The Viall Files - E707 Going Deeper with JWoww Plus Bachelor Pt. 2, Brittany Mahomes’ Boundary, and the Pippen Jordan Split

Episode Date: February 15, 2024

Welcome back to The Viall Files: Going Deeper Edition! To start things out, the household gets together to talk about recent headlines - such as Brittany Mahomes asserting boundaries with Jackson Mahomes, and Larsa Pippen and Marcus Jordan breaking up. We also recap Tuesday’s Part II episode of The Bachelor. Then, we are joined by JWoww to talk about her Jersey Shore, parenting, producing movies, and potentially going to Nick and Natalie’s wedding. Finally, we have a Texting Office Hours caller whose friend has become obsessed with her, and she isn’t sure how to distance herself.  “I think the statute of limitation is up, so I’ll let it happen!”  Start your 7 Day Free Trial of Viall Files + here: https://viallfiles.supportingcast.fm/  Please make sure to subscribe so you don’t miss an episode and as always send in your relationship questions to [e-mail] to be a part of our Monday episodes. Listen To Disrespectfully now! Listen on Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/disrespectfully/id1516710301 Listen on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/0J6DW1KeDX6SpoVEuQpl7z?si=c35995a56b8d4038 Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCCh8MqSsiGkfJcWhkan0D0w To Order Nick’s Book Go To: http://www.viallfiles.com  If you would like to get some texting advice on Office Hours send an email to [e-mail] with “Texting Office Hours” in the subject line! To advertise on the show, contact [e-mail] or visit https://www.advertisecast.com/TheViallFiles  THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSORS: ZOA Energy - Available online and at a store near you. Find out where you can find it at https://www.ZOAEnergy.com and fine retailers like Amazon, 7-Eleven, Costco, Circle K and more. Hungryroot - Right now, Hungryroot is offering The Viall Files listeners 40% off your first delivery and free veggies for life. Just go to https://www.Hungryroot.com/viall to get 40% off your first delivery and get your free veggies. Helix Sleep - Helix is offering 20% off all mattress orders AND two free pillows for our listeners! Go to https://www.helixsleep.com/viall and use code HELIXPARTNER20. This is their best offer yet and it won’t last long! With Helix, better sleep starts now. Rocket Money - Stop wasting money on things you don’t use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to https://www.RocketMoney.com/VIALL  Episode Socials: @viallfiles @nickviall @jwoww @alison.vandam @dereklanerussell @leahgsilberstein @justinkaphillips  

you're crazy what's going on everybody welcome back to another exciting episode of the vile files going deeper edition i am your host nick joined by household, we got our sweet boy, Justin. We have Allie. We have Leah. How's everyone doing? Pretty good. It's Valentine's Day.

It is. We are recording this on Valentine's Day. Yep. Wearing pink. Yep. Yeah. Just had a lovely photo shoot with, uh, we had River's first photo shoot. So she was basically a model now.

I saw that. You know, it was a little like the little nude baby like in the palm of your hand yeah I'm a big sucker for those yeah I almost cried a couple times

is she tiny right now cause she's you said palm of your hand she has to be bigger well she's bigger than the palm of my hand but yeah she's still pretty tiny

yeah she's also just like an incredibly well behaved baby it's amazing she's like not only gorgeous but incredibly well behaved is she well behaved or is there nothing she can do to make you mad incredibly well behaved is she well behaved or is there

nothing she can do to make you mad no she actually is objectively well behaved so far like malaria again don't want to give anything too much away we got right we got nanny's birth story next thursday on going deeper little preview for that we do have another bachelor episode we have to cover so we'll do that obviously in this intro uh we got jwoww is our special guest today super excited to have jwoww aka also known as jenny uh i wish i had a nickname like jwoww it was one of the cool nickname we'll make you one lunches was a nickname of mine in high school explain explain it when i was in high school senior year you get to you know you can you don't really have to go to all your you know you can kind of leave school sometimes or leave for lunch.

And me and my friends would go to our respective houses. And then we'd go to my house for lunch and kind of eat out of the cabinets. And then we'd always have juice boxes for the little ones. My brother Luke at the time was a very sweet boy. Always, I mean, he's still a sweet boy. But we would drink the juice boxes. And my brother Luke would go, Nikki, those are for our lunches. So then my friends started calling me Nikki Lunches and then that turned into Lunches.

I like it. Other than that, yeah. That's not a great nickname. No, mine is. It is a nickname. My husband calls me Large. Large? Because those are my initials.

Those are my initials. It's cute. It's cute. It's not cute. What are your initials? LRG. Okay. He's buying some vowels. He's definitely buying some vowels. It's a stretch. It's a stretch. What are your initials? LRG. Okay. He's buying some vowels.

He's definitely buying some vowels. It's a stretch. It's a stretch. I hate it. What's his nickname? Dumpling? Slim Dan. Slim Dan.

Yeah. Well, that's his artist name, so it's also his nickname. Oh, it's his artist name. Yeah. Slim Dan. Slim Dan. It's a cute one. And he calls you Large.

And he calls me Large. I got the worst. Large and Slim Dan? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. You he calls you large. And he calls me large. I got the worst. Large and Slim Dan? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. You know what? I have never thought about that before right now. That just dawned on you?

Well, you just said it, and yeah. Sitting in a tree. Before we get to Bachelor, what else we got? Let's see. We forgot to mention this on Reality Recap. Over Super Bowl weekend, Brittany Mahomes givingomes the uh the heisman so to speak the stiff arm the boot who was britney with by the way she seemed didn't i we didn't i didn't really recognize i mean i'm sure she has plenty of friends i don't recognize but she was at some

club in vegas at a table popping bottles she had her security detail i don't know how regular her detail is maybe that security guy was even part of the club and not even her detail. But Jackson Mahomes came up in the whole kind of classic, do you know who my brother is? And security turned him down. And I looked over to Brittany. It seemed so perfect that it was almost like a skit. The way she looked was just like, oops, sorry, nothing I can do. I really quite loved it. It looked like it was choreographed. It did look very choreographed.

And then she immediately started dancing. Went right back to dancing. If Brittany Mahomes can set a boundary with Jax Mahomes, anyone can set a boundary with an in-law. And that's what it comes down to. Sometimes we don't pick our in-laws. Well, in his perfect world, she would have been like, oh, no, no, no, no, no. We know him. And then pulled him in, right? Yeah.

Wow. Well, in his perfect world, she would have been like, oh, no, no, no, no, no. We know him and then pulled him in. Right? Yeah. Well, but he the book on Jax Mahomes is that he is the stereotypical athlete sibling where they serve no real purpose in life other than being just the sibling of the famous person. seem to be any motivation for any personal accomplishment. They have no problem just being the brother of the athlete and a shitty one at that. Obviously, his shenanigans have been well documented, which have been anything from obnoxious to allegedly criminal. And is he still dealing with that sexual assault allegation? So he was arrested on three counts of aggravated sexual battery, which is a Class A felony, and one count of battery in relation to an incident that took place at a Kansas City restaurant in February of 2023. That happened on May 3rd.

Of this year. And that's when he was dealing with that account, still in May. Well, I say good for... I if britney got the okay from patrick it's like hey i'm friends with taylor now can associate i can't associate well and do you find it interesting that his denial from the vip area came hours after reports that he was spotted socializing with kayla nicole who's travis kelsey's ex-girlfriend he was social socializing with her. Which happened first? The diss happened first? The diss happened after. No, there was reports that he was hanging out with Kayla

and then hours later he wasn't allowed in the VIP section. And you can watch him tell the bouncer my brother is Patrick Mahomes and that's when Brittany was like, I don't know and kept dancing. That was the best I don't know, ever. I don't know. What a queen.

We are Brittany Mahomes fan club in this household. And I strongly feel like she has been taking way too much shrapnel from Jackson over the years. And congrats to her. Now she's a gracing Sports Illustrated swimsuit. Anyways, hats off to her. I'm glad that she's been able to get the green light from patrick just being like i can't deal with this shithead anymore not today she looks good and even shit like hanging out with travis's ex it's like why what what a fucking

clout chaser like it's just like one bad decision after another you know family will always be your family and you'll always love your family you may not even like your family but that doesn't mean you always have to include your family because even your family can be a liability, especially from a public figure standpoint. And like, if your family is a social liability, then you have to set boundaries. And we always get, you know, we get calls all the time for ask Nick and it can be tough. Sometimes you got to do it. And hats off to Brittany Mahomes for that was the of all we waited so long for her to do this

because I think all the conversations have been like why are you putting up with this shit yeah and the havoc go down in this manner where she just was like

I don't know and then immediately starts dancing before Jackson even leaves is yeah she humbled him without saying anything

that was a powerful thing I really wonder what the I wonder if there was fallout after that. Yeah, I wish they had panned back to him just to see like, if he was like,

what the fuck? I mean, Patrick and Jackson seemed close, but I mean, if it were my sibling, I'd be like, dude,

you are a liability. So grow up, start behaving, start acting like an adult, stop making bad decisions. Every decision you make, Jackson, is drama.

It's just drama and it's the shit I don't need. So, yeah. I just respect for Brittany to doing that. We forgot to cover that on RR and I just wanted to give hats off to her. And then the new heights came out. I was gonna say. Yes. Nicodamus. Nicodamus.

Nordodamus. What is it? Who's the guy who... Nostradamus. The guy who predicts the future Nostradamus that's what I'm trying to say Nicodemus like where are we going anyways it sounds like I kind of nailed it yeah they could have just inserted

our audio but that was the obvious move I mean I you know I don't think I went really out on a limb there by predicting something that was it would have been a stronger move if I predicted him being like, you know what? Fuck that, man. Like, I'm going to do me. And then he had, he done that.

That'd have been a stronger prediction. But this was kind of an obvious one. This was. He had to. Yeah. He kind of had to. But you called it nonetheless. Glad I did.

Nail it. I'm, I'm in, I'm in, I'm in their head. Basically. They watched the show. They were like, oh, yeah, that's what we should do. Before we do our podcast, let's ask Nick. Let's ask Nick. I'm glad I could come through for Jason and Travis.

You're welcome, guys. Congratulations, Travis, on the Super Bowl and love. I did see a headline that Travis was going to do her european dates with her which i guess works out timing wise because if his season is over he can kind of travel oh my god yeah now that they're now that his season's done it's going to be very fun to watch this relationship unfold in a different way because you know travis being a seasoned vet i think younger players will get into like they'll take a couple weeks off get into their off-season program you know really try to take the next leap in their development tra Travis, I mean, he has cemented

himself as arguably the greatest hitter of all time. He's resting his body, especially as older players, as they get older, rest and relaxation is just as valuable, if not more, than more reps and more practice and things like that. So he's going to definitely take some downtime. He's going to relax. He's going to party. Is there a lot of downtime between a Super Bowl and like the start of a season? Well, off-season programs in the NFL will start May as early as like, I want to say March or April. They call them OTAs and then mini camps and things like that. They start around March, April-ish. So there's not a ton of downtime. But he has at least like two or three months to like tag along. But also like a lot of those,'s called mini camps and OTAs are they're not mandatory, even though a lot of teams will have all their players.

But players like Travis Kelsey, veterans like that often miss those types of practices because they don't need it. They don't really need it. Yeah. So I think I'm very much looking forward to seeing this relationship unfold now that Travis's season is done and you get to see Travis travel and kind of, you know, it seems like Taylor was very much on downtime, spending a lot of time in Kansas City when she wasn't working, you know? she'll be in Melbourne then she has Sydney then she goes to Singapore but her last Singapore date is March 9th and then she doesn't pick up again in Paris until May 9th so they will have like two months in the spring

Nana and I were talking about maybe trying to do the Spain one cause you haven't seen it right? I'm not seeing it is Thursday May 30th we'd have to bring Natalie's mom and the baby to watch Thursday, May 30th. We'd have to bring Nellie's mom. And the baby? Well, yeah. Well, yeah, to watch.

Got it. Got it. Yeah. Nellie's mom's coming on her honeymoon. Yeah. Does that mean River's going on the honeymoon? Well, yeah. We're not leaving our baby.

Wow. Nice. But her mom's coming to help so that Nellie and I can have a long time. An actual honeymoon. Yeah. Enjoy it. Oh, a breakup in Bravo world. We got Larsa and Marcus have called it quits.

Fresh off their appearance on Traitors. Yeah. Do you think it was Traitors that really did them dirty? Maybe he thinks she had something to do with him getting sent home. Do you think that's what it was? You sent me home. I know it was you. I think it was funny that everybody else thought

that at the time and she's like why would i send home my boyfriend every public relationship has holes you could pick at and things like that certainly nally and i you know we have our critics a lot of people have been like oh that's not gonna work out you know for all the reasons but that being said it's not like marcus jordan dating michael jordan's former teammate scotty pippen's ex-wife was necessarily a relationship that i think people would bet on that had a lot of drama built into that relationship i mean for that relationship even to unfold to even to be considered you you you must love drama you you love a mess. She made this breakup very messy too. Because we all know about this because of her Instagram story.

Out of nowhere, she posted a story saying, the man you choose to be your partner affects everything in your life. Your mental health, your peace of mind, your love inside you, your happiness, and how you get through tragedies. Your success, high-roader children will be raised and much more. Choose wisely. Then she posted an Instagram poll and said, should your friends unfollow your ex yes or no so she's just like feeling the fire she's definitely feeling it's an alleged breakup it's not necessarily confirmed yet well so larsa

if you want to fuel it on the vile files here's your seat her where are we at with her and marcus we are waiting on reply okay larsa, answer. Answer my email. She's messy, that's for sure. First come, first serve. Larsa and Marcus. Do you think she would answer your DM if you just DM'd her? Possibly. Would you have voted yes or no to should your friends unfollow your ex?

