The Way I Heard It with Mike Rowe - 246: Best Preamble Ever!

Episode Date: April 12, 2022

Mike and Chuck go guestless to talk Australian DJs, Satan's pool, killing iguanas, and everything else that fills the squares on Mike's calendar.  

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It's quality you can feel and a true American success story that you can be proud to support. Use code Mike. Get 20% off your order at American-giant. com slash mic. American giant American made. American giant American made. I just said, let me start recording, and I thought we were going to talk about what we're going to do.

Is this it? Are we talking about it now? Well, we're certainly going to talk about it. I figured in the spirit of podcasting, we would also record it, put it up there, and then see what people think. That's the essence of what we've been doing. Then it seems to be working. I mean, you tell me it's working.

with your constant update with how many five-star reviews we have and what people are saying and how everybody reacts to every little thing that happens. Hi, folks. It's the way I heard it, by the way. What episode is it, Chuck? 246? All right. Did I say that with a question mark? You did. The look of wonder is absolutely tattooed on your face. Wonder and surprise. Shock and all. Curiosity. Smashed together with a measure of hope. Optimism. On we. Fatality. and resignation. That's what makes you sort of a producer. And that's what makes you a wordsmith. Oh, my God, man.

If you haven't pieced it together yet, we don't have a guest on this particular episode. We have a terrific guest lined up in just a couple of days, and I'm going to not tell you who that is, but what with the travel schedule and what with logistics being what they are and what with our commitments to the podcast gods, Chuck and I looked at the schedule and determined that something had to happen. So this seemed like a good time to do a state of the union, give folks an update on all things micro-work-in. And really, whatever else you want to do, Chuck, like I said,

I'm not going to say much on this one. I'm turning it over to you. Nothing from me. This is all you. I'm the clay. You're the potter. You hop in, whatever it seems. It's just I have hard time believing this.

that this is going to happen. But it's not. Anyway, let me just say that your schedule is just a mastery of, I almost cursed. I don't want to curse because, you know. It's a hobgoblin. It's a hobgoblin. It's like a bunch of squares. I mean, we had an internal meeting just to go over your calendar at Microworks.

There were visual aids employed. You know, there are all these squares and everything. They're jammed in and you can't even read half the stuff. and it's like, what is happening? And so I looked at that and I said, man, we got to get ahead of this nightmare because this guy is all over the place. You're going to be out of town more than you're in town. I mean, I think that's probably true of what happened pre-pandemic.

Wouldn't you say you were on the road, maybe 150, 200 days out of a year? Yeah. It was 200, but, well, towards the end of dirty jobs in 2012, we were going to stay. Not looking for an exact number here, just, you know, ballpark kind of thing. 220, 230 was not on your job. usual. But here's what's really funny, man. And you'll appreciate this. You remember all those years ago when I stopped by your place. Actually, this was when you were living in a proper house, all married and stuff back in the day. Oh, right. Back in that day, yeah. I had come back from a date with destiny.

Remember? Is that the Tony Robbins thing? Yes. Yes, I do remember. Yes. I went with our friend, the human calculator, who has been on this podcast. He was doing. a morning warm-up routine for the crowd, you know. And this crowd, by the way, these are a lot of very ambitious, very intelligent people who want to better their lives. And Tony Robbins would do whatever he did. I didn't know anything about Tony.

And I just went as Scott's guest. Because it was in a second. So Scott is the warm-up act for Tony Robbins for his show. Like it's a just for those who don't know in the business, they have people who come out, let's say you go to see a taping of. friends back in the day. There would be a stand-up comedian who would come out and keep the energy up because it oftentimes takes a long time to shoot one of these shows. And so you're telling me that

Scott Flansberg was like the warm-up act for Tony Robbins event. Yes. And I'm also telling people who don't know that Scott Flansberg, otherwise known as the human calculator, holds many Guinness world records for fastest mathematical calculations. He's also just a freak in a lot of different ways. He's wired differently than most people. Has his own calendar, for instance. Got his own calendar, got his own timeline, he's bringing zero back and so forth and so on. Yep. Anyhow, I had known him for a couple of years.

We had met in the middle of the night on QBC when I introduced him as Stan Freeberg, the abacus man, and we've been friends ever since. So he invites me to this date with destiny to get a load of some guy named Tony Robbins with a giant head and a giant face and huge teeth and massive thumbs and, and, and, just so much, so much enthusiasm and advice for living. And I'm very skeptical of all these things. But I sat in the audience and I actually retained a lot of what I learned. And one of the things we did at this date with Destiny was we really looked forward and we tried to make our best estimation of what our lives would be like when we got to 60. Just get a plan in place

and get real action items involved and measure your every day, weigh yourself every day, test yourself, right? Always, always, always, stay true north and see if you can get to the place where you want to be when you're 60. And this was a reflection that you did with Tony Robbins at a time when I'm guessing you were about 31, maybe? That's about right, yeah. I was fired for the final time from QVC when I was 30. I was 31, maybe 32, right on the verge going on that great walkabout with my friends who we, you know, did that crazy around the world thing. I'm just thinking of it because when I think about my calendar today, this is so funny.

I said, look, here's my goal. When I'm 45, I no longer want to work because I have to. When I'm 50, even if I can work, I don't want to. I want at that point in my life to be affirmatively. just completely immersed in the business of reading books, traveling the world, and just... A man of leisure, as they used to say. Yes, but not a complete layabout.

I knew I'd remain curious. I just didn't want to be in the thrall of anyone or anything. I wanted blank slates, no calendars, no X marks, nothing. I'm just sitting here listening to you described. the fact that four people had a meeting to try and make sense of my calendar. And the fact that my 60th birthday

came and went not two weeks ago and the fact that I was completely off in not just in the practical way that I thought my life would turn out, but spectacularly off. And also incorrect in the mental state that I thought I would be in at 60. I was wrong about everything, Chuck,

proving once again that Tony Robbins doesn't know what he's talking about. We're going to get him on the show to go over this. But let me just say, I find that really surprising, Mike, because I'm exactly where I plan to be. I said, when I am 58, going on 59, I am going to be sitting in the second bedroom of the house that I've purchased,

talking to my buddy Mike on a podcast that started as something completely different. So I don't know why you jacked it all up. I can't blame Tony Robbins for this. Well, look, I have long since course corrected and rethought everything I thought I knew back when I was 32. Remember, I had just been fired for the third time from a job I didn't want to have in the first place. And I was just embarking on my attempt to truly channel Travis McGee and become a freelancer in my chosen field. And so I came back from this date with destiny all fired up.

