The Viall Files - E610 Going Deeper with Scott Evans - The Barbie Movie, Childhood, and Nick’s Lake House Update

Episode Date: July 13, 2023

Welcome back to The Viall Files: Going Deeper Edition! At the beginning of the episode, we get an exciting update from Nick about how he was finally able to purchase the lake house that his grandfather built and give it back to his mom. Then, we are joined by Scott Evans to talk about his role in the upcoming Barbie movie, what filming was like, and his thoughts on Margot Robbie, Ryan Gosling, and Will Ferrell. We also ask him about his current relationships with his boyfriend and his siblings - and get some great childhood stories about his brother Chris. We then have a Sweating the Wedding caller who isn’t sure if she should fire her bridesmaid after finding out she cheated on her brother - while the bride is pro-fire, her mother is adamantly against it.  “My crazy partying antics finally got me a job!”  Start your 7 Day Free Trial of Viall Files + here: https://viallfiles.supportingcast.fm/  Please make sure to subscribe so you don’t miss an episode and as always send in your relationship questions to [e-mail] to be a part of our Monday episodes. Join us for our new LIVE show on Thursdays at 9PM ET/6PM PT on Amp, available in the Apple app store. Android User? Listen here: https://www.onamp.com/  To Order Nick’s Book Go To: http://www.viallfiles.com   If you would like to get some texting advice on Office Hours send an email to [e-mail] with “Texting Office Hours” in the subject line! To advertise on the show, contact [e-mail] or visit https://www.advertisecast.com/TheViallFiles  THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSORS: Lume Deodorant - As a special offer for listeners, new customers GET $5 OFF a Lume Starter Pack with code VIALL at https://www.LumeDeodorant.com  Wondery - Follow Diss and Tell wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon Music or Wondery app. Paramount - Paramount Plus. Stream Now.  Blueland - Blueland has a special offer for listeners. Right now, get 15% off your first order by going to https://www.Blueland.com/VIALL  Episode Socials: @viallfiles @nickviall @scottevansgram @alison.vandam @liffordthebigreddog @dereklanerussell 

What's going on everybody welcome back to another exciting episode of the vile files going deeper edition I'm Nick your host of this award-winning, fantastic, popular show, joined by the household of Allie, Genevieve, and Derek. Amanda is still on a life expedition, life-searching journey, traveling the world. How's everyone doing? What's going on? I'm still at the lake. We'll get into that. Excited to share that story with you. But before we do, let's just check in with the household. How's everyone doing? Mental health check.

What's going on? What's new? What's cracking? Mental health check. I see Kiki. Lay it all out there. Kiki's thriving. Kiki's obsessed with Genevieve. So anytime that they're together, they're both thriving.

I have Jeff is sitting. Jeff is also sitting behind me on the couch here. I don't know if you can see him. I missed you, man. Does Jeff like the water? I've seen him out in the canoe. Well, he... No.

Okay. He's kind of a wuss when it comes to water. He hates the pool. I've tried to throw him into the pool a few times. Not to be mean, but I just want to know

if he can swim because it's like, hey, if you ever fall in, I've tried to train him to know the exits and things like that. So he can swim. He doesn't quite like the water. But here at the lake, it was quite charming. I went and I kayaked a little bit. And you obviously can walk into the lake. It's a fairly shallow

shoreline at the lake. And so I turned around and he was following me by swimming. I was in the kayak and it was quite cute. I think Natalie took a video of it. Yeah, I saw that. So he's acclimating himself to the water. But he has no problem. Like, he loves a good pontoon ride.

So he loves, he's good at jumping on the boat and jumping, you know, from the dock to the boat. So he's gotten good at that. Good job, Mr. Man. He loves it out here.

Yeah, he's thriving. He's become an outdoor dog. He went from city slicker to the lake dog real fast. Love. Aw. Did this lake house come with... I'm looking behind you. I'm like, did it come with all this furniture?

Did it come with the kayaks? How did this all come to be? Mom was ready to go. Okay. Oh, yeah. She basically took... They essentially almost moved out of their regular house. I mean, they plan on living up here full time eventually.

I think my brother is going to buy their house, which is also really cool, right? That is nice. It's kind of keeping everything in the family, so to speak. So I was really excited about that because I think some of us are realizing that Bella is about to, she's the youngest. She just graduated high school. is she just graduated high school. So depending on what she does, they're finally empty nesters, so to speak. And so they certainly don't need two houses. And the one they have now is probably,

you could argue, not necessarily too big for them, but more than they need. That's for sure. So they've talked about selling it. And then Jacob, my brother, I think he's going to swoop in and save the day and buy that from them, which is really exciting. Yeah. I'm just sentimental that I obviously grew up in that house. I've lived in that house since I was four. And so yeah, now we're at the lake house. So for other people who saw the video, who want to know the details here, I'll give you the backstory. All right. So the lake house I'm at, for those of you who haven't heard the story, the backstory. All right. So the lake house I'm at, for those of you who haven't heard the story, it's a house that my grandfather built in 1965. And it's where my mom grew up. So my mom was seven when she moved in. She essentially lived here her whole childhood. And then when I was

obviously a kid, we would come up here often on the weekends, certainly a lot in the summer. It was like my nirvana. It was just the most magical place. It's on this very beautiful, small private lake. It's like the perfect size lake where it's calm. It's perfect for water skiing, which Aaron from The Bachelorette, maybe he'll enjoy the water skier. But yeah, it's this beautiful private lake and it's great. And so when my grandpa died when I was like nine or 10 in 1990, they sold it. And I remember being devastated and like, why would you sell it? How could you? I was just beside myself. But it's in central Wisconsin. It's in the middle of nowhere. It's in a small town.

It's basically outside of an already very small town. So it's just in the middle of nowhere. And it would just been very tough for my then grandmother. Well, she's still my grandmother, but she has since passed. But I just take care of it. So they sold it. She moved closer to us. And yeah, my whole life, I just always had these reoccurring dreams about being back up on the lake. And it was always some version of either we bought it back or we never got rid of it or some version of the family that bought it always basically let us come whenever we want and hang out on the lake. And I'd always be on the lake and then when I'd wake up, so I'd be like on a boat or I kind of just don't even like walking on the lake. Obviously, these were like weird dreams, but I'd always wake up when I

was on the lake every morning. And what were you saying? Oh, yeah. I said, no, but like, you know, I was just on the lake. You know, I don't remember like if I was on a boat, I just remember being on the lake. Then I'd always wake up every morning a boat. I just remember being on the lake. Then I'd always wake up every morning when I'd have these very recurring dreams. I don't know how many I've had, but I remember having them my whole life, even into adulthood. And so I got this tattoo. I have the tattoo of the lake house on my... When I got tattoos, obviously, I always wanted to get things that were meaningful to me, that told a story about my past or my future, or just something that was about a family member or family in general.

So I got the lake house and I got a tattoo of the lake house. And I was on the phone with my uncle. And I remember thinking, we just started reminiscing about the lake house. And then I asked him, do you know who owns it? Because I didn't even know who owned it or anything like that. And then my uncle I was talking to, he didn't really know. And he mentioned he thought it was owned by a handful of brothers that shared it as a summer thing. And I was thinking to myself, oh, well, that's going to be impossible because you have to get everyone to agree. But the thought crossed my mind, up into that point in my life, I just bought my very first house in LA a couple years ago. So the thought of being able to buy back this lake house in the middle of nowhere, Wisconsin,

just wasn't a thought. But then when I was having that conversation with my uncle, I finally realized, wait, shit, I'm in a position financially that I could potentially do this if it became available. And then I sat on that information and didn't do anything with it. And a couple months later, this was two years ago, I got a text from my uncle with a picture of the for sale sign of the cottage. And he's like, Hey, we got to move on this fast. And then before I got out of a meeting that I was in, he had told me that it was already an accepted offer on the house. And I was devastated. But it didn't stop me from reaching out to the agent, tell the story and send him a picture of the tattoo and write him a letter.

And I tried very hard to get the person who was buying it to walk away from it. And I tried to make it very much worth their while. But they had their own reasons for wanting to be on the lake. And they had their own story of trying to get on the lake, but not being able to get on the lake in the past. trying to get on the lake, but not being able to get on the lake in the past. So it was kind of like a perfect storm in a bad way that the then buyer declined my offer and bought the place. And I was just devastated. It's just like, oh my God, if I would have just known 24 hours sooner, I would have been able to get this lake. And the guy who was selling it at the time was the guy who bought it from my grandfather. So

he knew my grandfather, remember my grandfather. He's just the nicest guy. And I remember him being devastated when he found out that I was open to buying it because people on the lake, they care very much who they sell the house to. A lot of it is people passing it down to family members and things like that. You always want to make sure the person who's taking over your house is going to love it as much as you do. And so they were pretty bummed about that. But there's nothing you can do at that point once you have an accepted offer. For those of you who don't know, the buyer has more rights than the seller once you have an accepted offer. There's always these contingencies of ways you can get out of the offer. For example, you have inspections and the appraisal and things

like that. And if those things don't meet certain criteria, the buyer can say, hey, wait, I thought I was getting this and it turns out I'm getting that. I want to back out. So I was hoping for that, but that never happened. And as a seller, there's nothing you really can do unless the buyer wants to back out if some of the contingencies don't meet the standards. So anyways, I had never been up on this house. I still hadn't been up in 32 years or it was 31 years at that point. And then finally, last 4th of July, I reached out to the guy who bought it and said, maybe it's time just to go up there because I had made this offer without even going up to the lake. There's this thought of like, well, maybe as sentimental

as I am about this place, maybe once I go there, it just won't be the same. I mean, the last time I was there, I was 10. So maybe it's going to be different and maybe it just won't live up to my memory. And it wasn't for sale at this point. So I reached out to the then owner, graciously had me and my mom and Natalie up last 4th of July weekend prior to. And what was crazy is that it was exactly how I remembered it. So they took us out on the lake and it felt like a surreal moment of being in my dream. It was amazing just how familiar things all looked. And then we noticed things like I posted when they built the house in 1965, as many families do, like they had

six kids. And so when they built it, poured in the concrete, they all carved their names in the steps. And when we were kids, we would kind of play hops, you know, like hopscotch or, you know, hopscotch, whatever you call it. Yeah. And we would kind of like jump down the steps and like see who could skip down the steps and repeat the names as fast as they could, you know, things you do when you're kids. And then we noticed that those were still there. And they were just little things that were still...

