The Viall Files - E223 Getting Deep With Ivan Hall

Episode Date: January 13, 2021

Ivan Hall joins us on today’s episode of The Viall Files for a more in depth conversation about who he really is and what we did not get to see on The Bachelorette. Ivan speaks passionately about prison reform, dating and religion, why he was so surprised to see his brother on the show, and what he really does for a living. Even though we are diving deep with Ivan, Nick and Ivan get do get playful talking about possible paradise scenarios and playing our game Do You Know Me.  “ I’m in a place where I want to settle down but I don’t want to force it. “ Please make sure to subscribe so you don’t miss an episode and as always send in your relationship questions to [e-mail] to be a part of our Monday episodes.  THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSORS: HighKey: http://www.highkey.com/FILES to get 15% off your order  Function of Beauty: http://functionofbeauty.com/VIALL to get 20% off your order.  Better Help: http://betterhelp.com/VIALLFILES to get 10% off your first month.  Episode Socials:  @viallfiles @nickviall @ivanbhall See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

What's going on everybody? Welcome to another episode of The Volf House. I am your host, Nick, joined by my producer Chrissy. We got the social media syndicate. One in studio, one virtual. We're a growing team.

We're a growing team. I like this idea that we don't have our social security. I keep saying social security. I don't know. The social media syndicate. We're not mic'd up yet. We don't know. The social media syndicate. We're not mic'd up yet. We don't know if we will. Maybe we will.

They're a mystery right now. They're a mystery right now. You see the product of all of their efforts. Who are they? We want to thank Northwestern for training them up. For sponsoring. A couple of Northwestern grads. Thank you, Northwesternern for sponsoring our team.

We have a great, a great guest here today. One Ivan. Some of you may have had the opportunity to hear him on one of, not more of the other podcasts he's been on. But we are glad that Ivan was able to connect with us. And hopefully you find this uh conversation with ivan to be a little different than what you've uh heard from

some of the other conversations that he's had so uh i i loved it i think he's great um glad i got an opportunity to get to know him more and uh this conversation really was about just getting to know ivan the person and not so much the person on the show. So hopefully you find this to be enjoyable. I know I had a great time talking to him. You guys are super similar. You guys had the same kind of take on a lot of things, which I thought was kind of interesting, actually. Your brain works similar, I think.

Yeah, I think our brains work similar. Our brain works similar, I think. Yeah, I think our brains work similar. You know, it was nice to talk to him about, obviously, we dived a little bit more into the conversation about his faith or religion. And, you know, we're different in that regard where I grew up, you know, very religious and I'm still religious to this day. I have, you know, like more questions like when you're younger. I think for me, it's kind of like well you just this is how it is it's just more blind faith and now i find myself to be poking holes uh and the things that i was was taught but um i think the important thing when talking about ivan is uh

especially when it comes to that topic is you know's okay in a dating situation if you don't have the same beliefs as someone. And that might mean it won't work out, but sometimes people who aren't religious feel kind of shame and guilt for bringing that up in a situation. And it was nice to have that conversation with Ivan. And we get that in Ask Nick a lot too. So it's kind of interesting to hear his take on it. For sure. Being in that situation. Well, too. So it's kind of interesting to hear his take on it. For sure.

Being in that situation. Well, let's not spoil any more of the Ivan interview, but I think we just get right to it. Don't forget to send your questions at asknick at castme.com. Cast with a K. Make sure to join us every Monday when we do our Ask Nick episodes, giving some great advice to some really fun callers. And we all learn a little about ourselves and relationships. And we will be back on

Monday with that, obviously our recaps, and we'll just be pumping out more entertaining content for you. Thanks for sticking with us. Be sure to give us a follow on the old gram, vile files on Instagram. Well, because our committee, our syndicate is working hard on entertaining you with social media stuff. It's a lot of fun. Anyhow, anything else? Should we just get to it?

Let's get to it. Ivan, thanks so much for joining us. Of course. I'm glad to be here. Well, I guess to get started, how are you doing? We're in a new year. It's obviously been a few weeks since the end of the season finale and obviously a couple months removed from your time filming the show. How's it going for Ivan? It's going great. I, you know, yeah, it's been some time since I left the show. And now that it's over, I actually feel a sigh of relief. I'll say it's been a couple of weeks. So that's nice. And then my nephew was just born recently. So I was very excited about that on January 1st. So I got a text from my brother.

Thank you. Thank you. Yeah. New Year's Eve. I got a text from him. He said, the baby's coming. And it was two weeks early, actually. So it was a really, it was a surprise for us all. But yeah, everything's really good. I'm keeping it real low key, you know, COVID and stuff. And yeah, it's, everything's really good so far. I love the reception I'm getting from everybody in Bachelor Nation and whatnot. So it's been really nice. And you mentioned it feels like a relief. Why? Just because there's like that anxiety of like, oh, what's going to be shown?

How do I look here? All that kind of stuff. And I've had that pretty much every episode, especially like actually episode one. I was my anxiety was off the wall. I had to just go outside and breathe for a little bit because I was like I can't believe this is happening it was kind of crazy and then yeah and then I guess at the finale there and how all that would be shown and stuff is was kind of the other thing that was in the back of my mind too so but yeah I'm kind of just glad it's all done because there's you know there's just a lot of judgment and you know criticism on how

things should be done and how I how me and Taysha are together and all that kind of stuff, which is, which is fine with me. And it doesn't bother me really much at all, but it is just a lot. I'm only asking because I'm almost surprised, and maybe it's unfair to assume this, but you come across as poised, grounded, and yet you've talked about anxiety. I mean, forgive me for assuming you would not be someone who would suffer from any type of anxiety. Is that something you deal with or just more specific to the show?

Because I mean, I get anxiety a lot, but like, is that something that you get? No, not really at all, honestly. So I think your assumptions are right. But yeah, in regards to the show, I definitely had some anxiety. I think the biggest one did come from the whole religion thing because i don't ever talk about religion at all pretty much um and like nobody knows i'm not religious and living in dallas and the bible belt and stuff like um i don't know i feel like you get a little bit

of judgment sometimes for that kind of stuff so um i just don't talk about it ever so i was just wondering how that would be received by everybody and um yeah, my phone blew up and my Twitter blew up that night for sure. Yeah, well, that was my question. Because, you know, I know that was the big question. And I know you talked a little bit with Caitlin about, you know, just the explanation, because we weren't really given one while watching the show. But you mentioned that you're agnostic. Is that correct? You know? Yeah. And then I've actually kind of changed it a little bit. Yeah. I would say I'm just non-religious mostly now because non-religious is like the umbrella for like agnostic atheists and unaffiliated.

