The Viall Files - E203 Watermark Your Nudes With Lala Milan

Episode Date: November 25, 2020

Lala Milan joins The Viall Files today and brings all of her energy and spirit with her. From working at Allstate Insurance to becoming a viral sensation we cover the journey that got Lala to where she is today, and where she is today is “getting Ivy Park delivered to her door honey!” Actress, comedian, and social media star are just a couple of things to describe Lala, after our conversation we would like to add real, authentic, true, and unapologetically herself. She opens up about how slowing down her relationship has actually made her relationship thrive and how women should not be ashamed to talk about their vaginas and bodies to their partners or other women. Ladies the same things happen to all of us, and Lala is here to drop the fire on all of it and you can catch more of it on her podcast The Salon. “I’m normalizing talking about womens vaginas.“ Please make sure to subscribe so you don’t miss an episode and as always send in your relationship questions to [e-mail] to be a part of our Monday episodes.  THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSORS: Plenty of Fish: Find the full list of 2021 Dating Trends on Plenty of Fish’s blog. The Latest Catch (blog.pof.com) and download Plenty Of Fish from the App Store or Google Play to sign up for a free membership today.  SkyLight Frames: http://www.skylightframes.com use code FILES to get $10 off your purchase.  Truff: http://www.truff.com use promo code VIALL for 10% off site-wide Axon Taser: http://www.taser.com use promo code VIALL for 15% off.  Hello Bello: http://www.hellobello.com/VIALL to get 25% off your diaper bundle order. Episode Socials:  @viallfiles @nickviall @lalamilan See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Knowledge is power, especially when it comes to dating, as you guys know, because you're constantly asking how to date better. Well, knowing what you do, maybe incorrectly, is beneficial. Key dating trends that my friends at Plenty of Fish have identified, talk blocking and wall doing. While talk blocking, you might ask what it is. I'll tell you. It's when you watch TikTok or maybe Instagram or Facebook, if that's your thing, all day long and then realize it's massively interfering with your dating life. We all do that. We spend too much time on social media. It's distracting and we can't focus on

and then improving ourselves and then becoming interesting people or paying attention to our dates because maybe we're on TikTok when we're dating. And then wall doing, obviously, stop doing wall doing. Stop posting group photos or pictures of your friends on dating apps.

They're not interested in who your friends are. They're superficial. They're vain. They want to know if you're hot. Let them know you're hot. You're hot. So find the full list of 2021 dating trends on Plenty of Fish's blog, the latest catch blog.pof.com and download Plenty of Fish from the Apple App Store or Google Play to sign up for your free membership today. You're crazy What is going on everybody? Welcome to another episode of The Vow Fowls

I'm your host Nick, joined by my producer Chrissy Hello How are you doing Chrissy? I'm good, I would have moved now by this time. Good thing we're recording this. Great. I love it. We'll just get right

to it. We have a fantastic episode for you. Lala Milan is our guest. I love Lala. She is talented, funny, hysterical, wonderful, a delight to conversation with. Actor, comedian, YouTuber. I really enjoy talking to her and talented funny hysterical wonderful a delight to conversation with comedian youtuber uh i really enjoy talking to her and uh i hope you enjoyed as much as uh i did talking to her you learned a lot about vagina hygiene in this episode heck yeah and what a delight it was not something you talk about every day i'm sure but glad but not enough not enough not enough

so uh thanks for thanks for that journey uh just remember it's uh black friday i'm sure as you know a lot of shopping options but hey if you uh like some biofile merch if you want some breakup books if you want some hoodies you want some masks you want you want some cute tops, sweatshirts, we're going to have a sale 20% off. Code Vile, V-I-A-L-L. We'll keep it simple. Vilefiles.com and get some merch for your favorite podcast with some clever sayings and some great things that when you walk down the street, your friends will be like, oh

my God, girl, that's so right. Oh my God, that mask. You're right. He's not that special. He's not that special, girl. Or not. Or dude, he's not that special. Bro.

Bro, he's not that special. So check it out. Other than that, thanks for listening. Subscribe, rate us five stars. We will see you back on Monday. Happy holidays. Happy Thanksgiving. Stay safe. Stay safe.

Stay smart. We love you. I know. I watched your Amazon wig video. Yes. Come on. Don't worry. This one is a pop on and pop off.

There's an Amazon. That's a wig? Yes, it's a wig. See, white boys always be gassing me up. You know? Like, yes, this is a whole wig and he just made me feel good. I love it. That let me know that it looks real honey

it looks really real and i thank you wow do you only wear wigs um i be wearing my real hair sometimes very seldom very seldom um yeah shampooing and just going out my hair is natural what they call natural so it's not like this texture at all it can be but with the wrong humidity in the air it looks like a enlarged tennis ball okay if you will i have frizzy curly hair well not maybe not it like it responded well to humanity. Yeah, it's a whole situation. Am I just stupid for not knowing? Are wigs pretty prevalent? No, you're not stupid for not knowing at all.

And yes, they're prevalent. I'm sure there's a lot of people who probably came in here who had a wig on that you didn't know. It looks marvelous. Thank you. That is such a compliment. Thank you. I'm like this. I'm looking. Well, hello, mom. It looks marvelous. Thank you. That is such a compliment. Thank you. I'm like this.

Well, hello, mom. I'm welcome. I'm looking hard at her hairline, and it just looks amazing. That's good. That's so good. Thank you. Yeah, it looks great.

Don't look too hard. You might see the net that they be talking about, but you know, otherwise we good. I don't see it. And honestly, like in movies, sometimes in movies, like if you have an actor, like an actor, like you you just know like a male actor who's bald or something and he has like a hairpiece and i'm like i fucking see that shit yeah nicole kidman you always call nicole

kidman always has like these hair pieces and you can always tell when she got a hair and that's hilarious why why how come in general like men deal with balding, right? And hair loss. And there's such a stigma around men wearing hair pieces and like not owning their hair loss. And women are wearing extensions and wigs and it's totally fine. I think that men just be doing it wrong. You know, they like to do Beijing, you know, which it just be blatantly obvious. Like they colored their face and hairline with permanent marker.