I mean, he really, you know me, I'm a skeptic. I don't listen to all that. Sure. But I saw these Jemokes walk across burning coal. I was just going to say, didn't you do that? Yeah, I did it. I kind of ran. Made high-pitched girly sounds as I buggyed.

Why would you? I was just full of the kind of certainty that you and I always talk about on this podcast. And in so many different ways, everything that's happened over the last few years, I've said it so many times, it just seems like we're so long uncertainty and so short on practicality and facts and reason, you know. And that was me, man. I knew exactly what I was going to do. I knew exactly how I was going to do it.

And flashing 30 years ahead, I'm so glad I was wrong. I'm so glad my calendar is a hot mess of ambiguity, disappointment, and confusion. I'm sorry that you have to deal with it. but I love the fact that we're able to still make sense of it, even if it requires us to sit down like this and do a podcast without a guest. I have absolutely no worry that the next 40 minutes or so are going to be every bit as captivating as that time we had that famous person on. Who shall remain nameless. Insert famous person name here.

Well, let's start with some of the things that are occupying the school. squares on your calendar. I mean, here's something you never thought you'd be doing at age 60, and that is more episodes of dirty jobs, am I right? My God. I didn't think that would be possible at age 58. Right. We had pulled the plug on production in 2012, and once again, man, there it was, that feeling of certainty and satisfaction. I did it. I got a show on the air that wasn't really a show. I paid an honest tribute to my pop. The show launched dozens of other programs. What were my goals? I said, I wanted to do 300 of these things before I pulled the pin. And more importantly, I wanted to film in all 50 states. And all of that happened in 2012.

And so Dirty Jobs came to its logical conclusion. I began a new chapter of stuff, took the foundation a lot more seriously than I ever had. And then COVID, and then essential work becomes headline news. And then everybody's saying, hey, dirty jobs. The crazy thing, Chuck, is, I mean, you've had a front row seat. You know, that show has been out of production since 2012. There are millions of people who think it's still in production. I mean, it is now.

But people who thought it never went away. Right. Because they aired it so many times. There's so many episodes and Discovery just kept airing it and airing it and airing it. Right? Yeah. And so suddenly, there it is again. The headlines catch up to you and your best attempts at certainty make a fool out of you. And there I am. We did six episodes last year and we've just started eight new episodes. And part of the reason the calendar is a hot mess is because I just spent a week or so down in Florida. Pile jacketing, soap recycling, and refurbishing a swimming pool

that if they have swimming pools in hell, I assure you this is the one old scratch is stretched out beside. Well, you were doing your best old scratch impersonation sitting there sipping the drink on the raft in the algae-filled pool. You posted that on Facebook last week, I guess, and that picture was just great.

Mary sent me that, and I was like, this is going to be a post. Yeah, it made the rounds. And you know what? Here's what really happened. This was the third job. out of the mix. This was down in West Palm. And we were at the end of the trip. We had a couple other things to do. That thing would stand together, which I'll tell you about later. We charted a

quick flight, flew to West Palm where my brother lives, who I haven't seen in ages. So Scott shows up on the shoot, which was so great to see him. But this pool, dude, it's a built-in concrete-based pool with a vinyl lining in it behind an old home. that has been abandoned for years, and the pool itself hadn't been tended to in 17 years. So on the surface was like a four-inch thick level of snot-green algae. And I mean snot-green. The first thing I thought of when I saw was that great quote from Joyce, the sea, the sea, the snot-green sea, the scrotum-tightening sea.

Right, right. And I look at this, I'm like, what in the heck are we going to do? So one dude shows up, one guy who has a pool cleaning service, and what he's going to do is make this thing as good as new. In six hours, he says. I mean, it's an impossible task. And I made it even more impossible by saying, look, this pool is so hideous. We can't just jump in and start cleaning it. We need to spend some time to shoot some promos for dirty jobs.

So I got this giant pink raft and somebody made a fake Pena Colada with a fancy straw. And I lie on the raft. get in the pool. And you can see things moving, you know, snakes maybe, frogs maybe, maybe an alligator. I don't know. And so there I am, 60 years old, lying on this giant floaty thing with the fake daughery doing promos for the show thinking, man, I don't know if it's going to end here today or not, but I'm glad I'm doing it. It all hurts, but I'm glad I'm doing it. And that post made the rounds and a lot of nice people said a lot of nice things. So let me just confirm it now. For the record, the show is back.

in production. Don't know one will be back on the air. Probably in the fall, but time will tell. And you're going to do how many episodes? How many more? Million. Big deal. Million more. That is a big deal. It's a multi-year contract for sure. We're going to do eight episodes, and the plan is to do, like we did last time, two jobs per episode. And I don't know if, you know, they don't typically err in the same order that we shoot them, that we'll be delivering them pretty quick, probably. So this will probably be one of the ones. And it's great. The guy who does it, Dan, he quickly realizes, you know, when you're

working with me, man, I show up to slow you down and cost you money. So he's trying to move lickety split, and I'm stopping him every couple seconds to ask him questions about everything. I'm making him crazy. So he calls a helper. Juan Carlos, I think his name was. This kid shows up, work circles around both of us. But still, you know, it's 85, 90 degrees. We're not getting done. We're dehydrated. The pool still looks like a giant saucer, a snot. So he calls his dad. His dad shows up who he had bought the company from.

This guy is awesome. His name's Dave. So suddenly it's me, the father, and the son. And Carlos, cleaning this pool. And it's just so miserable and just so much fun. And there's my brother standing there, shaking his head. Like, weren't you the guy who was going to be retired at 60? I'm like, shut up, Scott.

I'm busy. Do do do do do do do do. Is it weird to love people but despise human resources? If so, well, color me weird. It's not to say I don't respect the millions of people who work in HR departments and companies all over the country. I do. It's just that I don't envy him. That's why MicroWorks doesn't have an HR department for better or worse.

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ZipRecruiter.com slash row. ZipRecruiter.com slash row. The smartest way to hire. It was a great day. It was an awful day, and it's going to be a terrific segment. Did you get Scott into the action? Is Scott going to be part of the show? You know what? I mean, the cameras are always rolling on this gig, so he's in it. But, you know, he's got his own job down there. He's kind of a big deal in a big engineering company. And he just came by for like a half hour to have lunch, stayed the whole day. I don't know how he arranged it. But he just stayed the whole day. He was fascinated by it. I think he loves, like most brothers, you know, he likes to see me. in a certain level of distress.

Yeah. Yes, and discomfort, which I'm sure that day was full of. He's a smart guy, Scott. Smartest guy, I know. I mean, I realize our president said that about his son, and so you need to be careful with the way you sling around those kinds of certainties. But, yeah, my brother truly is.

