The Viall Files - E335 Bachelorette Recap With Jim Jefferies

Episode Date: October 27, 2021

We are back with another Bachelorette recap, joined by comedian, actor, and writer, Jim Jefferies! On this recap we dive into addressing the Katie and Blake breakup, how it feels knowing your family is watching the show, and how Michelle’s students will react to seeing her on The Bachelorette. We also talk about how Clayton continues to get outshined, how much control contestants have on date activity selections, and the benefits of dating someone outside of your industry. We also talk about how the location of where contestants live may impact their success and the secret trick to getting onto an Australian Basketball team.  “Maybe he saves a kid from a burning building.” Please make sure to subscribe so you don’t miss an episode and as always send in your relationship questions to [e-mail] to be a part of our Monday episodes.  For merch please visit http://www.viallfiles.com today! THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSORS: BetterHelp: Go to http://www.betterhelp.com/ViallFiles and unload the stress. Theragun: Try Theragun for 30 days starting at only $199. Go to http://www.Therabody.com/VIALL to get your Gen.5 Theragun today.  RumHaven: Discover more recipes that will help you Sip into Paradise at http://www.RumHaven.com SwitchCraft: Download Switchcraft for free and unlock the magical mystery! Episode Socials:  @viallfiles @nickviall @jimjefferies See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This show is sponsored by BetterHelp Online Therapy. Being your best self feels good for your loved ones and for you. Visit betterhelp.com slash V-I-A-L-L-F-I-L-E-S and get back to being you. What's going on everybody welcome back to another episode of vile files bachelorette edition and boy do we have a great episode for you the wonderful hilarious and bachelor superfan jim jeffries how unique thanks for having me is with us today and we are looking forward to break down episode two. We have a great episode for you tomorrow with the guys from Veep. Matt Walsh and Tim Simons

is with us tomorrow from the guys from Veep. They have a great podcast out called Second in Command. More importantly they're just hilarious guys and we have a great conversation and if you've ever found yourself in any type of problematic relationship situation and you've exhausted found yourself any type of problematic relationship situation ship and you you're you've exhausted all your friends check us out on Mondays because

we'll hear you out and solve your dating and relationship problems let's let's get to the bachelorette Jim my audience always likes to know especially when when you have A-list celebrities like yourself, how long... You're a big deal. Yeah, I'm always on the red carpet. There's always movies. People are always like, the paps are always following me. I'm real A-list.

I'm D-list, if anything. I'm on some list. I'm on some watch list. As someone who has a strong fan base how did you find yourself a fan of Bachelor Nation? Me and the wife, we started watching it just

like, I was doing a stand up routine that was basically about like, oh my wife watches The Bachelorette, my wife didn't really watch The Bachelorette right? And so she said to me she goes, oh don't tell people I watch The Bachelorette I don't want people to know I watch The Bachelorette. My wife didn't really watch The Bachelorette. And so she said to me, she goes, oh, don't tell people I watched The Bachelorette. I don't want people to know I watched The Bachelorette. And then one time we were in quarantine or whatever, we started going, oh, well, we'll have a watch ironically. We did that whole thing, these idiots. And we started

watching it. And then we watched another episode. And then we must have seen eight or nine seasons in quarantine. I've watched loads of it. It's been most of my tv in quite i love the bachelor great bachelor i love it well uh we love a season pro and we look forward to uh your your hot takes um before we get into the season or this episode some bachelor news jim i don't know if you are aware but katie and blake announced their their breakup yeah i don't know if you have any uh i'm not a big katie fan katie was probably my least favorite okay am i allowed to say this yeah this is an open platform yeah i don't i never liked katie katie really pissed me off when she got really upset at the bloke who she started calling an actor and all that type of

stuff and she was like i'm in love i've never been more happily in love and then she started ripping into the bloke after the final race. Greg, yeah. And it's like, what do you give a fuck for? You just found love. Move on with your life. What do you care for? I think she was more into that guy than she would have let on.

Otherwise, he wouldn't have hurt her as much as he did. Blake bothered me because Blake, he falls in love at anything he does. You just bring Blake in, he's just like, I'm really in love with this girl. This is the one. This is the thing in, he's just like, I'm really in love with this girl. This is the one. This is the thing. And he's all Canadian and folksy. He went from Claire to Tayshia to Katie and he fell in love with all three of them and it hits him so hard.

Even his family go like this, come on, Blake. You fell in love with the last two, mate. And he's like, no, this one's different. This one's different. He's right about that. Katie's definitely different than Claire and Tisha. Oh, he doesn't have a type, mate. He'll go for anybody.

He doesn't have a type. Available. Yeah, he's available. He'll be on Paradise now, right? He'll come out. Has he done a Paradise? I think he has. He hasn't.

Oh, he hasn't. And I would suspect that if he is interested he would be uh welcomed on the beach it'd be nice i feel like katie would do a paradise it wouldn't surprise me either yeah she's uh what was it sex positive they always say she's sex positive she'd do she'd do it that's what i always say i never heard that term so much in my life i was like all alright if you say so I'll believe you well we wish them both the best

is there details why they broke up is there they released like as if a very profound like the PR person who released the statement didn't even make one custom line it was just the generic statement for a breakup

it's with mutual. They wish each other well moving forward. And they posted the same statement. I think my favorite part, I saw someone, like it was Mike, Mike the Virgin, was like he commented on Blake's post like,

really well written and thoughtful, man. It was like the same statement. It's Katie. Is he still a virgin mike the virgin uh there's been no update so i would suspect why why give up now why is he holding on to it it's just a religious thing right he's just i suspect you know you know sometimes where you're just like people are just like i haven't seen star wars or i haven't seen seen the Titanic and they hold on to it because like it's their thing they get to say.

I feel like maybe there's a little bit of that. Totally. Personality out of it. But I do feel like of the people who are famous virgins on the show he was one of the less

kind of high key religious about it and more just like saving this for someone special. Yeah. Again, I did like his explanation. I think you should

lose your virginity to someone unspecial because you're not doing your best work by the time you get to the special person you want to be better at having sex all right i couldn't agree more i think yeah i think everyone who hasn't been shamed by god and their parents would agree with you but yeah i think that's something you learn after the fact it's like oh well like who wouldn't want to go have sex with the person they lost their virginity to again just to go, look at how much I've improved. Yeah.

Yeah. A progress report. Yeah. Like an update. Yeah. Totally. So my real last name is Nugent and Jeffrey's the middle name

and all that type of stuff. So stage reasons and all that type of stuff. I was telling the story about how I lost my virginity on stage and the girl I lost my virginity to was in the audience and didn't know she was watching me. So that's like, would have spat her out. Wow.

Wait, she didn't remember you? She remembered me from my original name before I got into show business. It happened when we were 15. Okay. Basically a band camp type of a situation. It was a drama school, right? And so it happened then she lost her virginity

as well and then she's watching and I'm telling a story about it and she's like fucking hell that's the bloke I lost my virginity to

but she didn't know that when she bought the ticket oh no way yeah did you guys end up talking and connect well I already had a kid oh we end up talking

yeah we're pleasant to each other yeah yeah yeah but we didn't you know we didn't hook up again or anything like that yeah she was brought there by some boyfriend who was more excited about the

show than she was she's like you had sex with jim jeffries it's awesome i probably got weird next time you know all right let's get in this episode a couple quick things i i was wrong a little bit uh last week i mean it's episode one but i a couple things i definitely got wrong first off ryan i i tried to empathize with maybe alternative situations maybe he didn't really know the show turns out he's just a bold-faced liar the guy last the guy who had all the notes yeah yeah yeah that was insane yeah and we spent some time you know obviously this show um we we try to look at all the angles because it can be edited and people overreact and i thought hey well maybe here's a guy who if he didn't watch the show all that much it might make sense that his buddy's wife who's been watching like 15 seasons, like gave him some notes. But this guy on his Instagram,

I just think he's not particularly bright, went to, before the pandemic, Bachelor was doing like a roadshow where Ben Higgins was like the host. And I think Becca Kufrin was his co-host. And they did like a Bachelor live event. And so they'd have a bachelor from the local area and he would like date women from the audience or something.

I don't know. And this Ryan guy was there. I think he was, was he the bachelor? So this motherfucker has been taking notes for a long, so he's just a bold face. Yeah, but also just remember him. You don't need to bring him. Commit that to memory.

