The Viall Files - E322 Amelie Zilber - Substance Comes From Within

Episode Date: September 22, 2021

Today we are joined by influencer, activist, and model, Amelie Zilber. Amelie uses her platform to educate fans about political issues she cares about, with a focus on the Middle East. We also spoke about being conscious of your community and recognizing that much of the time we view things from a surface level. We also talked about maintaining a healthy work-life with your partner, and how public to make your public relationship.  “Don’t take things at surface level.” Please make sure to subscribe so you don’t miss an episode and as always send in your relationship questions to [e-mail] to be a part of our Monday episodes.  For merch please visit www.viallfiles.com today! THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSORS: MasterClass: Go to http://www.masterclass.com/VIALL Viall Files listeners get 15% off an annual membership.  Public Rec: Go to http://www.publicrec.com and use promo code VIALL to receive 10% off. Laithwaites: Text VIALL to 64-000 to get six amazing bottles of wine, plus two bonus bottles and two stemless wine glasses for $49.99 (plus tax) with free delivery.  Episode Socials:  @viallfiles @nickviall @ameliezilber See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

what's going on everybody welcome back to last episode on the Vile Files. She's literally, after we get done, going deep into the woods to find. Not before I press my uniform. You're like on the hunt for undiscovered trees. Is that? M mating rituals of elk that's gonna be my feature you will be missed chrissy with all this dating advice how can i not do something else that has to do with relationships and sex uh well chrissy we love you it's been a pleasure having how many episodes did you do with us?

Do you know? Like 180. 180. It's crazy. Is it because as my producer, you have to re-listen to all the episodes? Do you hate my voice now? I guess I could say the same thing to my audience

or ask the same question. No, I don't hate your voice. I'm just used to it. It's a good voice. But yes, I listened to them multiple times each episode. You have a good voice. I told you, I sent you a message earlier. I love you, Nick. I love you so much. And I like to watch you grow and to watch this show grow and to have the addition of Amanda and Allie, and then all the people that work behind the scenes on this show that would never get the recognition. It's,

it's, it's sad, but it's, I'm excited for what's in front of me, but it's sad because I love all the people. Well, you never get the recognition you deserve as the producer. So much of your,

that you brought to the show is behind the scenes also your laugh the people are gonna miss your laugh everything that ever happened to me was for howie mandel to say my my laugh was great and annoying all at the same time um my favorite moment well we have a great great episode for you uh amelie zilber is with us a young up and come well not even up and coming she has arrived a tiktok star but not the type of tiktok star you might think of she doesn't dance she doesn't sing or lip sync. She informs and really enjoyed this conversation. I don't think I've ever met someone, especially her age or even regardless of age,

incredible perspective of views on life. And I think we can take a lot of wisdom from her and just a really fun conversation. So if you are a fan of Amelie and you are tuning in for the first time to this podcast to listen to her, welcome. We appreciate you listening to our show. We have three shows a week. We have these types of interviews where we talk to public figures like Amelie. We have a relationship and dating show on Mondays called Ask Nick. People email their stories in, they call in, they share their stories, very relatable stories about all sorts of different

relationship topics. And we share some perspective and give an honest interpretation of what their situation might be so they can empower them to make better choices about their decision. So if you are in any type of relationship situation that you sometimes struggle with finding the answers or you're tired of leaning on your friends that just tell you what you want to hear give us a listen i think you might enjoy it and then also we cover the bachelor when it's on if you're into that sort of thing um that one sells itself either like it or you don't you just always leave it for the end you're into that sort of thing, that one sells itself either like it or you don't leave it for the end. You're like,

and finally the bachelor, you know, but yeah, that's a, that's our episode that we're going to bring you today. Allie, Amanda, what,

anything new with you ladies before we get into it? Yeah. I need your perspective on something because I wasn't here yesterday, so I couldn't ask you. Okay. So met this guy on a dating app, before we get into it yeah i need your perspective on something because i wasn't here yesterday so i couldn't ask you uh-huh um okay so met this guy on a dating app right we made plans to go out on saturday night we were like gonna grab burgers or drinks or something when he was done at the hospital because he's in his final year of med school whatever we like chat back and forth like we're texting for a few days beforehand he's like i'll let you know when i'm off i get fully ready for this date he has text like i was like how's work going and

he was like oh i'm home and i was like okay cool just like let me know what the timing is because it's cheaper for me to like schedule a lift than do an asap because he's in freaking highland park and i'm in hollywood like literally an hour and a half or two hours goes by and i like do not hear from him so i like literally did he respond to that text no and so i'm sitting in my apartment on a saturday night sobbing fully hair and makeup done have no plans because this man has like fully stood me up finally responds like two hours later saying sorry fell asleep there's like no follow-up plan there's like nothing else said so then literally i need you to look at these freaking messages because i'm like what he and he because he doesn't follow up with any

other plans and then he just kind of like kept... Did you respond to the fall asleep thing? He did say, OMG, I'm sorry I fell asleep. Okay. But you're right. There was no follow up. I just felt like there maybe should have been a second one of like, when else are you free? Like, da, da, da, da, da. Yes, he did not follow up.

Yeah. But he did reach out on Sunday, high with a wavy hand. With a wavy hand. Still no plans. I didn't hear from you so i made other plans that's what i said because he doesn't need to know that i cried in my apartment alone but why but all right i'm reading this and i'm gonna be totally honest with you like what he did at first was wrong and terrible and dickish did he he had plans like my one advice to you is never accept plans with especially a first date

or in general with a guy who already has plans like he had something else going on and he's like oh i'll call you like when i'm done you should have been like no no no like let's just pick a night when you're like available or free because that's i'm not yeah i mean it was work like it wasn't like whatever okay you know well yeah it was coming like you know i'll call you when i'm done that's like you know if it's the first date when are you available enough to like set up yeah a time and i also felt like it was a bad move on his part because he clearly didn't let me know when he was done. He didn't say I'm leaving the hospital.

He didn't say I'm home. The only reason he told me he was home is because I said, how's work going? But don't like an open-ended plan is not a plan. I'll call you when I'm done. I don't know. I just feel like I'm like frustrated with him in general. And I feel like there's a lack of effort on his part

that I'm like, why? I don't want to put up with this. You haven't met with this guy. No. Okay. I've like never met with him in person. Nick scrolling way up on my phone. Yeah, sorry. I realized this wasn't my phone.

But yeah, once he did this to you, then you're clearly participating in this, what seems to be some sort of game, either intentionally or unintentionally. You're clearly going on your way to not respond to him right away it's kind of obvious that you're waiting to respond you sometimes flat out ignore him then he says hey and then you out of nowhere say what are you doing

here dude like i was just like dude what are we doing here like i'm like because i'm like i don't need all these highs and hey's like what are we doing here no i know but how i i just but that's why i ask a question when you know the answer the answer is why are we doing just you know i don't know so i just let it die you're investing a lot in a guy you haven't met because he essentially flaked on you yeah i kind of just someone who you didn't really say you were interested in yeah i'm like you're not even like cute enough what would you tell me to do ally just be like whatever fuck it i like being alone again the three of us able to educate each other and help each other but not able to help ourselves well because like he's like you're like what do you mean you're like

hey no other plans were met he's like well i'm trying to make plans and he's not going about it in a good way yeah and yes he flayed but then he was like when works for you i offered a time and he was like i'm working and then didn't offer another time like that's the thing i'm like i don't want to be the engine behind this anymore you're right he's he's yes so i guess my question to you is why do you even have a question why is it not should i just be done with him obvious well yeah what's what's the most compelling thing about him nothing yeah it's a lot of energy you're wasting in someone i know because i didn't want to just like cancel and be done and like be like fuck you you fell asleep but it's just like i i feel like then i was waiting for you also don't need to coach him up more plans like this how's this person i mean he's what in his final year of med

