The Viall Files - E574 Going Deeper with Barbara Corcoran Plus Roasting Entitled Reality TV “Stars”

Episode Date: April 27, 2023

Welcome back to The Viall Files: Going Deeper Edition! Today we are joined by Barbara Corcoran to talk business, love, and pop culture. What were the defining moments of her career, what does she think about modern dating and hook-up culture, and how about flirting with Nick? We then have a “Sweating the Wedding” bridesmaid who has been plagued by Venmo requests from a very bougie Maid of Honor… the bachelorette trip is quickly approaching, and she’s worried about the potential budget and charges coming her way.  “Pettiness, me? Of course!”  Start your 7 Day Free Trial of Viall Files + here: https://viallfiles.supportingcast.fm/  Please make sure to subscribe so you don’t miss an episode and as always send in your relationship questions to [e-mail] to be a part of our Monday episodes. Join us for our new LIVE show on Thursdays at 9PM ET/6PM PT on Amp, available in the Apple app store. Android User? Listen here: https://www.onamp.com/  To Order Nick’s Book Go To: http://www.viallfiles.com  If you would like to get some texting advice on Office Hours send an email to [e-mail] with “Texting Office Hours” in the subject line! To advertise on the show, contact [e-mail] or visit https://www.advertisecast.com/TheViallFiles  THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSORS: Alo Moves -  For a limited time, Alo Moves is offering our listeners a free 30-day trial PLUS – get this - 50% off an annual membership. But you can only get it by going to https://www.alomoves.com and use code NICKVIALL in all caps.  BetterHelp - Discover your potential with BetterHelp. Visit https://www.BetterHelp.com/VIALL today to get 10% off your first month. Episode Socials: @viallfiles @nickviall @barbaracorcoran @nnataliejjoy @alison.vandam @liffordthebigreddog @dereklanerussell

What's going on everybody welcome back to another exciting episode of the vile files going deeper edition i'm your host nick joined by the household of ali amanda and derek and returning our special correspondent natalie joy here for just a nice little chat before we get to our special special guest the one the only truly one and only she is a one of a kind barbara corcoran is with us today for our episode she is a hoot and a half a treat a real delight i love her absolute delight she posted a picture of you on her story and tagged me and said your man is very charming and i said pause off bitch watch your back natalie yeah literally barbara's coming from us

well we have a lot to get into before we get to Barbara. I know we talked about the Love is Blind lawsuit. I shared my thoughts. I have so many more thoughts now because since then, we've been sent a bunch of stuff from the lovely audience. You guys are just great researchers, honestly. We really appreciate you i'm tired of the entitled reality tv stars that are out there truly truly i love how amanda is like advocating she she's the she's the heart and soul of it anyway is it but anyways Anyway, is that? But anyways. Share your perspective. No, the entitled talentless reality TV stars that now are.

It was I was made aware that I think it's part of the same frivolous lawsuit that's out there. But it's my list might be a little harsh. They could have a talent. What? They could be talented. My take is that when it comes to these like Love is Blind or The Bachelor, it requires no talent. Oh, to be on the show.

Oh, right. Yeah. From an entertainment, they are, for the most part, talentless people when it comes to entertainment. They might have a hidden talent of some kind. They might discover a talent. They might work on a craft or a talent after the show, but it requires no talent to be on the show. It simply requires your willingness to be a guinea pig and your desire to be famous. That's all it takes.

And you are speaking from? Yeah, from personal experience. Yeah. I went on for the experience. And in the back of my mind, I would not have gone on if I didn't think, what might come of this? I feel like that's the myth of my mind, I would not have gone on if I didn't think, what might come of this? I feel like that's the myth of paying your dues though,

like that people talk a lot about how in the industry, like when there's, like specifically in the entertainment industry, like I feel like something people talk about all the time is like,

oh, people treat their assistants really badly and then the assistants become the agents and then those agents treat their assistant and it becomes this like cycle. so i i guess a job though this isn't a job even though even though some of these people want it to be thought of as a job just i guess i'm just like just because other people had to endure things like why are we against just like

improving quality of life for everyone like why i agree need to be no living, why does it need to be no living wage? Why does it need to be like no food? Because literally thousands, tens of thousands of people would be so grateful to be in the position that people like Nick Thompson would be in, who was gifted three hundred and thirty three thousand Instagram followers, which is a essentially a lottery ticket worth tens of hundreds of thousands of dollars if he tried to monetize it, which he has. I just think people are so unaware of the special treatment that people like myself and all other people who go on the show and the access they are given and the opportunities these they are given. I mean, I remember seeing the cast of Love is Blind season two, all the Chicago people at Coachella.

Coachella tickets cost, what, a lot? A lot. VIP Coachella tickets are over a grand, and they don't pay for it. And then they get to go to all these parties, and they get to meet all these people, and they get to do these sponsored posts. They get a bunch of free shit. And they get all this free stuff. It is insane the opportunities that these people and they get to do these sponsored posts they get a bunch of free shit they get all this free stuff it is insane the opportunities that these people get they get access to meet

some of the coolest people in the world and so many people would love to be in their position and willing to be in their position so if they don't want all this amazing opportunities they just shouldn't have done it and they all sign a contract that essentially i don't want all this amazing opportunities they just shouldn't have done it and they all sign a contract that essentially i don't know what the love is blind contract it looks like but i'm assuming it's close to the bachelor contract which is like a really thick packet that essentially on every page says you're a guinea pig if we want to we can destroy your life and everyone who signs that contract goes, hmm, but can I be famous? Do you think I can be famous?

Is there a chance I can be famous? In their head, it's just like, they all sign it because deep down, they think to themselves, it's not gonna be me. I'll behave myself. And it's worth it. It's worth the opportunities.

I see all the people who went before me, who get to do all these crazy cool things. This is a literal once in a lifetime opportunity to do something I would never otherwise have an opportunity to do because I don't have talent. I don't have any agents or managers banging on my door, signing me. And I don't have on my door signing me and I don't have advertising agencies banging on my door offering me five figure or six figure deals by simply just posting something on their social media platforms. And even if they don't get offered deals, 333,000 Instagram followers. Imagine all the small business owners out there who spent their entire life thinking about a business idea and it's been their dream and they saved and they sweat to save

up and then they had to spend thousands of dollars on marketing and have it go nowhere. He has 333,000 Instagram followers is a TV network. It's like a channel. It's incredible power. It's a lottery ticket. And the entitlement of these people is just beside me. And I found out that they started a page, essentially like a donation page.

It's called You Can. I'm not going to give the website because it's absolute bullshit. Wait, who started this? i think it was nick uh i think it was nick thompson and there's some germy guy who was also on season two love is blind he was on it for like three days but he talked about how like he was uh deprived of food and water oh can i go on to that deprived of food or water crap that they're out there slinging first of all like you have we watched love is blind right in these like in the pod the pods section of the of the season right when they're in the pods for i don't know what is it two or three weeks or something they're in these little pods there's a little kitchen in there yeah 10 days i've talked with many cast members

they stock it with food i mean bliss was making cookies bliss was making cookies they had flour when i was in the bachelor mansion when you're in the mansion they're every day they like may have you make a grocery list and they will bring you whatever the fuck you want and i'm sure there were times where someone's like can i get some water and they're like hey we're busy now we can't bring you water or whatever the fuck that to act like they were deprived of the proper nutrients in food, it's just ridiculous to me that it's a bunch of crap. It just is. It's just a bunch. It's like when Kelly Flanagan, when she was just like, oh, they basically locked me in a room or something. No, they didn't. They probably had an ITM and then she was like, I want to go see Peter. And they were probably like,

oh, Peter's busy right now and you can't go see him. And then that turned into, they refused to let me see Peter and shit know and shit like that they are making a tv show it is not an all-inclusive resort it's not an all-you-can-eat buffet where i where i honestly think some of these people think it's like some sort of magical vacation they get to go on and at the moment where they're like hey we're busy're busy right now, or we can't do this. And I'm not, again, I'm not saying it's not psychological warfare. I'm not saying it's a very difficult experience. They literally tell you,

the show says it's a science experiment. It's an experiment. And if they don't want to be guinea pigs, don't show up. There's a million other want to be guinea pigs out there. You know, I was a want to be guinea pigs out there. I was a wannabe guinea pig. So question, are people believing? I don't know. We don't know. I mean, I'm sure

I think it's on both sides. I mean, people were spot... We posted a clip of Tuesday's episode. It seemed like a lot of people agreed with me and there are a lot of people who disagree with me. And certainly there's these kind of fan podcasts out there who like make a they make a living out of finding the uh basically like the washed up reality tv stars who again you know they're in the limelight they have all the opportunities then the limelight goes away because they've done nothing with the platform that was gifted to them they didn't find their niche they weren't able to keep it going. And then another season or two come out and they become less and less relevant. They become forgotten. And listen, it's tough. It's definitely hard on the psyche. It's hard on the psyche to get thrusted into stardom and get all this attention and have it just as quickly go away. I get it,

but it's still an incredible opportunity. I would be willing to bet if this lawsuit goes forward, I'd be like, I know, for example, Bachelor didn't do an amazing job in the past, but I do know as of recently as a few years, they have this kind of like, I don't know what they call it, but it's basically like, I'm pretty sure I could, I'm six, seven years removed and I could call them up and be like, I'm struggling with my mental health. I need some therapy and they would probably pay for it. I certainly know that the people who come off the show in like the years that follow have access to therapy and i'd be willing to bet the people on love is blind have had their therapy paid for them um if they struggle for any mental health problems do you think that's available to

all contestants i don't on the bachelor oh yeah yeah yeah that's yeah i don't think it's just like final three get like everyone and again like i'm not like i i do think these shows could always do better when it comes to protecting the mental health of the cast following and do a better job of preparing them for what's to come i'm not saying that these production companies can't do better. That's not what I'm saying. This website literally opens up with asking for a donation. You have former reality TV stars who were gifted 333,000 Instagram followers asking fans for money. We need your help. It's time to support the cast instead of the companies who exploit them donate now it's just like no you were these companies had an amazing idea or whatever and

it's like again if you don't want to do it you don't have to there is literally nothing special about you when it comes to why you're on the show other than your willingness to show up and be recorded and be vulnerable and do something as insane as get married in a few weeks. No one made you do it. No one made me show up multiple times on The Bachelor. And a lot of people thought I was insane. And you could argue I was. I made some huge risks. And it wasn't always pretty. It sucked a lot. and it's not to say that i don't have my frustrations and complaints it doesn't say not to say i never felt manipulated but night one of the bachelor i showed up and then you know there was alcohol there and i had a couple drinks you know and then after two like pretty deep whiskeys i thought well this is gonna be a long night i

should probably stop drinking and then i started started having coffee. And then I thought to myself, well, I'm feeling a little jittery. That's a lot of caffeine because it got really cold. And then I thought, well, no, I'm going to stop drinking that. I just drank hot water. I was an adult who made a choice and I listened to my body and I like, no, people act like they show up to these things and they are incapable of making decisions for themselves. As if like these evil producers are like manipulating them so they're incapable of saying, no, I don't know. Thanks. I'm good. I don't I don't want that alcohol.

And also watch Love is Blind. When they're in the pods. How many drunk people do we see? I don't remember drunk scenes. Wait. Also, now that you bring that up in the pods, they have those like carts stacked of food. They like will be, it'll be like. They're like eating dinner in the pods.