Yeah, just go, okay. And there was some notes in there that were things like and try not to be yourself because you're unpleasant like it was like really like and try to hold down your temper because you've got a bit of i love how the camera crew at the end they just did that picture of like he was sitting on an apple box like he wasn't even on a bit of furniture from the resort they just given him like what the cameraman was sitting on to sit while he had to wait and he was just like i don't understand it's like my emotions were real yeah i mean i i couldn't agree more but he's uh he's definitely a liar and i actually after that because i was i was shocked that he had notes about, you're right, he was like, you're an unpleasant, unlikable guy. And I was like, that's…

Do you think that was him talking to himself? I thought that was the friend, right? We assumed. I think it was the friend. It's one thing to have notes on her and notes on things that will get you a rose. You know, like if you have a sob story, don't let it out too early. Wait till you're on the brink of being kicked off

and then throw out your sob story, right? But like he just, yeah, as you said, it was just like, you're very unpleasant. Remember to use deodorant. You often smell. I was just kind of shocked by that. But anyway, it turns out he's just a liar. Yeah, so he could have disguised them so much better. Like you put those in like nice cards. No one's of shocked by that. But anyway, it turns out he's just a liar.

Yeah, so he could have disguised them so much better. Like, you put those in, like, nice cards. No one's going to open that. Like, you put them in, like, there's so many ways to get away with that. Well, here's a question. Do they go through your bags? How did they find them? No, they don't.

And what they do early on, and we mentioned this last week, is the first four days before they start, they're in their hotel room. There's, like, a lot of pre-production stuff, photographs, photographs interviews and producers are in and out just kind of getting to know the cast and i think he just left it out i mean keep in mind he knew this episode i assumed he knew this would be talked about and the picture of him as the bachelor on bachelor live was still his instagram so i i just don't think he's... He's not trying to hide anything. Isn't that kind of weird? It's like you would think he'd be like, I probably should delete this before the episode comes out

because I sit there and tell America that I don't know anything about the show and yet I was the Bachelor on their roadshow. Well, we got to assume now that people who go on the show do know something about the show. The idea of people like, oh, it was just suggested by a friend. When I spoke to you you said that that was basically what happened to you you had friends who but i feel like case who was the little guy that looked like a troll last year hunter yeah yes yeah right right so so hunter he was a real

he was a real all right if you get through week five this is what you do if you get through that top four top four top four i know what the top four is yeah that guy yeah he i mean he i think he was a fan and like myself and i think a lot of guys especially the men who might not have been fans they do their homework like i i bought a couple seasons watched it for the first time you know i talked to some of my you know guy friends girlfriends who had watched the show and i was like what what what should i do so like yeah it would make sense um but he he just got caught in a lie did you have did you have any tactics or did you just go and be myself did you have one thing not to sound corny but i really did i was trying not to be the villain i did that poorly in a sense because i ended up being the villain the first

season but i did the whole like i'm just gonna be. And once I got in that bubble, I liked her. And that was kind of death's door for me in a sense because once I liked her, I was like, I got to make this real. So I became really earnest and really serious. But once I showed up, I was just like, you know, people at work would be like, you're, every, I was just, I mean, you know, people at work be like, you, you're not going to go there for love. Right. And I was like, no, of course not. Like I was going for the experience of like, I didn't think I was going

to like show up and fall in love, but I was, once I went and like got there, I was like, all right, well, I should be open to seeing what happens. And I think that's what the majority of the people who go, that's probably their honest take on things. I'd like to be a contestant. And my wife's up for me doing it as well. But obviously, that'll hamper it. Me having a baby and all that type of stuff, right? I can't be on it.

Could they just be like… You got to spin it. You got to make it a plot point, you know? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Is Jim there for the right reasons? He's got a yeah. Yeah. Is Jim there for the right reasons? He's got a wife and kid. Is he there for the right reasons?

My wife likes the show. Hi, honey. My wife likes the show. Yeah, every interview. I'm on TV. You're just a comedian trying to get a bigger Instagram following. Well, we were talking off air about like Jamie. And I always believe that everyone has a sob story.

And so the sob story is going gonna go from we grew up really poor and sometimes my mother had to work two jobs and my dad left and there's always that level of uh all right fine and then there's the weakest one of them all is i got broken up with my god i got dumped yeah or you're a 27 year old whose grandparent just died that's what they're fucking meant to do. They're grandparents. You're 27. That's a reasonable thing to have happen in your life. I was really close with Pop Pop. Yeah, yeah.

It's still sad. I'm not belittled, but it's not like, but then like. It's called life. Jamie dropped his sob story on his first solo date, and he had a doozy. You did. You can't be that. I was like, he started off like, and I was doing really good at school, and they moved me up a grade, and my dad't be that. I was like, he started off like that.

And I was doing really good at school. And they moved me up a grade. And my dad was never around. I was like, here we go. My dad wasn't around. And then boom, his mom killed herself. Fucking hell, that's roses all day. That was, I felt sorry for him.

I really did. I honestly, at the time, well, let's backtrack a little bit. Sorry, did I jump ahead on your podcast? We jump around all the time let's backtrack a little bit sorry did I jump ahead on your podcast we jump around all the time but when Jamie got the rose you know you got I call him Skippy

Chris Ass will forever be Skippy on this show he just looks like one of those like hey guys wanna hang out yeah yeah yeah he's always hey get your body rubbed whenever you want Like, want to hang out? Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's always got a bit of that. Theragun. Hey, get your body rubbed whenever you want, as long as you want.

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especially men on the show, to just, as Skippy said, he's not grateful or happy to be here. Yeah, yeah. So it's like, what the fuck is that? Good for Jamie for, he might have gone about the right way and definitely didn't sound very attractive when he said it, but he is implying that he's looking for his equal like i want her to like me which is a normal thing he sort of implied that he goes well maybe i

won't like her yeah which is uh early on guys are like what the bro like she's a god um i wasn't that big a michelle fan when she was on the other season. Really? And now I am. Now that she's a bachelorette, I've turned. I thought she was nice and pretty and all that type of stuff, but I didn't think she had much going on. And now I'm a sucker for a school teacher. As soon as they started that, the kid's like, okay, how many guys do you think I'm dating?

And also she's teaching fifth grade. So all the kids are going to come back. So the fantasy suites miss you know what i mean like that's always got to be harder with that occupation like it's hard it's hard when your parents have to watch the show right you must have had some things with your parents so then when you've got like so fifth grade is what are they 10 that's a it's a hard thing to explain that's a good point in terms of like worrying about what people think of you on that show being a teacher has got to be one of the hardest.

Yeah. Now, the thing is, those kids shouldn't be watching the show. They're too young. So it's really up to the parents. But your peers. The parent-teacher conferences, you know. The principal, you know, it could get weird. But right off the bat, when Jamie was saying like accepting his day card, I could tell

it was going to go a little awry for him, if that's the right word. Nate rolled his eyes and more importantly, Clayton rolled his eyes, which I don't know if you know this, but they've already announced the new Bachelor. It's not? Yes, they have.

Well, the story's broken. It's Clayton? They haven't announced it? Yeah, I know. Oh, ABC hasn't? Anyways, it's the world's worst kept secret then. Clayton is your next bachelor. So Clayton obviously doesn't win. He doesn't win. Me and the wife, we bet on him like the horses. And Clayton was one of my picks.

So he obviously doesn't win. He does not win. Sorry about that. He makes it far though. Far enough. Well, he looks like a Clayton. He does. He could be Clayton Kershaw's little brother i'm

in a family of clayton's yeah he could actually quite he kind of kind of kind of looks like him but it's interesting this season now that we know he's the bachelor you know most of the time when they are airing they they'll film the season and then when they go in the editing room they certainly have like who are their like guys they like or women they like, who do they think has what it takes to be the next bachelor, but they don't know how the audience is going to react. So the edit will kind of take certain things. And because, you know, they decided to go to Kate Clayton for, you know, maybe because Joe got engaged or Michael A couldn't do it, or, you know, guys from the season season they picked Clayton and now

you know that Clayton is going to give they're going to do whatever they can to make him look as great as possible oh okay so the bachelor edit right he is like and so which couple things I want to point out how unimpressive and boring is Clayton so far two episodes in unbelievably well unbelievably I only picked him as one of my bets because they did, after the first episode, they did the,

this year on The Bachelor. And then Clayton was in a lot of scenes. Well, that's because he's your next bachelor. Clayton sticks around, so I put my money on Clayton. Here's me talking about like, oh, you shouldn't let a 10 or 11 year old watch it,

but my eight year old son has three picks as well. He gets to pick things as well we'll go through your picks at the end of uh the episode we only do three each because there's people you don't even worry about but i think i lost one of mine already but my my wife was straight in on joe like before anything and i think joe's a front runner. Oh, yeah. Big time. She's got Joe and Jamie. She's killing it, my wife. Oh, yeah.