The birdhouse my great-grandfather built, he used to be a birdhouse maker. And so it was all beat up and old, but it was still there. This old swing was still there that my mom used to play on. So many little things that were still preserved on the property. And so we had a great time. They took us around the lake. And then I just said to the guys, if you ever change your mind or you find something else in the lake, let us know. And fast forward a couple months ago or a month ago, I got a surprise text from the owner who said he was willing to sell it to me. And they had found another property on the lake. And I think they very graciously thought about

us coming up and it felt right for us to be there. And it all worked out. So a little bit of back and forth, but it was a very lovely family who bought it and was willing to sell it to us. I have so much gratitude for them. But yeah, and I was able to finally buy it, which is so surreal. And then I had to leave town. I did a project. Excited to share that project with you guys coming up. I can't talk about it yet. But I had to leave the country and they closed on it when I was out of the country. So I couldn't... I wasn't able to be there when they closed. My parents were there. And I didn't get back until... So I got back into the country. And then first time I got to come up here was...

I got here on the 4th of July, which to put a whole bow on the story, the 4th of July is my grandparents. My grandparents who built this house. It was their wedding anniversary. Oh, wow. So it was crazy that the first time I was able to come up and be there after I finally owned the house was the wedding anniversary of my grandparents who obviously built the house. So it was kind of cool that way. And you know what's so crazy though too is like,

so after being up on the lake for a couple hours, immediately Nanny and I took the jet ski out, kind of went around the lake. It felt very ceremonious to jump in the lake because last year when I visited, I didn't get in the water. So it was my first time in that lake in 32 years since I was a kid. And after being there for a couple hours, what was crazy about it was just how familiar it all started to feel again. It didn't feel like I had to warm up. I was there for three or four hours and then sat around with my sister and it was like, holy shit, it's like we never left. It was just amazing just how familiar obviously the yard was, the property, the house itself. The previous owner who bought it from my grandfather, they did some minor remodeling.

And you can notice a difference, but it's more similar than it is different, the house. And so it's just crazy just how... It really feels like we never left. It was so surreal and so bizarre. It's amazing how much it still feels like it's a part of me. So anyways, it was just the coolest. I mean, it's like... The most surreal thing about the whole experience is that I feel like I'm literally living a dream because it's a dream I've had my entire life. And it's like, not to sound corny, but it's like, I keep wondering if I'm going to wake up from this dream because in this moment, other than podcast, I never had a dream about podcasting with my team

up here. But literally, every time I'm up here on the lake, there's always this feeling of, this was the dream I had that I always woke up from. And now I'm not waking up. It's so bizarre, but it's so cool. And it didn't really hit me that I was here, that I own it, that I have it, that my mom gets to live here. Until I think yesterday when I made that video. And then I made it and I posted it. And I just started sobbing in front of Natalie, which was kind of a... It was a vulnerable moment.

But yeah, sometimes when those surreal moments happen in your life, it's weird because you don't... It doesn't sink in because it seems so surreal. It's finally starting to feel real like that it's actually ours again and it's back in the family. But it's the coolest experience of my

life. And for all the people who have followed this story, I've seen your comments and your messages. And thanks for the support, obviously. And just as always, I'm so grateful for everyone who supports this show. But truly, without you guys, and without this show, and without the support of y'all, I wouldn't have been able to do this for my mom and my family. So just a big, big shout out and a thank you to all the other ViFi listeners out there and all your support. I can't thank you enough. I appreciate it.

And thank you for helping me live the greatest dream of my life. So that's the story. How did I do? How did I tell it? Was it good? It was good. That was amazing. Good work.

Did I ramble? That was a great story. No, it was actually, yeah. That was a hallmark movie. In your own words, you kept it tight. Yeah, it's been great. Natalie and I, and today, today is, well, Natalie and I don't really have a hard anniversary. Like every year we're like, what day in July are we going to celebrate our anniversary?

But today we were celebrating our three year anniversary. Oh, great. So happy anniversary to Natalie and I. She's currently sitting on the boat to getting some sun. Happy anniversary. That's awesome. Well, yeah, it's like an unofficial. So we wanted to celebrate before we left. Is this when you guys

fully, like I know we don't have a specific date. Is this anniversary when you defined things or when you met? Yeah. Okay. No, when we defined things. when you met yeah okay no when we define yeah so it's our third three-year anniversary of actually being boyfriending got it that makes sense it's the longest relationship of my life without without breaking up i was gonna say i was like what about the first one but that was on and off well we yeah yeah we never made it this long without without breaking up several times. So anyway,

we have an amazing episode for you. Scott Evans is with us. What a delightful person. Uh, one of the stars, the new Barbie movie, uh, before we get to Scott,

uh, Genevieve, uh, Allie, what, anything going on? Any updates in the pop culture role? I have a couple of just little Barbie things since,

you know, we're about to sit down with Scott, something I thought was fun. So the Barbie premiere was in LA on Sunday and a couple of just little Barbie things since, you know, we're about to sit down with Scott. Something I thought was fun. So the Barbie premiere. And I remember that Margot Robbie actually had an interview with Vogue back in May and said that Gal Gadot was actually considered for the role of Barbie, but wasn't available, but then actually served as sort of a template for the character. And Margot Robbie actually said, quote, Gal Gadot is Barbie energy. So I just kind of thought it was funny. I was like, I guess it's not the same as, you know, losing out on a role and then still having to go and like put on a brave face because clearly, you know, they consider her

didn't sound like scheduling worked out or maybe she wasn't interested in the role. But I just thought it was kind of fun to see her there for a project that she kind of helped design or work as a template for or maybe even could have starred in. But yeah, I mean, yeah. I mean, obviously, she didn't have to go to it. So, clearly, she has no animosity. And I think as movie fans, we love to hear of the roles

people almost got. Yeah. Especially when those movies turn out to be iconic and the people who are cast in those roles crush those roles. It's always kind of fascinating.

You know, like, Will Smith was originally supposed to be Neo in the Matrix. It was written, I think, I think it was written for Will Smith or he was certainly the first choice and he passed on it to do Wild Wild West. You know, that's always like a fun bit of information. Like imagine Will Smith as Neo instead of Keanu Reeves. It might've been just as amazing. I don't know. But like, it's kind of, you know,

with Keanu crushing that role, it's just kind of a fun kind of story to think about. I think Margot Robbie is the perfect Barbie. I haven't seen the movie yet. But Gal Gadot, do you think they would have dyed Gal's hair blonde? I mean, Barbie comes in a bunch of different hair.

Probably a really good way. But the character would have been blonde. Because like, main Barbie has blonde hair, really good wig. Yeah. But the character would have been blonde. Because like main Barbie has blonde hair, right? Yeah. Yeah. I think they would have made her blonde. Margot is just so Barbie. Well, and I thought it was interesting.

I saw another interview of Margot where she actually signed on as a producer. It feels like this movie's kind of had a lot of different iterations, potentially. I know for a while, like Amy Schumer was maybe going to be a part of it or play Barbie. And so it's had like a lot of different kind of directions and paths. But at one point, Margot signed on as a producer. Her production company was attached. Yeah. And they were hoping that Greta Gerwig would direct. And then they finally got Greta. And Margot was trying really hard for Greta not to feel pressured to making her Barbie. And she was like, I'm here for the film. Like if there's another person who's better, like you don't have to do it.

And Greta said, no, I really want you. And Margot was like, no, you don't have to say that. So it was kind of this like back and forth dance between the two of them. But the script was really written for Margot and Ryan. I heard that Ryan, when he read the script, it was the first script that he read once through and thought, yeah, I need to be in this. Absolutely. And then he went outside and he happened to find a Ken doll like smushed in the ground.

Oh, my God. I have to represent Ken. I am Ken. I'm so excited for the movie. Wild stuff. Well, we'll get more into all the behind the scenes of the Barbie movie with Scott Evans. Before we do, just a couple housekeeping notes. Don't forget, Vile Files Plus, always available.

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Welcome. Hi. Hey, thanks. How's your heart? Yeah. We like to ask all our guests this. How's my heart? We always lead. Hi. Welcome. Hi. Hey, thanks. How's your heart? We like to ask all our guests this. How's my heart? We always lead. We catch people off guard.

I feel like we should prep them. Am I going to start crying in the first five minutes of the podcast? Could you, actually? No, I could. Well, actually, no. That's why I don't get jobs. No, my heart's good, I think. I think it's good. I mean, it's all over the place constantly.

So it's no different today than it is normally. All over the place constantly. Yeah. I have a lot of love and a lot of hate. What do you hate? Who? Or what? What do you hate?

Let's start there. I don't want to get into it. What do I hate? Well, I don't really, I mean, I'm not a, can I say people? I hate people. Yeah. But I think when you say that, it's not just like, it's not all people, obviously, but just like, they're just, you know, they're just people.

Yeah. And they suck. Anything on your mind? I'm sure people hate me too, so it's all right. No. Oh yeah. There's gotta be some. There's gotta be a few.

People definitely hate me. Probably more than a few. Yeah. Before we recorded, you told me a story about you were on the bachelor bus. Yeah. Which, and then I actually saw you once. Uh-oh. I was at the Golden Globes. globes oh okay you went with your brother yes and i was with my friend demi yes i know demi well from television oh yeah and we were like just watching you guys and then i was trying to convince demi to go up and say hi

to you guys because she was like a big fat and then we just never did so we awkwardly stood there and like just that's actually funny because i feel like i actually now that you've brought this up i feel like i remember this and i i think i was saying to my brother well because if we go to things like that and we and we see people that i recognize that i know i'll say and he's he's not a he doesn't do the reality tv or or anything but i'll always explain i'll be like that person's on housewives that person's on this like should i go say hi he's like why i'm like i guess like yeah that's weird for me if i just do that but you should have said hi yeah well yeah i was trying to convince demi to do it were we whispering about people because that tends to be what we do well you were whispering about people

so we couldn't really tell the difference but also because we kind of crashed it oh good yeah well i had like i worked the red carpet for that event and then my friend was like working the show and then we kind of we weren't really supposed to be at the golden we snuck into the bar area which is kind of a fun spot outside section there was like yeah and everyone just kind of socializes there it was like it was really a fun experience yeah you sit there and you're like i guess i gotta have some more drinks and this this will be even more fun well congratulations on the upcoming new Barbie movie. Thank you so much.