I could also say agnostic as well. I'm probably leaning towards that the most if I had to choose one. And do you find that, yeah, I mean, you mentioned just a little bit of fear, you know, in terms of getting a judgment is, and you got, it sounds like a warm welcoming for just kind of putting it out there. You know, I only bring it up just obviously, cause we have a lot of people who listen to our show, a lot of people, religious, a lot of people who either grew up in a religious household and maybe aren't so much anymore and sometimes feel shame or guilt from that. Has it been kind of a rewarding, not rewarding, but reassuring experience that it's okay to feel how you feel about your beliefs, even though you had some reluctance talking about it? Yeah, no, yeah, it's definitely a very big relief. And that goes with really everything on the show so far. Honestly, I've, I've received very little like hate mail or DMS, honestly, compared to what I thought I would be receiving and what, like, the girls from Peter season went through, I was actually shocked at how little hate I've gotten. So it's been all it's all been all pretty much warm. And I've heard like great stories and people thanking me for opening up and whatnot. And, um, yeah, I've loved the reception I've had. So, um, it's been, it's been really nice.

I guess it, the anxiety came in a little bit just cause like being non-religious and like, let's just say like playing sports and stuff growing up, everybody like it's really big in sports to like, you know, bow your head and pray and that kind of stuff. And then like guys give you crap if you're not religious. And then it like just brings up some anxiety and people pick on you a little bit. So I've always been kind of an oddball when it comes to that. So I kind of just be quiet. I just don't really say much about it.

And then now it's like the whole world knows I'm not religious. And, you know, which is fine with me because I'm completely comfortable with who I am. I'm not trying to like hide that on TV. And, you know, I am who I am and I just try to be the best person I can be. And people just have to accept that basically. Totally. I mean, like you said, you are come across as a very confident, self-assured person. And interesting enough, we're talking about, you know, religion, you know, obviously, I'm sure I

don't know if you watch Matt's premiere or heard about it, but he chose to pray in his kind of first speech to the women. And a lot of people loved it. Uh, other people were just like, well, I'm, you know, if I'm not religious, that would make me uncomfortable, you know, talking about like, how have you handled in, in your dating life or your personal life, uh, going about, you know, someone in a group, you know, deciding to like, say, open a meeting in prayer or, uh, or, or whatever it is. Like, you know, if you were in the room, if you, let's say Tayshia, she's religious, let's say she opened in prayer. Like, what are your thoughts on that?

Do you like that? Do you think people should be able to do that? And if you're not religious, you can just kind of stay quiet? Or do you feel like sometimes people who, like yourself, who aren't religious or maybe practice a different religion, you know, there are a lot of people, well, what if I'm Muslim? What if I'm Jewish? What if I'm, you know, Buddhist and you just assume I'm Christian? What are your thoughts on that?

Yeah, with Matt opening things up with a prayer, I think that was a great move for him. You know, I guess he is Christian and he's that's a big part of his life. So I think that was great for him to show that to the women so that they kind of know where he stands with it a little bit. And hopefully that conversation about religion will come up a little bit sooner with with Matt and his women, you know. So I think that was great for that. Now, being on the other side and being in scenarios like like for example, my older half brother, he's, he's very Christian. He's religious. And just a bunch of situations where I've been around a lot of Christian people or for, you know, dinners or whatever and whatnot. And then people will,

you know, they decide to let's pray or whatever. A lot of times I'll just, I know most of the time I usually just go along with it. Sometimes I'll kind of just like, you know, I'll respect it basically is what I'm doing. Like I'm just respecting it. I'm, you know, I'm not, maybe won't say like amen or anything like that, but I'll just respect it and then let everybody pray. I'm not gonna, I don't have to like leave the room and make a big scene or anything like that. It's completely fine with me. Um, I respect everybody's beliefs. So, um, yeah, now if somebody said like, Hey, I haven't put your head down and say amen, or like told me to do something like then that's like, okay, like don't like force your religion on me or anything like that but yeah i respect it and i just i just let everybody do what they need to do i i may put my head down i may just you know kind of stay in there quietly but

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have been using BetterHelp that they are recruiting additional counselors in all 50 states special offer for vile file listeners get 10 off your first month at betterhelp.com vile files and yeah and like you said i mean for matt it sometimes people forget too it is a show about matt finding love right um exactly and matt set the tone early on and i assume matt probably recognized that maybe not every one of the 30 women or how many women were in that group would would love that but what was important is that that was him and and probably would attract the type of women right off the bat that he's into. Is that something you kind of mentioned earlier that it wasn't really talked about? And you actually apologized to Tayshia like when she was breaking up with you for not bringing it up. How aware were you of Tayshia's

beliefs early on that you, you know, when you apologized, did you know she was religious and chose to withhold that? Or was it just kind of like wanting to be polite and you just kind of were you didn't really realize until you guys talked about it in the fantasy suite that is one thing i like i will say i kind of regret almost because i i didn't mean to apologize i was just like i was just kind of trying to be nice and like just get off the stage quickly and just go at that point so i just wanted i just wanted to leave really and uh you know and um because at the end of day and what I realized um is like even before that I don't so I don't really know why I apologize but

um you know that's just her belief and if that's something that's important to her then really she could have brought that up a little bit sooner honestly like it's not something I ever talk about so I'm not going to bring it up but I do know that she has brought up she said maybe one time to me that like her mom instilled her faith in her. But like, like in my dating history, I've dated pretty much everybody I've dated has been Christian. And you know, it's never been a deal breaker in the past. Like we kind of, it is a little bit jarring and shocking for them maybe in the beginning, especially if they start asking like detailed questions about like things that they believe and how I view those things.

And I, and I'm simply saying like, Hey, I don't really know what's going on but I respect your belief then that kind of like shocks people I'll say so that was one thing that definitely worked against us was the whole time aspect of it all but I mean I think we can all learn from it really it's I think Tayshia being exposed to somebody like me who's non-religious is great like just a great learning opportunity for her going forward. But granted she's with Zach, so it doesn't really matter now, but it is something I'm sure she learned from. And, you know, what's interesting is like, like that night, like five of the guys texted me and they were like, what in the world, Ivan?

I'm not religious too. So I was just like, I was like, yeah, man, I mean, it's just a, it's just unfortunate situation. And that's just the guys who texted me. So, um, yeah, I guess it's something that I think everybody will just be more cognizant of, I guess, going forward. And, um, you know, Tayshia, you know, it's no fault of her own. She had the shortest bachelorette season ever, and she was kind of just thrust into that role. So maybe she didn't really get to think all this stuff out nearly as much as, you know, Claire and others have had the opportunity to, um, yeah. And then, like I said, like we had the shortest, uh, um, the shortest season ever.

