The Viall Files - E113 Peter Weber Speaks Out

Episode Date: April 7, 2020

Pilot Pete talks to Nick to break his silence about it all. He tells us what actually happened between him and Madi, what he thinks of Barb’s reaction during ATFR, and what’s going on with Kelley. Plus, he shares the story of what went down when he first met Kelley. Buckle your seatbelts, guys! Be sure to subscribe so you never miss an episode. THANKS TO OUR SPONSORS: HELIX SLEEP: http://helixsleep.com/viall BETTERHELP: http://betterhelp.com/viall ARTICLE: http://article.com/viall See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

what's going on everybody welcome to a very special episode of the vile files even coming at you on a tuesday i'm your host nick joined by my producer ro Rochelle. Hello. And we have the one and only Peter Weber. We really appreciate Peter taking the time. You know, Peter reached out and said that he kind of was ready to talk. And obviously, we wanted to be respectful of him and his time on the show. And so once we got the okay, we were able to set this up. And it was kind of impromptu and last minute, but we know we mentioned

that we were going to have Jason on and that episode with Jason is great, but we wanted to get you Peter's episode and we dropped it on a Tuesday just to kind of line it up with what everyone else is doing out there. So I appreciate you guys adjusting to the non-traditional schedule,

but what a great episode with Peter. Shit, man, we talk about everything from beginning to end. Yeah, I'm surprised. He's really romantic. It really came across. At the end of the day, he is. He is. And you hear me talk about in this episode, it's a lot of Peter just kind of really just talking about everything from the breakup with Hannah Ann to AFR with Madison, Barb, what's going on with him and Kelly, et cetera, et cetera. But and you know what? Peter is very open and honest about the criticism he deserves to get. And he's I love that about Peter that he, he can own that. He's not a perfect person and, but he is, he's just honest. And I'd rather have someone who's real and honest and, and can admit when things, when he fucked up or when he messed up, I'll take

that. I know, I know who Peter is, i guess is my point you know he's a genuinely nice guy like i was a little bit confused at everything that's been going on but after the conversation i'm like no he's just a nice guy yeah i mean you know what and he he clearly kind of owns up to the fact that maybe he's not always the best decision maker in the moment right yeah you we can all say that with the benefit of of, but he is honest. That much I know. And I do appreciate him being as honest as he was in this episode. So we'll stop rambling. We'll get right to it. Without further ado, I hope you enjoyed this episode of Peter. As always, don't forget to check out our Ask Nick episodes on Monday. People love them. They're a big hit. I know there's a lot

of people tuning in just to hear Peter. We appreciate you taking the time and giving us a listen and feel free to check out some of our other episodes. Anything else, Rochelle, before we get to Peter? No. Alright, let's do it. How you doing, buddy? I'm good. Yeah.

I'm good. Hanging in there. It's good talking to you. I know that you've basically taken a break from really kind of being out there, at least doing interviews. And I know things were kind of hectic for you and dramatic. And it sounds like you kind of wanted to just, you know, get things out there. You know, a lot of people with the way things being that they are and people are stuck at home and everyone's on their phones and everyone's kind of like limited to things that everyone has their opinion. So it's good to have you kind of out there and talking. And it sounds like, you know, maybe you're just kind of ready to, you know, just to share your point of view. And so people can kind of stop speculating on everything that's going on in your world and you can kind of just talk freely.

So we appreciate you taking the time. Yeah, no, absolutely. Thanks. Obviously, kind of after AFR and everything, didn't really get a chance to kind of do a whole press thing and, you know, speak on everything. So excited I could come on and, you you know kind of just clear some things up and yeah just uh just be open about everything yeah and i i gotta say i i do you know you everyone knows i've i've uh had your back and you and i've become friends over this process and um and that's not to say that you haven't been without criticism and you know i've um you know i've pointed that

out but you know one thing i've always said about you is, you know, you've never complained and you've never shied away from owning, you know, whatever mistakes you had. And I've always appreciated about you. And you've always been, you know, very authentic. You know, you say what you want, whether you agree with your decisions or not, like people always are very critical of people, of people not being authentic and not kind of exposing yourself. And you've always, you've always done that. So I just want to say like, I've appreciated it about you. And I think some people that's lost on us sometimes, and it's always very easy to criticize our choices and things like that, but it's, it's hard to just put yourself out there. And so, so thanks for doing that. Yeah, no, man. I, uh, obviously I'm the first one to, you know, like a broken record. I'm the farthest thing from perfect. I made a ton of mistakes and, um, but as long as I can kind of learn from those and look forward and, uh, just be a better person

at the end of this all, which I do feel like I am now, um, you know, it's worth it. And, uh, man, that's all I can do. Awesome. Well, well, how am now, you know, it's worth it. And that's all I can do. Awesome. Well, how about we, you know, if you're okay with it, like, let's quote unquote, start at the beginning in terms of like, if we're just kind of trying to, you know, not that there's any misinformation out there. But if we're starting at the beginning and hearing just from your point of view, because the truth is, as we always heard, it's a cliche, there's two sides to every story. There's different points of view. It doesn't mean that another side isn't accurate, but we always see things through our own lenses of how things may be based on our feelings. So I know starting with AFR, obviously that was a crazy experience, right? A lot of things were said, you broke up with Hannah and

you, you know, you and Madison kind of came out there. I guess I'll just kind of give you the floor in terms of like, what were your thoughts on that? And what, what is information out there that you feel like, you know, people haven't heard your point of view? Yeah. Yeah. AFR, obviously that was, that was quite the, quite the ordeal. I don't think anyone kind of expected it to go that route, but that was really tough for me. You know, I remember just kind of leading up to that day, just having just a lot of, honestly, just anxiety, stressing out about it, not really knowing how it was going to go but I remember standing back there you know backstage right before I was about to go on and um you know I was with my producers and I just was like I was I was almost about to like pass out to be completely honest like I was just knowing that I was about to see Hannah Ann again for the first time um you know not really knowing what was going to happen with Madison on a live stage like that's tough And that unknown in front of millions of people was,

it was, it was, it was really tough. Um, you know, I got there on stage, I had to watch some of that stuff live that I hadn't seen yet. Um, you know, watching that breakup, uh, with Hannah and was brutal for me. And, um, yeah, there's just no other way to say it. Like I, I honestly, I just felt so bad about the situation. I felt like I let down so many people, um, you know, Hannah Ann being number one and myself and, uh, having to watch it on stage and kind of trying to just like contain my emotion, um, and try to stay composed was, was pretty tough. And then, you know, having her come out and having to see her for the first time. Yeah, it's a weird thing to break up with someone and have it be so public and then have to, you know, confront them and have that conversation.

Listen, I'll just start off again. And I'm not afraid to do it. Like, falling on the sword. I was 100% in the wrong with Hannah Ann and ending that relationship. out on the sword. I was 100% in the wrong with Hannah Ann and, and in that relationship, honestly, even going back to, going back to Australia and like the engagement, um, I was so confused. I was, I just, I've never been that confused in my entire life. And that last week was just such an emotional rollercoaster for me. Um, you know, I, I probably shouldn't have, you know, gotten down on one knee if I wasn't, you know, 100% sure about that. And, you know, I do know that I, I felt like I was in love with Hannah Ann and she was such a beautiful, just amazing soul that I felt like I couldn't let

go of. And I knew that I would, you know, eventually move on from my feelings and that heartache from Madison. And I just, I, I thought that was the best thing for me to do in the moment. Um, I guess, I guess what people don't completely know, and there's no way for them to know is those. So after you get engaged, right on the show and then you go on a happy couple weekends. I got to see her three times maybe. Probably three times. You're talking about Hannah Ann. Hannah Ann. Okay.

