The Viall Files - E904 - Melanie Lynskey & Jason Ritter, Ari Shaffir, RHOBH, Temptation Island, Parenting & Side Hustles

Episode Date: March 20, 2025

Welcome back to The Viall Files: Reality Recap!  Today we’re ecstatic to be joined by the cutest couple in the world Melanie Lynskey and Jason Ritter to get into parenting, RHOBH, how incredible New Zealand Traitors is, and more! Plus, Ari Shaffir stops by to talk about his new special, takes on Sex and The City, and working in a cemetery. Meanwhile, we get into Tina Fey being anti rich person side hustles, Kylie Jenner’s latex school drop off fit, the Baldwins, the demise of Forever 21, and more! You will not want to miss…  “I’m the nicest guy in America. Everyone hates me.” Subscribe to The ENVY Media Newsletter Today: https://www.viallfiles.com/newsletter  OUT NOW! Listen to Humble Brag with Cynthia Bailey and Crystal Kung Minkoff. Available wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube:  https://www.youtube.com/@humblebragpod https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/humble-brag-with-crystal-and-cynthia/id1774286896 Start your 7 Day Free Trial of Viall Files + here: https://viallfiles.supportingcast.fm/  Please make sure to subscribe so you don’t miss an episode and as always send in your relationship questions to [e-mail] to be a part of our Monday episodes. Follow us on X/Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheViallFiles Listen To Disrespectfully now! Listen on Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/disrespectfully/id1516710301 Listen on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/0J6DW1KeDX6SpoVEuQpl7z?si=c35995a56b8d4038 Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCCh8MqSsiGkfJcWhkan0D0w To Order Nick’s Book Go To: http://www.viallfiles.com  If you would like to get some texting advice on Office Hours send an email to [e-mail] with “Texting Office Hours” in the subject line! To advertise on this podcast please email: [e-mail] or go to: https://advertising.libsyn.com/theviallfiles     THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSORS: Quip - Free your mouth today and save 20% sitewide, plus a FREE travel case and countertop stand at https://getquip.com/nick   Quince- Indulge in affordable luxury. Go to https://quince.com/viall for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. IQ Bar - IQBAR is offering our special podcast listeners 20% off all IQBAR products, plus get FREE shipping. Just text FILES to sixty-four thousand. DraftKings - Sign up with code VIALLFILES and wager a minimum of five dollars to receive FIVE HUNDRED CASINO SPINS ON A FEATURED GAME. Cymbiotika - Cymbiotika- wellness, made simple. Go to https://cymbiotika.com/viall for 20% off and Free Shipping. Beekeeper’s Naturals - Today, Beekeeper’s Naturals is offering you an exclusive offer. Go to https://beekeepersnaturals.com/viall or enter code VIALL to get 20%off your order.   Timestamps: (00:00) - Intro (07:38) - Household Headlines (24:32) - Welcome Melanie and Jason (31:07) - Bachelor and Traitors (40:45) - RHOBH (53:08) - Temptation Island (01:06:54) - Your Shows (01:09:46) - Parenthood (01:20:33) - More Temptation Island (01:30:33) - Fast food Brand Deal (01:32:42) - Ari Joins (02:09:27) - Outro Episode Socials: @viallfiles @nickviall @nnataliejjoy @msmelanielynskey @jason_ritter @arishaffir @ciaracrobinson @justinkaphillips @the_mare_bare @leahgsilberstein @dereklanerussell   

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Get quip quip.com slash Nick. What's going on everybody? Welcome back to another exciting episode of the Vile Files Reality Recap Edition. And boy, do we have a fun episode for you guys today. Melanie Linsky and her very charming husband, Jason Ritter, are joining us momentarily. Jason's been on the show a couple times. It's been a while, always a big Bachelor fan. He was here to recap some Bachelor episodes a while back.

It's first time having Melanie on. They are a very adorable couple. And they're also just big reality TV fans, and so we are excited to have them on as well. And later Ari Shaffir, a very hilarious comedian who has a new Netflix special out will join us as well. Nick's developed a new habit. I've developed a new habit?

Uh-oh. Good habit? Bad habit? Probably not great. A diabolical habit. Oh, we hate it. Yeah. So I know what this is. I know what you're gonna say. It's pretty. We hate it. Yeah. Okay, what is it?

So I know what this is, I know what you're gonna say. It's pretty crazy. Say it. He leaves chewed up wads of gum on random surfaces throughout our home. I've left. Several. I've left.

Wait, why is this a newly developed habit? At 44 years old. I remember seeing this. He just now started not throwing his gum in the trashcan. I feel like this was like a bit on like, in like Parent Trap or like an old movie where it was like, she would like take her gum out and like put it on her like headboard.

And I used to do that when I was like 10, thinking it was so cool. Oh. I know, I know, but you're not 10. Why is this happening? I don't know why. But it's in awful places. What do you mean?

Well. Bad dad here. This is a joking hazard. We all make mistakes. But it's in awful places. What do you mean? Well, Bad dad here. This is a joking hazard. We all make mistakes. He puts River down for a nap and rushes out of the room for some reason. Phone call. Don't know. Call.

Business. A business. As usual. Who knows what's happening. Well, I'm a chopper. What the fuck does that mean? Well, you know, you're putting your daughter to bed and you're. Oh. And so I. Well I'm a chomper. What the fuck does that mean? Well, you know, you're putting your daughter to bed

and you're. Oh, he smacks. She's like waking up her eye, like shut up. So I was like, oh, sorry, sorry, sweet, pretty little baby. And then I took the gum out and put it on this little nightstand. So I checked the monitor and she's like not asleep.

She's kind of just awake, chilling. And I'm like, okay, well I'll let her work it out. You know, she's not crying. She's just kind of hanging out in there and she loves her crib. So I would check back in every couple of minutes and she's laying down. She's sitting up, she's standing up, she's laying down. She's, and then I'm like, what am I doing? Like I might as well just go in there, you know, and like rock her and try to get her

back to sleep and thank God I do. She's got that gum all wrapped around her hands. No. I mean, just like stretching it, playing with it. I was like, oh my God. Is she ready for slime? She's a slime girl, yeah. Like three weeks before that, I caught her,

I wanna say it was Natalie's gum, but who knows? Who knows? Oh, now I leave gum on. Just in case the parent shamers pop out, I just want to make sure you both go down in flames. Yeah, for sure. Um. Thank you for protecting me.

But our daughter's so smart because like I caught her chewing gum. She was just. Oh, so she knew not to swallow it. Totally. I was like a little freaked out. Like, oh my God. And she was just chomping away.

Like good old dad. But even like Shug, our babysitter freaked out, like, oh my God. And she was just chomping away, like, good old dad. But even like Shug, our babysitter, she was like, so I found like several pieces of chewed up gum, like in random places. And I was like, yeah, no, I know. That is Nick. I will work on this. Did you ask her to guess?

She was like, there's one on her changing table and I feel like that the diaper trash can's right there. It's the most accessible trash can in the house, truly. I mean, it's just, it's right there. It's easy to throw away. Are you going back for these pieces of gum? Oh my God, no. And what may or may not be related news,

Natalie told me 17 times yesterday about this new article. Oh, okay. Oh, I think I know what you're talking about. Ellie told me 17 times yesterday about this new article. Oh, okay. Oh, I think I know what you're talking about. I just wanted to know if you go back for these chewed up pieces of gum, or are they part of the house? Like when you like put it down,

like are you coming back? I'll be honest, I have no recollection. Just swallow it. What do they say like when you're on the stand? I do not recall. I do not. I do not recall. And I plead the fifth.

It reminds me of that Justin Bieber deposition where he's like sitting and he's like in some lawyer's office, it's not a courtroom, but they're like showing him some videos and he's just the whole time. It's like, I don't recall. Yeah. I do not recall.

I do have a confession though. When I'm done with my gum and I don't know where to put it, I'll give it to Dani to swallow for me. To swallow? Yeah. I'm hearing so many. You also gave Dani Louie's umbilical cord to give to the dog to eat.

So you need to stop giving Dani things to dispose of. You are an eight wrong there. I had forgotten about that. Did you know that Nick? What? Leia, she was at the house with Louis and she was, she was at our house with Louis and she was talking about like, oh my gosh, how funny is this? Like whenever Louis' umbilical cord fell off, you know, it falls off like a week after you get home. Yeah.

Danny fed it to the dog. And I was like, what? On purpose? Yeah. It's a tradition in the family apparently. I was like, that was the way to do it. I was like, I'm not going to the dog. And I was like, what? On purpose? Yeah. It's a tradition in the family, apparently.

I was like, that was the way he was connected to you. And then by tradition, you mean like a Jewish tradition or just like a Danny? No, no, no, his family, every time they had an umbilical cord fall off, they would feed it to their dogs. You guys, this is making me nauseous. And like for me, I was like,

I have that saved somewhere. What other traditions do they have? Are they a sands or what? Well like for me, I was like, I have that saved. What other traditions do they have? Somewhere. Is there a same answer? Well, for me, I was like, oh my God, that was like the way that they were connected to us. Like you didn't save that. And she was like, oh my God, I didn't save it.

I had an existential crisis right there on your outdoor couch. I was like, fuck, why didn't I save that? Yeah, you were like, now I'm mad at Danny. Yeah, like why don't you just feed, you know, all your first photos of all these moments to your dog too. Like maybe a whole photo album. Any other special moments with your child?

Do you want to feed your dog? Well, marijuana users are now six times more likely to have a heart attack. Do you want to rethink your choices? Well, here's the thing, what's six times more likely to have a heart attack. Do you want to rethink your choices? Well, here's the thing. Six times higher than what? Than before. Well, maybe it was zero before and six times zero is still zero. Has Natalie told you the facts yet of this?

No, I'm just saying like a percentage is a relative. Please, Nick, listen. Well, so basically a new study of 4.6 million people found that cannabis users were more likely to experience heart failure, strokes, and cardiac arrest. Is it smoking weed or gummies or do we know? Well, so young marijuana users are six times more likely to have a heart attack than those who have abstained from the drug, according to a new study that analyzed data from 4.6 million people.

The study followed adults younger than 50 who didn't have any comorbidities. From 2010 to 2018, according to research, specifically cannabis users were six times more likely to have a heart attack, four times more likely to have an incisumic stroke. I may be wrong with the pronunciation. To the next point, more likely than what? Than the average person who's not smoking weed. Another marijuana user over here across the room.

Yeah, I'm fine. And I have no issues. I'm just saying six times zero is still zero. Why are you timesing it by zero? Well, because I don't know six times more than what. Like there are a lot of users. Literally, like six times. If there's a 1% chance that I have a heart attack

because of, you know, and then if it's six times more likely that's still, you know. I'm just saying, this is the medication that we're giving to like cancer patients, glaucoma, you know. I'm just saying, this is the medication that we're giving to like cancer patients, glaucoma, you know. It does specify, it says, cannabis use appears to pose a substantial and independent risk for those outcomes,

even in a population without traditional cardiovascular risk factors. So that's what it is for people that aren't already like at risk of like a heart attack. So it makes you at risk. I'm short of breath. Oh my God. It probably was that joint outside. I'm short of breath. Oh my God. It probably was that joint outside.

I think that's brain cancer. That's a heart attack? That's a burnt toast. Is your arm hurting? I think arms, left arm hurting. Heart attack. Okay. I think I'm okay.

Smelling burnt toast is a stroke. Okay. I think I'm good. In other news, Ryan Rales requests that he be dropped from Justin Baldoni's lawsuit. Ryan Rales is asking a judge to drop him as a defendant from Justin Baldoni's 400 million lawsuit claiming Justin Baldoni's argument against him

has no legal bounds and amounts to hurt feelings, which all the Justin Baldoni stands are up in arms. But makes sense to me. I don't know why, is he just being sued because he's married to Blake? There's all this speculation about the Deadpool or Nice Pool, whatever, in his movie. I don't think that's illegal.

Can you just sue anyone who's just mean to you? I think anyone can sue anyone for anything, but when it goes to the court and things like that, I think there are certain legal. Because I'm coming for you trolls. I think there's certain legal things that hold water coming for you trolls. I think there's certain legal things that hold water or not. Could you imagine if I became a billionaire

and it was just off suing people in my comments who were mean to me? I'm such a. I'm trying to remember the comment, what was the weird word that they're trying to say a word. Oh, indoors. Endorse, okay. They're only here to see what I indoors.

Watch out. We'll see what happens with that case. We should probably bring back Emily Baker sooner than later to have her break down any updates in this case, but we will follow along. Not sure if this will be granted or not, but we shall see. It makes sense to me,

because I just don't know, it seemed almost when he was brought into that lawsuit it just seemed almost Well retaliatory and kind of almost like oh well, I'm gonna go after you You know it's like he didn't work on the side I mean obviously all these like theories and stuff like that, but we'll see we'll see what happens with that case Tina Fey This is interesting admits that she judges rich people, isn't she rich? Who have side hustles. Yeah, she's not judging herself.

She's judging her peers who are also rich, who feel the need to start a liquor company. A beauty brand. Yeah, or start like a... Hair company. A hair company, an active wear brand. I mean, I don't know, I just, for me... Because you know that they're not that involved.

Who cares? That's all- They're only doing it to make more money. Have you walked into Narawan? Every brand is a celebrity brand, if you think about it. Well, celebrity brands are the, some of them are very successful,

some of them are less than successful, but like, I don't know. Listen, my big thing is like, I don't know what Tina Fey's wealth is, but it sounds like she's up there. She's very successful, had a sounds like she's up there. She's very successful at a lot of successful projects. When super rich people have opinions about how other rich people make and spend their

money, I'm just like, I'm uninterested in that opinion. That's just my opinion. I find it fascinating. I do. I mean, I think she was being funny, and I think it was an interesting take of like, I'm judging you for needing to have a side hustle when like you already make billions of dollars. If your rate's like $8 million on a movie,

but then it's like, you know what, fuck it. Let's throw tequila brand on top of that. I'll shoot a commercial once in a while. Like I get it. Where she's just saying like, I kind of hate money. I have a problem with rich people having a side hustle. If you already have like 200 million, I judge it. How much of that money she hates has she given away? I mean, I don't know about her philanthropic endeavors, but I'm sure if she hates it, she probably does give.

I don't know, and like I say, if an actor makes $8 million on a movie, about 25% of that is just taken away off the top to their agents and managers and lawyers, so bam, 25% gone. Then half of that, the government takes. So you got, let's say, $8 million, what's 25% of aid?

So you've got, let's say, $8 million, and you've got, let's say, $20 million, and you've got, let's say, $20 million, to like their agents and managers and lawyers. So bam, 25% gone. Then half of that the government takes. So you got, let's say eight million, what's 25% of eight million? Take two million off, you got six million left. Now all of a sudden eight million becomes three million. And what if they bought a- And Nick loves math.

