The Weekly Planet - Batman VS Predator - Caravan Of Garbage

Episode Date: September 6, 2018

One time Batman fought the Predator and it was amazing.Video Version â–ºhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YKiAuiDyZTsTwitter â–º http://twitter.com/mrsundaymoviesFacebook â–º http://facebook.com/mrsunda...ymoviesBuy Batman vs Predator Amazon â–º https://amzn.to/31UlMdrPatreon â–º https://patreon.com/mrsundaymoviesT-Shirts/Merch â–º https://www.teepublic.com/stores/mr-sunday-moviesThe Weekly Planet iTunes â–º https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-weekly-planet/id718158767?mt=2&ign-mpt=uo%3D4The Weekly Planet YouTube â–º https://goo.gl/1ZQFGH Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Starting point is 00:00:55 This podcast is part of the Planet Broadcasting Network. Visit planetbroadcasting.com for more podcasts from our great mates. Hello, everyone. Welcome to Caravan of Garbage, where we look at a thing, sometimes it's's terrible sometimes it's the greatest comic ever written well i'm certainly looking forward to hearing about a terrible comic book well mason oh sorry i hadn't finished go ahead you'll be shocked to know that uh what we're looking at this week i think is a fantastic comic maybe because it's one of the it's when i started to get into comics properly i think you lent me a copy of this it's three issues yeah the first uh batman v predator series i say v now it's versus it's versus batman v superman has ruined versus for me it's the only
Starting point is 00:01:36 thing it's ruined that's right this was in the era though where predator was pretty much fighting everyone wasn't he yeah you couldn't stop him he was fighting pope everyone, wasn't he? Yeah, that's right. You couldn't stop him. He was fighting Popeye. No, he wasn't. I opened with an example. He was fighting Woody Woodpecker. He was fighting Steamboat Willie. That's right. He was fighting that wolf that sees a pretty lady
Starting point is 00:01:58 and its eyes go in her hearts and then the mouth opens and the tongue rolls out on the table. Yeah, Leary Wolf. Yeah, Leary Wolf. No, but he was. Because this was the year where Dark Horse Comics got the Alien license and the Predator license
Starting point is 00:02:12 and then went, hey, Alien versus Predator. And that blew up and then they're like, we should just verse everybody. Let's just do everybody all the time. Get all licenses and verse everything. There's Batman versus Aliens and Superman versus Aliens and Superman versus Aliens versus Predator. Robocop versus the Terminator. That's Batman versus aliens and Superman versus aliens and Superman versus aliens versus Predator. Robocop versus the Terminator.
Starting point is 00:02:27 That's it. They did them all. And then some. Anyway, this one opens with a boxing championship title fight in Gotham. Two of the men fighting, Mason. You're never going to believe this. They've both got mob bosses on their side. So it's basically two warring mob families.
Starting point is 00:02:41 Oh, does that happen a lot? Yeah, I guess it does. Going against each other cut to a man watching this in a trailer park a man his dog starts barking
Starting point is 00:02:49 goes outside gets killed he's like what's going on he gets the old three predator dots boom he's dead you know when you get
Starting point is 00:02:56 the three dots it's probably bad news not always generally give me an example when it isn't there's one in this comic oh okay right
Starting point is 00:03:03 so we'll get to it oh when he gets he gets the Predator dots and he hears the bang and then he's delivered a present. I remember that. You remembered my birthday, Predator. So the Predator notes on the television who the boxing winner is, the grand champion. It kind of takes a mental note of that.
Starting point is 00:03:21 So what he does, he goes to the boxing champion's celebration that he's having with his wife. He's lying in bed with his wife. He's having a bloody note of that. So what he does, he goes to the boxing champion's celebration that he's having with his wife. He's lying in bed with his wife. He's having a bloody great old time. He's like, I'm a good boxer and good on me. And we're married. Dear, you are a good boxer. Good on you.
