The Viall Files - E903 Going Deeper with Barbie Ferreira

Episode Date: March 19, 2025

Welcome back to The Viall Files: Going Deeper with Barbie Ferreira Wait… is this podcast about us?!?! We’re extremely excited to welcome Barbie Ferreira into the studio to talk about everything from Euphoria, to her upbringing, chosen families, being a grandma’s girl, her new movie Bob Trevino Likes It, and more! You won’t want to miss.  “I’ve made therapists cry.” Check out the trailer for Barbie’s new movie here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3oKtziqR0LI Listen to Humble Brag with Cynthia Bailey and Crystal Kung Minkoff! Listen on Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/humble-brag-with-crystal-and-cynthia/id1774286896 Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@humblebragpod   Listen To Disrespectfully now! Listen on Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/disrespectfully/id1516710301 Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCCh8MqSsiGkfJcWhkan0D0w   Start your 7 Day Free Trial of Viall Files + here: https://viallfiles.supportingcast.fm/  To Order Nick’s Book Go To: http://www.viallfiles.com  Are you struggling with any sort of dating, relationship, or life dilemma? Do you want all the answers? Email [e-mail] with your question in the subject line to express interest in appearing on the show!  To advertise on this podcast please email: [e-mail] or go to: https://advertising.libsyn.com/theviallfiles   Thank You to Our Sponsors: SKIMS - Check out SKIMS best intimates including the Fits Everybody Collection and more at https://www.skims.com/viall #skimspartner Open Phone- OpenPhone is offering our listeners 20% off of your first 6 months at https://openphone.com/viall  Prolon - To help you kickstart a health plan that truly works, Prolon is offering The Viall Files listeners 15% off sitewide plus a $40 bonus gift when you subscribe to their 5-Day Nutrition Program! Just visit https://prolonlife.com/viall to claim your 15% discount and your bonus gift. Fox Entertainment -  Don’t miss the all-new season of Farmer Wants A Wife Thursday on FOX  OUAI - The OUAI to a healthy scalp starts here. Go to https://www.TheOUAI.com and use code VIALL for 15% off any product.  Timestamps: (01:49) - Intro (04:07) - New Movie (14:55) - Making Therapist Cry (24:51) - Found Families (39:20) - Modeling (42:00) - Euphoria (56:10) - Cooking (01:00:38) - Relationships (01:06:41) - What Do I Want (01:14:45) - Knitting (01:18:37) - What’s Next? (01:20:45) - Outro Episode Socials: @viallfiles @nickviall @nnataliejjoy @barbieferreira @ciaracrobinson @justinkaphillips  @leahgsilberstein @dereklanerussell

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Wait, you worked on Unpregnant with Shug. She's like a family friend, Sugar Lombard. She watches our daughter. I love her. And she has those amazing boys. No, she's Miss Rachel. Yeah. All of our friends are like, oh, does your daughter watch Miss Rachel? I'm like, we have a Miss Rachel in person.

Real life Miss Rachel. Real life Miss Rachel. Oh, I love her. I've known Shug for 10 years. I love her character in it too. And she's like, it's chilling. It's like crazy lady. I mean, it's so funny because she's so opposite of it,

but she's so cool. It's the best, I know. Aw, I'm pretty sure it was so cool. It was my first movie. Really? Really? It was in New Mexico, baby. Albuquerque. I've been to New Mexico once.

Ben, you got your Do Not Disturb on your phone. Henny. What's crazy is that people, no matter how much you tell them to silence their phone, because I did a play every night, every single show, there would be a phone going off. Every single show. Are you serious? Every single show. I also think that people, like some people are just like not really in tune with their,

I think it's a lot of like the older folks. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like no, it's been off for years. Nowadays with me, I feel like my phone just decides to go and do not disturb. Yeah. And then you just assume it's always on do not disturb. And then.

And then you don't, I love it, do not disturb. Oh, plus. DND baby. I am always like notify anyway. Notify, notify anyway. I used to do that. I used to, and my friend did that the baby. I'm always like, notify anyway. Notify? Notify anyway. I used to do that. I used to do that.

And my friend did that the other day when I was in rehearsal. I got so mad at her. And I did it so many times. I was being such a hypocrite. I was like, why would you do that? She's like, that's all you do. Does it actually notify?

Does it ding ding? I was like, ding ding. I was like, uh. I was like, excuse me. Sorry, everyone. Thought I was on Do Not Disturb. Did not note. And I was on Do Not Disturb.

How about that? But yeah, a lot of people, literally every single show was at, and then some people had like really crazy ringtones, which I didn't know was still in 2025. And it would just be like a song playing, or like the Star Wars theme. I used to wake up to a sound tone of Tommy Boy

with Chris Farley. Okay. When David Spey was knocking on the door. Oh my God. That sounds like, that was your alarm sound? That was my alarm sound. And it was like just a really weird looking back. Everything that you have as an alarm sound

becomes like a horrible. Like there's memory where you're just like, ah, you know? But like back in the day when it came out, you were like, oh my God, like, this is so cool. I know, I want to bring back ringtones actually. Now that I think about it, I'm like, why not? Ring backtones. Bring backtones. Bring backtones. I was. Now that I think about it, I'm like, why not? Ring backtones. Bring backtones.

I was a psychopath that had the default setting on my screensaver until my wife told me. What is it now? Now it's my family. Okay, cool. That's usually what it's for. Or your pets if you don't have. It was like the raindrops for so long.

I'm like, okay. I thought it was cool, yeah. You don't like to have a little aesthetic on know, I just didn't think about it. You didn't think about it. You know. That's what wives are for. Sometimes I forget to be a human. Truly, it's what wives are for.

Wives are for, they're like, you know, spice up the aesthetic of everything. Oh, like, yeah, all men kind of are a little psychopathy without a lady by their side. I agree. You know, just a little rougher on the edges. Just a little, they just need a little bit of help. Yeah, it's like, why would you do that, you know? Why would you do that? Yeah. I feel that. Barbie, how are you? Welcome around the edges. They just need a little bit of help. Yeah, it's like, why would you do that? Why would you do that?

I feel that. Barbie, how are you? Welcome to the show. I'm so good, thank you for having me. We're so excited to be with you. Absolutely love the movie. Bob Trevino likes it. It's awesome.

I mean, it was, I cried several times. Mostly like happy tears. Obviously it's an emotional film. You know, there's movies now and then that you watch that kind of really make you, especially in the times that we live in today, just like sometimes through sadness, you know, but like I think we're just living in this world

where we're just constantly focused on ourselves and what we need and in our own world. And it's easy to think about how life gets us down. And I think, you know, Bob Tribino likes it about, you know us down. And I think, you know, Bob Trevino likes it about, you know, Lily and the character who, you know, really had no one, you know? And then this bond between these characters makes you appreciate, you know, it reminds you

that you sometimes have to look up a little bit, you know, and see maybe people in need and things like that, you know? Like one thing Natalie really helped me with when we met is I could be on my phone in my own world. It just like, Natalie would always say hi to a cashier greeter or a barista and things like that. Which I've gotten better at.

But I feel like this movie, in a weird way, kind of just reminds you to connect with people. But it's just such a beautiful movie. Thank you so much, I totally agree with you. I think lots of the reactions I've been getting and reading about people's reactions has been kind of like, it's so confronting about kindness. It's like exposure therapy to kindness

was one of the comments I read, and I was like, that's so true. It's like, I feel like this movie really is so hopeful and yet so dark, but so uplifting. I just feel like people don't really make stuff like that anymore. It's usually something fancy with a camera trick and cool clothes and all that stuff. So it's just like this film really meant a lot to me. I mean, obviously for personal reasons, but I think for people who are watching it,

it's really cool to see the reactions. And I know Tracy, who's the director and writer, she's been doing her little tour around the whole country and outside of the country too for all these like kind of mini film festivals and really hearing from people. And it's just been so sweet. It's like, it's really cool to be part of something that makes people really emotional.

I feel like I don't even know, you know, the things that my friends, when my friends watch it, I didn't even know that they would have that reaction. Yeah. No, it's an emotional film, but very uplifting. And obviously peaks and valleys of some sadness, but it always has a very inspirational, I mean, it was really touching.

Yeah, and like you said, you don't see a lot of films nowadays like that. Yeah, I think it's really radical to do a movie that is like genuinely just about being nice. I'm like, I feel like we live in a world where we're very critical about ourselves, about other people, and Tracy's voice in this movie is just, I remember we even had a line

that was a small character, and it wasn't even mean or anything, but it was a slight joke, and she was like, I don't wanna make fun of anyone in this movie. She just has such a sweetheart, and a sweetheart and like her voice just like radiates through the film. And it's just like, it's such a, like, it's a warm hug and also like really like stays with you. I mean, gosh, I had to actually do it. So like two months after I was like, oh my God, how am I going to recover from this? So it's so cool that people like it. I mean, we did it for

like so little money in Kentucky, very tiny crew, very, very tiny. And everyone just tried to make it happen. And we did, which is honestly a miracle. What connected you and drew you to playing Lily Trevino? Well, when I read the script two years ago, I just felt so connected because I have like my own father issues. Like I don't have a father in my life. Yeah, I mean, it turns out- A tale is a lot. A tale is a lot. Yeah, turns out a lot of people have problems with their fathers. You know, and I kind of,

I spent a lot of my childhood just kind of ignoring it. Like it was like kind of this like elephant in the room that I had like this father that like, I just don't talk about. And he was in my life till I was like seven. And then he just like did, you know, kind of dipped and left the country. In fact.

