The Worst Idea Of All Time - 53: End (w Paul F. Tompkins, Live in LA)

Episode Date: July 5, 2019

This is the last episode of the ill-conceived fourth season, perhaps of The Worst Idea of All Time itself. Special guest Paul F. Tompkins joins the fellaz in front of a live Los Angeles audience to reaffirm his instruction that Guy and Tim never do any more of this project. The trio wax philosophical on the nature of suffering for art and enjoyment, in intimacy of men’s feet touching and of course, what it means to colour outside the lines. Who’s to say what’s next for the fellaz. One thing is for sure, it’s been a terrible, terrible ride. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to the worst idea of all time, live in Los Angeles, California. Don't worry. The curtain was a classy touch. I've got to say, never walked out from behind a curtain before. Welcome to the worst idea of all time. Live in Los Angeles, California, featuring Paul F. Tompkins, ladies and gentlemen. Incredible. It's so good to be here, Paul. How are you feeling? I feel weird being out here so soon. I feel like this is your private time and I'm intruding on it.

Have you felt like that the entire afternoon? No. Guy, come on. The boys came over to my home today and we watched the movie together as a family. Here's the address. That's true. And then they left. And now here we are again, 45 minutes later.

The timing was almost perfect. It was almost perfect. Can I just say, what an honor it is to be in Los Angeles, California. I don't know if you're aware, but I've had to traipse my way across this godforsaken country to make it here. New York City is a renowned shithole. Chicago, Illinois might as well not be on the map as far as I'm concerned. And Portland, Oregon was downloaded from some tasteless

Pinterest board. It is a relief to be in the greatest city on God's green earth. Los Angeles, California. Aren't you glad that you don't have to keep adding cities? That tonight is the end of that bit

i don't know what you're talking about paul i don't either those were earnest feelings communicated efficiently and accurately uh so the good news is we don't have to watch sex in the city city anymore. And that feels really good, Tim. How do you feel about that, though? I just said it feels really good. What did you think he was holding back? I don't know. This is what I do. I interrogate a little bit.

I poke and I prod. I have a look inside my boy Monty's heart and his mind. I figure out what's going on. Okay. Well, how do you think I feel about it? I don't know. Maybe I'm projecting a little bit. When we were watching at your house,

I was like, I should be feeling better than this. You know? Last watch, end of an era, end of a nightmare, to be honest. But I felt strangely empty. Oh, no. Yeah. I had a lovely time

at your house. Thank you so much for welcoming us in with open arms. This is very conflicting for me because what Tim is describing is the way I feel at home.

Uh-oh. But I'm glad that you had a good time. Yeah, no, it was a lovely home. One of the more enjoyable screenings I've had this entire season.

Paul's lovely wife, Janie, was also there. She's here tonight, folks. Give her a hand. Yeah, give her a hand. No, not applause. If you see her, help out. Help her out. She has fallen on hard times, and I practice tough love.

It was so nice to be watching with two people who had seen the movie before, but through, relatively speaking, fresh eyes. Yeah, I thought it was, I mean, it was just, it was a great way to say goodbye. I feel no sense of emptiness. I feel immense relief. Yeah, this is a celebration to me.

I feel fantastic. It's day and night because 80% of this season has seen Guy Montgomery and myself watch Sex and the City, the movie, at a strange time of the day for both of us, separately and alone, in front of just a laptop screen and then attempt often, for some reason,

still takes 20 minutes to get a Skype call to work so that we can get on the blower and dig through this shit. This season, more than anything, is a real triumph of drive because nothing really helps our comedic rhythm

when you're digging up the corpse of an old podcast concept 14 months later than a relentlessly laggy connection between New York City and Auckland, New Zealand. I think it really helps tee you up for a smooth run home. Quite like, oh, oh. Did you? Well, you go. Yeah, it's terrible.

And famously, I don't edit the damn thing because I refuse to. Guy doesn't even listen to it. I think that's fair. You've been there. But no, I do feel good. I just feel like I should feel better. But I might still be hungover from Portland. Well, that's true.

I would also posit a more terrifying theory that was floated by Janie during The Watch, that's true. I would also posit a more terrifying theory that was floated by Janie during The Watch, which is Charlotte, because I've always taken issue with Charlotte. I don't know what she's like in the TV show, but in the movies, she's right up there with the others as

the worst of them. But she is someone who, from what I understand, we ought to believe, has been given everything she could want in life and yet still feels a deep sense of unease or unhappiness, which is pretty much the scariest thing I can imagine, to have everything materially that you thought you wanted and still not feel.

And also personally, she's married, they've started a family, to not have what you want. And my fear is that you are experiencing some sort of similar Inuit to Charlotte, whereby Shit, dude. There is something awry, deep within your soul

that not watching Sex in the City does not have any account fixed. Man, I respect what you're saying. You might have struck something. I think there's a combination of, so like my dad's not religious, but he is British, right?

