The Worst Idea Of All Time - 28: Milk Bar

Episode Date: July 18, 2023

Tim and Guy are reunited after two weeks apart from each other and the Fast Franchise. Tim has been watching Fast and Furious 6 in increments, while riding a bike around Auckland. Guy has been watching it while archiving his favourite t-shirts for future use. It would be fair to say the movie is not being given the respect it deserves. The fellaz dig into American conversational technique (again???), the modern price of t-shirts, new rules for old underwear and the origins of The Rock. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Music 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 Um, look. Oh. We're here. Yeah. And we've watched Furious 6 again. Do you know for what time? Can you tell me?

Yeah. And I know that because you wrote it in the calendar appointment for us to record this episode of the podcast. You wrote F6 brackets 4 and it's a good system. Yeah. for us to record this episode of the podcast. You're already at six brackets four, and it's a good system. It's a system that's been going a long time now, and I appreciate it. Yeah, I've got a system in place.

The system is movie number, and then watch number in parentheses. Yeah, it's not perfect. Although in saying that, I'm trying to think of a flaw with it. Yeah, I think it's perfect. I think you've invented a perfect system for us to keep track of how many times we've seen Furious 6.

And other Furious films. Can I ask you this, Tim? What are examples? Can you give me an example of, unrelated to us, a system that you think of as perfect and a system that you think of as fatally flawed. Well, the thing... Like, what is a system?

Here's what you learn in physics, man. There's no perfect systems because of entropy. Except the one you have created on our calendars to remind us of what watch we're looking at. Could that entropy? I guess it could if something happens to your brain or um google calendar and is that a fault of the system or is that a fault of i guess technically that is a fault of the system because the system relies on these external factors i guess so i guess

so do you know i once saw a man wearing a t-shirt that said i'm not perfect but i'm so damn close it scares the shit out of me and that's how i feel about this that's really a man wearing a t-shirt that said, I'm not perfect, but I'm so damn close it scares the shit out of me. And that's how I feel about this. That's a great t-shirt. It's not a bad t-shirt. I'd get that. I wouldn't wear it though. I'd like to have it, but I don't think I'd wear it.

Seems like more of a guy shirt. It does. And I'm a guy's guy. And that's what I call my fans. Guys, guys. Yeah, it's such a good name for your fans, man. And guys, girls. And guys, they, them.

Tim, I saw another T-shirt, which I saw more recently. Yes. And it was a T-shirt that said, Wife, you just hear whatever you want to hear. Husband, yes, I would like more beer. On a shirt. And it almost works. Man, shirts got too easy to print.

That's the problem. Shirts got too easy to make, manufacture, print, distribute around the world. And so this fucking bar of what should be on a shirt now is criminally low. That shouldn't be on any shirt. I don't want to throw the word. Shirts are like seven bucks now. It's disgusting. Shirt shouldn't be on any shirt i don't want to i want to throw the words like seven bucks now

it's disgusting should be seven dot too cheap should not be seven dollars how okay how much should a shirt cost and who should be allowed to decide what goes on the shirt should be about um about 40 bucks yeah and i think that nzd nzd yeah so uh american That'd be $25 And so The market should decide Slogans that are good enough To justify being on a $40 Slash $25

Who's on the panel Shirt It's I'm saying the market Will decide Right now the market Is deciding based on The fact that shirts

Are $7 And frankly It shows It's atrocious What's going on out there. I actually went through all of my... How many fucking words is that one that you just said? With the wife and the beer and the...

It's too many words. It's not as many as you think. It fit on the front and it didn't look squashed. Wow. I actually just went through all of my t-shirts. You went through them? Yeah. Because I have too many...

For how much closet space I have, I've got too many t-shirts. Yeah. Okay. Too many t-shirts actually. I would love to host a little one-man podcast called Too Many T-Shirts. Too Many T-Shirts. Talking T-Shirts. Yeah.

And it's, because I have, t-shirts and caps are basically the variables I have in my fashion sense. Sure. And I have more than I can possibly wear. How many do you think you have? T-shirts before any throwaway? I was over 40. That's a lot. It is a lot.

And you know what? I can't throw them out. Oh, really? So I put them in a bag that I'm calling the archive. Oh, okay. oh really so i put them in a bag that i'm calling the archive and okay my uh my dream is to work towards a um a life maybe a chest of drawers or perhaps a wardrobe that can house yeah all of the t-shirts this is the ultimate dream is all of the t-shirts can be on individual hangers yeah with space to um to go through and appraise oh wow and i'd have them done by color and so one day you know i'm

talking when i'm old okay but there'll be t-shirts from this part of my life that will be on the hang and i think i could wear that today t-shirts for you are like family photos for other people they are a bit benchmarks they represent a moment in time. Yeah. I can understand why you wouldn't want to throw them out. I know you love your t-shirts. You get a t-shirt, you're like, I'm getting that.

