The Viall Files - E440 Breakups, Elvis Make Outs & Bachelorette Men Bios Part 1
Episode Date: June 28, 2022Welcome back to The Viall Files: Bachelor Gossip Edition! Today on our freestyle episode, we are joined by our very own Ali and Amanda, as we all return back to the studio to break down the latest in ...Bachelor Nation and Pop Culture news. On this episode we dive into the shattering breakup announcements in Bachelor Nation, talking about Nayte’s explosive 15 bullet point response to the hate comments, and a recent photo of John and Katie at a fair where John looks like he’s about to cry. We also talk about the latest trends in dating where polls have pointed out the least attractive traits a person can have, the rise in emotional intelligence over physical attractiveness, the secret love language of emojis, and the new Elvis biopic revealing a concert where Elvis made out with every girl in front of him. We then welcome on our Texting Office Hours caller who wants advice on how to shoot her shot with her dreamy chiropractor. Now, after taking a risk, will he break her back or her heart? We then bring on Eilise Guilfoyle to start breaking down the bios for the male contestants in the ever approaching season of The Bachelorette! Who are our front runners? Who has the most red flags out the gate? Check out this freestyle episode to get the tea and stick around for next week for Part 2 of our Bachelorette Bio Breakdown! “This is a PR lesson, not a love lesson.” Please make sure to subscribe so you don’t miss an episode and as always send in your relationship questions to asknick@kastmedia.com to be a part of our Monday episodes. Pre-Order Nick’s Book: https://www.abramsbooks.com/product/dont-text-your-ex-happy-birthday_9781419755491/ Check out our new "Introvert" merch at http://www.viallfiles.com today! THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSORS: Hungryroot: Go to http://www.Hungryroot.com/VIALL, to get 30% off your first delivery and get your free veggies. Fetch Rewards: Download Fetch now and use code VIALL and get 3000 points on your first receipt! → https://fetch.thld.co/viall_0622 Episode Socials: @viallfiles @nickviall @itseiliseguilfoyle @alison.vandam @liffordthebigreddog See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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That's HungryRoot.com slash V-I-A-L-L. Don't forget to use our link so they'll know we sent you. what's going on everybody welcome back to new and exciting episode of the vile files freestyle
edition and boy are we really freestyling it today.
We have a lot to get into, a lot to talk about.
Unfortunately, our guest at Chingu Gutu couldn't make it today.
She woke up not feeling well.
Don't know what her symptoms are, but we wish her well.
And we will certainly love to have her back when she's feeling better.
What?
We wish her well?
No, I'm sorry. I'm just in a silly, mood all right well that's ally uh amanda's with us it's going to
be this team today so we're going to have to hold the fort down i think we'll be we'll be okay so
we'll talk obviously the normal you know stuff the bachelor gossip the pop culture we'll have
our texting office hour tomorrow. You do
not want to miss going deeper. Adrena
Petrich from the Hills is with us.
Lots to discuss, lots to get into.
You will not want to miss
Meaty interview.
Meaty interview.
So be sure to tune into that. But special
surprise, Elise Guilfoyle
is returning onto the show
to break down with us the the men's new bios
the bachelorette bios part one will be at the end of this episode after texting office hours
and then next week elise will be with us to round it out there's like 35 dudes so like we're just
gonna have to split it up so a lot to get into and also you guys are back in the studio finally
after we really got the band back together.
Yeah, we did.
In a big way.
I feel like we're finally, it's complete.
It's not the same when it's over Zoom.
You guys are amazing.
It's true.
The vibes are off.
And I will say, obviously,
this show's been around for how many episodes now?
440.
This is the 440th.
This is the 440th.
When I started this show,
I had a vision for what this show could be
and it's evolved over time
but I feel like finally
it's really gotten to a place
that I'm happy with
and you guys are a big reason why
so thank you
oh that's so nice
so nice Nick
I've been plotting
I was like
can you say that again
I wasn't recording
no
Ali we're
it's a podcast
oh right
I'll watch it.
You're the smartest dumb person I know.
And I'm the dumbest smart person.
No, you're both pretty smart.
I thought he was going to say dumb.
He's going to be like, Amanda, you're dumb.
You're just dumb.
You know, like chaotic neutral, true neutral, evil good.
No, you guys are great.
And I think our audience is starting to
fully appreciate that i was going to because i feel like recently you've been doing a lot of
stuff that has been very like mentorly and much appreciated and i was like when do i hit nick
with my i i write very sentimental cards it's like a thing about me i don't know if i want a
sentimental card for you let's keep it professional
okay i'm just kidding when i say sentimental i just mean it's like i i say like the i feel like
i have no discomfort complimenting people in like very detailed ways and so i was like but i i i'm
careful about it because i know
it makes some people uncomfortable to be complimented holidays i guess holiday card yeah
should we send you a holiday card no it's not required but i'm saying if alias if amanda is
dying to send you a card a sentimental card amanda's gonna write a sentimental card and
meanwhile i'm texting nick being like yo can i get your advice on this text and he gives me a
like up reaction that i'm like, context.
You know what I think we should maybe do
is a Vile Files
Christmas card where the three of us go to
Kmart in matching sweaters.
Who are we sending it to?
The listeners. Each other?
I have to make
a Christmas card with Natalie and Jeff first.
Yeah, of course. Oh yeah, that would be
weird if we did one of those before that. I've never done a holiday Christmas card that Natalie and Jeff first. Yeah, of course. Oh, yeah. That would be weird if we did one of those before
that. I've never done a holiday
Christmas card that I've sent out.
Yeah, but now you're a dad. I definitely
will be in matching outfits.
That's an essential.
I saw a really funny TikTok that was
like these three siblings and they're all wearing
like black turtlenecks a la Elizabeth
Holmes. And they took the most
haunting photos. Like one where like each of them
or have like their arms on top of each other
with someone in the center, all like stone face.
Like it looks like a really creepy
Scandinavian art exhibit from the 80s.
And I was like, that's the way to do it.
Like it's, the bit works every time,
no matter what you do.
My parents used to have a coffee table book
that was like most awkward family photos.
And it was just page after page.
Yeah.
And they're like lying on top of each other's stack. like their hands like this yeah i think that's great because i feel like you have to really lean into it because it's the ones where
they take it seriously and that's prominently displayed in their like
you know staircase hallway you know i want to i want the people to know that I really think it's ridiculous.
We had a huge cork board in my family right by the dinner table. And my parents would always
put up every single holiday card we received, no discrimination. And it was very funny to track
the way families, like the divorces that happened because you see the holiday cards,
and then all of a sudden it's two
and the thing that i couldn't stop thinking about was do you know the tradition of people
who they'll write the the age of everyone on the card yes and then they never do it for the parents
23 do that yeah the brian i think it's like the aunt who's like how old is melissa now
so it's like she's 12 how do your aunts talk one more, how old is Melissa now? So it's like, she's 12. How do your aunts talk?
One more time.
How old is Melissa now?
17.
Her aunts, 90?
Now, I have two very normal, cool aunts.
That's an imagination.
I do have an update on-
The president?
No.
Oh.
The lake house.
I know I dreamed about it last night um i uh oh not
the one you bought the family one i didn't buy another lake house i just bought a property okay
but it's not the family lake house the one my grandfather built that i tried to buy yes that
i found out a day after someone bought it that it was on the market after 30 years and aggressively
tried to persuade the buyer pursue i think pursue is the right answer there was a little bribe pursuing
there was a bribe oh yeah for sure yeah they they wanted it uh the the new owner did reach out
sometime in january sent a very kind of they like promised the seller that they would reach out to
me and just kind of check in and they sent a kind of very it promised the seller that they would reach out to me and just kind of check in
and they sent a kind of very it was very professional but like hey we're reaching out
because of your history and it was kind of you know this is our plan we'll let you know if you
know it's like they bought the second home and who knows how they might feel about it maybe they
don't like owning a lake can be a lot of work kind of thing and then
like a couple weeks ago i i thought to myself you know what fuck it i had thought about reaching out
years ago and i never did i obviously regretted that because had i done that i probably would be
the proud owner of my uh that lake but so i thought you know what fuck it i'm just gonna email the guy
and just say i'm going home
for the holidays and then i was just gonna say is there any chance that me and my parents could
drive up and check it out i haven't been there since my grandfather sold it i thought i've never
i've dreamt about this place hundreds of times in my life and and so the guy emailed back and
was gracious was very kind and uh it, him and his wife.
And so me and my parents.
Said you could go?
Yeah, we're going to go up on next week, Friday.
That's exciting.
Yeah, I'm a little nervous.
And maybe by meeting him in person, it will like solidify.
I don't know.
Maybe they're having us up because like they really love it and they feel guilty, so they're just going to let us...
But they have to sell it at some point.
I don't know.
They could have kids who want to keep it in their family.
I don't know.
My hope is that they see...
I don't know.
Maybe I'll...
I suspect it will be everything I've dreamt about over the years.
I've seen pictures, but we'll see.
What if it's not?
Maybe the love they see in our face for
the property my my hope is that maybe you know they'll find another like house that move someone
else's grandfather didn't build um and doesn't have a tattoo that prominently yeah maybe you
should should i show up without a shirt yeah what if you just rip it off no i don't want i mean they
were very nice to let us come and uh we're gonna come go check you just rip it off no i don't want i mean they were very nice to let
us come and uh we're gonna come go check it out so it is an interesting question of ownership
though because technically they bought it fair and square but i do think there is on a very human
level i feel like everyone can understand that there's in like irreplaceable sentimental value
well they again they were very gracious and nice. They're having us up.
