The Viall Files - E217 The Great Turtleneck Debate With Brendan Morais

Episode Date: December 29, 2020

In this episode of The Viall Files, we are joined by Brendan Morais who stole not only the heart of our friend Justin Long but also, America. Nick finally has a chance to apologize for pronouncing his name wrong all season and to really take some time to get to know who Brendan is beyond his amazing turtlenecks. Brendan shares with us his thoughts on which of the guys he thought were there for love, what he would do if he & Tayshia and had more time, and what he would do if she ever called again. It’s a fun episode filled with guest pop-ins and matchmaking for our last episode of 2020.  “One of my biggest regrets is not bringing more turtlenecks to Palm Springs“ Please make sure to subscribe so you don’t miss an episode and as always send in your relationship questions to [e-mail] to be a part of our Monday episodes.  THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSORS: Fight Camp: http://www.joinfightcamp.com/FILES for a 30-day trial and free shipping  Proactiv: http://www.proactiv.com/VIALL to subscribe to clear skin  Episode Socials:  @viallfiles @nickviall @brendanmorais  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

What's going on everybody welcome to another episode of the vile files I hope you guys had a wonderful Christmas if that's the holiday you celebrate, separate, or whatever holiday that you enjoyed, I hope it was wonderful. Hope you're staying safe, warm with your families. We have a great episode for you. Brendan joins us, and him and I discuss how I butcher his name often. We also have a surprise for Brendan. I'm guessing if you've been listening to this podcast,

you can guess who it might be who pops in quickly to say hello to his boy. And it's a really fun conversation. And he shares, you know, his experience on the show. And we have a very detailed and important discussion about turtlenecks. I hope that you will enjoy it. We'll get right to Brendan. If you have not yet checked out our Ask Nick episode this week, do that. If you love listening to people's relationships, problems, and stories,

and it's the type of show that we learn a lot about ourselves and relationships from the stories that people share and the advice that is given. Don't forget to subscribe. Rate us five stars. I can't thank you enough for supporting this show this year. It's been a really fun 2020 with you guys. I know 2020

hasn't been fun on its own, but it has been fun spending it with you guys. I hope that you got as much enjoyment out of listening to this podcast as i have uh gotten out of uh recording it and uh really can't thank you enough so as always thank you for all the support you guys have given us this year big plans for the show next year which is you know next week we'll we'll kick off uh matt james's recap

uh we got a fun guest lined up, uh, and I won't spoil it because, you know, scheduling things happen and it's not Sarah Silverman and, uh, but something great. Um,

but, uh, yeah, I think that's it. Uh, thanks again. So, uh,

guys for supporting the show and without further ado, Brendan, Brendan, thanks so much for joining us how you doing buddy i'm doing great thank you for having me uh we have so much to talk about i can't wait to do it but before we really get into it i do have a surprise for you uh someone wanted to say hi and is this your biggest fan so we're just gonna let him pop in uh he's i think on a road trip right now somewhere okay oh that's why he's on his Oh, that's why he's on his phone.

Yeah. That's why he's on his phone. There he is. I don't see him. He's there. It's connecting to his audio. Hold on. There he goes.

There he is. There's Justin. Hey. Oh, Brendan. Hey. What's going on Oh, Brendan, hey. What's going on, man? How are you? How's it going? Wait.

I like the beard. Thank you. Thank you. We've gotten comparisons, right? Am I wrong in saying that in resemblance? I wish. No, I feel like we have. Really? That's very flattering to me. I don't know who would have said that.

Nobody I know. The internet's an interesting thing. I think we've gotten comparisons before. So it was obviously flattering for me as well. Oh, that is very flattering. You're such a handsome guy. I don't know who would have said that. But you're also, I got to tell you. Hey, Nick. Hey, Chrissy. Sorry. Hey, Justin. This is your time, Justin. I don't want to interrupt., Nick, hey, Chrissy. Hey, buddy. Hey, Justin. No, this is your time, Justin.

I don't want to interrupt. It's your moment, man. It's your moment. All right, guys. Don't make it to, you know. Oh, Jesus. Whoa. We can't die on that now.

Sorry. My brother's driving. Hey, buddy. I'm driving on one lane. That was close. Sorry not i'm not driving myself um wow that was really scary well that would have been um well that would have been not a funny way to die but that would not have been good i got a lot of downloads i just met you and then you die right now that wasn't tragic but well you know if you're the last person I see Brendan not the worst thing yeah I mean you know take me into the afterlife

your last sight you know uh how are you doing how are you feeling after um how long has it been since you saw since that that exit it was very I I really it it was so impressive, by the way, the way you, how honest you were and just how in touch you were with what you were feeling and how you were able to communicate that. It was, I just found it so impressive. Thank you. No, I appreciate that. Yeah, that was, that was the beginning of September. So it's been a couple months now. Okay.

Yeah. months now okay yeah yeah and and you know have haven't spoken with Tayshia since and and uh recently kind of reached out to her to congratulate her on the big engagement and everything but um yeah it was uh I'm doing good I'm obviously how do you feel yeah no I mean I feel um I feel confident in the decision I made for sure and stayed true to myself and how I felt in the moment. And in hindsight, I definitely don't regret anything, but I'm still sad about it. Absolutely still sad that that's the way it played out.

And, you know... Sorry, Brennan. Where are you? out and you know Justin's in a car and he's like losing his moment with his biggest crush he's an upstate New York is it driving what there you go i bet i was just wondering he's gonna be so upset that was like this slow motion so brendan i don't know if you've listened to our episodes with Justin, but he's like Oh sorry, if you would have more time to see how it progressed. It's remote.

There we go. Fake freeze. That was a fake freeze. Oh, he's calling. All right. All right. If it weren't on. This is.