So he comes from... That's what I usually say to people. The famous second half of that sentence. I mean, you know, it's like I was raised religious, but now I'm just sort of like British. When you leave the church

for five years you have to become British. Some stay on. You weirdly get dual citizenship. It's a strange trade-off. I think there is a line of that Presbyterian work ethic and values that has transferred down that line where I think there is only value in things.

I don't think this academically, but I think this might be in my DNA, that I only think there's value in things where there is suffering. Well, I mean, yeah, truth be told, as the co-host of the very same podcast with you, I think, yeah, there might be a truth to that. The truth is that I believe that? Yeah, no, that you believe that. And that might be why we did it.

I mean, because I remember starting this to be friends. I did not know that you wanted to start it so you could experience some weird fucking form of hereditary Presbyterian suffering. It's not not. But I think what Tim is saying is that it's not, that's not a conscious thought.

It's just baked into his every action. What do you think, Paul? Where do you fall down on that? Do you think that things can only have worth if there's a bit of suffering to get it? I was raised a bit of that way as well. Certainly not Protestant, but there was the idea that not that everything you enjoy. Certainly not Protestant, but there was the idea that not that everything

you enjoy must come from suffering, but that if you enjoy something, you have to remember that there is, that other people are suffering, and so you shouldn't enjoy it as much as you are enjoying it. Because, look, you have this thing to enjoy, other people have nothing to enjoy.

Now, how much do you enjoy that thing? Yeah, well, less. Less now, sure. But I think that there are certain things that in life that we should just be able to enjoy. I think that they were put here for our

enjoyment. This is Guy's school, I feel like. He really believes. Why can't we just have a good fucking time? The beauty of nature... Controversially. Are we not supposed to enjoy the beauty of nature? Is there supposed to be

some suffering in that? Are we supposed to feel bad that we are touched by looking at a sunset or at the ocean continually coming to us and then receding from us. Are we supposed to not enjoy that on its own? Are we supposed to feel bad in some way?

I think with nature, you're just allowed to enjoy it. That's what I think. But then with people and things like that, you have to think about not enjoying it. But when it comes to nature. With people. People and things like that. Like friendship? People and things like that. Like friendship? People and things of that nature.

No, yeah, like, no, I don't know. I just, I'm all for having a good time all the time. But I do remember, Paul, so when we were, it must have been midway or two-thirds of the way through season two, Sex and the City 2, again, you host us in your beautiful home. And I remember when we left, I when we were, it must have been midway or two-thirds of the way through season two, Sex and the City 2, again, you host us in your beautiful home. And I remember when we left, I remember Tim saying, man, I feel so empty.

And the other thing I remember was... Are you sure that wasn't me saying that as you left? Yeah, that's why we had to get you out of the car. He said, boys, I feel so empty. We said, Paul... Hopped up from the back seat. Who's empty? Boys, I feel so empty.

We said, Paul. Hopped up from the backseat. Who's empty? But you warned us, and you really pulled us aside, and you said, boys, no more. You're wasting your youth. You're wasting your most vibrant years. What you have to understand is I'm older than these guys. And so I see life from a different perspective in that I totally understand the impulse when you are in your 20s and you feel like life stretches out before you and you can't even see the other side.

That this seems like a good idea, right? Because they're making new time every day. But from the vantage point of just a few years later, you see what a terrible idea this is and that you mustn't do it. And I told them then, and that was your second season of the podcast. And I said, okay, I think you've gotten all that you should ever get out of this. And then this is the fourth season. So, like, they watched We Are Your Friends.

I didn't say a word. I let it go. That is mighty big of you. But I will also say, where were you then, Paul? Because that was grueling. That was what? Are you saying

I looked down and saw only one set of footprints? So now that you have completed another season of this show, I'm going to say it in front of witnesses now. Don't do this again. Don't do this again. There's more to you than this.

There's other stuff that you can do that would be fun. Don't do this again. Well, I think it's time to get a different perspective from another co-host. No, what? Let me just dig around and yeah, here we go.

I found him. I don't know if this is in terms of chronology whether or not this information is out in the public. It isn't. But Tim famously lost this knife in Portland. Now, here's what this looks like to me for the listener. If you can't hear it, it looks like you're holding a drawing of a knife. It's ceramic, Paul, because on several occasions,

I've had the knife with me in a slightly different form, and I keep going through airports and forgetting to put it in luggage. That seems like a big forget, Dan. Yeah, and it is. And every time I need to renew the physical form of the knife, so the spirit of the knife is imbued into a different physical object, which is a different knife. This one is ceramic,

so I think it won't even get tripped up by metal detectors and whatnot. Right? I've said it before and I'll say it again. This is not a benefit to this knife. Also, they do x-ray stuff. You're saying you're going to keep it on your person to walk through the scanner? Now that you say it out loud,

it doesn't sound like a great idea. May I see this knife? Because it looks very strange tim lives with three people who are one chopping knife short right now now did you did you did you like ben break off the tip the very i don't know what happened there someone used it as a knife in my house and i don't know what they were thinking. Because it's the knife. It's not a knife. Oh, it's a Savannah. Yeah, don't...