They didn't have to do that.
And so we'll see.
Maybe they are feeling it out.
It sounds like they just wanted to get on that lake.
I've heard that.
Imagine the excitement you get when you finally buy a house
and something you have looked for for a long time
and then someone comes in and says,
oh, no, wait, i have a greater desire than you
they probably wanted to get in and so we'll see how it how it goes i'm a little nervous i mean i
truly haven't i haven't seen it in 30 years it's always been this mythical place will you send us
pictures yeah i'll take pics we'll see how it goes i'm really invested but i'll update you guys uh
after afterwards and by you guys, I mean the audience.
Thank God.
We'll see how it goes.
One and the same.
Like I had dreamt about last night of like what I'm going to say when I like go up there and like if I leave, do I like, do I just let it go?
Or do I be like, oh, well, you know, let me know.
I think you figure out what the vibe is.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Are you getting along?
Are they like just doing it as a favor and really don't want to
have a conversation they seemed very friendly in the email friendly email i also think it's very
true that as someone who is as a kid very very pushy about certain things mostly trying to get
my brother to try food there's a point of heading over the cliff in terms of trying to get someone
to come around they know i want it yeah
and and i don't want to be too aggressive you cross a certain threshold where if you push that
much people shut down and they're like no matter what i'm not doing this thing for you because
you've annoyed me i think i i want them to like me yeah and my mom it's like you know because if
they don't like us they're gonna be like we're never fucking selling to these people they don't like us, they're going to be like, we're never fucking selling to these people. I don't know.
Who knows?
But we're going to just go and try to enjoy the moment.
Let's get into some Bachelor.
Some Bachelor tea.
What's going on?
Everyone's breaking up?
Yeah.
It's sad days.
You know.
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So, I know last time we discussed
that Michelle posted on her story
that she and Nate had broken up.
Nate has been, like, there's obviously been...
Is he getting bullied by Michelle's super fans?
Yeah, there's been a lot of rumors as to why this happened.
So he took to his Instagram story to give 15 bullet points of his thoughts on everything.
15.
First, no, I didn't cheat.
So we just, everyone just assumed naturally he cheated?
Yeah, because I think there was a lot of, oh, well, he was down in Austin.
He was always out partying with the boys. It created this negative connotation associated with Nate of that he was just kind of this like F boy going out, not caring about Michelle.
Okay.
Two, not every breakup needs to have someone to blame.
Three.
True.
Yes, many of you seem to paint me as a red flag slash fuck boy.
Maybe it's the piercings and tattoos.
Who knows?
But I'm actually a decent guy and I only want to continue getting better, as we should all want for ourselves.
Four, yes, the negativity and blatant hate has been hurtful during a difficult time.
Five, yes, I went on the show with no expectations, just an open mind and an open heart.
Shout out Michelle for opening it a little more, but figured I'll find my person,
then thank God I went. Six, yes, I figured off i find my person then thank god i went six
yes i truly believed michelle was my person seven sure i guess i was inexperienced in love doesn't
mean i'm a red flag not sure what else to say to this i like the way he keeps saying i'm a red flag
not this is a red flag about me but i am the red flag because i'm sure it sounds like um nate's been reading some stuff
he shouldn't be reading about himself and he's a human being and like who wants to read about how
like you're a walking red flag red flag you know especially in this climate where like obviously
you know we're trying to hold people accountable for their behaviors. And, you know, Nate's being criticized for some wild generalizations.
The show is obviously notorious for making wild generalizations about people and framing their entire persona over a highly edited, overly simplified edit.
And to Nate's point, like he's a beautiful man with tattoos and an earring, which, you know, if you were to like if you were a cartoon artist to like draw a fuckboy, you might draw Nate, I guess.
But that doesn't mean he is one.
He could be very much a respectful guy.
Also, how I describe fuckboys, I think Nate and everyone else in the dating world is now a fuckboy.
But to Nate's point, I don't think he's a walking red flag per se.
I also think it's rough being compared to Brandon,
who is the most pure.
Is that what people are doing?
No, I just, well, I think in terms of the framing that people had with him as the final choice,
being compared to this very pure, unabashedly,
unequivocally in love, sweetheart dog boy like of course nate is gonna be
like bad boy yeah i i he's really nailed it with the first uh five six i truly believe that michelle
was my person i feel like i get what he's saying but you guys just broke up. But I guess he's wanted to say, in the moment, my proposal was sincere.
Yeah.
Is probably what I'm guessing he meant.
Yeah.
All right, what else we got?
Eight.
Yes, the plan was to move to Minnesota earlier this year.
Plans changed as we decided there was no need to rush anything
and get to know each other on a deeper level
before taking a leap of living together.
There's no rush in life.
There's no rule book or timeline
on how to go about your relationship.
We believe that since the love was there,
everything would fall into place naturally
and in its own time the way it's meant to be.
Nine.
Nine.
Yes, I like to hang out with my guys
as she likes to hang out with her girls.
Nothing wrong with that.
If anything, super healthy.
We are social people.
Not everyone who goes to bars are cheaters.
He's really going with the cheating.
I mean, he's being accused of it.
Yeah.
10.
Yes, I am friends with many of the guys from Michelle's season.
It's not weird to me or her.
We're adults, not children.
We can all be friends and mature about the situation slash environment we were all in
during the show.
11.
Yes, the pressures were insane for the both of us.
12.
We tried. It didn't work we're sad
about it we all grieve differently 13 my name is baba tundi alu femi robert nathaniel alu koya and
i will never live my life based on how others think i should live it period 14 for the kind
people sending kind things and respecting both michelle and I thank you and 15 is just to peace out
yeah okay well I going back to number eight I think it was where you talked about loving each
other very much and plans changing and logistics I do think that's kind of an interesting question
I'm curious for your take on is to what extent what are the kinds of logistics that you think
love is not strong enough to overcome I mean so so many I guess how or what's the kinds of logistics that you think love is not strong enough to overcome? I mean, so many.
I guess how or what's the scope of areas where it doesn't matter how much you love someone,
like there's certain ways that you need to be aligned that love cannot over...
Listen, I mean, I don't know anything about the relationship other than it started on
The Bachelor. And I know a little bit about relationships starting in that world. But
yeah, it's like you take a huge leap of faith, right? And like, you know, Nate talked about how
they decided things take time. In my experience, you kind of have to almost keep that momentum
going. You know, Vanessa and I had this conversation. She was living in Canada at the
time I was living in LA. And we basically had a conversation that was around like in Canada at the time I was living in LA and we basically had a
conversation that was around like look like I want this let's let's give this the best possible shot
for it to work I don't know the right way to do it but I think if you go back to Canada and I stay
in LA it'll be hard to like build off of this like momentum that we have of being engaged it'll just be easy to
distance to like grow grow apart so do you think if they i mean i know they were planning on both
moving to minnesota do you think if they had done what you and vanessa did and gone straight to
minnesota and that's when i broke up so you know my guess is to nate's point they probably found
out that they weren't right for each other you know
ultimately if they break up that's you know i think that's the sign that maybe they weren't
right for each other there's no perfect way i just think you know not living together probably
didn't help or having so much distance probably didn't help but to say that's the reason would
would be would be disingenuous i think the the big question is, for me,
because obviously, like Michelle,
obviously, Michelle has a lot of fans.
This show is prominently watched by women.
And I think, you know,
we want to protect the people we love,
especially the people we're fans of.
So the people who are fans of Michelle,
whether Michelle wants them to or not,
are going to, unfortunately, some of them are going to
attack Nate. But the big question is, and we watched this show, and granted, it's overly
simplified. We watched a show in which Nate was, in fact, painted as a potential guy who
might not be ready for love. It was a discussion point that Michelle talked about. And nevertheless,
Michelle still, with that information, chose Nate, which she has the right to do.
So while I don't think we should be blaming anyone, I think if we want to hold people accountable, we have't we have to also hold Michelle accountable for picking the quote-unquote
perceived fuck boy? Again, I don't think we should do that, and I think that's oversimplifying. But
if we're going to oversimplify about Nate, let's just look at the whole picture and realize that, you know,
Michelle took a risk because she would ever felt a connection with Nate. And she didn't chose
Brandon, someone who clearly talked about how much he wants to love so bad and just settled
out and not go to bars. And that's not what Michelle wanted. And that's okay. You know,
that's not what Michelle wanted and that's okay you know and Michelle had a right to take a risk and and see if it could work out and she took that risk and it didn't work out and I think
instead of going after Nate we should just respect that it didn't try and especially Michelle she
hasn't gone out and said anything negative about Nate no or her audience to criticize him. But I also think, yeah, even if she had
chosen Brandon,
who was ready to move to her,
ready to commit, like, would have, you know,
not been, you know, going out here
and living this life that Nate is, I think
there's just as high of a likelihood
that they would have broken up, too.
Like, I just think, regardless
of your personality, whether it's the Nate
side of being super
independent and living in Austin and going out or the Brandon who would have like already had
his life in a suitcase and like moved to wherever Michelle was I just think you know so little about
each other by the time the show ends that she could have ended up with either of them but also
broken up with either of them to me me, this is more of a PR lesson
rather than a love lesson.