Oh, hold on. He's calling. Hey, buddy. I think he's so excited. So Brendan, like i don't like i said i don't know if you know listen but like we've did a bunch of episodes with justin long and he is like your biggest fan and he was like crushed like okay it was like so funny so he just wanted to jump on and say hi because it was like he's like the biggest fan no this is actually amazing i i haven't listened to to any of the episodes so i had no i honestly had no idea not the slightest idea but that's definitely flattering everyone listening is

gonna know brendan okay yeah everyone listening is gonna know like we even posted something on the instagram that like when you left that Justin Long is going to need help. He loves you so much. That hurts me the most to disappoint him and break his time. Attempt made during holiday travel.

That was amazing. Even though the few words we said to each other will be with me forever so we thank justin uh sorry uh he had some uh technical difficulties he's uh in upstate new york we're in a remote area so uh he just wanted to say hi and he's uh he's a big fan of yours brendan uh that was was amazing. That was definitely flattering. The last person I expected to fall off there. I think what he wanted to ask is that, obviously, time is limited in that world in general, right?

You guys had even less time with Tayshia taking over for Claire. time with Tayshia taking over for Claire um and with you know for you you so much of your story obviously was about you haven't been married before and kind of coming into this world which I got the impression it was pretty new to for you if you would have had more time with Tayshia like say in the real world or you, let's say this was just a much longer process. Do you think you might've been able to come around and, and it was, was it about just the information you didn't have or looking back now, uh, having been able to process that he experienced, do you more, do you feel it's just more, maybe Tayshia just wasn't your person as much as you, you know, might think she's great and all that?

Yeah, I mean, that's a great question. As much as, you know, obviously I love the show and I love the idea of, you know, okay, these 30 something guys going after this one beautiful woman. The concept of that, you know, is great for the purposes of the show. But yeah, I feel like without a doubt, if I had had more time with Tayshia one on the show, because obviously with Claire, it was two weeks with her there. And then Tayshia came on and I legitimately only knew Tayshia for a month's time. But this is what I tell my family to this day, that if I were able to remove Tayshia from the desert Palm Springs and La Quinta bubble and date her in the real world and find out about, you know, what type of food she loved, what she, you know, did for work, what she her hobbies were.

And of course, those things aren't necessarily vital to falling in love with a woman. But I was so, you know, concerned with making the right decision and only doing this once, you know, following a divorce and making sure this was exactly the right move for me. So, yeah, I feel like if I had more time and I could have removed Tayshia from that bubble and really see how our lives mesh together. Yeah, I definitely felt like we could have dated and potentially more. But, you know, when you're protecting yourself and when you don't want to get hurt again, you do things that self-sabotage

what could be an amazing thing. So yeah, I definitely think it could have played out differently if a few things had changed. Interesting. Justin's calling hold on i love that it's making such an effort because he's so obsessed yeah um i

okay i'll let him know that i and i i picked i think i picked up on your question he actually just answered that and and his answer just so you know is that he he does think regrettably that if he had more time with her in the real world and it wasn't in the pressure of this environment he definitely sees a possibility uh we nailed his question that's exactly what he wanted to know um and he said obviously you guys had such a great connection and he also wants to point out that he absolutely loved that you had no idea who neil lane was oh not the slightest i saw this guy playing the piano and i'm lookingshia, like looking for someone to clue me in, and I'm like, can someone please help me out here? I have no idea who this is, and I know I should.

And during the lie detector test date, that was a question that Tayshia asked. Like, oh, do you know who Neil Lane is? I'm like, no. And then it rang true, you know, that I'll tell him the truth. And until someone said this guy makes rings, then I had no idea who he was. Hey, did you know this episode is brought to you by fight camp that's right fight camp brings the boxing gym right to your home with a mix of cardio and conditioning for a full body workout boxing

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the green tea moisturizer. You also get free shipping. Again, visit Proactive.com slash V-I-A-L-L to take advantage of this special offer. Now that's Proactive.com slash V-I-A-L-L to take advantage of this special offer. Now that's proactive.com slash V-I-A-L-L and subscribe to clear skin. Should have just put Justin up to the microphone. Did you hear him at all? We could hear him talking to you. That's what I was saying. You should have, I should have put it on speaker.

I should have put it on speaker. I'm an idiot. The best part of the whole thing was his slow-mo. Like if you had more and i'm like i know where you're going well how how are you uh also brendan i just want to off the bat uh you probably don't know this i've been butchering your name throughout this this season of brandon brandon brandon in my defense there was a different brandon and as i as i mentioned to ben i don't always enunciate my words and well like valentine's is a perfect example i know it's valentine's but if i don't think valentine's

it's just gonna sell in valentine's and that's how that's my excuse with with brendan all right that was yeah no that was a completely valid excuse am i the only asshole in this world or have other people struggled with this enunciation of your name i mean it's like still to this day if i like am online or twitter or whatever and um people are butchering my name like they have it as a reference like go to whatever google me go to the bachelorette instagram for reference or whatever and people are still like brand it brand on um all sorts of different spellings and I still blame my mom she was gonna name me like Andre or something cool and then name you Brendan you kind of look like an Andre and not yeah you could totally pull off Andre totally is that why is that is that now I gotta

ask the turtleneck you are sporting first of all you look beautiful you wear it so well is this like did you do this for us are you leaning into the turtleneck which by by by the way if you are great or or are you just truly do you have a superman closet full of turtlenecks yeah yeah no i mean there's literally nothing i did what you guys saw in palm springs that that i tried to lean into in any way or be different than than who i am on a normal day-to-day basis. I have dozens of turtlenecks and one of my biggest regrets to this day is not bringing more to Palm Springs. I'm like, I'll bring like four or five. Dude, it was like 120 degrees there. How are you never sweating? Do you have like a little air conditioning pack like inside that you wore? How did you

control your body? Do you have any notes for us on how you control your body temperature so well? I mean, you just got to stay cool and calm and collected. No, I mean, I was sweating for sure, but I run definitely a little colder. So I was able to like, while the guys were dripping sweat, you know, with a regular tee on it,