He's got an enormous brain and such a weird sense of humor. He should have a show, honestly. Yeah. Yeah? He won't, but he should. Should we get Scott on here? Obviously, we're desperate for guests. Gullim.

We are not desperate for guests. I got plenty of guests lined up. I know. Plenty of guests. This is just one we're grabbing a little catch-up. Look, I wanted to do this around your birthday. Remember, when we did the Dave Ramsey thing, you were down here at my place, and the plan was, we were going to do Dave Ramsey in the morning, and then we were going to hop in my car and drive

to your house. and do a podcast in the car. But of course, my car is very loud. My car is just 15 years old. Your car is loud. I lost the microphones. Plus, it's like Thulman Louise, man. The two of us having a conversation like this at 75 miles an hour,

driving along the Pacific, you're going straight off the guardrail down the hill into the drink. I mean, if we were live podcasting, that would have been super exciting. But, you know, nobody's going to find the, final tape or anything. It just seemed ill-fated. So it's best that we're doing it like this. Well, it clearly was ill-fated because it didn't happen. So, hey, I got a question about, before we move on from Dirty Jobs to the other squares on your calendar. Oh, by the way, sorry.

I wanted to talk about pile jacketing, too, because this is the reason the swimming pool and the soap recycling, and the entirety of last week was so miserable. The very first job we do this year, You know, you've been to Florida. Yeah. A lot of water, which means a lot of bridges, like hundreds of thousands of bridges. Yeah. And not like the big bridges that get all the glamour and all the press. I mean, these little bridges, little roads that go over little canals back in the middle of nowhere.

Well, most of those bridges are supported by wooden pylons. And those pylons, many of them have been in the water now for 50 years. So they're rotting. So you can't tear the bridge down because there's a road. on it, right? You've got to somehow reinforce this thing. So we found a team of guys, they go to these old bridges, and they have these floating platforms in these crappy little backwater canals. And they stand on these platforms hammering giant nails into the wooden pylons. And then they get these big skeletons of rebar, and they hang them from the nails. And they hang them from the

nails all around the wooden pylon. And then you take the floaty thing back and then you put on deep water diving gear. And this diving bell that I wore weighed 35 pounds. And my neck was already jacked up because, you know, I'm old. And it just was impossible to walk around with this thing. But I had to walk around with it anyway. And then you dive to the bottom of the pylons and you move the rocks that have been there because the rebar needs to go down into the mud. And all day long with this giant thing on my head. They're pumping water. Not water.

What's the other thing? Air, the opposite of water. Air is what you need. Yeah, you don't want water inside the bell. So you're telling me that you're walking around on the bottom of the... Some canal. Some canal. Okay.

In a bell helmet. You know, they're pumping air in there. Yeah. And you're under water. You're doing that all day. So it's all feel. And all you hear is that... It's just...

I mean, it's horrifying. clostrophobic. Plus, my head, as you know, is larger than the average head. Enormous. So they have to, like, it takes two guys to put this thing on my head and my ears. They got to butter your ears on either side. They don't butter them. They just push them down. So my ears are folded over. They got this thing called a booger blaster that you jam from the outside into the holes of your nose. What? So if you have to clear a depth, right? You need to be able to pinch your nose to do that. But you can't do that in a diving bell because you can't get your thumb on your nose. Right. So if you have to pressurize, you have to take this booger blaster,

manipulate it from the outside of your mask, push it into the bottom of your nose, and then breathe out hard through your nose. That's how you, you know, equalize. Yeah, but hold on a second. How do you get it through the mask? I mean, the bell? The thing is on the inside and it's attached to a post. and you can grab a knob on the post that's on the outside of your belt in front of your face and then push it in and pull it out. And when you push it in, it slams into your nose. Okay, and when you pull it out, it gets out of your way.

But it's pitch black and there's no visibility and all you hear is... It really gets in your head, man. Anyhow, I couldn't breathe too well. I couldn't hear anything. I was in a lot of pain and I couldn't lift my head up. And we were in that posture for about six or seven hours. Oh, and by the way, after you get the rebar around the wooden pylon, then you take this fiberglass jacket, which is a thick piece of heavy-duty fiberglass that curls around, right?

Right. And you have to hammer that into place just so. So now you've got the fiberglass on the outside of the rebar, which is wrapped around the wooden pylon, and then the concrete guys come in. And now you're back on the platform blasting the concrete down through the hole in the top. So when you leave a wooden pylon that was maybe a foot in diameter is now a concrete support, which is about three feet in diameter. And that's why the bridges last forever. And that's the first dirty job you'll see in the fall.

And the reason why my calendar is not only busy, but why I am in such constant pain at the moment. It was a long week, Matt. I believe it. So the question that I was going to ask you about Dirty Jobs, you've done six episodes already that have aired, right? And I wondered, what was the one that irritated you the most? What was the one that you enjoyed the most? And what was the one that made you say, I'm too old for this shit? Yeah.

So the one that made me hurt was my fault because it's the one I wanted to go back to. do it was rod busting. Oh, yeah. It was the only construction job that I knew of that I hadn't tried. And every time I talked to an iron worker who was a fan of the show, they would always just chuckle and say, yeah, well, give us a call when you're ready to do a real job. Like, what are you talking about? Yeah, rod busting. There's rod busting and there's everything else. And so we did it. And so just carrying those 14-gauge rods back and forth all day long on your shoulder, it's miserable. because you're up on the top of a bridge and you're walking through grids of rebar

that's already been laid out. So it's like a game, right? You've got your big steel tip shoes and you've got to step in these foot-deep holes that are rimmed with rebar. So it's super easy to trip. And they've got five guys and you're carrying about 500 pounds of steel

on your shoulder. And if one guy trips and falls, everybody goes down like some horrible human centipede. it's just so heavy and it's just so hot and it's just so relentless and it's just so critical you know when you think about iron work and you think about rebar

you know the best thing about that job is not just that it was arduous and dirty it was great for the show it's that after they lay down these incredibly intricate skeletons of iron and they are artistic Chuck like when you're done and you look at

a bridge that's been just roughed out with rebar. It's just something out of a giant erector set. And it just looks so primal and beautiful. And it's really the very definition to me of an industrial art. And then the concrete guys come in, as they always do. And they cover it within a day. It's all completely covered and buried. So nobody ever sees what these guys do.

There would be no bridges and no roads without them. and so that was an important job to do and one that hurt almost as much as this one. The one I just described, pilejacketer, I think it was harder. You think pile jacketing was harder than rod busting? Yeah, it was for me, but only because, like, if I could do pile jacketing

without a 35-pound helmet nailed into my shoulders with a booger buster smashing my recently fixed nose, like all that, then. yeah, then maybe it'd be closer. But anyhow, I'd say rodbusting was the most classic one of the last bunch. The one I enjoyed the most? The one you enjoyed the most. And when I say enjoyed, I mean two things, two ways.