Starting point is 00:03:34 When we are married, you're correct. So the predator crashes through the roof, nets him up. It's the cutty net. So you know he's in trouble. Slices him to the bone. This comic's quite grisly, if I recall. It is the, it's the cutty net. So you know he's in trouble. Slices him to the, to the bone. This movie, this,
Starting point is 00:03:45 this comic's quite grisly if I recall. It is. Especially for a Batman property. And it's also not just a Predator comic because a lot of this is mob boss stuff. Yeah, right. There's a lot of confusion about what's going on.
Starting point is 00:03:56 I think that's what sets it apart because there is the ultimate showdown between Batman and Predator. It's not all the way through. Yeah, right. They space it out enough. Anyway,
Starting point is 00:04:07 Bruce Wayne is canoodling with gangsters, right? In the high society. Because he likes to know what's going on, you know what I mean? But he looks up and he sees the bat signal and he's like, I'm not Batman, but I'm leaving. For unrelated reasons. Probably to do with crime, which I like. I mean, I like the crime you guys are doing, but there's probably more better crime somewhere else.
Starting point is 00:04:24 So I'm going to go to that. I'm going to do that. But you guys keep doing crime and telling me about the crime you guys are doing, but there's probably more better crime somewhere else. So I'm going to go to that. I'm going to do that. But you guys keep doing crime and telling me about the crime. Please do. And then I'll compare and contrast. And later in the week, I'll come back to you and tell you who's doing the better crime. So he goes off to- I'm not Batman.
Starting point is 00:04:37 He goes to the crime scene. And it's a disaster, Mason. There's blood everywhere. There's bodies strung up. It's no good. Everyone thinks it's a mob hit, right? Batman says, well, it seems like it's a disaster, basically. There's blood everywhere. There's bodies strung up. It's no good. Everyone thinks it's a mob hit, right? Batman says, well, it seems like, you know, it's open season. So he's changed to Batman in this.
Starting point is 00:04:51 Yeah, he's Batman. So he doesn't just turn up as Bruce Wayne. Hmm, what's this crime scene all about, Commissioner Gordon? It's me. Yeah. Playboy Bruce Wayne. But the Predator, though, he's watching, right? And he's kind of, you can see him taking an interest.
Starting point is 00:05:03 He's like, who's this bloody ghost? Is he using the thermal vision or not he is yeah he's using the thermal vision anyway so he goes to the other boxer Batman does
Starting point is 00:05:09 and he's all hey was this you guys you've been doing crimes tell me and so they set some boxes and they're like
Starting point is 00:05:15 we ain't telling you Batman because we know you don't like crime if we were going to tell anybody about crime we'd tell Bruce Wayne
Starting point is 00:05:22 and then Batman's like yes yes so he beats up some fighters or whatever he leaves the Predator's still watching and then to tell anybody about crime would tell Bruce Wayne. And then Batman's like, yes. Yes. So he beats up some fighters or whatever. He leaves. The Predator's still watching. And then Bruce is contemplating at home. He's like, what's happening here?
Starting point is 00:05:33 He goes, yeah, he knows he's figured a few things out. He knows he's heavy. He knows he's surgical. And he knows he's probably not an alien. He doesn't say that. Probably a fat surgeon. That's right. Probably a fat surgeon, right?
Starting point is 00:05:45 That's it. But he looks up again. Bat signal's in the- It's probably the Chunky Chopper. You know, Batman's- Yeah, his greatest nemesis, the Chunky Chopper. Yeah. Bat signal goes off.
Starting point is 00:05:55 He presumes it's the Chunky Chopper. Off he goes. The Predator, though, he's murdered the other boxers, which he just visited, and a bunch of mobsters around them. There's a blind guy there, though, who was ignored. And he goes, hey, the Predator said, I mean, whatever happened, something said to me, open season. And the weird thing was it sounded just like you, Batman.