of course I sweat too. I was able to stay, you know, relatively comfortable with the turt. Of course I sweat too. Um, I was able to stay, you know, relatively comfortable with the turtleneck on. And at the end of the day, I just prioritize wearing turtlenecks over my comfort. Um, so that was something I had to make the decision of doing and no, but back home, like I, I wear turtlenecks, you know, go to church. If I go out and, and, you know, go to Boston or whatever. And so it's, it's kind of a regular occurrence for me to rock a turtleneck. How long have you been wearing turtlenecks? Like they, they definitely, they got back in vote,

like on my season of The Bachelor, there's a couple of memes out there of me wearing a turtleneck. And I, I've told this story before story before but Carrie the stylist for The Bachelor was you know insistent he's like they're coming back now how long like have you or has this been your whole life or is this the past couple years that you're like you know what it's coming back I'm gonna get ahead of this trend and I'm gonna be a trendsetter. It's a great turtleneck debate. So I have pictures when I was like three or four with turtlenecks on. And I think that's where the love for turtlenecks came about.

And I got to credit my mom. I kind of still matter for my name, but I got to credit her for the turtlenecks. And I took a break from turtlenecks for maybe like seven or eight to 24, 25. But over the past, yeah, I would say over the past like five or six years, I've been rocking turtlenecks. And since I did live in L.A. for almost four years, I've been back in Massachusetts. Yeah, I lived right in North Hollywood. But since I've been back for the past couple of years, I've been rocking the turtlenecks just about every other day because it's freezing for six months and I got to cover my neck up, make sure my neck's warm. This is my most favorite conversation we've ever had with a bachelor guest ever.

You guys are like, we got what we need, aren't we? Before COVID, I mean, I know I think you recently interviewed with Rachel. So, you know, I don't know if you got into the great turtleneck debate with her. You know, we try to deliver some new content on the Vile Files. But do you find the turtleneck to be a conversation starter with women at the bar? Because I got to assume there's not a lot of guys in the bar wearing a turtleneck. And when people, you know know you just want to give people an in like how do i oh god he's so handsome he's intimidating how do i approach this guy

you know what i'm gonna ask about the turtleneck do you find that to be the case or or or too intimidating you know what unfortunately i think more uh guys approach me more if i'm at a bar or whatnot and be like dude nice turtleneckleneck, bro, where'd you get it? And I'm like, you know, go check out like Zara or Top Man or reasonably priced turtlenecks. H&M, man. Yeah, H&M will do it. But, yeah, I mean, for the most part, girls will –

I definitely see that they acknowledge the turtleneck and they give me the head nod like nice turtleneck, but they're not always approaching me to try to inquire about whatever. The hard-hitting questions that we hear on the bio files. Seriously, my favorite comment. I see that you're wearing like a lighter, like this is more a lighter, a linen turtleneck. Do you ever go sweater turtleneck or is that too hot? No, no, I do. I do. And that was my plan for the holidays for Christmas or Christmas Eve to go with a heavier, bulkier turtleneck. And I do have a few of those. Yeah, so I like

the sleek look for sure. But for Christmas, when I'm with my family, I'm definitely going to go with the bulkier. I think a white turtleneck. I also think like – It's festive. Correct me if I'm wrong, but I think there's a 100% chance. Have you ever been to an ugly Christmas sweater party? I have. Have you worn – did you wear a turtleneck with an ugly sweater vest over the turtleneck?

Right? I feel like that's the look. No, that's a great idea. Next party I go to, ugly Christmas sweater party, I'm going to consider that. But literally every time I go to, which has been like three times in my life, I've gone to an ugly Christmas sweater party. which has been like three times in my life, I've gone to an ugly Christmas sweater party. But I want to wear something more fashionable,

but then I'm like, okay, I have to wear some silly Christmas sweater. But that's a great idea. I'm going to think of that next party. Do that and then tag me in the photo and I'll give you some credit. Going back to, if you will indulge us a little bit, your time on the show, did you, like, how much, you know, because the show and they obviously are going to lean in to our fears and insecurities at times,

did you ever, were you struggling the whole time with this engagement because as you know as you mentioned rather you kind of came in very green to the show some people have been fans of the show and they've watched it even guys myself when i uh went on i i hadn't watched the show but I had I burned through like two seasons that I bought just to like figure it out and understand it at what point did it become like evident to you that holy oh shit like okay an engagement's on the line and then when you realize that obviously you and Tayshia had some sort of connection at what point were you starting to struggle with it? And did you ever, was there ever a point that you thought maybe I could do this or was it a, was it a challenge

the whole time? Yeah. Yeah. Um, so I think truthfully with, um, you know, my first couple of days on the show, uh, with, with Claire there and obviously not, you know, establishing any connection whatsoever. I was like, oh, yeah, I mean, first and foremost, she doesn't like me whatsoever. I don't think I could do this. You know, I was doing all these sorts of crazy dates and I was like, all right, you know, this is what this is going to be. But then Tayshia came and and like I've said a million times, she is 1000% more my speed, my type. And the first night I spoke with her, I was like, okay, this could be something that she's beautiful. She's amazing, gentle, sweet, like her personality matches up perfectly with mine. So as the days went on, and I got that first one on one date, I was like, holy crap, I could actually do this.

This this could be something like I left that date glowing. Like this is the last thing I expected from this experience to really this quickly have feelings for for the bachelorette. quickly have feelings for for the bachelorette um truthfully like i'm like going into this i'm gonna see if i can see if i can establish feelings see if they can grow to a strong enough level where i where i can propose and i don't know if i can do that and uh after the one-on-one date i was like wow this could actually be something um but then i had that one the privilege of having the first one-on-one date and then she obviously was going on dates with other guys and establishing connections with other guys. Um, so that was obviously strange for me.

