The Vault with Financielle - “Should I Use Child Benefits For My Debts?” | The Vault Episode 95

Episode Date: December 18, 2025

Send us a text“Debt-free status is way more important than a luxurious lifestyle” - we unpack this week’s controversial opinion, then dive into your dilemmas:💸 ”Do I sacrifice take-home pay for a bigger pension?”💸 ”Should I use child benefits for my debts?”Got a money win or (totally anonymous) dilemma? Share it via the Financielle app community or email [e-mail] 💌You’re not alone in figuring this stuff out. Get honest, helpful reads at financielle.com 💖💸Connect with our Partners*🫶 Get life insurance with our friends at Lifesearch. Speak to a female advisor here.🏡 Meet our Financielle approved Mortgage Brokers.💸 Get cashback that reduces your mortgage interest with Sprive (£5 extra for you using code: FINANC)*The above are tracked links, which tells our partners we sent you and may in future result in a payment or benefit to our site.The Vault is an entertaining yet thought provoking podcast that answers our community’s dilemmas and confessions surrounding women and money.Visit https://www.financielle.com to download our app.Watch the podcast on YouTube.Follow Financielle for more:▶︎ TikTok▶︎ InstagramAbout Financielle:Financielle is a female focussed finance app helping women to take back control of their money, ditch debt, increase savings and invest in their future.Recorded and Produced by Liverpool Podcast Studios▶︎ Web ▶︎ Instagram▶︎ LinkedIn

Welcome to The Vault with Finance Chat. This is a safe space where we talk all things, life and money and no topics are off limits. Hello, everybody. Hello. I need to distract from the fact that I've got three mints in my mouth right now. Oh, we're going to take over. So for good if you could just talk between yourselves. We're actually just talking about dentists.

Are you keeping your teeth fresh for your next dentist visit? People probably need like a dental update from you, Lucy, because we've talked about it quite a lot and the money that has been spent and you are grateful for your dental sinking fund aren't you? Yeah so I'm actually in the process of building up my next dental sinking fund um basically long story short something went wrong I had to get it fixed the dentist didn't fix it properly I had to go to a new dentist she told me that what the old dentist did was all wrong and I actually made like a formal complaint and got a full refund which was really scary it was really scary but i did it why was it scary just like complainant and then i also

felt really guilty because i emailed the dental practice and they responded and said our dentists are all self-employed so like you can talk through us basically but like it's not us right it was it like a company it was like you were going to an individual so did you feel more awkward because of that and i was like oh my god imagine if i see a walking around and then i've been like oh my god give me back she won't she'll be driving a really nice car Yeah, that's true. That's true. Yeah, with the amount you paid. Yeah. And so I went to my new dentist, which is more expensive than my old dentist, but I trust her. And I've basically got a load of temporary things in for the last like six months seeing how they go and then getting them redone basically. Right. permanently. But that is going to cost a lot of money. So I've been building that up since you told me that. Okay. In preparation. Yes. Aside from my normal dentist. So lessons for people, like, that don't have a dental sinking fund, like, what would your advice be from your experience?

Just start one, even if your teeth are perfect. Like, it took, it just took one crunchy piece of toast. Is that what it was? It was not toast. And now that tooth is not there anymore. Right? You literally had to have the tooth removed. Yeah, it got root. It got really deep filling. for that was first appointment second appointment it was like root canal second root canal and it was like oh we're going to put a crown on it luckily i didn't get the crown because i was like that's not feeling right yeah got it removed in the end yeah and that process was about nine months yeah from start to finish from a first bite oh it was a long slog wasn't it it's important like i said it's some people choose to have dental insurance and do it that way

other people choose to make sure you go regulate to the dentist and have checkups and pay as you go and it's just being aware that at any point at one of those checkups or when you have like debilitating pain like tooth pain is just not the one yeah you don't want to be like oh I can't afford to go to the dentist because a lot of people do that yeah they put it off I'm so grateful that I've got this fun now because literally the other day I was like that tooth's not feeling right I'm just going to call and be like can I have an appointment it's not super urgent but like I need an appointment soon she's booked me in and I'm like imagine having to worry about how I'm going to afford that

Like it is such a self-inflicted privilege. And for things like dentists work, a dental work, I do think you can start with an emergency fund. So if you're on the lean basis, then that's exactly what your emergency funds for. So when we are talking about how important is to have your emergency fund, it's for lots of different reasons. And so we talk about a washing machine breaking or we talk about having a leak or we're talking about budgeting wrong and suddenly being short on money.

and another one is your health. It might be that you need to go and see a physio. It might be that you need to go see a chiropractor. It might be that you need to pay an excess on the health insurance policy so you can get seen before you kind of GP. So you can prioritise that later. And you say this before you don't like using your emergency fund. And so that's why you're a fan of a dental fund.

