The Viall Files - E633 Going Deeper with Natalie Joy - Pregnancy Updates, Taylor Swift/Scooter Theories, and The Fear of Not Liking Your Kids

Episode Date: August 31, 2023

Welcome back to The Viall Files: Going Deeper Edition! Today we are joined by Natalie Joy and Mary Franke to dive into the latest pop culture headlines and trends - including Taylor Swift vs. Scooter Braun, Kanye’s NSFW boat ride, and the sexualized Hunger Games prequel. We also hear from Nick and Natalie about pregnancy updates and what they’re looking forward to (and fearing) in terms of parenting. We then have a Sweating The Wedding caller whose college friend is getting married but is refusing her a plus one due to a combative relationship with her boyfriend.  “We don’t see a difference of opinion, we see good and evil.”  Start your 7 Day Free Trial of Viall Files + here: https://viallfiles.supportingcast.fm/  Please make sure to subscribe so you don’t miss an episode and as always send in your relationship questions to [e-mail] to be a part of our Monday episodes. Join us for our new LIVE show on Thursdays at 9PM ET/6PM PT on Amp, available in the Apple app store. Android User? Listen here: https://www.onamp.com/  To Order Nick’s Book Go To: http://www.viallfiles.com  If you would like to get some texting advice on Office Hours send an email to [e-mail] with “Texting Office Hours” in the subject line! To advertise on the show, contact [e-mail] or visit https://www.advertisecast.com/TheViallFiles  THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSORS: IQ Bar - Now get twenty percent off all IQBAR products, plus get FREE shipping. To get your twenty percent off, just text FILES to sixty-four thousand (64-000). Helix Sleep - Helix is offering 25% off all mattress orders AND two free pillows for our listeners in honor of Labor Day! Go to HelixSleep.com/Viall and use code HELIXPARTNER25. Rocket Money - Stop wasting money on things you don’t use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions – and manage your money the easy way – by going to https://www.RocketMoney.com/VIALL  Manscaped - Bring in the fall right and Get 20% Off and Free Shipping with the code VIALL at https://www.Manscaped.com  Episode Socials: @viallfiles @nickviall @nnataliejjoy @alison.vandam @liffordthebigreddog @dereklanerussell @genevievegoodman

what's going on everybody welcome back to another episode of the vile files going deeper edition i'm your host nick joined by joined by the full household today. Allie, Amanda, Derek, Genevieve are all in studio in LA. We are here in New York City for a very special episode. Happy birthday to the love of my life, the one, the only, our pop culture correspondent, also Natalie Joy. Happy birthday, Natalie. Happy birthday. She's like our pop culture correspondent slash our guest. Because our original guest, Erica and Scott, our dear friends, had a tragic accident and are no longer with us. No.

I'm just kidding. Fake death announcement. No. Jesus. They went to go see their grandma who's in like hospice. Yeah, they had to. Yeah. So they couldn't.

They had a family emergency. We also have a special. Well, Natalie is going to be our guest today because it's her birthday. And then we brought in a pop culture correspondent, my cousin, Mary Parker. I'm going to give it up for Mary. She's also the reason why she was here is because we were in a rich debate yesterday talking about Tuesday's episode with Paige and we got into our Scooter Braun

conspiracy theories and Mary being the swifty that she is had some very interesting insights and I was like, you know what we need to do is have you on to share said interesting insights. Mary comes with a lot of taste and a lot of insight when it comes to pop culture

so we are excited to have Mary with us. Hey, everyone. Say hi to Mary. Hi, Mary. Thanks for having me. Speaking of fake death announcements, there was one in Bachelor Nation. That was weird. Yeah.

I forgot about this guy. So he was on Caitlin's season, went home night one. Is this correct? I never met him. We crossed paths, as they crossed paths in the as they say in the bachelor mansion but what a tragic uh this seems like honestly a tragic uh situation story he uh anyone want to update our audience a little bit of what's going on with the what's his name josh i feel like this is one of those things where you're like what can someone pick

me up please like i'm not having fun here on the Internet. So there was a statement released on his Instagram that said, it is with an extremely heavy heart that we share the tragic news of Joshua's unexpected passing. As all who knew him can attest, Joshua was an incredibly bright light and an increasingly dim world. His fearless voice and indomitable spirit helped thousands of people in their darkest moments feel just a little less alone um i can continue but it goes on and on and it's like it's not like they just you know black text create mode joshua's dead like you know it's a very intensive kind of he had he had spoken out in like 2021 about he was struggling with mental health um he had said he posted on july 2021 i'm josh cider i am a suicide attempt survivor i battle ocd bipolar

depression and gad but i refuse to give up like so this was all kind of paired with the fact that he had been vocal before about his mental health struggles and clearly had been a survivor so i think that and then that pairing with such a you know heartfelt long statement people were just concluding like okay maybe he had he'd not survived yeah because it ends with um a mental health crisis support line but then like a day later, turns out not dead. He posts a video saying I'm alive and well, and that a hacker, he had his Instagram hacked for 24 hours. That is the nicest and most gracious message from a hacker I've ever seen. Truly. Well, I'm like, are we at the point of AI where like AI can generate stuff like that? Because it's like weird and upsetting and sadistic to think about. But like, I feel like if you fed AI a thousand like death announcements, like it would be

able to with like the technology level that we're at right now, create like. Are you suggesting that Josh couldn't have written that for himself? I don't know. I just don't know why someone would do this. I don't know I just don't know like why someone would do this I don't know either I mean I don't know anything about him but I his ex uh who's his ex Allie Monica Beverly Hills drag race star she uh seems to doubt the alleged hacking of his account which I would tend to agree i feel like if you if you get hacked there's like a bunch of like ridiculous posts that have nothing to do with your content they're trolling you they'll delete a bunch of content yeah it's chaotic they don't write some sort of

thoughtful personalized message that clearly would require research about that person in their past. Yeah, they're trying to impersonate you and get you to buy crypto. I was going to say, it's always a scam. It's never a positive thing like that. The one thing I will say, though, is I feel like with the internet, bad behavior begets bad behavior, and people start doing these awful trends. We've seen it in what we've covered of people throwing things on stage and injuring performers and this is coming off of that whole lil tay death hoax so is it did someone see that and then get inspired and then they wanted to try and do it i think it's bold

of us to assume that he wrote it himself considering we don't know him but his own girlfriend or ex-girlfriend said that she thinks that he did it himself. She's like, he's called him a sick motherfucker. She like says it's infuriating and she's so angry. But like we talked about, just optics alone, it does not look like an account that got hacked. And that it's an excuse for anyone who has things they don't want posted on their social.

And if they maybe accidentally post something, that's a common excuse. Like, oh, I was hacked. It's kind of hard to prove, but like nothing he has done, nothing about this account suggests that it was hacked. And yeah, it is a sick joke. And unfortunately people do sick things for attention. And you know, this is a character, I don't know anything about him, but his brief time on the show was someone who seemed to do a lot of intense and kind of ridiculous things for attention. But this is all to say, thankfully, he is alive. Maybe this does show that he very much is struggling with his mental health. But at the same time, it doesn't

make what he did okay. Because yeah, faking your death and just, I i mean i'd never met the guy but when his you know it's like anyone who's associated with bachelor nation gets reached out to and then all these questions come up about like oh has this have anything to do with their time on the show it's an it it reaches so many people um and affects so many people um and especially if you struggle with mental health like in the speculation about how it happened and then we always kind of go to a dark place so it's pretty fucked up not to side tangent but reminds me there's a situation where there was a youtuber that actually faked his girlfriend's death for clicks and it like blew up and became a whole thing and like you know her family got

all concerned and he ended up getting his YouTube account like banned for doing that. How is that not illegal? Like, I think the police did get involved. His girlfriend's family was very upset about it because they're like, we thought she had passed and was like very concerned. So that was like another situation. It is illegal, but like, I wonder if Instagram slash Facebook has like...

A community guideline. I think, is there a follow-up to this? And I guarantee you they can prove whether his account was hacked or not right they have that ability like what server was signed on yeah it wouldn't be that hard and for something that does end up making national news and just kind of the the domino effect of any down announcement, let alone a fake one, does have costly ramifications. So I wonder if Facebook slash Instagram

would be willing to do their due diligence because, yeah, if it is fake, there should be some accountability. He said he was working with authorities to identify the hacker. So I wonder if there will be a follow-up. It sounds like based off of this person's ex and just a little bit I know,

I just don't know if this is a trustworthy guy. And this is all to say maybe he is not okay emotionally and mentally. And maybe these are all signs of that. I will say it is not illegal to fake your own death. It's not. It is not. Well, there are no state or federal laws that specifically make it a crime to fabricate your own death. However, you get into legal trouble when you try to create a new identity, potentially get

your life insurance policy, get a loan or any sort of credit under your new fake identity of someone who doesn't exist, applying for jobs and having to fabricate your job history under a name that's now new. Like, that's how you get into trouble is when you try to become someone else. So if you fake your own death and like live on a cash-only diet, you're fine. Potentially, yeah.

You know, like move to... Go in the wilderness somewhere. Yeah, go in the wilderness and like just work for cash. Maybe. Cash-only diet sounds kind of glamorous. Honestly. Well, somebody who's not getting any cash also in bachelor nation did you see that they used uh a clip of demi for this season's bachelor in paradise trailer despite the fact she is not on the beach yeah it was quick but yeah is the is bachelor in paradise so boring this season that in their promo which promos typically pull the most

exciting moments from a season and you put it all together to make it more juicy and dramatic than it usually is and in this particular promo they they showed uh demi and brandon jet skiing it's like first of all jet skiing a promo of a jet ski isn't all that exciting exciting yeah like it feels like there would be other footage yeah and they're like you know what we need we need two people jet skiing this will really amp it up like fuck but we didn't do anyone just let's just pull let's just pull dimmy from last last time like what a what a bad look the truth truth is, I have my concerns with this season. Oh? Because I've heard from people who were there that it was fine.