I knew what the concept of the show was, of course, but, um, that was strange for me. Obviously something I had never dealt with, you know, the girl I like, um, talking to dating, kissing other guys so as the days went on after my one-on-one date I'm like okay I'm still I still have doubts I'm still unsure but the overriding theme was from all the guys and even the producers is one day here one day on the show is like a week, a month in real time. And it's so concentrated and you have to move so fast. So what I was so hopeful about was that tomorrow would do what it needed to do to make my feelings strong enough and at the level it needed to be to propose.

And I really was just looking for the the the hometowns and and fantasy suite and obviously certain dates or whatever um as those moments to bring me to that next level and and of course it never happened unfortunately well um i i'm sorry to hear that it didn't happen but i guess the follow-up question of that is even though i know you mentioned that you know in the real world maybe you would have had more time do you have any regrets uh in terms of how things played out despite maybe thinking you know hey this is how you met taisha this is what life dealt the two of you or and you kind of accept that and will learn from it or or do you find that maybe oh shit man like what if i took a leap of faith you know and uh in let's say decided to get engaged and who knows zach and taisha are seem very happy and and you know you were only one part of this equation

so taisha let's assume would have ended up picking Zach anyways, right? But let's just play a different game where you're the one. Do you think, looking back, you could have taken that leap of faith and even if it didn't work out, have no regrets about the situation? Where do you kind of feel about it now with the benefit of hindsight? Yeah, with the benefit of hindsight, I definitely ask myself what if all the time and even my family talking to my family, they're like, Tayshia had every quality that you can imagine that you would be looking for in a wife. And, you know, physically, she's obviously beautiful. And, you know, we definitely had that emotional, physical connection that I that I certainly felt in the moment and seemed to be undeniable watching it back.

opened up a little bit more and I allowed it to, uh, that, that beautiful love story to, to kind of come to fruition where, um, no question about it. I, I self-sabotaged the situation and, and, you know, coming off of, you know, I've been, uh, divorced, you know, for three years now or so. Um, and, you know, it was a really, really hard time for me and, and, um, you know, for three years now or so. And, you know, it was a really, really hard time for me. And, you know, was definitely a lot of moments where, like, am I ever going to get married again? Am I ever going to, you know, fall in love again and give someone my heart? And, but what makes me feel a little bit better about the situation is I feel like what was meant to happen happened. Watching back Zach and Tasha and what I would never have wanted to go into an engagement with any doubt whatsoever. Never mind some of the glaring doubt and concern that I had going into,

you know, the fantasy suite portion of the whole journey. And just knowing how into and in love Zach was with Taysha and seemed to the mutual love they had for each other. Yeah. Say she would have chosen Zach anyway, but if I, you know, ended that whole journey where it was me and Tayshia, and knowing that I had even 1% of doubt about the whole thing, you know, I probably couldn't live with myself knowing that she may have missed out on the opportunity of falling in madly in love with this guy who completely loves her in every way.

So for that, I'm grateful in how it played out, and I feel like it was meant to be. I'd be remiss, and I feel like my audience would want to know, and we wish Tayshia and Zach nothing but the best, and we're going to assume that they will be one of the success stories of Bachelor Nation. However, would you ever consider reconnecting with with taisha a year from now if you've both found yourself to be a signal single in the real world would you or or let's say taisha

reached out to you would you entertain a a date with taisha oh yeah yeah i absolutely would 100 and uh and i know this isn't like great to say to say as a former bachelorette contestant, but that whole, the whole environment of it, and I completely would be honest and open, like, I was just uncomfortable. You know, the majority of the time where all the other guys seem to be like, you know, all in it at every moment they were like and i'm like okay this is this is awkward for me this is uncomfortable this is not how um and a lot of the guys were either really good at adapting or really good at faking that that a lot of this was um did you feel like you were almost like taking yeah did you almost feel

like you're taking crazy pills where it's just like, why am I the only one who thinks this is kind of fucked up, guys? You know, like where everyone else is like, this is awesome. Totally normal. Like, did you ever have that thought? and over again, regardless of the outcome and the guys I met and obviously meeting Taysha and having that time with her was amazing. But yeah, you know, I'm like, am I missing something here? This is like super uncomfortable. And I know my personality, I'm a little more reserved and, and a little more, you know, to myself and, you know, expressing yourself and going on these dates and all that stuff on national tv of course is something i've never done before and it was unique but um yeah i'm like okay these guys are really like pros at adapting to this crazy new world because i'm it's taking me a little bit more time than it seems like some of these other guys

who who are some of the guys that you just from your perspective just your opinion yeah thought might be faking it or indulging a little bit more than uh you believed who did you not buy oh man um i probably shouldn't say any names but i guess i'll do it. I mean, and again, all these guys are great guys. I'll preface that by saying they're solid, solid dudes. But I think right off the bat, great guy chasing my man, but he had no intentions of like falling in love. falling in love uh and and he was he was there to um you know have a great time have a once in a lifetime experience which a lot of us were as well but um i love i love ed to death ed you know not in a million years would would he was the funniest guy in the world but he would have never actually fallen in love uh with someone um you know noah great guy you know great kid funny kid but um and who else uh what about Bennett what do you think what do you think about Bennett I'm I'm honestly truly on the fence with Bennett I haven't quite figured him out I hope I have an opportunity to meet him

and talk to him in person but uh did you find him to be what did you find him to be – what did you find Bennett to be? What was your read on Bennett? Yeah, I mean, Bennett and I honestly spoke three words together in the two months, you know, we're a month and a half out with him in Palm Springs where it was like I was super close to the majority of the guys and even like a guy like Riley who wasn't the most talkative, like we were fairly close. guys and even like a guy like Riley who wasn't the most talkative like we were fairly close but Bennett um you know a really solid guy very very smart very intellectual seemed to be very successful uh we just had nothing to relate on uh as far as like to talk about a conversation

starter um he was a good guy and he got along with a lot of the guys, but they were definitely the way he was portrayed on TV. There were definitely aspects of that that were very true where he, you know, he had moments where he would get in tips where I would be talking and, you know, maybe I wasn't as eloquent as he was or, you know, had this amazing life altering thing to say to the group. But I don't know what it was. I've never like confronted him about it. But I'd be talking and I'd see him out of the corner of my eye, like smiling, laughing, looking at someone else. And I'm like, dude, I'm talking like and and he would do that to some, a lot of the other guys. I don't know if he was just had something in his head or he was making fun of us. I don't know, but he definitely thought very, very highly of himself as he should. He's a handsome, successful, you know, six, three former football player.

