The Worst Idea Of All Time - Episode Fifty Four - Origins

Episode Date: December 13, 2018

Guy and Tim watch Grown Ups (the first one) for the first time ever. Recorded live at Upright Citizens Brigade with a full audience just after the viewing, things get very low energy and tired and depressed. Featuring a birthday boy! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

All right, I'm a rock star. I'm gonna do it like this. How y'all doing? UCB! Rockstar. I'm going to do it like this. How y'all doing? UCB. I'm exhausted. Do you mind if I take a seat? I feel like I want to take a seat like a cool uncle like this. That's not how a cool uncle sits, Tim. I feel like it is. It's making me uncomfortable. It's precarious. You're going to hurt yourself. We've almost made it out of this place unscathed. Hey, everybody. Thank you so much for coming along to the show tonight. Thanks so much if you came along last night. Yeah. Make some noise if you did come along last night as well.

Cool. Cool. Well, for those of you who missed it, that was probably where we expended a lot of the energy. So, you know, don't feel too bad about it though because we've just seen Grown Ups 1 for the first time, and we've got a lot to unpack, Tim. Yeah.

Yeah, there's something unique about all of this, mainly our stupidity and commitment to the stupidity. That's the unique thing. The weird thing is that you guys got on board at some stage, and now we're all in a room together, and I feel awkward. I feel hungover. I feel sleep deprived. I feel like I've been in LA. You look like hell.

I believe you. Normally I would attack you for attacking me but there's no denying it. LA has taken months off my life. And I've been here for about seven days or so. Wonderful town. Great city you got here. Hell of a city. Lots to do. I'm burnt out. I'm jaded. I feel like I've seen it all. You've got here. Hell of a city. Lots to do. I'm burnt out.

I'm jaded. I feel like I've seen it all. You've seen... Ran into a homeless man today, just scatting and riffing on the street, singing some blues tunes to me. Didn't know what to make of it. Thought it was kind of cool that he was singing, had a great voice.

Felt a little depressed he was living on the streets. That's a really good anecdote, Tim. You should buff that out with some more, you know, ups and downs and we could be looking at sort of a stage-ready anecdote right there. Alright. Now, you guys might notice that we're wearing aprons at the moment from Gold's Gym.

We've got to thank our fans, Gart and Eleanor for these. So please give a round of applause to them. I spent real American dollars. Let's get off the seats. I feel like it's going to build tension and energy. If we walk around, strut around, make the stage our own, you know.

Let's get this thing going. So, if you've walked into the wrong room, my name is Tim Batt. This guy's Guy Montgomery, and we've watched the movie Grown Ups 2 52 times. You don't need to applaud for that. You don't need to applaud for that. Yeah, you don't need to applaud for that,

which is genuinely why we're a little bit frazzled right now. We finished doing that last night. We had a big party, and accordingly it's taken, as Tim said, a lot of the edge off the day. We slept until 3 o'clock and still didn't have a copy of Grown Ups ready to watch this afternoon. Luckily the staff here are amazing. Yeah. And we just, we made it work. So we watched Grown Ups 1,

and fuck, I don't even really know where to start. I mean, the obvious question is, which is the better movie? You know? That feels like we should start broad and then start drilling into the details. I came into this movie with great expectations, with a copy of that book by Charles Dickens.

And I didn't get to read any of it because I had to watch it. That's clever, man. You have me. Yeah, I'm a real droll guy, so I'm real witty. Nice. It's great to share it with America. But I genuinely did. I had built it up in my mind, as you might expect,

someone who's been experiencing the other film for so long. And I was really excited to see some of my favorite familiar faces try some other wacky antics. Oh, yeah, and Rob Schneider as well. I was very excited about Rob Schneider. We had a bit of a discussion today about Rob Schneider's history. I was a big fan of The Animal and Juice Bigelow. You owned The Animal on physical media.

I owned it on VHS. Which is baffling to me. But you did. And Juice Bigelow, I got on board with that when it first came out. And Rob Schneider came to party in Grown Ups 1 today. Boy did he. Ladies and gents, let me tell you about Rob Schneider's

character in Grown Ups 1. Firstly, they forgot to give his character a name. So he's the only one who's just his first name. They call him Rob or Robbie. Which is actually kind of neat because I read somewhere that Nick Swartzen is meant to be the brother of Rob Schneider's character in the second

Grown Ups film. Although that's never referenced in either film. You're just supposed to know. It's backstory that they don't deliver to us. But the cool thing about that is Nick's character is also just named Nick. They both just got thrown in as an extra. Maybe to take a bit of the heat off them when the press get their claws out because neither of the films

really followed through. They're fall guys, is what they're there for. But Rob was bloody good, I thought. I'm going back on the chair. This is not working out for me. You're not even wearing shoes, man. At least I've got jandals on, for crying out loud. Talk to me about Rob, Tim.

Rob is a complicated character because he's dating a woman, I would estimate 30 years his senior in the film and there's a lot of sexuality between the two. A lot of overt sexuality. A lot of tongues touching each other. And Rob is a spiritual soul.

Not unlike the real Rob Schneider. I feel like it's actually him, but dialed up. I think that's how they arrived at the character. This was very interesting as well, because there's sort of a few theories flying around as to why Rob Schneider didn't get involved in the second Grown Ups 2, namely he might have had a falling out with Adam or some such.

Hey, how you doing? Yeah, good. So glad you made it. It's live, you know. But the thing is... Ripping and scatting. The thing is, Tim, is that Rob's character was sort of... He was the most bullied.

There's a lot of bullying going on amongst this group of friends, but he was the most bullied of all the characters in the first film. And I feel like that is a direct reflection of the relationship in real life. I feel like maybe off set, off camera, on set, off camera, sorry, Rob was joking around with the other guys and they probably pushed him a little too hard

and he was like, you know what? Fuck you. I'm not going to come back and do your movie again. I might be Rob Schneider, but I have standards, God damn it. And this is breaching those. And Deuce Bigelow 2 is where I draw the line. I'm not going to go beyond that.

But yeah, I mean, did you pick up on that? That Rob was, like, I thought that there was... Oh yeah, it was the butt of every joke. It was, now, it's hard to measure whether I've lost... I've definitely lost a lot of perspective in Grown Ups 2 on account of the fact that I've seen it four and a half dozen times. But I'm trying to map which movie has a meaner spirit

and it feels like Grown Ups 1 does. Grown Ups 1 kept me... It's so fucking hard to know, man. Isn't it? Here's what I... Let me say this. Here's what I enjoyed about Grown Ups 1 versus Grown Ups 2.

There's actually some arcs. People are going through a journey. Roxanne is a stone-cold bitch at the start of the film. Roxanne, Lenny Fader's wife, played by Selma Hayek. She's a very unlikable character, folks. Deeply unlikable.

