The Worst Idea Of All Time - Episode Twenty Five - Box Office Gold

Episode Date: December 7, 2016

SPONSORED BY AUDIBLETimbo is a guest of this episode of Guybo's poddy - The Worst Idea of All Time. Ole Monty ain't happy because his co-host is now ONE WATCH AHEAD in his WE ARE YOUR FRIENDS viewing. The boiz are talking The Sandler Approach to film-making and the biggest thing missing from WAYF - Efron's erect noodle. Some great character play coming out again from Flash himself and a take on the best bit about young kids from the Battman.Trailer: Boners of The Heart Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This is a Little Empire podcast. Visit us at littleempirepodcast.com and on Instagram at littleempirepodcasts. Are you going to play that dastardly intro again? Try, try, try, try, try, try, try. Ow! This movie's still fine. There's a colleague, a pastor. One of them dies, that guy's a screw. One of them's a hottie, his name is Jay.

One of them looks like Johnny Depp, and his name is Johnny Depp. Classic Maximum Joseph. I agree. Ah! You forget that films are supposed to have a point. Hello, and welcome along to the worst idea of all time, episode 25. My name is Guy Montgomery. I'm joined by a very special guest, Tim Batt.

Hey, Tim. Hello, Guy. Good to be here. Thanks for having me on. It's honestly my pleasure. So if you guys don't know, there's a podcast I host every week where I watch and review the same movie. I do it with Tim.

Always. Yeah. Almost always. Yeah. Up until today, Tim would always do it with me. And then on account of a bet that you foolishly lost. Yeah. In hindsight, do you think that was where the mistake happened,

to lose the bet? No. No. So after he lost a bet, which i think would be fair to say at the time you found regrettable no one likes losing a bet no one likes losing a bet when the stakes are so high secretly had a side bet with higher stakes in which you'd bet on the other person winning the bet that you were a part of which i think is called spot fixing or match fixing and is illegal in professional sports anyway you lost the bet you watched the movie by yourself yes ruminated on it yeah well i didn't

ruminate i just hit that record button and put my thoughts onto a microphone that wasn't even part of the deal but i just didn't want the watch to go to waste yeah that was my main thing i respect that i was surprised but also uh after you'd laid it out it made perfect sense of course you haven't listened to it you haven't heard it i will never listen to it you don't know what's on that much i can promise you um ruminating just quickly as a sidebar yeah is to so you didn't ruminate you just put your thoughts out there correct to ruminate would that be to suggest that you reflected and then shared thoughts Yeah

I think to ruminate onto something is to dwell on it and kind of swash it around your head a bit To think on it You just came out Yeah, nice That's a great way of doing it It is what it is It's the way we've always done it That's right

It's the way we've done it from episode one, season one Whereas if you hadn't have done that, you would have accidentally ruminated on it. Yeah, and that would spoil the broth. How do you feel about it?

About what exactly? The film, that episode, this podcast. That episode. Or about whatever's what you're by yourself.

Here's what I think about it uh i think that you're saying you're better than me yeah i am i am that is where i was going with this you've really cut to the heart of the matter and the heart of the matter is i'm better than you this is what i was afraid of yeah i know and that's what made it worth it in a lot of ways And that's what made it worth it in a lot of ways. You are like an evil mastermind right now. I'm playing 4D chess with a monkey. Guess who the monkey is?

It's Guy Montgomery. When I talk to you about it, obviously there'll be a part of me which is like, Tim's got the rub on me. He's seen this movie once more. He knows more about it. I now feel like I have to deflect all my opinions to you i feel like you have an understanding of the depth and subtext of the film which i don't have access to at the same time i'm in no way committed to getting on your level yeah yeah where i will actually you know do anything to doesn't that just speak volumes

about how much you don't want to see the film at this point? That it perturbs you so much, your competitive spirit has really been wronged and feels like it needs to do something to rectify the situation. But that visceral hatred has been superseded by your want to not see the movie any more than is absolutely necessary. I think the other thing contributing to it is when you were watching that movie, you literally were like, because I knew we were recording the podcast tonight, and I was like, can we do it at this time?

And you said, nah, we need to do it a little bit later. I need to watch the movie beforehand. And I had forgotten that that was something I had to do. So I laughed hysterically to myself. Right. And then filled that time with a game of softball, which also brought out my competitive spirit. And we were really in the driver's seat. Social soft softball i haven't played social sports for a long time

namely because uh i'm hyper competitive and like uh struggle with the social balancing act right tolerating uh you know not noobs like it's that's the beauty of social sports but just like having to bury my desire to win against the fact that we're all doing this to have a good time. Right. And losing that, I think, if I'd won, I would have had a different attitude where I would have felt fine.