You know, if you do it right, you know, some people even do the surgeries where they go ahead and get their hair follicles put in correct places. Now that's, hey. They're making investments. bad yes but a hair piece is just like a toupee you know and it's it just looks crazy often now if you find somebody who do it right you in business yeah it doesn't look styled or anything like that it just looks like something that was slapped on yeah but as women if you were dating a man. No. And he had the same. I'd rather you be bald. He had the same.

Okay, that's what I'm. Yeah. Why? And he was just, his game was just as strong as yours. His wig game. If that were possible. It's not possible. But if it were possible.

But you know what though? There are men with fire man wigs you know they just be hard like that and that's unattractive because you want to rub your man's head and then you rub and it's like sandpaper that's not cool you know so i just i'd rather you be a manly man and go bald because you're still attractive just Just shave it. Just shave it. Yeah. I love me bald. I love bald. Love it. Yeah.

No, there's definitely a point where it's like just don't hang on. Personally, I like a full hairline. But when we're older, you know, hey, it's all right. Yeah. I just don't understand the double standard. There's double standards with a lot of stuff. Well, sure. I know. And that with a lot of stuff. Well, sure. I know. And that's just one of them.

Okay. Shoot. It just doesn't, like, short doesn't look as good as long wigs. Short wigs don't look as good as long wigs, I feel like. Like, a guy's not walking around in a bob. But maybe if he's walking around. A bob. Like, a bob.

But maybe if he's walking around like Jason Momoa in a wig like that, I can get behind that. My sister. By the way, thanks for coming, Lala. No problem. Thanks for having me. This is Lala. Welcome to the show. Oh, look, we haven't already started. We do an intro and we talk about our-

Oh, we good. Okay. It's fine. My sister used to date a guy and in his early 20s he lost all his hair and so he's very self-conscious about it like early 20s like he didn't eat any vegetables i'm pretty sure that was and he he like found this like they would like it was a whole thing it was expensive but like they found like like they would like cut his hair and hair and glued it to his head. Oh, my God.

So every four months, you have to go. But it looked very real. But it was short, too. But it was well done. My question is, why did they break up? Oh, he had problems. You got to. He didn't eat vegetables.

He didn't pay bills. And he was irresponsible. And he didn't eat vegetables at all. My sister's a holistic nutritionist. Oh, wow. Okay. Yeah. They just weren't meant.

Well, hey. Yeah. I just, I can't. I don't want to be at the hair salon while my man is at the hair salon too. You know? I'm in touch with that. The barber, yes. But the salon, mm-mm.

So when it comes to dating, are you like a traditional macho man um when you say macho man what you mean well i don't know so if we're going to say well i get it i agree with you i get it like i you know i just this is my thing i don't want to be like sitting next to my partner like with that the salon a masculine man sure i don't know yeah masculine but but you know we talk about toxic masculinity we talk about like traditional masculinity where are the lines where like if uh what what is okay if your man wants to do something maybe that's socially considered more less masculine or feminine like not at the hairdresser but you know manicures pedicures that's okay yeah i think um i think that's a rich man trait, you know?

And I think that's attractive, me personally. You know, I've noticed a whole bunch of golfers go get a manicure and stuff. And I'm like, oh, that's lit, you know? Okay. So you're on a dating app. You're talking to a guy. You're like, hey, babe, what's you doing tonight? And he's just like, I'm about to go get a pedicure and a manicure.

You're turned on. Or you're not i just appreciate it you appreciate it yeah like i don't look at it like uh-uh you better go get your nails not like that it's just like okay that's cool shoot mind if i come with you know you buying yeah like i'm down. Okay. This is great. Look, Shark Tank had a whole business on there for it. For hammer and nails. Yeah, it's called hammer and nails. Oh, that's cute. Yeah, Tom Melrose. That's cute. That's fire.

How long have you been in LA? I've been in LA for three years now. Oh, I'm longer than you. Five years. Yes. How do you like it? I absolutely love LA. Yes, it's amazing.

Did you always like it at first? Yes. Because for me, it at first? Because for me, it took me, it took a good year for me before I even came here. I loved it because every time I came, there were like so many people who I connected with. I was just doing the most craziest things. And I was like,

Oh, if I'm here, I know that's going to be happening on a regular. Then of course you move and you get comfortable. So none of it be happening, but it's what lures you in. But, yeah, it's fire. You came from Atlanta?

Yep. I came from Atlanta. I was in Atlanta for five years. And I was always like, I'm going to just stay. Because if they want me in LA, they'll fly me out. But that was a whole lot. Whoever was giving me an opportunity. You know, cast and directors.

Boy, don't be trying to dig for something that is not. I'm talking about the money. He's talking about who's they. Okay. They are the people with the money and opportunities. I have a skylight. I could take. I've been doing photography.

I've been taking pictures myself. You know, a selfie or a sky. And I just upload them. And it shows up my mom's skylight. She has it in her living room. I gave this as a gift. And that way I don't have to call my mom to tell her I love her now because I just send pictures of myself. I'm kidding about that.

I don't have to. I love talking to my mom. You know, you know, when you go home, you know, if you don't live at home and your mom has this outdated picture of you or the person you're dating that's annoying you've changed your hair you look better you don't look like that anymore no well now every day you can send them a new picture of yourself yeah new glam shot email it right to the frame and then like your mom wakes up and she's like oh my god that's right yesterday skylight frame is a photo frame you can update instantly by email from anywhere that's right a great way to feel close to those you love, even when you're separated. It has a black frame and a white

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Well, I mean, I related because I was selling software. Yes, for real? Yeah, before I did. For what company? Salesforce. Salesforce, for real? Yeah. For what company? Salesforce. Salesforce. Okay. Yes, I was selling insurance, doing hair.

I was hustling, you know, just trying to do it all so I could get more and more money, you know? And then one day when I went viral, people were just like, hey, aren't you that girl? And then it got kind of like overwhelming. So I left the hair salon, the part time thing, because I got tired of people coming in and being like, oh, my God. I'm like, girl, do you want this quick weave or not? You know, so that got to be annoying. But yeah, I ended up leaving from Allstate. Allstate.