We have a dental fund as well. I have to admit it's mainly to pay for regular appointments. It's actually not enough in it. I think I'm probably okay that I would use my emergency fund for it. it but that's having a starter one and then building it up especially I think you've had a really good pragmatic chat with your dentist and you knew it was going to cost something so it's it's going to cost something I'm not going to avoid that I'm not going to ignore it so I'm going to save up for it and so it's in a pot and then when it comes to pay you move the money you pay

and you don't feel like your savings are depleted and you're in a good place so I feel like thank you for the update you're welcome I've got like I used to have really random sinking funds and I've had to engulf them all into just one singular health fund at one point I had like traditional Chinese medicine fund go on

professional confessional time like just supplements I used to spend so much money on supplements supplements but like do we still spend a lot money on supplements? Yeah it's just in health do you still spend not money not as much

because I don't think you should take them all the time I don't think I do worry about supplements and being sold to women. I saw a really good article today. I think I shared it in the group around the menopausal products that have kind of come out to help combat. They're just basically like marketing to women that are going through the menopause with supplements that could potentially help. They're not like proven to take away hot sweats, takeaway brain fog, take away. All these things could help with them.

But a lot of them you could buy it as a basic supplement from the supermarket. Or you could package. diet and like, sorry, Mr. Vinyas, the worst for it. I know she's like, she's, she's, she's led it and she's got a whole, I know that we've got people that are fans and there are lots of other brands as well riding on it. And I, obviously on morning live, I have lots of doctors that are on there and you can ask all the questions and they constantly cover this because especially women are being targeted on ads, social media. The way it's marketed.

To like, we'll just make it a pretty packaging and oh, I felt amazing. And quite frankly, If people get a placebo effect from some of these things, I'm here for it. But what, like, the collagen is the worst. The collagen is the worst because to take collagen, and this is not medical advice, but just go, like, look at the doctors of the morning live and some of the stuff that the BBC sign off being talked about. Is the fact that, like, if it's in powder form, it just doesn't, a body doesn't absorb it. Whereas if it's in meats and if it's in the right, um, the right dietary form. Yeah.

There's so much collagen in that. But there's, it's like the melatonin thing. Like there's a big thing. about melatonin and I was literally on with Zand and he talked

about the someone was saying I'm like a melatonin mule because whenever I got to the States and I was like

can you get me them? I got some remember when we went to Helsinki oh yeah and you got literally

stocking up and so again I'm not going to remember exactly what he said about it but what he said was it can get

you an extra extra four minutes sleep a night and so he's like take it if you want to but there's a whole raft of

other things that will absolutely to help your sleep until you're doing all those an hour before you go to bed are you have caffeine from caffeine

the diet taking a nap it was proven that taking like a 20 minute nap in the middle of the day if you can train yourself to do that is better than some of the other things

and what they say on my Instagram before Divinia talking about melatonin about how she's right to the point what she's saying is we're not allowed to sell melatonin but we can sell like gin in a can and I was like I get it but yeah you just

everyone's supplementing everything instead of actually going to the core of their diet and going, like I'm low on iron. So instead of getting an iron supplement, I went and got pumpkin seeds, like eating more red meat. Like, I actually looked at... Start there first.

Even cereals, it's like fortified iron. Everything I looked at was, like, some cereals, they get a bad rep, but actually they do put extra iron in than that you can absorb properly rather than taking a supplement. You've got to go back to basics. And it doesn't cost you anything to get pumpkin seeds. I think they're 10 to 9p and I have them on my porridge every day. You're not surprised at people that, like,

if you are someone that's into supplements and I like do take X, I take creatine and I take and I get it from my diet but I could definitely do better and I'm doing the easy option and I take protein powder mainly to make porridge taste nice. Taste nicer yeah but but there's a danger that I over rely on that and don't have natural sources of it so like we're all guilty of it. Sorry for triggering everyone but I just think it's important to note that women especially I've been marketed to on the collagen front on the agent people. people don't want to wage like and so that's normal but like again i always compare it to Neil Neil's not being sold up the river with like all these taking collagen supplements well it's

