The Way I Heard It with Mike Rowe - 373: Coffee with Mom—The Wedgie Kick with Peggy Rowe

Episode Date: February 29, 2024

America's grandmother recalls the harrowing details of her husband's heart attacks at Christmas, gives an update on his convalescence, and tells a shocking tale about the newsletter you do NOT want to be mentioned in. From stents to physical therapy, shuffleboard to bingo, and that little dance we do when our panties are in a bunch, it's another edition of Coffee with Mom!  

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demystifying AI. It's filled with sort of, super useful information, and again, it's free at netseweet.com slash mike. That's net sweet.com. A cup of coffee with my mom. I don't know. I mean, we definitely all have haircuts, but I don't know that yours is the worst, mom. I mean, top three for sure.

It's just a little short. It is a little shorter than I'm used to sing. When did you get a cut? a week ago. So it's growing out. In the beginning, I mean, I looked like a boy, sort of. I find that hard to believe. Well, that's funny.

It's like a week and a half ago, Chuck looked like a girl. Fair, fair. What do you think of the haircut, Peggy? Much better? Much better. Much better. I couldn't believe how long it was when you went like this. And it was flowing all over me.

Really? Yeah. Yeah, we shot it in slow motion. I said, pretend you're making a pantine commercial. You know exactly what I was talking about. Oh, yeah. So, yeah. We all got a haircut.

The girl who cuts my hair was horrified by the haircut I got in Munich. She said, this is terrible. What did they do to you? What did the Germans do? It wasn't Munich. Sorry, it was Zurich. I didn't hate it. But she took it personally.

Well, maybe she did it from the left side instead of the right side or something. Well, she showed me the back of it. And I had to admit, I knew it was short, but I didn't realize it was that short. He almost gave me a buzz cut in the back and left the top really long. But there's Zurich, you know, and I didn't feel, I don't know. I was intimidated. He was like 27 years old and spoke six languages. I didn't feel like I was in a position to tell him how to cut hair.

Oh, the girl who just did your hair was appalled by the. Yes, I went into the city yesterday. Well, no, it wasn't yesterday. It was a day before. Anyway, yeah, went in to get a haircut, and she just looked at me and shook her head. as if to say, why would you let anyone do that to yourself? And I told her about Chuck's haircutting experience on the podcast. And she knew the famous hairdresser who came in to cut Chuck's hair, which she did.

Yeah. Yeah, she had heard of him. Dennis, how do you say his last name? Chetzen. Yeah. All right, so it's been a week of haircuts. Yeah, how about that? Well, you know, I haven't seen you guys in a long time.

Yeah, when? Yeah, it was December. We did the spectacular Christmas episode where everyone was dressed quite festively, as I recall. Super lighthearted, a lot of fun. People loved it. Then Dad had a giant heart attack. Yeah. Christmas night.

Listen, I will never forget that night. It was horrid. Well, you know, I mean, I know people are anxious to hear from you. So we should talk about that just so you know, I have talked about it to Chuck on the podcast. a little bit before. Actually, when I was in Liechtenstein, not long after the aforementioned haircut, and before I realized it was such a terrible shearing, I sat there in my hotel room and just answered some people's questions. Mom, so many people. So many people are so worried about your husband and my dad. I mean, it's just, it was very heartwarming, an amazing outpouring of

well-wishes and concern. I hope you noticed that, too. There really has been on social media, And everywhere we go, I mean, Dad can't walk down the hall without having somebody say, how are you doing, Mr. Roe, or how are you doing, John? Are you feeling better? You look good. Your color's really good. People like to talk about his color. But he really is doing very well.

He was a good patient. Absolutely wonderful. I hear people complain about their husbands, other women complain about their husbands when they're sick. and, you know, under the weather. And they're just terrible patients. They just can't get far enough away from them. They're just so horrible. But Dad is so appreciative of everything that I do.

Really? Well, I was so glad to be there. By the way, if you don't know what we're talking about. My dad had, I think, a series of heart attacks the week before Christmas and a big one on Christmas night. And he was rushed to the hospital. It's a long story. my mom has blogged about it, but, you know, he's 91 years old, and we just really thought, I mean, honestly, what was it, like a 98% blockage mom in his left main?

Yeah, 95 to 98 in the left main artery, the ventricle. And, I mean, without that part of your heart working, you're gone. You just can't survive without that. And he woke up at 4.14 a.m. We both remember the time. And he had just come back from the bathroom and just stumbled into bed and said, I need one of those pills. I need one of those pills. The pain is so bad I can't stand it.