Allstate. Do they still do you still have all state insurance uh no i have uh farmers i have farmers too farmers yes that's who i got that's the best he won an oscar who oh the what's the guy from when the guy from farmers won riley some jc yeah came out and was like he won an Oscar that's cute that's what I think of when I see the commercial so you would describe yourself as a proud hustler absolutely I would too do you find that has got I mean for me I you know I kind of had that hustler mentality, a grinder, and I feel like that's allowed me to not fail in LA so far.

Yeah, you got to have that. I wouldn't call myself successful yet, but I haven't crawled back home. That's fire. I think, yeah, in order to survive here, you got to have a hustler's mentality. I feel like a lot of people here does. When everything was open and you could catch an uber that often talked to different people what do you do i'm an actor i'm a singer you know but they're driving they're hustling to get their money to maintain the bills

and stuff while they go chase their dreams and i think that's admirable so yeah you gotta do in life we i think people do you think people are losing the hustler mentality in life nowadays? Do you think we're getting lazier? It depends who you're around, you know? Because some people, when certain things shut down, they're like, oh, I got to find something else, you know? I feel like it awoke the beast in a lot of people. And then for some people, I feel like it kind of discouraged them

and shook the tables a little bit it just depends who you ask okay i feel like i'm a lot of people i don't know sometimes what about for you i think it's it's a certain type of person that like kind of almost like has it or they don't yeah what did it do for you like did some stuff shut down for you and well i think I just can't. I had it. I've always been that way since I was a kid. You know, if you're like hustling, it's just like almost a personality.

I think so. When I played sports, you know, you ran track, I ran track. Lord, what else did you find out about me? Because you're digging kind of deep. That was in high school. Goodness gracious. Well, I mean, I have a good producer okay too much well there you're also a cheerleader if i'm just oh my god okay bachelor degree in spanish what did you what did you do in track um i did field events so i did initially distance but i was like oh i'm tired so um but to this day i hold the pole vaulting record for my high school

yeah and i still hold a couple high school records for real i gotta say my high school did shut down so nobody can ever beat my record but at the end of the day i was the last to do it that's pretty cool yeah it looks scary to me yeah i, Pulting's... I mean, would I do it today? No. But back then, when I didn't, I wasn't aware of the consequences and I was, you know, fair laced. Yeah. Yeah. Now I'm like, I'll break something. Exactly.

Me too. Yeah. But I mean, as far as to answer your question, I just always had it. And I remember the first thing I ever won in life. Won? Won. And what was that? A coloring contest in the first grade i'll never forget i'll

sit you know like in elementary school like you sit on the floor a lot yeah right like in teachers like they always had us on the floor you sit on the floor yeah and i remember them walking in to announce the winner of the coloring contest and the and it was i i remember this vividly i wish i still had it because i'd frame it but But it was a picture of like a church. And it had like the stained glass windows. And my mom was, you know, we went to church a lot. And so my mom, she's like, well, you got to color these little all different colors. Normally, like first graders are just like orange.

All right. You know, purple. And I just was like was like no each one is and i won check you out and i and i but that's not really important but i what is important is i remember them walking in and announcing the winner and saying my name and they walked in like i don't know a teacher or like you know because there was probably like three like two other first grade classes so it's probably a competition i don't remember but my guess is it was like a competition between all the first grade classes and so they walked in and they called my name and i just

remember being like this is fucking awesome what did you win i don't know just all friendly recognition dignity and a certificate well you you said in a previous interview when you get recognized by people that aren't like that's not your mom you know when your mom's like you're the best yes thanks they're supposed to say that but when someone else is giving you validation that you weren't expecting yeah i found that to be my drug i agree i absolutely agree uh it's it's intoxicating yeah you know and it feels really good and i'll never get tired of it. Yeah. And so in life, I think chasing that feeling was always my motivation factor to get over it, face adversity, try something new. If this didn't work, chase dreams, stuff like that. That's good.

And then imagine when that's paired with money. Oh, my God. I like your buying. Yes. And you are obviously doing well in that space. In money? I am very rich, darling. So let me stop.

I mean, I'm looking at your shoes. Well, I will say this whole outfit was complimentary. Okay. Even the wig. But I say that to say I'm very blessed and literally, but I'm still hungry. You know, I'll never stop being hungry. You know, and you you're someone who feel it seems like you're very you remain. This is who you are.

Yeah, that's who you were. So you are you're still down to earth. Yeah, like you're you're you. Yeah yeah you're big big personality but down okay yeah you don't think so um yes i think i'm a big personality um but oftentimes uh people tell me you know girl you a big deal and i'm like girl i'm'm just me. So that'd be weird. Are you dating in LA? I've been in a relationship for four years. Oh, congratulations.

Are you dating anyone? I don't want to know. Huh? What? You heard me. Who are you dating? Is this a public relationship? Did you bring him out here?

Did I bring him out here did i bring him out here we were living together but with the pandemic i ended up getting my own place child i was getting worn out you know so you were living with your boyfriend yes and pandemic hits you moved out i moved out and the relationship's still going well yes it's going better good for you guys it's going better actually um i didn't even realize that i needed space you know and it's cute because now it takes us back to the beginning where it's like you want to come over my house i'm cooking dinner you know it's really cute it's it's like a no i think that's great fresh start a lot of and was there ever a time in that period where either of you and i think it would be maybe more him because you're the one who moved out

people hate the idea of things yeah right yeah of course like oh well if we're in love we're not supposed to go backwards he hated it he did and understand it okay you know he did struggle with that yeah and but i was like i said look and it was it was a rough patch you know it's not all flowers and glitter um but it was definitely a rough patch but it worked out you know and i mean he's seven minutes away so it ain't nothing well that's but that's great i feel like a lot of relationships we do that right we honeymoon phase we rush into things we move in maybe we move in because like our leases are up we moved in with each other after three months yeah right and that's not that uncommon for a lot of reasons in new orleans for a lot of reasons people