I cannot fact check a single thing you just said. I'm the meme where- I can't even fact check that. Where the woman's just staring out and it's all the equations floating around her head. Yeah, literally. I don't know, and maybe they got a couple of family members to take care of and things like all the equations floating around her head. Yeah, literally. I don't know, maybe they got a couple family members to take care of and things like that. Maybe someone came into them and said,

hey, you wanna start a t-shirt line or something? They're like, great, and then maybe that blew up. And Tina's just saying, like, I just judge you a little bit for being like, also, she's saying it's a little cringy. Has Tina Fey ever done a commercial? Yes. And like, couldn't that be,

she's still acting. Couldn't it be that they thought it was like a side hustle? like, couldn't that be... She's still acting. Couldn't that be thought of as like a side hustle? She's still acting. Oh, she's still acting. Oh. You know when she's like holding a shoe? It's still acting. Acting.

Yeah. I'm acting at the table. I mean like, yeah. She's entitled to her opinion. I don't know. It's just more like... It's just like when she's... I'm guessing doesn't have to worry

or worry about money point... like period. I don't think Kylie Jenner has to worry about money. She's incredibly successful being a producer herself. But have you ever judged your peers for like doing something that you feel is a little cringey? Cringey, sure.

And that's what she's saying. She's saying that like George Clooney, not George Clooney, but example George Clooney having his tequila company is a little cringe. I mean, I don't know when he started or what he was worth, but like he made a ton of money from it. I respect the side hustle too, where I'm like, listen, if I don't wanna do 500 movies this year

and I can make the same amount endorsing a brand, by all means do it. But I also think that the opinion's kind of funny. But also like Tina Fey, like she's an actor, she's a producer, she's a writer. Aren't those kind of side hustles? She doesn't just do one job. They're all one umbrella. Yeah.

And what is that umbrella? Creator, entertainment, actor. No, her, yeah. Okay, and so let's say George Clooney, like I'm sure he used his celebrity and his marketing ability or like just his good face. Like his celebrity, how is that really different than what Tina Fey is doing?

Look, it's like they don't use like real tequila in movies, right? It's like water. So it's like these are two very different things. It's not like- He's not acting like he likes his tequila company. Maybe he is. Then that's bogged off. He's also not sending out emails being like,

who wants to collaborate with Castamigo? There's a lot of actors out there who get maybe one job every five years. But by all means, and that's what I'm saying, where maybe that's not your side hustle, that's your main hustle. But as soon as they make money, they're like, no, I'm just, I don't know. I think it's a very she's in a very convenient position to have an opinion like this. And it's like, OK. I think it's her being funny and being cheeky and just like calling out some of her friends. And it's like the fact that she would do this to people

is really fucked up. Like really fucking it up for the rest of us rich people. I'm just gonna chew my gum. It's not my way. You know what? If a celebrity endorsed or invested in Forever 21, it may still be here. Honestly, it had good.

See, that's what I'm saying. We needed a side hustling celebrity to save America's favorite brand. I don't know my favorite brand. Yeah, it was it's time to go. That was a hellscape to walk into one of those stores. Oh for sure. No, first of all, nothing was ever organized.

You walked in in immediate anxiety. I'm looking at army print next to fluffy pink jackets. Also, there's like the running joke of, oh my God, this cute white like t-shirt. And you pick it up and it's like puppy lover on the back. And you're like, what the fuck? Yeah. Come on. We're doing so well.

So honestly, it was time. R.I.P. Forever 21 honestly had a great run. The shoes that I was wearing the day that I met Nick are Forever 21. And I will never get rid of them because they hold such a special place. Honestly, some of my older pieces from Forever 21 still hold up. It was like once they turned into like,

wash it once and it shreds, then it's like, yeah, I can't shop here. But I used to love it. Is anyone watching the Bald Winds show? Like, it's been out. Like, have people talked about it? Does anyone give a shit? I haven't heard anybody. They do.

They're watching. Do you think they're still promoting this? Oh, because like they are an example of everything I don't want us to be. Oh yeah, no, there's a clip of them on a red carpet where it was crazy. The interviewer asks a question to like both of them. And she-

Even if it was kind of directed to her. She kind of like starts answering and then he's like, he starts complimenting her. He's like, she's a star. Like she's amazing. And she's like if it was kind of directed to her. She kind of like starts answering and then he's like, he starts complimenting her. He's like, she's a star. Like she's amazing. And she's like, I was talking. Don't interrupt me when I'm talking. When I talk you-

On his face. And he looked like he- He was like, I'm sorry. And like looked down. It was so sad. And he looked dead inside. He looked like a broken man. When I'm talking, you're not talking.

In front of people? I'm on a red carpet in an interview. Are you my mother? Like, how, like this man has been through a lot and now you're like snapping at him. It's like get a podcast and talk some shit to each other for fun like we do. Like, oh my God, don't bring it to the red carpet

and like yell at your spouse to the point where they just like die inside. But also that sentence like when I'm talking you're not talking is such a degrading sentence. Like there's a way to be like honey could you not interrupt me like I was in the middle of a set like story. You know like there's a way to say like hey wait your turn. It's also giving like mother of seven she was like and eight and eight. Yeah, that's true. That's true. I mean, I don't know, it's just. That gives zero patience in the fact

that he wasn't even like shocked by it. He said, I'm sorry and looked down at the ground. Like the saddest face I've ever seen. We know who is running that household. What would you, what do you, what do we think is a pro? You know what, let's ask our guests because I think they just got done from dropping off their child at school.

And we can find out what they think is appropriate to pick your kids up at school, because there was a Kylie Jenner video that has since been taken down. I went to find it and as of now it's not up. It's a collab with a brand that she's dropping a latex dress. Her bitties are out and like.

Her what? What was the first one? I almost said bitties. Sorry guys, this is gay. He doesnitties are out and like. Her what? What was the first one? I almost said itties. Sorry guys, she's gay. He doesn't know to talk about boobs. I was trying to blend over it in like a PC way. Her shitties. Her tata's were out, okay.

And like basically, I mean, I took it as she was joking, like in the heart of like promoting the dress, but she was like, yeah, like I would pick up my kid in this dress. Was she being sarcastic? Probably. I took it as like being funny, maybe not sarcastic, but it's like-

Maybe not that serious. It's not serious. Like Tina Fey. Oh, well, there you go. Anyways, the internet is outraged. Well, you know, whatever. But why? As they should be.

And not that they should be, but that's just what they do. It's just, it's so apparent, it's a joke. And even if she does pick up her kids and like, why does it bother you? Yeah, because- She knows the school- Because husbands. You know the school- Because husbands, exactly. and it's a joke and even if she does pick up her kids and like, why does it bother you? She knows the school. Because husbands. Because husbands, exactly.

But you know the school she's going to is like the school with all of the other famous celebrity children. And I'm sure they're all picking up their kids also in like a latex dress as well. So it's like, they're just all in one. Yeah, do you think like with like, are there schools that are just riddled with celebrity kids?

Yes. There are. Yeah. Oh yeah. There's a ton of schools that I could name of like celebrities and normal people going to. Yeah, up towards. Do you think it's like a red carpet every day? No, I don't, but I do like, I hear stories from people being like,

oh yeah, or like when my friends used to nanny them and they'd be like, oh yeah, sure, at least they're on just came and picked up her kid while I was waiting for like mine. And it's just like, that's crazy. Just on a Tuesday. Maybe our guests will have some thoughts on what they wear when they pick up their kids,

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and expire in 168 hours. See terms at casino.draftkings.com slash promos ends for 2725 at 1159 PM Eastern time. Melanie and Jason, welcome to the show. Thank you so much. Welcome back Jason. Thank you very much. Welcome Melanie. Thank you.

Thank you for having me. So good to have you both. I've been, we've texted a few times about coming on. Obviously you guys are busy with life and being parents, but it's just, it's great to have you back and have you on for the first time. Yeah. It all worked out. Yeah.

I mean, I had absolutely zero idea that you had this accent. Oh, really? Yeah. And I feel like I've watched so obviously I've watched so much of your work, but just, I feel like I've watched you on red carpets and it's never clicked for me. And then meeting you in person, I'm like, oh, yes, of course. When I'm actually talking, I try to say as little as possible on a red carpet because I'm so anxious.

I'm just trying to get through it. Just get through, just get done. You're from New Zealand. I'm from New Zealand, yes. I went there once. Oh, did you like it? I loved it, yeah. Well, I was there filming a show called Special Forces.

Oh, right. I was quite tortured there. Well, I was there filming a show called Special Forces. So I was quite tortured there. The experience itself was great. Beautiful. I mean, like food. Amazing. Where were you? What part? Queenstown. Oh, so beautiful. Gorgeous. It was like June, July, but it was winter there. Yeah. So beautiful.

Wonderful food. Yeah. Very good food. Queenstown is amazing. We got to see that show. We've never seen that show. I know. Yeah, just wonderful food. Yeah, very good food. It's so beautiful there. Queenstown is amazing. We gotta see that show. We've never seen that show. I know, yeah. You've never watched Special Forces? No. No. It's a good mix of like-

It's a good family show. Yeah, it is a good family show. Yeah. I didn't realize who watched it, but then after I was on it, young families with their kids would approach me. Oh, that's so cool. And it kinda made sense,

because when you watch it back, it's, you know, it's. Good, clean fun. It is, right? It's all about like, you know, resiliency and fighting through adversity. And it's, you know, it's on Fox, which is network, and it's pretty, it's pretty clean. Yeah, yeah.

So families can watch it together. How many kids do you all have? Just one. She's six. Oh, my god. We have one, she's 13 months old. Oh, can I show you a video? Oh my gosh, please we just got this today. Oh, she has her Morning bedhead, but she's walking the dog walking the dog

My gosh, she's like right on the vert She's like says mama and dad and like she's saying words and like recognizing pictures and things like that. But like you could, it feel like she's at the age where she's, she doesn't know how to say things, but like she, you can tell she's processing. Oh yeah. So it's a very fun age. It all happens.

It happens so quickly. Like this morning on the way to drop her off to school, she told both of us that our hair was too crazy to do an interview today. Oh. Yeah. Too crazy. We both had to fix our hair before we came because she's like, what are you guys doing today?

And we're like, oh, we're going to go into, she's like, well, your hair is too crazy. You gotta fix it. Dad up, mama. Oh my gosh. Yeah, hopefully fix. We did what we could. Yeah, I know it's looking great now.

I don't know what you changed. Oh, thank you. A lot, I know. It's looking great now. I don't know what you changed. Thank you. A lot. A lot. Took a shower. Yeah. It is crazy to watch her like, because yeah, she can't really say a lot, but if I'm like, oh, can you put this over there on that stool and she will go and do it.

It's so wild. Yeah. It's really crazy. When do you feel like her personality really came out and started to be who she is today? It was always there. I think it is weird is it's like it's like something slowly being revealed So initially you're like I it just seems like a baby And then even when you see other babies you start to realize like oh No, that's actually some only something that our daughter does or whatever.

And then as they get older, you realize that, yeah, it was kind of always there. Wow. Yeah. It kind of makes sense because you almost have to like, as you're there every day, you get to know your kid.

And yeah, when you're talking about that, like the way River smiled, it's just like, yeah, I guess she always kind of smiled this way. Or kind of had this, but you don't really appreciate it when it first happened. You don't know if it's her thing or just something babies do. Yeah, exactly.

Is it a universal thing? Is she a genius or is she just like kind of normal developing skills? Exactly. Because it's like every day there's this like, she seems to be learning something new. And I'm like, wow. Yeah, yeah. Genius. She's probably a genius. It's like every day there's this like, she seems to be learning something new and I'm like, wow. Yeah.

Yeah. She's probably a genius. It's incredible. But it is nice when they start being able to use their words and then, you know, as soon as our daughter could say cat, we knew that she was obsessed with cats and she's been obsessed with cats for forever.

Was that her first word? No, her first word was moon. Moon. Yeah, moon other than mama and dada. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh my gosh. She pointed to the sky and she said moon. Oh, that's so sweet.

And we were like, oh my gosh. Yeah, it was really cute. Rivers is dog, right? That was like her first word, because we have two dogs. I think it was very easy to just get that. But yeah, it was over Thanksgiving, we're at our sister's house and they have lots of dogs.

And she just like pointed and said dog. Oh my gosh. Because before that it was like mama and. And she just like pointed and said dog. Oh my God. Cause before that it was like mama and data were just like things she learned. Yeah. She kind of says mama and data for a lot of things right now. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. It was like, I don't know, it was a really Doc, doc, doc, doc. Yeah, she points them out. And now it's like, she'll hear a bird, you're like tweeting or calling and she will like, caw, caw.

It's so sweet. It's really cool to like watch them grow into human beings. We were talking before y'all came in here about Kylie Jenner recently has gone viral for saying she would pick her kids up from school in a latex dress that she was wearing. And so- The internet obviously-

The internet interneted. Did their thing. How would you feel if you were like, oh, let me just put on this latex dress to go pick up my kids. Are you dressing up to pick up the kids? Or are we in like a robe and pajamas? We put on our latex as soon as we get home. No, of course.

When the kids are gone, the latex comes out. I mean, I think that's awesome. There really is like at our daughter's school, there's a range. Most people are pretty comfortable. Yeah. Yeah. Somebody said one day they were like,

oh, you always know who's in the industry because they're either not here or they're in pajamas. And I was like, they're not pajamas. I know. That's not quite. That's so judgmental. It's the cashmere sputter. Yes.

Oh, okay. Oh my okay. What are the non-industry great parents wearing? A pant suit. A pant suit maybe. A lot of people are in pajamas. A lot of people are in pajamas. I feel like that would be me with an open mug of coffee and my robe on and flippers.

We've definitely brought the coffee into, especially assembly mornings. Oh yeah. Yeah. Jason, you obviously came on a while back to talk of some bachelor back in the day. Is that something you guys are still watching? You know, a lot of people have fallen off here or there.

We missed the last. The last like three, I think. Yeah. What was it for you guys that kind that just didn't do it for you? I don't know. I mean, we always liked it. There's just so many shows. There's so many great shows and we got sucked into some of the Netflix dating shows and

the Traders. I think also we have so little time at night. Once we get our daughter down and then to watch something that's two hours and then like Oscar voting. Oh yeah. We had to watch so many movies. And it was like, I don't know.

And then we just sort of ended up not getting into it. And also once you go into like some of the other shows and you realize how just crazy those are, you go back to like the Bachelor recipe and you're like, okay. Oh. It's always so fun. Like we always do really get into it.