Nice, right? Way to get out. Yeah, why not? So, you know, for me, this just like did, you know, kind of dipped and left the country in fact. Nice, right? Way to get out. Yeah, why not? So, you know, for me, this was like a, when I started doing therapy, when I was like 18, 19, I went in for other reasons and I kind of was like, well, my childhood, like who cares, you know? It's all about like what, like 18, 19,

whatever my problems were then, which is probably like, you know, dating and being in New York and being insane. And, you know, and I remember she really like, made me talk about my childhood and I just didn't really think it connected any of it. And so when I did, I was like, Oh my God, my father actually like this like emptiness in my life actually really affects me every day without me knowing it's like very subconscious. So for me, when I started talking to Tracy, we just had very similar situations happen. Obviously, like the father in the movie is a bit different than mine.

Mine wasn't even there. So at least he was there. I guess. I don't know if that's much, if it's what's better or worse, but you know, so it just felt really deep to me. Like I connected so much with it. And then my manager read it and he connected with it.

And I feel like everyone who's seen it, who has like this like family trauma of any kind, really connects. And you mean people who don't. There's been some reactions like, who would ever do this to their kid? I'm like, you clearly are blessed. Yeah, sadly too many to your point.

Sadly too many. I mean, anyone can be a parent. I mean, that's if you want. And so it's just, yeah, the script really, and I felt for Lily, because even though I have gone through things with her, things like hers, she's so different than me in a lot of ways. And it was such a cool character to play that was outside of what I usually do,

playing like goth girl, which I always love doing. But it was just like, I can't believe Tracy even saw that character from my previous work. It was like, it was, because this movie has like very little, if any, like sex sex or, you know, any of that kind of like, shocking, kind of like, you know, whatever it is, but it was just really cool. It was just cool.

Yeah, I think, to your point, a lot of times when you have like, a complex character, and obviously Lily is, there's always like this, you know, like the good angel, dark angel, kind of like, there's always like, what's behind the curtain, where Lily was like this unbelievably emotionally resilient uplifted person. All these scenes where like you would expect

like this absolute crash, you know, from her, but she just kept finding new ways to like pick herself back up, which was like really inspiring. But also like how, when you're performing and playing a character like that, there are just a lot of heavy scenes where you really had to give emotionally. How do you do stuff like that?

Was that taxing on you emotionally? As an actor, are you able to dip in and dip out of these characters? Do you have to kind of sit in it? If you're doing one of these scenes that maybe might require a few takes and things like that, what is that like and how do you perform? Because it's really a beautiful performance.

You really believe it. I'm always like, you want to hug your character. Yeah. But how do you do that? I think every character is super different. I think with Lily, and also I'm a new actor, so every time I do a project, I really learn so much about myself.

And with Bob Trovino specifically, I think when I'm doing a character, I Bob Trovino specifically, I think I just, when I'm doing a character, I, for the two months that I'm somewhere, like Kentucky or Louisiana or New Mexico, it's just, I really do unintentionally start really dropping into the character even outside of being there. Just because you're living in the place,

you're there isolated, you're really in the workflow. For this one specifically, I had to really find the boundaries of, you know, because I like to talk to everyone all the time and that's totally great when it's just a normal scene. But when you have to really go deep and kind of get into the darker parts, you have to really isolate. I read find little closets in all the locations

to just sit in. I won't spoil it, but there was one location that there was a little phone booth and it was literally tiny and I was just sitting there for 20 minutes listening to sad music because I had to do a pretty intense scene. But after I'm done with the scene, it actually leaves me.

I think a lot of people sometimes can't get out of it, but it almost feels like an adrenaline rush after because you're like, okay, this was on my mind. I really wanted to do this justice, and then I can just, you know, and then when I'm done, I'm like, okay, we did it. You know, and if I'm proud of it, what was the time, I don't even know what I did,

you know what I mean? At the point, I'm like, I hope it was fine, and you know, you trusted. You were like, I blacked out. You literally blacked out, and I was like, I just trusted the director to tell me if it was good or not, but this one was, it did hit deep, and I feel like,

it was a tough summer for me in general, and doing the movie was actually pretty therapeutic, I think, and it was like untangling a lot of the stuff inside of me, and the whole crew and cast, the things that you learn from people when you watch something like this, or you are working on something like this, it's like everyone was there with us.

It was so sweet. It was really like the sweetest experience there with us. It was so sweet. It was really like the sweetest experience of my life. It was very healing. I was about to say, I'm sure it's like, you probably didn't realize it or know that that would happen going into it, but like healing your younger self

from like what you experienced from your dad through like playing this whole character and like building this bond with this guy. It's like, I feel like that was incredibly healing for you just as like your inner child. Absolutely, and speaking of the inner child, I feel like that was incredibly healing for you just as your inner child. Absolutely, and speaking of the inner child, I feel like when I approached this role, I felt like it was like, Lily is the inner child.

There was something about her that was just so young and there's this sweet, naive, that naivete, I don't know how to say it, but it was just a very, it feels like every, because she has so much unresolved trauma, it's like the inner child is like the forefront of it. So that's why I feel like, in the scenes where things, when she balled it up so much and then she exploded, it was like the kid inside, like really was the motivating,

or the thing I kept thinking of is like, what is the little Lily thinking and where does that put her in it? And that's why some of the scenes, at the surface it might not be very emotional, but then when Lily is in it, it's stuff that she can't even process consciously. I think that was part of my whole thing in general

growing up, so I didn't know what an inner child was, and then once I started doing therapy and really caring about myself, and I think that's what Lily, that's her journey in this movie, then I really realized what that meant, how that informs everything that you do in your life. So I think this is the first chapter of her vibes.

The scene, not to give too much away, were Lily's therapist cries. Yes. I saw an interview, you mentioned that, your first therapy session... Not my first, but I've had therapists cry. You've made a therapist cry. I have.

And it was very... Awkward! Yeah, you're like... Was that in the script originally or... Yes. It happened to Tracy as well. So we have a lot, and I didn't think this was a common thing. I thought maybe this therapist was just a flu fluke or something and just like really like But it happened with Tracy and and when we talked I was like, oh my gosh, this is crazy

I guess this happens to not just me. Um, but yeah, it definitely happened pretty recently actually Wow, yeah, how did you do? How did you deal with something like that? Um, I was just like ha ha In the movie does that make you feel does that make you feel bad? Like how's your inner child feeling? Yeah, how's your inner child? It was our first session ever too. So I was like, okay, you know, therapists, you gotta date, you know, I had this great therapist

in New York who I love and she was such a wonderful person in my life and you know, when I moved to LA six years ago, I've still been, you know, dating therapists here and there. I haven't found, I mean, I have a good one that I like, but I just like, I haven't found the one that I'm like, oh, this is the person, and maybe this is the one that I have right now is the person, but it feels like dating, literally.

Well, it very much is, and I always remind people too. It's just like, not all doctors are credit equal, not all mechanics are credit equal or therapists, and because therapy has become, in the best possible way, so normalized, now there's kind of this increase of new therapists and you have to weed through. You gotta find someone who speaks your language too, who understands your life in a way.

Or also you do have to kind of check in with yourself, just like in dating where we have a format, it's called ASNIC, people call in and ask relationship questions, I'm always like, I'm not a therapist, you know, we, we have a format, it's called ask Nick, people call in and ask like relationship questions. I'm always like, I'm not a therapist, but here's what I think. And lots of times the, you know, the people who call in are in therapy. I'm like, well, what does your therapist think about this? And sometimes it's just like, well, we've been talking about this for like two years and it's just like, well, I'm not here to tell you not to like, but like,

have you made progress or like, have you, you know, like if they asked you this or that, and you know, and like sometimes you have to ask, like where have I gotten with this topic, or why haven't I explored something else? Because like, you know, it is nice to talk about your feelings, but like sometimes. You want the progress. Yeah, when you have friends, you know,

like I used to be that person when I was going through heartbreaks where I would just like, I would find that one or two person in my life, that friend, it was usually like a woman friend. Sometimes it was like a coworker who like, there was a bit of a disconnect where I felt like I could just like unload my emotions on this. And they were just like, you know, excited.

And they'd love to hear it. And they'd love to hear it, it'd be great. And then I would like exhaust them and then I would find someone else to like also, you know. But there was no- This is so funny that you guys just do this and they were like, why are we so weird? I'm like, everyone does this.

Yeah, but like there's no progress. There's no, like you just kind of start, you forget. You know, I think sometimes even with therapy, if you don't have a good therapist, you can become connected to talking about the pain that you're experiencing with, or like that becomes familiar, especially like heartbreak. You know, I always tell people just be careful that you're experiencing with, or that becomes familiar, especially heartbreak.

I always tell people just be careful because sometimes missing them and wishing you were with them is that last part of the relationship you have to let go. Because when you really think it's over, that's the scary part. So you hold on to the pain because that's the thing that you have left.

And sometimes a therapist who maybe isn't as good as they could be or you're not connecting with can keep you in that sometimes. Keep you in that. Because there's so many different kinds of therapy and I've tried a lot of different ones. And it's like some things are just, there's some kind of therapy where you just talk

and they say nothing. They just talk therapy. There's like CBT. There's so many different kinds. And it's interesting because people always just like a vague statement is just like go to therapy. It's like, well, we gotta educate people on like what kind of help they might want or what works for them.