And so I got him in nitroglycerin. We put it under his tongue. I checked the clock and then I called security here at the home right away. And they were here like two minutes later. That's great. That's great. Yeah. And they brought oxygen.

and they deal with this all the time. I think this is probably one of their main things that they respond to. Sure. Because there are 2,000 people here in independent living, and one of the major concerns with the elderly, especially men, is a heart. And so they're very used to that. And before he even came here, he called 911.

I saw the red lights from the ambulance on the wall here through the window shortly after they arrived, shortly after security arrived with the oxygen. And they gave him, I think it was they who gave him three aspirins right away. And then the paramedics came in and took over and it was, and I was trying to get some close. on, I'd run over to the closet and trying to get dressed because I knew I was going to be going to the hospital. But I could hear, it's funny, it was both comforting and horrifying to see them working on dead so hard. It was comforting to see that he was getting the attention and that, you know, people were here helping him. But horrifying that when they said, stay with me, stay with me, John, stay with me. And I knew, you know.

It was a close thing. It's hard to talk about it even now. And I knew it was really serious. And he was just sweating profusely. I mean, he was in a puddle on the bed and on the pillow. And it was just running off his face. He was in such agony. So I think they might have put one more nitro under his tongue.

And then I don't know what all they did. I was busy being worried, you know. Yeah. And this on the heels of five or six days of, I won't say a misdiagnosis, but we just didn't know what was going on. They thought it might be acid reflux. They thought it might be some digestion thing. They were giving him gas X, right? All this stuff is going on.

And we're just waiting to get through the holidays so we can get to see an internist and then this. Right. Well, they had done all the tests that you do, the stress test. That was negative, echo cardiogram, everything showed that it was not the heart. So when I talk about misdiagnosis, you know, I feel like I should have been smarter the week before. I should have said to them, no, it has to be something heart related because he's having these terrible chest pains, pains down his arms. And those symptoms are indicative of a heart attack. I mean, everybody knows that.

So they really took it seriously when he got to the hospital and arranged for him to go to Union Memorial Hospital. First of all, they did an angiogram, which is a picture of the heart, and they did blood work, which showed that he had had a major heart attack. There were enzymes in his blood that showed signs of a heart attack. So they took him to Union Memorial Hospital, where practice. practically right away. They took him to the cat lab and put in three stents. And that's the time I basically got there. You know, Scott was there for a few days. I came in when he finally came home. Anyway, we don't have to relive the whole thing, but I just know, you know, on the one hand, people have just been so curious and they really do care.

And on the other hand, so many people listening have been through this. They've been with a loved one who goes through this event. Or like me, they've been 3,000 miles away from a loved one and feeling so completely helpless. And, you know, you're suddenly just praying and your whole day is upside down. And it's not a new thing, but it's new for you. You know, it's new for everybody the first time they go through it. And it's a heck of a thing, you know. It's a big deal. I've learned a lot.

The response, the outpouring is so huge that you can't do. with it. You simply can't deal with it. Even family, dad and I have like 36 cousins and, you know, immediate, almost immediate family. And we just couldn't take everybody's calls and texts and emails. And I finally ignored them and I did tell a couple of people, I'll be on social media. So every day or every couple of days, I posted about dad's progress. And honestly, the response was amazing. I mean hundreds and hundreds of thousands

and comments. It's a hell of a thing Chuck when you call your mother to see how your dad's doing and she says if you're really interested you can check my status. Check me out. Check me out on Instagram and Facebook. It's all there. I'll talk to you some other time. It was a blow

by blow description and I wrote one that I called the patient pooped. And the thing is So many people can relate to this. When you've had serious surgery, going to the bathroom again is a big deal. And so I talked about that and his first shower and how I don't want to let him out of my sight. And I talked about all of my responses.

People related big time. They all have had some experience with this, you know, with a loved one. Yeah, but it's weird, mom. I mean, for all of millennia, people have endured this level of fear and anxiety and uncertainty and so forth. But it's a very, very recent thing that people might choose to share it with a few hundred thousand strangers. That's new. And I remember talking to you just a couple of years ago when you were very, very grudgingly entertaining the idea of having a Facebook page. I remember telling you, look, I didn't want one either.

But if you're going to have one, you can't simply use it to tell people, watch my podcast, buy my whiskey, watch my TV show, listen to my songs, buy my book, right? I mean, it's part of it. You know, it took me a while to really understand what the unspoken bargain is between you and a few hundred thousand people. You're never going to meet. but you let them into your life. And now, through some very strange phenomenon, it's not only okay, it's almost required to let them know that your husband pooped, right? Well, I said it very tastefully. I mean, I didn't.

And on day three, the patient pooped. Well, everybody knows what that means, of course. but in every subsequent post, I give them updates of Dad's condition. And of course, they're not all medical. And can I share this one with you that I did like three days ago? Please. Actually, it was on the 14th Valentine's Day. Big day, my husband decided to drive himself to cardiac rehab.