do that right and then you're just like oh shit and then sometimes they just break up because they feel like well i feel a certain way i feel yeah and yet you just you just put the you just slowed it down yes i was like i'm used to being on the road i'm used to you know being gone and now i gotta look at you every day and you're attractive but honey it's annoying you know and so with that it's annoying, you know? And so with that, it was like, I got to have some space. I got to be creative. I got to be happy, you know, and at peace when I'm doing my job. You know, I can't get on here and make a whole bunch of people laugh when I'm not in a laughing

mood, you know? I don't like to be fake, you know? Well, yeah. So I felt like I have to get a genuine happiness replenished and go ahead and do that. So that way I could be in a good space online. You know, I feel like a lot of people are often there's this whole thing that I saw where there's like the happy mask on and then behind it, somebody's crying. It's not to that extent, but it's like that same kind of thought where it's like you're putting on for everybody but you're not taking care of yourself you know so i had to go ahead and do that

and it's fire it's so good that's great that's very very uh inspirational for everyone listening a lot of people think of how many relationships end because they moved too quickly felt a certain way and it felt like breaking up was the only option because yeah backtracking felt well like backtracking yeah well if we're not moving you know there's forward you're not moving forward you're dying kind of yes i feel like it's one of those things where people be forced and stuff and sometimes you got to take a step back and reroute. How did you get him to understand your point of view? He didn't understand until I left. And I forced him to understand.

And the first time the moving guy came in and take my stuff, he was like, you can leave. But did it feel like a breakup to him? I think so. I think he thought like it was over. You know, no matter how many times I explained that it wasn't. Like you were slow playing the breakup. Yes. But that wasn't the case.

I was like, trust me. Like, I know me. You know, this is going to be cute. You're going to like it. And, you know, later on he was like, I actually like it. You know, and also I got so much stuff. I didn't even realize that I needed a whole new place for all of my stuff. And it's like during the pandemic, it's gotten even worse.

I'm getting so many PR packages, so many. You know, I have a whole empty second bedroom with a bed and stuff for guests. But the whole closet is full of packages. So everybody knows where their Christmas gifts are coming from. closet is full of packages so everybody knows where our christmas gifts are coming from so how do you guys manage time in terms of like a lot of times people will move in together because if in a serious relationship you said you live seven minutes away and you're just like well i spend five nights a week here anyways do you guys do you spend a lot of time apart or how do you balance that and does he still like get whimpery when

when you're like i'm spending the night by myself uh no he doesn't um he's very much so like it's one of those things where when i'm working he's like you need anything you need some food you know so he'll bring me some food whatever if i'm too busy you know um and then sometimes he'll stay the night sometimes not so much he'll be like i'm tired i went to the gym i'm just going to stay at home you know and that's fine so it's one of those things to where it's not necessarily a schedule but it's no complaining either we just have very very good communication that's awesome yeah do you remember growing up up and thinking of certain things that were like,

weren't available to buy? Right? Like arcade games. I'm dating myself, but like, you know, now video games are crazy, but like you couldn't get, or movie quality set things.

You're just like, it was too good to like be, if you could buy it, it would be some generic version of something, but it wouldn't be like the movie quality masks. Like, you know, like if you want to be Che't be like the movie quality masks. Like, you know, like if you want to be Chewbacca like in Step Brothers,

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Have you always prioritized self-care and doing your thing? No. It took a long time for me to start doing that. A lot of times, I'm a workhorse. So I work nonstop. And that's the problem. For the very first time on my birthday um which was october 24th i did my first true vacation and left my laptop at home

and i had anxiety about it you know i can relate to that um especially living in la yeah i'm from wisconsin wisconsin i would i equate vacation with like bad weather you know it's like okay you know what I'm saying like it's February I get the fuck out of here yeah

and so because I live in LA it's like where there's no bad weather there's no bad weather I don't ever feel like I need to like leave for a trip and being a hustler

and like self-employed like you it's just like well if I'm not it's not like a vacation day yeah you know when you're working for an insurance company it's like well i got how many vacation days exactly i still get my paycheck you're right now i'm just like well if i leave i'm not making money and i'm not moving exactly so i have a very i have a hard time listen i was

on a trip with amazing they are all like business owners successful business owners and I we had a little kumbaya moment around the fire pit and um we were like well what's your goals and I said I literally want to take time to unplug stop and enjoy my accomplishments from time to time and literally everybody was like how do you do that and I was like well I don't know I just wanted to put that out there because that's a goal of mine you know but we were all on the same page we really don't know how to unplug you know and when we do have great accomplishments and stuff we don't even stop and say dang I did that we on to the next thing like what's going on you know so I say that to say self-care no it hasn't always been a thing and it's still a work in progress for me something I'm trying to work on

I did it for two days I want to get back to it I bought a house so then I was for some reason that was an excuse to like go back to my bad habits but I've been trying to plug my phone in in like the living room uh-huh and then going to bed so that like i'm not on my phone for like the like a good you know whatever time i lie in bed and think about thoughts or watch tv just i'm not on my phone and then go to bed and then when i wake up the first thing i don't do is grab the phone it's i did it for like three days. It was quite nice. That is cute. I stopped doing it, but I need to, I want to get, it's a goal.

I want to get back to that habit. I wake up every morning and I just be like, okay, I look around the room. I feel my legs because I noticed people be going straight to their phone

before they even see if they low-key went paralyzed in the legs before waking up. Yeah, that would be me. I've used like things like the election and things like that as an excuse to be like well i need i need i can't wait yeah yeah this morning i woke up and um started putting subtitles on the video because i saw this video a tiktok where it said what deaf people hear in the whole video i

was waiting for sound and then there was a part of the video where they had them looking at their phone and they just threw it down and they said no subtitles irritating so I was like you know what let me start putting subtitles on my video for the hard-of-hearing you know so that's the first thing I woke up and did this morning. I say that to say my phone is always in my hand. We started with our clips doing that. There is an online site where they will literally do it for you. It probably take an hour.

