The Worst Idea Of All Time - Episode Thirty Three - Intergalactic Gloryhole

Episode Date: October 10, 2015

Guy and Tim are back home. There's no guests. There's no flashy location. There's no live audience. Just two guys, one movie, 32nd watch.Mr Big has a sixteen piece ska band. Guy flips his mattress because of French crumbs and possibly human discharge. A lot of whispering going on. Plus Coffee Guy has started educating children! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It's the worst idea of all time. It's the worst idea of all time. It's the worst idea of all time. Hello and welcome to the worst idea of all time with me, Tim Batt. That is correct. Season 2 you've been keeping under your bed. Tear it up. It's valueless now. There's no, I know there might be value in it. It could be a pretty good doorstop. You might also notice, and of course you have,

because my God, even I can hear it. It's very echoey in this room. We are recording live from a cave off the east coast of the North Island of New Zealand this week. We have hidden out from loved ones and enemies. We are afraid for our very lives. There's a lot going on here. A lot of sea creatures making plans,

making gangs. A lot of enemies. Like alliances, political alliances, getting themselves together. You know what's happened? The sea urchins have struck a deal with the sea snails. It's very funny. It's like watching a marine life version of Survivor, only there are no cameras. So it's very funny it's like watching a marine life version of survivor

only there are no cameras so uh it's not even for the entertainment of the masses oh no the cave is crumbling around us there are rocks falling left right and center how's this going to work this recording operation we've got is very precarious the real situation is we're uh we're back in new zealand we're in Tim's new house. My new flat. And he's bought these sort of arms like they have in the proper podcasting studios. But he done did got them on the cheap. And one of them is just literally falling apart before our very eyes.

I broke it. I broke it so good. But we're not going to let that stop us. You've got so many moving parts over there. Yeah, it's a lot of points of articulation. Anyway. Oh, God. Oh, God.

If you're not familiar with the podcast, it doesn't usually involve us describing the varying different levels of technical difficulties we are running into right out of the gates. It usually involves two men deriding one another in the film that they have watched for the multipleth time of whatever. So we have just watched Sex and the City 2, the 2010 sequel to Sex and the City 1, which in turn was a maybe 2008 sequel to a very popular HBO television show

for the 32nd time. And this has probably been, we've probably had like a 10-day break. We've probably... It's been massive. It's been the longest break we've probably had like a 10 day break, we've probably It's been massive, it's been so good. It's been the longest break we've ever had. Oh it's been nice. Because of you know whatever logistical reasons and I gotta say I was expecting to come back refreshed

recharged and ready to enjoy the film as much as humanly possible given the circumstance. And yet is that what you found? And yet I would compare the experience to being given my freedom in the midst of a prison sentence. Get in there. Get nice and intimate with these new microphones.

I've got new microphones. Do you want me to get even closer? Get in there and just talk real. Give him a bit of Monty. Give him a bit of that Monty magic. What I'm trying to tell you, Tim, is if you... No, but speak quietly. You don't have to shout when you're that close.

Just give him a bit of that old Monty magic. But... That old Monty magic. If I was... Tim, if you were given a prison... Now it feels like we're doing this in secret. Oh, yeah. Okay.

Tim. Yeah? If you were sentenced to 52 years in prison... That's a lot of time. What have I done? And you served triple homicide. You've wigged out completely. Jesus. You're a bad guy.

You're a regular Robert Durst. But you're not because you get put in prison for it. Anyway, 52-year sentence, no parole. But for whatever reason, after 31 years, they say, hey, by the way, after 31 years. Yes. I'm sorry. Yes. Yeah.

Maintain the world. Yeah. You get a year off. Go walk about. Yeah. Enjoy your life, but you still have to come back and serve the remaining, I don't know, what's the maths on that, 21 years. You'd think, first of all, wow, that would be amazing, imagine that. But then, it would dawn on you, as you have to go back to prison,

that that is an even more cruel trick. Would you not agree? So, are there alternatives that you can just do the whole prison term in one hit? Yeah. Or take a year off? Yeah, I think I'd probably rather just take the whole prison term in one hit. Yeah. Or take a year off. Yeah. I think I'd probably rather just take the whole hit.