6'3", former football player, he should be confident, but he probably could have sprinkled a little humbleness in there as well. Humility in there as well, yeah. That's interesting to hear. Thank you for sharing

your honest take on the guys. I'm going to beat my ass next time I see them. Also, thank you for saying that about Chasen. Okay. Yeah, no, he was a good guy, but he was there. I don't do it. That doesn't surprise me about Chasen.

I just didn't get what seemed to be people losing their mind over you know whatever it was he smoke show or you know just seemed like it just like a bizarre fight or a weird thing for ed to to care so much about yeah yeah i think ed uh no one else cared in the slightest like truthfully no one else cared at all we're more focused on tshia, but I think Ed knew, you know, Ed kind of knew what he had to do to kind of stay on

the show a little bit longer, and he took it closer. You know, something to be said about knowing your role. Right. Ed seemed to know his. How did you end up on the show i don't know if you answered this already but i'm curious yeah yeah it was basically uh reached out to by producers from the show and um it all happened so fast they reached out to me and um i was like okay yeah i

mean this this sounds cool. This sounds fun. And then they're like, all right, you have this interview and this meeting. You have to do this test within a couple weeks. And I was just like, okay, okay. Did all that. And then got a call within a month that I was going to be on the show. Like, you're going to be in Palm Springs in 10 days or something. So, yeah, it was was craziness a whirlwind of

like I told my family like three days before I left because I didn't know if it was actually going to happen or whatever so um yeah and then I popped up in Palm Springs having not the slightest idea what I what I was about to get myself into so are you are you still a roofer do you still like I was so taken I've I was a fan of like when, when, you know, it was such a weird season with, with Claire being the bachelorette that we just didn't get to know any of you

guys while Dale was there because it was just a Claire and Dale show that, you know, other than night one where you guys came out of limo, but like even reading your bios, I, I was always like you and Ivan were two guys that like I was drawn to immediately just because you know Ivan the chess intro and he's this aeronautical I can't even pronounce it engineer

and then here you are the roofer but like you you you know wear turtlenecks and you know maybe I also like it just uh I'm drawn to other handsome men with curly hair but um you you seem as if this gentle soft caring nurturing soul and a roofer is one of the hardest jobs in the world to do and i'm just could you give us a little backstory that's something you still do it sounds like you came out to la you've done some modeling and and stuff in entertainment Like what do you do now? Give us some little background on yourself. Yeah, so my dad came here. I'll give you the – we got time?

We got a little time? We got time, buddy. My dad came here from Portugal when he was 17 or 18 and went to high school, all that good stuff, graduated, met my mom, started painting. And then I've been painting, you know, painting with him. And, and then with one of my other uncles and my, my brother, me and my brother have been painting for, for 20 plus years now. And then slowly transitioned into roofing. So it's with one of my other uncles. And in Massachusetts, where I'm at, like you're either working in Boston, a corporate job,

or you're doing some type of labor job. So I do have to say it is not shingle roofing, where you're up on the side of roof, hammering and shingles we do just fix leaks on like big commercial buildings so it's not the most tedious thing in the world um but it is hard work we're out there in the summer in the winter you know freezing uh 20 degrees in the winter that i've been experiencing lately but um it's actually something i really enjoy it's i work with my brother and my cousin and my uncle and and and, um, you know, we, we, uh, not the most riveting conversation in the world, but yeah, we, we go in and fix leaks and like town halls, schools, um, you know, a classroom that water will be pouring in

from rain from the roof and we come to save the day. So, uh, I like to think I to think i'm allowing children to learn essentially you're like dude you're fortunate no you don't no no it's great no the people justin would have melted with that yeah yeah brent brent and people we want people we want to know you you know we there's there's more to you than just uh the guy who who who got divorced and is scared to to not make it work out uh it's what do you paint i paint a little bit myself i don't know if you've ever seen bob ross uh but uh i've been known to do a bob ross painting now and then okay are you painting houses i grew up with bob ross i am. Yeah, I guess I should have clearly said I'm not painting artistically.

Painting houses and painting. I know. I'm sorry. It's still great. Still great. Still great. I was like, maybe we can paint together. Yeah.

I mean, if you can draw it, I'll fill in the... Okay. I have a steady hand, I guess. There you go. Yeah, you do. hand, I guess. There you go. Yeah, you do. But, um, but I guess, you know, my, my artistic expression, I guess is, uh, is I do, you know, I definitely model a decent amount in Boston and New York and, and did that in LA for, for a little while. Um, so it works out really well for me. I work with my family. So whenever I have a modeling job, can go do that in boston or even drive to new york or

fly wherever um and and i have a lot of friends who like to make cool videos and and are you know have their own uh form of artistic expression that that we can all collaborate and do cool things and and um yeah it's fun it's a good balance for me. I work working on the roof, being with my family and doing, you know, my form of art as well, I guess. Awesome. So as someone, you know, you mentioned self-sabotage, you have you've been divorced. Like, where do you stand now on the on the on the topic? everyone talks about this experience being really therapeutic. It's reflective. And then you get this bizarre opportunity to watch yourself back, right? So like first you live the therapeutic ride and then you watch the therapeutic ride. Do you think the show has maybe freed you up from that burden of fear of taking a risk in the future? Because, you know, as someone who, you know, I haven't been married

and divorced, but, you know, I was engaged long before I ever went on the show. And then, you know, if you watch the show, you certainly know my history on the show. And as someone who grew up in a very traditional household and saw my parents being in love, you know, their whole lives and having this rock solid marriage and wanting to emulate that and then feeling, you know, their whole lives and having this rock solid marriage and wanting to emulate that and then feeling, you know, especially when my first engagement didn't work out the shame and disappointment of it not working out. Do you feel like that burden has been lifted? Because like, you just never know, like you just whenever you fall in love next, you just you can't predict the future. And at some point, you're going to have to take a risk, right?

