The Weekly Planet - Doom 2005 - Caravan Of Garbage

Episode Date: March 5, 2020

In anticipation of Doom Eternal we take a look at the first Doom movie from 2005 (yes there's two) starring Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson Karl Urban and Rosamund Pike. It really held the bar in terms of video game adaptations and by that I mean because it's not very good. Thanks for listening!Help support the show and decide on episodes at Patreon ► https://patreon.com/mrsundaymoviesVideo Edition ► https://youtu.be/eQeZZMov1WcJames' Twitter ► http://twitter.com/mrsundaymoviesMaso's Twitter ► http://twitter.com/wikipediabrownTWP Itunes ► https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-weekly-planet/id718158767?mt=2&ign-mpt=uo%3D4TWP Direct Download ► https://play.acast.com/s/theweeklyplanetTWP YouTube Channel ► https://goo.gl/1ZQFGHPatreon ► https://patreon.com/mrsundaymoviesAmazon Affiliate Link ► https://amzn.to/2nc12P4T-Shirts/Merch ► https://www.teepublic.com/stores/mr-sunday-movies Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

FX's The Veil explores the surprising and fraught relationship between two women who play a deadly game of truth and lies on the road from Istanbul to Paris and London. One woman has a secret, the other a mission to reveal it before thousands of lives are lost. FX's The Veil, starring Elizabeth Moss, is now streaming on Disney+. This podcast is part of the Planet Broadcasting Network. Visit planetbroadcasting.com for more podcasts from our great mates. We're getting another Doom game, and the Doom games are good now. They're good Doom games. Doom, first Doom, reboot Doom, very good.

You know what's never been good? Go ahead. Any of the Doom movies. Probably the new one, which I haven't seen yet, but apparently it's no good. It doesn't look good from the trailer, but Doom movies. Probably the new one, which I haven't seen yet, but apparently it's no good. It doesn't look good from the trailer. But Doom 2005. What a triumph in terms of casting and that alone.

There's nothing else good about this movie. First of all, if people could leave this video a like, that'd be fantastic. But I just want to say, you got The Rock, you got a Rosamund Pike, you got a Carl Urban. Oh, they're all looking so thin and chiseled. Exactly. The Rock is so thin in this movie.

Did you notice? I mean, comparatively, sure. Yeah, I mean, he's still huge. He's still a huge unit, but he's the size of one fridge, not two fridges. Sure. Doug Jones. Yep. Dexter Fletcher.

From Press Gang. Did you know that? Yeah, so that's all. You directed Rocket Man. And he also stepped in the last minute to save that Freddie Mercury movie, which it sucks as a movie. It's not a good movie. I'm not going to get into it.

All right. Great performance. It was in lock stock. It was. Also, do you know Rosamund Pike actually turned down the role of Rita Skeeter from Harry Potter? Remember the journalist? She's like, I'm writing sexy journalism about teens or whatever.

I remember that. To work on this movie and also Pride and Prejudice. Do you think that was a good move? Do you think she was contractually obligated to work on one because she was working on the other? And if so, which is which? Was she like, I really want to work on Doom, and they're like, we have to do Pride and Prejudice as well.

And she's like, oh, fine. If I had to guess, I'd say the Harry Potter and Pride and Prejudice were probably shot in England, so you could do them back to back, and Doom was probably, I don't know, shot in a warehouse in Vancouver. It was absolutely shot in a warehouse, yeah. Anyway, they should have called this movie Crap Aliens. Absolutely. Because it's just aliens, but much worse.

I mean, I remember watching this movie and thinking it was pretty average. And this rewatch, it is much worse than pretty average. It drags the number one premise. The number one reason I went into Doom the movie in theatres was because I love the premise of Doom the games, which is there's a scientific outpost on the moons of Mars that opens a gateway to hell. And what does this movie do?

Everybody gets an extra chromosome, is the premise of this movie. For good or ill. That's right. Mostly ill. Yes. Yeah, so this was apparently in development since 1999. Arnold was going to be involved at one point. And it went through a whole bunch of different studios, I think.

