The Unplanned Podcast with Matt & Abby - TikTok's Triplet Mom: $7M NICU bill & Premature birth at 28 weeks

Episode Date: February 19, 2025

Haylee and Mitch Hess open up about the unimaginable journey of becoming parents to triplets born at just 28 weeks, each weighing only two pounds. They share the challenges of navigating the NICU, facing a $7 million medical bill, and receiving a life-changing cerebral palsy diagnosis. From their babies needing feeding tubes and oxygen to adjusting to life at home, they reveal the highs and lows of their experience. This episode is sponsored by ZocDoc, Needed, Lume, Chime. Zocdoc: Go to https://Zocdoc.com/UNPLANNED and download the Zocdoc app for FREE! Needed: Head to https://thisisneeded.com and use code UNPLANNEd for 20% off your first order. Lume: Control Body Odor ANYWHERE with @lumedeodorant and get 15% off with promo code UNPLANNED at https://LumeDeodorant.com! #lumepod Chime: Make progress towards a better financial future with Chime. Get started today https://chime.com/UNPLANNED. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Our kids are born at 28 weeks. You don't want to have a child that's born and they weigh two pounds and they don't know what's happening and the first thing they have to do is fight for their life. I'm getting emotional about it now but it was scary it's just such a big life change I feel like people get excited to have twins but then having triplets is just a whole next level. Yeah I saw a third baby from the very beginning he's putting the thing over her belly and I'm going doctor right what there's a third one he said that beginning. He's putting the thing over her belly. I'm going doctor. I there's a third one

He's got multiple times and the doctor started kind of laughing cuz he's like dude like there's two What's the medical bill for three months in the NICU? Yes, three million dollars higher five million dollars more Shut up mom to mom. What is postpartum like after triplets? Oh my gosh I mean, I did experience a little bit of postpartum. Do you guys think you're gonna have baby number four? It could be baby four five six. There's a chance. Haley and Mitch welcome to the unplanned podcast. Do you guys like ever fart in the hot tub? We were talking about farting in the hot tub? Is that ever something that you guys do? We were talking about farting in the hot tub and then I felt like this was a great segue.

I made a post where I was like, there's bubbles in the hot tub but this thing didn't have jets. And then everyone's like, is this your way of saying you had gas? Just looking at Mitch, I already know Mitch has farted in the hot tub. If the jets are on, then yeah.

See, that was doing with no jets. Oh my gosh, this is a great introduction. No jets is crazy. No jets is crazy. No jets is crazy. Psycho! You guys are such positive people, and I swear, in your position, I might've developed a drinking problem

because you guys have been through so much. You guys had three kids at the same time, and then you thought like your kids were gonna die at one point, and then that was not just one point, that was like multiple points along the journey where you thought like you were gonna lose a child That's crazy. You guys have been you guys are you guys are insane. I'm so inspired by you. Seriously. I really am

And you guys have so much energy is it because this is your first time away from them or are you guys always like this? I drink a couple of energy drinks today already But this also is our first time away from them and it's weird. Don't make me cry. Hey did you develop an energy drink addiction at one point in your life? No just since I've had the triplets. Oh okay hey. I just I don't know they taste really good it's like my little treat and I'm like if this gets me through the day that's okay that's the worst thing I do to get me through the day that's okay. 100% You're a mom of three triplets. Yeah. I mean, triplets means three. So I didn't. Yeah, that's amazing.

Yeah. Thank you. But it does feel weird to be away from them. Like, I'm not going to lie. Like it was almost like a bittersweet thing where it's like, OK, like I can breathe for a second, you know, I can get away. But then it's like the first time ever in two and a half years that I've left them alone or We're not alone, obviously. They're with my...

Somebody. Yeah, somebody. They've never been alone. They've been taking care of... They've never been alone, everybody. They've never been alone. They've never been alone. They're some random person.

Some like random person. Yeah, they're okay. They're okay. Probably somebody you've never met before. Probably just like using an app. Yeah. Like who's some random person that can watch my kids? Yeah, but it feels good, but yeah, I do miss them.

Oh my gosh. This is good. This is the first time we've woken up and we didn't have to just go tend to a child. Did you guys get like seven hours of sleep? Like what happened? We didn't even we woke up at the normal time. Yeah what's so sad is I didn't even sleep at night. My body popped me up because I'm used to Lenin waking me up every day so I just wake up I'm like I didn't even sleep in gosh dang it. Which kid wakes up the earliest? Lenin waking me up every day, so I just wake up, I'm like, I didn't even sleep in gosh dang it. Which kid wakes up the earliest?

Lenin, she's our little blondie girl. Our middle child. She has some sleep issues. Our middle child. Yes, our middle child. Sleeping issues. Yeah, she just screams in the middle of the night sometimes, and she always just wakes us up in the morning.

It's not like, she doesn't have sleeping issues, she just doesn't sleep well. She's not a good sleeper. She just wakes up first no matter what and goes to bed last no matter what. But totally fine. That's just what she does. Oh my gosh, you're like, please just please go to sleep. Do you guys feel happy right now? Do you feel sad?

Is it like a mix of both being away from the kids? It's both probably. I'm like, okay, we needed to have a little getaway just for us to just like, I mean, every parent needs that, their time together and for our marriage just to, our goal this year was to start getting out of the house and traveling more with the kids, without the kids, because we're finally past all their previous health issues, I guess we'll get into that later,

but we finally feel comfortable where we can get out of the house and trust other people with the kids. So we're like, yeah, it's kind of a bittersweet feeling, just being out, but then also kind of sad because I miss them. I know. Mitch, is it selfishly kind of nice

that you have your wife's complete 100% attention right now? Yeah, it's kind of nice. We've actually talked about it. We're like, we need to focus. Maybe we should talk about that but like we are so focused on our kids 24 7 and this stem from when they were born because yeah they needed full attention because they were like you said like they're literally fighting for their lives every single

day and how many years how many months total do you think when we looked at each other like we need to focus on each other? Way more because we're being great parents, but we kind of neglected each other as spouses Which we just didn't anticipate happening because we were so Stressed and worried about our kids sure it's a survival. Yeah, I mean like you're literally just trying to keep your children alive That is that is it and I truly believe like every marriage has seasons and it's like maybe, you know, this isn't the season where we're like have a ton of energy left over

but it's like we still prioritize and have that. Are you guys able to have date nights ever or is it still like too hard to get away? Honestly, Mitchell's really good about planning date nights and like kind of sticking to it. And at home date nights are way fun. I feel like at the beginning, obviously, it has a season, we prioritize the kids a lot

because they had so many health issues. We were too exhausted really to prioritize each other in that moment and we kind of realized that. We kind of had like a sit down moment and we're kind of like, okay, we really need to somehow try and prioritize each other even if just for an hour once a week you know and so slowly that grew into at-home date nights and he's really good at planning them he does a good job but you're so much better at being a husband than me so and and now it's like we're starting to incorporate babysitters and stuff.

But yeah, for a while, I mean, it's been, I mean, they're almost three now. And how long ago did we start doing at home date nights? Was it? I don't know. Maybe a year ago. Maybe a year or so. That's so cute. What does an at home date night look like for you guys?

Do you want to tell them what you do? I don't know. We did this when we were single, or not single, when we were just us two. What is that called? Dual income, no kids? What is that called again? Wait, doink?

When we worked our way up? Dink. Dink. A dink. When we were dinks, meaning we had no kids. That sounds like a derogatory term. I know, dink. We're dinks, man.

What we're talking about, the date nights. So we didn't have a lot of money and we were saving like crazy because we're just trying to make good choices I guess. And we'd make at home pizza, something simple like that. And then we'd watch a movie to end the night. But instead of watching a movie on the TV, I would always try to get a projector screen.

I had a little one and we'd go and get a truck and go put up a screen somewhere, like somewhere random with a view. That like put up a screen somewhere like, somewhere random with a view and watch it there. You know, so like nothing crazy, but we've always just done little things like that for day and night. And it's carried on till today.

We still do that type of stuff. That's so sweet. You guys said there were multiple times in your journey of being triplet parents that you thought there might be a chance of one of your kids or multiple of your kids not making it, when you found out that you guys were going to be parents to triplets, did you have any clue how hard it was going to be? We didn't know, obviously, because we had never experienced that before.

We didn't know anybody who had experienced triplets before. So I mean, right when we found out, I was just in shock in that moment, and all I remember in the appointment was Mitchell asking me if I was okay. Like, are you okay, are you okay? Are you okay? Because I think I just kinda looked like a ghost, but in that moment, it's kinda funny,

he was like so excited, like so pumped. Like, oh my gosh, we're gonna have three kids, because we were going through infertility stuff. And so he was pumped, but like automatically, I don't know if it's just as a woman or just who I am, I just was like, oh my gosh. That's a lot to process. Three kids, like am I going to be healthy?

Are they going to be healthy? I'm in my last semester of nursing school. Am I gonna be able to do a hundred hours of clinicals on my feet all day in my third trimester with triplets? 100 hours. 100 hours of clinicals. On your feet though.

We're not talking about sitting down. She's super woman. Did they let you sit? Did they let you like go around on like a chair? Like here we go. At the end they, there's no other option. They assigned me, I like worked close with my professors and stuff and I was like, hey, like I'm pregnant with

triplets. Can you help me out a little bit? And they assigned me to the mom baby unit. And of course all of the nurses there were like, oh my gosh, you're pregnant with triplets. Sit down. And it was nice actually because I got to work with a lactation specialist for milk supply and stuff.

So she helped me a lot with, because I really wanted to breastfeed the triplets and pump for them and stuff and provide breast milk for them. So they helped me with that and I don't know my brain just jumped to that you know like what are we gonna do like we needed a new car. It was just crazy finding out and and and it's weird I kind of feel bad sometimes looking back because in I mean for about two weeks we were kind of I don't like saying it I hate saying this we were kind of, I don't like saying it, I hate saying this, we were kind of sad and like I get emotional about it now but I just love them so, so much

and like to ever think that I thought that, that I was sad after all that we had gone through with infertility and I'm so grateful for them and they've changed my life. But yeah, like it was scary. Like it's just such a big life change. And I feel like people get excited to have twins and it's like normal,

but then having triplets is just a whole next level. And so, but yeah, like I don't look back at that time though and like get upset with myself for thinking that because all those feelings are valid. But yeah, I just love them so much and I'm so grateful for them. That sadness too wasn't about your children. It was just like processing that whole change. That's how I feel too.

We had an unplanned pregnancy with our second baby. I I think at that moment, like my first one out, I just cried and I wasn't excited for like a few weeks. And then I also felt that same similar guilt. I'm like, especially when holding Augie now, I'm like, why would I ever feel like, why would I ever cry when I hear about news of like, getting to bring you into this world? And I was like, it's because it wasn't personal.