school okay that must mean at least like 25 26 so it's clear that he is a not a great communicator and b not going out of his way to make an actual plan with you and even non-planners who are excited make a plan at least for a first date and you don't want to text him and be like explain to an adult man how he should go about doing that and so you just need to accept that he's not doing it for you and move on just be done and yeah there's no point in responding and like the if you respond to him now and you're done just say hey listen it didn't seem like you're all that inch you don't even say that it just seems like he says hey you're just like hey it doesn't seem like it's a match but like best of luck yeah because you you know don't ignore him and uh maybe and and see if he really

comes out of his shell but yeah you're putting a lot of effort into someone who's giving you all the answers already another one bites the dust they're giving you the answers you're just not listening moving on um we have a great episode amelie zilber you're gonna love her if you don't already enjoy amelie thank you so muchelie, thank you so much for coming. Yeah, thank you so much for having me. I'm very excited to have you. I'm a little nervous. You're a very fascinating and accomplished person.

Thank you. At an early stage of your life, I was like reading about you and all that you've done. And then I thought about all the things I've done in my life that I'm older than you. And then I thought about what I was doing, you know, at your age and very impressive.

Comparison is the thief of joy. It is. See another God. It is. But thank you for coming. You, you've obviously we, I want, I have so much to talk to you about

but i do know that off the bat you are very passionate about uh middle eastern politics and relationships i have been watching that 9-11 documentary on netflix i haven't seen that yet you haven't seen my list you should watch i'm curious what you think but it's fascinating because obviously it starts with the 9-11 day of 9-11 and what you think but it's fascinating because obviously it starts with the nine day of 9-11 and the terrorist attacks but it really goes in and then goes back to the russian invasion of afghanistan i know that you uh have been talking about it on your social platforms um and it's really is it's it's fascinating to me because I think it it goes into a lot about you know looking at the other side why things happen I'm a big believer in like cause of fact

I really just believe in physics in the sense that like what but what has drawn you you speak Arabic a little bit I'm learning it in school so I am not well versed in the slightest. More than most. But I guess my big question is what drew you to that? Like, how did someone in your position say, this is a passion project of mine? Yeah, that's a great question. I mean, I really credit my love for Middle Eastern foreign affairs to a history teacher that I had in 10th grade. He was from Israel and he was teaching at the high school that I was going to here in Studio City. And there was kind of this like running joke that he was like part of like the Israeli security force because he's like this really mysterious, like we don't know anything about his past kind of teacher. And the first day of class I was just

like kind of really intrigued by him and I'm the type of person and I am also the type of student where like I just kind of just like confront any situation um like that's just kind of who I am um I don't really hold myself back if I'm interested in about something or about someone so right after class I kind of went up to him after he gave a little summary about what we were learning that year. And I was like, here, this is what I've heard about you. And I know that you're from Israel and I know that you're likely really into Middle Eastern foreign policy. And that's something I don't really know a lot about, but I would love to learn more. And then basically for the following year, like every single day we would go and I'd have lunch with him. I didn't have many friends in high school. So like I would go and have lunch with my teachers and

I would stay late after school and like he would teach me Arabic words and he would help me understand what's happening in the Middle East. And we kind of like cultivated this relationship that was really based on Middle Eastern foreign policy, even though like the class that I was in wasn't about that at all. And I learned from that experience that I could study Middle Eastern foreign policy for hours and hours and hours and hours. And like, I just genuinely didn't even realize time had passed. And I think when you find that you like know it's a passion of yours. So then I would like spend my Saturdays reading things that he would tell me to read.

I would like look up UN, he would look up treaties and whatnot and just like print them out and read them in my room. And I really, it's ironic because I found like validation in myself through that rather than like from other people. Like usually you would think like, oh, I didn't have many friends. I was in my room spending my Saturdays like reading

instead of going to a party or like hanging out with other people. but that experience kind of made me realize that I can validate myself through my own ambitions and passions and um yeah that's how I started and it's obviously progressed since then into now being the major that I'm majoring in in college driving force what is uh not that we're going to spend a whole episode talking about uh middle eastern politics but i mean even dating back to to 9-11 and probably not the 9-11 still affects our society today but i feel like there's a lot of ignorance around the middle east and understanding the culture and and still a lot of again hate and hate and ignorance. What are some things that, as you've learned,

that you try to advocate for or share with your audience to enlighten them and have a better understanding of the Middle East? Yeah, I mean, it's a really interesting question you ask because, and I'm no expert myself, I have only been studying this for a few years like on my own time and in school but um I think the the biggest issue is that when something goes viral on the internet like a like a certain news issue is trending or or whatever and it happens to be in the middle east like there's already all these stereotypes that we have ingrained in our head from what we learn

from like westernized culture and the westernized like uh school systems that we that we grew up in so um a lot of the times we neglect to look at like history and context and and fail to recognize that these issues have been studied for like hundreds of years and or not studied for but like have dated back to hundreds of years ago and people have been studying them for 30 years and they still don't have an answer or like um a really solidified opinion and you know in the age of social media it's really easy to kind of just like look at an issue and read an article about it and be like oh this is where i stand this is like the right this is the right thing and this is the wrong thing um and especially with the middle east like every issue in the middle east is deeply historic and deeply complicated.

And it's just a region that people don't recognize needs a lot of studying to be able to form an opinion on. So maybe the biggest thing is to not judge so quickly. Yeah. Don't take things at surface level value. If you like exciting, if you like new and you like wines, well, let me tell you about Latheweights. A Latheweight wine subscription is an easy way to bring exciting new wines right to your doorstep. Unbox a world of wine with easy access to different and unexpected winemakers from all over the globe.

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that's kind of a something that people should try to apply for all aspects of life. Why didn't you have friends in high school? I think most people find that hard to believe when they hear that. I don't, you know, I don't really know. I have always been

I guess like a little bit more mature like than most kids my age and i would much prefer spending a saturday reading a book with my family than trying a new intoxicating substance with a bunch of other people my age um and i think kind of like the the concept of like like goes with like is something that is applied in high school. And it's like if you're interested in partying and drinking and whatnot, then like you're going to hang out with people who are also interested in that. And that was just not really me. And I think that that was a reason that I didn't have many friends. Like high school is the time to experiment all those things.

And like I just wasn't really into that so did it did that bother you or were you comfortable with your kind of acknowledgement by saying i'm not into this and this is what they want to do did it ever still despite choosing not to partake in that type of activities make you feel lonely or were you totally kind of at peace with you know reading with the family and studying middle eastern politics no i wasn't i mean like it i did i was mature but not mature enough to recognize that what i was doing was like maybe the best thing for me i kind of saw it as like oh no one wants to hang out with me i don't have friends i spent a lot of time being really really sad about it um and you know

friendships is friendships the issue of friendships is something that people struggle with for like their whole life, you know. But I really had a hard time coming to terms with the fact that like I wasn't like no one really wanted to hang out with me that much. So, no, I wasn't I wasn't completely OK with it. It definitely took me time after graduating high school to realize that that's OK. And like that definitely shaped who I am. The reason I'm such an academic and like, I love politics so deeply to my core is because all the time that I spent that I could have spent with friends was spent time like nurturing my mind. And that's something I recognize after, but during the time, no,

I didn't enjoy that. Well, that's hard to say but great to acknowledge yeah uh now that how do you make friends now like what are you looking for like what do you value in friendships and i mean i have found obviously as i've gotten older yeah like some it's it like you said in high school college a lot of it is social activities things like that and and then as you get older you're able to kind of pick and choose your friends look you can be more selective yeah and you're less maybe afraid of what people might you know say or the surroundings how do you go about selecting your friends i'm very selective about who I let into my circle.