Yeah. And that's one of the things. There's just no way to prepare for it. And it's so tough to go from that whole ordeal, that whole show, and then not see the person you're engaged to, except for maybe three times in a matter of a couple months, you know, the foundation for that relationship obviously isn't insanely strong yet. And to be able to go through all that, no one really knows what happens. There's all this speculation, all these rumors come out, and then not being able to see each other for that amount of time, it's tough. And I just didn't expect it to be so difficult. And I think that, you know, I just, I didn't want to,

it sucked for me to admit to myself, but I guess, you know, as we spent time with each other and happy couple of weekends, I just, I didn't feel, I don't know, I just, I, a lot of it was my feelings for Madison, yeah, weren't completely like resolved. I hadn't 100% gotten over that. And it just, I don't know. It just didn't feel a hundred percent right for me. And I kept trying to think that it was going to get better and it didn't necessarily get better.

Listen, I, I completely relate to that. And for a couple of things where, and I'm only saying this to try to put things in perspective because, you know, here you are talking. And this experience is so hard to relate to. It's just not. It's like it's an unrelatable situation unless you've been through it. And, you know, I kind of like do I think I agree with you. Like, you know, I've had Hannah Ann on my podcast. Like, yeah, you did her wrong and you've owned that.

Like, and know, I've had Hannah Ann on my podcast. Like, yeah, you did her wrong and you've owned that. Like, and that sucks. But the reality is in life and in relationships outside of The Bachelor, like breakups are messy and sometimes people are done wrong in relationships intentionally or not. Like you don't have to be a bad person to do someone wrong in relationships. That's just how they work. But you know, when I, when, when Vanessa and I broke up, there's literally a meme out there of like five minutes after he got engaged and like and it's like i'm like a deer in headlights and the truth is like i was literally a fucking deer in headlights kind of like i just the show just ended i like you know i came up from like air and i'm literally like what the fuck did i just do now granted i was very much in love with vanessa when i proposed to her like she was literally the only person i had feelings

for and like um when we had our happy couples there was immediate like drama between us and turmoil and there were plenty of moments where like i don't i had i had questions immediately right the only difference between you and i in this situation is I, there was no one else, right? That I had feelings for. So I, I, I tried to muscle it through here. You are just to try to put it in perspective for people listening is like, you had the situation with Madison. Like, I can't imagine if I had that situation, having faced the immediate problems that Vanessa and I had, what my actions would have been, you know what I'm saying? Like, because Vanessa and I had these problems and I've talked to other leads in the past, like everyone's been in your shoes and some people like, you know, look at Ari,

right? And so just to try to put her in perspective, like I totally empathize with what you were thinking with Hannah Ann and for better or worse, like whether you were right or wrong. And like, we both agree that like, yeah, Hannah Ann was the kind of the victim here, if you will. But what was it that didn't feel right? What didn't feel right specifically? I think that, honestly, I just, I feel like maybe the two of us didn't challenge each other enough. like maybe the two of us didn't challenge each other enough. And I think I started to truly see that when you are now just in pure isolation with each other and you don't have any of the show there and you're not able to just be a normal couple, which just, it sucked. I wanted to give

us a chance, just get to the real world and see what that was like. But I think that mixed with my unresolved feelings for Madison. And then the fact that it's such a tricky situation because i want to be able to vent to her and i want to be able to like lean on her about that but i can't because that's just so like inappropriate and that's not what she wants to hear obviously and it just it was a really difficult situation for me. And I just like, I really struggle with it. And yeah, it was just tough. And you, and you like, you kind of already said it, but you kind of agree, like, I mean, hindsight's 20-20 and like,

I kind of joked when I talk to people, it's just like, you don't, like, I'm not defending Peter. He was wrong about that. But like, his brain was broken in that moment, where it's just like, you're so stressed out, but like having a clear head now, like you you said you probably wouldn't have proposed to her now that you have a clearer head in that moment right i mean it's right right now i i definitely yeah i can own that and i think that the thing for me to have done was yeah to leave not engaged not end the relationship but and not

have that kind of pressure on us but But hey, you live and you learn. And believe me, I feel horrible taking away that first engagement from her, from myself. Article. I mean, hey, everyone, I bet you're sitting on your couch a lot and you're looking at your furniture. I'm so thankful for my article couch. It's so comfortable. Well, you are. You are because you have them but imagine the people who are just like stuck looking at their old couch and they thought about getting a new one or yeah literally last night i was like thank god i'm not on my old like uncomfortable couch i know well uh i'll tell you what article we've talked about it uh i have an article couch i've

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That's helixsleep.com slash V-I-A-L-L for up to $200 off. And you know what? It does suck. And that's all you can do. And having been on Hannah Ann's shoes when I was on Caitlyn's season, granted, we didn't get proposed. But one line I said to Caitlyn at AFR was like, I prepared this whole speech, right? Like I had this kind of moment that I was... And I gave her this moment.

She let me talk. And I did this whole thing. And then she broke up with me. Granted, she did what she had to do. And, you know, and she ended up doing me a favor long-term, but I certainly didn't think that at the time. Right. I felt that way about Hannah Ann.

So when Hannah Ann said that, I was just like, yeah, I literally said to Caitlin, you took that moment away from me. But you know what? Yeah. Breakups are messy sometimes. And it's like, you know, there's not much you can do and like you you didn't you weren't malicious about it you know and i will say like i remember struggling with it a lot and yeah there were thoughts like should i just should am i giving

up too early should like should i continue this and just my thought process was that it just it wasn't it honestly like yeah was it going to suck no matter what absolutely but it wasn't fair to her to keep dragging her through this if i knew that i wasn't 100 there it wasn't, honestly, like, yeah, was it going to suck no matter what? Absolutely. But it wasn't fair to her to keep dragging her through this. If I knew that I wasn't 100% there, it wasn't fair to myself. And that just kind of like led me to kind of do it a little bit early. You know, it's funny when breakups, and it sounds like I already know the answer, but if you take away the guilt of hurting her feelings, right? And you take away that, when you broke feelings, right. And you take away the, that when you,

when you broke up with her and you guys walked away in your gut, did you feel like you made the right decision? Yeah. Yeah. You know what? And that's, I think that's in the end, all that matters. And if you, and I'm guessing fast forward six months, I don't want to speak for Hannah Ann, but like, you know, we talked in the podcast she's upset and hurt and and she's probably still processing it but it sounds like deep down she feels the same way you know like right she seems to be doing okay and i know again who knows from my time like

i know how i felt about caitlin in that moment is far different than how i feel about that situation now you know sometimes time just moves on. I do. Yeah. Time heals all wounds. And I mean, yeah. Did it hurt like crazy? Yeah. And I remember I texted her and I called her, you know, later that day after she had left trying to like reach out and just, I knew she probably didn't want to hear from me, but I just, I wanted to kind of see how she was doing and, you know,

haven't heard from her since the only time I talked to her was at AFR. But yeah. Michelle, did you have a question oh she's just been saying that you told her you wanted to like get closure with hannah b yeah um so and she's yeah her bringing up closure with hannah b was it was spot on. So I'll explain what happened. Um, I, so I had watched, we get the episodes earlier to watch, like before the season premiere, I think I watched it like mid, mid December or something like that, or a little bit after, um, Hannah, I guess had been given Hannah Brown had been given the episode as well. And, uh, you know, one day I saw that she

had DM me on Instagram. Um, I didn't have her number at that point or anything. And, uh, you know, one day I saw that she had DM me on Instagram. Um, I didn't have her number at that point or anything. And she had just, uh, was just being really honest and open and was saying that, you know, wondering if I had seen the episode yet that she was kind of struggling with it. It was tough to watch, um, which it was very tough for me to watch. So she reached out to you. Hannah Brown. Yeah. She reached out to me. Okay. And, um, you know, I saw this message and we were actually on a happy couple weekend. Um, cause the two of us were watching the episode together, Hannah and I, and, uh, and I told her

about it. And I said that, you know, that Hannah Brown had reached out that, um, I think it could kind of be good for both of us just to kind of get some closure in the situation, because to be completely honest, the way that, that, I guess it ended in the second episode at the beginning of it, the way that whole like little conversation ended wasn't very definite. Like it was just kind of, to be honest, we kind of ran out of time, like for the, for that, the portion of that date, had to move on to the evening portion. And there was a little bit of just a kind of a rush there. And so I was so confused in that moment because those were so real feelings that were being brought up. And then here I'm like, I'm the bachelor and I have a group date of women that are waiting outside, waiting to continue the date.