Whenever we, yeah, we start it, we get sucked in and we're in for a whole season. We've never like jumped off mid season. No. And I like Grant, it's Grant, right? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

He seems like a Bachelor. Yeah, we've had a chance to interview him a couple of times.? Yeah. Yeah. He seems like a good bachelor. Yeah, we've had a chance to interview him a couple of times. Lovely man. Yeah, he seems like a really lovely guy. Also, he did a really good job this season of not saying thanks for sharing. Every time someone said something emotional where like a lot of the bachelors before him

were like, I don't know what to do in this moment of you actually sharing. So they kind of awkwardly just go, thanks. Thanks for sharing. I know, imagine if you shared what is usually your deepest trauma with somebody and they were just like, thanks for sharing. You just, you'd feel so shut down.

Yeah, thank you so much for giving me that information. Do you wanna like do fantasy sweets? Yeah, exactly. It is strange that like trauma dump dinners. They do. Like why is it needed? And they're doing it earlier and earlier it feels like. Yeah. Which is.

I think it's lazy producing. Is it like a formula they think, oh, it's going to get the viewers on this person's side and make them connect or? I think so. I mean, it's, I mean, they've always done that, but like it feels like the past few seasons, it's almost become like a trope where it was like, yeah, they really, you know, and I think, do you think part of it has to do with like,

the show has been around so long and that like it's hard for them to cast anyone who hasn't grown up with it or seen it so many times and they think that's what they're supposed to say. But like, so there's a part of that they come in with. And I think at least, I don't know, maybe some of the producers just, that's their shtick. You know, and so they just think,

oh, I guess we're supposed to do that, but it's always just weird, you know? And then it becomes like a competition of stories. And the next thing you know, you have someone being like, you know, I've, you know, I just, you know, ADD. And like, you know, I've just, you know, 80 D and like, not that that's not, but like, I mean, I, you know, I guess, but like, you know, it becomes like this thing where everyone's just kind of watering down

these various things where it's like, it's almost like a competition, you know, in a way, where it just feels like, you know, are you saying this because you really wanna open up? Are you saying this because that's the show? Try to send me home now. I just told you the most tragic story in the world. Yeah.

So what are you guys enjoying right now? The Traders. Yeah. We went straight from the US Traders to the new season of the British Traders. What is better? Is that a celebrity one or is that? No. It's not.

Have you not seen it? Uh-uh. Uh-uh. It's good. First of all. But is it, how do you feel about it? Like, do you think it's better to see just normal people fighting for this or do you like the aspect of like the celebrities?

There's definitely an element of like, you know, I don't know. I guess I don't really know what the celebrities, like what they do with the money, if it goes to charity or to themself. I don't know, but there is- But a lot of them do need the money, I will say. Not everyone's like so rich. No, that's true. But there is something about like just seeing a bunch of people who are just playing a game who also don't have like, oh, I know what it's like to be on TV or- That's the nice thing. You know, like they are...

I mean, a villain will really expose themselves on, like, just because that's who they are. There's one person on one of the seasons from a different country that is like chilling. But, you know, it's... Like it's full sociopath. Yeah. Oh, my gosh.

It was crazy. We've watched all of them. Yeah, everyone that we can get our hands on. Yeah, the New Zealand. It's fun. It was crazy. We've watched all of them. Yeah, every one that we can get our hands on. Yeah. The New Zealand one is really fun because they're, first of all, New Zealanders are so good at sniffing out bullshit. So they just find the traitors. Immediately. Immediately.

And they're just like, oh, so sorry, mate. I just think you're a traitor. Oh, I am. It's been really hard. I haven't enjoyed it. And then it's just like so funny. They're so kind to each other. Nobody's backstabbing. It's really fun. Would you ever do it if you were asked?

Not in a million years. I probably would. You would? I love that. I love Mafia. I love that game. I love all of that. I love trying to figure stuff out. I also love trying to figure out how to lie if that's what it requires. It's fun.

It's kind of, I don't think I'm a good liar. You know, I think I guess I could if I want to, but there's a icky feeling and then like- It's comforting. Thank God. Yeah. It's like, I'm really good at lying. I lie all the time. I cannot stop lying.

I truly can't stop. I have a lying Jesus. Everything in my life is a huge lie. But like with the game, when you're supposed, like you wouldn't like swear on anyone's life. No. Some of that stuff is like, it's just a game. I don't know if I need to swear on anything meaningful.

We have a rule at home when we play mafia, when we have mafia at our house, there's a rule that nobody can swear on anything meaningful. We have a rule at home when we play mafia, when we have mafia at our house, there's a rule that nobody can swear on anything. It's based on my ex-husband swearing on our marriage once. That's trauma. Yeah. And you're like, see? Yeah, and it worked.

You believed him and then. I did believe him. And then. And he was? I was like, he's not in the mafia. He'd never swear on our marriage. He's not in the mafia. He's poor, Jimmy.

He's such a wonderful person. He's just a good game player. He's like, he was like, people are going to believe me. You believe me. I mean, I was shaken. Yeah, we had at least we started. I have my little group of friends and I, we've all played this game called the resistance, and it's also a lying game. It's kind of like mafia on crack or something.

It's just very fast, just a lot of lies. And we started with like, this is a moral gray area safe zone. You can say whatever you want, you can do whatever you want. And then slowly we had to be like, okay, but you're not allowed to do that, because that's crazy.

Yeah, and that's way too far. That'd be weird if someone was in there. And that hurt my feelings. I've been cheating on my wife this whole time. Oh my God. Wait, no, wait, what? No, you said, there's more gray hair. Now you all are in on it.

Would either of you wanna go on the traitors? Yes. Yeah? The opportunity has been presented early in the past. I just couldn't make it work. I hope someday I get the chance with the show and our daughter and just like, I hope I get the chance to do it. It'd be a lot of fun.

It'd be so good. It'd be so good. I think it'd be okay. I think I would come in with a little Target on my back. Cause it is, yeah, if they're doing it how they've done it in the past, it is like majority of reality TV stars. And this show, we talk a lot about reality TV.

We've shared some opinions. Oh, of course. Maybe they have some enemies along the way that are mad that he called them something. With love, I was like, I was just talking about your character. But you seem lovely in person. And then I think some people think of me as like,

you know, strategic or whatever, and like on fan forums for the show, I guess I get brought up as someone who like, we interviewed Derek from this season, and he was saying, oh, I thought you were gonna be on this season. So I kind of looked you up and, you know, yada, yada, yada, and you know,

I think you, I thought you were gonna be good. So it's like, you don't want really people to know much about you. Yeah. about you or have really any opinion of you especially like your game playing abilities if you have them. But that being said, I always kind of get shocked with the celebrity traders is like how the gamers don't really kind of get targeted. It's always like this year is the housewives.

It's like, why are we going after the housewives? And it's like every season, they pick at least one gamer to be a trader. Yeah, yeah. And you would think that the people there would be like, well, someone, one of these gamers is definitely a trader. And until we suss them out, like, let's just keep focusing on them.

Cause they're also still the best ones too. Absolutely. Everyone else is going off vibes. Carolyn was- Yeah, exactly. Yeah. She was amazing. She was so good. Her instincts were so good, every time. And I gotta say, I think I'm a fairly decent people reader,

but when we interviewed her and she came in, it was a bit of like a hectic, she landed and we were leaving LA, she was coming into LA, so it was a bit hectic, but like she really keeps doing her toes, because she's always fucking with you. And she obviously has kind of eccentric appearance,

and you're just like, I don't know what to make of it. You're too busy just trying to learn about Carolyn. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Whether or not she's a traitor or not a traitor, I can see why she flew under the radar as long as she does. She was a great choice. Amazing choice. Bev Hills, are you guys up to date on Bev Hills? I think so.

I think we are, yeah. You saw the Sutton on trial at sea? No! No, we missed it. Has that aired? That was, I think that was last night. That was last night. That was last night.

Oh, last night, that's right. Yeah, I came on last night. Well, we were still on the UK Traders last night. We were. Watching Claudia Winkleman. But We've gotten everything up to that. Okay. So who are some of your favorite, like where are we standing with like DeRite and Sutton or DeRite and Kyle?

How do you guys see the group these days? It is interesting how it like shifts over time. Like I've come to really enjoy characters that I had a tough time seeing who they were. But I think anytime someone goes through like a really tough time, like I think Dorit with the break in and all of those things that like really, and through this divorce, it's like, it's humanized her in a lot of ways for me. And so I feel sad about the Kyle and Dorit thing, because I just feel like they're both in so much pain and they both, I think, have a hard time talking

to their soon to be ex-husbands about it. So it's like they come at each other when they could be hugging and crying. Well, last night's episode, Erica kind of came for Sutton a little bit and she, you know, when you go back and watch it, it'll be interesting. Well, cause I'm sure y'all saw the for Sutton a little bit. And she, you know, when you go back and watch, it'll be interesting. Well, cause I'm sure y'all saw the whole Sutton comment

of like, our wallets don't, like, you need to mess with someone whose wallet matches. Yeah, she goes for the jugular. She really does. She like will go, if you're, yeah, she will just, when she comes in ready to go. Well, yeah, and that was kind of Erica's gripe. So Erica kind of very, you know, she really, she owned that.

I love Erica. She delivered it very well. Erica has clearly done a lot of work and the way that she's like laying things out and being able to step away and take a deep breath and come back, I'm very impressed with that. She was so, she like, so she, I'm excited for you guys to watch it,

but she was so calm and she was just like, so listen Sutton, I've just kind of noticed that for whatever reason, you seem to come at some of these ladies in the group when they're at their lowest. And then you're as a viewer, you're like, hmm, yeah, I guess. And then she was like, well, you know,

you kind of did it with me. You did it with Kyle. And now you're doing it with Dorit. And then she was like, well, you know, you kind of did it with me. You did it with Kyle. And now you're doing it with Dorit. And like Sutton just loses it. Oh really? Well because, I mean, and you know, and then there's this whole semantics argument

where Erica said like, you go after women. You bring women down. You bring the women down at their lowest. So Sutton's like, basically accused Erica of saying that like, Sutton hates all women or something. And Erica's like, well, no, here's three examples. You know, she has a thing.

She came with like three examples and it was like. Yeah, sisterhood conversation. And it makes a lot of sense because Sutton always seems lovely. Justin's a huge Sutton fan. I'll defend her to the grave. Yeah. And what is it?

What is it about? Well, I mean, I based it in like my experience of meeting her. But I think she's like, she'll have a genuine conversation with you even if you are a normal person. And I just take it as, I take it as she says it, how she sees it.

Like she's gonna ask the questions people aren't asking. I will say I got a chance to meet her and she was lovely. She was very nice. And it was, that's why I'm always sort of surprised on the show when she feels attacked, how intense her comments to, like it's further than like that hurt my feelings and I wanna tell you, it's like, I wanna hurt you so bad.

Yeah. She gets like vicious. And as soon as you say like Sutton, can I, and then you could see her just kinda, and just like, as soon as you give that note, she's like, and it just pots. And you're just like, well, I was just trying to. Construct the fix. I do feel for her.

I feel, you know, I think that comes from a lot of pain as well, but you know, it's such, and it's such a hard thing to deconstruct, like Erica has done. When you're feeling attacked, you can step back, take a deep breath, figure out if you actually are being attacked. But I think she, when she feels attacked,

she goes into like super fight mode. And if she could, if she could like snip that button to response and be able to take a breath and think, is this actually what's happening? I hope, I wish that for her, but it is fun to watch. Erika really has come a long way. I had always had a hard time with the whole earring controversy.

Oh yeah. I was like, just come away. Regardless, for her to be, however they were able to live the lives that they lived back in the day when they lived this life of opulence and luxury, for her to lose seemingly all that, get this, and again, I'm sure it's a very lovely place,

and it's in Bev Hills, so I'm sure also, probably still really expensive, but just the shift in her to make the most of a completely different lifestyle and a complete, you know, it's hard for anyone. And they're, you know, when a lot of people lose that much, they don't often pick themselves back up and reinvent themselves.

You gotta give her a lot of credit for that. Yeah, it's pretty amazing. And I also really had a hard time when all of that stuff was happening, when everyone was like, well, of course she knew what he was doing. She's not like in his law firm, like looking over the books. He definitely didn't seem like the type, well, he definitely didn't seem like the type who at the dinner table was like,

honey, let me tell you about all of my clients. I mean, you go to a family of four, but I thought you would have looked good in these ads. Yeah, I thought maybe you need a private jet. Like, oh, it's so awful. I was supposed to go to a family of four, but I thought you would have looked good in these things. Yeah, I thought maybe you need a private jet. Like, and, oh, it's so awful. I've also seen a lot of rich people who have, you know, they have a certain lifestyle and when things start to like go wrong,

they keep up appearances and it becomes like a pyramid scheme and they're borrowing and like, and so, you know, I think your much younger wife would be someone that you wouldn't be like, listen, I'm in trouble. Yeah. You know, you're like trying to still keep up appearances of I got you, I can do this, I can do this.

And he was never my favorite, but I, I. Oh, he was so horrible to her. I know, God. She's really come, she's really come a long way. She's come a long way. We may never see another or what. I know. Which makes me a bit sad.

She's so still though, she's like a queen. I keep on studying her. Cause she's so powerful. I was on Dancing with the Stars with her way back when. And I'm a bit introverted outside of talking for a living. And so is Erica. And she's so, she's, but you know, yeah. But like she's, she's tall, she's beautiful. She like sometimes I will get criticism

for being unapproachable or aloof or looking like my face looks like a dick. I've been told, you know, and Erica can be very intimidating. But when you go up to her and talk to her, she's so nice and chill and cool, but like she is intimidating. Yeah, in person.

And a lot of it is just kind of her quietness and she's comfortable just kind of sitting in the background. Well, yeah, that's very nerve wracking for people sometimes. Absolutely. I think she allows, you know, I feel like I meet someone and I'm like,

how can I show you that I'm not a threat? And you know, and she's just like, hello. You know, she has like, she doesn't matter what you think of her. She, she is very like in her body, which is cool. I don't need to talk to feel awkward. Exactly. That's a you problem. Exactly.

I wish I had that. You should try. I'll try. Just go around being kind of calm and slightly. Or what? Are there any Housewives franchises you guys enjoy these days? That's the main one.

That's the only one we really watch. I also, I'm like you, I'm for Kyle. I'm kind of like, she can do no wrong. That's what I'm like with Kyle too. I just think she's at least trying and she's honest and she's trying to bring people together. And not that she's like never made any mistakes, but I just, I feel like she's a good person at heart.

I think they're all- I feel that way too. I think also, I mean, in this episode you'll see, but like Garcelle really is just, she doesn't drop the Morgan weight of it all, and it's like. Yeah. But I kinda get Garcelle's point of view. She calls out Sutton for basically

being in Kyle's back pockets. Like, you're this with all the other ladies, but when it comes to Kyle, you always give her a pass. And then there's a moment in the episode where there's like an example of it, where, you know, Kyle doesn't have Sutton's back, but Sutton doesn't call her out, but she'll call up the other women. I guess I get where Grisel's coming from because I could never do what these ladies do. Like the housewives, like what they give to the audience.