Um, where do you, where do you land on that now? Yeah, I think, uh, definitely the, the show was, uh, as much as it was an amazing experience and, and, um, you know, trying to fall in love with this beautiful woman. It was, yeah, a time in my life where, you know, I had to self-reflect every single day and definitely discover things about myself. And a long two-month therapy session, you could say. And, you know, in hindsight, looking back at that experience and where I am today, I think I'm definitely taking steps and hopefully leaps towards being closer to that and being closer to having the ability to completely give my heart to someone. And it's still going to be scary and it's still going to be challenging. And I'm certainly going to have to take that leap of faith, regardless. And I know the first time around for me, proposing and getting married, I had no doubt

at all. And I was like, this is exactly what I'm supposed to be doing. This is with the woman I'm supposed to spend the rest of my life with. And then it just didn't work out. So not all the time, like how you feel prior is always going to solidify the, the, you know, longevity and how healthy the relationship is going to be. It just has to work out. Two people obviously have to do what they need to do every single day to invest in the relationship to make it work. So it's going to be a leap of faith for me without a doubt the next time around. But I definitely feel a little more free and I feel like a burden is kind of taken off my back a little bit just knowing that, you know, I've taken steps towards being a better person, being a potentially a better husband. And in doing that, more so me being ready for that. So yeah, it's, and I won't know until I'm in that situation. I won't know

until I've met that person and I'm ready to get down on one knee. But without a doubt, I feel like I'm taking steps towards being the best version of myself and certainly being able to give the best version of myself to another woman. Yeah, well, I appreciate you sharing. And not that you're asking, but I would just offer you the advice of Yeah, just just go for it, man. Like, don't don't what kill you know know what they say, like what won't kill you will make you stronger. Uh, it's not a reflection of you in any way. If you take another leap of faith and don't get that one, that one right either. Um, so, you know, we can only control, you know, a hundred percent of our half. So I hope that, I hope that you were able to continue

on this journey and, and not put so much pressure on yourself when on this path of, of, uh, finding, uh, your, your person. Um, speaking of finding your person, how, how have those DMS been doing you? I feel like, uh, it's been a really positive week for you in terms of attention you've received. Is it, is it as overwhelming as I imagine it would be for you? Yeah, yeah, the DMs are definitely live and active right now but it's, yeah, I don't even know how to approach that. I wouldn't even, I've never been like a DM type of dude where like I'm gonna see what the deal is online. I would proceed with caution, yeah.

I would not, yeah. Tell Justin to stop bothering you it's fine yeah other than justin you can reply to justin what he did no no um and and uh you know i guess what um it's never been my my method my forte to to i really i you know need to like meet a woman and establish feelings and get to know her and whatever and i'm not like hey i'm gonna dm you and and uh let's hook up and then let's i've just never been that way um so yeah i don't even know i wouldn't even know where to start in responding to to any of these these girls and most of them are like 10 plus years younger than me.

And it just, yeah, you know. So I'm going to kind of lay off the DMs for a while and just try to live my life and ignore that part of, you know, the whatever, the outside things that happen along with doing this and being a part of this. I am supposed to let you know that Andrea Russett, do you know who Andrea Russett is? I love Andrea Russett.

No, I don't. She is a rather popular personality on YouTube, but also a very talented musician who I personally think will be a super pop star soon. She's a fan. She would appreciate you saying hello. and if you ever are back in la maybe we can set up a get together if you want her number i'm happy to give it i love this journey i love andrea russett she's amazing okay she's uh

asked me to set you up and i said i can make that happen i said you probably don't need my help and then right before we started this conversation i i asked if it would be okay to to say this on the show and she said 100 i will owe you i will owe you for eternity if i if i make this happen so um i don't know, I don't know what I need or want from Andrea, but I always like people owing me for the rest of their life. So if you could, if you could try to make that work, uh, Brendan, and she's a, she's a lovely, beautiful woman and, and again, quite talented. So, you know, hitch, hitch your wagon to that train. Cause it's taken off.

No. Yeah. I'm 100 percent down. So yeah, however, however, figure that out. Obviously, I you know, you guys said amazing things about her, but, you know, got to obviously see what she looks like first. But, you know, I know she's a tree ever. She's been around for so long. She's she's amazing. Yeah. Before I. Yeah, that's a question. Yeah. Can I ask a question? Yes, please.

I want to know what his niece thought of, like, you not picking Tayshia. Like, you saying no. Yeah. She – so it was such a crazy thing for my niece to – you know, because she's obviously met my ex-wife and ex-girlfriend and whatever. And so she's, uh, meeting this other girl and I haven't brought many girls around whatsoever, but, um, you know, it was like, she, she had that moment of hugging Tasha and then didn't, had no idea what to expect, uh, and what it would bring. Um, but when I came home, uh, and, and they were like, all right,

when I came home and kind of told them what happened, they're like okay yeah you did you did what you thought was best and and then um now like at the end of this they're like dude what is wrong with you you know why didn't you like taisha is so amazing she's so beautiful and perfect and whatever and but my niece um yeah she we haven't really i haven't sat her down and like had that conversation about like did I screw up or not Aaliyah like tell me but she was just so enthralled with like being on the show

and having that experience but it reminded me like when I was on in My Sister Bella definitely kind of remnants of that and she she carried the uh the torch quite well uh of uh young very dynamic personality yeah potential potential future bachelorette so i'm sure oh yeah no and she really is like so she really like since she was a little girl she

you know wanted to be like some some disney star or you know she's she's she can sing and she thinks she's a little actress too and so she had her moment she was like you know all uh completely uh you know amazed by it so that's awesome uh before we let you go uh brendan i want to play this game called do you know Me? It's a fun game, real simple. It's an opportunity for our audience to get to know a little bit more of you outside of the show. They are just kind of fun, random, silly questions. Chris and I are going to guess the answer. So when I ask you, you know, does Brendan, has he ever done this?