And then you get it and you're like, I got it. Yeah. And then you have it. And you're like, this is my t-shirt. Yeah. You're into it. I like t-shirts.

And for those of you out there listening, going, it's a t-shirt, you can throw it away. Would you throw away a child? No. So checkmate, atheist. A photo of a child yeah behold the atheist's nightmare exactly exactly so that's my point um let's let's uh let's level with each other and everyone

it's been a fortnight between screenings It's been Two weeks since you looked at me It's been Fuck I love that It's been You do yours? I can't, I won't and I shan't Here it is It's been

They had it in the latest Two Hearts show And they just did it There's a song where they repeat the lyric it's been And just one of them They put it in and it was so good Do you know can I say I thought, it's been, and then in just one of them, they put it out and it was so good. Do you know, can I say,

I thought your it's was incredible. And I thought your been was a fucking disaster. I'm fine with that. It was crazy. I would rather Icarus,

you know, saw too close and then fuck out rather than be nibbling. So a fortnight between screenings and between you and I

seeing one another. Yeah. We couldn't, you know, due to whatever reasons we have in our personal lives, watch the movie together. And so I'm interested to know about the screening environment, the screening experience, whether you found that little break refreshing or not. I don't want to talk too much about my viewing environment situation. It was messy. That makes it more intriguing. Is that because...

It was the norm. Whatever you think of when you think of the norm with Timbett, it was there. It was like, broke a little piece off for an hour last night. I watched a very brief, like three minutes of it. Three minutes? No, no, no, hold on. On my bike. So I've got a phone holder on my bike. And when I was going to the train station on my bike, it, no. Hold on. On my bike. So I've got a phone holder on my bike.

And when I was going to the train station on my bike, it was playing. Fuck me. Because I didn't know when else I'd be able to watch it in time to get this done. And then you were like, hey, I'm going to be 15 minutes late. And I was like, this is a military operation. Oh, man. I didn't realize how tight things were for you. No, I was still setting stuff up when you got here,

so it's quite fine. And funny. Fine and funny. I just, and this is quite dark, but I just saw in the newspaper a flash of an article about you, either severely maimed or dead. Dead.

I'll tell you how it happened too. I was going too quick and someone opened their door in a car that was parked. That was the bit I was really careful about. There was a main road, like a main artery, that I have to drive down and it's just littered with cars on the side. And I was like, I'm going to get past this bit

and not look at my phone at all. I respect that. Didn't die. It's one of those ones where you read about it and it says podcaster and comedian Tim Batt was found dead on Great North Road while the credits are... And it's just like you read that little bit

where it's like this is what was happening. Even though now they're very respectful in the media they they tend to leave that sort of detail out and i think you think it would come out what did you think what did you this is what i think when i hear that you're watching the movie while you're riding a fucking bike in auckland i think what did you think was going to happen i thought i was going to nail it and then i did if you read the article i appreciate that's what you would think You'd be like you fucking idiot And that would be fair But here's the thing I crushed it

And I watched the whole movie Did you die doing what you loved? How do you feel to know that you died While watching Fast 6 for the fourth time Writing a book Oh that's bad That's a bad feeling Yeah that's no good at all

I've got a young child That's a hell of a thing to do isn't it That's bad No good Who's going to look after this dog Probably Zoe to be fair Yeah almost definitely Zoe Do you have a will

No not yet Need to get on that actually Yeah Yeah need to get a will Because you could be quick You could You know you could write your You could write your podcast rights.

It would be funny to give you, Rufus. Yeah. What's the rule with that? Do I have to say yes? No, I don't think it's a legally binding document. Or like,

oh, I guess it is, but it's not like, I can't force you to have something. But you can be like, you can have this. Or like, it's yours for the taking.

And so now I make a decision. Yeah. Yeah. that feels like how it should work especially with something like an animal you shouldn't have to have to get it no no you should you should be allowed so you take rufus if i left him to you you guys have a tumultuous relationship he barks at you when you enter that's the main part of the tumult. And it does bother me. It would go away instantly. He was phenomenal today. It was two barks and out. But there's another dog here. It's a second dog.

