The Worst Idea Of All Time - 43: Bored Game

Episode Date: May 20, 2019

Auckland Libertarians: Show this SundayA 21.5hr phone call, a half-finished poem and a whole lot of sickness. The boiz are not having fun. Guyguy is sick as a dog, Timbo is frustrated with the film and his podcast partner. Some big questions get asked of Mattress Pikelet King, an attempt is made at deciphering the gals’ star signs and there’s plans for Sex and The City: The TV Series: The Movie: The Board Game. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

today you ready okay let's go the hunt for the wildest movie of the summer everybody ends here this is your super friendly and not aggressive reminder to buy tickets immediately borderlands now playing we just have a good rhythm together you know know, he sort of feels me out, I feel him out, and we go for it. Hello, and welcome along to an episode of the worst idea of all time. I'm with Tim. Oh no, it finally happened Guy Montgomery has been defeated

by the podcast in this the 40-30 episode of the fuck what season are we doing? 4 yeah man look I gotta tell you I'm sick this house I'm in

yes everyone's being struck down by the flu sick. I'm sick. This house I'm in. Yes. Everyone's being struck down by the flu. Oh, you're actually sick. And you haven't really watched Sex and the City until you're alternating fevers with your partner in bed

while the protagonists just prattle on about the non-issues that are plaguing their lives. Oh, Monty. You know, wafting in and out of a fever dream. It feels like my throat's closing over. Fuck, man.

No good. It was brutal. I will say this, though, before we get into it. Earlier today, I watched, well, earlier today today actually, do you know what I did? This is quite unlike me, but I listened to an episode of a podcast. Of any podcast is very outside of character for you. Yes. I listened to an episode of a podcast called Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend. Great show. In which he was catching up with his friend, Lisa Kudrow. Best known for playing Phoebe Buffay on Friends.

And so in addition to all of these frustrations, there is a cat called Fig, who i think is pretty funny but uh is also like one of a really eccentric cat uh and he's climbing over he's sort of wearing himself like a scarf around my neck anyway um she was talking about oh they were talking about a show she was in called The Comeback have you heard about this show Tim? The Comeback no it's about, it's her playing

a character I think named Valerie someone and she, there were two seasons one in 2005 and one in 2015 or 14 and in it she plays this sort of former hot property as a performer who uh gets a reality show to sort of help launch relaunch her career after she's been out of work and out of the public eye for a while it was quite groundbreaking and i watched the first

episode um with chelsea and it was really really good and really quite interesting and it turns out that lisa kudrow was the co-creator executive producer and screenwriter of this show and with whom should she have worked on it but the mattress himself oh mattress pikelet oh and it was so interesting to see, like, genuinely a really sort of quite experimental and adventurous and really well-executed concept. And this was just the pilot, mind you, which is a, you know, it's a challenge for any episode to really nail their pilot. Yeah. And so the sort of the hard gear change from that to Sex and the City made for quite a fascinating sort of thing. I was like, I feel like a lot is a lot of creative license and freedom afforded to him in this project alongside Lisa Kudrow.

And they really took full advantage of it. And to think that a few years later he was fucking in his room just banging on a keyboard until this came out. I guess Sex and the City was groundbreaking at this time as well, but I found it difficult to reconcile that the same person could be responsible for two wildly different ideas and wildly different outcomes of execution on ideas. Well, what a journey you went on today. Did you watch the pilot blind to the fact that Mattress Parklet was involved and then found that out only after watching it?

I can't remember. It was sort of enduring it, I think. It was certainly... It wasn't the reason you watched it, is what I'm asking. No, no, no. It was not, no. What a bit of serendipity, eh?

Yeah. The universe brought it to you. People make good and bad things, don't they? Yes, they do, Guy. It happens all the time. Sure. You and I make good and bad things. don't they? Yes, they do, Guy. It happens all the time. Sure. You and I make good and bad things. Yeah, it's true, actually.

That's a great example. Yeah, man, but sort of, I guess that's where I'm at. So I watched it. I didn't like it. What's going on with you, buddy? You're in our nation's cultural capital, and in many ways, our nation's capital, Wellington. Yeah, it's the actual capital city.