Well, I mean, also, like, it was pretty clear early on that she liked both those guys. I've got Clayton, Romeo, and not Rodney. Rodney's not got a chance in hell. Does anyone have Nate? Yeah, because Nate. Romeo and Rickick i've got clayton romeo and rick rick i think rick's got crazy eyes i don't like david copperfield you

have no chance of winning i don't i mean maybe i just don't see those i like this is a good looking guy i kept i was like i'm trying to find my like you you know, underdogs, you know, guys we haven't like, you know, clearly Nate and Joe for sure. Now, obviously Jamie, we'll see, but Romeo,

like, well, I don't know. What about, what's wrong with Romeo? Oh, I like him. I was early in the episode when he was,

I loved his answer, like 36,000. And all these guys are just, you know, are just you know infinity you know it's like all thinking they're really clever

and he's like I try to figure out how many seconds are in a day amazing although how annoying would that be being told you're pretty

every second of the day that would yeah after like 8 seconds they'd be like you know what I get it thank you

please stop Blake's like I gotta write this down man it's a great line but it was Thank you. Please stop. Blake's like, I got to write this down, man. It's a great line. But it was smooth. Also, he's just like, I studied mathematics at Harvard. What a flex. I think I spoke to you about on my podcast.

Chris G., I have a real issue with bachelors and bachelorettes that are motivational speakers. Yes, we do too. What the fuck is that? The only way you can be a motivational speaker is if you've had to achieve something. And the minimum is Everest. You've got to have climbed Everest

or you've had to get over a severe cancer. That's your minimum. You have to have done something inspiring. You can't just... You have to be at least over 35 at a minimum? Yeah. Like some life lessons? But all social media is fucking motivational speaking.

You just scroll through your Instagram. It's like a day without thing is not a real day and treat people well and whatever the fuck they say. But we're being bombarded with these little messages that we're seeing. And then this kind of thing. Sorry, I use that word. I'm Australian.

I'm sorry. Gestures to the women. I wasn't talking about either of you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I use it on men as well. You see, that's the weird thing about like being Australian or British. We use the C word on men. And so it's a little bit of an adjustment.

But anyway, this fella, right? This fella. What's he motivating? How's he motivating anybody? I mean, kids, I guess. So a little bit better than Carl. Yeah, Carl was a bad motivational speaker. He had a webpage where he was like charging $10,000 for business advice.

I don't think anyone. I don't think he sold one package, but it was available for purchase. And what would be the business advice? I don't know. If you get a product, you got to make your overheads low and your product reasonably priced. You got to sell it at that rate. That's probably what he would say. Yeah, a bit of very like 101 he would be like i don't know like supply

demand you know roi is important you know like know who your customer is sell the value and how do you find those customers that's the key yeah i think they find you yeah you go on the bachelor yeah yeah but i and in defense to chris Chris, I think his kids are his target. So assembly. What I'm hearing is he speaks at assemblies. Yeah, but he's a motivational speaker from Nova Scotia. Maybe it's like hot LA. I've been there.

All the motivation would be like, you have to move out of Nova Scotia. This is my motivation for you. Try to go to a big city. There's more opportunities. Yeah. To all my fans in Nova scotia i'll see you soon hell you mobile video games out there i got an absolutely banger of a new mobile game for you that's right switchcraft it's super fun super entertaining and um you're gonna love it it's

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you're gonna love Switchcraft. Join what many people are calling the greatest mobile game of all time. It's so fun. It's so entertaining. You and your friends will love it. Download Switchcraft for free and unlock the magical mystery now. I did think his poem was charming and I don't think he's going to go far. I was wrong about him.

Also, I was really wrong about Peter. he's going to go far. I was wrong about him. Also, I was really wrong about Peter. I thought Peter would be like, again, someone who like maybe looks like a clear villain but might surprise you.

No. You liked his suit too on night one. No, I didn't like his suit. Yes, you did. I just liked that he owned it. Play back the clip. I liked that he,

I thought he was going to be like surprisingly charming and it turns out he's unsurprisingly petty. Pete has done that thing where it's like, she's like, I heard yelling over there out he's surprised like unsurprisingly peter's done that thing where it's like she's like i heard yelling over there and he's like ah that is so out of character for me and then it's like every scene's him throwing a jacket in the pool like so you know he's staying and they're just like he's just a shitster and he's like yelling that's not me he's just got a

temper on him old peter or he's being edited badly no that's that's clear also because and peter goes when when will which bummed what will went home i really wanted him to stay but when willow calls him an artist this is peter goes yeah i don't care what he has to say about like his some version of i don't care what he thinks about me only to call him over fight with him yeah care very much. Like, what a flex it would have been to, like, actually not care. And what's a pizza pensioner? Is that just you have a pizza place? Or is he going to revolutionize pizza?

I don't know. But what I do know, he doesn't know how to follow, like, simple, like, directions of ingredients, which I thought was a concern because pizza, in a way, was like you have to do things in order. Yeah, it's systematic. Every other person was like, oh, yeah, no problem.

Okay, put the salt in, put the juice in, and boom. And he's just like, I got nothing. Do you think she's attracted to Peter? No. No, you don't think there's any chemistry? Because remember that Hannah B season where there was that blonde blonde guy what's his name that no one luke luke yeah luke p right yeah and everyone was like what the fuck is going on why does she but she was hot

for him she had something in her belly about him i was worried that maybe peter might stay a bit peter yeah i don't know i feel like she likes him a little bit. No, it's funny that you bring him up because Jamie is potentially Luke P. And what I mean by that is, let's just talk about Jamie a little bit. She clearly likes him. He got out

of a limo. One of the few people that Michelle was like, I like this guy. And then on night one, she said to Jamie, there's no awkward moments with you. So she's really validated them. And that's significant out of a night one, 30 guys, you remember two or three people and Jamie's one of the guys that she remembers. They go on this date. I thought it was significant that Michelle was like, you know, and it tracks, right? Michelle's clearly like, she's a teacher. She's very confident.

She's been successful her whole life. Well-spoken. She handles conflict well. But when she says, I'm usually the one who's the coach in the relationship, I thought that was like really relatable for someone who's like, because she has all all these qualities she's probably used to dating men where she kind of probably feels like she's been babysitting or like constantly critiquing them and she's looking for her equal so when jamie is on the state and he's good at this rock climbing thing and and offering her like she she's like oh i'm i'm leaning on him I like that quality in him. Yeah. And all these things. So she likes him. And the Bachelorette is always the most interesting when the lead really likes a guy that everyone else hates.

That all the men don't like, yeah. And that gets really compelling. And the big question is, will Jamie burn out based on what happened? Or Michelle, after empathizing with this story like i'm i think he's going to stick around for a while i think it's going to take a while before they realize that he was lying and what he was lying about was the whole oh everyone in the house is talking about it we're all talking it was just him and one bloke and he brought it up yeah you know what i mean

he's like oh yeah he goes everyone so he goes i got a boy who lives in Minnesota, a friend of mine, and he saw you in a bar. And he's like, oh, you already paired up with some guy who was a light-skinned baller. And everyone's talking about it. And it's like, you're the only bloke who's talking about it. I wonder if other people were talking about it. Because one of the guys in that foursome was the one who said,

I think it was Martin. He's like, so what's up with Joe and Michelle? So I don't think Jamie lied about that other people are talking about. I think he wildly exaggerated. Yeah. He went from two people talking about it to like, everyone thinks this about you.

And you're like, who's everyone? And like one other person, you know. But I don't understand what's the problem. Let's say she was dating before The Bachelorette. Who gives a shit? Of course. It's like you're going to be dating. You're going to have to date.

You don't go in there with a boyfriend or a husband, but you're allowed to go on dates. Well, if you've ever watched the show, the show like they will make villains out of nothing and you're not supposed to have an advantage and everyone's supposed to be in it for the right reasons and if you're the lead or any of the guys who like talked to a you know if you're a heterosexual person who talked to the opposite sex weeks before filming i think we talked about this on your podcast they'll be like so and so was dating someone and then they broke up and you're just like were you dating someone before coming on the show yeah but they act they

and in the past people have been crucified for that very thing also it sounds like joe slipped into a dm's years ago and then ghosted her yeah and then uh thought which seems like a weird thing to think you're out of it but also also, look, I've been on apps and stuff like that. Sometimes it's just that you find someone else and you lose interest or your life's busy or you're whatever. You forget. You forget. You're like…

Because at that stage, when you're talking to someone in the DMs, you're probably talking to 10 people until you find one that you want to focus on. And those other nine people sort of go by the side, you know? And last week, we guessed like how extensive that conversation was and michelle added context he said there was two messages back and forth so like that shit happens all the time right like someone's trying to play hard to get and taking a little while to respond the other person's like i've lost interest yeah it's like i don't know

like whatever jamie handled the situation really, really, really poorly. And it's certainly a bad luck when all the other guys... He shouldn't have said anything. He shouldn't have said anything. He had a rose on his lapel. He was riding high. He was doing fine. Why didn't he bring this up to Michelle on their date? Is one question that I have.

