The Viall Files - E130 LTYH Finale Recap with Kaitlyn Bristowe

Episode Date: May 19, 2020

Today Kaitlyn Bristowe joins Nick to recap the anticipated Listen to Your Heart finale episode. But first, they talk about Kaitlyn's new song "If I'm Being Honest," how she came about writing the song, and the vulnerability that goes along with releasing something personal. Then, they wrap up the LTYH finale and season. Who's musical chemistry was palpable (and who's clearly wasn't?) Who's talent do they think will go beyond the show? And what does it mean to see someone's soul, Trevor??  Be sure to subscribe so you never miss an episode!  THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSOR: BETTER HELP: betterhelp.com/viall See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

what's going on everybody happy tuesday or monday night whenever you're getting to this episode or maybe it's wednesday or thursday welcome to another episode of the vile files listen to your heart recap as well as uh talking to uh country music pop stars uh caitlin bristow joins me today to help break down listen to your heart as well as uh talk about her new hit single if i'm being honest uh very excited for for caitlin and her success and it was uh uh very cool to talk to her about uh you know, how long she's been working on this song, what the experience been like, etc, etc. So fun conversation, as always with Caitlin, as well as kind of talking about just, you know, all things Bachelor. So I certainly hope you enjoy listening to the upcoming episode. I do have some sad news to share with you.

Rochelle has moved on from the podcast of Iowa Files. And it is definitely a big bummer, but we wish her a ton of success in the future. And she wasn't able to say goodbye on this episode, but we will certainly have her back down the road to see what she's up to and maybe help us recap an episode or two of The Bachelor. And so just want to say thanks to Rochelle for all she's done for The Vile Files. She was with us from the start. She has put a lot of work on this show, a lot of creative aspects and ideas that you see and listen to and things that you enjoy from the show have come from Rochelle.

So she will be missed. We wish her a ton of success going forward on her comedy career, on her acting career. She's doing a lot of great things and excited to see what she has coming down the pipeline. So just want to say a big thank you to Rochelle for producing and helping produce this podcast for the past year and a half. And we wish her the best. And we are sad to see her go. So if you follow Rochelle, give her a nice shout out on social. And yeah, it's a bummer, but we are happy to see her move on and wish her nothing but the best. Tomorrow, we will have a new producer. Excited to introduce you to her and be sure to check us out tomorrow for a fantastic episode with Laura Morano, a very

talented musician, singer, actor, actress. I don't know what the proper thing to say is these days, but she joins us and we have a fantastic conversation. I think you will really enjoy it. So be sure to check us out tomorrow, Wednesday, that is, depending on when you're listening to this, for the Laura Murano episode. I think I've covered it all. Don't forget to send your questions at asknick at castmedia.com, cast with a K for Ask Nick episodes. If you are tuning in to listen to your favorite Kate and

Bristow, be sure to check us out on Mondays for Ask Nick episodes. We give some great relationship advice. Well, actually, we give some relationship advice. I don't know if it's great, but people share their stories. It's very intimate. And I think we all learn a lot about relationships and love and life. And I think you will really enjoy it. So other than that, get ready for a great episode with Caitlin Bristow. And I think that's about it.

What's going on, Caitlin? Oh, just jumping right into it. Hi. I had a little moment this morning because i forget we're in different time zones and i put on the camera at 11 and i was like oh my gosh he probably meant 11 pacific time because he wouldn't get up at 9 a.m to podcast well i would uh and i thought because i thought well she's on central time, so she probably doesn't want to do it in the afternoon. So that's why.

I mean, Sundays are my day of doing absolutely nothing. Yeah, I didn't want to ruin that. Oh, thank you. I just don't want you to have your afternoon to do nothing. Because nothing is something to do. I agree. It's called self-care. Yeah.

It's like staring at the wall and feeling like not not judging yourself for it i would judge myself for that though staring at the wall would you never just never just zoned out i mean yeah but then i would judge myself if i was just staring at a wall i'd be like what's happening in your life caitlin that you need to be staring at a wall right now what's happening in your life, Caitlin, that you need to be staring at a wall right now. What is happening in your life, pop star? Ah! But so Jason said to me the other day, he's like, am I dating a pop star? I was like, no, you're dating a one-hit wonder.

I'm not sure where it's gonna go from here. That's pretty, it's pretty, it's pretty cool. I was watching the finale of Listen to Your Heart and then, you know, as always, they're gonna like introduce the finale of Listen to Your Heart. And then, you know, as always, they're going to like introduce the city of Nashville and they'll remind you of all the legendary couples. I love how you, you know, in your classic Caitlin Bristow kind of comedy interjected like,

well, you know, Caitlin and Jason. I'm assuming you were working on this song when you were filming the finale of Listen to Your Heart, yes? I was working on this song almost two years ago. Okay. But I was kind of like practicing and stuff. But it's so funny because, yeah, who was it? Rita Wilson.

She was like, you know, Johnny and June and like saying all these like iconic. And then when I was watching it, I kind of cringed because I was like, Caitlin and Jason. And obviously that's my humor. And I was like, oh, God, get over yourself, Caitlin. It came off just fine. I don't think. I mean, the fact that you dropped a song a few days ago was good time. And listen, like good for you.

It's a good song. It is. Thank you. I'm not I'm not even trying to be nice i think uh and just so you know like you know as as everyone does people text you know uh each other and it's kind of like did you hear kate and song they're like it's pretty good i'm like i know super fucking annoying uh no i think everyone i think everyone uh i think the it's unanimous that it's pretty damn good. Everyone seems to like it.

It's not like, and you were texting me the night before, you know, we're talking about something else. And you were saying, I'm dropping this song. I'm really nervous. And, you know, this is before you sent it to me to listen to. And I was nervous for you in the sense that, like I said to you, it's just like, I know very little about music and the music industry, except that it seems like it's a very, it's, it's very hard to break into.