And part of that is because I did like go through a lot of bullying in high school. And I recognize that a lot of people who seem to be my friend weren't actually, especially when I started social media, it was really interesting to see how many kids who like genuinely bullied me to my core at high school were then like reaching out to me being

like hey can you promote this or like hey let's go get lunch or you know whatever and and that kind of made me realize that people are not as genuine as they may seem um what were you what were you bullied for so i was bullied for um a myriad of things. First, it was kind of like my weight. I had a lot of, I was like a bit, a bigger kid growing up. And then I kind of recognized that, oh, I want boys to like me. And then I kind of did a complete 180 and like went into an extremely toxic and unhealthy mindset to get to that point when I was in middle school. And then I was bullied for that. So I was bullied for being really big. And then I was bullied for like being the anorexic girl. And then after that, I was bullied for then like not having friends

and then like not, and then being on social media as like the weird girl who had the social media and like a whole bunch of stuff. High school was not fun. I got it in middle school. I've actually, my girlfriend was also bullied a lot in high school and she, similar, told me some stories about, you know, very like mean girl stuff, like tweeting things about them,

putting things in flyers in the hall. And she's been a little bit more in the spotlight recently with us dating and they're all dming yeah they're all reaching out it's i no one could pay me like there's no amount of money i would accept for to go back to high school or middle school or anything like there's just none it was brutal do you think it still has residents and affects you a little bit to this day? Yes, absolutely. Like, I mean, just for one, like I really still keep my circle very, very, very small.

I have about like four friends or five friends that I keep in my circle that like I trust with everything and anything. And then outside of that, like it's just very like friends, like acquaintance level friendships. And I think that really stems to outside of that like it's just very like friends like acquaintance level friendships um and i think that really stems to the fact that like i was bullied in high school and really have a difficult time trusting people not to mention like i have lingering effects that i'm currently in therapy for like with my relationship with food and my relationship with eating because i was bullied about the way that i looked in like my weight for so many transformative years of like my childhood and identity shaping period um so yeah i mean the things that happen to you when

you're like young like you carry with them for the rest of your life yeah until you get them addressed so and even then you're still it's always maintenance yeah yeah master class that's right be a master and whatever it is you want to be and learn from the absolute best that's right anything from dog training to baking to cooking photography filmmaking skateboarding negotiating the list goes on that one of my favorite, The Art of Negotiation. Natalie Portman, acting. Martin Scorsese, filmmaking. If you want to cook, Gordon Ramsey. The point is, clearly, I think we made our point clear that you're learning from the best in whatever it is you want to learn. So the videos are very well done. They're immersive. You can

watch them anywhere. It's the perfect thing to consume while you're traveling. It's definitely better than trying to find something to watch on Netflix. Also, Jesse Krebs is teaching wilderness survival. Fun fact, Chrissy liked it so much. That's why she's quitting the show and becoming a park ranger. So it really can change your life. You can become inspired, become truly a master. And if you've ever wanted to pivot in the career that you don't love, maybe Masterclass will be the launching pad to get you into the woods like Chrissy. I highly recommend you check it out.

It makes a great gift as well. Get unlimited access to every Masterclass. And as a Vilefile listener, you'll get 15% off your annual membership. Go to Masterclass.com slash V-I-A-L-L. That to masterclass.com slash v-i-a-l-l that's masterclass.com slash v-i-a-l-l for 15 off masterclass be a master take a class obviously you have a massive social media platform on on all the platforms how did what made you get into that i have always like i used to do a little bit of modeling and um when i was 15 i was signed i got signed by an agency and i was posting like all these shoots and i grew like a little bit of a following i maybe had like 10 000 followers on instagram or something and then i met this kid who um was like oh you should go on tiktok like

uh you would blow up there so i was like okay um and this was in the summer of 2019 and i kind of just started posting random videos and um i was like kind of growing but like nothing that was ever gonna like transform my life um or like take me away from the career path that i had like so strictly set myself to follow um But yeah, I started posting on social media. I grew a little bit of a following and then COVID hit and I was seeing so much, so many young people kind of like blatantly ignoring the rules of social distancing and like COVID protection measures. And it was really, really angering me. So I took to my social media to kind of explain

why we need to social distance and like what it means, what it does, how it can help and kind of like broke down those issues and saw that that had a positive effect on people of my generation. And then continued to do that with a lot of the upcoming election that was in November and then kind of like every other political issue.

So and then that's how my social media really grew. It's like I became known as the like politics girl on social media. Wow. That's that's kind of fascinating because obviously a lot of people in Gen Z got, you know, like TikTok. It was more about dances and lip syncing. And I mean, I did that at the beginning. Like for sure. That's what I was doing. I quickly realized I am a horrific dancer

and I am just not equipped to like partake in those types of TikTok trends. Respect those who can, but I quickly learned that I can't do that. The way you built your following, especially in the TikTok space and the massive following you have is seems to be very different than the average TikToker. And, you know, you're a beautiful woman,

you're a model as well. And I'm assuming a lot of people might not know anything about you, see your face on social media and make a lot of assumptions about what you're about and who you are. Of course, yeah. It's like constantly trying to push down that narrative. I mean, it's really interesting because it's like when you, something that I'm constantly trying to push on my platform is that like you can be beautiful and love yourself and embrace your appearance while also being super smart and driven

and passionate about whatever you're passionate about. And I feel like we live in a like kind of black or white world where it's very uncommon for people to accept and acknowledge that there can be like someone in the gray space and that there's quite a lot of people in the gray space um so it's constantly a feeling like of trying to prove myself which can be really damaging sometimes because then it kind of all stems back to like, oh, is my worth quite literally only driven by the way that I look? But then I just kind of have to keep telling myself like,

no, my purpose is who I am and what my character is. And maybe my face gets the people there, but the substance comes from within and that's what people stay for. So it's like you come for my face and you stay for my soul. You know what I mean? Yeah, I like that. Do you feel like a lot of young women feel a pressure to maybe even dumb themselves down

because they don't feel confident enough to show the things that they're interested in or their intelligence? Yeah, I mean like when you have to continuously prove that you're more than just a pretty face you have to be like 100 mentally solid that that is the truth you know and that's like a very hard thing to do i i still have doubts sometimes where i'm like oh my gosh am i like totally not equipped to be doing what i'm doing um and i think for and I have the support of like millions of people telling me that I can and for like the average girl like when you aren't