So I'm not going to say their name because they're not paying me on this podcast. But I'll tell y'all when we go off air. I use an app. Yeah. Y'all should put it on y'all stuff. YouTube, yeah. I'm just starting this today, but I'm like so for it. Yeah, no, I agree.

I have a niece that's hard of hearing. She has like hearing aids. Yeah. So it's like I noticed those things a little bit more now. Yeah. Yeah. I saw you say something that I really quite liked. I'd like more thoughts, your thoughts on it.

You talked about awkward thoughts. I just thought that was cool. Where do you say that at? You did an interview and you said you had awkward thoughts and you feel maybe more appreciated now for those thoughts yes yes yes it's funny I asked you where you started at because I say it but I would like to know what context I said it but now that you said that I know what you're talking about when I was younger I realized yes I had a whole bunch of awkward thoughts and I'd be like what the heck like I'm a real weirdo you know but today those same awkward thoughts executed

in video form got people laughing so um yeah it's just people kids are harsh you know and what's different to them everyone's harsh these days but yeah yeah um but especially like growing up and stuff kids are very one-track minded and so if something doesn't fit the popular thing they're like you're weird you know so i would never say it out loud because i didn't want to be weird you know but i'd be like dang like i realized when i was writing in my diary i went back to my childhood diary the stuff that i was writing i did a youtube video on it ghetto very ghetto okay one star wouldn't recommend it was horrible um just this just the stuff like the way that i was thinking about like scenarios with friends

like one thing that comes to mind immediately and you're probably like what the heck but um this guy we were kids he was uh cheating on his girlfriend at the time and I was like but he my friend so I'm not gonna tell her you know and I'm like why am I even writing about this in my diary as a kid like what and I thought I was doing something with my loyalty you know but yeah I was just I was doing something with my loyalty, you know? But yeah, I was just, I was different in the head. I mean, you were younger. Young, yeah. Do you have strong thoughts on loyalty and the balance between being the good friend

and being a good person? Yeah. It's, it depends on what it is, you know? With being a good person, when it comes to relationships and me saying somebody else's stuff my loyalty depends on your stupidity right so I say that to say I could sit up here and be loyal to you and tell you exactly what I saw your dude doing but if you're going to keep going back being stupid, then my loyalty is going to die down. I'm still going to be your friend.

But my loyalty is not going to include me telling you about what your man is doing. It also could be subjective, too. Like, you know, you could debate what does it mean to be a good friend? You could be a yes friend. Just tell them what they want to hear. Oh, there's a lot of that. I would argue that's not being a good friend. I agree.

Great friends would be like, you're being shitty. Yeah. And loyalty can fall into that pocket of being like, well, I'm loyal to you, but I'm going to be loyal to you by telling you you need to hold yourself accountable because if you don't, I will because I'm going to be a good friend. I agree. I agree. It's definitely subjective and I also feel like it's a case-by-case basis.

Yeah. Where do you, in relationships, how loyal are you to, I mean, like, I don't mean, like, being faithful. I mean, but, like, you know, the balance between being independent and then being committed to, like, the partnership or relationship. being committed to like the partnership or relationship? Sometimes I could be loyal to a fault, I think. But at the same time, one thing that I do that I feel like is very important is I put myself first, right? Because I feel like if I don't, a lot of people put, and this is just me generally speaking, not specifically my relationship.

I noticed that a lot of people will put their relationship first and it caused them as an individual to fall back, you know, and I don't ever want to do that. We can't win as a unit if I'm not on my best, you know, so I hope that answers your question. Yeah, it totally does. does okay have you always been that way like when you meet it like because a lot of people will get in a relationship and do what you're suggesting right or they'll just be focused on getting him or her to like them back they're not making any decisions for themselves when i was young i was dumb like most so no i haven't always been like that like what was there a moment where you're just like, why am I doing this? After my last relationship before this one, I was like, okay, let's evaluate some things.

I didn't even, I just slipped and fell into this relationship. It wasn't even supposed to happen. Yes. Because in my mind, I was just going to be the single rich auntie. You know? Okay. yes um because in my mind i was just going to be the single rich auntie you know um okay so what that is like uh i very much so i'm like these are my boundaries that i'm going to set in place for myself and if i ever start slipping you know anything like that it's a problem but you know he's also real good at that too he's like make sure you hit up your friends make sure you do this you know so we support your independence hell yeah he do if he didn't that

would be a problem you know do you have do you have i mean i know i agree with you but i feel a lot of people struggle with that i feel like it's right or it's just like that balance between again like real confidence and love is yeah go do your thing go be independent like i don't you know supporting each other's i couldn't be with someone who didn't in fact i really need that in a relationship someone to like do you have that pardon me do you have that in what this is a safe space i feel like i'm currently hanging out with someone who does that yeah okay good all right i was almost getting concerned okay good i haven't always had that but that's something i don't think i realized i needed yeah and like early relationships i always it was always

me doing that yeah and i was like i'll be fine you know and in terms of someone who was like i i didn't realize I required a cheerleader as much as I thought I did you know I think a lot of time who believed in me that's fire I think a lot of times people don't realize how much it's necessary until they get it and then they realize that they were missing it from their prior situation because I've always been very confident I'm like I I've always believed in myself yes and so I didn't require it in relationships because I was like, I'm good.

I'm good. You know? And then I sometimes feel like I dated people where my confidence rubbed off on them in a bad way that almost made them feel insecure. Insecure. And so instead of being like my cheerleader, they would just try to poke holes.

And then I had people in my life that were that like they're like they would compliment me and say i believe in you and i didn't realize how much that and then you look at how good it felt you're just like yeah and it was just like i didn't realize i didn't think i it felt it it made me feel weak to think i needed a cheerleader like oh you need people like really you need a cheerleader. Like, oh, you need people, like, really? You need a cheerleader? Yeah, that's not the case. But it's an important thing. It is important. You've got to be with somebody who supports you and cheers for you as much as you do yourself.