Like, that would have been a great time. Like, hey, we're having a great time. But, like, here's this, like, really weird thing. And I just want to, like, be up front with you i heard this thing whatever that would have been fine had he heard that and question it but yes he was gossiping with other uh guys in the house i don't care but i do care he said i don't care and how he cared minutes apart yeah yeah in the same group but do we have do we offer like for a guy who whose mom uh died by suicide who clearly had a tough childhood i probably doesn't trust a lot of people in his circle he handled this poorly but like i just i don't fault him after michelle like called out the group for him just like

not saying anything i don't fault him for owning it up to those guys because he doesn't know those guys or trust those guys yeah he's probably waiting to talk to michelle and i wonder i think in his mind he's telling like the truth like he thought because one person talked to him he's like oh they're all chatting about it where it's really just a closed conversation. I think it's a situation that he exaggerated. He got caught up in this bubble, was not expecting Michelle to address the group. And he thought this was going on. But also, isn't it fair to criticize those other four men for not saying anything when michelle was

like hey everyone knows this i feel like there should be some dialogue here and no one said anything i thought a for all the guys who like joe and and nate what a missed opportunity to step up a bit like hey like michelle like i just want to say I don't know what they're talking about, but I've never questioned you. We're good. So I just want to get that out of there. And no one stepped up in that situation. I think it was a missed opportunity.

And Martin heard Jamie's story. He told Martin that I saw Michelle do X, do x y and z and having been in that world what i'm confident in that like there's a lot most of the room has no idea what michelle's talking about but there is a handful of guys who are in that group and some of the guys were talking about it and the reason why they're not saying anything and they're not going up to Jamie is Jamie knows Michelle's talking about him. Right. But there's probably five or six guys who are wondering if Jamie's talking about them. And they don't know.

And they think they might be guilty. And they're not saying anything and playing dumb because they're worried that they were gossiping about this joe and and they don't know the edit and they don't know and they don't know so they're they're also not saying anything so like wow i know like jamie handled the shitty and he's definitely the one who got it wrong there's some of these other guys aren't as innocent like why isn't martin like addressing jamie head on be like hey you clearly were the one who told Michelle this. Like, what's up? But he may have spoken to some other people on Martin.

Jamie is not the only one who was talking about Joe and Michelle's connection. In that world, once a rumor gets out, it spreads like a virus. And they constantly talk about it it is i bet half the half the house yeah but what's the rumor that she was out in a nightclub with a bloke like it's a pretty weak ass room or was the rumor that she's been dating joe i mean who knows right yeah just it just has to start with some stupid thing but i always think these okay so okay, so I heard that Katie was dating the Canadian bloke before the show.

And I've heard different rumors and stuff like that. And I always wonder like, okay, so let's say Michelle was dating Joe. Why the fuck bother going on the show then? Just go, all right, I'll see you afterwards if you're already dating him. It just seems like a weird. Well, that's what we do. Like if, let's say Michelle and Joe were dating, right? And it's this whole setup. That's what we do like if let's say Michelle and Joe were dating right and it's this

whole setup that's what people would say like kind of like paradise they would say the Brendan and Piper why didn't you just not come so there's a little bit of like accusations towards Michelle like in that vein of well if you knew the guy why are you two

here but like she didn't know the guy. I also loved how... Or so you could meet someone better. No one ever thinks of that. You might go on and go, I was going for that fella, but I met this fella. Totally.

Malik and Spencer, though, I really like they're in that group and they're just like, I don't know, they didn't hear the rumor and they were just like, I don't really care. Well, and Spencer even said he was like,

even if that's true, I'm not going to take away from my time with her by talking about this. He was like, it's not worth it to me. I like Spencer. Yeah. I like him. Yeah. Potentially an underdog. Which one's Spencer? Give me a look here. Yeah. He was part of that. He's the one with the son, right?

He has a three-year-old son. Yeah, I thought that was him because he was like, I have a three-year-old and then she asked if he had a photo when they were on the group date yeah i also think rodney might be a sneaky underdog how do you have a photo if you don't have your phone with you is he just carrying a photo around in his wallet it was in his wallet yeah in a wallet or they might be like hey here's here's your phone it's like an eight by ten headshot he's like here's here's my child. He would probably send the pictures of his son to a producer and the producer would hand him his phone on airplane mode or some shit like that so they could show Michelle. And what does Spencer do for a living?

I can't find him on the sheet. I don't know who Spencer is. Financial crimes analyst. Is that the very best? Financial crimes analyst. So are we like one of these people who like found out that Wells Fargo was up to no good

or something like that yeah he's like he's catching white is it like white collar crime then he's going after I don't know interesting man I hope so

that's a real thing I unfortunately was right about PJ PJ the firefighter smoke show absolute smoke show absolute literal smoke show no truly smoke show are you like PJ PJ. PJ, the firefighter. Smoke show. Absolute smoke show. Absolute, literal smoke show.

No, truly, smoke show. Are you like PJ? I thought PJ was very charming. He was just hot. Yeah, he's hot. I'll tell you, he got no airplay. Par deep. The one thing they showed was him.

He was the one who took that shot on the basketball date. That was like nowhere near the hoop. Michelle's like, nope. Yes. Michelle likes an athlete. I mean, she also, she's a smarty pants. She certainly wants her like

cerebral eagle. Like Troy Bolton. Yeah. But she doesn't, I don't think Michelle needs a Romeo, but she, you know, she wants someone who can hoop a little bit.

Like, you know, maybe Nate, like he missed a layup or whatever, but like she sees Nate's potential and maybe she doesn't criticize Nate for his lack of basketball schools because she's like you're Canadian you guys don't play basketball but like Nate's not Canadian and they do play basketball but I

I always I get all of Canada being like we play basketball Toronto Raptors run the championship it's just not as big as hockey I'd be on that date where they're going, no, we'll just picnic down here. I don't have to climb up the mountain. That seems like a lot.

Like, do you ever look at dates like that where you're just like, what are they going to make us do? It seems like physical exertion. Like, one-on-one dates normally are like you eat sushi off each other. And then, like, sometimes the group dates are like you're going to punch each other in the face, right the face right but like that one was like climbing up a mountain does he get any say in that the group dates this one-on-one date where he's like going oh no no no he just walks up and he has to do it yeah they're they're the group dates are all like all the dates

are pre-planned by produce i mean because you have to like these are they have to organize this stuff and you know there's i mean you're gonna climb mountains so you have to, like these are, they have to organize this stuff and, you know, there's, I mean, you're going to climb mountains so you have to have, there's legal involved in that and. But are you allowed to rock up

and like at the moment I've got a sore rotator cuff. Am I allowed to go, I can't right now because there's a bit much to get up there. Well, again,

when they're prepping for the show and they're in the hotel room for four days sitting around, those are like, those are like conversations you're having. So like, the fact, it't shocking that jamie knew how to rock climb you know what i'm

saying right right right right right right you know so like what are the favorite activities you like to do and jamie's like i don't know i've climbed some rocks you know also they they love a really good sad story to kick off the one-on-one dates so they had him straight in there because the biker comes in next with his sad story about that and i never found my bike again that guy's got nothing on suicide mom i don't know if you can top that in terms of emotional vulnerability no no that one that one that one i i was like oh give him. Yeah, totally. I got teared up for sure. I mean, like, you know, a little verklempt in the throat. Also, Michelle, like, I really gave her a lot of props

because that's an awkward moment to be a part of. Like, I don't know what I would have said. Well, and she didn't… And he even complimented her on that because he's like, so many people just say, I'm so sorry. And she didn't say, I'm sorry. And she was just like…

I'm proud of you. The group date, the basketball group date, I mean, that was like a one-on-one with Michelle and Joe. Imagine being the other guys just watching those two.

I've never seen two people flirt so hard. It was like playing basketball while having sex. It was like foreplay. Yeah. Michelle was like, oh, it was a good pass, Joe.

Yeah. I was getting turned on. It was the two of them on the court alone. She was like, you. Yeah. Michelle was like… It was like hot and heavy. It was a good pass, Joe. Yeah. I was getting turned on. It was the two of them on the court alone. She was like, you're going to let me shoot from out here? You're going to let me shoot? And he's like, yeah. Yeah.

And the rest of them are just standing on the sidelines saying absolutely nothing. If I'm on the sidelines, I'm like, fuck. These two make so much sense. I'm out. Like, they looked great together.