Yes. Somebody bought the option and then it just expired. Like, it seems odd to me, especially nowadays, where games cost hundreds of millions of dollars. But even then, like, Doom has always been this kind of triple-A title. Everybody looks forward to it. It's a hell of a series. This movie was just made on the cheap for some reason.

They're like, let's not invest any money into this. Well, it's not that cheap. We'll talk about the budget towards the end. It looks cheap. The budget of this might actually shock you. But it's kind of more based on Doom 3 in the sense that it's mostly in darkened corridors with a few monsters here and there. There's some flashlights.

There's some flashlights as well. There's plenty of flashlights. But even then, Doom 3 is about opening a portal to hell. Yep. And again, is it too silly? That's a bit silly. You know what happened? When I first went into the cinema, I remember watching this and going, okay, it's not looking too great, but let's see where this unfolds and then they meet dexter fletch's character and he's like just

call me pinky and i remember because in doom one of the grunt monsters that you see hundreds and hundreds of times is pinky which is this enormous kind of pink cloven footed monster that charges at you and i remember thinking kind of like a big mean cow yeah i remember thinking oh they're just they're just going to reference a couple of things and they're not going to actually put them in the movie. Okay, it's going to be one of these kind of adaptations. I hate it and it's not going to get any better. It's one of those,

well, that's a bit silly and we know better kind of situations, isn't it? Yeah, and guess what you didn't know better? Yeah. Though I will say this, the Dexter Fletcher character, he does turn into a version of Pinky, I guess. Well, I mean, he turns into a slightly pink-hued monster. Yes, but I do like the effect where he's missing his legs

and he's rolling around on that chair. That's quite a good effect. Pretty impressive. And I give it to Dexter Fletcher for making that happen. Do you think on set he was just in like an office chair, like a swivel chair? I would say almost certainly, yes. Here's some things, though. Whee!

I love movies. Whee, inn love movies Whee! Isn't it? Because he's from England He is Saw him in a market once I've talked about it Anyways here's some elements

That I've written down That it keeps Of the Doom lore Okay Not all bad Mason Mars That's definitely in there Maps of a facility

Oh my god Is that ever in there Some monsters We get imps And hell knights And pinkies, one. One pinky, sure. Pinky, pink eye.

Well, I mean, we get soldiers that are kind of, we get people who are kind of zombified. Yes. That's what we get. Yeah, absolutely. So like most zombie movies. But the other thing is they are these creatures, I guess, in name only because they don't shoot projectiles.

The zombified humans don't wield weapons, really. Oh, here's some other things. We get portals, sort of, like in Doom, the game, but this time it's a big gloopy portal. It's a big gloopy portal and it floats in the air and then you stick your head into it and it sucks you all the way in. Yes. And you end up somewhere else.

That's right. We get the BFG. This is on the Doom Wikipedia for this movie. Okay. The explosions of the BFG appear more like a giant ball of corrosive mucus rather than the massive green energy blast like in the games. And embarrassment.

I bet when they fired that off in the cinema, there were big Doom fans in the audience who just went, Boo! Not like Doom, the game. Why isn't it green? Wear big green ball! I've got some information here on the guns as well, because they only fire that three times,

one of which is off camera. Okay. That's what you go there for. The chainsaw only fires up for about 10 seconds in total, and it's only used in one scene. A shotgun is only fired four times. That's my go-to weapon in a Doom game. Oh, my God.

And what appears to be a plasma rifle is never fired. Embarrassing. But you know what it does have that Doom, the game, and this have in common? Is it a first-person action sequence? You know it is. What do you think? Bad. Awful.

I don't think it's terrible. It's not the worst part of this movie. Because again, this was in the era. I was going to say, this is in an era where they had to include some element of the game in every video game adaptation. But we're still in that era. Yes, sure. They still're still in that era. Yes. They still have to keep doing that.