Because to me, that's a reflection of how they see themselves. If they can't even support their partner, they're not supporting themselves. Because if your partner wins, you win, you know? And that's just all over red flags to me yeah so what are you working on these days everything currently um my podcast called the salon um is everywhere it's so cute we talk about everything you know it's basically is that like the idea like you go into the salon and have you know conversations about whoever's there you know it's basically is that like the idea like you go into the salon and have you know

conversations about whoever's there you know depending on who's in the salon will determine what kind of conversation you're having so i have all kinds of people come you know like lena wade super scent kim whitley um suki hana all kinds of guests so sukihana is she's a entertainer rapper who's very vulgar and nasty you know um and i love it you know then there's super cent she's very much so a business woman uh from new orleans who always drops knowledge but she also share her personal business so we just talk about every single topic you know and there's no boundaries and i love it just like the salon it's real unfiltered and raw yeah i feel like it is i mean i don't know it's been a long time barbershop i haven't really been to a lot of barbershops

what you be cutting your own hair i do i pandemic yeah but no but i guess i go to a i guess a salon yeah you shaved your head you'll be getting your wig done pardon me you'll be getting your wig done at the salon no well what do i go i guess i guess i guess a salon right like i before the pandemic i'd yeah i had a stylist a hairdresser you don't have a barber so What's the difference between a barber and a stylist? A barber cuts your hair. Is it men specifically? No, barbers be cutting women's hair too. She got a low cut and stuff.

Shorties would be considered like a barber. Like shorties. What do you mean shorties? Shorties on Fairfax? Never mind. When you go to the salon, what do they do? They shampoo your hair? Yeah.

And do they cut your beard and stuff? They would if I wanted them to, but but usually no i'd trim my own beard do they cut your hair at all yeah i would say that's a barber yeah but she also she or he i've had both do like coloring to other like from they don't do that for me but they have other color your me, but they have other. I was just going to say, you color your hair. No, but they have other clients. Like, a barber could cut my hair. Like, I have no needs more than what you, I guess you would describe as a barber. But I don't know if I go to a barber. You know, now you're confusing me on what a barber is. Me too.

You know what I've never had is a close shave. For real? Well, what is that on your face? You mean like with a blade? Yeah got it got it you know i feel like that's what a barber does right yeah when i think about that i think about the color purple and i don't want one oh right you know yeah she literally was yeah sharpening up that blade and yeah you know you gotta watch it because obviously you haven't seen it she messed that up did she kill him or something? came close you haven't seen the color purple

should I have seen it? get out I mean that was like required in high school come on now who's in it? like oh Oprah Winfrey made whoopie like

Oscar status i thought that was ghost oh no what that was that's how i remember whoopi what was the movie i mean i'm not that much older what was the what was the movie with whoopi and ted danson oh that one was crazy when they dated where they dated and like she she had the ted ted dancing was the surrogate father or something he was a car sale it was i don't know what movie that is but tell me it was a terrible movie it's a terrible movie my podcast i'm working on that i'm working on building two companies um literally for merch um they're going to be really cute i'm not even going to say because i don't want nobody to try to take my ideas you know how it go but sourcing for that being fit you know

being up in the gym honey getting these gains working on my big butt that you've seen when i walked in the door um modeling i've been doing photo shoots and stuff like that and just create you can do a pose girl come on you know bow cover girl autumn out there essence holla at your girl um so those and uh lastly what is the last thing oh auditions of course and um i forgot the last thing but i randomly shouted out before this is over. Are we going to be getting to see you in any major motion films or TV shows coming up? You will. And it's not on paper, but I'm just telling you because I know it's coming.

Just putting it out there. Yes, I'm putting it out there. Oh, aren't you coming up with a feminine hygiene thing too? Yes, girl. Well, dang, she just put out one of my businesses. there oh is it aren't you coming up with a feminine hygiene thing too yes girl well dang she just put out one of my businesses basically um i'm normalizing talking about women's vaginas you know yes good for you yes it's such a taboo and it's such a like oh my god you know girl it's okay you're like when people walk in this like the girls walk in this aisle in the store

and they're like do i want it should i yes like no let's normalize if you're gonna buy like a feminine like soap anything like that yeah and our ph balances being off so they're being an odor they have sprays they have all different kinds of things but i feel like women when you walk down the aisle before you grab for something you kind of like do the look over your shoulder to see if anyone's seeing you grab it. Do you feel like a lot of women aren't and don't know a lot about their vaginas? Yeah, I feel like a lot of them don't know about it. But also when they do, they're embarrassed to talk about it with somebody else.

With other women? Yeah. Yeah. Mm-hmm. I feel like common issues that exist, they be like, well, I'm not going to say that because that's embarrassing. But they don't even realize the person who they probably want to talk to done had the same issue before. You know? So, yeah.

Yeah. Do you think people in relationships should be able to talk about that? Yeah. Yes. If they don't, yeah. I don't know. Do you not talk about it with your partner? Well, if I...

Cut that part out. What do you mean talk about it? With people you've been hanging out with in the past, in past relationships, have you ever not talked about like... Like if you're, for example, right? Give me an example. All right.

First of all, I know that men be so disgusted when it comes to a woman having her cycle. And it's like, oh my God. I'm not. it comes to a woman having her cycle and it's like oh my god i'm i'm not that's good you shouldn't be because it's normal and it happens every month but to some men it's just like oh my god you know listen if the field's open i'm still playing that's good that's good i think that also if you want to like if you want to if you want to like if you want to put a pause in it for maintenance, also fine. But I'm just saying, like.

I'm just saying, like, bro. Listen. Like, I respected you before, but I respect you more now. Come on, now. That's big. I think that's fire. Yes. Because a lot of people, a lot of men especially, be like, oh, my God.