Starting point is 00:06:18 And Batman's like, but I'm fairly confident I didn't do all these murders. Maybe Bruce Wayne did these murders. He loves crime. Then the Predator shoots the blind guy, which is kind of out of character, I feel. No, it isn't. I don't think it is. I know what you're talking about,
Starting point is 00:06:33 but I feel what the Predator is known for is pretending to be a good sport, but not actually being a good sport. Yeah, being a terrible sport. It's always like, yeah, I'll fight you one-on-one. Oh, you've defeated me. Well, I'm going to blow up this whole bloody town. You know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:06:47 You're not wrong. Anyway, Predator then, after shooting the blind guy, he lines up Batman with the three dots, but he doesn't shoot. Yeah, because he wants to fight him hand-to-hand. That's right. That's why. And then Batman is all, I understand these rules, I think.
Starting point is 00:07:03 I'm fairly confident. Anyway, so you find some rust flakes, and he goes to investigate a junkyard, which he's pretty confident they're from. I understand these rules, I think. I'm fairly confident. Anyway, so you find some rust flakes and he goes to investigate a junkyard, which he's pretty confident they're from. And meanwhile, the mob bosses are in meetings and they're like, who's killing all the men? Who's doing all these murders? Tell us.
Starting point is 00:07:18 Tell me. What's happening here? Who's he talking to? They're talking to each other. That's a conversation that was happening. Those were two different characters. Oh, I see. I was using the theater of the mind. Did that not work very well?
Starting point is 00:07:30 It's going to help with pictures. It'll help with pictures. We'll put some pictures in. Anyway, the Predator busts in. He's invisible and he's got a lot of space weapons. Again, poor sport. Poor sport. He just kills all of them, right?
Starting point is 00:07:41 Batman swoops in. Predator rears up. He's going to kill him. up he's gonna kill him uh then he's blasted with a shotgun out the window by one of the mob bosses probably sal maroney probably was i don't think it was uh batman realizes probably matches malone no no i can't think of another one though so yes uh batman realizes he's bleeding's bleeding, you know, because he's got that green blood. He follows him to the junkyard, and he finds the remains of a bunch of people.
Starting point is 00:08:09 He finds, like, the hands of the boxers or whatever. Predator shows up. They tussle. Batman gets... Trounced. Trounced is the word you're looking for. I mean, he drops a bunch of junk on him from a magnet, but Batman gets, like, stabbed and and blasted and he's down.
Starting point is 00:08:25 He's in real bloody trouble, mate. So what he does, he signals the Batmobile and it rolls in, knocking the Predator out of the way. He's about to get in the car and escape. Then he gets stabbed again. But then he's out of there. Okay, that's fine. He makes it out of there.
Starting point is 00:08:40 Then the Predator murders some other mob guys. That's fine. Sure, yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, if he's not doing anything else, he's like, well, I blocked out this afternoon for killing Batman,
Starting point is 00:08:49 but if he's not around, I guess I'll kill everybody else. So they fire up the bat signal again to bring Batman down, but he's a no-show. So they cut to Bruce Wayne.
Starting point is 00:08:59 Because he's a coward, probably. He's a coward, probably. But they cut to Bruce Wayne and he's just fucked up. Like, full body cast. That's weird. What was he doing?
Starting point is 00:09:06 Do you think he was skiing? It might have been skiing. He's probably skiing, yeah. That's what they do, isn't it? Billionaires. They name his injuries. Deep puncture wounds, extensive lacerations, third degree burns, severe concussions. Just concussion?
Starting point is 00:09:20 Can concussions be plural? I don't think it can. I think that's probably a typo. Concussion. No, that's on my behalf. No, there's no typo. I just think it can. I think that's probably a typo. Concussion. No, that's on my behalf. No, there's no typo. I just said concussions. Let's say there's a typo.
