The Viall Files - E348 Michelle Young

Episode Date: November 24, 2021

Today we are joined by the Michelle Young! In this interview we dig deep, trying to get the tea on all of the drama surrounding this season of The Bachelorette. We ask Michelle how she balances her personal life with her students after the show, her career plans for the future, and if she plans to be moving from Minnesota. We then ask about the season, getting her read on Martin’s “high maintenance” conversation, her active eye for red flags, and her relationship pet peeves as we move forward in the season. We then ask about recent rumors surrounding Nayte, and get a read on how well our guesses for the final contestants have been. We get into the real questions, so let’s dive in, and talk to Michelle!  “It’s not always going to feel good to listen to that red flag/gut reaction, but in the end it’s in your benefit to make those tough calls.” Please make sure to subscribe so you don’t miss an episode and as always send in your relationship questions to [e-mail] to be a part of our Monday episodes.  Check out our new "Introvert" merch at www.viallfiles.com today! Use code “VIALL” to get 25% off during our Black Friday Sale (offer runs 11/25-11/29) THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSORS: Pill Club: Go to http://www.ThePillClub.com/Viall to get your first birth control care package and donate to help more women in need of affordable birth control. GoMacro: Stock up on MacroBars by going to http://www.GoMacro.com and using promo code VIALL for 30% off plus free shipping on all orders over $50! Episode Socials:  @viallfiles @nickviall @michelleyoung See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

you're crazy what's going on everybody welcome back to another episode of the vile files and boy do we have a good one for you the one the only, Michelle Young is with us. The Bachelorette. We finally got an opportunity to meet Michelle, talk with Michelle, get to know her a lot more. Certainly we go into trying to figure out if she's in love and who she's in love with.

But yeah, I probably, I always do that. I always try to sell the episode. People are already listening to, it's like, we're going to have Michelle. It's natural though. You know, I don't know.

It's like, you want to give people, get people a little bit excited. How are you guys? Ladies? How are you ladies? I'm so good. Is this because of new girl?

I have googly eyes. Yeah. What happened? She's just fantastic. In a sense, we've had good communication she invited me to be you've pressed play on the movie yes i've definitely pressed play on the movie um have you stopped there's a few previews that are playing from my phone but i'm putting them on silent volume that's fine no but we had we had a very good like open communication and she invited me to be her plus one for a wedding.

But you've personally decided to look to invest in this? Oh, I knew. I've known for a while that she was always going to be the one I invested in if I felt like I was in a place to invest in someone. If I had any capital, I knew it was going her way. Gotcha. And you, Allie? Not too much.

I'm going to see Wedding Boy next weekend. Oh, that's still going on. Flash from the past. It's flash from the past. Can you imagine if you end up with this guy? I know. Only because we rewind the tape, it sounds like you fucking hated him.

That would be most of my relationships, though. That would be most of the people in my life. It's like, mom really fucking hated you when you first... You could say that about most people in my life. It's like mom really fucking hated you when you first like. Yeah, that would be, you could say that about most people I'm with. I'm very, I'm very confident in myself. So if someone's going to enter my life, it's not because I need you. It's because you like add some sort of benefit, but I'm fine alone.

Like very much fine. So in that way, I'm very noncommittal. Oh, I got bad news in the house. So I saw your Instagram stories. Are you trying to, are you running a smear campaign against the person who bought it? No, but he was a sad boy. He was a sad boy on his Insta stories last night.

I'm devastated. That's tough. The pizza looked good though. Did it taste good? Yeah, I tried to like I couldn't even get this person to for those of you people who don't know I

my mom grew up on a lake house that my grandfather built in Wisconsin in the 60s and when he died when I was nine the family sold it because it was like too much for my grandma to take care of and it's a place I've dreamt about my whole life and always dreamed about buying it back.

I have a tattoo of this house on my chest, and then it's where my parents got engaged. The church down the street is where they got married, and I wanted to... And so I always wanted to buy it back, and I'm in a position where I'm actually looking at getting other real estate or whatever. But I found out a week ago that it was up for sale only to find out that someone put an accepted offer on the day before I found out it was up for sale. That's heartbreaking.

And so, yeah. up for sure that's heartbreaking and so yeah and then i reached out and tried to like and i said i tried to communicate to the buyer because i threw their agent and i just said please tell them like this is the significance well i told them a story yes and then i said unless you think it's unless it's priceless to you, please call me because, and, and then I, I haven't got ahold of them.

And then I made a significant offer, like, like real, real money. Totally. Of like, and to the people of Wisconsin, damn.

To anyone. like it was i wasn't wasting their time with like and they weren't even willing to like name their price that's shocking to me i just don't understand why they would never have any more significance than what you have to the house unless they're like your long lost brother. That's the thing. I put out a number, like a real fucking number to the point where it's just like, should I do this? But I don't care.

If you're going to be successful and make money, to me, this was like, this is what you spend it on. Totally. I wanted to give my parents the house. And I live in Wisconsin, so I can just enjoy it when I it on. Totally. I wanted to give my parents the house. I live in Wisconsin, so I can just enjoy it when I'm there. Right.

And to be able to give my parents back the house her dad built. So cute. It was the biggest dream come true of my life, only for it to be purchased by someone who is not... I literally was offering them money to just go away. Because they already accepted my secondary offer. So I'm number two on the list.

I emailed the buyer. Because just so you know, the seller has less rights. The buyer can walk away. If escrow, things could be like, as long as the buyer does their job during escrow, the seller can't be like, just kidding, I'm going to sell it to someone else

for a higher price. And they were like, he's like, I'm heartbroken that I couldn't sell because it's the same owner that the guy who bought it from my grandfather oh they've owned it for 31 years wow and it was not like but the person who is they like wanted to apparently be on the lake but then I found out about this other property of this lady who might be selling it, so I'm trying to I'm literally desperate to try to like... You're like becoming a real estate agent to elicit a different sale.

And I'm thinking about going up higher. Like trying another number that's unreasonable. And I don't even know if they'll take that because they haven't even been willing to say, right,

here's what we need. Even if it's an outrage, like a number I literally couldn't don't even have. I just don't understand why, like why they wouldn't communicate with you about it. You know, I don't know. I just like,

maybe they've had a really long time like looking for houses and they're glad it's over, but I just don't see how you can hear the emotional, the sentimental significance, the irreplaceable place this house has in your family and say, sorry, just make money.

I offered them one-seventh of the purchase price to walk away. They could just sit there and make money and keep going on their search. Yeah, to literally just get a check for doing nothing. Exactly. One-seventh of the purchase price. Odds that this is

a family member. We just don't know. It's your dad on the other side of this whole transaction. I'm literally trying to give it to my parents. I know.

I'm just saying who else would want it that badly? I don't know. I don't know. I'm devastated. I'm trying not to... Let's wrap this up so we can go cry

anyway we have a great episode for you and Michelle is a delight and I hope you guys enjoy it don't forget to send your questions

at asknickatcastme.com cast with a K for Ask Nick episodes if you are struggling with any type of relationship or situation we probably have some answers

for you on Monday. And other than that, let's get to Michelle. Michelle, welcome. Thank you. So excited to have you. I'm excited to be here. Are you? I am. Do I not look excited?

I don't know. I'm just kidding. How are you overall? Wow. I know, big, general loaded question, but how are you feeling? You know, overall, I'm feeling actually really, really good. It's a lot to balance right now with teaching, with balancing this new crazy life that you have a spotlight on you. And so there's a lot of emotions that are going on,

but I feel like I'm embracing them or trying to at least. Are you still actively teaching right now? I'm actively teaching right now. Wow. Yes. So I have a group of fifth graders back in Minnesota. Yeah. How is that?