Who then sort of... Mr. President, a second dog has been added to the house. Yeah. And that second dog certainly represented a lot more of the carnage that often comes with Rufus. Okay. You know, I... How about your watch?

Tell me about it. Well, Tim... Any bikes, any dogs? No bikes, no dogs. Lot of t-shirts. Oh, yeah, yeah. Headphones on, laptop up. I was unpacking a suitcase and I...

Thank you for your honesty. And as I did it, I realised there are too many t-shirts here. And so I instigated this archive system that we've already given a a fair airing i would say um and it was i you know i think i think it was not respectful to the movie yeah and i think i i think i i um yeah i think doing a task that i sort of found to be quite rewarding and enjoyable yeah meant that that overshadowed what should have been a screening yeah and i'm still counting it don't

get me wrong oh damn it um well this is yeah i guess it doesn't quite solve the problem we've got but this is why i've got to sort the garage out man i've got to create an environment where it's like this is how the podcast works yeah this is where we watch the fucking movie yeah we watch it together the phones aren't out yeah t-shirts nowhere to be seen i'll be on top okay you're kidding yourself what about if i'm thinking about my t-shirts while i'm watching the movie that i have no control over and thus how can i police it yeah it'd be so funny if you're just thinking about t-shirts for two hours and 11 minutes well I did think about the t-shirts they wear in the show I'll tell you about no slogans no prints yeah there's nothing there isn't it's just colors isn't it yeah and

not even bright colors no it's just a lot of white, really. Black. People look good in white t-shirts, though. You know? I still think about when you wore that ribbed white t-shirt. I think it was a v-neck. Yeah, you need to calm down about that. I can't calm down about that. I still think about that. I've got two of those, which I think I told you at the time.

Yeah. Because they were so cheap. I was like, yeah, I'll get two. How much? They were $5. They were $5, bro. This doesn't make any fucking sense. How do you feel about that now?

Knowing the rant you went on earlier. No, I'm saying I'll buy them. They shouldn't exist. Those ones can exist. Where'd you get them? Down there. What is it called? I can't remember.

I'll look it up afterwards. Farmers? No, man. I don't think I've stepped into a farmer's in years. Not a chain. Except for my children's toys. up afterwards no farmers no man i don't think i've stepped into a farmers in years except by children's toys no no no it was like a tommy gun a tommy gun yeah oh wow it's called tommy gun which i kind of remember from my childhood weirdly and i hadn't seen the store yeah i didn't see one in ages it could be a false memory And then it was like Oh weird And I walked in And I was like

That looks like it'd fit It was five dollars I bought two And some quite nice t-shirts too Yeah they're really nice What sort of undie situation Are you running? Right now

Like what am I wearing right now? Yeah and then Honestly I couldn't tell You can't remember How many pairs of underpants Do you own? Estimate Twelve

All in pretty good nick. Oh, are you on a cycle? No, not necessarily. Were they all bought at the same time? No. A prox? No, no, they're mixed. Would they have been bought across a three-year period?

Yep, I'd say so. Yeah. And the worst? Any holes? Around the band. Around the band? You know? I get them around the gooch. Around the gooch know I get them around the gooch

Around the gooch They thin out around the gooch Yeah They tap in on others But I don't have any Those have been thrown away But right now I actually accidentally

Put my thumb through Made a hole Made a bigger I mean that does speak to the The sort of Yes Not the quality of the fabric At time of purchase,

but certainly... The condition it's currently in. Yeah, yeah. Do you know Chelsea and I run an under system? What is it? Do you have hers on Monday? Yeah. No, both...

I mean, I do most of the laundry, so it's not totally equal, but both of us have the right to throw out... Oh, that's good. There's a pair of underpants that don't meet the standard. You've got right of refusal. I quite like that.

That's good. It's a good system. I think it was observations about my underpants that prompted the system being introduced. I have no doubt. What? Wasn't even a question in my head, guy. She's no saint.