Has he ever done that? Think about it. Don't answer it right away. Let us guess. Okay. And then if you have an anecdotal story that goes with any of these answers, feel free to share and elaborate

and tell us a story about yourself or not. It's up to you. If it's a simple yes or no, that's totally fine as well. They're all over the board. Some of them are a little risque and some of them are super easy. We'll start off with a softball.

Do you know me? With Bren Dan. Safe way of saying it. And honestly, I'm on my head about it. I'm never going to be 100% confident I'm saying it right. Just call me B. Just call me B. B?

Yeah. Thank you. God, kind of weighed off my shoulders. Question number one does brandon currently have lip balm with him does brandon currently have lip i'm gonna say yes he's it's winter it's dry in the northeast uh i i this is a man who wears turtlenecks. He's not going to neglect those lips. Like in his pocket? On his person. I don't, you know, he's interviewing, like, let's just say,

do you regularly carry lip balm of some sort around with you during wintertime in a coat, in a pocket, whatever? I'm going to go. He just kind of walked away, so I'm going to say yes. He had it. He did. He had it right there. I have two on my person at all times.

I would have been shocked if the answer was no. Yeah, no, I have Chapstick with me and applying it all the time throughout the day, in the middle of the night 24 7 so all right question number two another softball before we get into the hard-hitting questions does brendan prefer white wine over red i'm gonna say no he's a red anyone who drink has a turtleneck drinks red wine. I'm going to agree with you. Over white.

So can I say neither? We want to know you, Brendan. Yeah, I'm not a big wine guy. I'm not a big beer guy. What's your drink of choice, if any? If I am drinking, I'll definitely go with tequila or gin. And, yeah, I try to keep it classy. And, you know, I'm not Bennett with the martinis,

but I try to, you know, keep it classy with those two. Speaking of classy, question number three. Has Brendan used a condom in the past month? I love that it made him giggle. I'm so nervous. I'm going to say no, but I want it to be yes. Also, we are very safe sex positive. And so I mean, when I i say classy condoms are classy

i'm gonna say no as well uh i have not oh god in the past month um you know but still uh trying to keep it classy regardless. Question number four. We're staying hot. We're staying in the bedroom. Has Brendan ever used a sex toy on himself or with someone else? Oh, my God. Let his niece listen to this. She's not going to listen to this.

Oh, my God. This is not rated 10-year-old. I know. No, she's not going to listen to this. Oh, my God. This is not rated 10-year-old. I know. How old is Brandon again? How old is Brandon? I just turned 31. Okay.

I'm going to say yes. Yeah, I'm going to say yes. At some point, he's used a sex toy. At some point, he's used a sex toy. I can neither confirm or deny. There may or may not have been one in and around the mix at some point. We're a sex-positive show here, Brendan, so we're just going to take that as a hard yes. I certainly haven't used it on myself.

Well, you're missing out. It may have floated into certain moments. I'm not sure. I can't. As I like to say, and as you may know as a roofer, sometimes it takes more than one tool to complete a task. Exactly. There's nothing wrong with that. You need the right tool for the job,

and the tool changes at certain points. That's why we have two belts, right? The hard-hitting questions here on the podcast. Next question. Has Brendan ever paid for a psychic reading? I'm going to change it and just say, have you ever received

a psychic reading that wasn't on a reality TV show? I'm going to say yes. He lived in L.A. for a period of time. I think at some point you've had some sort of horoscope or psychic reading performed for you, and you are an introspective person,

so you played along and indulged in uh said psychic reading i'm just gonna say no i don't think he has so three years ago i would have obviously this would have been a no no for sure but i've never paid for one but friends i've met along the way, it wasn't, I don't know, I don't know how to exactly describe what it was. I have never been to like a psychic shop and they told me my future, but I've had friends that I've met over the past few years that have like pulled cards and read whatever, or different symbols that meant this. And like, exactly like you said, Nick, I just played along and one of my close friends is like, um, Nick, I just played along. So I nailed it. Like a tarot card.

One of my close friends is like, yeah, you're doing good. You're going to be fine. You're going to be fine. Like reading all these cards. Oh, that's good. And I'm like, okay. But I appreciate whatever he saw, I guess, in the future. Can Brendan name five types of flowers?

You can't say a rose. Wait, what was that question again? Can Brendan name five types of flowers? Yes. I'm going to say yes. Jesus. Sunflower. Lilac.

Sure. Lily. Okay. I can't. Daisy. Tulip. Daisy. Tulips. Not good with putting on the thoughts type question.

I don't know. I guess I can't. No. All right. Has Brendan ever peed their pants? Ever. Yes. Ever.

Like even as a kid? Yeah, sure. I mean. Oh, then for sure. Oh, yeah. No question. When was the last time you pe the old pants there um there's too many to count and uh no but when i was uh when i was between like eight and nine years old i I definitely had a problem wetting my bed and my poor mother every night just

had a fresh pair of sheets on deck ready to change them because I just, you know, I couldn't control myself, couldn't hold it in. I had a pee in the pants period of my time myself between the ages of, I'm going to say four and five years old. Okay. I was a little old okay i was a little old i was a little older um let me that's okay i might have been might have been six i might have been six uh i used to like i i would i was too lazy to go to the bathroom i'd be out playing and i just like and then i'd like laugh and then i'd pee my pants and my sisters i remember i have a

vivid memory of hiding behind the rabbit cage we had a rabbit cage because my sisters told on me and i was like i thought maybe my dad wouldn't find me or somehow i got i got caught quite the over shares final question um and remember brendan we are a sex positive show here as bre Has Brendan ever had sex on a first date? And I don't mean one night stand, which would count. Oh. But it could be just a date that was set up and he had a lovely time. Not like a hookup from the bar?