Pretty exciting. Yeah, it's incredibly exciting. Yeah. I like every day. I'm just like, that's not my life. Is that my life? I guess so. Would you say this is the coolest job that you've booked?

Oh, for sure. For sure. Oh, for sure. This was, yeah, last year when I found out i mean i found out i had the audition for it and it was kind of one of those um okay yeah sure i'll tape for the barbie movie great and there was like another audition i had that i i put way more focus on because i was like i have more chance of getting that one which i don't even think i got a call back um but then when i got the movie i'm like this is this they know who they're casting like they're sure me and

i went to London. And when I got there, I was just convinced for the first couple of weeks, up until actually till the end, that I was just going to be fired. I'm like, they're going to realize this is a mistake. They made a mistake. And here I am. And we're three weeks out from the premiere. And I'm like, I think I'm in it.

No, I've seen it. I'm in it. You're like in the trailer. Yeah, you got it. You've seen it. Yeah. Yeah. What do you got it. You've seen it. Yeah. Yeah. What do you think?

It's exciting. What can fans expect? Like, is it, is it what, because honestly, like, I mean, I don't know, like, I'm not like a Barbie historian. I mean, I played Barbies with my sisters as a kid, you know, so that was fun. But like, it seems like it's like made for all ages. So that was fun. But it seems like it's made for all ages. I tell you, before this, I had no idea about the extent that the Barbie company, the Barbie character, everything goes to and has.

And the world that it exists in. And just even being around this, there's still stuff. When we put out a trailer, there are these people out there that are you know Barbie Barbie maniacs in a good way yeah not maniacs in a good way and they'll just like dissect the trailer and be pointing things out and I'm like oh wow yeah we did that

oh yeah I'm aware of that I promise so what's like the general premise like what can people look for the general premise that I'm allowed to say that's the other thing is for about a seems very they they and like secretive to a point where I was like I'm not gonna mess this up

my friends like some of my closest friends like where are you going I was like I can't tell you and I can't tell you why I just it's a God's like and things would leak and we every in the in the in the movie we'd be texting each other and we're like dude was it me could I have said it what did I say to like a friend or like an aunt? Like, who knows what happened?

But it was never me, as far as I'm concerned. But yes, the plot of the movie, it is, you know, Barbie and the Barbies and the Kens live in Barbie land. And it's funny, I can't really, they don't want to say much. But she, it's sort of like a journey of self-discovery. Things start to go awry in Barbie land and she has to travel to the real world to sort of figure it out. And while that sounds very like, OK, cool, can't wait to see it. It's just the very basic plot line, I guess. Did you, when you were shooting it, were you given the full script or were you given just

your part to read? When I got the offer, well when I got the audition it was just a scene and it was kind of a vague scene, it didn't really say anything and now looking back on it, the fact that it said Ken and we're all Kens, so I was like am I gonna be a Ken? This is a Ken? And I'm like

everybody's a Ken, great, but I'm a good Ken. Were there bad Kens too? Well but i'm a good can um no but then they're bad cans too well i mean a good can in terms of screen time 100 when i'm like scott's saying he's a can you guys that it's like oh they're all cans i'm like no but i actually i promise but then when they they i got the offer for the job i hadn't gotten a script yet and my my manager was sort of like trying to ask them, be like, you know,

Scott wants a script. And they're like, well, you know, he, we want him to accept it before reading it. And I was like, you guys,

there's nothing I'm going to read when I read this script. That's going to be like, no, I'm not doing that job. I just want to see it. Yeah. I'm saying yes. Yes.

I'm saying yes. And they sent it to me and I i had to be in london like three days after i got the offer and they were like can you be that well they said can you be there sunday i was like no i just needed two more days to breathe and get my life in order i guess because it was three months uh and then i got for three months yeah i was it was great i just just packed up my whole life and and disappeared for three months it was nice um but yeah i was reading i got the script and read it and was just kind of as i was reading it you know and i saw my name in it it was the way it was written to distinguish the kens and the barbies it would say like you

know ken uh simu ken kingsley ken judy ken scott and i just saw one day i was like that's gotta be scott that's not i'm not actually i don't actually have lines like what and so it got uh it got very real and I think the whole plane ride to London which is a long a long flight to just sit there and think about what you're going to do was very you know you asked me how my heart was that day it was exploding that's awesome yeah what were some of the highlights while filming? I mean, for three months, obviously a lot of, uh, very talented and very cool people are in the movie. Like, like, were there a lot of conversations, uh, in terms of like, just, I mean, like Barbie is such an iconic character in the movie. Just like, I feel like it was kind of almost like a meta experience kind of filming it and talking about how it affected people's childhoods and

things like that. For sure. For sure. That was like a lot of like the beginning stuff that we did when we were there was just sitting around a table. I got there and I didn't shoot my first thing for two and a half, three weeks because we were just there and talking about Barbie and talking about what the, what the characters mean and just kind of learning about this world that

Greta had created, which is, you know, just so it takes a, takes a little bit of, of getting used to and understanding and just hearing about what, you know, she feels and things. You're just like, oh man, I wish I was that smart. Like, I just wish I was that creative and smart, uh, sometimes, but then even little things like meeting with the costume designer, I was like, okay. And costume fittings, I always get very stressed about i'm like what am i gonna wear and i went in there and there was like nothing to really try on except uh get measured because they were creating the costumes they were like for me for each person i was like these are what does this mean like when it's over am i gonna get these they don't fit anybody else they're for me can i have

them um but it was just like it was did you get them well not yet it hasn't come out yet they got to keep it just up at the last minute and i'm not gonna get those i don't have any pull i got nothing um i did get one thing though that nobody else got but i'm i think it's supposed to i'm not supposed to tell or i took or i asked if i could take it and they allowed me it was the back to my chair like my cast chair oh that's cool but like everybody else i was like i had talked to one of the the one of the uh ads and i she was like let me let me let me see we're not supposed to and i was like please please please and i had made you know i was always on time and i was always ready to go when they needed me and so i i think i got a reward for it. Yeah, like best employee. 100%.

They couldn't say no to me. I was always there on time. I was never taking my time. They were like, oh, we need everybody on set. I would be there at the chairs waiting, and everybody would be strolling in. And I'm like, you guys heard that they wanted us, right? You're in.

Just get out here. Let's shoot something. Let's do something. Yeah, you were like the assistant. But yeah, just every other day was like somebody walking in that I'm like, I'm in a movie with you this is this is wild and everybody's just so normal what was one of those moments like what was will ferrell's definitely one of those moments hay mckinnon was one of those moments isa ray i and like now he says like a friend of mine and

i'll get like a text message that's like new text from isa ray and i'm like what hey oh yeah oh yeah i'm friends play cool i'm friends with these right yeah that's cool we're cool um but yeah it was it was literally and there was a i think there was moments at the chairs when you're you know waiting to go out and shoot and towards the end we have like a month left people start talking about what they're doing next and they're like oh what do people have lined up and everyone's kind of talking i'm like you mean this isn't your whole world right now like Like this is not the only thing. Like I was like lined up.

I'm not on your levels, but I, I'm just happy to be here. That's, that's great. You hadn't met Will Ferrell before that? Um, no,

and no, I don't think so. Not, not in a, in a professional or working setting. And I don't even know about that, like a party. And if I had,

it wouldn't have been. I always hear that he about that like a party and if I had it wouldn't have been I always hear that he's basically like in life kind of that same kind of boisterous comedic character he was very he was very uh you know you get engagement a conversation he'll get there and and you'll have fun but he was so professional to a way that like you expect people that when they get to like a certain level like the Margos the ryans to kind of be like i'm not gonna like if unless it's me shooting like you're gonna be when your coverage you're gonna be acting with a tennis ball like and somebody's gonna read the lines but they were there like even like when will ferrell would need to be there he's like i want

to be here for eyeline and if you like well actually you're making us laugh so without even trying so we don't want you there but he everybody was just so you know there to there to do it like there to be there for each other it was it was it was amazing and in terms of like meeting people in real life i had met margo before and i found out that it it kind of helped me get the part i guess i had met her at the i think an oscars party in like 2018 like with my brother and we were dancing and I, I like to, I like to dance, especially when I've had a few drinks.

She liked your moves. And Oh, Oh, we danced our asses off together. And it turned out that for this audition, when they were asking her, when I had taped and Greta wanted to, I have a meeting with me.

My managers were like, Hey, we just want to make sure like, you know, you, they, they know you can dance because Margo remembered from like the party and i was like and there's dancing in the movie so i'm like my my crazy partying antics finally got me a job that's pretty great i know

worked out what's your oh go ahead i think we're gonna ask the same question do you have a signature dance move do i have a signature dance like your goat like how do you fill the space on the dance floor uh very easily apparently i'll hurt people i'll uh no i used to um back in college i would know the dj and i would request a song that i knew nobody wanted and they would all leave the dance floor to be mine so what i would always have was it one in particular or would you mix it up no it was one in particular but i i guess i think i'm in love by jessica simpson it was like it it sampled Jack and Diane. Can we play it again? Can I?

Can we play it again? Every time you're near me, baby. Oh, baby. Brings me back, yeah. So good. That's your go-to. I guess. And it still is.

I mean, I'm not saying it was. It still is. And that's like a type of song. It's fast enough to dance, but slow enough that you kind of almost have to perform. Yeah, you're like, what am I doing? Well, even, and I'll put it on now. My friends will be like, okay. But then by the end, they're like, you're right.

This song is a bop. And it really, truly is. The bridge is incredible. What are you watching these days? I noticed that you, I see your, I've stalked your Instagram. Okay. Follow some Vanderpump people, follow some bachelor people.

I do. Is that because you watch these shows? I do. I am a, yeah, I was going to say my Instagram, I don't really post about it. No. But I, I did some smoothing. I am a bachelor watcher. I'll be watching on Monday and I am a very, I'm a Bravo watcher.