Yeah, it'll be like wing night or they'll like make dinner together in the pods. Yeah, and how many drunk moments do you remember in the pods? There's usually always like one drunk episode in Love is Blind. It's always like that kind of like at the pool party or that bonfire on season two yeah it's a party and they're drinking like people get drunk at parties just to kind of dig into this because i think the thing is is that food and water seems to be like one of the issues that people are punching like and that's all coming from nick saying how they were deprived of food and water do you think this is a production issue or do you think this is part of the experiment?

Let's say food and water is available, but like, let's a little harder to get. Do you think that's a byproduct of production or do you think that might be something that falls under the experiment? Well, first I just think it's bullshit. I think in reality, there might've been a time where they had a request for the food that they wanted and they weren't given what exactly what they wanted when they wanted. That's what I think it came down to. I think they might have had to wait an hour for the water they asked for because, I don't know, everyone was busy or something like that because they weren't the priority.

I do not think, whether it's The Bachelor or Love is Blind, that there's discussions going on being like, we're going to not give them water or we're not going to give them food. To make them go crazy. We were always fed well on The Bachelor. Like, more than enough. But isn't it fair to say then, well, if it's a lawsuit, then yeah, prove that you were deprived of food and water. I mean, listen, if they want to be, sure,

if they want to do that, I mean, they're not going to win. They're going to get crushed. But now, they've literally created a website asking fans for money. That's insane. They get to go to Lollapalooza and Coachella for free. They get to make these ridiculous opportunities that they get as a result of their willingness to expose themselves to this type of crazy atmosphere.

And it's very upfront. And you read these contracts, no lawyer would tell a client to sign this. It's not a favorable contract. Now I'm in a position where if I get presented a contract, I'll have my lawyer redline it and be like, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope. And the idea is on the assumption that they really want to work with me, that I'm providing something to them. And then the company who wants to hire me can say, well, you know, you're not really worth it. We're to go with someone else or they can meet my demands. And this particular situation, whether it's The Bachelor or Love is Blind, if you want to red line anything, they'll be like, no, next.

We'll just get someone else. There's such a demand. Yeah. And I so agree that there are tradeoffs to reality TV. Like, I completely agree that, like, there are elements of like regular human decency that are tradeoffs to reality TV. I completely agree that there are elements of regular human decency that are not applicable to reality TV. You will have maybe your parents listen to you talk about intimacy in your sex life. You will have people digging through all of your shit, finding any tweet that you posted

in 2014. I completely agree that there are some real tradeoffs. There's a price that you pay for this kind of exposure. It is a big opportunity and people pay with their like their themselves like they pay with access to themselves but i think there's such a big difference between that and like food water wages and i mean again they're not wages they're not employees also it fits in very well with other things happening in the entertainment industry that's not just reality tv because i remember senior year of college going through several rounds of auditions. I was going to work on a cruise ship. I was going to be a performer on like Norwegian. And it was very

similar in that when they're in the pods, it's like, here's your weekly stipend because we have a trailer for you and room and board is covered. Same with a cruise ship. Like we had a weekly stipend. And to be clear, a stipend is not a salary or a paycheck. It is it's a per diem. But it was like very well understood that because we're taking care of room and board, here is your weekly whatever. Here's your contract is going to be for this amount of time. It came with certain stipulations, as most cruise ships do, of like, you'll stay on board during these times and here are other responsibilities we're going to throw at you. But it wasn't a standard hourly pay or a salary. But there were so many people vying for

it that it was kind of like, wow, I hope I get this Norwegian contract, whatever it says. But what if we take it away from like what people are saying they demand and what production companies are just like giving? What do you mean? Why do they? I think when we're talking about the ethics of this, like this isn't a business negotiation. This is like a philosophical conversation about like what's fair. And why is a production company? Do you want to do the max you can get away with?

OK, sure. Maybe you can get away with giving like these people insane conditions, paying them a very minimum amount. That's like a per diem, not any kind of salary. You can get away with like limited food and water access. Like I get this limited food and water access, I think is totally bullshit. Marshall was here on this couch a couple of weeks ago talking about the lobster he was eating.

But the whole point is that the structure of reality TV and part of this they do sign up for is that one party holds all the power. The production company holds all the power. So it's like for the people who don't make it to the engagement round or who go home, the nobodies who have zero platform, obviously they're not going to show footage of them not having access to these things. So it's about like a bunch of people coming together and like having a voice and even being able to like partake in this conversation that like usually they just get muscled out of because like you said, you have to sign a deal with the devil in the form of a contract to even get on

these shows. But yeah, but you don't have to sign the deal with the devil. They want to sign with the deal with the devil. They're begging to sign the deal with the devil. want to sign with the deal with the devil they're begging to sign the deal with the devil yeah it's like i mean we have a friend who had like a couple interviews with big brother and he was like i was like are you gonna do it there's a prize at the end of big brother like you don't get paid to go on the show there is no stipend there is no per diem it's just like you go And he said it's three months long. And he was like, I like I have to work. I can't like be gone for three months.

And like all of these people can make that decision of like, like, is this risk? Is it, is it worth it? Like, do I want to not work? And he's probably not going to go.

And they'll find someone else. But I also think that damages. The big brother will live on. I would argue that it actually damages like the quality of reality TV. Cause like the vast majority of people aren't in a position to take like time big chunks of time off from work and so we're completely eliminating those people from the pool of people who could even be like represented invisible and people watch reality tv doing just because who are we missing out on anybody who can't take that kind of time off from work like like do we literally live in a world right now from work like that's a choice for everybody like do we

literally live in a world right now where we are that's this title other than going deeper with barbara corcoran is going to be entitled reality tv stars like why are we so entitled now to expect that we deserve these things this insane opportunity that if you're willing to go in and subject yourself to kind of a psychological experiment and be pushed, you have your emotions and your mental's pushed to the limit and they're very upfront about that. For the opportunity to be on TV, get an insane following,

and then for a finite period of time, most likely, unless you are smart enough or clever enough to take it and run with it and build it into something else, why are you entitled to that? He is sitting on a pot of gold, literally, with his 333,000 followers and has the ability to come up with this bullshit and go on these other podcasts and start this nonprofit. He's literally asking fans to donate money. He's not offering- himself. Like what? I guess for for for future reality, for consultations, for future reality TV stars or whatever. The donation page says, don't you think it's time to help the cast?

If everyone who watched reality TV donated just one month of what they pay streaming services, we could solve this issue forever. Reality TV. What issue? I mean, the the the the what's the word i'm looking the audacity there's so many problems going on in this world and these motherfuckers want you to to like solve this what world problem of the the poor reality tv star who got to go on tv and become famous for no fucking reason be gifted in instagram followers but let's solve this problem let's truly solve this insane problem because once we solve this problem the world will be a better fucking place jesus fucking christ like no problem yeah no give us your 14.99 because you know what we don't have trees to save no we have poor reality tv

stars who aren't smart enough to monetize their instagram i love when nick pops off on a topic like jesus fucking christ it's like if i i personally will not be donating unless i learn things that make me feel really you're fired i'm kidding but it's just like that does not resonate with me personally like but everyone has the right to choose which causes resonate with them. Sure, yeah. And so I just like the final- Everyone has a right to do whatever the fuck they want.

It's a free fucking country. I just think this is pathetic. And I think these people are incredibly entitled and they are weaponizing words like mental health and things like that. People who willingly subjected themselves to these types of environments with the hopes that they would be given this incredible opportunity. And while I can't prove it, I am confident that if things played out different for these people, if they were given more and more opportunities, they

wouldn't be doing shit like this. If they were getting given more jobs by Netflix and shit like that, they wouldn't be making these pages. It's only because now, and it's the same thing. The star dims on these people. They go from, again, this like six months window of getting like kind of like A to B list celebrity access and then that trickles down and then eventually they're just kind of nobodies. And yeah, again, that can suck on your psyche,

but no one made you do that. You wanted that. You wanted that. You wanted that attention. And what we're here, are we supposed to feel bad for the person who was narcissistic enough? And I include myself in this to like think, you know what? I'm special. I should be famous for no fucking reason other than I'm willing to pour my heart out on TV and have people judge me for it. I totally. And I think that's a really valid point. And especially when it comes to drinking, like I would say that there's a really clear

distinction between like putting people in an environment where, you know, they're stressed, like it's a reality TV show. They might be getting married soon and having an open bar. Like, I'm not saying that's not fair game, but like they're not having access to water thing. Is it like I just think there's two different conversations here. And I totally mean there was no access to water and then we can have a discussion well that's what they're trying to i feel like that's why they're suing but they can't even be heard because everyone's like oh

the real entitled reality tv stars there's literally water in the pods yeah they have the gold fucking cups the whole season is people holding gold cups but what if they're not but they're not the producers aren't pouring rose into their cups yeah they're like what do you want to drink and they're like water or rose my kind of reaction to it is just i feel like if netflix did not give them water that would be a huge legal liability that they would open themselves up to yeah they're not dumb enough to like do something that stupid and to bounce off of, like the stipend is nothing. But the reason it's, in my opinion, with no legal advice, the reason it's a stipend and not a wage, I feel like it would be bad optics to be like, we're firing you because you refuse

to marry your coworker. Exactly. And they're protecting themselves. Or the whole like, are you doing this for money? Are you doing this for love? You know, there's a reason why they're not paid. Because it actually takes away from the integrity of the show give a minimum wage like i'm not saying you need to give them like they're not

employees that's nuts it's not to pay people for their time well like think about their choosing to go think about the bachelor in paradise live thing that i went to i was i paid for that yeah ali it was her time there was no water amusement park and i decided to go should i get paid to go to church is church is everything your attendance to like make hundreds of millions of dollars if i they chose to sign the contract that says we own your likeness i think my point here is that like this is not a negotiation it's companies getting to set whatever standards they want and like they can be and like with the whole thing, like I'm not saying that they were definitely deprived of food and water.

I'm saying we should hear them out because it's really fucked up if they were like. And so my point here is that it's like it's not a negotiation. Like the cast has truly nothing at all. And I'm not saying that they should have a ton of negotiating power. I'm not saying where that negotiation power should fall. I'm not saying that they should have a ton of negotiating power. I'm not saying where that negotiation power should fall. But I do think right now, like they have absolutely no ability to assert their perspectives. And so they are like caught where like that.

True. Every you have all these other like little podcast and micro shows or whatever. Assert their perspective as it relates to like a conversation about production, less of like pop culture. Like there's no means of the like. production less of like pop culture like there's no means of the like there there are an endless amount of podcasts out there with former reality tv stars going on and complaining about how they were mistreated by producers and how they were manipulated or how like all this terrible shit happened and it all comes out after the fact so they clearly have they they have nick has instagram followers to pop off and talk

about whatever the fuck he wants whenever he wants to fucking talk about it that's insane access that isn't that's an did you realize how much of a gift that is to have that channel i am not saying that like reality tv stars should have like a list of demands that they get met like i just think there should be like so i drew we were joking about a union, but the more I think about it, like they should have some kind of like, because if fucked up shit was going on, they would have no way of communicating it. If fucked up shit is actually going on, they could sue and they'll win. But we're, but they're having a lawsuit and we're already like.

I mean, sharing my opinion, but they're, they're going to lose. It's, they're going to get crushed because they have no case. What this is, is these guys making a public spectacle and leveraging the salacious... What was that fucking show? It was basically about The Bachelor, Unreal. Yeah. And people love that. There's a whole community of reality TV fans that just...

They watch this shit to hear about how fucked up the behind the scenes treatment is they fucking love it you know it sells and they're using that to create a basically a business for themselves and ask fans for their money to end this terrible problem of oppressing reality tv stars who no longer can like make the amount of money and get the fame that they want from their platform. It says reality TV cast members have put their lives out there for you. Their lives on the line. Don't you think it's time to give back?