But suddenly a flick switches inside her when she remembers she can't throw a rock anymore. She can't skim a stone. And then she's like, okay, I'm going to recalibrate my entire life based on this incident. Which seems rash. Yeah, it did seem a mite rash. She was missing a very important fashion show in Milan.

It's quite funny, in the second film, she now owns a run-down boutique store in some small town in Connecticut. Run by Terry O'Shea. Presumably what happened between the films was her career went down the tubes. Yeah. She went walking around the streets of Los Angeles, ran to Sherry O'Terry a couple of days after her Curb Your Enthusiasm episode and said, hey, do you want to work at my store in Connecticut?

Sherry said, why not? And that's pretty much how they wrote that storyline into the second film. What I would love to see is a trajectory for those two, for Adam Sandler and some of Hayek's characters is that, because Adam stepped away from the entertainment world. He's a big shot Hollywood agent in this movie. He's actually kind of quite a strong character. In Grown Ups 2, he's just like a guy with some stuff happening around him, hanging out with his friends. In the first one, though, he's a dude with problems.

He's a father who's got kids that he hates, which is something. If you want to talk about a parent with kids they hate, Eric Lammensoff. Oh, Christ. He was a bad guy in Grown Ups 2. He is possibly a worse guy in Grown Ups 1. We were saying his wife, Susie, should divorce him. Sally. Sally.

Good God. I've seen it 52 times. I mislearned the name and it never changed. I don't know how that relationship has stuck together. Yeah, because Sally's a weird kettle of fish in this movie as well. Breastfeeding her four-year-old son, and like my grandma always said, if they're old enough to ask for it, they're too old to get it.

It's weird seeing a grown, talking human rolling around, sucking on a nipple, which I guess is why they put it in the film. That's why it's a joke. It's hilarious. I didn't find it hilarious. I found it deeply disturbing. And if you were going to draw an inference out of what the result

was, Bean turns out to be learning disabled in the second movie. So I guess the inference is if you leave him on the tit too long, that brain's going to overcook. It's going to be no good. It's going to be no good for school. Won't know how to do math. They call

breast milk brain food in New Zealand because that's what it is. There's a really big black market for it. We're joking. That's the fastest I've ever seen you pull out of a gag. I don't want to spread too much misinformation about where we're from. Guys aware he's a

cultural ambassador. It's not a black market. It's open slather. It's available in stores, supermarkets, dairies. Wetness is everywhere, but it's illegal. It's like prostitution is here. Ironically, prostitution, very legal in New Zealand, but wetness is very illegal. So that's where the demand is, you see. The police force

and the whole government is in tatters over there. There's really no knowing which way is up. Yeah. So that's where the demand is, you see. The police force and the whole government is in tatters over there. There's really no knowing which way is up. Yeah. Tim, I am exhausted. Oh, wait, no, hold on. Okay, I was going somewhere with this. I was going somewhere with this. So as a trajectory,

because we've heard a lot about the... In fact, someone told us last night, Grown Ups 3, because we've heard that the script is being worked on, and what we heard from a gentleman last night is that it's going to be part of the six movie deal that he's just inked with Netflix.

Audible but like inhalations of breath from the crowd there. But of course you can see the product placement was a little more sinister in Growing Ups 1 for me this evening. Back and fast and heavy. There was some really interesting stuff like Coke was obviously one of the prime sponsors

in this first film. They're drinking Fanta. They talk about Sprite and Coke. You see a bit of Coke logos thrown around. What obviously happened is Pepsi saw that and intervened in between, and were like, we're going to throw some of that sweet marketing money

at Adam Sandler and the guys. I don't know. I found it interesting. Obviously, it's not if you haven't watched the movie 52 times. That's okay. Well, there's another potential thing that, it's just you and me, man. Pretend like they're not here. It's you and me in a room.

I'm worried about you, dude. Yeah, I'm coming apart at the seams. You look very, this is the lowest I think I've ever seen you in our lives. Which is ironic, because this is, the whole thing's, well, yeah, the whole thing's behind us now in a way. My little man's all tuckered out from last night. I am tuckered out, Pop Pop.

It's just, it's not, I was so... Oh, it's disgusting what I'm doing. Guy's just tampered with his beer with his foot, now he has to put that to his mouth. It's just, I just wanted it to be good. People had told us it was good, Tim. I wanted to enjoy it, but it's just as fucking like,

it's just as clunky and confused and there's still no through line. It's just a bunch of random scenes scattered across a fucking lakeside setting.

Yeah. It doesn't amount to anything. The closest thing they had to pathos is at the start of the movie when the coach dies and I was invested in the characters.

I was like, this hasn't happened in a grown ups film before and then they throw it all away they just go to a lake and fuck around what do you expect guy

it's not a good movie it's a cash grab it's a family comedy I hate it I'm getting the sense that you did not enjoy our watch of grown ups one I noticed a cool thing

yeah Dennis Dugan, aka The Doctor, Dr. Dugan, he's the director of both films. He played The Doctor in San and Connecticut. I like to think one of the things this movie did do for me was create, sort of put even more texture

into this universe of Adam Sandler films. The Sandlerverse. You know the word. You used the word. You know there's a theory that all the Pixar films take place in the same universe. Yeah. I like to think the same thing with Sandler and so all of his films. I like to think the same thing with David Hasselhoff. Yeah, I know you do.

So like Mitch Buchanan from Baywatch and Michael Knight are the same guy. And the David Hasselhoff that we know from the YouTube video where he gets drunk and he's eating a hamburger being a really bad dad I don't wanna that's the same guy but just at a different stage of his life

but that's a man who's lived yeah not always been a good dude but when he gets to the pearly gates in St. Peter's he's like

what have you done with your life he's like well I was a lifeguard and a spy kind of with a cool car I brought down

the Berlin Wall I'm David Hasselhoff bitch sung in German sung a little hard out caused change in the world well what I noticed was Dennis Dugan

was the basketball referee at the very start of this movie nice so he's bringing a Hitchcock vibe where he inserts himself into every film

and he's like guess what but moreover it's the same character so he eventually retired because he couldn't keep up with the pace of intermediate school basketball. Went to university, got himself a med degree and started earning some pretty sweet cash down at the local medical clinic.

But sadly, he started burning the candle at both ends because he kept up some night exercise as a referee. And that's why he's the raging alcoholic party animal that he is. And it's probably why he's directing these god-awful films. Well, I've got two questions for you. Number one, how long do you think it takes to become a doctor from scratch? Seven years. How long do you think there is between the first and second movie? I like to think they happen in consecutive days.

So then, what the fuck is going on with Dennis Dugan? Well, we've also stumbled into other conspiracy theories. Have we stumbled into another warlock? Yeah, he could be a time-travelling warlock. I mean, anything's possible. But people, I can't remember if we've talked about it or people have spoken to us about it, about the fact that the days in this universe are hellishly long.

