The Weekly Planet - 246 Princess Leia Returns & Harry Potter 3 & 4

Episode Date: August 6, 2018

Visit https://www.harrys.com/weeklyplanet for a free trial set. (of razors!)Hello and welcome to a podcast. This week we talk the Venom trailer, expanding the Sony Non Spider-man Spider-man Universe, the return of Sarah Connor, Alf and Picard, Guardians 3 director, Star Wars 9 casting and The Batman. Plus we discuss both Harry Potter’s three and four. Thanks for listening!Prime Mates Podcast: https://goo.gl/EdcRnB0:00 The Start1:23 Venom Trailer5:15 Kraven The Hunter movie9:07 Picard returns15:40 Alf is back18:35 Terminator 5 photo20:25 James Gunn fired forever21:25 Star Wars 9 casting29:03 The Batman movie news34:17 Harry Potter 3 & 4 (spoilers for all books/movies)1:41:13 What We Reading/What We Gonna Read1:47:31 Letters It’s Time For LettersBuy the Harry Potter Collection on Amazon: https://amzn.to/2nenOWHThe Weekly Planet YouTube Channel: https://goo.gl/1ZQFGHFind our T-Shirts here: https://www.teepublic.com/stores/mr-sunday-movies Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Register today at sunrisechallenge.ca. That's sunrisechallenge.ca. This podcast is part of the Planet Broadcasting Network. Visit planetbroadcasting.com for more podcasts from our great mates. This episode is brought to you by Harry's Razors. Any day of the week. Is that their slogan? Yeah, schwing. Any day of the week is that there yeah swing any day of the week okay to the show welcome back everybody to another episode of the weekly planet where we

talk movies we talk comics we talk TV, we talk trailers that aren't good. My name is James, also known as Mr. Sunday. With me as always is my co-host Nick Mason. Whoa, whoa, whoa, it's magic, you know. Never believe it's not so. Very good. Thank you. What's the occasion?

Nah, nothing. Just that I'd sing again. Great. Just that I'd sing again great just that I'd sing again it has been a while hasn't it yeah that's right yeah

now we're going to talk about Harry Potter we're doing Harry Potter I looked at the last time we did a Harry Potter episode it was two years ago wow yeah we left it that long

exactly I don't know okay what do you want you want more information than that do you yes it'll probably be about

two years okay exactly maybe a bit shy of it'll be about two years exactly we get requested that Maybe a bit shy of. It'd be about two years. Exactly. We get requested that every week. That's true.

And every week I'm like, and then we didn't have a topic this weekend. And we're like, let's do it. Yeah. And you know, we'll get to that. Cause we're going to talk about the venom trailer up top.

Yep. I'm very excited for how this is going to sink the universe immediately. What are you excited for about it? Okay. Here's what I shouldn't say that it could be fine. Sorry. Go on. here's what I liked about it. I shouldn't say that. It could be fine. Sorry, go on. Here's what I liked about it. Didn't look good, though.

Sorry, go on. If you'd let me get a word in, didn't look good. No, I'm kidding. Look, I like the fact that we've finally got an on-screen Venom that looks really big. Yes. That's more Ultimate Venom as well.

Ultimate Venom is huge. Yeah, yeah. We didn't get little weedy Topher Grace Venom, etc. Yeah. Yeah. And we didn't get Little Weedy Topher Grace Yes. Venom, etc. Yeah. I tell you what like whether you like

the look of it or not it looks a lot better than it sounds because I couldn't understand a gold darn thing that he was saying. Yeah. Does he call somebody

a turd at one point? He says I'm going to bite your face and your arms and legs off and you're going to roll down the street like a turd in the wind. Alright.

Yeah. Yeah. I did a trailer breakdown. Mitch helped with the editing cause I was away. Thanks Mitch. Yeah. Thanks Mitch. I think that's,

I think they're looking at this as in a Deadpool kind of way. It's got a fun little stinger on the end and this is a, he's a bit rude. He's a bit rude. You know what I mean? He's, he's doing some jokes and he's what's with just Tom Hardy's general accent in this though. It's what's with, what'sy's general accent in this though it's what's with

what's with hollywood's obsession with a yeah putting tom hardy in some sort of mask or helmet yeah for most of a movie so we can't understand so we can't see him and what's with he's already had one movie where it was an absolute disaster for his for understanding him yes and they had to redouble the dialogue giving him a weird voice yeah go straight back into that yeah thinking i think it's not only you know you said you couldn't really understand the venom voice i think it's the mouth because you can't lip read it the way that you would normally i think that's true that may be an element of it but they'll probably they'll probably redub the dialogue because that is his voice and they

kind of tweak it i think initially they got somebody else, and then they changed it. Yeah, I think I heard that as well. Look, I thought the last trailer looked really good, and then this one I'm like, oh, no. Really? Interesting. Yeah. Okay, I actually don't mind this one. I think it looks fun.

I think a lot of it looks kind of unfinished, and look, it's not out until October or something like that, so there's a very good chance. But it just looks like, and then he fights an evil Venom and he's trying to get, put all the toxin into the water. And it looks like that because he's like, the universe is a virus and I'm the cure. I'm, you know, I bet it's all that.

I'll be honest. I was not paying attention to any element of the plot in this trailer. I was just waiting to see what Venom looked like. And he looked all right. He did look all right. What about, so there's going to be other symbiotote symbiote is it is it anti-venom is that no it's um toxin no it's it's not there's like six of them it's from an early venom spider-man comic he is it's like void or something it's in my video i don't know i'll link it below riot

that's his name because there was there was a of... Because apparently each symbiote, symbiote, depending how you say it. How do you say it? I say symbiote, symbiote. Yeah, that's what I say too. Sim-sim for short. Yeah, Sim-sim. But they've got five seeds in them.

Sim-sim seeds. Sim-sim seeds. And they take them out and they make these five other symbiote, symbiote. Oh, they have like five eggs. Something like that, yeah. Okay, so Venom only has a limited time to have kids before he becomes like a withered old crone.

That's right, exactly, yeah. So I think there's going to be others. I don't think it's going to be just him. I cannot wait for that CGI explosion. Yeah, it should be good. But I think it's just going to... Six CGI masses of weird black spaghetti running at each other.

Yeah, it's just going to be goo and just hitting each other, and I just don't... There's a final shot in the trailer where you see... Where they're both in the suits? Yes, and the villain takes a swing at Venom and takes the head off, but he's not in the head. Yeah.

That looked cool. Yeah, I agree. There's moments of it that look fine, but... Boy, if you like tendrils, flip in trucks as well. And you know I do yes you do well on the back of that also sony have uh i don't know if they announced this but it's it's been revealed that they're also working on a craven the hunter spin-off for this not an odd choice especially for a spider-man specific he's so smart i was so venom but craven is again his main goal when he shows up is to kill

spider-man at least venom fights other symbiotes and goes into space yeah and does all kinds of crazy stuff craven cut off half his head and there's still a man in there exactly craven is just a guy yes who wants to kill spider-man for the most part who's he gonna kill in this venom oh yeah oh i just think this is all, this is Sony all over. Yeah, for sure. This is just, it's another crack at a cinematic universe. They're putting the cart before the horse. Yeah.

Other metaphors about being shit at filmmaking. You know what I'm talking about. You know, that metaphor of the dark universe. The dark universe. Yeah. I don't know. Look, I could be wrong. I could very well be wrong.

But this, I think at best best this is going to be okay and I think if you're kicking off a universe that's not good enough yeah yeah who's he fighting I don't

you get me yeah you get stuff I just mean all of them I've not what are they doing for any of these who is he fighting

I guess it would have to be Venom or but that's the thing I don't think it is I think he's just maybe they're just going to introduce some generic superpowered or non-superpowered characters.

Yes. Also, he's a villain. Yes. You know? He's got no redeeming features. He hunts humans for sport. Well... He killed that lion.

He cut it in half. He cut it in half. He cut its face in half and wears it as a vest. I don't like that. I don't like his attitude. He'd be on Twitter nowadays. People would be like... Ricky Gervais would be like, I disapprove of this i'm better than everybody i'm rickie gervais yeah

you know it but uh yeah apparently these they are going for a darker tone of this universe in general i don't know if you'd notice that from the venom trailer but apparently the reason they're able to put villains so many villains in the venom movie is because there's no heroes like yeah that that's how that works you just put no heroes and you stack it with villains. Yeah, that sounds... That's what I'm talking about. Like, you don't give me a Kraven movie unless he's fought Spider-Man and he's been defeated and then it's his journey of either redemption or coming back on top or something.

Well, no. Okay, then. Cool. Well, they aren't going to give me what i want so no definitely which is not a craven movie i guess that's what i want i would love to see craven in a spider-man movie yeah for sure i think that would be a good fit so look i think this is less and less likely that it's going to join up with the mcu anyway i think all these characters are probably going to be handed over in a few years because when this is avi arad and amy pascal i think who run the rest

of the universes into the ground except for the new spider-man one so terrific great i'm really excited are you excited yes craven it would be a good craven someone said henry cavill no he's not he's not jungle enough he's not jungle enough? He's not jungle enough, yeah. What about a Joe Manganiello? Is he jungle enough? No. I think swarthier. He needs to be swarthier. Like a what?

Give me an example. Like a... I mean, from a person in our life. Yeah, like one of our personal real-life friends. I want this just to reference a video. Javier Bardem. Okay. That's a good choice.

Thank you. Is he ripped enough? Is he ripped? I have no idea. I don't think he would be He's got a big Easter Island head I know that about him But a lot of Craven is shirtless stuff

It's a lot of vests and Lion capes and whatever Body double him, it's fine Okay What about Vincent Cassell? Who's he? He's too French He's the fox in Oceans 12

And 13 He is too French That's a bit out of the box I don't mind that Yeah He'd be more of a, some sort of rat man. The Rat King.

Yeah. It could be the Rat King. And you could keep him French. That's true. Yeah. Don't you think? You just say Le Rat King. Le Rat Royale.

Yeah. All that's good stuff. Thank you. This is exciting. Genuinely. Jean-Luc. I think it's interesting that we have to qualify when we say, this is exciting.

Nah, tricked ya. It's not. It's not, but this is. This is. Patrick Stewart is coming back as Jean-Luc Picard, 20 years after, it's set 20 years after the last episode of Next Generation. There are no scripts written at this point. Picard H20.

That's right. There's no scripts written, so it's Picard H20. That's right. There's no scripts written, so it's a fair way off. Because they're talking about building a whole lot of new Star Trek shows for TBS? I was going to say TBS. That would also be my guess.

Yeah. And there's also, he's hinted at, because he came out on stage at TrekkerCon or whatever was going on. And he said also, he might not be a captain

at this point. Maybe he's marooned on an island and somebody goes to get him back and then he doesn't want him, but then he comes back as a hologram and then he dies. Would you like that? A dead hologram. Yes.

No. Okay. Fair enough. I think this is great though. I think it's good that they're moving because they haven't really moved that old universe forward. It's not the old universe. No, we're sort of stuck at what was the last one?

Star Trek 9? Nemesis. Yeah, the one with Tom Hardy. Yeah. Was that Nemesis? Nemesis was the one where Picard fought his clone. Yeah, I think that was the last one. And that was like 2002 or 2003 or something.

It was very unwell received. It was underwhelming, that one. Yeah. But Picard also showed up in other series, didn't he? Did he? Yeah, I think he showed up in like otheres didn't he did he yeah i think he showed up in like other ones really you know what i mean give me an example uh do you mean his series do you mean his series blunt talk yes he showed up no he showed i think he showed i think picard

was in the first episode of deep space nine didn't show up in other stuff like during he wouldn't have been in enterprise but no i'm sure he was in other stuff i feel confident he was not he did the hand in the first episode of Deep Space Nine the Enterprise shows up at Deep Space Nine he does the handover yeah

I thought they leave Worf or Worf hangs around later or something no Worf appears in like season two or three I think okay right gotcha yeah yeah great good stuff any other

questions about a series I vaguely remember oh boy do I have the Dominion okay what's that Odo is the Borg dead no they're all All about the place Are they?

Aren't they nice now When some work on a ship? No Isn't there like Some people with Borg parts Or whatever? There's some people with Borg parts And they're like

Look I've got Borg parts You just need to accept that Alright? Yeah Okay good Yeah Remember when It's me

Ernest Borg parts Do you remember the movie Famous character actor Ernest Borg parts Do you remember First Contact Where the Borg was in a big old Borg sphere? Yes.

Or a cube. They were in a cube, but then they dropped the cube. Yeah, I remember. Crazy, right? Yeah, right? What was in the sphere? We know, that's what I'm saying! Maybe a little pyramid.

A trapezoid. We don't know. We don't know. Yeah. Should have been all the way down. They should have done all the shapes. Inside that Russian doll. Yes, in the very centre. I think... Well, this is the era of bringing back stuff isn't it we're well

into it i mean we're going to talk about terminator in a bit and i think you know the people who were fans of these series from years back and now at an age where they want to see him again and there's enough of a break where it's not naff like imagine if they had kept making this and then they're like ricard's back in another series. I'm like, well, he's been making this for 15 years. Yeah, for sure. Anyway, who cares? Since then,

he's been Professor X. He's been Blunt Talk. He's been Blunt Talk. He's been some other people. He's definitely been some other people. There's no doubt. I don't know if I'm on board.

He narrates the movie Ted or something. Oh, yeah, that's right. I've done off... I don't know. I would kind of... Do you think he should... Do you think he'll have...

Do you think he'll have evolved as a character? Yes. Do you think he'll have mellowed should do you think he'll have do you think he'll have evolved as a character do you think he'll have mellowed or do you think he'll have gone mad perhaps they say the only bit of information

is that he's not a captain right or he might not be a captain so he could have moved up he could have moved up he could have moved down yeah

could have quit the biz could have quit the biz maybe he has a sandwich van he could have a sandwich van that sounds exciting let's watch that is that what's in the middle of the cube it's a sandwich van it's a sandwich van. He could have a sandwich van. That sounds exciting. Let's watch that. Is that what's in the middle of the cube?

It's a sandwich van. It's a sandwich van. Okay, good. And he's done it up. He's done it up. Well, you should. You need to for space. Do I have any other thoughts about this?

Probably. I've got heaps of thoughts. I guess that means I'll bring back Riker and Data and whatever. Data's tricky because... What if they're all dead, though? That'd be great. Yeah, see? But also you could bring him back with time travel or whatever.

That's true. That would be great. That would be great also. Well, what's his name reicher what's the actor he does a lot of star trek directing and writing that's true yeah so it wouldn't be wouldn't surprise me if he has a hand in this or even shows up what's your ideal jean-luc picard return scenario assuming you have one you don't have to have one i'm kind of sick of burnt out You're not what you used to be kind of guy I wouldn't mind He's retired and happy and he's forced to come back in

As opposed to like The universe has changed and I've changed too Fuck you, no Can't you just be well adjusted I was going to say I wouldn't mind marooned in his back But that was kind of the plot of Star Trek VII. And The Last Jedi.