not taking it in powder form no but you're what I mean it's not being marketed to to go and buy them like collagen coffee yeah I cut out all of my supplements and I just have one supplement it's beef liver Jesus Christ I'm not eating expanded it's basically it's just like all good meats, obviously. But I'm not eating liver. I don't think I'd want to eat a beef liver. So if I had to have one, if that was good for me, maybe. But it's, what form is it in? A capsule. Oh, right. Okay. But it's obviously got all of your... It's a shot. Like, anemic friends. Yeah.

That would, yeah, maybe hard to get from food. Yeah. Like so much of it. I don't want the food. I don't want it. You don't want to eat liver. Okay. I get that. I get that. But coming back to the budget point, if you're going to take them put it in the budget. Yeah. Because it's like, that is a thing it's a big portion of budget is it from your grocery budget and if it's not

but also do your research if you're getting them off TikTok shop well because you know your favourite influence is like pushing Oh my God it'll be a load of rubbish

just do your research okay controversial opinion time debt free status is way more important than the luxurious lifestyle and I'm coming at this from an angle of imagine you've been

spending heavily on credit you're living like quite luxurious just like flashy lifestyle maybe and you've got to a point like our community win in last week's episode and she was like my credit card literally declined and my limit got reduced yeah on the day and it's like right you're forced to change your lifestyle now like how are we even approaching that do you know what like I always think of when I think for someone finally giving up like the credit card life do you know on films when it's like you're in a rich bunch of friends and then all of a sudden

like one, it's not even filming in real life, like the family that have been flashing the cash and like getting the cars and getting the amazing house and they literally have to overnight like sell the house, sell the Shakespeare, but you don't like it. I know, I need to... You just try for it. I will try. I'll try. Oh, Christmas I think I'll hear Mark for Ships Creek. It's giving

niche reference. Akator. Why? Faye and Nestle's dad. Oh yeah. Where he was living the rich life of like, because you like selling gold or something. remember. Let's use the example of fairies. If you read an avatar, yeah, no, it's a good example.

We're like living the life of luxury and then literally go into poverty, basically. I had a friend at uni who I'm not in contact with anyone. She did come off social media and so like a lovely, lovely girl and had parents who like were very, very loving, but dad was a dodgy dealer. like in just business a wide boy is that they had this beautiful property in Wilmslow

and she went to private school and the she had money like she would have cash at uni and the mum would come, mum didn't work and would come up with a nanny and they'd go to like you know nice places for meals and things and then last year she was in this like unbelievable

apartment, like, that was bought, you know, was not rented. There were Ferraris in her name. She never drove it. It was not given to her, but she, you know, had, like, the top of the range mini that was hers. And I believe her dad got arrested at some point, and bailiffs were knocking on her door. And, um, dad went to prison. And I don't know the details, but what know is she never really wanted that life. She wanted a mom and dad. Yeah. And, and, and, you know, And she wanted to be normal. And yes, there's some glitz and glam unless there's some, like, nice it is. But she just, that wasn't important to her.

Her dad got arrested and went to prison. And so, you know, that's the extreme example that, like, literally, like, there was bailiffs and she had to move out of the apartment and she went home and, you know, like a drastic change. And she clicked on social, like, was it what people thought about her? Like, she literally had an identity change. Was it for criminal reasons? Like, did she have to come off social?

I will never know because he was involved in some stuff. And it just, it was the rags, no, not rags to riches. It was like the riches to rags. It was the, it all catches up with you. And that is where you are like all these assets and all these things and what it looks like. But actually, is it really worth it? No. Is it really worth it?

I'm not saying that like Ferrari's a bad and nice apartments are bad. And especially if like you build up your wealth, there's nothing wrong with wealth. But if it's funded through finance or it's funded through, you know, means that aren't right. Is it worth it? Because actually what do we really want, then? They're like, we want our family. I want a nice life. Yeah.