So we got to the fantasy suite stage faster than anybody ever has really. Um, there really wasn't like a great time to like talk about religion, like maybe even after a cocktail party, cause like that's a longer conversation to have too. So all I had was that one-on-one early on, then hometown and then fantasy suites so it happened when it happened um there was really nothing we could do about it i think do you have an idea of how many days uh between when tatia showed up to when you found yourself in the fantasy seat with tatia and like a real time yeah it was definitely under a month though because i mean we don't have travel days or anything like that so it was just shooting back to back to back wow uh you mentioned your your

previous dating life and you know so much of this season we got to hear about a lot of the other guys dating life um and this was uh generally an older season in terms of the age of the men. And I'm assuming that a lot had to do with, you know, Claire being, you know, 39. So they're aging up. Right. And so you're like, you're 27, 28. I'm 28. Yeah. So you're 28 years old, which historically has been one of the older, you know, people on the show. And yet, because you had, you know, all these other guys who are older than you, you kind of got this, I don't want to say edit, but like people perceived you as like younger, maybe not necessarily immature because you come across as very mature, but just, just doesn't have as much experience. Like between, you know, say you and the other

guys, it was like, Ivan was the young impressionable guy who's just like in love for the first time. But yet it sounds like that might be inaccurate where you have plenty of other dating experience and we never really got to hear about, you know, maybe heartbreak or breakups that you've ever endured. Is that accurate? For sure. For sure. And yeah, we could, we could step through that a little bit as well. Cause yeah, that really wasn't told too much on TV. Um, but yeah, I appreciate you making the comment that I'm mature and I like to, I've always liked to think that I have been kind of mature for my age. And, um, I kind of think I do kind of more so compared to like a, you know, younger thirties or mid thirties year old type of guy. I have had like love experience and I have had

heartbreak and, you know, in college, you know, I never really dated too seriously, dated around or whatever. And then, you know, after college or like maybe my senior year of college and going to my early career professional days, I did date a girl for about five years on and off. So I, we were deeply in love. Like, and she was amazing and she's smart. She's a doctor now. She's great. And I really thought she could have been the one,

but then unfortunately I got a job opportunity or fortunately as well, but I got a great job opportunity in Florida. I kind of moved there and then she had to move to Houston. And, you know, things kind of just didn and then she had to move to Houston and, um, you know, things kind of just didn't work out really. And, um, and at the end of the day, we were still a little bit young and, um, and both a little bit inexperienced I'll say.

And, and, uh, when she really decided to move on, um, and I saw her like actually dating other guys is when I honestly went to like a really dark place to a certain degree, I'll say. their guys is when I honestly went to like a really dark place to a certain degree, I'll say, but, um, and I really wasn't right. I would say for at least the next like eight months, because so many times I would just think about her. I'd had to like block her from my phone just to make sure I don't think about her. And it's not like I hated her or anything at all, by any means we had a great time together, but I just like, um, almost regretted it didn't work out, work out work out

and it kind of hated this fact that we couldn't be like in the same city and all that kind of stuff and definitely missed her but yeah and then in that time especially like I'm you know 24 25 in Florida making really good money as an engineer over there near Orlando and then I'm just like traveling to Miami and going to Tampa and you know just living life honestly just trying to like do anything to like make myself feel better a little bit, you know, probably partying a little bit too much and just, you know, talking to girls just to make myself feel better. I wasn't looking for anything serious at all. And then, um, but you know, eventually you, you start to get over that. You start to realize, um, you're meeting all these people and forming all these relationships

that at the end of the day, don't really mean anything and don't add value to my life at all. Like I've been, you know, talked to or dated, went on dates with so many girls. They all mean almost, you know, the relationships don't mean much to me anymore. We didn't build anything deep at all. So now I'm like kind of in a much better place. I moved back to Dallas. I'm closer to family and I'm looking for something more serious and I don't want to return to a place where I'm just like, you know, in the streets with all,

you know, just trying to find girls to like hook up with or date around a ton. I'd rather just, you know, start to build my life going forward and with somebody who's as ambitious as me and ready to just take on the world. Sure. So a couple of follow-up questions to what you just said. I knew that was coming. One, I just want to say, A, I think it's when you mentioned you blocked your ex. I love how you pointed out that it had nothing to do with you hating her or anything wrong with her,

but it was something that you did for yourself. It sounds like, and correct me if I'm wrong wrong that you just felt like you knew yourself well enough right that you needed to stop any communication right um and just almost protect yourself and and i think that's great and i only bring that up because we mentioned that like in our ass nick episodes and when people call in that like it's okay as long as it depends on what your intentions are. Like sometimes people do it because they just want to, they want the other person to know they're, you're blocking them because they know it's going to get a reaction and they'll unblock and it's just kind of toxic. But this was all for you in self-preservation because you knew emotionally that's what you needed to

heal. And I just, I think that's, that's great. I really appreciate that. Yeah. I 100% needed to do that for myself, just to focus on stuff other than her. It just hurts you much, you know? And I, and I, I hate like the idea of like a lot of times where exes just like hate each other for no real reason. I'm like, I always appreciate the time we had and I had with my ex. I always appreciate the time I had with Taysha and I'm always going to hope and wish the best for them, honestly. Have you thought about your hair goals in 2021? Yes. Just besides keeping it? Yes. Yes, I have. Well, your hair is looking great, Chrissy. Can you explain why it's shining through the internet? This is seriously my favorite shampoo. I can't even tell you. It's not only the wonderful Montana water that also

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On the dating aspect, I am curious because, you know, I've heard it, you know, with other interviews you've done and you've said it to us in terms of like, you know, that ready to find your person, so to speak, right? And then you've done some dating. And that sounds all great, but in the meantime, right, you also sound like someone who understands his own value, has expectations of the person he wants to find. You've you've you've you've dated other people.

So you've seen the pros and cons of exes in the past. And while it's nice to be like, I'm ready to find that person. What happens in the next two or three years if you don't? I'm assuming you're still going to date. So I just want to be clear. You're not necessarily against dating or meeting, but like it's just more or less of a mindset in terms of where was there a period of time where you're just kind of like, I don't want to date and I just was more dating casually with without any idea of pursuing the next steps with someone? Yeah, so so yeah, my mindset, for example, like my mid 20s, 24 to 26, I'd say I,

I had no intentions of having like a, a girlfriend or serious relationship or potentially getting married. Like I wanted to date around. I wanted to have experience dating all different types of women of different types of cultures and backgrounds and whatnot. That's what I wanted to do. Cause I thought that would give me great experience going forward. Um, and I really wasn't looking to do anything serious. Yeah. And then now like going forward and, um, through my experiences, I experiences, I'm going to say like, I'm in a place where I definitely want to settle down now, but I don't want to force it at all. And I definitely do have very high requirements, I'd say for like a potential partner for myself. So