I'm a Vanderpump rules watcher for sure. Especially right now, man. What a spectacular time to be alive if you're not involved in all the shit. Yeah, what do you think about it? I mean, it's horrible. I mean, I'm thrilled because I get to watch it. But I know Ariana through some friends i'm you know danny

pellegrino who does everything i'm friends with him and so i've kind of been in the similar places with these people and i i know of them and stuff and just kind of watching it all unfold it feels kind of i feel like i've put in i've i've it's all been leading to this i put in so much so many so much work through seasons what like, like four, five, six, where things kind of just started being like, am I still watching this show? Why am I doing this? I feel weird.

And now it's just like... It's really paid off. I actually just got started. You did? Yeah. Well, because I had known, I think for me it was more having been on reality TV.

Yeah. It's produced. You kind of stay away from it a little bit and i you know i i met uh sheena and i met ariana a while back but i kind of knew them more casually and and then like i ran into jacks taylor a couple years ago and you know he has to take a picture i said no and then he got all mad and blocked me and i was like oh wow yeah yeah the blocking yeah wow i didn't even i don't even like i only found that out recently and people will know there are people that know every move everybody

made uh but so i never did and then obviously this all this came out actually it was kind of amanda who who put me on to it she started watching it she's doing the work she really sold it and then it's i think it's the best reality tv on tv ever ever and like and and and it's it almost like this season is starting to feel like there are moments i watch where i'm like there's no way that that that and it's not scripted and it's just not and they're saying these things that it's just perfect like maybe they planned it but like ariana just just delivering her whole you know almost like the hills i want to forgive you i want and i want to forget you like heidi speech to tom it was just

incredible oh and then it's the most recent moment of she had her shirt on it was real hot he doubled down was i couldn't believe it oh he like has spoken about it yeah so at tmz oh my god no ran into him i think is it the reporter again i don't know that same guy is the same reporter same guy it's just like same voice wow and i can't imagine because at first it would seem like they're all like calling this guy but i can't imagine tom was like i have something really great i can't wait to double down on this and i want to say he was like, just said that it had something to do with her being unenthusiastic and that would be

the equivalent of if he had sex and he just unzipped his pants instead of taking them all the way off. Okay, what's your point? That's what we understood it to be. We got it. And you said it and that was the problem. You said it.

I don't know But he thought, I don't know if he thought that we thought something different as if like, yeah, we know you called her lazy. You know, you, you like, you criticized her for like, what did he think we thought it was?

I need to look at tits at all times. That's exactly how we thought you meant it. Oh my goodness. Have you seen any footage of his concerts and stuff? I'm sure you've seen some of it. A friend of mine went on a, saw one a couple weeks ago and was posting a lot more than

I had seen before. It's just... Well, he's now dragging Schwartz. Schwartz is wrapped up, right? Isn't he saying he's done? Not necessarily that same interview, because they were asking about it. I think they were misquoted i think because he's now roasting schwartz for not having a house what did he what do you say because he does the schwartz's mom and the beginning line he started swapping out for schwartzy don't you miss when you had a lawn a homeowner's lawn tom

you're about to not have a house too well and who's left in his camp no one i mean i hope schwartz is out of his camp because like it really has ruined him too and not that he was been a guy has been a great guy through all of it not that he's always been an angel he's kind of had a fall from grace this season too but yeah man he's uh if you like, who are you on the Vanderpump cast? Oh my God. I think my friends years ago might say I was Jax. Um, really?

No, no, no, no, no. Jax is horrible. Um, but I'm great TV.

See, I would give myself Ariana. Like I just, I think I would. Um, but I little Katie sometimes I can be Katie. I'm a Katie. Okay.

I can be Katie. I mean, in terms of like getting high, I'm a Katie. Uh, and I like my edibles, but yeah, Katie, I just like Katie. Okay. I can be Katie. I mean, in terms of like getting high, I'm a Katie. And I like my edibles. But yeah, Katie, I just like Katie's no bullshit. And like, it's just like, you know, you said this and I'm going to say it back. And I can definitely be Tequila Katie for sure.

The scene of Katie this past season when she's combining a Celsius and Tito's. Oh, yeah. And she goes, don't judge me, butter. And then Lala comes in. She goes, I ordered Chick-fil-A. I was like, me? There it is. Do you follow the royal family stuff at all?

Like in terms of like. Well, I haven't. Allie does. But recently. So one thing about me, I started a Kate Middleton fan account when I was in middle school. It was extremely successful. And then I dropped off the face of the planet. But I am enjoying kind of the roast of Harry and Meghan.

You're not a big Meghan. Did you see that Spotify dropped archetypes? Yeah. I wanted to do a drag, have a drag named HIPAA Middleton back in the day. I did watch the docu-series. Was it like three parts of the Harry and Meghan? And you're still not a fan? I became less of a fan. Me too!

I don't want to like I see this like I get scared talking about this but like something about her just seems a little a little too performative I get that you have to be a little performative when you're like in that position but she's just seems very I don't know. I don't trust overly

polished people. Yeah she's very polished and I get that you're in the royal family but you're not anymore yeah but I actually I liked him less after seeing it because he's always has her back because he's just like no matter what is like no well it was more it was more of a 60 minute interview

and then the book it was just it was a bit whiny and you would never fall at anything before or you're just like I was more of a casual you know I just paid attention but I It was a bit whiny. And you would never fall at anything before? You're just like... I was more of a casual. I just paid attention. But I really got into the...

I watched the doc and I watched the 16-minute interview. Yeah. It was almost like a Vanderpump. I kind of caught on when it got real hot and popular. Who convinced you to do the Vanderpump? Was it easy convincing? Well, my pitch to people... Because I saw Vanderpump like and how did it was it easy convincing well my like pitch to people because like I saw Vanderpump as like a name for so long and nobody actually told me what

it was and had they just said the premise of this is that everyone in the kitchen is fucking each other and it is some of the messiest social dynamic you'll ever see and so put that in Hollywood and they're also aspiring like actors and models and you have a show if someone had just told me that I would have been in from the get-go that's what it is that's what it is well it's like my my boyfriend didn't watch any of this and we started dating at the beginning of the pandemic and at the beginning of the pandemic when you know that you couldn't we couldn't do anything so it was only just come over to my house or i'll come over to your house and i was like you don't watch the batch i was like please please watch like please just watch with me because if we're going to date,

like I'm going to watch my shows and it's either you do it with me or you do it without me. And so unfortunately the first season I got him on was Matt James. And that, and he was like, it was sort of like, are they always like this? And I was like,

is it this heavy? Do they all kiss with their eyes open? No. I just was like, all right, cool. I was like, queen Victoria.

We, we normally get a lot more queen victoria's and and so we've we've stuck with it but now that we've got bachelor paradise back he's he's he's hooked he's in but i've been begging him to watch vanderpump rules and he's like i'll watch it with you like this week and i'm like no from the beginning i need you from the beginning i started watching i just started watching season one oh so you were watching this stuff without knowing the the true i knew enough i went back and i would like right i was like in the middle of season 10 i went back and watched the reunion of season two because that's where

yeah because there's just so many important things from back then that you realize what like tom had said to jack's back like just like what they all i mean they've all done everything to each other but just and he's he'll try to like sit there watch uh one of these episodes one of these finale episodes with me and i'm just like can you can you go he's like this is crazy i'm like i know but if you've promised that you're gonna watch it from the beginning so let's just start i'll watch it with you it's really it's good it's riveting yeah i really i really got into it but part of it was uh my fiance and i natalie went to vegas on a like some outing trip or whatever and ariana and katie were there so we kind of started hanging out with them and natalie was telling me about it and that just kind of getting to know them made me more interested yeah and then shortly thereafter

amanda started watching it and then i was hooked yeah well and it's like also seeing like their evolutions just like what they used to wear and like do their hair like back in the day like now it's like yeah like sheena on the first season like giggling very different very different very different yeah it's like selling sunset yeah it's like their outfits from season one to now. It's like, yeah, now it's like, oh, like they don't look like outfits. I just remember even back in the day, like starting season one when I was in college of selling Sunset. And I don't know, being from the Midwest and growing up with like a mom with a very more traditional job. I thought season one, I was like, oh, these dresses are kind of short.

And now I'm like, they can't even sit. Well, now it's like, is she wearing pasties to a work event? And it's like, they're nude too. There's two slits in the dress. And they go up to her nipple? The slits are only the dress. And then it's a string. It's crazy.

They look like they're not allowed to move once they put the outfits on. Yeah. Well, they can't because they go to sit down and they're like, just let me get. All right. And then they talk. And it's like, if if they do they'll be popping out so are you big into selling sunset oh yeah oh yeah selling sunset do you miss christine as much as we do uh of course of course because it made good drama she i mean she i i i start i was like thinking i'm like she really became she like played into that but then i saw you know when i got to the end of

like the new episodes, it started playing season one again. And it was kind of on in the background. And I saw her, I was like, oh, she's always been like that. Oh, she said that she basically signed up to play that role. That was always her intended villain path. What did you make of Nicole and Chrishell drama? I don't know.

I feel like they're getting more and more into it, wanting to create the scenarios. Chrishell, I'm starting to like less. Is that bad? Are you guys all best friends with her? No, I mean, I've known Chrishell. I know Chrishell the most from the cast, but at least watching it,

she has some mean girl vibe. Oh, this season? Oh, the new stuff, yeah. I feel bad saying it but i guess but she's kind of crossed the on drugs thing yeah it she she oh yeah she she clearly it's like she knows she's the most popular and she's not gonna lose fans yeah and i hear that she can kind of be a bully yeah a little bit yeah well and i think that's and i think they're they need someone to be because that's like the point of the show it's like it's no fun anymore in person

lovely i've you know yeah and g is so cool i was gonna say have you met g what we had g on the show they were so low like everything you could want and more like seems so cool like g seems too cool for her like rock star i love kajal i love kaj love Chris Chow. But like G is just like, I don't know. G came in with sunglasses on and like a flannel hat over their shoulder. For rock star vibes, yeah. Oh wow. The Doc Martens

with like the straps. Yeah, I could never. Amanda and I were just like. But then they also have like kind of like the sunshine spark, which is I think like I was like,

oh, I really see them and Chris Chow together. Oh, that's good. Even that scene of them when G was like, are you having cheeky thoughts? Yeah, yeah, yeah. They're married, right? Baby, baby. Baby.