You should throw this away. You should not... You shouldn't... Don't take this on an airplane. Don't try to take it on an airplane. No, no, it'll be okay. It's not going to be okay. It'll be fine. I guarantee you it won't be okay. It's not made of metal. It also seems like it should go with a dollhouse.

I know what you're saying. I'm going to hold onto this, Tim. I won't be okay. It's not made of metal. It also seems like it should go with a dollhouse. I know what you're saying. I'm going to hold on to this, Tim. I don't like that. Yeah, I know you don't. And that's why it's important I do. Because in every previous episode with the knife, it has been you who was holding the knife and me who was knife-less.

Yes. I'm neutral. Did you notice that I kept the sheath on because you got very freaked out when I kept making stabbing motions at you? Which the guy then turned the knife on me and said, hey Tim, how do you feel when I do this? And I said, hey, you know what?

Not good. Respect. I'm not going to thank someone for not gesturing towards me with an unsheathed knife. That's fair. That is too low a bar. Paul, what was your experience of revisiting this film? When was the last

time you saw it? I saw it probably the year that it came out on cable, maybe? That it premiered on cable? Sounds like 2009 to me. Probably something like that, yeah. It was a good year. So you didn't pay to see this? Great year. What?

I've never paid to see this now let me walk the audience through my experience of having you guys come over and watch the film these guys show up at my door bang right on time right on time

we said 2.30 bing bong they're here at 2.30 they come in I'm very happy to see them my wife Janie can I make an insert? absolutely Paul very suspiciously opened the small latch

that he looks through we have like a little a little guard door in our door which I very much enjoy and I will open it up and always peer suspiciously at whoever it is

and then Guy I think started say, it's just us. And I closed the door and then opened the larger door and let them in. Very happy to see them. Hugs all around. We sit down. I realize I don't know how we're going to watch the movie. So I open up the old Apple TV and I just do a search for Sex and the City, thinking it'll be on, surely, it'll be on HBO Go. It is not.

The only option available is to rent it for $4. And I said, oh. And then Tim said. Sex and the City 2 is available on HBO Go. All of Sex and the City. Sex and the City 2 is available on HBO Go. All of Sex and the City, Sex and the City 2, Sex and the City the movie? Uh-uh. So when I expressed a little concern having to rent this movie, which was never part of the deal, Tim said, oh, I have my laptop in my car. I don't know why you wouldn't bring your laptop in from the car,

whether or not it's going to be part of the proceedings or not. Don't leave a laptop in the car, no matter where you are, ever. So he brings it in. We're trying to figure out, are we going to just mirror it to the Apple TV? Tim brings in his weird laptop that is a two-piece. I don't know if you're familiar with these I can't believe I'm getting called out on this

I honestly thought it was broken and that it still somehow separated it was like I'm making it work they don't have to be connected to each other they do it to be near each other for reference it's a tablet that's got a wireless detachable keyboard don't have to be connected to each other. They do it to be near each other. For reference,

it's a tablet that's got a wireless detachable keyboard. There you go. And did they make a lot of those, too? No, they didn't. Then Tim produces a jump drive that he plugs into

some part of his laptop and puts the movie on the jump drive. Then he hands the jump drive to me, and for a second I thought, these guys are just giving me a virus. This is like an elaborate prank show where the joke is, because they like the suffering so much,

they inconvenience themselves as much as possible. So they book travel to America to put a virus on my laptop. So there it is. It's on there. We throw it up on the screen and we watch the film.

We had a great time. We did a lot of comments over the course of watching the film. I loved that. I was nervous all day. I remember when we last watched Sex and the City 2 with Paul. We got there, Paul said,

okay, so obviously we're not talking when the movie's playing. Our hearts sunk. From the perspective, yeah. Now that was not out of respect for the film. I had seen that movie once before, but I wanted to watch it as if we were just watching a movie and to see how long we could go before we had to start talking to each

other. And it was like, it was hard. It was hard. I mean, I appreciate the integrity of it. It was a bad idea. I just wanted to see. It was a bad experience and no word of a lie, the whole day I was dreading coming to your house because as you said, you are a few years older than us and so you you get some sort of reverence

where i was like we're gonna go in his fucking house and this guy paul is gonna fight he's gonna fucking say don't you talk during this movie wait wait are you under the impression that because i i am from a previous generation i have such reverence for film that I would consider it an insult. Yeah. What do you think the game is between us? Three, four? Yes, I don't know. But alas, something's happened in your...