Yeah, it was also The Last Jedi. Yeah. Did you ever read the Kirk novels written by William Shatner? Do you think I ever read them? Maybe. This is a good point. What do you think, Mason? Because I did.

I know you did. I think we've talked about them here before. They're fan fiction, aren't they yeah they're fan fiction they're fan fiction written by william shatton or ghostwritten i don't know yeah that where because at the end of seven he sacrifices himself he's crushed by crushed by a bridge or a girder or something exactly to save everybody else but then i i can't remember the i was gonna look it up the other day because it just came to my mind but i didn't get a chance but in there's a sequel novel that he wrote to star Trek Generations

where he's still alive for some reason. Does he get young again? Yeah, I think he does. He gets young and hot again and he's banging broads and doing detective stuff. So he's just working at his other show. Yeah. That's great.

He's just TJ Hooker or Tech War or whoever. I'm going to look it up. I'm going to give you updates later. I don't mind. Okay. That dude has gone mad. Oh, yeah. I mean, he went mad a while ago.

He wears a piece, right? That's the rumor, is that right? Yeah. Probably any number of pieces, depending on what you're referring to there. See, that's what I like about Picard as well. You know what I mean? He just embraced it.

That's true. Yeah. I think, was there some test footage where he wasn't bald originally? I think maybe they tried him with a wig. I know they have flashback episodes or they show like a picture of him when he's younger and he's got hair.

But yeah. Shatnerverse series by William Shatner. It's a series. There's also a novel called Shatnerquake, but I don't think he wrote it. Is it related to? No, no, no. It's part of the Shatnerverse.. It's part of the Shatnerverse. It's all part of the Shatnerverse. Yeah.

I'll get back to you. We'll do some more news and I'll give you some excerpts from Wikipedia about the Shatnerverse. We probably don't need to talk about this too long, but it just ties into everything's coming back. Shut up, everybody, because everything's coming back.

There's an elf reboot in the works. I don't care about that. Didn't the dad turn out to be really racist or something in real life? Yeah, look, I don't want to make any presumptions because I don't care about that. Didn't the dad turn out to be really racist or something in real life? Yeah, look, I don't want to make any presumptions because I can't remember. Let's just assume he was really racist. Okay. Because that's the least worst thing. Yeah, it's

true. Is it though? Do you want to Google the dad from ALF and see what happens? In the meantime, the novel, The Return, begins on the planet Viridian III and takes place shortly after the events seen in the motion picture Star Trek Generations.

The body of James T. Kirk is stolen by the Romulans after his burial. Using alien technology, the Borg bring Kirk back to life and his cartra is restored, but false memories are implanted to turn him against the Federation. He bangs some broads. Okay, that's good.

So many broads. He resists commands to kill Worf Dator and Geordie LaForge. That's classic him, isn't it? Isn't it, though? Yeah, because he's just that tough. Kirk is eventually captured on Deep Space Nine. Oh, he's bringing it all together.

This guy's killing it. Oh, he's medieval. I wonder who he is now. Probably. I mean, he hasn't been born yet, technically. Okay, I was wrong about the racism. Okay. Former elf star, Max Wright,

an outcast after gay porn and crack smoking past exposed. See the photos 25 years later. No thank you. Probably give that a miss. So there you go. What else is going on in the Shatnerverse? They take a Defiant Class starship. They rename it the Enterprise. He captains the ship.

They go to the Borg homeworld. He captains the ship. Yep. They go to the Borg homeworld. Once there, the Enterprise neutralizes the Borg Romulan fleet around the planet with a wave. Hello! Hey, guys! Stop! All right.

It's the magic word. And then he sacrifices himself again. Wow, so he's dead again. No, I think he's alive in the next one. Because he's a clone or something? Yeah, I don't know. God, he's the best, isn't he? Shortly after the release of Star Trek Generations,

William Shatner pitched the story of Kirk being brought back to life by the Borg for the next Star Trek film. Nice. While Paramount was interested in using the Borg for the next movie, they did, they also felt the torch had been passed. Yeah. They dropped a fucking bridge on him. They dropped a bridge on him.

It was well and truly Passed Yeah Anyway I wonder if he'll ever come back in a series He'll have to right? Kirk Yeah In one of the nine Star Trek

William Shatner Yeah They got planned They've tried Apparently tried to work him into The new movies But they haven't really found a good Opportunity

I think it's also because he looks Nothing like Chris Pine It would be weird So you look You look at Zachary Quinto and... Chris Pine. No, Leonard Nimoy. Oh yeah, they look pretty much the same. They look like the same person.

Yeah, for sure. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But yeah, I just think it might be a weird disconnect. Also, Shatner isn't a very good actor. And I would never say that to his face. But he isn't. He's not here though, is he?

No, he's not here. So we can say it all we like but good on him he's killing it uh speaking of things that are coming back forever god all right um we should have some sort of confetti cannon for any time we get some news of a new thing and we just shoot it up our nose yes uh terminator 6 got its first cast photo a lot of people aren't sold on this And I'm not particularly either It's not a great photo

But Linda Hamilton She's back Looks great Yep, agreed Do you think maybe that's the element of these movies that are missing She does have like suburban mom hair Yeah man It's got that blonde with the dark roots in it

Yeah, yeah, looks good I just, that's Yeah, do you think she might be the missing element to making these movies good again yeah i think so yeah yeah you think so i know so i know so yeah people also shooting on this photo because they're like it looks kind of generic do you remember the photos from terminator genesis where they're standing on a runway and they're just firing guns at nothing do you remember those so it's better than that it sure is i think she's got an intensity it works with these movies

definitely yeah so I think if this was just three people then none of them were her I think

this would be or another picture of Arnold because like well we've seen him he's been in the last two or three or whatever

how many was he in was he in yeah he was in he was in three he wasn't in four but he was in five is that right yes

but he was technically in four yes he was in three. He wasn't in four, but he was in five. Is that right? Yes. But he was technically in four. Yes, he was a CGI face or whatever. Do you think this is going to be good? Who's directing it again? Tim Miller, Deadpool. He's also done a lot of other stuff. Yeah, I'm on board with this. Okay.

Yep. All right. It'll be at least fine. Yeah. It'll be better than five. It's also doing that thing of ignoring all the continuity of the ALF telemovie. Dark, terrific. Which is good.

Where ALF was executed by the government. Was that what happened? He was captured. He was captured, yeah. Good on him. It looks like Disney, this is according to Variety, so it looks like it's probably fairly likely. They're not going to hire back James Gunn.

That kind of stuff is indefensible and it's not happening. I'm not particularly surprised. Regardless of what you think about the situation, they're well within their rights to fire him and they're well within their rights to not bring him back. Yeah, and also I think there'd be a mindset of, well, if we made a decision initially

and if we caved due to external pressure yeah then people are never going to stop chipping away at us with everything yeah that's right like bring back this franchise yeah fire this guy whatever like every it'll just be a constant barrage of that and i think they're like we don't want to look weak yeah though it could be it might be interesting because the cast came out with a letter defending him. Who knows? Are some of them not going to then be involved in the new one? Apparently, they're looking at new directors, but apparently it's not familiar faces in terms of people in the franchise.

People are saying Taika Waititi, but I don't think any of those guys would do it. They seem like they're all friendly enough where it'd be like, it feels weird. Stepping on other people's toes. Yeah. And again, I also think, and I think maybe we mentioned this last time, I feel like it's, they

feel like the Guardians formula has been set in stone now. Yes. They don't need James Gunn. Just put a cool, jazzy soundtrack. Exactly. Which I think they might be surprised. It might not be as easy to replicate as they think. Agreed, yeah. But we'll see how that plays out. Now, Mason, you had a bloody cracking week last week.

Did I? Because there was no Star Wars news. But I'm happy to report... Oh, no. It's back again this week. Star Wars. There actually was Star Wars news, but because we recorded so early... We didn't get a chance to put in Star Wars news.

Yeah. It felt like a vacation. It did, didn't it? For you. I was sad. So they announced the cast that news yeah it felt like a vacation didn't it for you I was sad so they announced the cast that's returning it's a lot of

familiar faces you got your Adam Driver and your Daisy Ridley and your John Boyega's and whatever and Mark Hamill's

coming back as well which is which means Luke Skywalker's coming back from the dead yay or they could be

doing flashbacks because people are like why didn't Luke do a flip or whatever so maybe they'll do a flip do a flip in the past do you want to see him do a flip?

yes there'll be a flash, Kylo Ren will remember his time in the Jedi temple in the training grounds be like, now Kylo watch me do a flip now you do a flip, your flip wasn't as good kylo i swear revenge yeah that'd be great yeah uh the other thing they mentioned was billy d williams is

returning to the franchise which a lot of people are excited for he's like 81 as well so i can't imagine we're going to get a lot of billy running about. But there's talk of him getting back in shape and showing up again. So, yeah. He's been walking every day. Every day of the week. What do you think of Billy Dee coming back? What do you think they're going to be doing with him? Also, do you know his real name?

I'll look this up. His real name is William December Williams. That's pretty great. Isn't it just? Yes. Is it better than Billy Dee Williams? Because I don't think it is. No, I think Billy Dee is better.

Yeah. William December. Oh, actually, wait. Willie December. Because I had an epiphany. I'm like, Billy Dee? Is his name William Williams?

Well, it's Willie Williams. Yeah. I like Willie Williams. Willie Williams. It's not cool though, is it? No. But not, Billy Dee isn't cool either.

I think it is cool. All right. Wow. I agree to disagree. Oh, you? No. But not Billy Dee isn't cool either. I think it is cool. All right. Wow. I agree to disagree. Wow. You're wrong. Maybe I've just, because I'm so, I've always had Billy Dee in my life. Yeah, yeah.

Sure. Maybe that's just kind of. Because he's your uncle. He's my uncle, yeah. Mine's Javier Bardem, obviously. Is that true? Yeah. Wow.

Your uncle's got a huge face. I know. Suave. But yeah, what do you think he's got? I would have gone with December Williams, I think, if I was choosing a stage name. I think it sounds a bit too pornographic. Does it?

Yeah. All right. You know, like it's not a real name. Yeah. It doesn't sound like a real name. Exclusively Christmas porn? Yeah. Okay, all right.

Exclusively, yeah. Wow, all right. Yeah. What, yeah, how do you think they're going to use him in this? Minimally. Yeah, right? Maybe they just go to where he's been holding up and he gives them some advice.

He gives them some guns and some advice. Yeah. Yeah, fair enough. I think it's very much going to be... Because I don't think you could go... I don't think you could take an 81-year-old man, especially like the glamorous Lando Calrissian, and be like, he's still smuggling.

He's still just he's still, you know, just barely scraping by. Cause he never really, I mean, he was in the solo movie, but he kind of got it together and he, it was a, it was a competent businessman.

And then he, he was forced into rebellion. I think they could definitely go back to cloud city. Yeah. Okay. And I think if they want to recover some of the fans that they lost with the last Jedi, I think a return to something recover some of the fans that they lost with The Last Jedi, I think a return to something familiar would work quite well.

So maybe they go back to Cloud City and he's just like, here I am and everything's still great in Cloud City. And I've betrayed you all again. Oh, what? Darth Vader's back. He thought he was dead. He's not. Look at him do a flip.

No, you do a flip. Your flip wasn't as good. But yeah, that's very possible. I think we're probably going to get some old locations in this one. Because I don't think... Have we seen any existing locations in the new ones? I don't think we have. No.

We've seen new locations that look surprisingly similar to old locations. If I see Tatooine, I'm going to shoot myself. In a good way or a bad way? No, in a way that you put a desert planet in the first one, we've seen enough of Tatooine, what's there? Nothing. There's fuck all there. There's no one there. Everyone from the past there is probably dead.

We don't need to go back. I would love to see Tatooine back just to see people who hated the desert planet in the first one just go bananas over Oh my god, Tatooine's back this is so exciting but it's not though is it that's what i'm saying it was exciting mental gymnastics that people would have to go through yeah to be like i hated this desert planet but i love this desert

yeah it was exciting for i guess technically for the for the two minutes that pod racer went pod race went for yeah and then skip forward years, and it was exciting when Stormtroopers killed Luke's family, and then nothing else happened in between. That's so true. And also, if they're doing the Obi-Wan movie, that's enough Tatooine, don't you think? Yep. But the other bit of news that came out of this, though,

was Carrie Fisher is going to be back using archival footage from Episode 7, and there's also rumours that they're going to be using footage from Episode 8. Apparently, the role might be more substantial than you think. I think if they're going to be using footage from episode 8. Apparently the role might be more substantial than you think. I think if you're going to bring her back, we've talked about how they probably

just kill her off off screen, but I think this is a, I think that might keep her alive in the universe. I think that's a good idea. Kind of like Paul Walker's out there in Fast and Furious world. Yeah. What were you going to say though?

I was going to say, maybe, yeah, I mean, maybe they say she's been injured or something and then she's like okay well i'm taking a backhand roll everybody i'll be over on this planet yeah right so i'm still around but you're not gonna see me i'm here if you need me but you won't see me don't worry about it the plot will not require you to need me i'm i'm thinking about how i'm sure there's unused scenes of her talking about the first order being like the first order is a master great army or whatever I'm sure they can just and then just stand somebody else in front of her Carrie just riff about the first order yeah just give us some look there's a lot

of them they got a laser planet uh what do you want I'm not tons of lasers not a fan yeah yeah I'm gonna do this flip Carrie. We're not assured for this. Yeah, but... That was a good flip. Yeah. So I guess also they're going to have to CGI new clothes on her. Because you can't go back to the general's clothes. That's true, yeah.

But clothes aren't particularly hard to CGI change, I'd imagine, compared to a whole human face. Anyway, I'm glad they're not doing a CGI person. Agreed. I think this is a good way to a whole human face. Anyway, I'm glad they're not doing a CGI person. Agreed. I think this is a good way to do it. Yeah. You know, it might work out really well. Sometimes it does.

Sometimes it doesn't. We've actually got a video coming up this week, Mason, where we're talking about all the different times that people were brought back from the dead in cinema. Oh, that was great. Yeah. We haven't recorded it yet. We haven't recorded it yet.

But let me tell you, it's going to be one of the best. Pretty good. If not the best. It would be fascinating to be the writer in the room where they're like, here's all the archival footage of Carrie Fisher we didn't use. Build a plot out of it. Yeah, right. Wild, right?