I'll be fine, he said. I have to do it sometime. He was right, but still. After our departure check, hearing aids, teeth, glasses, cell phone, car keys, and lanyard to get back into the building, we hugged and kissed, and John left with his mechlazine in one pocket and his nitroglycerin in his other jeans pocket. Two hours later, I watched him pull into our parking spot, said amen, and ran back to my computer. As we left for the dining room in a special Valentine's dinner this evening, John used his key to lock our door while I walked on ahead. Hey, what's with your leg? he asked.

Catching up to me in the hallway, you're lifting your right knee and throwing it out to the side. Is something wrong? No, I responded. I'm just trying to get my underwear straightened out. We laughed together, looking forward to our special Valentine's Independence, date night. Well, I can't tell you how many comments were from people who know about that underwear maneuver. And now I can't go anywhere here at the home with 2000 independently without somebody saying to me, how's your underwear today pay? Did you get your underwear all straightened down? Dad got a call the next day from his friend Steve, who lives down in Virginia.

And he said, can I talk to Pegg for a minute? And John and Dad said, well, I put her on, I'll put it on speaker. And he called out, Peg, how's your underwear today? It's like everybody knows about my underwear. So I have to be careful. Well, again, that's the point. You brought it up. I'm assuming you're not going commando for this conversation, are you?

Michael, I don't do that, honey. Except when I take a shower and go to bed. Well. Oh, but then you added. a little comment. Well, I saw it like thousands of other people. I scrolled by and I saw it and, you know, what's the son supposed to say when his mother reveals such a thing?

I did a nice picture of Dad, me, in our red sweaters. What was Mike's comment? Mike's comment is, Mother, good to know you're wearing underwear again. Well, people thought that was funny. But anyway, so I have to know that whatever I write gets a big responses. Yeah, but the big responses, and we talked about this too once upon a time, you know, the big responses are not to the big stories, unless it's something life-changing,

like a health emergency or most of the big reactions are to small things. You basically got a wedgy on your way to a Valentine's dinner, you know? You were waiting for your husband? And I dealt with it. In a very clever way. What's your other option, Chuck? Reach back there, grab a fistful and start tugging. I mean, that's the way I do it. Yeah. Listen, I'm not alone. I can't tell you how many people have said to me, oh, yeah, that's the wedgy kick. I do that.

Oh, yeah. I do that all the time. You got to do it. It's a little wedgy kick. Little did I know there was a name for it. Well, I got to tell you, Peg, that I got so many texts and emails from people that we deal with at work, you know, who follow the podcast, follow you on social, just reaching out saying, hey, How's John doing? How's John doing? It was a big outpouring even just through email and text. Well, people are still raving, raving, I tell you, about my mother's performance in the latest Pure Talk commercial.

And if you haven't seen it, I encourage you to give it a look on my Facebook page and read the comments. They're hysterical. In this commercial, you'll not only see Peggy Rowe gently criticizing her oldest son for his long stand. and well-established commitment issues. You'll learn about the latest offer from Pure Talk, which includes unlimited talk, text, and data for just $3499 a month with no contracts and no commitments of any kind. You can see why I love these guys.

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in a national advertising campaign. Do what my mom did. Get yourself unlimited high-speed data for just 3499 a month. At puretalk.com slash row, you can switch. which in as little as 10 minutes at puretalk.com slash row. Pure Talk. Yeah, it's heartwarming. It really is. People really care. And let me tell you, he's not unique here at the home.

Everybody, it's hard to run into anybody who doesn't have stents. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, I got my stents three years ago. Oh, I got my stents five years. Oh, yeah, I just got my stents. last summer. And a Carol. Carol and my, I can't remember her last name.

Last names aren't important. Oh, good. It's probably better. I don't use it. Yeah. She said, we're going to talk about their stents or their mesh bladder thing. Or their underwear. Or their underpants or what depilatory or something.

She said to John, John, I have seven. I have seven stents, she said. Wow. I think she got them in two separate surgeries, like four the first time and three the second time. It is a miracle, isn't it? This whole modern medicine thing? Oh, my – listen, I met – Scott was here. Scott came right away.

He was only two hours away by plane, and you were seven. Yeah, my – our middle son. So he came, and he was here in time to take me to the hospital, to be with Dad when he got his stents. And afterwards, they were pushing Dad down the hall into the recovery room, and the doctor came out. He has a long, fancy name, but he is a cardiologist, but he is an interventionalist cardiologist.