You know, all right, well, I'll just. You know, but I say that to say for example if a girl's coming off her cycle oh my god i like this man so you be running red lights yeah blowing right through them amplifacist because this is good okay and that's not common no like a guy would be like i just you know in dating situations i guess i there's be like well you know i'm on my period i'm like okay yes some women be afraid to say i'm on my period because of men having adverse reaction but also there might be a freaking stench after her cycle because it's the last couple days or something like that it's a little iron you know a little oh my god see it needs a conversation

it really does it's fine it's like a casino it's like slot machines oh my god that's so funny because that's what i say i like i say oh my god it's metallic like that's what i say um there are worse smells i agree i agree morning breath oh my god yes yes go that way but yes people are afraid to girls are afraid to talk if something's going on, if she has a freaking yeast infection, which are actually common and normal. It's like, oh my God, like, you know, and it's like, girl, talk about it so I could tell you what to do about it. Question. Go ahead. Do you think that, I'm sure it's both, but do you think it's more women are insecure about talking about it and they assume guys there's a stigma around it and

they assume most guys won't or in your experience do you find that men often have a very immature reaction to these topics you know what i'm saying because in my experience i've had women mention this like if i'm in an early dating situation and i'm like well you know we can't because like you know and i'm like i don't, and I'm like, I don't care. If you don't care, I don't care. Yeah. And so then it's like, then it's like, okay. Yeah. But I have to like let them know I don't care.

So my question is, are men making women feel like there's something wrong or are women presuming men think it's gross? I'm not going to sit up here and say that it's necessarily men, but there are just simply a lot of women who do not like to talk about those things because of whatever was planted in their mind that people are disgusted by other women and men, not just men alone. You know, it's a conversation that women often don't want to have with women because they feel like a woman might look at her different or something you know like even on prime example a tv show like a girl had like some cream in her purse or something there's like yeah girl that's why you

need to work on that vagina because you keeping that cream on you and it's like so what so what you know there's nothing like i discussed i'm a clean person but there's nothing i'm disgusting in general so like how can that obviously you are and a lot of people are going to be like oh my god i can't believe that he said that but i think it's admirable i'm just mean like you know we all do things where i'm just like, I'm glad no one knows about that. Well, they know now. Just in general. I'm not going to get specifics, but... Hardwood floors. Towels.

Peroxide. Yeah. Avoid carpet. Yes. Peroxide definitely does help to get blood out of... Blood stains out of something. I've heard. Yeah.

So it definitely works to any women out there you know if you got stains in your panties whatever catch it fresh put some peroxide in there girl and just scrub it out you'll be good to go yeah also try it on the try it on the boyfriend i feel like you don't care warn him no don't just sneak it on him child next scene no i mean like if you're dating if you're dating don't assume that he doesn't want to yeah yeah i mean it's a conversation to be had hey i i just feel like if you're dating someone early on and he acts like a 12 year old boy to you being on your period that's a huge red flag no pun intended i was about to say you would say red huh um but it's like really you're a child

well how could you date someone who had who yeah i don't know we can't have those conversations you mean yeah yeah i i haven't had that issue so so I can't really say. But I just know in general with women, it's just like a taboo. Don't go there. Red zone. Well, thanks for doing it. I mean, I don't. I do what I can. Yeah.

Before I let you go. Already? Already. What else do you want to talk about? I want to talk. I'm just playing talk i'm just playing no great come on we could talk for hours don't worry i don't have anything else i'm glad that you seem to be enjoying yourself i am this is really cute it's been a while to be in a room with somebody we're gonna play a game if it's okay

with you yeah let's play do you's called Do You Know Me? Okay. And Chrissy and I are going to guess who knows you better. Okay, this is good. I'm going to read these very generic or specific questions

and don't answer right away out loud thinking in your head. Okay, all right. It's a simple yes or no will suffice. But if you have an anecdotal story

to describe why you answered the way you did, please share. All right. I'm here for it. Do you know me with Lala Milan? Yeah. Question number one. Chrissy picked these out. Okay.

Disclaimer. All right. Does Lala have any specific turn-ons you know that's a very generic question with the word specific in it oh okay just want to point that out how is it generic any turn-ons any specific ones that's what i'm saying because i would be like it's very specific like your neck or you're like you know i mean yeah everyone does everyone has a specific everyone has something that turns you on which would make it specific yes that's what i mean tear apart the question but also i'm going to say yes yes because everyone does yeah everybody does yeah right which is yours um well see i wasn't gonna go that deep and i'm still not okay so my specific turn on is a man that smells good oh yeah looks good and just keeps himself together

you know like we could be going somewhere real quick and you just come out smelling like some cologne and some some good lotion. And I'm like, boy, where are you going? Who are you getting dressed for? Calm down. You're doing too much. But I really like it, you know. But not too much cologne.

There's nothing worse than like a guy who wears cologne. Not a baptism. And when you hug them, like their smell sticks to you. That is so gross. You just put a little bit on. You put a little bit on. So like you just should always smell like you put on cologne three hours ago yeah i think that's a good way to put it yeah not too much at all um

and obviously put it in the right spots that's how it will smell like when they get close you smell good yeah that's i don't want to know you're in a personal space it's like i don't it's not it's not supposed to be a warning and I tend to find the men in my family. They douse themselves. We call it a Cuban shower. That's hilarious. That's hilarious. Yeah, it's not supposed to be an alarm for your approach.

It's funny because one of my neighbors, I can't ever, ever catch him. But I always know that he's been in the hallway because I can smell his cologne. And I'm like, I know he runs through a bottle a week so gross anyway question number two all right has lala ever muted one of their friends on instagram and by friends i mean like someone who if you they found out you muted them would be offended but you found their uh content to be obnoxious? I'm going to say yes. There's too many people in the feeds these days. You got to meet some people.

I'm going to say no only because I feel like she's just doing her own thing and she doesn't sweat the small stuff and if it bothered her that much, she would tell her friend. Well, I have. Who is it it was my friend ash i'm just playing she's like jonathan bennett i literally i did because i was like uh i'm tired of seeing this but um for the people who aren't necessarily my friends and it's just in passing and stuff.

I had to unfollow button. Like one time this dude, he was always posting his butt cheeks and I follow him because he's a stylist. And I'm like, I didn't come on here to see this, you know? And I told him in person, I said, honey, I unfollowed you because I'm tired of looking at your cheeks. He was like, well, follow my hair page. And I say, you ruined that. Because I'm tired of looking at your cheeks. He was like, well, follow my hair page. And I say, you ruined that. I love it. And why is he posting his butt?