The critics are that much harder, even fans. Right. In the sense that like so many, there's so many talented people out there. Right. And even if you're not like for, for you, like a lot of people might and even if you're not like for for you

like a lot of people might not even know you can sing and people will put out music and people want to dislike it i think their first intention their first reaction is what they're doing what they're putting out a song they think they can do this and they're looking like when they turn it on they're looking to like nitpick they're looking to like criticize they turn it on, they're looking to like nitpick. They're looking to like criticize. And so when you listen to a song and you like it, you're like, oh, fuck, damn, this is pretty damn good. Like, it's really hard to do. So I give you a lot of credit and congratulations on that because, yeah, I think it's one of

the hardest things to break into. Thank you. Yeah, I was so terrified. It was like, I can't think of another time I've been that nervous for anything. And I don't get too nervous for much. I get more excited. And this one, I was nervous in like a way where I was like, this is going to flop. I'm going to look like an idiot. And because of that same thing you're saying, like, I'm in Nashville. It's like the most talented city for singers, songwriters, musicians. talented city for singer-songwriters, musicians. And I always say that people ask why I was so nervous. And I keep saying, like, we all do it on Instagram. We compare ourselves to other people and how much better their lives look than ours. It's the same thing.

I'm like, I'm in Nashville. And who do I think I am? Like Carrie Underwood coming off a reality show and dropping like a song. And I'm nowhere near Carrie Underwood's like vocal talent. Carrie Underwood got her start on a reality TV show. I know, but she's the only one that can like, she was so legit. And I kept comparing myself to her voice being like,

well, I don't have a Carrie Underwood voice. So who am I to release a song? And then obviously I sat on the song for two years, almost two years. So I'm like, you know what? The time that we're in right now, isolation has taught me like timing is so precious. And like, I would regret. So I'm like, you know what, the time that we're in right now, isolation has taught me like, timing is so precious. And and like, I would regret it if I never did this. So and the lyrics are relatable to people right now.

How long ago did you record this? I recorded it the day that the news came out that Sean and I broke up. And it was so hard because my dad was in town to like be there for me. And I woke up in the morning knowing I had to go record the song that I had booked so far in advance because, you know, musicians and the producers and stuff are so busy. And knowing that that news was dropping, like everyone was going to know and people were my phone was going to be blowing up and I had to get up out of bed that morning my dad was like we can do this I'll be there for you like I'll go

with you to the recording studio and like my dad is like the most precious human being on the planet where he just like wants me to feel all my feelings he's like you can cry you can laugh we'll all be there together and so that's what I did. I just went to the studio and I had so much fun and I cried and I was so emotional. And I feel like that helped with recording the song because I was so vulnerable in that moment of singing those lyrics. Yeah. Did you write it on your own? I mean, obviously when you listen to the lyrics, it has a lot of Kate and Bristow in it, right? So it's obviously coming from, like you, like it's like, yeah,

you're telling your story. Like you. Yeah, it's definitely, I co-wrote. So I mean, I technically wrote it, but with, I can't do that on my own. I will never claim to be that talented because that's the joy, that's the beauty of living in a city like Nashville. I made so many friends with singers and songwriters

that they're like, well, why don't, just come hang out and we'll write. And I'm like, I have no business being in a city like Nashville, I made so many friends with singers and songwriters that they're like, well, just come hang out and we'll write. And I'm like, I have no business being in a, you know, songwriting session, because I've never wrote a song before. But I'm really good at telling a story or saying how I feel and putting ideas out there. And so that's what I did. I went and sat with two friends. And we just kind of talked about how I was feeling and I actually contributed to the song way more than I thought I was going to. I think I underestimated myself and I went in there and I had so much input. So obviously the professionals are able to put it into a song format. But yeah, definitely. I'm definitely proud of how much I wrote the song.

Like I said, it clearly has the KB story behind it. Again, as far as the song, how to write a song, and the things that make a song catchy and sound good, obviously I don't think there's any shame in suggesting that you need help. Some of the biggest stars in the world, I mean, literally, they all have songwriters, even if they write their own songs. Yeah, yeah.

There's producers and writers that, you know, help it. So there's certainly nothing wrong with that. How is the, I mean, I know the reaction's been positive, but how has it been? Like, who have you heard from? Have you been surprised? Any big surprises of who reached out and and gave feedback or their you know opinions on your song um i mean the one thing jason asked me the other

day like who is who has reached out that has meant the most to you um and obviously like friends and family of course but it's people that are actual musicians who have reached out and said like wow great job like carly pierce who's the most insane singer in nashville i'm obsessed with her voice and she like commented heart eyes on the song and i was like or like brett kissel who's a canadian country star and we're in his music video and he's a dear friend he was like uh like let's collaborate or like what can we do and he was like i'm really impressed with the song and like there's been some you know labels out there that have reached out already just to like have initial conversations not like

yeah no uh no no music labels reached out to me caitlin we'll drop a song we'll see what happens yeah that that'll be something no it's like i mean i mean i'm obviously joking but like when it comes out it's just like it's super annoying that you're like i'm i'm good at the dumbest things like painting bob ross paintings and roller skating and ironing like but that works for you and what i saw that like when the hell did you learn how to roller skate like that i grew i mean i roller skated like every saturday as a kid growing up in wisconsin that i was like that was a hidden talent that you dropped on everybody i was like what where did that come from yeah there's no uh um no i haven't been reached out by the uh roller skating producers of the world

you're not gonna be in any roller derbies anytime soon? You know, that's the dream. But no, listen, I'm going to be honest. There's always that question of, you know, what's one talent that you don't have that you wish you could have? And I've always said to be able to sing. And I've even fantasized about the idea of having musical talent, being able to sing sing and literally do what you did. Like this idea that I could have this like secret talent of singing that would write a song and that would just drop it on my Instagram. Like, hey, surprise, I'm a musical genius. Like, and I wouldn't be like, oh, like you literally did that. And it's so fucking annoying.

wouldn't be like oh like you literally did that and it's so fucking annoying i i even found like that was part of my fear of doing that and releasing it i was like this is this might be annoying to some people i mean like it's awesome and i'm really proud of you and it's super awesome and i think it's great but like the the jealous bone in my body was really throbbing well we'll find something for you to release and get signed on. It's going to be something dumb, but it'll be fun. Better Help. Well, people, you know about Better Help. We've talked a lot about it on this podcast.