Starting point is 00:09:29 Anyway, so Predator kills another mobster. They call Batman again. It's been a week. He doesn't answer. Gordon then, Commissioner Gordon calls Alfred. And Alfred's like, can I help you? And Gordon's like, oh, I just thought that maybe Bruce Wayne might know where Batman is. And Alfred's like, nah, I just thought that maybe Bruce Wayne might know where Batman is. And Alfred's like, nah, Bruce Wayne's...
Starting point is 00:09:47 Bruce Wayne likes crime. Master Bruce likes crime. He doesn't like the reverse of crime. Don't you know anything, Commissioner Gordon? What's wrong with you? You silly man. But he goes, nah, Bruce Wayne's not here anyway. He's bloody out of town.
Starting point is 00:09:59 Probably skiing. He's injury-free, out-of-town skiing. Skiing, yeah. Yeah, yeah. So Gordon goes on TV and he's like, Hey, Batman! There's a lot of people dying. Why don't you get your dumb ass into the city and help us out?
Starting point is 00:10:13 But the newscaster reports Batman has deserted Gotham. And then you see a picture of the Predator and he's got his hands up. You know, he does that thing. He goes, I've done it! I'm the Predator! Success arms! Yeah, I get it.
Starting point is 00:10:25 Yay. Also, bloody thanks for nothing, Gotham City. You know what I mean? You're welcome for all the times I've saved the city. Yeah, exactly. You're abandoning me now. I mean, I've beaten Egghead. I've beaten Crazy Quilt. I've beaten all the greats.
Starting point is 00:10:40 No respect. No respect. You get beaten by the Predator once. That's a big jump. Imagine fighting Egghead and then you have to fight the Pred once that's a big jump imagine fighting Egghead and then you have to fight the predator do you mean Batman
Starting point is 00:10:48 or me do I either yeah I guess either way it's kind of a jump I feel like you could probably beat Egghead I could probably beat Egghead
Starting point is 00:10:53 yeah yeah so anyway Batman calls Gordon he's like listen I'm fine he's not he's in real bad shape but he goes
Starting point is 00:10:59 the killer I don't think he's off this world I mean obviously you should call some space cops also you saw him he attacked you he was right there he's clearly an alien he's off this world. I mean, obviously. You should call some space cops. Also, you saw him. He attacked you. He was right there. He's clearly an alien.
Starting point is 00:11:08 He's got green blood. That's it, yeah. So he goes, but you're next, Gordon. You're probably next on the list for some reason. I know that. Because you're an old guy. That's right. It goes, world's greatest non-powered vigilante, some old dude.
Starting point is 00:11:20 I think he'd fight Superman. Yeah, you'd think he would. So there's a knock at the door. It's the Predator. He's nearly going to kill Gordon. He knocked he would. So there's a knock at the door. It's the Predator. He's nearly going to kill Gordon. He knocked at the door? There's a knock at the door. Yeah, something like that.
Starting point is 00:11:30 He hears a noise or whatever. And then another officer shoots him. Another officer shoots him. Oh, shaving a haircut two bits. That's it. And then Batman and the Predator have a phone conversation somehow. They talk to each other. I can't remember what's said, but it's probably like,
Starting point is 00:11:47 come and fight me so I can throw my hands up. Yeah, that's right. Batman though, he's all in now. He's like, now I'm ready. I'm ready to do this. Alfred says to Batman, look, your eyesight's really bad. It's mostly not there. You have a concussion.
Starting point is 00:12:00 You've got multiple injuries. But Batman's like- That's so many concussions. Upwards of two. But he goes, Batman's like, I've got multiple injuries. But Batman's like... That's so many concussions. Upwards of two. But he goes... Batman's like, I've got some tech. I'll be fine. That's fine.
Starting point is 00:12:09 I've got a good feeling about this in general. I can't see what I'm putting on, but I'm pretty sure some of this will be useful. So he goes to the GCPD rooftop. It's mostly the Shafi's sweet new armor. Oh, my God. You remember the armor? Yes.