Some incredible thing has happened in your life where we just... We breezed through this. We were riffing. We were having a lot of fun. We were having breezed through this. We were riffing. We were having a lot of fun. We were having a lot of fun. We were having a lot of laughs. After the movie was over, my wife Janie caught a name in the credits of the actress Carrie Bichet,

who was in Halt and Catch Fire, who is in almost the first frame of the movie as a 20-something, dreaming 20-something? Dreaming girl. Dreaming girl. Dreaming 20-something girl. She's looking in the window at an expensive label of something and apparently dreaming of owning that thing.

She's kind of like a Carrie Bradshaw stand-in from a previous, like when she first got to New York City. Which Carrie's opening narration is like, young women come to New York for labels and love. And if that's not obvious enough, Fergie has written an original song called Labels and Love, which sort of outlines a very similar idea. Oh dear, no.

Was this part of the film? Yeah, yeah. We listened to it in the cab right here. Why? Why? Hold on, hold on, we'll get to it. do it in the cab right here. Why? Why? Hold on, hold on. We'll get to it. Okay, so I wanted to go back

and see this actress in her big screen debut as someone sighing over materialistic goods. And so I took the movie back to the beginning. I just, like, scrolled it back to the beginning. And then these guys got very nervous

that we were going to start watching the movie again. Just seeing the opening, the production credit, titles, and stuff like that made them very anxious. Which intellectually is silly because Paul, on several occasions, was aghast at the length of this thing. I really thought it was much shorter than Sex and the City 2. But it's the same length. Probably my favorite moment of the watch, sort of a meta shining light for today, was when,

did you just say, well, surely it's not as long as the second one? I did, for sure. No, it is. And you just said, what? I said, that can't be so. Completely incredulous. But it was, again.

Yeah. So I... Once more. As I have found it nearly always to be. So I ejected the jump drive from my laptop, and when I went to unplug it, I noticed it was boiling hot. I've never experienced this before.

We all passed around to feel how hot this jump drive was. Satan's jump drive. I bought the damn thing because it cracked me up. It's a little 32 gig USB. They barely exist anymore in that kind of small capacity. And it was really heavy yeah it's like

it's like a Soviet item yeah it is like it weighs a lot it's substantial it may have depleted uranium or something

I'm not sure and the damn thing heats up when you use it it tickles me I love it it's doing a bad job that's how you know

it's working it's doing a bad job of doing'll tell you no, it's working. It's doing a bad job of doing a very basic thing. So then the guys left, hugs at the door. At one point, I was in my stocking feet because I'm at home.

And Guy was in flip-flops. And as we went in to hug, our toes almost intertwined as if our feet were shaking hands. It's one of the most intimate moves I know. It really felt intimate. I didn't see this telling of it makes me feel ill. When you practice a move for that long, Tim, it happens almost like clockwork.

It's like the opposite of dancing. Guy put the movie soundtrack on in the lift ride here to the venue and at first... Oh, did he give you the cable? I asked for the cable.

Hey, we want to hear our music. Guy said, do you mind if we put some music on? He said, sure. Here's the cable. And I think up until the point where the driver said, here's the cable, Guy was just like, we're in the car for 25 minutes,

listen to some tunes, get in a good mood while we're going to the venue. But then he remembered, if I've got the cable, I'm in charge. It's one of the main rules so yeah puts the original soundtrack score on and i'm like jesus fucking christ my guy what's this what are you doing confused and angry yeah the two emotions and then as it ended we got through the song because you thought it would be funny for us to listen to the entire track um which admittedly kind of funny but then the next song started playing from the movie and i

realized oh we're just gonna listen to the soundtrack and then i sort of just accepted that and let it wash over me and there was a certain catharsis it was like being at a wake saying goodbye to something yeah it was really nice and what you learn when you listen to the original motion picture soundtrack after you've seen the movie 53 times is and you guys would have to work so fucking hard to access this information like you are so lucky i'm sharing any of this but they have uh and they did this with all sorts of movies and soundtracks, but I guess I'm so used to hearing the songs a certain way,

but both original score songs written by Fergie and Jennifer Hudson have been quite judiciously edited for efficient use in the movie. And I'm thinking, if someone is over this with regards to the soundtrack, where was this person when it came to the script and the editing process? They know you can do it. You can take bits out. We need to tell some people in Hollywood

that you can take bits out. But then the question is also raised that if they didn't edit out any of the film, why did they bother editing the songs? Why not just let the entire song play under whatever is happening? Well, they did a couple of times. The sequence

where we listen to Run DMC and Aerosmith for the parade of outfits. It's like the whole fucking track. That never happens in a film. It's crazy. Absolute madness. I want to get to something, unless you've got something important. You don't.