Because as I kind of pointed out the other week,
that upset some of Michelle's fans.
But listen, if you go on this show
and you are given this massive platform,
it's a show about finding love.
And many people follow us,
people who go on The Bachelor,
because they want to watch our love story.
Not everyone, but many, right?
So for Nate, like, go out, go out to bars,
have your fun, hang out with your boys.
But you are now in a committed relationship,
and there's going to be heightened eyes on you and expectation.
And Nate and Michelle both seem to,
based off of what they have, like, stated,
they decided to, like, live their lives how live their lives how it was before the show.
And they have the right to do that.
But from a PR standpoint, not always the smartest thing.
You just have to be a little bit more careful.
It sucks.
It's an added stress.
But the upside of that is a platform and the opportunities that come with it.
So, you know what I'm saying?
Like when I was dating Vanessa and it was private and, you know, like I was very careful
where I would go.
I was very careful where I'd be seen.
And if I'd go out to bars and clubs, I was very careful about my surroundings.
And just because Nate wasn't as careful doesn't mean he was doing anything wrong.
He just wasn't as mindful.
And so then all of a sudden people could start taking photos and like a photo could be very deceiving because all of a sudden someone five feet from you looks like they're right over your shoulder or, you know, things like that.
So to me, this is more of a lesson and either maybe Nate is done with being in the public eye.
But this is more about optics than anything else
but we wish him the best
and leave Nate alone
because like
unless Michelle
states that he did
something wrong
then it would be
unfair for you
to assume that
he's done anything
incorrect
agreed
should we move on
to more breakup news
yeah let's do it
so
Katie and John
have broken up.
They have.
And Katie posted
on her Instagram
on Monday
saying she just put
one line of text
and it said
statement colon
no, we aren't together.
That was it.
So then John posted
and he added
a little bit more context
and said,
as Katie stated earlier,
we are no longer dating.
The decision
was not made lightly
and it was obviously not an easy one to make. I love being able to share special moments with
you all, the funny ones, the happy ones, the outrageous, embarrassing, and heartfelt ones,
but I don't know if it will ever get easier to share the sad ones. I appreciate every one of
you that has supported us through this journey. We could not and would not be here without you.
So he added the context because honestly, based on Katie's, she was like the slide before
she said that was her with an animal in her arms.
So like a lot of people are like, is she joking that like she's not dating a like farm animal?
I don't know.
Like it was just it was so vague.
Yeah.
So at least he added some context.
And clearly he's still a fan of katie's because someone commented at some point
and was like a troll was questioning like why katie couldn't keep a partner and then john
commented back quote i have never been so supported or unconditionally loved by a partner
assuming and implying that katie is doing anything wrong does not sit right with me
nice of him yeah and update they were spotted at the San Diego County Fair on Thursday night.
Do we care who broke up with who as it relates to Katie's announcement?
It would seem if she broke up with him and just posted that statement, it would be really rude, I think.
Right?
Yeah.
If she was broken up with, maybe she's hurting.
If she's broken up with, then she's like she's broken up with then she's like fuck it i'm not making another statement yeah because i think when you are the one who's ending
stuff you have more incentive to try to construct a narrative and clarify what's happening this is
after the breakup this is on thursday they went to the san diego county fair tammy who's also from
bachelor nation posted it yeah look at this photo you got some guy I don't know who he is Arms around Katie You got John over to the left
And maybe it's just like, again, take it out of context
But he looks like sad
John does look a little sad
He looks a little sad
Katie does not look sad
Katie looks fine
She's in sunglasses
She has a guy have his arm around her shoulder
Don't know who that is or what that's about
But John does look like
he's sad. Did they run
into each other? No, like they were hanging
out as a group. He kind of
reminds me of that guy standing in the corner
of the party meme where it's like, they don't know
that. Yeah.
She's just putting on a good face.
It feels quick to me. If we got these
statements on Monday and they were hanging out on Thursday
night, that is a quick turnaround.
Neurodynamic started as, I guess, friends first.
Yeah.
And maybe they tried dating and maybe there was never really a hot emotional connection.
And maybe they realized they are better friends.
I don't know.
Yep.
Or maybe John's doing the classic case of, I'll just take what I can get.
You know, a lot of people do that, right?
Yeah.
You go on a breakup.
If you're the one who's not happy with you didn't want the breakup and the person who broke up with you offered you friendship, you might be inclined to take it even if it's not what makes you happy.
You do it out of sadness or desperation.
And I'm not suggesting he's desperate, but like we've all been there.
Yeah. or desperation and i'm not suggesting he's desperate but like we've all been there yeah or honestly it's just like good natured lying to yourself and convincing yourself that you can kind of evade sadness by being like oh it's not over in all capacities i could still
have this person as a friend even though yeah i just hope that whoever broke up with who that uh
both these people are empathetic and considerate to the other person's feelings her statement just
annoyed me uh-huh yeah and it's like i guess i mean katie's always done what katie wants to do
and i guess yeah we don't need these like super formal like pr copy and paste i mean she did that
with blake no they had the same copy and pasted like super big pr statement like i said it just
depends on who ended it if she ended it it, I think it's... Rude.
I mean,
if he's heartbroken,
it feels dismissive.
A bit crap.
Yeah.
Rash.
Wait,
I have a question on the breakup statements.
What is the workshop process like?
Like,
do you have a Google Doc
where you go back and forth
to each ad to it?
Do you like each ad edit?
I don't know.
I forgot what Vanessa and I did.
I think we just kind of
came up with it together.
Is there like a template,
like a form one?
Is Bachelor like involved in that in any way?
Warner Brothers?
No, not really.
So you can just announce your breakup at any time?
Yeah.
We don't need permission.
I don't know.
We signed contracts.
I don't know.
Not to stay in a relationship.
Okay.
I'm wondering if you did a study of all of the breakup statement announcements, like which phrases would come up the most?
It's with great sadness.
With great sadness, but we're still
mutual respect. We're still friends.
I think in these
you really have to let six months
is when we'll, we have to wait six months
before we get any real tea. People
start talking. We'll wait. We'll wait.
We'll still be here. We wish them
everyone well in those situations and
katie and nate like shout out to uh clayton and suzy still going strong i know we all loved uh
you know michelle our queen bachelorette and nate you know this beautiful couple we all were excited
about and we were so harsh and critical of clayton and suzy they are one of the most entertaining and cute couples on the internet they love each other they're having the time
of their lives together suzy's tiktok i love it yeah incredible yeah and and clayton is just a
willing supportive sidekick it works clayton is down to hang we didn't get to see that side of
him because he was being emotionally messy yeah so i think it's just a lesson and let's just gotta let these seasons breathe a little bit
and let the dust settle let the dust settle before we start vilifying people well on the topic of
you know how nate had his final number 15 was two deuces emojis i saw a tweet um and it was
kylie jenner saying under oath
that Blac Chyna
would ominously send her
and then the goblin emoji.
The goblin?
What's the goblin one?
Like the goblin.
It's not the devil one
because it's not the purple one.
The purple devil?
Yeah.
It's a red one
with sort of a furry.
Oh, gosh.
No, no, no.
Oh.
She would just send it
out of the blue?
Well, yeah. She would ominously send out of the blue? Well, yeah.
She would ominously send that to Kylie Jenner.
And this tweet was like, that's what made me start using that emoji.
And I was curious, like, what are people's most underrated emojis, favorite emojis?
I try not to do too many emojis.
I'm not sure you've ever sent us an emoji.
You have.
Have I?
Yeah.
What does he send? I feel good about myself that i haven't
i'm a white i like i like a white heart so does natalie natalie sends white hearts
were you influenced by each other probably i was more influenced i think probably by her
yeah but a white heart is like i love you but not too much not red heart we're not we're not
going full send like respectfully i love you yeah respectfully with love like friends it's a friendship restraint yeah do you send
natalie a red heart yeah what's the tears of love okay well i i i send red hearts like i i reply to
like some comments with red hearts which is like uh like a it's a love for a person whenever i see
that i always think about girls in concerts making
the heart sign at justin bieber that reminds me of taylor swift more than anything is that what
people do i i feel like it was a big thing in the 2000s like taylor swift fearless era
where people do the middle finger yeah i've seen why not a thumbs up i'm hip with the trends so
we're talking about desire.
We're talking about things that are desirable, non-desirable.
There's been a more recent research study building off of existing stuff that found the seven least desirable traits in partners.
What are they?
So, and I don't think these are in order.
Unambitious.
Hell yeah.
I broke up with someone over that.
Who?
These aren't gender specific?
No.
If you're unambitious or lazy, that can really bleed into other aspects of your relationship.
Because then you're like unambitious to work on things or unambitious to go out of your way to do something that you don't feel like doing or unambitious to try a new thing.
something that you don't feel like doing or unambitious to try a new thing or or then yeah and it's a really hard shortcoming to overcome because if you don't want to do something if you
don't at least have the desire or the something to make you crave better that's really hard to
create artificially versus if you're very disorganized or if you're other things that
you can sort of have someone step in and help but if you don't have that core want for something
within you, then.
Well, yeah, because like you could be dating someone who, let's say, is a bit disorganized, but maybe you're organized and you help them out.
And then they maybe excel at one thing that you are weaker on.
But like unambitious or laziness, that's a hard thing to be the person who's picking up the slack that that can really wear on.