And trust me, I've had some bad therapists, okay? And I'm like, how are you a professional? I'm scared. I'm scared, you know? So it's like, it's interesting because it's people. At the. I'm scared, you know, so it's like it's interesting because, you know, it's people at the end of the day, you know, this human error and everything. And I think, you know, with this scene, it was so funny because when I when I read it, I was like, this is no, no way this is in the script. Because this just happened to me like literally at the time.

It must have been like very recently, too. So I was just like, oh, this is the world, the universe telling me to do this movie. Cause it's like eerily like similar to your life. It's eerily close. Through therapy, like what is something that you've kind of learned about yourself for the better, you know, where, you know, we've talked about obviously the, maybe the challenges of therapy, but what's something

maybe that when you've kind of discovered the whole idea of your inner child, I mean, I learned that the first time I, you know, I started in therapy when I was in COVID and it was more like I advocate for therapy. I'm doing okay, but like, you know, sitting at home might as well. You know, I felt like generally pretty good. It wasn't like, you know, life is dark, you know? And then the first first session, it was like, how many brothers and sisters do you have? Tell me about your parents, all this and just kind of just, and I had a generally great childhood, but just understanding the premise of that, and why we do what we do,

why we maybe sit in our emotions, why we act a certain way, and then as you get older, you do like, as I get older at least, it's like that, what's that commercial, where you grow up to be your parents and things like that, where it's just like, every once in a while, I have things like that. Oh yeah, that's me, I know. Every once in a while I have this feeling where I'm like, when did I become my dad?

And then you learn about that and then you became more self-aware about your triggers and how your parents reacted to you and you're like, holy shit. What did you learn about yourself through diving into therapy? Gosh, I learned so much. I used to do therapy when I was a kid, but I was, I grew up in like a very like low income family. So it wasn't the best. It was kind of, you know, what my insurance could cover. And it was, you know, it did the job, I guess.

But when I started doing therapy as an adult, I used to just think I was crazy. I think that that's, or I'm the problem. And I think that a lot of people just assume that like, oh no, it's just me. Like I just attract this kind of like negativity in my life. And what I really started really deeply understanding is that everything, all my reactions, it is my responsibility to like fix it, but it's not my fault.

You know, and I think that that's really, I remember like the first time, like the first few sessions of this, you know, my therapist was like, there's like stages to this. You're going to get really angry at the people you grew up with, and then you're going to like, you know, like the first few sessions of this, my therapist was like, there's like stages to this. You're gonna get really angry at the people you grew up with and then you're gonna like, you know, accept it and then you're gonna forgive that, you know, or that's like kind of like what happens like you start getting angry, you're like,

why did you do this to me? And then, you know, I think through all these years, what I've realized is like, we all are doing our best, but that doesn't mean that it was good. Yeah. That does not mean it was good. And accepting both those truths at the same time. Like I was raised by my mom, my grandma,

they're incredibly great people, love them, but I can also accept that like the childhood wasn't great. I think I've gotten to a place where it's like, I'm able to look at my dad and the relationship that he's able to have with his children and be like, you know, that's the best that you can do. Like you don't have a dad bone in your body, but like that you're doing the best you can, you know?

And like, honestly, I just stopped expecting dad things from him and like, it's fine now. You know, like really. Yeah, sometimes you imagine like a parent getting off the phone, you know, and thinking, wow, I was a good parent there. And the kid on the other end of the phone being like, that was horrible.

What was that? And sometimes there's a disconnect and I've had to learn as I've gotten older the difference between, I think sometimes we're afraid to empathize with people we don't understand or we're in conflict with because we feel like empathizing with them is justifying their actions.

But sometimes you can learn how to empathize, not to justify, explain, or let them off the hook, but at least just understand where they're coming from. Just to know. It's a feeling to know that. And of course there's some people who, it is an ill intentioned malice in their heart, of course, and one can debate that,

but it's good to understand that generationally, things are just, everyone is just trying to do a little bit better than the last, and I always said that. I'm like, well, my mom grew up in Brazil and she was in a tiny town and all these things, she was, it was bad. And I grew up in New York, I lived in Jersey, I went to a high school in America.

So for me, it was kind of like, I almost didn't even think of any of the problems because I was like, well, it's much better than how my mom grew up. Right? Sure. And it's also like, I bet your mom didn't get therapy at 18, 19, 20, 20.

You know? My mom didn't either. And so now I look at the issues that we're having and it's like, if you were able to have gone back and gotten therapy and healed this, then maybe we wouldn't be having these types of issues, but it's like, you have to get down to like their level and be like, okay, you haven't unlocked like this part of you yet.

That's why like we have these issues. Absolutely, my mom started doing therapy, I think like, it must've been like 20 years ago at this point, you know? And what's funny is also, my mom had me at 21. So we grew up together. I'm the only child, she's 21. And really like, you know, really trying to make it work My mom had me at 21. So we grew up together. I'm the only child, she's 21.

And really like, you know, really trying to make it work with having a child and being like an immigrant. So I have so much empathy for her for that. And also I think like in Brazilian culture, it's always just like, you know, I've always heard of like the stories that my grandma used to like beat my mom up, you know? And like, ha ha ha, that's funny.

And like, that's totally normal. And like all these, like culturally it was just completely different. So like, trying to connect with my family, and some people, like my mom, will go to therapy and it's great, and then some other people you just kind of have to realize that they are gonna do what they want to do. There is just nothing you can do about it, and that's really the hard part is like letting go of like the control that you have with your family, and it's like, I can't help you if you don't want to be helped and I just have to watch you kind Of destroy everything, you know, it's it's it's sad, but there's something, you know I'm like 28 now and I know if I were to call my mom about something and she my mom is a funny amazing person

She's so hilarious. And if I call her if I you know, need stitches or something. She's gonna freak out Yeah, I'm not she's not the one that I need to call first. And no matter what, I'm 28, at this point, I know that if there's a problem like that, she's gonna be screaming on the other side of the phone on the plane, and I can just relax. So I know where to get calm, I know where to go. I have my friends, I have my family,

I know the strengths of everyone, and I don't expect anyone to do something that's radically different than what they are because I'm only gonna get disappointed. So I'm like, it's just not gonna happen. So much about this movie is kind of that, almost like a second storyline, almost our theme maybe is a better word for it,

is like the found family. And sadly for people who don't have a healthy relationship with their parents or relatives, obviously a lot of people in the LGBTQ community like will have to feel like maybe their family isn't it for them and what's that like for you? Do you have like a found family in LA and who are those people that you've really connected with

and made like a new community with? Absolutely, so I have a really small family because my whole family is Brazilian except for me. And so my mom and my grandma, my aunt lived here in the US. So it was only three people out of cousins and siblings. Not my family, everyone. So we always had chosen family. Every Christmas, every Thanksgiving,

it would be 60 Brazilians who can't go back home. Like every Christmas, every Thanksgiving, it would be like 60 Brazilians who they can't go back home. And so even like the last Thanksgiving, I went to my mom's house and there were literally like a hundred people there. And it's people that I grew up with who are like family, but we're not in Brazil, so we can't see our extended family. So we have like an extended family within the family,

within Brazilians in like the New York area, right? And so, and my mom was really far away and my grandma moved back to Brazil, my aunt's in Florida. So I really, you know, it's a very sparse family in the States. So for me, I mean, I have like my best friends. I have people that I really lean on. And every time I have like a family thing,

it's like my friends also come because they mean that much. And my mom also has that too, where it's like, we just value friendship a lot. And that's really important to me. And I think is not like instilled in everyone. Like people think that like they're, I think can only be like really close with like their family or their partners and they can't have this like really close

like platonic bond, you know? And so for me, it's, I always grew up with people who weren't blood like related, but we're like family. And I would call them Chia and she was, I was like aunt and uncle. And these are people that have known me my whole life too. So I think chosen family is, especially if their family's not here,

if the family is not accepted. I know tons of people who like, we celebrate holidays together because, they might come to my family's holidays and be part of that because they don't have that. So I think chosen family is really important. And I think it's not valued as much. And for me, friendship has always been number one.

What is traits or qualities that you think keep a friendship lasting? How do you think you've made these friendships last so long? Oh gosh, a lot of my friends are people I've been friends with for a long, long time. I think making fun of each other. I do that with my best friend, Ben, who happens to be in the room right there.

Hey, girl. Hey, girl. He comes everywhere with me. There you go. But I think having laughing, being there, loyalty, we all support each other to the max. We make fun of each other in a playful way. We keep it just, it's like family.

It's like having siblings. I never had a sibling, so that's why, what I assume having a sibling is like, where it's like no matter what, we're there for each other. And it's really, I think, important, especially since I'm far away from everyone and I have such a small, tiny little family. It's all crazy, great women.

It's great to have people that I've met through my life who stick around. Yeah, well that stick around part is the important part because the thing about family, I have 10 siblings. Okay, opposite of me. The opposite. And I joke, getting a dog taught me something. And that is the difference between unconditional love

and unconditional like. Ooh, okay. Where I was like, my parents, they don't unconditionally like me, you know? Like, they unconditionally love me. Like. Yeah. Like and love very different. Right? Yeah.