Well, if we even just step outside of the whole bachelorette world and balancing that, but the fact that teaching this year is unreal. It's so unreal just in a pandemic, just all of the things that we're seeing from these kids with having done virtual school last year and being in survival mode, you know, there's just so much on teacher's plates. So that in all is a lot. And then adding this bachelorette thing on top of it, it's gotten pretty interesting is it it must be hard to like i would assume it's a challenge as a teacher in general is to keep the kids focused on whatever it is you're trying to teach them and there's always like distractions that come from everywhere and then here you are technically like the distraction like is that an how do you do that like how do you and there must be an excitement level every day every like

wednesday morning like our what i will tell you is luckily i'm in an elementary school setting and so i feel like i'm able to keep that balance a little bit easier whereas you know 10 year olds 11 year olds aren't necessarily watching The Bachelor, Bachelorette. Some of them do. Can you tell who's alive and who's not? Oh, the ones who do watch it definitely bring it to my attention. But what's really cute is they'll just say something simple like, Miss Young, like, I really liked your dress last night. And I'm like, oh, thank you.

And then we move on. And I'm able to kind of keep that line and just truly have my students know that we're going to focus on school. We're going to focus on them. And they know other things about my personal life. They know about my dog and about my family. But as far as love life, we don't go into detail with that. But yeah, it's been a lot. Was staying actively teaching a big priority when you accepted this role? Or did you ever give any thought about taking a leave of absence? I would say that for me, I feel like people in general are the happiest when you're doing something that you're passionate about.

when you're doing something that you're passionate about. And this kind of role of being the bachelorette is something that I came into unexpectedly and wanted to take that opportunity to potentially find my person. But at the end of that, taking a leave of absence, stepping away from something that I'm passionate about, I don't think I'd be able to stay as balanced. And so even though it's overwhelming

and it can be stressful and there's like a lot on my plate right now, I feel like there's this other piece where I feel like I'm fulfilling something that I want to work towards and I feel like I'm going in the right direction. And so it's definitely been a tug of war match for sure, but it is keeping me balanced. Yeah. It kind of was grounded in a way. Oh, yeah. Oh, being a fifth grade teacher grounds you in general. But I will say that it's just been so nice because when I'm in that role as Miss Young, teaching is something I'm passionate about.

Working with kids is something I'm passionate about. And I'm able to do that. And I'm able to put the show down and not have to sit and think about it all the time because I don't think that's necessarily healthy either. And that's something that's really easy to do in this position. It's the bachelor world becomes your life. And that's okay.

And that's okay. And if I was passionate about that, 100%. But it's something that I feel like I wanted to have this experience, but I wanted to make sure that I stayed true to who I was. And that's working with kids. Do you anticipate always being a fifth grade teacher or are there other things you want to do in education or are you just very happy with where you're at? I actually got into education because I wanted to become an administrator. So I think my dream was to become an elementary school principal. And so right now I'm working towards that. When I went on mat season, I had to pause my master's towards working with that.

And so that's something that I'm going to be picking back up. And that's where my heart is. Now with this, yeah, there's other opportunities that open up. And that's where my heart is. Now with this, yeah, there's other opportunities that open up. And I can't say I'm going to be a fifth grade teacher for this many years because I truly don't know what doors are going to open. But I know what feels passionate to me and will stick to that. Right now it's a fifth grade teacher. But in a year or two, it might be different. It might be in a role outside of the classroom where I'm still able to work with students or I'm still able to do something that's impactful for me. Do you coach at all? Right now, I would love to coach and have had a few opportunities presented to me.

But what's difficult is that right now, I don't have the time to do that. And I want to make sure that when I step into that coaching role, I'm able to actually commit to that team and spend a ton of time with that team. And so right now, it's just I'm mentoring a few athletes. And that's kind of how handling that. And eventually, kind of when things settle down a little bit, definitely getting into coaching. I can see myself being like that teacher, coach, or administrator parent.

So I would love to coach my kids basketball team or soccer or T-ball, whatever it is. You know, I would love that. So we're really enjoying you on this season. We think you're an excellent bachelorette. One of my favorites of all time. I feel like that's a big compliment. I don't know.

Well, it's interesting because for different reasons, like Hannah Brown's season was super fun to watch. There are a lot of compelling characters. Life is stressful enough. Wouldn't you agree? I'm expecting a collective nod from everyone listening to this podcast. Well, your healthcare shouldn't be. And getting birth control, so I've heard in the market from the ladies I talk to every day,

it's a real pain in the ass sometimes to get the quality healthcare that you need. Also, you don't want to visit the doctor for something like that. That's where the pill club comes in. They make it easy, affordable, convenient for you to get the birth control that you need. Not only for, you know, I don't know, controlling birth, but maybe, you know, your skin. There's a lot of reasons. There's so many reasons women take birth control. Do you need to renew your birth control subscription? Do you want to switch birth control?

Maybe try birth control for the first time. Whether you know your brand or want to find something better, the Pill Club medical team has your back. And they're here to help you streamline that process, make it easy for you without scheduling a trip to the doctor's office or going into the pharmacy in person. They provide access to care

from the comfort of your home and delivery to your door in discreet packaging. How do you ladies feel about the convenience, affordability, and health of the Pill Club. I'm anti-errands. Errands are the worst. They take time from the meaningful stuff in life. And an annoying errand is having to go to the pharmacy every single month to get birth control. And it's like, come on, we've done it with groceries. We've done it with all with clothing. It's time for the birth control revolution. We got to make it easy.

The Pill Club is a birth control subscription prescribed by a medical professional and delivered straight to your door for free. The Pill Club carries over 120 FDA approved brands. Most brands of birth control are free with insurance or Medicaid. Otherwise, prices start as low as $7 per month without insurance. The Pill Club delivers birth control to your door

for free in discreet packaging. Right now, when you go to thepillclub.com slash V-I-A-L, The Pill Club is offering a $10 donation to bedsider.org for every VibeVal listener who becomes a patient. Your donation will help low-income individuals get access to the birth control through bedsider.org. That's thepillclub.com slash V-I-A-L to get your first birth control care package and donate to help more women in need of affordable birth control. Remember the pill club.com slash V I A L. You must use the link to make a donation. You know what we love on the show? Convenience. And sometimes we're even too lazy to mix things. And that's where Go Macro comes in. In the face of adversity and a fight for survival against

cancer, a mother and daughter took their love to the kitchen and Go Macro was born. Now they are spreading the power of a balanced plant-based lifestyle across the country with Go Macro, available in 15 mouthwatering flavors packed with 100% plant-based ingredients to fuel your body and mind.

Macro bars are made from simple, high quality ingredients and certified organic, vegan, gluten-free, kosher, non-GMO, clean, raw, and soy-free. Sounds like you're in a really delicious, healthy diet. And it's like super easy. All I know is they're good. They taste good. That's what I could tell you. Have a food allergy or dietary restriction? GoMacro offers three delicious nut-free flavors, including oatmeal, chocolate chip, maple sea salt, and sunflower butter plus coconut,

and non-certified FODMAP. Friendly flavors so that everyone can enjoy a delicious snack. Get a delicious snack and make sure it's healthy with GoMacro. That's right. It's mother-daughter owned and plant-based in a small rural community. GoMacro's mission is to spread awareness for a balanced plant-based lifestyle. So stock up on macro bars by going to gomacro.com and using promo code V-I-A-L-L for 30% off and free shipping on all orders over $50.