Oh, God. Oh, my God. Again, I will not be donating to this specific cause. I completely hear the argument. There's plenty more things going on in the world. I just respect the fact that they are allowed to have a lawsuit without being immediately dismissed yeah no i know you went on a show i didn't so like you i know you have knowledge that i am not privy to so maybe there's certain things like statements ways they phrase things about producers that like i i'm not going to interpret it the way you are

because like you have i think there's a more intimate there's a place in this country in this world for legal action and lawsuits, because sometimes people are, you know, are truly wronged and they, they aren't paid money they're owed and things like that. Or, you know, again, they're, you know, they're real victims, but when people willingly sign up for things, in addition to getting these incredible light once in a lifetime opportunities that so many people would be so incredibly grateful to have. It literally can change people's lives. And it's not everyone else's fault that they rode a wave or didn't bunker down and think to myself and have the foresight to say, this isn't going to last forever. So I'm going to take this incredible platform and think of a way

to use it and monetize and try different things. Try and fail and figure it out. Like some people have. You know who else is trying out new things? Potentially Glenn Powell and Sidney Sweeney. That is crazy. I texted Nick and Allie yesterday and I was like, I need y'all to talk about this because this is crazy. For people who are not familiar, Glenn Powell and Sidney Sweeney shot a movie together. It was a rom-com.

They were in Australia for most of it. And they were posting like a bunch of photos where they looked like they had great chemistry, happy co-stars, having a grand old time. The reason that this is becoming such a big story right now is because Gigi Paris, Glenn Powell's girlfriend, unfollowed Sydney on Instagram. And then there's been rumors of a breakup between them. Yes. People are speculating.

We should have Wells Adams and Sarah Hyland on. They spent New Year's Eve with Glenn and Gigi. Well, supposedly Sydney is engaged. Yeah, but she hasn't been wearing the ring. Uh-oh. But she's been like with that guy for like five, four years. And then he has been wearing the ring. Uh-oh. But she's been with that guy for five, four years, and then he has been dating Gigi for five years.

And wasn't Sidney Sweeney quoted as saying recently after she got engaged to this guy that she doesn't want to date other actors and people in the industry? Yes, correct. I mean, listen, whatever. We say things and then we change our mind. That's fine.

But my question to you, do we think this is a... What's that? Mr. and Mrs to you do we think this is a um what what's what's mr and mrs smith with like there's that but uh what uh like a pr move no the the lady gaga and bradley cooper yeah uh no no there's also the jessica chastain and the um the guy she was with in a marriage oh yeah yeah where she's like on the red carpet and he like kisses her arm. And everyone's like, he's married. Is he? I think he's married or engaged.

What? Oh. Well, everyone like, that like sold the hell out of their show because it was like the chemistry, like it's got to be so good because that red carpet scene

is so hot. That's what I'm saying. So is this a Star's Born situation where they just lean into it for the chemistry? I mean, because like we're talking about this i don't even know the title of the movie that they're making i don't either but

no he's married the guy who kissed her on the red carpet he's married he has been since 2017 interesting okay well that definitely changes my perspective on this because i think like if you look at both of their social medias it's like them two together in every photo. Like at the zoo, the video of him dipping her is wild. Oh, my God. And like if you hear the audio to it, it's even worse. And then he like, she calls him Top Gun. She has little pet names for him already.

And he goes, I love when she calls me that. Like, first of all, if you are filming a movie with Sidney Sweeney, I'm already pissed. Right? Obviously. As I should be. Like, you're going to fall movie with Sidney Sweeney, I'm already pissed. Right? Obviously. As I should be. You're going to fall in love. I mean, no, babe. Well, I mean, no offense to Sidney Sweeney, but she got nothing on you.

Okay, per. Anyways, but I think that was like immediately a little nerve wracking for sure. Totally. Right? Like I was nervous to watch Euphoria with Nick because there's so many topless scenes of Sidney Sweeney. Like sex symbol. Beautiful. Stunning. I love her. But like, cover your eyes. You know, where do you draw the line? Right. Because like so you choose to date an actor and you choose to date a heartthrob actor.

So the assumption is right there, they're going to be cast in a movies where they're going to be like the leading man. And they're in the whole like, could you date an actor, an actress? You know know because kissing someone or maybe a sex scene would be part of their job and let's say you say you know what i respect the craft right okay i i can do this but where do you draw the line between like making the movie and then promoting the movie but then there's also like in between shots where they're not filming their cameras aren't rolling and And there's paparazzi, obviously everywhere in Australia,

following them, shooting this. And they're so lovey dovey. They're like holding each other, hugging each other in between takes. Yeah. And it's like, you,

yeah, go shoot this movie with Sydney Sweeney. But like now we're, even when cameras aren't rolling. He definitely did not Aston Kutcher it. And the way they were looking at each other at cinema con, like it was very intimate. now we're even when cameras aren't rolling he definitely did not ask and cutcher it and the way they were looking at each other at cinema con like it was very intimate and it makes me think like is there a certain level of chemistry that you just can't fake like if they are trying to

simulate chemistry as actors do you think there's just a certain point of crossover where it's like once you reach this level of like validity with chemistry it just like becomes it permeates into like well beyond the camera yeah well like they they there's you know and and how their chem tests they call them chem tests you know so if you're auditioning for a role and let's say you you nail the audition like the final step before they like really move forward let's say they're like hey nally and i don't know each other we're two actors is going for this pilot rom-com and find that we think Natalie Joy and Nick Viall are our two leads, but let's see if they actually have chemistry.

Let's bring them in, have them do a couple scenes, couple readings to see if we can believe it. So acting or not, they are literally looking for organic, authentic, just natural chemistry that would otherwise kind of just happen in the real world. So like, yeah, it's real chemistry. The question is, you know, I'm in a relationship with Natalie, you know, she's in a relationship with me. If she wanted to, or if I want to, I'm sure there's people I could go out and find chemistry with, you know what I'm saying? Like, just because you're

in a relationship and you choose to be, and when we talk about this on the show all the time, you choose to be in a relationship, not because like you're destined to because like you have chemistry with no one else no you're like i want to prioritize this chemistry and i don't want to seek out chemistry in other places and so it's like the question is as actors as performers like where do you draw the line between like doing what you have to do to get the job done versus like an emotional affair emotional affair and then people like i gotta baby gotta promote the movie. But also, Gigi has been posting stuff on her social media. Like when the video of him dipping her went viral, she posted respect by Ruth Franklin on her Instagram story.

Ooh. Yeah. A little R-E-S-P-E-C-T. Like she's not getting the respect? Yeah. I don't know. Read into it how you want. We gotta get Gigi on the show.

We sure do. I don't think she's going to. I don't think she would talk about this. But maybe she'll surprise me. I don't know read into it on the show i don't think she's i don't think she would talk about this but maybe maybe she'll surprise me i don't know i don't think she will because if she breaks up with glenn i think she'll move on to brad pitt or like someone else and no one wants to date someone who went on a podcast and like talked about and talked about yeah i think she's smart enough to that's a good point not do that do we we think if they, let's say Sydney and Glenn end up dating, do we think that confirms that there was some kind of cheating or shadiness going on, seeing how they're treating one another now?

My question to y'all is, and the answer probably, but my question is, you know, like when Mr. and Mrs. Smith came out. It was a long time ago. but I feel like times have changed, you know, with dating and accountability and infidelity and things like that. I feel like will this sell or will this end up being a bad look for them? Are we are we having different expectations of celebrities now? having different expectations of celebrities now i think that people like media outlets like people and us weekly and whoever are really trying to sell it as like this movie is going to be really good whatever and then i think tiktok is like this is fucking sketchy like this shouldn't be happening and so it's like which one do you fall yeah because like when mr and mrs smith came out

like you didn't have TikTok or even Instagram to like have fans control the narrative as opposed to like, to your point, have the E! News and the People magazines and the Us Weeklys of it all who have relationships with publicists and these actors to like, yeah, just spin it the way they want.

And it's kind of fascinating if, you know, the Sidney Sweene's and Mavericks of the world. He does not look like a Glenn. Can I just say? He's a nice, I've met him a few times. Super nice guy. Yeah.

Sidney's giving Cassie. Yes. She's giving Euphoria Cassie. Yeah, she is. And I have never, ever been happier. Allie, what do you think about the budding potential relationship? Oh God, I don't even know I mean I just feel like their chemistry and their body language is so

Like them on the red carpet doing a little TikTok interview She's like holding the mic and like staring lovingly into his eyes And I'm like I have seen plenty of red carpet interviews Where you are just both facing the interviewer Ashton Kutcher and Reese Witherspoon We saw it And you could have You don't have to Ashton Kutcher and Reese Witherspoon. Yeah. We saw it. Yeah. And you could have, you don't have to Ashton Kutcher it where you look. There's a happy medium.

You look awkward. Yeah. There's a happy medium of like, what a wonderful person. A great time. What a talent. She's been a pleasure to work with. Like, I've met her fiance. What a great guy.

Like, you know, it's just, you know, I have so much respect for her. She is the greatest person in the world or whatever. And she could say the same thing about him. They are coming to these interviews in red carpets looking like they just got done fucking and they can't wait to fuck again. Correct. I do look like that's a handsome couple right there. I do feel like I saw and it was recently, I guess, before all this broke that Gigi did. It was like a just Jared Instagram post of Gigi landing in Australia.

And it was like them leaving the airport together. He wasn't holding any of her bags. Which, like, Nick is such a bag holder, which I love about him. It was like, I posted an Instagram story of us leaving the beach, which was partially a joke. Because some people took it very wrong. But Nick had the... Did you get shit for that? Oh, yeah.

They were like, oh, come on, carry one thing. You can. Women can carry stuff too. Natalie can carry plenty. She's a little pokey and I would rather just like- Get going.

Be my toxic masculine self and be like, I can carry all the bags. It's his twit. He had the cooler. He had the bag of towels and sunscreen and the umbrella on his back. I did it for 12 chairs on each arm.

I did it for me, not for her. He was actually holding Natalie as well. She was not walking. But, and she was, they were leaving the airport. And I think that either was the last straw, like a breakup, or it was like, she saw how things were in person. Like, I gotta get out of here like and you know how those conversations go right she was probably like babe i'm just like she voiced the complaint and he was like it's

nothing it's just work you know like i like you know i hate that you do this like why you he probably gaslit the shit out of her and it was told her you know damn i hate that i'm using that word more like throwing stuff on glenn you know what internet hate that I'm using that word more and more. We're like throwing stuff on Glenn now. You know what, internet, you won. You won. Gaslighting is no longer a verb to use to like describe abuse. It's just basically convincing your partner that they're a little. Their reality is invalid. Their reality is a little off and, you know, whatever.

You won. I submit. This has been, we could go on and on. I think this is our best intro of all time. I love this energy. We have so much more. We have so much we could have got into. There's a surgery about a dick enlargement.

There's all these other pop culture topics we haven't talked about. Speculation about who might replace Nick and Vanessa Lachey if they are in fact leaving. Oh, yeah. Bed Bath & Beyond is bankrupt. Giselle is thriving. And Aubrey Plaza did a very controversial milk commercial. All the things we're going to talk about on this week's episode of Pop Extra, which is available behind Vile Files

Plus. Also, don't forget that we have another episode of an update special behind Vile Files Classic. It's free for everyone. Don't worry. And if you love these updates, we have two more updates every month behind Vile Files Plus, and it's free to sign up. It's literally free. You get a seven-day free trial. Just go to VileFiles.com. It's free to sign up. It's literally free. You can get a seven-day free trial.