Yeah, but that's just because they both go to basketball. Sure. But there's a… There's a chemistry there. They looked great together. Yeah, but that's just because they're both good at basketball. Sure, but there's a chemistry there. What NBA players have had children with WNBA players? Not many. Fine, but I'm just saying. If this is your guy, they can both play basketball. It's not that they can play basketball,

that they're clearly into each other and they also can play basketball oh i've dated female comedians not fun not fun i've done it a couple of times i won't do it anymore there's too much fucking shop talk i think i think that you don't want that that is a good point in the sense that but she doesn't play basketball anymore right she just sort of played it in college yeah i think she likes basketball she used to play you're right that i think a lot of people don't want to like date someone they work with it's just it's too much shop talk have you ever dated someone who's just like you terrible you're terrible i got enough self-hate i don't want to be around that person you know what i mean

terrible i dated someone who was exactly like me the exact same person it was the worst really but i don't think joe and michelle are same. I think they both like basketball. I think Joe is kind of an introverted person. I don't think Michelle is more extroverted. What does Joe do now that he's not a professional basketball player? He seems to be like in real estate. Everyone says they're in real estate when jobs

don't work out. They showed him remodeling properties. Yeah, he's in development in real estate. I think he just flips houses. Okay. He's just a house flipper. So? No, I'm just saying like

real estate developer. There's nothing wrong with house flipping. People make like… Oh, I know. You can be a millionaire if you're good at it. But it's nobody's

first choice of career. Like it's never like nobody… Who are you talking about? Oh, no. There's a bloke in my street who puts something in my mailbox all the time and he's off fucking

Milroy's place. I remember him. What do you mean? There's a ton of people whose house flipping is their first choice. You think they go to college or like, or just whatever, like… I'm not saying it's something that

when you're nine, you're like, what do you want to be when you grow up? But they're like, house flipper. But I think you grow up, you're like, learn about real estate. I'm not saying it's a bad option. I'm just saying I don't think it's an option many people hone in on early.

I think it's one that gets presented in the wake of less. Yeah, and you've… But I would also argue you have to have a certain level of capital gets presented in the wake of less. But I would also argue you have to have a certain level of capital to invest in the houses to start with. So clearly he's been successful. How do you buy the house to flip it? You get a mortgage

and then you flip it. You could be savvy. He could have had one job making a modest living and had a goal in mind and saved up and got a bank loan and focused on his credit and like, you know, shaving. You start off with like a small house like a doll's house and you flip that you move up to a dog house your dog house tree house and you get off the house house i just i don't know the original one you actually just flip

with a spatula defending house flippers but like it's not a bottom of the barrel job i wasn't saying it was bottom of the barrel i am it's the bottom of the barrel job if you're at home and you're flipping houses wake up to yourself the property brothers have made quite a living off of it i just i again not a bottle bottom of the barrel job just one that i don't think people tend to seek out originally i think it's when they find yes i don't think you know nowadays when they're like i want to be a youtube star astronaut and professional athlete i don't think number five is house flipper but like either is accountant you know or salesman i've met the property brothers they're nice they're nice guys i i was doing a gig in vegas and i had like the people come up and go um one of the property uh brothers want to speak to and i never heard of the fucking property brothers and i thought it

was someone who owned the casino and i'm like all right if they want to come and speak to me i don't know what i've just performed in the theater. I don't have much to say. Like a lovely property. Thanks for having me. It was one of the property brothers. They're charming guys. Yeah, charming guys. What do we think about Brendan? Can't spell, got the group date rose. Right.

Allie stuck her tongue out, rolled her eyes and vomited. So you hate him. He like acts like a child. He's like his little smooth. He's like, she's like, oh, you're staring into my eyes. He's like, I just want to go home

and have a dream about you. I was like, I mean, yes, what he said was corny for sure. And Michelle appropriately called him out. Brandon's one of my picks as well. And he handled it well.

I don't know. Like, of course it was cheesy, but like, I just feel like she's a woman and he's a boy. Yeah, she does look, he does look like a child next to her. It's like, it's not going to work out.

Oh, I don't think Brennan's going to win. He seems like a nice lad and he's a traveling nurse. Yeah, he's the one with Noah energy. Yeah, he was the one we identified night one as having some swag to him. And then also, I think Michelle is clearly charmed by it. Even if she's a more mature than that i think it makes her a little giggly and happy that's perfect noah energy yeah you could have a little weekend away with him you're not gonna marry the fella yeah same as uh who's that blonde guy that used to have the long hair that everyone liked he's got a bit of that john paul jones john paul jones john paul jones

noah and this fella why no go far farther than michelle like michelle yeah she's i don't think she's like i see him it's because he's a talker he can talk and in that world like breaking uncomfortable silence and like just talking is is the greatest currency you can have in that world because Michelle's going, that's why PJ went home, right? PJ, like Nate connection, Joe connection, Jamie connection.

And by the time she gets to PJ, she's like, you're hot. But PJ is probably just like, Hey, what's up? You know, Hey,

let's play some bags. And he doesn't talk much, which is fine. Like he just, and so she's like, I don't know. I don't have a connection. And you just want someone when it's your 15th conversation on the night to like be the one who carries the conversation has there been a comedian on the show that must have been someone

who tried to further because there's been so many people who were like i'm a singer songwriter and then they they get together and they sing a song they do a bit of that but has there ever been a comedian just trying to beat someone's heart has a rough date and then is like I gotta do type 5

in front of all the guys that's a good question of all the random ass jobs that we see I don't ever remember like comedian being on the

there's tons of them yeah I feel like I feel like if you're gonna go on as a comedian like the way to go is to do a character like Sacha Baron Cohen style, but you got to do it well executed,

so that way you make it far enough to have a high impact. Well, it's kind of like actor. I think we've seen that before, but if you're serious about that craft, you don't go on The Bachelor. Like, I'm sure, you know, Katie apparently is giving comedy a try. Oh, she's doing stand-up, is she?

Yeah, I guess so. Oh, my God. I'll have to see around the traps. You could say hi. I'll say hi. I'm not a big Katie fan. Grumpy person. But yeah, she might be good at stand-up.

I wish Katie a lot of luck with her stand-up. I think I'm going to get in trouble for saying that. You should book her, you know? You need an opening act for your next tour. I can get her to open up for me. That's good. On a sex positive show. Opening up, doing a show with Whitney Cummings. She's opening up for Whitney. I think she was on Whitney's podcast

and they struck up a rapport. I saw her tweet something, Katie, about maybe it's like an opportunity that Whitney's providing her. Whitney's very good. Whitney's a friend of mine. I'll ring Whitney up and I'll tell you what the scuttlebutt is on that. All right. Jamie.

What do we think is going to happen with Jamie? Jamie. Does he go home next week? Or do you think he sticks around for a while? He'll have like a tumultuous couple of weeks. He'll go back and forth. Because we need like the tension to build like the Luke Parker situation. Yeah, he's got to be like the last rose

of the next rose ceremony. And then maybe he goes home after that. I think Peter goes home first and then we'll have Jamie remaining. And Peter's just kind of like, whatever. Peter's there for drama. Skippy's there for drama. But like Michelle really likes Jamie.

So the question is, I just don't think you're going to, because Jamie, because Michelle likes Jamie so the question is I just don't think you're gonna because Jamie because Michelle likes Jamie this is not like a producer's like let's keep him around so to speak because like you don't care about him and like he's he talks but like if if Jamie the question is will Jamie be able to say the right things to Michelle in private that whether good enough for us will justify what he said to Michelle and will they be able to like stretch that out before Michelle finally is like you know what I tried to give you a chance you've continued to prove to me that maybe you're not you know who i thought you were but ultimately like there are things to like about jamie it's just that he clearly has his insecurities he's got some jamie's gonna be

that guy that when it gets down to the last sort of six people he's gonna be angry that she's dating other people there's always one fella it's like yeah like uh me and you had such a thoughtful conversation then you're off with this guy and you're like that's the, yeah, like, me and you had such a thoughtful conversation. Then you're off with this guy and you're like, that's the fucking show, man. Calm down. There's always one who does it. Jamie's going to be that guy. He gets, yeah, he has a jealousy kind of aspect to him.

I would say that's... Or like the exceptionalism element. I think that's really what it is. It's like the, wait, but I'm so special. How are you not seeing how special I am and how special this is? Well, having to tell Michelle that like he, you know, he's making conversation, but like people thought I was going to skip a grade and like whatever. But also maybe it came from a place of…

Did they think he was going to skip a grade or did he skip a grade? I don't know. They thought he was. And so like you don't get to bring it up if you didn't actually skip the grade. Has that ever really happened? Like I've seen Doogie Howser, right? Has that ever really happened?