You're doing such an amazing job of handling the very difficult situation of being the lead of the show, right? It's a TV show. Having these authentic conversations, holding people accountable and really leaning into the situation that you're having,

which I think is, well, I know is really hard to do having been in it and having watched you, I think to myself, man, I don't know if I would have handled it the same way that Michelle did in that moment. It's easy to have a situation and then after the conversation ends, you're like, I wish I would have said this or I wish I would have handled it this way. And you seem to be really good at handling in the moment. And it seems really clear that you're someone who, well, I don't know, like we're, maybe I shouldn't assume,

because you seem really grounded and you listen very closely, like with Martin, when he was like asking, he just kind of casually threw out that women, all women in Miami are high maintenance. And I think a lot of, and I mentioned in the recap that I think a lot of people in that position might've taken the bait of just being like, yeah, I'm not high maintenance. You know, like I think Martin in that moment was used to just having someone say, you're not like most

women. And then that person receiving what perceives to be the compliment is like, yep, I'm better than everyone. But you took the time to ask, well, what do you mean by that? And why have you always been that way? Does it come from teaching or does it come from your personal romantic experiences and the highs and lows? Because you seem like you have a lot of perspective and you're seeing that on the show. I think that definitely is something that I've kind of come into like this last year or two, just with when you're in this position and you're trying to get to know all these men and it's not a lot of time to get to know them, but there's serious conversations you have to dive right in. And I think it's really easy to

get caught up in someone miscommunicating something. And so you almost have like this lens on, right? Where you are constantly looking for red flags. And that can be great at times. And then it can also be a fault if you, you know, pick too much apart. something that kind of like triggered a little bit of like an uneasy response instead of responding in a way where you know I either just like brushed it off or like bottled it up or just was confrontational I double checked and one way of doing that is just to ask okay what do you actually mean by that and kind of giving them a moment to like clarify it to make sure that I'm kind of absorbing it correctly. And it definitely comes from a relationship where communication was a big issue. Where I think both parties miscommunicated and I kind of learned from that. And there were a lot of assumptions that were made at times.

And that can be solved with a lot of times just asking another question yeah so like almost assumptions of i think actually we were talking about this before you came in of like um sometimes when we're we find ourselves in relationships we are emotionally vulnerable to being manipulated as a result of, like we were talking about, like when I found out I was being cheated on, I was living with her and we were engaged. So I was very susceptible to being manipulated by her because the truth meant that I got engaged to someone who was willing to cheat on me. And I never imagined that

for myself. And I've learned to empathize with people that want to lie themselves in a tough situation. Have you ever been in an experience like that where when you said it'd be easier to assume, right? So when you said that, I thought to myself like I would assume that the truth was something that wouldn't say something about me that I felt like I I'm the type of guy who would date someone who would cheat on me kind of thing I realized that wasn't about me you know but it took me a long time to get there you know you've talked about this past relationship in the past and I'm more interested in about like all the things that you've learned about yourself. We're not

necessarily talking about, you know, that person, but it took a lot for you obviously to acknowledge how long you stayed in that relationship that made you physically ill. What were some other takeaways that you've learned about yourself that you're now applying to your dating life now? I think I'm somebody who always wants to give people the benefit of the doubt and wants to assume the best of everyone. And I think that's a really good characteristic to have. But I also think that that sometimes leads you to putting blinders on and for me I had to take that to the next step in order to not fall back into that pattern because

it's not fun falling into that pattern you know when you're in a relationship where you feel alone that's that's a terrible feeling and that's. When you're in a relationship where you feel alone, that's a terrible feeling. And that's way more difficult than making a hard decision right up front. And so I think that's what I learned from that is that it's not going to feel good always to listen to that gut reaction and that red flag. But in the end, it's going to be easier and out of your best interest to make those calls sooner rather than later. And I think that was just what I learned so much is what I'm willing to almost like put up with in a way or just like what I'm able to push through and what I feel like I'm not or it's not healthy to push through. And I think that's what I truly learned in that I know what I can provide in relationship and how I care about the people

in my life. And I want somebody who's going to match that. What is like a pet peeve of yours that like makes your eyes roll anytime you see it, either in public or in a relationship? Like you just can't get over that people do it. Oh, this is such a hard question. I don't think I've ever answered this question before. Like a deal breaker or like a true pet peeve? Because I feel like pet peeves is like you get irritated, but you can move past it. Or like a deal breaker is like if somebody does this.

Yeah, like a non-negotiable. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, I guess it could be both. I would say that my non-negotiable. Yeah, exactly. I guess it could be both. I would say that my non-negotiable would be if they're not able to have conversations about diversity and race. That's a big thing for me. And that's something, obviously, I think you mentioned that you've experienced. It is something that I've experienced. And I think it's important.

Everybody's at certain different points with like their education and all that and all of that. And it's, you know, it doesn't have to be a man of color that I was necessarily looking for in this experience, but looking for somebody who is able to have those connections and are not connections, but able to talk about those conversations and have those difficult, uneasy, unsettling conversations and working towards educating yourself constantly, even myself included. And so I think that's a big deal breaker for me is if somebody doesn't want to have those or would shy away from having those. to have those or would shy away from having those. Yeah, because it almost seemed like,

especially in a romantic situation, almost show a lack of a willingness to have empathy, especially if you were dating someone who wasn't a person of color, because to dismiss the conversation outright would... Absolutely. It's like, okay, I guess I'll just deal with it myself. Yeah, and for me, it's just if I guess I'll just deal with it myself yeah and it's just I mean for me it's just if someone's not willing

to have that conversation with me it means that they're not willing to learn how to understand me because it's a big thing that you know do you like people in general just like do you like having deeper conversations in general with your partner like are you

hoping to... Something happens in the world and you have a feeling about it. Do you like diving deeper with your partner or do you like it kind of being more fun? I like having a partner who can wear multiple hats. I want to be able to have all different levels of conversation. I'm a very playful person. I want someone who's to have all different levels of conversation. I'm a very playful person. I want someone who's going to joke around with me. I want somebody where you're stuck in a room with them or if you were in an elevator and the elevator stopped working, you'd be able to just

hang out, make the best of it, just talk about anything. But then it's also important to have those deep conversations. So it's like, I'm not leaning towards one type of conversation, but more looking at somebody and can you have all these different types of conversations? Because think about teaching and education. There's so much that a teacher deals with during the day. There's so many things that can be infuriating, just like about students slipping through the cracks in the whole school system. And you come home and you're stressed. And there's times where you do want to talk about that but

then there's times where that becomes so emotionally exhausting that you want to be able to have partner who can just be light-hearted with you too so it's like this balance of being able to do both what is a trait that you need from your partner to make you feel the most safe in a relationship? I have to be able to trust them 100%, like without a doubt, especially in this position, right? Like there's so much with social media. There's so much with rumors of what I can imagine. And this is probably only going to be the start of all of it.

Yeah. Me bringing that up, so I'll bring this up. I heard a rumor about Nate recently. I'm trying to figure out who you pick, whether Joe or Nate. I guess it could be- It's down between the two? Huh?

It's between the two for you? For me. Okay. You're doing so well. What do you mean? You said with your top four, you're doing so well. Are you saying I got it wrong? Hey.

What? Huh? Did you just give yourself away? I'm going to stick with that. I feel like she's running cover. You really? That quick, huh? Well, I think you're quick enough to try to throw me off.

Yeah, that was a good response. Yeah. Okay, okay, okay. I'm not going to let him just assume that my top two is that obvious. No, but what I'm saying is just even with all of the seasons and coming home after filming, and I talked about this with the guys while we were kind of going through the whole filming process,

is that you go through this experience and when you're in it, it's difficult. But the difficult part is that when you get out of it, if you do end up with somebody, that's the difficult part. While the world is watching all this unfold and people have their assumptions. And so-

It's the most difficult part. Even, yeah, even my cast, like there's been so many different things that have been said about all of these men. And you know, there's times where the internet takes it and runs with it. There's times where, yeah, there might be truth to it. There might not be truth to it.