100 solid on a passion or like a purpose or something in your life then yeah sometimes like the only thing you can do is feel the need to dumb yourself down to just be a pretty face to get somewhere um it's it's sad but like if you have something to say you kind of will only be taken seriously unless you are literally like a pro at whatever you're saying or like you're you're beautiful and people are willing to listen to what you have to say it's it's pretty sad one thing i was on your Instagram and I thought it was really cool and really respected about you because I feel like, and I think everyone deals with to a certain degree,

kind of like you're talking, but there's a balance between believing yourself and having confidence and I'm good at this, I'm smart or I'm physically talented in sport, whatever the skill level is, but the humility and also the confidence to recognize that you don't know everything

and to ask more questions. Yeah. And you like to bring in experts to help you discuss certain things. And while that might seem like an obvious, I don't think it is for a lot of people especially on social media with tiktok and and everyone wants to be the expert everyone wants to sound like they're the smartest person in the room and are reluctant to bring someone in who

might know more than them where does that come from and at such an early age in your life that kind of recognition to both you know want to let the people know you know what you're talking about yeah but the willingness to have the humility to say i don't know everything let's bring in someone who knows even more about this like you know you did a video go video video about the conflict and the recent events in afghanistan and i thought that was really interesting. Yeah. I mean, like, to be completely honest, the reason I do that is because the aim and intent of what I do is to educate young people, right? So my pure goal is not necessarily to make myself be the smartest in the room or like

the most successful or whatever. My goal is to get young people to actually give a shit about what's happening in the world around them. And for for some videos when I'm kind of just simplifying something just really fast so young people can know what's going on I do a great job at that like I can summarize it in a minute I am really well versed in like gathering different sources and making sure the material that I present to my audience is clear and true and fact-based. But the goal is to get young people to care and to know the truth of what's happening. And for me, an issue like Afghanistan that is so deeply historic and deeply complex, I made a one-minute video, which was great. It simplifies it in a minute. But then when I want people to actually care, I talk to an expert who can provide a lot more insight, who can educate me, who can educate everyone listening.

And that's simply because the goal is to get young people to learn, you know? Yeah. It's not a personal motivation. It's a community motivation. And is that how you started? Is it two-minute times? Yeah. Yeah, tell us about that.

Yeah, I will tell you all about that. So when I was 12, I started this thing called the two-minute times. What that um so when i was 12 i started this thing called the two minute times and it was what was i doing i was 12 i mean you it was a weirdo i don't know i grew up in a really you think it's weird i mean i was it was weird at the time like i was the only 12 year old yeah unique was a unique um so at the dinner table we would always talk about politics my mom my brother and myself we would always talk about politics and like i literally had no idea what was going on whenever we would talk about things like the russian invasion of ukraine or uh you know you know like just just current events happening at the time and um i am a competitive person and i would

look at my brother and be like i'm gonna take you down can't believe you know more than me and you're outshining me in front of my mother um and i went to go talk to a bunch of people in like my classes in my sixth grade little community like what's going on and they gave me nothing so i decided to research and so like you're at recess they're playing kickball you're like guys do we know what's going on in Russia? No, literally. And I mean, like it's not their fault. Like I didn't like, you know, 12 year old is supposed to know the details about what's

happening in the world around them. But basically, I was like, OK, I'm going to I am going to have to educate myself. And I was reading all these articles. And I was I learned that like it's so hard for a young person to be able to understand what's being written in these like really advanced news articles that are they're just hard to read and hard to learn from and hard to understand especially when you're young so I decided to create the too many times which was a weekly newsletter that I sent out for seven years um or actually six and a half I ended when I was halfway through my halfway

through being 18. And I basically would just take the top three to five stories like weekly news stories and break it down in a couple of sentences each story just so that young people could know what's going on and understand the world in a really summarized but like fun young way. I would like add puns and colors and I would just make it fun to read for young people. But then I ended up just doing that until I did it from 12 to 18. And that's kind of how I learned

how to like take a lot of sources and break down information. And it really helped me for what I'm doing now because I know how to summarize an event in the news. But yeah, that's what the two minute times is that's great and what do you what are your goals with that or I guess what are your I kind of hate this question people ask me yeah like five year but you're going to Georgetown you are studying politics you're passionate about it like what would a dream job be for you

um I don't know I mean it changes every day i used to think that i wanted to work in a think tank and like actually be behind the scenes making policy for u.s foreign affairs in the middle east like that was my goal 100 and then i recognized that my voice on social media has like a unique power i i can get people to listen to what I have to say. And with that, my goals are constantly changing. I could see myself maybe having like a political talk show or just, I don't know, something on screen. Run for office? You know, a woman who used to work in the Obama administration told me that I should.

You know, a woman who used to work in the Obama administration told me that I should. And I had never thought about it before then because that just gives me the ultimate like fear of all fears. Like everyone looking into you. Yeah. And just like using my old, old 2019 TikTok dancing videos as like ammunition against me. I wonder, I feel like that's just the world. Yeah. I mean, that's the world we're entering.

Yeah. I mean, I think a future president, whether it's you or someone else is going to have compromising videos. And I don't mean like, you know, cancelable offenses, but like they might be doing kind of a weird. Yeah.

I mean, for sure. Like funny joke. Of course, I mean, for sure. Like funny joke. Of course. It's awkward. And they're just going to have to deal with that on the campaign trail. Yeah. I mean, it's it's it's it's the future.

So, I mean, when she told me that, I was kind of like, oh, maybe. I don't know, though. It's running for office is a very scary thing. I don't know if I'm equipped for that. Also, I don't ever want to feel like I have to compromise my morals to win something you know yeah that was kind of my next question do you think do you think i once had a mentor uh who used to work for a senator and he just said he's like you know what there's only one job yeah and that job is to get reelected yeah i mean it's it's the deeply sad reality of american politics is that we focus so much more on getting reelected than actually making change in this country.

And I don't feel like I could ever run for office if that was kind of a sacrifice that I had to make. Yeah. goal is kind of being a think tank and focusing on policy that might i feel like could get discouraging because here you are you're kind of behind the scenes thinking of all these ideas and policy presenting them to whoever the decision makers and influences are and now you you are in fact literally an influencer through your social media platform and you can in fact advocate and have impact on real change yeah i mean that's that's always been the goal is to create change um whether it was behind the scenes and my face wasn't a part of it at all or you know posting videos that were that had the aim of getting people to know about something like the goal has always changed whether or not i'm at the i'm the face of it or not like the goal is to get people to care and to

make change happen in this country because there's so much more that needs to be done you must get discouraged yes because you want i get discouraged a lot i mean i i just have a silly podcast and i am trying to advocate for ideas and have people see the other side. A lot of it is relationship driven. And it just gets discouraging, especially if you pay attention to critics. And it's like you want feedback. Yeah. Right.

But then how do you take that feedback and decide whether it's helpful useful or just hate i mean that's the question i think that we like every person on social media has to constantly ask themselves for me personally when it comes to talking about politics i've had so many years of like actually studying politics and issues that I've been able to make an opinion that is so solid to my morals that like what others have to say about it holds no value because I'm so sturdy in my belief system. But when it comes to topics that I don't know a lot about and I'm kind of like forced to research it for the week prior before I make a video, or I'm just like talking about something I'm not 100% confident I'm solid about, of course, like I get discouraged and I read people's comments and I'm

like, oh dear, like, did I say something wrong? Should I take it down and continue researching? I mean, it's like normal. It's part of the process. But I mean, you just have to be confident in yourself. That's something I'm trying to learn like right now is that like i have to believe in myself if i ever want to be anyone and do something with my life like i just have to believe in myself yeah i try to tell myself too that if i'm doing my job yeah if i'm at least upsetting some people yeah Yeah. And not because I'm ever deliberately trying to upset anyone. I try so hard not to. Yeah. And I always try to be genuine. Like everything I say, I believe I believe it.