Yeah, there's a real purgatory vibe to it. There's like 700 hours in a day like a casino you don't you don't get any sense of where or when you are you know that you're just existing because conceivably Adam Sandler on the phone at the start

he says happy July 4th right so it's July 4th and then at the end of the day they're watching bloody July 4th fireworks yeah they use at least

it's cute that you call it July 4th and not the 4th of July. It tickles me. My brain's not going. I know. But, okay, so the thing is, though, within the film, they used to cut between scenes that didn't have an ending, they would just use a shot of the lake at sunrise.

Yeah. So that happened three times. So within the one day, there were still three cycles of the sun. Wow. Now, what's to say that there were more of those sunrises that they just didn't have to insert because some of the scenes had logical endpoints? Does any of this make sense? Kind of. What you're suggesting is pretty terrifying, though.

It's very Groundhog Day. So you go to sleep and it's nighttime and you wake up and it's morning, but you're in the same day. Yeah, but there's a whole lot of other people who it's happening to as well. It may be happening at different rates because we know, okay so Dennis Dugan it's happening enough that he can become a doctor

in the course of one day but with like Becky Fader she ages approximately three years but then Greg Adam Sandler's son in the movie... He goes through... Holy crap!

Puberty hits that boy like a ton of fuck. He is a different dude. He's getting hairs where he's never had hairs before. Yeah. And his voice is completely different. His face looks rearranged. He's presumably discovered marijuana because his eyes are glazed in the second film

but they were bloody wide open in the first. But Adam Sandler's other son hasn't aged a day. So he is the audience surrogate. He's the one representing the people. Fuck. Now what's going on with Rob Schneider? Because he obviously, his vessel... Rob Schneider metamorphosized into Nick Swartzen.

Whoa, okay. He found drugs. He blew out. His face changed. Boom, Nick Swartzen. So Nick, in the second movie, is like Gandalf the Grey to his original Gandalf. I'm not with you. I don't know how these people could be, but keep talking.

No, Gandalf the White. You guys know Lord of the Rings, right? Gandalf the White is when he comes back after death, right? Okay, so Nick Swartzen is Gandalf the White. You guys know Lord of the Rings, right? Gandalf the White is when he comes back after death, right? Okay. So Nick Swanson is Gandalf the White to Rob Schneider's normal Gandalf. Yep, sure. It's just, it wasn't good. And it was unreasonable of us to expect it to be good.

You really had your hopes up. I did. I've been bloody giddy all week. Like, oh, I can't wait. It's going to be so wonderful to see these characters do different things. Can you just... They're not likeable characters. Real quick, make some noise if you have seen Grown Ups 1.

In your life, yeah? Okay, a few people. Cool. Make some noise if you enjoyed the film. Okay, cool. I just wanted to Make some noise if you enjoyed the film. Okay, cool. I just wanted to check we're all in the same place. Should we explain the plot? I would love to try.

Yeah, okay. Let's do it. Act one. We open on a family headed by the patriarchal Adam Sandler. No. Oh, shit. Have I got it wrong already? Yeah.

Oh, no. Act one. A children's basketball game. Oh, you're right. That's really important to the film. An inspiring coach. A game-winning shot from Lenny Fader, a.k.a. Adam Sandler. Aged.

It's 1987. you do the math. They all live in Standing, Connecticut. They celebrated a lakeside house. Act two. The coach is now dead and it's the modern day. Well, hold on. That's like scene two, isn't it? I don't want to do the plot anymore, Tim. I've changed my mind.

Okay. Do you reckon you could do a logline for this film? Let's play the executives game. Yeah, that's fun. Pitch me grown-ups one. You work for Sony Pictures, right? The fuck are you doing in my office? Sensing a little hostility.

Yeah, I don't know who the hell you are. I work for Sony Pictures. That's right. What have you got for me? Firstly, who are you? My name's Ryan McSee. And... What nationality are you, Ryan?

Your last name felt like it was going to another syllable and then it just stopped. Yeah. I'm a New Zealander. Okay. And I've got to be honest with you, my heart's not really in this pitch. Yeah.

My boss made me come along. I haven't really prepared anything and neither has he. So I'm just going to spit balls to my dears. Well, I like everything you're saying so far. So please continue. We've got Adam Sandler. Are you in? Let's get you a check.

That's pretty much how those meetings go. It is interesting to try and think about how this did get greenlit. But I guess when you're Adam Sandler, he's got a whole... Do you know how you greenlight this movie? How? You fucking put David Spade, Chris Rock, Kevin James and Adam Sandler on a poster. And Rob Schneider. You don't put Rob Schneider on the poster.

You put his name in a slightly smaller font on the poster, sure. And then people go and watch what happens. That's how this movie comes into fruition. All right. I took some notes and I'm going to review them. Good on you. Because something I wanted to bring up was heckling at a funeral. What a great idea.

I think we need to start turning funerals into roasts on a more consistent basis. I don't think this should just happen in Adam Sandler films. I want to start attending funerals where people are jiving each other. Lighten the tone. Yeah. Even before the funeral, there was a lot of... All of the jokes in the first break of this movie are pretty much like the classic stand-up formula of

this is like that. It's just a bunch of similes they throw at each other for about 30 minutes. Yeah. And then they do it through a funeral. No, they're not. They're not particularly well thought out. In fact, if I had to go out on a limb,

I'd say there was no script. I think there was a script in this first one. Do you? It's hard to say. Do you want me to heckle when you die? At your funeral? I think it would be appropriate. Yeah. Do you want me to heckle you? When I'm dead? Yeah.

Yeah, well, it's not really any of my business what you do when I'm dead yeah yeah well it's not really any of my business what you do when I'm dead really I'm really indifferent towards the whole thing I'm dead

if I clear it with your mum and dad because I'm assuming they will both outlive you based on how you live your life would it be cool if we kind of turned your wake

into a roast of you? That would be absolutely... That would actually be really cool. Yeah? Yeah. Okay, cool. Would I be able to reciprocate?

Well, should we make a pledge to one another? This is getting real. Yeah, this is getting a bit real. Whoever dies first... Well, hold on. The other one gets to throw... Like, it doesn't have to be the funeral but a roast funeral fuck man i know it's a pretty big decision to make considering how much sleep we've

had in the last week because what if one of us dies young yeah it's going to be really full on yeah yeah dog but this is like the most interested I've been in talking with you so far tonight, so I feel like we should go ahead and do it. Do you know what I'm saying, though? Do you feel excited right now? First to go down, comedy roast by the other? Yes, absolutely. Let's shake on it.

I take this shit really seriously, dude. So do I. I've got two tattoos on my butt from Lost Bets. Yeah, that's true. Okay. Oh, my God. Here we go. Terrifying. That's a weird Okay. Oh, my God. Here we go. Terrifying.

That's a weird commitment. That's really weird. I wish you health and prosperity, friend. Jesus. I don't know how I'm going to pitch that to Mr. and Mrs. Bat. No, no, no, trust me, it's cool. I was going to correct... It doesn't matter.