So, in the words of Carl Urban from the time, he said, In some ways, it makes cinematic history in that, for the first time, the audience becomes the hero of the film. When we go into first person, the audience is doing the rampage. The audience is doing the work. And that is so cool. It's insane. The audience is doing the rampage. Have you ever seen a thing in a movie? I remember at the time, I remember the audience is doing the rampage have you ever seen

i think i remember at the time we all i remember the audience in hushed tones were like wow we are all doing the rampage right now the problem with this movie i think is and i and i look i i sort of understand why they did it is they had to they decided they needed to introduce characters right this movie whereas the doom marine maybe more than any other video game character is not meant to be a personality no he's meant to be like the very epitome of the player you insert yourself into the game yes we know we really know nothing about this character and they're like all right let's make it carl urban then yeah he's and he's and he's torn up by past traumas no the doom marine is not torn up by past trauma he loves trauma if anything that's

right he revels in it He loves being torn up and tearing up others That's all he loves Have you ever watched a movie though? No Okay This is my first experience and I loved it It was like I was doing the rampage

Let's say you It was insane Alright Let's say you'd seen a movie before Okay yeah Have you ever watched a movie and thought to yourself First person or not This is me I'm doing this No You'd seen a movie before, right? Okay, yeah. Have you ever watched a movie and thought to yourself, first person or not, this is me.

I'm doing this. No. Although I think people do. I don't know if they... I think you can relate to a character. Yeah. But I don't think it's the same level of immersion as a video game where you kind of feel like you're doing the actions or having an impact. Have you ever gone to the football?

Oh, sure. And you see somebody who's brought their own football. Sure. They think they're the player. It's the same thing. Sometimes it's just a father and son having a bloody kick-off at the game, Mason. Sometimes it's a lone wolf. They both think they're Wayne Carey?

Yep. Terrible human Wayne Carey? Absolutely, yes. It's a local reference. Don't worry about it, everyone. We'll insert an American version in the visuals. That's right, yeah. The other thing about this, aside from the variety of weaponry you get in the video games

I like the variety of monsters Where's the cyber demon? Where's that weird goat monster? Where's the spider mastermind? The arachnotron? Exactly His little brother None of these things make an appearance

I don't want to see generic kind of zombified whatevers You go for the doom monsters And you stay for the doom monsters Because you love the doom monsters And the guns But also the monsters That's what itvers. You go for the Doom monsters and you stay for the Doom monsters because you love the Doom monsters and the guns, but also the monsters. That's what it said on the back of the box. I've come for the Doom monsters, but I've stayed for the Doom monsters. IGN. That's what it said.

Okay, so there's an element of this where they discover some kind of genetic abnormality where if you put it into a person, they'll either turn into a gross, hideous monster that shoots its own tongue or something and infects others and becomes evil but if you're a good person deep down in your soul maybe then you become carl urban but stronger yes carl urban but stronger what's that about and who came up with this who was like you know what we could just have hell monsters yeah or let's invent a whole new story element to this universe which involves chromosomes.

I feel also they shoehorn their own lore into this ineffectually because The Rock is a very good guy until he's just like, I'm going to kill everybody. This is a quarantine zone. I'll kill women and children and anybody I want to kill. My teeth are so white. Do you notice how teeth are so white? Oh my God, he's so white.

So thin, teeth so white. The Rock, 2005. A haiku. He's got teeth as white as the whitest fridge. Yeah. So I feel like there it doesn't even make sense. And aside from that, the Dexter Fletcher character, who also turns into a monster, shows himself to be not a terrible person.

Like, I guess he laughs at a person's kind of misfortune at one point, but he's trying to save others and things like that. And then it's just like, man, whatever. We need a monster to block a door. I guess he's a monster now. Yeah, that's it. I also wonder if maybe this was a different movie and then they slapped Doom on it.

Oh, right, okay. Because that would make more sense, right? No, I think it was this long gestating idea that they were going to make. I mentioned earlier that Schwarzenegger was going to do it. Yeah, that didn't get off the ground because there was this real life incident at the time where two teenagers who had played the video game were then playing around with a chainsaw and there was a terrible, terrible accident. Shouldn't play with a chainsaw.