So had I stayed at home, I might be in the same situation you're in because my wife has fallen ill with the virus. And so imagine that if both of us were just crook, separately sweating through a watch. But instead, my physical health was well, and my mental health was challenged, and my emotional strength was broken. And the thing I keep coming back to this watch, and I just couldn't escape it, is that I was sober watching it. And that is to say, not physical sobriety. That wasn't the important factor because I'm physically sober most of the time when I watch it.

But I felt so... I couldn't produce any good feeling chemicals in my brain. I couldn't rally. At one point, I decided that I felt so miserable that it would be a good opportunity for me to pour some of that out into poetry. So I started, I thought I was going to start writing a whole stack of poems that I'd have ready for you

for the episode. I couldn't even get past about four stack of poems that I'd have ready for you for the episode I couldn't even get past about four lines and then I just gave up read it to me alright I'll boot up I turned it off you see so I'll boot it back up it's really nothing because I only just got started and then I

abandoned the whole the whole enterprise I would like to go into bat for whoever was in charge of continuity when Mr. Big was catching the tomatoes. Every week, I try to catch this guy out. And every week, he shows up with the goods. Well, no, it's not really because I thought I caught him. I went back and watched it three times over.

I found a beer in my parents' house and I'm drinking it now. But what I thought was a continuity error actually turned out to be a continuity triumph. So as he slides a chopped tomato into the bowl in which he's preparing some sort of salad, I presume, we then see him in a different frame sort of reveal a tomato. And to me, I thought, well, hold on a second. This guy's pulling tomatoes out of thin air.

If you slow it down, you'll see there's a colander next to the bowl in which he's putting the chopped tomatoes. So not only is he doing a good job on chopping the tomatoes, but he's presumably cleaned them. And that's where a lot of people get food poisoning because they don't wash their fruit and vegetables. But it's really important you do because they can carry all sorts of unknown bacteria,

you know, on the way from the farmer's place to the market or even from the market to your home. And he reveals it. And I thought, well, where's this tomato come from? Thin air? Better luck next time mr big but as it turns out you do see not only do you see him reaching into the colander you can see the shade of red on the tomato through some of the holes in the colander i mean it is a triumph for

continuity and um yeah fucking well done of movie making i mean i'm not going to stop hunting you know you're not going to throw me i just wish. I just wish that you would focus on a different set. It's like now we're at the point where we've seen the movie 43 times and you're actually looking at the same scene with eagle eyes to see if there's a difference from last time. You're looking at the same shot. You're looking at the exact same frames. Do you know that's what makes it that much more impressive?

What are you talking about? Well that not only is the scene... What are you talking about? Well, not only is it not getting worse, but somehow the continuity is getting better. I don't want to get mad at you because I know you're sick,

but you're fucked in the head, mate. Absolutely not. You've cooked it. You are beyond... You know, the fact that you're not impressed by this tells me that you're not in a good place.

Because this is really impressive. It isn't. Because we've talked about it. We've been through it. We've discussed it. Not that particular bit. The colander. Not the colander.

Not the fact you see the tomato through one of the little holes in the colander. Not the fact that Big washes his tomatoes. Fuck it, Jack. Doesn't it just seem so futile though, Guy? Doesn't it just seem so fucking pointless to talk about the colander not the fact that big washes his tomatoes doesn't it just seem so futile though guy doesn't it just seem so fucking pointless to talk about the colander i haven't talked about any of that by the way if you're listening along in auckland you could see this kind of conversation live this sunday i was going to say 26 at whammy Bar, 3pm. Tickets are cheap.

The vibe is good. Yeah. We will be airing a piece of media that Guy and I made, which we're not allowed to release online as well, only to a live audience. I'll say this, though. Yeah? You want to talk about things getting better and worse?

Samantha Jones' Botox gag when Carrie calls to tell her that she is engaged has not aged well. Oh, you don't like that now. I don't know that I ever did like it, but it's really driving me up the fucking wall. That's crazy. You came into that comment like you were going to present something you enjoyed, you did you were just like hey here's a surprise i still hate this bit some things get better some things get worse okay here's the poem um everyone exists in a world of their own i want these women struck with a predator drone. Carrie's biffing phones into the ocean.