Paul, we ask all our guests, there's a particular scene in the movie where they're using euphemisms for how much sexual intercourse they're all having with their partners. And Carrie Bradshaw refuses to indulge them with this information, but she says, when Big Colors,

he rarely, how do you pronounce it in American? He rarely stays inside the lines. Yeah. Did Sarah Jessica Parker just walk in here? We've got another surprise for everyone. It's cheap! Come see my knife, Sarah!

I just finished watching this for 53 points. Hey, Sarah! I just watched your movie 53 times in 6 months Would you like to see my knife? Hey, you want to see this cool thing that Paul and Guy can do with their feet? Paul, what do you think Carrie is talking about

when she's referring to coloring outside the lines? Now, at first blush, it sounds very filthy. Yeah, you physically recoiled. I think I did. Well, I was shocked. My wife was there. I didn't know we were watching a smoker. So he rarely colors within the lines.

Was that the? Inside the lines. You tidied up the dialogue. I'm just trying to save us all some time. I think that it's not meant to be taken as a sexual euphemism. I think the idea... Even though they've been talking about sex, it's very curious that she refuses to talk about sex.

These four women who have talked about nothing but for their entire relationship, and now all of a sudden, no, I'm not going to talk about this. It leads me to believe that when they have what we would think of as sex... With you? When they have what we would think of as sex. With you? It quickly moves beyond just the physical communion and it veers into a sort of a quantum state where there may be phasing in and out of realities or the lines.

What I like to imagine is Carrie and Big sitting nude and cross-legged across from each other, you know, criss-cross applesauce. They touch palms beginning at the tips of their fingers and then rolling up to touch palms beginning at the tips of their fingers and then rolling up to touch palms. And then the process begins where it starts as a small vibration. But it increases, it increases.

Pretty soon, they're just two blurs. But then they come into sharp focus and the room around them blurs and you see Abraham Lincoln But then they come into sharp focus and the room around them blurs. And you see Abraham Lincoln knocking the gun out of John Wilkes Booth's hand. You see Moses and the Israelites dying in the desert after one year. You see God's great wrath descend upon the earth, and then everyone's fine with it. So I think the reason she's being so secretive about it is because she's going to melt their brains.

They can't hear this. Right. They're not ready. They're concerned with these mundane things. Yeah. they're not ready they're concerned with these mundane things Miranda they haven't had sex in six months

so her husband cheats on her like there's no discussion about it you know what I mean Samantha this boyfriend who nursed her through cancer she's bored then she doesn't like spending time in LA there's no solution

so and then Charlotte of course is just she's got what is her problem at this point at that point

in the film nothing I think nothing she was fine she was just living through the problems of the other people correct

yeah and just absorbing all of their pain and just mirroring their anger at various things. And meanwhile, Carrie is carrying around this intense... Metaphysical secret. Yeah. It's Schrodinger's orgasm, isn't it? For those uninitiated,

you're not sure if it's even fully happened or not. I didn't want to say that, but I'm glad you did. It sort of changes the entire... It's a shame we only found out now, because the rest of the movie is quite... Why she's so upset by the jilting, of course, in our realm, that is upsetting on a pretty primitive level.

But if you lose access to this... Yeah, but here's the thing. I feel like there are moments of the film where we see these other realities come into play. When she gives that hideous handbag to Jennifer Hudson, everyone pretends it's good. Like this is a handbag that has

cysts on it, like visible cysts on it. They're handles from rock climbing. Handles from rock climbing, exactly. It is a bag that looks like it's been designed purposefully so that it could not go with any outfit.

Yes. Like it is a patchwork there's different colours, patterns and materials used so that no matter what you leaned into, 90% wrong. Betraying the rest of the bag. It's a crazy bag. It's like they asked children for fun.

Why don't you design a line of handbags and then we're going to make one of them. We'll make one of them a real thing. Yeah, and then they did and it was not that one, but a child went away and made it anyway and somehow snuck it into the store. The child who was rejected said, I'll just do it myself. It's a shit bag,

but what you have presented is a beautiful theory. And it is, I mean, yeah, it's really opened up my eyes to a lot of stuff that I sort of previously dismissed in the second half of the movie. It could also explain a lot of the leaps in logic

that were made. We had a lot of fun trying to discern the timeline in the film. And I think that should be a mention. Because what you're talking about is a little bit Doctor Strange-flavored, isn't it?

This kind of transcendental transformation. There's a part where Carrie talks about spring. She has this whole monologue about spring where they literally show people slipping on ice. Yeah. Well, sorry. Okay. Why are we talking about spring? Spring, which is soon, by the way.

That's the time when. But for now. But for now. It was wild. We see Christmas and New Year's, and then we're at Fashion Week, and she says, it's spring now, in the voiceover, in the narration. So there's no getting around that. She's told us it's spring. She's leading us to believe it's spring.