I, yeah, I don't want to force it. And you know, there's a balancing act, but I definitely do want to be like earnest in my like intent for looking for like a life partner, I guess I could say. Yeah, for sure. What are the things that you've learned about yourself and through your previous dating experiences that you have found that you thought you wanted in a partner and now realize it's not the best fit for yourself? I guess the question is more around like we have a tendency of like list building when we're younger, you know, like I want X, Y, and Z. And then we, as we get older, realize, well, that's not really important, but this is important type of thing. I think I kind of always knew this, but like the thing that, you know, definitely makes itself apparent with me for me at least is like, I could be with the

most beautiful looking woman in the world. But if, um, if somebody isn't like challenging me at all, I get bored very quickly. And, um, I also realized like, I generally do need a, a girl who's like pretty intelligent or smart or who can teach me things because otherwise I just get bored or we need to be able to like talk about like cool topics and her be like able to ask like good questions and whatnot. So that is one thing I learned as far as like actual long term relationships lasting because the surface level stuff only lasts so long, I'd say for sure. because the surface level stuff only lasts so long, I'd say for sure. And it, yeah, it's not like, I'm definitely can never be like one of those guys who just has like a trophy wife that could never work out for me at all, I would say. Yeah, I can relate to that. What are things that, what do you like talking most about?

I mean, like if we were on a date, Ivan, like what would be a question I could ask you that would pique your interest? Or, you know, more accurately of say a young lady's listening to this podcast and she's just like, I just, I just want to, I want to stimulate Ivan's brain. What can she ask you? about a topic or whatever it is, their careers maybe. And if they could just go into details about the things they're doing and they're, they're really ambitious in their field or being a entrepreneur or being a lawyer or doctor. And then, you know,

and then they're kind of just nerding out and just telling me all these different things. Like I'm going to ask a ton of questions just to, just to understand for myself. So like that's the kind of stuff I really want to see more than anything. I think it's somebody who's like passionate about you know a variety of different topics and just has a big heart really um but yeah it could be it could be really anything i don't like have a specific topic i like always like to dig into um but yeah i think that's great i i definitely relate to um hearing someone's passion about what they're like, just whatever they're passionate about. Exactly.

Especially if it's a topic that for me, at least, you know, I know very little about. Right. And so they speak passionately about it. And I'm just like, oh, that's interesting. I am attracted and I wonder if you agree. I'm attracted to people who are good at things that I don't know, that I'm not good at, or like you point, that you can learn from them. And it's just like, you know, almost, it's a way of almost putting me in my place, I suppose. Are you the same way? I think I am, yeah.

I'm definitely that way a little bit too, I would say, for sure. I do like that. Is it safe to say that you're a rocket scientist? No. No, it's not safe to say that you're a rocket scientist no no it's not safe what is the difference what is the difference between being aeronomical and i can't even pronounce an engineer and i have a friend i who i don't know if he works for lockheed martin but he does what you do and i jokingly call him a rocket scientist what is the difference between your title and a rocket scientist yeah to to be clear i've actually have never had that title you know shot this is a newsbreaker here nobody i haven't told anybody that yet but i um i told the show that my like

i just said just put down engineer like that's that sounds good to me but because of the fact that i work for a company that builds jets for the military you know they they embellished and added aeronautical engineer on there so that that's fine because that's mostly what like a lot of the people that work at my company are aeronautical engineers but yeah I've mostly been my degree was industrial engineering um I've mostly been a systems engineer and um in my in my career I'm a I'm a I'm kind of in software quality now and project management and process improvement I would say now but yeah I'm technically not an aeronautical engineer I actually don't know too much about how to actually design jets or anything I'm I do know a lot about data and and metrics and process improvement more so but I just happen to be

working at a company that's all centered around aerospace and what's very honest with you to say ivan um you know i don't know i hope no one's disappointed that and uh the fact that you technically i'm sorry i'm sorry yeah i will say i will say rocket scientist rocket scientist sounds much better i will you can just take that now why just not take it i mean it's already associated with me now i think yeah most people most people are running with it so i don't care really what they call me it's fine it's all engineering my buddy he actually does work on the rocket so he would jokingly when in his younger days would you know like at bars and what do you do and she's like well i'm a rocket scientist and obviously they think you're joking and technically technically he was um so i just i just wanted to ask but um

for sure we got to know uh obviously uh your family a little bit on the hometown episode and specifically your brother who was as well received as you were. I think he really made a great impression. You know, his story a little bit was he was in prison, right? Yes. And I think it sounds like you have become more passionate about prison reform. Yeah, it's something like prison and prison reform. It something that like i was aware of growing up but you know if it doesn't really touch you um you don't really think too hard about it and especially the way um the prison system is they like hide prisons in like the middle of nowhere and stuff

so people don't see it too much and you know the u.s has the highest like imprisonment rate and most prisoners in the entire world and we're not nearly the biggest country um but we're supposed to be the greatest and um and yeah and then like growing up my brother and i we were very close he's only a year and a half younger than me so like we grew up like this like we did everything together and he's also like very athletic so we used to just like play sports together fight all the time um grew up like in the same room till we were entirely too old. And so we were very similar in a lot of ways. And, and, you know, I was a good student, he was a really good student, an athlete as well. But yeah, really, when I went to college, you know, I went off to, you know, go down my path and become engineer. And then he kind of, kind of just, you know, lost control a

little bit started getting into things he really didn't he had no business getting into with like drugs and alcohol and stuff like that and um getting into fights with people and now just like this really dangerous path especially when it comes to addiction and then um that continued on you know he he would be arrested here and there just maybe spend a day in jail or whatever and that continued on for quite a while I'll say maybe like um a few years until like when he was 20 or 21 is when like you know something really bad happened and unfortunately he did have to spend you know four plus years in prison and um that was just really hard on myself and my family and um but it also like opened all of our eyes up um way more than they already were as to what's going on with these with the prison conditions and whatnot. And it's just very sad because like people do know like my brother did have a girlfriend and she was pregnant at the time he did go into prison.