We want to be liked. We want it to normality. We don't really worry that someone's going to bang on the door and ask for money. Yeah. I think going through the financial play, but I'm so not bothered about material things as I used to me. And I think it's just because there's so much psychology around it. It's really helpful to read through and be like, why do we feel this way? Like, like looking at yourself, really looking at yourself in the mirror and going,

and why do you overspend on these things? And 90% of it isn't because you actually want them. It's like a status symbol or it's like a physical dopamine hit that you get, like that little light burst of joy when you buy something out of your racist basket, whatever it might be. It's all psychological. And when you take those things away and understand it a little bit more, it just makes you realize being in debt and making debt payments

and using Binappelator and credit card and all these things. Like to be without it, I have so much freedom. Like I'm sitting here going, I just feel. Good. Well, we talked about just then, though, didn't we? And like, when you, I find making big marketing, the bad guy really helps because it helps you get angry because you go, are you kidding me? Like, you know, influences pushing things and.

I'm exhausted. Oh, but everything is another product. It's another thing. And the end-to-end skincare potential and all the different fits and the halls and the, I said if I see another H&M hole, I'm going to poke my own eye out. just what fed up and a Florence and Fred what's that

exactly Tesco close yeah now Lucy and I did buy a good pair of jeans these are them hashtag ad no and definitely

I've had to shrink mine a bit more one pair of jeans we don't do like halls no but everything is spend spend

spend spend and it's about how you look and about how you want to be seen and you're truly wealthy people don't flaunt it truly wealthy people you probably don't realize that truly wealthy like they go and buy the stuff that's not got like gucci all over it like they're going by like the best leather handbag because they're like this will last me years not because everyone will know it's a do you know what I mean yeah I was like oh like Carl's from

with them and they're just obsessed with branded yeah yeah and they're you usually real they're not like fakes but it's like Valencia on the kids on the Gucci sliders and I'm like like it's just like can you tell I've got money and it's like and it's a particular taste thing as well it happens a lot in Liverpool's well we're in Liverpool right now yeah I love that I love the brands there's nothing wrong with it

but a lot of it is connected to what it looks like and even if the individuals wearing it aren't consciously thinking like that because not everyone is it's a societal thing it's a perception thing it's a bling, bling, bling, bling, and it's really hard to break free, but when you do, when you put all this together, which is spending more than I've got, I've got all this shit, like I've literally got stuff, but I don't really have many assets. If I've done my net worth calculation, I wouldn't have anything, I've got nothing to show

for it. And I was chatting to be a wonderful woman, and she may well be listening to this. I did a podcast with her last week. And at the end of it, we talked about having to impress people and spending more than you make, and it happened over years, and not have. having money to leave a relationship and lots of different things about Fan and Shell. And she broke down in tears at the end of the podcast. And she was just wonderful.

And I was like, I think a lot of it was this realization that it wasn't actually all her fault, that the system is set up to trip us all up. And a lot of money is spent trying to get us to part with our money. And what we don't want is to be, you know, at 40, 50, 60 and have had just stuff, but have spent all our lives, like just spending. Tracing the next day. Yeah, because it just doesn't matter. I said on the car on the way in, like, I'm off social media till after Christmas because

I'm beginning to feel like not a good mum because I keep seeing all the posts of like, and I'm going to buy this and this is a Christmas Eve box and this is, this is this. And I was like, what can I do to make myself not feel like this anymore? And I just was like, I'm just going to come off social media because I feel so very triggered. And I think that's like growth by recognising what my triggers are. And it's obviously following certain types of people. like even on following all the people that I follow at the moment, it would still come on my 4-U page, TikTok shops flying up

and this, I've bought this Christmas experience. Like, I agreed last year, like, we booked too much for the kids. It's overwhelming. Like, as kids, it was like, the... The potter thing, the barbells. Oh, yeah, so every year we go... It's a big decision for you. Yeah, we go to a pottery-making thing,

and the kids have made a barbill every year since they were kids. And we've got to the point now where they're really shit. They're really shit. It was cute when it was a handprint. They're like brown. Italian brain. Would you want? This year, 100%

if we went there this year wouldn't be, oh, we're making, and we've got gorgeous ones and I love them and I get them out every Christmas. They're really sentimental. And I keep thinking if the tree fell over,

I would actually be devastated. And there's no amount of insurance that I could get. Yeah. And that's why you work out what's actually important to because I remember making them, like the handprint ones,

I remember taking them, I've got pictures of them, doing it when the kids. And now we got to the point where last year it was Pokemon. and it was a Real Madrid away kit. I don't want it. Not quite the theme, guys.