Just go to vilefiles.com. It's a couple clicks away. You can listen to the podcast. You can listen to those episodes the same way you listen to Vile Files Classic, right, or Connick Classic? Nick's not wearing Converse. I'm not wearing Converse today. Wow, I really thought that sentence

was going to get a distraction. What did you think I was going to say? Condoms. Condoms. Well, that either. I'm also not wearing condoms. Next week, oh, another wild, wild week. We have Howie Mandel in studio to talk about all things VPR.

We'll see if he's more informed. Jacqueline, Howie's daughter, is with us as well to fill in the gaps because obviously when it comes to Bravo and Vanderpump, Howie, no idea. He's just, he's a vessel. I do think he conducted an excellent interview. Why? Because he got the tea. He got Tom Sandoval to open up.

And at the end of the day, that was his job. It wasn't his job to agree or disagree with him. So job well done, Howie. I think we need to appreciate our hosts a little bit more. But we are excited to talk with Howie. It's going to be a lot of fun. Also, Lala Kent joins us again to pop off and share her. She is as full of... uh but we are excited to talk with howie it's going to be a lot of fun also lala kent joins us again to pop off and share her uh she she is this full of all lala kent is this one big hot

take we love we love a lala and she's back in studio to pop off on the next week's episode of going deeper babe anything you want to pop off and promote oh my god um thanks for being our special correspondent absolutely anytime yeah i feel like it's like a pop culture correspondent like it's like yeah yes there you go a pop culture correspondent natalie joy also one final thing don't forget another episode of better date than never is live tonight 9 p.m eastern we're talking role play role playing gonna get wild listen if you're bored tonight you have nothing better to do join our show it's live the chats are popping off people are making friends it's wild it's wacky it's fun you won't you won't regret joining we're excited

to see you there oh oh by the way before we get to barb one final thing uh i i forgot to mention and i've i've like a bunch of casts have told me this. After the altar that seems to happen now every season, it's like, for example, women and men tell all, it's like they renew the contract every year. It's not part of the season that you sign up for. Same with after the final altar. When the cast go on after the final altar,

it's a separate contract. They're not obligated to do it so nick and danielle agreed after their horrific experience signed another contract to go on the show again to promote their marriage also by the way like i don't and again i don't know about that fifty thousand dollar uh thing if they leave that that is i will say that that's that's shady if it's true but every season of love is blind someone's left early someone's quit and i'm unaware of any cast member being sued anyway that's all i got let's get to barb

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Visit betterhelp.com slash V-I-A-L-L today to get 10% off your first month. That's BetterHelp, H-E-L-P.com slash V-I-A-L-L, betterhelp.com slash V-I-A-L-L. Barbara, welcome. Thank you, darling. How's your heart? My heart? Yeah. Pretty good. We start all our conversations like that. Really? What do you mean by How's your heart? My heart? Yeah. Pretty good.

We start all our conversations like that. Really? What do you mean by how's my heart? My health heart or my heart breaking or whatever? I mean, really, it's just open to however you want, but your emotional heart, you know? Oh, too bad, because I just came from the heart doctor and I know my physical heart's in great shape. It is. Well, let's celebrate that.

Yeah. However- Low cholesterol. Low cholesterol. I was a little stressed out a couple weeks ago and my chiropractor told me I had high blood pressure. You? You hardly look alive. High blood pressure. I bottle it all inside, Barbara.

You must. My God. I was almost going to take your pulse when I saw you this morning. I look a little dead inside? Yeah, you still do, actually. Okay. Hopefully you can warm me up. Oh, an invitation early in the morning before breakfast. I remember when you interviewed me, I remember it was spicy. I'm glad we can keep- Spicy? I don't remember that. You don't? I remember hitting on you again and again,

and you're not responding. Hardly any spice there. My fiance was in the other room. Yes. And you finally proposed to that young woman. Thank God. You listened to my advice. I did. Thank you. I gave you dating advice, marriage advice. What did you tell me? I told you to marry that girl. I did.

Yeah. Yeah. You weren't even engaged. Come on. We were starting, before we started recording, you said how you hate when people say you look better in person people tell me that all the time you don't know what to do with it i say thank you but i don't really want to punch him out why because it implies that you don't look good on tv yeah you can't win it implies they're like yeah i thought you were unattractive yeah like yikes that's the rest of the sentence they don't say. Yeah, I know. I get that a lot, too. You do?

Well, you do look better in person. Honestly. Thank you. And I'm sure people tell you that. Now, what are you going to say to that? I just say the same thing. Thank you. Just like, thanks, I guess.

Yep. Yeah. What's new? What's new? Let's see. I feel like a lot. I feel like you're out there. You're crushing TikTok.

I'm out there. But I'm so much in the future of what I'm going gonna do next and i really don't know how to answer what's to do it's already all history you know like what i do yes say i don't know what are you doing two weeks from now two weeks from now i'm going on another vacation i'm going on a bike trip here in la for five days and then i'm going on another vacation europe yeah what's a like what's a bike you get on a bike and you ride the hills you know like a motorcycle or bicycle no a bicycle you don't get any exercise have two friends flying in today we go just you and the gals just me and the gals and listen to this we're going on a bike trip orchestrated by a bike company and it's a wine tour so i'm not

quite sure how we're gonna bike so you're gonna get a sauce wine and then get on a bicycle i'm not did you know you can get a dui on a bicycle no i didn't know that you can oh i'll be careful we'll be on public roads i believe you can i'm pretty sure can we google can we confirm that no you definitely i i think it might be it has to be motorized i don't know if it's still you're still operating most people are not aware that you can be arrested for riding a bike while over the legal alcohol limit for driving in fact california vehicle code section 21200.5 vc punishes a defendant for riding a bicycle under the influence of alcohol or drugs careful barbara you know you have to google how many people have been arrested

probably two in 10 years have you ever been pulled over and said, you just pulled over a shark? I know because I don't drive. I get driven. Oh, there you go. Yeah. I just don't like to drive. I hate driving too. What, in LA?

Why would you even want to drive? Ubers are so much cheaper. Easier. You don't have any stress. You just lay back and relax, you know? Yeah. Yeah. But I used to get pulled over a lot when I used to drive in the New York area.

And? Speeding. Speeding. How would you get out of a lot when I used to drive in the New York area. And? Speeding. How would you get out of tickets? Talk my way out of it. How? I used to have a Porsche, first trophy car I bought. And the guy said, pulled me over, said, you're breaking the speed limit. Not by much, 15 or something like that.

And I said, oh, I'm so sorry. I just got it off the block because I heard my roofer brother call it a block that you put your car up. It's like they got to throw in some lingo like that. And I said, I was just testing it out. I'm so sorry, officer, please. And he didn't give me a ticket. He stopped me the next week. I was on the same commute.

And he said, give your roofer brother a hello from me. Swear to God, big guy. I'm like, okay, I'm not going to get out of this one. He nailed me for a lot of money. He gave you the ticket. Oh, yeah. And he hit me for like two or to get out of this one. He nailed me for a lot of money. He gave you the ticket. Oh, yeah. And he hit me for like two or three other little infractions. He was pissed.

Don't blame him. Caught red-handed. That was when I was younger. I'm straight now. Are you? Not really. You follow the rules? I feel like you, as you've gotten older, you follow less rules.

I follow less rules, but I'm more cautious about which ones I break. And I think, is it worth it? And usually the answer is always yes. When I was skiing last summer, I had the ski patrol waiting for me on top of the mountain and they took my badge away that I had bought. And for the season, for the season, this was in Deer Valley, they took it away simply because I was speeding down the mountain. And they said, didn't you see all those ski schools that were at risk? I said, I was going too fast. I didn't see anybody. I was racing anybody who would race me. You're drag racing kind of on skis.

Yeah, kind of. But I swear I never met a man who could outrace me and I had to hold up my own image in my own eyes. So I was killing myself down the mountain, but I won every time. That's all that matters. But I lost my badge. I'm a very good skier, really. I should have been a ski racer for a living. I would have had a lot more fun. Do you have a videotape of Barbara skiing?

Yeah, we do. I would love to see that. We'll send it to you. Thank you. But you better agree with me that I'm phenomenal. Well, I can't. I don't know how. Oh, you're going to think I'm great? I don't think you're phenomenal.

Yeah. You're going to get no notes from me. Yeah. The downside is I've had so many ski injuries. I don't even know why I go back, but it's so exciting. So I, you're like on TikTok a lot these days. Yeah. You've really, you've embraced it.

Is that because you find it entertaining or are you someone who, is it more strategic because you're kind of tapping into kind of the newer platforms? Like what's, why do you, what do you love about TikTok? The main reasons I just love it. You know what it is? It's, you could just have fun. You don't even have to care what people think. And it seems like the more stupid you are, the more people love you. So I feel like I don't have to act at all. Even though I'm not an actress, I always feel like I'm putting a little dog on the show. Not with TikTok, but on the strategy, I've only recently learned that tapping into other people's followings that's why I'm here you thought I wanted to see you I'm using you yes shit I thought you're having fun we're not

besties how how could I become a friend my Yeah. You mean a real friend or just follow me? No, like a real friend. Like what would I have to do? Or do you only have friends? Old friends? Yeah, old friends. Most of my friends are old friends, but I always acquire new friends. And I'd have to figure out what you wanted out of the friendship.

But if you just came for dinner at my house. I'd be fun to just be like, you know, who's a good friend of mine? Yeah. Barbara Corcoran. Oh, just to name drop. Then I'd never'd be honest. It'd be fun to just be like, you know, who's a good friend of mine? Yeah. Barbara Corcoran. Oh, just to name drop. Then I'd never be your friend. But I would like to know. I want to be like a genuine friend.

Oh, you want to be a genuine friend? No, because you know how like Martha Stewart and Snoop Dogg are like really good friends? I hope so. They seem, I'm so jealous of her position. I would love to be Snoop Dogg's best friend. Yeah. But it's like a cool friendship. It's an ironic friendship.

It really is. It's so unusual, but so cool. I couldg's best friend. Yeah. But it's like a cool friendship. It's an ironic friendship. It really is. It's so unusual, but so cool. I could use an ironic friend. I'll be your ironic friend. That's what I'm saying. You got it. Come over for dinner next week when I'm back. Okay.

In New York. In New York. You have to fly to New York. I was just in New York last past weekend. Well, you didn't call me, so you're obviously not a good friend. I was too busy recreating my first date with my fiance. Is that what you were doing there, really? Which was in New York?

Yeah, we met in Brooklyn. Oh, how authentic. Yeah. How pricey. It was. Was it a good restaurant? Well, it was a whole weekend excursion. So we met at a hotel.

Oh, sounds suspicious. What happened then? Oh, yeah, we just had lots of sex. You what? Yeah, that's how we met. You just went and had sex? Well, we had like a dinner first. Yeah.

We met. First date? Yeah. Wow, I wouldn't think that would be smart on her part, giving away the goods so quick. Well, the good is great so she knew i'd come back for more you know that's confidence she doesn't lack any you wouldn't give that same advice to someone else dating right like hopping to bed as fast as you can if you're good

in bed no i mean i i don't tell people what to do with their sex life i just tell people i don't know to just kind of be honest with themselves what they're doing. I think if you are going to hook up with someone on the first date or first couple dates, I think you can complicate a situation and I think you can make too much of that relationship about sex.

Yes. But people do do it and I don't think- And it worked for you. Yeah, it did. And I don't think, I think the reason like a lot of young women seem to think, well, I can't sleep with him on the first date because he won't respect me. So I'll wait to the fourth date. Yeah, it's a little old fashioned.