Can you use this flip that she did? We didn't think she could do it. But she did it. She surprised us all, if we're honest. Yeah. Can you somehow put together some sort of circus storyline where she leaves to join the circus because of her incredible flip abilities? I would love that.

It would make my day. Last bit of news, Mason. Matt Reeves has said there was a rumor this week that his Batman movie is based off year one, and everyone was like, ugh. But apparently it's not. It is noir-driven, and affleck is not officially out but there was also a rumor that he is he's going to jump ship and also if it's it's a prequel which it said that it might be but it's in the same universe

they'll probably use a different just make anything at this point just get an old 1960s batman tv show script and film that again. Just film it exactly as it was. You want Egghead? Put King Tut in it. Egghead? Yes, Egghead and King Tut. Egghead and King Tut. That's right.

The double act. Name a more iconic duo, Mason. Louis the Lilac. Yep. And it's another terrible 1960s Batman villain. Egghead. Egghead again. Egghead's in it again.

Great. Yeah, I think I saw three different articles this week that were variously Affleck is Egghead Egghead again Egghead's in it again Great Yeah I think I saw Three different articles This week That were variously Affleck is in And now he's out He's definitely in

But is he out? Yes Yes Oh god Just do something Yeah Make a move Or don't

Just do this forever That's fine also Yeah Good stuff Alright Mason We've got to do an ad Do you mind? Actually before you do an ad Oh no. I was in an

episode of our friend Matt Stewart's podcast Primates. Which is a podcast where he talks about all the primates, chimps, monkeys, gorillas, etc. in popular culture. And I was on the most recent episode where we talked about the film Dunstan Checks In. Had you ever seen that film before? He'd seen it for the first time

He saw it for the first time as a child. I saw it for the first time the day before we recorded the episode. What did you think of it? Didn't hate it. Really? It's not good. Nah, well, they never are, are they? No, they're really quite bad.

Yeah, yeah, okay, fair enough. It features the great Jason Alexander from Seinfeld. Yeah, is he? Features a... But he's not like a squirrelly bank teller or something. No. Isn't he like a dad or something? He's a fairly charming dad hotel manager.

I don't understand. No, I don't. I'm playing against time. Are you sure? Yeah, I'm very sure. Did you guys watch a different movie? No, we watched the same movie. Did you guys watch The Concierge?

Didn't watch The Concierge, yeah. Okay, it's Michael J. Fox. Cool. Pretty good. Anyway, it was really good fun. And if you go back, there's maybe four or five other episodes. Yes. There's one with Jess Perkins. There's one with Annie Matthews. There's one with Alistair Trombley a there's maybe i think there's maybe four or five other episodes and then yes there's one with jess perkins there's one with annie matthews there's one with alice trombley birch i think there's one with dave warnerkeen

all those people are delightful uh claire and i actually recorded one which should be coming up soon as a duo is it about some sort of monkey family no is it what was it no it is it is about a monkey family that's what i thought he knows how to pick him it's not a monkey family though oh actually i think think Claire picked it. Anyway, the most important thing is the thing that you said. Thank you. Will you rise with the sun to help change mental health care forever? Join the Sunrise Challenge to raise funds for CAMH,

the Centre for Addiction and Mental Health, to support life-saving progress in mental health care. From May 27th to 31st, people across Canada will rise together and show those living with mental illness and addiction that they're not alone. Help CAMH build a future where no one is left behind. So, who will you rise for? Register today at sunrisechallenge.ca. That's sunrisechallenge.ca. Mason, I know you love Harry's Races. I need you to know that I know that.

That's important to me. Wait. It's important to you that I know that you know that I love Harry's Races. That you love Harry's Races. Well, I do, so you're right. Good. Excellent. Harry's, they stand behind the quality of their blades because they know that switching razors,

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Five blade razor with a lubricating strip and trimmer blade. Rich lathering shave gel. Trimmer blade cover. You are really getting into it this week and I appreciate it. Listeners of the show can redeem their trial set at harrys.com slash weekly planet. Make sure you go to harrys.com slash weekly planet to redeem your offer and let them know that we sent you to help support the show. So let them know that we sent you to help support.

So you know, so they know that you support our show. Thank you. That's important to us. Yes. Very good. Go hard or go home. Yeah. Mason, we mentioned up top, we sang a song. You were here. I was there. That was your doing. Thank you. That's important to us. Yes. Very good. Go hard or go home. Yeah. Mason, we mentioned up top, we sang a song.

You were here. I was there. That was your doing. Thank you. Well done. Then we're going to talk about Harry Potter this week. Yes. Because two years ago, to the very day.

Wow. Yep. What an incredible coincidence. I think so. If anything, it's a little magical. Is it? Yeah. I think it's a coincidence.

Okay. But. It's not even exact. It's not. It's probably a few months off, if anything. But we did an episode on the two first Harry Potter films leading up to Fantastic Beasts. Where are all the beasts? Where are they?

They're in the case. They're in the case. Just don't open the case. You'll be fine. They'll be fine. Come on. They didn't. They did though.

It's pretty basic stuff. It was. Well, I thought so. But this time around, we're up to Harry Potter's three and four. The turning point in the series. It goes from a fun kid affair, Mason. Or a bad kid. All right.

From a fun... How do I word this? There's three bad movies and then they get a bit better at four. Yeah. Well, look, a lot of people say... We'll obviously go three and then four. A lot of people say that three is their favourite film. Also, book.

Because it also takes a dark turn also in the bloody in the series of books. The books that you've never read potentially? I've never read them though. But you've read them all? Read them all. Yeah.

I like them. They're good. Good. Fine. Great. So let's talk about Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban.

Full spoilers for this movie that came out in 2004 I want to say. Yep. They were churning these out mate. One a year? Yeah something like that. I think they did

2001, 2002 because you don't know if the kids are going to become ugly yeah alright well that was I was reading the trivia on some of these

and that was one of the directors for I think it was four was like I was really surprised the kids didn't get ugly or didn't get mean I was also surprised by that yeah right

yeah because they're rich they're rich they're rich and famous they do one and then you're fine yeah right so this movie

what's the story do I have to ask you that for this no I don't think you do okay fair enough let's discern the story together sure let's

ah look well okay well let's again like the first two it starts with Harry yes being miserable

at the Dursley's house yeah which again if these movies have taught me anything it's nobody cuts Harryry any slack and they really should some people do yeah but he's rich well he can't it's gonna say he's rich

but for the most part it's like i mean his parents were murdered yeah and they're all that and he's he's famous because his parents were murdered and he famously hasn't been in the wizard world his whole life. But nobody ever cuts him any slack. In this one, he's like, I'm leaving. I'm never coming back. And he sits on the street. And then the bus comes and picks him up. And he's like, what's this?

And they're like, it's the night bus, Harry, you moron. How could you not know it's the night bus? Because he lives in the real world. He's never seen it before. Why are you so mean to him? You know? Yeah, absolutely. You're right.

Do they know it was Harry Potter? They already know it's Harry Potter. Okay, because in the book, he doesn't tell them it's Harry Potter or something. But he looks like Harry Potter. But yeah, it's still weird, though, the way that... What I noticed about this movie in general, it really takes a turn visually,

which I think for the better, because everything looks like shit just rickety and nothing kind of fits together properly like a set of stairs doesn't line up properly all the clothes are garbage everybody's everybody looks miserable i was gonna say everybody looks like all the teens are just like dirty and all their all their collars are askew and like well apparently greasy old dirty shirt yeah apparently that's intentional yeah well that's intentional apparently the director of this one he uh he was like just alphonse quarrel that's right children of men children of men great movie he was just like just wear your clothes how you would how would you wear you know what i mean if you're if you're a

school kid so i think it kind of i think it works but the first two are very clean cut a lot of it and a lot of it's i think most of it was shot in a soundstage and all that, but this is more kind of real world locations and they did stuff in real castles and all that kind of shit and it shows. It's also weird that in these movies, actually, I don't hate this movie. I think it's overrated

and I think a big part of it is because Daniel Radcliffe in this is a terrible actor. I think he's much better in the next one but why are you saying it's overrated why do you think it's good is it because

Gary Oldman's in it I think maybe that's it but that it's because it's good no I think people give it more credit because Gary Oldman's in it I don't think he's good in this

yeah no exactly he's chewing a lot of sand yeah I mean because it's like he's too we'll get to it but it's like he's too different

we will get to it I'll come back to it but yeah so also they kind of they change the outlay of the school so it makes more sense like it's true to a to the real you know they kind of this is the outlay that they use for the rest of the movies and the and the look because they change the location of the the tree that hits people and about right okay they kind of they kind of move around also they kind of just dismiss how he's just using magic in his room. Because I don't know if you remember from two years ago to the very day, Harry Potter, there's magic used in Harry Potter's house and it's the house elf, Dobby.

You know, the one who dies. He's like, we're best friends. And then he gets stabbed or whatever. But Dobby uses magic and Harry Potter gets expelled. Yeah, right. And in this, it opens with him just using a wand in his room to read a book. And then he curses his aunt with it. No, he does that with his mind or whatever.

Oh, right, okay. Yeah, because he's a powerful lunatic. How's that work? Well, if you remember, do you remember Fantastic Beasts, Where Are The Beasts? Where are they? Where were they? They were in the case, obviously.

Yeah. That dude. Where they should have remained. Yes, I agree. Just don't open the case but what's his name bolkart he's he's a wizard boy and because he was all repressed it comes out in weird and dangerous ways and i believe that's what this is okay right yeah uh-huh is that a function of him not is that a function of him existing in the real world for too long potentially i think it I think it's also just because he's a teenager. He's got a lot of aggression and whatever. It's not really explained.

It's like in the first one, he talks to a snake and then he makes the sheet of glass. Oh, that's right. He can do a bunch of weird shit. But he can never do that when he wants to do it. With a wand, he can. That's what I'm saying. You can't snap his fingers and make someone's head explode. He needs a wand. It's a crutch, if anything. You think so I'm saying, right? Oh, but you can't be like, snap his fingers and make someone's head explode. You need a wand.

Yeah. It's a crutch, if anything. You think so? Mm-hmm. Yeah. It's a bit short for a crutch. Very good. That's me clapping myself, everybody.

It sure is. Just so we're clear. Yeah. So they introduced werewolves to the universe. Yep. Because there's not enough weird shit. Yeah. So.

I remember seeing this one in the cinemas. Yep. And they're like, it's your new defense against the dark ass teacher professor lupin and i went oh he's the werewolf isn't he i don't think they introduced the werewolf at the at that point but i'm like well his name's lupin so he's definitely a werewolf there's a whole lot of hints towards him being a werewolf he's got a big old werewolf scratch across his head when he when they fight the bog, it turns into a moon. His name's Lupin. His name's Lupin. Snape tells everybody that he's a werewolf, pretty much.

Yep. So there's a lot of clues. In the book, he's standard werewolf. Like, he's kind of more wolfish. But here, he's a spindly, sickly werewolf. Yeah, he really is. I don't know if I like it. Maybe that's a British werewolf. Yeah, sure.

Yeah, bad teeth. Spindly and sickly. Yeah. But I think it's... Could do with a bit more vitamin D. werewolf yeah he really i don't know if i like it maybe that's a british werewolf yeah sure yeah bad teeth spindly and sickly yeah but i think it's because he's got a bit more vitamin d yeah absolutely but i think he's i didn't mind it so much this time i think it works in this universe because he's kind of uh this is more in the books but he's much maligned because he's because he was bitten by a werewolf as a kid but like they're second class citizens and he can't get a job and everyone hates him and he doesn't want to have kids and all this kind of shit yeah

people are so mean in this universe and then he gets murdered people are so mean in this universe yeah they are I agree yeah

do you think people should cut everybody some slack yes yeah yeah yeah fair enough

settle down god did you think it was weird that oh except nobody should cut like um Malfoy any slack or the Dursleys

they should kill him they should just get straight up yeah i had a thought malfoy's the little one the young one so painful that kid yeah you know what they should do and that's the thing nobody ever because he's like you won't mess with me because my father's a member and he's a bad guy as well in movies later right yeah he's a he was a bad guy and then he's secretly a bad guy. And he's in league with Voldemort. Not even secretly, but yeah. We'll get to that later.

Yeah. But like, he's always like, you wouldn't kill my family, whatever. What you do, you wait till he's asleep, you put a pillowcase over his head, you get a golden snitch, you put it in the pillowcase, you zip tie it at the neck, and you just leave him for 10 minutes. Just knocks out his eye. Yes. And he bleeds to death.

Yeah. Okay, great. Yeah. And he never knows because you put the pillowcase on his head. That's true. He would never know. Yeah. You know what I find weird about this universe?

You're basically giving every kid a gun. Yeah. And then running around the school. Yeah. And they can all do the curses. You can even just hit someone with a stun curse and they fall off a staircase to their death. Yeah. It's amazing.

I mean, a lot of people do die at the school, but it's amazing more people don't die. Just kids killing kids. Yeah. Maybe there's some kind of enchantment in place, but it seems insane. We may cover some of the same ground that we covered two years ago. Almost certainly.

I feel the point is still valid, that you teach them all these curses and then they just go and become magical accountants. Yes. What's the point is still valid. You teach them all these curses, and then they just go and become magical accountants. Yes. What's the point? Just don't tell them what the curse... But that's the thing, because it's like... They get out anyway.

It's like how you can 3D print a gun. This stuff's got to get to them. Yeah, I guess that's true. But it's like, all the magic is, is you have to say a word and think of something. Yes. That's it. That's all you need to do.

Yeah. And that's... But it's more specific. It's not anything. It's specific stuff. I'm not exactly sure how it works. Also, they can't kill the Dursleys, just so you know, because that's part of the reason Harry Potter is hidden from Voldemort, because he's a blood relation.

He can't be... That's why he has to go back every summer it's like a top up he drinks their blood at night terrific good you okay with that do you love Malfoy's

Nick Carter hair no I hate it I hate everything about him which I guess is a credit to the actor but at the same time but I think but I think it's also

it's it's pretty heavy handed bully stuff it's heavy handed bully stuff and It's pretty heavy-handed bully stuff. It's heavy-handed bully stuff and it doesn't make any sense how there's never any payback to him. Yes. I mean, Hermione punches him at one point. Yeah.

I mean, he does, as the movies go on, he kind of gets more payback. It's weird that he's popular or anybody listens to anything that he says because he's just an idiot. And he's not intimidating or brave or strong or good at magic. He's just a fucking idiot. Well, that's true. It's not like he's the most skilled young wizard. And so he's like, we'll check out the results kind of thing. He's terrible at things.

He's always antagonizing hippogriffs. Yeah, the hypocrite. Yeah, exactly. Exactly, yeah. Would you want to talk about Hagrid? He takes over the magical beast's position and look at all these creatures. And the first thing he does is give them a book that will bite your ear off. They all get one, right?