And other seasons, I've had, we, we've had friends come back from the beach. And we've been like, what's it like? And there was, in some cases, legitimate fear on their face. You know? in other cases it was like i don't know man that shit's fucked up it was crazy it was nuts and this season it's been like yes you know it's cool it's fine yeah take your time you know i i don't know it's not a good sign that uh they're using promos from the previous season i hope i'm wrong i i hope i'm wrong but there there are new sheriffs in town, so to speak.

New producers running the show. So we will see if they're up to task. Did they say anything about doing that after Jimmy called him out? No, I mean, they typically never respond publicly to anything. I mean, like in all seriousness, I don't know. Maybe it was just something lazy by the post department, but it can't be a good sign. You would think they would have so much content to work with.

moment where they're just fucking around and we'll use that to make it seem like there's a fight but at least that's from the current season because they have hours and hours and hours of footage of which they're using you know five percent of but there's so much stuff that they can just put in a super teased as they call it and make it seem like the season's like full of drama and just the fact that they're like we need a jet ski with two people who aren't even on this season can't be a good sign. You know, it's a bit concerning. And as if like no one would notice, even if even if they have a jam packed season ready to go to blow us away, they're making it seem like they don't. It's such a weird move. Yeah. And it's also like I don't it doesn't make sense because it's not like they really try to sell the paradise element of paradise.

Like, sure. It's like they have some dates where people get all like, you know, excited for the date. But in general, it's like they talk about how hot and sweaty and mosquito filled it is. Like, it's not like it's meant to be this like hugely adventurous, like the accommodation or the activities are such a big appeal. So it's like for what? For what? Well, and it's like for what for what well and it's just like you know people are gonna pick the things apart everyone's covering this and you chose to use a shot where we can see their faces and two you're picking someone like demi who's

been on the show multiple times every like a lot of people know who she is everyone who's a fan of the show it's like she's one of the like top people who've come back time and time again pick like a random shot if you do need a jet ski shot find it with like a sunset where it's just a silhouette you don't know who's on there like it's just stupid and they're bringing down like hannah brown and katie thurston like former leads right who are not on the show they're just like bringing day cards and like sometimes they do that because they'll bring in their former stars. People think that they might be on the show. So it's bad enough already that... That was my biggest takeaway of the super tease of Paradise are, who the fuck are these people? And it's not like I haven't been watching. We watch every every season and I think that just kind of, it speaks to the lack of star power they haven't been able to cultivate over the past few seasons. You know, there are other seasons where you watch Paradise, you're like, and you look forward to certain characters being on the show, you know, because they were just dramatic or fun to watch or you just enjoy their journey. And there's just, there seems to be less of that, you know, with this cast. You know, you're like,

I kind of remember this person or that person. There's not really, you know, you know, Rachel, former Bachelorette, is their, you know, obviously their biggest star. But just in general, there's just, where a lot of people were like, who the fuck are these people? And I just feel like that wasn't the case

with the past couple seasons. You know, I think he had stronger characters. Do you feel like people just don't want to do it anymore? Like they got a lot of no's from the bigger names in Fascination? That's a good question. I don't really know. The majority of their cast has always been

from the previous two seasons. You know, the current year that they're in and then like maybe like people who didn't make it from the previous season. Some of their heavy hitters call it that, like the people who go the furthest for, you know, especially if it's the Bachelorette because of timing don't get to go on because they're still filming their current season. There's a little bit of that. So they say that they always pulled from those two main seasons, I think it just shows that they just haven't really had a lot of star power the past couple of seasons because there's just no one in general that you're truly all that invested in, you know, other than, you know, having a former lead on. So other than Rachel, I think there's a lot of forgettable people and apparently not making enough content where they don't need to pull clips from previous season. Yeah. I feel like it really demonstrates how like the reality TV landscape has changed. I feel like The Bachelor had a monopoly on like being like the beating heart of American reality TV for so long.

And then now that there's been the invention of like all these new formats that have definitely like taken and drawn from The Bachelor and like used a lot of the like formula of success and then twisted it and modernized it and like made it something new it feels like the show doesn't even even if they wanted to I don't know how much they really could invest in contestants the way they have in the past to like really make them have this like huge public following and significance because there's just like a lot more going on and I thought that's why I'm so curious about Senior Bachelor because I feel like that's something where I'm like, this feels kind of new and exciting. And like, I feel like Senior Bachelor could become the franchise.

And I don't know that it will. But I think if it went well, that could become because the show has always kind of in format been a little more like straightforward and like simple than, say, a show like Love is Blind or like The Ultimatum where there's like a lot more logistics. And so I think it kind of lends itself to like wholesomeness in ways that like maybe other reality TV shows don't. We'll find out. Looking at people's Instagram following, like Raven, for example, from Love is Blind has almost a million followers on Instagram and Charity, who is like our most recent lead, Bachelorette, has 234,000 followers. Shocking. Yeah.

Yeah. That ain't right. I don't think it's center of the conversation anymore. No. Yeah, it's definitely not what it used to be. But, you know, it's interesting. The Bachelor franchise has been around for so long. They've had years in which there have been years in the past where they thought maybe

there were conversations about the show getting canceled and it was dropping in ratings and things like that. And it found a resurgence and it kind of became more culturally relevant again. I still don't think the show is going anywhere anytime soon because if you ask the people in charge, it's still making a ton of money for the networks and the people making the show. And at the end of the day, it's still profitable and that's all that really matters. And yeah, is it king anymore? Not necessarily. All to your point, Amanda, I think there's just more competition. There's just more options. And so they're not doing what they used to do in terms of ratings, but it's still profitable. So it's not going anywhere. So the big question is, can they figure out ways to get people excited again? Is it the bad? I think the senior bachelor, golder bachelor is going to be more nostalgic. I think there's a lot of curiosity

around it. People will watch it the first time, but I think it's going to lack the necessary drama for people really to get invested and give a shit all the way through. And I think it'll be endearing and cute. And I think that a lot of people will watch the first episode. I think there'll be a lot of people who watched the last episode. The question is, can they keep people watching all the way through? Right. Without like the super tease of like someone accusing the other person of like being a sex worker, like, you know, and all the other kind of like drama that we've seen for like these younger seasons.

It's like very hard to imagine them having that kind of drama with like older people. If there is old person drama, then I'll be hooked. Because if it's a bunch of like catty. If it's like Beverly Hills Housewives, cattiness, like that will be so good. That'll be iconic. But I feel like the women who will be on it are your normal people, you know, and don't. Well behaved. Other than Matt James's mother.

Is she officially on? Yeah. So I just saw an article that was published two minutes ago with the names of the women going on the season. And they say Patty is none other than Matt James's mother. So do you think other women will know who she is? Like, will they have watched

Matt's season? Will she be coming in like at a different level? Like, is she just here to be famous because your son's famous? You know, will they question her intentions that way? Yeah. Yeah. Are they going to say you're here for the wrong reasons? It's a great question. I really don't know. I really, I don't know what their goal is with this show. I don't know if their goal is to elicit drama. If they want to, they can, you know, the producers can certainly ask leading questions that are triggering for the people there and they can scratch

insecurities or are they going to lean more wholesome and have it be endearing? So I think that'll, I have no idea. How is Matt James's mother's age public knowledge? I only ask because I wanted my mother on this show so bad. And they said she's like 63. And they said she's too young. They wanted like older. Your mom is 63?

Yes. I know. I can't believe it. Stunning. I believe she's 69 or 70. Okay, I guess. Yeah, they really? Oh, they have.

Okay, but I'm seeing there's a cast member named Anna who's 61. Oh. Anna. Who do you have to yell at? I feel like I's a cast member named Anna who's 61. So. Anna. Who do you have to yell at? I feel like I have to yell at someone who's no longer there anymore. And that feels like it won't even do anything. This was like a couple of years ago where you brought it up. Yeah.

When it was just when they started doing the promos. Yeah. They've been fishing a while. They were just like, I'm actually going to do the show. They were casting for it. I was like, my mom. I'm so glad your mom's not on it. I also am.

It's been a headache for me. I feel like. Even just looking at on it. I also am. Headache for me. Even just looking at the names it makes me excited because it's like Joan Jeannie, Edith. Like you know how it's always there's like seven Olivia's or something and I'm like I want seven Phyllis's like I want Phyllis M and Phyllis P. It's like a Dorothy and a

Diane. Yeah. We're going to have to see what names are like popular after this. Like what names come back in circulation. Karen's. Do they plan on making a golden bachelorette from this season of the golden bachelor? Oh, I hope so. And I hope it's Matt James's mother. And if they don't, well, do they deserve criticism?

Hmm. Well, I feel like it might be harder to cast older men than to cast older women. Because they're dead? I don't know. Yeah. Honestly, I think maybe that's what it is. Is that like, I feel like in my head, I'm like, oh, like men have a slightly higher death rate.

It's a shorter lifespan for men. Which is really sad. There's a whole country they can cast from. They might, there's at least 25 living. I think they have to at least do both. Right? Give it a go. Yeah. It's 2023. If we're going to's try it out let's try it out i just feel like i've met some and this i've also met some iconically like cranky older women but i just feel like when i

think about like a lot of the older men i know like they are like not doing anything that they don't want to do like they are some of the least accommodating population. So it's like it's funny to me trying to imagine like a producer trying to like do all the social lubrication and leading with like a grandpa who's like, I don't give a fuck. Like you can't make me stuck in his way. There is a lot of that. But I feel like if they really wanted to, they could find enough of willing participants. You just have to go to the Costco food section and you will find a bunch of angry old

people that love drama. Done. That's the first group date. Easiest casting. Go to the free samples and there you go. Yeah, I'm excited for hometowns where it's going to be like meet the kids. That's what I've been saying. As opposed to meet the parents. What are your intentions with my mother? Maybe that's where

the drama will come from. Probably. Yeah. Oh my's yeah like kid drama but also speaking of kids natalie how is your pregnancy going like how are you doing how are you feeling um i'm better now i in this currently in this moment i know i've had the last i't know, I'd say maybe two weeks where I've been pretty good. I take a morning medication, nausea medication every morning. I would highly recommend if you have nausea to take Zofran and whenever your doctor allows you to, because it has saved my life. Truly. There is definitely a time when it is safe for you to start taking it. So I wouldn't just, you know, talk about that with your doctor.