It wasn't like about Augie, you know? It was about, okay, well, life is gonna look really different right now. And kind of just like grieving what you thought your life was gonna look like in that, you know, the next little bit. But then you come out on the other side, you're like, this was way better than I ever

could have even imagined. And you love him so much. So you're right, you cannot beat yourself up for like that feeling or feel guilty about it at all. I felt the exact same way as you When I found out we were pregnant by surprise Exactly same way That's crazy with three babies and you thought they were twins at first. Yes

So tell the story of one two three We thought we were pregnant with one and then two and then three so like we basically went through like three with one and then two and then three. So like we basically went through like three like shocks in the same day. No. So over a period of time, which made it even crazier. So I had PCOS, I have PCOS. So like trying to get pregnant and all that process was really hard. And I, so I was really tracking and I found out I was pregnant, so excited. Obviously we were expecting one baby. We go in two weeks later to our eight week appointment and they do a scan and the doctor just goes over my belly.

Or no, that was different. But anyways, we went in and they checked it and we saw two babies, but he said, he saw another one in there. I saw a third baby. I saw a third baby from the very beginning because the doctor told us, he goes, you have twins.

Shut up. And he's doing the, you know, putting the thing over her belly. And I'm going, doctor, I, there's a third one. Did you say that? He said that multiple times. And the doctor started kind of laughing

because he's like, dude, like there's two. I've confirmed there's two. And Mitchell's like, dude, like there's two, I've confirmed there's two. And Mitchell's like, no, I swear there's another one. And finally I'm like, Mitchell, he says that there's only two. Like it's okay, we have twins. I'm so excited. I'll literally point at the screen and say,

well, what's that? Well, what is that? And he goes, that's nothing. Dude, you're the reason though, that they don't let you take pictures and videos in the appointments. Because I wanted to take a video to remember it for ourselves and the technician wouldn't let us because people will freak out.

They'll see like a third leg, a fourth leg and they'll be like, my kid is like gonna walk on all fours or something. Like people just come up with these crazy ideas, but it's funny that you were actually accurate. You were actually right. You knew better than the doctor. I brought it up like probably this sounds crazy like 10 times like doctor I see it I see a third sack because he was like here's one sack here's two sacks on the ultrasound you can see

the third sack like in the corner like barely and I remember going home in the car and I'm like that's another that's another sack. Abby would have been like shut up Matt. She's like, stop it. Like he's, he's right. There's two. You're nice though. You don't like, you seem like a really nice person. So you're like, please stop talking. Like what did you say? Like how did you? A little legs, a little leg squeeze. A little squeeze. Is that your communication signal of like, shut up? Like is it? Just stop. Like squeeze? No, but we, um, we we, so that was our eight week appointment.

And then with twins, you go in generally a little bit more because I mean, it's twins, it's raises the risk a little. And so we went back in and then instantly we sit down and he just goes, puts the gel on, goes over my belly. He was actually a technician, right? No, it was the doctor. It was the doctor. It was the doctor.

And he just goes right over like this and it goes boop,op boop all three and then Mitchell's like I immediately looked at the doctor because I still have in my head Same doctor. I looked at the doctor. I don't even say anything. I just look at him like The doctor kept telling me to be quiet last night, you know, like Had passed only two weeks that we thought we were having twins. So yeah, we were in there and then he goes, well, I'm not gonna be able to see you guys anymore. And I was like, why is that? And I was worried about the babies.

I'm like, oh, is something wrong with them? I knew. And he knew. Because I saw it again. And then he's like, cause you're having triplets. And then... I got chills immediately. I was just like in shock, immediate shock.

I don't know what else happened after that appointment. I don't remember anything. Thank you to ZocDoc for sponsoring this portion of today's episode. So I'm actually currently sick if you can't tell by the sound of my voice. And I've used ZocDoc a ton in the past. It's been so, so helpful. And I just love that you don't have to leave the comfort of your own home. ZocDoc is a free app, if you don't already know, and website where you can search and compare high quality and network doctors and click to instantly book an appointment. They have same day appointments even, but typically it happens within 72 to 42 hours of booking, which is unreal.

I feel like you can spend so much time driving and then waiting around or you can't even get an appointment to begin with. And so it's nice how instant and helpful it is. We're talking about booking and network appointments with more than 100,000 doctors across every specialty from mental health to dental health, primary care to urgent care and so much more. We love ZocDoc. We've recommended it to so many people including my own mom who used it last month. So we use ZocDoc and you should too.

Stop putting off those doctor's appointments and go to ZocDoc.com slash unplanned to find and instantly book a top rated doctor today. That's Z-O-C-D- zocdoc.com slash unplanned to find an instantly book a top rated doctor today That's zocdoc.com slash unplanned zocdoc.com slash unplanned I always talk about like what happened after and she doesn't remember. I don't remember weird I was just like I agree because I feel like twins would feel like a cute shock Like exciting and then triples are like, oh Like my body how could three grow up?

Like, you're so petite. Oh, you're so nice. So petite. You're probably like, how are they all gonna fit in here? And like, oh, was it just fear or was it? Everything, just it hit me. You know, everything hit me. Just our life changed so much in that moment.

And so it was shocking. And you're stoked? And he was pumped. He's like, three kids. Let's go. Three kids. That's all I could think of was three kids. I'm going to take three kids to soccer practice, three kids to swimming lessons, three little best friends. They're never going to get bullied because they have two best friends behind them at

all times. That's all I was thinking about. But it hit him later. It hit him hard later. It was a total switch. So I was really like scared at the beginning and then jumping up and down like literally jumping up and down like like running like like back and forth like a dog because I was just like

I'm having three kids are you kidding me like how amazing you probably needed in that moment you probably needed like excitement and Yes. And then you guys swapped places. Yes. It was good for us to not be feeling the same thing at the same time because then it was kind of, later I could comfort him because he was dry heaving in the bathroom. We dry, you were throwing up?

Nerves. So this is what happened. So Haley was not very excited and it's totally understandable, but I was so pumped. And I remember we were at the kitchen table or at my parents' house. We were living here at the time. And I said, Haley, why are you not just like, why are you not so happy? And she said, because my health, baby A's health, baby B's health, baby C's health.

Um, we just bought a car and it doesn't fit three car seats. We're not going to fit into our, our new home. And she just started naming off very real things that could happen. Yeah. And my attitude, I mean, it was the biggest 180 where I couldn't think straight. I, that night she was sound asleep literally in the bathroom, dry heaving. Oh my gosh. Because I'm like, what if, what if Haley's not healthy? what if Hayley's not healthy? What if baby A's not healthy? What if baby B, baby C, all of them? What if all four of them have you know because this is a really serious deal and

the doctor actually let us know that he goes I need you guys to know like how serious this pregnancy is gonna be so all that hit me so I literally dry heaving in the bathroom. We're at my mom's house. I wanted and I didn't want to wake her up because I wanted her to sleep so I was so worried about her. She's I'm worried about my wife and I'm worried about my three kids that she's currently holding. Right? So I went up to my mom's room like a child and I woke her up. My dad was out of town. I woke her up and I just started sobbing and she just sat with me at like probably 4 a.m.

and just scratched my back into saying, everything's gonna be okay, your kids are gonna be healthy, your wife's gonna be healthy. As a 26 year old, however. I will say there's something to that, like becoming parents where you just like feel like you just need your parents like in that time. I just needed mom.

Yeah, I was like I need you. I started crying the other night. I'm gonna cry again, gosh dang it. Because I was thinking about like how much I love my kids I'm doing what my dad does and Just like just like just think about your mom like telling you everything's gonna be okay Cuz our son a couple like recently was not doing like just having like really bad cough And I was so worried about him like I drove at midnight to go get a humidifier to like make sure he was okay

I was just worried sick about him. Like I drove at midnight to go get a humidifier to like make sure he was okay. I was just worried sick about him and he was just coughing. Like I'm worried sick about my kid coughing. Like it's not even a big deal. And I had this realization of like my parents feel the same exact way. Like how I feel for my kids. They feel the same exact way for me and it just made me feel so loved. And so it just like hearing that your mom sat there and just said, everything's gonna be okay. And just rubbed her back. It's like, that's the sweetest, most beautiful thing ever.

Yeah. That's so sweet. My mom's amazing. She asked me, she says, do you wanna sleep in here? Do you wanna go downstairs with Haley? I went downstairs and slept with Haley that night. But yeah, she comforted me in that moment cause I was absolutely terrified.

And I also didn't want to stress her out even more. Cause the doctor literally said, keep your stress levels low because that has an direct impact. So even that kind of was, I don't know. It was just crazy. That first week was so crazy. Isn't that the worst advice though? Don't be stressed. Like that makes me stressed out.

I'm like, okay, now I'm stressed. Like you just told me not to be stressed. I know. And it's like, um, I'm in my last semester of nursing school. Of course I'm going to be stressed. What do you want me to do? Like, I don't know what to do, you know? Did you ever think about dropping out or were you like, I just had to finish?

I did think about dropping out, but I mean, a lot of people worked with me on things and like helped me take it easy. And wait, I think a lot of it was online too. I think I had a lot of classes online. So like I worked on my bed a lot, you know. But your clinicals was. But my clinicals was in person, but they, like I said,

they were still really good about, I mean, I still had to do a lot. Like you still have to learn everything, you know, but they were really helpful to me to like, let me like sit down in the rooms and you know, it was nice. Has that background been helpful at all with your own children? Extremely helpful. I honestly it's such a blessing that I had the knowledge that I

had because I mean all of our kids came home on oxygen. We dealt with feeding tubes. We dealt with I mean they were in the NICU for three months so I mean Mitch and I were taking like we wanted to know what to do when we got home. So we made sure that while we were there we were learning everything. Like we honestly, you became a NICU nurse while we were there. Like he learned so much. That's so cool. So it was really good. Three months in the NICU is that typical for triplets? So triplets typically I would say come around 32 weeks but our triplets came at 28 weeks and the difference like four weeks if you imagine how much a baby grows in four weeks it's huge so like I mean they were like on oxygen and so many cords while they were there they were in those

incubators Um, they couldn't be exposed to too much light There was a lot more that went into 28 weeks like taking care of 28 weekers than you know, like 32 or you know like the smaller they get the more care that they need about like the Haley went into labor and they couldn't stop it and usually when triplet because we there's a there's a small small Triplett community that we were a part of asking questions and all of them had examples of when we went into labor, you go into the hospital and they somehow stop it or slow it down for weeks. Yeah, there's ways to prevent labor from happening, but mine just wouldn't stop.

And so they tried everything and I was on magnesium. I don't know if you've ever been on magnesium or yeah like all that stuff and it was horrible But they couldn't stop it and we knew where they were coming. So wait on magnesium. I don't think that's like what I was It's not my magnesium. I think that's what it they put you on something and it's messes with your body It like makes you sweat a lot and like it's to help the baby's brain Oh, I didn't have like and steroids to help the baby's brains and long Wow, cuz they were like thinking that they weren't gonna be able to get the brain. Oh, I didn't have that. Yeah, and steroids to help the baby's brains and lungs. Oh, wow. I think that's what it was.

They were thinking that they weren't gonna be able to get the labor stopped. Yeah, it's just taking precautions just in case. And so they gave me all that stuff and yeah, I mean, they just couldn't stop it. And so they came and it was, I mean, super stressful, but I'm just happy we are where we are now because they're all healthy and doing well. I mean Lennon is still on oxygen because she still has

her little, when you're born early you have lung issues and you eventually grow out of them but she's just so tiny I think it's just taking her some more time. But yeah so I'm grateful that I was a nurse because honestly it's helped so much in taking care of them. I'm sure, that's so cool. Do you think that that is like why you went into nursing or do you think you will end up actually practicing? Honestly, like I feel like everything happens for a reason and as of right now, I'm loving being mom, you know?