She's told us it's spring. She doesn't say it is spring, but she says springtime as they're walking through snow. She says springtime in New York. This is some Guy Montgomery level of gaslighting, Paul. What do you need

to hear from Carrie Bradshaw's voiceover? What is Guy Montgomery level of gaslighting, Tim? It's the sex thing. Did they have sex? And we are your friends. Well, if they're not going to show it happening, how can we say that it's exactly what I'm talking about?

Guys, this is old business. This is old business. Sorry, we did shut the book on that. You must leave that in the past. I'm getting flashbacks, though. Don't. She mentioned spring. And then suddenly we're in Valentine's Day and we were like, hold on.

Is this movie over the course of multiple years? Here's the thing, though. It might be a credit to the filmmakers that we are not giving them because the rule of cinema is show, don't tell. So she may be saying it's spring, but they're showing us that it is February. That's not how they're rolling. Very unique interpretation of show, don't tell showing us that it is February. That's not how they roll with it. Very unique interpretation of show, don't tell. Show, don't tell. That's on you.

If you listen to the words instead of looking at the images, that's your fault. Paul, who do you identify as of the four gals? Wow. I don't think we even covered this the last time, did we? I don't think so. I remember that we talked about this. Well, you guys go first. You must have settled this by now.

I've always thought I'm a Miranda. I aspire to be a Samantha, but concede I'm probably a Carrie. Wow. Which upsets me, frankly. Got a lot of work to do on myself. Would you have guessed either of those for us? Yeah. Yeah, for sure, 100% I would have.

Do you know, I guess I've never really thought about this before, but I guess if I'm honest, I would be a Carrie. Really? Yeah, because now... What's... Oh, my God. Here's why I say that. Because I think Carrie is essentially the audience surrogate, right?

Yeah. She's supposed to be anyway. She's an unreliable narrator. She's an unreliable narrator? Yes. So am I. She's also an anti-hero. Yeah, well, that's the thing.

The thing about Carrie is that She is, in these movies especially Especially in these movies She's a bad person Who thinks she's a good person And has friends around her who are like No, you're a good person, this isn't your fault Or at best they're like Are you sure you want to do that?

And she just does whatever And I feel like if we're really honest with ourselves, most of us are Carrie. We're the hero of our own stories, but we're really the villains much of the time. I've got you picked as a Samantha.

But now, I'm in a loving, long-term relationship. It's not about that for me The Samantha thing isn't about the sex It's about age I get it I'm older than you I'm sorry

Look soon I'll be out of your way Wish you fucking would I don't like that I don't like that at all I feel To say that you're a Samantha And it's not a sex thing is a contradiction of two. That's her one thing.

That's the entirety of her character. It's literally as much thought as they gave her. It's joyous. I forget that she has a job sometimes. Like everyone else I can nail down. Although I did have to ask what Charlotte did before she had kids. Because I didn't remember. And I asked, did she have a job?

And then one of you guys said... Guy said she was an art gallery. Yeah, and I was like, I'm done being interested. She used to be an art gallery. She used to be an art gallery. Then she had some daughters. Samantha is a character who is, I get like, the

hedonistic thing is sort of a metaphor for just like, celebrate. That's why is sort of a metaphor for just like celebrate. That's why I've got Guy Peaked as a Samantha as well. People who just enjoy life and people and they've got a generosity of spirit because they love slinging it round, you know? What is it? But do you think the character of Samantha

would spend four years of her life devoting multiple hours to a thing that she did not enjoy? No. That's true. But that's pretty... She kind of does in the movie. She says, I've given it five years and 15 pounds. This is when she's breaking up with Smith Jared.

Yeah, it's his fault that she gained weight. Yeah, of course. Everything that goes wrong in her life. None of the problems these characters face can be traced back to their actions. No, never. This seems crazy, but I can't believe we're talking about the movie.

I've heard this a few times recently where it's just the absurdity of the fact that we are still earnestly discussing this film is fucking funny, dudes. That's funny stuff. The real challenge of the podcast is it is always funny in theory and 49% of the time,

it is almost funny in actuality as well. I would like to continue talking about it, though I've written down a shining light. Oh, great. So help me God, I hope the lads have too. My shining light, it was very early, but when the opening montage where we see, and this never happens in real life,

I understand they're using it as a storytelling measure, but Carrie's walking down the street and she's saying, that's why you need friends, friends in the form of Charlotte York. And as she says the name, down the same channel of sidewalk, the friends will appear. And then you say another name and they'll be, you know, presumably further down the sidewalk and another friend will appear. And in between these cuts and shots of these friends.

Once you almost dropped his phone, he just caught it with the reflexes of a Spider-Man. Yeah. It was so good. just caught it with the reflexes of a Spiderman. Yeah. It was so good. Don't clap for my reflexes. I am an alpha. Paul's not taking that for 30 seconds. That is absolute life.