when she was born he was behind the glass we never he never got to touch my niece for the first two years of her life ever hug her or anything was always through a glass and it would be like the saddest thing to say to see ever and we had a couple pictures too and and then it was just hard for him it was just hard for me you know once you spend a certain amount of time in prison you kind of start to become a hardened hardened prisoner and I was definitely kind of starting to see that a little bit. And, you know, navigating the things that are going on in prison is crazy. It's absolutely mind-boggling and crazy. And then my brother would have to like, tell me about these stories. And, you know, we would have just these one-on-one talks and I'm trying to coach him through as best as I possibly can without ever being able to help him. My brother didn't do the easiest of time. I'll be

honest. He does like to fight and stuff like that and doesn't back down from anybody, no matter how big you are. So, you know, he got into it with a lot of different people and stuff. So there's just a lot of stuff he was trying to navigate. He had to navigate and, you know, changed him in a lot of ways. He also got to do a lot of reading and became educated in there as well. But yeah, the conditions sucked. One time, this was the thing that really sticks with me. And then I kind of told on the show where, I don't even remember what exactly,

or if he even did anything or what exactly he did. But I know the correctional officers beat him up really badly. And they ended up sending him to the high security unit for like an entire 10 months, I want to say. And in the high security unit, this is where he's not a good place at all. Cause these guys are locked up 23 hours a day. Most, most of the time it's actually 24 hours a day just because they don't even get to get that one hour of rec time in the size of like a closet two guys for an entire 10 months, which is just like, that's just pure torture in my mind, honestly. I don't, yeah, I don't see that's not rehabilitative at all for anybody. And he just

went to a really dark place. So, you know, all we could do was write to him. We couldn't talk to him anymore. And it was just a tough time. So yeah, all that being said, it's just opened my eyes. And one of the biggest things, I guess this really comes from my job a little bit too, and when I researched prison reform and statistics and data on what's going on in prison or correctional officer brutality and that kind of stuff, there's nothing out there. There's no visibility into what's going on back there at all. And all the prisoners complain about how correctional officers could do what they want and they're they're they're the judge jury executioner they make all the decisions there's no third party to monitor what's going on you can get away with

whatever you want you know um of course there's good ones but there's definitely a lot of bad ones too you know so it's just uh opened my eyes and i think that's the biggest problem is just there's just a total lack of visibility and the prisoners. Almost like accountability. So like, kind of to your point, it almost sounds like, yeah, there might be great prison guards, but if there's bad ones, no one's doing anything about it. Exactly.

And you get, and that's almost human nature. Like if you think you could get away with some stuff, like you're a lot of times people, you know, we'll do that, you know, it's, um, it's a bad, it's kind of like a God complex kind of almost. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Like when, when you get in position to power, sometimes you abuse that power and that's just kind of what happens because you know, these guys, and also the other thing is nobody's

advocating for prisoners. Like they're just forgotten, you know? Um, I fully, totally understand that they're in there for a reason. Um, and they're, you know, paying for what they what they've done in the real world. But, you know, they still need we still need to think about the fact that pretty much the vast majority of these people are coming back into the real world. And rehabilitation is more so the key than just torture, you know, more, more mental and physical abuse, like that just makes a worse situation. We're not helping them, we're hurting them more. Like it's, it's not a good situation at all. And yeah. So that's something I definitely want to bring light to and hopefully work with some, you know, groups on just bringing more visibility to

that topic. And, you know, so that'll, that's going to be a lifelong project of mine for sure. Well, that's great to hear. Is there anything, I mean, I know you just mentioned that there is, it's, it's kind of hard to find or how to get involved, but if there are people listening who want to learn more and become more involved in something like prison reform stuff, where are some places that people can go or how could they become more involved or just educate themselves? Yeah. So, yeah, I've looked at a lot of places, but I will say I'll, I'll definitely roll something out here soon on my Instagram. At some point, I want to do a little bit more research first before I really give like any specific places and just make sure they're like completely credible and good sources. So that is something I definitely want to tie into my

social media for sure is like just bringing light to prison conditions and prison reform and really addressing the root causes as to why are these people even in prison in the first place? That's like the actual main thing that you need to fix is are the root causes. I'm curious. I'm just at this thought about this, but like, obviously, Tasha and Claire season was a season that a lot of things that we haven't previously seen before, you know, Ben talking about his eating disorder, obviously talking about his mental health struggles with suicide, Zach with addiction, and then you obviously with your brother

talking about being incarcerated and your bond. Is that a conversation you had with producers about the possibility of them coming on? I know he surprised you, but what was that? Oh, that whole dynamic? Just that uh oh that hold on just that hella dynamic and the fact that they that that conversation was even aired right the fact that you had a brother and then you know we didn't really get a lot in a police reform on the show but it seemed to be touched on a little bit or just the bond that you had and you know what was

that conversation or leading up to it or how much conversations did you have with producers about your brother and and was there a hope of having him come on to talk about that stuff with the one-on-one there wasn't really um there wasn't like in in interviews like the producers may have asked me like how have i thought about the world events in 2020 and that kind of stuff so like it was just some regular conversations and whatnot that all just came out really just organically to be honest it's not like i plan to like bring that stuff up but the uh the conversation about my brother specifically with Taysha I guess is I did well I did plan to bring that up because like I I did know that like the story of my brother is like definitely impacted me in my life more than probably anything else ever has and shaped the way like I think and view people and try to be empathetic um so that's why I wanted

to share that with her and um now and my brother definitely knew that going into all of this as well, like before I left, because like, he knows, if I'm going to build any sort of real connection, like I have to talk about him and how that affected me and all that kind of stuff. And, and then going into the family hometown weekend. I remember early on, they asked me like, who all would I want to come from my hometown and I was like my mom my dad my brother and my niece those four I need those four and my brother are still very close so when they when Chris Harrison said it was just my mom and my dad um it actually freaked me out more than anything because I was like why is my brother not here that's what I was

that's what was going on in my head I was trying to be like like happy that my mom and dad were there but it freaked me out in my head because um like why wouldn't he be there why wouldn't he be there yeah he did something happen yeah it's like um and that's the thing that people don't really know about much is like um we're still in like even though he's been out of jail prison for a year and a half now we're still dealing with things and situations occur and And then even before that we used to, I used to always get late night calls. This happened, he crashed the car, whatever it is. And I would have to go kind of save the day. And, and that kind of still happens today, honestly. And it's a, it's still a work in progress. And right before I left, actually sent me like this

really ominous text that just freaked me out. He was like, Hey, Ivan, no matter what happens out here, just like finish the show, no matter what, just like do what you need to do. text that just freaked me out he was like hey Ivan no matter what happens out here just like finish the show no matter what just like do what you need to do and that just like freaked me out I remember and yeah I know we were getting emotional thinking about it but the but it really it truly no it truly did freak me out because I was like dang I'm gonna be gone and there's like nothing I'll be able to do but but yeah so that's that's what was messing with me the whole time and then and then to see my, I was great, but I honestly thought they were going to tell me something terrible had happened. And then, um, so I was just trying to prepare myself mentally to like, not cry or anything like that. And I just wanted to be strong, especially for

my mom, cause she's a sweetheart and I didn't want to make her sad or anything. Um, so that's where my mind was mentally. I was like, I'm cry i'm gonna just like comfort my mom after this and then um and then he walked out and that's why it was just like such a big relief and way off my shoulders because i was like ah they got me they got me here and then they got me again doing talking about it well i i appreciate you ivan going to that place and sharing it just because I think it's obviously a very inspirational story. If nothing else, it's always great to see a connection with someone's sibling and how close and protective you are of your family. And, you know, whether it's someone who if we you know, one of my best friend, he's got a brother who's been in and out of prison his whole life. you know, one of my best friend, he, he's got a brother who's been in and out of prison his whole life. And, you know, we, whether we have siblings who have, who've gone down that path, but we all