So I don't know, I would love, I love nursing, I love the field, I love taking care of people, but we'll see. I don't know yet. Yeah, yeah, who knows. That is pretty nice though, to have a medical background and understand like, oh, if my kid's having this problem, I should do this. But what's nice for us though, Mitch, is ChatGPT.

Oh yeah. Oh my God. That has been so helpful. I could either ask ChatGPT or Haley, and both have the answer. I yeah. Oh my gosh. That has been so helpful. I could either ask Chachi PT or Hailey and both have the answer. I've been driving Abby crazy. She's like, stop talking to me. The things that you serve,

so I'm like, this is an opinion question. Like, why are you relying on Chachi PT? Oh, I use it for everything. Oh, I do too. We were on the plane yesterday to come here and they started spraying down our plane with something and I was like, what in the world? It freaked us out.

It scared us. I'm like, something's seriously wrong with the plane. We're still on the ground and I was still scared. But then I asked you at JBT, why are they spraying my plane right now? I'm in Salt Lake City. And I said, oh, it's because the weather is this degree and they're probably using this thing

so the plane doesn't freeze in the air. It just knows everything. So nice, I love it. It helped me with my son the other night because I was up till 3 a.m. worried sick about him because he was coughing a lot in his sleep. And I thought he he sounded like he might be developing symptoms of croup. I had croup when I was a seven

year old, which is like later than most kids get it. But I got rushed to the ER because I couldn't breathe. I sounded like a walrus like every single breath was like, it was like really scary. So I just did not want to be in that situation with my son and AI walked me through what to do. Like I was like, okay, apparently it helps if I have a humidifier. So I went and bought a humidifier, put it in his room.

Then it's helpful if it's colder in the house. So I made it 68 degrees so that he could sleep better. So yeah, dude, I feel you bro, like AI is amazing. It's the future, It's the future. You can either use AI or ask your nurse wife. She also has the answer to a lot of stuff. I don't know, I'm starting to forget things. I'm like, oh no. Yeah, but it was helpful because we had to place feeding tubes in there that went through their nose into their belly. What? Wait, you guys did that yourselves?

Yeah. She did that. Is that typical for most triplet parents? You have to know to put a feeding tube down your kid's nose? What's it like having 28 weak kids? So honestly, Mitch and I talk about this all the time because we can relate more, I feel like, to people who, like parents who have premature kids than parents who have triplets.

Right now I feel like I can relate more to parents who have triplets because it's busy and it's crazy. But at 28 weeks, like having a 28-weeker is so much harder than having triplets. Just because they require, I mean, so much. We had to place feeding tubes because they weren't eating. Like at certain weeks when you're in the womb, you develop reflexes, like a sucking reflex, for example,

but the triplets didn't develop that. So they had to learn it outside. They had to learn how to eat. They had to learn how to breathe. They had to learn how to go to the go potty. Like, yeah. Like their bodies weren't ready to come out yet. Their bodies weren't ready to do any of those things.

So when they're born, they were walking, so like they're gonna have to learn how to do everything. Breathe, go to the bathroom, suck, swallow, breathe, which is eating. They couldn't, and it was, and we had to do that with them because they wanted the parents to, to, you know, have that bonding moment and not the doctor or the nurse. And the medical staff was incredible, but they, they told us like, this is what we need to do. And that, the medical staff was incredible, but they told us this is what we need to do. And that that was the hardest thing. It was so hard. We... And growth was extremely important too. So when you're that little... How little were they? They're two pounds each. So... Imagine your hand

with the arms and the feet hanging off. That's how tiny they were. That was our three kids. Wait, wait, wait, okay. So like, yeah, my hand, head here, feet here. So it's like basically- So the head would be right here. Like the feet kind of dangling off. And the feet were just kind of dangling off your head and the arms. That is the teeniest tiny baby I could ever imagine. Yeah, literally I remember taking a picture.

I have a picture of my pinky next to Tommy's arm. And this is when they're a little grown. Next to her arm. Like, yeah, when they were what, 32, 34 weeks. And it was the size of her arm, my pinky. And your pinkies, that is like the smallest pinky I've ever seen. Wait, who's pinky is smaller, Abby's or yours?

You guys, that's like, you guys have the same size pinky. No, I actually got a lot of DMs the other day that I said I had fat fingers. Okay. Okay. Sensitive subject. Okay, okay. No, I just got a lot of DMs the other day that I said I had fat fingers. Okay. Sensitive subjects. Okay. No, I just got rolled off.

Breathing though, so your children had to learn how to breathe after they were born. They didn't learn, like they, how long did it take them to learn how to breathe when they were born at 28 weeks? Long time. Yeah, I mean, until they came home. So two months. Well, technically no, because they came home on, well, they were. I mean, they were breathing at 28 weeks? Long time. Yeah, I mean, until they came home. So two months. Well, technically no, because they came home on, well, they were-

I mean, they were breathing though, but like they were on, there's levels of oxygen that you can get on. Okay. So like some of them like help you like breathe on your own. Like it's just the machine. Like the machine is breathing for you. The machine is breathing for you.

And then there's others- Was that the kids? Like were they- When they were very first born. Lennon, I think was on it when she was first born, but there's just levels. And so like they graduated to different levels as they were in there, but they still needed oxygen therapy because they still needed more oxygen, you know. So, but the craziest part of being in the NICU was the feeding. And like, it was just crazy because you have to feed preemie babies a certain way or else

they can choke. It's so precise how you have to feed a premature baby. And you can't feed them all at once because you have to be individually holding that baby on their side, propping their head a certain way, holding the bottle. The angle has to be at an exact same, a perfect angle so they don't get too much milk. It was crazy. And it took 30 minutes per kid and then Lennon took 45 minutes to feed each time. So even coming home, Mitch and I would

rotate every three hours, we would start feeding the babies. And then by the time we were done feeding each child and then me pumping, we were going to start all over again in an hour. What's the medical bill for being in the hospital for three months? You know, right? Three. Guess, can we have you guys guess? Yeah, guess. Okay, hold up, so three children in the hospital.

For three months. For three months. With a lot of intensive care. Oh gosh. And a lot of specialists came to visit, cardiologists, like pulmonologists. I wanna say when I had a tumor as a kid, I wanna say my bill before insurance was a million.

So I'm gonna guess three million dollars for the three kids. Total. Shut up. Shut up. What do you think? What do you think? Wait, is it? I was not even going to guess that high. This is before insurance. This is before insurance, right? Yes. Yes. This is just the total. Thank God for insurance, dude. Well, some people don't have insurance. Some people are too poor to afford insurance. And then they're the people that get really screwed, even though they never had money in the first place. What's crazy is that this bill was so out of control that a social worker came in from the government right? Yeah once it gets to a certain point the government steps in and just f**ks it all. Because the insurance company can't I mean they could pay for it but it's it hurts them so bad too that they

said hey like this is now going to be 100% covered by the federal government like don't stress about this stuff so that was a huge stress really. That's really good. That actually gives me hope about humanity. Yes. Somebody did that. So we didn't have it. What we actually didn't pay a dime. But what was the toll? Can I guess again? I want to see if I can get closer. Thank you to Needed for sponsoring this portion of today's episode. Matt, this is a quiz for you because we've talked about Needed before on our podcast.

And remember, we started off by saying what percentage of pregnancies are unplanned pregnancies 50% you were really close. Okay, okay 40% that's a lot. So that's why it's never too early to start thinking about improving your fertility And that's why we're excited to talk about needed needed is a woman-owned brand that offers a complete nutritional system for fertility Pregnancy postpartum and women's health everything from egg quality to support for women who are trying to conceive to a lactation support plan for breastfeeding moms and even to stress and sleep support that supports all women including those in perimenopause or menopause. Needed is a collective of more than 6,000 practitioners working together to set a radically

better standard for women's health. There are so many things that doctors are just like hormones and you're like well that doesn't really help me and that's not actually a legitimate answer for the symptoms we're feeling and that's why I love that Needed is woman owned and they're just doctors that are looking to support women through healthy pregnancies or whichever stage of life you're in. I also think it's really cool that they have sperm support because a lot of the fertility problems get placed on women where men also play a very important role in fertility. So I love that they're thinking about it from that side too.

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Seven. What? $7 million. $7 million. $7 million. Did you get an actual bill for that? Or was it all separate? Actually, I need to find it because it's insane. I mean, each time that they had a cardiologist visit

for one kid, it was like a hundred grand. It was so much money. And there's no way we could have ever paid that. And that's the other thing is when doctors are coming in in like we know there's a price tag to all this stuff And but when you're in that moment doesn't matter like even if we're gonna go a billion dollars in debt do it Lives please same I'll be like broke one billion dollars. All right, where do I sign like? Yeah, I will be a slave to you for the rest of my life. You saved my kid, we're good. Abby and I were talking about the other day,

we were like, I was like, I'll chop my arm off for my kid. No, we literally go and have the base. I'm like, would you, I don't know, slice your foot off with no anesthesia for, you said that, like why am I doing this? It's like, well I'll slap. To make your kid's cold go away.

Yeah, I'm talking to my friends, I'm like, would you kill someone with your bare hands for that? They're I'm like, would you kill someone with your bare hands for that? They're like, yeah. I would kill someone with my bare hands for my kid. I would. Someone threaten my kid? No, we talk about this all the time.

There's a viral video where people are saying, new moms now are like, no, murder is wrong. I'm like, yes, but your children, all morals, out the door, save the kid. It's weird though, unconditional love, like how pure that is to a kid. No matter what they do, I don't know, they're starting to get feisty and then come back at me with this little attitude and I'm like, oh my gosh, I just love you. I hope one day you guys show them like some videos from the NICU and you're like, we love you so much. I hope that you guys show them that and they realize like the amount of time you spent just loving on them.

Oh wait. Like, you don't realize it when you're a kid. You have no idea. Even like, it's funny is like I I would say I had good parents. Like even if you have bad parents, like even a bad parent has to do some sort of something to like help you in some way, you know? It's like maybe they put food, maybe they suck, but maybe they kept you fed, you know?

Like that counts for something, you know? So I mean, you guys just, you guys are the ultimate amazing ones. Oh, go ahead. I was gonna say, Hiley is just the ultimate mom. Like our kids were born at 28 weeks and like they, like they had went through a lot. Like, like they literally fought for their lives

and you don't wanna have a child that's born. And the first thing they have to do is fight for their life. And they weigh two pounds and they don't know what's happening. And they have all these millions of courts connected to them And they're just in the incubator and they they can't even have lights on because it's too much the air the temperature has to be perfect and Haley just was the world's greatest mom and the reason why they're thriving so much is

Because Haley just works with them to this day 24 7 on their speech on on developmental skills and We go into we have have, what's that called when people come and like help us more? We had like speech therapists and stuff. Speech therapists and like people that help with like everything, movement. And they said like, you're for 28 weekers

and triplets on top of it, they're thriving. Like this is a case study of how your kids should develop being born that young. Like this is just a miracle. And I always just look at them, it's like, it's her. She is with those kids 24 seven, helping them talk, helping them move and she would do exercises with their legs. So their legs would function the right way.