What's your thoughts? Should your friends unfollow your ex? Situational? I'm going to say, yeah yeah situational um if something actually happened yeah maybe potentially it's just like i i know i always like to take the high road in general because i just feel like it's kind of petty in nature and i always not in part just in just you know me taking the high road isn't always me being the bigger person. It's not coming across as that I care.

It's operating on the kind of plane of indifference. So making your friends unfollow your ex is the opposite of indifference. It's in the drama category. It's in the petty category. So I would rather come across as i go fuck do what you want i'm unbothered by this you know it's like either a combination of that or like i you know me and my we're not we're no longer together but i wish them the best it's just not for me yeah i would rather have that energy you know that being said if if we broke

up for a reason and my ex did some shit there there are times when I would want my friends to set a boundary, take a stand and, and let people know, uh, let, let my ex know where I stand or they stand rather. So I think it's situational. Yeah,

for sure. I would love to be in a situation not to care and not to request that. Yeah. Yeah. The opposite of love is indifference, not hate. There you go. I mean, speaking of drama, Bachelor, the part two.

It's part two. God. How many, do we have to do a lot of these two weeks? I hope not. I don't think so. I think they did this because of Valentine's Day, right? That and Maria and Sydney. Like, I feel like that was the drama

that they wanted to, like, flip that. I don't know if that ended. Maybe some kind of programming. Because it is on next Monday. It's not like they have to skip next week or anything i wonder if it's a bonus episode or like if we still have the same amount of episodes and they just did i'm sure they i'm guessing the same amount of episodes my guess it has something to do with maybe the back end of like scheduling maybe yeah who knows or they had so much content they just had to like add an extra i mean not i

mean kelsey i think she wins i i'm right now gonna say kelsey's my uh my horse you've liked her since day one i liked her since day one made me cry this episode but talking about her mom and like that that was that was a story you know it was. And to hear she was fighting back genuine tears. It was a beautiful story. And she delivered it in such a beautiful way. I didn't feel forced. Maria's story felt a bit forced. Did you think so?

I liked it. What was her story? Her story was like, I don't take these fights so seriously because I've faced death in the past, personally. She said she was one years old. Yeah, she was one. And she got in a car accident with her mom and she was pronounced dead. Pronounced dead, yeah. And then her mom kind of wasn't able to bounce back so quickly and their relationship has felt the effects of that.

But we were actually going to ask you what you thought about general timing of telling your traumatic story to the bachelor or bachelorette because... If you have to tell it on a first... Well, I mean, usually I would say if you have to tell your traumatic story, I would say on your first one-on-one or certainly not even on a one-on-one, then you know you're not winning.

Especially if you are being encouraged to tell your story. Are you talking about Maria? Anyone, really because it's like christina on your season was like trying to tell you about her traumatic story and nick was like don't hold on to it until you get your one-on-one i was like wait for your one-on-one wait for your one-on-one uh so if you are allowed to tell your traumatic story uh early then chances, this isn't always the case because my first one-on-one was with Danielle and that was, and she told a very sad story about her, her ex passing.

Right. And they very much wanted that story told on the first date. So it really, it varies. The longer you can wait, the more you are end game, you know, the more you are an actual competitor. I agree because then they get to know you first and then when you tell your story after. There's a rapport.

Yeah, there's a type of chemistry. There's at least some kind of emotional connection. I mean, you can barely build an actual emotional connection on The Bachelor, but the first time you have a date, that means that for whatever reason, this season seems to be like everyone...

Every second. Everyone has something. It's like they got all the women there and then like, all right, here's how this is working. Everyone's telling their story.

You know, like this bum rush Joey. Well, then I also wonder how Joey goes and navigates that because sending people home is that much harder when they've told you

this story about their life. I don't know. I don't know. I was really bummed. I'm going to critique Joey here. I just wanted him to send Rachel home. And it had nothing to do with, nothing against Rachel.

It was just more like up until her one-on-one, I didn't, you know, remember her, which it seems like they have a really strong connection after the date, but no one's been sent home

outside of a rose ceremony. There's been no traumatic exit there's been no like there's been besides sydney right because she was outside of the rose ceremony that was a two-on-one though you were hoping he would send her home there's been no joey hasn't sent anyone home outside the format of the show you were hoping that he would send her home when they had extra time no i was hoping he would not give her their date on the one-on-one on a two-on-one you have to send someone i mean you don't don't have to. There's technically no rules. I mean, but that's the format of the show. You go on a two-on-one, someone gets sent home or

both of them get sent home. But no, Joey didn't send both of them home. He sent one of them home. Everyone else has gone home on a rose ceremony. There's been no interaction where Joey's sitting down with someone. They're having some sort of conversation. And in that moment, Joey's like, you know what? You're not my person. No offense. You seem lovely, but I just don't think there's a fit here. And it's not because anything traumatic is happening or drama, dramatic or anything like that, but just Joey being honest and realizing that this person's not their person. It's hard to do. You know, I did that a lot and i just i thought it would be more authentic but to me that just joey the people pleaser wanting to be kind of nice you know it comes across as super nice it very much does but it's less authentic you know it's it's also

the easy way out it's much easier to not give someone a rose than to actually say, hey, listen, you know, I just don't think this is it. Can I walk you out? You know? Yeah. And there's just no way he's having all these one-on-ones and realizing with all these women that there's a strong connection. And to me, when a bachelor or a bachelorette doesn't send anyone home outside of the format

of the show you know it makes their actual connection seem a little less authentic now just a personal gripe so you don't feel like they had a connection they seem actually actually at the end of the date it's i don't know joey's seems into her i mean the whole like slow burn and whatever it's you know that's a move well he said he was like we did everything backwards because he said we had our first dance and then we like got married and then now we're here just dancing. I actually think she might go far now. I think so too.

I didn't want him to send Kelsey home. She's been my front runner the whole time. And it was just more when we got to this date. Okay, we're in episode five. He's had multiple one-on-ones. No one's been sent home outside of the format. It's like it's time for a breakup. He's not breaking any rules yeah it's time for an awkward messy breakup it's time for you know i need to cry walking you out a sad exit you know right now we're just like oh you know

autumn walks away bye you know medina but also medina seems like a very sweet person she does yeah i think she got caught up in the drama so actually quite the opposite I think Medina is on her way out because other than being caught up in the drama she is the drama there was nothing but no she's not drama okay so she immediately diffused it she removed herself from the drama she seems very sweet soft-spoken Joey doesn't have a strong connection with her relative to the other ones and it's kind of like that's that's collateral damage she's not really her relative to the other ones. And it's kind of like, that's collateral damage. She's not really offering anything to the show. The reason why Jess is there and Medina is not

is not because Joey's more into Jess than Medina. It's because Jess is part of drama with Maria. Yeah, but Jess got in the fight with Maria after getting the drama roses. In the group date roses, do you love roses or drama roses? And Maria's was a drama rose. So question, was Maria wrong for stealing more time with Joey?

Of course not. When you're talking to a guy who often on Andy season had roses going to the rose ceremony, you're there to build a connection. This is a show where you have the expectation is engagement at the end. You have limited time. You have no time. And the idea that you're supposed to, because you're safe, is this is not about getting to the next week. It's about building

a connection. So if you're trying to build a connection, who gives a crap if Jess or someone else hasn't had time? By the way, the way they showed Maria interrupting Jess, that's how every conversation starts. There is always someone interrupting someone. They just showed it this time. Every time you see someone sitting down with someone else, they interrupted someone. Every time. Every single time it happens.

And the only difference is sometimes they show it, sometimes they don't. Interesting. And when they had Maria interrupt Jess, obviously they knew that Jess was cracking. They knew that Jess was becoming more insecure. Clearly, she has no connection with Joey. She's melting down.

They have Maria go and interrupt her. They show it because they kind of set the stage. Maria interrupts Caitlin. And then Jess gets mad. And Caitlin was actually really nice about it. Are you sure it was Caitlin? Yeah, because Caitlin and Joey were talking and then Maria came up and interrupted Caitlin, who was really nice about it. Again, that is because it happens every time.

They all do that with each other. So they all go back and they say, yeah, Maria stole him. Or Maria came in. They'll be sitting down and be like, oh, who's talking now it's like oh maria is oh maria is and meanwhile jess is like i haven't had any time with him tonight maria's got a rose she's talking to him now i might not get a time and the more you cry about not getting time and the more you complain about not getting time you can guarantee not to get time they will oh then then that's when jesse walks in it's like oh sorry the cocktail party's over right you will never get time when you complain about not getting time.

It's giving disrespect. Didn't Jess say that? And then she calls her a bee. Oh, they're melting down. So it's Jess. Leia. Leia. I'm jealous.

I mean, this is one of the first seasons I remember that the show is not siding with the house. You know, I said last episode, the house is the bully. You know how jealous I am? I get PTSD when I watch shows like this. Like every season, people who don't get attention get jealous of people who get attention. You know, not everyone who gets attention. It's usually someone who might be,

Maria is clearly, Maria does Maria. Maria is this confident in herself. She's quote unquote, not, you know, she is clearly, Maria does Maria. Maria is this confident in herself. She's quote unquote not, you know, she's not saying not there to make friends, but she's just like, I'm going to do me. She's not, she's not there to seek the approval of all the other women, assuming she has her own friends. And it's kind of like, she seems to be making an approach of, if I make a friend, great. But that's not the priority. And these other, you know, the Sidneys. The Jess, the Leia. The Leias. It's like they And these other, you know, the Sidneys. The Jess, the Leia.

The Leias. It's like they prioritize manners over, you know, it's like, and I don't mean manners in a good way. It's just like, you just have to be polite and respectful and, you know, don't want to ruffle any feathers. Like, that's not how you build a connection. Yeah. How do you fall in love?

Well, I fell in love with someone who just like, they shared me. Yeah. Yeah. They shared me and that's our love story you know i mean leah's just a villain like she's turned into the new villain she came out of nowhere you know in the end of last episode and then throughout this whole episode that's all editing too i mean you know some of her like itms when she is you know like kind of talking about her look or you know she's

being confident like they have that on everybody and what did she really do she didn't do anything they could have aired that in a way that was charming you know but they it's just how they use that footage so they did her dirty and like also like the the cryon of jealous of maria oh my god i would have wished that on the seasons on caitlin season or or andy season when i was getting all this attention and i was getting heat from all these guys and yeah did i feel like it was like you guys are just fucking like worry about yourselves i'm worried about me stop giving me shit because you're not getting time i would have loved to have a jealous of nick yeah because

that's how it felt to me you know but here's the show usually the show is telling you how to feel via music and things like that. To me, them showing that cry on of like jealous of Maria is almost like breaking the fourth wall of like how they are able to influence how you feel about any one person, you know, because it's the show saying, hey, this person is jealous of this person. So you're just like, oh, yeah. And usually they're more subtle about it. You know, usually you don't realize that they are influencing how you're feeling about any one person via the music or the context or the little things that they're showing.

But they told us how to think about it. Now they told us how to feel. They told us to feel that they're jealous of Maria. And I'm sure there's a lot of truth to it. I'm sure it's true. It's just that this happens every other season. And most seasons, they pretend it's not jealousy. And they pretend there's some sort of justifiable reason to be mad at someone who interrupts. And then you have a villain. And then you have a villain. Yet usually in other seasons, Bachelor Nation is like, that's so disrespectful.

They already have a rose. And now we're just like, what? What's the big deal? You know? So no, I don't think she's maria's doing anything wrong uh and if you're not trying to get more time then you're not there for the right reasons it's that simple yeah it's true and yet it happens every single season where somebody does it and then everybody gets upset and it's a whole big thing and it's every single

time it's just you are here to make a connection with such little time already. Everybody is in it for them. You have to be a shark. You have to. It's amazing to me, but like how it happens every single season and yet like how the audience feels that for any given person can vary just by how it's aired or shown. vary just by how it's aired or shown i almost feel like because of what you just said how the edit is usually in the favor of the house and how whenever in the past somebody's done that you know they're vilified and like they're the villain that maybe these women came on like jess and leia and they think that they're gonna get the good edit by complaining about this but it's

completely flipped on them they all thought they all went to get the good edit by complaining about this. But it's completely flipped on them. They all went home thinking Maria is going to be the villain. Yeah. 100%. I wonder what Jess thought when she had that little. Well, they're also making it a little easier because usually sometimes when there's the aggressive person, and by aggressive, I mean the person who's not patiently sitting on the couch all night while they just be like, I got a rose, you know, go talk to that person.

It's not, it's a house divided a little bit in this particular house. Sometimes it's not a house divided. Sometimes it's just like, everyone's just against one person, but that doesn't mean that they're right, you know? Right, was it, I think it was Lexi who said, she said they're just jealous of Maria.

So Lexi's kind of standing up for and outspoken but that's the thing just because lexi was able to was willing to say that and stand up for maria gave the show some something to work with in terms of the edit right and lexi's so likable that so fascinating but i'm i'm a little jealous i would have have loved to be jealous of Nick. Cry on. But I do think Kelsey, if she doesn't win, if I'm wrong, top two, Daisy, Kelsey. And you think whoever loses will be the next Bachelorette? The next Bachelorette.