Yeah. So to speak. And my mind can be changed. Yeah. And I might mess up, so to speak. But I'm doing my job if I can get people to think. And often I realize that part of getting part of triggering people and getting them to consider an alternative point of view

requires for you to first ruffle their feathers or get them to consider something that they have an identity or attachment to yeah for sure you know we had Dr. Maya, a behavioral scientist who also worked for the Obama campaign, talk a lot about that recently. And yeah, and that can that can be challenging, but also just really discouraging, especially when you care about what you do. Yeah, for sure. I mean, I can only imagine like relationships are so deeply like a like, I guess, connected to the way that you perceive yourself and like the way that you exist in this world and like everything you've experienced as a child like is also attached to like the way that you form relationships and how you interact with people in relationships so i can

imagine that people who like are constantly on the defense about the way that they behave in relationships can be really like tough i mean yeah like like, yeah, having someone, I don't know. I can't put it into words, but I know exactly what you're saying. And it's hard to realize. It's kind of like going to therapy. It's hard to realize that something you're doing is wrong or bad or that someone that you love is doing something that's wrong or bad. It's hard.

Yeah. Yeah. I was watching, I've been watching Sex and the City. Have you ever watched? Oh, of course i just my girlfriend got me into it and i i love it yeah it's amazing i'm passionate about it but i love it for because i was like carrie bradshaw is so toxic and terrible friend and i mentioned that and a lot of people agreed but also a lot of people very upset yeah because well they see themselves in carrie and carrie's just

like everyone else she's imperfect and and has a lot of admirable qualities but also a terrible friend terrible dater horrible picker yeah i mean did you finish this i haven't finished no miranda just had a baby oh okay uh we love that for her. The writers hate Miranda. They do. It's sad. They hate her. Yeah. She got chlamydia. She's the one who's farting all the time.

Like, they hate her, and she's truly the best. Yeah, she's a hard worker. She's a hard worker. She's a good person. She makes the best decisions for herself. Yeah. Anyway, I'm getting off. I mean, you know, being that character isn't the like sexiest character, so to say. I was on your Twitter and in your picture, your, I don't know, what is it?

Profile? Intersexual feminism. Am I saying that right? Yes. Intersectional. And I feel like I know a little bit what that was. Allie and I looked it up. Interesting topic.

You must be passionate about it to put it on your Twitter. I mean, I'm just, I'm just passionate about issues that have to do with women, of course, and making sure that it isn't, you know, white women

as the ones who are like getting all of the feminist attention, you know, because intersectional feminism is all about like making sure that the the things that we fight for are all intersectional you know so it's whether it's like um racial issues and female like feminist issues like making sure that those are intertwined and connection connected and uh not separating them as two completely separate things, but making sure that we're fighting for them.

Yeah, I like that because I was thinking about it too because I think a lot of times whatever we attach ourselves to, like if it's feminism and you're a woman or even a guy supporting it, I think we sometimes look at how it impacts us. Oh, for sure. And I think sometimes we forget that some of these isms or concepts that we are trying to advocate for change are more about having empathy for everyone involved yeah is that where that comes from yeah i mean i mean just kind of a side note is is this like what i've realized by being someone who talks about politics and social justice

issues online is that like so many people lack empathy for others. Um, it's very scary. Empathy is going the wrong way. Yeah. It's very, it's, it's actually incredibly frightening and very sad to see is that,

um, unless you are like being affected, like you just, you literally don't care that's why like not to make this all political but like why so many people voted for and i don't know your political beliefs and i don't mean to upset you but like uh that's why i feel like so many people voted for trump in the election was because um you know it was a very like self like self-motivated vote you know if it's it's it's you're voting for someone who's going to

benefit you like individually rather than the entire community at large the entire population of america like the people in poverty the people struggling the people who are oppressed in this country yeah so there's just like a lack of empathy i think when it comes to to all these issues in general yeah no i think there's just a lack of empathy in that regard, in life, on the street, on social media. And I think everyone is guilty to a certain degree. Absolutely. Yeah, I think social media has made us all more selfish and self-centered.

Oh, for sure. And that leads to all our choices in life um being a part of gen z um what are it's a very kind of act i think it's an as much of as any young generation is the most activist type of generation i think you know, the youth generally is more prone to be activists and for change, but Gen Z more than anyone before. What are, as you look at Gen Z, what do you think they're really good at? And what do you think are maybe some weaknesses of Gen Z that they could maybe, you would like to see them do a better job? Yeah, I mean, it's a really interesting question that you ask because, I mean, I'm at fault for the things that I'm going to say weaknesses are.

You know, like I play a part in contributing to the weaknesses. But I mean, I think one of the best things about Gen Z and their desire to be active and engaged in the political world is that they are simply like willing to be vocal about their beliefs, not really caring about what others have to say about it, but knowing that if they believe something is morally right and true, then they're going to speak out about it. And that's beautiful. I don't think we've seen a lot of that in the past. And social media makes that such a more powerful, has such a more powerful effect on that because it can be reverberated across millions of different people like towards millions of different people the weakness i would say is maybe just like a lot of the times i've seen that people can kind of like shove ideas down other people's throats and they're not willing to have a conversation it's kind of like if you're

having a conversation or trying to have a conversation with someone from an opposite political spectrum of you, it's very much clash, not communication, which can be really damaging. I would hope to see in the future that we can kind of like have civil conversations about issues because that's the only way we will actually get somewhere rather than just putting fire towards fire does that make any sense no it does yeah um and i like that you mentioned yeah conflict and not conversation yeah and it's not just nz it's i think it's everyone to a certain degree you're in a public relationship yes you mentioned it his name's blake yes um he you mentioned he's also a tiktoker a character um you know i come from a space uh like the when i bachelor world where you know you're in a relationship we've

talked about on the show there's a currency in that um how do you or do you ever feel pressure well how do you separate that from affecting your relationship? And have you ever caught you and Blake doing things out of character because you thought that's what your audience expected of you or wanted you? And how do you guys manage that? Or do you prioritize? Or do you think about that? That's such a good question. It's really interesting having like a public relationship

online uh because everything you do and say is like magnified times a thousand um blake and i are really good about like kind of keeping our personal relationship personal and only sharing tidbits of our life to social media i would say that a lot of our followers know genuinely like nothing about our relationship but the fact that we are in a relationship, which I think is like great to be honest, because then there are no expectations to like uphold an image of something simply because they don't have an image of us that we feel the need to uphold. It's kind of like we're together. We have a fun reputation online and a really private one.

So I would say no to the fact that there needs to be a character that needs to be played. I don't feel that way at all, but I will say that having a relationship on social media can be really tricky in the sense that you have to make sure that your relationship doesn't become like the two people in the relationship in the same industry don't like start to compete with each other it's really hard like being in the same industry sometimes we're fighting for the same jobs and like fighting to make the same connections which can actually be like really toxic and difficult to handle yeah i mean shit i wasn't in a public relationship in my early 20s.

And I've never had a relationship until the current one I have now where we weren't competing or I felt like there was, you know, so it doesn't even have to be a public platform or social media. I think that's a challenge for young couples or people in any relationship to compete with each other, especially if they're both competitive people and that can be a challenge. It's tough, but at the end of the day,

like separating work from your personal relationships is really, really important. How long have you guys been dating? Our one year was like a week ago. So you guys like, happy anniversary. Thank you. Is it love?

Yes. I mean, like I do love him and he loves me. First love? This is my first love, my first relationship. I'm 19 years old,

so I would, couldn't say that. Never know. I mean, there's a lot of, there's a lot of people 19 on their fourth. That's true. fourth serious relationship.