I spent the whole screening telling Paul that he's an alpha like Mr. Big. That's which gal you are. Yeah, yeah. You're John Preston John James Preston When did we learn that? JJ to the friends he doesn't have

When you fight Universes collide And time melts He was so far ahead of Like this character is so far ahead of Don Draper Of being a guy who just has Whatever his past was. We have no idea.

Yeah. Right. He just reinvented himself at the wedding. He had a couple of family members that we saw. His family members are on the list of people who are invited. I imagine that as we don't meet them, that they don't attend. Right.

Not that we ever fucking kick the door down and made it into that goddamn reception. they promised. I know it's a silly... I owe you money. We made a bet. I bet him that one week, Big would not jilt carry. This is seriously

messed up. Every single time he... I've got money here. I'm going to give you 50 American dollars. Wow. Absurd. Is that what the bet was? It might have been 100. I'm going to give you 50 American dollars. Wow. Absurd. Is that what the bet was? We are. It might have been 100. I'm stiffing the guy.

I was. He's a sucker. I was doing the math. I think we are not even making money on this tour. Do not give me $50. You cannot part with it. It's okay. This will help you make money and me lose some more.

But no, you see, they're walking down the street, and as they get further and further, and new characters introduced, they've obviously, they didn't know how they were going to edit it, and so they got one extra, this just regular guy in slacks and a white shirt, who is walking in the most fucked up zigzag

all around this woman. He's behind them at one point. He's in front of them. Suddenly he's on their right. He's behind them at one point. He's in front of them. Suddenly he's on their right. He overtakes them on the left. It is anarchy. Do you think this plays into what Paul was mentioning with the kind of metaphysical presences

that are, it is like blinking in and out. Yeah, yeah. I've never seen it before and as I saw it this morning I thought, were it not, I don't know, he's either a terrifying predator or a victim of reckless editing. But he is, either way, a joy. I'll never get to see him. That's the truth.

Not unless you watch it on your leisure time. Not happening. That's a contradiction of terms, actually. What was your shining light, Paul? When they go to Mexico and they're getting... I love that whole bracket of the film as well.

Oh, boy. It was absolutely necessary and it needed to be as long as it was. That is a great review for the entire film. Here's what I was thinking. When they go to Mexico, which I had forgotten that that happened, I was like, okay, so they're

doing that for some production value. The whole time it's in hotel rooms. Yeah. There's no production value. It's not like there's any beautiful set pieces of them. Like in the second movie, at least, you got a lot of vistas. You know what I mean? This is just like, there's no way they're in Mexico.

Absolutely not. Not at all. They're here. They're definitely here. They were probably in this here. They were in Studio City for sure. It was the only way they could sneak in Charlotte's implicit racism towards Central America. That's right. It would have been jarring

if she was just doing it from New York. So they're checking into the hotel and they're like getting the lay of the hotel and they're getting the lay of the land and they get into the room and Carrie just wants to get on the bed they start to have an extremely personal conversation I think it's Samantha and Miranda

have an extremely personal conversation about Carrie and in the middle of them is this concierge who's just smiling back and forth as if he is their friend and he knows exactly what they're talking about and is in agreement with what they're proposing. We have all at some point been there. The spider monkey has fallen. It was a spider man.

And yes. Did you say Spider-Man? Yeah. I was talking to Tim. But at some point, we've all been the concierge, where you are next to... We've all had this experience. Next to, but not in a conversation,

and you think, now what does it look like when I'm involved in a conversation? I think this is an approximation of that. It's a good feeling. Tim, shining light? Yeah. You don't have one. No.

You're naughty. That's so wrong. I honestly, the shining light for me was one that I've had previously, but I want to end the season on this because it's so good is samantha when asked how her flight was replying fabulous that's cool no one says that this is quite a nice bookend because this is bigger than the line it's it's bigger than the movie that represent you've spoken about it with me so much what does her saying fabulous

represent to you? It's just so positive I've only done the sort of, what do you call it? Transcoastal flight? Yeah, transcoastal flight Well now it sounds weird I think I've done it like three times and and it's always sucked massively, and it's very turbulent.

Yeah, flying is horrible. Yeah. It's the worst. It shouldn't happen. We shouldn't be up there. It's not for us. I think if we're going to be up there, it should be better. Yeah.

If we're going to go to all that trouble. You're right. Yeah. We should have gotten a better version We did, they were Zeppelins Now that's air travel That is traveling Getting a Zeppelin in LA

Before you know it, it's three weeks later You're in New York It's nice to have our best men on the job Air travel's not good Why is no one A single issue candidate in the upcoming election to bring back blimps? Why is no one doing that? One incident happens where the fucking idiots use hydrogen instead of very safe and available helium

and suddenly we can't have Zeppelins anymore. If they would have let Mike Gravel on that stage, we would have heard a lot of blimp talk. Here's my thing. Who is Mike Gravel? He's the guy who got some teenagers to run his Twitter account that's basically saying

like, hey, my esteemed colleagues, you're all war criminals. It's pretty funny. Is he running? He said he's running, but I don't think he's doing anything about it. I think it's basically just the teens making fun of each other. They're the best ones.