I mean, wouldn't Kelsey be an excellent Bachelorette? Yeah, she'd be really fun. I also loved Joey's reaction to her story about her mom, how he was like, everything that you've described about your mom is how I see you. And she'd be so proud. And it's just clear to me that he's really listening. I was really taught. Maybe it's because I'm a new father and just any conversations around parent-child makes me weep. Pulling at your heartstrings. Pulled at my heartstrings. But I really loved how she delivered it. It didn't feel forced. It felt very genuine. It felt like a conversation she would want to have with someone that she was having strong

feelings for. I think they have not been showing us as much of Joey and Kelsey as, you know, I think they've been kind of holding back. Same with Daisy, you know, and when he's sitting down with Daisy, Joey is almost kind of foreshadowing, you know, so clearly there's a connection there, you know. I do think Kelsey has the most chemistry with him because on the 101 she seemed nervous versus like i think the other woman like have a scripted approach to it versus she actually has a stake like she has a genuine like liking of him yeah yeah we were talking about this earlier just how the women kind of prepare to tell their story

and how much you know just some of them seem more scripted than others. It felt like Kelsey told a story because she's thinking, this is a man I'm falling for and I'm shocked and I want to have this conversation because I'd have this conversation with any man that I'm falling in love with. And some of the other women who are telling their stories are telling the story because I'm on The Bachelor and this is how I get more screen time and air time. Yeah. I could be wrong, but that's just how it felt. Or they feel I have to share this

or I'm going to get sent home. When someone's sharing their sad story on a group date, kiss to death. You know you're on the way out. Kelsey T, another Kelsey. Again, I do think she's a potential front runner. There's something about when they flash actor on the screen. It does make you a little suspect.

I'm surprised that they cast people who are either producers or actors or anyone in the entertainment industry. I mean, it's an opportunity to immediately... It's low-hanging fruit for a potential villain. She's not really getting into any drama. mean she's she emoted this episode yeah she had a hard time when you know she seems you know she's developing feelings and on the fence whether how much i still i she's a potential top four and but also like rachel rachel came out of nowhere but they had a really nice one-on-one and it seems like there's a strong connection there. So we shall see. Anyway.

And then Autumn does get sent home. Autumn seems really sweet too. She seems really sweet. They just had nothing. Yeah. She kind of like bled into the background. Yeah. This is, you know, week five, we're getting into the week where it's just like lovely

people are getting sent home because either they're just not in joey's top four and they're just not willing to participate in drama autumn needed a big emotional story yeah she didn't have did she not did she not autumn didn't have a well you know well let's give it up for autumn for feeling like she didn't have to like you know she was herself tell some story you know it's like uh it was her downfall but yeah she didn't yeah i mean i don't think that was a downfall no yeah i don't think so i think they just had nothing between them i do yeah they're like friends i think that if she had come out of left field with a big story he would have kept her for another week i don't know i don't i don't think the lead gives a fuck about any of these stories. Really? No. You don't think it makes it harder to send people home if they've just shared something?

No, that usually happens. It will often happen. Because usually going into a cocktail party, the lead isn't torn. They have a decision. They usually have their decisions made. Things can happen. Stuff can change. And again,

not a coincidence that oftentimes the lead is then forced to listen to all the people he knows he's already going to send home, you know, get their story out. Does it make it slightly more awkward? I guess, you know, but no, I honestly,

you're, the lead is so numb to hearing these stories you're you're you're kind of faking it you know and it's only with the women that you're really connecting with like you know kelsey and uh that he's obviously invested in that story because he cares he cares about her you know and not all of these stories are as genuine as they want to come across because again it's such a trope of the show. It's like anything, you know, a doctor, you know, how do doctors do what they do? You know, especially when they deliver bad news, they get numb to it. You know, you deal with it every day, you know, you get numb to these

situations. So as the lead, you know, you're just like, okay, here we go. All right. How is your heart broken? What's your trauma? And so you really save that consideration, that genuine consideration for the people you really care about. All right. Well, that about does it for a little reality recap for you on going deeper. Well, it's time to get to JWoww. I hope you guys enjoyed this episode as much as we enjoyed doing it. Don't forget to send those questions at asknickatthevalfiles.com for all things texting, office hours, mediation, and Ask Nick. We'll be back Monday with Ask Nick and then Tuesday's Reality Recap. And then again next week, the one and only Natalie Joy returns to The Vile Files to talk about the delivery, our birth story, everything about being parents, all the nooks and crannies of...

Everything we've been dying to know. So we will share all that with you. I'm sure it will be heartfelt and emotional. I mean, literally I was watching river doing the photo shoot and I just like start crying. It's unbelievable. I'm excited for this one.

Bring your tissues, bring your tissues. Uh, all right, it's time for J. Well, Zola, you got to check out Zola Dwayne,

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Hello. Welcome. Thank you for having me. Thanks for coming. Yeah, you're popping my official podcast cherry. I love that. But you've done so that, you know, because you know how fans can be. Yes.

I've done like the rounds with Jersey Shore for like five, ten minutes. You step in. You give the shout out to the show, which we're now airing already again, like season 742. And then we move on. But I've never done like a full blown, like hour interview of just me. I'm honored.

We're honored. I'm honored. The show is honored. You blew, I mean, you've always been big, but you blew up since we did our like little thing. Fat Fit Fun. Fat Fit Fun years ago. I'm so proud.

I'm like a mom watching and then watching you fall in love and now engaged with a baby on the way, like so proud. Well, thank you. It was really fun getting to know you when we did that whole Fat Fit. I, when I met you, was a little intimidated. No, do you know I have complete stage fright and I was so terrified.

I'm pretty sure I developed a stutter on that. And even when I saw you at Variety the other month, I have a really big stage fright thing. So anytime I go live, anytime there's an audience, I am panicking for absolutely no reason. Why is that, do you think? I wish I could tell you. I think it might just be I grew up in a small town uh i wasn't popular i wasn't the one that was like in theater doing

anything to like stand out i always kind of like blended in the background and this is just my theory i actually have no idea i never went to like therapy over it i appreciate my problems uh makes great reality tv but um ever since a kid know, I have this one memory of like when I was eight years old and I had to make a costume and stand in the auditorium and my dad made butterfly wings, but they were out of cardboard and they were so heavy that they broke during the performance. And that's the only stage I like performance i recall and ever since then i like have not gone on one so when jersey short came out we got like thrown into it i shake

uncontrollably shake to the point where like my best friend nicole will like hit me being like dude your knees are about to buckle like calm down oh my god yeah even now i'll probably relax in like five to ten minutes but you're a little nervous yeah you mentioned before we started that you're an extreme introvert super introvert just for example like somebody needs a video to like last week and i'm not doing it until today because i have hair and makeup on and i'm put together and i'm like all right i'm doing nick's podcast and i'm here and I'm ready and I'm going to do this video. But it took like a week just to like build it up, build it up. Because I don't know if I'm not in that mental state. I can't go and like go on Instagram and go live or put out TikToks, which look extremely hard to do, even though my nine-year-old daughter

does them like on the regular, I can't turn it on like that. I think I've gotten worse over the years too. I totally empathize with that. Really? I'm more of an ambivert, so I've been told, which is... Like a switch hitter? Yeah. Okay. I can go both ways. I think as I've gotten older, I've become more and more introverted. I think I was more extroverted when I was younger and I've always had an introverted side, but I definitely, I'm more introverted in the sense that

I need to be alone to recharge. Yes. Extroverts recharge their batteries by being around people. Introverts charge by being alone. I'm alone. I have to be. Same.

Yeah. I'll go film and then i'll go dark for like a day and i don't want to talk to anyone like i just hosted a strip club friday night which was i was a nervous wreck over for on camera and the saturday i didn't speak to anybody i ordered food i went from my bed to my couch, my couch to bed, I watched all my shows, which are ancient, by the way, and that's it. I have to recharge by not speaking to anyone and just decompressing.

I'm getting the sense that being in the public eye at this point is a means to an end. Yes. I recently did my friend Jason Tardik's podcast and he asked me, he's like, you're in the press a lot. And his line of questioning was going around like, what do you do to be in the press all the time?

And I cut them off and I was like, I make no effort to ever be in the press. Like it's usually a product of like people I have on the show. And yes, the show, like we, we pop off on certain topics and that can create noise and I get it.

But like people find that sometimes hard to believe for people in the public eye where I told Jason, it's just like, listen, I understand what it is. Yes. Obviously there's a part of me that it's always liked attention. That's how I ended up on reality TV. But at the same time, at this point in my life, like being in the public eye is a cost of doing business. Yes. Would you relate? 100 percent. And I say this with the utmost respect. I am no Kardashian. If I'm out there, it's by choice and not even like I wanted to do when you asked me to come on. I was so excited from a friendship level. I love watching your guys' podcast. You're so cute. Let me do this. And it comes from just like, I really have to choose the opportunities. I get a lot of them, but I decline a lot of them because I just don't feel that I need to be in the press just to be in the press.

Yeah. I need to be in the press just to be in the press. Yeah. Or it's, I don't feel like I need to do something just because, like, I can do it. And people won't believe me. No, I know. They're going to roll their eyes at us. Yeah, they will.

And be like, yeah, whatever. I think part of it, too, is, like, I mean, I've been in the game for a while now, but fuck, compared to you. 15 years. 15 years. Yeah. 15 fucking years.

How many, like, you're just doing it for your 15 minutes comments have you seen over the years enough to say turn that 15 minutes into 15 years right yeah yeah but it's you know i think we're just so relatable that's all i can put it to because again and i i have to say this for my roommates, too. We're not attention seeking for press. Like we're not out there hustling like other reality stars and trying to like stay relevant and pushing the envelope. We're actually very protective of each other on TV, too, which, you know, kind of makes us boring in a sense. A lot of people like, oh, my God, your show's got boring. And I'm like, no, it's got protective. Like these are these are truly my family and my friends. But again, it doesn't make for great reality TV,

but for some reason we have a great fan base that love to grow with us, I guess. Well, for all the doubters of what we just talked about, let me make an argument. Okay. You and your cast ability to be on TV as long as you have been and being in the public eye is a result of the fact that you guys

don't seek it out. Because to seek it out, it's like, it takes so much effort to like, go out of your way to do or say something that gets you press and then to read that press and follow that press. That's why people burn out. That's why people kind of like, they don't protect their mental health. And you guys, again, what you guys have been willing to do from where I sit is the willingness to just be your most authentic selves, ignore the noise, whatever noise that is, whether it's fan accounts or trolls or press. That's hard. Right?

But like the fact that you have been able to do that speaks to like, it verifies that you don't seek it out. Because if you did, you probably wouldn't be sitting here today. 100%. You know? And I think what also helps with a lot of other reality TV shows that they don't have that is

we're not a revolving cast. It's us. You can't fire us and replace us. Actually, I hope. Don't fire me. But, you know, so it's like what our story is going to be is what our story is going to be is what our story is

going to be it's not like the housewives or you know other franchises like real world or things like that where they'll just be like well if you're not going to play ball we're just going to toss you to the side and find someone that will yeah but we created this like unity where it's like we're just whatever's going on in our lives and some of it's really good bad and indifferent we'll go to production like we'll talk about it but you need to protect us in the same aspect because these are very vulnerable subjects and you know it's gonna live forever on television and as you will know having children and them being able to see it one day it's you know it's kind of it's it's nerve wracking when i first started dating i took her it was our first like ever red carpet public

we'd like just gone public we went to the mtv awards and we sat together yeah and i turned and looked at nick and i was like you have no like, like, I am shitting myself. Like, I cannot believe. She was sweating. I was like, who are you? Like, she was being so weird. I'm like, calm down. I was so unwell. And y'all took a selfie with me.

And I remember I posted it and everyone was like, who? Like everyone from my hometown's like, what the fuck, Natalie? Like, what are you doing? How ridiculous was our table though? No, it was insane. Snooki got lit.

And Joey was there. Joey, who's now working for Barstool. Yeah, who's hilarious. We had to be like removed. And like, again, MTV is like total parents. Like, you really got to get your shit together and like keep it together. Nicole like blacked out, started yelling. Was it Nikki? Nikki Glaser.ed out started yelling it was a nicky the host i'm like oh my god what is happening but it was just so fun to see natalie completely

fan out to y'all i mean do you realize how iconic you are no you don't no and for the first jersey short before it became family vacation they did one hell of a job not letting us know. Like, I'll never forget. We were filming season two in Miami. We're not allowed cell phones, internet, TV, nothing, no pens, paper, anything. But we had these like really obnoxious paparazzi that would follow us and yell stuff. And one day, one was like, JWoww, sitch. And we're like, what? They're like, can you believe that President Obama just used you in a speech?

And I never, my head snapped to the cameraman. I was like, why the fuck didn't you tell me? So we were so shocked. They wouldn't tell us anything because they didn't wanna give away the illusion that we were too good to work at the places that we worked at because we truly worked there. Yeah. We got a paycheck.

And they were like, this is the format of the show. And if you guys are celebrities, you become a different show. That's true. You would change your perception of who you are. You would act different. And it would be a show about celebrities integrating with the norms yes and it and i have to give it to them like in hindsight they did a great job but going through it i was so we were all so bitter yeah i'm like obama yeah you hear that a lot from like basher people complaining a lot of the complaints to like complain about

producers well they didn't tell me this or they kept me in the dark. And listen, producers can do some shady shit. We all know. But a lot of time is this, you're not actors and they want authentic reactions and they're trying to protect the story and they're trying to protect people's authentic reactions,

which is why they do what they do. Yeah. And my Sally Ann Salcedo, the creator of Jersey Shore, came from The Bachelor. She created The Bachelorette. She created the first Bachelorette. I did not know that.

Yeah. Who I met at The Variety? Yes. Yeah, okay. And she did the wedding, the first wedding of The Bachelorette, and so on and so on. Tristan and Ryan.

And Ryan, yeah. And the rest is history. She went on and left The Bachelorette, but she was part of that formula. How did she, I mean, I don't really know the origin stories of how they found the group. And how did you get on the show?