It's true. It's unbelievable. Do you think they like, you know, there's that cartoon with the wolf and the sheepdog and they like clock out at the end of the day and they like fight all day and then they're like, morning Fred. I feel like honestly they have to.

Do they do that? Like they're friends afterwards? I feel like they have the attitude to remain sane. Right? I mean, it's like, you just carried all that. But sometimes it's so mean that like, how can you can be like, that was too far. I know.

Well, talking to a lot of housewives, there's real feelings that go outside of doing these episodes and these scenes. I think it's a mix of both. I think some of them, you know, it's a job. Right. But they are human beings. And when someone's just screaming at your face

and calling you out, it's intense. It's intense. And usually I don't think, you know, it's reality TV. So the, you know, the idea is no one's an actor, they're not, it's supposed to be authentic. So you're not like, hey, I'm gonna yell at you in 10 minutes. You just come in and you make a decision,

you caught that person off guard. But I guess back to the Garcellovel, I get it where it's just like, we've been asked to do certain things and it's just like, no. Like, we have the show, we've been asked to do certain things and it's just like, no. We have the show, we like to share some things about our relationship and our family, we pick and choose, but we get to decide what we're comfortable with

and we very much wanna protect our relationship. That matters above all things and you give up so much control of your life and you are expected to talk about these things. And I think with some of these ladies, they're just like, you know, yeah, Kyle, she's been there the whole time. She's the OG. She, she is Beverly Hills housewives.

You know, when some of them else are kind of forced to talk about things they don't want to, it would be frustrating to be like, well, come on, Kyle, like, can we just get to the bottom of this thing that's not even that deep and you're kind of putting it in our faces, but we're not allowed to talk about it, but I gotta talk about like why my son or kid or my husband or partner or what, rumors or, you know,

it's just like, they always have to address these rumors. And a lot of them aren't true. But to Erika's point, she was like, Garcelle keeps coming at Kyle for this Morgan weight of it all and it's like, we know nothing about who Garcelle's fucking. It's like, Garcelle just like will not let this Morgan, she was standing on the side of a stage and Morgan's,

and Garcelle's like, and what was that all about? You went to a concert? Yeah, that is strange. It seems like she just went to a concert. It wasn't like a picture of them canoodling. I mean, I guess that also at the same time, you can't have a show just be like, everything's pretty good.

We've done a lot of work on ourselves. Feeling healthy? If they are, if there is some kind of secret romance, it's a very attractive couple. I have wound it up on Morgan Wade TikTok. Oh yes. Where it's just people at her concerts and she does Jessie's Girl.

She does a rendition of that song and I contemplate my sexuality while watching. And I understand where Kyle comes from. It all makes sense. She's so cool. Yeah, she's very cool. Yeah, yeah, there's something very like, very appealing. I get it, I get it Kyle. I also just like what she unlocks in Kyle.

Like Kyle is having so much fun with her and like feeling, I don't know, just feeling, I don't know. I can't even, who knows what they're doing. She's getting the tattoos. It's like fun and like life-affirming and sweet and leave Kyle alone, it's her private sweet and leave Kyle alone. It's her private life. Leave Kyle alone.

Yeah. So I was asking before we started recording, you guys have not jumped into Temptation Island yet. No, not yet. No. Is that something we could interest you in? If, or is like, is that too kind of smutty? No, we've gone pretty low.

Yeah, I mean, we watch Too Hot to Handle. Oh, yeah, this is... Well, then you need to watch Temptation on that. Because this is like that on... Steroids. Steroids. It's crazy. It's four couples who come in.

Some of them, one has been together for three and a half years. I think the one is like a year or so, it's in between. It's like 20s, early 30s. Yeah, later 20s, early 30s. Okay. Yeah, later 20s, early 30s. So it's a more of a younger cast. Right. Not like my four children and I.

Yeah. Just thought we'd go on this show. So those are the four couples at the top. At the top, okay. And then they sit together as couples as all of the women, the temptresses walk by. And then they sit there as a couple as the tempters walk by.

And then they get to the temptresses and tempters choose the person that they're interested in. So in front of your partner, this beautiful woman in a bikini walks up and puts a bracelet on Nick and is like, I'm so glad you're here. And you just like watch it. And then they go and move into a house. Oh, these.

Well, we love the ultimatum. Oh yeah. So yeah, there's hidden cameras everywhere. It's very much like we have boundaries of like, we will not cross a physical line. And then they're like having shower sex. The next scene was one of these. and then they're like having shower sex the next scene was one of these two. And then the women go to a bonfire

and they watch clips of what their boyfriend has been doing. Oh no. Or girlfriend. But usually as you might suspect that the two different islands have two very different vibes. Yeah. Like it's on the man's island with the women temperatures, it's party island.

Yeah, it's whipped cream, it's bikinis. And then on the women's side, it's party island. Yeah, it's whipped cream, it's bikinis. And then on the women's side, it's like a therapy session of all the girls just kind of talking to all these guys about their boyfriends and kind of like, you know, he just doesn't listen, you know, like the way I want him to. And he just doesn't stop having sex

with these temptresses. And then like people like Tyler, you know, when the temptresses were coming out, what did he say? Like in front of his girlfriend. He was like, oh, that one and that bikini's insane. What? Like crazy stuff.

So are the tempters and temptresses just looking to mess up a relationship or are they singles looking to be with someone? So yeah, they give them like confessionals. They allow you to like get to know these. They humanize them in a good way. In a way that makes it. So they're not just there to be like,

let me see if I can. No, they're like, listen, I wanna like potentially build a relationship with you. Maybe we could leave this island together and like not your girlfriend of four years, but me that you've known for two weeks. And so yeah, they're all kind of. And then there's others who are like.

I just want to mess stuff up. Yeah. I just want to see the world burn. No one really says that, but they're. Breon, his kind of story, his partner Shantae, she's lovely, calm, seems so down to earth and just, I guess right reasons is not to steal anything from the badger.

And he is just like, I'm paraphrasing, but he's like, my dick needs to have sex. It's not me. Oh. This is a, this is a. He's just like, I. I want nothing to do with it. Yeah, I'm on your side.

The way God made me, I need to take care of my guy, you know, like that's kind of how he talks. Shortly in, he has a threesome in a shower. Right after, he's like, yeah, didn't regret that. He basically is if he went to check off a box. And this Breon guy, and then there's this Grant guy, they clearly have never had good role models, I don't think.

And they seem to be very emotionally stunted and immature where Grant also had sex with someone. And then his confessional decided to forgive his girlfriend for I'm not sure what. He's like, I forgive you, you know? And he's talking, he's like, I'm not a bad guy. I just like, as if like the sex they're having on Temptation Island is like something they owe

to themselves and they don't regret it. And it's just the way these guys talk through their bullshit. It's, it's, it's, it's like a microscope into that age of man's brain. Yeah. Like how it works. And you're like this. In 2025, like hookup culture. Yeah.

Yeah. It's just like. This is crazy. Like you've been with this girl for two and a half years. You've been away from her for two and a half years. You've been away from her for four nights. And like you're already having sex with someone else. And then you're like, listen, I'm not really sorry,

but like I forgive you for all of our like past issues that we've ever had. And like, I love you. Basically for not accepting him for who he is. It's why it's happening. I mean, a man who just simply loves sex. And like, that's all, just what's so bad about that? I do feel like some people in this world

have to learn life lessons by going on a reality show and having the internet go, no, that's not. Yeah, not normal. Yeah. Like, sometimes, and maybe sometimes that doesn't even work, but yeah, I think you would have to look at yourself as like universally there was like one response. Wasn't like, oh, there was like split.

Like everyone's like, this is not a thing. And what's so crazy is that Breon, one of the temptresses that he's like kept, they kind of like send some of them home, you know, the ones that they're not really connecting with, they send some home. And you can keep multiple temperatures. Yes, okay.

So like after a few days, I'm not sure what the timeline is, the host, Mark Wahlberg, he's great, named also Mark Wahlberg. Oh, not Mark. Not the Mark Wahlberg, but he's. The other Mark. So Temptation Island actually has been, season one, I watched when I was a sophomore in college

in 2001. It's been around, oh wow. It was on Fox and it's jumped around from, I think it was on USA, it was on Peacock for a minute. Now Netflix has it, which is I think a really good thing. But he's the same host from like years ago. But he, unlike say like a Chris Harrison or a Jesse Palmer, no disrespect to them and maybe the show

doesn't ask him to do that. We love Jesse Palmer. Love Jesse Palmer, no disrespect to them, and maybe the show doesn't ask him. We love Jesse Palmer. Love Jesse Palmer, but every once in a while, Jesse comes out and, I don't know if you guys remember, did you watch Clayton's season when he was like, I love you all, and Jesse comes out, he's like, oh, good luck, you know? He's just like, the bachelor will come out and just go, I don't, I'm really in a lot of trouble here,

and Jesse's like, yeah, you sure are. I'm excited to see what you do. Yeah, see ya. And Mark is very much like giving real genuine advice. Oh wow, that's interesting. Like real thoughtful. And it's just weird because it's this kind of smutty show where they're doing threesome

and then these fireside chats, Mark's like, so wow, that's like some real deep childhood stuff going on here. Wow. And you're like, wait, what's wrong with my watching? That's like the Jerry Springer effect going on here. And then you're like, wait, wait, what's wrong with that? That's like the Jerry Springer effect. I remember I used to like watch that show and just be like, oh, and then at the end, he'd be like, you know what, guys, listen, be kind to each other.

And you're like, you always had like a Jerry's final thoughts. And they were like pretty profound. Most of the time, what did that Jerry through? You know? Yeah, yeah, exactly. You didn't stop any of those fights, but you're right, Jerry. Let me ask you guys a question. If someone said to someone,

well, maybe you said to your wife, you're just like, there's only one Jason, and there's only one Melanie. Would you find, what would that mean to you? Like if, in the context of? Like you've been around a bunch of temptresses the whole time and like you wanna... You sent a video.

Oh, and you're like... Say I was on the other island and I get this video from Jason. And he goes, I just want you to know there's only one Jason and there's only one Melanie. So annoying. Thank you. So annoying.

Because they were like, wow, that's really romantic on that show. And I'm like, I don't even know what that means. I mean, also his name was Lino, and I don't know a lot of Lino. So yeah, I was like, oh, maybe it's a relatively one Lino. Probably a Lino. Yeah, yeah.

But her name is Alexa. That's pretty common. Meanie. Yeah. So, okay, I didn't understand. So you're talking about someone who talks about themselves in the third person, which is always a... I guess, but like, it just like was, he said it like it was so okay. I didn't understand so it's it's cuz it's so you're talking about someone who talks about themselves in the third person I guess just like was it he said it like it was so profound and I'm like well first I don't know. I mean I guess but huh, I go

But if so, I did you have sex with someone else or not like There's only one and when I did it wasn't as good as it is with you, you know And when I did, it wasn't as good as it is with you. You know, so. It's only one of you. It's only one of me. It is a crazy show and I feel like every, my jaw has just dropped the entire show because you're like, oh my God, these people,

how are you doing this? You're bootstrap. So if you guys are, you know, I know you guys have a lot of TV to catch up on. That does sound interesting. It does sound really interesting. Some of these shows. If you liked Ultimatum.

We do like the Ultimatum, but we like the Ultimatum because it's like,. Some of these shows. If you like the ultimatum. We do like the ultimatum, but we like the ultimatum because it's like, like some of these shows, people's like fixation on bodies. It's like, they don't know anything about people other than what they look like. And then people are like, oh, my type. Like that's not my type.

It's like, who has such a specific type? When you don't, don't you need to know things about people? I feel so scared for like the world sometimes. It's like the things that make you fall in love with the person, like people that I've been with, it's like all over the map. Like nobody looks like each other. It's so strange to have like a type, I think,

and stick to it so religiously. Well, they say it like right when they meet someone, they're like, you're just so my type. You're my type, and they're like, oh, thank you so much. It's like your blonde extensions and your big fake boobs are just really my type. But that's what it is, it's distilling people down to like not even just bodies, but like body parts,

parts of a body that you find appealing. And then the humanity is like stripped away. And of course, like men like that are gonna go on a show and be like, well, I get to fuck whoever I want because there are body parts that are appealing to me. And I'm used to these other body parts. And it's like this, I don't know, it just feels like the death of like empathy and feeling.

And I don't know if we want it to come. People get so like detailed on, it's like, well, my type is blue eyes. I know. So no green eyes at all. Yeah, even though you have green eyes, I'm finding you attractive. So it's like, what's happening?

Yeah, thanks for really listening to me and paying attention to what I said. But that's not mine. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Wow, we're really connecting, but different hair colors. So sorry. It's not gonna work for me. I'm just more of a.

So strange to me. And then you feel bad, because again, what was her name? Breanne's lady. Shante. Shante. She, again, she comes across as such like a. I'm just feeling for Shante. Well, she, oh my God, you're gonna feel,

if you watch it, because she just seems like such a good person. Yeah. And he seems like the exact opposite. Like, I mean, it's edited, so you know, you don't know. But what we're seeing of Breon is not great. And he lacks kind of any empathy for her and any kind of thought that his decisions will impact her whatsoever.

And it's just so hard to see her. But I have, you know, because I see this a lot in real life in dating culture, where it's like you see this person and you're like, they seem smart and put together and stuff aware and have everything else going in their life. And then you meet who they're dating. And they're just like, and they treat them terribly.

And then she'll say things like, but I just love them so much. And I'm like, what exactly about them do you love? Like, what about how, you know, I always love to ask people like, what do you love about how they make you feel? That when you ask people that question, their eyes go, that's like their brain breaks

because they never thought of it in those contexts about like, oh, how I feel. Oh, cause it's like, well, it sounds like you've been miserable for like, oh, how I, how I feel. Oh, all right. Cause it's like, well, it sounds like you've been miserable for like, I don't know, like a period of time, like maybe a year. And I'm like, well, what do you mean you love? Because like, it sounds like you're confused

and upset and hurt constantly, you know? But like it's, it's, you see that people struggle with that. They just like, they decide they love someone probably maybe early in their relationship or whatever. And then they just kind of, the love that they have seems more based off of just like time invested. Yeah, I mean, yeah, I think also sometimes like you can, you get to know somebody and you know their story and you know what, what trials and tribulations they came through

and then you make excuses for the behavior that comes from that. Cause you're like, Oh, but I know I see their little child, you know, like I see who, what's going on, but there's no expectation to have them grow or be better. You're just so you're not sort of seeing that daily you're getting this behavior towards you. Um, and I also think sometimes it's, it's easier to have a clear bad guy in the relationship. If you're both really trying, then you're both going to be the bad guy at different times and that's uncomfortable for

people. It's much easier for some people to go meet with their friends and complain. It's also a lot less scary to have your own negative self-belief reinforced back to you than it is to believe in your own goodness and worth. And people just fall into traps where they don't feel good about themselves. They're with someone who makes them feel worse. And it's just like a cycle. They're just like, well, this makes sense to me. This works with my brain because that's what I'm already telling myself. Right. Yeah. And they feel like also some people feel like, well, that's true. Anybody being nice to me is someone wanting something from me, but someone being mean to me, that's what I'm already telling myself. Right. Yeah. And they feel like also some people feel like, well, that's true. Anybody being nice to me is someone wanting something from me,

but someone being mean to me, that's real. I can count on that. Sure. You know, which is a sad. Yeah. Yeah. Well, you guys are also in some really cool and exciting shows. You obviously are in yellow mirror. And I'm on temptation island. Yeah. On the new season. Yeah, I didn't tell you.