There's always TV shows where there's like an 11-year-old in college and they're Like, I've seen Doogie Howser, right? Does that ever really happen, this whole... There's always TV shows where there's, like, an 11-year-old in college, and they're doing... I don't know. Also, like, who cares? I skipped second grade. Yeah. Okay.

Maybe you shouldn't have. You're saving a lot of time there. It's like, wouldn't you rather just be with your mates at school and just be, like, the smartest kid in class? Like, that would seem easier to me. I also wonder, like like if you're so smart like a prodigy that you should be in college i'm fine at like the fifth grade level but like what's with with society becoming more aware about like emotional maturity and social interactions does

it ever make sense just because like you're good at long division faster than your peers to like skip a grade because you could easily easily not be good at making friends or socially developed, maybe because you're so into math and commas. I don't know. I would... You don't need to be smart anymore. Everyone's got all the information in the world

on their phone, in their pocket. You don't even need to learn stuff anymore. All the motivational speakers. Yeah, that's it. Motivational speakers. Just learn about all the dating terms and gaslighting and narcissists. How would you handle if someone called you a narcissist in their environment? Oh, I've had that several times in my life.

And they just don't understand that I'm better than them. How do… On a TV show, if someone said I was a narcissist? In that environment, yeah. I think you have to laugh it off. I think the worst thing he could have done is just go, really fucking narcissist? I think he should have made a joke back just like I said there.

Just something like, you know, he should have spelt narcissist as Peter as well or something like that. Yeah. He definitely maybe did the worst thing you could have done. Of course you're going to be a narcissist when you look this good. You say something like that and you. He definitely did the worst thing you could have done. Of course, you're going to be a narcissist when you look this good. You say something like that

and you just try to let it pass. But like just going, really? He thinks that I think that I'm the most important person in the world? Because that's not what I do. I don't even care.

He just doesn't do that. And then start yelling. Bro, I take that very seriously. Yeah, yeah. And then like when Michelle comes over and then he had to do the whole,

that's very out of character for me because I'm normally a lot better with my emotions. And it's like, very clearly, you're the guy that they're going to edit badly. So you should probably calm down a little bit. Well, and the best was, they were showing like the clips of them yelling and then they were going back to Michelle

and they were going back and forth. But there was a clip where you didn't even see them yelling, but you could overhear it slightly. And Will just yells at Peter out of nowhere. What else do you have to offer besides the slice, bro? And I was like, what is happening? I'm sad that Will's gone.

I thought Will was pretty funny. Did we like Rick's little homework assignment? I thought that was charming and cute. I really just… I thought the assignment was cute. He did…

It was like cheesy but not over the top. I just need to figure out what's going on with his eyes. Like if he's using eyeliner, what's going on? I think those are his eyes. Okay.

Who's this? Rick. The guy who looks like… Who showed up in the he also he seems a little bit like he's got pale he's got it well as a pale we all have to get on in life and bloody do no i just mean he always looks like he's given blood like 10 minutes ago in my opinion oh he looks a looks a bit gaunt. The eyes are dark and all that type of stuff. He has a very...

There's something about his look that is unique. He would be a good... He's giving blood. He would be a good butler in a haunted house. Yeah. Like Alec and Rick are both...

You've come to the right house. Alec and Rick are both kind of your like, you know, basic white men except that Rick doesn't look basic and Alec looks like...

You know, I saw Alec in the rose ceremony. I was like, I don't know who this guy is, except that he's going home. You know, just bye. There's no charm. Is Rodney still there? They got rid of Rodney? No.

Yeah, Rodney's still there. They did the apple test. Oh, yeah, Rodney. He's got no chance, Rodney. He just pops up all the time. He's like, ah, I… Yeah, Rodney's still there. They did the apple test. Oh, yeah. Rodney. He's got no chance, Rodney. He just pops up all the time. He's like, I'm still playing. How do you get the apple game wrong?

I think… Do you… I think… Okay. Do you actually… Rodney ate pizza in the end. He thought it was lasagna. I remember now.

Yeah. Yeah. And then… Taste buds are off. I think you could get the apples wrong. A green apple to a red apple. Especially if you have the red apple first.

Like, I think if you have the really sour one first, then it's easy. But if you have the red one first, you have no proxy for sour. I'm willing to go blind taste test on apples

and get it 100% across. It's harder than you think blind taste test. You always watch, like, Hell's Kitchen. They do it. These people are chefs and they cover up and it's like, this is carrots and they just go, corn. You know what I mean? They're way out.

Me and the wife have done it a few times where we've put different flavored ice creams and I got a taste and I haven't always been correct. I haven't always got it. This is how boring me and my wife are. I was going to say, if you need to space it up. This is how boring the two of us are. I was going to say, if you need to space it up. This is how boring the two of us are. We had three different bottled waters in the house

and we lined them up in glasses and we tried to decide which one was the most expensive. We got it right, actually, but I thought, fucking hell, we've been in quarantine for a long time. You know what? I'm critical of Rodney, but let's do it this week.

I was just thinking, a little TikTok segment. I don't even know if it needs to be a TikTok segment, but I'll either... We'll document it and I'll let the audience know next week. Have three different types of apples. And apologize to Rodney if I get it wrong because I'm pretty sure I would not call it lasagna if it was pizza.

Just that texture. Yeah, but maybe he has some shitty fucking lasagna. Maybe his mother was a bad cook and had a hard bottom on it that's been in the baking tray so long yeah maybe maybe he maybe he doesn't eat gluten well the real thing is you should never eat lasagna with your hand that should have been a dead giveaway that it was being hand fed to him there's that yeah yeah context yes you go all right it's not it's not a new utensil it can't be lasagna yeah and a blind test you have to use your other seven six sentence six senses how many senses do you think you have seven five

what are the seven senses nick give us all the seven wonders of the world. One of them is spider. We have five? We got five senses. Touch, taste, sight, hearing. Smell. Smell. Yeah. I remember a friend of mine had COVID and they're like, it's not that bad.

I just can't smell or taste anything. I'm like, it's not that bad. You've lost two of your five fucking senses. Brutal. Brutal. At least it wasn't like hearing and sight. It's not one of the big three, but it's still… Yeah, yeah, yeah.

The ones you want to lose are those two. For sure. They're the ones you want to flick out the quickest. When you have the apples, will they be sliced? Or do you want to bite into them? I feel like the texture of biting into them might make it a bit easier. Well, I think if we want to be able to utilize our other senses as much, we would not slice them.

Yeah. Because the difficulty... The touch. Or the texture. Like a Granny Smith is a harder apple. Oh, yeah. Relative to the Macintosh. A pink lady has some give to her. Yeah. Or a Royal Gala. Or a Fiji. Fiji's sweeter. Yeah.

Yeah. I know my apples. Who's more of a frown? Joeiji sweeter. Yeah. Yeah. I know my apples. Who's more of a frontrunner, Joe or Nate? Joe all day. Joe's number one. I think it's close. I'm excited for this season because I think we have two clear frontrunners in Nate and Joe,

and they look like they both, on their own, would make sense. They, you know, tall, athletic, very charming guys. They have a natural connection with Michelle. And the best possible seasons are when the lead likes at least two people a lot. You know, a lot of times it's like they pretend to like three, but they're only into one. And I think she's really into both these guys. And maybe she might, she's also into Jamie right now.

But that makes for a potential really compelling season when you have the lead. You know what's good about Joe? He already lives in a town. Because that's always got to be the hardest thing with the bachelors. And now we're done. Where am I moving to? It's like who's uprooting their life and finding a new career after.

It's hard to move. You've got to make new friends and shit. I think like if you both don't live in the same city, you should both pack up and just come to LA or New York or pick a big city where you can become Instagram folk or whatever you want to be. But like they both live in Michigan, Minnesota. No.

I mean, Blake and Katieie i think a lot of people minus her getting mad at you know giving greg a lot more of attention than blake at afr like blake lived in nova scotia or like the east side of canada and katie like moved to san diego where the rest of the cast of her men lived and And everyone was like, okay, maybe this might not work out. So that makes a difference. I just think in that position, I think it's a cherry on top rather than she's not going to pick a guy

just because he lives in Minnesota. But she did say the background thing in terms of how they come up through this, how they have a really shared worldview in a hyper-specific way. I think the fact that she has a natural connection. Like if Joe was from Miami, she would like

Joe. Right. But the fact that he is from Minnesota and she likes him regardless of where he's from is a huge advantage for Joe. Yeah, but he was named basketballer of the week or some shit. Mr. Minnesota basketballer. And she's like from Minnesota Basketballer. Oh, yeah.

And she's like… And if you're from Minnesota, you know. She said, oh, is there a trophy? Or did they just announce it? I think it's the clout. Yeah. Oh, yeah. It's like a local newspaper or like a state magazine.