Yeah. or even just
like on a day-to-day basis like if you're the type of person who like has a bunch of stuff and like
likes to be busy and likes to work and likes to constantly have like you know juggling several
things at once and then they're just fine not doing anything that worries me and of course it's
it's subjective but i do think that's one of the most important areas of compatibility because either you view someone as lazy which is a really hard way to look at
someone you're supposed to love or i think on the other side of things if you have a partner who
it's like you're never satisfied you always want the next thing you're always focusing on this new
thing like that's i think a disconnect your ambition levels need to be somewhat in line yeah compatible um the next big
deal the next one hostile jesus and shout out to psychology today for the line being wicked
unfriendly grumpy or malicious is unlikely a successful tactic for securing a partner. Yeah, no shit. We'll file it under duh.
What else we got?
Filthy. Filthy.
Which is not the same as messy.
No, it's not. Not the same.
Not the same. Not the same. Messy is
akin to clutter.
Filth is akin to
grime. Yes.
Okay. Arrogant?
Isn't that like obvious?
That could also be filed under duh that's i hate when people are arrogant and cocky yeah it's like one of my least favorite except
that like cockiness and arrogance and confidence are often confused and misinterpreted depending on
one's uh level of security within themselves yeah i like a quiet
confidence like you know you can handle your own you know you can like have a conversation you're
not like i hate when i feel like i have to like babysit someone at an event i like when they can
like they can handle their own arrogance would i would file on like you feel like you constantly
have to like pander to your partner to let them know like how awesome they are or they constantly talk about how awesome they are compared to other people like
if you're dating that person that can get real yeah because it's insatiable you just have to
feed feed feed feed feed feed feed forever it also is one thing that the article says is uh
although men might be less concerned about arrogance and their long or short-term partners
relative to women in a partner which i think i think in the way that sometimes men are socialized i think
something that men don't talk about a lot that's something that bothers them and i said this on a
tiktok is feeling like they're enough for anyone or their partners i i think often and maybe it's
maybe it's a downside of societal you of society and toxic masculinity or whatever, that we feel like we shouldn't have to compliment men or praise them.
But I think a downside of that is you have some men feeling very insecure about themselves. this projection of feeling insecure turns into this, it could be perceived as arrogance or cockiness
because they're not feeling validated.
And I think a lot of men often feel that way
and some of them are projecting it this way.
You know what I'm saying?
So I think as a result, I think more women might notice it
because women, I think, more vocal and and open about wanting
praise and needing you know words of information where a lot of guys would be like i don't really
need to hear how much i just deserve it or not or no or yeah or not even that but like they're just
fine you know you talked about like writing a nice note or something like that. You know what I'm saying? But I do think men need to hear that they're appreciated
and that they like to hear that they're doing a good job from anyone.
And I think a lot of men often aren't heard, don't hear that over time,
whether it's to their partners or at work or just growing up.
And I think that can lead to a lot of, say,
a toxic response to that could be arrogance or cockiness. Well, the next one is clingy. And I
think that's kind of related. I feel like there can kind of be a standoff that forms where I think
I maybe don't compliment my boyfriend enough because I don't want to come off as too putting my claws in. You will never be thought of as clingy by complimenting your boyfriend. Clingy,
from a guy's point of view, has more to do with you giving the perception that you won't be okay
without them for five minutes. Like the obsessively checking in. Short of that,
complimenting a guy is not clingy.
I think you're really great.
I think that's so cool that you did that
or asking them questions about their job
or, you know,
if they get excited about something
they're interested in
that you don't give a shit about,
like pretend to show an interest
and be like, that's really cool.
Are you kidding?
I do that all the time.
I'm not saying you don't,
but like that's,
well, I don't,
I know guys ever gonna ever get sick of that
or think of it as clingy.
I think it's just this idea
of being kind of like fawning all over someone
to me seems clingy.
And I don't think it's particularly rational.
I think it's more of-
It's hard though when you like,
you feel a certain way for someone,
you're like,
I just want to tell it to you.
And you're like,
I will hold it in.
Yeah, like,
I dated a girl in high school. So keep in mind is high school and i remember her saying i'll do anything
for you and i remember being like we need to break up uh too much walk away yeah because like you
know that was just like that felt clingy like i'll do anything for you i don't need you to do
anything for me you know like and that's different than making me feel good about myself.
You know, so like, definitely make men feel good about themselves.
It will go a long way in your relationships.
Totally.
The next one is unattractive.
Does it specify, like, physically, I'm assuming?
Yeah, I think, well, I think when I think of attraction, so much of it is physical.
But I think of it as physical, not just in the way that someone looks, but kind of the
pull you have or don't have for them.
It's so vague.
It's just like generally if you find them unattractive in any aspect, whether it's their
personality or their face, that's a turn off.
Duh.
Wait, but going off of that, going off of the attractiveness, I was looking at dating trends and like data that's been for 2022.
And there is a trend that people are valuing emotional intelligence over physical attractiveness.
So according to Match's annual Singles in America report, which is a report, emotional maturity has never been hotter.
Emotional maturity has never been hotter.
They said this year for the first time ever,
there was a drop in singles preferences for physical attractiveness
while preference for partner traits
like being open-minded and accepting increased.
83% of singles polled
are looking for emotional maturity in a partner
over physical attractiveness.
Looks fade.
Being a compassionate, progressive human doesn't.
I will say though,
on the front lines as
a matchmaker a lot of people i think it's well people people say that yeah they say it but they
don't mean it yeah my question was how do we hold people accountable the thing is is that i think
attractiveness is just a fundamental prerequisite for it's it doesn't matter how emotionally
intelligent someone is how aligned their life goals are. If they don't find them attractive, they won't want to see them again.
You have a baseline of my physical attraction.
I think what they mean is it's like, oh my God, does someone become a mega smoke show
when I'm attracted to them and they're emotionally intelligent?
Yeah.
I think this is saying people are finally starting to consider.
Yeah.
Oh, I should probably-
I heard a quote one time-
I should probably consider this.
I heard a quote one time that said, no one's perfect until you love them do we feel like that's true like if
you get deep enough into a relationship where you feel like you know enough about them to say i love
you i've said suddenly like they're the most attractive person no one's perfect until you
love their imperfections i just thought maybe like you're you would find maybe you'd find them
even more attractive in the really further into the relationship because you know other things about them.
It builds the connection and then I think you feel like you're true.
I would actually argue, yeah, no one's perfect until you've been on one date and are projecting all of the positive things about it onto them.
I think it's easiest at the beginning when you have limited data, but you have some really good data to construct this image of someone is very perfect.
And the only imperfections or the drawbacks in the situation is you being anxious about whether or not they like you back.
I think that creates a natural tension point versus once there is, you're on the same page about where you're going.
Then it's like, OK, now the real fun starts because there needs to be some, some i think friction point in any given situation
yeah but i do think people are finally starting to take that into consideration i don't know i
don't know how much actually being practiced versus at least being talked about i think it
is hot though i think it's hot to talk about well one question i ask everyone in matchmaking is how
do you personally define emotional intelligence or what's an instance where you feel like someone has shown emotional intelligence to you?
Do they say therapy?
Not really.
Almost everyone says communication.
One thing I remember someone sharing an anecdote was a guy saying, I remember I was dating
this girl and I'd had this really frustrating day at work and I was talking her through
it.
And instead of saying what happened next,
she said, and how are you feeling when that was happening?
Which I think is a really,
and he said it just,
it meant the world to him in that moment,
getting to have that question.
How did that make you feel?
How did that make you feel?
What was that like?
Totally.
Boy, that must have been hard to deal with it.
Like, what was that like?
It's like the follow-up questions are really crucial.
And the open-ended ones about really explicitly being like,
I care about your emotional experience.
Lay it out for me and I will listen with interest.
I watched a new show called The Old Man.
It's really good.
You should check it out.
But there's a line in
the show and in the line it's about this guy who's he was a spy essentially and he thinks he's
a good guy and he is like you like him too i really like the show because the whole story
is about really like who is the good guy and there's a line in in the story he's on basically
a date with a lady who got divorced and she tells two versions of her divorce and and and the guy
was like trying to make her feel better but like oh you're not the villain in this story like he
left you or blah blah blah and she goes yeah but like no one's the villain in their own story
totally and i think that was that was like I thought that was such a amazing thing to say,
especially in these times that we're in.
I've also,
no one thinks they're the bad guy in any given story,
whether it's you go on a date and you don't like,
you know,
you didn't have a good date or a relationship,
or maybe it's,
you're talking about political conversations.
Everyone thinks that they're a potential shortcoming.
It's dangerous potentially.
I think I would define my own insecurity as being panicked that I'm the villain.
That's something I worry about a lot is if i'm secretly a bad person yeah because
everybody has this tendency to really bias the world and surround themselves by friends who are
going to gas them up and validate their perspective well that's why you that's why you work here
because you have that self-awareness because you are the villain and we need one for the show
no because you have that no but you just even the thought of it even the curiosity of could I be wrong? Could someone else be right where I'm wrong?
Could I have done something better in any given situation?
Like those questions people should but often don't ask themselves is like basically you wondering if maybe you are a villain in any given situation.
And we've all been the villain.