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So if you're ever wondering or considered it, now is a great time. So like I said, I want you to start living a happier life today. And as a listener of The Vile Files, you'll get 10% off your first month by visiting betterhelp.com slash V-I-A-L-L. Join over 800,000 people taking charge of their mental health. Again, that's betterhelp, H E L P.com slash V I A L L. Natural habits. Well, people, I know we are staying inside a little bit more now due to the pandemic we are facing and always important to have clean, healthy indoor air and you want to smell good. And diffusing essential oils are a great way of doing that. Natural Habits are essential oil blends that are perfectly and strategically designed to

have great smells and have medicinal benefits like our release blend that helps you relax and calm down and help you sleep better at night. Our center blend that helps with headaches. We have great feedback from our customers on its ability to help prevent the start of a headache and help relieve them. And so they're just safer ways to, you know, if you're trying to like wean off taking ibuprofen for headaches, always a great option to try essential oils. Also just a much healthier option than, you know, burning candles or spraying Febreze or plugins, all those toxic chemicals.

So try out essential oils you haven't, nhoils.com, nhoils.com. And how about we'll do code KB for Caitlin, our guest today, code KB, letter K, letter B for 30% off your order, free shipping. Check us out at nhoils.com for usda organic certified essential oils i do have to ask you mentioned uh people reaching out you mentioned you recorded right after uh you and sean broke up had did you hear from sean did he send you any congratulatory like hey proud of you nice job text anything nothing no um no i didn't expect him to um it's so funny because he did actually reach out not to me but to um one of my friends asking for a guitar back that we bought together about five years ago and i was like i know like i'm just like trying to like start learning the

guitar whatever so so he did reach out about that and I said so I just reached out to him and I said hey um yeah you can come get your guitar like whenever and he said thanks I appreciate it whatever not a big deal and then you know it was absolutely devastating when Tucker his dog died because I loved that dog so hard but I was obviously devastated for him because I know that was his absolute best friend like i was always worried about that day when that happened and of course i reached out and said you know like so sorry about tucker you gave him such a good life are you okay but i still haven't heard from him since that like he has a robot on to you no the dog no i mean i you know like everyone grieves differently and i totally understand that because

honestly if i put myself in that position i would probably not want to talk to anybody especially my ex especially my ex so i'm not gonna hold it against him but um that's that's yeah that's kind of the only interaction we've had that's still a miss on sean's part time at least can you know right you could like how hard would have been been to be like, hey, congrats. Really neat what you did. But, you know. I know. I'll just say it.

You don't have to comment. I'll just say, like, he could have been a little bit more gracious. You know, it's fine. You know what? Maybe he listens to my podcast and he will take some, you know, maybe he'll take this, right? You know, Sean, if you're out there, feel free to congratulate Caitlin on her success. success no because now it's forced now it's no i know listen he doesn't listen to my podcast if there's anything i'm sure of in this world is that sean does not listen to this podcast right uh are you so are you like you said you worked on the song for two years yeah i. I mean, do you have other things you've been working on

or is it like this has been the focus and now you're like, oh shit, it turns out people like it. Now I'm even more motivated to keep writing or sometimes again, not with music, but when I'm creating other things, I'll be so invested and the idea of doing it again does seem like a bit, it's like, how could I do this again? So where are you in kind of next steps in your music career?

Yeah, that's kind of how I'm feeling. I do have a couple other songs already recorded, but again, they were from quite a while ago that I'm like, are they dated? Like, do I need to redo them? There's one song that I really love about Whiskey that I wrote that I'm like, it's catchy but I feel like I want to like the production needs to be a little bit um up to date or something I don't know so I'll probably release that one and then yeah I

kind of got I I thought I was going to release it and be like oh that's a fun thing to do like release music and have people be like oh talk about her song and everybody can relate to it in this time and then when I saw the feedback I was kind of like exactly what you said. I got motivated again to be like, oh, well, I should probably write more and release more music. But then that little negative voice in my head goes, leave it at a one hit wonder because everybody loved it so much. Then after that, that's when the people are going to be hard on you because they'll be comparing it to that song. And also, you know, like the hype of me putting out a song is probably what got me on the top charts is because people are just curious. Like you said,

they wanted to not like it or like hear what I sounded like. And now I'm just being negative. Listen, there's definitely some of that, but that doesn't matter. It's still... This is just me making excuses again to not yeah it's still a big deal that it reached number one and whether it was people just doing out of curiosity and certainly because it was new fine it doesn't matter it was still an incredible accomplishment and yes listen uh the best artists in the world um release hits and they release stinkers you know that happens I'm the same way when Taylor Swift

releases music like I always want to critique and then I'm like who am I to be doing that and I always end up loving her catchy songs anyways so that's part of being a fan but also yeah you don't even have to record

you don't have to release anything you record I mean that's true are all your songs going to be about alcohol but if you think about it what country song does not talk about I was gonna say a true country fashion I mean like it's like my way to it's like finally I won't be judged for talking about drinking all the time if I put it out into country music uh i was uh i made that count i'm should i do a roller skating music video to your song and like okay but i can't believe you just thought of that now if i do will you post it on your instagram yes it has to be good though because if there's one thing i'm good at it's making roller skating music videos wait only if you're wearing a scrunchie too i probably i don't like i cut

my hair yeah you put it on a on your wrist no i'll you know what i i have some creative ideas of ideas flowing in my head okay um we'll see if i bust it out okay so anyways uh yeah so we should we should we um should we uh get into the finale of listen to your heart take two yes uh now now that we have both a bachelor expert and a uh a music star oh before we do, I have one question. What's a bop? Oh my gosh, you're like my mom. My mom had to ask me what a bop was. And I was like, I don't really know an answer to that. I just know if somebody likes a catchy song, ooh, that's a bop.

I picked up on that. But people are like, oh, Caitlin's song's the bop of the summer. I'm like, okay, I get that it's supposed to be a big hit. But does it stand for something? Where did it come from? Do you not know i i don't know i saw it on um saw it on urban dictionary and sent a screenshot of it to my mom but it said something like it was very simple like when i think it's like if you like to bop to a song like you're bopping i make sense yeah i think that's so funny that you didn't my mom my mom did the same thing she was like what's

a bop and then I like sent her a screenshot of the definition and then like she tried to reuse it in like a conversation later and she was like oh yeah totally that song's bopping and I was like no no no no your mom's trying to get all the time now hey you gotta feel good that people are learning the meaning of a bop as a result of your song there you go i mean at least at least your mother and i yeah just you too i think um all right so listen to your heart what are your what are your thoughts on on this is a new show this season where are you at i i hate to say this because i just don't like when shows have to be about drama to get ratings, but I just find it too friendly.