And that doesn't really mean anything because if a guy is going to judge you or change his mind, three dates isn't going to do anything. Right. You know, I just think that if the sex is great, they'll come back for more. And if it's... Seems logical. If it's average, then unfortunately for the two of you,

they'll be basing too much of what they know about you off the sex because they don't know enough about you to be like, well, the sex is only okay. Well, the world has changed because i had a very different theory when i was dating what was your theory my theory was don't sleep with the guy until he proposes and then he didn't propose so i'd propose but once he said yes i slept with him right away because he had to taste some merchandise there you go and he came back for more why i don't know i don't think i'm very good in bed but he came back for more. Why? I don't know. I don't think I'm very good in bed, but he came back for more.

You don't. I doubt that. Believe me. Believe me. It's not my strong trait. I don't know. This got weird. Come here.

Come here. Have another look. What do you find really sexy about me? I'm not one of those girls, you know? You're a confident person. Yeah, confidence doesn't necessarily mean you know tricks in bed. It means you're willing to try. You're the person who was going down the ski hill too fast and got your badge taken away. I just feel like you'd be down to like, you know. No, I don't know why it's different for me. I'm very confident in business.

I'm confident skiing. I'm confident with my friends. But when it comes to bed, I'm not really very confident at all. I don't think I'm that good at it, honestly. I've never seen any guys with, and there have only been three in my life, but they never said, wow, baby, wow. They said, oh, nice. Oh, come on. No, I made up the nice, but they never said wow. And then once they were married to me, all bets were off.

No more sex. That's it. I got you now. But all seriousness, you've been married for 35 years. Yeah. How do you two keep it spicy? We don't. You don't?

No. I'd be a liar if I said so. You know what we do? I say, what do you want? S or S? And he says, I'll take Scrabble. That's Bill. We play Scrabble.

But you still love each other? Oh, very much so. He's a good guy, and I'm not such a good girl, but he gets a kick out of me. What do you mean you're not such a good girl? That also sounded weird. No, not what you're thinking. No, no, not what you're thinking. No, no,

not what you're thinking. I should have said, I'm not such a good wife. I'm not doting. What's it? What makes a good wife to make a man happy? Whatever he needs. We took that love test a while ago and it came out for him that the most

important things were words of affirmation. That was number one on his list. That's his love language. My love language was, of course, acts of goodness. So my husband never does anything good for me, and I never give that guy a compliment. We're not meant to be. But you're happy.

Well, we tolerate each other, and we know we have it better than most people. You know what I do when I really have had it and think, oh my God, marriage is really, really tough. know we have it better than most people you know what i do when i really have had it and then oh my god marriage is really really tough i look around at all the husbands of my friends and things would i rather be married to them and i come running back no way no way i'm keeping my husband so what makes him better than the rest he's solid he knows who he is if you become my friend you can meet Bill. Everybody

loves Bill more than me. And they all said the same thing about a poor Bill, which really irks me. But they're kind of right because he's solid. He's quiet. He doesn't have to prove anything. And he's got good morals. He never, ever tells a lie. Never shades the truth. Says exactly what he thinks. Exactly what he thinks. How are you going to find many men like that? Not many. I like to think I have some of those characteristics that Bill has. Well, you're a lot younger and better looking than Bill is by now.

But when he was your age, he would outshine you on looks. I've never been attracted to a guy who isn't totally handsome somehow. You're handsome, but you're not Bill's kind of handsome when he was your age. What's Bill's kind of handsome? A knock dead, drag out, good looking guy.

Okay. That turns all the girls' heads. I mean, some of the girls would look at you, no doubt, but you walk into a big room, it wouldn't be like every girl's turning, right?

Bill was that kind of guy. Whoa, everybody's turning. And he was my guy. I'm crushed, Barbara. Don't be crushed. You're pretty good. Just not Bill good.

You're not Bill good. I'll show you a picture when we get through. He's a good looking guy. Even as an old guy, he's a good looking old guy. All right. But still no good sex. It's hard when you get up there, you know. Hold on to your kilts, dearies.

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No. Oh. Dude, stop with the voice. Just keep it simple. I've seen promos on TV. Dude, this is how you get the fans engaged. This is how you get listeners. We're trying to get listeners here.

If we just say, oh, we're two dudes that talk about Bravo, people are gonna get tired of it already we need some oomph all right then fine let's try to do it with your voice brav bros good job um what is something that do you do is as fun as you are and you have such a good energy about you. To be as successful as you are, you must have dealt with adversity and challenges. Who hasn't? What is a moment that you look back over the years that was from like emotionally, a struggling, like a tough period of your life that you obviously eventually overcame

that you're really proud of? Because it was something that you, at the time it was happening, kind of brought you to your knees or really just kind of, you know, we've all been through those times where it's like, I don't know how I'm going to get over this, you know? Well, I've had so many failures, but I'm pretty good at that. Honest, honest, God, I'm great at getting back up. But one that I almost didn't get back up for, and I had the biggest success at the tail end, thank God I got up, was when my boyfriend and business partner, who loaned me the thousand

dollars to start my business, left me and married my secretary. I was only 30. I felt like 80 once he told me. She was five years younger than me, prettier than me. And he said, I'm marrying your secretary. I'm like, what? I couldn't get back up. Now we owned a business together. It took me a year to end that business. But through that year, I faked it every day of my life. I hated coming into the office that now she was sharing with Ramon Simone. She was sharing it and giggling. They're holding hands. It broke my heart every day. So I'm ashamed that it took me a year to end it. But if it hadn't happened, I wouldn't have had the Corcoran Group. That was the birth of the Corcoran Group. I ended Corcoran Simone and Corcoran Group was started because of that relationship. But it's ridiculous.

I thought I'd be nothing without him. He found me in my poor town. He gave me the thousand dollars. He showed me the world. He taught me real estate, all this, so all valid. But I thought without him, I would be nothing. Well, I wasn't nothing, especially when he told me on the way out the jury, you'll never succeed without me.

Because when he said that, I just knew I was going to succeed. It was like crystal clear. I'm going to succeed. I'm going to succeed no matter what, you know, just to show them kind of thing. Yeah. Big deal. You lose a boyfriend. Everybody has it happen all the time. But for me, I had a hard time with it. I was not confident, I guess. Yeah, not confident. Maybe it's because I wasn't good in bed and I didn't think I'd get anybody else. Maybe it was because I thought he left me because of that. Who knows?

All that entered in. Sure, yeah. But it was a hard recovery. Yeah, but heartbreak can really do that to you. Yeah. And you're right. It makes you question a lot of your self-worth and it makes you doubt yourself. Yeah.

And so you kind of did the fake it till you make it approach kind of on a good day i mean some days i was crying a little bit i hated i went out of the office to cry but some days not so good yeah yeah i'm sorry you went through that why are you smiling when you say that well because you're over it you know it's i am i'm a big believer that like especially it's so long ago to me it sounds like almost a good story for you it turned into a good story but all bad things turn into good stories if you hang in there don't you totally agree yeah yeah but like i've so many of us don't appreciate that at times well you have to walk through uh rejection and hard times to appreciate you come out the other side it never feels good when you're inside and if you do it enough you start to think it's your lucky charm like if something bad happens something good is on the

other side you know do you remember when that whole breakup happened was there like a turning point for you was there like a moment where you're wait wait i think i will be okay like actually were you is there anything you did that made you started where you actually started feeling better rather than faking it so to speak uh only after i left only when i divided the business we chopped it in half i went my way he went his way that was the beginning of my second business uh no what what was important is me walking to work on that friday morning it was just spur of the moment i just said i've had it i'm ending this business today i walked right and said guess what we're ending the business today here's how we're going to do it. Just like that. Just like looking at you,

I can picture you could vividly remember that day. Oh, exactly. I was so determined. There was nothing that was going to stop me, nothing to change my mind. But yet it was a good year after. And he was on his way to the altar with Tina the next month. I think that was kind of a psychological deadline. But I found myself a guy right away and was going to beat them to the altar in one month. I think that was kind of a psychological deadline, but I found myself a guy right away and was going to beat them to the altar in one month. I proposed to him on our second week date and he says, what, what, what's your intention? I said to this poor guy, he said, what do you mean? What's my intention? I said, well, you're going to marry me or not. How about next month? It was too soon. So in the end, I didn't win the contest that i had in my mind i got to the

altar about three months later the poor guy come this way hey follow me did you uh have did you ever the the ex the guy where's ramon ramon where's i i'm assuming you're doing much better than ramon these days oh i don't know if I'm doing much better. You know, he married my secretary. They had three children together. They did. And they stayed married for the longest time. So I guess it was meant to be, you know. I was immature.

Everybody falls in love. You don't mean to fall in love, you know. Yeah. It just happens. Why do I want to, I wanted them to not work out, I guess. I know. I'm so sad. Oh, well, let me tell you the real story.

Yeah, they went in a car and got crashed up. Okay. Leaving the office that day. No, not really. Well, they worked out, I guess. Yeah, they worked out, yeah. And then you're... However, I heard from one of my old associates at the Corcoran Group about four years ago

that Tina did leave and marry her uh tennis instructor but they had a long marriage i guess they've been married what 35 40 years and then she left to marry to marry her tennis instructor this is down in florida kind of weird i have to i have to say i laughed a little you'll have to forgive me but i did chuckle a little yeah spite is like a really strong thing it can it's it has staying power you don't believe no you send out those vibes it comes back and stabs you well i i agree but you did chuckle i chuckle well that's not really spite i wouldn't go so far as calling spite satisfaction a touch of satisfaction touch yeah pettiness pettiness me of course what's the pettiest thing you've ever done in business to an adversary

much bigger than me in my market at the time it's funny i forgot about this till you just said somebody recruited out one of my top salespeople, which I did not like. I was great at recruiting everybody else's top salesperson. So she was my second top salesperson. And the minute she went over to that firm, I sent him a dead fish wrapped in ice. I had just seen The Godfather, you know, the horse head in the back. So I couldn't get a horse head or I didn't want one. But I got a dead fish and wrapped it and just sent it. And I put love barb.

So stupid, you know? That's great. It felt good sending that. That's petty. That would qualify. Did he get a response? No response. But when I saw him at the real estate board at our regular meetings

that all the competitors had, he always looked at me. I was dying to say, get my fish, but I wouldn't give him the satisfaction. I knew by the way he looked at me that he thought I was crazy. So chances were good he got the fish. That is great. Thanks for reminding me of that.

I forgot all about that. Yeah. Yeah. Do you have any more? I have millions, but you have to give me something to kick them out yeah yeah do you have any more i have millions but you have to give me something to kick them out sure well any more petty stories oh petty stories uh no i wasn't so petty i'm sure i'm petty you know that's the only thing i could think of let's move on okay if i have something else pops in i'll let you know you're a straight shooter yeah

on for the most part for the most part uh what Shark Tank, we see all these kind of neat ideas or not so neat ideas. What's the dumbest idea you saw on Shark Tank that you asked yourself, how did this person make it in the room? A guy who wanted to put a device in your ear surgically so you could never pick up your phone again. It just rings in your ear. And then when the battery runs out, you get a surgical surgery to remove it and replace it. It was like, whoa, whoa. But we've had everything. We have the craziest things. We have, like, I remember the Rhodes Scholar who was asking only a million to build a tower in the middle of the Atlantic. Listen to this, to turn water, to turn saltwater into water. Then we had the dentist who said his toothpaste would put you

to sleep at night. We had the lady who said her lipstick would make you lose weight. You know, we have- Lipstick that made you lose weight. Yeah, crazy things, you know, with great enthusiasm, believing it. So we say it all, but the crazy ones are the more fun ones, you know? Yeah. They really are. They liven you up on the set when you're working 12-hour days. Like, whoa, really? You know? So your get-readies with me on TikTok are a big hit these days, I hear.