have people in our lives who don't make always the best decisions and get themselves in trouble. And we get afraid for them. And, um, and so, uh, I appreciate you sharing that. And it's, uh, it's nice to hear that. It sounds like things are going well right now for your brother, but like you said, you don't take anything for granted and you know, it's nice to see you have that bond. No, I appreciate that. Yeah. It was just like, it was just yeah. Growing up a little bit, just to give a little bit more, it's like, I kind of always put a real pressure on myself and my parents did a little bit

too, just to be like a good role model for him just because I was just two years older than him. And so that's what I like pride myself on being like, that's the main reason why I didn't drink growing up or cuss or do like anything bad was just like set a good role model for him. So yeah, so it's so like just him going down the wrong path. For a little bit, I felt like a failure almost as an older brother. I definitely don't feel like that now. I just realized, you know, that's the way he's making his own decisions and it's just his own path. But, um, I'm still always going to look after him no matter what. That's, that's awesome. You guys have such a close bond. So, and, um, yeah, I mean, that's it. That's, that's great. Um, what, what else, what else does, what else do we not know about Ivan that, uh, I feel, I feel like there's so much about you that people didn't get to learn because you know the show as we talked about there's only so much time they can only so show much of your personality and story you know that's part of it as just a limitation of time but my guess is is if your friends or the people who've gotten to spend a lot of time with you

over the years they would say there's so many things about you that people would be surprised. And I'm curious what those are. Yeah, I do have some just some random, quite a few random things about me, I would say for sure. And I always kind of shock people. But well, okay. So yeah, one thing I did talk about on the show a little bit and that I am really passionate about is money and investing, to be honest. You know, something again, I realized is like another issue with like, especially young, well, not just young Americans, really all Americans where people don't ever talk about finances too much or try to figure out or plan for like retirement or anything like that, or plan for the future. And, you know, being like an early career professional,

like, well, I've been working like five, six years now and made a decent, you know, decent living for myself. I needed to figure out like what I needed to do with all my money. And I wanted to make sure I was doing things right. Like everybody else around me, I see is just like, they have no clue what's going on in their 401k. They have no clue what like what a Roth is.

They have no clue about like higher interest savings accounts or REITs or stocks or anything. So that's something I focused a lot on early on. And I think I'm in a really good spot for it now. And I've actually taught some classes and mentored people on taking care of their finances and investing. Because it's almost by design, I feel like, in this country where I've never been taught almost anything about finances in school ever that I could remember. Nobody knows how to buy, teaches you how to buy a house almost and how that all works or how interest rates work. So yeah, it's a goal of mine for sure to be able to make finances and investing very fun and simple for people to understand because Um, cause I,

I get, it's honestly not the most like riveting topic to most people. I find it fascinating, but it's not fun for most people. So I want to like be able to eventually on my social media, like, um, share things and show people things without it being boring and just like maybe small clips and then maybe have a followup blog post in more detail about it. But like, just the, just like 30 minutes of your time could set you up so much better later on and, um, later on down the road for retirement. And we wouldn't have so many, as many issues, um, as we do now with people running out of money when they're older. Yeah. Well, that's, that is true. Um, let me know.

That is so true though. Nobody ever teaches you that stuff in school, even in economics class. How did you, how did you get into that? Is that something you've always been passionate about? I've been fortunate where my dad was good with that. It was tight with money because we had a lot of siblings and then all my uncles were in finance and my grandfather was in finance and they were all just really cheap. But they taught me all that stuff. Did you learn that from your dad or where did you get that kind of knowledge and interest in the topic? Yeah. Growing up, I grew up, I'll say, in an upper middle class family. So my dad did have a pretty good job. But unfortunately, he honestly came from nothing, grew up in Southside, Chicago. He didn't, he didn't honestly know too much about money at all. Like I, it's kind

of funny, like a year ago, I want to say maybe or less than that. I asked my parents what their net worth was. They had no clue at all. Like they both said a number. I was like, you're completely wrong. And I was just me like taking one minute to think about it. So it's just so, and it's just shocking to me how much people don't know about their own finances. But one thing that my parents did to me, or I don't know if they even really forced me to do this, but they gave me a safe when I was pretty young. And I remember I loved that safe and saved all the money that I ever got in that safe. And they were shocked at how much money I was accumulating. So I don't know if that was kind of the thing that made me start to get more into it. that was like kind of the thing that made me start to get more into it.

And then, yeah. And then, and then as I, you know, actually started working and making a good decent living as an engineer and had all this like excess money, I knew I didn't just want to leave it in a savings account and getting like next to no interest at all. I wanted to see what my options were. I wanted to diversify and invest that money because compounding interest effect is amazing and can lead to hundreds of thousands of dollars more, millions of dollars more later on in my life, especially by the time I'm 60 or whatever. So yeah, it's just something that I recognized, I guess, as a need.

Yeah. And I definitely was aware of the fact we never had like any finance classes. And my dad, my dad is pretty knowledgeable and like recognizing issues with america so i'll say he kind of got some of that in me a little bit but um even he himself isn't really with the times i would say as far as finances go what give our audience one simple finance tip in terms of not so much finance but but like the key to saving, like what's a common mistake we make other than like we buy the things we want more than we buy the things we really need. The key to saving really is just discipline. It's honestly, for me, it's mostly comes down to that for most people. It's just discipline. I could tell you to do a budget, but it comes down to

your own self-discipline. Like if you don't have it, then there's not much we can do, to be honest. Like it is just is what it is. I don't have too many special trips. I will say budgeting does help some people being able to see, have that visibility into what they're spending per month versus what they're saving per month does help them. But from what I've seen, it just comes down to self-discipline. And I think being able to educate yourself on, you know, what you want to, what you want your life to look like in the future might get more people to like, look into saving more. I'll say that too, though. So it's, um, but yeah, as young people, you don't, you just don't care really is the, is the key. Like you just don't think that far down the road. And I've, I always tend to think down the road though. So

we, we didn't talk about, talk about obviously your conversation with Taylor when we didn't talk about your conversation with Tasha, where you guys talked about Black Lives Matter. Right. You brought it up. It was obviously a powerful conversation that you had with with Tasha and one that got a lot of recognition for being unique on a show that hasn't talked about it a lot. Obviously, Black Lives Matter has been a more prominent movement, obviously, in 2020, but race, dating, representation obviously hasn't been that strong on the show. Is that something that you felt when you brought it up to Tayshia? Because it seemed like you were the one who initiated that conversation. Did you notice that coming on the show as a person of color? I don't know how familiar you were

with the show in the past, but did you see that as an opportunity to bring that up? And what was the reason? Because we've had other people of color, but you seem to be the one who really decided to have that conversation with Tayshia. Yeah, so I'll talk about the conversation first then a little bit, then I'll back it up a little bit, but yeah, with that conversation in particular, I guess that it was

that whole night and date, I think was the perfect setup for me. Cause I love game nights and it was just a very comfortable situation for Tayshia and myself. I didn't feel like there were cameras there as much as like how I felt on other group dates or other things. So it really just felt like it was herself and me there. And on top of that, that was in the summer. So that was just after all this crazy stuff happened in May and June. So that was like just something that recently kind of affected us. And, you know, and it caused me to think a lot.