It's like everybody is so friendly and nice and happy and there's no like, oh, what's going to happen? It's like everybody's rooting for each other and it's like I want to love that. But also when it comes to Bachelor, I think what we like to watch about that show is a little drama. Yeah, you're totally right. And we got a little bit with Brandon and Julia and Natasha, a little bit. But I think that's kind of the hard part is you're introducing music to the show.

And so there's clearly a focus on music. There's always going to be a focus on love. And so it's like, you know, it's tough, as Chris said when he came on and recapped this with us. I mean, it's hard to make a new show. The producers are, you know, they came up with this idea. They're thinking of ideas on the fly. It'll be interesting. Good job with it.

Yeah, no, it's a great, I enjoyed it. It'll be interesting job with it yeah no it's a great yeah i i enjoyed it uh it'll be interesting you know obviously and i don't know how like if the ratings perform relative to the other bachelor shows i don't know you know with the times that we're in and people are streaming more than watching network television i'll be curious to see how the you know the executives over at warn Brothers and ABC, like measure the success. And will there be like, there was a lot of references towards the end of this episode of Chris saying,

you know, the first ever season one, you know, implying that there's going to be more. I'll be curious if there is. And just like, listen, you know, Paradise One was a hit, but it wasn't what it was like season two and it really hit its stride season three because even the producers are just kind of like all right we learned from like things we did fans with things fans loved things fans didn't love it'll be

interesting to see if they get another chance to kind of build on what they did season one yeah because they i mean like any show you need to work out the kinks and see what people like and don't like and i i thought it was such a good concept because obviously people love american idol and people love the bachelor and you're just combining those two and i just get super uncomfortable when people like haven't really met and they're trying to find a connection and then they have to like sing to each other i i'm like i get like the second hand heebie jeebies for it it just makes me uncomfortable yeah well it was just always kind of funny i'm like i'm not a music guy right and then even the people on the show uh were just like yeah i've never like been in a relationship with someone i've performed before but in bachelor world like, you, you can't make music unless you're in love.

Right. It was like, I'm like, I think he can, you know, like Rudy, Rudy and Matt are a perfect example of, uh,

that, that was the one bummer. Uh, I think for me, this episode is that, you know, Rudy and Matt, you know,

the first 20 minutes or so of the, the episode was the breakup of Rudy and Matt, the first 20 minutes or so of the episode was the breakup of Rudy and Matt. Because it was like, oh, we don't get to see them perform because they were, they seem to be the most, in terms of combination of musically gifted

and then having the stage presence, they were definitely the most talented. Chris and Brie, I think musically are probably just as talented this is coming from someone who doesn't know music but at the same time like the way rudy especially rudy she has such a strong stage presence uh it was a bummer not to see them perform because uh i i have surprisingly enjoyed the performances more than I thought I would. Same. I was so bummed.

I was like, just fake it. Like, we want to see you perform. And I thought it was so cute that Matt was like, you know, I could act in love with her and we could go on and perform, but he obviously was not feeling it enough to do so. But like their chemistry on stage was so fire and off, it obviously wasn't there but

like you said when i'm watching chris and brie like they're very just like calm on stage and like not a lot of energy but their voices are so insane that you're like you're into it but rudy like she just pours her heart and soul into it when she's saying you feel it and i don't know it just it sucks that i was like can't you just be in love i interviewed matt on my podcast and i was like couldn't you can't you just love her please because we want to see you guys this was a classic case of i i will say this this uh show has i guess as much maybe maybe it always, it feels a little bit more in terms of, of it kind of demonstrated real life a lot in terms of relationships. And what I mean by that is like, look at Rudy and Matt, like this was a classic case of, you know, every time Matt was

like, I have so much respect for her. I care about her, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. And, you know, this came to a head with the introduction of the fantasy suite was Matt didn't want to have sex with Rudy. Right. He didn't feel the physical connection, right? The classic friend zone. I mean, when Matt was talking about Rudy, it reminded me of all the times I've met women in my life where I became good friends with them and they were great and I loved hanging

out with them and I loved talking to them and I just I just wasn't physically it didn't have it lacked the physical connection right and so you know the the kind of it's always interesting especially in like relationships I don't know what your thoughts on are on this is that there's always this double standard we've we've talked about double standards when especially when it comes to sex with men and women right um on so many things like women can get slut shamed and things like that. At the same time, it's always interesting because there's always this expectation that guys are always into having sex. We're always like, we're always up for it. Like we will fuck anything, anything, you know, like, and what, you know, that's not always true. And there are guys,

a lot of guys out there and I can relate. And Matt one of them what was this like i like listen i she likes me i can tell she likes me i'm not gonna go there i'm not gonna like cross that physical line because like that's gonna i don't want to do that and i it's weird because have you has that ever happened to you and like without getting into detail like i feel like when women when a guy gets rejected for having sex, he's like, yeah, whatever. I'm shooting my shot. Guys get rejected for sex all the time. But I feel like women feel, because of the social standard of guys will sleep with anything,

if they feel like a guy doesn't want to sleep with them, it feels like a bigger rejection. Does that make sense? I think women are just a little bit more like emotionally attached when it comes to being physical sure for totally yeah i just think like i think there's always like this expectation i mean even when i was in relationships it was this like when i wanted to have sex you know they would often be like i don't want to have sex tonight i was like okay you know and then if once in a while they're like oh let's have sex and i'm like i'm tired they're like what me you don't want to have what no like this there's no you know i think it's i think it's

the emotional part of it that's what i think coming from a woman um but what who's to say that why couldn't rudy and matt go there and just like hang out? I don't get it. Why does that mean that has to be physical? I had a couple of those thoughts this episode as well. Same with Bree and Chris. Yeah. It was like, you know, like, but then a couple of things.