And so it's just really understanding that piece and being able to work through that. So how do you handle that? Like, you know, these guys are going out, right? They're not, they're allowed to go to bars and now they're public figures and they walk in and people get excited and then people are drinking

alcohol. Women can get flirty. Are you trying to hint at a specific rumor? I heard a rumor that Nate was at a bar and he was flirting. And regardless, that story or that rumor is a rumor told by almost everyone that goes on the show. That's true.

It's a situation that it's not the first time a front runner from the show has gone to a bar who is seen being flirty with someone. Right. But if you're in a relationship with someone who you hear that, you don't want to hear that. And you want your partner to protect the relationship. But at the same time, you know, people can say, oh, he was flirting with, there's a lot

of times people will say like, oh, they were being flirty. And it's just like, I don't know. I saw that they said hi to you, you know, like they weren't being flirty. So how, when you deal with in a relationship, like a rumor or something that's hard to hear, how do you go about handling it? Because your fears might say, well, how do I know I can trust you?

Versus I know that's how I felt too. It's just like, well, do you believe your partner because they're your best friend and like that's the person you're loyal to? Or do I, you know I listen to what I'm hearing at the risk of making my partner feel like I don't trust them? How do you balance that out? Right. Well, can we even talk about

who doesn't have a rumor out about them at this point? Right? I feel like there's... I mean, hey, light-skinned baller, right? It just never stops. True fake. going to be part of the storyline for anybody as you're basically showcasing your entire life, relationships, everything to the entire world. And things come up, but for me, it's like, if I questioned or if I did my job correctly as a bachelorette, it means that I asked the questions that I needed to ask.

And why do I feel like you're staring at me like that? You're trying to like observe, analyze my body language of who it is. Do you see this over here? I see you. We're learning a lot about each other. You're calling me out, so I'm calling you out. I see you. I see you across the table.

Okay. But I realized that if I do my job as a bachelorette, that means that I'm asking the right questions that I need to ask to be able to build a strong relationship and truly be able to let all of my walls down and trust somebody. And so that means that if I do end up with a person who there are rumors that come out, and it's only an amount of time where there's probably going to be another one thrown out about me. And it's just like, I'm making that conscious effort to have those conversations. Because on this other end of it, once I get to the other side of that,

like the person that I am or am not standing next to, whoever that is, it's like they, I have to be able to trust them unwaveringly. And if I feel like I can't do that, then I wouldn't step into the real world with them, if that makes sense. Yeah. Except the only thing I would say is that you must, like being the lead, it's a huge leap of faith no matter what right wouldn't you agree or no it is a leap of faith only so much we can learn in those hundred percent nine weeks or whatever accurate it is a leap of faith um but with that being said i think that you're able to get a read on character at times too. Yeah.

And that doesn't mean that, hey, could everything go wrong for a lead? Absolutely. Are you allowed to say whether you're happy in a relationship or not? I'm not allowed to say. You're not? It's different every season. I'm in a wonderful relationship with myself. So she's not allowed to say.

She's not allowed to say. She's not allowed to say. That's fine. They literally decide. It's like today, this season we're going to say they're happy and other times it's like I was someone who was not allowed to say that. So you put me in the spot?

Sorry. Dang, I thought we were on the same team here nick we are no but um but yeah so you might be single you might be in a relationship there's just a certain level of trust that i would need to have in order to walk away from this experience with somebody right yeah and and when you say like it's a huge leap of faith right that's are you talking about like engagement because i know that's like the ideal that's what bachelor nation wants that's what the world wants they want an engagement but it's like not this formula that you necessarily

have to follow you can walk away yeah i mean that's You can walk away by yourself. You can walk away in a relationship. And so that leap of faith, there might be different levels of leaps of faith. Fair enough. Okay. And I think that the show has progressed that way in a good way. To be totally honest, it wasn't necessarily coming from producers, honest. I, and it wasn't necessarily coming from producers, but, and I wanted it to work out, but I felt like I had to get engaged. I can understand why people would feel that pressure just from the audience itself. Yeah. And so we're, you must've thought about that going in, like what percentage of, do of, did you feel any pressure or were you determined to say,

I could be in love but not ready to get engaged and therefore I won't. Like how, what was that thought process like for you as you entered the season? I actually had this conversation with my family because my parents asked me that question of,

do you really think that you can get to know somebody to the level that you did to get engaged at the end of this and if so like would you be okay with walking away with relationship or would you be okay with walking away by yourself um could you handle that pressure and for me it's like, I wouldn't have stepped into the role as a bachelorette if I wasn't a hundred percent sure that I could just follow what I needed and what was best for me. Because like there are, everyone has their opinions. Everyone wants that beautiful love story at the end. And I mean, walking into it, yeah, I want that too. But also me doing something for the audience and for the public is not going to get me anywhere. And frankly, like this position as The Bachelorette, it is amazing. There are awesome opportunities that present itself. But it's also a reality TV show. And, you know, one week it's something and the next week it's another thing. And after my season airs and, you know, after a certain point, it's not what everybody's talking about. And at that end of that, I'm the one that has to live with my decision.

So whether that's being alone, whether that's being in a relationship, whether that's being engaged, it's me that has to live with that. And everybody's attention is elsewhere. And it's like, there might be pressure. There might feel like it's pressure. It's not going to always be a breeze. But at the end of it, it's like, I'm the one that has to live that life. One thing I've learned or realized for me, and I think being on the shows help solidify that feeling, is that feeling in love doesn't necessarily mean I'm in love. And- Are you taught infatuation?

Yeah, sure. Do you feel like it's easier to be infatuated in this process where there is one gender and then everybody's ruling over them? one gender, and then everybody's ruling over them. Yeah, I mean, I think the show is designed brilliantly to elicit those emotions. And then there's the pressure.

Yeah, and I think it's designed to make you feel like you're truly fighting for a relationship. As a lead, I suspect that you gravitated towards

two or one or three and to solidify those and protect those, you know,

you have a protective quality it seems like obviously as a teacher and you have to deal with all the personalities and

you got to make all these other men kind of feel like validated and welcomed at times, but still protect the ones that are really meaningful to you. And so when you get to the end, that can make you feel an inflated feeling towards anything when you feel like you've really fought for that.

And how did you level with your emotions as you know what was what was that's something I never figured out like what how much is this very staged atmosphere that's very controlled that can elicit real emotions but like versus like how am I going to feel when I decompress or leave this world and yeah yeah, how did you grapple with that? Or did you even worry about it? I would say that I honestly came in with a true open mindset. And whether that's like my teacher wiring,

where these kids come in a classroom and they have all these different backgrounds, like these men are coming in, they have all these different stories. And men are coming in, they have all these different stories. And I did. I kept myself open, genuinely kept myself open. And there are obviously connections. It's like human, let's be realistic.

Yes, there are connections that are stronger than others. But every time someone came and sat down and had a conversation with me, I truly was open because you can be, you can be at one spot and then you can have a two minute conversation and that can like skyrocket or you, you know, you see something that you really align with or it could make or break it. It really is. It's, it's a make or break it kind of system. And it's like, for me, I truly did stay open. I genuinely care about the men who are my season. And I felt like they genuinely cared about me too.

And I think that's where that authenticity, that genuine nature, it kind of took that worry off my plate a little bit. A couple of rapid fire questions about some of the men. Okay. Who surprised you the most? Good or bad? Both. Well, my second question, maybe we'll, hold on.

Let's start with this. I got another question. When did you realize that Martin was a fuck boy? Oh my gosh. Okay. I don't, I hate that word. I hate that phrase. Why? I don't know because, because it's a fad. I don that word. I hate that phrase. I don't know because it's a fad.