The one you enjoyed doing the most and the one that you enjoyed watching the most. Well, happily, sometimes, like when the two of those line up the same way, it's pretty interesting. Like, it was really, I'll get a lot of crap for this, but kill. Killing those iguanas was, I didn't really enjoy it because I'd rather not kill a thing if I'm not going to eat it. But they're real pests and they've created a giant problem down there. And so I love the idea that entire neighborhoods had been deputized. Like the mayor had said, you know what, it's okay to own a high-powered, gas-powered pellet rifle. In fact, we encourage you all to get one and patrol your neighborhood.

and kill these things because they're burrowing under houses, they're burrowing under highways, and they're causing a real problem. So look, it's Florida. So on the one hand, anything goes. But think about how bad a situation has to get before the elected officials say, all right, folks, here's what we're going to do. We're going to arm ourselves, and we're going to go on the hunt of all hunts. Florida man goes on hunt. Yeah, you know the headline. And they're not indigenous to the area, right? They were introduced from, I don't even know, where do they come from? Mostly exotic pet shops. Like this is how it always has. Like, did they start in the Caribbean and Africa? Yeah, they're from the island of iguana. You are, I just feel like you're making

some stuff up here right now. I don't know where they hail from, but I know they were brought here specifically for the exotic pet market. Right. This is the same beat, you know, how many other stories have we done? You know, it's the pythons that are now running amok, slithering amok in the Everglades. The scorpions. The scorpions. And trees, fauna too, not just, you know, flora fauna. It's the malorca trees, I think. We did those big controlled burns down there. The cane toads in Australia, they've waged a holy war on cane toads and field mice. I saw a video the other day of a farm in Australia, about maybe six acres in the shot, flat acres. As far as you could see in the shot, there were mice about a foot deep, hundreds of millions

of them, seething, crawling over each other. There's a plague of mice in parts of Australia. The cane toads are still running amok, and it always happens because either somebody wants a pet or somebody takes a shortcut, right? There was something in Florida, not Florida, in Hawaii. I think they brought the cane toads to Hawaii because something was eating the sugar cane. And so the cane toads were designed, you know, to eat the thing that was eating the sugar game. Yeah. But of course, nothing could eat the cane toad.

Right. Because they were poisonous. Nobody figured out. So when the snakes started eating the cantoes, they die of poison. So just unintended. consequences as far as you can see. And that's what happened with the iguanas. And that's why we were crawling on our belly through suburbs with high-powered pellet rifles shooting these things out of the trees. And I'll tell you something, man, in the old days, we would have probably cut that episode

together in a way that actually really reveled or at least acknowledged the totality of the carnage. But you just can't do that anymore. People's heads would explode. In much the same way, Juana's heads exploded when that little pellet. First of all, you have to shoot him in the eye if you're going to kill them in one shot, which is tough to do when you're on your belly 30 yards away. And so it was rough, and I didn't enjoy killing those things, but you know I love to shoot. And I'm a decent shot, so it was also weirdly enjoyable, but it was still hard to watch, especially when we turned them all into chum.

I'm sure the last thing to cross each of their minds was that pellet. Yeah, rough. Your squares are occupied with dirty jobs, but the truth of the matter is you have two other shows that are in production right now. Listen to you interviewing me. Like I'm actually on somebody else's podcast. This is fun. Mike, tell us, what was your dirtiest job? No, no, that's not that. I still, honestly, I still have PTSD from that. I mean, it's such a logical question. That's what everyone's. everybody would ask you. How would they not? How could you not ask that? I've told this story before, but since we're talking about it, I used to associate Australia

and Australians with really the epitome of a mix of charm and danger and individuality and exoticness. And then I went for a couple of visits, and I still felt that way. My friends down there were great, and I never had a bad time, and I just love the people. But then I went to shoot dirty jobs, which was also a delight, but then I went back to promote it. And what I learned was, you know, there were only 19 million people in Australia at the time. It was back in 2012. And to promote a show in Australia, you have to go everywhere.

I mean, like here, you can go to New York and L.A. and reach half the country, or most of the country, really. In Australia, to reach 18 million people, you have to hit every single radio show there is, and every TV show, there is. And suddenly, and you'll laugh as a VO guy, there's no difference between like Puk FM American Radio and Puk FM Australian radio.

You know, it's that over here is it, moving up a notch in the countdown, and it's the crazy, wacky morning zoo. Hello, everybody. Today's guest is Mike Rowe. Going to tell us all about a dirty job. Tell us, Mike, what was your dirtiest job ever and why? Right. That's what you hear in Chicago. What you hear in Melbourne is, so, Mike, you've done a lot of things out there.

You've seen a lot of crazy stuff. You've had your hands in some really off-putting places. But tell me something. And then I can see it, dude. I can see it in his face. This guy, it's just occurred to him. that he has the question of all questions. No one's ever asked this question before.

And he's so excited by it. And he leans in and he gets right on the mic the way those DJs do. And he says, so tell us, Mike, what was your deadiest job? And I don't know why it started to bother me so badly. It wasn't just the repetition of it. It was that look of, ah, aha.

Now we have a question. Buckle in. Here it comes. Strap in, mate. I'm going to hit you with something that Morley Safer himself would admire. Mike Wallace's hair would curl. And so what I realized was happening

is they were destroying the charm of the accent for me. And after answering that question in Australia, maybe two or three hundred times, I came back going, yeah, I don't care if I ever hear that accent again. Mike. M-O-I-K. Mike. What was your deadiest job? Anyhow. So yeah, what was your question? Well, I didn't get to it, really. We took a little bit of a detour, but you have three shows in production right now for three different networks. Can we talk about all of them? People should know. No, we didn't. Dirty jobs is bad. I'm saying can we? Can we talk about them? Is there anything that's awful? What else we're going to talk about? We don't have a guest. Are you kidding me? We're going to fill this so fast. We're not, we're not even. We're not even.

going to get through half the stuff that I want to get through. All right. Yeah. Because it takes you 10 minutes to say hello. And every story is a half hour. So, Mike. How many shows are you doing? How long does it take you to tell us about your dirtiest job? And don't lie, because I'll know if you are.