Yeah, how did all that start? Many, many moons ago, this was probably three years before it aired, there was a casting call for VH1, Paris Hilton, my new BFF. Like, will you be my new BFF? And my gay best friend of 20 years wanted to be on this show so badly, like so badly. So I told him, come to my nightclub. We're like doing like a hosting of tryouts.

And he gets there. It's the only time he ever visited me at the club mind you so i was bitter i was like oh so you find you come for paris but not for me and um they literally looked at him they're like you tried out in every new york city club like you need to go away and i was like don't do that so they're like but if she signs up with you i will let it slide so the application ended up online. It's more, I'm horrified, mortified, everything and above. Do we have, can we?

If you Google it, it's like, I hate blondes. I want to make out with this one, that one. It was treacherous. It was so embarrassing. Like the biggest thing was like, I hate blondes. Cause I was so mad at him for like, I'm like, why do you want to be her best friend? I was like, I'm an only child. So I'm very protective. So they called me like six months later and they're like, you would be great for that show. But we also have another VH1 show. That's like a voting off Guido show that we think

you'd be great for. It's like the number one Guido. And I'm like, ah, whatever. I mean, at that time, like during the early 2000s, there were so many castings of shows that never got picked up. It was like out of sight, out of mind. And I kept doing auditions over and over again. And then one time they're like, yeah, now we need a sizzle of you because it's now MTV and it's more of a reality based show. We need to see a day in your life. So of course I like go to the club with like the gaudy boys. I do the most obnoxious things. And then they're like, all right, you need to come to a hotel in New Jersey. And I've never

really been to New Jersey before. I was total Long Island girl. And they're like, you're either going to stay in a hotel for like six days or you're going to come back in like 36 days. And we need your cell phone and everything, your keys, your wallet. And looking back at as old as I am now, I'm like, are you dumb? Like 25 years old walking. Here's all my stuff. They lock you in a hotel.

They do all your interviews. There was like 20 of us. And then they dwindled it down to eight. And then they're like printed out the map quest directions map quest ha ha put a producer in my car and said drive to this location and that is what you see in the first episode of us showing up to the house i got chills right now like no idea what the show concept was no idea idea if who's going to be in there. Didn't even know if it was a voting off show at the point.

So you didn't even know what you were filming. No. Before you even said yes to it. No. Even if I did. No. Like they would just ask all these questions. Baby, you know what MapQuest is?

Yes. I had to do that too for like a second. One minute. Because like J-Wa and I, we would go online and then we would print off instructions and then we would take it and put it in our car and be like, oh. God forbid if there was a detour.

Yeah, oh my God. Game over. Game over. You're lost. You're using the pay phone, call your parents crying. Happened so many times. Exit closed, what? But yeah, so that's it.

That is wild. We walk into this house, I was like what am i just gonna sit here like do we stay here like at what point did you realize what it was because it was so the show chaotic absolutely chaos yeah one could argue we say this a lot about a lot of television shows these days but one could argue they couldn't make that today. No, we would be canceled. Yeah, for sure. And I'll just say that openly. Yeah.

Have you guys ever had to deal with, you know, because in cancer, well, cancer culture being what it is that people like to go back and find old shit, you know, that people have put online, even though maybe times have changed or, you know,

not that it was right then, but you know, the times have changed. Have you guys had to deal with stuff like that where people have gone back and referenced old episodes or old tweets or shit like that where you guys maybe weren't as tactful as maybe you've learned to be today?

From what I know, thank goodness, no. I mean, no. And I'm trying to speak, I don't want to speak for everyone, but I feel like as bad as our show was, we weren't like vile yeah to like we were just I think we were like more internally like just beating the crap out of each other and saying the most disrespectful things to each other right and the first season

was just pure insanity but again they didn't know what they were getting themselves into as production. My producers say it the best way. They had like 5 million hours of footage. If you gave it to 10 different production companies, you would have had 10 different shows. Yeah. And like, I will say this, after the first season with all the fights and stuff,

we did get in a lot more fights. They just couldn't show them. Anything outside of the first season, they didn't show. And I'm telling you, violent fights. Not provoked by us, but fans or haters, I guess. I just got a show idea. Like the old footage.

What if they went back and just made more Jersey Shore episodes from never seen before footage? Italy would be 40 episodes minimum. When I tell you, we were there the longest. We were in Miami the longest. They had an episode cap at 8.

So whatever could fit, could fit. My production company would, honestly, it would be their wet dream to go back they should and it's yeah it's insanity and i think like the statue of limitations is up so i'll let it happen i can't tell you those some laws were broken well i guess in one aspect, we were defending ourselves. I'm telling you, bottles, glass bottles being thrown. With civilians?

With other people? Yeah. They would just love to hate us. I'll never forget, we were at Bamboo. I still feel bad to this day. And from the top, we were at the bottom. Someone took a glass beer bottle and launched it. But one of our coworkers that worked at the store store dodged into it to like not let it hit the girls.

And like split his eye open. Had to be like rushed out. Terrible things. Oh my gosh. Yeah. But how was production involved in this when it's filming? Would they just

back off and let it happen? We had security. I mean, when you're talking from up top, like there's no, you know,

there's no way to protect us at all angles. And this is a time when television where there were the unlimited options that there are today

and you were, at its peak, do you know how many viewers? Like 10 million live that's crazy insane that's what they said like nine points for cable television cable and like network television right now would just oh like yes dream of having numbers like everyone would get a bonus yeah nobody sees those numbers anymore that's incredible I don't even think like the NFL gets that.

Well, they do. Yeah. 50 million people watched the Chiefs beat the Buffalo Bills. Okay. Low key because Taylor Swift. Yeah. That's fine. Well, NFL.

Well, Taylor. Not the brochure. It was great though. Taylor. That is insane. It's Taylor. Yeah. And Jason being shirtless, I feel.

Do you like the chest hair on Jason? I love Jason. And I being shirtless, I feel. Do you like the chest hair on Jason? I love Jason. And I love his wife. I think they're just like an awesome family. And I love love. I saw a meme of a girl who like went to high school with, what is Jason's wife's name? Kylie. Kylie.

I just found out she follows me on Instagram. Oh, does she? Ooh, flex. I know. She's going to unfollow me they showed her yearbook picture and it was a girl was like i went to high school with her and now she's in a booth with taylor swift and i'm doing whatever she was doing or whatever and just like comparing her life trajectory versus uh kylie's was pretty funny that's sad oh that person we're big are you a Swifty

I am by default my daughter's a huge Swifty I went to the tour the concert how old are your kids nine and seven nine and seven

has your daughter I don't know if it's I mean I was watching Jersey Shore at ten years old so has she

mom I know mom was at work raising four kids on her own. Yes, I'd get home from school and... I get it. Didn't care.

Has she shown any sort of, like, interest in why you are so famous? Like, does she know? Well, so we still film Family Vacation, and they're a huge part of the show. Right. Because they really do follow our family lives. I mean, my daughter was born on television.

She was born on Snooki and JWoww. That's crazy. Insane. Has she seen that footage? Like, has she seen the episode? No.

I actually, so because it's so old and I don't know if it's on streaming yet, but I have the DVDs and I'm still waiting for like two seasons and I've harassed MTV.

I'm like, can I just, can I get the DVDs and I'm still waiting for like two seasons and I've harassed MTV. I'm like, can I just can I get the season? But she definitely knows she's very I would say she acknowledges who her mom is, but she's so appreciative. But also snobby. She's a little snot rag. They all are. I'm just warning you. And having a girl first just they're built different and i'm trying not to scare you what do you mean by that

for instance i have a son that's seven with autism i would have a hundred of him before another daughter if they don't put the fear of god in you, I don't know what does. Well, tell me more. What do I need? Are you saying that as a mom or a parent in general? Both. And you try and mold them to be the best version of you, right? Because they're going to be a version of you. You want the best of you.

So she's got my toughness. She's got my tough exterior. And I'll probably regret admitting this on here. But like, okay. so my daughter at like four years old swore but she used it accordingly how so i was like a little impressed she goes she said i can't even remember the swear word like i think she turned to me was like well you're a bitch or something and i was like how did you know she just or she just turned five and I'm like how do you know if five years old this were and she and that's a problem

with trying to like shelter them but not and buses buses will ruin your life don't ever use a bus for your kids schooling but back on track so I was like oh my god and I like called my dad and I'm like what did you do and he's like well you were like 15 at the time when you did this I was like, oh my God. And I called my dad and I'm like, what did you do? And he's like, well, you were like 15 at the time when you did this. I was like, what did you do? He's like, threatened Dawn's soap. So I was like, I'm gonna wash your mouth out. And she goes, okay.

And I was like, you're supposed to say no. Like you're supposed to say, I'm sorry. And she goes, okay. So I had to follow through because the golden rule with kids is you gotta follow through. You cannot make empty threats. You will learn that they will use those against you

in the court of law for the rest of your life. So I did it. You washed your mouth out. She didn't care. She looked at me and goes, that's all you got? Swear to God. True story. Is it tough being mad and impressed at the same time?

So impressed. But that is what she got from me. So what I learned is her discipline are hugs. She is so ready to like fight like I am. Like she is so externally tough that a hug will dismantle it all. And that was the day that I stopped any kind of punishment like that. And so if she's like having like problems or school or she's so mad at her brother or she's like getting to a level that is just unheard of, I'm like, well, Lonnie, let's go upstairs. We're going to take five minutes. You go to your room. I go to my room.

We're going to come back and we're going to have a conversation. And before the conversation starts, I give her a hug. And I do like the Disney rule, which is I don't let go until she lets go. That's great. Yeah. And it's helped a lot because she's she's got a temper. She's fiery. She has a lot of empathy for people, but it like comes out in like high emotion. Like she'll get so upset if like a classmate gets in trouble

and she wasn't there to defend them or yeah. And she's just like, so like, you have no idea what they did to my friend and they weren't allowed to go to the playground. And she'll get like teary eyed and really like, I want to go back to school and say something. And she does not stand for bullying.

But when she gets like that, she'll take it out on her brother so we've learned to like dismantle her through like affection like true affection like and just breaking down those barriers but i noticed like that's she's me like she's ready like she's me on the original jersey shore like and i'm like is this genetic or is this like nature versus nurture because like she's never seen that side of me she's never seen the show interesting I'm like an allowed half Italian like person but like I'm you know I'm not like swearing and cursing in front of them like they're not seeing that Jersey Shore side of me if anything they're seeing like a

sedated like keep your shit together Jenny side yeah so i'm like i always wonder is like nature versus nurture does she just have like oh i think for sure yeah this genetic trait of being like she inherited your personality for sure but it's such a great story and thank you for sharing just because like you know back in the day parenting was always like it was just this is how you do it it was like a one track yeah you know and the fact that you you know had the wisdom to my daughter is it has a different personality and there's different ways to parent different temperaments yeah and your daughter would be so much better for it finding the problem and then i found the problem and she goes mommy i watched a bad episode on my youtube which then it got removed it said the word and that's why I said it. So she even to

and now to this day, she's incredible communicator. When she calms down, she'll come downstairs and she'll be like, I'm so sorry for saying the things that I did. Here's why I said them. And then five minutes later, she punches her brother. But then like, you know, and then the cycle begins again. I remember I don't know how old I was, but I remember my mom, I was in trouble and my mom spanked me and I turned around and I said, that didn't hurt. Yeah. I didn't spank because I knew what it was like to be spanked.

So I was like, I need to try something else and like wash your mouth out. My friend was like, hot sauce. I was like, I can't do it. Like I was panicking in the kitchen but I was like, you can't say that. The wash your mouth out makes the most sense because it's like you have a dirty mouth. You can't say words like that. It's dirty.

And we have to clean it if you're going to have a dirty mouth. That makes sense, I feel like, logically for a kid. The hot sauce just feels kind of like torture. Oh, I said that to her the other day as a joke. And she goes, well, mom, I love hot stuff. I'm like, can we not? Can you pretend that you will take... Because we joke about spanking and stuff.

I'm like, don't make me spank you for the first time. You're about to be 10. She goes, mom, you'd have to take me out with a pan. I'm like, can you pretend? She loves a challenge, clearly. Challenge accepted every time. A punishment for her is a challenge to endure. And my son, total opposite.

If I even raise my voice, I'm so sorry. Cute as can be, sweet as pie, total opposite. If I even spanked his hiney once, it would be like the world ended. When did you find out your son was autistic and how did it happen? So that was challenging. I want to say he was about 18 months old. So I had obviously Milani who was older,

so I knew like milestones that needed to be hit. But around 15 to 18 months, I really noticed like he wouldn't acknowledge his name. Wouldn't acknowledge. And then I started realizing he actually wouldn't acknowledge anything. He would acknowledge pitch. So if I'd be like Grayson, Grayson, and then I would yell Grayson, he would turn. And then I was like, is he deaf? So there was no autism on the table. And I actually thought at that point he's deaf and he just hears high pitched screaming. Like I would have to yell and he would just kind of turn lightly. So we set up like multiple appointments, one being with ENT, ear, nose, throat.

And we had his hearing tested around that time and it came back perfect. And that was the day that I went into my car and started crying because I knew then that it was something different because I was hearing, I don't know if you guys heard, but like kids get a lot of tubes in their ears or they have hearing problems. So I had three friends that just had kids that went through like tube surgery where they had to like put the tubes in because a lot of ear infections. And he had like five up until that point, which is a lot. And I'm like, it's not it's not hearing. And at that point, I was like, this is going to be something that I don't think I'm prepared for. So I went to in the state of New Jersey.