I don't know. It's like, it's what, I don't know. It's just a label. I get what you're saying, yeah. And everything like that and like at the end of it. Do you think it's an unfair criticism? No, I wouldn't necessarily. I don't know.

I don't, what entails a fuckboy? don't, I, what, what, what entails a fuckboy? What characteristics? Like, let's talk about, right? Like, how are you, how are you identifying? I guess I identify as someone, cause I, I would call like a player, someone who like actively manipulates and lies and disingenuous about their feelings in order to hook up with people. I personally think a fuckboy might be someone who's just in that part of his life where he's, I'm not into relationships. I'm going out, I'm popping the bottles,

and I'm just upfront about expectations. I don't know. Martin and I never talked about like his social life right if that's what you're entailing is like the going out and and all this different stuff like for me that is that what a lot of people are saying right now yeah no that's what i'm saying that's what you're saying okay i just like he read he to me right which he might come off as that for me i it's just like, I don't, didn't like certain parts of conversations

where like I sent Jamie home. And then on our one-on-one date, he kind of questioned that decision-making. And for me, it's like, I made, like, if you're gonna be my partner, you gotta believe in what I am saying and what I'm doing. Yeah.

And regardless. And so it was just kind of there are these phrases that were just red flags and Miami girls being high maintenance um and things like that it's just like that's just not I don't know that just that would that would never come out of my mouth. Not necessarily a bad person, but it's not going to come out of my mouth. Yeah, I think what did we say about Martin? He seems to have, he has some growing up to do.

I felt like he needs to maybe be a little more enlightened about his point of view on. Yeah. Like, is there an even playing field? He's into his bros. Yeah. I wasn't really sure if there was, it was just this thing where he never truly respected me, I felt like.

And that's not... I felt like he was preaching respect at times. And then there are times where I felt like he was really questioning me. And even in his interview, he said that I was the one that was misunderstanding. And for me, whether I was or not, which looking back on it, I don't feel like it was on me. But even if I was in that position and there was a misunderstanding, I wouldn't put it on the other person regardless. I wouldn't phrase it like that. I wouldn't, you know, that just kind of shows a view. So like for me, I'm like, okay, well,

in these conversations, if I choose Martin in life, what would life actually look like? And if we have an argument, you know, is this other person truly listening to me? Do I, am I truly able to like, am I, is he hearing me and just hearing my voice speak or is he listening right is it actually like open to what I'm saying yeah it was pretty clear watching it I think that's why I jokingly call him a fuck boy because when you ask them the why question he you could tell he was very used at saying whatever talked lot, but said nothing. Interesting observation. That's how I read Martin. And I think he's used to getting away with that. And I think he's the type of guy that guys who are cheating on their girlfriends would count on Martin to lie for them. Wow. I think you call, you're like, I was at Martin's house. And Martin's like, yeah,

I think you call, you're like, I was at Martin's house. And Martin's like, yeah, yeah, Jamie was with me. A hundred percent. So you just can't trust him. This whole persona, your opinion is, oh my gosh. You know. Am I right or wrong? Here's the deal.

I just, after that conversation, I did give him a rose. And looking back on it,'s like you sighed eventually I eventually got to the point where I'm like I'm not going to sit here and say anyone's a bad person I don't know anyone I don't know

it was true story you're just not my you're just not my person and and I don't want to have conversations like that I think those conversations

can be avoided or a person who's closed-minded like that at times it's like that's not my person and so once I truly let him go like I truly let him go and so it's I never was one to just sit back and think of okay what kind of person is he actually is he this or that it's like in this situation he's not my person and and that's it and so now.

And were you pretty because it seemed like you had a pretty decent connection with him at first. I did. I did. So he was one of the more surprise disappointments. Yeah, he was definitely

one of the stronger connections for sure. And I think. He took off those glasses. You know, it's just like smooth. Fogging up.

Like he knows what he's doing. goodness. Who is someone who surprised you in a unexpected way where maybe night one, we're not on your radar, but all of a sudden you're like, oh, okay. Rodney. Although I feel Rodney got a one-on-one that second week.

So I guess that was kind of a quick turnaround, but him, he just, he was so sweet and he was just genuine genuine but I wasn't sure if it was going to be able to move past like that friendship level and then after that one-on-one he's just he was just so much fun and he was so caring and so passionate and just was like your biggest cheerleader and that's a relationship that turned around really quickly. And I came to really, really admire. So as the season progresses, you've been really open about what you're looking for and what you've been through. And you've talked a lot about in past relationships and you being a teacher, having to be the one who almost kind of carries the relationship in some

aspects. And as someone who's looking for their forever person, you kind of want that balance. And I look at Joe and I look at Nate and I feel like, and I don't know what you're allowed to say, but I feel like you're going to be forced to make a choice between... It seems like Nate might be the type of guy

or personality you've always gone after and chased. And he elicits that immediate response. He's very charming. He's charismatic. He's fun. And I think that's... But when it gets down to it, I wonder if you're going to be...

The question I'm anticipating you asking yourself as we watch the season is like, will this be different than the past relationships? And with Joe, I feel like there's like a deep connection here. He's quite, he reminds me of your dad, as you mentioned. Yeah. But like also with Joe, will he be able to, he seems more introverted, you know, like I can picture Joe going out

and being in his head people thinking he's coming across as aloof like I see a lot of myself in Joe and so like you might also have to like with Nate you could go to a party and people coming around Nate and be like ah Nate's great

do you let Nate do his thing. Where I think in other times in relationships, you felt like you almost had to carry that person along. And with Joe, you might have to do a little bit of that. But at the same time, Joe, I feel like, has been willing and showing those kind of deeper connections and willing to really connect with you on a personal level where it seems like Nate struggles with that a little bit.

Where when you try to ask Nate a question, he kind of gives a, you know, I'm just Nate, you know? Nothing but Nate. I'm just Nate, you know? Like, what did I say? I'm sick, you know? And I feel like that will be your big challenge,

which I'm selfishly looking forward to watch you struggle with that. It's good TV. You're looking forward to my emotional pain. Yeah, but I also think you're more than capable of going through that decision-making process. And I'm curious is of those things we talked about, like what in past relationships have you felt like you haven't had the more,

like what feeling are you chasing more in your forever person? That was probably one of the biggest like internal conflicts that I was having. And I think it was Tayshia actually who gave me the advice of truly be open to all people because you can chase after the person that you've always chased after or you can also be open to other relationships and you know I was sitting in a bachelorette position because my other relationships haven't worked and so there were definitely moments where you know the audience is going to see me kind of toggling and trying to figure out what characteristics you know and i'm a very extroverted person like you know the whole thing like opposites attract and so joe's definitely

an opposite in the sense where he's very introverted um but at the same time like he had these extroverted moments and it's really hard like i mean this is an uncomfortable situation with like cameras and all that stuff and it's like i almost looked for the person who wasn't smooth sometimes because it kind of signified that like this isn't normal you like trusted the moments when they shined um not shine, like quirky moments. Yeah. Like, you know, if somebody's awkward. Is that more authentic? Not, yes, in a way. At times it's like, if you're sitting in a room full of however many cameras,

all these producers, like everybody, you know, and you're just like chill, cool. It's like, okay, I'm not really sure how to feel about that, you know? Whereas I felt like the guys who were really nervous, and honestly, I feel like they all were for a long time. Hey, maybe that's why they didn't talk to me at the sleepover date. Love y'all. But yeah, it was just like, I kind of took everything into consideration. And I've never been one for like a smooth talker.

I don't know. I've never been wooed by the smooth talker. So maybe it's not Nate. Maybe Rodney wins. Rodney. Oh my God. Rodney's. I'm sorry, but if anyone hates on Rodney,

Rodney is like the best person on this planet. Rodney's amazing. You know, what I hear, what I love about Rodney is why I hate Skippy. I call him Skippy. Chris. Chris S. I can't stand him.