And he is the doctor, Dr. W-A-N-G, Dr. Wong. What a delightful man. Wong or Wang? Well, I guess we who speak English would call it Wang, but I do believe they pronounce it Wong. It's all right. He pronounces it Wong. I'm no expert. But anyway. Well, two Wongs don't make it white.

Oh. But two whites made the airplane. Almost. I don't get it. Two rights made the airplane. Oh, that's true. You were close, Chuck. Well, I just wistled a little bit.

Dr. Wong came out into the hallway. Scott and I were standing there, and he said, do you have a minute? Come in here, I want to show you something. We share something with you. So this cardiologist, interventionalist, who is in such demand and world famous, pulled off a couple of chairs, he said, sit here. So Scott was next to me, and he has this big computer on his desk, big screen. monitor and he said this is what just happened in the cat lab and he proceeded to show us a video of dad's procedure going up through the arteries you know and um oh and putting the stent in first of all

he showed us the blockage it was an artery that was pinched together nothing could get through the left main artery. I mean, it was completely shut off. And this is what caused the heart attack. And then he showed them going up through there. They have a camera, and they have, I don't know. It's amazing. It really is a miracle.

He said, and this is the after. And they showed that same artery that had been so pinched, opened up fully with this. kind of a meshy-looking stint, and the blood could flow right through. It was just amazing. So the other two were not as seriously blocked as this left Maine. But anyway, yeah, it was quite an experience, and it was very educational. And every month's while, he would look at us and say, do you understand? Do you get this? Do you see what's happening? And a couple of times I said, uh-huh, but I didn't really. And Scott asked a lot of questions.

And Dr. Wong was so impressed that Scott was so interested. He was so flattered that somebody would actually understand what he was saying and ask questions. And, you know, they had quite a back and forth. And, well, it was a good experience. Well, you know, for me, that was a big lesson too. That's 30 Jobs 101. I mean, if you're curious about what people do, like really curious about how they make a living, that's a kind of flattery that you can.

can't, well, you can fake it, but I think people know when you're not. But it's that plus mortal stakes. And if I were like interviewing you now, not as your son, but just like, I'm trying to, what would I ask? Like you're a humorist. Your whole world is humor. Your whole reason right now at 86 is to look around and find the humor in a thing. Has this made it harder to do that? Has it made it more challenging? It's made it easier because I know how important it is to see the little things now, to appreciate the little things. A couple of things happened in the hospital that really got my attention,

aside from this procedure. That night before we left the hospital, Dad was bleeding in the groin, and they were applying pressure and ice and all that you do, to stop the bleeding. Well, the next morning when Scott and I got there, Dr. Wong was coming in, and he said, oh, well, let's take care of this. We're not going to fool around with this anymore. And he said to Dad, I'm going to take a couple of stitches in this to close it up so that you

stop bleeding. And Dad said, now, during the procedure, they did not give Dad heavy duty, what do you call that, put you to sleep. Pain killers, anesthesia. Anesthesia. They just gave him something called, it was very light. Twilight sleep. Twilight sleep.

And so Dad was aware somewhat of what was going on and could feel the pressure in his groin area where they had something called a balloon pump. And they were sending up things up to the heart through the groin. So Dr. Wong walked in and he said, I'll just take a couple of steps. And dad said, you're here to hurt me again. And we thought that was kind of funny. And Dr. Wong said, do you know how fortunate you are, young man, that you can feel pain? 50% of all people who experience a heart attack do not make it to the hospital alive. 50% of heart attack victims die before they even get the hospital.

And when he finished, Dad said, I didn't feel a thing. Didn't hurt me at all. So that was sort of humorous, yeah. Well, what about now, though? That's six weeks ago, eight weeks ago. I mean, you're at the home. You're looking around. You're up to your neck in mortality, really, you know.

Oh, Mike, let me tell you something funny. I hate to interrupt you, but. Please. is my podcast. I didn't even have a question fully formed. I was just making sounds. Go ahead, honey. No, I'm done.

You want to finish? No, no, be a humorist. Go ahead. I'm talking about mortality and humor. So we live here with almost 2,000 other people who are our contemporaries. There are some who are still in their 60s and 70s, but many of them are in their 80s and 90s. And even, I think there are 20-some who are over 100 centenarians. 20?

Over 20 people? It used to be 23. I'm not sure what it is right now. Wow. Probably less. Or maybe even more. Right. I mean, it's always coming and going.

Right. So, you know, mortality is part of our lives. I mean, there are boards in the post office where people's names are posted very tastefully on pretty wood people who pass away in that particular month. It's a fact of life and death, and we all look at it, and it's where we are in life. Well, you know, Dad's on the shuffleboard league. His division just finished all their games, so. To be clear, Mom, just to people understand, this is not like half a dozen people on the Lido deck on the love boat playing shuffle.