Unless you're one of those juggling chainsaw guys. Then you got it. You keep going. Then you must. You simply must. I wanted to ask you this though because we know you love a minigun. Hear it, whatever this is. There's some minigun minutes in this your famous segment meso's minigun little bit disappointing i mean they did chew up some they did chew up some zombies so that's

pretty good but i think a lot of it they kept the muzzle below the frame right did you notice that yeah like they and i think it's just it was just to save on money and bullets remember they had it just propped on a box because they were like, this is so heavy. The Rock? Do you think The Rock found it too heavy? Well, he was so lean in 2005, so it's entirely possible, yes. That's true, maybe. Maybe after this movie he was so shamed, he's like, I'm going to be able to lift a minigun

with one hand after this. I'm going to become the biggest man of all time. Okay, budget. We're talking budget. What would you guesstimate it was? In 2005 dollars? Sure. $50 million. It was $60. You were close. I're talking budget. What would you guesstimate it was? In 2005 dollars? Sure. $50 million.

It was $60. You were close. Yeah, that's pretty close. So you'd think with a budget like this, this would look like a better movie. Like a movie that would be released in theatres and not a student film, sure. What's another movie from 2005 that looks good? Batman Begins. Sure, yeah. That looks great. And that was $10 million.

How much was batman begins christopher nolan paid the studio to make that movie it was made on the smell of an oily rag and the goodwill of the people it was made on the smell of a chip sandwich christopher nolan's favorite lunch and dinner okay the batman begins was 150 million dollars that is not a good example they could have made three dooms for that definitely but should they have no yeah so despite being made at a relatively low-ish cost i guess it only made 58 million worldwide and i think the problem is like you talked about it doesn't appeal to people who are hardcore fans of the series and this series has nothing but hardcore fans especially in 2005 you know like

doom 3 it did okay but it wasn't like a phenomenon like one and two that's true yeah and if anybody's gonna go out to the cinema and see it it's it's those massive massive fans exactly and i guess fans of the nano wall sure the concept of the nano wall the nano wall a wall that you can walk through sometimes but then sometimes you can't and then sometimes it's permeable and then sometimes it's permeable, and then sometimes it's a solid wall. But then sometimes when you're running away from monsters, it takes a very long time to become a solid wall. So it adds some tension. I think that's rule one of screenwriting,

is if you don't have any tension in your script, add a nano wall, right? Yeah, that's probably, yeah, that's not incorrect. I think they could just put a door in. Oh, yeah, a door? Like just swings open. Because then you're like, close the door! And then you're trying to close the door.

But there's zombies on the other side of the door. Exactly. So it's hard to close the door. It's harder to close the door, exactly. I mean, it is the year 2017 in this movie. I have no idea. Look, it's certainly far enough in the future that they have nanowalls, but they still have those monitors that are like CRT monitors.

Oh, yeah. The size of a bloody microwave. Absolutely. Because there is that scene where, what's his name? Devin Destructor or something? Mr. Destruction? Who's Mr. Destruction?

Ah, he's... Is he Joe Chill from Batman Begins? No. He's the guy who swings the monitor around. Do you remember that scene? I really don't. I should point out, I watched this movie over a period of three weeks

in 20-minute breaks. Okay, right. So my comprehension of this movie is a little spotty at best. Okay, well, there is a scene where Mr. Destruction, which is what I'm going to call him, or the Devastator or something, that's his code name. Okay. He is trapped in a room with a giant zombie,

and in order to defeat him, he picks up one of the very large microwave-sized CRT monitors that we all got rid of. Very good. Like a decade ago or more, and he swings it by a cord like it's a mace, and he belts the demon with it. You don't remember that scene?

I don't remember that at all, but I do know that. It's the best scene in the movie. He's the destroyer. There we go. Even better than the nanowall. Even better than the first-person shooting part. Yep. Yeah, great.

Reminded me of off space. Made me happy. Sure. Okay, so the director of this went on to make, I'm sure to nobody's surprise, 2009's The Legend of Chun-Li, which might also be the worst video game adaptation. That's one of the worst. Yeah. But at least he knows his strengths, making a bad video game movie.

That movie's not even as good as the 90s one. I mean, the 90s one now is kind of funny and schlocky and colourful and dumb. I just don't understand movies anymore, Mason. That's what Doom has done to you. Do you think we should... Well, clearly you don't because it took you three weeks to watch this one. Do you think we should go in... It's not that you don't understand movies,

it's just you don't understand how to watch a movie. That might be true. Do you think we should go in on Doom Annihilation, the new one? Yes. Is it out yet? Yeah, we probably should. It is actually, yeah. Yes. Maybe it out yet? Yeah, we probably should. It is actually, yeah. Yes.