Yeah. Based on the evidence presented before you today? Yeah. Or just for general vibe? Both. We're easing our way back into talking. Why did we? Why were we even whispering in the first place? Because, you know, we're mixing it up.

Doing anything. We're seeing our're mixing it up. Doing anything. We're sitting on back to the whispering. Doing anything we can. Yeah, so I was expecting to enjoy, not enjoy the movie, that's the wrong word, but at least... Enjoy it more, though. Yeah.

It was super hard right the way through. I gave you some kisses. For a kiss is always a gift. I genuinely was giving you, like, tender kisses. Yeah. One of those kisses, the one I gave you on kisses for a kiss is always a gift i genuinely was giving you like tender kisses yeah one of those kisses the one i gave you on your forehead yes that is literally exactly the same kissing technique i use on my girlfriend what did it feel like uh very warm very tender were you comfortable in that moment yeah i mean i wouldn't want anything more tender than what you gave me, but I think that was probably the line,

and we know where that is now. We've visited it. I think the line is much further along than you think. I think maybe the line is in two different points depending on if you're me looking at it or Guy Montgomery looking at it. In that moment, Tim, such was my boredom and desire to explore the world outside of sex and city too i would have

literally kissed any part of your body and without any real thought for the ramifications that might have to either our relationships to the outside perception of our friendship i was operating outside the sort of the bounds of you know regular thinking you went to a lovely place with it which is kind of tender kisses in my brain i was like i could actually see myself running at the wall full speed head first and just to just to see what would happen would my head break through the weatherboard or would i just get knocked out just moved into this place yeah i know a reckless place for you to go don't tell the landlord I've already put a hole in the wall. Did you know that?

No. In the lounge, we've got an extra bed, and so I just kind of rammed it into the corner, but I didn't realize there's like a spring thing, like a tightening mechanism that pokes out of the mattress, and I just went, boom, and it just punched a starboard. I've been burned by those tightening mechanisms before as well. You're a terror.

Take them out of beds. When have you ever used it? I'm always tightening up and loosening my bed. Really? Yeah, weekly. Really? Yeah, it's a regular bloody lucky dip when you're sleeping over at old Monty's house. Crazy.

Do you flip the mattress on the reg? I do flip the mattress on the reg. You are a psychopath. You are the only person I've ever met who flips the mattress. I flipped my mattress last week. How often do you flip them? Well, do you know why? Because when I got back from LA,

I'd been subletting my bedroom out for two months. I got back, this couple, like a lovely French lady moved in when I first left, but her job repositioned her. And so she wound up having to find some flatmates through Trade Me, which is Craigslist or whatever. This couple moved in when I first left but her job repositioned her and so she wound up having to find some flatmates through Trade Me which is Craigslist or whatever. This couple moved in.

From what I can gather They fucked a lot. The evidence left I don't even know if they were having sex but they were definitely eating a lot. What the fuck?

There were apple cores and almonds littered strewn across my bedroom and beneath the bed. That is fucked up. So your boy G-Mont rolled up his sleeves and gave the place a good one, two, three scrub. And accordingly, when I was in the midst of this cleaning, I was like, you know what?

You know what I'm going to do? Because I had the whole bed pulled away from the wall. Fair enough, man. I can understand in that circumstance flipping the mattress. Yeah, it was probably apple juice and semen runoff all over the top half of the mattress. Which, coming this summer mr big strascoosies apple flavor now yeah uh he's been experimenting a lot with uh sort of essence of like flavor essences there's a vanilla one now yeah it makes your whole house smell like vanilla

like a like a like if someone had set off a vanilla stink bomb in a public changing room that's what it smells like it doesn't doesn't smell like stink bombs, though. It's like... No, but the vanilla. That's the vanilla part. Oh, okay, yeah. The public changing room part is the semen. Got it.

Yeah. No, you're right there. Can you imagine the unholy smell if Mr. Big was to open some sort of gymnasium or emporium of his product? Also, did you see that one of our fans has listed on Craigslist... Oh, yeah. Mr. Big's, like... He's like... Office. I'll pull it up.. Oh, yeah, Mr. Big's office. He's like, I'll pull it up.