Like my dogs, everything I do is awesome to them. And my parents, it's just like, sometimes you're an asshole kind of thing, right? And that's the nice thing about family is that you can just know, even though there's a disconnect or maybe your guys are bumping personalities that for a lot of people, not always, because obviously sometimes like with Lily's character, it's very dark, but you just, you feel that sense

of like, I have a community, I have people. And with friendships, I think sometimes people struggle with because especially like LA is a perfect example, a lot of transplants, a lot of people trying to make friends, people will start hanging out, they'll connect, they'll have fun. But then as you guys get to know each other, you see some of the cracks in each other. People make bad decisions, people make mistakes.

And then sometimes instead of sticking around, there's more of a like, I don't want anything to do with this. The LA flakiness happens to us all. And then people really have to kind of go through those trial and error periods with friendships because like, you know, I always say like everyone calls himself loyal.

It's like one of those things where people will say, you know, no one's like, yeah, I'm not loyal. I'm a completely disloyal person. But the truth is, is like a lot of people just aren't. You know what I'm saying? A lot of people aren't like they're loyal to the degree that like as long as they, their needs are served in a relationship, they're good to go.

But when things get tough, when someone's down bad and maybe they're down bad because of their own choices and mistakes, you know, but like the friends who may stick around have a tough conversation maybe. Maybe it's like, you know, you kind of. Friendship is all about tough conversations. Right, you know, so, but like may stick around have a tough conversation maybe. Maybe it's like, hey, you know, you kind of. Start your trip is all about tough conversations. Right, you know, so, but like that stick around part is always really important.

And I, yeah, it's just like, people love to call themselves loyal and. Yeah, we gotta put them to the loyalty test. Yeah. We gotta see what's up. Push comes to shove. We gotta test them. Yeah. But I feel like I totally agree with you

because I've been living in LA for six years and almost all my friends are from, are people that I met in New York, which is also a very similar kind of vibe. Maybe instead of Hollywood, it's more fashion and art, but it's like people are there for their own interest. And I grew up in New York and Jersey and all my friends are people that I've known for so long and I rarely have people,

and I meet people that are great all the time, but having that like friendship where you can have tough conversations, you can like read your friends and just be like, you need to get it together, or I need to get it together. I'm in a horrible like place right now, and their understanding, and it's not just like putting a bandaid over it,

but like continue, it's like having a relationship. It's like almost, I mean, to me, my friendships are way deeper than the relationships I've had just because they've been longer and they've been, I guess, like the trials that it's been tested more, you know? And I just think it's incredibly important because especially now, people feel so lonely. And I mean, Lily's a great example, just like loneliness and just like

people aren't interacting as much. they're not going outside as much, they're not like connecting with people and it's, I mean, it's been happening slowly for a while now, but it just, I think a lot of people just feel really lonely and it's causing a lot of problems actually, like major issues. Yeah, 100%.

Yeah, major. People need to get outside, say hi, put them, get out of their comfort zone, interact with people. People are always like, how do I meet new people? It's like, well, you have to put your- You have to actually go outside, say hi, get out of their comfort zone, interact with people. People are always like, how do I meet new people? It's like, well, you have to put yourself out there. You have to actually go outside. Yeah, I ask myself that all the time. I'm like, I can't just be at home all day.

Like, if I wanna see the sunshine and talk to people, like, I have to actually make an effort. Go out the front door. Making an effort is hard. I mean, and I'm trying to get better at it. I think one of my New Year's resolutions this year is to make sure that I'm not missing like my friend's birthdays for no reason,

or, you know, making a concerted effort to be there for the people that I love, even if it's at like, if it's harder to do, even if I have to make it work, you know what I mean? So I just think that that's really important because I would expect, whatever I expect people to do for me, you know, I want to give back to the people I love. And it, you know, it seems to give back to the people I love.

And it seems kind of silly to be like, I should be a good friend too. But it's just like, you know, I think that I just like in checking myself and being like, okay, like sometimes I'm an actor. Like we all are like always like just thinking about ourselves. Like that's like really what you do all day.

You're like, huh, you know, it's a very crazy industry. And I don't want to take up all the space in conversations and stuff, especially when I'm frustrated, it feels like I can ruminate on something over and over again. So just being a good friend, also just being honest. If something goes wrong, I just am like,

listen, this is what is happening with me. It has nothing to do with you, or it does have something to do with you. And I hope you forgive me, but I just need a second because I'm going crazy. Yeah, and that's why that subtlety in this movie kind of shows that kind of, like that balance between, again, like the climate that we're in today, right?

Like the awareness of therapy. And again, there's that balance between understanding your childhood, understanding your trauma, understanding what happened and how that relates to you, but still being able to think outside of your needs, right? Because a lot of therapy is very reflective, right? Like a lot of today's understanding, you know, the generational trauma, yada, yada,

which I think can be great and very beneficial, but like the risk sometimes is allowing that person almost to become a little selfish and self-centered and like only focusing on what has happened to them and why they've been wronged and why they've been victimized by the people around them. And that can be both true and valid, but we have to remind ourselves

that there's a whole world going on around us. There's other people, our friends and strangers. Like that moment in the movie where Bob's talking to his wife and he's pointing out like Lily is just like, she's in the void screaming. She's screaming out the void. I love that line because it's so sad. It is sad and he talks about how she's getting

no engagement and likes and I think a lot of people in today's age would look at that and go, ew, weird, what's wrong with her? What's wrong with her? Why is she saying, like, hashtag best lunch ever? Like, that's so weird. I mean, there's moments in that movie where Lily is just kind of like giving a little crazy.

No, exactly. I'm like, stop posting so much. Why are you posting that? You know what I mean? It's like, what I think about this movie is that it's like a really great character study on someone who is just, you know, I think for me, I'm just like shrouded in like,

I'm like so Gen Z and like I have like third voice in my head about the internet, like what looks cool, what doesn't. And I really actively try to like combat that. I know a lot of people feel that way where it's like, you just feel like you're just watched and judged for everything. I mean, Lily, she's just a pure heart that like,

when you see someone be so vulnerable, it's so like affecting, especially now, I think, because we're so used to not wanting to cringe, not wanting to feel like empathy for people that like maybe we don't understand where they're coming from. And so this character was really just so interesting to me because you know she there's so many people like her who are just like hungry for any kind of friendship and really lonely. And people might make fun of her. I feel like that's, I think what really is uncomfortable about it is that people might see themselves kind of in her and also in the people that are affecting her, you know what I mean?

It's like, it feels like, you know, you kind of have to be in your head and be like, this person is clearly traumatized and wanting to have people around her. But, you know, I'm not used to seeing someone so, you know, excited and earnest and all this stuff. And it's like, it's almost like a little bit of like, it's very, I always say confront, it confronts you with it. And I totally, yeah, I totally agree with you. And it's, I think

Lily just like, for me is a very good representation of like the people that we ignore, you know, the people that don't matter quote unquote on the internet. We're like following influencers and people who are living this really fabulous life and all this stuff. And then there's this girl who's like, she's not doing a get ready with me. She's not like, she has no idea about the algorithm

or it's on Facebook. It's like not even supposed to be, it's supposed to be for like family and friends, you know? It's like, she genuinely just wants family and friends and it's so sweet. And I think it's also people just don't think that way. You know, I just think that they're ashamed of feeling like they want people and to admit that they don't have people around them.

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to claim your 15% discount and your bonus gift, prolonlife.com slash V-I-A-L-L. I mean, you started in this industry modeling, correct? I moved to New York at 15 to pursue a modeling career I mean, you started in this industry modeling, correct? I moved to New York at 15 to pursue a modeling career and I have nothing but like trauma and bad memories about that time in my life. How do you look back at that time in your life? Well, I think for me, I started modeling when I was 16 and I worked with a lot of people

that I knew. So I would like always at first. At first it was like, you know, I did editorials with my friend, Petra Collins, who's like a great artist. And we would do like pictures of me in like a bedroom, like, you know, the very, it was a very specific look. And it was always for like art magazines and stuff.

So that was always really cool. Cause it was friends and I always shot with friends. I met people, you know. And then when I started doing it professionally, I was like 18 or so, you know, I never had like a really horrible experience. Like I never, even though I modeled for American Apparel, which had like that whole big drama,

which never affected me or anything. But the thing that I think was really hard for me was that I felt like I just wasn't healed from, I was 18, freshly 18, just got out of my mom's house, all alone, being flown out to Germany to go do E-Com, and I would go every day to go do, and I just was alone with my thoughts for the first time in my life.

There was no mom, there was no grandma, there was no, I was alone, and I had to be my own adult. So I think that was really hard for me. I think I always was freaking out for no reason. I was also in the eighties, I was super irresponsible. There'd be times when I'd lose my wallet in London, I always was like freaking out for no reason. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, I was also in the 80s, I was like super irresponsible. Like there'd be times when I'd lose my wallet in like London, you know what I mean?

Then everyone has to try to help me get back home. And it was fun. It was like silly. Like I was like partying and like, so it was really fun. And being a plus size model was really cool because it felt like I was around people that understood. And there wasn't like that typical like kind of pressure of like, you know, obviously being really thin or being particularly tall or, you know,

all these like kind of like nitpicks that straight size models do. Like for me, I was like, you know, modeling for like Target and like doing just like, it was pretty fun. And I met really good people. And, you know, I think for me at the end, towards the end of my modeling career, I was like 21, I just was kind of frustrated. I was just like, I'm kind of sick

of just doing photos, because I was also doing a lot of like video stuff. I had like a little vice show on Broadway, like with Bradley. And I had like, I did like a Teen Vogue thing. I was like, I really just want, like, I feel like I, I've done enough of this. And I feel like kind of slowing down. I don't feel like fulfilled by this anymore. And I always want to be an actor. So I was like, I think it's time for me to invest in myself and try it out.