They all get one, yeah. I just think that's a very strange thing that somebody would make. Yeah. Yeah. I should clarify. I love this universe. that somebody would make. Yeah. Yeah. I should clarify. I love this universe. I love the insanity of it.

You would. But sorry, what were you going to say? I was just going to say, what are they made of? Those books? I think they're just enchanted. Because you can turn a golf ball into a rat. I guess that's true, yeah. So it's whatever.

So these aren't creatures that he's murdered. Maybe. I don't know. I don't think he made the book. I think he just selected it. Yeah, but look, if you had a book made of human skin, it wouldn't be my concern that you didn't make it yourself. The fact that you owned it at all would be cause for concern.

Sure. Also, you basically, the regular Muggle real world equivalent of that is a math book with a rat trap in it. Like that's what you're essentially giving. It's true. Yeah. Giving students. Oh,

we should just, we should, whenever we talk about something magical in this universe, we should attempt to design the human real world equivalent of it. Okay. I love it. Good. Good.

Yeah. So, okay. What's the human equivalent of Dementor Dementors? I guess it's, I think it's just depression. I think that's like, I genuinely, okay, what's the human equivalent of dementors? I guess it's, I think it's just depression. I think that's like, I genuinely... Well, this game isn't as fun as it was 10 seconds ago.

But JK Rowling has said that, you know, she had some dark times. She came from nothing. She, you know, she got divorced and she had no money and she was writing this in a cafe and whatever. And this was kind of a metaphor for the darkest times in her life or whatever. What do you think about them though? I think it's absolutely insane that they put them in a school. That's what I'm talking about.

Because all that, they let them out at all. What's the mechanism? I assume to get, because they need to get Sirius Black back. But there's other people in that prison. Presumably it's also guarded. How many is there? Yeah, exactly. But I mean Send detectives

Don't send these These Insatiable Death monsters That suck out the soul Of anybody's Whose path they You're sending them into

Yeah a kid's school Into a kid's school Also it's not only that It's I mean there's that That'll take your soul Out of your face Yeah

But if you're around one You're just sad So you're putting A really depressing monster in a school for a year full of yeah full of hormonal children who are probably really depressed anyway it's really quite bizarre but you know the other thing you know how uh okay human equivalent a really really depressed security guard he's trigger happy with a sword yeah he's trigger happy uh he's he's a little jumpy he'll shoot at anything but also he's just got a lot of tales about how his wife left him

and how life isn't really worth living and there's 10 of him yeah exactly he's from a big family they all washed out of the police academy and they're all security guards that's it also you know how okay this is fun again this is fun you know how serious black escaped azkaban right i don't know specifically how he did it yeah he changed into a dog or whatever yeah bed sheets i think he changed shouldn't they have known i think you can't because they follow souls or something and i can't remember the specifics no but i mean surely they would have known he had the capability to turn into a frog no they didn't because here's the funny thing oh this better be funny it's pretty funny okay so i'm ready to laugh this is more i'm primed to

laugh so if i don't laugh this is a failing if you're telling it this is more in the books and they talk they do talk about in the movie i think but you know that the marauders map that they get yes which is also an insane thing that we should talk about that displays all the locations of everybody and it says and what they're doing yes Yes. You don't want that in a boarding school. Definitely not. Yeah. But basically, that was made by Harry Potter's dad and that group of friends, like the rat guy, the werewolf man, Sirius Black, and James Potter, who's Harry Potter's dad. And the reason, they can all change into animals because Werewolf Boy was a werewolf

and they wanted to be more kind of close to him. It's a thing. Professor McGonagall, I can't remember the name of it, but she can turn into a cat. But you have to register. These guys. Wait, wait, wait. You have to register what?

Your intent to turn into an animal? No, that you can do it. That it's an ability. And a Magnus, I think it's called. So this isn't a spell. This is you gain the ability to do it all the time. Yeah, it's a transformation. But I think you can only do it into one thing.

Okay. Or maybe, I don't know. And Sirius Black is a frog. No, he's a dog. Oh, okay. I thought you said frog. No, he's a dog. Maybe I said frog.

But they did it illegally. And the punishment for doing that is a lifetime in Azkaban. So he should be there regardless. Yeah, right? Because they knew the rules at the time, right? They knew the rules. A lot of stuff in this universe, the punishment is life imprisonment in Azkaban. Yeah.

Almost anything. Well, not anything. Because sometimes you can just, I don't know. Sometimes you can inflate your aunt to an enormous size like like a helium balloon, and hurl her into space. And that's fine. She nearly knocks out a passenger airliner or whatever. And they're like, no, it's fine. Don't even worry about it.

You get away. There's a lot of Harry Potter getting away with stuff because he's Harry Potter. Yeah, definitely. Yeah, yeah. I don't think there's as much as the previous one. Yeah. But they kind of more pile on him in these movies going forward

there's a new Dumbledore Michael Gambon he's not good I think he's the better of the two I think he's the better of the two but he doesn't got that twinkle in his eye he just seems like a really sad old man in the book there is a sadness to him

because he fell in love with gay wizard Hitler and he accidentally killed his sister or something we'll see it in Fantastic but he's got there's more of a kind of uh gandalf to him and a kind of uh and he's more kind of appearance wise he's more laid back he's got a lot going on but he's really casual and cool and whatever right right yeah there's a great scene in i think it's order of the phoenix where he escapes a room where some auras come to take him away to arrest him he's like you can't take me go fuck yourself and he claps a phoenix and

he disappears and one of the guys is like that dude's fucking awesome so there's there's elements of of it but i've seen that one the order of the phoenix i think it's yeah it's it's better than the book i think it's yeah yeah big call big call so i don't think he's well suited and i think there's it's that's more evident in four which will which we'll talk about in a bit the other okay the other element of this is a time turner which is a device you give to students who want to learn so much that they can travel through time to attend multiple classes presumably aging them at a rate faster than every other student yeah and, and burning them out mentally, I would imagine. Yeah.

And also... What's the equivalent? Ritalin? It's Ritalin, right? It's Ritalin, absolutely. Yeah. But, I mean, don't give... Surely, even in the hands of... Surely a time machine in the hands of even the most unbalanced adult would be better than giving it to a teenager. Yeah, I mean, I'm sure they don't give it to anybody.

Like if Malfoy had to take extra classes. Though, in the play Cursed Child, there's a time turner plays an element. I won't spoil it. There's a time turner plays an element into that, which we'll talk about another day. Just spoil it for me afterwards. I will.

I'm not paying $600 for Cursed Child tickets. Well, you should, Mason. Yeah, I know. Because maybe somebody here did. We'll talk about it later. Emma Thompson turns up in this. Yes. She's good.

She gives spooky premonitions. You know what? She gives a real premonition in this, right? Because you think she's a kook, and she is. Yes, right. But you find out in the later books books it might even be that book no i think it's a later book the dumbledore she went to dumbledore for a job but she's like i can see

the future and he's like that's great we'll get back to you and then just is about to leave she has a she has like one of those weird spooky premonitions and he's like we'll get her in because that might come in handy right okay yeah so but she doesn't know she can do it like she's a liar so but she accidentally has this gift right okay so she doesn't know she can do it Like she's a liar But she accidentally has this gift Right, okay So she isn't a liar then No, she is Because she doesn't know that she can do it

But I guess technically What a fun little twist I think it's her prediction that gets Harry Potter's parents killed Oh Yeah, or something like that Might be her, might be someone else You two aren't gonna die Oh no! Yeah, that's it, might be her, might be someone else. You two aren't going to die.

Oh no! Yeah, that's it. So, the hypocrite. It's an angry dog, horse, bird. Yes, correct. You have to be really respectful, or it will kick you in the head, like a horse, I guess. But if you are respectful, it's your best friend. And you can fly around on it. I would never do that. No. That's so... friend. And you can fly around on it. I would never do that.

No. That's so... Also, does everybody get a go on it? No, because it kicked Malfoy. But I mean, hypothetically speaking, it just seems like an odd choice for the first lesson for Hagrid to give the kids. Yeah. One of you can...

It's like saying one of you can eat ice cream. Exactly, right? But you have to bow to it. You have to bow to the ice cream and then you get as much ice cream as you want. But like, does everybody get... What I'm saying, is everybody going to go? Presumably not.

Or just Harry Potter gets a go. It's like, is it a 45-minute class? Then nobody gets... Not everybody gets a go. Yeah. A couple of people get a go. But Harry Potter gets it. Do you know why?

He's Harry Potter. He's Harry Potter. He's the best kid in the universe. Yeah. i think that bit where he flies around on it i don't think that's in the book from memory it also seems pointless right but you you love that spectacle though no wow i think the okay the flying in this looks better than the previous ones yes but it still doesn't look great for a lot of it. Yeah. There's a few moments of conversation where like they're sitting at different tables

and they'll hear and they hear like Malfoy being like and then the bird kicked me and I was but I was really brave or whatever and they're sitting like

20 feet away and they're like that Malfoy's telling lies again and whatever but you can't hear him. You wouldn't be able to but it's implied that they can hear

it happens a few times in this movie I noticed where people are talking they're like did you hear dumbledore just said this it's like you didn't fucking hear that they've all got magical ears yeah there actually is a thing called magical ears exactly extendable is but that's not what this is mason i see yeah also newspapers are dumb i don't know why they exist in this universe every day a bird drops you a newspaper that has a picture on it that comes to life. What would you prefer then? A phone.

What do you mean? What do you mean? A phone. Like a phone I have now. These are set in the 90s though. Yeah, they're set in the 90s. Okay. But surely there's something

better than a bird delivering you a newspaper. Can't you just have the same newspaper and it changes every day? Oh, right. Like an iPad. Like an iPad

but it's a newspaper and a bird doesn't have to fly in it. They should all have that tiny little laptop that John Conn has in Terminator 2. Exactly. That he uses to break into the bank. That's what I'm saying. I think there was internet,

like the news in the 90s on the internet was quicker than this. Uh-huh. Yeah. They should all have had teletext. Probably. Scrolls. Yes. Uh-huh. So what's the equivalent of the newspaper? Teletext? Yes. I don't think that I'm not even sure these movies are set in the 90s. The books are set in the 90s. Yes. So what's the equivalent of the newspaper? Teletext? Yes. I don't think that... I'm not even sure these movies are set in the 90s. The books are set in the 90s.

But I think these might not be. Wow. Yeah. Big call. I have to think about that. So they should have had phones. They should have had phones. But I could very well be wrong about that.

What do you think of the boggarts? Again, that is a really dangerous thing to give, like, to force children to confront their deepest fears in front of other children. What if your fear is really weird? Yeah. Yeah. What if your fear is... Like walking in and your parents having sex or something.

Yeah, right? I mean, lucky it's just like a snake for most people. Yeah. But I'd imagine most people, it's not just a snake. It's something like deep and existential. Yeah, exactly. Right. Yeah.

Yeah. Like, how does it represent depression? Yeah. Or like, do you, do you, or how does it, how does it represent all your friends leave you? I don't know. And how, how detailed does that get? Yeah. You know?

Do you open the thing and then it's you and then all your friends around you and they tell you horrible things about you and then they leave? Yeah, it might be that. Could be an element of that. Yeah. Does it talk? We don't know. Yeah.

I think it might be able to. Luckily, everybody has funny comical fears, you know? Agreed. Or big spiders. They're afraid of big spiders. Well, big spiders. Okay. I threw this out be able to. Luckily, everybody has funny comical fears. Agreed. Or big spiders. They're afraid of big spiders. Well, big spiders. Okay. I threw this out there on Twitter.

Yes. Ron, and this doesn't apply in the books, what does he even do? Why is he even there? He's useless. He's a worse wizard than everybody. This happens in every book also. There's a misunderstanding and they don't talk for 50 pages.

Yeah, right. And that happens kind of less in the movies, but it still happens quite a bit. Somebody tweeted this at me, and it's true. In the book, he's the connection to the wizarding world. Like Hermione is the smarts. She's got the research. Harry doesn't know what a magic bus is

because he's lived in a closet for 11 years or whatever but ron he grew up in a magical family in the magical world and he has an understanding of it because he's because he had it from a young age yeah right but that's not really that's not really evident here no because and he can't he very rarely is like i yep i have the insider track yes he doesn't because he's the worst wizard as you mentioned he doesn't know any more than any of them and hermione's faster yeah picking stuff up that's right harry is the best yeah just generally and he's rich yeah he could hire advisors or tutors or something you're right why does it why is ron in

this i don't know anyway look it's not that i even hate the character. I just think it's a strange addition that they don't give him that much to do. Yeah. Anyway, I don't know. Sirius Black, right? I just want to get back to that. Do you think it's weird that nobody tells Harry Potter the story behind that? Or even that Harry Potter doesn't even know that story? Like, he hasn't been...

He wasn't like, how did my parents die? What are the specifics behind this i've been in this school for three years i got a library and newspapers yeah right uh-huh you don't know this the newspaper changes every day can't can't can't read an old edition can you can read an old edition you can't though i just think it's strange that and first of all i think it's strange that they don't tell him they go you're not gonna go after serious black and he's like why would i and then that's it of the scene and then he finds out later because he sneaks into a cafe and they're talking about it or whatever i just think it's really bizarre that they keep him in the dark about this because

i think you've got more of a chance of him not doing something irrational if you talk him through it but you know you take a punt with teenagers you know you? You don't know, do you? You don't know how they're going to react. Yeah. Maybe you tell him the secrets and then he... Then you know the secrets. Then you know the secrets, yeah. You know the secrets. Do you know a good Alan Rickman? Was that your Alan Rickman? That was my Alan.

Alan Rickman. Alan Rickman. Do you know what you get a good one? Hang on. Alan Rick... Alan Rickman. Not really, no one um hang on Alan Rick Alan Rickman not really no not bad thank you

I practice mine yep so that's why wait wait wait Mr Cowboy no so what so die hard

oh right okay right oh that really threw me like there's a cowboy character in this movie if only yeah he's good though I think he's I don't think Snape is a is the people like he's a cowboy character in this movie if only yeah he's good though i think he's i don't think snape is a is the people like he's a nungsang hero he sucks he straight up sucks he's

a bad bloke the only reason he changed because he fell in love with harry potter's mom and then he felt bad so he changed sides and he hates harry is that why voldemort's the villain because because harry potter's mom wouldn't be his girlfriend? No. Okay. That's a Snape thing. That's a Snape thing. Okay, right.

Yeah, because they were friends. I'm confused the two. Why is Voldemort the bad guy then? He's a Nazi, basically. Oh, okay, right. That's a shame. But he's also half. Snake.

No. He's half. Slug. Muggle. And he resents himself, but he's like, pure blood's the best thing and I'm. Oh. Curse everybody. Is Hermione half? She's full muggle and he resents himself, but he's like, pure bloods are the best thing and I'm... Is Hermione half... She's full muggle.