She's not saint, Tim. She's not exactly perfect. Don't go dragging her into this. She's not here to defend herself. She's fucking part of it. Or her underwear. She's part of the problem. As far as you know. So listen, this movie that we saw,

I wrote some stuff down. No, I didn't even do that. I intended to write stuff down And didn't But I can tell you what it was about Oh I'll tell you what I did write down I took a screenshot of the character name And it's The last name is Riley

For that Gina Carano Yeah Person Fuck's going on with her man So Hobbs The character Like rattles off all of her

Credentials Yeah From Police Academy Which is top of the class and all of her credentials from police academy, where she's top of the class and all of that. If you're half as good as you are on paper, we're going to get on just fine. What kind of long game has she been running? Because presumably she, I don't know, went to some prep school or something. She's done well for a long time and sustained it through years

to get to this position to just work with Shaw. Like at what point was she flipped or how long was this in the works? So she's double crossing the family or more specifically Hobbs. She's double crossing from our perspective, but we don't actually know How long she's been Yeah Truly in Shaw's Corner But since before Shaw's Corner

A British corner Full of Salt taffy's not even a British thing Jammy Dodgers Union Jacks And mince pies No that's us

Fuck What do they call a dairy in London? Corner store. Is it a corner store? Corner store, yeah. I think so. I like Servo. Although that's petrol stations, isn't it?

Yeah. But I like Servo. In Australia, it's the brand name. Like it's 7-Eleven. Yeah. Circle K. Circle K. Isn't that the one in Oz?

Never heard of it. No, you have. In Montreal, they call it a dip. Isn't it dip in you? Get off it. It's true. I don't like that. I didn't come up with it.

You've got a fucking problem with it. You can fly to Montreal and tell them. Maybe I fucking will. And the Quebecois will not take kindly to this feedback from some interloping Kiwi. Let them talk. In New York, they call it a bodega. In New Zealand, I think we probably have the least, the most unlikely, the dairy.

Yeah. Yeah, where did it come from? I mean, in Australia, it used to be a milk bar back in the day. I've always liked that. It's cool. Yeah. That's cool. It sounds like somewhere I get a milkshake.

It makes me think of pulling pints of milk and kids drinking them like bears. Do you know what I've been doing recently? I've just watched all of The Boys, the Amazon Prime series starring two New Zealanders, Carl Urban and Anthony Starr. Has he got an E at the end of his surname? Who?

Carl Urban fuck I can't remember which one's the country sing version Keith Urban Urban he's Keith Urban

Carl Urban Urban Urban I just think I mean if he's got no E afterwards I think it's phenomenal for him

somewhere along the way to get like society to call him Urban be fucking hot shit most likely a rare misstep from Timbo

in this show the lead character is a fucking psycho and you know what he loves milk really loves the milk I think that's from

that makes me think of Clockwork Orange yeah yeah those terrifying fellas always down at the milk bar. Those teens. Yeah.

No milk in Furious 6 as far as I know. Breast milk? You've got to assume Mia's expressing something. That's true. Yeah, true. Maybe it's a formula baby.

We don't know. Oh, no. We see her breastfeeding, don't we? No. We don't even see her breasts or the baby eat anything i think we see me in nursing that baby during a picnic that brian is at no no no no no that's uh it's not a picnic that's they're outside they're outside and they're brian's saying it doesn't really feel like home even though it's

home because um i don't actually remember why exactly because what mainly because we were too busy respectively biking and looking at t-shirts no no because vin diesel's busy trying to say ladies alive he's like brian's actually trying to get into something and it's quite an interesting conversation and it gets cut off because brian is emotionally intelligent enough to notice that his friend isn't engaging in the way that he might have thought would be usual he's saying hey it's kind of crazy like i've got this baby we've got this house on paper got everything we want on paper yeah but it doesn't quite feel like home and to me i'm like oh buddy scary feeling you know that's scary the scariest thing in the world is get everything you want and not be fulfilled yeah and uh dom's like oh lady's alive and then you

know and then he kind of you know and it's alluded to in the movie afterwards as well in the seventh film where you know He misses the bullets That's what he misses And he's worried about becoming the family man Does he not say that at all in this one? As well The bullets thing? I don't think so

The babes and the What would you miss more? The fast cars The babes or the bullets? I'd miss the babes dude Bullets can get in the burn That's not something I want in my life No I want babes I want to be surrounded by get in the burn. That's not something I want in my life.

No. I want babes. I want to be surrounded by hotties. I think until someone's shot at you and missed, you probably don't know what it feels like to miss the bullets or to have the bullets miss you. Very nice. Thank you. Yeah, we'll bump those.

But what I wanted to say, and there's an observation I made at the end as well, they start the riff where Dom keeps being like, it's a charger. And Brian's like, it's a skylight. And they're arguing over what the baby likes. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. And also just while we're here, I've got to go, I'm sorry to do this. I've got to flash forward all the way to F9. I think it is when Mia reappears. Yeah.