We all are someone else's villain.
and we've all been the villain you know we all are someone else's villain yeah or when you really do the work of trying to not be hypocritical like i do this a lot with driving where i'm like honestly
have i been that car amanda have you been that car every time you flip someone off like you've
been that car yeah i don't flip people off i'm scared they're gonna hurt me yeah you know totally
yes you've been that car you've been that person you've been that bad dater you've been I don't paint
themselves as a villain and then i can talk to someone else in a friend group and all of the
details are included and they'll be like and then i shouldn't have done this but i did blah blah blah
blah and i was like i would so much rather like i'll still root for you if you're coming to me
with the full story and you can say i admit admit it, like, when you messed up, as opposed to the taking out all the-
Oh, you trust people.
Exactly.
I like to put in all the dirt.
I could have done this.
Yeah.
This is what I, I wouldn't have done that.
I probably should have done this.
Probably would have done that.
Because it's really empowering when you can tell a story and be like, and then I did a little bit of fuck shit here.
Because it takes away this, like, protective, I need to be perfect all the time.
And it's like, I'm admitting that I am flawed.
And by saying that.
And I want some feedback.
Yeah.
And by saying that in a setting with someone I love, it makes it less nasty and something
I'm running from and more of just like, okay, this is the reality of interacting with people.
Yeah.
It reminded me like, well, on Ask Nick, someone wrote.
Questions with Nick?
Questions with Nick.
Sorry.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Someone wrote, why does my ex block me?
But still looking at and still liking photos
that I'm in with friends?
And I responded, it was some version of like,
well, maybe it's not all about you.
Like another version of the story
is they just want to get over you.
And that's why they blocked you,
to protect themselves from like seeing pictures of you.
And now they're liking photos, not because you're in it, but in spite of you being in it.
They're indifferent to you being in it.
So them liking photos and you being blocked is a sign that they are actually moving on, not the opposite.
And just the fact that you're trying to-
Probably ruin this person's day.
Yeah, because the fact that they're trying to interpret the tea leaves of that just shows that. But yeah, it's good to know that like our perception
of a situation
can be drastically
like manipulated
by our desires
for the outcome
of that situation.
Especially when that desire
is to feel like
we're the good guy.
Totally.
Something to be mindful of.
Something to be mindful of.
Anyways,
the old man on Netflix,
on FX,
it's really good.
Check it out.
Final trait was abusive. Yes, another. Duh. Dialed into duh. on Netflix, on FX. It's really good. Check it out. Final trait was abusive.
Yes, another.
Duh.
Dialed into duh.
Of course, of course, of course.
Quickly, before we get to our office hours caller.
So, the new Elvis movie was released.
Exciting.
I haven't seen it yet.
Me neither.
Seems to be getting some good reviews thus far.
Gritty biopic.
But, there is a video.
He's just kissing.
He's kissing, kissing, kissing.
The ladies are flocking.
They are coming up for it, though.
My question was...
I hope this is like an 18-year-older audience.
It was the 70s.
It was a different time.
It was 1970.
But my question is, one, is there any musical artist who you would rush the stage?
Who could pull this off?
Who could pull this off?
And in 2022, who could get a...
No one can pull this off in 2022.
What male artist could get away with making out with a bunch of fans?
People would line up like this for Harry Styles, but Harry wouldn't do it.
I think he could pull it off.
But he wouldn't do it.
Why not?
Because he's like a respectful king who's like trying to reverse
i feel like these very like um misogynistic stereotypes that's why he did like the vogue
cover in the dress like i feel like he's just known i get that he's breaking the norms but why
is making out with people misogynistic no i don't think they're like one in the same i just don't
think he would take he wouldn't do the risk of being an F boy. He wouldn't take that risk.
F boy energy.
Yes.
But let me paint a different picture since we're talking about alternative realities.
What if Harry Styles front row,
there's a couple of women who just down on their luck,
just haven't been feeling their best selves.
They figured,
fuck,
I'm going to go see Harry Styles.
I'm going to try to make myself feel better.
And lo and behold, Harry Styles decides to throw a little tongue a couple of ways to some
of these women who just, or maybe even a guy, I don't know, maybe he's there to spread love to
anyone who wants to feel it. These people who are just like, they're not feeling themselves.
They're just not as confident as they used to be. Bit of a funk.
Bit of a little funk. And all of a sudden, they get to make out with Harry Styles.
And all of a sudden, they go home feeling a little bit more confident and secure.
They start focusing on themselves and investing in themselves.
Maybe they take a class or go back to school.
They always talked about doing that because I've made out with Harry Styles.
And they went and got their law degree because they always thought about
doing that. They're in night school, they're learning second languages. And now they're like
take over the world because they got to make out with Harry Styles. You don't think that could
like positively affect someone's life? I think it absolutely could. But I think part of the reason
that it would be so special is because it would feel unprecedented. And I think if you knew an artist, that was their big moves,
that they walked through the concert.
Sure.
I mean, Elvis made out with the whole room.
But let's say Harry only made out with –
Picks you out of a crowd.
He just made out with five people.
Like a One Less Lonely Girl at Justin Bieber concert.
Do you remember that?
Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
Okay, so for the Justin Bieber song, One Less Lonely Girl,
there was a tradition at concerts,
he would pick one girl from the audience who he would serenade on stage and give flowers to.
The most coveted position in the world.
Can we look these women up?
Where are they now?
The less lonely girls, where are they?
But what if, countering your point, what if that is-
They peaked too soon.
Exactly.
Yeah.
And they go in they spiral they just
been monsters ever since exactly like demanding their friends do all the work for them it's like
at every did you make out with justin bieber well i did so you go get my soft drink all their
friends leave them yeah then they don't have i want to do it where are they now with all the
women who got to kiss if you were serenaded serenaded by Justin Bieber at a concert, please email us at asknick at castmedia.com.
Cast with a K.
Sorry, Hallie.
I'm speaking for a die-hard.
I feel like that was your lawyer.
If you or someone you know has met with Sophie Leoma.
I just want a panel underneath with my phone number.
We want to hear from you.
Also, I know our texting office hours is here,
but you know he's an eight, like he's at eight,
but like he snorkels.
Are you okay?
She's a 10, but she hawks a loogie on my.
She's a 10, but she makes wildly disgusting bodily noises.
But the, the, the, the woman who apparently made, like i came up with a tiktok of the woman who made it
who like you know she kind of in a funny way is like how do you be famous and apparently she she
follows me on tiktok she listens to our show she was trying to get me or call her daddy to have her
on as a guest i commented but i don't know if we'll have her as a guest. What would we talk to her about?
Should we zoom in?
I'm guessing it would be how she came up with the idea.
Also phenomenal, though.
Also, the ones she's seen.
What are the best ones on the internet
that she's aware of?
Because there are some good ones out there.
Her name's Leah Woods.
So, Leah, congrats.
That's pretty cool.
It's a world phenomenon. It took over the internet. A global sensation.
Truly. Yeah. We'll see what she does with this success. So Texas Off Hours, let's get to it.
And after, stay tuned for part one of the Bachelor Men's Bio Breakdowns with Elise Guilfoyle.
How's it going? It's good. Thanks. I'm Christina and I'm 30 years old.
Hi, Christina. How can we help? I would like your help with asking out my chiropractor on a date.
Ooh, tell us about this back-breaking hottie. Yeah, I'll give you some context. It should be
quick. So I started seeing this chiropractor as a patient back in March. And I was referred to this practice by a friend. So I didn't know anything about the practice or the doctor.
So when you first walked in and set the stage, were you immediately taken back? Or was this like a slow build?
this like a slow slow build oh no like i'm waiting in the private room for the consultation to start and he walks in and he's so fucking hot i was very flustered and like we were going through my
health history and i was getting very like bashful i was like this is this is private information
he's like no i'm your chiropractor he's like i'm your chiropractor he was very professional i have
to say he like there was no i could not tell on his end whether or not he thought
I was attractive or not.
It's very like this is going to be a gamble when I sent him a text.
So we're going through the whole health history and we do x-rays and the whole nine yards.
And at the end of the health history, he goes to give me like the prices and the packages.
And I say to him, do I get a discount
because my birthday is coming up? And he says, Oh, how old are you turning? And I said, I'm going
to be 30. And I said that for two reasons. One, I wanted to kind of break the patient doctor dynamic.
And I also wanted him to know my age because people tend to think I'm a lot younger than I am.
And I also wanted him to know my age because people tend to think I'm a lot younger than I am.
So he says, okay, I'm guessing he's around my age.
He has a full beard.
It's like a full-fledged beard.
And he's definitely not in his 20s. He's definitely not in his 40s.
So he's somewhere in the 30 range.
I think he graduated not too long ago from chiropractic school.
Okay.
So he's early 20s.
I would say late 20s
probably late 20s early 30s early 30s yeah so right around like the age where i would date
does he have his own practice or is he an associate at another he has his own it's his
practice oh so that takes a little bit of time yeah i'm gonna guess mid 30s i agree with that
so he now knows i'm 30 and he asked what i'm doing. And I said, I'm going to Hotel Irwin in Venice.
And he's like, oh, nice.
I don't think I've been there.
And then he says, OK, I'll give you a free adjustment on your birthday.
Come back in on Friday.
So I come back in on Friday.
And the thing about chiropractic work is it takes like five minutes.
He just me.
I'm very familiar with a chiropractor.
OK, good.