But I finally am able to eat meals and I'm not nauseous anymore. And it has been so much better. I do feel like I'm entering my cranky mood swing era. Love. Yeah. Yeah, no, love too. Yeah, it's been really fun for Nick. Well, yeah. It's like all his fault i'm curious because like i feel like i i i'm not growing a baby so my instinct would to always

be someone who is growing a baby like benefit of the doubt of like you are like it's not just like you're eating for two like you have all these other considerations like your body is like evolving in brand new ways like for nick like for you are you sort of taking the approach of like no bad behavior while you're pregnant everything is welcome kind of yeah it's been it's been uh in all seriousness i've enjoyed trying to be a part of the pregnancy in a way you know but obviously i'm not experiencing all the extreme changes that Natalie's experiencing and I don't have to deal with all of those emotions behind it. But yeah, as her partner and someone who wants to participate in the pregnancy, I have kind of taken the approach that, you know, I feel more part of the pregnancy by allowing Natalie

to, you know, offload any energy that she might be feeling that's holding her down. And yeah, I'm happy to be the good sport. I'm in my current good sport phase. It makes me feel like I'm a part of the pregnancy. I'm contributing by being flexible, being down to do whatever. You know, my goal is to make sure she's comfortable and happy. And, you know, anytime I can accomplish that, it makes me feel like part of the pregnancy in a weird way. Like, you know, like that's that's my sacrifice, you know, where anything goes. I already feel bad that I'm a raging bitch at times, but it makes me feel even worse

when he's just still like so nice and he's not like annoyed that I'm being mean to him. He's like, yeah, okay, totally fine, babe. We can do that. I love you so much. And you look so beautiful right now. I'm like, fuck. I try to pick a fight, damn it.

Yeah. There was a time where I could tell she was just trying to pick a fight. I was like, cool. No, that's super, super great. Yeah. There was a time where I could tell she was just trying to pick a fight. I was like, cool. No, that's super, super great. Yeah, I'm definitely the worst right now. I'll do better, you know, for sure. You know, like I'm,

I don't know what I'm supposed to do, but like, you know, we can have three lunches today. It's fine. Like this one didn't work out. Let's just try a new place. This one didn't work out. He's like, if you could just take a bite

to maybe get you to the next place, that'll be great. So you're not nauseous walking there. But if not, I totally understand. Yeah. Like my only goal today is to make you happy and comfortable. And if I've accomplished that, that's a win. We love.

Are there any foods in particular that you found like either you've had very strong opinions about either positive or negative? In the first like three and a half months, I was just talking about this at dinner the other night, everything, it was like, I could taste every ingredient and like, not in a good way. Like I would go somewhere and it would maybe taste a little bit like chemically. And I'm like, there's bleach in this. Like, ma'am, there's not bleach in them. Like, no, no, no. I'm tasting bleach in this salad. They're like, could you lower your voice? There's no bleach. We don't use chemicals around here.

And then like all vegetables tasted very dirty. Like they had just truly pulled them out of the ground and put them in a bowl. So I really struggled in the beginning with finding a food that just tasted good. Now I feel like I definitely crave like sweets like sweets yeah there's been a sweets craving the past few days yeah which they say what is that an old wives tale is like sweet or salty like which one and i don't know which one that goes to like the gender yeah it's like if you crave salty it's like girl if you crave sweet it's boy or something i don't know while a pregnancy sweet tooth is

associated with having a girl food cravings when pregnant with a boy are typically linked with savory savory we've heard so many things and again we know the gender and i gotta say they like half match up i don't know should we honestly well we might be split because natalie if you've been craving sweets it says girl but it's also listing peanut butter under a boy and you've been doing a lot of pb and j's so much peanut butter yeah we're getting some conflicting information here yeah peanut butter bananas in the morning have been my one of each i'm curious have you been saying natalie's pregnant or have you been saying we're pregnant that's a great question i don't know if i've really said either oh no but i guess when you're telling people i think you say i guess we yeah okay i wanna i wanna feel like a part of it you know i don't want to take anything away from natalie's experience but

like i want to be involved and i think it's more like we are having a baby yeah natalie is pregnant yeah that's i feel like that's the way it should be i think that's the correct i get really annoyed when people say we are no you're not no like do you remember in 2014 when mila kunis was on like jimmy kimmel or something and she came out with a group of pregnant women and she was like stop saying we're pregnant you're not pregnant we're pregnant oh i was like i think i was like i stop saying we're pregnant. You're not pregnant. We're pregnant. Oh. I was like, I think I was like, I don't know, 12. And I was like, oh my god. This is a huge thing right now.

Like riveting. We're seeing that. So we're having a baby. Natalie's pregnant. That's the proper. Good answer. When it comes to navigating your first pregnancy, Natalie, and then first experience having a baby as a couple.

Like where have you like been turning for information that's been helpful? Because I'm sure you get a ton of unsolicited opinions, both between like kind of people who engage with you on social media, people, you know, in person, the Internet, like your parents. Like where have you been kind of like finding the most helpful like support and insight? I feel like definitely people who are close to me who have recently had a baby. I feel like a lot of people, my mom wants to give me a lot of advice and I'm like, your last baby was 25 years ago. Like, I'm so sorry, but like things have changed. You know, like there are things that are different. Put a cold rag on. My mom's cure to any sort of pain, any injury is a cold cloth.

And she's like, that will fix it. She's like, you fell and hurt your hand. Cold cloth on the back of your neck. And you will feel so much better. It's not like a cold cloth on the back of your neck. Cold cloth on the back of your neck. Yeah. But I, yeah, I feel like my sister, I'm definitely really close with.

I ask her a lot of stuff. Nick's sister, Maria. I've gone to her a good bit. Yeah. I just, I also, a lot of stuff. Nick's sister, Maria, I've gone to her a good bit. Yeah. I just, I also, I feel a lot of people have given me books. I've been trying to do my own research and figure out things on my own, but it is really nice to have trustworthy people that, you know, like my sister is the mother that I would love to be. Her daughter is amazing and just perfect. And I would, if I could take any of her tips, I absolutely would. So I think listening to her has been extremely helpful for me. No worries to like answer this if this is like kind of more on the personal side, but like I love personal.

OK, I would love to know, like, I guess how like your relationship with your body has kind of like evolved during this process. during this process? It's actually, I kind of am just now going through this. I had a moment on this trip where I kind of almost broke down and it's like, I, and if this sounds out of touch, please stop me. But like, I am someone who I've been the same weight and size pretty much my whole adult life. So I've been very lucky and blessed to like not struggle with any, I've just been able to wear all the clothes that I have and packing for this trip, I packed, I'm like, okay, I'm just going to throw in like, I know these jeans are pretty baggy on me. Like I know, you know, some dresses, some skirts, and I just threw it all in a suitcase. And then once I got here to like try on outfits, nothing fit. None of these jeans were buttoning. It feels like such a

mental battle because you know you're pregnant and you know you're so lucky and blessed to be able to have a baby. And it feels, it's such a magical thing, but on the same side, your body is changing so much. And it's something that I'm definitely not used to. So it's been really hard for me to like, not separate the two and just make it all as one. I'm just growing a baby. This is part of the process. Like I've just got to keep moving. So it's, it's, I've kind of now, cause I feel like I just now popped, like my belly popped and I love fashion. And so it's hard for me to nick's like well you'll just wear dresses and like onesies and i'm like i don't want to wear dresses and onesies i want to wear outfits but i don't have anything well at first when we got no at first when she got pregnant

um yep he says we are pregnant i don't know what i say i I don't say either. Yeah. You know, I would literally never say we're pregnant. Absolutely never. Never. At first, when she got pregnant, she was, you know, when you get pregnant, nothing, when you first find out, such great news, such big news. But then you're immediately like, okay, well, nothing's really changed. You know, like you want it to feel differently. So the first couple of weeks, it was like Natalie joking about about like i feel i have a craving and like is my stomach

showing and meanwhile like she's kind of sticking her stomach out or like after she ate and she's feeling a little bloated would like use that as an opportunity to be like look i'm showing and we kind of had a lot of fun with that and kind of goofing around and then what feels like overnight you know now she is actually she's been starting to show for the past few weeks. And like, yeah, it's been less exciting for her because it went from like, I can't wait. You know, it went from like, I can't wait to have cravings and I don't feel pregnant. And then it's been one of those, like, be careful what you wish for. But like, it's been, it's been obviously overall really great and fun, but it's, it's been like, yeah, it's been quite the journey.

And we're just kind of rolling with the punches and having a good time doing it like i know that and i know i talked about this on our first like pregnancy episode i know it's such a sensitive subject to talk about you know any sort of like how you got pregnant and how long it took you and being pregnant. It's, it's truly such a blessing and we really are so lucky. I wish it was a little bit more normalized to talk about, be so happy about how it is,

but also like it is hard and it is like going through this the first time. It's, there's so many changes and you just, it's, it's such a mental battle and i want to be able to yeah vent about that and not feel bad that like because i i am so blessed and so lucky and i'm so grateful and i really feel all that but at the same time i have a lot of confusing feelings about you know being in so much pain and my body changing and you know the the fears that come with being pregnant the other night she seemed so mad at me but she wasn't she

was just mad i looked at her and it looked like she was regretting every choice that she had made to lead her to this moment well i kept trying on outfits and nick every outfit i put on would go that's so cute. No, that looks amazing. You should wear that. And I'm like, no, it doesn't. It doesn't look cute. These pants won't button.