Oh, no. There were 79 teams this time. That means... 79 teams? 158 people were in the shuttle board league. Okay, so we got... Wow. We got, what do you call it a message that's sent out to everybody, not a flyer, because this is through email.

A group email. What? A group email? A group email. It was a group email. It was a group email. But it was like a email. the regular, oh, and I can't think of the word.

That's part of getting old. Pamphlets. It'll come to me. Yeah, you know, something like that. Anyway, so it was sent out to everybody in the league. And at the end, they said we're sad to announce that three members from the shuffle board league who have played in the past, and some now have died, have passed away. And we're, you know, we're sorry.

and Dad came running in here the other day because I don't get the message because I'm not on the shuffleboard leg. Dad came running in, he said, did you know Eddie Betts died? I said, no way. Well, these are friends of ours and we have mutual good friends

and they moved here after we did. I said, no way. I said, there must be another Eddie Betz here. John showed me the flyer thing. He said, here's their picture. It was a picture of him and his wife, Thelma. And I said, oh, my God, I'm so sorry to hear that. What a shock.

I'd seen them recently, and he is like 92 or 93. But he is, I mean, he is youthful. So I immediately called our mutual friend, Amy. And I said, Amy, have you heard anything from Eddie Betts lately? And she said, yeah, a few days ago. I said, well, we just got an announcement that he passed away. She said, no, no. I would have heard something. I said, yeah, I think he passed away a few days ago. And she said, Glenn, come over here. And they were in a grocery store,

and she called her husband over and told him. And he said, no, no way. And so I said, okay, you make some phone calls because they have a lot of mutual friends. They travel in the same group. And in the meantime, I called his widow Thelma to say how sorry I was I hadn't known sooner because this was several days earlier. Well, Eddie answered the phone. I said, Eddie, Eddie. He said, yeah, how are you doing, Peg? I said, well, I'm in shock. Wait a minute, I'll have to sit down.

I received an announcement. and he said, oh, let me tell you, you received an announcement that I died. Well, it's not true. He said, my neighbor came over yesterday and said, look at this. Well, they didn't play shuffleboard this year, so they didn't get the announcement, so they weren't aware that he was deceased. So his neighbor said, well, look at this. Well, they all had a good laugh about it.

So in the meantime, I said, Eddie, please give Amy a call. tell her that you are still with us. He said, okay, I'll do that. Maybe send her a text. I think a phone call from beyond the grave. It could really. I mean, that has to be stunning. I'm not dead yet.

Remember that. He's resting. You will be soon. So in the meantime, I called Casey, the woman who puts out the newsletter. Oh, that's what it is. It's a newsletter. Oh, there you go. Oh.

And she said, oh, Peggy, she said, I've been notified. She said, I am so sorry. This has taught me a lesson to verify the information that people give me. I was given that information erroneously, obviously. She said, do you have Eddie's number? I'm going to give him a call, and I need to apologize personally. And I said, okay, but don't worry too much about it because he's laughing harder than anybody. Sure, because he can.

Yeah. So. It dodged a bullet. I called Amy this morning. I said, Amy, how are you doing? She said, oh, I'm okay. I said, well, I guess you know the good news. She said, wait a minute.

Glenn just walked in with the paper, and he wants you to know that he just looked up the obituaries, and Eddie's name is not in it. But Eddie had called them, and so. So all is cool. But the moment when you called him, Mom, you call. Thelma, his widow, wife. Yeah, right. And he answers the phone.

Like, walk me through the emotions as your brain tries to make sense of the fact. Well, first of all, I think I felt relief. And then I really did sit down. And I said, Eddie, apparently there's some erroneous information out there. And he said, oh, yeah, I know. My neighbor came over and told me. And he laughed, and he laughed. So this morning, after I called Amy and she said, oh, yeah, we know, and his name is not in the obituaries.

But I talked to him this morning, and he doesn't feel well. Oh, no. She said, should I be worried? And I said, no. I said, we have a nice, really good medical center here, and I'm sure he'll be fine. So anyway. So I'm totally clear at this point. Eddie Betz is alive and well.

He's alive and well. He really has a very bad cold. So I talked to him again this morning, and he assured me that he's up and around and he's good. The reports of my demise have been greatly exaggerated. Eddie Betz's demise. It has been greatly exaggerated. I think it's the reports of my demise or the reports of my death have been greatly exaggerated. Let me look at reports of my demise have been greatly exaggerated.