So you never really know. When I was 19, 20, and I was in love, I came, you know, I'm from Wisconsin. I came from a very kind of traditional household. My parents were my role models. They got married at an early age. I don't know what your parents story is but do you think and i think also like gen z they seem to be more independent less traditional more willing to also maybe it's a result of social media that their influence isn't just coming from

their smaller community and their community being their parents for sure with you and blake dating uh when i was 19 and 20 we were already talking about like this and we you know we're in love so if we're in love and we're dating yeah i guess we should start talking about like do we want to get married someday you know and things like that and i think a lot of even today a lot of young couples will feel a pressure either self-inflicted or by society, to say, you're my number one priority. You're my everything. If it's true love, then we're all that. Do you feel that pressure?

How do you two still prioritize all your personal ambitions, of which you, I don't know him, you clearly have a lot of? personal ambitions of which you, I don't know him, you clearly have a lot of. And are you okay with acknowledging maybe we're not each other's top priority and that's okay because we're still 19, 20 years old? Yeah, I mean, for him and I, we have a kind of like cute way to go about it.

It's kind of like we spend our day getting shit done right we don't really communicate throughout the day like we kind of just focus on what we have to do and we live like two separate lives kind of and then at night we like spend quality meaningful time together and i think that's kind of like the best way to do it because we recognize that when we're working we're not each other's top priority but when we're not working like we make each other a priority um i think that's kind of like the best way that we do it um yeah that's like a short answer to a long question but but do you guys even think about like do you think about marriage and kids at this point in your life because i mean yeah i did when i was younger and then i look back and go why did i even bother yeah i mean it's fun to think about that stuff like sometimes i'll like be on pinterest and i'm like oh my god look at this pretty wedding

dress i'm gonna wear this on our wedding day but then at the same time like like i'm not having kids until i'm over the age of 30 like i i very much plan to make my life a priority before anything else. I want to make sure that like my happiness is at the forefront of my life. If Blake and I are together for another like 15 years and we get married and have a kid, like that's awesome. Like I love him and I love, I would love that. But ultimately there's no pressure that we have to like stick to a timeline or stick to like a goal sheet like you know like it's not like crossing off things on a list for us it's like we go through life together and and it's beautiful and it's fun and we love it and there's no pressure you know it sounds like you guys are good at setting boundaries yeah relationship

yeah yeah it took me a long time to learn the importance of that speaking of boundaries like what are some of the things that you guys have set for yourself like uh for example a thing that's pretty common are questions we get asked in terms of and i don't know if there's there's i don't i personally don't think there's right or wrong answers it's just about the relationship and what you guys agree but social media being what it is and you guys both being public figures you're both good looking people you're both sought after yeah uh what is your stance on or do you even talk about you two say following other people yeah uh having friends of the opposite sex do you guys pay

attention to who each other follows and you know a lot of people like a lot of if you don't know him or know her why are you following her or do they have to follow you back what is your stance on stuff like that i mean it's a fun it's like a funny question because at the beginning of our relationship like in the first like month or whatever um i could tell that he was following like a lot of beautiful women and i i was i didn't ever say anything but i was kind of like, it's kind of fishy. But no, like he's. That's the most chill response to that.

Someone noticing that. It's kind of fishy. Yeah. I mean, I mean, like ultimately, like the way that I see it is like I am a gift. Right. I am a gift and he is lucky to have me. And like if I don't care if he follows other girls like i really don't um but like if he ever like takes advantage of that and he then he loses me and that's his fault you know what i mean like i feel like i'm like i have that boundary for myself and and he knows

that and like the same thing with me like we wouldn't ever jeopardize our relationship because we genuinely have such like a it's like two best friends that are like in love like we just like chill out and we love each other and it's just like it's just a great relationship that i feel like none of us even have like concerns about the other uh abusing like the fact that we like have other uh friendships of the same sex you know what i mean like yeah no that's great yeah i mean but a lot of people sweat the small stuff yeah i mean for sure it i mean at the end of the day it comes from a place of like insecurity in yourself um i like i don't have that fear because like i know my worth as a human being and i know that he's lucky to have me and i know the same that i'm lucky to have him too but like

i have that where where does that come from because I think about parenting and being a dad and if there's anything I want to teach my kids is that you know how do you set boundaries with them without having them be rebellious and I thought to myself well I just want to teach self-worth and the belief in yourself is that something your parents instilled in you? Because yeah, obviously you're smart and talented and good looking. And a lot of people would look at you and say, of course she's confident, but like we all know, and you've talked about some of your struggles, right? You know, bullying, struggles with diets, friends. We all have a lot of reasons to be insecure. Where does that knowing you're a gift and holding whoever you lead into your,

bring into your life accountable for living up to the expectation come from? That's such a good question. I don't really know. I think it's taken me like a long time to get here. I read a lot of like self-help books. I'm a big reader. I think you can probably like gather that by now.

But I read a lot of like self-help books and confidence books. And I have people in my life who I trust more than anything and who have given me the support system I need to recognize my worth as a human being. Part of the reason, like part of the consequence of like, I wouldn't even say it's a consequence, I think it's a good thing. But part of not having a humongous circle of friends and quite literally only having four or five people that I really trust and value with everything in me is that they are such a strong support system for me. And they help me realize that I have immense worth as a human being.

So I really accredit it to the other people in my life that I trust and love. Telling you that. That's great. If you ever had a friend who was dating someone you didn't like, how would you go about that? I've had that before. At the end of the day, like it's really not, it's not my place. Like if you're happy and you're in love, who am I to like shit on that? Do you know what I mean?

As long as like someone isn't being emotionally abused, verbally abused, physically abused, like it's not my place. You live and you learn. Like the lessons that you go through are ones that life is throwing at you because you need to grow as a human being. And I'm there when you need me and I'm here to support you. But as long as like there's literally no like there's nothing dire that's happening like it's your responsibility to

like recognize that do you know what i mean i do no it's great but it's like tough love but i mean it's kind of who i am what is something about your parents um that you really admire about the relationship and then what's something about your parents um that you really admire about the relationship and then what's something about your parents that well great parents you love them that you're like you know what i might want to do it differently because i've learned i have an answer to not do that yeah so my parents are divorced they got divorced when i was four um and what i love about them is that they despite not even being together anymore, have, like, such a great relationship. We spend Christmases together.

We spend birthday dinners together. We have, like, family dinners all the time, which is incredible because I get to experience both, like, my mom and my dad, like, as a coherent family unit despite them not being together. my mom and my dad like as a coherent family unit despite them not being together it may be once every three months but um i love that i don't have like a really negative view on relationships because of my parents like if they hated each other i would probably have a different set of issues that i don't currently have um so i really admire that and something I don't ever want to do is they had a very much like love at first sight kind of relationship. They got engaged after like three months of being together and got married right away. And then they were married for 15 years. But I think the biggest downfall was that they didn't take the time to like realize if they were like meant to be with each other.

like realize if they were like meant to be with each other um so i think that's the only thing i would not want to like uh duplicate is just like taking time and recognizing that this person is like going to fit into my life in a really positive way rather than yeah not do you i mean you you you're enrolled in georgetown you're taking a gap gap semester semester so you're enrolled in Georgetown, you're taking a gap semester. So you're living here. Blake lives here. You're going to Georgetown. Have you guys talked about the long distance and how you're going to handle that? Is that something you get worried about or he worries about? Yeah.