You really, that's... So there's dirty jobs, which is the most important. It's the most important, as you know, because it's been on every one. week for 20 years. It's Sympatico with our foundation. It's a tribute to my pop. And it's just such a kick to be putting it back out there. But how America works is also coming into its own. New season of that on April 25th and fans of that show, which let's face it, is really dirty jobs without a host, right? I mean, it's just an honest look like a fly on the wall of the most important industries in our country and some of the most controversial. Oil, beef, textiles,

aluminum. Law enforcement? Law enforcement is the kickoff this year. Yeah, man. I was so excited to do that show. And I'm really, this year's a little different. This year, I can't believe, I can't believe they agreed to this, but I'm doing raps on the show. I'm presenting each episode of the show. Topps and tails, we call him in the business, Mike. Topps. Topps and tails, Mike. Tell me, what was your dirtiest tale? No, they were so cool. This is a show on Fox Business. And it's going to be on Sunday nights, just like it was last season. And now each episode begins with me sitting right here, where I'm sitting right now introducing the show. And it's great. It reminds me of like the old Walt Disney shows where Walt would sit on the side of his desk and just introduce and present. the topic. And then at the end of each one, I kind of reflect back on what we just saw, and we tie it into MicroWorks, and we're going to build a page on MicroWorks that has all kinds of links

to all kinds of opportunities that are available in the industries that we feature on each episode of How America Works. I'm delighted by that, and I can't wait to see it back on the air. People love it. They told me it's the number one show on Fox Business, so I think we're going to do even more. We'll see. I don't know yet. Totally into it. Do do do do do do do do. The federal government is not going to close America's skills gap. They have an important role to play for sure, but if we're serious about reinvigorating the skilled trades on a national level, we need more organizations like Skills USA making a real difference on a local level. These guys have been around since 1965, and today they are relevant like never before with hundreds of chapters in schools all over the country.

and hundreds of thousands of students participating and competing every year. Nobody is doing more to train the next generation of skilled workers than Skills USA. And I'm encouraging you to at least consider being a part of this movement. Skills USA advisors and volunteers aren't just teaching trades. They're launching careers and strengthening the backbone of our country by mentoring the next generation of industry leaders. In high school, you could be among the people. people who are making this movement explode. Join the skilled trades movement. Support career and technical education programs through Skills USA. There's no better way to do it. You can volunteer

at a local chapter. You can start a chapter in your own town. Or you can just go to their website and see the impact for yourself and see too how easy it is to get involved. Thousands of kids are being introduced to the trades in a way that's absolutely positively moving the needle. The goal is a million members by 2030. I think it's doable. I'm doing what I can to help them. Learn more at skillsusa.org slash Mike. That's skillsusa.org slash Mike. I'm talking skills, skills, U.S. Skills, U.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.A. Mark Pierce was in the office yesterday. Was he? Yes, he was. Mark is the, what you call the proprietor of an excellent production company called Warm Springs. Warm Springs, Mike. Warm Springs, Mike. He's in Montana, and he doesn't fit

neatly into the Hollywood machine, which is why we get along so well. But he's been great to work with. The show looks great. Good guy. So yeah, there's Discovery. There's Fox Business. And then, and then there's one that's, this one is so, this is so unusual. It's called The Story Behind the Story. and it's going to premiere on TBN in, I want to say May 7th. That is correct. Yes. And the reason this is so unusual is that the stories that we're going behind or the stories that have aired on this podcast,

basically what happened is there's a guy named Matt Crouch. Matt runs Trinity Broadcasting. And I met Matt years ago when he called and said, my audience would so enjoy returning the favor. Is there any way we can license it from you? And I said, no, that's not possible. I don't own returning the favor. You can ask Facebook. He asked Facebook, and Facebook didn't want to license it.

So he said, this is a shame because my audience, I think they'd really like you, and they'd like to see you out in the world, meeting people and doing things. And I said, well, did you ever see somebody's got to do it? He said, no, I haven't. I said, well, it was on CNN for a while. He said, oh, yeah, I have a hard time imagining any show on CNN would be a good fit over here at TBN. And I said, well, don't be too sure. It was a lot like dirty jobs, only a little more focused on avocations instead of vocations,

passionate people doing things that they just love to do. So he looked at him and he liked it. And as you know, this is where you really began to impersonate a producer. You had to turn 30 hours, 32 hours of somebody's got to do it into 60 hours or 60 half hours for TV. 62 half hour shows. Yeah. Taylor and I, shout out to Taylor Wooten. Yeah.

62, 64, you know, I don't know. Well, they didn't take them all because, full disclosure, there are more than a few episodes of somebody's got to do it that weren't appropriate for TBN. Like when you were painting the bare breasts of women? Yes, I did do a show where we took a deep dive into body art and human billboards

that did require a fair amount of watercoloring on naked women, yeah. So, Mike. No question. No question. So what happened was this guy Matt, he gets his hands on somebody's got to do it and he loves it. And his audience loves it. And suddenly, I have a show every Saturday night on the largest Christian broadcasting station in the world. And the fact that this thing went from CNN to TBN. If I ever get the book done, there'll be a chapter in it about that. Yep. I mean, it's just almost impossible to believe, but for over four years, somebody's got to do it, has been airing on TBN, getting a great audience every Saturday night. Well, you can only run the same show for so long in the same place. So Matt came back again about a year ago and said, Mike. Because he's got an Australian accent. Suddenly. No, he said, hey, man, you know what else I really enjoy? I mean, I love the dirty jobs. I love so. somebody's got to do, and I love her turning the favor. But this podcast, the way I heard it, these short stories, I was listening to one the other day, he said, and I thought, I could bring

this to life, like really bring it to life, cinematically. And he went on to describe this whole notion whereby he would hire actors and directors and sets. And just in case you are new to the podcast, these are the stories that were the first 170 episodes before it became a long-form interview or chat. These were short stories, mysteries for the curious mind with a short attention span, I believe is how we pitched it. Yeah. Sorry to interrupt, but go ahead. Well, I mean, all that's true, but more importantly, they were written by me solely to channel the late great Paul Harvey and provide a short-form podcast for people, like me who are terribly busy and lack the attention span to listen to two people like us

free associate for 90 minutes, right? That's how this thing started. And believe me, we hear every day from people who say, so Mike, are you ever going to go back to that format? Because I'd rather enjoyed it. So Matt was a fan of this format, but he thought they could be brought to life visually. And I said, Matt, with respect, that's a stupid idea. I don't want want to do that. I want people who listen to this podcast to fill in the blanks with their imagination. And because these stories all have a reveal or a surprise, I don't see how you're going to be able to visually engage people without spoiling a misdirect. Yep. And he said, yeah, that's a good point, but I still think it could work. And I said, well, I don't and I own them. So let's talk about

something else. Let me tell you what this guy does. He goes away for about three months. And I don't know how much money he spends, but he spends a lot. He hires dozens of actors. He picks three stories from my library of the way I heard it. Hires a director. And he goes out into the world and he brings these stories to life. I'm not going to tell you which ones because I don't want to spoil it. But he shows these to me about eight months ago. And you could have knocked me over it with a feather. I couldn't believe he did this. I mean, in this industry, the idea you take somebody's intellectual property

and just create these beautiful pieces of cinema around it without permission, without clearance. I mean, he has no right to air these. He has no right to do anything with them at all. But he did it anyway. and he's showing it to me. And I look at him, I say, I got to admit, dude, these are good. These are really entertaining. What do you want to do with them?