Like, she's the world's greatest mom. And I just, I can't believe that I married her and I can't believe she's the mom Of my kids like I'm just I'm so lucky. I think you're the world's greatest dad Thank you I just can't believe how good of a dad Mitchell I mean he's talking all these things about me, but like I I feel like it's generational to like dads are just more hands-on now

And I mean he was totally fit to be a dad. Like I couldn't have gone through it without him for sure. Like we needed both of us there. And and I don't know, it's just crazy. It's just crazy where our life is now. And it's so great. Yeah. Tribble to the best thing ever. Yeah, we literally told each other, like, let's not cry.

You have to be crying like five times. So does he saw me over here. No, it's okay. I think like the beautiful thing about talking about stuff like this is it's just gonna help so many people. It's gonna give people so much perspective, whether they have gone through something like you guys have gone through or will in the future.

And like, I don't know, it's good to have perspective. Cause for me as a new dad when things are really hard I didn't know what the frick I was doing and I like believed this lie like I thought things were going to be hard forever you know I don't know if you guys ever thought like when you were in the NICU I don't ever felt like you were that was like where you were going to be for the rest of your life like it ever felt like this will never end and it probably was really really really hard well we have a so we of your life. Like it ever felt like this will never end. And it probably was really, really, really hard. Well, we have a, so we don't talk about this like ever.

I don't even know if you've ever told like your following, but you should tell them about the news that we got in the NICU when they did those scans. I don't, I mean, I don't, I don't want to get super into it, but I mean, we did get really bad news in the NICU that our kids could possibly have cerebral palsy, which was so- Not possibly, they did. That's what they told us. Yeah, it was and there was different levels of it too. They told us that they were going to have a movement disorder, which was so, so hard hard it was the worst news we had ever

gotten in our whole life and like somehow today it they just are healed like they don't have any issues whatsoever and we don't know how that happened they did the brain scan and they they came back and told us and they said hey your kids are gonna have this this disability and it could be anywhere from you know, you know, like they have an arm that has some movement issues, or they could be completely crippled. And I've gone through some things in my life

where I lost my dad at a young age. I lost my best friend right after high school. Just way too much death has happened in my family. There's a list and I don't know why that's happened to me. But having that news that your child could deal with something like that was the hardest thing, the worst thing I've ever heard. So I look at parents who have kids with,

whatever they're going through, a disability, whatever it is, and I think that those parents are the world's greatest humans. To be able to raise kids like that and to be patient enough, like I look up to those people so much. And I just, I think the world of them, like I see parents out there, you know,

pushing a stroller around with a kid who is disabled. And I look at Haley every time I'm like, that is probably the world's greatest mom or dad for being able to do that. Cause I don't think I could. You're so right. It's just utter selflessness. Wow.

Receiving that news had to be, I mean, you guys took so many crazy things. Were you just in a constant state of stress for a while there? Yes. Do you feel like you're still kind of operating at that? Or there's like a point. No Do you feel like you're still kind of operating at that? Or there's a good point? No, I feel like starting last year is,

I think it was January of last year that we were like, I feel like I can breathe finally. Like they're growing, they're healthy. Like we made it past all the health challenges. Like we're okay. Like we finally realized we were okay. And I remember that January of last year was like, okay, we can do this. Like we got through we were okay. And I remember that January of last year was like, okay, we can do this.

Like we got through this hard stuff. Now like, let's just be parents and let's have fun. And that's one thing that I wish I could have gone back as a mom and just told myself, like everything is going to be okay. Take in these moments with them, even though it's hard as the health challenges, all these difficulties, even though it's hard as they're like the health challenges, all these

difficulties, even though it's hard taking these little moments when they're so tiny and so cute. Like each moment as a mom, I just want to take it in and just realize where I am because I'm always stressed about something or like, and so I don't know, just taking advantage of those times because they're only little for so long. And I'm sure you guys feel that too. Totally. I mean, they grow so fast.

Yeah I tell you it's so fleeting like those moments it's like and it's so crazy how fast you forget like you know it changes you forever but you're like I just can't remember I don't remember like going through that because you're just like you're so focused on the mission that it's just like you're not even thinking about how you're feeling. You're like, okay, well go, go, go. And I can't even imagine like your experience too, but they, I've heard this conversation a lot recently

about like stress and like our nervous system. And I feel like that, that period of time had to have like a lasting effect on your nervous system. And now you have three like thriving children like what is life like now do you sleep do you like is are you guys constantly having colds or like someone always puking or getting into trouble like what's it like three two-year-olds I told Matt on the way here I was like that's so fun it's so fun so fun they're talking now too it's like my favorite

stage isn't that the best? Yeah. Cause like, I don't know, for me, the newborn stage is kind of just keeping them alive. But like when, when they're talking with you, it's incredible. I mean, it's, it's incredible. There's nothing better. There's nothing better.

It's amazing. And what I love more than anything right now is them interacting with each other. Oh yeah. Like them talking to each other, bossing each other around, like, I don't know. It's hilarious. Do they fight? I'm sure all of them.

Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. They fight like crazy. They're just, I mean, it's just what you would think. I always tell people that, like, what is it like having two girls? I'm like, whatever you're thinking,

it's probably pretty accurate. It's just chaos. Did the sisters gang up on your son? Yes. It's so sad, you guys sisters gang up on your son? Yes. We have to be easy on him. No, you have to be easy on him. He's just a boy. The girls are feisty. They're so feisty and it like, oh my gosh, it's so sad, but sometimes he gets left out, you guys. And it makes me so sad, but I don't know. Hopefully, I mean, they're all close. They're all three best friends. They're all close, but I don't know. Hopefully, I mean, they're all close sometimes. Like there's been phases. They're all three best friends.

They're all close, but sometimes the girls kind of like, you know, split off. I will tell you, the girls at the playground are kind of feisty. They tell Griffin, Griffin just like walked over, was just like looking, he didn't touch anything that they were playing with, and they said, get away. Oh, get away.

And I was like, oh. So blind. He just like, he just wasn't a fit. He was just like, all right. Like, get away. And I was like, oh! So blind. He just like, he just wasn't a fan. He was just like, all right. Yes. Oh my God. Get away. I feel like your son is gonna be

so emotionally intelligent though, because I grew up with two brothers, and then my mom is an engineer, and she basically, like my dad's the sensitive one, my mom's the one who's like the enforcer around the house, okay? So like, I just did not understand women very much, because my mom is not like the typical, like she was just never emotional. And so like, yeah, I don't know. I feel like your son's going to be like set up to be like a really

good husband. Oh yeah. He's definitely the most sensitive. And he's the cutest little kid. Like he, he loves, um, he loves cooking with us. Anything that we're doing, it doesn't matter. He wants to help. So he's always helping. I'll be like putting on the sheets to the bed and he's just like, da da da da. Like, I don't know what I'm supposed to do but please show me how to do this.

I wanna do it. He loves shaving. We bought him a little toy shaver and anytime I'm shaving, he'll just, you know, with his toy shaver, he'll be doing this. It's so, he's so fun. All three of them are amazing. Okay, isn't it crazy how your kids? Copy everything you do. Oh, it's awesome because I play with Abby's hair cuz that like she that's something that she loves

That's her love language the other day Griffin started doing this on my hair and I was like like It was so sweet and then the other other day I came downstairs and he says, you're beautiful, mama. So sweet.

And I was like, I had such a big reaction. He said it again, he goes, you're beautiful. And I was like, Matt, it's so crazy how he's looking to you so much and wanting to replicate. And that's also such a heavy responsibility, but it's so cool. But he's probably seeing you help out and do all these things

and he just wants to do exactly what you're doing and it's so cool that you guys are setting such amazing examples for them too. Oh, thank you. Every parent though, it's just like, it does put more responsibility for us. It's like, oh my gosh, we really gotta pick up our game because they're watching every move now.

For sure. But it's hard when you're exhausted. It's hard to be a good parent when you are not getting sleep at night I mean, maybe that's just for me like for me if I don't get a full night's rest I just it just leaves me I don't know maybe just not as present like I don't like if I'm ever angry I don't like to take that out on other people. I just keep it inside, but I just get really quiet If I'm ever angry, I don't like to take that out on other people, I just keep it inside, but I just get really quiet. But even being really quiet is not the best version of myself because then I'm not being present, I'm not talking, I'm not communicating. How are you, how do you guys stay being great parents when you're exhausted?

That's a really good question. I don't know, I, this is so random, but the first thing that came to my head is getting up before the kids get up. For me, and getting to the gym for some reason is, makes my day 10 times better. Really? Like, that's, I mean, I don't know if that was the response you were looking for,

but I honestly, like, getting my workout in and getting my energy up in the morning, I wouldn't just say like the caffeine, that also helps. But yeah, it just helps me become a better productive parent, I feel like, and gets my energy, like any frustration I have out. I mean, they always say that working out is good for you, but like I've grown to love it, you know? Like, I said, like Abby has encouraged me to work out. She hasn't told me to. She's just, I've just seen her go to the gym five times a week and I'm like oh, I should probably go more than once a week and

There's something to be said about even if you're exhausted you go work out As long as you don't like kill yourself in the gym because I used to like go so hard I'd be like just dead the rest of the day But you know you push yourself at a moderate pace you get all this all this dopamine release in your head You feel better. I like that. That's really cool. I think the double side for that too is maybe just like doing something for yourself. So you're like ready to go before you go and like serve your children all day basically. And I think there's like something definitely too bad you know fill yourself up so then you can go and. And there's also something ingrained in her that because when they were when they were

Newborns there was no time for the gym like we were like oh totally we were sleeping There is a baby up 24 There was one baby or three bays or or two babies awake at all times a day not exaggerating There is a baby awake at all times of the day for months and months and months so someone was awake So what did you did you guys have like a in-law or parent move in to help? We moved in with my parents, which was, I don't know. I don't know how we could have done it without them. Yeah.

Through it without them. So they would do shifts with us and that would help a lot. But, but yeah, like, but what I was saying is even with that and Haley didn't have time to do anything for herself, she still was just this superhero mom. And I'm like, how are you? Cause I was absolutely exhausted. Like literally like running on fumes. Like I've never felt, I've never, I was never at the point in my life until I had triplets where I could fall asleep standing up is what it felt like. But she just kept going. I'm like, how are you still going? So what I'm trying to say is I like, there's something inside inside of of you. Maybe it's all moms that just keeps going.

And I don't know. I I don't think I have that when they're newborn, but you definitely did. Where you just you could go 24 7. Thank you to Lumi for sponsoring this portion of today's episode. I go to the gym five days a week and then I go and run errands. And that can be a real recipe for disaster and for not making friends because I am sweaty and stinky afterwards and I'm just like out in public like everything's okay but the reason I can do that is because I love Lumi's whole body deodorant and

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unplanned for 15% off your first purchase at lumedeodorant.com. That's code unplanned at L-U-M-E-D-E-O-D-O-R-A-N-T.com. Please support our show and tell them we sent you smell fresher, stay drier, and boost your confidence from head to toe with Lumi. But Haley, there was a point though when you were in the hospital, you just freshly birthed three human beings and I saw you said on social media that you felt like you failed them for some reason. Like it must have been like some sort of like motherly instinct where even though you were doing so so much and you were, yeah, like birthing babies, like you, I think you guys had a FaceTime call, right, for you to see them because you couldn't even get out of bed. You were stuck in bed.