Oh. Yeah. They call them mudbloods. That's like the N word. Bloody hell. Yeah. In that universe. Wait, but wait, wait, wait.

But she isn't though, because she can do magic. No, no. Because you're from that lineage. Like Draco and... God, they're so racist. I know. They're so racist. And they're so racist and they own slaves we mentioned we talked about this last time it's not getting any better no but is that is that ever

explored but most like but hey maybe we shouldn't be so racist yeah well most people are cool with it but it's you got your families but like ron is from an extended wizarding family as is serious black as is uh not snape fucking malfoy and all those dudes are related like all their family trees intersect oh yeah so wow yeah powerful stuff i think uh you know that map that they have that you can see anybody everywhere i feel like i'm just shitting on this the entire time but i really do like it you can see anyone everywhere. I feel like I'm just shitting on this the entire time, but I really do like it. You can see anyone anywhere, and there's a very specific incantation to get that working, right?

I solemnly swear I'm up to no good, or whatever it is. How the hell did they figure that out? Who's they? The Weasley boys. A couple of Weasos. Well, maybe... They found it.

It was confiscated. Oh, they found it, right. And they stole it out of... Okay, right. What's his name? Grubb's office. So, the groundskeeper. Yeah, all right.

Flitch, whatever his name is. Like, that's like... That's the equivalent of a combination lock with a thousand... Not a thousand. Like a million combinations of lock across it. Uh-huh. Or more. Or more.

Because you have to do it in the correct order. And you know what? These movies are also missing. What's that? Because Harry Potter's dad and his friends made that. That more. Or more. Because you have to do it in the correct order. And you know what these movies are also missing? What's that? Because Harry Potter's dad and his friends made that. That's who made that thing. Aren't they talented? Aren't they talented?

In the books, Harry Potter's dad is a complete asshole. Like, as a student. Right. He's really arrogant and Harry Potter's mom hates him and he's mean to Snape. He's the Malfoy. He's the Malfoy. That's the reason Snape is the way he is, because he's this super cool magic dude and whatever. But I guess he's got a heart of gold.

And Harry's mother's like, you suck, like flat out. Right. And I guess he changes for a girl or something. I don't know. But yeah. And they explore more of that. I don't think it's in this book. Maybe it is.

Where Harry goes into a memory and it's just his dad just picking on Snape. Like turning him upside down and seeing his underwear and stuff. In many ways, these novels and movies are about overcoming the cruelty of your parents' upbringing, you know? Yes. That's what they're about. Yeah, definitely. Yeah, yeah. My favorite Daniel Radcliffe scene is when he finds out that his parents were murdered by Sirius Black, or he thinks.

And he does a bit of acting. Oh, yep. And he shouts, he was their friend. Yep. I'm going to kill him. I did say out loud, acting, when that happened. Yeah. Do you think it's weird that that man is a rat?

I mean, yes. Yeah. Do you think it's weird that that man is a rat? I mean, yes. Oh, yeah. Well, we throw that in the same basket as, I feel, the map that tells you what everybody is, where everybody is and what they're doing.

Yeah. Does it say on a little scroll what they're doing? I don't know. Going to the toilet currently? Yeah, maybe. Number twos? Number twos. But that rat. Is Rupert's, is Ron's rat.

And before that, it was his brother's rat. Yeah. That's been living with their family. For years. For years, just watching them shower and sitting in on private conversations. Pooing on their stuff. Yeah, that's. Also, it's weird.

When the rat man turns into a man. Yeah. Looks a lot like a rat. Also, when he's a man. Uh-huh. He's in clothes. But then when he shrinks back into a rat, his clothes disappear. Yeah.

Yeah. You're not wrong. Mate, you're not wrong. Put that in the bloody IMD bloopers. Let me tell you. Do you have any thoughts on the serious black confrontation in the shed, in the shrieking shack? Hang on.

Which bit is this? When they... Lupin is... It turns out that he's in on it. Oh, yes, yes, yes. And Peter Pettigrew is a rat. Yeah. Who sometimes has his clothes.

They're all running about and squealing. Yeah. It's pretty good. Is it? No, it's bad. Hell, it's... The Gary Oldman character... Yes.

It's a completely different character. Because as soon as he leaves the shack, he's like, that was weird. Hey, do you want to live with me? Yeah, right? Yeah, yeah, character. Yes. It's a completely different character. Because as soon as he leaves the shack, he's like, that was weird. Hey, do you want to live with me? Yeah, right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. He's insane for 10 minutes.

He's like a guy who smoked way too much weed and he's become unhinged from reality. Yeah. But then he's fine. That's very much, it's Johnny in the room. Yes, it is. Absolutely. He's like like I did not hit her oh hi Mark it's the same thing

that is the equivalent except it's you want to live with me? you want to come over and live with me? but Harry Potter doesn't get his way does he because everybody's sad in this universe or something grim

I was going to say something about that oh Harry Potter isn't going to kill the rat man. He's like, I don't want to kill you. And the rat's like, oh, God bless you, boy. You're my favorite. He's like, because we're going to take you back to the castle and a monster's going to suck your soul out.

Right. That's dark. Yeah. What happens after that? The rat escapes. No, I mean, what happens after your soul gets sucked out? I think you're just vacant. Because I think it gets, you don't see it in the movie.

That's a far worse than death in many ways. In a way. It's a real arbitrary line you've drawn there, Harry Potter. The dude... Spoilers for part four. You know the dude who's mad-eye moody? Yes. He gets his soul sucked out before they get any information out of him in the book, I believe.

I might be wrong. I haven't read in a long time. But yeah, I might be wrong. Anyway, there's a skinny werewolf. But if it bites a dog, that's fine, I think. Okay. Is it? Don't know.

He's shaking his head. He doesn't know. They throw a rock at it, even though he's holding a wand. Uh-huh. And then there's a whole bunch of time travel. Yep. That's a weird element to introduce to this universe. It really is, and then it's never referred to again, right?

I think they apparently destroy all the time turners to this universe. It really is, and then it's never referred to again, right? I think they apparently destroy all the time turners in this universe. Like it's used at some point later, and then I think after Voldemort. But why would you? Just take them away from the children. Yes, but I guess you don't want them banging about. But who built them?

Presumably if somebody built them, they can build them again. Well, yeah, and maybe that's an element of the play. Or maybe it isn't. That whole time travel thing's fine and they go back and they fix everything. But Sirius Black has to fly away on a horse or whatever. And then that's the end.

And then it ends on a really weird freeze frame. Does it? I can't remember. Don't you remember when Harry Potter flies off into the sky? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then the black circle kind of Warner Brothers closes it over him it's a weird ending anyway

I don't think this movie's that good it's quite bad I think it sets I think it does change a lot of stuff which then works better in the next movies

I think maybe you know what stylistically it's better yeah definitely but I feel in terms of like dialogue and characters it's the same

as the previous two but it's not boring no no yeah but it's not unpredictable no i mean you definitely know who the werewolf is you definitely know you definitely know that the executioner doesn't kill the hippogriff because you don't see it die yeah you know yeah absolutely did you think there was going to be time travel? Yeah. But the first time you saw it? Can't remember.

I guess why would you? Yeah, right. What kind of comes out of nowhere? Like there's not, I don't think there's enough. Oh, is there? They hinted a little bit. It's more in the book. There's a lot of like, where did you come from? And there's a little bit of that in the movie.

Yeah, right. Not so much. But it doesn't seem, yeah, there didn't seem to be that much foreshadowing. Yeah. I think maybe that's for people who were fans of the books and like you know when when hermione goes down a corridor and then appears again you go i know what happened there she won't travel through time yeah yeah yeah do you think the werewolf should have been should have

quit how do you mean yeah because he's like oh because he's like i have to leave this place now because i'm a werewolf maybe i did nearly kill a bunch of kids yeah it's probably because he's like... Oh, because he's like, I have to leave this place now. Because I'm a werewolf. Maybe. He did nearly kill a bunch of kids. Yeah, it's probably for the best. Also, he takes a potion normally and it makes him docile. Okay. That's it. It's not a...

See that? The real life metaphor there is whiskey. For teachers. Sometimes. Yeah. They can go the other way. Oh, no. I've seen it, Mason.

Oh, boy. I've been to teachers' Christmas parties. Yeah, right. Yeah, look, it's boy. I've been to teacher's Christmas parties. Yeah, right. Yeah, look, it's fine. I don't think it's terrible. I do think it's better than the last two. Agreed, yeah. Yeah, but it's still a movie.

Okay, now it's time for Harry Potter, the one where they make him fight a dragon. Oh, so good. Might be my favourite one last time. It might be my favourite one. You know what? I finished this one, and I'm like, you know what? I'm kind of looking forward to the next one.

Same. Which I'd never felt before with a Harry Potter movie. Yeah. I'm like, oh, after the end of three, I'm like, oh, I've got to watch another one before we can talk about it. And then I'm like, oh no, I should watch the next one. Have you not seen the ones from here on out? No, I've seen, I think I've seen all of them except the last one.

Oh man. Yeah. They're good from here on. I've seen Snape Kills Dumbledore. Spoiler alert. Dumbledore. Dumbledore. Yeah.

And then I haven't seen the one after that which is the last one no there's two after that there's two okay I haven't seen it okay I'm two behind this movie was going to be split into two books

two movies initially because the book's quite long it's like comparative with the Mace and if you that's three and this is four oh that's a bigger

yeah that is a bigger that's a bigger that's a bigger okay so it opens with Voldemort is a weird little creep baby. And I was going to say it doesn't open in at the Dursleys' house. Yeah. Do you know why?

What's that? Because apparently they wanted more money and they wouldn't. No, you're not that important. Oh, the Dursleys did? Yeah. That is a family unit. The actors playing the Dursleys. Yeah, they got the guy from-

They unionized. The pie in the sky guy. Wow. Father Brown? Yep. Whatever his bloody name is. He solves murders as father brown

he does no there's a like a BBC to pie in the sky it's a different series it's a different series is he a murder solver

in pie in the sky I don't know yeah he's dead in real life oh wow that's a shame yeah he does seem too old

in these movies from the get go though don't you think yeah like too old to be yeah they both seem too old to have the from the get-go though, don't you think? Like too old to be... They both seem too old to have the kid at that age. So she's the sister of

Harry Potter's mum, who's the best woman in the universe and has passed that on to Harry. I mean, she's a real bitch, obviously. Well, that's what they say, isn't it? This also introduces David Tennant, who does a weird tongue-licking thing, which is completely unnecessary, which is apparently improv'd,

because it gives that away way too early, because he's the spooky-eyed man. Yes, right. I think that's a great character, the spooky-eyed man. I was going to say, I would be... Did you pick that? No, I don't think so at the time, no. But...

Oh, you have seen this one? Yeah, I have seen this one. Again, I've seen all except the last no. But... Oh, you have seen this one? Yeah, I have seen this one. Okay, yeah. Again, I've seen all except the last time. Oh, yeah, you said that. I would like to see, maybe if we're doing more Fantastic Beasts movies, and I know they are,

maybe put a Mad-Eye Moody in there. Yeah, it could work. Before he gets the Mad-Eye. Yeah. Before he gets the robot leg. Yeah, yeah. It's got a robot leg. Is it a robot leg or is it just a...

A metal leg. Metal leg, yeah. It's got like bones and stuff. He was in a box for a year. Huh. I think he would have lost some weight. You know what I mean? That's brutal.

You know what I mean? Well, we didn't see him come out. Maybe he was very trim. He just had big baggy clothes. Yeah, yeah. But I love that character. Even though he's a spooky, terrifying David Tennant guy, I think he's really engaging in the spooky terrifying david tennant guy i think he's

really engaging in the way that the werewolf guy isn't yes i think the werewolf guy i always pictured him as ewan mcgregor i think a disheveled ewan mcgregor would have made a better role i think he gets he does more interesting stuff he's better in but i just don't really like that movie that much i guess but uh daniel radcliffe is way better in this. Agreed. He's really good. Is this his biggest hair? It's definitely his biggest hair. But he also, you notice that he's a short guy. This is the one where you notice.

Yeah, right. Because he stands across from Draco, who's like two feet taller. Yeah, right. Yeah. Because in the books, Harry's like six foot or whatever. Oh, is he? Yeah, he grows up tall and strong and handsome. Oh, tall, strong boy.

Yeah, that's it. Wow. This is also the palest He's ever been And I think It's part Could you see him With his shirt off?

No I think I think it's more I think it's lighting But it's also like Because they've also Hit that awkward teen year Where they're all Acne ridden and whatever

Yeah right It's just like Just paint him down Just paint him down With makeup We don't need to see Any of that Just really spray it on Well apparently I think it was this one where they do a lot of cgi tweaks to like

background actors for acne acne acne and stuff yeah so that definitely could be an element of it this is the first movie where the weasley twins are interesting as well because they're supposed to be these crazy jokesters in the books and they're always pranking and being rad dudes and they're the coolest kids in schools and always doing a kickflip or whatever the wizard equivalent of that is. But you never really see it. A wand flip. A wand flip. You don't see much of that, but this movie, they're a little bit more animated. Would you agree with that?

I would agree with that. Because everybody's got long hair in this, if you can believe it. Ah, so much hair going so good the stadium where they go watch the the wizard world cup is garbage just a weird rickety yep why is you know also there's that other you know what there's a then there's that bit as well where they're like uh everybody gather around the boot we're all gonna round the boot and harry's like what's going on they like, that's a teleport boot, you moron. Harry, you idiot. Touch the boot.

He's like, oh. Quick, like, go on the boot. Remember that? Tell him in advance. He could die. Yeah, he could die. Yeah. Yeah, and then he just tumbles out of the air.

I mean, a few of them do. Yeah. This introduces Cedric Diggory. Yeah, right. As tumbles out of the air. I mean, a few of them do. Yeah. This introduces Cedric Diggory as the first role of Robert Pattinson. A lot of people, I said I was watching this, and they're like, oh, that one's got Cedric Diggory. People love him. He's in one movie, right? Yeah.

And he dies. Yeah. Did he have a richer backstory in the books or something? Yeah, he's a pretty prominent character, yeah. I like him. He's a good character. But he never comes back, right? Well, there's stuff about him in the play.

Oh, I see. But it's complicated. I'm not going to get into it. All right. Yeah, but no, he doesn't. In the movies, he doesn't come back. All right. So I don't understand.

It's that thing again in this movie where Malfoy's like, look at these low lives in this stadium. We're sitting with a minister or whatever. Who cares? This stadium sucks. It all sucks. It doesn't matter where you're sitting with a minister or whatever. Who cares? This stadium sucks. It all sucks. It doesn't matter where you're standing. It's all bad. You're just on a vertical wall behind a scaffolding.