Yeah. Well, I mimicked, what's that girl's name? Alex Earl? Yeah. Hey, can I tell you? Have you met her? I never have, but I watched her and I thought, wow, let me get on this right away. This is so much fun. What's the secret sauce?

To do it for my doing it or for her? Or both of us what what it's two things at once yeah what did you learn from her to do two things at once tell a story while putting on makeup yeah it's great you know people have to see the makeup at the end yeah i tried one where i did in reverse i came out of makeup and then they took the makeup off and we basically rolled the tape opposite i said this is going to be a great hit i forget what the story was it was something about something backwards so it kind of went nobody liked it so i should stick with her formula okay do it that way i i would love for you to meet her oh i would yeah you're not going to suggest she'd be one of my best friends forget it she's too pretty

you don't want to hang out with pretty girls? Hell no. I don't even like these girls here. I mean, think about it. You bring these ladies here. They're going to be in the same frame as me, probably. That's not fair. I don't like you. Barbara, you are stunning. Look at you. Well, no, not relative to the two of you.

That's not true. That's all relative. It's all relative. And you're probably both good in bed. Well, you should be with those looks again not allowed to say especially with a fiancee on the side yeah yeah yeah we try to go there no definitely don't go there uh you're fun to hang out with barbara well what do you like to

do for fun are you always this fun or not always i'd be exhausted if i was always this fun i'm turning it off for you today come on but i'm generally fun i'm the fun master i'm the center of my family and friends if you want to have fun because i'm a great organizer i bring people together i always have themes i always have wacky things, some twists that nobody expects. I give the best parties, definitely the best parties. Yeah. Because I always have a weird imagination. How do I get invited to a barber party? I'll invite you to the next one. Yes. What's the theme that you're most proud of? The theme? Yeah. Oh gosh. The very last party I gave was great. I invited all my old timers from the Corcoran group. The original, I think I invited 32 people or something. 25 came, seven were dead.

So I didn't know. It was a way for me to find out who was still with us. Hey, Nick, when you get married, can you seat Barbara next to us? Can we share a table? Sure. Please. I'll never leave the table. Okay, good enough. I'll get you the best guys in the room. I'll never leave the table. Okay. Good enough. Okay. I'll get you the best guys in the room.

I got a great nose for good guys. Love this. Handsome and good. Both at once. Okay. So the average age of these gals coming, mostly gals, one gay guy, was probably 70, maybe even 75. They look terrible. I told them to wear their pajamas.

They came in with their pajamas. I had doctors there, fake doctors, feeling their chest, you know, with whatever that thing is they wear on their neck. They were all dressed in white. I had nurses. I had wheelchairs. And then halfway through the party, the lights went out. Everybody stopped. What's happening?

What's happening? And I had a gorgeous stripper, gorgeous. I was very particular about picking him out. Come and strip for the girls. Let me tell you, they were touching him, saying, we haven't seen young flesh in a long time. I gave out stacks of dollar bills. They were putting in his jockstrap. They were laughing. They were incredible. Two of the women went home. They never showed up. They had dementia. The kids were calling me like into three in the morning where's my mother you know but the mothers went home happy everybody was so happy and then they went home get it that's a good party i have to admit and i'm underestimating in the telling was bill there hell no how does does he get how does how does he how do you kindly ask him to leave i didn't have to kindly ask him i just didn't didn't have to kindly ask him. I just didn't let him know about the party.

And he was busy downstairs in his bedroom watching CNBC. Didn't hear a thing. Oh, and the other thing that happened at the party, one of the younger women, she was probably maybe 55. She fainted before the stripper. And we had to call 911. The guys came in with the stretcher. And everybody thought it was part of the act. And guy said invite us to a next party it looks so good i think get get my friend they took him outside what was the stripper dressed up as oh well fortunately

he was bald i saw him after oh let me not forget to tell you about this what he said okay but what was he dressed up as a army guy a vest with pockets okay army hat on low slung hipsters on boots and he took it all off except for his jock strap now you know that guy after he stripped i want to get rid of him right away you don't want to strip or hang out you know for the rest of the party right he cozied cozied up to me, had a Shark Tank pitch. Help me with my other business. What other business? Circus children's party business, he said. And not only that, I could help you with your finance.

I said, how is that? He whips out a prudential card and sends him a financial planner in the day. And he was like, I don't think I'll be hiring you to watch my money. Oh, my God. I couldn't make that up. I was like, I don't think I'll be hiring you to watch my money. Oh, my God. I couldn't make that up. I was like, what? Holy cow. It was like the little tip at the end of the party, you know?

That is incredible. Yeah. That's a great story. But I have a lot of parties. For the Corcoran group, we had a party February every year. You got to bring your lover. You didn't have to bring a husband or wife. Just bring your lover.

You plus lover. But people had to dress as something. They dressed 1950s, 60s, Broadway nuns. Put people in something bizarre. And you have a unity of group. Everybody's giggling. They're not themselves. They don't act themselves.

Give them alcohol. And you got yourself a great party. It seems like you're big on, yeah, like chemistry and having kind of people get outside of their comfort zones. It's a juice of life. Come on, you get people laughing you're a kid again or as close as you get to being a kid. Yeah, it's the best stuff. It's who you spend the time with. That's why it's going to be hard for you to become my friend because I'm going to be very particular about you. I hear you. In fact, I'm sizing you up right now. Right now, you're about a five out of 10. I'm not so sure you're going to get invited.

Where am I missing? Where am I falling short? Well, first of all, you should compliment me and say, you know, you are the most beautiful woman I've ever seen. You are. Well, even though I don't believe you, you're invited now. I can be bought. I love that. You look fantastic today yeah truly beautiful oh the most most beautiful i've ever seen oh you're coming to every party

at first i thought you were sincere i actually fell for the first line until you said it three times well you can't three times i can't compliment you three times well it starts to it makes makes me feel like you didn't believe in your first compliment if you had to repeat it another two times okay well what if i just want to insist that i'm beautiful yeah oh i would say okay i tell my fiancee she's beautiful all the time oh you should i don't believe it and i'm sure you believe well she's young to say she is beautiful it's really easy to say that for you yeah wait 30 years you're gonna have to pick up your game and think of other things to say you're a great cook honey oh you're a great mom oh you're good with the kids what is your you've lived a lot of life you have a lot of insight to offer people you're a little old now

go ahead what is something you're on tiktok what is advice you have for younger i guess women or men it doesn't really matter uh but especially dating like what do you see out there that confuses you where you're just like i don't understand why why people are doing this now you know it doesn't make sense to me. Anything that pop in your mind that you see younger people do? The only thing that pops in my head is people at a seemingly romantic date with their phones on the table.

I don't get it. I just can't accept why people bring a phone to a table, especially on a date with someone you're interested in, and they're sharing things on the phone. I get it, but it's hard for me to understand why there would be great conversation and a communication there. So not even on the table. I don't think so.

But most people have it. You shed some light for me. Why is that? I have no good reason. It's a bad habit. It's just a bad habit. So you don't think it's a good thing to have a phone and share what you're looking at? No.

Yeah. Oh, good. I'm happy to hear that. Yeah. I've done it. I do it, but I don't. Yeah's a good thing to have a phone and share what you're looking at and no yeah how good i don't think it's good yeah i've done it i do it but i don't yeah i'm not advocating for it i know it's bad yeah i always say someone does it with me whoever they are family friends or strangers that don't mind putting your phone away just like that i feel insulted by it yeah i don't want to share myself or my time with your phone you're good at knowing your own worth oh very much so right yeah you learn that as you go how did you learn that because i feel like a lot of people especially in the dating world i think they have a hard time believing that they should make

themselves a priority you know i think there's a lot of people especially women out there and you know it's just like they are afraid of not being liked they're afraid of you know kind of just kind of saying what they want because it's just like well i don't want to disappoint them or i don't want to sound crazy we hear that a lot too it's every time i'm like why don't you ask them you know it's just like they'll say this guy i'm dating he did x y or z what do you think and i'm always like well you could ask them and the response is something well i don't want to sound crazy i I don't want to sound annoying. What advice would you have for anyone to, or how you were able to know your self-worth and have the confidence that I have

the right to say this. I have the right to speak my mind and I don't really care what you think of me. You know, I used a trick when I was coming up through the ranks because I wasn't always confident. I was very insecure as a younger woman. But I think I learned to be secure. And a trick I use all the time is I would ask myself, what would a man do? And I think it applies here. What would a man do? You ask a guy, he's not going to have the same self-questioning comments or insecurities of putting themselves down, second guessing. Most men will, they're not that complicated. You know, they're just going to be who they're going to be, whatever that is. So I would think, stop thinking like a girl. I think that's all girly stuff that doesn't work. It smacks of desperation and neediness,

which is never attractive to anyone. Not just in dating. It's the same on Shark Tank. I mean, I get a needy person in front of me who I could smell they're needy. I don't want a part of that deal. I don't care how good it sounds or what the numbers are. It's inconsequential. It's like, ew, I don't want to be needed so much. No thanks amount. It's natural that people back away from need, but you can't just be secure overnight. I think you have to test it out and act the part and act the part until you start believing it, you know? And then little by little, I think the tape in your head changes. I think it does. I know it has for me.

Yeah, because people will then respond to you a little bit differently, too. Oh, definitely. They'll echo back what you think of yourself. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's a lot like buying businesses. There's so many parallels there.

You know, I wish I had bought businesses before I dated. It would have really helped me to keep the rules straight. Yeah. Yeah. businesses. There's so many parallels there. I wish I had bought businesses before I dated. It would have really helped me to keep the rules straight. Yeah. Well, I heard a story about some sort of real estate property. I think it was in New York that wasn't selling very well. This is a property I had? I think so. I heard- Most of them. But then you basically created a scarcity in the sense that you kind of, you know what I'm talking about? Yes, you're talking about the one day one price sale.

You made it seem like an exclusive one day, get in now before they're gone. You did that with real estate. Yeah. It saved my life, that deal. Tell us about that. You want me to tell you the story? I'd love to. Quick version?

Okay. So I was asked by- Or a long version. All right. Stay for lunch, Barbara. So one day- No. Stay for lunch, Barbara. So one day, no, an insurance company asked me to sell 88 apartments they owned without a public auction. They were desperate to get rid of them.

They wanted to look like the big shots, and they didn't want to look desperate. So I got it. I looked at the apartments. They were the dogs of the market. Interest rates were 18%. Nothing was selling. Nothing was selling. So I went back to them and said, I'd love to sell units, but there's no way they could be sold. They're front units,

back units. Some don't have kitchens. Some are nice lobbies, have no lobbies. You guys got to put money in if you want to sell this stuff. And I'd lay low. And they said, no, we have to sell it. We want to sell it now. And the developer that was in with the insurance company said to me, she's a smart girl. She'll figure it out. And I went, oh God. So he sent me back and I did figure it out that night. I remembered I went to a puppy sale with my mother and the kids, my nine brothers and sisters or however many we had at the time. And my mother said, look at that lady, the chicken farmer selling those puppies. You're going to think where this is going. This is going somewhere, believe me. So she said, look at how smart that chicken farm lady is.

She told everybody she had Jack Russell puppies, which they were, and she doesn't have enough to go around. I remember that and I mimicked it. So I told my salespeople at the time, maybe I had 30 salespeople. I said, hey, listen, we're having a private sale next Monday. 88 apartments, first come, first serve. They're priced all alike. High apartments, low apartments.