One, obviously there's the show element, right? I think that I'm sure there were conversations. I've been like, hey, man, like if you're not going to do, you i don't think you know just so you know like producers are not like hey are you gonna fuck or not because otherwise go home like that's not that's not happening but you also have to keep in mind that there are like these all these people are new right you know especially matt you know he's heard the fantasy suite there's an implication of sex everyone's heard about the rain the windmill you know now and i my guess is matt was just like i don't want to go there i don't want to i don't want people to think we had sex yeah

i totally get it i totally understand um matt matt went a little over like i mean i get he was he meant well but when he's just like you have no idea how much i care about you. And I know you don't want to hear it. It's just like, you don't need to say it, man. Because he probably, remember the other episode where he didn't say anything. And he was just like, she dropped the L-bomb. And he just said nothing. And everyone's like, dude, say something. Now he was going too far the other way where he's like, well, I'm just going to say everything

I'm thinking so I don't sit here like a silent idiot he said thanks for speaking your truth yeah he said thanks for speaking your truth and it was very courageous of her ouch it's so funny when he was uh on my podcast i made him do a confession and after he was done i was like thank you for sharing that was very courageous of you thank you for speaking your truth he was like damn it did he catch oh he caught up on that oh yeah i've grown to really like like matt um yeah he's awesome i wasn't sure about him at first but he seems he seems pretty uh level-headed and earnest and seems like a pretty stand-up guy and really talented musically uh yeah he is i've enjoyed watching him. But for all the guys out there, sometimes you don't need to go overboard.

Where it's just like, you can... You never know. I really... Oh, when people in breakups are just like... The worst thing people can say in a breakup when they're trying to be nice is, I might regret this and of course i'll be thinking about this uh no so like actually you won't you know yeah and if you do it doesn't

really matter at this point it doesn't you know it's funny because like i'm watching it but like you know going back to your season right classic breakup when when when you you pick sean you break up with me and everyone does like you think well I want the I wonder if they're regretting their choice I wonder if they're crossing my mind and you want to think about that but the reality is I am you know having been in that position later it's just like I'm sure you were just far more excited to just be in the relationship with you know what I'm saying like you just it just you weren't on the mind and i'm sure matt was just like probably glad once the breakup was over and rudy was done crying he was probably just happy that it was over like he that he got his truth he was more sad that the

world couldn't see her perform anymore which he kind of said like he was just so sad to take that away from her because she'll be out there oh yeah absolutely if she does it like she is she has one of my favorite voices i've ever heard no she was i mean listen to do the uh when you do the bradley cooper and lady gaga song you are absolutely set up for failure yes yes. Yes. I mean, right? That's what I was thinking too. I'm like, ooh, this, I don't care how good you are. This is like, you just don't go there.

And they absolutely nailed it. Yeah. It was so good. I keep going back and watching that one performance because I love it so much. I watched it twice, which is a lot for me. You didn't like fast forward or go make coffee during it? You actually watched it? which is a lot for me you didn't like fast forward or go make coffee during it

you actually watched no I did and I went back and I can't say that about all of them yeah I'm not I

you know Jamie and Trevor they did a like they were it was Jamie's best performance I mean she definitely to her credit

has gotten more and more confidence throughout this season yes and that has shown I love watching her come out of her shell and get more confident on stage yeah she's 21 my favorite part of the season has been jamie giving relationship advice so all the people breaking up oh yeah has she like she oh she also said she had four boyfriends before that has cheated on her i'm like you're 21 no i had four boyfriends well my god listen like to jamie and jamie's defense like it's always like i always say like when you're 21 you still feel old because you've never been 21 before that's so jamie jamie's a babe, right? I'm sure she had, you know, she had her eighth grade boyfriend.

She had her ninth grade boyfriend. You know, she was probably, you know, the hottie in high school. Her boyfriend was a senior, you know. So it's not that hard to believe that she had four boyfriends and four shitty. I don't know why I just said that. I've had like 80 boyfriends. Yeah. But yes, as we get older, we look back and we don't even think of those as actual relationships.

But in Jamie's mind, they're as real as anything. But it is, I mean, listen, it's sweet and it was funny, but she was just like, you know, Trevor and I were just so in love and I wish you could have what we have. But like, you know, it was just like, like you know it came from such a sincere place and her part she is such a little sweetheart but don't you think for 21 she is like pretty mature emotionally like for for her age don't you think i don't know i couldn't i couldn't say one way or the other i uh no i i don't know i'm not saying whether she is or isn't but in my experience um that's hard to the only way to really know that and we haven't really learned about jamie's

backstory other than she had a couple boyfriends in high school is i'm curious about you know like to to say that would show it's more showing um as you get older, like I'm sure you have, have you always been as open about your insecurities and your tribulations and the things that you haven't been good at or the mistakes you've made when you were younger? No, definitely not as much. Yeah. So, you know, Jamie's talked about being cheated on, sure. But you haven't, we haven't really heard whether whether Jamie really thinking through something logically and being like, okay, let's slow our...

And showing a little perspective. I don't know. Who knows? I'm not saying she isn't, but I can't... Right. We just don't see that. I see a lot of excitement from Jamie. I see a lot of optimism.

And that seems to track... A lot of cleavage. Yeah. That seems to track with someone in her age and that's totally fine it's yeah fine i i liked um their second performance wait i can't even remember what song they did the first one i remember well obviously i was there so i remember watching them and i didn't have anything to compare it to yet so i was like i don't know who's been on the show i don't know what the other singers were like up into this point i this they're the first people i saw and i remember being like oh my god she has

a great voice and she kind of took over like trevor and he was just kind of there and their second one i was like oh okay that was really good and then when chris and brie came in i was like oh they were incredible like their performance was electric they're that second song that they did and they had the energy and they were working the crowd and they were like in love i felt like that was good for what they usually are they're usually kind of dull on stage and their second one i was like there it is yeah did you did you so i think you kind of answered that question but being there live uh you felt a difference between brie and chris and trevor and jamie yeah watching it back i was like oh i didn't know like the beforehand stuff when they were like having this moment of like oh

something's different today um but i just felt like they were a little bit more ready and mature and in a better place even though jamie and trevor were still cute and happy and in love and whatever it just seemed like puppy love and they were like had so much to learn in their singing careers and then the other two seemed a little bit more like they're like ready to go jump on that tour bus um fun fact about how how is Tay Diggs in in person he was hilarious and then after I think it was after Andy's season uh he followed me on Twitter and then i realized he he follows like a hundred thousand people and i felt so but nevertheless i was like ah that was

my feeling when melissa joan hart followed me on twitter i was like oh my gosh sabrina the teenage witch like this is my moment and then i realized she follows everybody she's like that twitter system that like you know if that you follow them they follow you back yeah yeah yeah totally uh that happens a lot um but yeah i just remember in tating i was just i thought he was the coolest guy and i don't know i don't know maybe he really is though he's he is so funny and and just like like you know when you talk to somebody and you you think they're probably like like they don't care about me or they're just doing their own thing like he he genuinely was like asking us questions and like was curious about our life and like being in nashville he was really sweet actually so was jewel and rita they were so awesome do they wait they don't the tay doesn't live in nashville does he or either did any of

them live in nashville jewel used to but i think she also has a place in Colorado, but I think Jewel has a place in Nashville. Gotcha. Yeah. Do you know anything about, are they, do you know anything about the couples? Are they still together? I was actually wondering the same thing.