So then I would change and I put a new outfit on. No, that looks so cute. You should wear that. Keep that on. That one looks. I said, if I swear, if I hear you say the word cute one more fucking time, I'm done. Meanwhile, I was also like, we got to get going because we were meeting friends for dinner at seven and it was six fifty five and she was lying in bed. And I'm

like, we have to be somewhere in five minutes. And then then she had an outfit crisis following getting out of bed at six fifty five. But turns out that meant that if I was going to rush her, that I needed to map out in granted we're in New York. So I I realized that I I was going to rush her, that I needed to map out in granted, we're in New York. So I, I realized that I wasn't allowed to rush her unless I had our entire route mapped out from what subway we're going to take, which turn left or right. Because when it was like after a rush turn, we got to go. And then she's like, well, where are we going? And he has no idea. He's like, wait, hold on. I got to find the group she's like well where are we going and he has no idea he's like wait hold on i gotta find the group chat where's the right text i'm like you don't even know

what subway we have to get on and you just made me then we got on the wrong subway and then we missed our stop and it just became more and more my fault oh yeah they showed up like five minutes after me so yeah it was good uh but it's been fun but again it's uh i'm it's it it weirdly in a weird way makes me feel like i'm doing my part by helping her like feel okay with feeling whatever it is she's feeling and and not really make it a thing but yeah so it is very much there's no wrong or bad feeling in pregnancy i'm just here to support whatever that feeling is well so that was that on throughout the rest of our relationship not sustainable for sure definitely definitely good for nine months no but i was talking to my friend jackie about

this she's pregnant with her second one and i was excited for jackie and natalie to meet because they're pregnant at the same time and when i was texting her i was like natalie's gonna be at my birthday you can meet her um literally jackie texted was like, Natalie's going to be at my birthday. You can meet her. Literally, Jackie texted me, tell her it's okay to complain. I would at times feel guilty complaining because in my head, I was like, stop being ungrateful. You wanted this. But two things can be true at the same time.

Preach one million percent. And it's so isolating when you can't be honest honest about like something that's challenging and it's like it doesn't mean you're like negating how lucky you are like all of the other things but i just find in situations where you're not allowed to like express the full range of emotion and like the many conflicting things that can be true at once like i just feel like that's when i feel loneliness loneliest is like when there's stuff that it feels like it's unacceptable to say it's like i was venting. I don't know. I've been kind of using my stories as a event session, whether it's about, you know, a green juice I got that tasted absolutely disgusting. And I got like a couple of DM responses. It's like, why? Like, why do you have this attitude? You're pregnant. You should be so.

And it's like, it's just it feels so defeating. Yeah. It's like, I, yes, I am aware. Thank you. But I also, my hormones are fucked. Like I am feeling angry right now and I'm just expressing that. Like, I'm sorry. Like Seth could be here talking just like Nick is about me having an outfit crisis. Like I'm not pregnant and I've definitely been. And that same same like so frustrated

nothing looks good right i feel terrible but because you're pregnant it's like this should be beautiful this should be like right i should be embracing every way i look yeah it's okay when you're not pregnant but when you are pregnant you cannot yeah but i also a bunch of shit yeah but we really are happy i swear we really are happy there just are a lot of moments that it's it's almost really i can't believe we're this far along as we are because it went from finding out we're pregnant to it just knowing what we were but not feeling like we were you know type of thing because nothing really changed to holy shit we're this far along already in a kind of a blink of an eye. And again, you know, it's like when you find out you're pregnant, nine months seems so far away. Like it's, it's like,

yeah, we're pregnant, but I can actually imagine actually having this baby, but it's coming up so close and yeah, it'll be, it'll be here before we know it. It'd be kind of crazy. Like we went to the lake house, like before we went to New York and I hope we can go back because we absolutely love it. And it's been a dream come true to, to, to, to be up there.

But there's also like a really strong chance the next time we will be there, we'll have a child. It's just kind of crazy to think about that, you know? And so that's been kind of, kind of surreal. But the lake house update has been fantastic it really is

a it's lived it's all it's truly lived up all the expectations i ever had about it it must be so triumphant being there especially with like the process that it was and like knowing how like challenging it was like i'm sure you would have like savored every moment even without that but it's like especially top of mind like well there's no guarantee I was gonna live up to the hype I hadn't been there in like 30 years you know and I was you know there was definitely a possibility I'd get up there and go yeah cool it's like it's fine but no it's amazing it's like I love we just love chilling there it's relaxing it's it's a beautiful view to wake up to a lake, go to bed, watch the sunset to a lake. And obviously it's been super exciting. So Mary's my cousin through marriage. My cousin,

Seth, is her husband. And Seth is my mom's brother's son on that side of the family. And it was just been really cool to talk about like, when I told my uncle, uh, Mary's father-in-law that, you know, I was buying back the house and he was going through his like old, his basement and bring up his like tackle box from when he was a kid and things like that. And like, and they are having all these memories and just, you know, when I was a kid, you know, this was the place that I enjoyed going to the most. So the idea that we have this house and we're having a kid to have it continue to be a place where people build, you know, their memories is like such an exciting and cool feeling. And to know that, like, I hope that we have this in our family for a long time. Like, it'd be great to, I was imagining my kids, kids, like

enjoying being at the lake house, like long after we're gone, you know, is this still going to be a place where this family creates memories and things like that. And it's like weird because we were talking about this last night, what I'm really excited. I didn't even think about this because, you know, when I bought it and I, you know, I essentially just gave it to my parents to live there and my parents are about to be empty nesters for the first time. I don't even think about this because, you know, when I bought it and I, you know, I essentially just gave it to my parents to live there. And my parents are about to be empty nesters for the first time. I don't know how long, like 30, 40 fucking years or something like that, which I think people forget, you know, what a time, what a transitional period.

We were talking about that last night with, with Mary's father-in-law, you know, it's just like, you go from being like the king of your castle, you know, you're the head of the family, you have your kids, you're the center of their universe. And then once you grow up and they kind of start their own families and start their own lives, you go from, and depending on how your relationship is with your partner after so many years of marriage, like not everyone is connected as, you know, it can be, you can go from being the center of people's universes to feeling very alone, you know? And so in very, like almost like overnight, you know, when you become an empty nester, I do think that's like a lot of, as I've talked with my parents and talk with older people,

like it can be a very scary part of life that people don't think about. And it really kind of gave me a warm feeling to know that like the lake house, you know, it's like an excuse for all my siblings to go visit mom and dad or grandma and grandpa, you know, and have their kids because you want, you want grandma and grandpa's place to be fun.

You know, you want it to be a fun place to go. And not every grandparent's house is fun. You know, sometimes it's like old and stuffy and you're not supposed to touch this and you're not supposed to touch that. And you're like, I don't want to go to a fucking grandma's house.

That's so true. But like my parents now have a desk, like a fun destination. It gives me peace of mind knowing that like now my parents who still very much enjoying hanging out alone and with each other, that it will always be easy for them to entertain when they want to. And it will always be easy for, to have their kids and their grandkids want to come visit

them and make memories there. So that's, that's like, that was like a really cool realization that I had as like a benefit to getting the house is like, they won't feel lonely and people will want to visit them. And, you know, as, as they are grandchildren, grandchildren grow up, like going to grandma and grandpa's lake house will always seem fun and exciting. And just bringing that energy is like great because yeah, getting old is fucking scary. And also like, I feel like we're entering a chapter of our lives where, you know, you get to a certain age and you become the caretaker of your parents again. You know, they take care of you for so long. And all of a sudden, like my parents are fine. They're doing great.

They're super healthy, you know, overall. But like you're I'm entering that stage of what is what do my parents need? You know, how can I take care of them? And it's like a very vulnerable and crazy feeling. Totally. In addition to thinking like kind of about like the way that your kids will experience, like having grandparents, have there been any other elements of parenthood that have been kind of like top of mind, whether it's like stuff that you are really

excited about or things that you're like turning over in your brain or trying to sort of suss out where you stand as of now? You know, we talk a lot about that. I'm kind of nervous to admit. Please. We're worried that we know we will love our children. We know unconditionally our children will not want for love. We will be there by their side through good times and bad. There is no

guarantee we're going to like our kid. That's true, but you can kind of form them into someone you like. Sure, to a certain degree, but I think we are born the way... And I'm saying this as someone who has 10 siblings, and there are... Can we insert the crickets after Nick said that, please? We're all just like...

That's fine. I'm just saying... He's like, we are Biggest Fear. I'm like, no, bitch, that's yours, motherfucker. I'm just being honest. I have 11... There's 11 kids, and we're all fucking... we have the same parents and we we all had a really wonderful childhood and with and our parents values didn't really all change all

that much you know they've become more progressive as if we've gotten older etc etc but everyone's different you know and and and I remember siblings you know being born you born when I was old enough. And they just from the get were just fucking different. And I think how you're raised can certainly have a significant impact on your life. But we're born with different personalities. And I have siblings. We all love our siblings. But we all have siblings that we wouldn't necessarily hang out with if they weren't our siblings. We all love our siblings, but we all have siblings that we wouldn't necessarily

hang out with if they weren't our siblings. You don't get to pick family. And if you're thinking about it, it's the same with kids. I'm going to love my kid, but what if we just have different personalities? What if they take after their uncle or aunt who I'm just like, what if they take after their uncle or aunt who like, I'm just like, Oh, we got to hang out with them again. You know, like it's,

it's not a guarantee. And I just think that's part of parenting of realizing that you love your child, but like you might like being in the same room might be, I think there is definitely, I think, I think there are definitely will be moments. There will be,

but there really, There's never an awkward moment with a family member? I'm a thousand percent with Nick on this. Am I an obnoxious kid? There will be moments that Nick won't There will be moments that Nick won't like our child because they're just like annoying or

whatever. But I don't think overall you'll be like, yeah, I just don't fuck with that kid. Like love him, but like, yeah, he's just like not really my no of course i would love my child unconditionally but i'm just objectively realizing that there is no guarantee they're gonna pop out and be like yeah we're best friends totally i think it's an amazing sentiment because it's like no i think it's so important like something my mom is really big on is like kids show up as they are of like yes there are ways that you can like absolute like you you know, whole nature versus nurture. Like there's definitely a role of nurture, a way you can like shape them, hopefully like instill values in them.