She comes in at the last second. Yeah, she's the final Temptress. Oh wow, okay. The Temptress. Yeah, good luck, good luck guys. Yeah, she's crazy. Matlock's a lot of fun. Oh thanks, thanks.

It's just fun to see you out there and like blowing up and it's just, it's been fun to see you in, you know, out there and in like blowing up and it's just it's been great to see and then obviously yellow jackets is a huge hit. How many seasons now is it on? Three. Yeah, the third season is airing right now. How do you guys manage, you know, your busy lives, your love for watching TV together, working, you know, being two working parents, but also very, very family oriented.

How do you guys all make that work? Yeah, I mean, it's definitely, I think, we both want to make it work. And when we first got together, there's sort of an element of spontaneity that you can just sort of do like, oh, I have a job and it's over in this country. So I will, you know, yeah.

And it become, and you can even do that for the first couple of years with your child. But once they get into school, we had a sense that when our daughter started kindergarten that we wanted a little bit more stability and. Yeah, so Matlock has been such a gift because it films here. So when I was doing Yellow Jackets and Jason was filming,

I was going back and forth to Vancouver, and sometimes I'd go up and do a day and come back. You know? So it's a lot. I came back every time, every chance I got. And most of the older cast is doing that because a lot of us have kids. So there's not a lot of like hanging out together time.

It's nice when you do get to. How is Vancouver? Do you like filming in Vancouver? Yeah, it's really nice. Yeah. Yeah. We've never been. It's nice when you do get to. How's Vancouver? Do you like filming in Vancouver? Yeah, it's really nice. Yeah. Yeah. We've never been. Oh, nice.

A lot of great playgrounds. It's really good for kids. A lot of great kids stuff. Is it really rainy there? Yes. It is. Yeah. But I'm from New Zealand, so used to it.

Does your daughter have a New Zealand accent or an American accent? On some words. Really? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Definitely. I didn't notice it at first, but then all of a sudden, I heard you say something and I was like, oh my gosh, that's how cool.

Also, when you hear other little kids talk and they just fully have an American accent, she doesn't. Yeah. Yeah. She has a little accent. Oh, that's sweet. And she's also lived in so many different places since she was born. So she's so cool.

Especially like the sound like four, like four or something like that. She says it much more like. Yeah, four. Yeah. Oh, yeah. It's like I remember when my niece was, I don't know, three, maybe four, and she was, Peppa Pig was everywhere. Oh, cute.

And she had her British accent for a while, like copying Peppa Pig was everywhere. And she had her British accent for a while. Like, calling Peppa Pig, so. Getting to know you, Jason, it feels like you are a very involved father. Like, you guys seem like very much like a team, and Nali and I very much try to emulate that and do that. Because what I've learned being a dad early on is that, especially for dads, and maybe even some parents, but like, I think there's a lot of people

who wanna have kids. Yeah. You know, and it's like, I wanna be a dad someday. But then I think there are people who like love being parents. Yeah. You know? And I feel very lucky, Natalie, I talked to us about this a lot,

that I feel very lucky that we're with two people who like, we love being parents. Yeah. And we love like, you know, sharing the responsibilities of raising her because And we love like, you know, sharing the responsibilities of raising her because like we like it, you know? And I feel very fortunate. I think we both feel very fortunate.

And I, you know, just from a very far, cause I don't know you guys that well, and I see interviews and your social medias, but you guys seem like you both together as a team, really enjoy being a family, being a team, being parents. It's just really fun and inspiring to see because like you don't see that all the time. And I know as a couple that very much tries to emulate that. It's it's really nice and fun to see.

I thank you. That's very nice. I I yeah, I feel very lucky. You can cry. No, yes. No, I cry all the time. I do cry all the time. I do cry all the time. No, I think it's, yeah, I mean, we talk about all the time how, you know, it's a lot of work and it's a lot of fun, but it's also a lot. And so, you know, you would want, the luckiest thing would be to be with someone who also

wants to be a parent as much as you do. Like that, it's such a... I can't imagine doing it with someone who's like, oh God, that's so annoying. Yeah, I never wanted something like that. You want me to bathe her tonight? Come on. Right, exactly. That kind of stuff. It's like a kind of this thing that's going around is like, you know, I'm so happy that I picked someone who wants to be a husband and a father versus someone who wants a wife and babies.

And it's such a time. Oh, right. Yeah, that's, yeah, exactly. There's definitely a difference. I never thought about it until I was a dad. Yeah, there's, yeah. You don't want someone, like if I was like, oh, you know, her daughter.

So bizarre. Sometimes like people will be like, oh, my husband's babysitting tonight. And it's like, he's not babysitting. Just with his kid. You're not paying him to do it. He's parenting like you would. You wouldn't say, I'm babysitting tonight.

It's interesting. It is funny to see the reactions to a single dad at the park versus like, you know, like. There's always like a, oh wow, you're here. Like, yeah, I sometimes I just take my daughter to the park. And then you see a mom like nursing a baby, pushing one in a stroller with like four dogs. And they're like, yeah, thank you, keep doing that.

And they like shut the door in front of her. I know, someone has to point out what she's doing wrong. Yeah, I have a celebrity friend who was talking about, they're also active parents, and when he takes their kids to school, he's treated like people are just like, oh my God. Yeah. You're here to drop off?

But when she brings to school, and they're a celebrity couple like you guys, and it's just like, oh, yeah, sure, mom brought the kids to school. Yeah, yeah, it's crazy. It's like the medical standard, and it's always kind couple like you guys. And it's just like, oh, yeah, sure. Mom brought the kids. It's like the credible standard. It's always kind of like this weird thing. That's, yeah. You need more people like us, Jason.

I know. Somebody said to me when someone was like, Jason does drop off a lot. And I was like, yeah. Why do we need to have a further conversation? Yeah. Yeah. I'm not like, I'm so grateful.

It's like, yeah. He does. He does his part. Yeah, I'm so grateful. It's like, yeah. He does his part. Yeah, I am so grateful. I know, you tell each other to be grateful for. Yeah, yeah. But like normalize. We did both sign up for this.

Yeah. So we are both doing just our part, you know. Yeah, it's just, you know, anyways, it's fun to have a happy party for you guys. I know. Healthy couples. I know. I just can't imagine doing it with somebody who's not as invested. It's fun to have a happy family for you guys. Healthy couples. I know. I just kind of imagine doing it with somebody

who's not as invested. I remember my mom, she was like, whenever I told her about Nick, she was like, I'm just so grateful that he has never been married or hasn't had children before, because she married my dad after he had three kids. And she was like, the first time I was pregnant,

I was like, oh my God, the baby kicked. And she would say my dad would be like, cool. Cause like he had been through it so many times. So like nothing was like as exciting as it was for her. And she was like, I'm so excited that you have someone who's just like equally on that. Yeah, go through it all together. After River was born,

her mom was very graciously there to help. And like the first couple of days she was looking, I just kept noticing her being like, because I was just like involved. He was like cleaning my breast pumps and would like get them charged. And she was just like, this is crazy. Yeah, I mean, yeah.

I'm like another generation. It's the worst job. 92 parts. Yeah. I got real good at it. I was also a very good swaddler. Oh yeah, I was a good swaddler too. I think some of the stuff that I like,

I know maybe it's just like, there's certain things where we can't do the way mom can. Right, of course. And I feel like all the things that I could do that like, you know, whether it's cleaning pumps or swaddling, it's like, I'm gonna dominate this task. I saw recently someone, this older guy, he said his kids were like in college now,

but he was like, one piece of advice I could give to parents with young children is like make everything a game. Like everything that you do, like you're sitting at a diner and you like do like blind taste tests of the syrup. Like you just like make everything that you do this just like fun game so that like they will, I think it was like not needing screens or whatever, but it was just like a fun way to think of like involving your kids and everything you do. Like instead of distracting them, you involve them and like you give them, you know, it's a cool. That is a cool. That still works on me.

How do you guys manage screen stuff? Because that is something that makes us, you know, we don't have to limit it, but she also I think I think the key is that like we talk about it with her and you know it's not just like She's not just sort of zoned out and also she still loves going Outside and going to the park and if there was ever a moment where it was like tantrum, cause I just need more iPad, then I would feel like, oh, we've gone too far. But we do other things with her that are fun. So she wants to do the other things.

She wants to play, she wants to draw, she wants to do a puzzle, she wants to go somewhere. So it's, I think you have to give them other options. Otherwise, of course they're gonna want to be. Natalie taught me how to be excited about everything. Now, River, anything new we present, she goes, oh, oh, because we just started doing that to anything new. We're like, wow.

And now she just mimics anything. Yeah, she goes, oh, it's so sweet. Oh, well, we know you guys have to get going and we thank you for your time. It was just fun to catch up with you guys. Yeah, yeah, it's so fun. Hear about you, what's up with you guys and all your fun projects.

Anything you guys wanna plug before we let you go? Yellow Jackets is coming out every Friday with new episodes, I think, unless there's a break. I don't think, I think so, I don't know. Yes, Friday. Fridays,'t think so. I don't know. Yes, Friday. Fridays, yeah. Fridays. Right?

Yeah. And then Matlock is on Thursdays, but not these next two Thursdays. There's three episodes left starting on April 3rd. And it's like, they're three really great ones. Anytime I was homesick growing up, I was like hoping a Matlock episode was on. That's awesome.

Back in the day. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So nostalgic to see it back on. It's so good. It's such a good show. It's so much fun. I'm having a great time. It's great, man.

Well, congratulations to all your guys' success and it's great to catch up with you guys and thanks for coming on. Thanks for having us. Thanks for having us. So nice. Being on the go and wanting to stay healthy are hard things to maintain,

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Go to beekeepersnaturals.com slash viall or enter code viall to get 20% off your order. That's B-E-E-K-E-E-P-E-R-S-N-A-T-U-R-A-L-S.com slash VIALL or enter code VIALL. I just love Jason and Melanie. I've always been a big fan of Jason's. I mean, for those of you guys don't know, like Jason's dad, like a legend.

Through his company? Yeah. Which I actually saw John Ritter, for those of you guys who don't know, sadly passed away many years ago. And yeah, so, and then Jason, you know, has been in the biz for a while and it's been fun to see him become more and more successful.

Obviously we know Melanie has been in so many things. I feel like every time, I feel like anytime you turn on a movie or a TV show, it's like, oh my God, there's Melanie Lutsky. I was like, she's in just everything. Oh, she's a great character, actually. I always forget she has an accent, because she's so good, that it's just like,

oh yeah, you're not from here, are you? That's what I said to her. No, it's wild. I hope they do watch Temptation Island. I'm like so sad. I only have like two episodes left. How would you feel, I know you've been in love for a while, but let's say you had some random hookup sex

and then he called you cute afterwards. No, adorable. Adorable. Yeah, no. There's a lot of things that I must have done. And if adorable is it, like a pat on the head, like good job, babe. I don't ever want to hear the word adorable

and me associated in the same sentence. Who said this? Grant, whenever he wrote his letter to Natalie, he was like, you're so cute and adorable. And it was like, we were just fucking in the shower like last night and now I'm adorable. Well, because Tyler also said dear and I think about that pretty often.

I'm like, what is the language we're using here? He, well, times have changed. Well, he also in his letter to Natalie said, I yearn for you. And so. Yeah, Grant wrote that. I guarantee you he wrote that and go, this is good. This is real good.

Ooh, I cringed a little nice. Yearn. He's like, what's a big word I could use? They like, pred and prejudice. He's like, I am Jane Austen. I am Mr. Dawsey. Yeah. Dear.

Like, Grant is a perfect example of tall privilege. Because the confidence that man has. Truly. And I'm just not sure where else he's getting that confidence other than the fact that he seems to be like six, three, six, four, you know? He's attractive too. You think?

They're all attractive, this cast. You think Grant is like? I think he's conventionally attractive, yeah. Okay. He seems like the type of guy that can go out and get what he wants. Yeah, exactly. He acts as if he's never been told no.

I don't think him and... They look like they haven't had no role models. Who? Him and who? Most of the guys. Okay. Well, because they're all just operating with such low character traits.

It's like, how have you never had someone be like, hey, that's actually not how you treat someone that you would say that you love. It was like the Brion explaining his, like, cheating, being like, well, this is what's happening here, but like, it's not real. And it's like, bro, you guys are going to leave together. And what you did here not only exist in real life, but it is filmed to replay to show how little you fucking cared. So it's just like the idea that you think that these are two separate ideas of like, oh, I can hook up in fantasy island.

I do wonder if there's like a part of them that maybe they talked about before where it was like, hey, if I can get it to happen where I can have a threesome, like. No way. You would think so, but her reaction to finding out. I think it obviously would be hard for anyone to watch, but I feel like the way that he was just talking about it so openly and he's like, listen, no, like I don't need to go in that tent.

Like I'm here to show everything. I don't need to hide anything. Like I'm here to be open and honest. It seemed very much like I know she's gonna forgive me. I don't regret that. This is what I can't, you know? No, but that's what I find so sad about that situation. I think there's a lot of relationships out there

where one person just knows, they just have to wear that other person out. You know, like Shantay, they did the video and they did the video and they had the fireside chat and she steps away. And it's like they both know they're gonna, I think they're gonna end up together. I think Shantae and Breanne leave together as a couple

because the energy they give is just like, he just, it's like he knows he's in the doghouse now, but he's not, he doesn't give a fuck. He's not worried at all about her saying, I'm done with you. It's like he's just not worried. And even her, she acts like she's hurt, she's upset, she can't believe he did this,

but there's really no like, I'm done with this. It's more like she steps away to figure out, how can I process this and get through it? And it's like you can tell there's like this unspoken understanding between them, which is what I think you're kind of referring to, but I don't think it's like a pact or an actual understanding.