She's like, Mia, you can't do this. You risk everything. He's like, the kids are in the safest place possible with Brianrian and just how crazy it is i know it's real and just like that season one territory where it's like that's the other thing i was thinking sorry no go the thing i was thinking about last night when i watched the first half of the movie

not on a bike but in my bed was i think you was... I think it's so disrespectful to your bed to watch the movie in it. Yeah, no kidding. No kidding. I could have my wires crossed here, so I'm just going to talk this out loud and see how this goes. The baby that Mia has in this is Jack. Yeah. But little B is a totally other baby.

Yeah. Because that's the one that Vin Diesel has with Elena. Vin Diesel has with Elena that then is going to get brought up by Letty and he. Yeah. So I just kind of find it weird that they introduced a baby, Jack, in this one. And then we never see it. But then they introduce another different little baby in the next ones. Is that so crazy, Tim?

It felt really weird to me last night when I was watching. I was like, yeah, Jack jack should come back jack should be part of this how long do you want this franchise to be alive for a thousand years in which case you know the more children that the characters have name and shunt off screen the more opportunity there is for the franchise to outlive us all do you think got all this fucking AI shit flying around at the moment. It's really chat my ass. Have you used it? I've never used chat GPT, and God willing, I never will.

Neither have I, and I sometimes feel like we're the only people who haven't. Yeah, I know. I agree. And I'm fine with that. I'll fucking do it when I need to, and at some point I will. Are we becoming old?

Yeah, that's fine. Is that what's happening? I think so, yeah. We're setting our ways. We've got our ways of doing things. At some point I will. Are we becoming old? Yeah, that's fine. Is that what's happening? I think so, yeah. We're setting our ways. We've got our ways of doing things. My friend was saying they put the food that they need to use up in their fridge into it and it gives them a recipe. That's good.

It's all sorts of shit. I've had a lot of people using it for funding applications because they're so arduous to write. They say write a funding application for this. Give it a few inputs. Yeah. and then you override it yeah but anyway my question is we're at this point now where people are like part of the writer's strike was sort of tied up with ai and stuff it feels like we're at this interesting period where you'll be able to kind of sign your likeness away and a computer can just generate content based on it don't bring up black mirror assholes i hate it when people bring up black

mirror that's a black mirror thing yeah fuck up can't god damn it what do you think about black mirror it's fine it's a good show you watched it i've been watching the recent ones is any good yeah of course it's good they fucking threw money at it is it is it always good i don't know about that i think i've watched two episodes tell you what charlie brooker doesn't appear to like woman very much based on who consistently dies in these very disparate stories is it woman it's woman yeah it's not the fellas i use the context clue yeah well done mate yeah it is wild though the career he's had you know make all his news wipes and stuff and then this he's got a great youtube video where he deconstructs a news story by a journalist have

you seen that don't think so it's a series of phenomenal like it's really good it's like a it's like a three minute news video it's like the andy daly stand it's really good. It's like a three-minute news video. It's like the Andy Daly stand-up comedy set where he's doing a set which is basically articulating the outline of how you'd structure a stand-up set. Without saying anything at all. With a news story, yeah. I think I have seen that, actually. Yeah. Yeah.

Fuck. He's a smart guy. But anyway, stop bringing up Black Mirror, everyone. I'm aware I'm the one who brought it up you kind of did it to yourself it's because everyone's

fucking so what you were asking there is a question I guess what you're wondering well it's like I think Fast and the Furious is a franchise

that if it came out like five years or if it was going in five years from now it would probably cross that threshold of Hollywood normalizing biffing people's likenesses into a computer yeah years or if it was going in five years from now it would probably cross that threshold of hollywood

normalizing biffing people's likenesses into a computer yeah okay to just continue shit on that we're getting too far off topic with but what does it mean for art well that's it well art gets separated out into human created and artificial intelligence and in the same way that people like to look down their nose at those who enjoy reality TV, say, because they don't think of it as being prestige programming. This dog just scratched me. Yeah, rude. Will people, you know, will some people, will society divide in the way where some people look down their nose at those who enjoy artificial intelligence, created art? It's like, well, you can't actually have a real connection to that because it's not created by humans.

Even though people probably can foster a human connection to the art the same way we can to human created art i don't know man yeah neither it's just annoying i think is my feeling about it all it's annoying yeah i just find the whole thing annoying it's like black mirror people it's like black mirror you're annoying that's annoying it's annoying can we. Can we not? Just fuck up, man. What are we doing in life? Do we all just walk around waiting to hear a snippet of a conversation that we can say, that's something I know about. Is that life?