By the drum. Yeah, they kind of just got married in Vegas one day. Wow. How do you feel about the institution of marriage? I don't know. I mean, well, I do know. i've gone back and forth uh for a while like i had my built-in excuse where it's like no well i i why do i i don't care about i don't care about it because i can't get it any either way and they're like you're allowed to i'm like

i mean i'm oh yes equal rights equal rights but now i don't have my excuse um now my parents got divorced young, so it's like, you know, it gives you that, it makes you a little jaded. It gives you like the marriage ache. And like, I would like to, and I think my boyfriend wants to, and we talk about it. It's just not, unless I'm having children or I need tax breaks or health insurance. How could we make marriage more, like, appealing? I say this as an engaged man planning a wedding right now. But, like, yeah, more appealing. Because even... Like, specifically to, like, queer people?

Or just in general? I think just in general it's gotten less of a... I don't know what the appeal is. The really, yeah. Explain it to me and then I'll help make it more appealing. Because, yeah, I mean, like, Natalie literally is the only... I mean, I guess that's the great answer.

It was meeting my fiance. It was just like, you know what? It doesn't seem so bad now that I've met you. But like objectively the institution of marriage. Yeah. There's not a lot of upside. Well, because you can, Natalie, like you could still be with it forever. Yeah.

But why do you, why do you have to get married? If it is for the reason of like taxes and children and stuff like that. Like if I was having children, I would want to get married. I think I would want to have that. And I don't know why. It just feels like what I would want to do. I just, I also got my trust issues. So it's like, I don't.

Where do those come from? Life, people, everyone, humans. Heartbreak. Have I experienced it? Yeah. Yes. And I think the times that i can like pinpoint i think like i've a lot of the time it's my fault i'm at fault a lot of the time i think um for

things uh one of my biggest heartbreaks uh that i i think i caused my well i didn't cause myself but i kind of i look back on it now and a friend of mine jessica and i like will think about it and it's like the person wasn't even like, we weren't even like really dating. Like it wasn't even like a thing. And I like let it break my heart. Like it was, I lived in LA before I live here now this time.

And I left LA, I had to get out of town. And like, we weren't even together. So it's like, I can, I can be emotional. You had a heartbreak where you had to like,

abandon life. I had to leave. It was, I couldn't see this person and we had never dated. Like we weren't even together. I was just in love with him and he was, we were like, it was a thing. How did that happen?

How old were you? No, too old. This should have been a little more, should have been a little more mature. Like 20, 21. Oh, that's not that old. That's a lot. All right.

Yeah. I've said some crazy things out loud over heartbreak. Yeah. And I was 23, 24. Yeah. I can be emotional. Yeah. And how did you deal with that?

How did you get over that? I left town. Yeah. But at some point you must have like come back to earth and like, cause now you're talking about like, we weren't even dating. Yeah. You were able to like see the forest through the trees. What's, what I'm,

I think I find very lucky for me is that I've kept journals since I was like 16 years old. So I will go back. I still have them now. And so when I think about that, I'm like, oh, I was so sad. And I'll go read my journal being like,

oh my God, what a psycho, what a psycho. So I'm able to go back and have a look at what the actual, instead of like remembering it a certain way, go back and read the actual scenario and what was actually going on and be like, okay,

so yeah, I don't, I don't journal, but I have found old, old breakup love letters I wrote back in college a while back. And it's, it's vulnerable. Yeah.

Yeah. The best is, I don't know how I, what, what we all were thinking on facebook in like 2007 8 9 i'll get these on this day statuses that it's just like if it's not avril lavigne quotes it's just like it's just waiting for something anything at all like you know just like the most dramatic and of course it'll be like well that ended before it started and i'm like you were just putting this

stuff on facebook and i'll check my journals and see what it coincides with. And I'm like, oh, yeah, that guy was an asshole. He did cheat on me. You know, it is wild. I'll get I'll see flashbacks that my sister's posted with her boyfriend, who's now her husband when they were in high school. And I'll send them screenshots to be like, y'all really just put it out there. Everything.

Everything. Oh, my goodness. Well, everything. And even like my I have two nephews and her niece and like my sister will like post things about them like about their lives and everything and i'm like this is uh this is crazy like just like their secrets and like pictures of them and i just i thank god that there was not uh better uh or you i don't even know if you were able to record video on my flip phones in college but but I just thank God that iPhones were not around

when I was in college. Yeah. I think you were at some point. I think there were cameras. Cameras, but it was bad. It was bad. Yeah. I, thank God.

It was, you know, I had like a digital camera, but we never recorded. Oh, it would have been bad. So I feel lucky. And then you want to share now? Well, no. I mean, listen mean i already have enough shit out there i don't need any more uh yeah i i don't know i don't know why why like why does

like the facebook and the instagrams like have those memories to make you feel bad yeah right because it's like i scroll back three weeks things i post on the internet i'm like i don't know horrible yeah oh sometimes that was funny yeah the date will be a little too recent. It'll be like 2015. I'm like, you, you posted that. No. To the world. I feel like it's a show of force on like the apps part. Like they're like, look at this.

There's more where that came from. We control you. We know what you did. We know exactly what you did. We have very comprehensive records of it. Maybe that's like the key, right? Like anytime we are in the moment feeling like this like uh thirst of validation because it's that's usually when we do the dumbest shit it's like when we we we were pining for

either some individual or just in general to like have someone just make us feel special oh absolutely and so whenever you're feeling in the moment just go online and look at your previous shit and and maybe it'll offer you some like pause yeah or help yeah exactly some therapy well that was like also back in the day what you were able to do is and what i find that i did do is you it's like kind of fishing like you facebook back in the day was like vague book you'd just be like like passive aggressive facebook status as i always would do it a little like let the person know like who they'll they'll see it or just be like man i'm not that i did this people people did i've heard uh being like man what it's a rainy night what a perfect night for like a movie and a cuddle buddy too bad no one's around and then like waiting for people to comment on it and seeing who

does and then be like oh i like him want to come over not that i would ever do that but some of them you go back and there's zero like zero comments and you're like well i well poor engagement i didn't remove it and i didn't delete the status it's still there for years still nothing great did you ever do the truth is like like this post for a truth is no no that had a show called on my high school it was like it was like middle school high school you would like post a status to me like like this for a truth is and then everybody who commented on it you would comment on there I'll be like truth is I don't know you so

well but I wish I did truth is I love your hair I mean like those would be the nice ones we're volleyball besties we're some of the like meaner ones I don't think we did mean. I went to an all-girls school. It was too small for all.

Yeah, I don't know that I personally, I was too much of a coward. Wasn't there like a secret? There was an anonymous one and that's I think when some people got a little more.

Oh, form spring? Well, it was, no, something literally called like secrets where you could just post something and it would be like in your location or something

and I just remember living here in 2005 and it caused some drama because somebody posted a secret about a friend. Oh no. Who we all found out. Drama. Internet. It's only getting worse.

Oh yeah, it's horrible. But like, did you say that? Like when are kids gonna start suing their parents for all the kid content that they got posted? Cause that's gonna, that's definitely gonna happen's definitely going to happen it's going to happen and it's going to like some they're going to break precedent and then it's just like their business well and there's nothing like even like now like looking back on like fun videos when i was a kid there's only like a few and they're like old school now it's just like every day of my life you posted me eating my dinner mom like every single video.

Throwing a fan. Yeah, everything. Look at how bratty my child is. No, don't. Now I'm trying to work as a lawyer. What was a favorite childhood memory of yours? Jeez, like a specific one? I don't know.

I don't know. My family uh, I don't know. We, uh, my family, my family was, uh, pretty obsessed with each other. Like in terms of, uh, if, when we would do things on the weekend, it wouldn't be hanging out with friends. It wouldn't be like having sleepovers. My brother, my mother would be like, you guys can each invite a friend over and, or have invite a friend to sleep over. And Chris and I would be like, Chris, do you want to sleep over?

And like, we would, you know, share to have a sleepover with each other and not invite friends and so we did a lot of um like weekend trips to go skiing and we were a super super tight family and i think those are like those are the greatest memories so it's you chris and then you have a sister older sister chris me younger sister oh four of you yeah pretty pretty sizable i mean yeah it's a good group. Not 11 like mine, but. You're one of 11? I am. Where do you fall?

I'm the second oldest. Okay. But four is large. Yeah, but it's not 11. No, but like no one's ever. God, how did you guys, did you guys take trips? Like, did you guys do anything? Could you go to dinner?

Yeah, what was the car? You need to reserve the whole restaurant? Yeah, how did you commute anywhere? A 15-passenger van? It's like the Duggars. At one point, there was a big van, and it was gray and red, and that lasted a little bit. Usually, it was like a two-car system to church. Second oldest.

Are you just sending happy birthday texts all like all year round for like family family members i mean like a few times a year there's a group text that um you know do you know everybody's birthday yes that's good i just don't know their ages because that changed that's hard yeah yeah yeah and it's math it's like how old are you these days but like another birthday yeah and the general the general age yeah yeah but you know we didn't take a lot of family trips because couldn't afford that i traveled like through like athletics and sports when i was in like middle school or in high school uh and then uh yeah i mean as a kid like our like my favorite place was my actually my grandfather's lake house that they ended up selling when i was nine but i just bought it back for my

mom amazing yeah yeah so that was that's kind of cool that's awesome yeah i close well when this cut comes out i would have closed but i closed this friday on that's so exciting to my mom so yeah wow yeah does she know she knows now yeah so but yeah they sold it 30 years ago that's so cool i just bought it back my and my grandfather built it i'm very jealous yeah i love that story yeah i'm pretty excited yeah uh i have to like leave town for a show and then i'm coming back and i'm gonna go up there and hang out like all the siblings know and everybody yeah everyone knows but all because it's only it's like the three oldest kids my oldest sister jessica and my one after maria like for us it was like nirvana like heaven on earth yeah but like there's 11

of us some of the kids they don't get never even got to no they were they had been sold like for 10 years by the time they were born oh wow like oh cool lake house but for uh for some of us it's like really a big deal wow how was the youngest uh 17 yeah you're like i don't know something around there i'm six months closer in age to my dad than i am to my youngest sister wow the youngest just graduated high school and they did like the high school did a whole thing for my parents. Like they're like, thank you for keeping us open. Well, no, it was like 30.

