching my kids play sports. That is truly one of my most favorite things to do. I don't want to give that up for my business if I'm, if I'm honest. So we're going to have some of those non-negotiables. I'm glad that you brought that up because a lot of us do have kids who are very active in things. And so we have to navigate like our goals as, as women without losing ourselves in motherhood and then giving our kids the childhood that we want them to have. I mean, that's a lot to balance

on, on any given day. And heck any of us, like our adrenals are we want them to have. I mean, that's a lot to balance on any given day. And heck, any of us, like our adrenals are going to be freaked out, you know, like just thinking about that. But I think when we can like take a step back and say, May and June, like those are light months for me. Jennifer and I had that discussion this summer, like it was just going to look different. And so those were lighter months for us. We have the intention this year of taking December off, not recording any podcast episodes,

obviously staying on social, but pulling way back and being able to enjoy the Christmas season with our families and knowing that that's a very attainable thing to do with a creative business like this. But it does take some organization but it does take some organization and it does take some reflection too. I think that's really good that you brought that up because I know when I was very first starting in business, I didn't have the forethought to plan for the whole year. I was just focused on like, what can I do this month? And what are my goals for this month? But since then, I've really learned to look at the whole year and say,

you know, okay, I want to do this in quarter one, I want to do this in the month of June. And that has really helped take some things off my shoulders a little bit and just know when I have them planned, and that I have the capacity at that time to take them on. And really just be realistic with your goals when you're setting them with those things in mind. And it's okay to push something off till the next year because you want to choose taking time off, having some vacation time to having some downtime. Your business can still move forward. It just may not be as quickly as you would hope. But in the long run, I would think it would actually be better because you're never reaching that burnout point where you just completely stop working on it altogether.

You're just making intentional choices every day about what you will and won't work on so that you can have that time to do other things as well. Absolutely. I love that. Do you want to start building a foundation for your blog? Do you have questions you need to answer before you start? Do you wish that you had someone there to hold your hand through the process? We are so excited to share that we have created a membership community just for you. The blog Depot is an online course and membership community that will

teach you the foundations you need to build a blog. We teach you about niching down, finding the right mindset, the best platform to build a blog on, and so much more. With monthly coaching calls inside the community, you will find the support you need to finally make your dream a reality. The doors are open to join this amazing blogging community, and we can't wait to help you find the link to join the blog Depot in the show notes.

Well, let's talk a little bit more about what you do with the hormone balance Academy, because I'm sure that there are some people like, well, how does this relate to blogging? Like, how are we going to tie this in? And I said earlier that your health is as well. And so if we don't feel our best, then we are not going to be able to show up our best in business either. And so why don't you share a little bit more about how you might help somebody who is feeling burnout or just not feeling their best? Like maybe they've had, you know, a couple of kids, maybe they haven't had any kids, maybe they're struggling with fertility and they just don't feel their best. And that, that lack of feeling their best is also making

them feel kind of apathetic about starting a new business or wanting to do things in their life, or the things that used to be exciting for them are no longer exciting. As you have a new client come in or a new prospect or whatever, like what would be some of those first steps that you would do in order to like talk to them about, about feeling better in their body? So the first step that I usually take with everybody that I work with is kind of finding out what their symptoms are, how they're feeling overall, how long that's been going on. And we just do kind of like a deep dive into their health history to identify like where this started from, how long it's been going on. And then typically, I take women through my hormone reset course first, because that is where

I teach the foundations. And we have to get the foundations in first, in place first, before we can really build on that and optimize our hormones to help us feel the best. Specifically for somebody that is experiencing symptoms of burnout currently, I like to teach them the foundations and get those in place consistently for like six to eight weeks before I move them into one-on-one coaching where we do HTMA testing. for those that might not know what that is that's hair tissue mineral analysis and it's a it's a hair sample test that you like clip some of your hair you send it into the lab and what we're looking at there is their mineral status which gives us insight to all kinds of hormone balance within our body it gives us insight into thyroid health, how their blood sugar balance is, the adrenals, their estrogen progesterone ratio. And then we're able to take

that information. And instead of giving like blanketed advice for what they should do, we can really target exactly where they're depleted or exactly where their problems are. And with HTMA testing, it's very useful because where with a blood draw, you're just getting a glimpse into like one point in time, you get three months of data with HTMA testing, it's an average over the past three months. So it's just super valuable to be able to more personalize their diet lifestyle supplements that they may or may not need? I think that kind of getting to the root cause of some of the ways that we're feeling is really important. I've been working with a functional med practitioner since 2019, since I was diagnosed

with Hashimoto's and it is definitely a long game. It's a journey. It is not a quick fix. It's kind of like blogging in that way that you have to have a lot of patience with it. But I think something that I know that I was struggling with is just not feeling like myself. And so diving deeper for some of those answers was really important to me. And then it does give me permission in my business to take a step back or take a rest when I need to. Yesterday, for instance, I had some things on my to-do list, but I felt so completely worn out yesterday. I just could not get myself going. And by the time I had laid my daughter down for a nap, I was like, I am not going to make it through the evening at