It's like this unspoken thing where he just knows that he has all the power and control in this relationship. And so when he decides to have a threesome because he's never had one yet, and this is the perfect opportunity to do it he just doesn't give a fuck. I mean Grant I feel like that's the difference between Grant and Ashley is that she at least is kind of like fuck this guy you know like she she kind of came into temptation either being like right away being like he's too cocky

he's kind of a piece of shit whatever maybe he's followed through but his ability to just be like I love you and I'm I still like it's like now that he's kind of a piece of shit, whatever, maybe he's followed through. But his ability to just be like, I love you. And I'm, I still like, it's like now that he's had sex, he's like ready to love her again. Like he did her a favor. But because she didn't send a video back, he's ready to invest in Natalie. But if she would have sent a video back,

then like he probably still would have left with Ashley, but would have hooked up with Natalie a few more times before they left. I mean like the Grant and Bre Grant and Breanne, it is all about them. It is everything about their relationship is about how they feel about anything, and that's really all that matters. You know, like they, you know. Well, and that's what Amaya said whenever she was like,

I'm declining your date because you, like, the way you're operating is, I'm like not down for that. And I give her so much props for being able to be like, I know this is like technically my role here, but I'm not down with the way that you're treating her. Yeah, like I wish that Shantae kind of, especially seeing like another woman say that to your long-term partner, that's where it'd be like,

if she can't even do it in a week, what am I doing? Right. I think the only positive thing, Breanne thinks about women is that they're useful. For threesomes till the birds come. I think a lot of times we'll say things like, oh, he hates women or she hates men or whatever. And I think sometimes it's a little generalized

because maybe someone's fighting with a partner and they act mean, but he really, just the way he's treating the whole group, all the temptresses and his, it's just, it's very objectification. It's very like. The way he had that threesome and then like got in the bed, didn't say anything to him.

Like let him leave. Let him leave. And let one of them pick one out. Courtney, she had a threesome and she got booted early. Oh yeah. Oh, kicked her off the show. Yeah. It's like, and he goes, yeah, she's cool,

but you know, I'm good. And then whenever Amaya, before she declined the date, is like sitting on the bed with him and they're having that conversation, she's like, you know what, like I don't feel comfortable having this. And she like gets up and he's like, people are so fucking weird, man.

It's like, huh? He's weird. And she can still hear you. Yeah, and she like, what? When we're watching Shantae, she just looks like this is a good person, this is a cool person, like she's grounded. But he is on fucking Mars.

No, even after the threesome, he does his interview and he's like, well maybe we'll see if we can get Amaya and one of the other girls in bed next. Yeah, an angel. Yeah, and I was just like, you have no remorse, you do not feel bad. And then he sits there being like, okay, well now that it's time for me to probably get back

with my girlfriend, I just know I wanna be the man that she expects me to be. It's like. That is gross. I can't help but be kinda happy for Tyler and Kay. They're kind of adorable. You're not? I think Taylor,

I think Taylor has the potential of sometimes being a little Karen-ish. I didn't love the like, he has bitch tendencies and like I'll say that to his face, like I don't, I'll say that till the day I die or like whatever her little. You know what, and like watching Taylor, it reminded me just like how many,

I think how many ladies out there are looking for useful idiots. And I think if you're a lady out there dating a man, if you treat your guy or think of him as kind of a useful idiot, he's gonna eventually hate you. That's a recipe for resentment. And I think there's a difference between

giving your partner shit and fucking with each other, but when you start rolling your eyes and everything that comes out of their mouth is either stupid or dumb or why do you say that? And they're just essentially useful idiots to you. Everything they do annoys you. Yeah, and I think that like sitcoms, it's always like smart mom, useful idiot husband.

And I think a lot of our, on a quite an honest, these sitcoms we grew up on were kind of gave that vibe. And I think that's, there's a lot of relationships out there where like the man in the relationship is thought of as kind of a useful idiot. And that is like a number one way, I promise you ladies, that your husband's gonna hate you if he doesn't already.

It's kind of the same way if like the other way around. If you treat your, you know, for the men, if you treat your spouse as like just like a constant, you know, nag or whatever. Resentment is probably the number one thing that leads to an end of a relationship. And just like, yeah, like Taylor just seems to, Tyler obviously has his flaws and like,

I do think he's very inexperienced. He comes across as someone who really blossomed in his 20s. Well, he said he had only had one relationship prior to Taylor, right? And it was like the long, yeah. No, he got married, he got married as a teenager and then met Taylor to basically get out of that marriage and so here's a guy who's kinda really

hasn't lived some real life. So I kinda cut him a little slack. I think Tyler is a good soul. Not perfect, and definitely maybe he does or says things he shouldn't say, but he seems like a good one. It is hard though to watch these couples crack in just days.

It's like, come on. I will give Kay credit though that I was like, the whole, I'm just gonna make him take me to his room so then he can start envisioning me in his room or in something, and I was like the whole, I'm just gonna make him take me to his room so then he can start envisioning me in his room or something. And I was like, that is some psychology 101. You did the studies. Yeah. And it proved to work.

Well, something that excited me yesterday, I really had a craving for Taco Bell. So I ordered it last night. And I don't know if you are following Taylor, Frankie, Paul, but she posted a while back on TikTok that she goes to Taco Bell, gets a Baja blast, and then brings it home and makes it dirty by adding coffee creamer to it. Well, genius. That sounds insane.

It's so good, and they do it with a frozen slushy version of it. I had it last night. Mind blown. But she has a collaboration with Taco Bell, so it is like for her, and they gave her an award for that she has the menu hack of the year. And she received that over the weekend. And let me tell you, it was game changing for me.

I love the Baja Blast. How do I get a collaboration with Chick-fil-A? You kind of have to start posting your obsession with Chick-fil-A. Or like do your own, like, what do you add to yours? What do you take off? Like what's the sauce? What's the recipe? And then maybe get your own sandwich,

like get Natalie's way. Right. DM the brand. But they're kind of problematic. Yeah, 100%. Well. Yes, definitely. Yes, definitely.

Just want to point it out. They are. No, they are. I also think they're overrated chicken sandwiches, by the way, yes, definitely. Yes, definitely. Just want to point it out. They are. No, they are. I also think they're overrated chicken sandwiches, by the way, but that's just. I'm also convinced that Taco Bell is owned by Stoners because I'm like, everything that comes on their menu just makes me think that it's like somebody just sat there

and was like, what if we made a taco out of Doritos? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, it's just such high food. They'll put cheese on cheese. I don't eat Taco Bell, but I see those photos and I'm like, mm. You know what, we're gonna do a Mexican pizza, but then we'll do a Crunchwrap.

And what if we put the tortilla around the Mexican pizza? Crunchwrap Supreme. Crazy. Sorry, food first donors, buy stoners. That's true. Tell me I'm wrong. And I don't even like Taco Bell that much. So I don't have a problem.

Up next, we have a very hilarious comedian. Ari Shaffir is with us. He's got a new Netflix special out called America's Sweetheart. If you like some dark comedy and giggle about things that feel a little naughty, you are in for a treat. Cause that is what's up next. Oh my God. It's actually really long.

Your one sheet. Oh, God. It's actually really long. You're one sheet. Oh, yeah. It got me thinking. Yes. Wow. Yeah. I don't know.

You're talented. You've done so much in your life. How old are you? A hundred? Yeah. The question is what are you passionate about? It's like, oh. I got to say thank you by the way.

Like you really took the time. Good question. It wasn't meant to be homework. It was a good question. It got me thinking on the plane and I was like, oh. What am I passionate about? Should I give a shit about life? I was like, should I pull the rip cord in this plane and just get out of here?

All right, ready? Yeah. I kind of feel like we already started. That was funny. Yeah, what's one thing people don't think you guys are passionate about that you are? I'll start. Hi guys, I kind of feel like we already started. That was funny. Yeah. What's one thing people don't think you guys are passionate about that you are? I'll start.

Hi guys. Welcome to the Vilephiles. What is one thing that you're passionate about that people don't think that you are? No, no, no, I'm just asking you. Mine is people not walking on a sidewalk when there's a sidewalk to walk on. It's frustrating, the bikers especially,

when they have their own dedicated bike lane. Yeah. Ooh, I got one for you. Yeah. And it's specifically against comedians, not you specifically. I love it. Perfect.

Nobody hates comics more than comics. So, yeah. And I'm definitely more like, I kind of like that I feel like culturally, not to trigger anyone, I feel like we're allowed to be a little more funny these days. You know, you have some dark humor,

some raunchy humor. Almost all. Yeah, I quite enjoy it. Thanks. But like, listen, you know, comedy, it's an art form, you know? Yeah. And as I've been told by comics,

but every once in a while. Such a lead up, I wanna. Yeah, I'm like, oh my God. Every once in a while. They're too ugly. There might be people online or people in podcasts like maybe critiquing a comment or just being like, I didn't find that funny.

And then some comics will be like, you know I'm a comic, right? Babies, they're such babies. I don't give a, yeah, I know you're a comic. And I guess I didn't, first of all, didn't know that was a joke, sorry. And I guess I didn't know everything you say falls under the category of I'm fucking joking And they take themselves real too serious. Oh, they're such babies. I'll tell you like it's okay

I'll tell you I'm talking about after we get done recording. Okay. Yeah, okay. That's smart You know, that's my favorite person ever. Yeah, we already triggered them So you know where comics fucked up is that they said like, we're just joking, we're just joking. And then they got super serious and political. And then the audience like, well, how do I know when you are joking? Literally. What? Yeah.

And then it's always like, and if they ever get it like criticism, it's, but I'm a comic. Yeah. It's like, okay. I prefer it like in a live show where somebody leaves, and you're like, you suck. And they leave and you just kind of watch them go,

I mean, they're not wrong. Anyway, let's get back to it. Yeah. Yeah. It's like, I mean, they're not wrong. Anyway, let's get back to it. Yeah. Yeah. It's like, I mean, your opinion's fine. You're right. In the way that some celebrities hold on to their humanity

and how most lose it. Like, and you can give an example, Chapel Rowan telling fans that they need to leave her alone at the supermarket versus Taylor Swift breaking up with her boyfriend because dumb fans got worked up over a joke. You remember that one? Someone else's fake stage name.

I don't remember the Taylor Swift one. Taylor Swift was dating the guy from 1979. Oh, yes. And he made a joke on a podcast that's not around anymore, Mullen and Star Wars podcast about ice spice. And he was like, oh, is she like an Eskimo rapper? But she's not, she just called herself ice spice. And was like, oh, is she like an Eskimo rapper? But she's not. She's just called herself ice spice.

The internet was like, that's, um, I guess racially insensitive, but he's like, she's not, she's not that, like, I don't know, whatever. And then they went out and then just Taylor Swift was like, yeah, I'm all a product. So you're out. Yeah, you're out. I'll just date a different product. Yeah. To get bigger. Yeah. And it's like yeah immediately after yeah you love chapel ron being like I'm not yeah like leave me alone my work and you get me

when I'm on stage and you get my music and then like I'm a human like because she just got famous so she's like hasn't been removed from her humanity she went to zero to a million she got so like that yeah so she's still living in her head in that like I'm just a normal person world. Who wasn't recently, was it like Scarlett Johansson? I think maybe that's wrong, but was like I only take photos with fans in professional settings.

Like I will not take a photo with a fan if I'm just like getting a coffee. That's pretty good. Because I don't want people to know like where I am. Like it was like a, you don't deserve. I get it. Like Billie Eilish still lives at home with her parents in the, like it was like a, you don't deserve to. I get it. Like Billie Eilish still lives at home with her parents in the house she grew up in.

Dork. Move out. Get an apartment at least, you can afford a one bedroom. If I can, you can. A studio. Yeah, get some cabinet space lady. Why don't, why aren't you watching reality TV? I feel like it would be really good like.

Cause I'll get hooked. It's good material. It the same reason. I don't do like fantasy football. All my time. I watched one season of survivor and I was like, I couldn't turn it off. It was so, it's so hard. It's fine. I do like it. It's trash, but like it's fun trash. Like, it's like, uh, uh, Fast and Furious. So it this point. Are you America's sweetheart? I am, I'm the nicest guy in America. How did you come up with that title for your special? Because everybody hates me.

But I'm trying to get people to stay positive. Do you think everyone hates you? No, but I try to go dark. You do go dark? Yeah. I joke with some of those people, like what a terrible person. Did you get much heat for that COVID joke?

Which COVID one? Which one? You talked about everything has a terrible person. Did you get much heat for that COVID joke? Which COVID one? Which one? You talked about everything has a silver lining. Yeah. Like COVID. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And you're like some people died, but some of them are. Some of them were complete, yeah, some of them were fucking shitty people.

You know people, you know you wish death on some people 10 years ago and then they died in a new way. They weren't aware of,. So it's like great. I didn't imagine it that way, but I'll take it. Yeah, remember going outside during COVID and just like walking in the middle of Ventura and like no one's gonna come at you? It was like ghost town.

It was eerie, it was like that in New York too. And you're like, you take the best pictures. You literally stand in the middle of Fifth Avenue. Yeah, yeah, you don't take cars out, there's just no one there, it's pretty nice. Are you a part-time influencer? No. No. I was wondering why you're doing photo shoots in the middle of the street. Oh yeah. Just because you could, I guess. Yeah. It was like, this is a cool pic. Part-time influencer. Is that a thing? Part-time influencers. I

love it. Have you done any jokes about being a son of a Holocaust survivor or is that like way too far? Yeah. Yeah. Yeahons. How does, mother, father? Dad. Dad. Yeah, group of Romania. Thank God, it was pretty far east. Does he find them funny or? Yeah, he understands like the,

there's two ways to go about like dark jokes, taking them, it's either like this is awful or like, oh, they know it's awful, that's why it's funny, taking light of something. Right. If you make fun of like dropping your slice of pizza, it's just not that funny, because it's not that bad. But if you make fun of the Holocaust,

then it's like, oh, making light of that is like, it's such a, you know, so different than how you should react. So he gets it, he's like, you're actually showing how terrible it is. He's not at home crying because his son doesn't understand what he's been through. Yeah, the people who get upset at comedy jokes

is really, it's just because it's a new art form. So people don't quite know how to take it. And they're like, it's you speaking about your own feelings with your own name versus like a naked lady painting is like, we know by now that's not an actual naked lady. But then even like, I don't know when photography got big, people were like, this is smut. Remember that? And it was like, no, it's not. It's just like a black and white photo of it.

The naked dude with a nice dong. But like no one's actually coming for the dong. It's just like a black and white photo, but the naked dude with a nice dong. With a huge dick. But like no one's actually coming for the dong. It's for like the, you know, the lighting and stuff. It's in Sepia. It's a beautiful car. Yeah, Sepia dong, yeah. Sepia dong should be a name for someone's podcast.

Are you currently watching Sex in the City or the new one? The old one. Oh, thank God. And I am loving it. Okay. I assume you guys have seen it? Oh, yeah. Obviously.

It's the worst written show possibly of all time. I can forgive them for writing men terribly because it's not about the men on purpose. It's about these women and their friendships. But which one are you? I will tell you, I used to hate the redhead. And then I've realized finally after seeing the new ones. Well, I'm a Miranda.