But there's also just like inherent personality traits that like as a parent, like some there's some stuff that you're just like kind of excavating, like you're just discovering it. And so I think it's a really cool sentiment to admit that there's some ways that you can't like assume your kid is going to be compatible with you in every which way. And as their parent, there's a sense of responsibility that I'm going to have to be the one who accommodates to my child more than I expect them to accommodate to me. And if I want to have a relationship with my child, especially early on, I'm going to have to find ways to make sure that I can connect with them, even if it doesn't come as naturally as I might hope. They might pop up. And again, Natalie and I are very different

in a lot of ways, and with different personalities. She's more extroverted. I'm more introverted. So there's certain character traits that our kid is going to inherit, and we just don't know how that's going to play out. And I do think you just assume that you're going to have a kid, and they're going to be like clones of you. And like, that's not necessarily true. And like, yeah, as we, as, as my kid gets older, I hope maybe, and then I become, and I'm in like a fucking wheelchair and whatever. And like, I hope they accommodate me in like when they're taking care of me, but I'm going to have to be mindful of the fact that like, I'm going to have to learn my kid's personality and who they are

and how they respond to things. And I can't just assume that they're going to want to like hang out the way I want to hang out. And like, am I going to like my kid? Is that something I kind of worry about? Because like, there's just no guarantee, but I'm going to love my kid. So if you're watching this someday, I love you. I'm going to get so much heat for this. They'll like probably challenge you to grow. You know, you might try new things. But yeah, we also, to your question, we talk a lot about parenting and like different things we want to try things that, you know, how, well,

now he was raised that she really remembered and appreciated. Like we talk about this a lot. I think all we really want to do is teach our kid or children, if we're lucky enough to have more than one, like to be good decision makers. If I, if we can do that as parents at the end of the day, just teach them the value of respecting themselves, thinking they are worthy of expecting people to prioritize their needs and also be selfless and humble, but just be able to make good decisions for themselves

at all aspects of their lives. That's all I really want to accomplish. That's it. Totally. Like a sense of intuition and like having them like, you know, like the trust your gut thing, like really creating a space

where they like learn to like what that means. Yeah. I don't want to be a helicopter parent and I want to, I want our kid to be able to make tough decisions. And I think that's something in today's society that parents have gotten away from, you know, where it's just like, you know, there's all these, like back in the day when our parents had kids, it was more of this kind of figure it out. You know, we weren't family planning and we weren't like, you know, we didn't have our college funds ready for us before we're out of the womb. Like some people are lucky enough to have and things like that. And all this, are we ready to finally have kids? Do we have a plan? You know, like, and I think that can be great if you're able to do that. But yeah, I think that that fear of failure or making sure, you know, and I know like shit with the way we treat Jeff, we're, we're helicopter dog parents, you know, so that I think it will be a challenge for us to not to, to be able to pull back. But if all I did is teach our kid to make good decisions for themselves, especially in difficult times, you know, because they're going to be faced with adversity and they're going to be put in

pressured situations and mom and dad aren't always going to be able to do that. And that's all I really want to do is teach my kid how to make good, strong decisions from themselves and the ability to learn from decisions they get wrong. That's all I really want to do. And if I do that, I feel like I've been a good dad. Absolutely. Well, I think someone else who would love some assistance making decisions. Is it texting office hours already?

Yeah. Sweating the wedding. Because you're office hours already? Yeah, sweating the wedding. Because you're not only having a baby, you're getting married. Oh my God. In case you needed a little bit more stress. Well, when we get back, for all you Swifty fans out there, Mary has some more thoughts

on the Scooter Braun drama that I found very interesting that we're going to get into right after sweating the wedding. So don't go anywhere because damn, Taylor called it. She wrote about it. Period. Well, right now, y'all know we're in New York.

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How's it going? Hi, my name's Sarah and I'm 27. My best friend from college is getting married and she did not give me a plus one. And I'm trying to decide if I want to go or not. Okay. Just because you don't have a plus one. Yeah, I guess there's more to it. Yeah, there's more to it because, you know, at first I'm thinking, well, you know, you're

not necessarily entitled to one. Because, you know, at first I'm thinking, well, you know, you're not necessarily entitled to one. But why do you feel like this is a kind of a slap in the face, so to speak? Sure. So I've been in a committed relationship for over five years now. The reason behind not getting a plus one was presented to me as they were just overbooked and didn't have enough room for any other people in the wedding, I guess. Um, but I know the real reason was because they, my boyfriend and her have differing political views. So they have argued and kind of, uh, butt heads over that in the past. So that's kind of more, there's more to it, I guess, in that way. Yeah. Have you talked with your friend about this?

I have. I, at first I didn't respond because I felt kind of uncomfortable because I feel like I'm a little bit of the mediator between their relationship. But when I reached out, I just told her, cause RSVP isn't due until the middle of the month. So I'm out, I just told her, um, cause RSVP isn't due until the middle of the month. So I'm like, I still have time, but I just want to acknowledge that I saw your message and that I'm considering everything, um, and that I have to travel out of state. So it's just a lot to consider. Um, so her response kind of came back firing at me and their arguments.

So she said that she doesn't feel comfortable with him there because he doesn't support her and her family and what they believe in. Yada, yada, yada. So, yeah. is there something specific that she is going through? Or is she just personalizing her beliefs as not supporting her? And you know what I'm saying? Like is, because like,

you know, someone might experience something that is personally affecting them. And then that could also be tied to common political discourse, um, where it feels, she feels more triggered by it. Or there are people who are just stand the right or stand the left. And they just fucking love arguing about it with people. And they just, they wear it on their fucking sleeves. And then, you know, this is who they are. I would say they're both, um, my boyfriend and her are both that wear it on their sleeves, fight about it on Facebook, super argumentative. So they're both obnoxious. Yeah. Yeah. And I'll admit that I'm not that way, but I know both of them are.

So a lot of that has just made them dislike each other without even really knowing each other. But I guess my biggest thing is that I'm in the middle of it. And my, when I brought it up to my boyfriend, um, he was just really, um, upset about it, I guess. And I wasn't really expecting that response from him because I didn't think he'd want to go anyway. Um, but his response kind of gave me a bad taste too, because I didn't know,'t know or not that I didn't know he was going to respond that way, I guess. But he made the point of if I wasn't invited to one of his friend's wedding after us being together for five years, how uncomfortable that would make me feel. Sure. And then when I put myself in those shoes, I agreed. So then I really started considering not going altogether just because I'd rather keep the

peace. I see this friend once every five years. I see my boyfriend every day. Um, so I just felt like to keep the peace. But then a part of me is like, what if one day I look back and I'm, I regret not going because whatever didn't work out or, you know, I guess I'm just pessimistic. I'm assuming your boyfriend's not home right now, right? No, I'm actually, um, at one of the hotels I work for. So I'm by myself. Because I'd love a chance to speak with him. I don't know if you'd like that.

No, it's a hip hop. It's a really interesting situation. Listen, it's her wedding. And I disagree with both of them. And the fact that they, I don't, I've gone on and on about this. You know, the fact that we live in a society where we, we, we've created enemies, true enemies, and we don't even see, you know, a difference of opinion. We see good and evil with people with different, you know, value systems. And we truly have decided that if someone disagrees with us, they're bad and they're, we shouldn't be around them and, you know, et cetera, et cetera.

And the fact that both your friend and your boyfriend are kind of the obnoxious, you know, diehards, so to speak, that kind of make everything about their political beliefs and kind of love egging people on. These two people should never have been talking politics to each other. And yet they clearly have, and they can't help themselves from doing it, et cetera, et cetera. And the fact that it's her wedding, I can get why someone who's as passionate as she is doesn't want to fuck with someone who clearly she finds to be just personally offensive. And your boyfriend, on the other hand, has played a role in that as well.

I actually think it's a good sign that he had the reaction that he did, where he felt that his feelings were hurt. It kind of showed a human side and it kind of showed that maybe there is hope in the sense that maybe this is an opportunity to realize that, you know, it's good to have conviction about what you believe that maybe like it's not the end all be all. And what is the end all be all is your interpersonal relationships and the people you have in your life and the people you make connections with and family and friends and their family and friends and creating your community,

et cetera, et cetera, that can go beyond just various beliefs. I think there's a potential solution here. And I don't know if your boyfriend's willing to do it, but if it bothers him so much, he has to A, first take responsibility where his feelings can be hurt, but he also has to recognize why would she want him there? She clearly, he has said things to offend her. She finds him personally offensive. He finds her personally offensive. So he can at least relate to how she feels about him because it's how he feels about her. So if nothing else, they can relate to how they feel about each other. And if it really hurts his feelings and if he can empathize with you and the situation you find yourself in would it be and i don't know it might not do anything i don't know but would it be

possible what if your boyfriend reached out and and to her through a letter or an email and say hey listen i know we've had our differences but clearly sarah cares about you she very want wants to be at your wedding this has been a conflict conflict. And I just want to apologize forever. Like, you know, we have our differences, but clearly you're a great person. You have been friends. We don't see eye to eye. But I hate that I, you know, this situation has caused conflict. And if you're willing, I'd love to accommodate, you know, Sarah to the wedding.