Is that what life is? I really hope not. No, I think- What's life for you? How do you find depth? Where do you find enjoyment? My honest held belief is that you've got to figure out how to assist the people Who are underneath you In terms of like

Access to resources and shit So figure that out I mean have a good time You've got to have a good time Yeah But that's what you're supposed to do That's what you've got to do Yeah

That's what you're supposed to be doing Not eavesdropping Try and come as a TV reference To a stranger's convo Yeah Because the alternative is you just watch TV all the time the only things you do is watch TV

and listen to yeah and imagine that you spend so much time watching TV you have no friends to actually talk about it with that's the cruel irony of it

all you can do is leech onto other people's conversations you're spending all your time gathering references and now you've got no one to share them with yeah

I tell you Americans love talking yeah more than they like asking questions some of the worst question askers I've met in my life and now you've got no one to share them with. Yeah. I tell you, Americans love talking. Yeah. More than they like asking questions. Some of the worst question askers I've met in my life. But... It's like they're not even familiar with the concept. I think it's a cultural clash

because the expectation is that you just barrel in, right? Yeah. Because our expectation is like, I'll wait for my turn. Someone will ask me a question and then I'll contribute. But i think in america everyone's just scrapping it out i was it was it was crazy because watching you know like taking part in conversations with americans yes where they just talk and then there's a break yeah and you might go to say something or even just input not a question maybe you just want to input like information you have, which is,

and I'm not even talking about like I saw a TV show like that, but like, you know, life experience where you're like this. Yeah. And they just barrel through. Like the silence isn't like a reflection point where it's someone else's turn or they then ask a question at the end. It's like they're just rebooting with their next moment. And so when Americans talk to each other, I'm like,

well, what's the functionality of this? Is it just people taking turns? There's something about it i really like truly there's a there's a there's a confidence to it there's a self-assuredness it's too much it's too much you are basing this i think on specific bits of America, though. I will say that. You're a bi-coastal boy. You go to Oklahoma, you're going to get some questions. You go to Montana, people ask you how you're doing. Yeah. Check into Kansas, you get a smile on the street.

How are you doing? You're not getting that on New York City. Yeah. We went upstate New York, and that's a little bit more heartland. I tell you, it's a little bit more Trumpy. Yeah. A few flags. Yeah, I'll bet there's a few flags. Pretty Trumpy.

Had some car trouble. I tell you, doesn't matter how Trumpy a part of America is, if you're a white heterosexual couple, they'll help you. Well, that's great to hear. You know, in this specific moment of need, need it's fantastic it doesn't need to be the expense of anyone else being helped no that's right and i mean you know maybe they help everyone i don't know do you think dom torito's ever been helped with car trouble in one of these films like as we start to go back he's ever been helped i don't think he could accept help i don't

think you could ask for directions he is your stereotypical alpha male. He doesn't ask for directions. He doesn't ask for help. He doesn't ask anything. He's not a good question asker. Can you imagine Dom Toretto? No. Can you imagine Dom Toretto taking a car into a mechanic's?

No. Fuck, can you imagine? That would be such a good interaction to watch. Yeah. I reckon this is why people like Jeremy Clarkson Hate Teslas Because with modern cars now You actually need specific equipment

To read the microchips on the engines And they're like I don't want another fella Engaged in my intimate relationship Especially someone who is Their relationship to the information Is not like It's built

from a different place they're not even grease monkeys they're fucking nerds yeah and you can't have a nerd knowing more about your car

than you know about your car no that would be emasculating and confusing and remind you of the dinosaur position you occupy in life it is

Jeremy the word emasculating is what springs to mind but every time I walk in I mean and I feel like in so many facets of life every time I walk in, and I feel like this in so many facets of life, every time I go into mechanics, I'm like, they could say anything.

I am so at their mercy. They could say or do anything. You've got to get base knowledge, man. This is the thing. You've just got to get a little slither across the board, a little inch deep, mile wide kind of thing going on. Nah. It's good.

It's good to be able to just go around and know that you won't get completely diddled. I go to the same people. So either they're diddling me the whole time or we are, you know, there's a healthy relationship. Because is the world,

is everyone out to diddle everyone? No, but it's good to know when, is it a world full of diddlers? It's good to know when someone's trying it on a little bit. Yeah. I mean,

yeah. It's how greedy they are, right? Because, you know, within reason, I'll just take anything. If you meet a guy,

if you took your car to the mechanics and literally like, you know, Dom Toretto, but you didn't know who Dom T. If you met a guy, if you took your car to the mechanics and literally like, you know, Dom Toretto, but you didn't know who Dom Toretto was, that guy started working on you. He like came to help you out and deal with your car. What would be running through your head?