And I'm just not in the right headspace at all. But that was a super tough date for me. And anyway, so Hannah Brown, she reached out. She wanted to see how I was doing. It was tough for both of us. I had asked Hannah Ann if it would be okay if I could communicate with Hannah Brown, if she would mind. She told me that, you know, she was fine as long as it, you know, I didn't see her in person.

If I just talked to her on the phone, she was obviously a little hesitant. She thought it was a little, you know, a little odd. And I got that. And that's why I wanted to be just very transparent with her about everything. But ultimately she, she gave me the, you know, the okay. And, you know, Hannah Brown and I just discussed discussed things and so that was what that was about okay so again not that we're insinuating that you know i i get hannah ann's perception of that situation but um it wasn't as if you because it almost seemed like, it almost seemed like you approached Hannah Ann

and be like, hey, I need closure with Hannah Brown. Yeah, I'm still thinking about Hannah Brown. And I'm still thinking about her. And again, we're in no way calling Hannah Ann a liar, but I get, fuck, if I'm in Hannah Ann's position, I see it that way, right? 100%. Especially, you know, you guys break up,

who the fuck knows what she's thinking right like but no and i totally get why that was weird and put her in a comfortable position and listen on stage like i'm in the wrong i'm i'm the bad guy i get it i'm not gonna have there's a there's not enough time on stage on a live show to kind of explain everything but you know she's in the right to be frustrated and mad at me for that. Um, but, but that's the truth. Where do you and Hannah Brown, like leave that conversation on good terms or? Yeah, no, very, very supportive of each other. Um, you know, we, you know, she'd honestly constantly check in on me. Um, cause then the weeks that ensued were pretty tough and obviously she had just been in that position. And, um, you know, I have all the respect in the world for

Hannah Brown and she's been amazing. Um, and you know, it's been respect in the world for hannah brown and she's been amazing um and you know has been there for me pretty much at all times and totally um and it's really good mutual respect and it totally makes sense that hannah would reach out wanting to know how it came across like that's something that uh we have done with each other and people on the show if if they like being the bachelor the bachelorette you everyone knows they get kind of early access to the episodes hannah brown is not going to get that access totally makes sense that hannah would reach out and just kind of be like hey do i look fine i've done that shit like we've all done that right right so that that totally makes sense um so i guess now let's

like address the kind of madison afR and how that kind of went. I know, obviously, you love your mom. You're very protective of your mom. I've been able to text with your mom a little bit. She seems great. And she's been under some heat that probably isn't fair. But at the same time, people have had a lot of opinions and comments. I mean, do you, is there anything you want to shed some light on that just kind of whole

experience? And I'll kind of give you the floor for that. Yeah. Um, so AFR, yeah, that, that was tough. Um, listen, my, my mom, my family in general, um, they're like, they're my rock and yeah, I'll defend them for the day I die. And I love them more than anything. And they, they truly just want the best for me.

Um, in regards to what occurred, you know, on stage there, um, you know, my mom said, yeah, could her, a delivery have been different? 100%. But where that was coming from was a place of just pure love, some passion. Um, you know, that's, that's who my mom is. And to be completely honest and just brutally honest, I respect the hell out of my mom for being able to do... Granted, could the delivery have been different? I'll say yes. But to be able to speak her mind and not feel the pressure to kind of

cave in to a certain narrative on live television in front of millions of people when maybe that wasn't the popular decision for my best interest or you know what she thought was my best interest that takes a strong person and that's the love of a mother and you can't argue that you can't and that's not easy to do barb didn't give a fuck she did and you gotta respect that i need to have more of that in me like you know what you know what peter i will agree with you i got the tears from her i need to do that more and so you i would you know what i would totally agree i mean yeah listen i um it's such a crazy situation and then you know barb would you know she actually texted you know she would could she have done it differently maybe maybe not on tv i don't know but if she's

a passionate person who loves her son i don't i don't fucking know but and i think yeah and i think what people saw too and honestly i think people just have to kind of you know you got to respect it almost like listen families they have confrontations they disagree we're not going to agree on everything and just like it's almost like you guys just everyone all of everyone that was watching got a taste of just us in like a living room that you know everyone has those kind of conversations and disagreements and usually it's just behind closed doors but um that was just us obviously doing it on national television, which is kind of crazy. Um, but I just, to end it all, it's just, it was all out of love. And, um, it just, it was a really, it just was a tough,

tough, it was really tough for me to kind of be in the middle of that. So two things I want to kind of give you an opportunity to clarify, um, in terms of things and credit, uh, some critics or comments people have made. One is, you know, your mom having such a big presence in your life that she was the reason that maybe you and Madison didn't work out. And two, people, and this would piss me off, people suggesting that everything about the relationship with you and Madison was somehow staged or fake, et cetera, et cetera. So can you shed some light on the conversation you had with Madison? I don't

know if it was like, I heard something about you guys met maybe the day after or whatever. Yeah, sure. And then kind of talk about that and address any of those comments that are out there. Yeah. So listen, right now from the horse's mouth none of that was fake and none of that was staged was put on by the show um making me seem like i was in to maddie and i and i really wasn't no that wasn't true when uh you know after she had come and surprised me um you know i got her number and we started talking i didn't see her again physically until on stage um but we were able to talk and, you know, have some good, honest conversations.

Conversations that, yeah, we should have had when we were dating on the show. I kind of, looking back on it, I kind of like, I feel like we should have tried to see, I've seen each other before we showed up on stage together. Like that shouldn't have been the first time. The reason we did that and we talked about it was we wanted it to be completely authentic and just not. That was a choice you guys made. It was. And I don't know if that was the best choice.

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and get matched with a counselor you'll love. If you don't love them, you can always switch. Very easy. That's betterhelp.com slash V-I-A-L-L. What conversations did you have that you said you should have had on the bachelor what kind so wait also i want to clarify so you didn't see each other physically but did you guys talk before yeah we we facetimed okay talked on the phone so you did talk i mean we all right yeah we just didn't didn't physically see each other um

and again yeah who knows that i probably wasn't the right decision but all i'm saying is you guys at least you guys talked i mean yeah i mean okay yeah and all those feelings were real that got brought back um and then going from listen just being so honest you know her coming on stage and seeing her like i i didn't know how it was going to truly go but um obviously I think you know she was put in a very difficult position very uncomfortable position and I hated to see her in that you know kind of environment um honestly maybe just like a quick apology coming on stage just you know in regards I know one big thing with with my was in Australia for the family visits. Yeah, we stayed outside for about three hours and talking.

Three hours? Dang. That was true. But is that all Madison or is that just kind of the show or just you guys talking? It was, to be fair, it was me trying to convince her that she should come in and talk to my parents okay so barbara's being totally honest and truthful in that moment and but i'll and i'll defend both sides that was the truth but the truth also granted it was my it was my my actions that was keeping maddie you know so hesitant to do it and not in the right headspace um but yeah all of that waiting,

I get my parents being frustrated. I totally get that. It just set it up for failure from the beginning. So maybe a quick apology. It could have gone a long way, but it's a tough situation. And I hated seeing Maddie uncomfortable. I hated seeing my parents uncomfortable.