Oh, yeah, sorry, your mum didn't take... Dr. Brennan. Oh. Yeah. Yeah, she's got a PhD, bro, and, your mum didn't take... Dr. Brim. Oh. Yeah. Yeah, she's got a PhD, bro, and I'd like you to start respecting that. Okay?

I do respect that. Your mother is an angel. What's up with the fact that Laminsov's daughter Donna, in the second movie, she's kind of nice. In this one, they're really playing up, and this is going to sound harsh,

but they've made her a fat bitch. And I... No, it sounds like I'm being really harsh, but they're really playing up and this is going to sound harsh but they've made her a fat bitch and I no it sounds like I'm being really harsh but they're like don't clap for that oh wait no you saw the film you can yeah you watched it with us

so they're playing up a lot of jokes about her eating cake with her hands and being very eager and ravenous to get into the food and that she's a very awful person they they did do that a

lot she was banging on the piano but i also noticed they did that with greg and keithy they just there was no through line for like the actual character all of the characters were assholes out of the gates and then they apparently reformed the lake but it's not really explained how yeah because keithy and greg were really rude they treated their they had a nanny they treated her like a slave it was really like it was quite full on it starts to make you wonder about the lake and to a wider

extent within this franchise the transformative power of water as a theme because we see a lot of water in the second movie as well often related to the mystical powers of Brayden, who is a known warlock. And I'm wondering if there's something about the lake that they're at

which has a... It's beyond behaviour-altering, like soul-altering powers for people who stay long enough at the lodge. Well, and we all know that these people are trapped in purgatory so they had to spend, obviously if you're in purgatory, some time. All time. Or no time. It's possible

that we've underestimated the heady objectives of what this franchise was about. I think a lot of this stuff probably slipped past the cinema going public as well, Tim. I fear that a lot of the people who saw Grown Ups probably did miss that strong motif running through the film. People get thrown off by that poster. That's the problem.

Well, it's a very catchy poster. Yeah. You see a bunch of comedians in like, what are they called? Water donut things? Thank you. For a movie set at a lake. I feel like I could sub someone in from the crowd and they'd do a better job than me right now. That's how I feel like I could sub someone in from the crowd And they'd do a better job than me right now

That's how I feel I feel like we've got a bright room here I feel like I might do it Really? Yeah, who among you will be tribute? Mike, who turned 20 yesterday Come up on stage, Mike A round of applause for Mike, ladies and gentlemen

Not for you, just for a bit I'm really jealous of what you're doing here you're outsourcing this god awful conversation to a recently minted 20 year old let's go for it you just read them out as your own and we'll talk about them I won't be as abusive to you as I am

towards Tim, I don't know you, Mike. It's like written in air quotes, because I'm having a hard time reading. Okay, kids are class. Kids are class. Crass. Yeah, and they're crass, too. I agree.

Both good points, Mike. You're an on-to-it dude. You know, the kids are classy, in comparison to the grown-ups I've found, but they've also, just by virtue of the parenting they've been receiving, they're also kind of crass. And as we were just talking earlier, kind of rude. Have you seen grown-ups, Mike? Fuck no.

Yeah, you're a smart guy, Mike. You'll do well in this world. I've seen clips here and there. Yeah? And it seems like a movie I don't want to watch. As I said, you're a smart guy. It's going to make it very difficult to unpack the movie

though, isn't it? It's going to make this conversation very interesting. What do you imagine from having seen Grown Ups 2, how do you think

Steve Buscemi got his injury? Take us on a tour, Mike. A mystery tour? That's right. So, he lost most of his feeling in his body. That is correct. Now, I'm going to assume, in Grown Ups 1,

Steve Buscemi works at some kind of batting cage. Let's say, you know, it's a small town. There's not much to do. Yeah. Sometimes you want to just take the kids down for some ice cream and, you know, hit some baseballs around. There's a batting cage slash ice cream parlor. Yeah, exactly. That's right.

It's a good business model. Snap that up, Mike. Write it down. Someone in the audience come up with a great name. It's called Mike's. Yeah, Mike's. Great name. We'll workshop it.

We'll get something later. Anyway. We'll figure something out. So he works at the baseball. He works at Mike's. Yeah, he works at Mike's. We'll get something later. Anyway. So he works at the baseball. He works at Mike's. Yeah, he works at Mike's. Batting in ice cream. The owner is a real piece of shit.

So. Mike, I don't want to. You own this business. In fairness, I am a real piece of shit. Okay, well. No, no, no. You're a cool guy. Mike, keep talking. I'm listening.

So speaking of real pieces of shit, Adam Sandler and his family comes up. And they want to hit some baseballs around. Yep. Obviously. That's probably why you go to the cages, right? That's why you go to Mike's. So Adam Sandler's kid, he gets some ice cream. It's Godiva because he loves that shit.

Yeah. And Steve Buscemi is walking in front of the batting machine, the baseball throwing things. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The baseball guns. Yeah, yeah, I'm with you, I'm with you. And one of the employees decides to have a little fun with him, turns up the batting devices all the way, full speed, takes off the inhibitors.

This is one of his colleagues as well, isn't it? Yeah, another employee of Mike's. Oh, wow. Perhaps Mike himself. Wow, perhaps you. This is incredibly meta. So you're playing around with Steve Buscemi at your fantastic business. You've got a great life, Mike.

You're only 20, man. I'm a self-insert character in Grown Ups. That's what I wanted to do. So you're fucking around with the machines. Yeah, I'm fucking around with Steve Buscemi. So the baseballs just come flying at him. And he's getting hit in all sorts of places. It's a Grown Ups movie.

There's a crotch shot. He starts shitting himself, and then he slips on some ice cream, breaks his back. Hey, everybody, a round of applause for Mike. He just took us on an outstanding mystery tour. Thank you so much.

And it's actually, yeah, actually, Mike, we owe you one. You did bail us out of a pretty rough spot, then I'll give you a hug. It's actually a great way to arrive at... We can finally lay to rest the Steve Buscemi Mystery Tour. That was an interesting feeling for me listening to Mike, and I'm sure for you, listening to someone else spitball ideas when we're sitting here with all of the information in the world.

Yeah, that was a really good one. Here's what happens. Here's what actually happened to Steve Buscemi. This has been a long time coming, friend. Yeah. That was the hardest we laughed at the movie. I was in hysterics. Oh, yeah, you lost your shit, man.