Do you know what, do you know how it goes? They start going, so you got this and that and in my head, I just immediately glaze over and I'm like, oh, here we go go they're doing the

bit where they tell me about what's going on with the car again oh i wonder how long this is gonna last and then i'm like just you know can you do the maths at the end and then they say so it's gonna run you about that and i say what is essential do you do you say that yeah what is essential yeah and did they get into some really philosophical yeah they go well things about that you know if you look at x person's hierarchy of needs nah and then at the end if the non-essential bits aren't too extortionate i'll be like well you know it's like this is you know we can do this now save your money down the line I go

alright I don't fucking know man I like that he's southern it just fascinates me that you don't have a baseline desire to like listen a little bit

to gain a little something like you just switch off when the mechanic's like you've blown a head gasket you don't go what the fuck is a head gasket and what does it do no I don't know what a head gasket, you don't go, what the fuck is a head gasket and what does it do?

No. I don't know what a head gasket does either. Because in my warped perception of the world, I'm like, you've chosen, or it has chosen you, but you've spent your life learning about this stuff. You don't have to be able to fix the whole car. I know, but I'm like, you know what? You know this, I don't. That be able to fix the whole car. I know, but I'm like, you know what? Like, you know this.

I don't. That's how it is. Scares the shit out of me how you're going through life. Why is that scary? Because you might electrocute yourself, for one. No. You know? No.

There is an argument for just knowing broadly where some dangers are. I know about where dangers are. Okay. That's good. Where are the dangers? Do you know what I can't do that I really should know how to do and I'm interested to know if you know how to do? Change a tire?

I can change a tire. Yeah. Can you change a tire? Yeah. Yeah. I can do that. I have done that. Brag.

Fucking jumpstart a battery. I haven't had to do that before. I can do that. That's easy. You should teach me how can do that. I have done that. Brag? Fucking jumpstart a battery. I haven't had to do that before. I can do that. That's easy. You should teach me how to do that. Okay. Dad. I'll teach you.

Nice. I got that. What was your shining light from Furious Six? A few moments with The Rock. I mean, I'm going to burn what could be another episode one because i want to talk about this episode so this is my shining light this is a pre uh preamble but like that uh when the rock arrives at the barbecue just before the rock arrives at the barbecue at the very end ludacris and uh roman uh doing the barbecue and roman's giving him like a bit of a

don't just can you just not burn the food again he's like I never burn the food yeah and I really that to me

felt the most like family in this screening of the whole movie where I'm like I really put myself in that and I'm like

this is just this is family this is like my family this is how we talk to each other where it's like it's constant needling and antagonism each other where it's like it's need

constant needling and antagonism for nothing where it's like yeah you're feeding into something which someone is obviously not gonna you know like don't burn the food again yeah you're like i love that as an instruction it's so good don't burn that oh thank you so much exactly yeah it's great that's totally rerouted my intentions for the food so I really enjoyed that and I really it made me want to it made me look forward to or made me want to see more of like just that

that I think you're taking this franchise at it's word that it's about family and you think there's some family dynamics lacking on screen more you know more of the in-between stuff. The stuff that happens in between movies

where they're not saving the world. I'm starting to think this franchise wasn't custom built for you, buddy. They're just getting up each other's ass. I will say, I think the first screening of any movie, it's not not for me. Yeah, yeah, yeah, true. The fourth screening of any movie, it's it's not not for me yeah yeah yeah true the the fourth screening of any

movie it's really probably not for anyone in some ways it's nice that you want more depth from it you've seen something in there and you've gone i actually would like to get i would like to get um but i mean i don't know that we've talked about it, but we've observed it independently and together before, is that just the phenomenal staging of the final conversation between The Rock and Vin Diesel, where they're so visibly not in each other's eyeline. Yes. And it's shot in a way where it's like, at a glance, maybe you'd think that they are,

but it's still, it feels like it's in the world of the movie, they're not even looking at each other. It's an action movie thing i'm trying to i'm trying to articulate how they're standing they're kind of standing like shoulder to shoulder looking past each other it would make sense if they were looking at the horizon yeah but one of them's looking at the wall of a house and the other one's looking to a bar it's kind of like how you would position yourself if you had to whisper a little secret at someone during a party. Yeah.

But that's not what's happening. They just hate each other in real life. They can't show emotion. Yeah, but it's neither of those. It's much. Yeah. Do you know how I watched that little YouTube documentary about Vin Diesel?