It's like the state high school association will vote. He's clearly good at basketball. And she was… There's a clear… Yeah, but neither of them made the NBA did they or the WNBA

none of them went pro they played D1 that's pretty good what's that D1 college yeah that's pretty good who gives a shit do they get paid for it

no I bet Joe had a chance to play professionally in Europe yeah but he's too busy flipping houses maybe that's where maybe that's where he got the money

to make that initial capital investment. There's a multiple league. There's an Australian league. My sister played professional basketball in Europe and the men can make some serious money. Then why would you do that and not flip houses? Maybe he did and we just didn't talk about it.

Oh, bullshit. He never fucking did it. Joe was no good. I can tell he comes up and he has the three-pointer. If someone was really blocking him, he's no good. He was all open shots in that game. I'm sure we're going to learn about what stopped his career at his one-on-one date.

You know, like, I'm sure it's going to be, like, the Achilles or… I hope not. Like, the… The athlete's classic. Oh, the classic, like, almost athlete on the show.

Like, they're… Talk about, like, the non-sad story that they make a sad story it's like always like i expect that from honestly uh but he's already started with clayton and a coach died who i was very close to sure he's already given out the dead coach but there is that i expect that i hope i i hope i'm wrong but i expect that from clayton i hope i don't see it from joe which is like you know i did a vacay to my whole life to sports and that's my whole identity. And then I didn't make pro. And now I'm just trying to figure myself like their sad story is like being the best athlete their entire life. And then going, having a cup of coffee in the pros and not being good enough. Like that, not a very relatable sad story, but that's, that's a popular sad story we hear on The Bachelor.

And it often is. I hope not. He could definitely play in the Australian League. Joe? Yeah. Maybe. I don't know. The Australian League has a rule with basketball where they're like,

you can only have two players that are immigrants. Really? Right. So the rest of the team has to be Australian. So the starting lineup is always three white guys, two black guys, because the Australian, we don't have a lot of, you know.

And Ben Simmons' father played. He was an American who came over and thing. But what happens is once they're in the league for a little while, they're like, hey, why don't you marry this Australian girl? Because then they can bring another American over. And so they try to marry him off to get citizenship.

That happens. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a real thing. Yeah, that's a real thing. They're like, you've been here for a while, become a citizen. Then we can bring another person over. You're only allowed to have two non-Australians in the team. So if he gets married to an Australian, he becomes an Australian.

Therefore, now you can have a third. And they can have a third then, yeah. That's nuts. It's a good system. It's as good as any trying to keep the you know the local talent good australia's got good basketball we want we want to bronze has that ever happened where someone meets the australian marries them and the next year there's a new american yeah that's what happened with ben simmons dad he married an australian woman had ben simmons he was playing in the australian league he married an austral Australian bird and then he had Ben Simmons and they brought in another player

yeah that happens all the time wow I don't know I feel like I'm talking about those women should be on payroll for the team you know the wives they deserve some kind of compensation

for the service they're doing I feel like they probably like them they're professional athletes that have come into town local Australian girls that are like oh he's from America he's from America.

He's very good at basketball. I think I'll go out with him for a bit. You know what I mean? Absolutely. Bogans. You know the words. You know the words. Who are your picks now?

If you get to re-pick, who would your picks be? Joe. I think Jamie will go very far. Clayton was my other pick. So you think Jamie's going to be around for a while? I think Jamie will go very far Clayton was my other pick so you think Jamie's gonna be around for a while I think Jamie will be a funnel for I think that he'll bullshit his way through it and then there'll be

a big moment where she'll throw a rose against the wall or some shit as someone who wants drama I that would be fun to watch but we like Michelle so much and we like her ability to kind of like suss out a situation and ask tough questions.

It will be to Michelle's detriment if they continue to make Jamie look like he is getting away with it, so to speak. Right. It will be kind of interesting. Can you ever turn it around on the show? Can you be the villain and then shift? It's happened with women more, like Corinne from my season, Demi,

women who still, there's people who don't like them, but they've had people be, oh, this person's going to be a villain, and then they're kind of like their outspoken, outrageous person. Do you mean on one season or just like in general in general i've seen them do it i've seen them come to paradise and have a good sense of humor about themselves and all type of stuff but i don't know if i've ever seen it once in the season i remember there was like there was like well remember those two blonde twins that got away with murder they were real fucking nasty pieces of work but the twins are the best oh i

didn't like them nasty bloody and then there was that blonde lady, and she was the villain, and she never did anything wrong. Which one? She was the one that they went on the double date, and they left her on an island. You've got to be more specific than that. I think you're talking about Olivia Caridi?

Okay. Olivia? Yeah, Olivia, I think. Olivia, yeah. Well, she did nothing wrong. No one really does anything wrong on this season. She was dressed up to be this villain. She did nothing wrong. No one really does anything wrong on this season. She was dressed up to be this villain. She did nothing wrong.

Your heroes and villains on this show are people who fuck up in one situation. Again, who knows? Maybe, again, with Jamie, what we're seeing is a guy who's clearly handling a situation poorly. Is he just maybe a guy who, through this very intense atmosphere is bringing

out an insecurity that he has maybe or like is this proving that he's the worst person ever no like no one you know like i had thomas come to one of my shows did you yeah before oh yeah you mentioned paradise and before the season had aired and he'd already he told me what happened but he shouldn't have done that yeah he was very handsome and he did nothing wrong either he just said yeah i thought about being the bachelor i just thought about it yeah i thought i could be and then they were like he's the worst person in the world did he know he was going to be the villain he was aware that he was going to be villain yes he was aware he said that uh she didn't like him very much and uh that that he was in trouble he said he was a to be villain. Yes, he was aware. He said that she didn't like him very much and that he was in trouble.

He said he was a front runner and then there was one thing that changed it and then he wasn't anymore. This was before it aired. That's accurate. When I showed up there and hosted that date, Katie gave him all the attention. She was clearly obsessed with him.

He got all Katie's time off camera, I observed and then and then a day later just cause he said I don't wanna I might be the bachelor or something

I'll tell you something off camera afterwards that he said to me I don't wanna get the lad in trouble I liked him I liked him I thought he was alright

I think we've covered other than Casey Casey I think is gonna be someone we might see around for a while because he's getting a strange amount of airtime for someone who hasn't done anything. Like, he pointed out

that he didn't like Peter as much. He's kind of, like, narrating things. He might be a surprise, which is why now I think maybe Chris won't go as far because between Casey and Chris, it's hard to tell them apart.

What about Martin? I know we don't think he'll win because of the peroxide, but I feel like he's being featured. He'll be around. He'll go around for a while. He's petty. He for sure gets a one-on-one because in the trailer, they do a whole racing date together and they're in a car. Oh, maybe. Yeah.

They go to a racetrack together. You're going to need a couple guys to go home on a two-on-one or a one-on-one. I think Martin's part of this petty drama. Like when those guys were talking and it's like, I don't know, I ain't going to stress about it. Like,

no, that was Spencer. No, Nate also said that too. When they were first talking like Martin, Martin, Skippy, they're all going to be involved in any,

like, it's like the errands. Whatever is going on, they'll find a reason to have a problem with it. They're there for the... I reckon Brandon will be in the final four. I think it'll just be like that she leaves her in. He's definitely top six. Yeah.

So you got Nate, Joe, Clayton, just because we know he's the bachelor. Yeah, Clayton. Clayton's better step up real soon. Otherwise, like… Yeah. It's like so far he's like had her spank him with a ruler and lost at basketball. And this is someone that they are going to make the bachelor

and they will give him the best possible edit they can possibly give anyone. And so far… He's not going to sing or anything. He's an afterthought. He's a medical sales rep. uh he's not going to sing or anything he's an afterthought medical sales rep so he's not going to sing or nothing well you just also have all these like very charming men who you're just like wow impressive and like and then you have like all right what odds would you give me on romeo not on romeo oh yeah romeo is one of my ones yeah right i i think romeo my gut says that he seems like he could go far, but he won't. Like, I think he's just an academic.

And I think Michelle, while she likes a guy who is smart, I think she… She likes sporty guys. Like a more kind of balanced individual. And we're just not seeing… We're not really seeing her talk with Michelle. Yeah, we don't know if they have banter. Because if they have banter,

I feel like he could be a real contender. I think he's very handsome. Oh, I think... This whole episode, I was like... I was like, maybe Romeo might be an underdog. But, like, I don't know. He's going to have to show up real soon. Otherwise, I think...