That would count. Okay. But also, it's not exclusive to a hookup at a bar. It could just be Brendan the Closer. Brendan the Closer. Yes. Yeah. Yeah.

Yes. I'm going to say no. You're going to say no um you're gonna say no what that i uh i've i've never uh a girl that i've gone on dates with uh never been intimate on the first night no okay i think i believe you a gentle man. Gentle man. Brendan, I can't thank you enough for taking the time. It's been a ton of fun. Sorry for butchering your name so many times.

But I look forward to having the opportunity to meet you in person. Don't forget to reach out to Andrea Russett. That's R-U-S-S-E-T-T. Russett. Andrea Russett. Andrea Russett. Okay. Look her up on the gram.

Okay. And I wish you nothing but the best. And I can't wait to find out what your love story is. Oh, if they ask you at a paradise, are you open to going? I don't know. I don't know. Honestly? I don't know. I don't know.

Honestly, I don't know if I would definitely consider it, but I don't know if, you know, I could truly like build feelings for someone in such a short amount of time as the show requires. So it would be something I'd really have to consider. I'm not sure. Or the answer is no because you're going to be living your best life with andrea russet yeah so if you're not if you're not dating andrea if you aren't dating andrea brendan i i you should go you should absolutely say yes uh don't get in your head just go have fun with your friends on the beach meet some great people and you just never know a lot a lot less pressure on the beach it's a great time and i i really

think everyone who's given the opportunity should say yes so that's my two cents on it and you never know you never know what could happen yeah um you can meet a great lady and and uh and you can date you you you don't even have to get engaged if you don't want to although i'm sure they would quite love that and i'm sure neil would be thrilled to set you up with ring oh i do have i i have one question i'm sorry if you can indulge me so many people were just like oh what a cruel a cruel thing to have Neil Lane be on the date. And I personally thought to myself, this is not a big deal. Brennan's a big guy. I mean, I personally thought that was kind of a gift to set you up in terms of to help explain your reservations that you had.

I didn't feel like you were really having cold sweats because you're, you know, or am I wrong about that? Did you find it to be a torturous date or was it just more or less a metaphor for what you were about to do in terms of expressing your reluctance with, with Tasha? Yeah, it definitely was, uh, you know, watching it back more of a metaphor of like especially with neil's in the way he expressed uh the importance of this engagement ring and how much it means and um you know this means forever and all that good stuff the amazing eloquent way he he put it all um the the date was was fun it was It was great spending time with Tayshia. You know, it definitely made the moment, you know, more serious for me.

But it wasn't like I was the whole time like, you know, oh, my God, like, you know, cold sweats, like miserable, scared, frightened. You know, it was we had a fun day. like miserable, scared, frightened. You know, it was, we had a fun day. It was just, yeah, in a sense, it allowed people to understand in the way it was edited and everything and cut that, yeah, it was, you know, it was no joke.

It was an important, you know, life altering decision that I was going to make, and that kind of gave it a little more importance, I guess, that date. Gotcha. That's what I thought, but I'm glad you were able to confirm that because I wouldn't want people thinking that you have cold sweats any time you run into a jeweler. I feel like you are.

I think you can handle it um but uh i i'm glad to hear that uh thanks again buddy uh everyone listening go go follow uh brendan on instagram check out his uh journey of life and we wish you nothing but the best and uh if it's not with andrea we certainly hope to see you on the beach. And have a very wonderful new year, buddy. I hope it's wonderful. Thank you so much. Thank you so much for having me, guys. I appreciate it.

Say hi to Justin for me. I will. Tell him to slide into my DM. He's there on the East Coast. Maybe you guys can connect. I know. I couldn't drive up i personally will be i personally will be kind of pissed off and jealous if you guys become friends more than because i'm quite frankly like i think justin i really hit it off podcast wise and

i don't know if justin knows this but like I'm really trying to be best friends with Justin and like I feel like he likes me and I think we're built we have we're building on something but I feel it's a bit one-sided on my end so like I'll be really like I'm definitely the pursuer here like he's fine so you're the Justin to the Brent you're the Justin to the Brendan in that relationship yeah so you know how sometimes friends like will be friends and then they'll introduce you to like the and then all of a sudden those two people become better friends i'll be really butthurt if that happens with you and justin but uh i don't know i feel like justin and i like we didn't even say much to each other. We just like, we connected. You had a connection.

Yeah. That's what worries me. Yeah. That's what worries me, you know, and here I am the odd man out. I'll be really bummed, but well, have a very happy new year. Thank you for being so gracious with your time and we wish you nothing but the best and take care buddy thank you so much guys, happy new year, happy holidays

thank you thank you guys all for listening, we appreciate we appreciate Brendan for his time don't forget to subscribe, rate us 5 stars go ahead and check out Monday's episode of Ask Nick where we give and hear a bunch of relationship stories and advice

and try to learn about love life and relationships all together on our Ask Nick episodes of The Vile Files. And if nothing else, I hope you guys have an absolute wonderful new year. Let's finish 2020 strong and flush down the toilet. Everyone watch Dick Clark's New Year's Rockin' Eve. Watch Dick Clark's New Year's Rockin' Eve because Chrissy has been truly bleeding and crying over producing that show, and we are proud of her.

So be sure to check that out. And what a year, guys. What a year of the Vile Files. Can't thank you enough for supporting the show. And other than that, we will see you on Monday.