And I agree with you. And honestly, this is just my personal opinion i don't know how important that is because it is a crazy situation right yeah you're filming a show who the fuck knows what's going on i get why why your mom would be frustrated right i get why madison took her time i am curious about um once you once afR was over and then here you are with Madison, real world, the show's over. I mean, granted it just ended. What were some of the reasons you guys ultimately decided it wasn't going to work? Yeah. So that was tough. We left the stage together. We were supposed to do some press and we just, we couldn't do it. We just weren't in the right

headspace. She ended up going, uh, just, you know, she went to her hotel and talk with, you know, her family for a bit. And then she came over to my hotel. Um, and we were able to chat for a little bit that night. Um, that was mainly just kind of trying to be there for each other and just, uh, and support each other. We didn't have like some in-depth combos that night. She went back to her place the next day, her mom had flown out and came out there and

spent some time with her. So I didn't see her that day. We just talked on the phone. And the second day is when we pretty much spent the entire day together. And that was going to be, okay, let's figure this out. Is this something that we can do? And I remember going over to her hotel and that was a really rough day. It was super sad. I remember for like probably six hours, we just – we stayed on our bed there. We laughed. We cried. We hugged each other.

We said nothing. We talked. Like it was rough. But we went into that. Classic breakup. It was. It was. But what this one was, it was like it had been – the tone the entire time was – was and i think i mean i've been through i don't know if everyone else has but you go through break like relationships where you have a lot

of ups and downs and you may be broken up a couple times but there comes that one breakup where you know it's actually done now and it's like there isn't going to be a second like there's no more but also i just want to point out like when i say classic breakup like if you've and it's what's what's fascinating for other people who might have questioned the authenticity of you in madison like i've had those breakups for like you're like you're like it's like a it's like a four-hour marathon or a five-hour event where you like there's moments of laughing and crying in silence and sitting there maybe you like pause and watch an episode of the office i don't fucking know it's truly a fucking marathon and i think there's a lot of people listening can totally fucking relate to that which is crazy is that

like for anyone who doubts that like you guys experienced it not having dated for months or years which usually you know is the cause of a breakup like that but right certainly this was like this magnified situation it was we were we were taking videos we were we were singing we were listening to spotify that having super serious talk with them let's let's go to the courthouse magnified situation it was we were we were taking videos we were we were singing we were listening to spotify that having super serious talk we're saying let's let's go to the courthouse right now and let's let's just take care of all our problems like obviously it's a joke but like you know like all that stuff and then um but anyways i remember when we actually got to actually serious talking this is not easy for me i lead with my heart all the time and i just

that's who I am. But we were both like, listen, we need to just like legit talk about this logically, remove all emotion and feelings from this, just be purely logical. And that's what we did. And honestly, we kind of just proved my mom right by the end of it about the stuff we talked about. A lot of people think like, you know, it was all about sex and it was all about saving herself for marriage. And that was something that was going to be the biggest thing that Peter couldn't do, which is frustrating to see. Cause you know, to be honest, that wasn't the biggest thing for me. Um, and I, again, I respect Maddie like no other than I always will, but it was other things like, you know, she was also saving herself for, for just being able to go travel with, with her significant other until marriage. And what I mean by that, like, you know, she was also saving herself for, for just being able to go travel with,

with her significant other until marriage. And what I mean by that, like, you know, travel, like something I love to do, go on, you know, travel, explore new places, go, go to international destinations. We weren't going to be able to do that and stay in the same hotel. Wow. You know, she wasn't going to be able to, you know, come over if we, if she moved out to LA and I had my apartment and she had hers, she wasn't going to be able to spend the night with me. And that was something that she had just made a decision for herself, which again, I respect like no other. And that sounds like a small thing, but for me, that could become a big thing if I was never going to be able to do that for possibly

two years until we were married or whatnot. That's not a small thing. And so just also to clarify too, it's not that she wouldn't be allowed to travel. It's that if you were to travel, it would be kind of a production of always having separate hotel rooms. Right. Right. You guys like, you know,

like a lot of couples do, especially in their twenties or thirties or whatever. Um, let's go to Europe. Like, right. They don't get separate hotel rooms. Exactly.

And like, usually, and that's what, if you want to do that, great like usually and that's what if you want to do that great but certainly that's definitely very two different lifestyles that's a lifestyle thing that's so tough and like just for me like i'm personally someone that i i bond a lot in like my relationships like just spending the night with each other not even being physical whatsoever but just spending the night falling asleep waking up the next morning just having

breakfast like that's something that I used to bond. And that wasn't going to be the case with us. That was going to be tough to get over. So let me ask you this, just to rewind a little bit. I think a lot of people, including myself when watching the show, on the fantasy suite date, when you were very honest and you and Madison had this, not necessarily fight, but she, and I was very defensive of Matt. I loved how Madison handled that situation. I thought you both handled it great, right? You're

just both two honest people speaking, and I hate to say this, their truth, but. This is my truth. Yeah, I fucking hate it, but like, I don't know how else to say it, right? Right. Anyways, what didn't make sense to me was like, well, why don't you guys just hang out and talk through the night and it sounds like after hearing what you're saying to me is like that also wasn't an option for madison because of like she just doesn't do sleepovers whether you sleep or not is that is that true to say that that wasn't like she she wasn going to have an overnight on The Bachelor? Yeah, I would say so.

Yeah, I would agree with that. I think just to be fair, though, we were both in such a weird, crazy headspace that night. And listen, I hurt her like no other. And so I understand her probably not wanting to have anything really to do with me that night. I know she probably, I'm, I'm pretty, I think she, we've talked about that and she's admitted like, yeah, she probably should have, you know, at least allowed us to talk maybe for a couple hours and then, you know, I could leave and go back to my room or whatnot. But in the moment it was tough, you know, and I've kind of heard from like third parties. I don't know how accurate it is that like, that wasn't an option,

you know? So I'm, I'm curious, what do you think? Let's say that you hadn't had an intimate night with anyone else. Madison asked you this question and you're like, surprise, I didn't. I'm amazing. Do you think she would have talked with you through the night and had the overnight? Or do you think that date would have ended at some point?

You know what I'm saying? Because you know how it's filmed, right? Like the cameras go away and whether you guys hook up or talk all night, all that we know as an audience is that you guys spent the night together. And, you know, Madison being who she is and a woman of faith,

obviously it's not unfair. I don't think it's unfair to say that Madison, certainly that perception of how she carries herself and her community and not wanting people to think she spent the night um do you think she would have still you know you know i'm saying do you think she would have like still opted out of an overnight and made it made it clear the audience that she wasn't going to do that does that make make sense? Honestly, yeah, it does. Honestly, yes. I feel like if everything would have gone the way that she needed to have gone at that dinner, and then we would have, you know, I would have brought out the envelope and read the letter from Chris. I do feel like she would have accepted. And I feel like,

you know, that was the first time that she had told me, you know, that she was saving herself for marriage. I feel like we would have gone back to the room and she would have probably there. I don't know if it would have been on camera or not, but she would have just told me that she was saving herself for marriage. I feel like we would have gone back to the room and she would have probably there. I don't know if it would have been on camera or not, but she would have just told me that she wasn't comfortable fully spending the night. Like she'd love to take as many hours as we want to talk. And I would have respected that and understood that. But I do think that she at least would have gone back

for a couple hours just to get, because we never had, not once did we ever have off camera time. I had it with Hannah Ann and with Victoria. Not once that Maddie and I have it. Which is nuts for me to think about. In that world, that's, I don't know how to explain it to anyone else. I mean, it seems like a few hours and that's what it is,

but it's the only time you have and therefore it's so valuable. The first real, real off-camera time, we had a little bit after, you know, The first real, real off-camera time, we had a little bit after, you know, when she came to surprise me, but the real off-camera, the first time was, this is crazy, after the show was over, after AFR. Wow. In person. That's nuts. Let me ask you this, like after hearing you talk about that, and I've actually been very kind of, I've defended Madison with this kind of critique that she's gotten, is that, you know, a lot of people will be like, well, you knew what you signed up for. Everyone has different belief systems. But Madison's is pretty extreme in the sense that, and just because it's not typical doesn't mean it's wrong.