It's very funny. While you're doing that, I would like to talk about some things that are in the movie, the first of which, and there's no real reason for me to talk about this, but I notice it every week, and I think I've noticed it from week one, and I've never brought it up,

is Charlotte's insane face, which flashes on screen as a reaction to miranda saying into frenchan and she has got like eyes the size the size of saucers huge and she's just whipping your head back and her neck is essentially on a swivel she looks so crazy it's the craziest anyone looks in the film and it's just on on screen briefly it's when miranda lists herself as being a type a control freak she's explaining yeah and the wind up to the into the french and no way and to function after the function i'm turning this into french no yeah she's i'm staging an indifference and then miranda because she loves a terrible pun slash portmanteau slash it's not really can't be described by any of those words which describe the english language because it's neither it's just a bloody it's a portmanteau it's a car crash

in the literal sense it's a portmanteau yeah charlotte's reaction and interfunction fun no it's not it's not the merging of two words she's just taken one word and slammed it in the middle and she's in the middle of an existing word she slammed it in the merging of two words she's just taken one word and slammed it in the middle and she's of an existing word she slammed it in the middle of another word that her friend is already it's like she saw a pile up on the freeway and instead of slowing down and driving her car around the pile up she sent it in on the middle of it she honed in she accelerated she went crashing in and accordingly charlotte's reaction is one of crazy-eyed terror. What a visual representation of the linguistics of Sex and the City 2. But you said you've noticed that since week one, and you've never brought it up.

Yeah. There's a few things that I just, I don't know, I don't feel comfortable talking about yet. We're only up to 33. You don't feel comfortable talking about. They're going to eke out over time. Why don't you feel comfortable? Surely, this is a safe place. It's important for me to have

a few secrets. Okay? I've got to maintain some of those. No one wants that information out of you. Save for me right now, obviously. You see? I don't feel safe anymore. So that's all of the secrets I'm going to share. Now, did you find that guy? Yes. It's Mr. Big Thing. A listing on Craigslist.

Or Craigslist. Because Americans don't know how to talk. Oh, oh, oh, we come from big country. This is how a human talks. No, a human talks like this. Yeah, do you hear this? This is the Queen's English.

And do you know who started English? The Queen. That's right. The first person to speak. Queen Elizabeth II. A lot of people have rewritten the history books to suggest there was language before the 20th

century. Anyway. They're filthy lies. You can't believe any of them. Wanted. Business ideas. Financial district. Do you have a big idea you want to share with the world? Using my capital and business savvy, we can make your big ideas a reality. Why come to Mr. Big? As a day trader on Wall Street and inventor of the famous Mr. Big's jascoozie trademarked,

I have the business skill and creative talent to turn your idea into an accomplishment. Contact Mr. Big at and then show contact info with the addendum. Do not contact me with unsolicited services or offers. Well, show the contact info. Let's blast it on the potty. Get people to send in some ideas. It was just a screenshot. But not to us.

Oh, yeah. It's just a screenshot. There's no hyperlink. So who sent us this? Was it the guy who made it? Or was it a guy who just... It would be way funnier if it was a guy who stumbled on it. Philip Rozak, who says,

surprisingly, I've received multiple emails pitching business ideas for Mr. Big. Philip, if this is true, could you please fire some of those through to us? Do us a solid, Phil. I mean, while we're poking around the neighborhood, we might as well crack open that huge leather-bound book that our hero Mr. Big does keep on that keyboardless,

mouseless desk of his. Where there should be, what are we, 2010? A probably 2.4 gigahertz core 2 duo on that desk instead there is an ancient leather-bound book gathering dust known simply as mr big's big book of ideas and buried within this are all sorts of crazy schemes and plans to quickly accumulate more fun so he can buy carry more of the things she doesn't want mainly Mainly in crayon, these ideas are displayed. Mainly pictorial form. Also a few in those fancy Faber-Castell colouring pencils.