He said, oh, I don't know. I just wanted to show you I could do it. Yes. And he did. And you're right. They turned out great because I felt the same way that you did. It was like, oh, we can't do that because you're going to give too much away. There's no way to shoot around it.

Well, he found a way. and it really does work. You know, the three that he did were terrific. We're great. Now we're doing more. Now we're doing more. But just so people understand, he didn't just take the audio of me telling the story

on the podcast channel. He took video of me telling the story to an empty theater. And we did this with maybe 40 or 50 of these stories just because we thought it might be fun for people to experience them, you know, not with recreation, but with me on camera.

That's what Matt saw. So what he did was he took that telling of the story and used it as a trunk and intercut back and forth between me on stage, talking to an empty theater with these cinematic reimaginings. And he put them together and he showed them to me and yes, I love them and I said,

what are you going to do? And he said, I got no plans. And then I thought about it. And I started to feel bad because the guy spent a lot of money, and I just couldn't believe he would do it that precipitously. And I said, look, why don't you and I sit down and talk about why you wanted to turn these stories into these mini bits of cinema? And he said, yeah, I guess that could be kind of interesting.

You mean just kind of unpack the story behind the story? And I said, yeah, I can tell you why I wrote this. the story, why I picked it, and maybe you can tell me why you like it. Because I believe, as the son of a preacher man, which he is, you might be able to find some sort of underpinning in the Old or the New Testament, some sort of biblical precept that might inform some of the overarching themes that make these stories what he called a mini-morality plays. So I said, you know what, let's just experiment and try it. So I went to Colorado and we sat down and he's got this amazing barn and this amazing set. It's really, it's one of the best setups I've ever seen. Best cameras in the world. Great crew.

An amazing setting. And we play these stories back and then we talk about them. Long story short, what we've got here is a format that I don't think existed before. It's part performance art, part podcast, part cinematic recreation, part talk show, and part psychotherapy. It's really, the conversations we have about the business of writing these stories and bringing them to life are weirdly good. And so we've done a bunch of them, and the first 13 are going to premiere on May 7th. It's called The Story Behind the Story. It's based on the way I heard it.

And yeah, that's the third show that's going on. on. And the third reason why the calendar is a hot mess. Yeah. Well, first of all, just to minor correction, I think it's going to be one episode each week beginning on May 7th. That's right. Right. That's right. Okay. Not all 13. They don't all premiere at the same time, but you know, that's when they hit. 13, one after the next for 13 weeks. And then probably 13 more. Well, yeah. I mean, I think there's about 30, 30 to 40 of them. I know. It's crazy. So anyway, obviously, we'll keep this audience up to speed first and foremost, because this audience is the reason that show is happening. And I'll make sure a date and time and all that other stuff is happening. But to review,

dirty jobs sometime in the fall, how America works, April 25th. The story behind the story, May 7th. Discovery, FBN and TBN, respectively. Correct. And of course, this podcast, every week, whether we have a guest or not, can't get away from that. We had a guest. We did. We a guest. We just chose to just do it with you rather than another person as well. I'm not a bad guest. I mean, I'm an okay host. I think I'm a better guest, actually. You're a pretty good guest. I actually listened to an old podcast that you were on on my walk today because someone came a sniff and wanted you again, and I'm like, I don't know, I don't know this guy and I listened. I'm not going to mention names. I just mention and read it out. I'll add all this out. Yeah. Well, I mean, the real reason is I

can't remember his name. So, but. The other thing I wanted to mention to you is that we are in the middle of the work ethic scholarship program. Yep. Right? Yep. This is another big thing that's happening.

And the application process is going to close soon. And then we will be reviewing the applications and hopefully giving away a million dollars again for the third consecutive year. doubt about it. We're going to give away more than a million dollars this year. We raised a lot of money. That song generated all kinds of money, some more of those crap auctions raised money. What was the other thing? Oh, noble Tennessee whiskey. There it is, right behind me. Jesus a whiz, man. It's so nuts because the foundation really became, I don't know when it happened, but if the calendar is the solar system, right, 10 years ago, the sun would have been dirty jobs.

Now the sun is microworks. And it takes up time. It takes up more of your time than anything else with the possible exception of this podcast. This is probably number one. And that's number two for sure. Yeah. There's a lot of it. And particularly nowadays, I don't know if you've seen the goofy, stupid videos that I've been doing, which are a little off-putting.

I know. Yeah, but we're constantly doing that trying to get the word out all the time. And a lot of people are signing up. I can't remember what the numbers are. that would have been a good thing to know at this point. Oh, it's record breaking. We're way over 4,000 at this point. Oh, is that right? Who started the application process? Yeah. And look, that's the thing, guys. If you're going to start the application process, you've got to finish it, microworks.org slash scholarship. Actually, you don't have to finish it, but if you don't,

you won't get the money. That's correct. These are work ethic scholarships, as always, reserved exclusively for people who are desiring to learn a skill that's in demand, as opposed to going to a four-year school. And so we're up to our neck in that. I shot a music video yesterday. Don't want to talk too much about that, but it's for Noble, Tennessee Whiskey. We have a new tranche of that, another chunk.

I don't know how many exactly, but first come, first serve. Three. We have three bottles, so you better hurry. Yes, three bottles. Now, we got more than that, but the net proceeds go to the foundation, and that's over at NobleSpirits.com. Oh, my God, there's that.

There's this stand together. other thing I mentioned, which is so interesting. You know, Charles Koch, his foundation, has supported my foundation for years now. And his main focus is this organization called Stand Together that has dozens and dozens of really terrific charitable pursuits that are involved. And when I was in Florida, I spoke to them about a number of things, possibly another project, Chuck, you'll be delighted to know, which would completely. just make a farce out of the calendar. But we'll see.