They have like an early developmental program with no diagnosing. They come into your home and they just see what you're like behind on as a kid. And well, they're like, he scored perfectly for our services. So I'm like, oh, great. So I was like, let me get him through these services before I, and I canceled his pediatrician appointments. And I, cause you have 18 and you have 24 month pediatrician appointments but i was like i'm canceling them and i'm going to do these services because during those you actually go through basically like a developmental test to see if they're hitting all their developmental you know cues right but i knew he was good markers he was going to fail it and i knew if he was going

to fail it something else was going to come so i canceled going to fail it. And I knew if he was going to fail it, something else was going to come. So I canceled everything. I was like, let me get him six months of this like in-home therapy that the state provides you. And then we'll do it. And then I even waited, I think, till like two years and like four months. I was like, finally, we're going to take on this pediatrician. Failed miserably. take on this pediatrician. Failed miserably. Failed so miserably that they wrote me a script for the nearest specialized hospital and were like, you really need to consider getting your

son diagnosed. And when I tell you, I said, I already cried once. I'm never crying again over this. I said, I got to put my big boy pants on. I was like, okay. His father didn't take it in that way. It was really hard on him. Because I think like from a father's perspective, like your son is supposed to be, you know, your son. And you don't know which avenue you're going to be

because it's a spectrum for a reason. And at that point, Grayson was nonverbal. He did not listen to anything that we said. He was, you know, doing his classic twinkle toes and flapping his arms. So anyways, I went to the specialized hospital and they, I can tell you right now, they did not want to diagnose JWoww's kid. Like they just, they were like, holy shit. They brought in like five of the top doctors. Cause like a lot of times, like with the therapist, they'll just bring in like, you know, PT,

but like, you're not a doctor. Like they brought five doctors across the board and they put them through like so many tests. And he ended up being mild to moderate with autism. And when I tell you this all happened like rapid fire and it probably didn't, but in my head it did. Cause I felt like I was in like a fever dream. Like I felt like, like nothing was real. And still at that point, they were like, this is, and this is what I would love to talk about, because this is the problem with things like autism that you think, OK, now there's an end to a means and now I can get help. I got the diagnosis. I was told

getting the diagnosis will help get him therapies. Then I find out my insurance doesn't cover any of his therapies and autism is considered congenital like Down syndrome. And there's a whole congenital carve out. What does congenital mean? It's present from birth. So it's been there forever. Oh, so you're born with it. Okay.

So born with it. They don't take care of anything that you're born with. So they looped them in with like Down syndrome and things that you're like cerebral palsy. So like the insurance basically was like, you don't. That's a you problem. That's a you problem. So me putting my big boy pants basically was like, you don't. That's a you problem. That's a you problem. So me putting my big boy pants on was like, well, if it's going to be a me problem, I'm

going to go all out and I'll never forget this. And I love this lady. I wish I remembered her name. And to this day, I want to thank her at the hospital. This Russian, I'm talking old Russian woman pulled me in a room and she goes, you get him 40 hours of ABA every week for the next three years and you will see a different son every week. And to me as a mom that's trying to work and be on television and do all these things, I'm like 40 hours, like this is insane. Like that's a full-time job. Literally. Literally. So I allowed myself to cry one more time. And then I was like, well, I got to figure

out how to get insurance, like get different insurance. And then I need private insurance. So I opened a business and I hired two employees because a state minimum requires two full-time employees. I was like, well, I'm just going to hire people full-time. At that time, FabFitFun was big. Facebook was big. All these things where you can make like YouTube videos. Again, I'm introverted, but I would go the extra mile for my son. So I was like, I'll make YouTube videos. I'll hire these people to video and do all these things so I can have insurance. And I bought the best plan in the state of New Jersey.

I cried to my doctor. She looks at me. She goes, I'm breaking protocol right now. I have a client that also owns an ABA therapy school that does in-home ABA. So she pulls me into a room and she goes, I'm totally breaking patient confidentiality right now. She pulls her ABA therapist and me into her office. She goes, I need you two to meet. You two are going to get along very well. And I just started crying in her office again, even though I swear I wasn't going to cry. And she goes, yeah, I'll meet with your

son next week. We'll start 40 hours next week. What is ABA therapy? So it's honestly, I don't even know how to begin to explain it because to me, the standard ABA therapy that children do isn't what I experienced. So in-home therapy, for instance, doesn't speak, doesn't listen, has no idea what his name is. By month three, I'll never forget, I made a joke to Grayson and I said, can you go give me an apple off the counter? Made a joke. He gets off his stool.

I hear him thudding in his little diaper and he grabbed an apple and he gave it to me. And I just melt. It was the first time that like there was a sign that it was happening. So they teach him everything. It was very slow in the beginning, but they taught him colors. He only knew blue and he knew a red apple for months. I'm talking six, seven months. But the moment he understood blue, he understood later yellow, which I have a little cute video of yellow. And then he understood green and then he understood red. And to me, that that's what aba therapy is to other

people their kid might be going through a different type of program so they taught him his colors they taught him his name they taught him how to sit and just sit because trying to get a kid that doesn't know the word sit to sit godspeed um to like take a pen pen or a crayon and color. And then they taught him like me, I. So it's not only like speech and vocabulary, but it's connecting the words to have meaning. And for eight hours a day, five days a week on top of OT and speech.

Yeah, his ABA therapist was like my version of god like she's she's everything to me yeah she saved i think my child's like future how old was he when he started the aba therapy two two and now he's seven yes so how is he today today he's phenomenal he has like assisted classes he has small group classes just because he works better in a smaller environment, but he's mainstream. So he sits in a room with like 22 other students, says the Pledge of Allegiance. And then he goes to his like little math and his little English with like four other kids. Originally, I was scared in the beginning of this year. He's in second grade because he like did terrible on this test. But I found out he did terrible because he just didn't want to do it. And

he clicked just a bunch of buttons, just a button. He just like kept clicking a and he just ran through it. And then I was like, what do you do? And he's like, I didn't know what it was. And like so but now he redid the test because it's quarterly and he is like top 93% of the state. Dang. State. Yeah. Yes. So like I,

Texas therapist every so often, her sister actually ended up working for me to help. And when I tell you like, they're so incredible. They're Egyptian. Like we flew to Egypt together last last year like i wanted to meet and see their culture i'm just so appreciative of like everything that they did for my son like true heroes incredible what is your hope for your son as he continues to get older because you

mentioned like your therapist saved his future and depending on i truly believe it even like because it's such a spectrum i would love for him to tell his story i signed on to a i'm a board member of culture city which is for sensory needs and sensory issues and i do it for grayson and i would love for grayson to continue that with Culture City when he's old enough. As of right now, he doesn't even know what autism is. He doesn't know that he's different. He doesn't know that he had a delay. And when he's ready to know, he'll understand that story. The best part about filming those YouTubes, even though I hated YouTube, because I'm so introverted, I'm like, oh, my God,

why am I doing this? They're terrible, too. So terrible is that he'll be able to see his growth. His videos were great, but my cooking videos were just violent, like they were just should never aired. But he'll be able to see his growth and he'll understand like what at least I did to make his life a little bit better. For me, it's now it's like shooting for the stars. Like for him, with both my children, I just want them to be happy. So whatever they decide to do in life, which I think he'll be quite fine.

I actually think my daughter's the one that's gonna be, the one that's gonna need mommy. I think whatever he does in life, he's just gonna take it and run with it. That's awesome. So, I mean, I guess moral of the story is that, you know, if a parent finds out their kid is autistic, there's hope and there's things that can be done. And a diagnosis isn't a sentence. I think a lot of people, and I know that, and I know friends in my life that refuse to get their kids evaluated

or diagnosed because of the stigma the sooner the better because from what I hear the brain stops developing at a certain time and then you can't reverse it but up until that time there are so many things that you can do especially ABA OT, to really manipulate the brain in a positive way and get them to learn. And fuck the stigma, like just straight up fuck the stigma. Like I didn't care about the stigma. I didn't care about the diagnosis. Like to me, it's like, if anything, being on the border culture city, I want to make people that have autism or that are on the spectrum, I want them to be treated better. I want, you know that have autism or that are on the spectrum, I want them to be treated better. There's a special place for them in this world. And it's a great place. Grayson's

great. And I know so many other children that are on the spectrum that are awesome. And it just sucks that there's like this stigma attached to that old school way of thinking and that old school parenting i think it's also just like understanding why your brain might work that way my niece is on the spectrum and she's extremely direct and a lot of people like her classmates or just people in the grocery store or whoever will be like oh my god your kid's rude or why would she say that to me? But she's like, she doesn't, the way she, it's like, I don't, she's not being mean. It's just like, yeah.

I was a little bit like that as a kid. Calling it like it is. Stating facts. We were at the dinner table and my, her cousin, my other niece, she was like, Lila, you have a booger in your nose. And everyone started laughing and she started, Lila started crying. And she was like, Lila, you have a booger in your nose. And everyone started laughing and she started, Lila started crying. And she was like, no, I wasn't. I just wanted her to know

that she, like, I wasn't trying to be mean. My sister got her, got the diagnosis and was like, now she can understand that this is what this is. Oh yeah. That's Grayson all day too. Do you feel like, it's almost like hearing you talk, you talk about the stigma and some of your peers being afraid. And I can't help but wonder your experience in the public eye and like how the show has affected you as a person. I'm assuming on some level has made you incredibly resilient and has made you have that kind of mentality of like new problem, whatever. Let's fucking figure it out you know and you feel like what you've gone through as you as a you know a star of jersey shore in a way helped you deal with your son's diagnosis for sure if it wasn't for jersey shore

i would never have had the monetary aspect or the way of building a brand to give him the insurance that's needed, which again is the unfortunate side of a diagnosis like that. My heart breaks for every parent out there that like, it's just stuck. Like if I was not in the position that I was in and there are like your son's diagnosed, what do I do? And you sometimes can't do anything. And I get a ton of messages from those people and that breaks my heart the resilient side a hundred percent but like a bitch would like a break like I can take it on but like I would like a break but then again my daughter's like growing pre-puberty right now so I'm like I will never get a break because you're about to enter it yes yeah yeah

so here we are yeah i'm so excited for you look at you two thriving you are happily engaged i am she's gonna listen she's gonna hate me i we're gonna butt heads she's gonna be obsessed with nick nick's gonna like crumble at anything she says maybe do you want to see a picture of our daughter yes my daughter's my best friend as much as we butt heads really you might have it okay okay i mean i hope we're best i remember at like 13 i told my mom i hated her oh it's so yeah i'm like just waiting yeah you know but again i think our parenting i don't know how your parents parented but like it's just different i feel like are you gen z gen z and millennials like we get look at those cheeks that's a beautiful look at the nose pouty lips how do you want to see a picture of me?

Our twins? Oh my God. It's like I did nothing. Here's the theory on that though. They say they come out looking just like they're dead for prehistoric reasons so that the dad knows

to claim that that's my child. But give it like six months to a year. DM me. Text me. And you'll be like she's me.

It's me. Yeah. So you have to zoom in. You can't even see her nose. Isn't it rude? Like you're carrying her for nine months and then you're dead. She's so annoying. And I want.

Every time we go to the doctor and get an ultrasound, Nick's like, hmm, she has my lips. Oh, she has my cheeks. So rude. I think she'll have my personality. I'm like, what the fuck is she going to have of me? Obviously love everything about Natalie. I love the way she looks. And like,

I would, I, you know what I really don't want? I don't want to be apologizing to my teenage daughter for her not looking like her mother and her looking like me, you know, seen some of those, you know what I'm saying? Yeah.

Stunning mom. I don't know what you would look like as a girl, but I'm assuming fine. I'm not fine, but I don't know. You know what i'm saying like passable passable yeah passable but is your daughter your twin yes yeah i'll show you the picture i didn't bring my phone i really hope so yeah because i'll be twin personality too um

i i hope yeah i did you do this when you were pregnant you obviously like constantly think about what they're gonna look like and their personality and like i gave birth to her on camera i was so nervous that she was gonna come out a little funky because baby's coming out natalie prepped me she showed me some of those tiktoks where the baby's head is like not okay wonky so i brought a whole bag of like bows and hats and outfits to redirect what she would look like and then she came out so beautiful i was like oh okay we're okay okay we don't need that back yeah but yes they yeah i packed those too so yeah don't ever take the first glance as like that's end all be all i'm glad she prepped me because I might have freaked out. I'm assuming the nurses would be like, hey, everything's normal.

This is normal. No, they don't. They're just like, it's giving you a crooked baby. Yeah, I'm glad that's a trend now because it's showing the like what I posted, you know, like what I what I shared with my newborn versus what my newborn actually looked like. And it is a lot of shocking. Things are funky as they try to make their way out of that tiny hole. Oh, totally.

I mean, that makes sense, but I did not know. Nope. And I am glad I've been informed. I feel like that's why you're my age. You'll know this one. The movie Coneheads was made. It's a great movie. I saw that in theaters.

I loved that movie. It was all based on, he has no idea what we're talking about. I know of Coneheads. Oh, okay. Justin's our sweet boy. As we refer to him. Sweet boy Justin.

Also 2001. I wasn't too far off of Coneheads, right? I thought it was like 80s, 90s. You were pretty far off. Okay, well, I know of it. Oh, wait, you were born in 2001? Yeah. Oh my God.

I think that was like an early 90s movie. Oh my God. I'm like, the movie was definitely not 2001. I'm at least in the 90s. I got my driver's license when you were birthed. That is nuts. I love playing this game with Nick. I'll be like, what were you doing in some year?

And he'll be like, oh, I was in high school or I was doing this. And I'm like, this is my facebook post and it's like here i am writing my stupid homework we like remember back in the day facebook where it was like it wasn't like a status it was it was so much different like your facebook i was myspace well same like where you could like rate your friends and if you got in a fight with someone you're like well moving them down you know. And then they just disappeared off the top. Disappeared off your top. And then you could have like a board.