And Rodney and Chris, like I said, Rodney, and I think Rodney undersells himself. He's clearly a very handsome guy, right? But his whole, I'm never the best looking or the tallest in a room. And I think I love, like I've always said, like real confidence is when you can own your insecurities. You know, it's like that takes confidence to say,

I feel so confident. And so I love that Rodney can talk about his insecurities and look at and be in the same room with Joe and Nate and still be his authentic, true self. And someone like Chris, shockingly, gets even smaller than he is in life, metaphorically, when he is threatened by someone. And that's what I love about Rodney.

He's great that way. Rodney is just this passionate, respectful, funny. He doesn't think he's charismatic, but he's very charismatic. I mean, he has everyone laughing in the room. He lights up the room too, you know? I don't think you picked Rodney, though.

No? Maybe. You're good at, you're definitely really good at not giving it away. that i feel like my biggest takeaway of this interview that you don't pick nate i could be wrong i could be wrong can you explain help us understand uh now that we know he is gone why clayton is the next bachelor because we've we've been struggling um and he seems like a really nice fellow what are you struggling with

well up until your one on one date we've only seen him smile when he gets to beat up someone through like a game well you know like the games he doesn't seem like a violent guy but he's obviously a big large guy they just haven't shown.

He's being outshined by Brandon, Nate, Joe, Rodney, literally everyone. We're just not seeing, we don't know him. We don't know anything about him. And I'm, as someone who got to spend time with him, why is Clayton, why should we look forward to following his love story what i feel like with clayton is you know when you're looking i guess i feel like people look for like what makes a good

bachelor good bachelorette everybody has their own opinion like some people are like do you genuinely want to find your person like that's probably the biggest thing that people look for right sure and the second maybe well i don't know yeah i mean but why should we care about their story why should we care about okay why should we care about clean story i saw a lot of personal growth with clayton like the man was just reflecting so much and in our conversations he did really talk about what he's learned and how like you could almost like see this person mold and not necessarily like impressionable but he truly was reflecting and growing from like point a where he started and point b where he ended and like big part of this is being able to be vulnerable being able to

talk about emotions and things like that and i think audience is going to see like a moment where he truly does just kind of collapse and he pulls on the heartstrings, you know? And yeah, I think there's a lot of men from this season who want to find that person and who are genuine people. And, you know, Clayton's being given that opportunity and I do, I hope he takes it and runs with it yeah because like uh I'm invested in Brandon's love story I'm invested in Rodney's

love story I'm invested in Joe's love story what's so hard yeah I mean what's so hard is that like obviously Clayton I mean it's not me and Clayton's love story but like the person who gets that next love story, the person who gets that next bachelor love story, I mean, it's like the audience trying to figure out who deserves that position more than the other. Yeah. I mean, I don't look at it. I hate the word deserve because like who deserves it. Right. But it's like when people are sitting here and trying to rank of who should be the next bachelor, who should be the next bachelorette, it's like, you know, we don't know all of Clayton's story. And that's the thing is we don't, we're about to find out. You know, we are about to find out, but it's like, no,

you're not gonna see necessarily as much of Clayton's love story because it's not our love story. And this season is my love story. And you are seeing other love stories within them that have stronger connections. And you are seeing other love stories within that and that have stronger connections and those are the ones being shown. And so, I mean, do I think Clayton's a great person? Yeah, I do.

And I do feel like he genuinely wants to find his person and he is the one that's being given this opportunity. And I'm definitely not a person to sit and say who's deserving more than others just because of our connection. I wasn't asking if he wasn't deserving. I was just curious. He is the Bachelor. We're going to have to watch. Why should we be excited?

I want to be excited. You want to be excited. Here's the thing that was just I don't know as much about Clayton as I did the other guys who are still around. I think that he's somebody who is just,

can truly almost reflect and then be able to talk about his emotions. That's a big part. What is the hardest part about dating you? Oh, I probably put too much on my plate at times. I'm a really bad texter. I'm a really bad texter. But you don't reply. Let me explain this. Let me explain this. No, yeah. No, I do. But for me, I really focus on the people who are in front of me. So when I'm in my classroom, I'm like, I'm not really on my phone. I don't touch my phone.

And when I'm with friends, I try to stay off my phone. When I'm with my classroom, I don't, I'm like, I'm not really on my phone. Like I don't touch my phone. And when I'm with friends, I try to stay off my phone and I'm with my family, you know, I try to stay off my phone. And so it's, I think at times, you know, if you're in a relationship, especially if this ends in a relationship, you'd be doing long distance, right? And a lot of that's texting, a lot of that's communicating over the phone. And for me, it's like I focus on the people in front of me. So would it have to be a person who's stable with not texting back and forth all day? Absolutely. That's hard to find.

Yeah, so like- That's hard to find. Well, as I was saying, you're almost like, you answered your bad habit by like, because what is really good about the answer is you're present. You're good at being present. I'm good at being present. Yeah. I'm good at being present.

Not necessarily great for long distance. But I go, go, go, go, go, go, go and I never slow down. And that can also be hard for a person who's dating me because I don't slow down. I'm very independent. There we go.

I'm very independent. If you're in a relationship, is it a non-negotiable for the person you're in a relationship with to move to Minneapolis? Um, no. That's literally all I've been seeing. That's what I that's what all, like the

whole world thinks. I grew up in Minnesota. Yes. If you said yes to moving to Minneapolis, you're still here. If you said no, you're gone. Absolutely not. So you're out. 100% team decision.

I have no idea what opportunities are going to present itself. I have no idea if I will be in Minnesota, if I will be somewhere else. You know, like right now I'm in Minnesota. Right now I'm invested in something I'm passionate about in Minnesota. But can that change? Yeah. Especially when, you know, when and if a person comes into that picture, completely changes. What's one emotion that you often feel that gets you in trouble sometimes,

like a destructive emotion that you, especially if you feel reactive or triggered by something? What is something you have to be like, ah, Michelle, ring it in. Ring it in, ring it in. I don't even know. You are coming in hot with these questions. Sorry. I'm impressed.

No, I like these. They make me think. I feel like I'm like reflecting right now. I mean, we go to the basics. I'm going to have like an internal crisis after I leave here. Color. like reflecting right now we go to the basics we're gonna be like an internal crisis after i leave here um i would just i would say that i mean there are times where like i second guess myself you know where you like is this person into me is this person not into me i think that's something

that i was trying to figure out as the bachelorette. And just because I have been in relationships where I've been the person who's invested more. And so that really, really hurt me. And that's honestly what fell. That's like why the relationship fell apart. It's why I became toxic. All these different things is that I was just so much more invested. And so I think when I'm starting to build relationships, I'm definitely like, am I more into them than they are into me? And I'm trying to like constantly feel that out. And it's not like this jealousy feeling. It's more this uncomfortable of like wanting to retreat, wanting to not be vulnerable, wanting to not, you know, be all in. you know, be all in.

Yeah. Cause like, it seems like you're someone, and I have that feeling. I think a lot of people do. I think a lot of women feel this as well. Like you're a fighter. Could someone accuse you of have been a fixer in the past or like, you know, like a fixer as in,

like you date, like you, as in you date somebody and you date them for their potential? Well, that's not why you date them, but you have an athletic background, you're competitive. And so I think if that translates into your personal relationships,

when you see the red flag or you see the problem, a part of us, and I think a lot of people relate to this feeling is oh let's work through it you know our you know I my parents still married you know oh yeah and it's just like you know you always teach you'd say hey there's the good and bad in relationships you gotta work through the bad so you're just like at a younger us was just like okay well this is bad we'll just work through the bad absolutely and how do you now know, and now in your life, what, and here you are, maybe in a relationship, and if you are, you certainly, there's going to be some struggles.