Starting point is 00:12:21 It's got no eyes. It's all metal and... Oh, so good. It's crazy. I really like it.. It's all metal and armored. Oh, so good. It's crazy. I really like it. I feel it's Dark Knight Returns inspired, but it's also its own thing. Yeah. It's sweet as.
Starting point is 00:12:32 But it's weird because it doesn't have eyes. I guess it's got some kind of infrared setup or whatever. I think it's got ultrasound. Like a bat. Okay, like a bat. That makes sense. Anyway, so the cops are there and they're like, fucking good luck, idiot, with your eyeless suit.
Starting point is 00:12:46 Batman, you think you're going to come out the better out of this, but you haven't put any eye holes in it, all right? Mate. How'd you even get here? Mate, what are you doing? Did you put that on up here? Mate. Mate.
Starting point is 00:13:01 But he can see. The predator rolls up and they tangle on the roof and the armor can deflect the Predator's lasers and he stabs the Predator in the shoulder. There's a whole lot going on. They tumble down onto the street.
Starting point is 00:13:13 Predator calls Batman a loser. But then after he says that, he gets hit by the Batmobile again, which is pretty good. And Batman takes off in the car and the Predator's on the roof. This is the brawl, basically. It's a great brawl i recommend it not being in it you'll die i will absolutely die so survive a brawl with egghead but this is the best i can't i can't do this most certainly not
Starting point is 00:13:36 anyway so they stop for a bit uh for orange slices that's right hang on wait just just a minute all right hang on so uh bat Batman uses the lots of bats trick. He's so good at that. He loves that, doesn't he? At what point do you feel this is cheating? For who? Which one? For Batman.
Starting point is 00:13:54 At no point. Okay, all right. I think it's fine. I think with the Predator, it's fair game. It's all fair game. Okay. Yeah, yeah. I guess his line is if his suit just had a gun in it.
Starting point is 00:14:03 Yeah, exactly. That's probably it. I guess that would be, yeah. But anyway, he drops him into the Bat his suit just had a gun in it. Yeah, exactly. I guess that would be, yeah. But anyway, he drops him into the Batcave and he locks him into a cage and it's like titanium bars or whatever. And he's like, now you just see out your bloody days here. But the Predator sets off his bomb and Batman hears the ticking or whatever or the bleep blooping. Was he just going to let him die?
Starting point is 00:14:21 Just rot there for a hundred years? I don't know what his plan was. Yeah, right. But Batman's like, well, that looks bad. That looks like a bomb probably. So I guess I'll just let him out and we'll continue to fight. So he'll turn off his bomb. So he lets him out.
Starting point is 00:14:34 They're in the Batman cave now. The Batman cave, yeah. The hunter's on Mason. Who's hunting who? They're just hitting each other. They're just hitting each other, yeah. They're just hitting each other, yeah. At this point, they're bloody exhausted. They've both been hit by swords
Starting point is 00:14:49 and cars, you know? And lasers and nets. Oh my god. Batman, though, he gets pinned under his giant penny, right? So he's stuck there. He's about to be gutted. You've heard about being hoisted on your own petard. Imagine being pinned by your own penny.
Starting point is 00:15:06 Very embarrassing for you. We hear like a ahem off panel. Would you say it's a British ahem? It's very much so a British ahem. The most British ahem there is. So Alfred's standing there. He's got an old timey gun. It's a blunderbuss. It is a blunderbuss. The bloody kablam
Starting point is 00:15:21 says the text. Those are the exact words. It's got two A's. Three A's, but two of them are together. It's a big kablam. Gets him real good. So he grabs Alfred and he's about to kill Alfred, but Batman had tranked him a couple of times, so he's all woozy and hazy. This is where it gets a bit cheating,
Starting point is 00:15:38 if I guess I had to pick a point. He's got a whole lot of horse tranquilizer in him. So Predator stumbles out of the house and Batman takes off his helmet and he's like, I know I've got this. Let me just grab my most powerful weapon. And he takes a wooden baseball bat. Oh, that's right.