She wants to be there. And it's your day. I want to, you know, and just the wedding. I know she wants to be there and I, it's your day. I want to, you know, and just like, could this be the start of them agreeing to just shut the fuck up about their beliefs when they're around each other? Like, we don't always have to sit there and argue about politics and you can be in the same room with someone who just has different values than you have and you don't have to get into it and you don't have to like use every moment to like, are you, you know everyone agrees with me on that. But if he's interested in doing that, and if he truly is bothered by how this makes him feel and is bothered by the decision you have to make, it really is on him. It's not on her to make this work. It's her wedding. She doesn't have to accommodate him. But I do think this could be an opportunity to maybe mend some fences. It would require some humility and grace on the part of your boyfriend. I mean, I kind of agree with that. I think that

that would be good, but I don't know that either of them are willing to really like budge, but maybe. But I guess like looking forward now, an obstacle that's come up is that same weekend, my boyfriend's cousin has a wedding also. And it's that Friday. So flying to a different state, doing all that, trying to make everything work where I could just go to a wedding where my boyfriend's there too. Well, but if he has a wedding to go to, why don't you guys just go to two separate weddings? Yeah, but part of me wants to go where he goes i guess like i don't i would rather go to a wedding with someone it's uncomfortable to go to a different state by myself you know there's

just a lot more to it and i think i'm leaning towards no if things don't like resolve which i don't really foresee that well they're not going to unless yeah they're not going to magically she's not going to get over it and honestly i, I don't fault her. It's her, it's just her wedding, you know, like I wouldn't, if, if, if Natalie got in, you know, if some, if someone I knew offended Natalie, uh in families. But unfortunately, I'm in the minority, you know, in terms of that argument. But, you know, it's you're just going to have to decide. I think right now, just be careful that you're just not taking the more convenient, easy way out and doing the things where you said, well, I see him every day. I see him every five years. I'm not here to tell you how important that friendship is to you, but you did say it's a lifelong friendship. And once every five years is still something. And maybe it's once every five years now, because your lives are so busy and you're kind of at that part

of your life, but you just never really know. And I don't know if your friend's ever going to get married again. I'm certainly certain that she's not planning on it, but you not being there is something she is going to remember, you know? And I don't think your boyfriend is going to be as upset as she's going to be upset by you not going to his cousin's wedding because the fact that he does have something to do makes it easier on you to go to her wedding where you're just like, you know what? You got a family wedding. I got my family wedding. I know this sucks or whatever, but he's got to recognize that he has played or he can't just be the victim here. He can't be like, I can't believe I got uninvited. Like he knows why he's uninvited. If it really hurts his feelings, he has the opportunity

to extend an olive branch. And if he doesn't want to do that, that's fine. But if he doesn't want to do that, he doesn't get the throw of fit about his feelings being hurt. And I think that's fair for you to point out to him. Hey, it would mean a lot to me if you could try, but if you don't want to try, fine, but you don't get to have your hurt feelings if I'm going to still go and support my friend. And also you did just say it like you see your boyfriend every day. And this isn't just like a friend of yours birthday dinner, like this is a lifelong friend's wedding. And so I think missing that, regardless if you and your boyfriend work out,

missing that will always be something that kind of is in the middle of the two of you. Yeah. Like, is this worth killing a friendship? Cause I don't think it's going to kill your relationship. And I think you're, I think you're risking your friendship and I, you know, and so I don't think it's going to kill your relationship. And I think you're, I think you're risking your friendship.

And I, you know, and so I don't know. And I, and given it's her wedding, I think it's on your boyfriend to extend the olive branch, not the other way around. And if he does that and she gives him the old fuck you, then that kind of resets the conversation, you know, maybe then she is more like hey we tried you know like he that was a really gracious note he really humbled himself he was just like i just

wanted there and support you i'll shut the fuck up we have our differences but clearly you're a special person to sarah and i just want to accompany her to this wedding i i get why you've had your frustrations and humble himself to say i get get why I wasn't invited. I get it. I've, I said some things that I would, you know, that were upsetting and I'm sorry for that. And we may have our differences, but I hope we can have a relationship. I think my boyfriend has really changed his tune since the initial conversation, because when it did get brought up, like last week, he was more receptive and was like, oh, I just figured you were going to that

because initially he was so angry, but I think he was like, she's going to go because that's her friend. But I feel like in my mind, I'm almost talking myself out of going just because I would rather go to, again, go to a wedding where he can go. It's just because you're angry that he's not invited and you want to get back at her and be like, well, I'm just not going to go then. If like so choose like do you want the both you know me there then that means he has to come too which i totally understand but i think uh you have to put your pride aside and just be a good friend if being a good friend to her matters to you and show up to her wedding and support her. And I mean, you'll see your boyfriend on Monday, you know? True. And I think in the long run, like having your boyfriend reach out is you putting

yourself first because outside of this situation, the situation is coming to a head because of this wedding. But outside of it, these are two people that care about you and ultimately like shouldn't be arguing and putting you in this position. But it's on your boyfriend right now to be the one to lean in and apologize because it is her wedding. Right. And then the initial heat of everything, he said something along the lines of, okay, well then when we get married, I don't feel comfortable with her there. And then initially, you know, it's just, there's so much to it that i'd rather than and there's just two prideful people who offended each other and you know it goes people will so people surprise people when one person's willing to say to like reach out as an olive branch most people are receptive to be like they're kind of like oh okay well you're

not so so bad you know but most people are just too stubborn to they're kind of like oh okay well you're not so so bad you know but most people are just too stubborn to fucking do it so i'll be surprised if he really tries to extend the olive branch and writes her a gracious note and really kind of falls on the sword and kind of takes his pride out of it if she's not receptive in some way and knowing both of them really well i I know she would be super receptive of it, but just getting him to that point where he's going to follow his pride and just do it. He has no right to be offended if he's not going to do that. Yeah. Because that's just him being self-centered then, because he should use this as an opportunity. Like Natalie

and Mary mentioned that like, this is about you and your friendship. And he has played a role in this conflict. He is half responsible. And I'm sure your friend's also half responsible too, but it's her wedding. And she has the right to be like, I don't know if I want, because she's thinking, what a nightmare, what a nightmare to get married and have. And then all of a sudden I get a political heated exchange at my wedding. That's what she's trying to avoid. And she has the right to want to avoid that. So it's on him to say, you can trust me. I want none of that. We don't need to argue about this. Let's find common ground. I bet your friend and your boyfriend, if they really tried to sit in a room and if they were only allowed to focus on things that had in common, they would

find common ground. They're just not prioritizing that right now. I think it's on him to extend that olive branch. And it's a good sign he cares. And it's a good sign that he quite honestly, he was planning on inviting her. And that he doesn't want to, you know, so he has empathy. You know, he just has to be the bigger person. Being the bigger person is fun. You get to say you're the bigger person to yourself. At least he's going to say that to her.

But I think you should challenge him you're the bigger person to yourself at least he's going to say that to her but i think you should challenge him to be the bigger person and i think especially if like i know political stuff especially with like the role of like identity politics politics and like as like nick was saying at the beginning about how it is something that is so personal to so many people and it's like this huge indicator of values like i think with that with that, sometimes something that gets lost in the conversation is like the role of discernment and when it's like a good or opportune time to actually connect with someone, because it's like if the whole point of arguing about politics is to like is that you have like a very intense value and you it's upset, it's really upsetting to you that someone doesn't share that and you're trying to, kind of like convert them to that. Like there's also an important like level of self-awareness

of knowing when you're just like, no matter what you say, someone is not going to change their mind. And like, that is all to say that like, it is not always like silence and bystanding to be discerning about like when things come up. And I think for him, like just kind of framing it that way of not saying like, this isn't some big deal, but just saying it is simply ineffective to bring politics into this specific arena of life because of where you're both at and like how firmly you both stand in your opinions. Like, I think that's also an important part of the conversation in politics is like. I know some people don't feel safe with people who have really opposing political beliefs. And so this is not like to say that those people should be like forced to be with people they don't feel safe with people who have really opposing political beliefs. And so this is not like to say that those people should be like forced to be with people they don't feel safe with. But outside of that case, I think there's like a huge role in like humanizing and

connecting with like the other side of the aisle, so to speak. And it's an essential part of like, if we are actually going to solve anything, you have to understand people and understand how to get through to them. And I know that this is not some long game of him eventually convincing her within the political views. But I think like maybe just like going into that side of things and just like talking about the role of discernment. So that way you're acknowledging how important it is without saying, but don't make it important in this way, but just saying like, let's look at it through a different lens of like the importance of like connection and respect and how like that is the most conducive to like actually having like meaningful change with people. All right. Well, it sounds like we have an opinion. We think

he should reach out and humble himself and try to extend an olive branch if he's not going to do that, especially if he decides not to do that. Personally, I think we agree that you should go to her wedding. He should go to the cousin's wedding. The consequence of not going, I think, is far more severe than the consequence of going. I think, like you said, your boyfriend was expecting you to go. He already has something to do. And you're going to give him the opportunity to make it right. And him saying, I don't want to do that. You can call me, say, all right, I respect it. I fair, but like, I, I, I'm going to go to her wedding, you know, and if you don't want to write, that's fine. I'm not going to get mad at you and I'm not going to fight with you about it, but I'm just not ready

to say goodbye to this friendship yet. And, uh, I hope in the future, if you guys ever see each other again, you'll use that as an opportunity to just bite your tongue and consider my feelings and my friendships. And just, you know, you don't have to, like Amanda said, it's not your job to convince her. You guys, you know, you just go your separate ways. You're both good people. I'm sad that you guys can't get on the same page, but it's fine. You know, neither of you are going to change each other's minds. But I feel like that's, I think we're in agreement. Go support your friend, have a fun weekend and you'll spend the rest of your life with your boyfriend, hopefully. Yeah. True. That's good advice. And prove to yourself that like you are independent because

I think it's so easy in relationships to just get like out of practice of like doing certain things like travels, logistics, like it's like, oh, the buddy system and it's awesome. And then you have another person. And so to have that like taken away is like feels like uncomfortable, I think. But I also like the more it's like then taken away, the more it becomes like a scary thing. And so I think having this little moment of like, even if it is because of circumstances beyond your control, like being kind of pushed to like remind yourself that you are independent and that you can function and that you'll probably connect hopefully with some other like friends from college or people that you haven't seen in a

while. Like, I think there's also a way of looking at it where it's like, okay, I'm going to have some me time. And then I'm going to be so goddamn excited to see him when the weekend's over. Yeah.