That was actually the moment probably where I released all of the expectations I had. Yeah. It was one of those laughs that you hear on your friends when something dreadful has happened and they don't know how to cope. But it was also one of those anticipatory laughs where you can see you sort of see the incident before it happens and you're like well this is going to be bad for this person yeah but it was like oh yes yes lifting the lid on the mystery tour guys continuing the

theme of the restorative power of water in the franchise, this scene is set inside a water park, a water theme park, right? Is that what they're called? Yeah, yeah. That's exactly what they're called. What do you call them here? We call them water parks in New Zealand. And people

are cutting in line and things up the top and interestingly, in this movie, and Grown Ups 2, these three guys are separate, but in this movie and in Grown Ups 2 these three guys are separate but in this movie OJ played by the guy

with the cross eyed with the crazy voices in a lot of Sandler movies Steve Buscemi and Colin Quinn are buddies and they formed a bit of a gang

yeah and they were all at the water park alongside all of the families the Lamansofts the Faders the McKenzie's the who are we missing H, the Higgins,

the Schneiders. Yeah. What is Rob's last name in this? It doesn't matter because he doesn't have kids. Presumably Schneider. So they're at the top of a hydroslide and there's a big kind of flying fox thing. Zipline.

Yeah. Do you guys call them flying foxes here? You don't, eh? That's a museum. That's a Kiwism. You've got to be clear with that. There's a zipline where you grab hold and you zipline over and then you drop into the water and it's quite dramatic because it's a long way out. To be honest, if health and safety saw that, if they'd ever visited this water park, I'm pretty sure that ride would be closed down because there's an accident waiting to happen. There's no harness.

And you're like 20, 30 meters above the edge. You just jump off a platform. There's a lot of concrete and hard plastic before you get over the pool. And there's no buffer at the end for safety. It's just like a wall. And if you forget to let go or get the timing wrong, what's going to happen to you? You're going to steeply seam yourself, which is what happens. Well, you're going to wind up with it.

In a series of increasingly daring escapades, firstly, Adam Sandler's kid takes the reins and he does a pretty impressive jump off. And then Adam Sandler does a pretty impressive jump off. And then Colin Quinn dispatches Steve Buscemi to top it. Wiley. Who, by the way, Steve Buscemi's probably one of the low points. Like, you feel sad for Steve Buscemi's career in Grown Ups 2. He's funny in Grown Ups 1.

His character's really jumpy and eager, and he's wearing a singlet. I thought that was great. I know I've said it before tonight, but I am a little worried about you, bud. He was funny in the movie. Okay. Okay. Agree to disagree. So what Steve Buscemi decides, well, he doesn't decide to do.

What he's bullied into doing is putting his feet in the bits where your hand goes. Like two stirrups. So you hold the stirrups and let go, but Colin Quinn's like, do it with your feet. He didn't ease in the bullying. He was dead on. I thought he was in the room. Yeah, yeah. Very good impersonation.

I'm Colin Quinn. Do it with your feet. You're an animal. Do it. Yeah. I believe in you. Now you sound like Colin Quinn. Do it with your feet. You're an animal. Do it. I believe in you. Now you sound like Colin Quinn. It's good, right? I'm getting confused.

We're very good at that. We're a timid guy, am I right? So one of his feet falls out. The other one becomes lodged in the thing and he can't free it. And he ends up just ziplining himself into a nearby wooden shed and wasting himself against that smashing tree. And then you must have been excited by this,

so then he reappears later in the movie in his full body cast. So animated all of a sudden. Yeah, well, Mike's rejuvenated me. Okay. Like a body of water.

He's got his arms in the air and he's wearing this whole cast and there's a callback to that in the second movie. Yeah, there is.

You speculated was like qualified the time-travelling theory that you stumbled into late one night. On some pretty brain-expanding stuff that we had done that evening. And you were absolutely, not necessarily about the time-travelling, but you were so on point with that. God damn it. We're so far up our own arses, no one knows what the fuck we're talking about.

In the second movie of Grown Ups, there is a party, and it's 80s themed, and at the back of one of the shots, there's a guy in a full body cast in the exact same position as Wiley is put in. It's a very specific position. He's not even in focus.

He's barely in frame. But I saw it. I watched 40-something, right right i saw it in there in the party scene i was like the fuck is going on there and i constructed the narrative about wiley being a time traveler and this kind of verifies that so he's managed to escape the never-ending day groundhog purgatory nature of stanton connect Connecticut. He's managed to find his way through the Matrix and wind up in the second movie

while he's still got the cast on, but he's going back and forward. He's in the party twice anyway. Wow. So that's the Steve Buscemi tour. So now we're all clear on that. God. I feel like we just got out of the bus and we were in the desert i feel like

you're allowed to sub in if you want no no i just feel like that we did we did just essentially finish the steve busey mystery tour and uh so anti-climatic yeah and the destination was a bit of a disappointment yeah it was like when you go to the airliner and you get one of those mystery holidays and you pay three thousand dollars for a return trip for one person, and they're like, guess what? You're going to a slightly southern part of the city that you're already in. Yeah. And you just bumped out.

You're going to one neighbourhood further than you've ever been in your hometown. Yeah. There was a really low amount of payoff, huh? We thought of way better ideas for the mystery tour. We sure did, Tim. You've got a great brain on you. You've got a great pair of legs. I can't wait to see you do some distance running when we get home.

Do you know what I liked about the first Grown Ups movie? Yeah. No. They played around a lot with the gender stereotypes and Chris Rock and Maya Rudolph's relationship, which does not come through in the second film. They really abandoned that thread. Well, they just wrote around the fact... They wanted Maya Rudolph. They wrote around the not come through in the second film. They really abandoned that thread. Well, they just wrote around the fact...

They wanted Maya Rudolph. They wrote around the fact she was pregnant in real life. Is that right? Yeah. I didn't know that. To Paul Thomas Anderson, who I would imagine...

Paul F. Tompkins. Yeah, him too. Wait, which one? She's polyamorous. Okay. Paul Thomas Anderson. No, no, no. I don't know.

I can't remember the point. I've lost my head of steam. Jesus Christ. You're watching a man waste away. Yeah, clearly. So in the first Grown Ups movie, Chris Rock is like cooking meals for the family. He's got an apron on.

There's a lot of jokes at his expense from his mother-in-law about what a little bitch he is. I don't think that. That's the stuff she's saying. Hey, and on that note, Tim, you know in the second movie how there's that what we felt like was really unnecessary scene of interplay between Chris Rock

and his mother-in-law where he's constantly pranking her. Oh, shit! Yeah. Do you feel like that prank that he pulls on her is a just payoff for the taunting that he's been receiving from her? Kind of, except for the fact that the thing I couldn't get around with this movie,

and I don't know if it's an American thing or not, is that just everyone is ripping on everyone else ruthlessly throughout their lives. When they're kids, they're dicks to each other. When they're adults, they're dicks to each other. And I don't... Maybe I don't have a thick enough skin, but I don't think I can make it out here in LA, man.

I think I crumble. I don't want the thick enough skin, but I don't think I could make it out here in LA, man. I think I'd crumble. I don't want to alarm you, Tim, but if you were to listen back to some of the podcasts, which I certainly wouldn't do, the nature of our relationship has become pretty similar to what you've just described being afraid of. Oh, no. Yeah. You're right. I'm absolutely right. And that kind of makes sense

because we've been putting ourselves through the grown ups two shaped ringer for a year and if you come out of that ringer I don't know what a ringer is it's an expression you're bound

you're actually it's where you dry your clothes in you ring your clothes out but like a slightly more mechanical version of that so if you went through the ringer you'd be fucked I'm learning about colloquialisms.