All that's swirling around. Yeah. And of course, Facebook. And the questions, the questions that are constantly, you know, I feel terrible for not answering more questions from people the way I used to. But there's just been no time. Shameless plug. Long before she was Peggy Rowe, my mom was Peggy Noble,

daughter of Carl and Thelma Noble. It was her first. father, Carl, who inspired me to pitch a show called Dirty Jobs to the Discovery Channel, and later start a foundation that honored the kind of work Carl Noble did for a living, trade work, skilled labor. That foundation is called MicroWorks, and today I'm proud to tell you that we've helped thousands of people get the training they need to begin a career in the skilled trades. In fact, we'd love to help you. You can apply for a work ethic scholarship right now at microwworks.org. We've set aside $10 million for this year's Apple.

Thanks to a number of very effective fundraisers, including the one with my grandfather's name on the label. I refer, of course, to Noble Tennessee Whiskey, K-N-O-B-E-L, which is now available in a variety of delicious mash bills, all of which you can peruse at Noble Spirits.com. In fact, if you spend 100 bucks and use code Carl, C-A-R-L, you'll get one tube of orange-bitter-infused sugar cubes. for free. That's Code Carl with a C to get nine sugar cubes, ingeniously engineered to make nine perfect old fashions every time. It's my favorite way to support microworks and my favorite whiskey to sip responsibly after a long day of interviewing people on this podcast. Pick up a bottle at noblespirates.com. K-N-O-B-E-L-Spirits.com. Soon may the noble men come to bring a bottle for everyone.

One day when the waitin is done, we'll take a drink and go. Yeah, you really are a busy guy. One of the things I wanted to mention, though, you just posted this recently, the video of you talking to actual noble customers. I think we arranged a thing where I called these people and said, hey, you know, we'd just like to talk to you and see what you thought of the whiskey, just random customers. And then we got them on a Zoom. and then you surprised them, pop on. They literally didn't know you were going to be there. Some may have suspected, I think, but they didn't know.

And it was really kind of a cool thing to do. Look, it's great. And I want to do a lot more of it. We're still trying to figure out if this thing is a business or a fundraiser. You know, it's been a terrific fundraiser so far. But the feedback on the whiskey itself has been really, really good to the point where the people involved are like, hey, dummy, don't be stupid. figure this out. It could be a great long-term fundraiser for your foundation, but this could also

be on shelves everywhere. People seem to like it. So just thinking about ways, you know, that aren't gross or icky just to keep the name out there and get people talking about it. And I don't know, man, for as long as I've been doing dirty jobs, people have been like, yeah, it'd be fun to sit down and have a beer with you or maybe a pop. And so this was just a fun virtual way to thank people for buying the whiskey and it was really fun talking to them. It got out of hand as it always does. Some of them went for like a half hour, but, you know, I mean, this is just a sign of the times, man. Can you imagine 32 years ago when I was trying to map out what I'd be doing at 60, the idea that I'd be sitting in front of something called a laptop, which didn't exist at the time, zooming, which wasn't

a verb at the time, with fans of a show that didn't exist at a time. about a whiskey that hadn't been distilled at the time to raise money for a foundation that wasn't even an idea at the time. It just goes to show what the hell do you know, really, about anything. How are your parents doing? They're great. Dad's 89.

He made a coffee table the other day in wood shop from my mom. I saw that, yeah. That's great. My mom, her book, dude, her book is so good. But this is another thing that's going to suck the life out of me. As soon as we finish this, I've got to go finish the forward. Of course, I'm writing another forward. She's written three books.

I've written three forwards. Such a drag. Her books get better and better. My forwards get worse and worse. It's going to be great. It's called, I guess I can tell, I'll tell you guys. It's not going to be a secret for long. It's called vacuuming in the nude.

And it is just a really warm. funny look at my mom's journey as a writer. You know, she wrote every day, Chuck, for 60 years. That's incredible. For 60 years before she got a publishing deal. And, you know, her dream as a young woman, as a 30, 40-year-old woman, her dream was to be a published author. And the amount of rejection my mom got when I look back at it, you know, it's just incredible. I mean, week after week, month after month, year after year, it's just such a hard business to break into and then to see her become a published, not just a published author, but a best-selling author, at 80. I mean... Yeah, it's pretty amazing. It's incredible, man, and I'm trying to think of something

sensible to say in this forward. And I'm coming back to one of the foundation precepts. Don't follow your passion, but always bring it with you. Because her passion for so long, her dream was to be a published writer. And what makes her so interesting is not the fact that her dream didn't come true for all those years. It's the fact that she kept working after she stopped dreaming. Like she literally gave up on being a best-selling author, but she never gave up on the work. she never stopped writing. And to this day, she's 84 and she writes every single day. Her blog is on fire. She's got hundreds of thousands of people who are liking that. And her new book is the best thing she's ever written. So, you know, we've got to get out there and do that justice too. Right. Save room on the

calendar for that, would you? Yes, yes, we will do that. Listen, I just want to say, give a shout out to everybody who is interested in the trades. This is a... the time to apply for a work ethic scholarship. It's real money for real jobs that are really in demand. You can go to microworks.org slash scholarship and apply. There's not a lot of time left, so do it soon because it doesn't, you can't do it. You can't just sit down and do it in 10 minutes. It takes a little bit of time. Are you landing the plane now? Are we like done or nearly done? Yeah, we've been talking for an hour. I think that's reasonable. Yeah, but people are still listening. How do you know?

I guess I don't Mike isn't it possible we're the only ones who can hear our voices Hey man do you want to talk about the thing we were talking about

before that you don't want me to talk about that I think we should what do you think I don't think you want to but I think we should all right everybody thanks so much

and leave us a five-star review come on really or listen to the song really oh by the way that people love that song but people love that song. We're going to play it in a minute, and when you hear it,

if it sounds at all familiar, it's based loosely on a dirty jobs chorus I wrote a couple of years ago, which went along the lines of, now everyone who's got a job has got his dues to pay, working for that paycheck and getting through the day, but if you're bored or otherwise inclined to be a slob,

grab some boots and lose that suit and get a dirty job. And then it goes, 30 jobs there everywhere. Just take a look at it. Take a look at it. That's basically the melody. We just chunked out four parts. Chuck was kind enough to hit some of the high notes that are well beyond my manly tessotora.

And I filled in the rest and people are like, hey, man, you guys should sing more. I mean, I've loved your podcast, but I never reviewed it until you begged me to do so in song. Right. It worked. Anyhow, so we really can't talk about that thing you don't want to talk about? No, man. I just don't think it's worth it. Why would we talk about that thing?

It's one human. No, no, it's many humans. It's many, many humans, dude. Many people were concerned. You might not have heard from them, but this happens every time the guest we had last week goes out into the world. I talked to him about it. When he talks about the importance of fitness and the importance of being healthy, it's amazing how much grief he gets from people who simply don't want to hear it or who feel threatened by it.