I don't know. I have no idea, but obviously, well, once Monday airs, I feel like we'll find out because they'll be able to like talk about it on instagram yeah um i mean does there any part of you think that jamie and trevor will last past a year i mean i want to believe they will but my gut tells me they won't because i get a tiny and i'm i shouldn't judge but i i judge i

have i have good intuition and i have little tiny red flags about trevor uh yeah i think everyone does and it's yeah doesn't make him a bad bad guy i think even the producers you know i text now and then they weren't saying he's a bad guy they They were just like, we're not sure about the guy. That doesn't mean he's a bad guy. There's something mysterious about him that I'm like, I don't know. You know what I think it is? He just doesn't like Jamie that much. But he likes her enough to convince himself in that world that he's into her.

Yeah. Right? But you just don't see the love that you see from like chris and brie and you don't see the love that you have from jamie who's just like over the moon about trevor right and he he does sincerely like jamie yeah that much more than say matt liked rudy where matt could be like hey i like her as a friend. I need to be really honest. I think the big question when it comes between the difference between Matt and Trevor is, you know, and he has the whole American Idol past.

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. That doesn't make him a bad guy either. But is he just, is he that much, is he just a little full of shit, you know, in terms of can he convince himself that he's really into jamie when he went deep down he even knows he's not i mean aren't we all a little full of shit sure i mean everyone is um i see what you're saying though but you know

what's interesting is when um we were being judges up there i asked asked Trevor and they didn't show this, but I asked him, I mean, you guys seem really blah, blah. And she seems in love. And I said, do you love her? And they didn't,

they took it out. And I don't even remember what he said. I think he said, yes, I'm in love with her. I'm falling in love with her or something. Well, there's a difference.

Did he, did, if he says he's falling in love with her, he definitely. I can't remember. And that's when they uh when they were airing it and i was watching i was like oh shoot they took that part out because i don't remember exactly what he said um probably he's falling in love with her yeah it probably my

here's my guess it it read especially after they watched it, it read like he doesn't love her at all. So they took it out. You know what? You're probably right. Because it's the finale. You need to like, you know. I also think I'd remember if he said, I love this girl.

Yeah, put it this way. He wasn't just like, you know, God, I can't, I couldn't love her enough. And I'm truly deeply emotionally attached to her. Yeah, no. And I always question people. And again, I don't think Trevor's, I don't know Trevor. And that world is a powerful world where you can get caught up in things.

But when people repeat platitudes, I start quite like when, how many times is Trevor gonna say how he's seen into Jamie's soul? First of all, he did say that a lot. I don't know what that means. Second of all,

I'm not sure. He really wanted to hit that point home. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. I think, you know, like when you say like really obscured things that are like meaningless,

it's just like, well, I saw to say something like, you know, that saying something about her soul is really deep so you like use that word yeah it sounds really good but at the same time means literally nothing right no one can really figure out what that means so like when he eventually breaks up with her and she's like but you saw into my soul and trevor's like for a

million dollars tell me what that means i would like to ask him that question what what does that mean yeah that's a great yeah actually I want him on just to ask him that question we you should have him on and just like don't ask anything else just have like this one segment on your podcast where it's called ask Trevor one question and then you just bring on and then just hang up yeah Trevor can I what does it mean to see someone's soul yeah he answers the question all right trevor thanks for your time it's been really great uh actually would that be totally dickish or i mean it would be funny if you if we're already setting it up this way and then you have him on another time and have like a good conversation with him uh maybe i'll throw him into like if i'll make some

calls after i get off the phone with you and see if he wants to let me ask him one question yeah i think that'd be hilarious and but don't tell him what the question is because no oh no you need to yeah he needs to be like thrown off like wait what does that mean and then i would love to hear his rambling explanation i'm sure he'll say it in a very well you know soft soft voice and with a half smile half smile just you know i'm just i don't know it's just when you um you know when you he'll probably use the word soul a lot to describe what it means which is always like a red flag when someone well just what it means is to really see deep into their soul yeah that's for sure what his answer you just say thanks bye yeah but listen i again very powerful world uh doesn't make him a

bad guy and no when they eventually break up it doesn't mean that he was totally full of shit yeah but how many times do you watch the show and every couple that comes out of any kind of bachelor show how how often do you make a bet of how long the last every time uh i mean people do for sure yeah i mean i i certainly i certainly made bets about you and sean and i guess i'll be honest way off way off listen i was a a bitter angry heartbroken little bitch you know and i was just like i'll never fucking last and i was like and i had all these reasons of why uh you guys a lot of people did. A lot of people said that. And I do feel like that's every season. And I'd say about six months.

You know, once, you know, it probably took me a month or two to just kind of get over the whole experience. And then I'd say about six months down the road, I was like, you know, actually, I think, you know, that's when you start like accepting, you know, it's just like, you know, you made the right decision, blah, blah, blah.

And then it was more like, actually, I think it made a lot of sense. And so that changed. But right after, I was certainly. Well, yeah, you go through different. I give them a week. Yeah, you go through different phases of grief. But yeah, I, yeah, no. And I, you know, even I don't know how long did i uh after vanessa and

i got together i was like yeah i'll give it you know you were doing it to yourself yeah i give us a week well i mean i don't know how it was for you and sean but you know that's a hard time for every bachelor couple and you have these, very bizarre and crazy fights, uh, usually related to the show and the things that happen. You're just like, I don't, how do you like,

it's a shitty foundation to start a relationship on. It just is. And every couple that comes out of it, we'll go through like one of the hardest times in any relationship. And it's, uh, you either come out of it or you don't. Uh,

totally. Uh, what, uh, you know, I mean, we just basically covered listen your heart any anything you want to cover any uh any more things we can talk about your music career uh i mean thank you

but i feel like we i feel like we covered it but i also um who was i talking to you on i can't remember where if it was on the podcast last time or where but we talked about if the season aired again i can't or maybe it was just chris harrison i was talking to you i can't remember but the fact that they're playing 10 seasons again how are they going to break it down into three hours are they going to show this is why i'm curious are they going to show like just like basically um try and wrap it up in three hours of what curious. Are they going to show like, just like basically try and wrap it up in three hours of what happened? Or are they going to show like never seen before footage?