How do you stop letting your insecurities create current conflict that's not even here yet? Yeah, that's a great question. We were sort of talking i ended up not going literally like three days before because i i realized that my i would just uh like break down as a human being if i was doing that on top of everything else that i'm doing um like moving across the country and and everything would have like made me like a troubled human being. But anyways, we were talking a lot about how like we were going to do it, but we weren't talking about it so extensively

because like we kind of have this existing trust in each other that like nothing would happen. Yeah, it would be tough, but I have been on like trips before where I'm gone for two weeks and then I come home and I see him or like I'm gone for a while and I don't really even have the time to text him or anything. But we come back and everything's fine. So I think that like when I was going to move, we were definitely going to be able to make it work. And we weren't worried about making it work because my work anyways requires me to be like in LA constantly or, you know, traveling different

places constantly. So it was kind of like, well, we'd see each other probably once every two or three weeks. And in that case, it's not like such an intense long distance, like four to six months kind of thing. So it wasn't like a huge worry on our minds. We were kind of just like, oh, I don't want to not spend every day with you, you know? Yeah. Are you more introverted than extroverted? Yes, You know? Yeah. Are you more introverted than extroverted?

Yes. Very much so. Same. Yeah. Another thing I've focused, like I'd never, and maybe that's just society and social media, but I think being introverted is something that people acknowledge now.

Like we had Susan Cain on our podcast who wrote the book on being an introvert. But it was something that for the longest time in my life, the introverted aspects that I had, I would dismiss or when people would be like, oh, you're a little bit of an introvert. I'd be like, no, I'm not. I'd get very defensive about that.

Of course, yeah. Is that different now and for gen z people that are more open to um the acknowledgement of not being a certain way i think back in the day you know our society was literally told it's better to be extroverted it's better to be right-handed it's like it's better to do x y and z and i feel like we're just as a society a little more open to being different being weird or whatever and or or is that not the case or or is it still people are afraid to acknowledge being an introvert i uh can't speak for other people but for myself like i was always really i always thought it was like such a flex to be like I'm an extrovert, you know. I thought it was like not cool to be an introvert at all, which I mean like when you're young, I guess it isn't, you know.

Like I guess just people like young kids seem to think that like being an extrovert. I mean you get to play with more people and, you know, be a more like a friendly child, I guess, if you're like more extroverted. So that's why I think maybe when we're younger, that's why why but i think the pandemic really made me like okay with being an introvert i realized that um it was such a relief like not having to go places and be around people i didn't actually like and putting on this facade of of enjoying my time away from like home but your energy was yeah that's one thing i've learned like i learned from susan is this like it's more about how you like extroverts will actually get energy yeah from social interactions and extroverts have to spend

energy so there's like a currency so like and i don't know about you i like parties i like going out i like social events but how i use that energy is very valuable to me yes because i have a finite amount amount of it i mean i like honestly never leave my house and like when i do i'm very present and i'm very much there because i have like three weeks of like padding to kind of like make that like experience okay um no i i like really don't leave my house unless i absolutely need to um i don't feel the need to like say yes to a bunch of social social situations because like i'm not on the hunt for like more friends or like like i'm just not like desperate for anything so i'm kind of like okay being like no i'm not gonna go to

that when it's like a work thing and i have to go like i muster up the energy and i do what i have to do and i kind of like have to fake it sometimes um which is fine but ultimately i only like go to things and do things with people i like and only do like experience that i experiences that i know i will come out like having enjoyed so yeah is blake more of an extrovert oh for sure like he's like life of the party loves to go out loves to have fun and it's good for me because he definitely like gets me out more than i otherwise would um but i think i also kind of like tame him in a little like bring him in and and i we really balance each other out in a great way so who's the drama queen in your relationship honestly both of us like for completely different things like sometimes

i'm crazy over dramatic no i'm not crazy but i'm like over dramatic um i'm crazy over dramatic and uh i kind of just it's funny because i'm like if like he kind of knows that like if i'm being if i'm like upset over something like sometimes he's like are you actually mad or do you just want me to give you like a lot of hugs and kisses and he just like knows that sometimes i just want attention and i'm not actually upset about something so i can definitely be like a drama queen in that way um but then other times he's the exact same way and i know kind of like when he just wants more attention and he's the drama queen so we both are it sounds like you guys have a really great relationship and there's a lot of recognition of immaturity and i mean you guys are lucky because shit man a lot of people don't have that yeah regardless of well that's

their is it his first serious relationship no No, he's been in a bunch. But they like, from what I, yeah, no, he's been in a lot. How are you with like, are you good with exes? Oh, I don't care. Like, I mean, I, maybe I'm just like, like, I don't know. Maybe I'm just like so self-aware that I like should be caring more about this stuff. But I just like genuinely don't like he still follows his exes. I don't care. Like a lot of people do.

Yeah. I mean, like I don't have an issue with any of them. I'm kind of like, OK, they taught you things that you are have now learned and like are now bringing to my relationship. And all I can say is like, I'm grateful for that. But that's it. Like you're with me. You're not with them. I don't really care. You know what I mean? OK, so final question before you play our game. Do you know me? say is like i'm grateful for that um but that's it like you're with me you're not with them i

don't really care you know what i mean okay so final question before you play our game do you know me uh having had this conversation with you you clearly have a lot of perspective okay thank you you're 19 years old and if i when i if i get to be a parent, the only thing I really want to teach my kid is perspective at an early age. I lacked perspective when I was younger. My lack of perspective caused me to invest just so much energy into things that didn't matter. even if it was like heartbreak or failure, I would exaggerate the impact it had on my life as a lack of perspective. I guess I'm thankful for it at that point because so much of what I talk about on my show and are asked Dick is I'm just trying to offer people perspective

about a situation they might not about seeing, but where does that come from? Like, I mean, it's not just that that you're smart because a lot of smart people lack perspective where does you know i'm just i'm fascinated by the level of perspective you have and all these things i'm asking you and i'm like it makes so much sense but i think people take for granted the perspective you have and i'm just fascinated like where does it come from and i'm just want to steal it away because like if it was something you were taught i want to take that and teach.

Because I don't know how to, it's hard to teach. Yeah, for sure. Like, you have to live it sometimes. My mom is my superwoman. And she, you know, went to therapy for years to kind of unlearn the toxic parenting habits that were taught to her when she was little. And I think kind of like the most important thing is like you have to go to therapy before you become a child, before you become a parent to kind of like unlearn all of the really toxic parenting traits that were like passed down to you. Yeah, I think I honestly think that's why like she has a lot of perspective

because she went to therapy for years. And therapists are like just you know they give you all the tools to be able to have perspective um i think that's a huge reason why i also think that you know um i used to go to therapy when i was uh like a teenage like uh like 13 to 15 because i was going through a lot of uh problems with a family member and um that taught me a lot of perspective. I learned kind of like a lot of like little tools and nuggets of wisdom, like not responsible for that person's feelings. And yeah, I mean, therapy is the answer. Okay, great.

So just send them off to therapy. No, it's really something. I have an actual memory of perspective and I got it from my, my grandma Phyllis and it was, you know, she's my grandmother and she just was like, she was just trying to tell me just how much life I had left to live. Yeah. And I just never, just even that idea that there's so much more to live for, that things just, everything I, like, tomorrow is going to happen

and there's so many more tomorrows. Yeah. And I was 25. Yeah. And that was the first time I even considered the possibility of perspective. Yeah. So congrats to you and your mom and having it figured out much sooner than most people ever do.

Yeah, I'm lucky I have her as my mom. Amelie, this has been a lot of fun. Yes. Are you done to play a fun, quick, easy game before I let you go? Let's do it. It's called Do You Know Me? Real simple.