This is not. Do you ever when it mixed, when I made it really brown and you were like... It's brown, it's shit. Because it was green and red mixed and it makes brown. Woody loved it. It was like, this is not going on much. It's not aesthetic.

And the last year was a mint green Pokemon face of which I don't want... It will go around the back of the tree. And Neil ends up sending the kids away to go and do... Go and get something else my eye. And Neil's doing it. And I've sat there going, what the fuck I'm doing?

This isn't sentimental. Can I just say it's about 60 quid for two bobbles. And then we get drinks and then we get food. And then you're going to go pick them up. And then it's really far away. And then the week before Christmas, they're ringing and they're like, where are you?

And I'm in Tenerie. Taking the ball and going to go in. I'm going to have to go on Christmas Eve and drive an hour. For the real journey waking, Bob. Oh my God. So let this be a lesson to you. So Holly's come. Yeah, fulls there.

So I'm off social media. So I don't have shit. But what this shows is, like, we are human as well. The system is stacked up to make us fail, to make us spend, to take our money. And sometimes that's okay, but create a budget for it and make it something that you choose. And Holly's realises, and I'm like, I'm like, I'm going, yeah, I should do the same. But it's triggering. So take control back.

Think of the two to three things that, like, do you know what Holly is doing this year? She's going wreath making. Expensive. She likes to do it. She's good at it. nice. She has a nice time doing it with our friends and then it goes on the door and that's a memory. Last night we were driving to one of my kids swimming lessons and I was like, oh, I was like, I'm really excited. genuinely, I'm so excited to do the wreath making because Laura gets to do it every year because

her old boozy law friend that she used to work for, invite her, pay for her. They feed me, they give you drinks and then the man does it for you. So she always says yes and that's not a Laura thing to do. She don't want to do crap. But I actually also, I have a reef that has lights in it that I keep and I give my wreaths to my auntie. Yeah, so it's a gift. It suits her home more. Well, I'm, it's 60 pounds to go and do this readmaking. And like years ago, I would have gone, I could never.

But because I've got my Christmas sinking fund and it's hefty, it's good. And I always over, I make it bigger because I think in previous years I've had to steal from other pots and it stresses me out because I've under budgeted. So now we over budget and anything that we have left over, we can put either towards next year's sinking fund, so it's less a month so we can put maybe overpay the mortgage or whatever it might be. I was like, I'm so excited because we do it in a Christmas. TP. It's so festive. We have a nice

glass of while and we have a chat with friends. It's a lovely bonding experience and I love seeing it on my door and it gives me joy every time I see it. And I'm not that person. Like when people... She's not but you've switched out the 60 quid on the shit baubles now and accepted it's your time. I'm thinking of paying 60 quid and just sitting watching them and not making

and just drinking and eating. But I thought you could do it. I could be very festive. But it's that you're not, you're choosing the activities rather than them choosing you. Yeah. I'm not getting in full. I'm like, what do I actually want to do? And what will my family enjoy? Because I think I would book some stuff.

And Teddy, especially would be like, I don't want to do that. There was something and you were like. But then... Mum and dad have booked the kids at the Christmas train. I was like, do not include Teddy. He will whinge about it for a week and he doesn't want to go. Ted little ones. Perfect.

Yeah. Well, I think it was more so as well, the time aspect of that I spend overthinking, over-analyzing, over-researching, and then I end up not doing it anyway. That was why I came off social media because I was going, oh should I get those Christmas decorations from I don't know the range then you go on the range website then research it put it in your basket then not buy it we know she doesn't we know she's not she's a basket lever she's like a marketing nightmare the worst

should you lend money to family and friends what is an effort fund how do I build my emergency fund well we're so glad you asked head over to financial dot com where we tackle the money topics you actually care about okay time for our first dilemma do I sacrifice take home pay for a bigger pension. Hi girls, love the pod and would love some advice. I'm currently interviewing for a part-time second job alongside my full-time job. Things seem very positive and I think I may secure it. My question is regarding workplace pensions. Can I still qualify for a second workplace pension with contributions from both myself and the employer? And is it even worth it? At my full-time

job, I paid 12.9% into my pension, so it's already a decent size. I'm going to be taxed 40% on the second job and it just feels like if I then pay into a pension on top, I won't actually see any of that money from that second job. To begin with, the extra money would help pay off my debt, which is on 0% winking emoji. After that, I'll use it to build a bigger emergency fund, maybe overpay our mortgage and then probably save. Help a girl out, please. This is such a good question and there's a couple of elements to pick up on it. So I am a fan of if you are in a second role where you could potentially get a contribution that you get it. I know, I know she's overdoing it in the main one. Love that. And it sounds like she may get a really good contribution.