You're a Miranda. Yeah, I'm starting to like her. Yeah. No, she's the only one who makes any fucking sense. She's the redhead. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And why does she make sense? Because she's not a fucking hypocrite.

She's not like, she's not like Carrie. Yeah. The worst friend. Worst friend! Worst in the world. The worst friend! Anytime somebody's like, oh my God, I'm having a terrible time, And she's just leafing.

She's like, I know, right? Somebody stood you up, just leafing through like letters. And like, anyway, so I'm out of cigarettes. Can you believe it? And he was like, no, this is your friend's moment. No, and she will bulldoze through anyone in the name of getting her way with Big. Oh my God.

And it's like, he's a bad guy. Yeah. Were you team Aiden or team Big? I mean, I think they both should have just murdered her. Also, the guy was like, you're just constantly starting fights with me. I see it from big side, but also like he's not the guy for you.

The first time she broke up with him, they were going on vacation and they're on the sidewalk and she like wants, I think, she wanted a commitment or something, and like two weeks of dating. Two way too early. He's taking her on a trip, and then she's like, well no, then that's not going. Two way too early. He's taking her on a trip and because he's,

and then she's like, well no, then I'm just not going. And it's like. And he's just like, what lady? I mean, her blow jobs must have been so epic for him to put up with that. And every time he comes over, he's like, we're late, let's go. And she's like, I'm getting ready,

I can't pick out which shoes I want. And then he lights up a cigar, which is like an hour and a half smoke. And I'm like, you're already late. This is a crazy, this doesn't make any sense. Definitely don't have time for that. Yeah, like what are you doing? She just shows up to where his parents are.

I'm like, this is out of line, lady. You can't be doing this. Did you watch the new one or no? It was pretty brutal. Once Big died, I was like, did right away. Spoiler alert. Immediately, the first episode is the Peloton death scene.

No, I mean, they really completed her, her, like, her being terrible in general, because she just watched him die. I didn't even. She's like, Oh, you're still. Okay. And that did rock me. I was like crying, I think for the rest of the day being like, you can't ever get on a Peloton.

Please, you're missing. Well, I am older than her. So it was immediately like, you know, trauma from like dating an older man. Uh-uh. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm sure you've been there. You must be like, yeah, okay, this could happen. Yeah.

Someday. And did you know that a new study just came out that? Apparently I'm six times more likely to have a heart attack. Marijuana smokers are six times more likely to have a heart attack. What? But we're chill. Not chill enough, clearly.

What? Oh, it's because we run out of weed, we get real upset. Yeah, and you get like bad anxiety. smokers are six times more likely to have heart attack. What? But we're chill. Not chill enough, clearly. What? Oh, it's because we run out of weed, we get real upset. You get, yeah, and you get like bad anxiety and you get like itchy. Six times more likely. Six times.

But I said, more than what? That's hard to believe. More than what? The average person. What is the average? Because I said zero times six is still zero. Damn, that's good math. But it is at the end of the day, just math.

And doesn't make any sense in the story. Who's the zero? Six times more likely than someone who isn't already predisposed to cardiovascular events. Still don't know what that means? Yeah, what's cardiovascular? Does that even work? Sounds like you made it up.

It's fucking up the brain cells in your head. My grandfather and dad have had heart attacks. So yeah, so technically it's double. Oh my God. My father was a Holocaust survivor and almost none of them smoke weed and they didn't live long. So really, you live longer.

Get there, get there, get there. I'm there, I'm there. Okay. Oh my God. He wrote, we asked. Wait, wait, wait, wait. I just wanted Sex and the City. Okay.

Okay, she's a sex columnist in not the 1930s, in the 90s to 2000s, and she's like, a threesome, could I, what? In New York fucking city, she's the most prudish person in the goddamn world. She also has a very small column and a very nice apartment, control department. A brownstone at that.

Yeah. She's on a bus. She's on a bus. She's on a fucking bus. Yeah, she's popular. And she's the only one with short boobs, the whole show. That's separate, that's an actor thing, not the character. And that's the personal gripe you have. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, Samantha is, some could say too nude.

Yeah, no, no none could say that. No bad naked for you? You didn't watch that sign up for the episode? I mean, listen, girls had some bad nudity, but. The show girls? The show girls. Oh. Yeah, it was like, all right, Lena, chill.

We get it. Not every episode. You can do it once in a while, you're brave. Not every fucking episode. That's good. Tell me, tell her she was brave after the first season, and she's like, I'm gonna brave every eight minutes. Like, no one you're brave. Not every fucking episode. Tell me till she's brave after the first season and she's like, I'm going to brave every eight minutes. Like no one's just naked. I'm not that naked around my own apartment. No one's there. Put a robe on, do something.

Who cooks eggs with their fucking pussy out? Sorry, I'm getting too dirty for this podcast. I apologize. I'm a bad person you guys. That's crazy. Do you refer to a pussy as a bad person you guys. That's crazy. Do you refer to a pussy as a pussy? Almost never. Like if you're talking to like a girlfriend. When is the few times that you do? Just right here, it's come out of my mouth way more.

I usually call it a vagina. With a B? Yeah. Why the B? It makes it more stupid. Okay. Yeah. Yeah.

Do you want me to go down on your vagina? Bajina, yeah. I feel like most of the time the answer is no, don't you think? Yeah. Yeah. Do you want me to go down on your vagina? I feel like most of the time the answer is no, don't you think? Yeah, once you say vagina, they're like, grow up. But I'm like, oh my God. You're like deliberately trying to give them the ick so you don't have to. Yeah. You're a Red Wings fan?

Is that what that is? Who's Red Wings? Hockey team. What's that on your neck? Oh, it's because I lost my child. So I got a wing for it.? Oh, it's because I lost my child. So I got a wing for it. Fuck.

For my baby that I lost. Really? Yeah, you wanna dive in the batter? I got a matching one too. Really? You wanna unpack or? Nope. Sorry.

Nope, please. Anyway. That made everything else feel like a little less violating. Yeah, sometimes it gets too real. I'm like, I've lost the chance. All right, I'm out. It was fun to see you get a little awkward there. Are there moments when you're on stage and you,

can you see your audience or are you those, it's like turn the lights up right, I don't wanna see. Yeah, first couple rows you can see and then it just disappears. Do you look for their facial? Or is that necessary in your line of profession when you're dark? Nah, you can do it if you want,

but it's like, everyone's trying to do it now. It's kind of like hacky, I try to go the other way. So you don't wanna see their facial expressions. I'll see it, no, I wanna see if they have a good time. But he's just not, yeah. Well, it's not like, yeah, to Ari's point, it's like a bit now, it's like a thing that it's part of their act to do some crowd work. Yeah, everyone's like, it used to just something like, yeah, to Ari's point, it's like a bit now, it's like a thing, it's part of their act to do some crowd work.

Yeah, everyone's like, it used to just be like, when you got to it, it happened, it happened. So we dropped a tray of drinks, you're like, let's make fun of it, or somebody shows up in something weird. But yeah, I can see them. It's nice when you're having a good time, but sometimes you see like,

and you just keep going, yeah. I gave it up for some lady at the comedy store once. What? Oh, I said anytime I go to a comedy show, I try to sit in the back. So they can't fuck with you? I don't wanna be subject of a fear comedy. Yeah.

I just wanna enjoy. I saw some lady at the comedy store like this the whole time, some 55, 60 year old lady. She was like, like a snarling face, and just like, she was quiet the whole time. I kept looking at her. Her husband, her boyfriend, whatever was into it. And I kept doing it, didn't mention it, and then I was like, all right, I'm done. And then I was like, her, her husband, her boyfriend, whatever was into it. And I kept doing it, didn't mention it,

and then I was like, all right, I'm done. And then I was like, before I go though, hey lady, I just wanna give some props here. Like, you hated me, right? She goes, yeah. And I'm like, okay, fair. But you kept your mouth shut the whole time, you didn't disrupt the show,

and it's okay to have your tastes and likes and dislikes, but you handled it so well. Guys, let's give her a round of applause for handling it well with her distaste. And then she's like, yeah. But that's all we want. Let us all enjoy. Yeah.

I appreciate it. I love how you didn't feel the need to remind her that it's an art and you're a comedian. And you didn't. That's okay to not like. Yeah, I like what you're saying. I'm not gonna be a baby about it. It's all right.

I get it. It's not for everybody. At what point did you realize you were funny? Like enough to do it in front of people? I don't know, fourth grade maybe? Never? Or, okay. Yeah, I was always getting thrown out of class.

Oh, you were always, I was like, he's talking too much. Yeah, I was like, annoying. Did you ever have to take tests outside? Like I was, my teacher would have to put desks outside of the door, and you'd have to take a test out there so that you didn't like disrupt you guys Jewish. Are you Jewish? 9% 9% Jewish. Well, if you were over 50%, um,

what you do is you just pay a doctor to say your child is learning disabled. And then you could take untimed tests at home and get better grades. So did she. Yep. Do whatever we want to get ahead. I got extra time for sure. I could use extra time. I'm just, I can't fucking read. Yeah, that would have helped then the extra time. Yeah.

Juice? No, it's juice. Oh. Juice. Oh, okay. I feel like, what is this accent? What is this word? Yeah, Jews got untimed tests, it's great.

There's white privilege and then there's another thing that we don't like to talk about. Jewish privilege. It is. L.A. what's so funny? She knows it. She got all the same privileges. What school did you go to?

It's called Shalhavet. Oh, that's it. Very Jewish. Very Jewish. No, I'm talking about college. Oh, USC. USC? U of SC? University of Southern California. Southern California. Is that how you guys say it? USC. Oh, USC, talking about college. Oh USC USC you of SC University of Southern California Southern California

So how you gonna say it? Oh USC? Yeah. Well, he went to yes, so I went to Shiva briefly Shiva. Yeah, that's nice Yeah on time tests. It's great. What a privilege. Did you feel? You can say anything That's my child I've had some on purposes You can say anything. Good. Can I ask you a question? Can I ask you a question about my child? I'll take it back. Yeah. Have you ever? I've had some unpurposes. Unpurposes. You don't get a tattoo for the unpurposes.

You just give a heart a handshake and get her a cigarette to make sure. Get that. And then you can go on your way. That's crazy. Beyond purpose. Thank God for the liberal laws in America. Why are you watching animal attack videos? Do you want to talk about that?

My algorithm got me. Or the ski videos. Yeah. You ever catch your algorithm just grabs you and takes you to a place? Yeah. Yeah. And sometimes it's a really strange place that you end up on. Yeah.

Yeah. I went from, there was like a doc that in like Santa Clarita that like caved like a couple months ago, it just like washed away and some guy was on it, but it stayed intact and they had to like rescue them. I was like, oh weird. And then from then on, it just went natural disasters. Like, it was like, oh, you must love that disasters. And then it pulled that into animal like disasters. I was just watching puppy videos and like, what about, it went wrong. And I like, oh, and then it's that into animal disasters. I was just watching puppy videos and like,

what about, it went wrong. And I like, oh. And then it's like, okay, fine. You don't like the puppies getting killed, but how about lions attacking tigers? And you're like, okay. You just click on it once and then it's all it takes you. Now every time I'm on a hike, I'm so fearful.

Like I hear squirrels, it's like, oh, it's a bobcat, I'm being tailed. Well, that's cause it says here that you do drugs while you hike. I do dos, it's like, ah, it's a bobcat. I'm being tailed. Well, that's cause it says here that you do drugs while you hike. I do do drugs. Yeah. So maybe. That's accurate.

That sheet never lies. Yeah. I do do drugs. Maybe it's more the drugs than the TikTok algorithm in your head. Yeah, yeah. I mean, I mean, yeah. You typed it in.

That's the heart attacks. That's the heart attacks. Smoking weed in nature. I get, oh, oh. Smoking weed in doomscrolling. Yeah. Weed's legal now. Is it really even a drug?

Is it even a drug? That's a valid question. Well, if we're gonna call weed a drug, I have no problem with that, but let's fucking call alcohol a drug. You have to call alcohol a drug, then. Well, we're not the only, there's also alcoholics that's drugs, too.

We're deflectors. Yeah, y'all are. Yeah, cause none of us go, it's not. We just go, that is too. Look at them. It's not my fault I'm a better person when I'm chilled out. More attentive to your child's needs.

Well, no. No, we actually were talking earlier in this episode how he leaves chewed up gum in random places, like on surfaces and our daughter will find it. And chew it? One time she did, one time it was wrapped all around her hand. She learned a valuable lesson that day.

That's what I said. What was that? Don't smoke weed and chew gum. When she's older, she'll remember that lesson. Just like pop pop. She'll be like, get high, put it down, go wait, wait. Oh, core memory, I'm gonna throw that away. Yeah, that's true.

She's gonna make her father, she's gonna call you, not then, but later, and be like, dad, I never knew how much you were preparing me for life. Do you ever know, do you already know any mushroom parenters mushroom? What? Parenters. Like they're microdosing. Yeah.

Yeah. You do. I do know a few of them. Thoughts, feelings, concerns. I'm okay with it. As long as you do like little small amounts, but also like you can see why it's scary. Why? Because like I mean sometimes you're just gone. You're just like I'm out. And you're like you don't need your kids. One time Nali and I partook watched like 11 hours of Peaky Blinders while in our

hot tub and then Nali was doing somersaults in the pool. Yeah. And then passed out naked on our floor while our dog ate the steak that we left on the table that we didn't eat. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Before kids. Ha ha ha ha ha ha.

This is before children. Do PK and post-K is so different. Ha ha ha. Truly. And then you'll remember your PK lives. Ha ha ha. And you're like, who was that? Do you have kids?

No, no, but... None that you wanted. None that I wanted, yeah. I got it, yeah, a couple. On purpose. A couple on purposes. I just love that you said that with such conviction, like, yeah, pre-kids life before post-kids life is so different. And I was like, oh my God, he's so relatable.

Like he's just like, gosh, like what was your pre-kid life? Wait, I do have a question. You're a golfer? You were a golfer. I was a golfer. You're not good anymore or you stopped? I was never good. Oh.

I was also, I played golf at Yeshiva University. Yeah, I played golf there. I was, it was, we just needed people to play. So anyone who had a golf bag could be on the team. I played golf there. I was, it was, we just needed people to play. So anyone who had a golf bag could be on the team. And I was, I believe the worst athlete in NCAA sports that year.

Oh my God. You played golf? No. My dad was the 11th longest drive hitter in the world one year. Okay. So. I shot a 143 in competition.

I know I went off about golf to know that's not good. Yeah. That's not good. Yeah, you're gonna be around 70, just below 70. The other team was laughing, my own coach was laughing at me. You just kept, but you played through. I was on the team, yeah, I played through it. I mean, they had to keep supplying the balls.