This is actually turning into something now. Let me ask you a question. Do you feel like that deterioration of our relationship into an abusive one has accelerated while we've been in Los Angeles? Yes. Then I put it to you. Oh.

The theme of Grown Ups 2 as a franchise, thus being the positive transformative power of water, is held up in real life because what are we surrounded by in New Zealand and have not seen tons of in LA? Huge bodies of water. Oh yeah. Ben Sandler's onto something, man.

Water. It keeps you alive. It's 80% of you. Yeah. I feel like we're here, we're pitching 80% of you. Yeah. I feel like we're here, we're pitching on behalf of a water company. We've found out Americans don't drink enough water. That's not true.

You don't swim in enough open bodies of water. Tim, can you please start talking again? I've written down here, Becky is an angel. That's a through line for the movie. So at the start of the film in Grown Ups 1, Keithy and Greg, Adam and Selma's kids. Horndogs. Massive

assholes, also horndogs. Yeah. At a really young age. But Becky, you remember the first thing that Becky does is she drives the car out the back of their mansion because she's trying to help Adam. She wants to, like it's the sweetest thing. Oh god, it was touching.

She's like the loveliest person. So the phone was ringing and everyone in the house was busy. This all happens off camera. So she has picked it up and has a conversation with an adult person and she's very young so it must have been a very cute conversation. And she gets the news that Adam Sandler's childhood kind of

mentor, coach, has passed away and gone to heaven. So she gets in the family car and tries to punch in heaven as a destination on the gps and ends up driving the car into the backyard at a slow speed it is a tearjerker it is but this is the thing is that there's heart to that moment and becky is genuinely like a lovable and wonderful character and in the second movie she's obviously learned how to deal with the parenting style of Adam because he's very aggressive

and she sort of can diffuse those situations. And I feel like it's a miracle that this angelic young girl who has been birthed by two bona fide assholes and is surrounded by two horndog shitbag brothers is just so consistently wonderful and loving. Like, Becky is an angel. Do you want to see

a spin-off for Becky? What do you think becomes of her? I feel like she joins Doctors Without Borders or Volunteer Service Abroad or something and they should make

a movie about that. It would be going in a slightly different direction. I feel like the tone would be a little bit different to Grown Ups 1 and 2 but it's a movie I would like to see.

That was really gentle. Yeah, I know. I hit that bit that you hit in your knee in it. Does anyone know what that's called? I know it's generally a reflex. I meant the specific reflex. Sorry, I'm getting a little punchy.

I've written down Norm Macdonald. Norm Macdonald is just... All but cut completely out of the film. He goes down a water slide. If you didn't know it was Norm Macdonald, it would just be an extra. That's his whole role. Probably one of the best comedic talents in the film

just goes down a water slide and walks out of frame like, you know what, this is not for me. This movie's not going to go well. I'm fucking Norm Macdonald. I would like mainly out of satisfaction for the two of us because this seems like the most self-indulgent episode of the podcast we've had thus far. Why not continue?

I've simply got a subheading here which I've called callbacks. We postulated that Grown Ups 2 might be the greatest comedic film ever made we just didn't have the context of the first film to piece it together, as it turns out that was incorrect but they still do have a lot of

set ups to jokes that are in the second film that we didn't appreciate I don't think you could call them set ups though what they are is essentially those jokes in what you'd loosely describe as finished form that they just revisit in the second film. It's not like a set-up in the

second film, Punch. It's like, here's a half-assed gag. Here it is again. The two films are the same films with different non-plot lines. I'm going to take you through anyway. The light has gone out of your eyes. You look like you don't want to hear this,

but I'm going to give it to you anyway, boy. Much like grown-ups, I'm going to give you this content anyway. That's okay. You're going to sit there and take it. Well, yeah, cool. Ping and pulls and that blue stuff. Hey, can anyone in the crowd confirm, is that shit real?

Because we've really really got it isn't it definitely isn't it doesn't exist. So that was a callback in the second film Shaquille O'Neal goes swimming in Adam Sandler's

pool and does a wheeze and there's a die in the pool which makes all of it go blue so everyone knows he's done a wheeze. In the water park

all the men are pissing in a pool. All the grown ups piss in a pool and none of the kids do. Yeah. Which is weird isn't it?

No that's funny, you see? Oh, of course. That's what humour is. That's the trouble with our perspective, Tim, is that everything we think is weird is actually one of the jokes of the film. Exactly. So we're completely misreading both of them.

Ice cream cones I've written down. Why did I? You tell me. Because Greg crushes an ice cream cone in the first movie and he crushes an ice cream cone in the second movie. That's why you wrote that down. Keep firing them at me. Because Greg crushes an ice cream cone in the first movie and he crushes an ice cream cone in the second movie. That's why you wrote that down. Keep firing them at me. I'm feeling good.

Bunions. Yep. Chris Rock's mother-in-law has bunions. That is, you know, same joke. Both movies. Hit me. Deer. It's spelled D-E-E-R.

Hey, we used a deer in the first movie. Why don't we bring it back, give it a bit of a media roll in the second. Keep going. Water jump. Yep. That was a big one. Look at him. No, man.

That's the guy Montgomery that I know and love. Welcome back, buddy. It's good to see you. No, no, no. Where you been, man? Fucking hiding behind myself. I've lost it.

You've bloody sucked it out of me by building it up. But what happens in the second movie is they're walking to do Suicide 35 off the top rock 35 feet above the water.

My mum did that jump when she was pregnant with me. On the way there they're bullying Kevin James because he's afraid to do it. He never did it as a child but Chris Rock says to him what are you scared of, man?

You're the rope from the tree, triple flip, bird crush guy. In Grown Ups 1, we see that exact stunt. The rope from the tree, triple flip, bird crush.

Yeah. Because like... That's why I just got excited. We went into this in an episode of the podcast. We were like... It took us about 30 watches. We were like, what the fuck is Chris Rock saying? We had to slow it down and re-watch the podcast we were like, it took us about 30 watches as well, we were like what the fuck

is Chris Rock saying we had to slow it down and re-watch it we were like that line is just the fuck are you talking about and it finally makes some sense so does that make that a callback is that qualified did you have that in the book

yeah no it's a callback, it absolutely is and thus concludes the callback subsection surely not um now i'm loathe to get into this because it's dark but i feel like it's not in the spirit of the podcast to hold back on things like this okay okay So I want to acknowledge the fact that in this movie we just saw, Grown Ups 1, some really dark shit comes out that they really gloss over or make light of and then move on swiftly. Yeah. And it's pretty full on. I'm pretty sure I know one of the specific references you're talking about. I've got three at least.