this point. I have to lay down. That's, that's the only option. And before like realizing that that was such a huge piece of my health, I would have just pushed through. I would have like popped some more caffeine and I would have just worked my way through, but I made myself lay down without guilt. And when I, when I woke up, it was, I still fight with that a little bit, that like that guilty feeling of, I should not be napping during the day. Like my husband was at work and my kids are in school and I was supposed to be working, you know, but I woke up and like, I can't be who I need to be if I am run down and I am not rested. And so I think that it's just giving ourselves that permission to take care of ourselves in that way that we might not otherwise know, unless we had,

had done some of those, those things like I've had an HTMA and things like that. And it just gives you insight to like, if you're doing those things, like if you're prioritizing like whole food, if you're prioritizing your sleep and your stress is at a minimum and you still don't feel like yourself, like maybe it's time to dive into more answers and ask yourself those questions. So you can show up and be like an active participant in your life. Like that's why we're here. And if you're listening to this podcast, it's likely because you have something that you want to share with the world and you want to have the energy in order to do that. And a way to do that is to make sure that you're taking care of this body that you have. And sometimes that, that looks different than what we think

it looks like. I think one of my favorite things about functional medicine is that it really teaches you to get in tune with your body and listen to the signals that your body is giving you because our body will tell us so much if we just listen to it. But for so long, we've been taught to ignore, ignore, ignore what our body's saying. Yeah. And we beat ourselves up. We're like, well, I'm not doing enough. I should be doing this. Just like Amy was like, I feel guilty if I take a nap, but there could be another reason. So be kind to ourselves. And if we're not accomplishing all the things that we think we should be, maybe we need to take a step back and

say, maybe I do need to ask for help. Maybe I do need to look at the bigger picture. Am I taking care of myself? Am I treating my body right? Am I making sure I have healthy, nourishing foods every day and getting enough sleep and all of those things are, we need to be so much kinder to ourselves because I know I'm the queen of beating myself up. And so I'm, I'm saying this from, for myself and for other people out there who are like me, we have to be kind, we have to give ourselves grace, and we have to think of the whole big picture and know that if we're struggling to accomplish that to-do list or to keep up with where we think we should be, maybe it's time to reevaluate some of those goals and say, how can we move forward and also feel really good while we're doing it? I think that part of the recipe for being a successful blogger or

entrepreneur is taking care of this piece of ourselves. And also knowing that it's actually not... There's not an end goal. We're always going to be able to work more in our business. So we could literally... Jennifer and I often say we could literally never sleep. We could just work all the time and we could never take a break. So you have to force yourself to take those breaks because they are so important. Because you don't... You obviously started this for a reason. And so you want to be able to see that, you know, at the end point or like to the goal that you've created for yourself. And it might not happen like when you want it to, or as fast as you want it to or whatever, but I can guarantee you that if you don't listen to the signals that your body's telling you along the way, it might not ever happen because you're going to burn

yourself out before you're ever going to get and reach that goal. So the end of thanks so much for like sharing this today. I know this is such a different kind of episode than we've ever had on the podcast, but I just truly think that we, Jennifer and I had felt burned out. Like, I'll just say it. I'll just be really honest. Like, I know I have friends in my life who are like, I don't know how you're doing all that you're doing. And my response sometimes is like, I don't either.

Like, I don't know either. And so I want to make sure that we give like light to this and say, it's okay to seek answers. It's okay to take a step back. It's okay to reprioritize some things. In fact, it's not just okay. It's necessary sometimes. And it's okay if it slows down the pace a little bit, but I want you to like, if you're listening to this, I want you to ask yourself, why did you decide to start a blog or why did you want to be an entrepreneur? Is the experience that you're having right now, is that meeting your why? Do those align? Like, are you giving yourself more freedom by doing this or are you making yourself feel worse by being in the state that

you're in? And if you're making yourself feel worse, then maybe think about some of these things that Vanda has shared today. Make sure you're prioritizing some wholesome nutrition and some sleep. What are you doing to mitigate stress? And are you making time for the people in your life who are the most important to you? And I think that when we can get those, those basics down and their basics, but they are hard. Like I think that when we can get those, those basics down and their basics, but they are hard. Like those are hard. We can say all day like, Oh, that's easy. But those are, those are tough things to master, but start with one and see how you feel and then move from there. Absolutely. They are hard things and it's really like the consistency

that matters in the long run. So like you said, it's great to start with one thing. I'm going to get this habit down and I'm going to be consistent with it. And then I'll worry about the others. I think that's a great piece of advice. Okay. Vanda, would you like to share with everybody how they can connect with you and how you can help them? Absolutely. So I hang out the most on Instagram. You can find me at hormone.nurse.vanda and join my email list over there. I love to hang out on Instagram. I do have a TikTok with the same handle now, but I deliver some exclusive content to my email list about every two weeks. And I love to hang out and connect there. So reach out to me anytime,

especially if you have questions or you think that you might be experiencing burnout, I would love to chat about it. That's awesome. Thank you so much. Yes. Thank you for coming today. Welcome. Thank you for having me. Thanks so much for tuning in today. If you'd like to continue the conversation about blogging with us, please find us on Instagram at spark media concepts. You can also sign up for our weekly newsletter where we share blogging tips and inspiration. You can sign up by finding the link in the show notes. For those of you who are ready for the next step and want to start your own blog, join the waitlist for the ultimate blog bootcamp. The link to join the waitlist is also in the show notes. Go out and make today a great day.