I think for 30 some years they had one of us at the high school. Wow. They just, you know, Bella just. Oh, is your mother just going to sleep? Bella just finally graduated. Bella graduated high school, just going to sleep. what about kids for you are you having kids definitely 11 no definitely not 11 yeah but hopefully more than one you know we'll see that's exciting knock on knock on wood but yeah are you i go back and forth i my my my my current boyfriend definitely wants

kids what's what's the pros and cons for you it's just first of all i mean this i don't know it sucks that i'm like is this cliche but the world sucks like i i i think about i mean i don't want to get too serious but things that i see my older sister have to deal with like her kids like coming home and talking about active shooter drills stuff like that it's like i don't want to i i'm a very i will be the worst helicopter parent i won't let them go to school i will homeschool i just it's too stressful it's too much and i also like napping i also like there's that but taking vacations when i want to hear me out in the state of the world like people used to build bomb shelters in their basement in the 60s sure you know but we're not in the 60s we got internet we know what's going on yeah but like the great depression that sucked too you know there's yeah

because they couldn't talk to they didn't know what was going on we're we are all connected we know what's going on we know how to fix it and we don't i am afraid like i'm just more afraid as a parent of the internet like how can you parent your kid when even if you have like rules like my because like my parents were pretty strict when I was younger, you know, they like, you know, I used to get teased about like, what's that rated? And my friends would be like, it's rated and you can't watch it, you know, like shit like that. You know, and then I'd sneak over my friend's house and watch like Jean-Claude Van Damme and Steven Seagal movies. Oh yeah, the best. Yeah. Claude Van Damme and Steven Seagal movies. Oh yeah, the best.

But even if you are a parent that has some pretty strict rules about phone access, unless you not let them out of... Are you the parent that doesn't let them have a phone and all their friends do? And then they turn and they don't have friends because they can't get in touch with them.

It's tough. It is a lot. Well, that's just it. It's like my sister's going through that about like, well, they just got their first cell phone but they can't do this. And almost, they're not gonna listen to this but like kids you you're still gonna do things you're still gonna be on tiktok and like posting things that

i'm like don't post that like i i i'm warning you i promise you guys are gonna thank me later it's just uh it's and and i think about the fact that like even to this day i'm almost 40 years old and i if i if i call my mother a little too late at night or something and she picks up like what's going on? Are you OK? Like it is. You're just worried for the rest of your life. I can't I can't have that. Are you a warrior? Yes. I like my hair. I like, you know, my my heart working normally. Is there like one thing where like my boyfriend was like, oh, my God, the first time I would explain space to a kid would like or is there like one experience where like if you were to have children like would particularly excite you like getting to introduce a human to something? I think I think the, you know, the emotional side of me, the one that keeps the journals is anything that happened in a journal about like my dad never loved me, even though he did.

But, you know anything like that like the riding the bikes and i love all that kind of dramatic stuff but then i think about also that's not it's like i love being an uncle i get to do all that fun stuff with my niece and my nephews and i get to have the fun and i've you know taught my taught my little sister to ride a bike stuff like that and then at the end of the day, I get to give them back and I get to go on a trip and go to bed and lay in bed and take an edible and just, you know, not worry about

who didn't do their homework. You're making me worried, Scott. No, you're going to be great. Listen. Well, listen, I just, and I'm also extremely controlling and I really, I the idea Steve's going to listen to this, like the, the thought of having to like, it's already when we're, you know, making decisions together. I'm

always, I'm already just like, man, I have to make all my decisions with someone. I know you don't have to, but like for my weekend plans, what are we doing? I don't, the we thing. And then with kids, I have to, I have to decide on everything. We're deciding on a paint color for a wall right now. This, it's not just like, I'll compromise. This is a human. I'm raising a child. I'm not going to compromise. If I want something done a certain way,

like this is how I believe. You could tell me what you want, but like, let's discuss it. But it's going to be a hard compromise. It's not like, okay, we'll go with the light blue. Have you talked about parenting styles with Steve? No, we haven't. But I bet we're going to now. What,

what, what's the room are you painting in the house? Uh, a wall. He, we just moved in together, uh, recently.

Congrats. How do you feel about, is that your first live in relationship? I've lived with one before, uh, but it was, it was a first and I was i'm difficult and i can admit that you're self-aware uh very uh i'm difficult and it was sort of like uh it was my

space that he was moving into and he didn't have much uh he had just moved to la and it was it was too soon um and it was uh you know 10 year age difference and but it was, it was too soon. And there's a 10 year age difference. And, but it was, he's a great guy and we, it just didn't work out. But Steve has moved in to my place, but we made a deal to like,

we, we got new furniture and like, cause he had a one bedroom apartment, but he, his, his official moved. He moved in October. And then in April,

all of his stuff had to come out because he kept his old place for working from home because i'm home and i didn't it's a one bedroom and i'm like i don't want you working here when i'm here watching vanderpump rules uh obviously but he got coveted super bad uh at the end of march when he had to be out of his apartment his old place and so i had to do it all on my own, like go through everything and pack everything. And he's, I found out just as much of a hoarder as I am. And so it was, I have trouble throwing things out. I'm the opposite.

So I'm always get fascinated when people. Well, I've gotten better when we had to combine stuff and had to make space. I just got to a point where I was like, throw, throw. I'm like getting a lot better. But what are you you what's your favorite thing to hang on to is it clothes kitchen stuff kitchen stuff kitchen stuff like what everything i love everything in the kitchen i love everything every when we go and any trip we take when i get i get bowls i get silverware i get bowls i get a lot of. Bowls. I love bowls.

I get bowls. I get a lot of bowls. I also think there's like, for me at least, because I identify in a very similar way, I feel like there's a sentimentality to it. Yeah. Of like, you're just like you, it's very easy to kind of like attach a meaning or like some kind of like gushy something to it. And then you're just like, oh, this thing connects me to this other person. Yeah, I don't connect.

I don't connect i don't connect to like like if i'm getting rid of sheets i'll throw my sheets out like whatever but i just i like uh like that kind of stuff but he he likes everything like he kept everything but you know there were certain things jokes on you that i did throw out without his approval i told him i would approve of everything i love throwing things away it feels great now it does but then it's like i got to a point but then even trying to get rid of stuff i was texting things away it feels great now it does but then it's like i got to a point but then even trying to get rid of stuff i was texting all my friends i was like does anybody need this like it was like i'll show you pictures i had like full yard sales in my living room for

like friends that i knew that i just moved there and i and everybody's just like no i don't need a set of like three wine glasses that say like like a mexican restaurant's name from when you went to it in 2005 and i'm like are you sure only one of them has a crank you know so i i think i got better but it's hard but yes we uh we've moved in now and i started collecting uh we would buy one of those starbucks mugs from every city oh are you my boyfriend because he loves those he loves them he had about 25 thermoses in a cabinet i sent him a picture i was like do we need all these do you need all these thermoses and he's just like well let me look at them i was like well well no there's like six of the same one so i'll let you look at one of those since he's going to be listening what's

the thing that most excites you about moving in with steve uh i think not having to to talk about like you know it's well i mean it logistically just kind of being like we were in the same place as opposed to him having to drive back and forth to his place i like have his his dog is now my dog permanently like in there but he's he helps me he helps keep me, keeps me grounded because I can be crazy and I can be all over the place and I can be a nightmare. And I think having him there helps me, uh, not get away with things as easily. Who do you go to for like relationship advice? Like when you were like struggling and journaling emotionally, like who is your, like you're pretty close with your family. It sister your brother yeah definitely my my family um back back in the

day when i was closeted and journaling and in like high school and college nobody it was just like this is it i gotta deal with this on my own um but now it's relationship advice tends to be uh my brother my sister who gives better relationship advice me no i know that's the problem we're gonna put the test in a few minutes oh jesus christ um i don't know i i uh it's so different because my sister's been married you know almost 15 years and we've all we all have very different uh relationship histories and it's also dating a man is very different i think than a man and a woman dating so who knows and all of my friends are single so it's like i can't get much advice there when your brother obviously obviously very well known and he was

single for a while you know eligible but you know right by many people's standards uh was he pretty close to the vest when it came to relationships even with the family or you know now that he's he's in a pretty serious relationship now it seems like it's it's tough to back with with everything it's the world people can ruin things pretty quickly sure all it takes is and and people are it's it's only you know it's not getting better it's only getting worse and and the way people can be it can make it pretty hard to date someone like that because you think like oh this is you know i'm just dating a person he's a guy and then all of a sudden it's it's article after article after article after post after tag after tag for everybody just being like you are a piece of crap

so like these the to anybody he's tried to date and just destroying them and telling them they said it's like you know you can only take that for so long and it it makes relationships kind of hard for him i think so like the the media would be critical of the people he'd be not media media but also like people on just on Twitter on. Is it because sometimes like people who in their head feel like they are eligible to date him and they're like, we will tear her down. I can't tell you how many how many messages and things like it tagged in on the daily. Just being like, if your brother just meets me, we are going to be in love. And they're like a 70 year old woman. And it's like, okay,

maybe, I don't know. I don't, I don't know much about you, but I am not Patty Stanger. Like I'm not, I'm not millionaire. Oh man.

Yeah. I guess on like on the smallest of levels. Yeah. Now he has a doubt. I can only imagine from your brother's standpoint, the people who's mad, like just, yeah, they just,

oh yeah. And everybody's always just commenting, being like, Hey brother-in and i'm just like oh you guys maybe i mean if you want to stand out at least come up with some original material are you pretty protective of your brother of course you have to be it's just there's just too much it's it and it's you know it's been like a slow burn over the years he's been it's not like all of a sudden he catapults to fame and sure it's we've been experiencing and we've watched the internet happen. Like Twitter wasn't around when he first started making movies. And so just being able to,

uh, see it all kind of what, what can happen and what it's, it's, um, it can be a dark place and people, you know, people can get very bold with the things they think are appropriate.