I do know that. I got an appreciation for him. I did the same thing with The Rock recently and I had to cut it off at the bit where they started talking about The Fast and Furious so I didn't get information I haven't seen yet. Oh, wow. Fascinating stuff.

Until then though? Super interesting. Do you respect him more? I do, actually. If you find out about anyone's origin story, usually you're one that respects him more. Hugely successful people have usually taken a few knocks and he certainly did.

He was a kid on the wrong side of the tracks. He got arrested a bunch and he had all his chips on football so he's gonna be a football star didn't happen for him got an injury fucked out resisted wrestling comes from a wrestling family and then eventually was like this is the only way i'm gonna make anything of myself yeah got in and managed to like ride the wwe at the height of its he became the biggest star he actually didn't have that long of a career it was about six or seven years but he was the biggest star during their most popular period and then he managed to parlay that into the movies happy for him well he was my shining light as well

uh it's the standoff it's after the street race between letty and dom and letty goes away and then dom's talking to shore and he sure reveals that he's got a gun trained on him and he goes i can't remember what dom says that makes two of us whatever and then he goes i guess that's where the story yeah that's where the story ends let me guess let me guess uh hobs yeah and then you just get a cutaway of hobbs you go come on you i don't know if you just do something i think the line is like come on you some bitch yeah do something and it's just like and it also the annoying bit about that is it interrupts an exchange because...

So Shaw makes a reference about Hobbes being a two-bit government hack and how it is astounding to him that Dom Toretto, this international criminal, a guy who started stealing DVD players in East LA and rose to the ranks of pulling off a $100 million heist in Brazil, is now working with a two-bit government hack like Hobbes. And so then they've got this neat little bit of dialogue. And he goes, I guess this is where the story ends. Shaw says that.

And then the spot of the sniper rifle appears on Dom. And then Dom says, if that's the way it's got to be. And then a sniper rifle dot appears on shore. It's a fucking stalemate. It's a Mexican standoff. And so then what happens for those two would be

fuck, what is the next line? In the movie it's after you cut away to Hobbs and come back. Yeah, and he says I think Toretto just repeats it. Two bit government hack

Which would make Way more sense If you stayed In the shot with them Yeah But they interrupt it For the dumb Some bitches side

I know Which to me I watched it this time And I was like Fucking Dwayne Johnson Got in the editing bay And made them put

That in there It's why I like it It's like He has a In his contract A certain number of some bitches he has to get into the film and it is so superb.

He answers to no one. I love it. Fucking hell. I loved it. That's my shining light. What's yours? Good shining light, man. Thank you.

There's detail. The fact that the movie puts such a significant narrative event for the franchise in the after the credits scene. Normally after the credits you get a little review.

It's like, hey, guess what? Thanos exists or some shit. This is like Jason Statham's here and he's killed a beloved character. It's like, what the? I might have left. A lot of people left the cinema. We didn't see it until the third watch.

We caught it on the second because I paused it to read. Yeah. I paused it to read the encouragement of people left the cinema. We did. We didn't see it until like the third watch. We caught it on the second because I paused it to read, yeah. I paused it to read the encouragement of people to stay safe. It was bold and it was my shining light. It was a bold decision to make. Yeah, I respect that. Super bold.

I think we should go away. We should regroup. We should have it. The next screening should be fucking like cheek to cheek. Old school. Yeah.

Cheek to cheek. Like seriously getting in because we've only seen this movie two more times. Yep, yep, yep. I quite agree. fucking like cheek to cheek old school cheek to cheek like seriously getting in because we've only seen this movie two more times yep yep yep I quite agree and the other thing

I'd like to say is this you know it's not just the fast we are we're going to be plumbing the depths of either end of the

American pop cultural offerings simultaneous yes because it's not just these fast cars that are happening right now. Also, in the present day, they are rolling out the new season event just like that.

And you and I are going to fucking get in there and we're going to watch the ever-loving shit out of it. And can I say, I am actually sincerely, unironically so excited. Yeah, I'm pretty hyped. I think it's gonna be hot shit so let's leave on a high look forward to that

if you wanna watch it first and watch it via video you better help us out on Substack twioat.substack.com it's just 5 US dollars a month that's less than the cost

of a t-shirt currently yeah imagine that yeah we put stuff on there you got anything you wanna say? oh it's nice to see you, Tim.

It's nice to see you, man. And everyone who came out to a show in New York, it was nice to see you too. 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1