Yeah, if he's getting real fancy. Anyway, the header on this page. Two words. Intergalactic glory hole. Tim, what does that make you think right out of the gates? Scarband. Okay. I was thinking of like some sort of portal that you dip your dick in.

It's a band name. I mean, if we're getting literal on it, totally. It is some sort of space-time continuum rip. It's like a tear in the fabric of reality that you would insert your genitalia into. And you'd pull back in little aliens, and you'd raise them as children. Do you think that if you were to put your Johnson

through a rip in reality, aliens would be attracted to it? No. Oh, well, maybe maybe do you know what maybe like okay you know how we see comets and crazy like ball lightning and shit imagine if that's an alien's penis visiting us and we're like that is beautiful and on their home planet they're all like as ashamed of it as we are like a comet or an asteroid is i don't know some sort of intergalactic phenomena that we see is actually an alien penis.

And we're like, oh, it's so beautiful. It looks like a sunset or like the sky's on fire. It's an alien's cock and or balls. That would be funny. But if we're taking just the term intergalactic glory hole, I'm seeing a 16-piece scar band touring from east to west coast, like constantly, fish style. 16 members.

Yeah. What have you got in there? You've got three saxophones, obviously. Well, we've got to name them. So you've got a tenor sax, an alto sax, and a soprano sax. We have to name the saxophones or the players? The instruments. Well, you can name the players if you wish.

Okay. Okay, on tenor. Warren Tenarius. On alto. Michaela Shackleyball. if you wish. Okay. On Tina. Warren Tanarius. On Alto. Michaela Shackleyball. On Soprano. Thanks. Mikhail Velitov.

On Piccolo. Simone Samangi. On The Triangle. Don Terrius. Mouthpiece. On Beat Drums. Warwick Fishbone. Dontarius Mouthpiece Onbeat drums Warwick Fishbone

Bongos That's an obvious one Barry the banjo playing bongist Which leads me nicely to banjo Well Borry the Bongo Hating

Mole rat Lead guitar Well, Bori the bongo-hating mole rat. Lead guitar. Scott Warrenson. Rhythm guitar. Bernard Blacksmith. Bass guitar. Tyrone Wishbone. You like Tyrone, do you? Yeah, he's a real classic dude tyrone wishbone the bass player from mr big's 16 piece scar band intergalactic glory hole um well obviously the five instruments you need

left are synth yep synthesizer is electric metal piece fucking hell I'm running out it's hard to come up with names though honky tonk piano Ronald Keystone um actually because I know we've only got I think two slots

left what else do you need in a ska band I don't know what instruments oh trumpet oh my god trumpet b-flat trumpet uh oh peter sickling trombone dears matai who actually funnily enough is my old pe teacher from intermediate school is it the same guy yeah it's absolutely the same guy and he's reinvented himself rounding everything, who's the singer of this glorious band? Mr. Big. Of course.

Who else? Of course it is. What we didn't specify is that they play exclusively Kinks covers. That's right, the Kinks are the popular British band found by the Davies Brothers, I think, in the 60s. Because what we have also found in the movie, or I've found, I think you have too, is that... I've stumbled into it after you opened the door ajar for me.

Is that they've pretty much buried all of the lyrics to the King song all day and all of the night across the film. So they've stretched out what was probably a jaunty three-minute catch-as-all hell track into a two-hour and 30-minute... You know the song. ...floated jam session. It's the one that goes...

All of the day. All day. And all of the night. It's the one that goes all of the day all day and all of the night it's that one and i'm pretty sure this is totally the kind of project that we should embark on but we definitely won't because we can't be bothered but piecing together the lyrics across the entire film you could definitely cut it up and cut it to that song you gotta question the financial merit of touring with a 16-piece ska band called intergalactic glory Hole who specialize in King's covers I've got to say you're hitting a pretty big niche 16 band members travel expenses are through the roof okay if you look at a graph right x and y we've got a gradient in there there's a y intercept what you've got to analyze is how much more audience touring revenue is going to be brought in by the fact that Mr Big's got a 16-piece band versus if it was