Yeah. I hemorrhaged. I had a postpartum hemorrhage. So like I just had lost so much blood that I couldn't even stand up in the first 24 hours to go down to get, to stand up to get into a wheelchair. Like I couldn't even sit up in a wheelchair. I just maybe it was just like mama bear activated. I just like I you just don't know anything else. You know as a mom I was just like okay like this is my life now like I need to do anything I can to you know provide for these kids and make it happen you know. How did you go from immediately after giving birth feeling like feeling those feelings to then

going to being this super mom that's like waking up before her kids wake up and working out and yeah taking care of taking care of yourself because it seems like you needed to find some way to embody self-care in order to be the best mom for your kids. Yeah, I feel like I don't remember what point in time, but I felt like I was so overwhelmed with being a mom. I was like, okay, I need to take some time for myself and just start doing, even if it's little things, just doing little things for myself. And you've had those times, Mitchell's had those times too, where it's like, okay, just get out of the house, take time for yourself, and're you become a better parent when you prioritize yourself too, you know? And so I don't

I don't think there was a specific time that it really happened in like the switch. But I did feel like when I said that I felt like I felt like I felt my kids was because of my body going into labor at 28 weeks, I felt like I had filled them in some way, even though I know it's not my fault. But like there are those times when mom guilt kicks in and I just felt like I was failing them. But yeah, I don't know a specific time where I was just like, oh, now I'm just like, go get her mom, you know?

It was just kind of happened gradually, I guess. And Mitch, when did you start feeling your best self again? Like what type of switch took place for you to feel like, I don't know, like when did you start practicing self care and what was that self care? Was it the gym for you or was it something different? Yeah, I felt like when they were born that I just like, I didn't do anything but just focus on them

and worry about them to the point where it's very unhealthy for me. I lost so much weight because I wasn't eating because you know we had to go get dinner or go get lunch out of the hospital and I had dadgill of if I leave the hospital and go get Chick-fil-A whatever that's an hour away from my kids and they need us there. They always said, be here as much as possible because they hear your voice and holding them is really important for a premature baby and all babies. So like I just, yeah, when I started to do self care

and really focus on myself more was probably like a year ago. They were probably a year and a half years old. Like it took a while to start doing things on my own, like going on a run or even going to the gym or hanging out with some friends. Like everything I felt guilty about. Well, I will say too, all parents in general, if you feel guilty about anything,

it means you're a good parent. Like if you feel guilty about anything, it means you're a good parent. Like if you feel guilty like doing something, it just means that you're a good parent because you're worried about your kids. Like if you're, you know what I'm saying? Like, I don't know, there's so many times where like, oh my gosh, am I a bad mom? Because like I'm taking time for myself,

but it's like, no, that makes you a better parent, prioritizing yourself because you're trying to put energy into yourself to make you a better parent. It's like putting the mask on on an airplane if there's ever a drop in cabin pressure so that then you can help your kids. Because if you first help your kids but then you pass out because you're not breathing, your kids can't get bring you back and guess what? Your kids need you. So it's literally, I think whenever I think about self-care, I think about literally whenever the flight attendant on an airplane says, hey remember, put on your mask first and then once you're helped you can help other people. I feel like that is a perfect

analogy to life. You cannot help other people unless you first help yourself. I agree. And you well you can, but there's a limit to it and you burn out and you're done and then you're no longer to help and then you're no longer able to serve. Yeah. Mom to mom, what is postpartum like after triplets? Oh my gosh, my, I mean, I just, I think that I did experience a little bit

of the postpartum depression, but I don't know if it was because my kids were in the NICU and we were going through all that traumatic stuff or if it was like actual postpartum depression or if it was just like depression in general, you know? But I think that my body just kind of went into fight or flight in that moment. Like I said, like just mama bear,

I was just doing anything. Like I just, it's kind of just like the switch went off on me and it's like, it doesn't matter. Like I don't matter, it's just them. Like I just did's kind of just like the switch went off of me and it's like it doesn't matter like I don't matter it's just them like I just did anything to help them. And you're recovering from a c-section. I was recovering from a c-section and surprisingly even though I did like have that postpartum hemorrhage and stuff I recovered relatively quickly. Superwoman No. The doctor's like how on earth are you walking right now? It was good I I was I was surprised like after hearing other experiences about C-sections like I was surprised

I I don't and yeah looking back. I don't remember any of that Like I just remember the Nikki with the kids so well is Haley's love language words of affirmation. No Yours is like is it service? That's your biggest love language? I don't know, that's a good question. I think it's service, like not like service. That one's always like weird when people say, but like you really like, like when I opened the door for her, like that means a lot to her, which is awesome. I love that.

So yeah. Or like if you made breakfast for the whole family and like got her coffee. Things like that. That would mean a lot to her. She loves it. That's the, we're the exact same way. Would you agree with that?

I hope that. Yeah, probably. Yeah, I honestly don't know. I think so. Yeah. Do you know what mine is? Words of affirmation. Yeah probably. I think yours is words of affirmation. Am I wrong? No. Wait I'm wrong. What's yours? Physical touch. Yeah for sure. Yeah. I feel like every guy says physical touch but like I feel like there's a difference between like intimacy and physical touch. Yes. Because like Abby's is physical touch so she loves it when I play with her hair. She doesn't want to get laid, she just wants to play with her hair.

I know exactly what you're saying. I love it when Hailey scratches my back. It's my favorite thing in the entire world. Things like that. That's my love language. To me it's like, oh, she's in a good mood because she's scratching my back right now. Or, I don't know.

Yeah, does it fully mean just intimacy just okay that makes sense that makes sense because every guy's like I love physical touch it's like no you don't okay you're actually words of affirmation you idiot like that's mine that's because like I like to give compliments because I like to receive compliments yeah so that's I so I I've completely misdiagnosed you I was like this is my fellow words of affirmation guy. I wonder if it is. We need to do that test. Yeah, we haven't even looked into that.

We didn't even know each other's what it was. We just barely got into the, is it enneagram? Enneagram? Yeah. We just barely, like, our friends talked to us about that. We're like, we need to take those quizzes and figure out what we are, because it's interesting to learn. I think it is good because, like say it helps our marriage and stuff too.

Like learning those things. Oh, it's really helpful to understand communication styles, especially communication styles, because I've realized after five years of marriage, Abby and I communicate extremely differently. And she could look at me in a way that I communicate as, oh, she hates me right now. She doesn't like me, and then I get defensive and I say something weird, and then we end up having an argument when it's like she was literally looking at me that way

just because of this thing. Like it had nothing to do with me. So I think communication, like figuring out how your spouse communicates is so helpful because I think communication is like the cause of 99% of conflict, honestly. For sure. Probably, for sure. Probably.

Especially when we were married, we got married pretty fast and pretty young and figuring out how we're supposed to communicate with each other, you know, when you're with someone 24 seven, like that it was hard. We've definitely learned a lot. And you guys said you got married fast. So like, are we talking like dating for like two years and then getting married after like a year like, because that's what we did and we got married at 20 that's pretty fast because that and people are like whoa you guys are crazy like when people hear

our story like you guys are crazy you guys got married so young oh my gosh it's so crazy 20 and 21 two years of dating one year of engagement so for you guys what was that we were met and married within six months. Met? Hi I'm Mitchell. Hi I'm Haley. Six months later there's rings on her finger. Legally married. How long did it take? Three months later there was a ring on my finger. How many days did it take you from the day you met to say I want to marry you? A month? Maybe a month. 30 days. Probably 30 days.

Bro, they should have made a TV show about you guys. Listen, I know that that sounds so crazy, but to me it was so obvious, like I love her. I love her so much. No, wait, tell them how we met though. That's my favorite story. Okay, so this is actually kind of a cool story. So I was on spring break with my friends

and we were going on a cruise, on a carnival cruise to... Out of California. Out of California, somewhere in Mexico. And we got to the, to the, wherever city we were in in California, day early to make sure that, just so we didn't miss the cruise, right? So the day before one of my buddies knew of a wedding

that was happening in Malibu. He said, hey, like there's a wedding going on in Malibu like I kind of want to go to it And I was like, oh, I kind of want to go to it too Like because I have nothing to do my formal clothes on or formal clothes in my backpack for the for the cruise for those nice Dinners, you know, so um, I decided to go to this wedding and crash it. Okay. Yeah, I was like How do you just decide to go to a wedding? I wasn't invited to the wedding. I was like, I'm just gonna go to this wedding and crash it. Okay, yeah, I was like, how do you just decide to go to a wedding? I wasn't invited to the wedding. I was like, I'm just gonna go to this wedding and crash it.

That's like wedding crashers, dude. You're like, oh, gee, you're the reason they made that movie. In my head, I was like, we're gonna be super respectful. I'm not supposed to be here, but we're not gonna cause a scene. Mostly we just wanna dance

and have a nice dinner, hopefully, right? So I show up to this wedding and I see this this really pretty girl who was Haley and she was a bridesmaid and I'm just there. I'm not supposed to be there. No one knows who I am and I literally turned my friends and I'm like that's the prettiest girl I've ever seen. And they're like, well you should go ask her out at some point in the night and I was so scared the whole night to ask her out because she was so pretty and I was like starstruck by this woman.

And later in the night, she was, we're eating dinner and I'm like eating dinner at this table with the name where someone's supposed to sit. But I waited for it to all the seats were filled and I took a seat where no one was sitting because I'm not supposed to be at this wedding. I didn't want to be like annoying or anything. Like I was trying to be as respectful as possible. So I sit down and I'm just eating next to all this wedding. I didn't want to be like annoying or anything. Like I was trying to be as respectful as possible. So I sit down and I'm just eating next to all these people.

I don't know. And at some point I got up and I just talked to her because I thought she was pretty. I just said hi. Like something super nonchalant. Then later in the night, I really, really, really wanted to ask her out and hang out that night while we were in California. And they were doing the bouquet toss and the garter toss.

And they did the bouquet toss first and she caught the... I caught it. She caught the bouquet. And I told all my friends, I'm like, this is perfect. Cause if I catch the garter, I can ask her out. It's like, and she has to say yes, because that's like a fairy tale type thing. This is a movie.

Yes. So they do the garter and all my friends box out all the people behind them, like the people that were supposed to be at the wedding. And there's a picture of it, of all my friends doing this and I'm just standing in front of them. So the garter just comes straight into my hand and I catch it. And immediately I'm like, hey, where's that pretty blonde girl? So I start searching for Haley and I say, hey, like you got the bouquet. I caught the garter

You know what this means like we got to go on a date and she says I'm so sorry Like I would love to but I can't cuz I'm not from California. I'm from Utah And I was like I'm from Utah. What are you doing here? So funny just the biggest coincidence would she like respectfully trying to say no That's so funny. Just the biggest coincidence. Was she like respectfully trying to say no? Oh, that's a good question. No.