And I mean, it's, it worked, thank God. Yeah, and it is taking off. And it is, I had no other plan. So I was really like, it's either this or I don't know, cashier at the New Jersey shop, right? When euphoria really took off and things exploded, what was that like? Just kind of to go from more of a normal life, a working actor to ultra famous and lovable

and everyone just fascinated with you. Was there a moment where one day you went to bed, the next day it felt like you stepped outside? You know what's funny is it slowly started in the beginning and I remember Hunter and I were at a, we're having breakfast somewhere. This is when the trailer came out and the waitress was like,

oh my God, I saw you guys' trailer for your new HBO show. And we were like freaked out. We're like, ah, it's out. You know what's funny is that it went by so fast. It was such a whirlwind. I don't think I was even processing what was happening. And after week four of it being out, you know? You know what's funny is that it went by so fast. It was such a whirlwind. I don't think I was even processing what was happening. And after week four of it being out, I was like, okay, this is getting,

I'm actually going, people are really stopping me for on the street. And it's really, and at the time I had my short hair, I looked like my character. Sometimes if I don't look like Cat, I can get away with a lot. And I also wore my actual glasses in the show, so I had to change those, because I just literally look like Kat, like I can get away with a lot. And I also like wore my actual glasses in the show. So I had to like change those.

Cause I just literally look like I was walking around in costume. Yeah. Like, Ooh, hindsight is 20-20, not a good idea. Yeah, not a good idea. But it was, it was amazing. I think like, I just didn't, I expected it to do well because I was like, it's Zendaya.

It's like kids, like, you know, like it's like, you know, we're, we're all like, you know, doing like, it just felt like new and fresh and like, no one has ever done that. And I loved like shows like Skins, like Degrassi and like all like, you know, doing like, it just felt like new and fresh and like no one has ever done that. And I loved like shows like Skins, like Degrassi and like all these like teen shows, like whatever level, there's like the dirtier ones and like the kind of more like polished ones,

but I always loved them. So it's really, it was really fun to be part of like the generations like teen show that like really depicted this generation. And I always, I was hoping for that. I was like the whole time I was like, I want this to be like Skins. I want this to be like Skittens. I want this to be like our dirty, like salacious,

like teen drama that like every like kid wants to watch, you know, and it worked. It really was that. Exactly that, right? And it really like, and that's the thing, it's just like to your point, what's cool about shows like that or films or movies that, you know, kind of encapsulate an era, if you will,

is that they do stand the test of time. We'll go back and watch old 80s movies or 90s movies, or like I grew up when Can't Hardly Wait came out when I was in high school. And like those, especially at least for the people who grew up with them, they always hold a special place in your heart, right? And so like euphoria for a lot of people,

but especially people who connected with that era, it will live on in ways that I think other shows or films don't, and that's a pretty cool thing. It's incredible, I mean, it's a privilege to have in your career, especially like the first big, I mean I have like a couple things that I did before, but it was very like small. To have that happen really early is like,

I mean that's like what you want, you know? You can make so much stuff, like, you know, and people can like it, but like who's watching it? And Euphoria really just popped off, I mean, that's like what you want. You know, you can make so much stuff like, you know, and people can like it, but like who's watching it? And Euphoria really just popped off in a way. And I didn't expect it to be like that at all. I was like, okay, this is really cool. And it also popped off in a way that was really fun. Like it was just like, I felt like it was merging my life

with like fashion and like acting. And it was really cool. Cause I got to like put my little outfits on and like, you know, and I was really young. I got to put my little outfits on. And I was really young, so of course I was always insecure. But overall, it was really cool. And I think it just went so fast that I didn't really process it until I really had time to be like,

oh my God, that was, I didn't even, I was like, that was insane, that was so cool. You did play a very interesting and sexual, powerful character. What were your original thoughts of Kat? Oh my gosh, when I read Kat, I remember just, I read it, I had no context to it. And I was like, wait a second, this is me. I go, wait a second.

Did they just write about my life? And I was like, and I remember they had this open call that was like thousands and thousands and thousands of people. And so I had an acting agent at the time and I got the open call that was thousands and thousands and thousands of people. And so I had an acting agent at the time and I got the audition through that. But my friends were all auditioning for it too and I was like, you guys have never acted?

Like, what do you mean? So I'd be like, what are you talking about? And it made me sick how much I wanted it and thankfully it worked out. But it literally, it was months of me auditioning and just being like, please, you guys have to hear me out. And I mean, with Kat's, like, sexuality, it just felt like really real.

I mean, it's like the internet and, like, exploring sexuality through the internet's, like, obviously how people are doing it these days at first, you know? And again, it's like that loneliness thing where it's like you're trying to feel connection and doing contemporary things like this where it involves the internet is a lot of the things I do involve, a lot of the movies I've shot that aren't even out

involves the internet a lot. But it's just like contemporary things that reflect how people feel without it feeling like corny is really, I think, important. Because people like hate seeing phones in movies and shows and stuff. But I'm like, that's just the reality. Like we can't make a project about 2020

without an iPhone, you know? It's like it has to be part of it. So it's cool to find ways to make it work cinematically. The micro penis is something that will live in my head forever. Like I don't think I'll ever get that. I know, and I told them not to show me until we were shooting.

That is so smart. I was like, unless you guys are literally rolling, don't show me. Cause I want it to be like genuinely surprised. So the actor was like upstairs upstairs in a fake little set that they made in a green room, and I had a earpiece so I could just hear him breathing. He was really, he was amping up, he was great.

It went on, I was like, ah! No, oh my God. I believe that is what is in the show. Yes. It was great. That is all of our reactions. We had a lot of prosthetic penises, a lot. A lot.

Did anyone come out and say that their penis is real or was? I don't think anyone's penis. I think, I mean, if we're gonna get technical, I think if there's an erection, I think you have to have a prosthetic penis. I think if it's not that, I think you don't have to. But I asked this question so many times, I'm like. Excuse me, is that real?

And I have had no answer. I'm like, and I have had no answer. I'm like, maybe someone here can answer this for me. Is it like the union law that like, if it's erect, you have to have a prosthetic pedis or if, you know what I mean? I wanna know, I wanna know the, cause everyone did have a prosthetic pedis, I'm pretty sure.

I will say it's a very loaded question for men. It is. There's no way to answer that without either being somewhat douchey, weird, I would say it's a very loaded question for men. It is. There's no way to answer that without either being somewhat douchey weird or coming across like your project, you know. There's always like, are you hiding something or are you showing, there's just no way.

It's a trap. It's an absolute trap. It's an absolute trap. So it's just like. You just can't, you don't even mention it. You're just like, I do wonder like if you, like I don't know if the actors got to choose, you know what I mean?

That's interesting for me. I wanna know what the process is. Is it the character or is it an ego thing? I feel like I saw an interview of Jacob being like, I... You chose, oh he chose it. It was like, I went in and I was like, I select. There was a huge selection and I picked the right one. If it's your point, are they choosing it because it represents them or are they choosing it

because it's like, well, I would like to play something different today. Yeah. I know, and that's so interesting. You'll never know. We will never know. You'll never know. You had decided to leave Euphoria

and talked about how you just felt like Cat, the character, her story was told. Yeah. You don't see a lot of that from actors, obviously, regardless of the success of the show. And then sometimes as fans, we will watch shows where the whole jumping the shark idea, or sometimes for me, it's just like,

Dexter ended after season four. It's like, we just. We don't talk about the rest. But for you to decide, regardless of what is gonna happen with Euphoria, for you to decide that must have been a difficult choice and how did you make that decision and how have you felt about it since then? Yeah, I think it was very mutual,

so it wasn't just my choice. I think after having a lot of conversation and after season two, I think it just, there, so it wasn't just my choice. I think after having a lot of conversation, and after season two, I think it just, there was just nowhere to go. And I think instead of me kind of lingering around for nine months, I think it was best for both of us that we just kind of ended it there. And I think for me, of course it's hard.

I'm like, I love you, I love Kat. Kat means the world to me. And I think, for me, of course it's hard. I'm like, I love you for it. I love Kat. Kat means the world to me. I mean, I spent so many years pouring everything into her. But it's like, you don't wanna ruin a good thing. I think that that, and it's a mutual, it was a mutual decision. It was absolutely not just me.

So it was like, everyone decided that this was, there was nowhere to go. And that's hard, obviously, because I'm like, what am I gonna do? But again, with acting, things just happen all the time, and you just have to have a thick skin and just make the right decisions for you and your career. And it was hard, I was really young,

and it was tough, obviously. There was a lot of discourse about it that wasn't true, and I'm a person who just kind of lets everything kind of happen. Because- Was there anything in particular that you read that felt the most kind of offensive or egregious? There was a couple, I think most of it,

I mean people just, it's a population, so people took it out of, you know, they kind of, there wasn't, like I never walked off set, there was never anything like that, that was a whole thing, she like, you know, oh, I did all this, and I was like, I absolutely never did that, you could ask the like that. That was a whole thing. She did all this and I was like, I absolutely never did that.

You could ask the hundreds of people that were there every day. No, fan theories. Fan theories are crazy and most of the time they're not, right, but sometimes they are. Sometimes they are. Well, you know, you know. Yeah, sometimes I'm like, oh wow.