just like a normal quad, right? So you've got to measure that across the expenses, and I think 16 piece is the perfect equilibrium for maximum profits. And he's done the crayon math on this. There's a lot of drawings in that page about what the perfect number for the scar band is. I just think 16's too many. Every band member will have to take it upon themselves to sell how big are the arenas these guys are playing they play theaters or arenas arenas like wall to wall huge i'm talking 16 18 000 people turn out 16 to 18 000 people 100 but turning up to see intergalactic glory hole yeah 100 because not since like the days of chicago and boston and america and other bands that hubrisly named themselves after massive awesome places have we seen a fabulous touring act that just just really knocks it out of the park in an arena setting you think the only bands

to have done this previously were bands named after geographical places? Exclusively, 100%. And exclusively in the 70s. No one since has really been able to do it. We know that. It's how the Rolling Stones are still able to tour. No one's really topped it until now with Intergalactic Glory Hole.

I've got to say, I do wish them all the best, but I think you're managing a lot of personalities you're managing a lot of ego with a 16 piece yeah 16 piece and tyrone fishbone has a propensity to fuck band members too yeah he's a real wild card he likes getting involved like fleetwood mac level getting involved he's had sex with everyone and now it's just a complicated series of ex-relationships. Very uncool. Tyrone, reign it in. That's right.

Mr. Big also dispenses Fleetwood Mac and Cheese. He, of course, bought this at a Fleetwood Mac concert in 1967 and he's held on to it. He takes one mouthful every year on the anniversary of the gig. There's pretty much four mouthfuls left and he tours it as sort of a memoriam for the band. So he's selling it as a, but when you say he's selling Fleetwood Mac and Cheese, he bought macaroni cheese at a Fleetwood Mac gig and then he puts on a performance where he eats a tiny bit annually.

Yeah, and they didn't call it Fleetwood Mac and Cheese. That's what he called it. That is genius. That's like Credence Clearwater, oh wait, what do they call themselves? Because they can't call themselves Revival. Credence Clearwater Oh wait what do they call themselves Because they can't call themselves Revival Credence Clearwater Survival Something like that

And it's just the living members who want to play music with each other It's the other two who don't have Fogarty's rights Like for those songs or whatever Something I can't remember how it goes They dress up like Foghorn Leghorn We are deep in a rabbit hole of confusion right now A lot of music A lot of music going on

a lot of jazz a lot always a give. A kiss is always a give. What's he doing? Is that what I think it is? It was, by the way. I'm really glad you got that. Yeah, me too. I've missed a couple Nickelodeon themes in the past that you've chucked out there. I'll be damned if you burn me again.

I'm glad I got this property. I'm going to start moving outside the realm of Nick one day. Nick, Nick, Nick, Nick. Nickelodeon. Nick, Nick, Nick, Nick, Nick, Nick. Nickelodeon. Nick, Nick, Nick, Nick, Nick, Nick, Nick, Nick, Nick, Nick, Nick, Nick, Nick, Nick, Nick, Nickelodeon. So, the question, as always, what is that crazy Java-addicted fool doing with his time? Ladies and gentlemen, it gives me great pleasure to tell you that that guy has started an inner

city school program where he's training kids how to be baristas. That's right he was in the cafe and he was like i can't get enough of this high quality espresso coffee he calls it expresso specifically to antagonize the assholes who walk around creating everyone it's just let people call it what they want all right it's just coffee it has no impact on your life you pedantic motherfuckers you just skipped three beats and like mocked yourself without taking the first step. Because I know you wanted to correct me on saying expresso, but then you railed on yourself preemptively.

I love it. None of that was to do with me. It was all to do with other people. Listen, coffee guy is an educator at his heart. He's an addict. There's no doubt about that. But he's also primarily a man who wants to teach the world to love. And the way that you do that is teaching kids how to make a damn fine cup of joe.