There's one of them. They're talking about the last time they... Obviously, the male grown-ups, they serve as the protagonists for the film because, you know, it's Hollywood. And they're talking about the last time they had sex with their wives. Yeah. And Kevin James is like, last time I had sex uh she was half asleep and then they all sort of like ha ha and then he's like no no actually she was asleep she was fully asleep and then they laugh didn't sit well with me call me a flaming liberal but uh i like my sexual

partners like i like my hot meals fully conscious you Yeah, you do like sentient meals, don't you? You're really big on engaging. I like both of us to know what we're entering into. I'm sorry, but this is the dynamic lasagna. I have to eat you now. No, Tim! But I'm awake, I'm alive, man! You know the rules, lasagna!

They're messing with Higgins when he's passed out drunk on a couch and they're throwing all kinds of weird shit at him and they bring up a child molestation incident that he starts reenacting in his head while half asleep. And I'm there going, hey, Adam Sandler and Kevin James, what you up to? Hey, Tim, you're starting to sound like a real party pooper, man.

Sorry, dude. This movie's meant to be some lighthearted fun. I don't know. I just feel like it's important that we bring this shit up. And what was the third one? I can't remember, actually. That's okay. I'm sure it was in there.

But yeah, I agree. Those are very dark, and they're not clever or funny, obviously. They're just like throwaway comments which are horrible yeah we'll move forward shall we um i want to bring the mood up a little bit um and we're fast running out of self-imposed time limit because this is a pretty dark conversation um and it needs to end at some point. Adam Sandler needs to make a basketball film. He needs to stop jamming basketball references into other existing films.

And he just needs to go, you know what I want to make? I want to make a fucking movie about basketball. And I'll bet it would be a good movie because that dude's got some skills on the court. He obviously loves basketball. He exclusively dresses in clothes which enable him to play basketball at any opportunity if you walk up to adam sandler at any point in the day and say do you want to play basketball he is game ready yeah like even when he goes on talk shonen yeah he's like oh sorry sorry i'm late i've just been playing basketball oh sorry i'm

late i was briefly in a suit, which was essential for a moment, but I had to change into basketball shorts to come here in case a game breaks out. It's insane. I know it's unlikely, Conan, but I'm not running the risk.

I really like basketball. And his skills are really showcased in this first movie. You don't see it at all in the second one. We heard today that during Grown Ups 2 and filming, we had some insider information they just break in between takes movie you don't see it at all in the second one we heard today that uh during grown-ups too and filming we had some insider information they just break in between takes to go and play basketball and it was a really slow moving production because they'd have to get all their makeup

and stuff redone before they went back on camera you're totally on point with this it's a fucking dick move as well because unlike a movie set a lot of people are there doing their one little thing you've got catering you've got your lining people you got your soundies you got your whatever else you got your grips your camera operators everyone's fucking there to do their one thing and then i'm saying was just like oh yeah i'm gonna play some b-ball it's like dude you're fucking up everyone's shit man he's also paying all of those people to be there. What we heard. He's essentially hiring a crowd under the guise of making a film so people can admire how good he is at basketball. It is the most dramatic version of, hey, mum, look at me.

I'll bet I can make this three-pointer. I'm going to make a really awesome comedy career just so that I can pay people to watch me play basketball. I don't think that's right. To the point where, and I can't verify this obviously, but what we had heard in passing is that they had to construct a massive artificial tent over like a city block so that they could shoot nighttime scenes.

Not a city block, just like a large block of land, not a whole city block. Yes. A city block is a big... It is, you're right. You're right. Yeah. But over the top of a big... It is, you're right. You're right. Yeah. But over the top of a mansion

so that they could pretend it's night time to do the night time shoots during the day because Adam Sandler had thrown the schedule so wildly out of whack with his basketball antics. What sort of basketball movie would you like to see from Adam Sandler? Sort of like maybe a Space Jam sequel featuring Kevin Durant or like a...

This is what I want to see now. Yeah, it's a good idea. I'm full of them. Or like, do you want to see a documentary or do you want to see just Adam Sandler engaging with professional basketball players? Do you want fiction, non-fiction? What are you after? I want to see Adam Sandler playing

his natural game. Holy smokes. That is the title of the film. Natural game. Natural game. Natural Game. It's an underdog story of Adam Sandler playing himself, but due to CGI and makeup, at age 16, transferring to an all-African-American part of Chicago where he attends a public high school.

The basketball team there is sensational, and he loves basketball. He lives and breathes it. He's moved from Nebraska where he was the best dude there and it's very much a like big fish little pond into big pond little fish scenario.

And heaps of people give him shit. They call him a honky and he proves himself to the school and a girl. There's a romantic interest. Well, this is the other dual narrative of natural game, right? Oh, yeah. He's also learning.

Holy shit. Yes. That's maybe where he learns the three-step technique, which he then passes on to his children. If you haven't heard the three-step technique, it is firstly, make the girl smile. Secondly. Then comment on how pretty her smile is.

Thirdly. And then insist that she goes out with you that night. Why that night? Because it gives her less time to think about how ugly you are. Fugly. Because you are fugly. That's right. You've just pitched a...

Pretty cohesive film. As close to sense as we've made in the last 50 minutes. You're welcome, Sandler. As close to sense as we've made in the last 50 minutes. You're welcome, Sandler. It would be nice to see him make a movie that he's passionate about again, though, wouldn't it? Oh, absolutely. And I feel like this is the way to do it.

I feel like we're fast running out of time. I would like to say, does anyone in the crowd have anything they would like to shout at us from their position? Where's the knife? Tim, where is the knife? Pad. Yeah. Well,, where is the knife? Pad. Yeah.

Well, Tim's getting the knife. Any questions that you didn't maybe get asked last night or you've been wondering? It seems like in the second movie they invented that. What? Catchphrase. Yeah. Well, Tim Meadows in the first film actually, he has a different catchphrase. He only gets used twice, which is booyah.

And they were obviously like, that's expired. we've got to rewrite it what's catchy what's with it what's one syllable wait i'm saying it what it's bizarre to me some people just applauded you for having a knife that's the beauty of being a knife guy. People appreciate it. Or they're scared of you. What? Or they're scared of you. No, no. Not old Timbo. Not old Timbo and Knifey. No, we're good guys.

We're just a couple of co-hosts of a podcast, you know, doing our thing. I feel like you do a lot of the heavy lifting and the knife is just there as a knife, essentially. As a weapon that you carry with you. That's the beauty of the knife. It's like, you know,

when you're doing a really good job, you're invisible. That's the knife. I don't know the numbers, but I feel like statistically you're more likely to be involved in a knife incident if you carry a knife.

Well, that doesn't sound right. Well, those numbers don't add up. But in answer to your question, thank you for bringing it up because I really would have forgotten that. The knife is here. Thank you. Any other questions?