I'm going to ask you some questions. Has Amelie ever done this? Okay. Do you do that? Okay. Yes or no answers are fine. Okay. Anecdotal stories are welcomed.

Okay. But totally fine if you don't have one. Perfect. Do You Know Me with Amelie Zilber. Question number one. Has Amelie ever muted one of their friends on Instagram? Yes. I would have guessed yes just because

specifically for that mute yeah i don't know yeah they don't know you don't have to deal with it you obviously cherish your mental health above all things yes and while friends are great sometimes they're shitty yep it's a boundary for yourself. Yeah. Question number two. Allie, pick these out. Okay. Let's also say that Nick loves to give disclaimers when we play this game so that no one drags him. It's smart. I'm not.

It's smart. Every time we play. This is more of a gender thing. Like maybe this is something. She can know I picked it. I got you. Okay okay has amelie ever peed in a bottle um no but i have peed on the side of a cliff before when my boyfriend took me uh what's it called uh it's like you when you drive on like rocky mountains atving i don't know what it's called we don't know what it's called but i had to pee and we

were in the middle of nowhere and i was like all right fuck it yeah do it like do you i had to women have to consider wind as well as men when it's really hard the aim is like a hard thing i had to i got locked out of my house in high school one time so i was like in my garage and i was like i either go out in the snowbank and pee or i try and aim into this apple juice container and i made it but it was difficult yeah it's a hard thing it's hard yeah it doesn't sound easy thank you for your honesty you're welcome does amelie know the pythagorean theorem pythagorean pythagorean pythagorean pythagorean i have a speaking problem that's okay but you know i'm talking about yes do you know pythagorean pythagorean pythagorean pythagorean yes i have a speaking problem that's okay but you know i'm talking about yes do you know pythagorean theorem pythagorean theorem

um i definitely learned that in school that's why i know the word it's a math thing but i'm not i i don't i was opted out of math in school because i'm studying politics so i don't have to take that one's questioning your intelligence even if you get it wrong a squared plus b squared equals c squared this might be a hipah violation has amelie ever had surgery yes i have i um had to go to the hospital three times this past year i had three different things happen to me you okay yeah i think it was like 100% stress induced. Stress is a bugaboo. Yeah. How do you deal with stress?

What are your go-to remedies? Well, first I cry. Okay. Like first and foremost. And then I read quotes about how I'm going to be okay. And then I'm like, okay, no, I'm going to be fine. And then I spend time with my dogs and i read a book and then i'm like oh i'm gonna be good how many dogs do you have i have two and then my boyfriend

has a third that i claim as my own i just before you came i just found out my dog jeff uh lift his leg to pee for the first time and i feel like a parent who just moves their kids first yeah no it's it's sad i didn't get to see, I mean, the boyfriend, my boyfriend has a dog, a new dog, and I didn't get to see it either. And I claim it as my own, so I was very sad to hear that. Has Amelie ever called the police? Oh, no.

Okay. I did get pulled over once, though. But I was crying, and they let me go. That tracks. I was fully sobbing in my car. It was the night before my birthday and it was like one of those like DUI checkpoints to see like, I don't know,

like they just have them and a bunch of cars have to go through them and I was just like sobbing. Birthdays are just very stressful for me. Why so? Same. Yeah, I don't know know like i just feel like there's such an expectation to like have the best day ever and then i don't and then i hate everyone and everything and i hate my life your perspective's great do you feel the same about new year's eve yes i do i do do you get awkward with attention? It depends.

Sometimes yes, sometimes no. If I feel like I look really pretty, then no, I don't. I'm like, yay, everyone's looking at me. Or if I have something really interesting to say, I'm like, I am smart. But then otherwise, I'm like, please don't look at me. Again, I didn't select this one has amelie ever taken a pregnancy test no but i did her hear a really scary fact about birth control that when you're on the pill just because you get your period doesn't mean you're not pregnant it's like a fake period did you know that i didn't know that well because it's like you can like spot it's basically like when you get your

period on any form of birth control like getting your period is kind of like mowing the lawn in a way and then you have like your clippings but like the lawn hasn't grown so like there's really no clippings yeah it's it's like a fake period basically induced by your hormones um so like you can still be fully pregnant and have your period from birth control dude it's like my biggest fear is like i can't believe i'm pregnant or whatever that tlc yeah i didn't know i was pregnant you're like like literally they're like you're eight and a half months along that's horrible has omelie eaten mcdonald's in the past week oh no not in the past week you eat mcdonald's uh i love myself a big large iced full of ice diet coke it just hits different it does my girlfriend i don't like why

no mcdonald's filters the water that becomes their ice. So that's like specifically good. Like their ice specifically is better than any other. I'm going to stop for one today. There's a McDonald's right there. I should too. Yeah. I was thinking of one of the movies and maybe I'll. You'd like the taste of Diet Coke over regular Coke? Yes.

Regular Coke is foul. What? I don't. Natalie feels the same. I don't get it. I don't get it. Regular Coke is foul. What? Natalie feels the same. I don't get it. I don't get it. I find Diet Coke to be foul, but you teach their own. You like pee questions, Allie.

It's just it comes naturally, you know. Does Amelie pee? Has Amelie ever peed in a pool? Oh, of course I have. Not something I'm proud of, but, you know know when you're young and you don't really care like although i do say i never pee in the shower i don't like i don't obviously don't pee in pools anymore but like i cannot pee in the shower i find it i have grotesque i love peeing the shower wait wait what you like get two things done it's like two in one shampoo conditioner it's just done it's over yeah that's gross also like i mean i get i feel like for women there's a lot of skin cut like yes like

as guys can i'm gonna wash it anyways god that's true but i can't do that i'm also like am i standing on it i don't know that's what the drain is for. All right. Final question. Has Amelie ever broken into her own house? Yes, I have. I went through the doggy door because I was locked out. It was very late at night and I had to squeeze myself through the dog door. And then I told my mom I did that.

And then she like changed the location of the dog door and where the door handle was on the door because she realized that if i could do it someone else could do it i lied and then have you ever committed a crime uh no misdemeanor of any kind i don't know i don't need you to name said crime no i haven't i haven't at least not intentionally i did actually take a mascara once but like i totally didn't realize and then i told my mom like right after i was like oh did we buy this and she was like no i was like crime mother daughter duo evil villains uh amelie thank you so much it's been such a delight talking to you uh can you let my audience know where they can find you on social for all the people who aren't already following you uh let them know and all the other find you on social for all the people who aren't already

following you uh let them know and all the other things you want them to check out and the work that you're doing yeah so um thank you so much for having me i actually really enjoyed this this was super fun um my instagram is at omelie zilber same with my tiktok um same with my youtube it's just my first and last name. You can find me anywhere. And just keep eyes open for a really special show that I have coming out all about issues that matter to Gen Z. Amazing. Well, congrats on all your success. Again, I can't talk. That's okay. Really awesome to talk with you. You're an awesome inspiration to Gen Z and every generation. And if you're looking for perspective, pay attention to Amelie. She seems to have a lot of it.

Thanks for listening, guys. Don't forget to send in your questions at asknickatcastmedia.com. Cast with a K for Ask Nick episodes. If you are tuning in to listen to Amelie, welcome to our podcast. Check out more episodes. We're in the 300s. If you're like listening to relationship and dating stories, people calling in with their problems, concerns, and hearing more perspective and an honest interpretation of those challenges, check us out on Mondays. And we have other great public figures like Amelie on Wednesdays.

And if you're a fan of reality TV, we break down The Bachelor when it's on. Thanks for listening. Have a great day. See you back on Monday.