Smith's biffing 45K into it, and then I stopped. That's all I am. What was he biffing it into? He spent 55K on that ring. Yeah, but Samantha would have got it for 10, so I figured you do the math. The wastage is 45.

Yeah, she probably would have got it for 10. No one would buy that ring. It's a fuck-ugly ring. It looks like a kind of ring that you would win out of a parlor game in one of those balls, and there's a parrot protecting it. Do you know what I'm talking about? Not entirely. Say it again. It's like in Big, you know that the fortune teller?

I've not seen it. Zoltan, I think his name is. Zoltar. Zoltar, Zoltan. And he produces the little cards and writes the wishes that make Tom Hanks big. Sort of of that era of game. I remember as a child in christchurch there was one in merivale mall i think and there was a a crude animatronic parrot sitting atop a treasure trove

of plastic balls with treasures contained within and you inserted a gold coin, presumably a New Zealand one, and in exchange you would receive an unknown goodie. And those kind of rings are just the kind of thing that you would get, some cheap trinket, some gaudy bit of jewellery for the kids. Well, look, man. That's what the ring looks like to me. Yeah, it does. It looks like it's not like 55 000 and the fact that she's upset that her thoughtful partner knew she wanted it went to trouble of buying for and giving it to her on her anniversary is a problem in her life

yes there's a lot more about samantha than it does about our friend smith jared with the j can i tell you something funny, though? Yeah. You're winding up to something good. I do have something to say, but I'll wait. Now I feel incredibly disrespectful. I've interrupted you. No, you haven't.

I may actually have brought this up before, but I do it every time now. You know right at the start where she says, every year 20-something women come to New York City? And I like to think that instead of her meaning 20-something women as in the age 20-something, there's somewhere between 20 and 30 women that come to New York City annually, and that's it. Then they shut the gate, and those 20-something women must battle it out for their position in the big apple

i love battle royale style you know that kind of syncs up neatly with my idea that carrie is sort of remembering how to operate in this world early in the film because not long after she's saying that she says i figured out labels early so I turned my attention to looking for love. And she walks past two people on the street who seem to be whispering sweet nothings. But it turns out he's actually telling this woman that he's been canoodling with that he's married. And she says, you're married? You're fucking married? And Carrie, for that moment, forgets entirely how to walk. She has no idea how to move past this argument.

And if you watch it closely, you'll see her experimenting with ways to lead, to move her body. And that paired with the fact that, you know, she thinks that only about 24, 25 women arrive in New York annually, tells me that Mattress Pikelet probably was just like get something on the page and keep going and we'll

come back and fix the start later Do you think in the imaginings of Mattress Pikelet there's been maybe a blunt force trauma, some sort of head injury, a contusion which has befallen our protagonist

in between the events of the last episode of Sex and the City, the TV show, and what we're watching, Sex and the City, the movie. And that's also what leads her to create this persona of St. Louis from St. Louis. Hey, look, man, you know it's not my place to speculate, but I 100% know for a fact that Mattress Pike had experienced some blunt force trauma.

Oh, you think he did? was suggesting he thought carrie did but i think i think you're right i think it's semi-autobiographical because i think mattress parklet king expresses his worldview through carrie so he got hit by a car accidentally and it you know it was one of those things where it wasn't such a big deal but it had some lasting impacts that he wasn't quite aware of. He got checked out at the hospital. They gave him the all-clear. He never felt quite the same again, but he figured that, you know, he just sort of had a bit of whiplash or a similar sort of injury that after a few days would come right.

Unfortunately, it didn't. He burst a blood vessel in his brain. He had a mini-stroke. And as a result, he just crapped out a 300-page script, uninhibited by the normal parts of your brain that would sort of be selective and editorializing what should stay and what should go in the script. It was gone.