Even if you're sitting with a minister. It sucks. Any moment some people on brooms could crash through your head. Yeah, right through your head, mate. Yeah. Even bits like... this is this goes back to everything is shitty and rickety in this universe yeah you remember when the flying

carriage comes in with the horses yep just tumbling through the air there's people in that yeah but it's just spiraling out of the sky yeah it's absolute madness this is another moment where i think how does harry potter not know this? So after the, the wizard festival or the broomstick competition, it's more detailed in the book, but basically Crumb gets the, the snitch. Crumb gets the snitch.

And he gets snitches. Whatever. Rhyme, you know what I'm talking about. I get it. But the Irish get more points so they win the Irish do get more points

yeah so they win wait isn't the rule that if you get the snitch you win no matter what no no you get like 120 points oh you get 20 okay right

but the Irish got more points than that so don't get the snitch yeah just wait till you have more points and then get the snitch crumb he's a glory hog yeah

you know what I mean I bet he doesn't pass you know what I mean if that's a thing in this stupid game. But, so the dark mark gets put in the air. This movie, if I can cut you off, and I'm going to. This movie also marks the first time anyone said, oh my God, it's the Bulgarians.

Or whatever it is. I'm paraphrasing there. Everybody's really excited about the Bulgarians. Everybody's excited about the Bulgarians. Were you not excited? there. Everybody's really excited about the Bulgarians. Everybody's excited about the Bulgarians. Were you not excited? I was a little bit excited for the Bulgarians. They all just look like blockhead meanies. That's what they look like.

But so there's a dark mark goes up in the sky, which seems too complicated. Is it a skull with a snake? Some of the snake coming out of it or whatever. But again, it's one of those things where Harry's like, what's that? Come on, man. Like, how do you not?

You've been at school for, this is your fourth year. This is the dude who killed your parents, right? Snape has a tattoo of this. You know what I mean? He wears robes, but come on, man. You know what I mean? And even if you didn't know specifically what it is. What do you think it is?

You'd be like, look, I'm no fourth year student wizard, but that's bad news. That's bad news. And then of course the ministry comes in and they're like, look, I'm no fourth year student wizard, but that's bad news. That's bad news. And then, of course, the ministry comes in and they're like, this boy Harry Potter summoned the Dark Mark or whatever. There's a long history in these books and movies of nobody believing Harry Potter, even though he's always been right. He's always right. Yeah. I remember. He always has the best intentions or he's right.

Yeah. always has the best intentions or he's right yeah but uh and then that they go back to school and instead of uh doing school for a year they have a weird student olympics yeah which is apparently important so hang on so when if we can go back and say when harry that harry potter's always being blamed yeah is there in the background some sort of conspiracy to always blame harry potter is there some plot? There's elements of that, but it's mostly just general public paranoia and the media, the fake news, Mason. Yeah, the fake news, absolutely.

Coming at it. Okay, that makes sense. That's generally it. Well, there is fake news in this movie. Yes, there is. It's all about fake news. Rita Seeker. Skeekter.

Whatever. Rita Seeker. Rita Seeker. But anyway, basically they shut down everybody's school year and drag people in from another school for a year so they can watch some dumb fucking sports event, which is apparently the most important thing in Wizarding history. Who gives a shit?

It's inter-school sports. You'll be immortalized forever as a champion. That's my Michael Gambon Dumbledore. Yeah. And Harry Potter's name. Right, who cares? Who cares? Who cares? And also genuine physical harm could be before you for no reason.

I mean, and they say that as well. They're like, you could die in this. And there's definitely moments where Harry would have been smashed to bits by that dragon. He would have drowned. That maze would have struggled. The other students would have drowned. Like Hermione could have drowned. Yeah.

I wasn't 100% paying attention when that happened, but they did put her underwater for a long time. Yeah. So what do you think of those underwater models? Bad. Yeah, real bad, right? No good. But it's like you could be horribly mangled to death

or burnt to a crisp or smashed onto some rocks or drowned, but why don't you volunteer? And then people would... Don't ask dumb-ass teenagers. You'd be like, hey, teenagers, do you want to ride in the back of that bus? And they're like, yeah. And then they'd crack their heads on the pavement.

No, don't suggest these things to them. Don't let them do it. For glory! No. Also, three events for a year? Yeah, it's wild, right? It's not a lot. Yeah.

It's not a lot, right? It's really not. Yeah. And also, there's, yeah, there's a moment in the, it's like, okay, now everybody has to, the first event, fight a dragon. Everybody else successfully fought the dragon. Now it's your turn, Harry. Show us the other two.

Yeah. Well, actually, I got a note about that. Oh, yes? First of all, they make him fight a dragon. Yep. It's bizarre that he didn't just put his broomstick in a tree near him so he could grab it, because he waited quite a long time for it to turn up.

A thought I had during these advances, it doesn't appear there to be any rules as to what you can and cannot utilise to complete the tasks. Or is there, though? It seems like, it'd be like if you were doing the 100 metre dash at the Olympics.

Yeah. And you just got a bike out. Like, you had a bike hidden by the side of the track and you went, hang on, and you got the bike and then you did it. That is the equivalent. I feel like, though, Surely there's a rule against it. You couldn't get on the bike quick you did it. That is the equivalent. I feel like there's a rule against it.

You couldn't get on the bike quick enough to win, but maybe the 400. Yeah. Maybe the 400. Yeah. But I don't disagree with that. Or a car. Or a car.

You got a car. Well, he just summoned the fastest broom in the world, right? Fastest broomstick in the world to do this. Like surely that's against the rules. Yeah, definitely. I can't believe he walked out and didn't look around. past his broomstick in the world to do this like surely that's against the rules yeah definitely

I can't believe he walked out and didn't look around he just walks out and he's like sees the egg and he's like oh yeah and then he nearly gets smashed

like he's so close to dying yeah is somebody there with like a spell to stop him from getting hit it didn't seem like it but even if there is or like

I've got the healing charms or whatever, if that thing cracks your skull open, if your brain goes from one corner of the field to the other corner of the field, you're dead. I don't care how many time turners there are. In fact, if all the time turners were destroyed, allegedly, maybe you should have saved some for putting that kid's brains

back in his head. So what is also bizarre about this, though, and we'll get back to the dragon, but then make him fight a dragon, is that his name goes in the cup. And then there's some Michael Gambon, like, Hey, did you put your name in there for us to talk about or whatever?

It's really bizarre. It's a very out of character, even for this version of the character. Yeah, right, uh-huh. The way he rushes into the room and just... Harry Potter! So there's that element of... You're such a renegade, Harry Potter, except you never are.

You never have been. We've always assumed it about you. 100 points! Yes. But... And the second part, which you may be getting to, is that they're just like, well, I guess so. Yeah.

It's fine. And they also all realise that his name is in there for a reason and it's probably a bad thing it's definitely a trap why would it not, well this has never happened in the thousands of years we've been doing this but it's Harry Potter

the guy everyone's always trying to kill yeah fair enough also how is it that you can put some sorcery on this this ancient artifact goblet of fire to make it do that yes but you can't like scan it to see if that's been done yeah you know what i mean surely there should be some some surely there should be Like the wizard equivalent Of IT support Who's just like

Yep this has been Tampered with actually Yeah right You think Dumbledore It's been tampered with By him actually Yeah that's got I can tell

Because of the Well wands also have a memory See So you know their previous spells Oh what Yeah I think that's a thing Oh Yeah so just grab everyone's wand

And snap them Yeah Yeah They're trying to take Probably you could definitely go Well that's bloody Mad-Eye Moody Yeah It might have been So just grab everyone's wand and snap them. Yeah. Yeah. They're trying to take them. Probably, you could definitely go, well, that's bloody Mad-Eye Moody. Was it Mad-Eye Moody? It might have been, or he could have put Karkarov under the spell to do it or whatever. Yeah, probably could have put Karkarov.

So, okay, I'm going to jump ahead. You know how you could make somebody do things with a spell? Yeah. And a lot of people were like, well, we're under the Invictus curse or whatever it is so you're doing the dark lord's bidding right and people were like we didn't know who was doing it and who wasn't their eyes are white those are the people that were doing it everybody else was just regular people yeah right just deciding to do it by themselves maybe they wore magical contact lenses maybe they wore contact lenses but that seems a little like yeah you look like a zombie.

You're a walking zombie. It's bizarre to me. But I don't understand why they don't go, okay, Harry, so you're in this tournament. Magically and legally, you can't get out. Ministry official Barty Crouch Sr. insists that after being selected, the champions are bound by a contract. Well, he's the bad guy, isn't he?

He is the bad guy, And he winds up dead. Yeah. But you know what? When he's got to fight the dragon, he just doesn't get the egg. He walks out and he walks back into the tent. And that's what the teachers tell him. Because he could die.

And because someone's trying to murder him. Why does he have to compete in any of this stuff? Yeah, right? Just trade water for an hour. Yeah, for sure. And then you lose. You're last. You could just go out into the thing, see the egg and go, oh, I'm feeling

so faint. Yeah. I'm falling over now. But he's the best. Yeah, I guess he's the best. But I do like that the only reason he wins is because he's helped. Like, he doesn't win because he's good for a lot of it. But people are like, listen, do this specific thing and you will win.

Because he's not supposed to be there. So I like that element of it. All right, okay. I love this movie, actually. Again, I feel very strongly like, if, again, 100 Meter Dash, and I was like, hey, Usain Bolt,

can I get a piggyback ride? And then he does it. And you both win? Yeah, we both win. But I shouldn't win. But you both win. We both, that's true. We both win.

Okay. And there was another moment in that where they're like, well, Harry, you technically were last or something, but because you were brave, Okay So when There was another moment in that Where they're like Well Harry You've Technically you were last Or something But

Because you were brave I guess you're not You're Second or something Yeah What? No That's not the rules

No You've changed the rules Look everybody did the 100 metre dash Much faster than you Yeah But you saw a Scary dog And you kept running

So I guess You yeah now the winner well it's like at the olympics when somebody falls right yeah and it's such a big deal when somebody stops and helps them up because they fall for the place yeah and whenever it does happen when it really does it's amazing but they don't win no they they're also disqualified it's very much that thing of like 100 points for harry potter Potter. You're the bravest boy in school or whatever. Anyway, this is the dragon thing I was going to say. This is from the book. Victor Crumb against the Chinese Fireball

uses the Conjunctivitis Curse to blind the dragon. However, he was docked points when the dragon stumbled and smashed half of the real eggs. Wait, what? The dragon that they're using Has real eggs that it's guarding Oh it's offspring presumably And he got it to kill its own eggs Wow

So he got some points dealt So that's crazy right? That they would do that? Yeah Committed genocide That kid did is what happened Look and I think We've said this every time we bring up Harry Potter But i think it bears repeating perhaps we've got some new listeners yeah um

that and it's something that you said when we watched these movies originally that i have since been saying as if it were my own okay to other people in private it's that these this tri wizard cup is the equivalent in real life if we're going back to real life, of taking some school children, putting them on a helicopter and dropping them into a prison riot. Yes, it is. I said that? Maybe they get a gun.

Maybe. Maybe. Or maybe they're killed immediately. Technically, they could survive this. But the odds are pretty slim, aren't they? Yeah, absolutely. That's a good metaphor. Thank you.

Man, I was setting trends. Yeah, you really were. That was before this show, I said that? Yeah, absolutely. That's a good metaphor. Thank you. Man, I was set in trends. Yeah, you really were. That was before this show, I said that? Maybe, probably. Wow, good on me. So, Moaning Myrtle's weird, right? Oh yeah, the weird ghost that's all perving on people. I looked up...

Getting in your bath and stuff. I looked up how old she was. She's 40 in this movie. Oh, and Harry Potter's 14. Yeah, I mean, she's not supposed to be 40. She's supposed to be a student. She's a student who got killed by the basilisk. She's been around for 40 years. No, she's... The actor... Oh, the Harry Potter's 14. Yeah, I mean, she's not supposed to be 40. She's supposed to be a student. She's a student who got killed by the basilisk. But she's been around for 40 years.

No, she's... The actor is 40. Oh, no. That's weird. That is weird. But I guess if they want to... No, I see why they did that. Why?

Because she's supposed to look like a student, but also she's been around for way too long. That's not how ghosts work, is it? This is how this ghost works. One of them sometimes John Cleese in early movies. I think, yeah, good on him. He's nearly headless. Look, Nick.

Anyways, trial two is the crowd just staring at a lake for an hour. Yeah, there's no underwater cameras. I don't get it. I don't get it. Yeah. Because they've got stone bowls that you can see shit in or whatever. Right. But just stare at a lake and just wait for somebody with a shark head to reappear.

You don't know what they're doing. There's not... So maybe I tuned out slightly during this point. But the idea is they put your friends underneath the water. Yeah, they steal them and they put them under water. They steal your friends, they put them under, and then you have to free them. But you could be killed by weird piranha squid creatures. Yes.

Also, it's not in any of the movies but there's a giant octopus that lives in that lake. Huh. Hmm. Could kill you though. Yes.

Yeah, very much so. Along with everything else that lives in that lake. And then you're allowed to use any magical means at your disposal Yep. to go underwater.

Yeah. So you can turn into a shark or you can grow gills. We can do whatever the third person did. Bubble face. You can bubble over the face. Oh, yeah. Okay. That would be it.

They did that. Yeah. Did they? Yeah. Okay. The two others did it. Cool, man. I find it bizarre that Harry Potter and his friends couldn't work out a breathing underwater spell.

Spell. Yeah. Don't you think that's like you just go to the underwater section of the library or whatever i'd imagine that would be really accessible yeah or you could what you could do potentially is if you couldn't do that find a spell that makes a straw really long and just put it above put it above the water you could just have an oxygen tank couldn't you yeah any number of things. You could just go to the diving store and buy one.

Get one of James Cameron's little submarines. Open a portal to a diving store in the real world and steal it. Yeah. Because apparently nothing is off limits, including crime, to win these things. So, yeah. Get a little submarine. That's all great stuff. Drain the lake.

Drain the lake. Drain the lake. Yeah, you could drain the lake. Yeah. And everyone would fall to their death. No, because they're on sticks or something? No, no. I mean, no, everybody else in the competition. So you jump in last.

You get rid of the water. Everybody falls to their death. Yeah. Then you go down. Oh, it just pops out of existence. Yeah. Yeah, nice. Okay.

I was going to say put a big, like a black hole. Oh, yeah. And then the water would go down and then you just get them off the sticks. Nice. Yeah. Yeah, nice. Okay. I was going to say put a big, like a black hole. Oh, yeah. And then the water would go down and then you just get them off the sticks. Nice. Yeah.