So I go in on my birthday and I don't remember if anything significant happened. I was very familiar with a chiropractor. Yeah. Okay, good. So I go in on my birthday and
I don't remember if anything significant happened. I was in and out. It was a very busy time. There
were a lot of patients in the office. So I haven't seen him since March. Did you get dressed up?
I wear like a sports bra that like shows off my boobs and I'll put on makeup that's like natural.
My hair is done sort of similar to like the way my hair is now okay yeah you definitely
like you when you went to this birthday adjustment you i looked good you're like you yeah right but
like good but like not trying not trying it was coordinated though yes every every every piece was
well thought out well thought out but i definitely tried to make it look like I didn't. Sure. Yeah.
No, I hear you.
Okay.
So I go back on my birthday.
I get adjusted.
I leave and I haven't seen him since then, except for when I went in the other day.
And he sees me for the first time and he gives me a big smile and he lights up and I kind of lit up too.
And I said, hey, how's it going?
And he said, I haven't seen you in a while.
And he looks up at my chart and he goes, oh, March. Wow. It's been a really long time. He's like, Oh, that's right. It was
your birthday. And I said, yeah, good memory. And then he says, are you still playing volleyball?
And I said, yeah, actually I have an injury. I really want you to look at it. And so he adjusts
my shoulder, gives me stretches to do. And at the very end, I'm like, there's time is running out.
I can't make lemonade out of this. There's nothing there's time is running out. I have like, there's like, I can't make lemonade out of this.
Like there's nothing to it.
Time is running out.
And so I was like, what are you doing this weekend?
Anything fun?
But at this point, he's like right on to the next patient.
And it's important to like note that the adjustments happen in an open area.
So there's no privacy.
So there are patients all around us.
And so I don't know if I should ask him out in person
or via Instagram DM. And that's kind of what I want your help.
Okay. That was my next question. Like, how do you, how are you going to text this guy?
Well, I friended him on Instagram back in March. I mean, I don't know if he would approve of that,
but I friended him and he accepted. He accepted that.
Yeah. Did he follow back?
He did. Did he like any of
your photos no he didn't like anything he's not active on it he doesn't post to his stories all
right so what do we i think we dm well first off i want to ask have you done any research on
specifically your state's laws regarding doctor and patients, because it does vary state to state certain ones.
It's,
it is prohibited and against their license to date patients.
Some states have a rule where you can't be a patient for two years before
anything happens.
That's a good question.
No,
I haven't,
I haven't done that,
but I,
I mean,
I can find another chiropractor.
I'm not set on him being mine.
No,
are you saying that even if she fired him as a chiropractor,
he would have to wait two years to date her?
Some states say that.
With chiropractors, though?
They're doctors.
So it just depends.
It can be state to state.
I just asked my friend who's a chiropractor.
She said they're not allowed to, but it could vary state to state.
She's in the South, so it might be different.
So even if we send something and he turns you down,
just so you know, there could be many reasons for that, including him not wanting to lose his license potentially,
especially if he has his own practice. You've only had how many adjustments?
Three. So I could build rapport, but I don't, I don't go often enough.
My friend recommended you find a different chiropractor and then ask him out.
And then tell him I found another chiropractor? Yeah. But like, if he's not going to go out
with her, well, you want to shoot your shot. Are chiropractor? Yeah, but like if he's not going to go out with her.
Well, you want to shoot your shot.
Are you going to be able to still,
like let's say you get rejected for whatever reason.
Yeah.
Are you still going to go to him?
Of course.
I don't care.
I mean, I don't mind being rejected.
I don't necessarily want to do it in the open area
where everyone is there.
You might as well get adjusted by a hottie.
Exactly.
Yeah.
Then yeah.
To Allie's point, there might be lots of reasons why he a hottie exactly yeah then yeah to ellie's point
there might be lots of reasons why he can't but yeah i think you slide yeah shoot your shot might
as well i think it's something like good news bad news bad news i'm gonna have to find another
chiropractor good news that means we can go on a date now i like that that. That's bold. Yeah. You might as well be bold. Yeah, I would send
that. I mean, that's not out of
character. Or why don't we
flip it? Good news, bad news. Start with the good.
Like, why don't you be like, like, I don't know if you've talked
about anything that you, like, have in common or any
places that are, like, near the office. You could say,
good news, I found this place
with, like, spicy margs or, like, I
found this cute coffee shop. Bad news,
I might need to find a new chiropractor.
Like I feel like it's weird
to start with the bad news
and then go to good news.
No, but you got to hit him
with the why is it bent?
Why are you looking for
a new chiropractor?
Or is it as simple as...
But then I actually have to find
a new chiropractor
and I could potentially get rejected
and still go to him
and be able to get adjusted by Audie.
He might not want to see you after this. He might not it's possible i doubt it could she just do something as simple as
hey like found this new place would you want to go check it out next weekend or something
of course she could say that but that's not fun okay yeah i think we yeah you want a little
playfulness i think you want some confidence like i think you're hitting on an attractive chiropractor.
I doubt you're the first patients who have been like, hot.
Dreamy.
Dreamy.
Everyone wants a hot doctor.
And a hot chiropractor?
How functional.
Right?
Oh, my God.
To have a partner who's a chiropractor, that's a dream.
I know, because it's very hands-on. Yeah. Oh, my God, to have a partner who's a chiropractor, that's a dream. I know, because it's very hands-on.
Yeah, well, you're not...
Okay, so that's...
A lot of the stuff that's coming to mind for me is sexual,
which I think is probably not the route.
I think we stay away from the sex.
I think we want to keep it flirty.
Yeah, flirty but not sexual.
I like the, hey, bad news.
I think I need to find a new chiropractor.
Or what if you just sent the message,
do you want me to start with the good news or the bad news?
And then see what he says.
True.
I feel like I could start with like, hey, I have good news and bad news.
Yeah, because the only problem with, I like your idea, it's playful,
but they don't have an open line of communication.
So it really just like, this could mean anything to him.
so it really just like this could mean anything to him so let's not like rattle his cages by suggesting she actually has some potentially bad news well that's and he could read it and be like
oh fuck what well that's that's a good point but then he responds and the line is open i think also
we could throw a little try to scare him into a date i know i want them to be excited i desperately need your help exclamation point
um well what about an emoji to soften the like a playful little emoji no it's all in one message
it's like hey i have so bad news i need to find a good a new chiropractor do you have any good
recommendations don't ask for a recommend no that's too much take the question out you can
have the question you don't have the question. You can not have the question.
What's the good news?
That you want to go on a date with him.
Do I say it like I now we can go on a date or good news is.
I know because it's weird to just start with bad news.
I might need to find a new chiropractor.
I don't think so.
I just think it's confusing.
You're asking him out on a date. I don't think you wait to send the good news.
I think you send it
i agree about that i think it should all be in one oh yeah so he opens it up and he sees a message
that says bad news i need a chiropractor and his first reaction is like what and then oh she wants
to go on a date with me and if he likes her then he'll think it's funny or playful and confident
and if he can't or doesn't isn't interested he just either way he's going to give you the he can't or isn't interested, he just, either way, he's going to give you the, I can't date a patient.
Oh, are you ready?
That's going to be the response regardless.
If he doesn't want.
She's pulling out her phone.
If he doesn't want to or can't, that will be the response.
We will never know what the real reason is.
Or you could say, good news is I found this new place with spicy margaritas or something.
Yeah.
You know.
Bad news.
I might need to find a new path.
I'm dying to take you to.
Yeah.
That's what I think starting with the good news is actually.
No, Allie, you've lost that battle.
Move on.
I actually.
I might agree with Allie on this one.
But it's.
Why is it good news?
I don't know.
I like the bad news.
Because we're starting
with the conclusion we're starting with the result of the date before we've even brought
the canon of the date on the stage curiosity okay mentally are we are we definitely locked
into the good news bad news framework no because what if it was like hey there but i i think
psychologically reading it again someone she barely knows has almost no
rapport with and she's like good news i found this place we can go huh yeah but the joke is
like hey i need a chiropractor he's gonna be like what what are you talking about oh she wants to go
on a date with me like how you're taking this bad news and turning into like exciting news
potentially if he like has the hots for her. All right. You're the guy.
We'll trust you.
I think your focus is on,
I'm a confident person who likes you.
And if he likes you, he'll like that you're confident.
And either he's not interested or he can't,
and he will blame it on,
oh, I can't take my patience.
Hope that you can still work together.
And then you can say,
your follow-up to that would be like,
if the only way I can get your hands on me.
And you accuse me of going sexual.
It's like, I'll let you work on me all you want.
If the only way I can get your hands on me is in your office, then fine.
I actually think that's pretty good.
I think it's good.
I do.
You have my blessing to send that as a follow up if he turns you down
so it's funny
he'll laugh and then you show up
and you don't talk about it right
and then three months later
because I think you're planting
the seed regardless of whether he says yes now
oh and then you make
the joke and then you follow up be like in all
seriousness if you're uncomfortable
with it I can find someone else but I'm more than happy to.
Okay.
I like that disclaimer at the end.
Yeah, at the end.
But let the joke marinate.
You probably won't even have to have the disclaimer.
Like, just figure out how playful he is.
Yeah, that's true.
Because it's all been very professional up until this point.
I don't know how playful he is.
And he might not be playful.
Wait, are we positive he doesn't have a girlfriend?
Well, that's why I added him on Instagram.