I'm not criticizing her choice to have that lifestyle. But I am wondering, is it fair? And do you think, like, what was she doing on that show? If knowing that, like, you know, I don't like, like it always bugged me when knowing that like you know i don't like like it always bugged me when people were like oh you're the sexual bachelor because i got sex i know you've been called the sexual bachelor because people knew that you you know the whole windmill thing you may not be mr i have sex all the time but you are someone who isn't emotional sexual like you you it's a big part like you said it's a part of your

life right and madison certainly knew more about you than you knew about her on night one right do you think like maybe like you wonder like what madison why she even bothered if it was going to be like and what and it like i'm and i'm just thinking out loud here what bachelor could she have worked with you know what i'm saying like she has a very specific belief system and i respect the hell out of it right but it is very specific and it's certainly not typical so unless like you know and i don't and i you know i don't think i think she's a great girl and i have never met luke parker but i don't think it's fair to madison suggests she should be with Luke partner just because, you know, they're very open about their faith. But at the same time, like, you know what I'm saying? Like,

is it, was it fair to you to go on the show and take a slot of one of 30 people, which is not a lot for anyone who's like been to a bar on a Friday night. If you haven't met someone you want to marry every night, then don't think that 30 people is a lot. Is it fair to you to have gone on the show knowing how strict she was with her belief system? Listen, I'll tell you this. I'm thankful that she did. I really am. I am happy that she did in the end, even through all this, everything that I feel like I learned from her in our relationship, I'll forever be grateful for that. I know, and I've heard that criticism about her. We've talked about that and, you know, I don't want to speak too much on her behalf. I'm sure she'll address stuff like that, but just a little bit, just a background for people to know, you know, she wasn't the one that initially signed herself up. She had had some friends that are family friends that signed herself up.

And if for her, you know, it actually was more of, I guess she, it was like a, why not kind of situation? Like, this seems like a great opportunity. Why not? Like maybe this could work for me. Maybe it couldn't. And, um, I remember bringing up that question to her, like, listen, you knew the kind of guy that, that I was. Um, there was no secret of that from with the windmill stuff. Like, why, why did you feel like this would be a good idea for me specifically? And she's like, I hate when people say that because your past doesn't necessarily just define you, what you're going to be in your future. And I, these are her words, you know, like I, yeah, I can't control what your past was, but if, if it were to just be the two of us in the end, like I'm okay with that.

And I didn't need someone that was, you know, just like me and had my exact same beliefs. Like she would tell me many times, like that was some of the stuff that was like endearing to her about me that we were so different in a lot of ways. And, um, you know, I know she like, again, I don't want to speak on her behalf too much, but one thing that stuck out, stood out to me a lot that I respected about her, you know, I know she like, again, I don't want to speak on her behalf too much. But one thing that stood out to me a lot that I respected about her, you know, what she said was she thought at first, you know, she wanted someone like, you know, her dad that was maybe, you know, you know, very strong in his faith and just more, just someone more like her dad. And what she realized going through the show was that she doesn't need someone like her dad. She is very similar like her dad. And what she realized going through the show was that she doesn't need someone like her dad. She is very similar to her dad and it could actually be good to have someone a little bit different. And she had told me she had dated people that were very

similar to her and that didn't work out. And again, I don't know who, what the perfect match, who the perfect match for Madison is, but just to kind of defend her on that. Um, I just, I don't think it's fair for people to kind of attack her and, uh, and her intentions for going on the show necessarily. I do feel like they were pure and I know what we have in our relationship

was real. And I know that both of us know that we are not compatible with each other and we're not right for each other. And I have 100% clarity in that now, but you know, that doesn't change how we did feel for each other. Totally. And again, I, I, I certainly still buy that overall because I, I get annoyed for the people who do go on the show and act like they're only there for love, you know,

and I'm not saying they're only there for Instagram followers. People are there as Madison admitted that she was just like, fuck it. Why not? And I'm sure I'm certain she didn't say fuck it. But, but she, you know, you're just kind of like, why not? Like, let's just, I guess, I guess I'll go. Right. Right. Right. And then she just like so many people before her got caught up yeah in a in a crazy world and and by then it was probably too late and you can certainly criticize madison or or question like why didn't she leave earlier and the only the only thing that like and i told

her this that i would have told me sooner was was yeah like not wait so long for the whole yeah and i didn't consider an ultimatum to this day i don't it was her just expressing what i asked all the women to do the first night maybe just express it to me a little bit sooner but the nature of the show it's tough yeah i'll defend medicine there where it's not entirely up to her exactly and so uh yeah like once once you're in that world it's uh and again again, I'll defend the producers more than people sometimes want. They're not the manipulators that sometimes people like to say when things don't go their way, but they are making a show and there is a structure behind it. And how things play out can be very timed.

Right. how things play out is is can be can be very timed um right um i will say though this is this is like a behind the scenes i hope i'm allowed to say this um i'm so bad at proposing and this is why um who's good at proposing peter honestly that'd be like can you imagine someone's like hey guys what are you good at well if i'm gonna be honest i'm so fucking good at like proposing to chicks i'm a damn good proposer okay yeah that just means you have a lot of practice i don't want a lot of practice i'm okay sucking at this uh this is embarrassing it's kind of funny um i i was so nervous right and so i'm like shaking and like i'm getting down on one knee and this is a huge moment in my life, huge moment in Hannah Ann's life.

And I open up the box. I take the ring out. I put the ring on her finger. I see her like get all excited. I get up, kiss her to give her a hug. Realize I never asked her to marry me. And I had to like redo the whole proposal again and actually say the words like oh my god freaking dumbo but i i have uh uh yeah like listen spoiler sometimes uh you you're you're only human on the show and you have to you have to redo things excuse me you have to redo things

uh the whole point of the show is hopefully to get engaged. And I forgot to ask those. I was also like on my season, I had literally broke up with Raven and then what? 30 minutes go by. And then Vanessa comes and I'm just like, you know, like my brain, like I literally couldn't move my neck. I was so stressed out.

So like, I mean, I pretty sure I remember to ask Vanessa to marry me, but I asked like, you do some things over and over uh the first time i told andy i loved her uh was in the ocean and it was a moment where like it just felt real and i just it was such a great moment but you know what we weren't miked and right and i just it felt right and i wanted to tell her i loved her and i knew i

fucked up and i came we came back from the ocean. And I told the producers, I'm sorry. And they're like, well, fuck you. But we're going to have to do that again. And you know what? And later that night, so what people saw, me saying, Andy, I love you for the first time, was like something we just had to redo. Right. I mean, the audience needs to see it.

The audience needs to hear that. And so like that, that happens. I don't think, I don't think we're, we're peeling too back many layers about like, you know, and in normal life, that's a, that's a human thing, right? You laugh it off. But if this is a TV show, that would look really weird to the audience. And so you have to capture that. So. Unfortunately, yeah. If it would have worked out with the two of

us that would have been a really fun uh clip for the blooper reel to put that on uh that that is what are you gonna do um i think maybe now it's appropriate to kind of talk about where you're at now obviously you've been um seen with kelly uh yeah and uh i think people are curious about that and you know you and kelly have kind of teased you guys hanging out and and on on tiktoks on social uh maybe as a result of the cat being out of the bag so to speak with with uh paparazzi photos um i guess you know before i ask any questions why don't why don't I just let you kind of talk about that? Yeah, I know for sure. So there's a lot of stuff that people don't know.