But he seems like he's in a pretty happy relationship now yeah i think uh yeah yeah yeah yeah and you you approve i approve yeah i i mean i always i always he'll only my my family and my friends will only know if if i approve i won't say anything like obviously i'm not going to be like, yeah, here's my stamp of approval. But like, if I don't approve, they'll know. You'll speak now. You will not. Oh, I will not.

I will not wait. You're like, I will not be your best man. Well, I performed my older sister and my younger sister's wedding ceremonies. So if I had something to say then I'd be able to say it very easily. You get to the part where it's like, if anyone objects, you're like, it's actually me. It's me. And I only wanted to do it here for the drama when you say performed what do you mean i mean i why i officiated i was

ordained and i performed their ceremonies i also sang at both of their weddings which was which was like are you guys you you realize this is a mistake right this is people aren't gonna remember you from this day. My older sister's wedding, I like, I was speaking and I was like, and now we have a brief musical interlude from me. And like, I walked over to the piano. I sang, I came back. I was like, thank you, me.

You were great. Moving on. You had your full like alphabet. It's me moment. Oh, for real. Exactly. And then my little sister's wedding, I was like, here we are again, everybody. You know, same people.

Act two. Just trying to make it funnier, just trying to make it, but they give me free reign. They don't ask to see what I'm going to say, and it's not like dearly beloved. It's like, hey, girls and boys, like, let's fucking do this.

Oh, yeah. I swore at my older sister's wedding, I didn't really know the guy she was marrying, like, family, like, very well. They didn't know me very well, and I don't think they were prepared. You know know my one of my first jokes i think i it wasn't in a church so i didn't feel as bad but i think i didn't say a great word and you know you just see half the crowd dying laughing and the other half like who is this guy like who is this

who is our son marrying what family is this did you grow up religious uh we grew up i went to church i did like ccd and classes and everything but but but then my junior year when you needed to get like confirmed i was sort of like you know in my mind i was like i don't believe in this but in my mind i was like i'm so gay like it's not i don't want to be a part of this. CCD. We used to call it Children's City Dump. Central City Dump. Yeah, one of those. Yeah, one of those. Yeah, take that, CCD. I would just write every answer I had to say God.

It was just such a crazy thing every Sunday. They give you homework, but it never really mattered. You're like, I wish I would have. Reading passages in the book with these cartoon drawings of Jesus. Just like white guy. Every Tuesday after school. Yeah, for real it was brutal

that's so crazy alright are we ready to get some relationship advice Scott shoot yes I guess that'd be great deep breaths

sweating the wedding I'm scared wedding wedding drama thank god because we have an officiant yes

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That's blueland.com, B-L-U-E-L-A-N-D.com slash V-I-A-L-L to get 15% off. That's blueland.com, B-L-U-E-L-A-N-D.com slash V-I-A-L-L to get 15% off. That's blueland.com slash V-I-A-L-L for 15% off. How's it going? Good. My name is Anne and I'm 27 years old. How can we help Anne? So one of my bridesmaids cheated on my brother and I'm not sure if I should fire her as my bridesmaid. Okay. Why wouldn't you fire her?

Well, see, that's my initial reaction is to fire her. But I've got a lot of negative feedback from my family, namely my mom, who's a little bit too involved in the situation. So wait, let me, if I understand you, mom, your mom, also mother of your brother, whose girlfriend, right? Or fiance. It's girlfriend. Girlfriend cheated on her son. Yes. Also one of your maid of honors and mom thinks it's a bad idea to fire her. Yes. What's the relationship between you and the bridesmaid? Is it,

is she a bridesmaid because she was your brother's girlfriend or are you guys friends? So initially mom kind of talked me into having her as a bride. Why is mom obsessed with her? I know this, I know this, I know this mother, i know this i know this i know this mother i know this mother like yeah um so it's a little bit complicated on my mom's end i see where she's coming from she's coming from a very protective stance for my brother because he decided

to stay with her i was gonna say how long have they been together and are they still together they're five they've been together five years. So. Okay. So let's. Okay. So they decided to stay together. How did this get found out?

So we recently found out that the alleged cheating has apparently been going on since March. Oh, so it's not a one-time deal. No. No. And there's a, apparently, I did not not know this so this is my younger brother we're about four years apart we just recently started getting closer as we're you know kind of growing up um so i did not know any of this but apparently this is something that has been happening since they've been dating in fact whenever they got together it was because she cheated on her current partner with my brother well i actually totally get it from mom's pov and i guess brother's pov if he's choosing to stay with her you know like people have and and can work through infidelity i mean

it's difficult it's hard there's a uphill battle but like it is possible and like under that kind of lens and premise like i can see why actually it's probably something your brother would right like hey i'm gonna stay with her like why why is she out then you're kind of outing her it becomes even more of a thing i get all that but like if you're saying that she's just been she's just like a serial cheater and has been cheating on him kind of since the inception of their relationship. Yeah. So it's I think the way that my brother looks at it is that she like when they got together, it was that, you know, he saved her from this bad, toxic relationship. So he's kind of got this Tom Sandoval. Yeah. he's kind of got is this tom sandoval yeah he's got this hero complex with her you know like i'm i'm gonna save her and like wanting to change so he kind of justified being the other man

by telling himself that she was in a shitty relationship yes yeah and um when she was confronted this last time she has got it so twisted around to him that she was the victim somehow that, you know, she didn't want to say no. She doesn't know how to set boundaries. You know, she didn't actually physically cheat, but she emotionally cheated. And somehow that's better. So but did did it's not necessarily better, but there are is a difference. I mean, like, like yeah there's a difference you know i mean as much as like emotional cheating might hurt like i think i'd it's just like that's

that's better than you fucking someone i feel like and are we sure like this this time she got caught like are there how did she get caught there other times so um there have been several times she this is not the first time that she's been quote unquote caught, especially not by members of our family. So this time how she got caught is my brother who's dating her is actually a twin and his twin girlfriend and her were very close and very close friends. You know how that works. Right. And so she found out from a mutual friend that they had went to high school with because the guy that she was talking to, who was her ex, is fucking this other girl. Wow. So out of jealousy, told him or told her about it.

And then she came to me and was concerned and was like, I found out this stuff. I don't know if it's true. Based on past things that have happened, she's like, I'm inclined to believe that it is true. What should I do? And I told her to confront the other bridesmaid about it and to talk to her and that my brother has the right to know. I would want to know if it were me. So what were the actual specific accusations in this current cheating scandal? Since March, apparently he reached out to her,

DMed her on Instagram or something like that. And she answered, not so bad. And then that escalated to texting while my brother is away at work they live together apparently she texted him and told him don't text me during these hours don't text me on the weekends don't call me during these times because he's home and then they started hanging out in person apparently like watching tv together cuddling on the couch together she swears that it didn't escalate physically further than that do you believe her but i don't believe yeah you don't believe but even still it's like

it's still pretty bad even without it starting with the whole don't text me during certain hours you are it's not it's not it doesn't become innocent anymore that means you know what you're doing why is your brother choosing to stay with her and i don't mean that like retort like it's like if he's gonna stay with her what are they doing as a couple to you know and it might be true like it's not necessarily making herself to be a victim like she might literally be bad at setting boundaries who knows what's going on with her what trauma or you know again not excuse but what is her reason for having this type of behavior there is a reason not an excuse but like there's there's some you know, again, not excuse, but what is her reason for having this type of behavior? There is a reason, not an excuse, but like there's there's some, you know, there's some shit that she clearly hasn't dealt with that makes her do shit like that. And it's not going to change unless she does something to change it.

And and promises of it'll never happen again aren't don't usually work. So what what is she doing? Oh, there's definitely things that have happened. And she definitely, from what I've gotten to know her, cause we have, you know, spent a lot of time together. She is terrible at setting boundaries and saying no. So that part I know is true. Yeah. And I do know about like some family things that have happened between her and her parents and things that you know make sense with that so but see i don't feel like i think that makes it makes sense as to why it's happening i don't

feel like it justifies no it definitely doesn't justify but are like are so is your brother are they getting into therapy is she in therapy are they in therapy like what she is in and out of she's in and out of therapy a lot she's not in therapy right now um my brother is very against therapy which breaks my heart because i'm a therapist in training so So there's that. Why is he so against it? I think he has so much pride. He won't even talk to me about it, honestly. But from what I gather from other people that he's talked to about it, he's just so against talking about his emotions, which already... So is he just staying with her out of embarrassment basically like he would rather

stay with her and hope that no one finds out and pretend it didn't happen rather than like face the music because like why is he staying with her i definitely think that is a huge part of it and that's something that i've talked to about with my fiance i also think that a big part of it is that this is his first relationship and he genuinely thinks that he's in love with her how old is he he is uh 23 years old okay and they've been together five years so they got together right out of high school oh yeah that first one's a tough one to get over yeah but if so have you really sat down with him or her and had a conversation about this topic i have had a conversation with her before in the past because like i said this has happened before yeah and the situation was a bit worse like she stayed the night at a different guy's house and everything and like you know was really emotionally cheating on him

again denying physical cheating but staying the night at some guy's house is you know there's there's no way that's something that slipped out or in in those situations there's no way that's not gonna lie slipped out or in in those situations there's no way there's this no way is there any part of him that's staying together with her uh for the wedding like for you to make sure that there's no drama because it's there's there's trouble because i know that bridesmaids and dresses and all the plans and everything can be numbers i mean intense thing yeah it's numbers You already have the trust me. I've watched two weddings get planned by pretty crazy people. This is going to sound so bad.

I love my brother, but he's, he's not thinking about me. Okay. Yeah. That's not hard to believe. I mean, that's which is understandable. He's 23. His, this is probably rocking. But as your mom.

Yeah. Oh yeah. She's not thinking about me. She's thinking about the status quo. Yeah. What does your gut tell you? What do you think is the right thing to do? You know, everything aside, you know, you seem like a selfless person. You don't you honestly don't even seem like you're all that concerned about like you're not even calling in being like, I don't want to fuck up my wedding. You're calling in, obviously, because you're more concerned about your brother. You kind of want to fuck up my wedding. You're, you're calling in obviously because you're more concerned about your brother. You, you, you kind of want to fuck up the wedding

a little bit, which I kind of enjoy, you know, a little chaos. But, um, what do you think is the right thing to do? Like you actually have a little bit of power here as the bride. Like it's like, you're in a, so I'm curious, what do you, what are, what are your options as you see them? Yeah. So this is where my dilemma comes in, right? Because like I can wear that therapist hat and I can recognize that, you know, I empower my clients to follow their gut. And sometimes that means leaning into your own self-empowerment and setting your own boundaries, which would mean taking her out of the wedding because I don't like that. There's no accountability.