Or, or get him to, you know, humble himself. Nick wants him to write. Nick wants him to write a letter but if he doesn't want to it's okay it's fine but like I just I think he needs to just for the like

just for future things I think like whatever with the wedding he might not come he might not even I think it'd be awkward for him to come at this point after everything that's been said and not being invited but for future stuff like I do want her to be invited to my wedding if him and i are to get married or whatever that may be um but yeah i should just

though and i'm leaning that way but the reality is you know i think we're a species that needs purpose in our lives and as society you know we're getting like a whole philosophical thing but like you know religion we just need purpose and people have found purpose through politics, you know, and that can be great. But like, sometimes we get a little carried away. beliefs that they feel very strongly about and they they can still have that but now they're realizing that's affecting other aspects of their lives and it's creating more consequence and drama than it needs to be and like you know maybe that maybe this is a great opportunity for your boyfriend to reset how he wants his purpose and his beliefs to affect all aspects of his life because like you said this like this if he's if they're both just hardcore and specifically your he wants his purpose and his beliefs to affect all aspects of his life. Because like you said, if they're both just hardcore, and specifically your partner,

because you're right, you only see your friend every five years. And if you end up marrying this guy, you're going to marry a guy who has a habit of being so divisive and getting in these types of discussions and discourse with people who don't agree with them. And it won't be the last person you have to deal with this type of conflict with. All right. Well, definitely keep us posted. We're dying to know what you decide to do. Yeah. Let us know what your RSVP says. One person or two people or no people. And we won't be mad. We'll just be disappointed if you don't take our advice. I'm just kidding. Whatever you decide to do, we want an update. We'll appreciate it. Okay. Sounds good. I will definitely update you guys.

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Get your discount. That's right. Text FILEZ to 64000. That's FILEZ to 64000. Message and data rates may apply. See terms for details. thousand that's files to 64 000 message and data rates may apply see terms for details uh mary uh you listened to our episode with with page and we were getting into the whole scooter bra and drama and page had this very interesting theory that i really thought made a ton of sense

and that theory just to recap to our audience was something around the fact that like so many of these kind of scandals in hollywood have usually centered around some sort of like misbehavior when it comes to like sexual sex or an act, you know, uh, sexual misconduct and things like that. But that doesn't seem to be the case with, with Scooter and page kind of brought up this theory about maybe it has to do with more money and finances and kind of shadiness around the manager and talent relationship that is, is like historically, there have been a lot of incidences of, of, of shady managers, you know, stealing from clients and things like that. And it made a lot of sense. And then you brought up the fact that as someone who is a Swifty stand, who not only enjoys your musics, but you are someone you're one of the

fan bases that really enjoys breaking down the lyrics of her songs because Taylor is known for writing in a lot of Easter eggs, as they say, to kind of almost tell her story through her music. Because, you know, it's one thing for like reality TV stars to come on a podcast and do like a tell all and be like, this happened. And, you know, but tell us are often kind of viewed as kind of scandalous or whatever, but Taylor has been able to express herself musically. Anyway, take it away. I mean, there's a lot here to unpack and definitely go on TikTok, go on Slifty Talk if you want to learn some more.

But she has in recent history, like three songs that are definitely about Scooter. Some are about Scott Borchetta, but like three are for sure about Scooter. Those three songs are? One is Mad Woman. That sounds like it's about Scooter already. The other is Karma. Obviously. And then the other one is Vigilante Shit. So

all three of those, like if you put them together, they kind of like paint a picture. Overall, the theme that we see is like Scooter is this kind of like paint a picture overall the the theme that we see is like scooter is this kind of like bully who values money over everything like over like artistry and over like relationships personal relationships in the last verse of mad woman she's like the master of spin has a couple side flings good wives always know oh because he got a divorce got a divorce and then she might know some stuff she also makes references to like a yacht and like i'm moving on

but like i breathe breathe flames and stuff she's got some like like you poke the bear yeah yeah kind of like watch out it's almost like a threat it's a little threat yeah yeah it's a little seems to be working. But even in like vigilante shit, like someone told your white collar crimes to the FBI. Yeah. Yeah. Well, also in vigilante shit. So like next you move on to vigilante shit.

She says that. But first she says she needed cold hard proof. So I gave her some. She had the envelope where you think she got it from. So she's saying like, I like. Needed proof. I told your wife. Oh, shit. That you were cheating on her.

Picture me. Wow. Do you think Taylor Swift was the one who maybe dropped the tea? Honestly, like that. I feel like that would be say. Yeah. He steals all of her music from her. And she's like, OK, well, you know what?

I know this about you. So let me just call up your wife. She'll take she'll take a call from Taylor Swift. But it sounds like Taylor came with the receipts, too. She didn't just come with rumors. She wasn't like, oh, by the way, I heard this. Yes. Well, because also when this song came out, people are also speculating maybe it was a Kim and Kanye situation because there was a photo of Kim with like an envelope.

And then it was all about like Kim got all the cars. Kim got the kids in the divorce, all this other stuff. So it's like all these men that have wronged Taylor. It's like she's coming back, baby. The white collar crimes line is very telling. I can totally see Scooter Braun like as a coke head yeah yeah yes absolutely i also just feels like like the venn diagram of people named scooter versus coke heads looking real close to a circle it's kind of manifest destiny so i feel like one of his

clients found out like some shady shit he was doing and pass it along and it's kind of trickling down his client list the fact that scooter did what he did to taylor and regardless of what you thought of it at the time you know other people were like well he has a right to do it or blah blah blah and swifty's obviously were like fuck you scooter that taylor swift is currently going through one of the most successful tours in the history of of music her star has never been brighter uh she is turning middle-aged men into swifties she has catapulted beyond like a niche you know you know group even even even the most successful celebrities like have their like niche fan base you know where it's like the swifties right you know and it's like this maybe a group of people large group but a group where now taylor is truly like

it's kind of everyone's a fan you know and it's and this is all happening while her biggest arch rival is not only like kind of going through it but it sure seems like you know granted it seems like skitter's rich so like he maybe he doesn't care but his his brand his star power his credibility everything has never been lower and if you believe in karma it truly this is of karma it's a it's a wild it's a wild it's a wild wild uh fascinating thing but it's like maybe he had to do some sketchy sketchy ass deals to make up for the fact that he spent 300 million dollars on her catalog i mean there's like and then karma people have been like really close reading you know i was an english major so people

are like you know really getting in there analyzing that like karma is the breeze in my hair on the weekend and that's like in reference to her tours and every time she like drops a new like TV like it's on the weekend so that's like your karma and she says like spider boy king of thieves and spider boy like SB Scooter Brown

she's such a clever writer she's the one my pennies made your crown because like he gets pennies from every stream from her songs so all those pennies add up to make his crown but she fucking hates him that song well yeah and that song is definitely mostly about scooter braun but the fact that that dropped in the same week that kanye got you know his deal with adidas taken away from him and his billion hood taken away from him because of that like is just amazing and she I recently re-watched her Folklore Long Ponds studio session and she's talking with Aaron

Desner who you know is like her music producer now and he was encouraging her during that album to like be okay with writing songs about more than one situation which she'd never really done before and so I feel like I mean one that's just made her songs like so much more complex and creative and amazing but you see these songs that can be about like probably carly and also about scooter and about scooter and kanye and then also about like can you break down carly claus what happened with them and why was her being at the show conspiracy though i mean i have no idea why she showed up to that show. And I saw she was passing out friendship bracelets with her name on it. Which is everything I need

to know about her. Carly Kloss handing out friendship bracelets with Carly's name on it? Yeah. At a Taylor Swift concert? Yeah. I don't like that at all. That's weird. Just back to the Kanye thing someone might need to fact check me but I'm pretty sure a scooter represented Kanye during the

whole like i made that bitch famous and like oh he lied about the phone call they fabricated the phone call oh yeah yeah so she's like like scooter she didn't like him prior to the sale yeah they parted ways in 2018 move they but they'd worked together for two and a half years up until that point. Speaking of Kanye, did y'all see that photo of him on a yacht getting head from his wife? And he's like pantsless.

What? I did not see this. The comments are like, North is on this app, everyone. Literally. It's all these paparazzi photos. Him and his wife are in Italy and he's on a boat and you just see her elbow like on his knee It's all these paparazzi photos. Him and his wife are in Italy. And he's on a boat.

And you just see her elbow on his knee. And then his butt crack. His pants are down. Is he standing or sitting? His whole ass is out. His whole ass is out. And then you see another shot from this way. Looking at Kanye's face. And you see his wife's head turned.

And so she's obviously in front of him just and there's other people. How is this legal? There's other people on this little boat. It's a river taxi. They had a driver and this like this unknown female friend. And then the article was like they parked the boat or they got off the boat and she adjusted her trench coat and then she grabbed the hand of the unknown female friend. And I'm like,

okay. So like the three of them are just kind of walking hand in hand on these streets after this pantless brigade. Yeah. His ass is on like the cold ass, like boat. Like a very funny. He's just getting public head. Yes it's not just in the photo but are

you saying like because my first thought is like how is it okay that paparazzi are able to take this photo but you're saying he's just like out in public yeah there's another boat like right next to him you also can't see anything other than his butt so it's not like you can see her actually giving head you just know his pants are down and she's in the assumed position. Correct. That's nuts. Yeah, of course, like all of these are like blurred out. But this is like and then there's a video and he like stands up and and he's it's his full ass.

It's not even like he was like, oh, I'm just going to stick it in a little fucking like in like and, and he's, it's his full ass. It's not even like, he was like, Oh, I'm just going to like stick it to the zipper. A little like fucking like in like Venice, Italy. A tiny, yes, a riverboat.

He's got his pants down to his knees. And yes, North is on that app. And he, that's his big thing is like you like about Kim, like you let North be on TikTok and make these TikToks. And sometimes there are songs that have cuss words in it or whatever and he gets so angry.

But you're in public getting head from your wife. Are any of you Hunger Games fans? Oh my god. I am. I am too. My favorite movie is Catching Fire. You're such a weirdo. enjoy i didn't read the books

but i enjoyed the movies you should i know i know uh but i can't read so dyslexic illiterate oh um illiterate did you guys literally so fucking stupid did you see the did you see the uh comments the new directors they're coming out with a prequel. Yes, which I've read. Oh, OK. And I'm in the process of writing. I thought were kind of fucking weird. Well, I feel like he's doing it because he obviously was worried, like, would anyone even watch this if Jennifer, you know, as Katniss isn't the lead?