Pick of the litter. Whoever's there first grabs the best apartment. Well, when I got up that day and went around the corner on 83rd Street, I had like over 200 people in line waiting for my ADA puppies. Everything was boom, sold within the hour. And I made, I think, I forget exactly, about a million and one, but I'll say I made over a million dollars in one day. And I paid off all my debt.

I owed like $ 000 i opened a new office and i also had cash in my pocket because it was a 30-day closing boom boom boom easiest million but at the darkest hour and that always kind of happens you know yeah yeah so how could how would someone listening apply that to their dating life so to speak oh you know because i feel like a lot of people out there almost like there's that reek of desperation a little bit there's a little bit too much supply if you will you know how would someone it's about availability i mean i i hate to say you have to play a game but but dating is similar negotiation it's mostly a game and then some fact in there you know um i would be very careful about my timing

saying yes when when i reach the timing speaks louder than the words i think whether you're texting whether you're calling i think you have to drag things out and not be so available no i'm not available then but how about next week what when the guy just built up the courage i'm taking it from the woman's viewpoint you know no yeah no i think and no i think a guy's got to play it cool too i think you got to play it cool it's a game in the beginning you know? Yeah, no. Yeah, no, I think a guy's gotta play it cool too. I think you gotta play it cool. It's a game in the beginning, you know? I totally agree. You do.

You say that to people? Play a game? I mean, I just acknowledge that there is a game. Yeah, there is a game. Because everyone says, oh, I don't wanna play a game. I think most people play games with themselves, you know? Yes. Where they're just like, they tell themselves,

well, I don't like this, well, I don't care. Yes. We tell ourselves we don't care all the time and we really care. Yeah, very much. It's better just to acknowledge that you do care and then try to figure out how to not let people know how much you care. Yes, definitely. Yeah. Do you know, you said, how do you figure out your self-worth?

We're talking about dating. I really, that was paramount in importance for me coming up the pike. I sold my business and I got the price I asked for it. 66 million. They offered me 22. I said, no, it's 66 million, but I knew my worth. There's no rules in figuring out worth on anything. So I knew what I thought my business was worth. I just named it and I got it. I mean, that's about just having the sense of yourself is I just feel like it's worth that, you know? And the same with dating. You have to know what you're worth and just act it. You know, I could get a lot of husbands.

I've only had two. Okay. It's just, I wouldn't make them happy, but I could catch them good because I'm great at that game. The poor guys, thank God I'm safely on the shelf. That's great. thank god i'm safely on the shelf oh that's great did you hear um i know did you hear about the whole netflix debacle on their live event so how would you deal i'm curious is a the the the kind of business icon that you are netflix had their love is blind reunion love is blind is a kind of

popular reality tv dating show and you know live streaming is relatively new to these platforms. They're trying it. Amazon has football and Netflix did. So there was no editing, right? Yeah, it was set to tape live. But it was a nightmare for Netflix. Why was it a nightmare? Because it ended up not being live.

Oh. They had technical difficulties. It was their big event. You know, they were. Did people have to sign up and pay extra for it? No. No, it was included. No, you could go on Netflix.

It was, they were promoting it. You know, it was our first, you know, Love is Blind reunion. It's going to be live. You know, our first live Love is Blind reunion. And it came to, you know, the time. Gosh. How did that happen? I don't know.

But what would you. Do in response to that? Yeah. Gosh, how did that happen? I don't know. But what would you do in response to that? How would you handle that? You know, how would you handle a big moment for your company? You've, it's a big marketing push. It's you've, you're, you're going to change the game, so to speak. And then it falls on its face. You have to remember, everybody loves somebody who fails. They identify with the failure better than a winner. So everybody thinks of Netflix as a winner. If it was my business, I would get right up there as the head of the company. I don't know who the head of Netflix is. Probably somebody decent knows how to talk, right? I would get right up and do a public apology and send it to every single subscriber and give them the next month free. It might sound

crazy, like it would be a lot, but people then would talk about how wonderful Netflix is. You'd flip it on its ass, you know? Yeah. Yeah. And it would be expensive, I'm sure. Easy for me to say, not my money, but definitely you spend money like that, it always comes back to you, probably in spades. Yeah. Yeah. Tell me a little bit more about that, because I think people are very afraid of that concept, especially if people maybe don't have a lot of it, they're tight with money. But the idea that you had to spend money to make money or investing in yourself, specifically investing in yourself, whether it's monetarily or just in general. Well, you know what? I think I had a great head start because of my mother. We had 10 kids we could hardly feed when my

dad lost his job, right? But my mother was cool as a cucumber. She's a phenomenal lady. And she always felt that money was meant to be spent, you know? So we in rotation basis saw the dentist. So it took you 10 years to see the dentist again. We each got two people at a time, got a new coat for Christmas. So you had to wait five years for a new coat. Then you got the hand-me-downs, but you understood what the rules are. But my mother spent every penny she had, and not just on food. She always said, money's meant to be spent. One time when I was going bankrupt, or near bankrupt, I shouldn't even say the word. Again, I thought I was going to go bankrupt. And I called my mother and she said, you sound so preoccupied, Barbara. What's going on? I said, I'm actually going to close a business, Mom. It

was like 12 years old. She goes, close the business. I said, yeah, because we owe so much money. It's a terrible time. It's not changing around. I've tried everything. I started whining a bit. And she said, wait, you're not worried about money, are you? And I said, yeah, I'm worried about money. And she said, what a waste of time. Let it go. And I swear, I don't know what my next idea was that I got that day, but by her saying, let it go, I thought of another idea. It wasn't the one day sale, something else that made me a lot of money quick. Okay. I thought of something. I think your attitude toward money is, is a reason for money. It's, I don't believe it's about saving it. I've never saved a dime yet.

I have a ton saved. I try to spend it and I still have a ton of money saved. I think that I have always been, if I have a dollar coming in, where could I spend it? I see $20,000 coming in. Whoa, where can I spend that? And I have it earmarked and spent before it even arrives. And I think if you have that confidence about the money not being the issue, but doing well as the issue, it comes and it replenishes itself. I know I sound like a nut job saying that, but for me, it has always worked that way. No, I don't think it's crazy at all. It has worked that way. You don't worry about money. You don't put a, well, I think I said it.

But how do you, so, you know, how do you figure out where to spend that money? Because it's not like you're spending $20,000 on fun. Oh, definitely. If you don't have a lot of money and you spend your last time on a vacation, you come back and you find a way to make money. If you're with a company and everybody's having hard times, you think of something that you do bizarre together. Everybody starts laughing and somebody brings in a deal. It always works that way. You just loosen it up. When you have a money problem, you get tight about it. It takes your focus. You think about it. So you go the other way. You have a little fun

loosen it up and things kind of loosen up along with it yeah there's definitely a lot of wisdom in that yeah even even if if you don't if you take money out of it or just again back to dating or just your value yes it is we take ourselves so seriously so tightly wound and kind of easy to say and hard to let it go yeah Yes. You know? For sure. But you could make a habit of letting it go, I think, just by practicing it again and again. Yeah. This is actually a perfect segue. We have our sweating the wedding caller who has a question that is financial related.

Sweating the wedding caller. Yeah. New segment. Okay. Yeah. So we have a caller coming in. I'm probably going to give her bad advice. That's okay.

Amazing. How's it going? Hi, I'm probably going to give her bad advice. That's okay. Amazing. How's it going? Hi, I'm Hannah. I'm 27 and I'm a bridesmaid in a wedding that's costing me thousands of dollars. And I don't know how to say something without ruining a friendship. Okay. Well, tell us more about this friendship that you're afraid of ruining. So I'm a bridesmaid in one of my childhood friends' weddings

and the expenses are getting kind of out of control. And I knew that there would be costs associated with being in a wedding. I've been in my other friend's wedding, so I know that there's a dress and you go on a bachelorette party and all that fun stuff. But what I have the biggest problem with is that none of it was run past any of us. We were not asked for our budgets. We were not given an estimated amount of how much it would cost when we were asked to be in the wedding. And now we're just getting Venmo requested for things that the maid of honor has decided to buy. Oh, so are these decisions from the bride or the maid of honor?

I think it's both. Neither of them have asked any of us. decisions from the bride or the maid of honor? I think it's both. Okay. Neither of them have asked any of us. They've just sort of decided on their own and now are requesting us for everything. Okay. Including the cost of the gown? Didn't you have to shop for the gown together? Well, I think their gowns.

Their gowns, yeah. The bridal gown. Yeah. No, your bridesmaid outfit. Didn't you have to shop? Except for our bridesmaid's dresses. But did you have to shop together for that? No, they just picked them. Wow. Well, why don't you protest? Use your voice.

I mean, why don't you become the spokesperson? I'm a little nervous about coming off rude. No, you use the word we. You use the word we. We filters everything down, waters it down, you know? Well, you're going to get the permission of the other bridesmaids, right? But they feel the same way you do? Yeah, what if you talk to them or send an email and say i'd like to speak up and say we can't spend this much money and could we choose something more reasonable

what are that's kind what are some of the things that you're getting vemo requested for so for all of the um decorations for the bridal shower you gotta be kidding that old cheapskate is that normal all the travel no no for a bachelorette trip i would divide everything up yeah or like for a shower it's we've done like a almost like potluck style but not just like rogue venmo requests without it being discussed what it's it's it's the responsibility of the bridesmaids to pay for the decorations of a bridal shower? I don't know about a bridal shower,

but for Bachelorette, I split everything across everybody. But do you ask permission? Well, to be fair, I went out of my way to make sure it was like the most reasonable weekend. I did like a... She was Google mapping where every single bridesmaid was traveling from to try to find the most central city with the most affordable flights.

Like Ali was incredibly considerate about this. Wait around till Ali gets married again and go to her, be her bridesmaid. She was the bridesmaid. Oh. Yeah. I was the maid of honor. Maid of honor. That's what a good maids of honor looks like.

Maid of honor. With the maid of honor, have there been any instances where you've sort of tried to push back on anything, even if it was just a totally separate decision? Like, do you know how she responds to kind of low level confrontation or other ideas? That was booked because it was about 250 a night for a weekend of four nights. Oh. And so that was like a little bit of pushback. What happened? I don't know how that conversation went, though. Can you ask that bridesmaid how it went? The booking of the Airbnb and stuff, that should all be run past everybody.

And it shouldn't be booked before you know who's confirmed and who's coming and who can afford to come. Right. Right. I think everybody confirmed. Before any of the expenses were sort of laid out on the table. Does it make you feel any better hearing that the usual way is not that way? Does it make you feel like you should speak up, that it's wrong the way she's doing? It's not customary? you feel like you should speak up that it's wrong the way she's doing it's not customary a little bit i fear that it's gone too far down the rabbit hole to start to pull back so we're going to nashville in a couple weekends so some of the things can't be reversed at this point but in terms of like the future like extra little gifts for the bride and stuff that we didn't decide on as a group. I feel like maybe if that's not customary, that gives me more,

yeah, to push back. So what, so yeah, that's my question. So at this point, are you, you're pretty much committed to going to Nashville and going to the, Oh yeah. And you've already, I'm assuming sent some money. And so your big thing is, okay, I've spent a lot of money already. I just can't afford to spend any more. And we just need to make sure we're on the same page about that. That's kind of where you're at right now. Exactly. Yeah. So I guess to Barbara's point, can't you as a collective with some of the other bridesmaids say, hey, compliment her, make her feel good. You've been amazing, maid of honor. And we're so looking forward to this really great weekend. We're excited. Everything's nice.