Yeah, well you give them 100 guesses sometimes. Then at one point you gotta guess right. And I think sometimes fans, I always remind myself that fan is short for fanatic. You know, not that I don't, you wanna appreciate fans, but you also, and that's why it's important for at least,

you know, Nail and I are always kinda talking or it's like, listen, like we just, we don't, it's not our business. Yeah. You know, type of thing, because like, And that's tough. You wanna have that relationship, but you wanna give them the freedom to be fans,

because part of being a fan is just like talking with your friends and having these theories, right? It's just fun to talk. Exactly, and sometimes- They don't even believe it half the time. It's fun. And like, they're not, they're not, you know, it's like that classic case of

someone writes something meaning your comments, and then you decide for whatever reason to like like it or respond, whatever reason, and they're like, oh my God, I'm just kidding, I love you, you're the best. That literally has happened to me before. That's why I stopped. I'm like, at this point, respect to everyone

who like comments back and like claps back at everything. I have never been that girl. In fact, I just let it like kind of go into its own world and then fizzle out because what am I gonna do? All I'm gonna do is just fuel, they're not gonna listen to me. They're not gonna like believe me if I say something, you know, so it's just like,

I just start people talking. They're just being fans. They're being fans and also I can't read it. That's one thing too, is a big thing. I think that's what, when Euphoria came out, I was so used to being on the internet. I was always telling everyone everything I was doing, always talking to camera.

Just always filling people in, and I think my biggest sacrifice as an actor is that I don't use the internet for fun anymore, really. I mean, obviously I scroll think I've ever sacrificed as an actor is that I don't use the internet for fun anymore, really. I mean, obviously, like, I scroll through TikTok and, you know, do that, but I don't, like, post for, like, a lot of fun most of the time, you know? I just feel like it's not the same being an actor

who's, like, in a show that's popular, also, like, it's so internet, you know? But I'll take it. I'm getting older. I'm fine. Who from the cast have you stayed closest with? Well, I've saw Hunter the other day, I saw Maude the other day, Sydney came to come see my play. So, I mean, they're all so busy.

I mean, I've been out of town for like eight months. So I'm like, we, whoever were in town, we always try to see each other. And they came to support the play, which was really sweet. It was very sweet. That is nice. Sensitive subject, Angus, Cloud's death. How obviously we saw that affect the world.

How did that affect cast and you personally? I mean... Yeah. Gosh, it's so hard for me to talk about Angus. I know. I'm sure. I'm sorry. No, it's okay.

I mean, it's tragic. I don't think I've ever been through anything like that. And I think we all were just really affected by it. And I mean, it just, you know, I haven't lost a lot of people, thank God. And so this was like just, you know, I was actually in Kentucky at the time. So I was very isolated when I heard it and it was just a great shame. Angus was the coolest guy, the craziest dude, like literally the amount of stories. I just love that I can cherish those moments, you know? I think about him a lot and I just, you know, such a unique person, like you said.

Oh, my gosh. Like his story was fascinating. It just he's he was incredible. Like he was a complete like sweetheart, like character. Like it's just yeah, it's really, really tragic. It's just he's so young and,'s just, yeah, it's really, really tragic. It's just, he's so young and, you know, yeah, it's hard. Okay, you guys, for everyone who wants to know, are you DTF? Down to farm, that is?

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I do like to cook. I love to cook. I'm the, I'm the cooker in the family. She's my, she's my, she's my chef. I like to cook if I don't like to clean. That's my problem. You know, I don't like either. I love to cook.

I'll cook if someone else cleans. Okay. If everyone cleans up all. I would, I would love that. So we, I don't like either. I love to cook. I'll cook if someone else cleans. Okay. If everyone cleans up all. I would love that. So we do a good job of separating chores. Oh, I love that. It's always my problem when I'm boot up.

Yeah, you gotta, I've learned. It's like 90% of the relationship is chores. Young me was like, love is enough and I can just power through anything. Dishwasher. You know, it's just like, you can have a completely different menu and we can have different tastes in everything.

If we love each other enough. And like being in a relationship with Natalie more than anything as Tommy, just like relationships are hard enough. Every day can't be a battle. You know, picking what you want to eat, who does what, you know? And so like, I can't, I'm allergic to laundry.

Natalie loves it. Natalie's allergic to doing that. That works out perfectly. I can do dishes, you dishes. I love to cook. I won't even let her cook sometimes. I don't let anyone cook. I'm more like, you're doing it wrong. Same.

Move, move. I grew up in a culinary family. My mom's a chef and my aunt's a chef. And I didn't really know how to cook until a few years ago. So I, as soon as that. What's your favorite, do you have like a go-to? Recently, I make a really good chicken thigh recently. I've been really doing a really good chicken thigh.

I love a thigh because most people go breast. No. And it's just like, you know, dark meat, you know. You gotta do bone in, skin on, thigh, you gotta sear it and then you take it out and then you make like a little sauce, put it in the oven. You would do a little lemon, some capers, some anchovies maybe.

Oh my God. Yeah, oh my God. It's so yummy. I also made a yummy like a mushroom gravy on something but it was good. I love to make like uh, I just like love to cook. So if I see something that I like, I make a really good salmon too. Is it easy for you to cook for like one person or are you like guys I'm cooking everyone come over? I need everyone to come. I will not cook for myself. I literally can't do it. I just cannot do it. I'd rather cook for other people and myself

than I can't make myself a thing. Maybe that's true. I mean, like when I was, you know, in my single days and there was a lot of years. I was like the single serving guy, you know? I'd go to the grocery store every day and I'd find like things that like would make sense. Like that's when I got into,

that's when I discovered the joy of an English muffin. Ooh, yeah. Because I could also like make a burger and then use it as a bun. But like, before as a single serving guy, if you just buy like a bag of buns, like you use one bun and it goes bad, but an English muffin you can put in the fridge,

it keeps a little longer. And I would have all these like single serving tricks. Yeah, like, and it was just like, but also kind of depressing that I figured out how to like, sustainably like shop for myself. Yeah, I always like, if I make something really ugly, I just put a little herb on it, like some herbs, just a little chive on the top.

So you're like, it has to like plate perfectly. I like a good plate. So do I. I always feel bad cause I like try to plate my 13 month old daughters like perfectly and she's like screaming, crying. And I'm like, just honey, if I can just get this perfectly.

And just like mashing it with her hands. I love that, that's so cute. It's a screaming, crying. I'm like, just honey, if I can just get this perfectly. And just like bashing it with her hands. I love that. That's so cute. It's a thought that counts. It is, it is. She doesn't understand yet. She doesn't understand yet, but she will. I've taken a photo of every one of her meals

and she'll be like, thanks mom. They're definitely girl winners for sure. Her hands like in all of them, like going for something in all the pictures. It's really cute. So cute. Speaking of girl, when I was in New York and I was doing a play every night,

so I would come home at like nine, I would literally just eat like pickles and like cheese and salami with crackers like for dinner every night. I literally was the girliest dinner. And like some fruit and like just eating every like pickled thing that was in the fridge. Nuts, random, yeah.

Because it's just like, I would just come home so late. I'm just like, this is like, I'm like this is, I'm like 90% sodium at the moment. I could feel myself just like full of salt. I'm just like, how much salami and cheese? Wow, I am inflamed. Yeah. Maybe girl dinner, you know,

maybe I should switch it up a little bit. But that thankfully, now I'm back in my kitchen and I can make like, you know, rounded balanced meals. But yeah. Do you have like a go-to meal? You do. Yes, I either do like a sundubuu like a Korean soup. I do that a lot I'll order I love Chinese food. I love like a good kong pao chicken. You've been to Din Tai Fung?

I love Din Tai Fung. What's your order? I like the soup dumplings I'll get the like broccoli and garlic sauce. That's yummy. Yum. Yum's and then I'll have like Rice, I usually just like really like the dumplings I'll have broccoli and garlic sauce, those yum yum yums, and then I'll have rice. I usually just really like the dumplings. The dumplings are so good. I'll just get all the different, the pan fried ones, the steamed ones, I'll take it all. The rice cakes, you ever had the rice cakes?

I love a rice cake. I was just thinking about rice cakes the other day. I was like, I need to go to H Mart and just get some rice cake. Before we started recording, we were talking about our daughter, and you mentioned, oh, I just want a baby. I want a baby!

Is that something in the future you hope? Oh, yes. Every time someone has a baby, my first reaction is like, I want one too. And I feel like I grew up as an only child. I am the baby of the family and I'm nearly 30. So I had never really interacted with a lot of kids growing up or in general.

And so I never really thought about having kids until recently. And I think also everyone in my family has had a baby before 21. So I'm already like I'm not gonna say I'm late like everyone wanted me to not continue that. It's like being from the south. Yeah like no one's like you should have a baby like no one's pressuring me to have a baby this is all me. Okay. Like okay my mom was like you should yeah but maybe you need a relationship first. So she's not like I want a grand baby. She does but she's just like just like, you need to, you know, she's like, you gotta wait for the right one, you know, and like, don't rush it. But I want a baby in like four or five years.

Cute. What love and dating relationships are we in a season of like independence? Are we dating around? We're in a single era. We're in a single era. We are in a single era. Do we love that?

We like it, we like it. I think, you know, I saw a psychic, I didn't see a psychic, A psychic was at a party. A psychic saw me. A psychic saw me. He asked for me specifically. I saw a psychic last year and he told me that I wasn't going to find love in 2024.