Starting point is 00:15:52 And he follows the Predator outside and just... Just wallops him with a baseball bat. That's great stuff. It's brutal. He's completely got the upper hand. He's pretty much won the fight. There's a big light in the sky though. It's an alien ship. It's the Predator's completely got the upper hand. He's pretty much won the fight. There's a big light in the sky, though. It's an alien ship.
Starting point is 00:16:07 It's the Predator ship. They come down. Eight Predators march out. Bruce Wayne's bat. Wait. Bruce Wayne bat? Wait a minute. What?
Starting point is 00:16:15 Bruce Wayne's friends with Batman? So they grab Bruce Wayne and they pull him aside. They're like, just watch this. It's okay. Predator. Quiet word. Quiet word, mate. Come here, mate. like, just watch this. It's okay. This is quite weird. Quite weird, mate. Come here, mate.
Starting point is 00:16:27 Mate, just look. Our mate's had a few. Yeah, you need to see this, right? You should probably check this out. So the Predator kills itself on a sweet pirate sword or something. It's a sword from the past. And they're like, here, Batman, you get this sword. Well done on whatever happened here.
Starting point is 00:16:42 Yeah. We're going to presume you're the winner of this debacle, we're going to call it. We'll call it a debacle. There's a mutual understanding, I guess. You know, they're kind of like a, it's a bit of a pat on the back for Batman because he's pretty good.
Starting point is 00:16:57 Good on you, mate. Yeah. Good for you. Good stuff, buddy. They bail. Yeah, nice. They're out of there. And then Batman is all, they're not coming back.
Starting point is 00:17:05 You know, I killed their champion. I'm the best. I'm the best guy. They know that there's someone here protecting Gotham, though there's at least two sequels to this comic. There slowly is, yeah. Yeah, which I haven't read, but presumably they're not as good as this
Starting point is 00:17:19 because this is great. It's really good. Yeah. And Alfred says something like, it's a hunter's moon or something. Bam is like shut up Alfred. It's a great comic.
Starting point is 00:17:30 It is. It really is. I think what it comes down to is it's more than just a tussle and when they get to the tussle it's fantastic. For sure.
Starting point is 00:17:37 Anyway this has been Caravan of Garbage. Oh what? It's not always garbage though is it Mason? No. Sometimes it's a great comic. We do these every Tuesday.
Starting point is 00:17:45 If you've got something to recommend, please do. It can be a comic, it can be a TV show, it can be a movie, it can be a video game, be whatever you want. A board game. It can't be a board game. It could be a board game. It could be a board game. We can make that happen.
Starting point is 00:17:55 We might be able to do that, yeah. No shots of our faces, though. Just a locked camera on a board game on a floor and just hands rolling dice sounds great swearing from off camera that's what we're gonna do i'm excited for it me too there's also a video version of this if you want to check that out which i'd highly recommend oh yeah i also have a podcast called the weekly planet where we talk movies and comics and tv shows that comes out every morning it might be a little fun thing you'd like to listen to. You said it comes out every morning. Every Monday morning.
Starting point is 00:18:25 I just want to be clear, it doesn't come out every morning. It comes out every morning if you only wake up on a Monday. It's pretty grim. But it's not untrue, is it? It's not untrue. But thanks for listening to this. Grabbed our gem, you guys. We'll see you next week.
Starting point is 00:18:40 Goodbye. This podcast is part of the Planet Broadcasting Network. Visit planetbroadcasting.com for more podcasts from our great mates i mean if you want it's up to you fx is the veil explores the surprising and fraught relationship between two women who play a deadly game of truth and lies on the road from Istanbul to Paris and London. One woman has a secret. The other, a mission to reveal it before thousands of lives are lost.
Starting point is 00:19:12 FX's The Veil, starring Elizabeth Moss, is now streaming on Disney+.

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