And what he's done is he's transplanted his trauma onto the page as well via Carrie and Louise. And in doing that he's actually buried the evidence that this is what's happened because there's a i mean we've discovered that carrie creates uh jennifer hudson's character saint louise inside of this film so that's you know that's an example of someone creating a character to support themselves through whatever. But I got sent by Ayo Adebri, a friend of the podcast,

an article about a popular fan theory that also is supported by Sergiska Parker and that she thinks that all of carrie bradshaw's friends were just in her head sjp supports this yeah i hadn't heard this uh well so i was in an interview on a podcast for the nerdist she revealed that she always suspected that the three non-carry bradshaw's sex in the city a podcast for the Nerdist. She revealed that she always suspected that the three non-Carrie Bradshaw's Sex and the City characters were just figures of her imagination

who were created to support her column. As if you couldn't stick it to Kim Cattrall anymore, you then make the revelation that she's the only real person in the show. So the characters represented different sort of archetypes of woman and she used herself and the characters to anchor her stories um which would be representative of what you've said my mattress pikelet's doing yeah so it's like a clue he's he's fed us um The only thing is, while I sort of appreciate the creative storytelling there,

it sort of does suggest that the character has a long-running psychotic break as well, you know, for this to hold water. Well, this is entirely unrelated to anything we've been talking about, but what if I told you I did find a continuity error today, Tim? How would that make you feel? I'm so happy. Because it's new information, and any stimulus that is novel

is ever so welcome on this podcast. I just need new bits of data. So throw it at me, big boy. Mr. Big leaves the rehearsal dinner at which he was wearing a black suit with a white shirt and a tie. Oh, my God. Another piece of new information.

At the rehearsal dinner, you know the partner at the firm? That asshole guy? Carl. His name's Carl. Why do you always forget his name? You've got a good memory. You always seem to forget Carl for some reason. We both forget all sorts of details all the time.

Guess who plays Lisa Kudrow's husband in the show the comeback get fucked get fucked absolutely old school mattress pie click collaborator no doubt about it it's incredible he's a type uh sorry he's a businessman uh but he's not such an asshole he's actually seems through one episode to be a largely supportive partner um that's by the by just nice to see you know it's always interesting to see who collaborates with who in this crazy world and this crazy business big comes home from the rehearsal dinner we see him on the phone later to carry bradshaw right he's in a chocolate brown shirt he has come home late at night and changed out of a suit into casual wear which is still a shirt is this not crazy to you that's a surprisingly

big fuck up do you like that's not even that's not even oh oh okay sorry okay that to me is a you know you know how i feel about these things you can justify that that could be a character decision mr big only wears shirts so that's fine i think it's fucking insane to come home after a night somewhat on the piss, emotionally challenged, and not get into your comfy clothes and dig into bed, but to put on your chocolate shirt and try and write your wedding vows with a couple of fingers of whiskey.

But through the cuff of his shirt, we see his watch poking out. It tells us that the time is, and all of this is while he's on the phone to Carrie Bradshaw, by the way, because it's the only time he's introduced in that scene, because we're actually focusing on Carrie and the gals. He's wearing a watch that says it's 2.15am. Wow.

That's crazy, because Lily is still up. All of the gals are up. This is good stuff, Detective are up it's the day before the detective guy it's the day before the wedding what are you doing up at 2 15 a.m how is lily up then no wonder she's hiding cell phones and stuff she's acting out she's exhausted of course some shut-eye. Kids love boundaries. And then, and the next time we see him in frame, his watch reads, get this, 11.45, presumably PM, but still, this phone call lasts for no longer than one minute.

Yet, as represented by Mr. Big's's watch this phone call goes for nine two hours wait which one comes first i thought you said it was 215 first it is and then it goes to 11 something yeah so it actually doesn't that make the phone call about 21 and a half hours or something 22 hours well I mean yeah there are two ways to read that one is that the phone call lasts for 21 hours or two

yeah that there's just a continuity error that the same person who worked on tomatoes got fired for complaining about something. Well, Guy, of course. Dear listener, let me draw your attention to the fact that maybe the premise of the joke didn't happen. You're dead right, Guy.

Maybe it is simply a continuity error. A big dumb watch fuck-up. I mean, it could go either way. But to me, what I'd like to say is this. Continuity person and Mr. Big, you better watch out. Because you've been licked. The Frosty Boys came for you, they found you and they licked you. Now you're fucked.