In the UK, especially, we have something called auto-enrollment, which is when you meet certain criteria, you will be auto-enrolled into a pension. And it's a super good thing. And actually, pension contributions went up massively because we're all lazy. It's hard to opt out and you faffing and you, you know, you just, it accidentally builds up. And I love that because really we want to get people into a saving for retirement mentality. And what, you know, there's a couple of criteria so people would have to look at it. But for example, there's one where, like, you have to earn over 10 grand across the year in an employment to be auto enrolled.

But that doesn't mean that you can't approach that employer and ask to be put in. So, for example, my husband has a part-time job. And I'm not sure whether he wouldn't, by default, earn 10. He wouldn't because it's literally a part-time job. It's like, it's like a hobby and it gets paid for it. It's really lovely. and he goes out the house and I can watch like keeping up the Kardashians and stuff

and to be fair, hang on, I feel like I need to defend myself I do end up doing a lot of stuff in the house and I do, I do all the kids stuff like I'm taking them to the 12 different things while he's just like, going watching some football, but he does work part time and he is a worker status it's kind of like an employment status where he is on payroll

and he didn't automatically get put in and we put him in and so he's building a nice little pension from this hobby that's in the background and I've done the same with other things as well So even though it's a small amount, I love it because you get the match. And so it's not huge, but it's, again, practicing that every time I earn, I get a contribution from me, get contribution from the employer.

And it's just, you have to proactively ask that question. The second thing that she picked up on, and it's something to go away and do some calculations with on some salary calculators is if you are going to tax the second job at 40%, it's also even more reason to invest in a pension because you get the tax, back. So you get 20% of it put in the pension and then 40% of it comes back through payroll. So what you have to do is estimate two ways. One, you roughly estimate what you're going to make earn from that second job. Estimate what you're going to put in as a pension and speak to

my HMRSA on the phone. They're really, really good as well and see if they can adjust your tax code accordingly because you will feel the benefit, not the detriment of that 40% or you wait to the end of the year. I wouldn't advise this, but sometimes it's a bit cleaner if you don't know exactly what you're going to earn. And at the end of the year, you do, you don't have to do a tax return necessarily, but you ring HMRC and you say, hi, HMRC during this year, for that nine grand that I earned at that part-time job, I actually contributed 5% into my pension. So can you give me the 40% back on? It's the 20. So of the 40% earnings, 20% goes automatically into your pension. But you have to claim that extra 20% and that's a warning for anyone

If you are a higher rate taxpayer, you will get an extra 20% back on the element that you're paying 40. You'll see in your pension that 20% is being put in by the pension provider, but anything that's in the 40 bracket, you have to get back yourself from HMRC. You can go. It's annoying. It's annoying. It really is. They should just give it you back.

I think it's cheeky. Because they can find out this information is something that is unknown, but you can go back some years as well. So if you have been a 40% tax, 40%? taxpayer and you have been contributing to a pension, make sure that you're not leaving anything on the table, HMRC might give you a refund. So it's important to have all your P60s and to have a confirmation of all pension contributions, even ones that you've made like to a personal pension, so it could be a sip, it could be a self-invested personal pension. It's worth getting

a brew, getting the paperwork out, just having a little look, getting all the documentation if you're not sure, ring HMRC, because I've been that person that gets that check back when I realise, because no one tells you. There's nothing better than you get a brown envelope and you're like, And they're like, we owe your money. Neil got on the other day. He was like, what there? It was like, 170 quiddy was like, getting my bank account right in my belly.

Everyone, we're going out to dinner. Dinner's all me. Yeah, I think I have a look at that. I think that you've got a plan. You've taken on the extra job to pay off debt. I love that and build up your agency savings. I don't think this will change your life. So you could do invest in the pension.

You could not speak to the employer, see if they'll match it. but look at the tax and make sure that you're not leaving money on the table with H-Massie. That's so interesting. That was a proper lesson. I was literally so engaged with Laura. I was talking about as well. I'm sorry if you need to listen that on 0.5 speed instead of like times too. Carlin.