Pretty sure it was Mark Twain. The reports of Eddie Betz's demise have been greatly exaggerated. exaggerated. Right. My death was erroneously reported years ago. I kind of remember that. Oh, do you? Good. Well, I mean, it wasn't you, though. There was another micro. There was another micro, but the one that made the rounds was the photo of a bank robber. Oh, right. It looked just like you. Remember? This guy looked just like me. He was wearing a ball cap and a gray hoodie. And it was a photo from the bank that he robbed. And it was sort of an all points bulletin nationwide thing. You know, this, be on a lookout for this guy. Yes. And somebody put it

on Facebook and under it, I mean, just thousands of people were like, dude, that's Mike Roe. Somebody, like, could get my, it's the dirty jobs guy. And maybe they canceled his show. He's robbing banks. Who knows what happened. I was in Baltimore. I don't know if I saw you on this trip or not, but I arranged to go over. I think it might have been Fox and Friends. It was one of the news shows. But I went on to disavow my larceny, but I went on in a gray hoodie and a ball cap.

And I really did look just like the guy just sitting there going, no, it's not me. I mean, really, mistaken identity, deep fakes, misinformation, disinformation. It's not unique to where you're living right now. It's everywhere. I love stories like this. Seven years ago, a guy named Ben Still was a musician.

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If you could eat a steer, if you could eat a cow, don't take a chance on a foreign ranch get good ranchers now. Ah! Well, this was a funny episode that ended happily. And Mike, you were correct. It is reports, the reports of my demise.

And it was, Mark. Dwayne. Sorry, the reports of my death are greatly exaggerated. Oh, the reports of my death. Yeah. Well, that's good. I mean, that's... You're not getting a nail file, are you, Peggy?

Yeah, what are you doing? You are? You are getting a nail file. You reached into the drawer for a nail fire. But I was going to be... I'll put that off till later. If you wouldn't mind, what is with you? Is it like a nervous tick?

Is it subconscious, you think? No, but, you know, if something feels a little rough, then you address it. But I can wait. I'll do it before dinner. File your nails. Nobody cares. Grief.

Hey, we did something different last night. You want to hear about our exciting Thursday evening? Probably. Yeah. Well, on Wednesday, we had dinner at Lakeside. Well, that's the cafeteria, cafe. And things are informal. You don't make a reservation.

You just walk in. You get a tray and you walk down, there's a hotline, and there are maybe four different entrees to choose from. All good. And veggies. And then on the other side are salads and desserts and beverages. Anyway, oh, and then there's a grill, and you can order something hot right from the grill, like salmon or chicken or all kinds of stuff. Sandwiches. We enjoy eating there.

So at the next table were Agnes and John. I won't give their last names. But they're in charge of bingo on Thursday nights. And they're very good at it, apparently. But dad and I have never played bingo. I might have played as a kid, but bingo really never did much appeal to me. But shuffleboard has ended. And after dinner, dad and I played pool.

But I thought, well, something a little bit different. and occasionally we play other games. So I said to Agnes and John, tell me about bingo. They said, well, it's Thursday night. It's down in Erickson Hall. Hundreds of people come. Come on, you'll enjoy it. And I said, okay, but we haven't played, and I'm not sure we'll know how to play.

John looked at me and he said, do this. Bingo, can you do that? So I said, bingo, he said, you'll be fine. And you count to 75. Do you recognize numbers up to 75? I said, yeah. And do you know the letters of the alphabet? B-I-N-G-O.

And I said, he said, you two will be fine. I said, okay, do they play a lot of cards? Because I met a woman here who plays 36 cards, not here. She goes to a big, fancy bingo hall down in Essex somewhere, and she wins. She's won $1,000. they pay big and she plays 36 cards and I said these people don't he said you can play one card or two cards or three cards some people play four you can stick with one if you want for the first time so how's it worked do you buy the card basically you do as you go in dad and I decided we could

handle two cards so we each got two cards and it's a dollar a card so we paid four dollars So we sat at the table. The cards are really neat. You remember years ago, when I was little, you played with pieces of corn. Yeah. And you put a kernel of corn on a number. And you better hadn't hit your card

or your corn goes all over the place. Well, these cards are really sophisticated. They have like a little window that you, at the top of each number, a little red window, then you just pull it down. Cellophane, you can see through it. So when they call that number, you just pull that little window down.

it's really easy and we kind of enjoyed it well because the people at the table were nice ladies and I knew two of them but you know dad doesn't hear real well so we were sitting with our backs to the callers because that's the least

desirable place that we got there late but there was one chair on the other side so dad went around and sat in that chair which meant I was no longer alongside of him and I am his ears often But the lady sitting next to him was Marilyn. And she was so nice. She took him under her wing.

And she watched his card. Every time they'd call a number, she'd repeat it in his ear. 65. Oh, 65. So she was very helpful. So we both decided that if Dad won, he was going to give her half of the pot. Well, the pot for the first 10 games was $16, which is not a bad little pot. Now you, Chuck, who gamble big time, you find that.