So I'm like, well, maybe in 2025. Okay. What did he say? Well, no, that was it. Thanks for your help. That's it. That's all you get. You got to put another quarter in. Yeah, yeah.

Just not this year. I'm like, okay, I'll take it. So I actually really lived my life by that. Even though I, it's kind you get. You gotta put another quarter in. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just not this year. I'm like, okay, I'll take it. So I actually really live my life by that, even though I, it's kinda great. I'm like, I think I'm taking a break from dating for a second. Are psychics, like they make me nervous. They make me nervous.

Like I do not wanna know when I'm gonna die. They're not gonna tell you that, but yes. Maybe they would, but yeah, there's something about psychics where it's just like, I don't, do you? I don't, I happen to have seen a psychic at a party. I have been to a psychic here and there, but I'm also wary of like the LA of it all.

Like I'm very, I understand the spirit healers and the crystals and Malibu and stuff. I get it, I get it. I think it's fun, but you know, I take it with a grain of salt. Yeah. It's not like what I, you know. Nick's sister saw one and she said that,

the psychic said, the brother closest to you is going to have twins, and that's Nick. And I was like, oh. When are the twins happening, baby? My God. My sister has twins, her sister has twins. I still don't know how twins work. Is it genetic?

I think so. I think it's GIFs generation. So it's like GIFs one generation. But I don't think how twins work. Is it genetic? I think so. I think it's GIFs generation. So it's like GIFs one generation. But I don't think it has anything to do with the guy. Right? Maybe. Will chromosomes make it? Well, I feel like y'all.

Cause it would have to, there'd be two sperms. Well, yeah, but usually there's a lot of those. Yeah, but to make it up, all the way up to the egg. Yeah. Yeah, but yet there either has to be one egg or one, I don't know. There can be two eggs.

I've never really had anyone explain this to me. That's fraternal. That's fraternal. That's a science podcast. Fraternal twins are two different eggs, correct? I might be wrong. But that's what makes, it's identical, so I guess both eggs.

Yeah, there has to be two. What's crazy is my sister has twins and they are so identical that their fingerprint DNA is the same. Those are fascinating to me. Crazy. Imagine just having a part of you in the world. And you're just the exact same.

Yeah, and they're finishing each other's sentences. That sounds so wonderful. But it also is really sad because you have this person that is so part of you that if you guys are not together, it's like, you know, I've heard like twins knowing when the other one is like hurt if they're not in the same place. It's like twins are, we need to study that.

Science get on it. Science get on it. What's in your single era, having dated before, I'm assuming. Yes, I have. What's something that you've, through previous experiences, have learned that maybe things have lacked that you really are looking for in your whenever that happens for you next?

And what's on something that, while things maybe didn't work out in the past with whoever, you still really enjoy and appreciate that aspect of the relationship that you hope to carry into your next relationship? It's a great question. I think what I learned about myself is that I'm a particular kind of girl, and I'm not for everyone.

You know what I mean? And not in a bad way, but just like, you know, my life is just very, I think a lot of people don't really like that. They don't like a woman who's very loud and takes up a lot of space and I just inherently do that because I grew up with a lot of women who do that. So even as a kid I was just like,

I never lived under the scrutiny of the patriarchy. In that phase. Yeah, where it's like, oh yeah, you have to be small. You know what I mean? You have to be quiet or anything. So I think a lot of people don't like that. I don't take it personally when they don't. And also I need someone who's gonna take care of me

because I take care of a lot of people in a lot of ways and I really need someone who's gonna really listen to me and be there for me. I am by no means like submissive wife vibes. You know what I mean? So it's like, some people, I also learned with dating is that I just don't take it personal anymore. I'm, some people, and I've also learned with dating is that, I just don't take it personal anymore.

I'm just like this, or you know, I'm just like this is not working out, it's not because of me, I used to always blame me. When did you learn that? Because that's like a huge step in like just adult life. Recently, honestly, like the past couple of years, it's just been so, and of course I get into a trap, I'm like, whoa, you know, like what happened there?

But then I'm like, wait, like did I even like that person? Like I also learned, do I want someone to like me or do I like them? You know what I mean? That's such a huge step. I mean, I'll ask people all the time. They'll call, if I have a friend who's asking or someone calls in, they'll be like, you know,

I wanna talk to you about this. I'm like, well, what do you like about how they make you feel? It's always my favorite question. Because sometimes or often there's always like this, oh, um, oh, I never thought about how they make me feel. I've just more thought about like, why haven't they texted me back?

Or why aren't they calling? Or like, why are they being flaky on me? Like, why are they treating, like why are they acting this way? And then immediately there's a thought, like I'm doing something wrong. What could I do differently? And things like that.

But like, it was funny that you just said, moments ago, where you realized that you're not for everyone. And to me, again, another huge pivotal, at least for me, was that no one is, by the way. Yeah, I was thinking, I'm hoping not, I'm the one person who could like. For everybody. I'm pure for everyone, everyone will love me.

I'm like, yeah, no. But that's the person who is people pleasing, who hasn't really realized who they are as a person and not even comfortable to be that person. You have to allow, whether it's dating, whether it's friendship, whether it's just like being an adult in society, is having the guts to be who you are

and have people not like you. It's so freeing. I always admired that, because when I was younger I would just get so caught up and like, what did I do wrong? And I'm like, probably a lot of stuff, but it just doesn't really matter. Or not wrong, you just did something and it just,

it wasn't for them, they don't vibe with you. There's so many people out there who are just like, not my cup of tea. And that's totally fine. And there are someone else who's like, wow, this is my dream person. And I also think a lot of people think that they know who I am

and they find out that that's not who I am. You know what I mean? And I do that too. I project personalities on people. I think I also had to stop doing that, where it's like, you just start making these love stories in your head, and I'm like, I'm gonna go play in my life, or I'm just tired.

I don't wanna do all that anymore. Do you find it to be easy or more difficult to date in the industry or outside of the industry? I have never really dated anyone in the industry. Just never have. Yeah, I think outside, I've dated a lot of people who are creative, but they're not actors. I definitely, that's not usually what I go outside, I've dated a lot of people who are creative, but they're not actors. I definitely, that's not usually what I go for,

but I'm open to anything, really. I'm like, I really am open to anyone who is kind and actually wants to talk to me and hang out with me and spend time with me and communicate. I dated women most of my life, so the communication has always been really big. And so it's just like, for me, it's a lot. Especially now, I'm dating a little bit more seriously.

I'm not just like, oh, this is just to be together. Now it's more like, what do I want? I want a baby in five years. I'm like, I'm getting older. This is not as fun anymore when it's just crazy. You feel like you have a a timeline over your head or? No, honestly no, but I just, I, it's more of like a way to know,

like sometimes I just don't know what I want and I'll like meet someone I'm like, okay, but this person's not really that, but then it could be this. But I'm just like, actually I do know what I want. And it just has to be like confident enough to just be like, this is, like I do want commitment. It's tough, right?

Like, you know, like me, younger me was more like, what I wanted was somebody and I wanted somebody who wanted me. And that was kind of the baseline. That made me too. For most people. Anyone who wants to be with me, sure. Yeah, and then you get older and you have relationships and heartbreak, you break up.

And then that transitional period of knowing what you want for yourself, and then what you wanna give to someone else, and then having the patience to wait around for it because you suck. But like it's- The patience is hard. But it's also like once you're in the relationship,

it's so much work, you know? It's not like, you think it's like relationships are just gonna like save you, and then, you know, I was in a serious relationship for three years and it was great, and then after, you know, it was, you know, still great. It was just either single or in a relationship, it's like you kind of fantasize about the opposite of it.

You're like, oh, if I was single, like, I wouldn't have this, or like, if I'm, or like, you know, if I was in a relationship, I'll have someone to go with me. But it's like, I just kind of like don't even think about it anymore in that way, because I just know that I'm getting pickier as I get older and more intentional with stuff. And I never even knew what I liked. Like, I would just like, if someone was like,

showed interest in me, I'd be like, hype. You know, I'm like, yeah, I was like, for a long time in my life. And now it's a little bit more, you know, a little more discernment in that. Yeah, it's a, I had to figure out, there was a point before I met Natalie, where when I was in my twenties,

it was, you know, my parents were good role models, but the problem, sometimes the problem with the good role models is like my parents taught me love is important and you have to fight for it. So it was like, oh, okay, well then I'll just fight for this, see it out kind of thing. Sometimes it's fight, fight, fight, fight. Didn't need to do that.

So then I got older and I was like, okay, I finally figured out who I was in my late 20s, early 30s, and then took some risks and had a, you know, did reality TV and that was all kind of weird. But then, you know, so then I had this stint of reality TV and this controlled environment where they almost like make you feel like you're young again, and it's all about these emotions.

And then, so then I was dating, it was more like, I honestly, like, there was a point where in my 30s, I was honestly worried and I thought to myself, do I just need to pick somebody? Yeah. Do like, you know, like you'll do. Anybody. You know, like we get along.

Yeah. I guess. This could work. You seem nice enough. Yeah. You're obviously beautiful, but like, there's a part of me was like, am I too cynical? Am I looking for flaws? Am I looking, you know, and finding that balance

between the person who like knows who they are and can be patient, or am I looking for problems? Am I being avoidant or things like that? And I really struggle with that. And I mean, I remember having those, I remember I say to my therapist, like, do I just need to do this? Like, because I was afraid I wasn't gonna fall in love.