Okay, community win time. I'm so grateful to you. I've paid off my next and cloner accounts and closed them for good. I'm now on my way to paying off my overdraft and building savings. I have a credit card. that defaulted in 2021 due to lockdown, but it's due to come off next year. We can finally start looking at getting a mortgage.

Thank you for your podcasts. They are such great help. FYI, I've also written a will. Oh, yeah. That's such a good doing. Oh, it's something like I said, I know we had a big push on it in October, but for those people listening,

we worked with Octopus Legacy. They are still a really good cost-effective solution. I think I'll go back to, if you go, look at our fanishell.com for slash protection. it's our like wills and protection section and we've got loads of details on why you need a will if you go through octopus

they are really cost effective if you have a bit of a complicated situation and you want to speak to them you can call them and if it's something that you want to speak to a solicitor about go directly as well to a solicitor but you know there are

we hear the horror stories and we hear the positives and we hear that from you guys you email and you say thank God my parents had one thank God my sister had one yeah thank you know it's heard it all like yeah we have and it's not pleasant but when someone's got it it just it's about having your shit together and it's one of the things that I hope you never have to use or when you do it's just so who cares when you if it's like 50 years in the

future so just do it because it brings peace of mind and it's extra adulting and it's something that we all should have so well done but amazing and congratulations on you know being getting close to that default coming off having really really good finances and go and get in that house and that mortgage that next thing can get in the bin And then Laura nearly didn't get a mortgage because she had a swimsuit on the next Credit card No well accidental store card

Accidental I thought Yeah I didn't know When I shared that story about the swimsuit I can't remember which episode so yeah I bought a swimsuit when I Just was going a holiday straight after every neighbor And I was like bikinis aren't happening And I didn't have one and I bought one

And I accidentally followed on the clicking journey Store card didn't realize it was only 19 pound I still remember the cost of the swimsuit And they were sending me email reminders And I was like, no, I'm not having a credit card You can go away, but they're actually asking me to pay Oh my God And it was a default on my account

And I paid it, but it was on there And it nearly stopped me getting a mortgage And it didn't, actually didn't It just shows you. And actually when I shared that loads of people like next are the worst for it They are. They still do it, apparently It's like a really hidden, doesn't seem like a store card situation When I buy stuff for the kids

I'm like, I'm so conscious Because of the story I'm like, absolutely needs to be credit card. I'm like to put my debit card in. Take my money. Yeah. If you'd like to tell us you, you'll win, head to the community in the app

or email it to the vault at financial alt.com. Struggling to make it to payday, the financial app helped me track my money, pay off debt and finally feel in control. I've built savings. I've started investing. And I actually feel financially well. Download the financial app

and start your money comeback today. Okay, time for a second dilemma. Get cozy. long dilemma. Should I use my child benefits for my debts? High financial love release. That's been my favourite name so far. I love the podcast and I've binged listened since finding you a few weeks ago. I'm already feeling more in control about my money, which is such a great feeling, but I'm stuck and I would really appreciate your advice. Due to basically mismanaging my money for over a few years and maternity leave, I'm in debt at just under 10K. And by the way,

This is Euros, so we're international. The setting of this is actually a European city. I don't know which one, but. I currently work part-time in a job that pays peanuts, but it's perfect for childcare for my toddler and days when I'm operating on zero sleep. I live abroad in a small city, so earning potential without studying the language or retraining is tough. I'm at the upper end of the pay scale for my job,

but I only bring home around €1,200 per month. I've created my budget in the app, and I'm at around £60 a month loss. I mean, euros when I say pounds. That's fine. I've just found a casual cafe job so I can pick up some extra money and selling things on Vinted, etc.

But I haven't calculated child support into the budget. It feels wrong to use it on paying my debts, but after paying for nurseries, napes, etc., it could be around 200 to 300 euros per month. To add to the complication, I've split up from my baby's dad, but we still live together until I can save money to move out. Having to pay the debt first means moving out could take years.

Our finances are separate aside from groceries and I know that he wouldn't approve of me using the child support money for my debts from conversations that we've had before. He earns more than I do, but we split everything 50-50. There's literally no more room to strip back on my budget, no fund money, no health and beauty stuff, no clothes, etc. which means I can't even really start building my emergency fund let alone pay off my debts build sinking funds and move out since I live abroad there's no family to move in with I also can't legally move back to the UK with my kid without my dad's approval even though my earning potential would be much higher there I'd love some advice I really want to work through my debt so I can save to move out which would actually actually put me in a better financial position thanks to housing benefit etc but I feel stuck and don't want to lose momentum before I've even started.