So here's how it works. Similar to the college draft system with the football, you have to maintain a certain grade point average to get accepted into the special scholarship program where Coffee Guy himself will grace you with his presence on a daily basis and teach you how to make the perfect cup of coffee. We are talking where do the best beans come from, how to prepare them,

making sure that the entire supply chain is pristine and clean, keeping those things in the best condition possible. But then we get down to the milk. What songs do you sing a cow to get the best kind of milk out of it? Those songs are jazz songs. And you will only find that out if you go to Coffee Guys, Exclusive School of the Arts, and Espresso. He teaches the kids how to manipulate their vocal cords

to perfectly recreate the alto saxophone played by Stan Getz on the smash jazz album Getz Gilberto. All right? He's got these kids soothing cows every which way across the Midwest to the tones of Corcovoda I did not know you could do that did you know you could do that until right now I've never done whatever it was before um so really that's that's what's happening with that. I'm fully into it.

I think good on the guy for using some of that demon-born energy to try and create something positive for once. Obviously, he's going to spread more love in the world. First of all, you've got kids from all kinds of different backgrounds who suddenly, you know, kids love responsibility. They love purpose. Secondly, you've got all manner of parents or just grown adults walking around

suddenly feeling much better about the coffee they're buying. It's okay to pay $4 for a flat white when it comes from a smiling five-year-old with scalding hot burns all over their hands because guess what? You shouldn't get kids to make coffee. But if you are going to, they should go to Coffee Guys School of the Arts and Espresso.

And if you don't know, now you know. My shining light this week is pretty specific, but there's a lovely lot of music in this here ep of the party. It's a little piano roll that happens as Carrie is grappling with the fact that she is just Pashtun right on the mouth, and for some reason that eclipses everyone else's problems, including possible extradition or jail time for Samantha. I could not count on the fingers and toes I have the number of times I wanted to tell Carrie

to stop talking about herself in this film, which means it was at least 21. Can you only count to 21? Well, I said on my fingers and toes. Oh, right. Wait, how many? Have you got a spare one? No, no, no.

You mean 20? Like up to 20? I said I couldn't count on them, which means that there's more than 20. Oh, okay. So there's at least 21. I've got, just so everyone's on the same page, I've got the normal amount of fingers and toes.

Very good. Not that it's not normal to have that amount. I just have 20. That piece of piano music is coupled with a lovely shot of Carrie walking midnight in the hotel towards the balcony. Yeah. Flowing dress, blowing in the wind gently. It was,

the music tonally sort of, it did really do, it does, as we've said before, the music does a lot of the heavy lifting in this film. I would say almost all of it. All of the emotional impact of this film, and there isn't heaps,

or much at all, but whatever there is, there is because of soundtrack. Which is crazy to imagine the experience on set, where they don't have the benefit of the music to set the tone so everything would have just felt so flat and like wide yeah and just and just you would question everything you'd be like this doesn't feel like it's anything yeah it'd be terrifying it'd be such a like risky situation to be in anyhow but no it wouldn't actually if this was an original property you'd feel like that but you'd be like you know what we've got 10 years of bad catalog or whatever 15 10 years of goodwill to piss on here yeah it's

a lot of goodwill my shining light was triggered at a very similar moment uh and it's very of the time i thoroughly enjoyed it when mr big's phone is ringing all the way from Abu Dhabi as Carrie is about to confess to her sins, it flashes upon the BlackBerry screen, Carrie, sell. It just dates the movie so much. Like, I have no one. No one in my phone right now is listed next to the word cell.

The assumption is, well, first of all, well, the assumption is that it is a cell phone. And secondly, there's no need to differentiate between what number it's coming from or who you're calling. I think cell phones back in the day from memory, they weren't that good at, you know. Storing two numbers under one contact. Exactly. So you'd have to have

two different contacts although he's on a blackberry i feel like we had gotten there by that stage you know yeah it's you're right it's very odd and it's also odd that that's your shining light because i feel like it's a bit of a negative i feel like you're negging finding something you don't like to say that you do like it I did enjoy it You liked it Don't you come over here Policing my shining light

Shining your police torch On my On my moment Don't you Get so Prissy When I'm kicking the tyres On your shining light

I'm testing it out You know I'm walking around that thing I'm poking it Don't you I'm turning the window wipers on I'm seeing if the uh indicators are going forget about me just quickly there's one other thing i'd like to open up tim that you are brought to my attention which is a moment i really like these moments that uh in which the there's a certain moment in the film which qualifies a crazy sort of logic.