Big time. You've got to. It would have to be said. It would have to be noted that at this point in the 40s, for us to get any joy out of that level of fuck up, that level of detail that's marginally off. I mean, to echo sentiments which I chastised you for voicing in the first place in this episode, they did fucking well on continuity, didn't they?

Mate, you're telling me. I always say this as well. So, is Mr. Pig all good? In what way? Sure, he jilts her he's tired he's pissed but when he's driving away from the wedding he says oh my god what the fuck am i doing he turns the car around the car turns around the bridal party's car is driving down the road past them he puts the window down he says carrie she opens the door runs towards him he says i know i fucked up but i'm ready

i'm ready to get married now he still wants to get married this is an interesting thing guy because if you compare him with steve so the length of Steve's mistake, if we take it at minimum, is the amount of time it took Steve to have sex with someone. I mean, it's quite hard to determine how long that actually was. And I guess you would count some of the courtship ritual, some of the latter bit of that in in the in there as well the sort of um the tail end of the flirting as it's getting you know leading to somewhere the the length of time of the mistake is uh for big like what like a couple of minutes ultimately like he's got reservations but he gets his suit on and he gets in his car

and he goes you know all I'm saying I understand it's embarrassing to show back up but they're less than a block from the venue all the guests are there all the trimmings are there he wants to do it you know

it's a conversation for later definitely but you can still go through with the wedding yeah dead right we accept that we know that and that is true but he doesn't but the length of his fuck up really is only about two to three minutes, isn't it? It's him being at the church and not going in, or sorry, the library, and not going in, and then getting in his car and driving away, which he almost immediately regrets and tries to rectify. You know what I'm saying?

Yeah. We build an entire movie, movie really off the back of that three minute mistake but the movies also build on the backbone of the franchise which is mr biggs you know and carrie's will they or won't they his is flitting back and forth between committing to her or not so i understand there's history there. To die-hard fans of the show who are also listening to the podcast, of which I imagine there are countless, or one,

staunch Sex and the City viewing libertarian listener, I understand that, but I still think on a different day, we might get a different result. I would almost wager a fresh 50 note then one of the screenings we have coming up soon you've got to stop carrie's gonna say okay you're right let's go back let's go back and finish this wedding shocking to me that you have

you are still sort of around in the world just surviving you know i'll put that wager on with you right now if you so choose, Tim. No, absolutely not. I've denied it in the past and I'll deny it today. No, there is one $50 bet between us. What's that one? Oh, it's this one, isn't it? Well, no, it's different.

You kind of forced me. What is that one? That he's going to get married one day. He won't jilt her. Yeah. This one is that he will jilt her and they'll still get married. Far out, dude. You're stacking some wild money on this craps table.

That's for sure. Take it or leave it. Absolutely leaving it. Last chance to loan. I'm leaving it. Five. I'm not doing it to you. Three. Yeah. Last chance. absolutely saloon i'm leaving it five four three yeah last chance yeah no we're fine we're good two we're good one okay here's the question i wanted to ask you before actually i've got two questions

and both of them are going to involve i reckon you would have been the favourite to win that bet. The first question is, go through the four gals and New York City, the fifth gal, and St. Louise, the sixth imagined gal, and please tell me what star signs each of them are. Go. Pisces, Sagittarius, Capricorn, Libra, Aries. You do the math. Oh, man. Okay. My second question is, my name is Tim Milton Bradley. I like that.

I've called you a sick ass into my office. Yeah, man. Is there any other time we could do this? I like that. I've called you a sick ass into my office. Yeah, man. Because you... Is there any other time we could do this? Can I get you a tissue? Please. Today. You ready?

Okay, let's go. The hunt for the wildest movie of the summer. Everybody run! Ends here. This is your super friendly and not aggressive reminder to buy tickets immediately borderlands now playing as you know i'm a busy man but as you also know you've been knocking down my door to book this meeting because you have come up with an ingenious idea to make the sex in the city the movie the board game and i would like for you to

tell me how does it work exactly what is the point how does one play it how does it function what is it similar to perhaps some touchstones how many players can the game facilitate it's set up like a monopoly board the pieces are represented by different items that we identify with the characters in the film. A stiletto, a cosmopolitan glass, a key ring, a handbag, you know, a piece of casual racism. And around the board, we have different sort of hallmark events not as in the characters lives in the movies but also in the characters lives we have uh first successful one night stand and so as you go around the board you collect all of these experiences and uh your hope is that you'll land on you know they're represented by different colors