But we've reached basically our limit on our budget. We're tapped out. And so we just want to give you a heads up that going forward, we're just not going to be able to do that. Because that way, then that might limit her decision on spending more or that might affect you know now that she's aware because it sounds like there just hasn't been any like upfront expectations talked about budget right it's just like she's just like oh well she's deciding what the budget is based off what she can afford knowing that she's going to have divided by how many bridesmaids there are without having talked to anyone. But if she hears from how many other bridesmaids are there? I think six or seven of us.

Yeah. So six or seven of you email say, hey, super fun. Can't wait. This is going to be amazing. But we're at our limit in terms of budget. So going forward, we'd really appreciate it if you just run some ideas by us because not all of us can afford more than what we've already spent. And I think it's important to do it sooner versus later because one, to Nick's point, if she can pull out and not do a party bus and you'll just Uber. There are things that might pop up, especially at a bachelorette party that maybe she could tone down. And you don't want the party bus showing up to the Airbnb and all of you kind of having this like sigh. Here goes the rest of our money in front of the bride who just wants to be there with all of her favorite people. And then she senses a shift in the energy and then her weekends off.

Yeah, like framing it to the maid of honor as like I it's so wonderful how much you want to celebrate the bride. And I can see you're putting so much effort into it. And I am so excited to be there with you and right now like just if we spend any more money I think my stress level will surpass my ability to be like present and happy and like show up as a bridesmaid the way I want to be like framing it really so it's really hard for her to get defensive maybe it seems like what we're going for what do you what are you aware of her like financial situation is she like does she come from money or you're just not really sure how she's coming up with this money i know that she does well for herself i know that a number of us in the bridal party also do and so

it surprises me that she's not also feeling stretched um well that was because i put myself in that category it's possible that she is is kind of why i asked the question she there's a there's a world in which she as the maid of honor was just like i really want to crush this role i want to be the best maid of honor and just is kind of more thinking about all the ideas that she has and it's gotten a little like out of control almost there's a world in which the group if it's you know again you lead with complimenting her and make her feel like she's doing an amazing job and all that stuff where she's like, you know what? Oh, yeah, maybe maybe things have got. You know what?

I'm glad we're on the same page. Let's let's tail it back going forward. That's possible. And, you know, you might she might even be getting a lot of pressure from the bride. It might not be her. She might feel a sense of relief. I would like to add to these very good suggestions. I think you should do it in writing an email.

It takes great courage for you to represent the group and have a one-on-one conversation. Ideal. But if you're not that type of personality where you like to confront things, you're not going to power through something. Something talking entirely we through a whole email and getting the blessing of the other girls has much more power, I think, think it is a little safer for you a little less confrontational than one-on-one over the phone and you don't feel like it's ganging up if it's all we language like she'll feel ganged up on yeah i think it's all in the wording you know again you're just like hey

we're super excited for this weekend. It's going to be so much fun. And all of us are so excited. All of us. You've done an amazing job. But you broke the bank. Yeah. We're just a little like.

And we don't like you now. And we don't like the bride to boot. Yeah. Say that. And we're not coming, by the way. P.S. You're the worst. We can't stand you. And I never liked you since I was four.

And I'm then requesting you for the Airbnb back. Yeah. See how bad you could be if you wanted to be. So all you're doing is a nice email. Yeah. I think it can be fine. I mean, we don't know your friends, like it shouldn't be thought of as it's just more like we don't have

the money you know write the email read it back to yourself you know check for tone maybe have someone read it you know or have the girls edit it yeah because there's a way of it not sounding attacking where it's just like don't you know well we just you know

don't write in we didn't appreciate you not asking us it's's just like don't you know well we just you know don't write in we didn't appreciate you not asking us it's literally just make it about you're out of money and p.s screw you before she spends more you just want to be up front that there's there's there's no more money so it's rather than trying to fix what she already did it's just more trying to prevent further spending happening. Going forward. That seems like a good middle ground. And if not drop the friendship, you don't need her.

I knew I'd get you to laugh. We need Barbara on the trip. Yeah, literally bring her along. I can't wait to go. She'll see you in Nashville. What's the most fun bachelorette trip you've ever been on I've never been on one you've never been on a bachelorette trip

they didn't have them when I was in my category of getting married way back then they never had them my son is going to three bachelor parties he's 28 overseas I never heard of such I said where do they get the money from he said from their parents

I said well don't look at this parent. Oh, my gosh. It's gotten very rich. Very rich. Crazy. Yeah. No, the wedding industry is. Yeah.

Crazy. Don't worry. She's going to get married, be miserable for the rest of her life. You're fine. Only joking. The ultimate revenge. You're not going to gonna be happy here comes the bride do you feel good about the plan of sent like touching base with the other bridesmaids kind of being like everybody's on the same page here like cool just making this a going forward thing and then sending an email being like hey i was chatting with some of the other bridesmaids and we just wanted to start

like first of all say you've done an amazing job you know compliments but going forward we're tapped out yeah like if we spend any more i think like the stress of spending will get in the way of having a good time which is that's a great way yeah that's a good line that's a great way to do it yeah does that sound good i really like that line yeah perfect okay well we're gonna want an update yeah when you send it what response you you get, how the trip goes. Yeah. If you broke up the wedding. And send us the savings. I really hope that part doesn't happen.

No, it won't. Don't be afraid of that. That's the thing. If the priority's on the bride, it'll be fine. You're being very reasonable. And yeah, I just don't know how anyone getting married can't acknowledge that your budget might be different than their budget. And as someone who recently got engaged, what I want when i plan a wedding is to not be

stressed or not stress people out i just want to enjoy my time and that's the only priority and there's just so many ways to waste money you know on a bachelor trip on a bridal shower and you're you're basically asking them to cut back on the things that clearly no one really needs. And she's just out there like, let's do this and let's do that and let's do that. And there's been like no kind of limit into, you know, what they should have. And now you just have to tail it back a little bit. Yeah. And getting together with the other girls, I think, will make it even more apparent.

Because I know even some of them are feeling it stronger than I am. And so I can't imagine what they've been sort of going through the past couple months on like their financial state. Yeah. And what you don't want, and you're doing this kind of for the group is you don't want by the time the wedding happens, everyone just pissed off at the bride and the maid of honor. And instead of enjoying the wedding happens everyone just pissed off at the the bride and the maid of honor and instead of enjoying the wedding everyone's kind of talking shit how broke they are yeah like resentment and alcohol are not a good combination yeah you're right about that it's dangerous so you're probably going to speak your mind on your third martini you better get the email out all right all right all right well good luck hey by the way get married yourself

soon and get even with that bitch that's going in the promo yeah all right well good luck keep us posted thank you all right All right. Take care. Barbara, before you go, I want your take on something. Not too long ago, Jesse James Decker had a sister-in-law? Was it a sister? Sister-in-law. Yeah. It's made national news.

And it's an interesting debate because I wasn't sure how I thought about it. Her sister-in-law has- Her pregnant sister. Her pregnant sister. Her pregnant sister also has a two and a five-year-old yes she was traveling alone with the two and the five-year-old the plane served popcorn i think it's an important detail united united airlines they the plane served yeah they provided the popcorn they provided the popcorn that then one of her children that is important spilled in the aisle a flight attendant then came up to her and told her like gave her a trash bag and said you need to clean this up it's a safety hazard now so a woman who is 22 weeks pregnant was crying on her hands and knees feeling really like humiliated and overwhelmed after this long travel day with

two kids cleaning up popcorn and it sparked a lot of debate because some people are like it's not other people's responsibility to clean up after your kids like their flight attendants they're they're not like your ladies yeah but then for other people there's like have some mercy you know she's pregnant she has two young kids if you see a mother flying or a parent flying with little children like i feel such empathy for them because it seems like such a struggle. It is a struggle. Like flying by myself is a struggle and having two young screaming kids at times

can be a real challenge. And so what's your thoughts on that? I'm sure most people are in your court. I mean, you know what's lacking in that whole scene? Humanity. Yeah. Empathy and humanity. I don't care who you are.

And why didn't the people around her help clean up yes i'm like hey i would have been first one down to help that's that's a good point it's everyone fucked up in this situation was the airline steward taken to task on that did she get reprimanded or did the airline back her up i don't know uh well the she should be in jail the husband of the woman said thank you everyone for the support this is a tweet united airlines is taking care of the matters of the woman said, thank you, everyone, for the support. This is a tweet. United Airlines is taking care of the matters with the flight attendant internally. Oh, terrific.

OK. So she's being reprimanded. Yeah. Yahoo. Justice. So you have a hard stance on she may not be a maid, but she could have handled that a lot differently. Oh, you know, I could picture her tone makes all the difference.

Can you hear that tone? Like, you've got to clean this up. I can figure, yeah. I'm assuming it was more like that rather than, hey, I'm like really sorry. But you know what? Honestly, I think the saddest thing as we go on in time is a lack of kindness.

It goes so far. To do anything a little kind. Do you think the world's become more and more self-centered and individualistic that we've, we talk a lot about empathy, but we don't necessarily execute on it? Of course. Don't you? Yeah. Yeah.

I mean, it sounds cool. You want to be seen as a good guy, but we're all more distant. Yeah. We don't walk in the other guy's shoes. No. And you know what the satisfaction is in walking in the other guy's shoes. And you know what the satisfaction is in walking in the other guy's shoes? I have a younger brother and I used to get impatient with a waitress who didn't bring the food or a clerk who didn't.

I used to get impatient, you know? And he told me, consider she's doing the best she can. And he's changed me. I've been thinking that for 20 years now. Yeah. You don't know what she's going through at home. This could be all she could bring to the table. Now, that made me feel so guilty. I straightened out. But I always think, isn't it the best they can and I'm kind instead? It takes so little effort

to be kind. And you go to bed feeling good about yourself. So important. I'm so kind. Barbara, it's been an absolute pleasure to talk with you again. It's been an absolute pleasure to speak to you, big guy. Yeah, thank you. It really has been fun. It's always enjoyable. I hope to do it again soon. My pleasure.

Thanks for letting me flirt with you. I love it. Anytime. Okay. Likewise. I asked Natalie if I could flirt with you today. No, you didn't. I did.

Come on. Give you a flirting hall pass? Yeah. Did he really ask you that? No, Natalie. Oh asked Natalie if I could flirt with you today. No, you didn't. I did. Come on. Give you a flirting hall pass? Yeah. Did he really ask you that? No, Natalie. Oh, Natalie. I got to keep my people straight. I don't need to ask them shit.

Of course. What did she say? She said, no, go for it. She said, she's old. Don't worry about it. Do everything you want to her. Where can my audience find you, Barbara, on on social media where can they follow everything you're doing everything just find what it's what's your favorite platform and look at my name barbara

corcoran yeah but i like tiktok best it's the most fun you're crushing it on tiktok yeah i love it do you have any tips for me on tiktok yeah yeah be yourself just be yourself everybody you like on tiktok you could sense it being themselves. That's so true. Yeah. Well, thank you for coming. It's always a pleasure. Thank you guys for listening. Don't forget to send those questions

at asknickatthevilefiles.com. Don't forget we have another episode of Better Date Than Never tonight live at 9 p.m. Don't miss it. It's going to be a wild, wild episode. Don't forget to check out all the amazing content behind Vile Files Plus. Go to vilefiles.com to subscribe. You get a seven-day free trial. And don't forget, we out all the amazing content behind vile files plus go to vilefiles.com to

subscribe you get a seven day free trial and don't forget we have a new update special tomorrow on vile files classic for all of you fans who love the good updates don't forget to check that out it's a wild episode thanks for listening bye you