And in the film this week, it was when the girls go, they're going for lunch, and they're going camels, then lunch. And Carrie bemoans this because nothing in her life is good enough. And she says, I'm not really dressed for camels. And Miranda says, I bought a whole outfit change or whatever. And don't worry, Abdul picked them out. And you pointed out to me. Whereupon we see the girls, like after they put on these outfits, and they are hideous, outrageous.

I would say goofy. They are the goofy of, in a film loaded with goofy outfits across the board, this is quite comfortably the goofiest they look. I get being fashion forward and avant-garde and shit, but this is just... But it always means it's going to look silly with hindsight. But, so we've got... Samantha is an Egyptian pharaoh.

I think we've been through this before. Amanda, Miranda rather, looks like some psychedelic cowboy. Yeah. Carrie has got nipple tassels. Some sort of deranged stripper who's wound up in the desert. And Charlotte is rocking kind of like the psychedelic cowboy's sidekick. Sort of. Who was always with Quick Draw McGraw?

Oh, I can't remember. Quick Draw McGraw's sidekick kind of outfit. Yeah. So what that means, though, is that... Abdul did pick out the outfits. Abdul's fucking with them. Abdul is going, I wonder if they'll put these on. I'll bet they will, these stupid American scumbags.

And then he's just watching them parade around like a bunch of fucking muppets in the desert he's been given the company credit card and he's seeing just what he can get away with it's so good too because you can they'll it'll get back to him right and the hotel staff will be like abdul what are you doing this is not on he'll be like hey listen i'm not a fashion guy i'm a man servant i was told to do this I was way out of my pay grade yeah this was out of my leg out of my debt someone threw a credit card at me and I

went for it he knows what he's doing he absolutely knows what he's up to he is exacting his revenge on this fucking horrible woman who have just descended onto him it's so good it's the best kind of revenge because it's like the perfect crime.

You'll never get caught. And accordingly, Abdul is a beacon of hope as we look to move forward with this stupid goddamn project. Abdul, you remember, is the man who also, I had a theory for a while,

was an assassin because when Dickbot arrives on the scene, he's sharpening a knife. A butter knife. He's polishing a butter knife. And it's like, I think what they're trying to insinuate with the film is like a penis reference, right? It's supposed to be innuendo for like, you know.

Ah, because they cast gay aspersions upon. Exactly. Well, they don't cast gay aspersions. They do. They don't cast gay aspersions. They do. Samantha says, I think my butler's gay. It's not like a. What is an aspersion? I think it's like when you insinuate something.

It's like when you don't come out wholeheartedly. To cast an aspersion sounds like a spell. No, actually, yeah, you're right. Because when you cast, I think it's just when you say something negative about people. So yeah, you can't cast a gay aspersion because or they are because the context is yeah it's not negative it's just speculative it sort of is in this film though which is weird because they like they kind of try to champion the gay cause and get so caught up in being so rainbow flag waving that it's like all right this is like a crossover weird and it's like we're all good

here you guys need to stop screaming gay waiting every six seconds it's coming across really the opposite of i think what you intended not cool anyhow on that note i think it's a fantastic time for us to put a pin in the enterprise this week i think you might be right we've got lives to lead as i'm sure do you. Thank you very much for listening. If you've enjoyed it, we don't often ask for this, please rate and review the podcast on iTunes or Stitcher, whatever the platform you listen to it on.

It is a huge help to us. Yeah, and do yourself a favor. Make it a haiku review if you do review us. That's five syllables seven syllables five syllables so it would be a joy if we could get the intergalactic glory hole hashtag popping off this week uh tell us any band members and it's so long i think it is a hell of a hashtag what was it tyrone fishbone right he's our bass player that is correct oh damn it he's i like i've got a picture of what he looks like in my head. I had it immediately when you

started talking about him. And he looks a lot like Lenny Kravitz. Just so you know. Draw it. Otherwise, this is Guy Montgomery telling you to eat more oranges. It's the worst idea of all time. It's the worst idea of

all time. It's the worst idea of all time Season 2