These are all great ideas. We've got so many good, we would have been great at Hogwarts. Or turn into a shark. You could turn into a shark. Yeah. Is that illegal?

You go to jail for turning into half a shark? It is against God's will. So yes, I think you would. So they can go to jail. I want to be clear,

in this universe, God exists and he's really mad at all the things that are happening. Okay, so the last trial is again... I can't remember what it is. It's a maze.

Oh, yeah, you just got to... You're going to a maze, but if you're in the audience, you just stare at a maze. That's what you do for an hour. That's true. You'd think that fighting the dragon would be last. Yeah. I feel it's the most dangerous. Yes. And also Like it's, it's, you'd think the fighting the dragon would be last. Yeah. I feel it's the most dangerous.

Yes. And also it's the most visually exciting. When they're like, this maze will make you go mad and you'll go, you'll never get out of it or whatever. It's just a bit scary. In the, in the book,

you got to like, there's a whole bunch of other stuff in it. Like you got to get, there's like a Sphinx asks you a riddle. And if you don't get it, it'll beat you to death. Oh, terrific. Stuff like that.

But there's none of that. It's just the walls close in or whatever. But then, so that culminates in... And this is where this movie gets really interesting, I feel. Because it's all kind of fun and games. Yeah. And then a boy gets murdered. It really does.

Yeah. So they go to the... They get teleported. Okay. Mad-Eye Moody, right? It's not Mad-Eye Moody. It's David Tennant. I can't believe that the entire plan was to have Harry Potter

do so well in the tournaments, bleeding up to the maze, that he'd get a little bit of a head start and hopefully touch the cup first. Yeah, right. And go to the graveyard. Yeah. But you could turn any item, like a boot, into a teleportation device. He could have harry pick up that pencil you get him term one you know what

i mean bam you're in the graveyard yeah yeah you say hey hey harry what's that over there and he looks and you put a you put a pillowcase over his head you stick the gold snitch in there you zip tie he's dead voldemort wanted his, so he's impervious to Harry Potter's love magic. There would be plenty of blood in that pillowcase. Let me tell you. It'd be like a soup in there. After that snitch has gotten trying to escape there. It would knock out both his eyes.

Yeah. Great stuff. Wait, what's the plot again? He goes in and there's an evil snake man. He's a Ralph Fiennes boy. But before he goes in there, I find it really interesting. Wait, but why didn't he need the blood? Because then he can touch Harry Potter.

Because if you remember in the first Harry Potter, he touches Harry Potter. And he disintegrates. He disintegrates because he's Harry Potter. He can't do that anymore. But Harry Potter still gets pain from his scar when he looks at him or touches him or whatever. That goes away. It's a whole thing. You haven't seen it already, But Harry Potter still gets pain from his scar when he looks at him or touches him or whatever. That goes away. It's a whole thing. You haven't seen it already, so I won't tell you.

But so it's Harry's compassion and fair sportsmanship that gets Cedric killed. Because it's his idea to rescue him and then be like, let's touch this cup together. It gets him killed. I think that's really great. Not great. Does he ever think about it ever again i mean he's sad afterwards he's definitely sad they talk about it a bit in the next book and i'm not sure if they so much in the next movie i can't really

remember but yeah i like that element of it that it's it's his compassion that kind of got this kid killed and it's really sad when he comes back and his dad figures it out yeah it's really fucked up yeah yeah and everybody's like, hooray, they're back. Yeah, there's the music going and everything. One million points to Harry Potter. Oh, no. The dead boy gets no points. Yes.

What house was the dead boy in? Take some points off that house for a dead boy. So the Voldemort showdown I like. I think Ralph Fiennes is really good they CGI off his nose he's a bit spooky the rat man's there is that the first time

we see proper Voldemort in the movies yes we see him as a little baby we see him as a snake on the back of a man's head yeah we see him as a memory

in a diary yeah right in a pensy yeah but I think he's a really he's played really well and he's really creepy and like weird translucent skin and yeah he used to he used to look like a man

and he kind of all the dark magic that he's kind of been digging around with right turned him into a weird snake man but did you like their the confrontation i'm still not 100% sure why he's evil. Like, I know he said he's a Nazi. Yeah, because he wants to rule everybody. But why is he that way? But he wants to enslave muggles. Because he grew up all weird. He grew up in an orphanage.

He basically had Harry Potter's life, but he's evil. Right. Different cupboard. Yeah. There's a bit where Michael Gambon's character in a flashback, it's actually set 10 years after the Jude Law one, so it makes no sense. Those guys are not the same. Young Aldor is killing it.

He's got a twinkle in his eye. Ah, so twinkly. Yeah, but the old guy, not as much. But where he goes in, you see where he finds young... His name's Tom Riddle because he's just a regular orphan boy. He doesn't know that he's magic. But he's like, hey, did you realize you were special? And he's like, oh, yeah, I can make people in pain if I want to.

And I can set things on fire and I steal things. And he's like... Oh, you're a serial killer. Yeah, he's like... So from the get-go, Dumbledore's the only one who's like, this kid's not right. Better train him. Yeah, better train him. But he gave him more skills.

Yeah. But he's the only kind of teacher... He tricks every other teacher. Because... And he's so rapt that he's special and whatever. Yeah, right. But all the other teachers fall for it. Because he saw it from day one. He's like, this kid's got something wrong with his brain.

I mean, you wouldn't word up any of the other teachers, would you? Well, he wasn't... Because you want to be special. Dumbledore wants to be special, doesn't he? Yes. But he wasn't principal. Even so. Just take him out for a drink at the end.

Friday knockoff drinks. Like, hey, that Tom Riddle, he's going to try and kill you. Yeah. And he does. Or take Tom Riddle out for a drink and shoot him in the head. Or snitch in the pillowcase. Snitch in the pillowcase. Thank you.

Yeah. Is there like, in the Harry Potter universe, is there like a room where magic doesn't work or something? That's a good question. I'm sure there's the equivalent. There's like a, you know, you put a bag on their head and their magic doesn't work, something like that.

There's got to be something. I'm sure there's anti-something-something. I mean, you know those cages that they're in? I'm sure they do something. Oh, yeah, good point, actually, yeah. But it doesn't stop you turning into a dog and escaping does it no i guess it doesn't uh why would you stay in the prison that long if you knew you could turn well i just thought he was content all right like he was like whatever i got him and voldemort's dead so who cares it's my life

also i turned into a dog illegally so i should be here yeah it's actually good for in the book and this is hinted at in the movie he sees the photo of ron's parents in uh in egypt and he sees the rat and he's like oh shit so that's why he breaks i recognize that rat yeah he's a real pervert that's that son of a bitch i like the include probably looking at all the weasleys in the mood i like the inclusion of har Harry's parents in this. They come back through the... Because, you know, their brother's sister wands, they've got the same unicorn hair in it or some shit. I don't know.

Okay. Yeah. All right. Yeah, I get it. Yeah, all right. Now, is that actually them or is that just like... It's an echo. Okay, right.

But, yeah, I guess because it's not explained, but the people who come out of the wand are the last people that he's killed in the order. There's also supposed to be an old man in there. The old man comes out in the book. I don't think he does in the movie because the old man he kills at the start. Oh, yeah, the cleaner or the custodian or whatever.

The lighthouse keeper. Cedric, the old man. He looks like a lighthouse keeper. I don't think he is. Yeah, Cedric and the parents. And thenodian or whatever. The lighthouse keeper. Cedric, the old man. He looks like a lighthouse keeper. I don't think he is. Yeah. Cedric and the parents. And then the parents are whatever. Oh, right.

Yeah. Who else is going to be in that one? I'll tell you what. Good thing that bloody cup worked as well to get him back. Yep. Like the magic didn't wear off, so that's good. And then it turns out that old Mad-Eody's a weird little david tennant snake man or whatever and he's got the his tongue and he's in the case yep he sat up he really

cramped in that yeah okay yeah so that's yeah that's all good stuff anyway i think this movie's great even though i've made fun of it for a lot of it look even though stop giving incredibly powerful weapons of mass destruction to children it's pretty good, I like this one having watched this I'm like yeah I'm kind of jazzed for the next one should we try and let me find out when Fantastic Beasts 2 is out

because maybe we'll get another one in this year get another one I think it's like November maybe yeah november 16th yeah maybe it's august now so we didn't do one last year so maybe we'll do the next two when uh oh how many do we have left then four all right we could we could do just one then if you wanted no let's do um two... Wait, how many's left? Four. Okay.

It's the prophecy... It's okay, you don't have to list them. I'm going to list them. All right. The Order of the Phoenix, Half-Blood Prince, Deathly Hallows Part 2. Part 1 and 2. Okay.

Yeah. And then we're back to Fantastic Beasts. All right, we can do two and two. I still think in 10 years from now, they're going to Force Awakens this shit. They're going to bring everybody back. They're going to make The Cursed Child into a trilogy or bring everybody back they're going to make the cursed child into a trilogy or something and it's going to make four billion dollars wow be cool and if you don't like it mason yes do you like it you're

okay with that i'm going to say hypothetically speaking just to see what you're going to say i don't like it that's okay huh you son of a bitch and that's the end of Harry Potter hooray who knows what he'll get up next time I mean everybody who's watched all the other movies and read all the other books

why are his clothes so crap if he's got so much money good question why was he so sad when they I had that grey jacket with the white

line down the sleeve the track jacket yeah the dirty track jacket yeah you better believe it it wasn't my jacket there was two jackets no it's a different I remember that Jack all your jackets dirty track jacket right good why is he so sad that he's one for these that is broomstick

broke when you can just buy another one that's a good quick cuz it's great just buy another one you're rich you didn't need to you got given one yeah he would be given one wouldn't he he was yeah anyway you know what it's time for oh is it time for what we're reading yes it is and what we're gonna read it is i'm doing the thing what are we reading today hey man what are you reading uh i've been watching final space i watched that what do you think got better see been watching Final Space. Oh, what's that? What do you think? Got better.

See, I'm like four in. Yeah. And boy, that character's little, the main character's very great. Isn't he? Yeah, he really is. Is it the voice? It's the voice and I don't, well, see, that's the thing. Like he strikes me very much as a Zap Brannigan character.

But it's not. Which doesn't work as a main character. But I know a lot of people who've binged this and loved it. I enjoyed it. By the end, I liked it. I'm enjoying it more. But the only reason I got through the first two or three is because a number of people said, are you watching Final Space?

You've got to watch Final Space. It's so good. But as far as animated shows on Netflix, it is no, for example, BoJack Horseman. No. As an example. Or Rick and Morty, which is also on some Netflix versions. Yes, that's right. We've got it, don't we?

We sure do. Yeah, no, I'd say definitely stick with it, but I wouldn't say that character is good. Yeah. He's not even like Lister, Dave Lister, Red Dwarf. No, and this show is kind of... He's not lovable at all no it's shades of he's just

exactly he's irredeemably annoying but I mean but he does have a bit of a tragic backstory that they get into but I still don't think that yeah I think everybody else is more interesting than he is

for everybody who doesn't know what we're talking about Final Space is an animated show and it's about a guy named Gary yes who pretended to be a like a spaceship captain. Yep.

And it's in the future and he accidentally destroyed a whole bunch of spaceships. And so he's been sentenced to live and work on a spaceship on his own, sort of out in deep space. Yeah. And then he encounters a friendly little alien creature that is actually a weapon of mass destruction

and he has to protect it. David Tennant's the bad guy. David Tennant is the bad guy these are all he's always getting around being the bad guy isn't he do you like him

yeah I do like him he's very charming me too and he's also Scrooge McDuck what Scrooge McDuck oh the new one is he

he's the new Scrooge McDuck have you seen any of that show not yet no I heard it's good yeah is it I don't know what

Final Space I don't know Final Space I don't know I guess the more you watch it the more the personalities of the characters emerge because some of them are quite faceless but I guess that's weird because there's

the ship's computer and there's also the little android drone there's a whole bunch of faceless kind of robots that run about. But then we get Mooncake, who's the little weapon of mass destruction. We get the Catman. Yeah. Catman's good. Yeah, I agree.

But yeah, I think you don't have to stick with it. Because I'm a big proponent of not sticking with a thing just because it gets better later. Yeah, right. But if you're okay with it. I'm going to give it a couple more. Yeah. I think you'll be all right by then. I liked it enough where I'll watch the next season.

All right, okay. I'll at least start it and see where it goes. Why is that, though? Is it because the character's grown on you or because the storyline is engaging? I think the story elements of it, yeah. But the character does grow on you. Okay. All right.

What a fungus. I bought tickets to Harry Potter and the Cursed Child or whatever. The stage show, which is coming to Melbourne this... I bought five tickets. Next year, right? And luckily I can write this off as a business expense because, ho boy, they are very expensive. Uh-huh. And I've read the play.

Anyway, I've read the book, but I wanted to see it. And now I will see it next June. So that'll be good. He's hoping you don't hate Harry Potter by then. I'm sure I will. But yeah, I am looking forward to it. I just wish it wasn't as expensive as it is. You'd think it'd be cheaper because like a lot of...

I was going to say you'd think it'd be cheaper because a lot of parents wouldn't want to take their kids. But that's exactly the position you want. That's right. These people want you to be in. You've got kids. You've got a whole bunch of kids that want to see Harryry potter and and they have to see harry potter so you're like well i guess i'm spending a thousand dollars plus on these tickets yeah a lot of people a lot of criticism

of that is because harry potter they kind of look skywalker him a little bit because they're like well he's just a dad and he's and he's sad and whatever he's not it's like well yeah because he's fucking 35 now you know that's why the saddest stage yeah that's right i know because he's had a hard horrible life yeah right he's just trying to like what do you think he's gonna be anyway i think it's good a lot of people don't like it but i think it's good all right yeah should i read the book we're gonna read the other ones you're gonna know how they end first yes all right all right i'll continue to watch them all right great yeah you could definitely go off the movies and but i mean i sort of know how the the movies end yeah harry dies right yeah for a bit i was gonna say i was gonna say i said that as a

joke but then i'm like yeah i'm pretty sure he does kind of die yeah yeah good stuff yeah uh i also have been reading the Jeff Lemire Hit Girl run it's two issues in they did a series previous to this a new one

which I thought was good I was not aware this existed but I really like the new one this is Hit Girl this is of the kick-ass universe

correct is it a prequel or a sequel but I quite like the last one but I think this one is much better so I mean

Jeff Lemire did he write the previous one no I don't believe so was much better. Oh, interesting. I mean, it's Jeff Lemire. Did he write the previous one? No, I don't believe so. Was that Mark Millar? I don't know. It's not bad, but this is better, as I've said. All right.

What's happening with Hit Girl these days? She's in the Canadian wilderness. So, you know, it's a real Jeff Lemire situation. Yeah, right. She fights a bear. There's snow and sadness. There's a lot of snow and sadness. Yeah, he's great.