Oh, this sounds great. Yeah. The other day, the teens posted a picture on the Mike Gravel account of them eating ice cream in front of a Joe Biden ice cream truck. And they just said, Joe Biden gave us ice cream. We like him. He's good now. It's really funny. Politics can be funny. Let me just say this about air travel. It's so

miserable that I envy the flight attendants and I think, you know what? I would be okay to just stand for most of the flight. It would be more comfortable if you could just like walk up and down the aisles. Are you a nervous flyer? And just lean a little bit. Is that what it is?

You're nervous in the air? No. It's just uncomfortable. Oh, it's just genuinely uncomfortable. Yeah. I don't want to sit next to this guy the whole time. Yeah. Yeah.

You're right. So anyway, in conclusion, bring back blimps, Samantha. Good. Yeah. I think it's pretty impressive what they've done. I agree. I agree. This seems like a weird note to end on, but we've got to end.

Do we really? Yeah, because we really flew by. We've got a thing. I know you've got a thing. What time do we start? Five after? Yeah, five after. So how much time do you want this to last?

We should have had this discussion before. No, no. Let's go for three more minutes. I can't imagine that putting any undue pressure on us to think of something either funny or sentimental. Ideally both. If we do four more, that'll take us right up to nine o'clock. Yeah, that feels good.

The top of the hour. That feels very nice. Then we can do the news and weather. That's right. Kick off a hot three in a row. I want to say very quickly, I don't know if it's been discussed before because I refuse to listen to the podcast, but...

Respect. Well, I don't want to watch... Do I want to watch someone get kicked in the face over and over again? No, I don't. I'm with you. Too much Lily in this movie.. Too much Lily in this movie. Way too much Lily in this movie.

You were ropeable. I was so mad. I was so mad. Because the first they have this big conversation about, you can't say that word in front of her. Then she's just always there, and they don't bother having any kind of rules about her at all anymore.

Yeah. But it's also, she's not, her presence isn't adding anything to the scene or the story. It is a diversity win. We had a lot of talks about diversity wins

on our screening. The cab driver who nods. Diversity win. Diversity win. Carrie's imaginary friend. Yeah. Jennifer Hudson. Big diversity win.

That's a big diversity win. Even though they did restrict that diversity win to the mind of the protagonist, as represented on camera, it appears to be a diversity win. But she opened up the door to more diversity wins. She goes home to St. Louis. That's right. In Carrie's imagination. And she falls in love with another diverse person.

There's all these other diverse people at a party. Yeah. Yeah. He falls in love with another diverse person. There's all these other diverse people at a party. Yeah. It's a perilous movie, and it's perilous to talk about. It's a perilous movie. But yeah, it really bothered me how much that little girl was in this movie.

Yeah, you got so angry that at one point, Lily is not even represented by her physical being on screen. She is scribbled on a card. As soon as Carrie turns the card and sees that Lily is written on it, Paul said, what the fuck? He's paraphrasing. There was a shot I hadn't even

seen her in before. It's very The Shining where she's just in the back playing with her toys while the grown-ups are talking. You're like, she's fucking here as well. They just keep cutting away to her for some reason. It's just a very gentle... Kids are cute. Kids are cute.

They're bankable. I've seen cuter kids. She's an adorable little girl, but half of being a cute kid is doing cute stuff. That's right. Any baby can look adorable. She does ruin a marriage. That's right. You can't just, any baby can look adorable. She does ruin a marriage. That's kind of cute.

The whole, not when you know how powerful their sex is. What? Well, she ruins a marriage. She ruins more than a marriage, like a union between two people

that can be all the time. Okay. Around the genital congregation. Yes. It's not just genitals. From what I heard, it's mostly hand stuff. It's not just genitals. From what I heard, it's mostly hand stuff. It's not just genitals. It's a lot of hand stuff. The genital stuff takes care of itself.

Genital stuff, very down the line, but the hand stuff is out of sight. Yeah. Hand stuff, toe stuff, lily, blimps. Have we not covered it all? And this, our woefully misguided and now complete fourth season of The Worst Idea of All Time, Los Angeles.

Thank you so much for coming out. Paul, thank you very much for joining us. Thank you, guys. Please, a big, big round of applause for Paul. Don't do this ever again. I totally agree, man. Don't do it again. I'm with you.

I am with you. We just have a good rhythm together, you know? He sort of feels me out, I feel him out. And we go for it.