What gag or theme are you most excited you never have to see again to throw in the bin? There's a lot of them. Well, I know what you're going to say. I can answer your side for you. Okay. Oh, yeah? And then I'll do yours for you. Okay, cute. Well, I know what you're going to say. I can answer your side for you. Okay. Oh, yeah? And then I'll do yours for you.

Okay, cute. Yeah, we are cute. I feel like we're falling back in love. Or we just purge ourselves. We just wash all of this fucking grown-ups to stank off ourselves. We're going to have six days in between where we like each other again,

and then we're going to start watching. And then sex in the city too. Anyway. It's for Guy Montgomery. Guy Alexandra Halifax Montgomery. Did I get the order of the middle names right? You also got the gender of Alexandra right. Oh, I did?

Or didn't? Yeah, no, you did. Why did you bring it up if it's correct? Guy's least favourite part of the movie, the bit he hates every time we see it in Grown Ups 2 is at Becky Fader's ballet recital and there is a sequence at the back wall where some terrible production music

starts kicking in and we see a pan of officers Dante and Flazu played by Shaquille O'Neal and Peter Dante. We see Higgins played by David Spade O'Neal and Peter Dante. We see Higgins played by David Spade. We see Nick Swanson.

We see Chris Rock. And we don't see Kevin James. They're at the back of the dance doing this weird little dance in a dance break. And I can sympathise with you. You're right to bring it up because it's a terrible part of the movie. Tim's right.

That's the part I'd yell at the screen probably the most. It's fucking awful. So what's your least favourite part of the film where you go, fuck off? It's right that's the part I'd yell at the screen probably the most awful I think your least favourite part of the film where you go fuck off it's really close to the start it's in the

Lamonsoff household when Donna comes in she's wearing the boots that she's bedazzled herself yeah and she no no sorry

it's not she might still be wearing the boots it's at the gym I'm sorry but it's Donna based it's at the gym when Bumpdy and Charlotte are like lining up their date and she's on. She might still be wearing the boots at the gym. I'm sorry, but it's Donna base. It's at the gym when Bumpty and Charlotte are lining up their date

and she's on the side. This means nothing to anyone. Yeah, I know, but this is the bit for you, right? Yeah. You hate the exit she has from shot. It's like a half a second's moment and Tim's like, yeah, that's right. Get off the camera.

You can say what I say. He says, waddle off, Donna, that's right. Get off the camera. You can say what I say. He says, waddle off, Donna. He says that. And that, yeah. That's it. Those are our two least favourite moments, respectively. We've probably got time for two more. If that.

If you've got more. I think about Sex and the Big Two. You take the movie that's two and a half hours long. It's going to make hours long. Yeah. Is this going to make a difference in the future? Yeah. Oh, yeah. I think it might.

Yeah. I'd say so. It's funny. The whole Sex and the City 2 thing, we'd known it for a little bit, but it didn't seem real because it was like we hadn't arrived

at that hurdle yet. That was just, it was an idea rather than a reality. And even after last night, the fact that we were going to watch it 52 times didn't seem real. And then when we were watching Grown Ups 1 today, and I wasn't enjoying Grown Ups 1, which I'd been looking forward to for half a year. I was like, oh, we've really gone and done something now, Tim. Yeah.

There was a lot of regret going on then. So, yeah, it's like it is. The time commitment is definitely something to think of as well because when it happens every week, like a 15-minute difference in the movie makes an impact. I believe the delta between Grown Ups 2 and Sex and the City 2 is 40 minutes. Someone did the maths for us. We're going to spend about an extra, I think, 30 hours watching Sex and the City 2 to what we did with Grown Ups 2 and Sex and the City 2 is 40 minutes? Someone did the maths for us. We're going to spend about an extra, I think, 30 hours watching Sex and the City 2

to what we did with Grown Ups 2, which is a lot of time when you say it out loud now. And will continue to be throughout the year. We were talking about this with someone earlier today. There was a possibility that we could have pulled out after last night because that was the expectation that we had sowed. We had arrived at the destination that we had advertised for everyone. We were going to get to the end of Grown Ups 2 and then that was it.

And there was a large part of me going, why don't we just pursue that? There is a lot. I still think that half of both of us, and also we don't usually talk about this on the podcast, but our girlfriends. Why don't you tell everyone when you told your girlfriend what the plan was after we finished watching

Grown Ups 2. Yeah, she didn't see the humour in it, that's for sure. You said... She got very upset and she said, I just don't want Sex and the City 2

to be a part of my life for a year. Which I can sympathise with. And she's right to uh not want that like yeah and the impact is real this is affecting more than just us yeah we're bringing loved ones into this thing and i i feel terrible she could be listening right now you should apologize to her you go zoe sorry zoe zoe baby This is Tim speaking. Zoe, baby, if you're listening, I'm sorry. I can't top that.

I'm going to use that one. Gentlemen, behind the lady who asked that very personal question. This is the last one, and we've got to make it quick because we're about to go over time. Oh, you didn't have a question? Well, that's perfect. No, it's introduced in a second. there was another Kevin James bodily function joke. He's got a dysfunctional penis, presumably prostate problems. He cannot urinate, you know.

He doesn't get a good flow on. With a steady flow. He stops and starts a lot. Which, hey, I'm no doctor, but I think it's like an early warning of bladder cancer, right? Or a gallbladder stone. Prostate cancer. Yeah, yeah. Right. He should get a checkup. But I think it's like an early warning of bladder cancer, right? Or gallbladder stone. Prostate cancer. Yeah, yeah. Right.

He should get a checkup, as all men over 40 should, which is actually why we called this conference in the first place. So come on, folks. Whack a digit up there. Don't be afraid. And also, women, check your breasts. Like, just in general, be aware, be health conscious. And just briefly, I'll say this

I thought the second grown ups was sexist this first one was right you guys saw it awful neither of them are particularly good for society or your mental health take it from us

guys I'd like to say that we're very excited about season 2 and that we want you to join us on our, I'd like to say that we're very excited about Season 2 and that we want you to join us on our journey. I would like to say that, but at this moment in time, it's simply untrue. I would like you to follow our journey, though, because otherwise what is quite meaningless becomes entirely meaningless. Yeah. And I'd also like to take the opportunity once again,

we can't express our thanks enough that you'd even show up and listen to this conversation I'm sorry we came in particularly I speak on behalf of myself

for being so tuckered out it's been a big year it's been a big year for Batten Montgomery and I'm dreading doing it again but you guys do make it all worthwhile

no you don't that's disingenuous. Well. I don't think so. No, you don't. If that was true, I'd be in a way better mood than I am right now. And I would too, Tim. I'm trying to end this thing on a positive note.

We've already gone one minute over, so let's just get out of here. Ladies and gentlemen, please, can you give a big round of applause to Tim Batt? And by round of applause, please thank thank Mr Guy Montgomery for his contribution round of applause for yourselves, thank you so much again for coming out tonight, we'll see you on the internet folks, goodnight applause music

music music music music music Thank you.