What's she doing out in the wilderness? Hit man jobs. Hit girl jobs. That's probably true, yeah. Yeah, so there you go. Is there any kick-ass cameos already? No. In the previous run, she recruits another guy to be kick-ass.

And he's like, I don't want to do this. You're an insane person. I never wanted to do this ever or whatever. So, yeah. Is she still like 12 yes okay cool yeah great which i think works better than being 22 yeah right because it feels i don't know what it's no that makes sense because that if she's 12 yeah it's much easier for to like if she gets to like her 20s she'd be like what am i doing yeah exactly but if she's still a

kid who's being raised to be this yeah lunatic killer yeah and she's still like well this is the way life is yeah this is what i do exactly kill but you know what it's time for now is it time for lettuce yes oh lucky i've got the lettuce then that is lucky the classic one was Letters, oh letters, we love you. Some letters, they're only a day away. I know they're here right now. We're going to do letters. Very good, Mason. Very nice. Yeah, if you want to reach us,

share a hashtag weeklyplanetpod on Twitter or shoot a Gmail over to weeklyplanetpod at gmail.com. Shoot a Gmail. And then Mason will see that Gmail. And raise that Gmail. Whoa. Do you want to go first or do you want me to go first? I had one, but I've lost it.

So go for your life. Who's Robess Harris? How do you think Marvel will handle Josh Brolin as Cable and Thanos now that they own Deadpool? We didn't talk about that in the news. The merger went through. Yeah, that's right. Billions and billions of dollars. Recast Cable or make an exception?

Hashtag weekly planet pod. I think it'll be an exception situation. For sure, yeah. Yeah. I mean, the odds of them being... You can't really tell that they're the same person.

Yeah, and the odds of them being in the same room at the same time. Good. Slim. Yeah. There you go. That's crazy, Mason,

that you would say that. Yeah. But I mean, we still don't know how much crossover there's going to be. No. I would say the crossover potential of Deadpool

and the rest of the Marvel Universe is pretty slim. Yeah, right, exactly. I don't think they're going to do his wacky shenanigans flying in and out, and he's going to meet Captain America, and Captain America's going to be like, I don't approve of this. Look, I don't know.

I think we should leave a lot of the speculation. No, I get it. We should save a lot of the speculation until Avengers 4 is finished, and we know who's still of the speculation. No, I get it. We should save a lot of the speculation until Avengers 4 is finished and we know who's still left alive. All right, then. Because it's going to be difficult for him to get up in the face of Captain America's dust. Are you telling people to stop sending us X-Men Avengers speculation?

No, I love them. I think it's good. Okay. Keep it going. Never stop. What do you got, Mason? This is from Michael Rolston. I know him.

This also could have gone under what we read in. I don't know him, just to be clear. I said I knew him. He says, hey, CrossFit dad, I'm walking Mr. Coyier advert. I do know him. So you do know him, yeah. Only your closest, closest friends know that you're mad for CrossFit. Yes.

Netflix produces a lot of stuff. He's not wrong. Yeah. One of their newest is Extinction. It's a movie. It's got Michael Peña, Lizzie Kaplan, Mike Colton. Oh, yeah, I saw a thing of stuff. He's not wrong. Yeah. One of their newest is Extinction. It's a movie. It's got Michael Peña, Lizzie Kaplan, Mike Colton.

Oh yeah, I saw a thing for that. If you saw it, what did you think? I hated it. He said it's good, definitely worth a watch, better than previous

sci-fi or fantasy movies from Netflix. But you hated it. Like Spectral Bright or Cloverfield Paradox. I mean, it's a low bar. Yeah,

that is a very low... What's Spectral spectral i didn't say spectral but it appears to be some dudes in like armored costumes and they're like some sort of supernatural special forces or something great watch it the best one is annihilation by a long shot that wasn't produced that produced that was produced separately and then it went to Netflix I think these are like Netflix produced

yeah so what was that one called? Extinction would you like to hear about it? of course I would here's the thing I watched it because I thought

it's got Michael Peña who's from Ant-Man and a whole bunch of other stuff Lizzie Kaplan who's in a lot of stuff and Mike Holt who's Luke Cage

yeah great cast I'm going to spoil this for everybody I'm ready so strap in I'm excited okay a whole bunch of other stuff. Lizzie Kaplan, who's in a lot of stuff, and Mike Holt, who's Luke Cage. Yeah, great cast. I'm going to spoil this for everybody. I'm ready. So strap in. I'm excited. Okay, so Michael Peña and Lizzie Kaplan are a married couple. They've got a couple of kids.

It's a dream. It's a dream, right? You'd think so, but that dream's going to turn into a nightmare. Oh, no. Exactly, right? So Michael Peña keeps having these weird dreams where this light appears in the sky

and then it's an alien spaceship and it starts blasting people in the streets. And they're like, oh, no. How's the effects on that? Bad. And then people have to run from this invading alien army and then he has another dream where he and his wife are fighting

in this post-apocalyptic city that's been destroyed or whatever. Cool. And the dreams are ruining his life. He can't get enough sleep. And so he's missing his kids' dance recitals or whatever is happening. And then...

So then he... Everybody thinks he's crazy. Is this good at this point? You were like, that's interesting. Nothing really happens for about an hour. And it goes for 90 minutes. So anyway, at about the 50 minute mark, everybody thinks he's crazy, but then a little bit,

and then they go to a dinner party, and then this bright light appears in the sky, and there's an alien spaceship. So he tells people. He's told a couple people. He tells his wife and everybody's like, and everybody else is like, he's a bit unbalanced.

And then the light appears in the sky and there's an alien spaceship and it starts shooting people and they go on the run and they're like, oh no. And then these like shock troops come down. They're like armored and they've got masks on

and they're shooting at everybody and they're just gunning people down. Are they aliens? Well, they go on the run. You can't tell because they've got masks on. But they look alien. Or is it just like, that's a man in a suit. Well, it definitely looks like a man in a suit.

Okay, good. Yeah, but they're aliens. They are aliens. No. But then what happens is, what happens is they're all on the run from these aliens. Did I guess the twist from just your description of this? Are you ready?

I'm ready. Okay. No, I'll tell you the thing. You tell me if you know. No, no. Did I? Are they men? Yes.

Yeah. So what happens? It's not an invasion. No, it is an invasion. That's the twist upon the twist. Okay. So basically,

what happens is and then Michael Peña gets one of their guns and he rigs it so he can use it because he can't use it because it's like biometric whatever and he rigs it so it does work. What was his't use it because it's like biometric, whatever. And he rigs it so it does work.

What was his job in the real world? He's like an engineer. He works for a aerospace company or whatever. And then some of his friends appear and they have guns and they start shooting back at these alien guys. And it's like, what's happening? And then his wife gets caught in the crossfire and she gets injured. She gets shot.

And then they capture him. Is he Captain? Very nice. Thank you. And then they capture one of these alien guys right and then the guy takes off his mask and he's human and he can understand them right he can he can speak english and then it's russia you're so close am i really no you're not close but basically then uh he takes off the mask it's the bulgarians it's oh my god it's the bulgarians uh and then he's and then he's like i can don't don't kill me i can save your wife but you gotta you gotta trust me and then they go him and the wife and the alien guy they go to this like a open another room and then and then they cut open Lizzie Kaplan, and she's a robot.

And Michael Peña's a robot, and his kids are robots, and it turns out everybody on Earth is a robot, and what happened was that many years ago, many, no, you're not taking this seriously, James. Many years ago, humans created... What? Humans created synthetic humans, like robots, Now, you're not taking this seriously, James. Many years ago, humans created... What?

Humans created synthetic humans, like robots, and they made them do menial jobs or whatever. Oh, they took over. And then there was a robot uprising. Yep, yep, yep. And then there was a robot uprising. And that's what he remembers, is all the explosions and the shooting and the post-apocalyptic society

was what they did back in the day. But they wiped their memories? Well, then the humans left. All the humans left to go to Mars or something. And then some of the robots had their memories wiped so they didn't have to remember what they did. And then they all continued to live on Earth.

But some of them remembered? Some of them did remember. The ones that had the guns and came back they remembered but then the humans that lived on Mars their grandchildren were like

we're gonna go back to Earth and we're gonna make Earth great again yes and they're like we're gonna go back and see what's up there and then they just show up

and start shooting because they're like it's one of these it's one of these ones where they clearly went okay we need the humans to look like aliens, so we're going to have to make them seem like hostile aliens. Yeah.

So we're going to have to figure out plot-wise how that's going to work. So it's like, our grandparents told us that you were violent murderers, so that's why we just came in and started shooting. That's the explanation for that. Right. And we didn't know what the atmosphere was like. Maybe we couldn't even breathe it. So that's why we wore full body. Could you just say

this is armour? Yeah, right? But they didn't. But also Don't you have a thing that says whether there's an atmosphere? Exactly! You're on Mars! If you're on Mars and you have spaceships Anyway, it was really dumb. Well, I didn't guess the twist. You were close though. Was I? Yeah, kind of. No, I wasn't spaceships. Anyway, it was really dumb. Well, I didn't guess the twist.

You were close though. Was I? Yeah, kind of. No, I wasn't. All right. Anyway, Micah, thanks for writing in. I'm sorry I didn't like it, but it was no good. So what's the ending?

The ending is then all the robots get on their own spaceship and they leave. Every robot? Apparently. Okay. We never see how many spaceships there are so where does michael pena go he also goes but where just into space can't they just live together humans and robots yeah well it didn't work last time did it no they were shooting each other they were shooting each other wow yeah well that sounds great i'm gonna watch that as soon as this finishes because i can't wait to watch it again. No, it was bad.

Got one more tweet here from Jeff Polka. Hey, Mr. Sunday Movies and Wikipedia Brown. It's us. What do you call chicken parmesan? Is it a parma or a parmy? Is it a Sydney Melbourne thing? It's a parma. It's a parma.

It's a chicken parmigiana. So that's for people who don't know. It's a chicken... Parmigiana. It's a schnitzel. Yeah, it's a schnitzel. It's a chicken parmigiana. So that's for people who don't know. It's a chicken... Parmigiana. It's a schnitzel. Yeah, it's a schnitzel. It's a chicken schnitzel, and then you put tomato paste on it. Napoli sauce.

And then you put a slice of ham for some reason, and then cheese. Something like that, and then cheese. I think they're vastly overrated. Wow. You've never had a good one, my friend. No, I have. I think because they're mostly not good. Oh, right.

They're mostly average. But it's also, it's safe. If you go to a pub and you want something, they probably will do an okay job. It's the gold standard. If you get one, it's a good yardstick of a pub. Yeah. If I find a new pub, I order the chicken parmigiana. Yes.

Just to see if they can get that right. And I trust them with other stuff. If they can't get it right, I'm never coming back. What are you even doing with your life if you can't even get that right? Exactly. I prefer a chicken schnitzel with gravy. I don't like any of the extra stuff on it. You don't need it. Like a slice of ham. What? If it's good ham, it

works, but often it's bad ham. That's what I'm saying, Mason. Yeah. Don't risk it. Never risk it. Never risk anything. But you've risked it. All the time. Every single time. I think that's the show, though. I live on the edge. You do, don't you? Yeah. What do you think you

should say at the end of the show? Oh, thanks everybody for listening. Number one, sending us your questions about terrible Netflix movies and chicken parmesan.

We love that. We do. But if you like the show, you want to get in contact with us. Don't. You can find us on Weekly Planet Pod on

Facebook and Gmail and Twitter and Bandcamp. Yes. Let's see. You can find us on Weekly Planet Pod on Facebook And Gmail and Twitter and Bandcamp Let's see you can go to Planetbroadcasting.com Sign up to our newsletter Planet Broadcasting, great mates Facebook group, we're in there Love having a chat You can follow at The Weekly Planet on Twitter

That's our friend Rob Collings Does a great job on the newsletter and the website And the group. Yes. I'm at WikipediaBrown on Twitter and also I'm on Instagram somewhere. That's true. I'm at MrSundayMovies on Twitter and Instagram MrSundayGram. Ooh.

Yeah. If you'd like to support the show, you can go to patreon.com slash MrSundayMovies. Yes. If you want to chuck in a buck. If you want to. Let's see. You can go to the Amazon affiliate link in our

episode description if you want to buy all the Harry Potter books and movies on DVD and Blu-ray and book

form if you want to buy them in book form they've got a new hardcover edition of the books

and they're releasing them and they've got pictures oh they're illustrated I think I'm going to get them very nice

you can do that and we get a kickback if you do it through our Amazon affiliate link correct we've also got releasing them and they've got pictures. Oh, they're illustrated. Yes, I'm saying nice. I think I'm going to get them. Very nice. You can do that and we get a kickback if you do it through our Amazon affiliate link. Correct, correct. We've also got t-shirts on tpublic.com. Yes. Thank you. Which is linked below also. Thank you to The Brute and The Basilisk

and Rackham for all our musical themes. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Um, um, um, um, um. Thank you to people who subscribe and rate on iTunes and various. And tell a friend. That's how that happens.

Definitely, yeah, yeah. And also, there's a Discord server. A lot of people have messaged me about it. They said, hey, we've got an official Weekly Planet and Planet Broadcasting Discord server. We'd highly recommend you check that out, even though we don't know what Discord is. We have no idea what it is. We could have looked it up, but we didn't. Yeah.

I think it's probably music related. What do you think? I agree. Or disagree. Could be video games. Whatever it is, that's what I think it is. Huh. Yeah.

Really, you've hedged your bets there somehow. I don't think so. I think it's brave. You meant to say brave, Mason. I did mean it, yeah. Now, next week, we're going to try and see the Meg, but it's not out here now. But the thing is, it is showing on Monday night. So next week's episode might be a little bit late if we record after we see the Meg on Monday night, if we decide to do that.

But that's up in the air at this point. Or ultimately, what we can do is if you're planning on seeing the Meg out there, follow us on Twitter. And if we don't see the Meg Meg don't see the Meg with us yes exactly so if you're in line if you've bought your tickets and you're going into the cinema see the Meg

check your Twitter first and if it says we haven't seen the Meg or ask us if we've seen the Meg ask us if we've seen the Meg if we haven't you tear up those tickets

you leave absolutely you run you never look back even though if we see it on Monday night we won't have seen the Meg yep the entirety of the weekend that's probably true but that's the rules Even though if we see it on Monday night, we won't have seen the Meg.

Yep. The entirety of the weekend. That's probably true. But that's the rules. All right. Thanks, everybody. Have a good time. All right.

Grabbed our jam, you guys. We will see you next week. Goodbye. This podcast is part of the Planet Broadcasting Network. Visit planetbroadcasting.com for more podcasts from our great mates. I mean, if you want. It's up to you.