Coding. Coding. I learned coding because of MySpace. And instead of being an accountant and doing my job, I was coding my MySpace page. I went to school for coding. Really? Because you were so good on MySpace. Did not translate.

But my dream back then was, and this is why I have a Disney tattoo. I had an obsession with Disney. My dad would take me every other year. He was a single father who raised me. And I had a dream that I was going to be an animator and I wanted to do computer programming. J-Well.

What? That was my dream. No way. To be an animator for Disney. I got a drawing board and everything. I'm pretty good at drawing. Same. Yeah. And that was my dream. No way. To be an animator for Disney. I got a drawing board and everything. I'm pretty good at drawing. Same. Yeah.

And that was my dream. Draw off. Draw off. Between Jimmy and Nick. Yeah, I wanted, I don't know why. I went one year and I saw Brother Bear being made. And I told my dad, I was like, I want to do that. That's what I wanted to do.

Wow. So I started with programming and went to NYIT. And then my senior year was either I could take an internship to go to Disney or go on a show called The Jersey Shore. And I chose Jersey Shore. And here I am now. Really? Animator. I heard it's not for the week. And it's not for people like you and me.

Because I know a ton of friends that went. You have a personality. I have one. We love to talk bullshit. You're in those dark rooms for 60 to 80 hours. Yeah. Non-stop. I think we found our path.

We did. Yeah. But back to your fiance. The wrestler? The wrestler. I don't know. I haven't seen any of his moves. I've been waiting

till we're on air to see how did you guys meet he is a heel so he is deep baby you know what a heel is no the bad guy the villain okay so we actually okay body i grew up with his sister but he's 10 years younger than me. So... All right. Here's your age gap. He was my best friend growing up, little brother, that I did not see like that at all. Right, right, right. And then...

So you knew him as a... No, thank God. Different moms. But I knew of him. I knew dad had like a... Because of all the weird conversations that now they joke around about what I was doing and what she was doing, it'd have been even weirder for you to like so much worse be in the same room

so one year i my first time taking my daughter to disney i knew that he was down in orlando for because he wants to be at the wwe and i literally call my best friend. I'm like, I'm so bored. My friends aren't flying in until like the day after I was like, it's my birthday. I don't want to celebrate my birthday alone. I was like, will your brother come to dinner with me in Epcot? Cause like, I'm just, you know, and I knew someone at the WWE at the time. So I was like, I'll invite her. I'll invite him. Like, I feel like I'm like doing like PR and like you know she happened to cancel last minute because their headquarters is in Orlando and he came which I had no idea he had to buy like a full ticket it's like $250 just to walk in

just and they're literally like you know it's closing in 10 minutes right he's like I have to go to dinner at like the Japanese part of Epcot I'll never forget it because we made a like a name we had like salmon hibachi together with my daughter and we were just shooting the shit and there was nothing like that then but I was like it's really good to see like you're grown moved on your own in Orlando and then the next month I had to go down there for a sensory opening for like a sensory room opening. And they were doing this big thing on how to like,

cause that's what I advocate for. It's like how to make everything sensory inclusive for children like your cousin and my son. Yeah, we totally went on a date that time. And I was like, cool, how do we make this work?

You're in Florida and I'm in New Jersey. And we just figured it out and actually that date was the weekend after fabfitfun really yes swear to god i was texting him at fabfitfun because like i look back and i'm like so i'm like in la i know it's like corny or whatever but like i have to fly this weekend to do a sensory opening do you want to actually go on an official date oh my gosh love that and he wants to you know be a wrestler at wwe so here we are so is he still in orlando or has he he's been in jersey he's been in jersey he had the option to like renew his lease that end of year or not.

And I said, I don't think you should. So we kind of just crash coursed and then COVID hit. So it was like married at first sight, basically. Yeah. We played house. We were a COVID couple. We did the same. Yeah.

Have you guys announced your wedding date? Planned a wedding? Where are we at with that? No, we got engaged during COVID. And coming from someone that's been divorced and like failed at this once, I don't want to fail again. So I'm like, really? I don't know. I know for a fact, and I say this with all my heart, he's my one.

He's my one. This guy is so incredible for me. But when it comes to marriage and making it like a government thing, it just makes me apprehensive to set a date. I hear you. I don't know. And then I look at Goldie Hawn

and I'm like, they did it. I don't know. But like, did you set a date? Yeah. Not me trying to avoid the question. We have set a date. But my dream would be like out of the country to an Italy small. Now that I we are closing in on the wedding and, you know, budgets being increased.

You know, it's I definitely feel like I would have been fine with a little courthouse. Exactly. That too. It's just like. Lavish. Like, who was it that told us. I mean, you know, we're spending real money. It's hard, right?

I think we've been fairly practical, but. Practical and weddings don't even exist. That's what I'm saying. Yeah. And it's such a fucking. That's the other part. And the whole industry, it's what I'm saying. Yeah. And it's such a fucking. That's the other part. And the whole industry, it's like fucking car salesman city.

If you go there and you're like, I want to book a sweet 16, you'll get the same menu, the same venue, the same everything for like a 10th of the price. You say wedding and they're like, ah, yeah,

yeah. I'm sorry. Do you want to come to our wedding? You want to come to our wedding? I got goosebumps. Really? Sure. It's going to come to our wedding? You want to come to our wedding? I got goosebumps. Really? Sure. It's going to be so fun.

It's. What's two more? What's two more? No, honestly, it's going to be, it's just like, it's on my family's animal farm in Savannah, Georgia. And so it's just like a big open, you know, we're not doing like a seated dinner. It's just like a big party. And it's like doing like a seated dinner it's just like a big party and it's like I would be honored we would love for you to come it would be iconic

are you kidding so oh my god I got goosebumps that's so you can say no off the air but on the air no this is incredible guys I'll be busy I'm actually booked that day I know you didn't tell me when, but I'm booked.

I'm obsessed with farms. My dream is to have a farm one day. We just got introvert. I want to live on a farm and just be with my mom. I can tell you right now, this house, this property is your dream house. Jenny, we just got miniature cows. Stop it. Miniature.

They're like the size of a Dalmatian. Cute. So cute. Do you have goats? Yes. Oh, my God. I want a baby goat so bad. So cute. Do you have goats? Yes. Oh my God. I want a baby goat so bad. Goats, cheeps,

chickens, horses. Would they consider capybaras? The bulldog ate the chicken once. R.I.P. Chickadee.

R.I.P. It happens. I heard. That's the part of farming I don't know if I can deal with. Every time I talk to my sister, it's a new like, guess.

A wolf ate this animal a eagle picked up this it's always something circle of life you know that's true uh jenny before we get to texting office hours uh you told me something before we started that you happen to be friends with a couple of ladies who may or may not but absolutely are on the upcoming season of Real Housewives of New Jersey. Yes. Yes. Who are these? Is this breaking news? I mean, like, can we learn about these ladies? Can we stalk their Instagrams? Like what is going on? How do you know these people? I have so many questions. I know a lot of the cast. Like I know Teresa, I know Melissa, and I know Danielle. And I actually met Danielle through this girl.

And the blogs kind of picked it up, but her name is Kayla. She's one of my best friends and she's going to be on this show, I think. I don't know how they edit. You know how that goes. But is she going to be a cast member? I don't think she's there yet.

I think she's a friend. I think she's a friend. She's auditioning, maybe. So that's the difference between jersey shore and bravo and housewives housewives to me it's like so cutthroat and it's like if you didn't make an impression you're gone like if you're not toxic enough if you're not toxic enough you're not even gonna air where it's like with jersey shore it's like you get what you see because this is all we're gonna give you so it's like part of me this it's like you get what you see because this is all we're going to give you.

So it's like part of me, this is going to be my first time watching a whole season, by the way. I'm super excited for her and Danielle and Melissa and all of them. But I've never really like watched a show, like as a parent, I'm like, I can't watch every week,

but I have to see if my girlfriend ends up on this show. You'll be hooked. I have to. And there she is, Kayla. And there's Kayla. But she's all over the blog. She is. They own E! Clean Bro. They just happen to be friends with Danielle.

And we actually have producers that cross over. And even I'm trying to get the details from them. I'm like, you were on Jersey Shore first. Yeah. How dare you? They won't tell me anything. Would you ever consider being a housewife? No, I think Andy Cohen hates me.

Why? Why? I want to actually, if I could use this public forum. Do you want to say something to Andy? Yes, I want to actually publicly apologize. So something recent happened on like last podcast that that i did where i said something

negative about andy but it was just like my insecurity of like being nervous going on his watch what happens live because he'll ask crazy questions that like as an introvert sometimes you don't love i don't love and it got completely blown up and and Andy took his time and he did not have to. And he messaged me so apologetically, so nice. So I want to reciprocate that and say thank you so much. And I'm sorry that I even said that on a podcast. What did you say? I said, like, I get really nervous going on Watch What Happens Live because the first thing he asks is about your looks

and about what did you get done and this and that. I'm just like, why can't it be something more in-depth and why can't it be something like- No, it's usually click-baity questions. They're fan questions. I went on Joey's podcast and it was total vent sesh. But Andy saw that clickbait and he saw it hurt my feelings and he really took the time. And this is Andy Cohen. He's massive little frustrating and then i happened to be in new york like a week later doing some other thing and i ran into him at serious and he like came up to me i was and i

didn't need it or expect one because like i know the gig and he was like hey i'm sorry if i gave you a hard time or blah blah blah like i had no big deal i love that and i know the gig too and that's what sucks I'm like even sometimes being as resilient as I claim to be I can still be like a little insecure 25 year old walking on the show so but yeah well like I have I have basher people who come up to me you know friends man I just like I wish I could be more like you and I'm like well oh thanks what does that mean it's like I just you don't even care what people think about you it's like no I do I'm be more like you. And I'm like, well, oh, thanks. What does that mean? It's like, you don't even care what people think about you. It's like, no, I do. I'm a human fucking being.

The difference between you and I is I don't fucking look. Yeah. It's not that I don't care. It's just that I know how to like, I can see the big picture. But yeah. So yeah, that was it. But I'm really excited for this season. Well, it doesn't sound like he hates you.

It sounds like he really respects and appreciates. I think he would hate having us on his show. That's for sure. I would hate having me on his show too. We do give a hard time. You know what would be great? Housewives. I'm not catty enough.

Yeah. Yeah, you used to be. You really have to. You have to make the smallest of things the biggest of fucking deal. And I go to like zero to hundred so quickly like i'm just like i'll be quiet quiet quiet quiet and then you know something would erupt but like to me i'm not catty enough like i can't sit there and just go you know yeah but that's what makes that franchise so great that's true i love it i love the girls on it we love i'm new to it and i'm

yeah i'm into it i'm a big fan did Did you pay attention to Scandival at all? Very little. And it's so crazy to me and I'm going to get so much shit for this, but like, I'm like, who gives a fuck? I only because, and I come from Jersey shore,

Ron and Sam was insane. I've seen some shit on TV and I've seen some terrible cheating and lying and horrible things. And I'm like, this is like pretty standard. This is normal. This is normal. I get what you're saying. It's like, all right. Has anyone seen what Ron and Sam did?

Like, you know, and it's like, and I heard there were other like cheating things that happened on that show. Oh my God, no. Like, that's the truth. And I know this because I've things that happened on that show. Oh my God, no. That's the truth. And I know this because I've gone back and watched old episodes now. Yes. I'm like, why this one? But what Tom did to Ariana is just,

if nothing else, par for the course. That's what I was gonna say, par for the course. So how it blew up, I was like, holy shit. I think it was just a perfect storm. I agree. And then I think with Tom, a lot of the shit he has gotten is just how he has handled the fallout. He needed like a crisis PR and he didn't have it because he handled it so like, I don't know, corny, I guess. She handled it with grace.

She took on these like beautiful endorsements, which I was like, yeah, girl power, like, you know, own him at the end of the day. Like, but to me that the perfect storm of it all was very confusing coming from reality TV. out there into the media that makes like everything everyone go wild right and what will happen 10 times on that show and the ratings are you know it's nuts yeah and i and i know like i came off a little harsh with that but to me i was just like that like but and i kind of feel bad for that girl rachel yeah like i think she just got mowed over and also being in the public eye and you don't know all the stories and you don't know all the sides. And she just looked very... And I watched the reunions and I watched her little snippet at the end. I just felt like, man, has anyone given her a hug and being like, you're going to get through this? like you're going to get through this or, you know what I mean? Like, or you're like, like,

I definitely think she deserves a chance for, of redemption. Yeah. I don't love what she's doing now. now. So I don't know right now. I mean, she's got her,

she's basically started a podcast telling her side of the story and it's, see, that's where I want to be out of the limelight. And then it's, and it's a lot of now it's all Tom's fault. My truth. Yeah. Yeah. And it's, I want to move on all Tom's fault. My truth. Yeah. Yeah.

I want to move on but I'm trying to make some money. Yeah. That's where I like, yeah. That's where I fall at this year.

But I do think more than anything she deserves it. Well, they ran with it, Tom. They're not the only people who, like you said, I mean, it's like. It's just so weird how that was a perfect storm

and just coming from the same business. I'm just like you know and i would tell my production company they're gonna kill me for this one but i'd be like we had our scandal and you chose not to yeah you didn't lean in you didn't lean in i was like see the difference between us and bravo like you should have we could have made something out of it uh well jenny this has been so much fun. So much. We're not done yet, but it is time

to help someone else out with their relationship problems through the lens that we've all made our own mistakes. I, yeah. And we're just here to pass on.