Yeah. Yeah. But then I wonder how much of that is actually my own emotions getting in the way because, because he's not holding her accountable. My family certainly is not holding her accountable. No one's holding her accountable. Do I want to hold her accountable because I'm mad at her,

you know? Well well only you can decide that but like there's also i mean you like this is going to happen again i don't see how this doesn't happen again like she's and then she's in your pictures for forever well that's that's a whole nother uh level because you're right your brother's not ending up with this person i'm gonna get i mean let's let's hope not like again like you know let's hope he doesn't knock her up or or or anything like that in the near future but

yeah I mean there's a good chance short of some something like that happening that she is going to be out of the picture I mean eventually he's going to wake up but like it's a terrible thing to be cheated on and you feel all this incredible embarrassment. So you haven't really talked to your brother about this yet?

No, I absolutely have. He won't take my calls, but we've had a text conversation about it. I felt like I was just talking to a brick wall, but essentially I let him know that I care and I love him, you know, that I'm here for him if he needs anything. I explained, you know, all the things that I noticed with her, like all of the things that I, you know, noticed that she was saying that seemed like gaslighting towards him and like pointing out that this is something that has happened before. And it just seems to go in one ear and out the other. The only thing he keeps saying to me is, we're going to work it out. It's going to be fine.

I'm asking her the tough questions. I'm like, what tough questions have you asked her? Pressing him on that. And he's like, well, I asked her why. She said she was lonely. She wanted a friend. He was reaching out and just kind kind of gave what's going to change is the why he why she did it is i guess less important i mean i mean i'm sure people want

their answers but how how is this going to stop from happening in the future because this person who's not good at setting boundaries who from occasionally from time to time seeks out validation outside of her relationship because your brother's preoccupied with whatever the fuck as we all get preoccupied with life. And as relationships have its ups and downs and we get bored and complacent in relationships and it's just like, eh, a compliment from my partner is just less thrilling today than it was yesterday. So I need to make sure I still got it and go out in the world.

She's just going to feel that again. make sure I still got it and go out in the world. She's just, she's just going to feel that again. And it's going to take her, you know, having the tools and the self-awareness and the therapy or whatever it is to say, okay,

I'm being triggered. Something inside me is, as I feel that void where in the past I would seek out that validation through others. And what's going to in the future, make her go, no, I can't do that i'm in

a committed relationship or yada yada and there's there's no sign that she has as that is on that path so it's almost certainly going to happen again the next time because getting caught doesn't she's been caught yeah you know like it's not even getting caught that stops stop stops her from doing it yeah no i totally agree with you i mean and you're right know, like it's not even getting caught that stops her from doing it. Yeah, no, I totally agree with you. I mean, and you're right on the money. It's not going to stop. And I think we like, and it's not just me working on it.

Like we've all, I have a lot of siblings, by the way. There are like nine of us. Oh yeah. Good for you. We'll get for your parents. We've all like, like you know had our turn in trying to talk to him and like pointing that out and it's just he's not changing his mind okay well could you basically weaponize your wedding against him i mean i guess what i'm saying is he

won't take your calls they you could be like listen i'm thinking about taking so and so out of the wedding but before you do like i'd like to talk to you both and figure it out because it is your wedding you ultimately get to decide i don't i think you need to decide for yourself i wouldn't listen to mom or your brother and i think you have the ability to say well if you guys want to be in the wedding i i need reassurances that you guys are doing the the right thing right you know so maybe you could if your brother's not taking your calls and you could say hey just to say i'm because you are i'm honestly thinking about removing so and so from the wedding i just don't i don't feel right about this i don't know what's going to happen with you two i ultimately i support you as your sister but

like i don't need so and so in all and all my wedding photos, knowing that she's done this to you. And like, you might wake up in a year and feel differently about her. So before I can make a decision, I would want to sit down with both of you. So I can be, feel more comfortable about like, you know, keeping her in. And I just need to know what you guys are doing about it. And maybe you can, you know, throw out, you know, your therapy training in the, in the meantime. I actually like that advice. And that's something that I definitely have considered doing, especially when we get closer to the wedding. I think the feedback that I've received from my dad, who's, you know, not as involved as my mom is like, sit on it,

think on it. Cause maybe they'll break up, you know, before I have to do that. When's the wedding? In May of 2024. Yet sometime. Yeah, she's got too much time. In fact, she's got enough time to do it again. To do it again. They're going to want to avoid the embarrassment. Both of them do not want to have it be a discussion

at the wedding as to why she got removed. So, especially your brother. And it will work on your brother, I think, by saying, hey, I'm honestly thinking about removing her. I'm sorry if that upsets you, but I just like, it's my wedding, but like, I need to sit down and talk with you and understand like what's going on. And I'm sorry, it's upsetting. You have nothing to be ashamed of, yada, yada.

But I'm requiring this. My guess is he might be a little bit more open to that because the thought of you removing her and everyone finding out why will be something he very much wants to avoid. I agree with you. I think a lot of it is pride on his end. Yeah. And then ultimately, if they're not doing what you think is the healthiest approach, I think you maybe be the bad guy here and take her out. Yeah. It's your wedding. It's your wedding. Ultimately, if you do, if you do what he said and you have that conversation and stuff is still going

awry, like it's, it's your choice. Also with nine brothers and sisters, I think you have enough bridesmaids. I'm sure you do. Yeah. I do have plenty. The thing that was holding me back from making the decision was, and I did not bring it up, but when everybody found out, like my parents found out, somebody had brought up the wedding and, you know, the fact that she's a bridesmaid got brought up. And my mom basically told me point blank period, if you kick her out,

and it's not going to go. And if he doesn't go, then I'm not going to go. And I was like, yeah, your mom, your that's an idle threat, I think. Yeah, I think it was in the heat of the moment. I would say, mom, I understand you love, but this is A, this is my wedding. And B, I'm not having someone in my wedding who's going to do this to my brother. And if it's up to me to get him to wake up,

because why are we all pretending that this is okay? This is only going to hurt him in the future. It's only going to create more scars and more trauma for him. And he's going to require more therapy that he's unwilling to get to. And if she does end up staying in the wedding, make sure she stands on the very end of the pictures. The very end. Edit her out easily.

We can crop her out. Yeah, absolutely. There's zero chance your mom's not going to the wedding yeah for sure zero chance i agree i think she's a bit in the heat of the moment yeah you know but it like the initial impact was that's just how my mom is man she does that guilt trip thing. She knows where to press. Yeah. Well, you know, my parents can be bullies. Yeah. Sometimes you just have to stand up to bullies and, you know, standing up to your parents is tough, but it works. You know, when they finally realize they lose, when they don't have as much control, they throw a little temper tantrum, they say some shit and eventually they come around because ultimately they need you

more than you need them at this point in your life. So just remember that. I think take care of your brother. Protect your wedding, but take care of your brother. It's like he's lucky to have you and you're the only one right now who really sees the risks he's putting himself in and you see the big picture and good for you for not giving a shit about the status quo or the image or whatever. No one's going to care about that at the wedding day, but people are going to care years from now when you're like, who's that fucking person in this picture? And when I read at their wedding and remember that girl who cheated on you 10 years ago?

Yeah. Stuff doesn't really bother me that much. Seeing her in the pictures, it's fine. I really don't care about that i really am worried about him there you go you know and i'm wondering if that's just making me too biased you should be worried about him you're the only one who's worried about him you know everyone else is worried about how things look yeah use everyone's fear of appearances as a way to get access and have the conversations that you know need to be had yeah

all right that's a good idea okay well keep us posted i'm definitely interested on what you decide to do and uh but don't let anyone else convince you that you should pretend this isn't a big deal or that you should look the other way i think you're you know you tell people to follow your gut follow your gut your gut is telling you this is off and this isn't okay. And we shouldn't just pretend that everything's fine. And if they are going to work on it, great, fine. But what are they actually doing to, you know, to make change in this relationship? And right now they're not doing anything. Yeah.

Thank you. Thank you for validating that because I think it's been really hard to get that from family. So yeah, I'm sorry you're doing going through this alone but uh you can be the hero i will try all right well keep us posted i definitely want to know what you end up doing absolutely i will all right take care all right bye scott yes it's been fun it's been great thanks for coming man yeah uh if you uh are ever down i know you all watch the bachelor we'd love to have you back and recap or maybe when banner pumps on he is. Or maybe when Vanderpump's on next season, we'll get into it. I'm ready.

It's nice to find a fellow reality TV junkie like us. There's a lot of us, but not a lot of sort of sane ones. We didn't even get into your dodgeball. No, we got a lot to talk about. Yeah, I know. We got Bachelor's start on Monday. Maybe I think dodgeball too might be coming out and you are good at dodgeball. So maybe that's your next.

Yeah. My, my signature move is a split dog. I saw that. Yeah. Yeah. I was really impressed. We'll see what happens.

Uh, Scott, can you let everyone know where they can find you? Follow you? Uh, Instagram at Scott Evans, Graham and my Twitter. I don't remember.

I think it's the Scott Evans. I think. Okay. No tech talk for you. I have one, but I don't remember. I think it's the Scott Evans. I think. No TikTok for you. I have one, but I don't do it. Okay. I get too. Yeah, it's too much for me. I got too much reality TV to watch.

There you go. It was an absolute pleasure to have you come on, man. Congratulations on Barbie. Everyone go check it out. It's drops next week. Friday. We'll be watching. Go check it out.

Scott crushes in it. He's all over the movie. He's got lines. He's super excited. He speaks. Thanks for listening, guys. Don't forget to send in those questions at asknickatthevilefiles.com

for all things Ask Nick. And we'll be back tonight for another episode of Better Date to Never, live tonight, 9 p.m. Eastern. Check it out. We will see you then. Otherwise, on Monday. Bye.