and the colors represent different characters or ambitions the characters have. So dark blue represents relationship stuff. So you might have your first successful one-night stand on a dark blue and then say you roll anywhere from a six from there. If you get another dark blue, you will run into the person with whom you had that one-night stand at a public event, and you'll talk to them. And, you know, if you roll another six from there,

you will be asked on a date. And then some of the other colors, like the light blue, that's career-driven stuff. So you might get an article published in Vogue as a freelance writer. And then from there, all of a sudden, you might be offered a casual contract writing a monthly column for Vogue. And in essence, as you go around the board, you sort of collect all these experiences. And you might wind up, much like in life, you might only get several sort of surface level experiences of success so you might have a one-night stand you might publish one article but nothing may come

of these experiences you might just continue to flit around an entry-level sort of position in terms of life success against what you aspire for you might want to be married you might want to be a published author who puts out books but you're just flapping around you know one night stands and blogs uh but the longer you play for the more likely you are to to find a life that that you want does this make much sense a little yeah i'm not quite following the mechanic but i am following very much the vibe and i'm luckily for you a vibe guy yeah so ask me about the mechanic how does the mechanic quite operate like how does one win uh to win you have to be the last person playing the game.

Then how do you get kicked out of the game? Oh, people will get sick of it. Oh, it's just people leaving? Yeah. That's it? There's no other way. Okay. So to win, you have to be the most strong-willed. Much like anyone who moves to New York, to truly succeed, you have to be the most strong-willed. Much like anyone who moves to New York, to truly succeed,

you have to have the iron will of someone who is willing to degrade and subject themselves to the unrelenting grind and misery of life in the big city or on the big board longer than anyone else. And once they go, you can hoover up all their opportunities. You can hoover up previous successes, relationships, work experience, and claim it as your own. This is no way to play a board game. This is fucked.

So you sit down with how many mates, how many people can play the game at once? Anywhere between two and 50. Okay, two to 50 people sit down at a table, bust out Sex and the City, the movie, the board game. Sorry, that's the age approved ages.

How many, what number of players can it facilitate? Anywhere between 2 and 50. We've got between 2 and 50, 52 to 50 year olds sitting at a table enjoying their favourite television show turned movie

turned game and the only way to win is to just not leave like a hand on a car for a radio show promotion almost exactly that's sort of what, that was the thing that sort of spun the idea off.

I mean, I'll pay for it. We'll make it. Yeah. Great. Here's hoping consumers will pay for it too. They're idiots. They'll pay for anything that we slap a big Sex and the City logo on. They're not paying attention anymore.

And so it is. The colder water. What's going on with you, man? Dormant's come over. Do you think... I just sang you My Shining Light. I just sang you My Shining Light I just sang you my shining light. It was the doorman's comb-over.

I really fucked it. It was comb-over. That's good. And Carrie's building. The building they want to live in? Yeah. They do live in that. He's got a fucking...

I guess they do, yeah. You know, when they first walk in and there's a woman who walks out with what looks like maybe a schnauzer, some sort of small dog. And there's a the bellboy or the the doorman there his comb over is a fucking abomination it's a sensation it's one of the most funny eh because they're very like accepted a lot of people have them but it is

uh a ruse that no one sort of accepts, but also no one will call out. It's just we all agree to not talk about it. Who are they for? The average punter. They're for everyone. Men, women, and children. They're for all of us. The comb-over is for the common it individual um what what's going on with you man

here's my theory i think you got sick because you all you are you've been doing comedy shows all in a row now that they're finished your body's gone sweet time for me to fuck out uh that might be what happened i never thought about, but there's a high chance that's what happened. You push and you push and you push. Then when you stop pushing one day, your body goes, Sweet as, I was harboring a whole bunch of bacteria. And it's time for them to win a battle. That's what it feels like.