I was just like, oh shoot, like I wish I could, I thought he was from California because like my friend who was getting married, both of her family sides were from California, but she just lived in Utah at the time. So we, I mean, that's why their wedding was there. And so I was like, oh, I was assuming that he was from California, but he was from Utah and it's like, oh, well, perfect. Did you think California, but he was from Utah and it's like, oh well, perfect Did you think he was cute? Um, yeah, uh-huh. Yeah, I mean he's still he's still cute No kiss for me like Abby and I met when we were kids and so I never like thought of her as anything more than

A friend, but then we we met through theater and met through this like summer theater. So one summer we met We were just friends and then like four years later No, it was three years ago three years years later, we had both grown up, we'd both gone through puberty, we'd both had changed a ton. And I'm like, damn, this girl's pretty. And then I asked her out. So that for me, it's funny how guys are,

we're so dumb, we're like, oh, that girl's pretty? She's amazing. Some people can be pretty, but actually not a good person. So I'm glad that we both it worked out for us. Yeah, I did it. Do you know what's so funny? I actually remember we had a girl take a picture of us after just a random lady and we still have that picture but she goes, oh wins the wedding. That's what she said to us and I'm like, well six months later we're married. That is epic. Yeah, that is literally a movie. It That is my favorite story ever. I know.

Crashed a wedding. That's so cute. Caught the bouquet, caught the garter, asked her out. And that night we actually, I mean, because he still had nothing to do. I was there, like, I mean, my friend obviously had just gotten married. Like I'm just still in California. And so that night we actually just hot tubbed together and just chatted and then he went on his cruise, came home and we hung out ever since, every day.

Okay, so if you're watching this podcast right now and you were a guy, which is probably rare, cause this is like all women, but if you're a guy and you're trying to ask a girl out, make sure she ends up being a bridesmaid at the wedding, make sure that her friends are in on it so that she gets them okay. And then when you get the garter, cause your friends are in on it too, then you guys can get married. Cause that's what you guys did. And it worked out.

I thought my whole life I'm like, I'm going to get married off of Tinder and there's nothing wrong with that. But that's what I guys and it worked out. I thought my whole life. I'm like, I'm gonna get married off of tinder And there's nothing wrong with that nothing wrong with that's what I thought was gonna happen Yeah, and then it was just kind of a cool story. So yeah hung out every single day got got engaged three months. Mary later married Three months after that's funny. It's funny. You've mentioned tinder because we interviewed Alex and John on this podcast They literally met through tinder hooking up Yeah and John on this podcast and they literally met through Tinder hooking up and they ended up getting married. I love that. Also a movie. Yeah, also a movie. Different rating on that movie.

If you are a movie maker, whatever that job title is, you should make a movie off those stories. Two completely different stories. Yeah, it was fun. That's crazy. So six months is the total number from where we met and got married. And when you got married, was it amazing or was it hard

because you guys didn't know how to live together? I mean, it was, everything seems like it's been smooth. Yeah. I mean, it was, I mean, when you start living together, I mean, you have things. Like, he used to, I mean, he still kind of does it. He puts the laundry like two feet away from the laundry basket.

Yeah, Matt does that. He's like, I'm letting it dry out. Listen, low, listen. That's disgusting. No, listen. Look, you've got to stop doing that. Listen. OK. There's a reason. He's like, I'm letting it dry out. Listen, low, listen. That's disgusting. No, listen. Look, you've got to stop doing that. Sometimes there's, listen. Okay.

There's a reason. There's a reason. Sometimes you might wear it again if it's not that dirty. Yes. Or sometimes it is dirty enough if it sits there long enough so it's like, okay, now it's officially dirty. Or. So there's like a gray area of when laundry should be in the basket or next to it.

There's kind of like a scientific method to it too, because like if you sweat a lot at the gym and your shirt's all wet, you don't want to infect the rest of the laundry with your sweaty shirt. You gotta put it on top of the basket with the basket clothes so it's not even in there, but it's like, it's airing out.

Because it makes the hamper stink worse. Bingo. I would give you a high five right now. I'm happy we're communicating this. Everything's intentional. Everything's intentional that I do with my laundry. I'm glad we could finally solve this mystery. Not everyone knows why we do that.

You guys have been married for five years? Well, I guess, is it, how many years is it now? Six? Yeah. Did we still have six here? Yeah, we did. Time flies. Oh wow, six.

Okay, we've been married for five and a half. Yeah. Wow. That's so crazy. Thank you to Chime for sponsoring this portion of our episode. Nothing irks me more than paying for fees. I don't know if you guys have ever bought something online

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it on a podcast. I had no idea what it was called. Clomed. So Clomed is the medication you were on to get pregnant when you were going through PCOS, right? Yes Chlomed does that have side effects of causing you to have triplets? Like is that why you got you had triplets? Yeah, so but Having triplets on chlomed is extremely rare And I think that what happened we talked with our doctor about this is we have twins that run on both sides of the family My dad's a twin. Yeah, and then PCOS, like you don't ovulate. And so hormones and all that stuff are already so messed up, you know? And so when I got on Clomid, I mean, it didn't work the first two months.

And then the third month, it gave me the triplets. So gave me the triplets. Third time's the charm. That, wow. What is the percentage of people that have triplets on Clomid? Oh, I think it's like 0.00 something. That's probably the percentage of people that have triplets on Chlomed? Oh, I think it's like 0.00 something. That's probably what they say and out here everyone on Chlomed is getting triplets like,

hey, I got triplets, you got triplets, hey, okay. Yeah. I mean, people are pretty shocked when they ask like how we, usually they think it's IVF. Because I feel like IVF is more common to have triplets. I've also met people who are spontaneous, who just randomly are trying for their fourth kid and more common to have triplets. I've also met people who are spontaneous, who just randomly are trying for their fourth kid and then they have triplets. I actually have heard of that. I actually know someone.

That's my uncle's family. It's crazy. Yeah, so crazy. They were trying for a boy. There was their third, no, third or fourth, and they got triplet girls. They have seven girls. I can't imagine having an additional one

on top of triplets. So I see triplet families with, or even any family, it doesn't matter for Triplets, like parents with four kids, five kids, six kids, seven kids, and I'm like, oh my gosh, that is insane. Rockstar parents. That's insane. When you guys found out you were pregnant, sorry,

I keep going back to this moment, but did you guys, were you living in your parents' basement at the time? Is that when you found out? Yeah, so we were renovating the duplex. Like we had B out? Yeah, so we were we were renovating the duplex, like we had bought a duplex, but we were renovating it. So we were living in his parents basement. Got it. And then when she found out that we were pregnant with the triplets, she came to us and was like, listen, like, stay here for a little bit longer, because you guys are need some help. And I'm so grateful that we said yes, because that was the hardest time for her. Oh, my gosh. They

sound like amazing people. They're awesome. Because if I like, I don't know, someone who says stay with me while you have your triplets, like that sounds like a very selfless person to me. Yeah. And my sister was also upstairs too. She moved in because she was also in the process of moving somewhere. So my sister was also living upstairs. I was so lucky. Like we had a bunch of in-house people helping and her family came over. So we had a community helping us. It takes a village. Guys, I love that. I love how people surrounded you when you were going through that because that just gets me freaking pumped about human humankind. Okay.

Like the other day we got, we, this is the sports subject. We got stuck in the snow the other day. Our car, we were running late for the airport. Car gets stuck in the snow. We can't get out of the snow. I'm knocking on neighbors doors. This is, we're in white fish at the white fish ski resort. Please don't, we're going to have to tell this story later because

you're missing so many. Okay. We'll get, we'll tell it on our podcast This will be the one minute elevator pitch story but basically long story short all these neighbors just came up and just started helping us push and Started like helping helping check on our kids because our kids were like Abby was pretty panicked so then I think our kids got a little scared and then the neighbors were like just comforting our kids and like everyone's just being so nice and I'm like and this lady just had a little scared and then the neighbors were like just comforting our kids and like everyone's just being

So nice, and I'm like and this lady just had a cigarette in her hand And she's like the sweet grandma like these are grand these are grandparents from Florida that flew in to just enjoy their vacation And they're out here helping us push our car out of the snow Okay, so the fact that people surrounded you guys when you needed it most, just like these, this family, these grandparents from Florida did for us, like it's just, I love people, dude. I love, I love, I love being a human. Yeah. I actually, this just reminded me, like we have so many random meals and diapers and wipes just showing up at the door. And I wish I could thank every single person that, you know,

like did all that stuff. People, people would knock on our door and run away And there would be a pile of diapers like taller than me no no no nothing and we to this day We don't know who was doing it. We were just being nice fun fact We literally just this last week bought our very first pack of wipes Because we had wipes last us until just barely. Because of how generous people were. And you have three kids.

Wow. We also, those wipes and diapers at one point took up half our garage. Yes. A lot of surge. We actually did find out the lady who was behind a lot of it, not all of it, because there's a bunch of anonymous people

donating diapers and wipes to us. But Deb Coffee, you donated thousands of diapers to us, so thank you if you're watching this. She is the sweetest woman. So, Deb Coffee. Can everyone spam the comments right now with go Deb? Or if you're listening on Apple, can you just leave us a review?

I don't care what star rating you give us, give us a one star. I literally couldn't hear less. No, no, let's do five. Let's do five stars. Whatever you feel we deserve, just say go Deb.. Just say, go Deb. Go Deb. Deb is the best. Deb is five stars. Thank you, Deb. She sounds like a saint. She's my neighbor going up and Deb Coffee, we love you. That's awesome. We love you, Deb Coffee. That's awesome.

So having triplets in your belly? Do you have like loose skin? Cause I have loose skin like from one. Like it's just, you do? Yes, yeah I do. I, I You look amazing. I feel, you're so nice. You look amazing.

You're so nice. I feel like it was, I mean it's been gradual, like the healing, you know, but it's amazing what women's bodies can do. Like truly amazing. And I just, I loved being pregnant with them, surprisingly. Like it was painful and stuff. And like Mitchell at night had to help me roll over in bed

because they were so heavy, but- No, like you need to explain that, what that was like. No, literally they were huge. And like to walk around, I literally had to have like a belt and like towards the end, I'd had to hold my belly when I walked around because it was just so crazy. But my favorite part of being pregnant was just like, they had personalities when they were in my stomach.

Totally, totally. Tommy was so feisty and she's so feisty now. It's just so crazy how you could tell. I told Matt that. 1000%. And I could tell each baby. It was so weird and I talked to people about it and like they know, you know, but it's just, yeah, it's, pregnancy

is crazy and being pregnant with triplets was nuts. It just feels like a dream on them. And you made milk for three babies? Yes, I exclusively pumped for 14 months for the triplets. I was, um, I overfilled the NICU freezer. She filled. I was just a human cow, honestly. Like I pumped enough milk for, at the beginning for eight babies. I think it's called octuplets.

She was producing that much milk. Like I can't even explain to you guys, we had to buy deep freezers. Yeah. For our crush. Because we filled up our entire fridge, our entire freezer, and then we had to buy a deep freezer to start storing it like, I mean, hundreds of gallons. My body just knew somehow, you know?