Maybe it's better. Yeah. At least they're going to hell, I assume. Maybe. What's your favourite? I mean, this one they did say go to hell, which is quite... That's very true. That's a good reference.

What's your favourite Doom thing? If you had to put this aside, what's your favourite Doom thing? Oh. Probably Shoddies. Oh, I meant game, but sure. Okay, right. The new, the reboot. I mean, at this point, Doom Eternal isn't out yet. Yes.

But, man, it's so good. It is. It's a great game. I didn't think, I was like, well, this will be a heartless retread. Yeah. But, man, it is. It's pretty metal. It's pretty metal.

I agree. It is pretty metal. But within that, Shoddies. Absolutely. I think I'm a sucker for the first Doom, because that's the one that I played the most. Or, at the very least, the shareware version, which had like the first chapter. Oh, yeah. Again and again and again.

Yeah. Anyway, it sucks. It sucks as a movie. And we're sorry that we had to watch it. Yeah, we are actually. Yeah. But you know what? It's better than always knowing, isn't it?

It's better than always wondering, isn't it? That's not incorrect. You know, just being like, man, you remember Doom? That was pretty average. Maybe we should re-watch it one day. Now we know it was worse than average. Absolutely it is. Anyway, this has been Caravan of Garbage.

We do this every week. We also have videos here every Sunday, Tuesday, and Thursday. If you've got a suggestion for Caravan of Garbage, what is it? Video game, movie, comic, TV series? Well, look at it. Doom again. No. We'll re-watch Doom again for your pleasure. It'll take me another six months to get at it. Doom again. No. We'll re-watch Doom again.

For your pleasure. It'll take me another six months to get through it. We'll do it. If that's what the public demands. I'm curious to know what people think of this movie or what's their favourite Doom thing in general because surely it's not this. Absolutely not.

But if it is, we want to hear from you. We'll interview you. That's what we'll do next time. We'll get you on the show just to make fun of you. We don't mind. Also, this might be interesting. Here's a hint towards next week's episode. Just a little hint, mate.

All right, I'm ready. Yeah. Are you going to put this bit in? No, this bit will be. Oh, nice. Maybe I'll put this in the extended audio bit. Oh, my God. This is some bonus material for just those people.

This is a bit of double sizzle. Even I'm blindsided by this. The thing is, as well, I don't know what it is either because the order of this often gets changed. So in the video, they'll have a version. We're all going to get blindsided. But in this, it's just like I can't say what it is, I don't know what it is either because the order of this often gets changed. So in the video, they'll have a version. We're all going to get blindsided. But in this, it's just like I can't say what it is. I don't know.

Do you know though? I don't know. Are you trying to trick me? Why would I? I don't know. I mean, I guess regardless of what it is, I'm still going to have to watch it in advance. Sure.

Anyways, we also have a podcast called The Weekly Planet where we talk movies and comics and TV shows. That comes out every Monday morning. You want something to listen to on the commute to work? Yes. School? Yes. Just staying at home?

Yep. Then you can listen to that podcast. I do all kinds of things. That's right. We talk the news of the week and then also like a topic. Nice. Not Derm again, obviously. Maybe Derm though.

Yeah, maybe. If it comes up. All right. Goodbye, everyone. Grab that jam, you guys. We'll see you next week. This podcast is part of the Planet Broadcasting Network. Visit planetbroadcasting.com for more podcasts from our great mates.

I mean, if you want. It's up to you. As women, our life stages come with unique risk factors, like high blood pressure developed during pregnancy, which can put us two times more at risk of heart disease or stroke. Know your risks. Visit heartandstroke.ca. FX's The Veil explores the surprising and fraught relationship between two women who play a deadly game of truth and lies on the road from Istanbul to Paris and London. One woman has a secret,

the other a mission to reveal it before thousands of lives are lost. FX's The Veil, starring Elizabeth Moss, is now streaming on Disney+.