How do you know how to separate from things that you should be willing to work on that are just problems to get through or listening to your gut versus like, no, like I don't, this is like a non-negotiable, like things that you treated as pet peeves in the past that are truly non-negotiables. I really like the way that you put that. I feel like I'm having like a revelation right now. So how are you going to do that? You're good at your job.

You sound so surprised. Me? Yes. Will you actually do something here? Just kidding. See, everyone's laughing. They're like, yes, call it how it is. I'm just messing with you.

It's a common reaction. That is probably the most important thing that I've transitioned with is being that person who will be willing to fight through anything, right? Once you're in love, once you fall in love, it's like they say love is blind and you just go. You don't want to give up. You don't want to quit. You can fix anything. But in those moments where I was trying to fix, my gut was telling me something else. And so now what I realize is

that in my relationships, there are going to be moments where there are things that I'm going to want to fix, and if my gut is telling me red flags, then that's when I have to choose to listen to that and choose maybe, you know, it's not quitting, but stepping away from a relationship sometimes is the healthiest option, and so being able to listen to my gut on that and actually do what my gut is saying, because sometimes it's not always what we want.

Is there a moment in this season where we're going to be able to see that type of situation where you had to maybe listen to your gut versus what you might have in the past treated as more of a pet peeve that you could fix? Yeah, you're definitely going to see me have this moment where maybe I didn't want to ask hard questions like we talked about because you're afraid of the answers, where your feelings are and all these different things. And there is a point where, you know, where I decide that I have to, like, I did not come this far to not ask the hard questions, regardless of where, who it is, how deep the connection I feel it is. Like,

you have to ask those questions and you have to be straightforward with those questions. And that's definitely a point that I get to in the season. I feel like she doesn't end up with Nate. I do or I don't? Don't. That's my guess. Why do you look so disappointed? No, I, if you...

Wait, who's your pick? I really like Nate. And like at first when the season opened up, it was like, I was like, I don't know, Joe, like, I don't know. Also, that's not technically ghosting. Can we agree on that? That's what...

I don't know. You know me. No, we went back. We talked back and forth. And then he didn't respond. But ghosting is like... What is ghosting? Talking to someone, having an expectation.

Look up ghosting on Urban Dictionary right now. You don't trust the internet? No, not when it comes to diagnosing people. You're throwing me all these things that the internet says. No, I mean, real ghosting, what I think is,

is if you have an expectation, you're dating, maybe you're in a relationship and they just don't call. Like, they're just gone. Really? That happens. Okay, so you're like, you have to be invested for and they just don't call. They're just gone. Really? That happens. Okay, so you're like, you have to be invested

for a certain amount of time. There's an expectation of tomorrow. Yeah, no, I would say, however anyone wants to define it, it was just, I was looking to make sure that Joe was there for the right reasons, call it cliche, and that he'd be willing to have conversations. And so, I could have labeled it as ghosting but whatever. So when the season started

I was like on the fence about Joe I was like you know could he be the villain like could he you know like he the classic of he's from your hometown and not doing it in a real sense but like he could have a target on his back from some of the guys and how's this going to play out I still like Nate,

but Joe has won me. He's won you over. I'm hoping you end up with Joe. I like the relationship there. I feel like there's a good balance and I trust Joe's feelings with you so far from what I'm seeing

versus I'm waiting for Nate to... It's like we'm waiting for Nate to like, it's like we get it, Nate. You're smooth. And I like you and I like how he's handled the Chris and he was in a tough situation, but I'd like to see him open up a little bit more. Okay.

So that's where I'm at right now. So yeah, that's my feeling. What are you watching these days? Like what are your guilty pleasures what are you enjoying inside of my eyelids I'm a teacher and I'm exhausted

okay sleep I was like what the fuck does that mean it's on HBO have you heard of it I honestly was like oh my god what platform is that on he's over here searching for this new show on Hulu and Netflix and can't find it. But no, really, I've never been like a TV person. I would love to be able to sit down and binge watch a TV show.

I cannot do it. I get so antsy and I just get up and start moving. And right now, I just don't have time. I mean, I can put on a show, but I fall asleep. I mean, I'm the type of person who, in a relationship, I would spend an hour trying to figure out what movie to watch. And then once we get on that movie, I'm asleep within five minutes. Sounds like being on the best ride. All right. All right. One more tough question before we get into real some softballs and wrap it up.

Quality about your parents. Your parents obviously are close to you. You admire them. We all admire our parents as we get to be adults. We, our parents are humanized and we see them as humans and not heroes anymore. And I'm wondering what are, what's a quality about your parents that you've admire about the relationship

as individuals? And then what's something about them where you're like, hey, I'm going to try not to do that. Thank you. I still love you. You're still my hero. But like a quality about their relationship you've learned not to do that you don't want in a relationship maybe. Oh man.

Just picturing my mom and dad listening to this after. Sorry mom and dad. But their ability to just work through arguments i would say is what i've absolutely loved and kind of them having a conversation with me when i was younger just in high school about learning what type of fighter you are like what how you handle arguments because there's people who fight and need to then step away to get clarity. And there are people who, if they have a bunch of downtime, they snowball and they burn and they bubble and then they're fuming. And my mom and

dad are exact opposites. And they had to learn how to compromise and then how to like solve those arguments when somebody was upset. Do you step away? Do you, you know? And so like, that's the biggest thing that I feel like i bring into my relationships even my friendships it's a good conversation to have okay you know when we get in an argument how are we gonna like truly i mean your close friends how do you how do you fight yeah like do you need to step away for it because for me it has to be somewhere in the middle like if we just put it down for the day i will be on some other level by that like by the time we sit down and talk to talk about it doesn't mean i time we sit down and talk about it.

It doesn't mean I'm raising my voice and yelling, but it's not comfortable. I can't focus. But a trait that I feel like I would put down, I'm very much a risk taker. A huge risk taker sometimes to the point where my family's like, you're going on a reality TV show, You're doing what you're going to, you're going to change the world with reality TV show. Yeah. What's all this change in the world?

I'm like, watch me. I know. Just, just watch me watch. I'll do it. I'll figure it out. But,

um, continuing to be that risk taker, even when you get older, you know? Um, and it does, it does change things when you have kids. And I would love to be like, I'm never going to worry. I'm not going to worry to the extent that, you know, your parents worry

about you. But for me, it's just, I want to make sure that I continue to have those adventures. And I think they do, they do, you know, within their relationship, but I want to be traveling the world when I'm 80, 90. I mean, catch me jumping out of a plane, skydiving, you know, when I'm 95. I have a heart attack before I get to the ground. Hey, I mean, what a way to go out. But yeah, risk-taking. All right, we're going to wrap up by playing a game

we play with all our guests called Do You Know Me? It's real easy. Okay. We're trying to get to know you. Okay, cool. So I'm going to ask you some questions. Has Michelle Young ever done this? Have you ever done that?

Yes or no answers are fine. Anecdotal stories are welcomed, but not required. Not required. Okay, thank you. Thank you for the rubric directions. All right, you ready? Yes. Do you know me with Michelle Young?

Has Michelle ever gotten stitches? stitches yes actually on my chin same on my chin i feel why do i feel like everybody has a scar yeah i was climbing across the top of the monkey bars you know you're not supposed to do that but risk taker hey there i am climbing across um day before my family was going to leave for Disney World, and it had rained, and so it was slippery. And I slipped, cracked my chin open, and had this big wad of gauze and bandages while I was walking around Disney World. Oh, you can barely see it. Couldn't go on any.