And I've got to tell you, man, that screening did no one any favors. Did I ever tell you about the play i wrote no when i was at the sickest that i can remember but i've been really sick only a small handful of times in my life once i got scarlet fever as a kid and i've subsequently been told that this fact is wrong and i've remembered it incorrectly but i have a memory of being told by the doctor at the time that only 10 of the population can even get scarlet fever and my man with it with the obscure sickness to 90 of the general populace you've been licked final year in high school i was bored out of my goddamn mind. And so I decided to write a play to keep myself amused. And it was called The New Adventures of Hercules in Johnsonville. And the story centered around Zeus, the Greek king of the gods,

seeing Lord of the Rings, which was very popular at the time, had just come out. It was really putting Wellington and New Zealand at large on the global map. Zeus had seen it from atop his Mount Olympus home and fallen in love with the landscape, so he decided to relocate himself,a and hercules to wellington but they accidentally got a place in johnsonville which is very suburban and the play followed uh zeus becoming a taxi driver underappreciated and sort of experiencing um the xenophobia and racism that often accompanies the immigrant experience

and Hercules having to move to a new high school, real fish out of water, getting punked by the kids. Of course. And falling in love with a girl called Twizel. And Hera, who was a stay-at-home woman of leisure, racking up huge bills and just getting mad at everyone because she missed her home in Greece. This is a pretty good play.

Did you perform it or just write it? No, we put it on. I directed it. That's where i got real sick because i wrote it and then i was like well we're gonna put this sucker on and then um we you know rehearsed it and and put it on and uh of course this was all sort of alongside the school work and the exams and things and so i was really given it what for and as soon as the uh the the run of the play had ended um i proceeded to get incredibly ill and I think

it's because of that thing where you just keep your shit holding on for a short while and then your body just collapses after it's done my man do I know that feeling bed ridden for a couple of days how tall do you think Sergius Kapaka

is? 5 foot and 9 inches. 5 foot 3. 5 3 did you say? Yeah. Wow. That's tiny.

160 centimeters. Holy. That is miniature. Oh good on her. That's awesome. How tall is Matthew Broderick? Do you want to punch that in? That'll be revealed on our next episode.

I'm going to guess it's 5'11". That's my punt. Am I meant to be looking it up? The choice is firmly in your hands, but I actually would love to know. I need to know. What'd you say? 5'11". 5'7".

All of Hollywood is so short. I'm taller than Matthew Broderick. That's awesome. Yeah, fuck him up, dude. Don't forget, though. Do not forget what he's capable of. Don't. Do not.

Don't. On social media today, I floated a theory that you, Guy Montgomery, in fact, are three children stacked on each other's shoulders inside a coat, and I stand behind it. That's untrue.rue no it's not and i'm gonna kids don't know how to get sick like this i will prove it kids know nothing but how to get sick like you're sick right now not like this thing they're best at and uh the thing is i'm gonna prove it um to a live audience in Auckland. This coming Sunday at Whammy Bar, if you go to the Worst Idea Facebook page,

facebook.com slash worstideaofalltime, we've got an event page there and you can grab tickets. Get them while they're hot. Guy and I will perform a live episode of the podcast in front of you, our beautiful libertarian listener, and we will also be airing that unreleased media. Oh, yeah. It's pornography.

That's exciting. It is exciting. Otherwise, please look after yourselves. I'm going to go to bed. I've really got to get healthy. I hate this. I hate being feverish. See everybody you didn't do a shine light guy wrap a wrap a hot towel around your head you didn't do a shine long take a long shower wrap a hot towel around your head you didn't do a shine light

my shining light today for this episode is... It's fucking Harry's big, bald, beautiful head. So many lights shining off of it. It's the way it glistens when he's making love to Charlotte. It's good. You know that when a man becomes bald, his scrotum becomes as smooth as his head. It's not true.

Nothing you say is true. You go get some water and some bed rest, my friend. Hey, Tim. Yeah. Fuck you. I love you. Yeah. Okay, buddy.

I'll talk to you later. Bye, everyone. Sight back. you yeah okay buddy i'll talk to you later bye everyone so back we just have a good rhythm together you know he sort of feels me out i feel him out and uh we go for it today you ready okay let's go the hunt for the wildest movie of the summer ends here this is your super friendly and not aggressive reminder to buy tickets immediately borderlands now playing