You know, and it caused me to think a lot. It caused me to, you know, come up with all these ideas and idea banks and projects and whatnot that I want to do going forward. And, you know, that had that happened like up until the time I was on the show. So I knew it affected her as well because she's a you know, she's biracial, but we're both viewed as black at the end of the day here in America. So I just wanted to see kind of what her thoughts were on how things went and what her viewpoints were really, and just get an understanding of where she was at with it. And then, oh yeah, and then to follow up with that, going into the show, I did become aware of the like lack of diversity for sure, especially with that Batch Diversity campaign and the stuff they were saying and, and then others like yourself and Rachel and whatnot. And yeah, I never really watched the show.

I started watching the show when I maybe watched a couple episodes of Rachel Lindsay way back in the day. And then I saw Peter season cause that was around the time I was going through casting. So I wanted to get an idea for what was going on. And then I went back and bought Hannah Brown season and just wanted to see the limo entrances for that just to figure that whole situation out i've had you we i respect that because you did exactly what i did when i was going through the casting process i watched the most current season and i went back and bought the most previous bat surratt um so hey i like the way your brain works so it's just like well maybe

i'm missing something uh the bachelor or bat right i don't. So it's just like, well, maybe I'm missing something. The bachelor, bachelor. I don't know if it's different. So I, exactly. Did you get as much anxiety when you were first watching the limo exits with the guys? Cause I remember watching it going through the casting process and it was Desiree season. And I was just like, I don't think I can do this. I don't, I was watching with my family.

I was like, I really don't think I can do this. Oh man. No, I'll say this. I don't, I was watching with my family. I was like, I really don't think I can do this. Oh man. No, I'll say this. Uh, I knew that was going to be like a high pressure moment, but also I knew that I didn't want to do anything crazy for sure. So I was like, I'm not going to be one of the guys with all the craziness going on. I'm going to keep it nice and simple or maybe add a little bit of flair, but nothing too crazy. So I wasn't too worried about that one going into it. Like if I had a proper or something crazy to go on to be judged by, then yeah, I would definitely would have had a little anxiety, I think.

But I know I was going to just be myself and keep it me. So I wasn't too worried about the limo entrances. One more question before we play our game. Do you know me? Obviously I'm sure you, I don't know if you've been asked this already, but as a fan favorite we all we'll all love you obviously there's opportunities to maybe come back and be seen in the bachelor franchise specifically paradise and who knows in the future uh you know bachelor or and um would you want to come back I know you're looking for love you are open to meeting someone like

obviously I'm assuming outside of that world but is that something you're open to if you are open to meeting someone like obviously i'm assuming outside of that world but is that something you're open to if you are you find yourself single when they're when they're casting for the next season of paradise yeah 100 i'm that's exactly it like i'm definitely open to it i think going around going the second time around i'll be extremely well much more comfortable than i was the first time for sure but that being said it is like a really far time off and I'll be honest I'm not one of those guys who's like dying to be on TV again I'd love to do it I think it'd be fun for sure but like I'm not like planning my life for it at by any means necessary I totally plan a date in real life first and see

how this goes and if I have but if I happen to be single, I'll yeah, I'll for sure. I'd love to go. I was, it was all around a great experience for me. Everybody from ABC, the production, everybody was great to me and they, you know, my, everything about it was great top to bottom. I have zero complaints, so it's, I'd love to do it again and hopefully find love again, especially when there's, you know, a little bit more to choose from, I'll say. hopefully find love again, especially when there's, you know, a little bit more to choose from, I'll say. Indulge me with this question. Who from, say, Peter's season or this current season do you find might be, without knowing that much, could be both somebody that you would be interested in getting to know from a cerebral level. Who do you find attractive? Who might you be interested in talking to and getting to know more from, say, the past two seasons?

Does anyone stand out? Okay, so of course I had like a physical attraction to a lot of the women on Peter's season. But to be honest, as far as like long-term dating, I don't know if I really see it there. I did find like Victoria Fuller and Sydney to be very attractive physically. But granted, again, I don't know anybody from that season at all. But just from the little bit I do know, I don't think long term it would work out really with too many of them. But you never know. Maybe somebody who went home early. And then from that season, yeah, there's a ton of gorgeous women, a lot of diversity, which looks like my dating history honestly so that's that's really nice to see um yeah and then there's definitely

some cute girls on there too um what about yeah i don't really want to you don't want to say a name what about brie i'm a huge fan of brie i'll let you i'll let you make the pick i feel like i feel like she's uh and i'm not saying i'm not going on paradise i'm not in a situation but i i do i think she's beautiful she's she seems really intelligent if she doesn't end up with matt i think she could end up with matt though so i don't want to step on any toes but maybe you and brie abigail all seems like a wonderful lady yeah yeah well i mean we'll see how things play out i uh seems like a wonderful lady yeah yeah well i mean we'll see how things play out i uh all right keep it tight to the vet yeah yeah okay out of respect for matt yeah we'll just let that play out uh and i'll just you know date in my regular life for now but you never know if i'll

be out there so we'll see all right buddy um are you up for playing a quick game with us uh before we let you go let's do it sounds good let's do it he just said he loves games great we're good just want to double check you know games are the best yeah i just want to be respectful uh it's called do you know me ivan it's real simple um i'm gonna ask a question can ivan this has i even ever done this blah blah blah blah don't answer right away chrissy and i are going to guess and see uh who knows ivan better uh if there's an anecdotal story you care to share about your answer we'd love to hear it uh also a simple yes or no will suffice got it uh question number one can ivan name five beat songs? Can Ivan name five Beatles songs? This is a great first question.

This was questions that were selected by Amanda, who's part of our social media team. What do we call you? The social media syndicate? Great. All right. Excellent. Syndicate.

Well thought out question because you know uh legendary band five songs is a lot i don't know if i can name five songs yeah i would say you could probably name three but i don't think you can name five i want ivan i want to i'm i'm gonna i'm gonna believe in ivan here i think you can do it all right go ahead ivan it's a resounding no for me resounding can you name one beatle song i gotta be honest i can't listen i can't name one honestly i'm let it be everybody knows let it be okay i'll if you play it i'll know it of course like i've heard you don't you might not know that's a beatle song yeah i might not even know it's a beatle song honestly That's the thing.