I just play poker. I don't gamble. Small potatoes. Oh, I see. And then the next five games were $15, I believe. I think that's how it went. And then the last game where you have to cover your whole card turned out to be $51. Well, bottom line was neither dad nor I won, but he thought he won one time.

And he yelled, bingo. And they sent somebody over and he said, oh, no. No, and then Marilyn said, no, you didn't win, John. You have to do this or whatever. Because it was a special one where you get special numbers, like you just do a window. It's hard to explain, end of four corners, or you do an X. Is there a penalty for a premature bingo or bing no, I suppose? Well, yeah, everybody looks at you and laughs, that's all.

Just shit. Oh, okay. There's a penalty box like in hockey. You go there and you feel shame. Just sit there in the bingo box. You put your head down. Yeah, but not being able to hear in a bingo game, that's devastating. That's rough.

I know. Next time I'll take a paper and pencil and I'll write it. They should have a board or something, you know, where the number flashes up for the heart of hearing. That would be good. Exactly. Exactly. We used to play bingo in my family all the time. You did?

All the time when I was a kid. And sometimes we still do when we go to the beach with a. with the kids will play bingo. It's a lot of fun, yeah. Not really. It's a little bit of more. Never played a game. Never in my life if I bought a bingo card.

Can I remember? Well, I grew up Catholic, so, you know, you played bingo. Oh, well, sure. Yeah. Yeah. I think bingo is big in the Catholic church. Very big, yeah. I mean, not on Sundays, maybe, but, you know.

Any day's fine. They had special games. Yeah. Yeah. But, I mean, it really isn't quite as demanding as, say pinnacle or mahjong or bridge probably. Bridge is the tough one. I don't get a bridge as a commitment, it seems.

I never really learned. I'll tell you, bridge players are pretty serious people. Yeah, but I don't enjoy being around them, really. Well, you don't talk. You don't eat. Right, because everything could be a tell, right? Everything could be a clue to your partner. Oh, yeah.

You eat a chip. Yeah, that could be. Hearts. Yeah. You eat an olive. Spades. Sure. Yeah. I guess so. But anyway, to each his own. Yeah. All right. So what's next? What's your day look like? Oh, well, let's see. We leave for dinner at four. We meet our Friday group. There are six of us, old friends from years ago. And we will have dinner together.

And then the guys will shoot pool and the girls will play. Um, tonight we're playing Pinnacle. Usually we play Rummy Cube, but we'll play Pinnacle tonight. And there'll be an underwear check at some point, Iso. Mm-hmm. Not that I know. It's not Strip Pinole. Nothing.

No. There's an image. There's an image. Strip Pinnacle every Friday at Oak Crest. At the home. At the home. Oh, my God. You want to turn the lights off for that one.

It's the game nobody wins. Yeah. Or wear a mask over your eyes. Very funny. Last week, we had a concert. There's an accomplished musician here who's a former Baltimore County school teacher. Yeah, Keith Derrickson. And he's accomplished.

And not only does he play the organ and the piano, he speaks very well. Well, when he retired, he started a little business where he talks about composers, Bach, Beethoven, Brahms, and he dresses up like them. And he goes around to elementary schools and talks about these composers, plays their works, and talks about why they're different or what makes their work so unique. But does he do it in the first person? He shows up as Chopin. Oh, absolutely. He is, last Sunday he was Bach. And talked about his family, his immediate family, you know, his siblings, his parents.

And it was delightful. And, you know, has a big screen up there and PowerPoint pictures. And then he'll sit and he'll play something on the harpsichord, something on the organ, something on the piano. So I sit there, and in a sense, I'm doing my planar writing because I'm writing about this. I have to make it good. I mean, I can't, you know, I can't just say, and then Keith sat at the piano and he played Prelude and B-sharp. And then he put his wig on, and then, you know, I have to make it interesting. But the most interesting part and the reason I could call it Plenair is,

the people around me and their reactions to what Keith is doing. And when he plays pieces that are sentimental pieces, I mean, I look around at these people and I see them dabbing tears. I see their eyes closed and I see them nodding. Oh, yes, I remember this piece from, it's wonderful that he can bring people together in such a way that, you know, they can kind of relive important moments in their lives. Well, don't sell yourself short. I'm looking at the comments right now underneath your nuclear wedgy or whatever that post was called. You have almost 2,000 people. 2,000 people. And they're not... Oh, I've commented. I have commented. You know,

some of them are just, they're describing the tears of laughter that are just streaking down their face. They're just, they're related to, you know, it's, I mean, you're absolutely right. You know, the audience, mom, this is the point. The audience is every bit as important. The people looking at the painting are as important as the painter. The people reading the book are as important as the author. The people listening to the music are as important as the musician.