And I just felt at the time that like, breast milk was so important for them because they were in the NICU and I was like, they just need the extra, whatever extra I can do, you know? And so I just, I pumped on top of that and it was crazy, but. Oh my gosh Yeah, I totally know the pumping game and the breastfeeding game. Yeah, it's we ourselves got a deep freezer It was it's crazy, but there's a new

Do I not do I wait till I'm for sure done like I don't know I I'm Cause I'm going back and forth. I'm like, do I do it? Do I not? Do I wait till I'm for sure? Duh. Like I don't know. I'm like, I'm entertaining it. I got a consultation and I left feeling not super excited. Oh, shoot. I know. Wait, now I got insecure.

Like what if that person- But you said those cause the technician. No, no, no, no, no. Don't say anything. Oh, okay. I won't trash talk this person. Sorry. I'm sure you're great.

No, I think she was great. I think it's an internal battle that I need to sit on for a little longer, but you're happy with it? Very happy with it. I honestly, I was at the point after I was done breastfeeding the kids that I felt like I couldn't wear a sports bra, I couldn't wear a bikini. Like I couldn't wear tops without, I mean,

feeling self-conscious. And so I was like, I mean, it just made me feel better. It made me happier. And so I was like, you know what, you do you. Whatever makes you happier, just do it. Yeah. So. Okay.

That's good to hear. Yeah. Because someone, my friend told me, I totally agree with her. So I don't think she said anything wrong, but she was like, you have the craziest breast transformation of anyone that I know that's had children. I was like, yes. thank you for acknowledging me. I feel seen right now. What's funny is like everyone,

you get like hate comments, people on social media. I don't know why this is, but I don't know if this ever happened to you guys, but people on social media will sometimes say not very nice stuff. I don't know why. I don't really actually know why that happens, but anyway, people would be like, whoa, this girl got a boob job all this time and they were natural. They were literally natural.

And people would roast you. They're like, she got a boob job. She probably sucks. She's probably insecure. And it's like, whoa, everybody, she has completely authentic boobs. These are real. She probably sucks. It was so weird. Guys, these are real boobs. Why are we like talking to my wife about her boobs? I just wanted to ask you that, mom to mom, woman to woman. I was like...

I love them. That's just how I feel about it. Mitchell, how do you feel about them? I think they're great. I'm sorry. I need to excuse myself. I'm very pro. I swear. I've only drank this prop today, I swear. But she came to me and she goes, I think I want a boob job. I was like, yeah.

He's like trying to hold it in, how his excitement. I love that for you, babe. I think that's a good idea. That is so funny. It's really common in Utah too, right? I've heard that it's like the plastic surgery. Wait, is Utah the capital of plastic surgery? I heard it is for Botox, but I don't know about plastic surgery. Wait, is Utah the capital of plastic surgery?

I heard it is for Botox, but I don't know about plastic surgery. I mean, I love Botox too. I don't know. Everyone looks so nice and they're all, well, everyone looks so nice and they act so nice. Any explanation for why everyone's so beautiful in Utah? Maybe we should have moved to Utah. Maybe moving to Arizona was a mistake.

Come to Utah is so fun. Yeah, you should come to Utah. We love Utah. And I don't even know why I love Utah so much, but it is. Yeah, it's great. There's lots of families. The weather is great. We love the snow. don't even know why I love Utah so much, but it is. Yeah, it's great. The weather is great. There's lots of families and swigs. Like we love the snow.

There's a swig. We love soda. We love swig. Do you guys know there's a million types of swigs? Like knockoff swigs, like competitors to swigs. Oh, you guys have it here in Arizona. We have swigs. And I love it.

There's a lot of other ones. I put coffee creamer in my soda now and it's delicious. It's so good. It actually is really good. I don't know about that one. What? You don't like coffee creamer in your soda? What the frick's wrong with you? I don't think to do that. I like Swig but I get the ones that are like the strawberry water like flavor. Oh those are good too like the water flavors. Yes. I just can't handle how expensive Swig is. So Hailey, I remember she came back with the soda whatever Yeah, I just can't handle how expensive swig is so Haley. I remember she came back with the soda whatever and I was like I was like, what is it? What was it? Like your favorite drink? Just very common like coconut and and

Dr. Pepper, whatever dirty dr. Pepper, whatever it's called for you But like I feel like people like living in New York like what the crap are they doing? Because people in Utah don't drink coffee. Like that's why like I think that's what isn't that why? people in Utah don't drink coffee like that's why like I think that's why isn't that why like this is the soda shop? I don't know why it's so everyone loves it. It's just kind of like a refreshing drink you know like the carbonation. See you guys make me want to convert to LDS but then I feel like I get kicked out like the next day for drinking coffee so I probably should. I want to be so like you guys are so nice you guys are so nice. You guys are so nice. You're so nice. You guys are so sweet. But how much was her drink? I don't know, but I just think a can of soda is like what, a dollar at McDonald's to get the big...

Oh yeah. And then Swig is like six and I'm like why don't you just go get six drinks at McDonald's and then buy a little pump thing with coconut. You can never underestimate the power of a special drink. It's true. It can really turn a whole day around. It can do a lot of other things for you. It's true. It can really turn a whole day around. It can do a lot of other things for you.

It's totally fine. It's my mom run. It's her mom run, but I've always just thought, what if we just bought the coconut thing at our house? Not the same. You don't want to tiptoe into that area. I just let her do it because apparently there's a big difference. I don't know.

I'm curious, what are things that people unintentionally like say that are unintentionally like rub you the wrong way as parents to triplets or like oh gosh like are things people like it they're like Accidentally being insensitive or like you're like this is just something that we hear all the time It's actually just kind of annoying at this point. How did you conceive them? Oh? We're just like what? I mean, I'm used to that one now, but like people, the worst thing that I hear is like people saying, that's my worst nightmare.

Oh. I'm like, I'm sorry, but they're a blessing for me. Like I'm so, and I can see that. Like I'm not going to sit and get mad at someone. I was just like, oh, like I love them so much. You know, like I'm- To be fair, when we found out we was just like, oh, like I love them so much. You know, like I'm- To be fair, when we found out we're having triplets, like we already said, we weren't that excited.

So I understand that people don't want triplets, but now that we have them, it's like, well, you know, they say like you're living my worst nightmare. And it's like, well, it's actually like the world's greatest thing. And I wish everyone had litters like we did. Yeah, it's literal. You know, so yeah, it's awesome.

But we do get that a lot. Do you wanna tell them what that guy said to you in Costco that one time? Oh yeah, so Costco. We go to Costco and for some reason everyone just feels so, just they can ask us whatever they want. So you're like, hey, how did you conceive? It's like, like those are real, like,

Wait, so did you guys have sex to have your children? They're probably saying stuff like that. I'm like? It's like, like that. Those are real. Like, wait, so did you guys have sex to have your children? I don't know what it is. But this guy comes up to me and he goes, are those triplets? And I'm like, yes, they are. And he goes, are you snipped? Just like that fast. Immediately after and I'm like, um, no, that's to beat you.

Sorry, I did not like, did that piss you off when he said that? Did that make you really mad? No, because we- We just started laughing. We don't like causing any, you know, like we're just like chill, whatever. We're never gonna see this guy again. But it was just kind of like, dude, why did you just say that? Yeah. No, I'm not. Did that just happen? Are you sniffed? Yeah. What a way to meet somebody. How's it going? Are those triplets? Are you sniffed? No, I a way to meet somebody. How's it going? Are those triplets? Are you sniffed? No, I'm not kidding.

That's how it went. That's the exact sequence. How many seconds are we talking? Was this like? Five seconds. Five seconds? And then it was like, oh, that's crazy. Nice to meet you, Con.

He's gonna go buy a $5 Costco chicken. You probably got the $5 Costco chicken. You probably would. Everyone has one. Everyone has one in their card. Do you guys get the $5 Costco chicken? You do. Oh yeah, that's so good. You're one of those guys too. Oh yeah. So good. Do you guys not buy those? We actually do not buy the $5 Costco chickens. It feels wrong to my soul. We feel like we're hurting the chickens. No, no. That's it. Oh yeah. Abby, I care about animal rights. Abby doesn't give a frick about animals. Matt, shut up. Do you guys eat meat? Let's transition from the chicken to the hot dog. Do you buy the dollar hot dog?

I don't get the chicken because they taste like hot dogs. Do you think the chicken tastes like hot dogs? Yeah. Oh no. Yeah, it's okay. I was pregnant so maybe that just had something to do with it. I didn't know how to taste. And now that you said that,

I always think about hot dogs when I eat the Costco chicken. So I just can't. So everyone can too. I can't do it. I was pregnant, we were eating Costco chicken, I was like, this tastes exactly like hot dogs right now It's like

They're balance sheet though. Now I'm nervous to try the chicken again We had to bought one Everyone listening to this is going to be ruined on Don't scare her from the chicken Bro you just know those chickens are like pumped with hormones and freaking whatever I know I know I know You don't want to read the label on that I don't want to look into it I don't want to think about it Don't watch the want to look into it. I don't want to think about it

Don't watch the food videos where they show like all the chickens That's so sad anyway, we should probably try to eat more vegetables Yeah, okay don't want to. Yeah, OK. Good talk. Well, day to day now, are you guys like, you're getting out more or you're still in the house? I mean, it still is a hassle to get out of the house. And honestly, it kind of scares me too, being a mom by myself with triplets and loading.

I mean, any mom with a couple of kids, it makes you nervous kind of putting them into the car and then like turning around to get the other one. And you know, there's scary people in the world, you know? So I mean, I like taking them places by myself that are like, I don't know, toddler playgrounds that are enclosed that I know really well or like meeting people,

but I don't take them out by myself super often. And that's why I always come up with things like to do at the house. Like we have this indoor bouncy house and like stair slides and just fun things to entertain them there because people don't understand it's so hard to take them out of the house. Can you send me your link?

It's probably linked on your, it's probably linked somewhere, but your stair slide. I saw that on your TikTok. I want to get it for our kids. They would love it. Have you gone down this year? And adults can go down it? Oh yeah.

But you have to be careful because adults have broken their tailbones on that thing. Stop, there's no way I can get on that thing. I have a massive tailbone. My aunt snapped her foot in half when she was going down a slide at a house we stayed at in Branson, Missouri. So I'm from Missouri

and we would always take trips there with all my cousins. And so yeah, you're right, slides are very dangerous. For dull bodies. Because my aunt just was like, I'm sending it everybody. We're like, yeah, go for the slide. Oh my God. It's kind of cool when your vacation home has a slide in it and she, like her foot, her foot was like over here.

It was like, and the bone was like sticking out. It was pretty gnarly. So that was a fun, that was a great family vacation It was like in the bone was like sticking out. It was pretty gnarly So that was a fun. That was a great family. You'll be fine. Okay, so crazy. It's so fun though So yeah, like I always try and come up with a lot of activities for them at home Just because it's hard they and your children wear helmets. They did wear helmets Okay So because they were born so early like I mean they were laying in those incubators a lot like you can only hold them for like their specific times and stuff that you can hold them and so Okay, so because they were born so early like I mean they were laying in those incubators a lot

Like you can only hold them for like their specific times and stuff that you can hold them And so I mean they were laying on their heads a lot and your heads forming at that stage So it's more than you can move their head from one side to another So if they laid like this for a couple hours in their head, you know They have all the socks forming it literally starts to literally starts to fly in your head It's very common actually it is common Like even full term babies will sometimes like lay down in the crib for too long like this and they'll get a flat back head You know back of their head and so they wore helmets for gosh how long I don't remember but it was honestly Such a blessing because when they were in that stage of like pulling themselves up onto things and falling over, I'm like, Oh my gosh, this has saved my life because I wouldn't be catching kids from

falling over all the time. Totally. So yeah, helmets for nice. We actually talk about that. That's like, I'll take the kids for a bike ride and then take them to the park. And he's like, someone just leave their helmets on them because at the park they fall down all the time. We're like, he's like, it's probably saved them from some major injuries. There is a time where Griffin face planted into it. Like one of those like, you know those McDonald's pulls they have at the drive through, it's like a big yellow pole, so you don't hit like the McDonald's sign.