With music growing up, I honestly didn't really get too much into music until later on, and I don't ever remember the people's names. I kind of just run through the top 100 playlist type stuff. So I'm not the biggest into music at all. Question number two. So I won that one, just making sure. Noted. Is Ivan smiling in their driver's license photo? I'm going to say no.

I'm going to say yes. Yes, I am. God damn it. Yes, I am. Can we confirm that? No, never mind. It's pretty funny because I don't want to share it because i think it's a picture of when i was 17 so i have no facial hair it's crazy so just renewed it every year i need to take a new picture really i'm down

oh two has ivan given someone the middle finger in the past year has ivan given someone the middle finger in the past year i'm gonna say no i'm gonna say yes it's like who doesn't flip people off at least in a once a year in the car i'll tell you who doesn't well poised thought out people who understand that a thumbs up and the right situation is far more satisfying than letting someone know that they got to him. And I feel like Ivan recognizes that. Am I right? Yeah. Yeah. I have not flicked anybody off in a car. Yeah. Road rage is a real thing, especially in Texas where everybody's got guns and stuff. I don't really want to get to have any problems. So you haven't flicked anybody off in a whole year. No, I honestly didn't know i don't i truly

i don't know i don't remember the last time i've flipped someone off maybe since i was a kid i rarely ever even get mad to be honest like i always think i like go through that process that emotion so quickly that i'm like oh let me not waste my time with it so it's such a weird thing about me yeah does Ivan have a journal yes yes no I don't oh you know what I don't know why I said yes I mean I'm sure there's there's plenty of difference between you and I Ivan but there are definitely some similarities and I don't have a journal I don't know why I immediately assumed yes yeah I think that I think we do have quite a few similarities with the way we think so stick stick to that it's like you're so smart you can keep all the stuff in your brain the two of you don't have like i try i've been way i try why even way smarter than me i tried to get myself to

journal when i was on the show i just couldn't like i i couldn't i was like oh what a perfect time to journal for the first time ever in my life and like two days later i was like nah exactly i'll just remember it for sure i i i had plans to do so much and do a lot in my journal nothing happened but that's the thing i yeah i journal in my brain i take a mental note i i can yeah i'm a bennett journal he looks like a guy who would just sit and journal. Does Ivan like to talk to their Uber driver? I'm going to go with my gut and my, I'm going to, I'm going to take my,

I'm going to say no, because I don't, I'm going to say yes, because I can see it. The conversation starting. I'll say no. Like granny, if they talk to me, you will, you will, but you prefer not to, if they talk to me.

You will, you will, but you prefer not to if you had the choice. Yeah. And I, and then like, whenever you're with a group of friends who just like all of a sudden, one of them just wants to have this full conversation with them and ask them a ton of questions. I feel like they feel uncomfortable sometimes. And they probably do it all the time. I don't, it just depends. I can go with it, but yeah, I don't, I'd rather just sit there and be on my phone probably.

Has Ivan had sex on the first date? Ever. Has Ivan ever had sex on a first date? Does it have to be a full-on date, or can it be like out at the bar? Yeah, we don't necessarily need details from Ivan if he doesn't want to share, but yeah, all of that would include.

I'm going to say yes. I'm going gonna say yes as well it's a yes yeah great we're sex positive here Ivan yeah different mindset back in the day for sure and also with your current mindset it's allowed would you oh that's a good question it I'm curious. I'm curious. I'm just like a personal, you know, you, you want to find love. Um, but does that mean for you, have you changed your mindset on, um, how much you want to pursue a physical relationship or not necessarily? Uh, it's changed a little bit for sure. Um, I don't really, I don't like the idea for myself, at least sure. Back in the day, I love the idea of, you know, I don't know when I'd stands or, or took an up after first date or whatever, but, um, now, yeah, not, not as much. I I'd rather, um, that'd be something maybe a little bit later on for both our sakes really. Um, actually,

well, if, if it happened, it happened really. I mean, let me take that back. I, if it happens, it happens. Cause like, if there's enough Because if there's a strong enough attraction there, I'm not going to lie here and say it won't happen. So, yeah, I guess I'm open to it. Which is fine. But so it sounds like the nuance is that you recognize that if it happens, it feels right. But that's not, it's certainly on the bottom of your priority list in terms of getting to know someone. Yeah. Yeah, like maybe in the past,

I made exceptions knowing this relationship wasn't going to mean anything. Going forward, it would have to be a relationship or somebody who I really have actual interest in. Last question. We'll go PG. Can Ivan name all four houses in the Hogwarts School of witchcraft and

wizardry? I'm going to say no. I'm going to say no. It's probably a no. Cause I think I could go. I think I only have three Gryffindor. I decided to go answer all my questions. What do I know?

And I, I don't, I think I can name three. I think that's the, yeah. The Gryffindor Slytherin. And what is it? Hufflepuff or something or. And I don't, I think I can name three. I think that's the, yeah, the Gryffindor, Slytherin, and what is it, Hufflepuff or something? And then, I can't, there's Amanda.

Ravenclaw. Ravenclaw. Ravenclaw, there it is. Ravenclaw I think is often forgotten, right? By the non-diehards. Those all sound like cereals. Like a Huff and Puff. Yeah, the Huff and Puff.

They all sound like cereal names. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, the Huff and Puff. They all sound like cereal names. Yeah. Yeah. Close though. She was probably eating cereal and she was writing the book. Ivan, thanks so much for joining us and being so candid and sharing your stories, answering the questions. Where can people find you on social if they want to learn more about you and follow your journey post Taysha and Claire? Yeah. So again, appreciate you guys having me. I

have listened to you guys a couple of times and love your podcast for sure. And so it's an honor to be here. But yeah, to follow me on Instagram or Twitter, TikTok, It's Ivan B. Hall on all of those. Or Twitter is IvanBHall8. I'll say that. But yeah, couldn't get the Ivan B. Hall. But yeah, just follow me on there and follow the journey, I guess. Awesome, buddy. I appreciate it.

I hope to meet you in person at some point. And if nothing else, I hope to see you on the big screen or little screen. I don't know. Whatever. I hope to see you on the beach if it's right for you. Got it. Yeah, we'll see. I appreciate that.

All right, buddy. Thank you, guys. Take care. And as always, thanks for listening, guys. We appreciate you tuning in. Don't forget to send your questions at asknick at castme.com. Cast with a K. We'll see you on Monday for our Ask Nick episode.

Next week, I don't know. Whatever. We've got a lot of good stuff coming up. Fuck it. Have a good day.