I don't have the patience for golf. It's after like nine holes, I'm like, fuck this shit. I'm also a little too competitive, because I'm not, like, I'm good enough to never been taught golf that I can like hit it at seven hours straight. Great, yeah, fun. So I can keep up with like the average golfer,

but like when my golfing buddies. Get cereal. Yeah, and I'm just like, I don't know, guys, I don't give a fuck. You're also not a big drinker, which I feel like that just like goes hand in hand with golfing for 15 hours straight. It made golfing better when I stopped caring

about the rules and had a couple nips or just like got high and then be like, hey, I'm not feeling this hole. I'll just go with you guys. Where's that smart one? I can't even see the hole from here. My score doesn't matter. Just let's just. We're just having fun, right?

Yeah, we're just having fun. I'm gonna go on a little hike in the woods and meet you guys. Yeah, my friend's husband's a really big golfer and it's like they do like betting and all that stuff. And so like anytime my boyfriend goes with him, I'm like, you're not, not betting, you're gonna lose. You're gonna lose.

They're just literally stealing money from you at this point. Yeah. How did you end up, we're getting a job at the Arlington Cemetery. Yeah, I used to. You have a fixation with dead people? I do now.

I used to lay pipe. You're now. It's a lay pipe. You're at the cemetery. Yeah. I don't know. Somebody I knew, knew somebody's hiring. I was 16. My first job. That's your first shot.

Yeah. First time I like, what does one do? Lay pipe. You, I was a horticulturalist. You just got to like water. I watered the flowers around the tomb of the unknown soldier. I put out the eternal flame once. I forgot about that.

Yeah. That might be treasonous. Oh my God. Yeah. Generally had to pick up pipes like it would go like hand male to female and lay them down on these long fields and then like let them go and the sprinklers and then when they were done, like you did put them back in the truck and then take up the next field and lay them out but sometimes if you were good you got like wand duty and it was just a hose with a magic wand in

it went up and then kind of down so like that so you just want walk like you know watering the all the beautiful flowers outside I was in a cemetery is gorgeous and then I didn't screw it on tight enough and then the hope the magic wand came off just popped off, and this shoot of water just went straight up into the eternal flame. Like what did you do? It went out.

I mean, I was like, I'm gonna get hung. There's all these like tourists there, and they're kind of looking up. I can see them looking up what the word eternal means. Because they're like, out. What is it, maybe I got it wrong. And then there's, yeah, I was like, maybe I got it wrong. And then there's, yeah, I was like, I'm fucked. Did you like call your boss and be like, Hey.

There's this, there's a, I think there's like a little like, you know, pilot light and it went back on, but for like two minutes I was like, Oh, this is really bad. Yeah. That the Marines are there like walking right nearby too many non-soldier and yeah, but it was fun. We used to take naps in the open graves. It was cool in there. No one was in there yet. So it wasn't really, it wasn't really like rude to anybody. It was not a soldier. You were breaking it in. Breaking it in. Exactly. Making sure it's

comfortable for these heroes. Would you say that you would like to be buried or cremated? Okay? Good question for all of us by the way I say I say cremated and then given to certain parts to different people who might want different groups of my friends Would you feed it to your dog? I had never thought of it before but there have I until beginning beginning of this episode when I found out Leia, who just had a child. Well, no. No, did not feed ashes to my dog. But apparently it's a family tradition

in her husband's family that when their child's umbilical cord falls off, I don't know if you know this, as a parent, you have a baby and he ties it up. And then like a week later it dries up like a raisin and pops off and like a lot of parents later, Like just keep it or do something with it and Leia Feeds it to her dog really

Did you go for it? That's a good boy today? It's like a treat like a special treat was it I mean you can't do that. She only has one We had one kid, but Wow What I mean, I would, I take back the question I was gonna ask. What kind of dog? Yeah, what does it matter?

What does it matter? That doesn't have any, if, yeah. Any dog is eating. If this is a court case, you'd be like, irrelevant. You're like, yep. Your honor, irrelevant to the thing. It could be a Pomeranian or German Shepherd. None of that matters.

All of it is gonna eat that. And was it into it? Well, she ate it. You know, she probably didn't even taste it. It was just like, yeah. It was very crunchy. Oh, because it dried up? Can I just say boo on this?

Do you regret it now that we made you feel bad for it? A little bit, yeah. I should have kept it. That was a keepsake for sure. What about the placenta thing? Would the men eat the placenta? I was offered it. You were?

I immediately turned it down. I'm definitely not one of those dads who's like trying to enjoy the placenta. I was offered it. You were? Yeah, I immediately turned it down. I'm definitely not one of those dads who's like trying to enjoy the whole experience. I'm just letting me know when my kids here. It's really good for you. Oh, right, you wanna see that. I'm front and center, I'm holding her hand.

Front and center, you were not front and center. You didn't see it? No, no, I was behind, no. You were the complete opposite of front and center. But the doctor is like, hey, do you wanna help deliver the baby? I was like, you got this shit. You went to school. I'm good.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Why look at it? He was behind Natalie holding her hand. Okay. You got this babe. You're doing great.

Yeah. I was like, I don't, for what reason, for what reason to see it that way? He also refused to try my breast pump out before me, which I felt like. Pump your own to pump his breast. I was, I was nervous to use it. I was like, what if it hurts? You know, I was a little scared. I'd never used a breast pump before.

Yeah. So I was like, listen, could you test it out and just let me know if it's painful? And he refused. Agreed. Why? Why would you're gonna have to do it. You'll never have to do it. But don't you feel like as in a relationship, you should just go through things together?

When you must. If you're on vacation and it's raining, it's raining for both of you. But if you're off, I don't know, golfing with friends and it's raining, you don't call her and say, I need you to step outside. I need you to also get wet needlessly.

So you like, you don't want to feel the contractions. You don't want to be involved. going to punch you in the face. Cause like, I'll get a nurse to punch me every once in a while in the, in the dick so I can feel what it's like. No, I'm sorry. You're going through this, but you know, just walk around the block and whatever clothes you're on, that'll ruin your iPhone. So we connect somehow. This is a Carrie kind of test. Yeah.

Carrie would absolutely make big, try all the shit he doesn't need to. What a lunatic. And then she walks by his wedding. Oh, is this where your wedding was that time? I just was walking in New York. I just happened to go by, ugh by this lady. Oh my God. So you wouldn't want to be front and center.

You're not interested in being a part of it. I got an ingrown toenail taken out. And he's like, you want to watch it? I'm like, nope, no need to see this. I'm just looking around the room every other way. Yeah, you're trained. You got it. He's trained.

I was like, I'll get you back later. And I have. In what way? How have you gotten her back? I've done things for you and our child. Oh, for me, I thought you were talking about for our doctor. Oh yeah. Oh, our doctor?

No, I paid her. Yeah, that was a bit hefty hospital bill for sure. Yeah, she asked me if I wanted to help. I was like, do I get a discount for that? You know, like. Yeah, if I don't have enough money for the check, I have to wash dishes. Yeah. Do your job, doc. for that, you know, like, yeah, if I don't have enough money for the check, I have to wash dishes.

Do your job, doc. Sew it up. There was a video that went viral of a woman who was in the middle of giving birth and it's like the husband's filming, I guess, and all you can see is like, you can't see anything but like the tops of her knees and there's like a nurse on the other side of her. And you can hear the doctor going like,

okay, you're gonna tear. So I'm probably just gonna have to cut. And as soon as she says it, the doc, the nurse makes that face and it's on film. That's her first day. And they're like, why would the nurse make that face? Yeah, like you've never seen this before? Like I, the, the, the patient, the mom who's in labor is like, is that going to hurt?

And she looks over at the nurse and nurse like, Oh, I don't think so. She's like, I don't know. I have no idea. That's going to fuck you up. We're going to tear your vagina. It's going to for sure hurt. Did you do that?

You did the pushing one or the cutting one? Well, I don't think my mom thought that they like just cut everyone now a days. You know, it was like, that's normal. That's how they get the baby out is just to cut you right open. And I was like, no, no, no. So I see it on the middle. That's the C-section.

Yeah. Talking about like cutting your vagina to make it wider. To make it come out. So there's three kinds. Slicing, cutting and pushing. And scissoring. And scissoring. So, um, no, my mom was like, they're gonna like, they do it to everyone. It's just easier to get the baby out.

And I was like, no, no, nowadays you do perineal massages to lubricate the area in which, which is basically like a gooch massage. It's like the same logic as before you have anal. Yeah. Can you imagine like the 1920s doing anal with just some like spit for barbarians? No plugs. For K-wide. I thought you lost your anal virginity to me.

So I'm going to have to put in my 30 days. I'm learning too much on the show. Where is HR? Where is HR? I'm gonna be rocking in a shower later. No friends said we could talk about this stuff while we're podcasting. Listen, it's all a bit, it's all stand up No friends said we can talk about this stuff while we're podcasting.

Listen, it's all a bit, it's all stand up and none, all of this is a joke. How bad did it hurt? Which one? The anal or giving birth to the baby? Now both. I will now say both. You agree to say? Yeah, which one hurt worse?

The anal. Because you don't get a, you don't get a numbing. You don't get epidural for anal. Honestly, if I can get epidural for anal, I would get. Honestly, anal. You agree to say? Yeah, which one hurt worse? Anal. Because you don't get a numbing. You don't get epidural for anal. Honestly, if I could get epidural for anal, I would do it every day of my life. I heard anal described as like, you're trying to shit out a house.

Oh my God. If you could get epidurals, you would do anal every day. I would do anal every day. Yeah, honestly, the epidural was the best part about giving birth, other than meeting my child for the first time. Wow. Yeah. Honestly, the epidural was the best part about giving birth other than meeting my child for the first time. Wow.

Yeah. You should, you should try epidural for your next hike or live music festival. I a hundred percent will. Give me that Michael Jackson stuff. They basically give you this thing, right? It's like a large kneel on your back and then going forward, they give you a remote control.

It's like, imagine having a remote control for your drugs, whatever your drugs are. And, and it's's like you can push this button as much as you want, you can't OD because you're good. Just more or less higher or lower? There's a more button. You stop hitting it if you like. It won't let you OD. It won't let you OD. But the second I was like I think I feel my toes more. Yeah so at any point you can just make sure you're at maximum high. Yeah, is that what you're, you just always like, just keep doing this.

Yeah. I get her to sleep, just hit this for me. But wow. Yeah. Wow. Crazy. And then you couldn't feel it? Could you push out?

Yeah, all you feel is like pressure, but you don't feel any. So you just kinda like. I mean, they tell you, they're like, you're gonna push for 10 seconds. And so you just like hold a push for 10 seconds. And then they're like, we see your head. And it's like, wow, I guess I'm doing something.

We got very lucky with very little complication, with no complications. So, you know, not the same for everyone, but it was shockingly like, like it happened real fast, that part. Yeah. Oh, like push, push, push. She's out. And then out. Yeah.

Did it, did it make this noise? You know, there was so much going on in the room. I don't recall. If Nick would have been down there, he could have listened. Yeah, I'm with you. Why watch it? Why watch it?

But also, curiosity. I've watched someone else's. They gotta do like a strangers in a train situation. I've seen the sex ed videos back in the day. And I imagine like some, something like that. Do you just have to shave before? Honestly, I thought about that. I said, should I get like a wax or shave before?

And then I said, well, wax is painful. Like I don't need to go through that right now. I'm about to go through birth. What's the epidural though? If I can get the wax post. They should all have that. The Brazilian place should just have an epidural. While we're here, while you're, why you can't feel anything.

Call in your wax. Yeah. So then I was like, I guess I could shave. And then I was like, well, that feels like a lot of open wounds. Like, you know, what if I cut myself? And then like that just felt like it was little, so. I just gave her a jungle to fight through. Yeah, right.

Sometimes they shave it themselves. The nurses will be like, oh my God, we got to get in right. Sometimes they shave it themselves. The nurses will be like, oh my God, we gotta get in here. And they have a little disposable razor. Would you have done that out of a? Would you have shaved me? I think I did that.

No, I think I said no. I meant like, if she's like, I have to shave for this, can you please also shave your D? The hair? Yeah. No, your dick off. Meet you there.

Meet you there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Every once in a while I'm like, you're dick off. Meet you there. Yeah. Meet you there. Yeah. Every once in a while I'm like this is getting crazy. Like. Yeah, I'll do it once every couple of years. Same.

This is getting crazy. I'm like, I can't see anything down there. I should probably take control. Is that gum? Yeah. How long has that been there? They don't still make big red. Juicy fruit. Ari, this has been a ton of fun. It has been. You guys rule. I think you're my

favorite married couple. Oh my god I've been recording this for 14 minutes. Oh really? That's also a pet peeve how easy it is to accidentally record a voice note and accidentally send it to someone via text. Oh. No. I did it last night, I got off stage, record your sets on there, and then I got off, I thought I hit stop, and then I talked a lot of shit

about people with my friend, and then I was like, oh, I still need the whole file. So easy to send to your friend. Ari, it's so much fun. You have- It's a great title for a burk. Thank you, don't do it. Burk. Burk, thanks, thank you. I thought I could skate behind that. You don't wanna go a great title for a Burke. Thank you. Don't do it. Burke.

Thanks, thank you. I thought I could skate by on that. You don't wanna go. This makes you feel good, you wanna say. Little texture eggs, happy birthday. Solid advice. The next Flip special is America, Sweetheart. It's out right now.

It's very funny if you want to laugh about things that make you feel like maybe you should or shouldn't laugh about it, but it's also really also funny and it is just comedy. So it's okay. Check it out. Thanks buddy. I feel like anytime we have a comedian, I just open up way too much. I learned a lot. You could say that the segment was educational. I feel like with Heather McMahon, I opened up about like things

I definitely shouldn't have. It's like, we just, hmm. Well, what do they say? Like, you know, usually comedy stems from like dark childhood trauma. Yeah, there's that whole, it's, well, it's that whole thing that's like why I'm funny is because X, Y, and Z happened to me. You know, it's like, this is- Learn to laugh or else I cry.

All I could think is crowd work is afraid of Natalie cause she banters. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Well, we just want to thank our guests, Jason and Melanie, as well as Ari for joining us. Be sure to follow them and check out

their work as well. Oh, and if you haven't already, be sure to check out the Barbie for a going deeper episode that dropped yesterday. It's a really great one, especially for all you euphoria fans. She's got a really excellent new movie called Bob Trevino.

Likes it. Be sure to check that out as well next week We got the bachelor finale and we will be interviewing your runner-up Which I think will be juicy I think maybe this finale might be worth you guys tuning into that will be with us when next Wednesday for going deeper and Obviously we will talk about the finale a little bit next Wednesday for going deeper. And obviously we will talk about the finale a little bit. Tuesday's recap, so much more coming ahead.

Excited to bring it to you. We'll see you then, bye.