Do as I say, not as I do. Yeah, something like that. And then when we come back from texting office hours, we got a little exclusive tea from Jenny

slash JWoww herself. Oh my. Woo! So stay tuned and then we'll herself. Oh my. So stay tuned. And then we'll wrap. Let's get to texting office hours. Helix sleep! If you're not sleeping on a Helix mattress, then what the heck are you doing? I can't

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rocket money help you save money, lower your bills, and just help you manage your money better just in general. Stop wasting money on things you don't use. Cancel unwanted subscriptions by going to rocketmoney.com slash V-I-A-L-L. That's rocketmoney.com slash V-I-A-L-L. Rocketmoney.com slash V-I-A-L-L. How's it going? Hi, my name is Maddie and I'm 29 and I have a friend that has become a little weirdly obsessed with me and now I don't know how to get out of it. Is it a guy friend? No, it is a girl. Obsessed with you how? It's hard to explain. Like romantically? Always checking in on me. Do you think? Having a comment about everything I post on social media, texting me all the time, like above a normal level that

you would text a good friend. And I kind of didn't even really think we were best friends. So. So you're a little overwhelmed by how much this friend wants to be your friend. Yeah. Okay. Like a little barraged by the amount of communication and intensity of it. Do you think it's more just an obsession because you're like, so cool? Or do you feel like maybe there's romantic elements at play here? I don't think it's that she is married. She's newly married. And she's kind of had some personal things with health issues happening lately. And he has not been around. He's out of town a lot, not super present. So I think maybe it's like.

Do you think that's why she's reaching out to you for a friend? Kind of me trying to be her husband in that situation, I guess. Like she needs more support or help. Well, first, how are how did y'all become friends? Like what? Yeah. How did y'all meet? What is your origin? Yeah, we both moved to the area we're in a couple of years ago and both were just kind of looking for some good girlfriends. We didn't know a lot of people in the area. And we met at church, just pretty casual, and then got brunch a couple of times. And I thought we were pretty good friends.

And then she just did a couple of things that kind of showed me that we weren't. So she talked to me about her wedding all the time, but then didn't invite me, but then invited some other girls that I know are like kind of our same level of friendship. She also bought a house without talking to me and I'm a real estate agent full time. So that was kind of weird. So those are two things that were basically like, we're not that good of friends, which I was fine with. Fair enough. Yeah. Do you think that she's coming around maybe because she feels guilty for those things? I don't think so. We've never addressed them.

I just kind of was like, OK, I guess we're not that good of friends. So I started treating the friendship like that. But then it took this turn of her treating the friendship as if we're like one of the closest, you know, I'm the closest friend she's ever had. So when did this start? How long has she been blowing you up? Started probably about a month ago. It was very normal level of communication up until then. And then it was like, they have a screenshot, but multiple days in a row. How are you doing checking in? Do you have any like plans for the holidays? like just over and over without me even responding. And on top of that, I could not post a thing on like my Instagram story without getting some sort of response.

And like my best friends, my mom don't even respond to me that much. So it was like, can I just live my life? I had just got engaged too. So she's like pummeling me with all this while I'm like trying to enjoy this. So you sent in some texts text from her i'm assuming that you have not answered yeah they're all unanswered are you introverted because i get very overwhelmed when people text me back to back i definitely am but i do have close friends that i talk to on a regular basis. But I mean, you know, I think we all have an understanding of like we're adults. We have stuff going on. Like we'll talk when we talk. But it it feels like she's demanding more than that. Like she needs every day back and forth communication with me, which I cannot. Did you go to her birthday party?

I did not. Okay. This so a lot of these texts are from December. Is this continuing? Yeah. So I kind of was able to stave her off because of my engagement. I was just kind of like, yeah, I'm busy, whatever. But she's asked me like three times now to get together.

And I just, that's kind of where I'm at is I'm blowing her off every time. And I don't know how much longer I can do that. Do you want to be friends with her at all? Do you hold... It sounds terrible, but not really. Is that because you just don't vibe with her personality? Or are you a little annoyed about the real estate transaction? I would say it's all of those things.

I think all of my really good friends have worked with me. They support my business. And then I would say the second thing is like yeah you kind of made it weird like I think I kind of just got annoyed and like we're clearly not vibing I guess and then there were a couple of other things too throughout the relationship that kind of rubbed me the wrong way I guess like she had just gotten married to a guy that she had only dated for a couple months which is fine but then she was kind of like trying to be the authority on marriage to me

and i've been dating this guy i just got engaged to for like four years so it was like it was annoying you're just not on the same wavelength it looks like but are you scared of like just completely removing her from the friendship that's the thing it's like but are you scared of like just completely removing her from the friendship that's the thing it's like what's what's stopping you from just kind of cutting her phasing this off yeah and just kind of not responding and eventually she'll get the point and i guess it's like i that's what i've been doing and it's not working or being up front with her and just being like hey loved what we had as a friendship but right now i'm just in a different place and i'm just going to take some

time for myself. I don't have the mental capacity for this friendship that it would deserve. Yeah. I guess I feel bad doing that. Is there a good way to say that? My strategy so far has been to just keep blowing her off

and hope she gets the point but she does not get the point. Should we read the messages? And just, it's just, it's just one sided message. I don't think they're sexual in nature. Not at all. Not at all. She's just persistent.

Yeah. Yeah. And they're very much like day after day after day. Same day. Yeah. Thinking about you, anything new with you? How are you? Sorry for the late text.

11, 11 PM. No response. How are you? What are your christmas plans love and miss you no response are you around january 12th i'm having a small 90s themed 30th birthday party you and your man are invited no response and so i'm assuming you also didn't wish her happy birthday i'm you wished her happy birthday you ruined it she would say i felt like she would say, oh, what did I do? Are you mad at me? What's going on? Yes, I didn't.

After like 10 unanswered texts, I kind of was like, thanks for the congratulations and like happy birthday. Well, then she did text me like three more times asking me if I was going to go to the party and I ignored those. And then she texted me about three more times asking me to get together. So excuse me if you already mentioned this, but are you two from like a very small town? Are you afraid of like,

but it's not big. Like, are you afraid of like friends judging or the inner circle or like cross friends, you know, mutual friends, a couple mutual friends. There's a couple of mutual friends. There's a couple mutual friends. There's a couple

mutual friends. Have you spoken with the mutuals about how you're feeling about this? I'm not that close with them. Okay, so you're not close with them. We're like associates. No, so I don't really care, I guess, if she were to say anything bad about me, I guess. Well, the only thing I think this story

is requiring is follow through on you. On your part. You know, like you broke the seal so to speak it was her birthday she invited you to the birthday party you're trying to cut off communication and then you wished her a happy birthday and then you responded to the engagement and like had you not done that she might have been like this fucking chick didn't even wish me happy birthday we're clearly not friends yeah but you just kind of give off the vibe is my life's a bit of a whirlwind right now. I'm a little busy. I'm not trying to be rude.

So I will acknowledge your birthday. I will acknowledge your message. I just don't have time. And yeah, you can get mad at me for being a little like preoccupied. Breadcrumbs. But you're not saying I don't want to be your friend.

Yeah. You're right. I have been breadcrumbing her. I will admit it. Yeah. So this, this listen this is yeah unfortunately we think it's on you to to disconnect that yeah to make the true disconnect do you think it's a just a total ghosting or do you think i need to say in a nice way this isn't

working for me well how long have like what is the relationship like how many times have you hung out like i said like i thought we were actually pretty decent friends like i think you know we would talk every once in a while we would get brunch here or there i thought we were good enough friends to be invited to her wedding i will say that and then that didn't happen did that hurt yeah It seems like that annoyed the fuck out of you. Did that hurt you? Yeah. I think it did. I think then that followed by the real estate thing, which I'll say like we had a direct conversation where she was like, oh, buying a house is so hard. Like it's, you know, I can't figure this out. And I was like, well, you know, that's my whole profession, right? Like I do that full time as my job. Like

I feel like it would be like someone saying to you, Nick, I just have no idea how to start a podcast. Like while you're sitting right there, it's like, hello. So I said that to her and then she was like, oh yeah. And then just never said anything about it again. Oh, so you were like, I can do this. And she was like, oh yeah. She was inconvenienced by your offer of help.

Yes. And then she didn't even buy a house with like another realtor that's like a friend or a family member that she knows. She bought it through one of those like cheesy new build sales people. So it was like. All right. So here you go. If neither of those things would have happened. She I see.

Obviously, you got engaged. She saw it via Facebook. Would you have told see obviously you got engaged she saw it via facebook would you have told her that you got engaged that he proposed before it was posted like were y'all that close where you're like i need to personally tell her or she can see it on social media maybe before she got so like incessant with the text and the social media contact I might have, but that like turned me off so bad because it was so much in such a short period of time.

I have your answer. Now that I have all that information, ghosting total option. I think fine. You know, you've already been trying. So like, yeah,

I don't think it's the end of the world. You know me, I'm more for communication. Same. I think that's the end of the world you know me i'm more for communication same i think that's because we're old you know that's what i was like i think he's gonna tell me to be direct but i do have a piece of information that may add to the strategy i'm married at the end of the year and i'm moving across the country so it's not like this relationship would maybe last anyways she said bye girl honestly no listen like you don't have to be friends with people you don't want to be friends with it's just about the question is how you handle this right you've already been kind of i don't think it goes like this isn't even real ghosting this

is just more like i mean we're not friends it's fine and so you not responding i don't think is the end of the world it's not the most upfront form of communication but if you want to do the upfront form of communication i know exactly what you to do the upfront form of communication, I know exactly what you should say. So one of two things are going to happen. You're going to keep not responding to her or reach out to her. She'll either get the point and stop, or at some point she is going to ask you what's up. To which you reply at that point and it's like, hey, can I be honest? I'm honestly a little bit confused about our friendship. And just keep it real with her. Tell her the truth. I thought we were pretty close, but then you didn't invite me to your wedding. No problem.

You didn't seem to value me as a resource when you bought a house. Again, no problem. But that definitely made me reconsider how close we were. That's the truth. And ever since then, I've just been a little confused by how much you've been reaching out to me because I've been under the impression, quite frankly, we weren't that close. And so that's how I've been operating. And I guess I just didn't realize that we were. So I am confused by your reaching out. Just act confused.

There is no better way of communication than playing dumb. And it might also be therapeutic for you. You might get the answers for you you might get the answers that you want or need as to why she didn't hire you as to why you weren't invited maybe this is her way of feeling guilty that she is doubling down on the text because she also feels that guilt so it might be great closure on both ends by having that communication and telling why you're upset and how overwhelmed you are with these texts all of a sudden out of nowhere and why you haven't been so receptive

of them. Yeah. My guess is her activity is a result of you not responding. And while you handle it one way, she's panicking. It's like that anxious attachment. Like she's probably having anxiety over you not responding. Yeah. And then the few times you reached out and said,

happy birthday. She's like, Oh my God, she doesn't hate me. Thank God. Serotonin through the roof. And then you post on social media. She's like,

she's on her phone. I need to text her. Yeah. I mean, it's also been just weird. Like also some messages like unwarranted dumping of heavy things, I guess on me too. So like, that's an aspect that I'm like, once again, I thought we weren't that good of friends. Like, why am I the person that this is being put on? It's odd.

So, I mean, who knows, but you're both poor communicators is what I've learned. I won't deny that. I feel like everyone I ask my fiance, you're a good friend. They're like, I have no idea what to tell you. Like, so I had to ask you. I guarantee it'll be a lot easier when you do it.

Then you think all this like anticipation and worry is like just being worried for all these reasons, which I get. I know that feeling, but once you execute it, you're probably gonna be like, Oh wow. It was just that easy. And if you ever send her that message via text, because I'm assuming it'll be via text, reread that message before you send it.

Have your husband read it and say, do I sound confused or mad? Oh, I like that. Yeah. Because you want to sound confused because that is the truth. It says, I'm just confused. I didn't like I girl, honestly, like I just. You don't want to come off defensive. Yeah. You're just like, I don't, I, I'm a little confused. Cause I just thought based off of how things went down that we just weren't that close, which, and I'm not mad.

I, I just didn't realize. So I'm confused as to why we're in this spot is basically. Yeah. It's like, we're all of a sudden close again when she really needs it i guess is what it's felt like too or she's doing it from guilt you might you might be reciprocating that as negative because she's going through health issues but she actually might be doing it solely because she feels guilty for not inviting you and having you help with the house.

Yeah. And sometimes you become friends with people and they're like that, the interim with your wedding. It's just like, you know, I'm sure you're going to that. 12 hours ago, JWoww wasn't coming to our wedding.

And now we're like, you know, made of honor. I don't know. I'm trying to plan my guest list too. And it's a real part. So I get it, but it's weird when someone talks to you constantly about their wedding and all the plans and the details of it, then doesn't.