And honestly, like my relationship with Kelly is there's been like a lot of just things that have just been kind of very serendipitous. And you go all the way back to the very beginning, us running into each other before any of this stuff started her needing a sign, getting the sign of, you know, running into me. That was crazy. Um, what I don't know if a lot of people know is, you know, obviously the show happened. We, it didn't work out for us on that show. Um, but then I actually ended up running. Oh, shoot.

Can you hear me? Yeah, I can. I always said it. Internet's unstable. Anyway, so everyone knows about that meeting before the show. I don't think people know is after the show. This was over the Super Bowl. I was in Miami. I had the opportunity to go to the Super Bowl there with my brother. And I ran uh, on Saturday night before the super bowl. Were you single at this point? Yes. I had, I had just, uh, just broken up with Hannah Ann. Um,

and, uh, yeah, we, uh, I was with, I was with Jason and Blake and my brother and we'd gone from like one kind of concert club to, to another club there. And,. And we go in and I look up and I see Tyler. And I'm like, no way. I knew Tyler was in Miami, but I hadn't run into him yet. Then I see Tyler. I wave at him and he like starts to come down. And I look to his left and it's Kelly. And I was like, my jaw just dropped.

I was like, what? Like, no way. What are the odds? We run into each other randomly on both coasts of the United States. Like that's insane. Um, completely unplanned. And so she comes down as a really quick brief, just, you know, Hey, like couldn't hear anything. Um, just gave her a hug. Um, was she with Tyler or was it like she ran into Tyler? She had just run into Tyler. So she was with one of her friends. Um, cause I guess she lived, you know, she's from Chicago, but she also lives in, in Florida

sometimes too, part of the year. And she was with, I guess, one of her girlfriends. She had just run into Tyler and they had just met, I guess, when I walked in. And just kind of just crazy coincidence. Anyways, it was just a really brief, like, hi, how you doing? Gave her a hug. And then we ended up getting out of there um it was pretty late but um that was crazy and then you know fast forward like i still didn't have her number or anything i had never gotten her

number from the beginning when i first met her uh before the show and one thing i think it's important to just get out there is and kelly will be the first one to admit this. Kelly was not good for the show. It was not comfortable ever. Never felt in her element. Um, was almost like too smart almost for the show. Just always kind of over, you know, was trying to be two steps ahead, almost tried to overthink it a little bit and she'll be the first to admit it. And I, and I agree. Well, I mean, maybe not too smart, but maybe in her own head because she overanalyzed the situation. yeah i can agree with that um and uh and so i feel like you know for what it's worth i feel like maybe just our relationship on the show it didn't it didn't really it didn't really play out in the best way for us and we just it just wasn't

going to work on the show if it was ever going to work for us, if that makes sense. Anyways, fast forward. This is now a couple of weeks ago. I'm out with Dylan and Dylan and Devin. And I was texting Christian. And, you know, we're good friends. And asking her if she wanted to come out with us. Christian, is that Demi's ex? Yeah. Yeah.

And so she's like, yeah. She comes out with us, meets us out out she's with kelly me not knowing this at the time when i'm texting christian so they show up at this place that we're at i see kelly again jaw drops i'm like this is insane like what are the odds of this um so we obviously chat we end up going we meet some other people just go out have a you know fun time and just hanging out and um you know that's when i got her number and we started to communicate and uh just just stay in touch um she's always been supportive of me so um we started communicating she ends up going back to Chicago and then you know some stuff happens um you know she you know kind of with her family and so

long story short um I wasn't working so I thought I'd go out there spend some you know, kind of with her family. And so long story short, um, I wasn't working. So I thought I'd go out there, spend some time with her, kind of take her, her mind off some things. Um, and that's what I did. And so flew out to Chicago. This is kind of like right, right when everything was kind of starting to hit with like the quarantine stuff. Like nothing was like crazy, like staying at home. Um, when all those pictures came out, like I'd already been here for quite a bit. Um, you know, I'm, I'm here right now in Chicago. And it kind of just became like a thing where we've always gotten along really well, and just had really good chemistry. And we just enjoy each other's company. And I just decided to kind of quarantine up here with Dustin as well. And he

lives in Chicago. And part of that logic too, was, you know, I live at home. Everyone knows that my parents are in their sixties. I still have to work as an essential worker with the airline. So I thought it'd be safer to not be going home all the time and just be staying here and make this kind of my home base. So kind of worked out that way as well. Are we dating? No. Do I love spending time with her? Absolutely. And, you know, you're not dating. No, no, we're, yeah, we're, we're you know you're not dating no no we're yeah we're we're not we're not dating could i could i see that in the future i'm always transparent yeah of course i could definitely see in the future i feel like i'd be extremely lucky and

very happy if that happened are you saying that because like um so i guess what you know that the obvious question then is well why why aren't you dating if you can see it why are you reluctant or just taking things slow given all the shit you've been through or is there something about there okay that's it i i if anyone right now like i am the last person that needs to kind of rush into any kind of relationship anything else i just you know had an engagement that didn't work out. I just was, you know, trying to pursue things with another woman that didn't work out. And that's why right now it's just taking it really, really slow and just enjoying each other's time and company. And, um, you know, I've been very honest with her and

she completely agrees. She tells me, tells me that as well. And just taking things slow. You know, I'm not in any rush. I've learned my lesson. That's the last thing I need to be doing right now. But I think the world of her and could I see something in the future? I could. Well, I mean, that's okay. So it sounds like maybe you guys obviously enjoy, like you said, you like each other.

So it's more about you just trying to take things super slow and less about you guys aren't sure if you maybe want to give it a shot but it's just yeah i think are you just more are you just more cautious yeah that's fair more cautious just wanting to take things really slow um i don't think anyone would be surprised to hear that i feel like i've been through like an emotional rollercoaster and, but Kelly, you know, yeah, especially since we started,

you know, reconnected. She's been so insanely supportive, always there for me. And, um, I think, yeah,

just taking things really slow and I definitely, I definitely could see a future there. So, I mean, like, I know you mentioned that you didn't, that Kelly would admit that maybe she wasn't good for the show, but just so like to try to address everything that people might be asking while they're listening

to this is in the moment uh you sent Kelly home on the show like what was your thinking yeah that was um Kelly and I's relationship was it was so confusing for me and so tough to like just really navigate um I just felt like I don't know I just didn't feel like the Kelly that I had met pre-show and like we only spent maybe two hours with each other but that Kelly was so different from any Kelly I ever spent time with on the show. Um, maybe aside from like the time that I got to take her flying for the first date that, you know, when we went in the first week, it was just some time by ourselves. It just, she wasn't in her comfort zone. And, um, you know,

that date that was a three on one with, with her and with Hannah and with Victoria, um, I had really felt the relationship really start to really take off with Hannah. And, um, I remember like that letter that she had, you know, read that day just touched me a lot and I really saw potential and, you know, Victoria, I know there's a lot of opinions of my relationship with her and why I felt strongly for her or whatnot. But the fact of the matter is I did. And, uh, it was worth it for me to keep fighting in that moment. And with Kelly, I just just i didn't feel like necessarily i was getting i don't know just just enough i don't yeah i mean honestly it's funny

because when i when i saw the pictures you had kelly i was it's probably like anyone else being like well why the fuck did he just send her home you know it was just like right and i'm thinking out loud here um and your experience is different than mine. Because again, I really just only connected with Vanessa romantically. It just, and nothing against the other women. It was, it was just, it was, it was Vanessa. But I also think about, like, here's an example. Like, just thinking about my experience. Like, I became good friends with Demi after, like, both.