He doesn't look like he has one.
You're still allowed to ask someone out if it's unclear.
Okay, fine.
All right, so bad news.
I think I might need to find a new chiropractor.
Good news is, do you have a place you'd want to take him?
I mean, there's plenty of date spots around.
I don't have one in mind.
I know this cool new place I want to take you for drinks. Yeah. take him i mean there's plenty of date spots around i don't have one in mind just say there's
this plate there's i know this cool new place i want to take you for drinks yeah and then if he
like says oh sorry i'm a doctor i'm not allowed or i don't date my patients i hope that you don't
need to still find a new chiropractor and then you say if the only way i can get your hands on me
is in your office then fine that's fine okay just for fun what if the only way I can get your hands on me is in your office, then fine. That's fine.
Okay.
Just for fun, what if the first message was,
is there any way to get your hands on me that aren't in your office?
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
I'm putting my foot down.
Too much.
It really depends.
It could be a home run with the right person.
Yeah, after all those $20 co-p copays i think it's time for you to buy
me a drink oh the worst part is is he's gonna definitely like leave you on scene for like a
half a day until he figures out because he might be like he might see this like in the middle of a
in between session sessions yeah and there's a good chance he'll leave you on rad regardless i mean i see him next in a few
weeks but it's fine because even if he doesn't respond i'll be in the office or you're gonna
have to let us know do i will let you know no exclamation points just periods right yeah yeah
no exclamation points hey bad news and good news bad news is i think i might need to find another
cairo but the good news is I know this cool place.
I want to take you for drinks.
Yes.
That's a really solid. Wow.
That's a good one. Well done.
I'm going to send it. Ready?
Yes. Go. Three, two, one.
Sent.
Yay!
We're excited to find out
what he says. Me too.
I just want her to be able to deliver that hands-on
on me line oh my god it's i hope i can send that one all right we'll see thank you guys let us know
good luck and now it's time for elise gilfoyle and part one of the bachelorette men bio breakdowns
men bio breakdowns.
Elyse.
Hello.
Welcome back.
God, feels good.
Feels good to be back.
People have been highly anticipating the bio breakdown of the new men
fighting for Rachel and Gabby's hearts.
We couldn't think of a better person
to do it with.
To break down this high school musical cast.
And you.
So we're going to do like maybe the first three or four or five.
Mm-hmm.
And then you all get to listen to the rest of this next week with me, Elise, and the
gang.
So just a little preview, a little sampling.
Little tease.
I know people are excited.
Have you looked much at the bios?
I perused.
I forget how in-depth
they are with the nonsense.
So I was like,
I feel like I'm more familiar with the ones at the top,
but then I, you know,
then I got through some of them.
Alright, well, let's not hold back.
Should we start from the top?
Let's really shame these men. Alright, let's not hold back. Let's. Should we start from the top? Let's really shame these men.
All right.
Let's judge these men.
Just disclaimer.
Yep.
This is here for,
we don't know them.
I'm sure they're lovely people.
It's all fun and games.
If you're their aunt
listening to the show,
I'll take it personally.
I'm sure they're great people.
Thinking of them as characters.
People have said worse about me.
All right.
Are we going now?
Is this alphabetical order?
It is alphabetical order.
Okay.
Alec.
We're just getting into it.
Alec, 27.
Okay.
Occupation, wedding photographer.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay, gender norms.
Susie, yeah.
Good looking.
All right.
We kind of did the picture bios.
Yeah.
So should we read the full?
These are new pictures. Well, these are their official official pictures last time we were going through like random it was like random
outside their yeah some of them were like terrible quality some some look like they got kidnapped it
was like a hostage photo correct alec these are much better photos than what they made us take. Alec is looking stunning.
Yeah, Alec's glowing.
He's a sexy man.
I mean, also as a wedding photographer, you know your angles.
You know what's flattering.
You know how a lot of guys will pick up a guitar because at the end of the day, they just want to meet women?
Yeah.
How many dates I've been on where they're like, do you mind if I?
And I'm like, I'm going to head out so bad. bad how many answers always yes i do mind yeah i actually mind heavily who knows maybe maybe uh
alec always wanted to be a wedding photographer or not to be a cynic is it possible he thought
this would be a great way to meet women i mean I say this as someone who's been on The Bachelor show a handful of times,
so I include myself in this,
but you can't put it past
someone who's willing to go
on The Bachelorette
to find love
as someone who also might
be willing to be
a wedding photographer
to meet women.
Alec is a self-proclaimed
lover boy.
Yeah.
There's like bile.
Now we know.
Now we know he definitely, i want to see some of his
wedding photos he's charismatic athletic funny and why lie he loves being the center of attention
don't lie abc is it still self-proclaimed and the lover boy was the the quoted element
alec describes marriage as sacred and he isn't interested in settling for anything less than his true soulmate.
He is looking for a passionate woman who can match his drive for success and hustle alongside him to the very end.
Alec is very much a go-getter and in order for love to go the distance, he needs someone on the same wavelength.
He says that once he's committed, he treats his partner like royalty.
Alec, let us introduce you to two queens.
It's really upsetting all around.
I think it's just also the fact that it's like
once he's committed,
he treats her like royalty.
Before that, he treats her like fucking garbage.
Didn't that have a sense of like
that this is a fuckboy paragraph yeah
this is kind of the spark notes version earn it right and i i do think i don't know if we're
getting to the fun facts but the fact that his number one fun fact i know they set them up for
this like i know that they ask them these things but nothing makes alec happier than a fresh haircut
nothing at all.
And when we get more into these, some of these guys,
they say like nothing makes them happier is quite concerning
because it's like family, maybe going to a bowling game with friends.
Like there are other things that could make you like happy.
That's odd to me.
A fresh haircut.
Nothing like a fresh fucking haircut.
He once worked as a DJ at a roller rink
Okay that is a fun fact
That is one of the few fun facts
In this packet
Are these his photos?
I found him
He's very good
He's very good
Oh my god he loves the dip
The dip and kiss
I will say when you google his business's name
The title is
The google tagline
Which he would have designed
with the website designer
unless he did it himself,
says,
best photographer in Texas.
So he really is confident.
They're good photos.
They're good.
It's giving me some like Southern vibes.
You know,
the truck and the flowers.
Yeah, sure.
I mean like,
I'm just saying.
Look,
he seems like he's talented. Yeah. Yeah. For the guy who like played the guitar, like at least he can play the guitar. Mm, sure. I mean, like, I'm just saying. Look, he seems like he's talented. Yeah.
For the guy who, like, played the guitar.
At least he can play the guitar. You know what I'm saying?
At least. I still think he did
it to pick up chicks. I mean, that's like a
that seems like a romance movie.
Like the wedding videographer, like a modern
day thing. He's very talented, though. Good for him.
Good job, Alec.
If Alec could travel back in time,
he would go back to the
1800s and be
an outlaw cowboy. Is he my soulmate?
Is he my soulmate?
I wanted nothing more than to travel west
as a young child. I had a bonnet and everything.
I had a bonnet
and everything. There's an easier way of being a bad boy.
A bonnet and a dream. Oh, no.
Yeah, that's something. But I will
say it's better. There's a guy later. I don't know who
we'll hit. And he's... We're gonna hit them all.
Oh, good. Okay.
Maybe not this episode. I do think that he said
if he could travel back, it would be to the
90s, which is... That's terrible.
Odd and strange. And it gives
me pause.
Is that because I saw the sign
hit number one on the charts like 15 weeks
in a row? He just wanted to be there for that moment.
It's like any time.
I think he was fucking born then.
Yeah.
He's like 23.
He's like, I'd love to be.
Like, what?
It's very odd.
Should we move on to any lasting comments?
Even.
No, we're moving on.
For some reason, I got an oven energy.
Also beautiful.
He's stunning.
I think even goes far because I've seen some sneaky sneak photos. That is it. He's stunning. I think Ava goes far because I've seen
some sneaky sneak photos.
That is it.
And he goes pretty far.
It's a very charming
soft smile.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, he's hot.
That's a guy
who just knows how to...
I don't know if I can
pull off that soft smile.
That's an effortless
soft smile.
God.
He's just like
throwing it away.
Yeah, he looks like
he's like a dad at his like six-year-old
soccer game on the sidelines sales executive pretty pretty standard pretty standard yeah
his life is fueled by passion oh boy cheers okay awesome because what else would it be fueled by
yeah the fucking grind yeah he wants a woman to grind with him and rise up.
I gotta say, if his life is fueled by passion,
I don't know if sales executive...
It's like he sells insurance
and his life is fueled by passion.
Whether he's slaying the sales game at work
or hooping on the weekend,
Avin slash Avin slash who knows
puts his heart into everything he does.
He tries to approach love with the same mentality,
but has yet to find his perfect match.
Ava wants a woman who is loyal, honest,
and able to organically bring out his fun side.
She should love to travel as much as he does
and will value quality time together above all else.
Ava wants to build a meaningful relationship
that goes deeper than the surface.
And when he meets the right one,
he is ready to put it all out there
if it means finding his forever.
Fun facts.
Avin enjoys slow dancing.
Hate that.
I don't believe that.
Hate that.
I find that hard to believe.
Avin allows himself to eat out only once a week.
Okay, I was half paying attention
and then clocked back in.
That was really scary.
It doesn't specify.
That was my one highlight.
I was like, absolutely not.