Yeah, that's weird. Yeah. But again, who knows, right? And you clearly don't. And then the friend thing, not hiring you. Again, I'm not making excuses, but like for the same person who didn't invite you to her wedding, is this like, I don't want to mix business with friendship. There could have been a little bit of that. You know, maybe she just didn't want to fuck with that, you know,

and just that's super fair. That's valid. But obviously it bothered you and your way of handling was being like, I guess we're not that close, which was also valid. So again, just act confused. And I think the truth will reveal itself. And like you said, you are moving. This is more about you practicing healthier communication than than fixing this friendship. Yeah, I think you're right. I'm definitely more of an avoider. I'm not lot of assumptions yes and so you don't really know certain she's done some things that rightfully and understandably have annoyed you and you've made a bunch of assumptions off of that yeah you're not wrong i don't think you i think your text to her if you do sound confused it won't she won't take it as like you being mean or she won't like i based on these no she'll be happy she texts her yeah she'll be happy she got a response probably

yeah and you can be like yeah i guess you know it's in downplay but i guess i just i really thought you know we weren't that close of friends just because what if she then takes that as well i think we are like i'd love to be your really close friend where do i go from there set boundaries and say hey but i'm moving yeah be like yeah it should be like obviously i think you're great you can give her some bullshit but like life's like my life's really just chaotic right now and we are moving so like maybe in the future but like right now i just don't have time this is just a friendship i can't make a priority right now yeah oh that's a good way of saying it and the moving does help a lot and planning a wedding you know like you're just like getting

over me when i move will be too hard for you yeah it's best we pull it now but yeah i do think just from your own personal standpoint i would work on making a bunch of assumptions off of people disappointing you. Yeah. And I mean, I think what you said, though, is like, I was fine with her doing those things. It just, to me, defined the friendship. I totally get where you're at. But then it was weird to me that when it switched back to what I originally thought, it just felt like it was because i was confused i was like wait i thought we weren't that close so what's going on now you know but even if we were super close friends the communication level was still too

much for me she's not a good communicator either right because she could have reached out and said hey i know we haven't been as close or whatever but like i'd love you know and maybe she it was she lacked the ability to be vulnerable. Like maybe she lost some friends. I don't know. Maybe some shit happened. I don't know who knows, but instead of just like being vulnerable to you, she just like her approach was like, I'm just going to pretend we're best friends and see what happens. And that, you know, was weird too. So yeah, I think it would have went better if she just said, Hey, I need a friend right now. too so yeah i think it would have went better if she just said hey i need a friend right now can we oh my god yeah get together you would have totally jumped on that because who says no to like

i need a friend oh girl what anyone who's like vulnerable it's like it's so much easier to step up but when someone like comes full court press oh my god tell me you must tell me everything it's so weird when people say shit like that. But in a deflecting manner. Everything that she's texting is just like deflecting the fact that she did not invite you. And you are not her real estate agent. But hey, girl. How's Christmas? Love you.

What's your plan? I miss you. What was the commission that you could have gotten? I'm so invested in my life and my upcoming marriage. But I'm just, why? You know, it's confusing. It doesn't make a lot of sense. So that's also where I'm like, I do want to just avoid it and not deal with it,

but I'm almost 30, so I gotta. I think this is good practice for you. It is, yeah. If you knew more about me and my personality too, you would know this definitely is. Oh, I can sense it, yeah yeah and i figured it out already you're about to get married you're gonna need to be you know communicative with your husband you know shit's gonna happen this won't be the last time you have miscommunications with friends family and avoiding conversations and

making a bunch of assumptions is not a recipe for lack of drama yeah so okay well i think i feel good about this all right well keep us posted good luck love a good update yeah where are you moving to i don't need your address oh no this oh hey have fun you need a lot of communication there so this is good practice yeah you're right you're right people are very direct there yeah you will know where you stand in that city yes exactly all right well thank you for the phone call hopefully this was helpful yeah it was super helpful thanks guys i appreciate it all right take care bye bye so jenny making movies holy shit you're the first person i'm telling publicly i have to give you a little bit of a backstory please because this is embarrassing again my introverted like little girl side is just

i'm screaming right now i'm ready to walk out before covid i don't even know how to begin this before covid i was born i was my dad's my best friend. My dad raised me. I heard you're single family home. Mom, yeah. Yeah. So my dad raised me, only child, single family home. And like, we have the best relationship. And I, at, oh my God, I was like 36 years old. And I'm like, dad, like, what am I going to be when I grow up? Because you know as well as I do, like, you never think that this has like a future, right?

And like, what am I going to be when I grow up damn near 40? And it's just like trying to figure it out. And we started talking about the things that I loved and Disney and all these other things that I loved as a kid. And it went back to when I was my daughter's age, my dad had a, I don't know if you know, my dad had a i don't know if you know but do you know beta tapes before vhs i don't know okay vhs or beta actually there's a great band called vhs or beta make great music so before vhs there were these tapes that were smaller which actually looked more convenient than vhs which do you even know what that is yes Yes. Okay. Which so I had a walk in attic in my bedroom and my dad left his beta player because at the time we were hip with VHS and all his old

beta movies and they were all horror movies. So growing up, I used to like connect the, you know, little HDMI or whatever it was back then into the my TV and watch all the old school horror movies. And I became obsessed and low key terrified and kept myself up at night for hours, but like obsessed with horror movies up until high school, into graduate school and into the Jersey Shore. I am I have this obsession with horror movies. So my dad's like, you know, the one thing throughout your whole life that has stayed pretty consistent is your love for movies and wanting to work in movies and make them and work at Disney, but don't make horror movies. But he goes, your love for horror movies is like insane. Why don't you try something like that? So I then talked to my lawyer because I'm afraid to

use any of my money, right? I'm very conservative. I'm trying to save it all, especially at the time. I didn't know if my kids were going to be growing up to be normal human beings. You never know the world we live in. So I'm like, I always save. So my lawyer was like, listen, I spend $60,000 a year on golfing and I see no return. But the return I see is happiness. So put a number on it. Figure out a number that you're OK seeing no return on and that brings you joy. So I put a number on it. And the February before COVID, two weeks before COVID, I went to an asylum with my friends and I scouted

a location and I said, I'm going to fuck around and make a horror movie here. And as I signed the documents to do so, two weeks later, COVID hit. And I actually used all of Jersey Shore's protocols, which are phenomenal, I would say, during COVID with their testing and their, you know, 72 hours of like not going out. And I hired five actors and I hired my production company that I worked on YouTube with. And I fucked around and made a horror movie at an asylum. Hell yeah. And it just got edited last week. It was on hold.

I held it because, again, I i'm very i don't even know if it's introverted i'm very scared of transition and i don't know if you were ever scared i wanted to talk to you about that doing the podcast of failing because you never know right so i'm that's like a part of me like i'm very scared of failing and and i will say this part of the industry is different and not kind. Like it's very hard to break into a movie side. So I made my first horror movie. It's an indie, low budget. I just completed it. And I would love to go to Paramount, that's MTV, who I have not gotten the email yet, but this is my shout out to Paramount to return MTV who I have not gotten the email yet but this is my shout out to Paramount to return my call

and pitch it to Paramount and I'm actually also currently working on my second one yes and I'm so nervous right now and I'm like squeezing my hands together because again I'm scared for change but when I tell you and my dad

called me after I wrapped it was was very, you know, like couple of weeks and he goes, so how was it? And I said, it was everything and more that I wanted because there's a difference between watching him and making them. And I could have failed and I could have did it miserably. And I'm telling you, it's low budget. It's nothing like extraordinary, but I paid it out of my own bank account. I didn't ask for anyone's help. I didn't get tax credits. I didn't do the things that people do to try. I literally just cut the checks myself. And I said, if this never sees the light of day, I'm okay with it, but I just need to know that I like it and I want to do this. And when I tell you 18 hour day turnarounds,

no sleep, I cried at the end because I didn't want it to be over. Like I was like, this was the best experience that I ever made. Also scary as hell, by the way, a real asylum. So have you, it's edited. Have you watched it? I started watching it on the way here and it's, so it's like color corrected the audio. And, and another thing, like I said, it's so hard to find, it's so hard to find it's so hard to transition because I work in the world of reality and trying to find like real movie editors and color correctors and things of that nature are so incredibly hard to like you know look for uh on that side of of this industry but I finally did and I'm so proud of my small indie project and I'm so proud that I'm

going to start pitching it and you're the first to know you should be that's amazing that's incredible I love that thanks and I don't know where it will go from here but well I think I think it really just comes down to your follow-through I mean the fact that what you did like most people don't have the guts to start what you did and you first started it. And the first thing that happened was adversity, COVID, you know, and most people in your position would have just been like, you know what? It's not in the cards. It's not meant to be, you know, people love to use it. It's not meant to be as an excuse not to follow their dreams or whatever.

But you did. And I don't think you're as afraid as failure as much as you say you are. I mean, I think, you know, getting to know you sitting here, I think we have a lot in common with our personalities. I think I won't accept failure. Yeah. Like for me, it's just more like when I started the show, I had other friends in the business and had successful podcasts. And it was more like I'm not doing this until I know exactly what I want it to be. Because I know I want it to be successful and I want to do it right.

And because when I do do it, I know I'm going to go balls to the walls and I'm going to fucking like that's how I feel you know and so the fact that you made a movie just on your own is an incredible feat because like most people don't even can't even comprehend everything that goes into it and and you have no idea and doing it and every day i'm sure there's a new problem that you're solving i was everything people make fun of me now and the second movie that i'm doing is much grander and better but i was the director the writer the producer i was the person getting the food i was the person like running notes i was from the pa to the top because there was only like seven of us on set. And yeah, but it made me appreciate every person's perspective.

Who wrote the script? Me. You wrote the script? Me. Did you direct it? Yeah. I did it all. You did it all.

She got the Dunkin'. She got coffee. I did. She got everything. She did everything. That's incredible. I did because I didn't know like i said coming from reality i knew how to make a movie the way that i knew how to make reality tv so my movie is very similar to

like a reality tv based horror film like found footage in an asylum i rigged the asylum the same way you rig a reality house i had hidden cameras everywhere i had things done asylum the same way you rig a reality house. I had things done precisely the same way I learned in reality. I had sound people from reality, cameramen from reality, and I created it the way that I knew I could create it. The second one that I'm now getting a real budget and real people is different, but this one's to me is more important because it's my baby might not be the best. It definitely isn't going to be the best, but it's something that gave me growth in, in, in such a way that I never thought I could grow. And you loved it doing. I love when I tell you I'm thriving in this. This is, this is my thing.

This is my new Disney. It's just, it's something. And this is why I said before, like I kind of like my messed up brain. Like I don't want to fix it because I love fixing it in horror movies. I take like my biggest fears and I put it into a movie. I think you will be successful.

I don't know. Maybe you'll win an Oscar. Maybe you won't. I don't know. But like the fact that you, A, you have incredible follow through, determination, and you love doing it.

It's hard. As hard as that business is, it's hard not to be successful when you have those traits. Yeah. Most people just don't have them. The passion is there. So yeah, you're the first to know.

I don't even thank all my roommates now. That's incredible. Yeah. Thank you for sharing that. Yeah. I can't wait to see it. It's also because I was nervous. Hey, Paramount. Wait the was nervous hey Paramount Paramount

yeah come on now please I mean let's even just the fact that you have this relationship with Jenny, J-Well, MTV the crossover

that's what I'm saying yeah so I want to pitch to them so well congratulations on that that's incredible but when I send the trailer you'll be the first one

I promise I'll give it to you yes I'll post for it not even that just see it. Just to see what like my little passion project brought. I can't wait to see it. What if we play it at Nick and Natalie's wedding reception as a fun little presentation? Yes. I don't want you guys to think that your wedding is a blissful time, not the time for a horror movie. For the after party.

I love stories like that. It's great. The follow through is amazing. Yeah. It will absolutely be successful. It's just a matter of your patience. Yeah. And since 2020, I've been very patient.

So, yeah, I think it's time. If there was anything that I could gain coming here that, like I said, to choose, it would be admitting my little project on the side that gave me so much joy. That's incredible. Good for you. Thanks. I'm blushing and I never blush. I feel like I'm red right now. No, we're so happy for you.

That's amazing. You're going to win an award someday. Someday, you know, maybe the vile files will have an award ceremony every year and I'll be up for one. No, you actually might win a real one. No, I don't even think that big. You never know. My biggest thing, you have to love it.

You have to love what you do. That's what I said to my children. You have to love it. And this, and don't get me wrong, I like and I love reality TV, but this is different. If I could be behind the camera for the rest of my life, I would be very happy. It takes a lot of guts to do what you did. Thank you.

Yeah. And a lot of money out of my skating account. Well, also guts. Yeah. Jenny, this has been so much fun. So much. I feel like we ran out of time an hour ago. Kind of.

Yeah. But it's always great when we have a guest and it just flies by yeah can't thank you enough for coming it's been such a joy thank you the next time I see you

we'll be at your wedding I know we'll have a little baby you can't you can't take that back by the way I'm invited no we're not

oh no yeah we'll send you an invitation yeah we don't fuck around we don't fuck around good luck on the upcoming season thank you wish you nothing but the best on that and in life I mean invitation. We don't fuck around. We don't fuck around. Good luck on the upcoming season. Thank you.

Wish you nothing but the best on that and in life. I mean, not that people don't know where to find you, but you want to plug all your socials and all that fun stuff. Oh, yeah. At JWoww. J-W-O-W-W. Where did that come from? So when I worked in the Long Island nightclub scene way back before I got hired, a guy would yell wow every time I would walk by. And then I started working for the nightclubs and creating their flyers and being bottle service and all that.

They're like, you need a nickname. And they're like, well, we call you wow. So let's do Jenny wow. And then it slowly started just becoming JWoww because everyone got lazy. It's a great nickname. It is. Shout out to Summer John for helping me. Summer John. Summer John, we love you.

We love an iconic nickname. Thank you again. It's been so much fun. Thank you too. Thank you guys for listening. Don't forget to send us those questions at asknickatthevilefiles.com for all things texting, office hours, mediation, you know the drill. Don't forget to send those questions at asknickatthevalphiles.com for all things texting, office hours,

mediation, you know the drill. Subscribe, tell your friends. If you're tuning in to Jenny slash J-Well for the first time, stick around. Listen to all our other episodes.

We have a lot of them. Until next time, we'll see you later and see you back on Monday. Bye.