She wasn't on my season. But I wouldn't be surprised. And I don't know this to be true because she wasn't on my season i wouldn't be surprised um that had demi been on my season i would have you know sure i'm certainly she would have been on for a while but i don't think i ever would have considered her as an option romantically and again i never would but my point But my point is, like, I love Demi as a friend. And I don't think I would have thought that having her been on my season. And I only point that out because, again, you're not dating Kelly and who knows what's going to happen. But I guess even though it didn't make sense to me when I saw the pictures, when I saw the pictures, the bachelor process is an imperfect situation. And it is so good at maximizing feelings

if you do have feelings based off of certain types of attraction. But it's probably, it's safe to say, not conducive for all relationships, especially of how they form and kind of different ways people connect with each other so i guess it's very safe it makes sense that if let's say you and kelly continue to hang out and maybe it turns into a dating situation why maybe it's just a slower burn

and the bachelor's by definition not a slow burn it's almost impossible yeah to kind of have that occur it would it would be certain it's it's it's it's fascinating yeah, to kind of have that occur. It would be certain. It's fascinating just that storyline of you guys met Kelly. Well, what does Barb think? What do you guys think Barb thinks? I don't know. I don't really know. I mean, it's funny because I didn't really get it because, like, I met Kelly.

It's funny because I posted this picture, and I just didn't think you guys were like hanging out or anything was going on and i i then i've told the story on my podcast but like i text kelly is like hey let's just like i have this perfect caption not with peter which is like not saying anything other than the fact that you're literally she's literally not with peter and i remember her being like you know like i'm like what like i don't like this is a harmless fucking caption i'm like what is the problem and it kind of it makes a lot of sense now but uh and then like there are people commenting about like oh you're on barb's shit list and i didn't really understand that but like barb has been out there yeah because like i don't i don't fucking people are people are are interested but i guess it sounds like people but i'm pointing it I guess it sounds like people –

but I'm pointing it out because it sounds like the perception is that Barb likes Kelly and she's happy. Yeah, no. Friendship. Yeah, my mom, she's – I don't know if it's the Chicago thing, the Chicago ties. Is your mom from Chicago? Yeah, she's from Chicago.

So not too far from where Kelly kelly lives um out here so um definitely yeah definitely you know likes kelly listen we'll see where it goes um let me i just we're backtracking here because you absolutely stood up to your mom on afr like you you you know your mom said her piece and you said yours and you know what madison said her she's like yeah again once again i was just like it was a it was great tv it was fucking awkward and you had three people who were like this is how i feel um i just want to give you an opportunity to say it and just reiterate like you've already talked about why you and madison didn't work out but for the critics out there like you made your own choice. You and

Madison made your choice. And yeah, maybe you guys ended up proving your mom right, but your decision was yours. And if you guys, if you decide to stay date Kelly or whatever, we can all joke, but like you are making these own decisions on your, on your own. Listen, yeah. I, I know everyone loves to joke about you know my relationship i'm too close to my parents or whatnot or living at home and but for the record 100 straight uh maddie and i we had our discussions our conversations in private that was 100 our decision um that really truly was not my mom you know ending that at all i promise um in regards to kelly you know my mom is not the

one setting me up randomly running into Kelly and three different spots around the country. And then, uh, you know, eventually trying to pursue something. So, um, yeah, that's it. It's not my mom. I promise you that. Okay. I just, I got that sense, but I just wanted to make sure. I let me, if I can to also clarify this whole thing about living at home, people love to go off on it. It's really not a weird thing for me. And I'm just going to set it, answer it for once and for all. I, there's a couple of reasons.

A, I'm never home. And that's a, because of my job. When this pandemic's not going on, I love to travel. I am always visiting friends wherever it's a benefit I get to use for the airlines where I take advantage of it. And even if I didn't, from working, I'm home maybe half the month. So I'm not looking forward to just paying rent for half a month of being there. I'd like to probably save up and try to own a place one day instead. Especially in LA.

Exactly. And then another one, it's just, it's not weird coming from a Cuban culture. It's very, very different from American culture. It just is not, neither one is right. They're just different. And being very, very close to your family, living with your family for a long time, it's just accepted in that culture. And it's just, I guess people don't necessarily know that. And so it looks strange and odd and they want to like make comments, but it just, it just isn't. And it's just the way I've grown up and, you my grandmother you know she used to live with us before she passed away like the family just stays together and that's part of the cuban culture but um i just i like laugh at all that i'm like guys it's really not that big of a deal like i've lived on my own don't worry

like i've done it i can do it and i'm gonna do it soon so yeah i mean listen i i get it i really appreciate you uh sharing is it's kind of the beast of the show uh we all tease things that are different and um yeah and and with that said i mean i i know i've i've had you know i've been a supporter of you and listen i i just want to point out even to the people listening i've talked to peter peter uh on my podcast here now and he's been on before i've talked to Peter on my podcast here now, and he's been on before. I've talked to Peter offline. This guy's never complained to me about the show, about producers, about anything. And again, I'm not saying Peter's made mistakes, and he's been criticized for them, and he's opened himself up, but you've never bitched about it.

You've never complained. And to me, that says a lot more about someone and their integrity versus someone who's so quick to take credit when things are going well and so quick to blame others when things don't go their way. And I sometimes think that's lost on people who watch the show, having not been in it, that we just aren't at liberty to always say and things, but like even offline, you've never bitched to me about anyone else. And I think that that shows someone who, again, not perfect is willing to own his, his own mistakes. And in the long run, I think you're a better person for it. No, I appreciate that, man. And I, that's just, you know, that's kind of just been my mindset

always. I, I, even through all of this, I know it sounds insane, but I am still so insanely grateful for the, for the experience and for having this chance to, you know, the last year of my life, you know, I, I really can't complain. And yeah, I would have done so many things differently in hindsight, but you can't do that. And, you know, moving forward, I do feel like I'm a much better person, stronger person at the end of this. And it's something that to be said for that, and it will not get lost on me. And, um, but those are kind words. So thank you. What, what is the one thing that, uh, you have learned about yourself specifically through being the bachelor, maybe not even the bachelorette that you think you could work on.

I mean, like I said earlier, having a little bit more of Barb in me and I'm being so real and like putting my foot down in situations. I've been the first to admit, yeah, I'm a people pleaser and that's just kind of who I am. And it's uncomfortable for me to kind of get out of that and just kind of push back a little bit. But I've definitely seen, you know, just and then just getting tough skin. Oh, my God, you see, I mean, Nick, I know you probably dealt with it, like all the hate that comes with this and all the opinions online and whatnot. It's insane. And like, it's never ending. So just getting like that tough skin is something that I'm very, very thankful that I've started to get and not let that get you down. Cause that's like

a dangerous dark hole, but you've done a pretty good job there, but I would, I would agree with you on the push back. Would you say that the criticism you've got about being too wishy-washy and indecisive as a result of you not standing up for like where do I guess what I'm saying is where what's the difference between you maybe not standing up for yourself and the criticism you've gotten for your indecisiveness you know I would say so one of the biggest things I think for me that like criticism that I've gotten is in regards to my relationship with Victoria F and how I handle that situation and not standing up for myself and not putting my foot down and being just, I guess, possibly a little indecisive with that. But

I'll be, I'll just be so honest, like with that relationship, that was one of the relationships that I was most proud of myself with how I handled and never once like agreed with any critics on that relationship. For me, I've said time and time again, that grace is something that is not given and not practiced nearly enough as much as it should be in this world by people, by everybody. And everybody messes up and screws up. And the definition of grace is one that's given and not deserved. And so like my entire relationship, that entire, listen, there was a ton of stuff that wasn't aired and no one will ever see great things about that relationship I had with Victoria that was allowing me to possibly continue to give her grace time and time again. But that

was one of the proudest moments I had of a relationship and how I handled it because it would have been so much easier to just screw you and I'm done with you and just like storm off and just give up and end it. And I didn't do that. And I didn't want to give up. And before I was a hundred percent sure that relationship was done. I don't know that's kind of i guess not that's kind of off topic but no i appreciate you sharing that but yeah i mean also like victoria f is like she's made her mistakes and certainly but and i've i've you know i've i said victoria f was hot on one of my early episodes so i couldn't like defend her without people assuming I'm just trying to sleep with her. But yeah, she's certainly imperfect. I don't know her that well, but I know who she is and that's someone who emotes and

certainly, and she owned up on, on, on, on women tell all she owned that and that she apologized to you. But like, I don't know. I just like people where I know what they are and who they are and that they can apologize. And sometimes that's lost on, you know, we like watching the perfect people, at least who they come across as perfect and people get bad beats. But so I appreciate you sharing that about Victoria F.