I mean, he might fall by, know like a how old is michelle michelle's 28 29 28 all right so you can write off anybody who's under 28 really she's not going out with a you know someone not not she's not gonna pick him not gonna pick him no something drastic is gonna have to happen for her not to end up with Joe or Nate. Yeah. I don't know. Rodney could pull it out at any stage. Rodney, they might do a pool date and we will fucking see. Rodney's got a massive schlong on him.

I can see Rodney being top six. No! I don't know. Rodney's getting some time with her. I wouldn't have guessed that last week, but I don't know. Rodney's getting some time with her. I wouldn't have guessed that last week, but like, I don't know. Maybe.

It's, Rick will, like. Oh, yeah. What about Rick? Rick will be around for a while, for sure. Rick will get a one-on-one.

Also, they did Mad Libs incorrectly. Can we talk about that very briefly? When Rick had them do the thing where you have the letter with all the blanks. Yeah. On the group date. Like, I feel like that's Mad Libs and the way you're supposed to do it. What are Mad Libs? Yeah, when Rick had them do the thing where you have the letter with all the blanks yeah

on the group date like I feel like that's Mad Libs and the way you're supposed to do it what are Mad Libs? yeah I don't know it's an American thing that I've seen people do but I've never really

done a Mad Lib so it's like you've got this form thing with all these fill in the blanks and you go before anyone's gotten the chance to read it you ask them for

it says like under like noun adjective and you just give random silly words at the top and then you read the whole thing together it seemed like under like noun adjective and you just give random silly words at the top and then you read the whole thing together

it seemed like that's what they were going for but it just turned into like him having open-ended compliments for Michelle to figure out sure it was a bachelor

version of that which was it was more about filling in the blank of how their date was going but like if they'd done it the normal version

at the end she could have said like whale and he would have been like and at the end, she could have said like whale. And he would have been like, and at the end of it, they shared a nice whale and like that wouldn't have gone anywhere. Yeah. For the purposes of the show and a love and a like love journey.

This was more about like, how are we feeling about each other? I'm a mad lib purist. I guess. But also this is the bachelorette. And like, in what world on the second date would you like, if a guy did that for you

on the second date, like, would you think it's in any way cute? Is he show-stoppingly hot? Yeah. If he's not, if he's show-stoppingly hot,

then I feel like the main character. If he's not, it's like the ick. It's like, why is this man? Alright, so what if I did it?

What happens then? No? Alright. Jim, it would turn me on. I thought we'd just get a laugh and we'd leave, but there was an awkward silence

where she was like, fuck, I might have to answer this. Maybe she just doesn't want to like call you show-stoppingly hot. I don't want to make your life feel weird, Jim. That was my, wow, call you show-stoppingly hot. I don't want to make your life feel weird, Gemma. That was my… Wow, you're show-stoppingly hot.

Show-stoppingly hot. Like what's happening in this show where someone so hot's come out where you're just going, show's over. Do you think Rick is show-stoppingly hot? Yeah, who's show-stoppingly hot on this? Who is show-stoppingly hot?

My opinion? Yes, your opinion. Rick is definitely not show-stoppingly hot. I thought PJ was show-stoppingly hot on this. Yeah, who is showstoppingly hot? My opinion? Yes. Yes, your opinion, yes. Rick is definitely not showstoppingly hot. I thought PJ was showstoppingly hot. Yeah. I think Nate and Joe are both showstoppingly hot. They're the good looking guys. What about Clayton?

Is he showstoppingly hot? No. If he's paying a lot of attention to me, then I think he's showstoppingly hot. He's got a nice smile. Yeah. I just, I feel like I'm… If he was like your mechanic of attention to me, then I think he shows something off. He's got a nice smile. Yeah. I just… I feel like I'm…

If he was like your mechanic, you'd be happy. Totally. Yeah. If you rocked up and he's like, I can fix this for you. I'm critical of Clayton. I'm writing fan fiction porn for… For Ali.

He's like, I gotta get this done. I'm clearly tough on Clayton because he's the next Bachelor and he just looks like such a cookie cutter old school Bachelor pic and I find it incredibly boring and I want to be surprised and wrong and so far

he is everything I hoped he wouldn't be. Which is basic, nice and boring. I'm just waiting for some sort of like interesting thing that comes out of his mouth well didn't producers say that one of the reasons they chose him to be the bachelor was because he was really good with michelle's students or like with kids yes that's so we have to see that which yeah someone should check his hard drive then like just to be sure you don't want any controversies that it may be

not that far but like that's it you get i i i reached out to the producer give me one good thing about your next bachelor good with kids okay hold i'm gonna defend it though when someone's really good with kids it is really really. In a way that is like, it's hot because I think it shows like a different kind of depth and maturity and like general capability. I feel like that's like a bare minimum. Like how hard is it to be decent with kids?

Well, kids like really read energy. I think kids are very good at like reading energies and they're really blunt. So if they don't like you, you're going to know. And I think especially like an 11-year-old, like that is a daunting task to like charm an 11-year-old. And I think it's something if it's really well executed, I could see how that really makes someone stand out.

I'll tell you, I'm very good with kids. I'm show-stoppingly good. Also, people who are childlike are good with kids too. Yeah, that's what the doctor said. Yeah, you could be immature and good with kids. I Yeah, that's what the doctor said. Yeah. You could be immature and good with kids. I don't know. To me, that doesn't be like,

oh, he should be on the next Bachelor. But Ben, that was when Ben Higgins had his moment. The first time he really shone on a group date, it was like a classroom sex ed thing. And he did a very good job. And that's when he got noticed. Because it sounds like that's... He just needs... Clayton maybe needs

to get noticed apparently he's a lovely man I'm actually a heart on him because we know he's the bachelor and I'm just wondering why and he's being outshined

by half the men on the show and it's just kind of like where where's the guy that we are going to be like so committed but is there like any merit to it being

kind of like a slow burn at first? Like you don't want him to necessarily be like the most. We know he's not final four. Yeah. So he better burn pretty quickly. Yeah but he can be like in a romantic movie when they meet him in the beginning and oh he was right in front of me the whole time. There'll be like a little. I'm sure.

Love actually type thing going on. I think it's because I know they're going to give him the best possible edit they can. And this is the best possible. This is what we got so far? This is his best possible edit so far. You wait. There's going to be an episode where he saves a child

from drowning in a river or something. He's good with kids. He saves the lives of several children. There's a burning building. He gets everyone out. Yeah. And then I will be like… Yeah.

And all the firefighters are like, fuck. Yeah. Also, would we have guessed that Rodney would have outshined Peter? No, I'm sorry. No, the other firefighter wasn't Rodney. Rodney was the apple guy. Daniel. Daniel went home. Also gone. Not into firefighters.

You don't have a shot with Michelle. Have we covered everything? I don't think we've covered enough bloody i could do this all day i won't though because i've got things to do uh jim thank you so much for coming thanks for having me i feel like it all went a bit tits up there at the end jim always a pleasure uh we'd love to have you back sometime please always let the people know you're on tour right now i'm on tour right now buy. Where can they buy tickets? JimJeffries.com. We're doing the Moist Tour.

Okay. Where'd you get on with that name? Well, you don't have to name your tours before you write the tour. I ain't just like, what are you going to call your tour? I didn't have any joke about it. And I just Googled offensive words that weren't swear words. And that was number one.

People hate the word moist. So it's called the Moist Tour. There's no jokes. I don't say the word moist on stage. You'll be safe if that word upsets you and I'm coming to I think I'm doing

the Ace Theatre coming up on like the I want to say the 6th and the 7th of November coming up and I'm about to

in LA yeah in LA you want some tickets can I yeah you want tickets do you have merch that says moist

I was going to get merch that says moist uh i was going to get merch i don't want to see you perform but i would like a shirt with the word moist on it no i just want to meet up with jim over coffee so you can tell me more about the mechanic that's gonna fix my car yeah i can i can leave your voice messages and tell you about the fan fiction we'll be fine um but uh so yeah i've got that i'm touring around we've got the podcast i don't know about that podcast and uh apart from that just chilling out man doing a few acting gigs and stuff like that but uh keeping busy awesome man well uh got a new baby so i gotta buddy take care of that that's what you're enjoying fatherhood oh it's me second time second time around yeah

it's all right was the first or the second time more easy, harder? Is it like its own defense? This has been my son's about to turn nine, and this has been slightly more difficult, the second one. I don't know. Different women. Okay. I'll get in trouble with my wife, but different experiences.

Let's just end on that note. Thanks so much, Jim. We appreciate it. Thanks for listening, guys. Don't forget to click at that link in the show bio if you want to vote for the Vile Files for Top Podcast for the Ease People Choice Award. We are back. Well, honestly, just keep listening

because the episode with Matt Walsh and Tim Simons is out. Won't want to miss that episode. And if nothing else, we will see you back on Monday.