He's like, absolutely not.
And Avin is a Yahtzee champ and describes his
gameplay as intense.
Anyone who describes their Yahtzee
as intense, I have questions. What makes him a champ?
Like, did he... Is there some sort of,
yeah, like, championship thing
to go to? You can't self-proclaim
because did he, like, win
game night? Yeah. How is he
a champ? I do have the app
Yahtzee Addict on my phone so maybe
he's just... Maybe you and Avin
You guys could be something special. We'll play Yahtzee
together. I'll head west
with the other guy. That's what I call a full house
He allows himself to eat out
once a week is a bit of a red flag
It's scary. Allows
that verb. I don't like that.
It makes me think like his whole fridge is just meal prep after meal prep.
If he doesn't allow himself to do something, imagine what he's going to allow his partner to do.
He's a chicken and rice guy for lunch every day.
For sure.
And I mean, he looks great, but he scares me a little bit.
Maybe there's some sadness behind that beautiful smile.
He just wanted a nugget.
Yeah.
He's starving
he's so hungry you just cover up his smile and he does look a little sad yeah yeah the eyes i
understand that they all the like the i'm assuming most of these are going to include some version of
like i just want someone who brings out the best to me and i won't settle for anything but the truest of loves and i can't help but be like would you settle for a few million
instagram followers right you're going on the right what do we think about that i just want
one bio to be like fuck it why not yeah like what if your bio was like i just wanted to travel the
world and see what freaking happens yeah that'll come out later in the thing you know all right like i do think avon just by that smile alone he has to really fuck up his personality should we also say if
we think gabby or rachel will be more likely to gravitate towards i know nothing about their types
i feel like avon and rachel if we're going back to even but i don't know yeah he he has some like
charisma to him i feel like he'll go far who is more susceptible to being fuckboyed gabby or rachel i feel like gabby really i feel like
rachel really i was gonna say rachel if alec is a fuckboy and he's the being the wedding
photographer and i think rachel really loves love and that's true. You know what I'm saying? So I think the wrong guy could really make Rachel believe
that he believes all the things that she wants to believe in.
You know what I'm saying?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And I think she could be duped by someone.
I think Rachel seems to really love love.
And she kind of has a traditional wants to be romanced kind of old
soul to her and i think because i think like gabby might be more willing to ask follow-up questions
and check i also think we saw a side of gabby around the fantasy suite time where she was
talking to clayton she had that conversation she said yeah you know i want you to go out and you
know basically have these experiences with
the other women she encouraged him basically to spend the night with the other women which was
very much not rachel and not suzy so i think in that way she stood out as kind of more of the
sleep around don't you want to do like she just has that energy more like if if uh if rachel met
a brandon from michelle season who wasn't really a brandon but pretended to be a brandon
yeah game over.
I did think that Rachel in her season was like so quickly.
When I didn't even see the spark between them yet,
it was like, I'm falling in love with you super fast.
So, yeah, I mean, that could be risky,
especially when all these guys are going to lead.
So I just feel like Rachel is probably in.
I forgot that Gabby has her granddad or dad who was very.
And I think she has a little bit of grit to her
because of that.
Number three. Brandon.
I already hate a guy that spells
his name incorrectly. Brandon.
I mean, it's his name.
I feel like he is giving
me a guy
that at the bar
would make me just hang near my
friends a lot kind of energy.
Maybe it's the
suede jacket situation. Maybe
it's the smile. I'm not liking that.
He also I don't think looks
23. He looks like a grown man.
Yeah. He does. And I think he might have been
he's probably been using that to his advantage for years.
I think stylish guys sometimes
I'm just a little more wary of.
He loves Disneyland and goes every year for his birthday.
Oh, that was, again, my one highlight.
But only if he goes once a year.
That's not a Disney adult.
If you go once a year.
If you go every year for your birthday, you're a Disney adult.
If that is your activity of choice on your birthday, that's quite scary.
Not for me.
Give us a bio, Amanda.
Well, so he's 23.
He's a bartender.
And the first line of his bio is,
Brandon may be on the younger side,
but he is emotionally mature beyond his years
and is ready to find the one.
You're a bartender.
Well, let's not disparage bartenders.
I think that's a great way to grow up fast
is to be good at talking to people.
Good at talking.
And you meet a lot of people.
You could be a bartender that's engaging meet a lot of people you could be a bartender
that's engaging with a lot of different types of personalities i just think if you're bartending
at 23 like that stage of and i'm at with zero shade but that stage of life is not like you're
staying out late and it's not usually like the lifestyle of bartending is not super conducive
with like i'm gonna disagree with you on this i don't know if emotional maturity has necessarily anything to do with whether you look at the job that you have
and i do think being a bartender could elevate your emotional maturity also i would argue okay
so he's 23 it gives you he could either be out late at night as a bartender probably sober working
and making really good money are Bartenders are not sober.
Sorry, I'm not going to double down on this too much.
But I'm saying he could also be like at a club
drinking vodka cranberries.
And that I think is less mature than actually having a job.
I just say, all I'm saying is being a bartender
doesn't disqualify you from being mature for your age.
I feel like we'll know episode one pretty quickly what his, they could have asked him, do you feel like you're being mature for your age? I feel like we'll know episode one pretty quickly what his,
they could have asked him, do you feel like you're emotionally mature? Or he is a self-proclaimed
emotionally mature guy, which always stresses me out when they're like, no, no, no. But I'm,
I'm, I'm way wise, like way wiser above my years or that's the expression. That's how you say that.
I think anyone who is like describing themselves as emotionally mature beyond their years when they're 23, like I would have probably even,
like I wouldn't have said that when I was 23. A former college athlete, Brandon is no stranger
to putting in the hard work in order to achieve success. He says he's an open book and once he
finds the right woman, he is not afraid to put himself out there in the name of love.
Brandon's perfect match
is thoughtful independent and supportive okay love those descriptors he describes himself as
very adventurous so he hopes to find someone who will say yes to whatever comes their way alongside
him one thing he is definitely ready to say yes to a rose of course ladies the ball is in your court. Oh, gosh. Do they write these?
I can't tell.
I think there's no way these guys are writing all of this.
No way.
But why are they like this?
Brandon is terrified of slugs.
How interesting.
That's something.
He loves to go to the batting cages.
I will say his description, besides the emotionally mature beyond his years, seems pretty normal to me.
At first thing, his picture, the outfit, is scaring me a little bit, but he could be all right.
I think he'd be all right.
I think he might surprise people for actually being mature for his age.
All right, last one.
Chris, 30, mentality coach, Redondo Beach.
It's giving Carl immediately. Yep. Yep, yepl immediately yep yep yep yep chris is an
extreme coach yes chris is an extremely driven person and has accomplished a lot in his life
professionally he knows what his goals are and exactly what he needs to do to accomplish them
but when it comes to love the journey is just beginning chris is looking for someone ambitious
compassionate and secure.
She should support Chris as he chases his goals,
but also work hard to accomplish the goals she has for herself.
He needs a woman who will love him
for the hard worker he is
and not complain as the two of them
work together toward greatness.
Chris is like, shut the fuck up.
I want to compare the last two.
And I do think that someone at ABC or Warner Brothers is making these sound like nice.
But I think they are taking the words that these men have written down.
And I want to point out a couple of different things I've noticed between Brandon, our emotionally mature bartender, and Chris, our 30-year-old mentality coach.
bartender and chris our 30 year old mentality coach uh brandon's perfect match is thoughtful independent and supportive he describes himself as himself as very adventurous so he hopes to
find someone who will say yes to whatever comes their way alongside him hopes chris on the other
hand chris is looking for someone ambitious compassion insecure she should support chris on the other hand chris is looking for someone ambitious compassion insecure she should
support chris as he chases his goals also she has to work hard to accomplish the goals that
she has for herself please read chris's fun facts you're gonna die but you get what i know but i
will but you know what i'm saying like i think that Brandon wrote I hope that she has this and I think
Chris actually wrote
the girl I end up with
should and needs to
and needs to and I think
there's a huge distinction between
like how these two
treat women I'm gonna take back my
Brandon comments
we could be wrong could be
right we'll find out.
I love it when they say
all this really important stuff.
Really important about the journey
and love and companionship.
And then it's like,
Chris loves mangoes.
Loves.
Loves.
In all caps.
All caps.
Read the next two.
Read the next two.
Chris has written two books
and says he is his own favorite author.
I fucking love him.
Nick, are you your own favorite author?
No. I can't even believe I wrote a book uh neither can we when asked what chris fears in life he says quote
i don't choose fear fucking hate this guy that really that i mean i love him he's gonna be great
for tv i love this it's like snakes sharks anything sir just don't he doesn't choose it i just don't fear
choose it he's gonna be preaching to all the guys they're gonna hate him there's just no way he's
not the villain yeah he's giving me um he's giving me i'm getting scared i don't have to do is gas
him up and tell him how great he is like i think the other guys could really use some advice right
now i need to know what the difference between a mentality and like a life coach is because i think we got like two more
life coaches in here i need them to fight about it amongst each other i'm sure that we're given
the opportunity well there's our little tease all right well i hope you enjoyed this tease and fear
not we'll be back next week uh to talk more snark about all these men.
We have 30 some more to go.
Elise will be with us, guiding you the rest
of the way. Until then, we'll see you tomorrow
with Adrena Petridge.
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