Well, I don't know the answer to their question. I said to them, they absolutely should show never seen before footage. That's what I think. Because I've heard that it's more difficult to find old footage than you realize. Because as you, you know, and we've talked, I've talked about this there and you know, like they're filming hundreds of hours of footage and they might use 8% of that, right? Right.

Most of which is this like people talking about the lamest things, right? Yeah. They can't possibly hang on to all that inventory. So after a few years, they get rid of it, right? And so it sounds like there's a lot of things that are just, they don't have anymore. I didn't think about that. Yeah. But self, like there's some, I mean, I'm thinking about your season.

I'm thinking about my season. I'll just say this there are people who get protected uh yeah that have done some shit and i personally would you know would like to see that see the light of day um i know it'd be really compelling because i just watched um i can't remember what this show was called it's some documentary on netflix where they have like six different episodes in one season and this one was about um um like you remember jenny jones and like phil donahue and like maury povich yeah are you talking about that netflix doc about like, I'm watching. I watched it. It's awesome. Yeah. It's about the press and like, you know, the ratings.

I forgot what it's called, but I'm like four episodes in right now. It's really good. I watched one and it was about the Jenny Jones show and how they like humiliate people and all at the expense of, you know, people's emotions for ratings and all this stuff. And this guy ends up killing his best friend because he embarrassed him on national television. And this guy was just like triggered. Which is not great, but the show itself is.

Yeah. Yeah. No, it's terrible. But it's fascinating hearing. But where was it? Oh, yeah. So then I'm like, when I think about all the stuff they could show, producers could go back

and expose people. then I'm like, when I think about like all this stuff they could show, um, producers could go back and, you know, expose people. I'm like, I would worry about a lot of people's emotional and mental state going through all of that again. When you think it's past you. Uh, I guess there's that.

I don't think, you know, even the things I'm thinking about, I don't, I, as someone who's been through the ringer as you have as well wait I want to know what I want

to know what specifically you're thinking about well I mean listen there's stuff obviously I personally think Sean got a pretty favorable edit there's a there's you know I'm just whatever anyways and also like do I but but I,

I say this knowing that like, did Sean do anything like egregious or terrible? Of course not. Right. It's all within that silly little world of, of how, what they choose to emphasize or things they might say. I still think,

you know, he got a pretty favorable, I think things could have gone very differently for him. On my season, there was a, there was an epic battle between Vanessa and Rachel that didn't see the light of day because, well, Vanessa was my girl and,

and Rachel was the, and it was kind of like, I think there was a thought like, this isn't going to do anyone any good. And it would probably, it would probably not have, it would have been less good for Vanessa is my understanding. Yeah. Of they have to i'm not necessarily like but do i think i don't i wasn't there i didn't see it i'm actually curious about the fight uh i know don't you

wish they could just send us certain things that we could ask for be like oh could i see that and they could just send it over um i would personally i don't know if they're airing mine i think there's some discussion but like if if they did i would fucking love to see that fight yeah uh i heard it was epic i heard it was like really juicy and they were just like uh out of i mean i can only imagine those two personalities going at it oh and i guess they really did um and it was uh a real shame from a TV standpoint. I mean, I appreciate it because at the time they, they did me a favor and I think they did a Rachel, Rachel favor. And they certainly did Vanessa a favor by, you know, being like, you know what, we're just gonna, you know, and for again, for all the,

the heat that producers get, they, they do look out for, for us from time to time. Yeah. Yeah, they do. But there's, like, I'm trying to think, like, even if you think back onto my season, however, that's, like, five years ago, it's crazy what they were allowed to even get away with then where it's, like, so wrong in the times now. Broke Bachelor? What?

Yes. Broke, yeah. Yes, like, JJ and Clint, that whole thing. I'm like, that would not fly in 2020. Yeah. When they air your season, that's certainly, they will breeze right through that and be like, oh yeah, we know that joke we said. Yeah.

That's not funny anymore. A little tone deaf probably. Yeah. A lot. Yeah. It'll be interesting also like i'm sure like it will be fascinating you know we've talked about this and i'm sure you've addressed it uh you walked so hannah brown could run uh your people's fans reactions to uh you being progressive with your sexuality was treated far different than Hannah Brown was treated. And so people seeing that through a different lens, even myself, right?

Like when I showed up on your season, I was the villain from Andy's season. It was like, how did, you know? And so I'll be, because it was funny when I, I remember watching when I came on on other than like my hair i was pretty fine with my i was actually fine with my edit like i didn't like my edit on andy's season but i honestly thought i got a fair edit on your season it was just like if you didn't like me from the previous season there wasn't enough there to like completely change i mean i changed some

people's mind but it wasn't the 180 that you saw you're right so it will be different going back again i don't know what they show what they focus on or you know how much they cram in what they'll show and like you know how like some of us can get um like the screener so if we podcast we can you know have a little heads up i wonder if they'll let us see those beforehand. I think they probably will. I don't know. Actually, do we recap a recap? Yeah.

Yes, because it's so interesting. To take a whole season and cut it down to three hours, I just don't know how they're going to do it with telling a whole story, especially when I'm not with that person anymore. And some people aren't. And like Sean Lowe married with three kids. Like, are they going to,

you know, I don't know if it's going to be like a feel good thing or a like dramatic thing. I don't know. My understanding is it's intended to be a feel good thing or a like dramatic thing i don't know my understanding is it's intended to be a feel good thing um even like the villains from whatever respected season i think it's also different now too i forgot the girl's name who was the villain on sean lowe's season but you know for example tiara yeah but it's also different times.