And I'm sure she would appreciate hearing that too. She's had a tough run as well. No, yeah, she has, but I don't, she's a, she's a, she's a good person and, uh, people need to see that. So, and they have. Yeah. Um, well before I let you go, I mean, any kind of final thoughts and things that you want to talk about or get out there? Um, Oh man. Um, I don't know, man. I just, I kind of been a little bit. Yeah. Well, I haven't spoken on anything yet. So thank you for having me, you know, being the first person and just kind of give me a chance to get this out. I finally kind of felt comfortable addressing stuff and I don't know, I guess I'll just kind of end with, you know, listen, I, again, I know that a ton of mistakes were made and people are going to have their

opinions. You know, I, I went into the show wanting to give people like that love story, just me being that romantic, like that they could live vicariously through it and care about any of the drama that didn't do anything for me. I think I probably had the most dramatic show they've ever had after, you know, it's all said and done. But who knows?

Maybe the story's not over yet. And the crazy ending that no one- You are a romantic. You are a romantic. Yeah, you are a romantic. That's a nice tease, Peter. I was reminded of one question. It's a silly tease peter i oh i do i was uh i got reminded of one question it's a silly question but also fun uh the critics you know you and you and kelly put some tiktok videos out there

everyone you know they love our dancing yeah uh yeah uh let's go baby hannah hannah hannah hannah brown and tyler hanging out and they call themselves a quarantine crew and somehow people decided that they invented tiktok and no one could like do tiktoks did that annoy you in terms of people being like kelly and peter are trying to be the quarantine crew too or like what was up with that i don't like are we not allowed to do tiktoks because they're doing it like they they do freaking awesome ones like were you trying to copy them and be the crew or or you guys were just like fucking around? No, not at all.

Not at all. We were just having a good time and I hadn't gotten on TikTok yet. So I finally like decided to give in. I too just started doing TikTok because of Corona, Peter. Oh, hell yeah. I think all of us did. Yeah. So I freaking love dancing.

I know I am extremely cringy, but guess what? I'm never going to stop because I freaking love it. And we just been having a good time. So. And you like magic. Oh, I got some more tricks up my sleeve. Don't worry. Those are still coming. I have one last question. I just want to know what went down when you first met Kelly? Because it seems like it might've been more than just like a quick hello. Rochelle wants to know if you fucked. No, no, it's not what I'm asking.

In the very, very beginning. In the hotel when you ran into her. No, I 100% honest to God, we met, I was walking out. I had been at my 10 year high school reunion. I was with my friends. I was ordering an Uber on my phone because we were, this was like at 1am.

We were going to go to Denny's to get some late night and we were walking through the lobby and I see this girl come with my peripheral vision and come up to me and says, I need to talk to you. I was like, whoa, what's this about? And she goes, you're never going to believe this. I was like, what is this? And it was so funny because my buddy still gives me crap because my buddy was like kind of like hitting on her.

And she saw me and then she totally like just abandoned him and like left and came over to me. Oh, shit. And it's just kind of funny. But anyway, so we started talking and she tells me that she had just gone to producer weekend and she was actually there for her one of her best friends weddings. And it was in Westlake or close to Westlake where i live we end up just like hitting it off we go back to the bar just get a drink hang out totally vibe um they close up then we go to the hallway okay yeah go

to the hallway um she had a couple friends that were still with her um we had a boom box like a portable boom box we started playing kygo in the hallway and just dancing. And like, that's when we did that little swing dance thing that we did the first night with the limo entrances where I was like, let's pick up where we left off. So we did that. Just had a great time. We were doing yoga because one of our friends had a yoga mat and started doing yoga just randomly, but it was just having a blast. And then it got late. We decided we're going to go our separate ways. We kind of walked back to the lobby. She's going to go to the left of the elevators and I'm going to leave. And I remember just being like, it's not smart to get a number. Don't do it. Let's

see what happens. If fate would have it happen, you're going to see her again. And I gave her a hug goodbye. I didn't get anything. Such a rule follower. I know, too much, right? Didn't get anything. I swear to God, not her phone number, no kiss whatsoever. Um, first time I kissed her was on the, on the steps in front of the door. Um, that first night at the mansion. But, um, my buddy who, who had talked to her originally ended up getting her Instagram before I guess she went private and like got pictures and was like, this is her. Right. And I got like four pictures that he sent me. I'm like, that's her. I was like, hell yeah. But I never like followed her on Instagram or anything. So I couldn't see her profile because it was private.

And then, yeah, she showed up that first night and the rest is history. I swear. I promise you. I believe you. I believe you. Why does your brother think you're so obsessed with line dancing? I mean, I loved how like on the family visit, he's like, you don't line dance. There's no way this is going to work.

Or she doesn't line dance or I don't know, whatever. I don't know. I do love the line dance. That I'm not going to lie. I'm not going to try to like toot my own horn a little bit too much, but I can really line dance. So I'll put it in the video. I believe it.

Your brother was like, that was the reason why you and Madison wouldn't work out in your brother's eyes. I can. Yeah. I'll post some of those on TikTok and see what people say. But yeah, it was fun. Did Madison, when you guys were breaking up, bring up the line dancing line? No.

No, she didn't. Honestly, I don't know why Jack said that. What does that have to do with anything? But yeah, I don't know. No, Jack's the best. Jack killed it. I thought your brother was great he was it's our triplet we got to get a picture all three of us i'm down whenever whenever whenever

allowed to hang in person um all right man well i think we've covered it all i think uh i appreciate you again being so honest and and sharing your point view. And I'm glad that you're saying your point of view, because it's not like your story, your truth, it's just like your perception of the situation. And all of this is people want to know what your what things happen from your eyes and what it was like. And a lot of people have made a lot of assumptions and questions. And it's, it's nice to be able to finally finally finally hear that from you and uh you're not a perfect guy but you are honest and you are authentic and uh i think uh i certainly hope people uh know that about you and um maybe now is not the best time for you to settle down and get engaged

but you know what um we have to go through these experiences. I'm a lot older than you. I'm still single. So, you know, what the fuck? You know what I'm saying? So who knows? But I do appreciate you taking the time, Peter. I know it's not very easy. I know this experience has not been always super fun, but you have handled it with grace. And I know grace is something that's pretty important to you. And I think that shows with how you have handled it. And, and for anyone who is a critic of Peter, and I know I've been a player, I just, I I'm stressing this because I think there's certain attributes that sometimes do get lost as Peter mentioned. And I think sometimes it's important to look at those things and that, that aren't always in our faces and some of the obvious things that we like

to compliment. And I hope that makes sense. So appreciate that, man. Peter, thanks so much. I really appreciate it. Thanks, guys, for listening on this Tuesday. I know we don't usually drop on a Tuesday. Don't be afraid to check out our Ask Nicks if you haven't checked it out already.

I think you will enjoy it. We talk a lot about relationships and lives and people are very vulnerable with their stories. So give us a listen if you are tuning in for the first time to check Peter out, which I'm sure you are. And as always, we will see you next time.