I mean, it happened when I was in second grade. But yeah, couldn't go on many of the water rides. Has Michelle ever left a bad Yelp review? No. I don't think I've ever even left a review on the internet. Neither have I. Has Michelle ever paid for a psychic reading? No.

Do you believe in any? What's something that you, do you have any beliefs that are kind of like... I kind of like question them all. Contrary to opinion. Okay. Unscientific. I'm super curious if... I've never been to a psychic.

I'm super curious. If you go to a psychic reading, there's going to be a bunch of psychic readings in my inbox on Instagram after this. If you go to a psychic reading, do they be a bunch of psychic readings in my inbox on instagram after this when you if you go to a psychic reading do they tell you anything negative because you're paying for it and like if you go to a psychic reading and you leave feeling awful like your life's gonna end would you ever go back probably i don't i have a woman in minnesota that i'll connect you with she's the best she was awesome She does them out of her house because she lives with her mother. Who's also a psychic.

And she is fricking incredible. And she, they're just in this like suburban house in Minnesota. What do you get from it? Like, what do you, what do you, she did everything from like narrowing in on me to like my future to like

talking to people who had passed that like wanted to say something to me. Yeah. She was great. I went to McDonaldcdonald's afterwards and felt really wholesome i feel like i gave you a psychic reading i needed some nuggets oh oh my gosh yeah capitalize with the nuggets but okay so you you but you left feeling good like you left feeling enlightened yeah i left feeling like i had like more clarity on exactly like where i was going also she was the type of woman my friend went to first and out of nowhere I wasn't even there

and she was like do you have a friend named Allie and Caitlin was like internet yeah and she all no but I was in college at the time going on the bachelor and be like did you meet a Lauren my friend Allie came on the show that's why I'm laughing I was in I was in college at the time and the psychic turned to Caitlin and was like yeah well Allie's gonna go to LA for seven years but then she'll move back

to Minnesota and you guys will still be close like pulled that I was still in Chicago at that point I don't know here Nicholas where am I right now

Los Angeles I guess I freaking nailed it psychics are real crushed it okay if you could find out when you die,

would you want to know? Oh, no. Who would want to know that? I feel like. Who would want to know that? Have you seen that black mirror? I bet like half the people in the world would. I bet.

What do you think? I think it's like 50-50. I think it's a control thing also. That sounds like a black mirror episode. And there's two kinds of people. People who would and people who wouldn't. Okay. So would you want to know when you die if you also knew that it would be after

a certain age right because like your fear would be like you're dying and you're gonna pass away in three days because because to get to the answer to that question i would know whether i died before that age or not right no, what does that mean? No sense. Well, because if you're like, oh. No, like, okay, so if you said. You're like, I don't want to know. I don't want to know.

So you are going to die between ages 80. Like if they're going to give you, you're going to die between ages 80 and 90 or it's after 80, right? Like if you wanted to know that, if I'm like, okay, I know that I'm going to live to at least 85. I know that I have this much of life left

and I'm going to make it unreal. Like I'm going to make it the most amazing experience. So I guess I would have to find out that I died before 85. Yeah, exactly. That's what I'm saying. Like if you knew that it was after 85, would you still do it? Okay, no.

Do you? No, not really. I mean, no. I'm too neurotic to be like, fuck. You know? Yeah, no. Does Michelle have any reoccur you know? Yeah, no. Does Michelle have any reoccurring dreams? Yeah, I do actually.

I have this really weird dream where it started when I was in high school and I was like, I was at my house or I'm in this dream, I'm at my house and I can see, I'm like upstairs in my living room and I can see this car, like this red SUV pull up in the driveway and a person gets out. And the first time I had the dream, I was like running downstairs. I was at home by myself. I'm trying to keep that person out of the house. And

like that first time this person gets into the house, like I'm trying to hide in the house. I'm trying to escape. It's really weird. And the second time I had the dream, like he pulls up and I know that this person's coming into the house again. And every single time I had the dream, I get like closer and closer to keeping them out. It's really weird. We had a dream expert on that we interviewed yesterday. The episode hasn't come out yet, but what we learned, I can't tell you what it means by the way, because I was going to say, are you goingen me but what we will well i think the biggest takeaway of that episode and it does by the way plug it comes out soon is that our dreams especially our recurring ones are they are emotions that we are trying to process about feelings that we're having so the reoccurring dream is like

something that you're emotionally trying to process, that your dream's trying to tell you it's an emotion that you're trying to work through. Interesting. And house has a specific representation. Do you remember what it was? It was like your own personal stability, your life, where you feel the safest. And if you're having this recurring thing, it means you haven't... He said recurring dreams are like walking down a street and someone's yelling at you, but you never like turn around and address them. So they'll just keep yelling louder and louder until you fully address it. Oh, wow. Interesting. Well, I haven't had that dream in like a year. So maybe it's gone. Maybe. Yeah. Yeah. Maybe. Have you ever secretly read a significant other's text?

Yes. When I was in high school. Oh, wow. That's allowed. Person was cheating. So I guess it was worth it. But I'll tell you this. If I ever feel the need to do that, I'm not in a relationship with you anymore.

Yep. Learn from our mistakes. Does Michelle get road rage i'm gonna say no no can michelle dougie uh yeah i think so if you put on music has michelle given or received the middle finger this year um i've received it and i have not given it. I've actually never. Who gave you the middle finger? Somebody driving, but it was somebody who had road rage and I was not the only person.

What do you do when someone flips you off? Laugh. Because it's kind of a personal problem. Do you make sure that they see your laugh? I mean, maybe. I mean, if they continue to look at me I mean maybe I mean like if I mean if they continue to look at me

as they're flicking me off like I'm kind of chuckling maybe shaking my head a little bit try the thumbs up I have done that already or I've given like

the okay smile do you have a little petty in you do I have petty I don't know if someone's flicking you off when they're driving past you

I have petty and like, whatever, like, is it being petty or is it being positive? Yeah, but you get the thumbs up if you want them. Good for you. I don't know. I feel like it's deserved at that point. All right. It's not necessarily petty. Final question.

All right. Has Michelle been kissed in the past month? Yes, by my dog, Chief. Cough out. By a human being. I'm sorry. I mean, my mom and my dad kiss me on the cheek every time I see him.

Had to be asked. Dang. Michelle, thank you so much. It's been a real pleasure. We can't thank you you for taking the time we truly are enjoying you in this in this room at least

but I think everyone has the best right we wish you the best of luck hope you find love and we think it's Joe

what do you who do you think it is I am curious only after meeting you Brandon you think Brandon? You think Brandon? Okay, so are you, is this who you think it is?

Or is this who you want to win? Wait, yeah. We're going with who you think it is. Wait, wait, wait. Who do you think? That's who I think. Okay. I don't know who I want. I feel like I trust you.

Neither do I. I'm just kidding. At this point in the season. I'm going to go with single because I want to go to the basement bar at Nolo with her and that's the tea. Wait, you can't go to the basement bar or Nolo's if you're not single? I just want to go with you as your personal plus one.

So that's the tea. Well, I got you regardless on that then. Yeah, Brandon is someone I like. He's there. I don't know. I's there I don't know it's possible Chris S could come back I would judge you for that

if he came back and if I selected him you would judge me I think the whole world might you know hey you never know you never know with reality TV you never know well either way

whoever you pick I have no doubt that will be the best person for you and I wish you guys the best of luck and congratulations

if you are in fact with someone you don't have too much longer thank you this has been awesome I'm definitely leaning towards

going to a psychic when I get home so holla at me I'm gonna send you I'm sending you towards going to a psychic when I get home. Holla at me. I'm sending you my rec, don't worry. Thanks for listening, guys. Don't forget to send in your questions at asknick at castmedia.com

cast with a K for Ask Nick episodes. And if nothing else, we will see you back on Monday. Bye.