Look at Corinne from my season was like the first, in a traditional sense, Corinne was the villain of my season. And she was also the star. You know what I'm saying? And people appreciate villains differently than they do now. Demi would have been the villain of Colton's season. And look at demi now you know it's this different um people's it's people view it different they view it in a different lens

so i don't think i definitely don't think the show's out to get anyone no and i think either you know never seen before footage again it's always there's only so much time that really can focus on something and half the time for example like when i was the villain in the anti-season it's like there's a build right nick strategic so every week it was just a reminder of these little things and there's this build i don't think they can build up what they're going to show is like these little fights and either way it's going to be fun to watch it'll be more like a i feel like a real housewives where it's just like no one's a villain everyone's this fucking crazy and it's funny and it's going to be fun to watch. It'll be more like, I feel like a real Housewives where it's just like, no one's a villain. Everyone's this fucking crazy.

And it's funny and it's great. And, you know, if someone has an amazing one-liner, we'll love that, right? Yeah. I honestly think like the Tiaras of the world, if they like show her, people will, instead of being like, oh, I hate that girl, like they would on Twitter,

they're going to be like rock star, you know? Totally. I think it'll be more like that. hate that girl like they would on twitter they're gonna be like rock star you know totally i think it'll be more like that um so that that will be uh it will be interesting but uh yeah it'll be kind of fun uh um the where are you guys yeah and it will be interesting like obviously you and sean vanessa and i are not together uh you know, I know they're airing Ben season, like Ben and Lauren are not together. I personally don't think there's anything wrong with like, you know, Vanessa and I are not together,

but do I think it's weird if they, I'm not ashamed of that story. Right. I'm not, it's not awkward for me to watch it back. You and Jason, for example example are in this great relationship like is it do you think is it i don't mean i know jason i talked about it a little bit on when he was on my podcast he doesn't seem the least bit bothered by the possibility i'm more bothered than he is what what what what scares you the most um you know what honestly it's it's not even

that it scares me it's just reliving um certain a certain relationship like i don't know it just to relive that it's just so hard for me because it was so different in that show to what it was and then to now that i'm like oh i just don't want to because it was so different in that show to what it was. And then to now that I'm like, Oh, I just don't want to go back there and be in that mindset. Do you think, uh,

and I'm just thinking out loud, but what do you mean? Like, I I'll speak for my, like for Vanessa and I, right? Like, uh,

in that world, I was head over heels for her. I was just like, I, I was, I was, you know, when I, when I teared up on our first one-on-one date, those were very real tears. And what those were was relief of like, thank God there's someone here that I'm falling for. Um, and again, we just weren't compatible, nothing against either of us. Um, but it wasn't like our relationship on the show was not what our relationship was as you said in real life and are you afraid of like people glorifying that

relationship now that it's over no because i think people have just seen and i've always been so open and honest on podcasts about things and how I feel. And like, I feel like everyone just sees how happy and content I am right now that they'll be like, and it was so long ago, like five years is a long time. I think people just find it entertaining and fun to watch. I just think I think so for myself, it was such and I know this sounds dramatic and people will never, never understand, but it was so hard what I went through. and people will never never understand but it was so hard what i went through and i felt like almost traumatized that i like i kind of blacked out a lot of that season because it was just so

much that i just am scared of all these feelings being like not not like feelings like oh i still have feelings but like just yeah you know like i don't know i don't know how to explain it. No, I mean, listen, I get it. Yeah. I haven't watched, you know, it's funny. Last night, literally last night, I got a text message from Alicia. You know Alicia. Alicia used to be the executive producer of the show. And she sent me pictures from Andy's season. Literally last night. I don't know if she was like reminiscing it was a picture of me and josh and markel and jj in a bath like messing around and then she sent me a picture of me and andy in the ocean on our fantasy suite date

like literally right after i told her i loved her and i looked at the picture and i was just like it definitely takes you back. Like not, not, I don't have feelings for Andy. Couldn't be more over that relationship. But like you look back and you're just like. It's overwhelming. It's overwhelming. Cause like it, boy, I remember that moment vividly.

You know, it was a really crazy day. And it was just like, it really, they were such intense. These, these, these experience were so intense for us. Yeah. It is such a crazy, like, I mean, it's a wild experience to go on that show. And to even just like, even when I went back for like the reunion for the bachelorettes, like walking into the mansion and smelling it, I was like so overwhelmed that I like lost my breath. into the mansion and smelling it, I was like so overwhelmed that I like lost my breath.

I have not been back to the mansion, Caitlin, and not been out to the pool and not thought every time. This is where Caitlin dumped me. I still wish you would have pushed me in the pool. I still kind of wish I did. I mean, I would have been a total, like, I wonder, think about that. In that moment, it would not have been good for me but i wonder if it would have gone down as a fun moment yes it would have oh god i just like like really gently like not aggressively right you don't weigh that much just a little finger

yeah just a little shoulder tap into the pool like i'll walk myself out that would have been that would have been fun uh caitlin it's always fun to talk to you thank you for uh recapping this episode with me uh tons of congratulations your way on the success of your single uh remind people where they can find it uh well it's anywhere that you can download music so Spotify Apple iTunes I don't know all the music things that you can go but it's also

on my link on my bio in my Instagram and yeah if I'm being honest if I'm being honest you know what I feel like you really set yourself up for when fans come up to you to like try to throw and be like can i can i be honest can i be honest

i love your song or or the dick person who's gonna be a can i be honest if i'm being honest i don't i know i like it though gets people talking it's a very relatable song it's a uh yeah i can see why it it has it definitely has a legitimate chance i think to be a bop and a song that people listen to on like you want right you want a song that you listen to over and over and you want a song that people listen to and sing out loud because it makes them like feel like they're able to express themselves and it's certainly uh i don't, I'm not, I'm one of those guys who looks at listens more to the melodies than the lyrics,

but like, because I know you, I actually tried to pay attention to the lyrics and I could see why, especially a lot of women would find this to be incredibly relatable. So I hope it, I hope it blows up and congratulations. It's pretty awesome. Excited to see what else you drop.

And yeah, thanks for coming on. Thank you for having me. Thanks for listening, guys. As always, don't forget to send your questions at asknick at castme.com. And if you haven't checked out our Ask Nick episodes on Mondays, give it a listen. We give some relationship advice

and people share their stories. It's a lot of fun. And check us out tomorrow for a wonderful episode with a very talented, also musician and talented actress, Laura Marano. Have a good day.