That was the question of the day. I'll do a lot of things, but I won't do that. Look. Look. And I have a great ass. I'll take your word for it. Has Lala ever used the oven in the last 24 hours? Yes.

Sure. No, I'm not based on that. I'm going to still say yes. I'm going to say no, just because I haven't. No, I have not. I do use the oven a lot, but not in the last 24 hours i bake a lot of chicken okay i like it has lala ever sent a nude yes yes i have a boyfriend for four years well you guys are absolutely correct and of course yes i used to send i used to be so paranoid that i would send my new with um his name watermarks on there because i was like i don't trust you just

yet but at the same time i want you to see you know what i'm blessed with but if it gets out i'll know it came from you because it got your name on it what that is so smart yeah i used to watermark my nudes that is so freaking brilliant and i've never heard of that before yeah i know it sounds crazy but i was obviously social media it's not crazy it's not crazy it's smart if ever gets out i'm gonna be like who the heck daequan you know like that so wow that might be the most helpful takeaway of this uh wow yeah well there you go a takeaway is there an app for that news um yeah there's there's plenty of apps just type in watermark apps and you'll find plenty.

I don't remember which one I'm using. You should come up with your own kind of watermark app for that. For nudes? Yeah, that'd be fun. So if it gets out, you know who did it. That's hilarious. That's fucking great. That's funny.

Has Lala ever fallen asleep during sex? I'm going to say no. I'm going to say no. I'm going to say no as well. If anybody has, that's kind of pathetic on the other person. Dude, is that a thing? Some people it's a thing. Really? I mean, it's a thing enough to have a question about it.

I guess. That's hilarious. You have to feel like a tired mom and you're like, fine. Yeah. Let's just do it tonight, honey. Maybe you get tired i hope that never reached that point in my life if your life is that missionary that you're falling asleep during sex you gotta figure it out last question does lala have a go-to pickup line

no i'm gonna say her pickup line is, you're fire. Is what? You're fire. That's hilarious. I feel the way that question reads is like you have like, I always say this and it always works. But you know what's funny? I feel like dudes do,

but I wouldn't even have a pickup line. It's a situational thing. But if you're a guy and you have a pickup line, I feel like it's weird. Corn ball. Yeah. There might be like an approach you do. Like when it sounds like,

how do you slide into a DM? There's a way to go about it. You don't use the same line. How do you slide into DMs? Honestly, you just say anything. What do you say? If I were to slide into your DM, I'd go to your page. honestly, it just doesn't, you just say anything. What do you say? If, if I were to slide in your door.

Okay. I'd go to your page. Mm-hmm. I would find the picture that is the least about you. Okay. None.

It's in no way sexual. Mm-hmm. You know, or the least sexual. Uh-huh. And then I would send that picture to you. Mm-hmm.

And ask some sort of benign question about something in you're stupid and all it's like a picture of a lake and you're gonna send it to her and be like where is this lake what a beautiful lake yeah or like maybe you put on maybe maybe you put on one of your incredible outfits and i would write i have the same one in purple i don't know something that's so funny it doesn't matter the point is clearly i want to talk to you i'm not going to be like every other guy who's like you're so hot you know like you know you're hot and like you know i'm not gonna like i'm just gonna be like i'm gonna try to strike up a conversation the assumption is i'm not gonna slide in like i don't care about if strike up a conversation the assumption is i'm not going to slide in like

i don't care about if there's a promo code for that i've done that uh-huh be like is there a promo code for that or is there a promo code for your blender that's in the background i've asked that see and i wouldn't even get a response from me because but dang now i'm thinking about it i'm like that wouldn't make you smile or laugh approach um i just i get so many questions from people that i can't even answer them all so i would just overlook it so if i was interested in dating and somebody would have to be like you're in a relationship now yeah they will have to be direct even if i was to answer i am so afraid of answering my dms if even if i was single i just wouldn't well i get yes because everybody screenshots is out here the next thing you know how many other in my mind how many other hoes inbox you done slid into

with the same pickup line you know so i'm just like no I can't trust it I gotta meet somebody in person you know and that's what I prefer I and also too men be so courageous in the inbox but wouldn't say that in person you know I can't stand I've seen it happen with some of my friends or even just it's a running joke where it's like guys will see you in person not say nothing then coming to your inbox you look real good tonight boy why you ain't say nothing in person? You know? Oh, like they see him all night and they leave. Yes.

And you're like, wow, I really like your dress. Yes. And she was probably eyeing him too. But he was such a punk that he ain't want to say nothing until later on. Yeah. Yeah. Social media done kind of messed it up for men. The easiest thing to do is compliment people.

I agree. I agree. People just practice complimenting people. You look really nice today. Yeah. But like even someone like of the same sex. What a great jacket. Oh, yeah.

I'd be guessing girls up. Yeah. But just in general, practice complimenting people. So when you do it to someone else, you don't feel weird and creepy. Yeah. But I feel like if you're sending a DM afterwards to tell someone they look nice, what you're really saying is like,

I want to put my dick in you. Well. Like if you can't give someone a simple compliment, like your dress looks nice to their face, there's bigger issues there. Well, people get nervous and awkward. I think that a lot. I'm not saying they don't want to,

but like that's just. People from person to person interaction. So nowadays people don't even have the traditional, what is now courage to speak to somebody in person, you know? Yeah. That's what social media has kind of done. It has. So it's sad, but it's reality.

Well, on that note, thank you so much for coming on. Thank you so much for having me. Where can people find you? You can find me on Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, YouTube, all that, la la my line. Also, Honest Align, which is on all podcasts, wherever you get your podcasts from, whether it's Stitcher, whether it's Appleer Whether it's Apple Whether it's Spotify SiriusXM I'm there

Come holla at your girl Just type in La La Milan Because apparently Everybody got the salon Alright Well thank you so much Thank you This has been a ton of fun

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