Should I be including the universal and regional child support money that I get or continue keeping it separate for Nappi's nursery fees? Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Oh, so it's a couple of cases. Oh, I mean, imagine she's got such a like melting pot of issues where like she's she's got something she can't do and that's one of the things that we can't, we've not got a magic one. I wish we did have a magic one for some scenarios

and we really don't have that. And I also massively empathize that they're living under the same roof and the fact that it sounds like they're going to have to live for years. But they're separated. You know, that, and again, there's no magic one because she is in a different country. She can't legally leave. You know, she could have conversations about that at some point,

but it sounds like she can't immediately do that. But what we do on a black and white basis, no matter what the scenario is all income goes in at the same. top. And so I think the most important thing for her to realize is there's two things. One, the debts are not none of his business anymore. It's your personal debts and how you choose to manage your money is nothing to do with him. The child support contribution that you get should go at the top of your budget and it just gets collectively put together. And hopefully when that's all put at the top, there is an excess left over and you can start to build your

emergency fund first, which is one month's expenses. And once you've got that sorted, you then move down the playbook and you start to work through your debts. It is irrelevant what that money's not that money's for housing and it's also for financial well-being and if you have run up debts for whatever reason, it doesn't matter. You're now taking control and as he as she says, once the debts have gone, there's going to be space to save. There's going to be space to invest for your child and future in child's future. So I would definitely recommend starting there and going to just do the budget with everything at the top. The second thing I would recommend, I'd especially Actually, if you are on good terms with your ex-partner, it sounds like you're intending to stay in the country, you know, is splitting bills a little bit more fairly.

So if he earns more and if the plan at the moment is to stay living in the same place, then see if he can help. And I do think for a period of time, like, you know, I don't think it's going to go down well if like you suddenly start getting your nails done. But then he's given more money. It's incredibly difficult. I'm not saying you shouldn't. I just appreciate how niche this is. but I think to keep it as simple as simple as possible work through the playbook

and start on the basics and build up the mini emergency fund and then look to pay off the debt the big hard thing for me is just don't think the living situation is ideal but it feels like you've not got much of a choice and if we were in the UK and someone was asked I think someone has actually asked this question before

my child benefit should I keep it separate it should go into like adjuster to my kids and we're like no no no every bit of income whether it's vinted sales, whether it's child support, goes into the top of the budget. And then you don't have the guilt then of paying what then and the other. You just work through the budget and do it that way. But I love when people like, oh, just make money off vinted.

I'm like, oh, when you've got a child, I would want something more stable, like a stable of an income. And that $1,200 doesn't feel like it, the best way that you can generate more excess in your budget is by increasing your income at the top. And that would be the key for me. It is. I agree.

And, you know, when you say, like, you know, she's got child responsibilities. How much is the ex helping as well? I was right to say. Because it could be a scenario where for a period of time, you know, and you can share with him like I'm trying to get on my feet. I want to build some savings. Like obviously at some point, you know, I'd like to rent somewhere and you rent

somewhere. We're both going to move on. It's in his interest that you are financially stable as well. For your child. And so, yeah, could there be different jobs that you can get like in a cafe, in a bar on a weekend that he takes on like a Saturday childcare day or a Sunday childcare day? and you are making money

but the money's going to you and him and say, you know, and your little one's future. So I think with this one and maybe I've mentally got a bit of unfinished business I think I probably want to go away and look at this dilemma again, I know it's a bit we've not done that before but I might want to revisit it

and we might speak to her. So I feel like I might maybe if she's happy to share that we might share either the contents of the call or the follow up afterwards but I don't have just dismiss this one and be like, oh yeah, no, it's tough, good luck. I feel for her. And I think that maybe we can dig under it and understand some further options and some further details, then our listeners can

benefit from that as well. So maybe this is a to be continued if you don't mind. I know we don't need to do that. No, I think that'll be helpful. Cool. Seems like there's a lot going on. Yeah. I feel like she needs a plan. She does. And a cuddle. Yeah. Virtual. European. Yeah. Lots of kisses, wouldn't it? Like, how many do you do? okay that is all for this episode the vault is now closed and just a quick disclaimer the vault is just a chat around life for money topics we're not giving financial advice