And so I feel like he's trying to differentiate Rachel and Jennifer's characters by saying that Rachel's character is anti Katniss to just be like, don't worry. It's like Rachel Ziegler can't help but getting into like drama when it comes to like. Yeah. And honestly, it's probably a gift that she's not like allowed to do press right now for this movie which comes out in november i assume she won't be able to do any before the movie comes out because like i wonder what that would do to the movie if she was i got it i can't even imagine what she'd say like first she's coming after snow white now she's coming after katniss it's like yeah which the hunger games is like definitely ripe for criticism especially this one is about so it's a prequel and

it's about President Snow who's like the villain of the you know three like modern books I don't know I said modern you know what I mean the OG books the original trilogy the Old Testament it's famously um in the future it depicts what our future will become so yeah i i'm curious to see after the movie if they do like an after press release or something like that which she has to say about the character oh god i know because it is because director just talked about how this the new character like leads with her sexuality and kind of an introvert and I'm thinking like they're all portraying people,

they're all portraying teenagers. Like maybe Katniss wasn't not asexual. Maybe she was just like kind of stressed. But also when she kissed Gojira. She had to die.

Yeah, maybe she's just kind of going through a lot, you know, and like maybe just like fucking her partner wasn't top of mind. Who was the one that she kissed Peta right that was like the big

moment that's why everyone hates Gail so much is because Katniss is literally like fighting for her life and her family's lives in these like deathly games and Gail's like why won't you kiss me and it's like shut the fuck up Gail I want my more sexy time though it's not

rachel's character yeah now apparently she's gonna like go into the hunger games leading with her what does that mean leading with her sexuality she wears her sexuality on her sleeves she really is a performer she is she's done ready things she sings and it like gets her popularity in the games. And then President Snow. Happy birthday, Mr. President. This is only like the 10th Hunger Games or whatever in this book. And so they have all these like rich capital kids be the mentors for the first time to like the contestants. And so he is paired up with her.

But you can imagine from her perspective, she's like, this guy's going to help me more if if he likes me so why don't i just like swish my manipulator did you see like another like kind of controversial but in a different direction but semi-related was did you see that jessica simpson was getting a lot of flack because her 11 year old wore a crop top and people were just like generally shocked and angry i didn't see that but were they like what were they angry about i think they were like how dare you like like this like as a as a parent it's your job to like when your child is young kind of like protect them from like sexualizing themselves or like just like being generally like more like revealing but i i do feel like i'm like haven't we gotten over that like as a society not it's it's society sexualizing the child it's not the child sexualizing herself like she's 11 she doesn't

know like what i mean i didn't know what any of that shit made at 11 it's like when he thinks the crop top's cool it crop tops cool yeah that's like what's trending everyone's wearing them she's just like part of like i don't think she's like what's trending everyone's wearing them she's just like part of like i don't think she's like i want to like show off my belly what about like they're just a lot of fucking disgusting sick predators out there but you can't like block every like they're the creeps you can't like stop living your life because there's creeps on every corner no yeah no i get that i mean it's i think it is it's a complicated discussion i think i'm sure like jessica she's had such like a crazy relationship with the media criticizing her body

it's like well what does that does like i mean just like you can't wear this tell her daughter about her body okay this isn't like she didn't just go to like the farmer's market in a crop top they're like at an event. They're posing for a photo. This is like she's wearing someone's clothes. And she was styled by someone. This isn't her just going out on the streets of LA wearing... People are weird.

Bring your Barbie to work day is what Simpson's caption was. I think I'm most terrified about when it comes to like having any type of public life and being a kid of being a parent is parent shaming is alive and well and and everyone's passionate about it and it's like like we were talking about earlier it's like it's nice to get feedback and we love sharing our story and it's you know we love to be vulnerable when it makes sense especially if you know like we were just posting stuff out stuff like some content on instagram of like natalie just kind of being hungry and you know and and kind of going through it and a lot of people responded wonderfully and then they found it really relatable. And then there's always the,

you know, critics out there will be like, Oh, you know, like now I was saying, and it's just, it, it,

it's draining, you know, it's draining and everyone has their opinion on how to raise certain things. In nowadays, like they were talking about before, it's just like, there's so much information out there. You don't do anything or,

you know, it's just like, and somehow we all raised healthy kids with far less knowledge back in the day and everyone was fine. Yeah. It's like when I, when, when I found out that I was pregnant, all I've really heard is like, okay, you can't have sushi raw, you know, like you can't have deli meat, right? Like I've heard those things before. So I'll definitely stay away from those. And then I find out a couple months in, oh, you also, you have to change your shampoo and conditioner and like your skincare routine.

If it has a certain, like, I had no idea that there's just the things that you put on your face in your hair could somehow affect the baby that you're growing in your. And I just feel like there's so much that you can do and there's so much that you could not do. And I don't it's like my mom definitely wasn't changing her shampoo and conditioner when she was pregnant with any of us. wasn't changing her shampoo and conditioner when she was pregnant with any of us but i feel like now we're just so like so granular with our like yeah everything you should or shouldn't do and if you're one of those people who like gets caught doing it whether you know about it or not like the fucking people just come out with so many fucking it's scary opinions it's um fun i'm looking forward to it i think it's to be a wild ride. We know Nick loves to stir a pot.

We love to stir a pot. Anything else we want to talk about before we say goodbye? Well, I was going to maybe impose my happy birthday ritual of I think everyone should say something nice about the birthday girl because I feel like that is a good birthday tradition that I will go to bat for. Even though it's uncomfortable, I get that it's kind of uncomfortable. Natalie's pretending not to like this but it's her absolute favorite thing literally let's go everyone has three rounds

Nick why don't you start no I should go last I feel like I do feel like you should be the closer for this I can start. Natalie I feel like you're one of the most authentically confident people I've ever met and I think it manifests in like sometimes like a very quiet think it manifests in like, sometimes like a very like quiet way. But it's like not necessarily like always like a big confronting confidence is

just like the way you move through the world. I think you just have this like inherent sense of what you're okay with what you're not okay with. And it just feels like you always have like the confidence and like self knowledge to assert that. And I've always been in awe of the way that you can just kind of like be there and be very like quietly confident. And I like just like what I like inherently like intriguing person you are. Wow. Thank you. I don't feel like I am that at all. So that is so nice to hear. Wow. No, Natalie is the best because she can literally become friends with everybody. And like she'll have like her little accents and her little like funny jokes.

And I feel like she has this innate ability to make people feel like they're at home and they're comfortable and they're confident. So I think that's an awesome thing about you. Oh, my God. I love this game. Yeah, I feel like I haven't even known you for very long, but you've been so kind and welcoming and so gorgeous and funny. So it's like, oh, my God, it is real. You can be both and you are proof. It's incredible. Thank you.

I will, I do want to say I met, I was walking on the street to meet a friend of mine for lunch yesterday and I saw this stunning girl walking towards me and she's wearing like a workout out. She might've just like left Pilates or something. And her body is insane. It's giving hourglass.

You know what I'm saying? So I, of course I'm like, I like your body's insane. It's giving hourglass. You know what I'm saying? So I, of course, I'm like, I like your body's insane. I have to tell you. And she was like, Oh my God, I know who you are. And I was like, Oh my God, I like, I love you. And she's like, No, I love you. And then we just chatted for the longest time. And we like, we wanted to be friends. But yeah, I, I'm definitely not afraid to tell someone when I think you're, you're very good at complimenting people. I mean, it was genuine. It was, I like was shot. I had, I was like, she took my breath away. I had to let her know. I couldn't just keep on going with my day, you know? Um, I'm like, where to start? You're such like a, an amazing person.

I love you so much. Um, but you take like the smallest little moments and you make them just so much more special and much more exciting i love being around you thank you best don't really make derek say something yeah i'll say something i feel like you have a really strong like taste and preference and know like a good sense of design and know why you like those designs and like obviously like the studio has had a lot of inspiration. So it's really cool to like not only have a defined palette, but also like be able to back up and know why you're making this decision. So it's a really good skill to have. Appreciate it. That means so much coming from you,

Derek. Natalie has excellent. Mary has also excellent taste. Yeah. I think these two people became friends through their taste. I think you're just the greatest period all right next time retweet everyone uh you're my most favorite person to be around and you're the best part of my day and um i love uh starting a family with you and um i think you're gonna be

an amazing mom and a great wife and you're a great partner already. Thanks, honey. Happy birthday, babe. Thanks. Can't wait to have a baby with you. Have you panicked? Not really. It is kind of starting to sink in a little bit

that I will be 25. Oh my God. Old. No, it's just I feel like the only reason it is a little like, whoa, is just because 25, I feel like will just be such a big year with getting married and having a baby. That's a lot happening at once. But fuck, let's do it. Let's do it.

I'm on board. So, yeah, hopefully it won't be boring after this year. Well, we'll just renew our vows every year and have a baby every year i cannot wait well happy birthday babe i love you well don't forget we have another episode of better date than never live tonight at 9 p.m we'll be calling in from new york but ally and amanda and genevieve will be rocking and rolling with a bunch of great stories from our, well, from Faw Club, because, you know, Better Date Than Never has turned into this like community of people who love talking about their sexual escapades and dating stories.

So be sure to tune in to that. Don't forget, we have another update special dropping tomorrow on Vile Files Plus, along with our Pop Culture Roundup. And don't forget we are dropping recaps of Vanderpump. So if you're going back and watching from Season 1, we've just done Season 1. We'll be starting Season 2 next week. So check out Vile Files Plus for all the amazing bonus content available to y'all. It's free to sign up.

Just go to VileFiles.com to do so. Hope you enjoyed this episode. Subscribe, tell your friends, all that fun stuff. Sending your questions to AskNick at TheVowFiles.com for all things Sweating the Wedding, Texting Office Hours, AskNick, all of the above. We appreciate all your support to the show.

We love you, and we'll be back next week. So with Labor Day coming, we're going to push the first two episodes a day, so AskNick will be on Tuesday, Reality Recap on Wednesday. Thursday's staying on Going Deeper. So just know, so changing in some programming. There you go. Bye.

Bye.