This was at McDonald's? It was not at McDonald's, but it was just like one of those pulls, oh, it was like one of those like near a parking lot, so that cars can't like drive into, by accident drive into like a playground. He straight up is like running and like trips and just like wax his head on the pole.

Thank goodness he had his helmet on cause I just never took it off. I mean, I was, you know, when you're a parent, you're busy and you're like, yeah, I'll just leave that helmet on. He'll, we're going to be here 20 minutes and we're going to go back on the bike. But dude, like that helmet has saved my son.

So they had them for over a year. A while. Yeah, it was a long time. It was probably about a year. Okay. Elliott's was for sure. Because he actually had it. So Elliott had a different condition. It's called craniosynostosis, kind of a long word, but his skull was, you know how babies have soft spots on their heads? So his skull fused early and he had to have surgery on that to remove part of his skull so his brain could grow. So he wore his helmet longer and he still has checkups for that but he's totally fine now. It was scary at the time but I'm so grateful

for modern medicine honestly because now his head can just, his brain can grow normally, you know? It's amazing. But yeah. And our kids have normal shaped, like, it's weird to say, but just like normal shaped heads. Because if not, so one of our girls, her head was, because she was always on one of her sides. Yeah.

So she, they called it a toaster head. Because it's literally just flat on all sides. It was really skinny and tall. I've never heard of that before. Uh-huh. A toaster head? Toaster head. So the helmet would put a lot of pressure on the top of her head

and there was no pressure on the side. So when her head was growing because of her brain, it would hit the top of the helmet and he'd start to grow to the side. Wow. So it literally shapes your head to be a perfect. And is that literally just an aesthetic thing? Like, does it matter if your head is a toaster head?

They don't know. We asked them that. No, I think it was an aesthetic thing. Like, I mean, Elliot's was obviously medical, head is a toaster head? They don't know, we asked them that. I think it was an aesthetic thing. I mean, Elliot's was obviously medical, but yeah, I think that it just makes it look normal. Yeah, well, I think most people wanna look like everybody else.

Yeah. Most people don't wanna be like, yo, if you could have a toaster head or a regular head, which would you choose? Yeah, most people don't wanna. Most people probably wouldn't be like, you know what, sign me up for toaster head. And they asked the option, they said,

do you wanna do this? It's not covered by insurance, but do you want to go for it? This because we don't know if it will have any effects at all. And we're like, well, yeah, well, yeah, because I think they would be happy with it when they're older. Right. So, yeah. Yeah, I think I forget if it were like if it was me or one of my siblings. But I think my dad, when one of us was younger, was worried about like some feature with my like ears or something,

but he just didn't, like as a parent, you want your kids to fit in with everybody else because you don't want them to get like made fun of or bullied in school. I totally see why you guys would put a helmet on your kid because you just want your kid to have the best life. You know? Yeah.

Totally. That's, how much was that? If that wasn't covered, so the $7 million hospital bill didn't cover the toaster head thing? It should have. I actually don't remember how toaster head? I don't remember how much it was either. I have no idea. I can't remember. Because Elliott's was covered. Yeah so technically it was only the girls that we had to pay for. I remember that they did help us out a lot though because they I don't know they I think they had some sort of like discounts or like something. Because there's

multiple kids with helmets. Oh yeah. have three kids sorry you have three kids I need helmets so we'll like we'll cut you it won't be a million dollars we'll just be half a million. Like a two for one deal I don't know. It's crazy like when you have to start paying like now when they start turning two sometimes you have to start paying for things like activities like yeah going into college like all of those, like, you know, who knows where life will lead them, but it's going to go from zero to trip three times. What I hate right now is clothes because it's not like we can hand them down.

You know, I'm like, I have to buy all three at the same time. And then they grow out of their stuff so fast. I'm like, oh, you know, it's fine. At least like your bench though, like maybe, I don't know if you do like gender neutral stuff at all, but like with the gender neutral clothes, you could probably just have a bank of that, cause any kid could wear it.

Like a kid, you know, has boogers all over his shirt, and you're like, ah, we need to take that shirt off. Like you just grab from the bench, the gender neutral bench. Matt, you put our kids in the most random clothes. Sometimes I leave for like an hour, and I come back and I'm like, do you know Augie was wearing a six to 12 month long sleeve shirt the other day?

Well, there's a new style for two year olds. I was doing this. Augie is big. He's so chubby and six to 12 months, he is actually 18 months. And I was like, what is he wearing? His whole belly is sticking out. And I was like, how did you even get this on him? Well, you guys heard about the new style, right? But if it's sitting in the closet, Matt thinks it works. So it's, there's this new style for two-year-olds. It's called a pajama casual. And it's where when your kid blows through their pajama pants,

you put them in some khakis. And then it's like their business casual, but also in pajamas at the same time. They have the pajama top on, khakis, like the most wacky stuff. It's a vibe. It's a vibe. I've definitely never done that. You sometimes put's a vibe, it's a vibe. Definitely never done that, have we? No. You sometimes put them, I think it's a dad thing. I don't know.

No, I had that tiny shirt and he was wearing Griffin's jeans. Oh my gosh. Imagine the look happening right now. I was like, what is going on? The last thing I wanted to talk about with you guys is you mentioned somewhere, I forget where it was, but you mentioned that you guys witnessed

a miracle with your kids. And I feel like, I don't know, me personally, I'm like, whoa, like you mentioned that you guys witnessed a miracle with your kids and I feel like, I don't know, me personally, I'm like, whoa, like you don't really hear about miracles happening every day. So I just want to know that story and I want to know what happened. They did so many tests on them when they were that little. Like they have to have heart tests, brain tests, lung tests, all these things to make sure like that they can intervene if they need to.

Things that you never think about. Yeah. Yeah. And so they did that brain scan and found those movement issues that your kids have movement issues. It could be anything from like a hand twitch to cerebral palsy. Yeah. And we will not know until they get older. And of course, we're sobbing. It was the worst moment of our lives. We asked if there was any way that it could be reversed, if there was anything we could do to help them to not have this, and they told us no.

This is for life. That this is for life. And then the severity of it is locked in, right? So you can't make it better. Yeah. And so we honestly, like it was, like I said, the worst moment ever. And we were devastated for how long?

Two weeks, maybe. It felt like an eternity, honestly, I don't know. And we just, they went back a couple weeks later and did the exact same scan and it was gone. And both, I mean, it was only for the two kids. Lenin didn't have it, but Tommy and Elliot did. And it was completely healed. And we have no idea what happened.

For both of them too. Both of them. The doctors have no clue what happened. Didn't you say, I don't know if this was on a podcast or on a TikTok video, but didn't you say that, like your father-in-law prayed over your kids? I can tell that part. Yeah, you talk about it.

So, yeah, they tell us the news that our kids have this and it could be severe or like I mentioned earlier, just an arm that doesn't function correctly or a leg. Million different possibilities, but as a parent your head goes to the worst one. You know, and so that's what we were thinking. So I was holding Tommy at the time and I started to like hyperventilate

where the doctors had to take Tommy from me because I was so terrified for my kids. You do not wanna get that news. And I called my dad and my family came to the hospital and he gave one of our, all of them, but he gave two of our kids a blessing, put his hands on their head to bless them that they would be be able to

Run play and you know experience things that other kids get to experience, right? And you know that they were they were tiny two-pound kids So he put you know, like two little fingers on their head and he gave him a blessing Which is basically just like a prayer to bless the child and in the prayer he mentioned like blessing that they would be able to run walk and experience normal things that other kids experience yeah and he did it for those two kids that that um we're told that they were diagnosed with that right and? And two weeks later, they do the exact same scan and it was gone.

And I asked them what happened? And they said, we do not know because on the scan before, like there's all these white dots and that means, you know, that's gonna cause this issue with your kids and those white dots are gone and we can't explain it. I was like, well, give me a reason. And they said, the only reason is that there was a straight miracle

because there's no other explanation why this scan doesn't and this one does because it's irreversible. You can't go back in time. It's, it's there for life. So yeah, that was the miracle that we experienced. And we believe in miracles because of that. Wow. It was amazing to this day.

That was one of the, cause Haley was in the hallway cause she didn't want to hear the news about how the updated scan was like, oh to hear the news about how the updated scan was. Like, oh, like we have, basically what the updated scan was, we now have more details of what this is, right? Because their brain was a little bit bigger, it just, they could get more details and the answer was like, it's gone.

I was like, what do you mean it's gone? You said it couldn't be gone. So I ran in the hallway, bawling my eyes out, could it see straight? Basically tackled her and she's like, what, what, what? I'm like, it's gone. And you didn't even believe me because it was irreversible. Yeah.

Yeah. Honestly, like, yeah, it's just amazing. Like I've just never experienced anything like it before. So it was just super special. That's just like parenthood. I feel like highs and lows and like just making it through. And like, it's just just it's so I'm so glad you guys have each other like through it all and you guys seem so

solid and so sweet and I already feel like we're friends Can I give you guys a hug? I want to give you both a hug. Oh my god. Okay well now I'm having a hug. I feel like we just bonded everybody. This is great. That's really funny. Sorry. We've actually never done, we never hugged at the end of a podcast. Well, yay, that's so special.

That's so good. Hailey and Mitch, thank you for coming on Unplanned. Where can people find you guys? Wait, I have one last question. Okay. Do you guys think you're gonna have baby number four? It could be baby four, five, six. Oh, that's right in here. Four, five, six? Do you guys think you're gonna have baby number four? It could be baby four five six.

I'm gonna say because there's a chance that there's a bigger chance of having multiple. Oh I've heard that. So I mean it is just like still up and down like we don't know you know. Okay. There's moments where. She's downplaying it. She will randomly come to me and be like I want another. I think I want another one. I'm like, are you sure? But then there's days where I'm like, heck no. I think that's how it's always like, once you start having more, you're like, okay, nevermind. I hear that all the time.

They're just like, we are gonna do it. And then we're like, nevermind, nevermind. I'm scared. You just have one bad day. It depends on the hour. Yeah. It depends on the hour, honestly. Okay, well it's not harsh, no?

You didn't get the snip. It's not snipped. So it's- That can no? You know, you didn't get the snip. So, yeah, not snipped. So, yeah, that could be reversed. So, y'all are young. Well, if you guys like this episode, go follow Hailey and Mitch right now. They both are on Instagram. They're both on TikTok. Thanks so much for having us, you guys. This is so fun. Thanks for coming and doing this. Thanks for leaving your children to come talk to us. This was fun. All right. Bye.