Because like when I was younger, you're just like, oh, I don't know what this feeling is. I think we should date. And I couldn't replicate that feeling unless I was in this controlled environment on a TV show. And I was like, you're looking for that thing. Does anyone exist with that thing? You know what I mean?

It can be a very scary feeling. It's super scary. I totally feel you. I feel like it's very confusing. It's also like you have to choose to just like, you have to really choose to be there every day. It's like a very active decision. So if something is not working out,

it can be like so hard to just like choose to be there, decide to like fix it. And then you have to know when to walk away. But it's also, I don't think there is a clear cut. There's no like, oh, you guys should break up or not. It's more like, what do you see for yourself? Yeah, no one's like, I broke up with them on the exact perfect day at the right time.

You're always gonna wonder one way or the other. You just kind of have to trust. You have to trust yourself. For me, I always just think about like, do I want to live my life like this? You know what I mean? Do I want to feel this way every day? If it's yes, then I'll continue.

But if no, like if I literally am like, this can't happen anymore and it's been enough time where we've talked about it, then it's like, okay. Then I guess I can make a decision for myself. If I feel bad now, but like, is this the norm? Or is this something that is happening now, but like? We can go come, yeah. If it gets, you know, the normal feeling

with this person or this relationship generally brings me joy and happiness, but right now, you know, I need to fix. Which happens, I mean, that's with any kind of relationship. A lot of people, it's more the opposite. It's like, you know, you ask them and they're like, I've been miserable for three years. Yeah. You know?

And they're like, but we've been together for eight years. I can't just throw it away. It's been eight years. You will think it's like a really big celebration, like oh, we've been together forever, which is great, but it's also like are you hanging on to something that is truly not serving a purpose in your life that is actually serving, you know what I mean?

Yeah, I totally agree. What's your love language? I like a lot of quality time, and actually, you know what, words of affirmation. Big, big words of affirmation kind of girl. Yeah, I love it. I like to hear good things. I like to make sure that you tell me.

I like to be told and comforted in that way. So when you're not cooking, working, making movies, what are your guilty pleasures where you just kind of check out and really kind of get into? So many things. I've started knitting recently and I've been knitting and I've been watching a lot of like either true crime podcasts, which is like very my mom.

Very my mom. Or I'll watch like, I watch the stupidest stuff. It's actually crazy. I was watching like the Beast games and like, you know, stuff like that's like just so, you know what I mean? It's like so fun to like, when I want to like the Beast games and stuff like that. It was so fun. When I wanna take a load off, I will truly get into Brain Raw in a big way.

So a lot of that. I was really into Milk Manor at one point. Love Milk Manor. Love Milk Manor. Is that the one Peter did? I believe so. That's with the older ladies. And the first season was like with the younger.

Yeah. Then my best friends. Yeah, but then they brought in the, they brought in the like, was it the dads and sons? Yes, Peter. It's incredible. Our friend show ran that. Oh my God, it's truly an incredible piece of,

I actually think it's like, it's amazing. And whenever I tell people about it, they're like, what does that mean? I'm like, MILF man or the MILFs and the sons, okay? And they're like, what does that mean? I'm like, MILF Manor, the MILFs and the Suns, okay? And they're like. But not a porn. No, but they clearly know what's trending. You know what I mean?

And it's smart, and it's really smart. Yeah, so I like to watch that. I like to hang out with my friends. Have you knitted anyone a sweater? No, I'm right now in the phase of knitting bandanas for my dog and cat. We're starting small. We're starting very small.

It's very hard to knit actually. And I've been like really getting into like the knit community around here. I go to like the small business. It's so cute. There's a yarn shop and like everyone there, it's like so much yarn is beautiful. And like people like, they have like classes there.

They like talk to you about knitting. I'm just like, I feel like I'm inducted into some sort of society. It's great. Sisters. It's fun. It's so cute. Everyone has like their cute little knits, you know?

Do you have like, what are you gonna knit when you really feel like you've got it down? I think like a dress. I wanna make like a little halter top dress. I used to, when I was a kid, I used to have a crochet string bikini. And by kid, I mean like two years old because my great grandma knitted it for me

or crocheted it for me. And so I kind of want to recreate it. I've been starting to like kind of recreate the bikini but it's really hard. So I just keep just making squares and triangles really. And you knit and watch TV? Yeah. Okay, yeah.

My grandmother Phyllis still with us was a, she would, I used to live with like one time, my then girlfriend at the time broke up and I was in my, we were engaged actually. But like, so we were living together, had to move out. Well, I hadn't had to move out. I wanted to get the fuck out of there. And then my grandmother, who I only refer to as Phyllis.

Cause when I was born, she was like 50 and she's like, I'm not ready to be a grandmother. I love that. And she lived downtown where, you know, in the city I lived in and I was like, I can't get the fuck out of here. So I like, I like had to shamefully, what felt at the time, like live with my grandma.

Which ended up being like a great time because she's a night owl and she, I would go out to the bars, hang out with my friends and come back and be like two in the morning. She's up knitting, watching TV. And then we would like download the night, you know? And I would talk about like my nights and things like that. And then it would, like, download the night, you know? And I would talk about, like, my nights and things like that. And it ended up being, like, just a very memorable...

I love it. I'm a grandma girl. Like, my grandma raised me, basically. My mom was in school and, like, worked at a restaurant, so I barely saw her. But my grandma raised me. I'm, like, such a grandma's girl. Like, my grandma and I are, like, very close. Was that hard for you when she went back to Brazil? Yes, I was 18, so I had... As soon as I moved out of the house,

she was like, I'm out, I'm gone. It was really hard, I just saw her over the holidays when I was in New York and it was really sweet. But yeah, it was really hard. Did you get back to Brazil much? I've been going more recently. I went last year, I went to Rio for work, and then my mom, I like to go to Bahia,

which is like my favorite place in Brazil. It's so wonderful, it's like there's a beach and it's just gorgeous. And I'm just like, but it's so far. It's truly like a 25 hour journey of many planes and drives and all sorts of things. But it's worth it. If I go, I stay for a while. So it's really nice.

Yeah, it's a- It's like little monkeys everywhere. It's truly, it's like a little storybook. It's like my mom will send me's like, it's truly, it's like a little like storybook. It's like, my mom will send me videos when she's there and she's just like, the monkeys are stealing my fruit, you know, and they're like tiny little cute little monkeys or like just giant sloths everywhere. I'm like, this is in Mudroads.

It's so cool. It's so cool. What is next for you? Like what, in the perfect world, do you have a dream job, a dream type of film, or even maybe a particular actor out there that you've always kind of maybe fascinated or dreamt about working with? Wow, manifestation time, yeah.

I think I've done a lot of contemporary stuff, like a lot of the things I've done, even the films that haven't come out yet, which I think this year a couple of them will come out. I really wanna make something that's kind of like a period piece. I really want to step outside of just the 2010s, 2020s. Is there a particular period that fascinates you the most? I feel like I would do pretty good in the 20s. Not like super period, but like 20s and maybe

like 40s or something. That's a great era. Yeah. I feel like that's kind of like the kind of like boudoir, like pinup kind of like, just like a lot of, I think that would be really cool. I mean, I'm open to whatever it is, but I think that'd be really nice. And I think, you know, my favorite actress is like Kate Blanchett. Like that, like obviously it would be my dream.

I think she's- Is there anyone in history that you would do like a biopic on? Oh my gosh, yeah. Who? Oh God. Let's see. Well, the thing is, is is, people are very picky with that because they're like, you don't look like this person.

I'm like, but what if I have prosthetics? You know what I mean? Yeah, you have no idea. It's 2025, but you have a good chance. I'm like, if the Penguin can happen with prosthetics and if people, you know, there was like the Tammy Faye, with Jessica Chastain. I'm like, but prosthetics happen.

I actually- If Colin Farrell can play the Penguin. Literally, with so much prosthetics. Come on now. Why can't I play InsurName here? Yeah. I don't know exactly Farrell can play the penguin. Literally, with so much prosthetics, come on now. Why can't I play into your name here? Yeah. I don't know exactly who I would play. I feel like it would have to.

Is there one that you're specifically drawn to from history that you're like, that would just be interesting to challenge yourself? I am fascinated by actresses of the past to kind of, I really love the theatrics of kind of old Hollywood. I don't know, I would say, maybe I shouldn't say it yet, but I am working on something that may or may not happen about someone of that nature.

So that's why I'm like, I don't know. I think of someone else and I was like, maybe I shouldn't really, no, not yet. But yeah, we'll see. Well, Barbie, this has been so much fun. Thank you for having me. This is so sweet. So fun to talk to.

Thank you, I really appreciate it. I could keep going, but I know you have to get going. Listen, she's busy. Thank you for taking the time. This has been so much fun. Congratulations on a very beautiful movie. Thank you. Everyone check it out.

Bob Trevino Likes It. And where? March 21st in select theaters in New York, LA and then March 28th in other theaters. Check it out. Check it out. It's a great friend film. It's a great film.

You go with your family. You will be emotional, but like it really. Most of my other work is not very family friendly. So this is the family friendly one. Very family friendly. You will wanna to watch, you'll see this film and you'll want to connect with people afterwards and I think that's a very beautiful thing that we all need today. So... Oh, thank you guys. Thank you. Thanks so much. So much fun to have with you. See you guys tomorrow. Bye. you