Because without the audience, it's nothing. This is true. Exactly. And you know, Mike, I didn't want to be. on social media. I just thought it was a waste of time. People write about, well, today I went to the store and I washed my hair and I'm, who cares? Hey, by the way, an hour ago, we were talking about her hair cuts, so careful. We did a whole episode about cutting hair, yeah. Right. Social media has really taught me who my audience is when I write my books. They've given me an appreciation

for what my audience likes, what they want, what they appreciate, you know, what turns them on, what makes them laugh. And their comments tell me that. I don't read all of their comments by any means, but, you know, maybe a few dozen gives me an appreciation, and I'll skip around. And some of them are so funny. And then there are these horrible, horrible people. What do you call those people?

they might be bots or they might be real people. Trolls. Trolls who say, Oh, Anna, I really like your picture. And you look so familiar. Have you been to Ireland before? Or have you been to North Carolina before? Or I hate to be rude, but I've been trying to friend you.

And I, you know. And I'm so. proud of my followers. They don't give these guys the time a day, or they'll say, get lost, jerk, or, you know, or they just totally ignore them. And I'm so glad.

When is your next book done for the love of God? Well, it will certainly be out before next Christmas. I would hope so. But I should finish it by the end of summer. Yeah, let's go ahead and fast-track that a bit. Let's get it done in the spring. So we can...

Oh, really? Yeah. People want it. Oh. And it's... I'm well on the way. I know. I know. You know, it's funny. When I write, and I'm sure this is the same with all writers, I am there.

I am there in the setting that I'm writing about. I've been writing for the last two weeks a story about a man who lives here, who came to me with his story. He came to dad with his story. Dad put him on to me. When he was a child, his family was banished to Siberia. He lived in Lithuania. And he was 7th time. And his family was sent to Lithuania because, I mean, was sent to Siberia.

Because his father had been born in America, was an American citizen, although he left as a young child. and they had harbored a couple of Jews on their farm during the Nazi occupation of Lithuania. Annie had a big farm. His father had a big farm. And when communism took over, of course, it was all about not the individual farms, but the big conglomerates, the big, you know, for the country. and if you objected to them taking over your farm, then you were going to be banished,

and that's what happened to them. And he tells such a good story about the years they were in Siberia. And they were greeted after a couple of horrible weeks. I'm not going to get my story away, but they were greeted by an officer who said, you will be here at the invitation. of Comrade Stalin for the next 25 years,

which is a death, you know, it's a death notice. But anyway, so I've been in Siberia for the last two weeks, and yesterday I wrote for six hours, and at the end, I looked outside, and I was surprised there was no snow. I've been there in Siberia, where it's just horrible and so cold, and everybody's got frostbite, So anyway, that's the interesting thing about writing. You are what you're writing about, you know, for that period of time.

So if you turned a corner from comedy into geopolitical autobiographical ruminations? You know, there is not humor in this story, but there are maybe three stories in my book that have, you know, that are kind of devoid of humor. although there is some lightness. There is some lightness. Dark humor, you say. Well, on that note, I'm happy to report that as far as we know, Ed Betts is still with us, and I hope he will be for many years to come. I hope so.

I'm sure he will. He's a vibrant man. He really is. Excellent. And nice. How did Dad do in the shuffleboard finals? I think they came in second. That is 79.

Well, no. There are four different divisions in the league. In his division, he came in second. Okay. All right. Well, it's important to have goals. But overall, I don't know. I guess they have to count up the points.

Oh, but Dad was, oh, he was highlighted in this latest newsletter. Not like Ed Betts. He got. Ed Betts was highlighted too. That's not the kind of highlighting. We need. No. He got 11 points in one turn. That's pretty good.

11 points. How do you do that? That's three. He must have had a hanger. Yeah. He must have two hangers and a three. He must have. Yeah.

That's a big slide. Well, I guess there are a lot of different ways you could do it. No, there's a, that's the only way you can do it. 11 points, 4, 4, and 3. I might make a sign for him to carry. No, that would be. Yeah. That's exactly what he needs to be walking around.

with a sign, like a sandwich board around his neck saying, I go to 11. 11 points. I know. Well, yeah, he ought to go up to that woman who has seven stents and say, do you have 11 points on the shovel? Right. And at that, I think it's probably time to say goodbye, isn't it? I think it is, Mom. You have a great dinner.

Say hi to dad. Okay. And we'll do this again in a month or so, or sooner if you want, something fascinating. happens. All right, love you. Okay, guys. Nice to see you. Nice to be with you again. Same here. Oh, bye. Bye. All right, bye.

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