And we heard from some people who thought perhaps there was a certain amount of, what do you call it? Fat shaming? Is that the expression? Yeah. Yeah. We're not talking about this. You don't want to talk about it. You really don't want to.

No. Because I won't talk about it if you don't want to talk about it. It feels like you really do want to talk about it. And I don't think we should. I don't think it's necessary. Well, of course, nothing that's happened in the last hour and ten minutes is necessary. No, that all had to happen. It was important.

It was meaningful. And, you know, we broke some stuff down. Mainly you just told stories. We don't have to take a deep dive, but I want to say something. I want to say that if anybody was hurt, or offended by my conversation last week with Vinnie Tortorich about the business of eating, overeating, under-eating, healthy eating, or anything else, I met no offense. I'm personally convinced that one of the greatest problems, certainly the greatest health crisis

we have in our country right now, is obesity. and many of my close friends are struggling with this problem day after day. And if I said something that came off as glib or unsympathetic, I certainly didn't mean that. But I do feel really, really, really, really strongly that you and I, Chuck, we were on the wrong side of this two years ago, three years ago. It's hard to lose weight. And it's threatening sometimes, I think, and uncomfortable to be on the other end of that kind of a conversation.

And so I meant no offense, but I'd do it again in a heartbeat because I needed somebody to push me to get healthier. And I'm glad that happened. And I hope last week's conversation is useful for people and for those who found it challenging or a bridge too far. sorry there that wasn't so bad it wasn't no no it wasn't it was just

just great and um I mean look most of the reactions that we got were really positive really positive good

good I'm glad but last week was not Vinny that was two weeks ago where's the time go oh yeah by the time of this airs You know what, we're not going to get any criticism from Katie Hughes. She was delightful.

How do you not like a woman who's committed to getting girls involved in the skilled traits? You got to love her. There's a question I meant to ask before. Is that like, do you have a favorite guest, Mike? Oh, God. Who's your favorite guest? On the podcast? No, no, on the Tonight Show.

Yes, on the podcast. Well, look, man, as I've always said, I have some friends who are famous and I have more friends who aren't. And I think the most interesting podcasts are ones that stay on their feet with an anonymous guest who has something interesting to say or some sort of connection with us. And so with respect to Jay Leno and Tim Allen, I'm happy to talk to celebrities if they want to talk. but it just seems like they're all over the place, celebrities. You know, I enjoyed having Paul Kelly on here, guy I worked with at QVC all those years ago. I enjoyed my old friend Michael Gellert.

I like talking to Mary Sullivan. I like talking to you. I like talking to people who I know who I think the country ought to know. Those are my favorite guests. I like Dr. Peter. Lilback. Lilback was a great guest.

I mean, I've enjoyed every guest that we've had The only times I think maybe I'm not quite sure what I'm doing is when we go back and forth. Like, obviously, my mom is my favorite guest. And I would have her on every week if I could. And people tell me that they wish I would. Yes. But I can't because she's really busy. She is super busy.

So is your dad, too. That was my favorite part the last time they were on right after Christmas when they're recovering from COVID. And he's like, yeah, I got. to leave in 10 minutes because I got to go to wood shop. It's like, the dude is, how old is he, 89? He's 89. Yeah. He's 89. He's 89. He's like, yeah, I'd love to stay and chat on your podcast, but I got to go make a coffee table. He's my hero. You know what? Let's have him on. Let's have my mom on as soon as her book is available. Yeah. Do we know when that is? I don't. It's going to be available for pre-orders soon, probably.

Yeah. But I don't know. Then we'll have her on soon. Yeah. Anyway, look, everybody, thank you for your patience. And you too, Chuck. I know the calendar's a mess, and it's only going to get worse from now through the end of May. But we're committed to keeping this podcast in some way, shape, or form up every week.

And we've got some great guests in the hopper, and we will find the time to get her done. Come hell or high water. Final thoughts? just as vacant as I can be at this moment. I have no final thoughts. Right. Imagine a 32-pound bell on my head and me underwater. Yeah.

Just a cold wind over an endless more. And on that note... Hey, you got a title for this one? No. Do we do a preamble for this one? There's the question. I mean... I think we do.

I don't think we do. No? No, what would we say? We're not going to do it. We would talk about what you're going to hear coming up, like we always do. Or what you're not going to hear. We could talk about the stuff you don't want to talk about. That's where we could put.

In the preamble? Okay, great. It's perfect. Yeah. All right. Well, okay. Well, yeah. Now, if we don't do it, because I was thinking about, you know, like where the ads are going to go in here as we were going along.

Oh, were you really? And, yeah, it was, yeah. I'd say, you know, because I wonder where your mind goes when your eyes glaze over and you don't ask you a question. I just see it staring off into the emptiness, into the void of your second bedroom. Like, what are you doing? I'm wondering where we're going to put the ad. Let's put one right here. It's just, yeah.

We got to update the five-star review song. We got to update that. All right. I want to rewrite the words to the verse, and then the spoken word at the end. I think it'll be fun. All right. I think it'll be...

Well, I want to make a video of it. Okay. Put that up there. Why don't we do that? Let's make that right now. All right. I mean, people are still listening. I don't think they want to listen.

do that. Nobody's listening. Yeah, they are. Only Ross is listening and he's going like, when is this going to end? No, man. They're listening. No? I'm telling you. I mean, not a lot of them. If you're out there, please tell us you're listening. So, Mike, what was the most disappointing part of your most recent podcast? This is cool. This is. This right here.

Good. All right then. We're officially done. Thanks, everybody. Couldn't do it without that. I mean, look, let's be honest. We could do it without you, but it wouldn't be nearly as fun. We just did.

Sorry, we just, too much? No, no, we just did. We just did it without them. But then once we put this on the air, then they'll... Oh, I see what you're saying. I guess we should... Maybe we should thank the sponsors, too. Because you know what?

We really couldn't do it without them. Oh, you know, I guess we just did. Didn't. Hmm. The way I heard it, the only podcast that doesn't need a sponsor or an audience. I'm Mike Rowe. And I'm Chuck Klausmeier. And this is goodbye.

Good day. This episode is over now. I hope it was worthwhile. Sorry it went on so long, but if it made you smile, then share your satisfaction in the way that people do. some time to go on and leave us a review. I hate to ask, I hate to beg, I hate to be a nudge, but in this world the advertisers really like to judge.

You don't need to write a bunch, just a line or two. All you've got to do is leave a quick five-star review. All you've got to do is leave a quick five-star review. And not true. All you've got to do is leave a quick five-star review. Definitely not too. All you got to do is leave a quick five-star review. We need five.

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