Can I ask you something? Yeah. Did someone really let the team down? I dropped a catch at one point. Oh, did you? I played a great game. I don't know the details suffice it to say i got play of the match actually on our team well done i was a ring in good stuff

uh but i did drop a catch but no the team was so comically poised to win it was the seventh innings and uh we were winning by one run we had two outs so literally all we need to do is get one person out uh they didn't have anyone on the bases, and the game is ours. And through a series of comical errors and just missteps by our team, they scored multiple runs in very quick succession on the back of errors from us rather than brilliance from them. And we lost. And it was upsetting, but also fine.

But then to come here and then have you also in some other weird mental jujitsu or judo way have beaten me. Well, listen, I just think you need to adjust your perspective on this. It's interesting that you've interpreted it as I am somehow ahead of you. I mean, there is a very easy reckoning of the situation to suggest that I am behind you. You know that you are the winner. Undoubtedly, but because of the way my brain has framed things

and the fact that we're talking about it now, I'm so deep inside the thought I can't reverse engineer my way back to triumph. Are you going to watch it? No, never. Okay. But just know

that as it stands in this moment, I view you as a superior and will accordingly deflect to you for advice or feedback throughout the duration of the podcast. Just in terms of, I won't come in with hard opinions that I regard as certainties. You're playing on a different, like playing,

you're on a different playing field for me. Only just? For as long as this podcast lasts. Okay. After that, it's back to... And then in your head, we're back to normal. Yeah. Why does your brain not correctly reconcile the fact

that I will perpetually be one ahead of you until you watch it one solo time? I don't think it would be correct for my brain to maintain this feeling of inferiority moving forward. Right. Those are two different things, aren't they? No, to me... You don't have to be inferior just because I've watched one more than you.

Just quickly, while with regards to the movie and all trivia and theories contained therein, I will deflect you as superior. I think the verb you're looking for is defer. I'll do both. Okay. Ironically, if you did defer to me, you would trust what I'm throwing out there. If anyone comes in here asking,

demanding answers to questions I can't answer, I will deflect those questions to you. Okay, very good. They'll get pointed at you and you blast them off at a 45 degree angle. But outside of the context of the movie We Are Your Friends, intellectually, I still regard us as equals. they'll get pointed at you and you blast them off at a 45 degree angle but outside of the context of the movie we are your friends intellectually I still regard us as equals

very good that's very sweet of you well yeah you're probably a little bit I guess we have different applications of our smartness I think you might be a little bit you know a little bit more about me across a wider spectrum of things

yeah but that's not really intelligence if anything you're wasting your time exactly in the same way yeah that uh that inch wide wait no wrong way around uh inch deep mile wide knowledge is is really good for pub quizzes and nothing else i know yeah your classic you know fuck all about everything i know very little, your classic, you know, fuck all about everything. I know very little about anything though. Well, you know a lot about We Are Your Friends. You've seen it 25 times.

I would say I know probably the second most in the world. No, I don't think that. Here's the weird thing. I didn't think this about Grown Ups 2, but I think there's people,

editors, people who worked on the film who've seen it more than we have now. And I don't think anyone saw grown-ups to 25 times even in the editing suite i feel like they got delivered their dailies which was exactly it was like two takes of everything and no bonus scenes it was just exactly what needed to be there there's a famous director who did that i can't remember who it was but he famously kind of undershot and stanley kubrick was it kubrick he would shoot uh the exact only the exact amount of footage so that they couldn't fuck with his edit yeah grown-ups too i don't think that they

were exercising the same like you know yeah they were i feel like that was just like they just turned in everything and that was the extent of their interest or investment yeah it's it's kind of it's the same different means to the same end what no in some ways it's the same uh methodology to a very different end so when you have a masterpiece by virtue of your own restriction on your creativity and the uh discipline that you have to apply to yourself and and on the other um you really want to play basketball so fuck shooting that afternoon and all your friends are around yeah oh and to be honest two options the second one sounds way better doesn't it do you want to

concentrate really hard on a hard thing or do you want to i don't know just play basketball with hall of fame basketball player shaquille o'neal and your friends and before you answer you will make a hundred million dollars either way it doesn't matter what you pick you're gonna make a hundred million dollars yeah you want to make a hundred million dollars from struggling against yourself arguably the most difficult challenge of all or or do you want to make $100 million for having as much fun as possible? Yeah, when you put it like that.

It's easy to see how there are more Sandlers than Kubricks in the world. Isn't that just? Where do you think that we are, your friends, fits on that spectrum? From Stanley Kubrick to Adam Sandler, where is Maximum Joseph? Maximum Joseph is present-day Sandler against Kubrick's oeuvre. Yeah.

Yeah, he definitely skews Kubrick just because... Sort of another axis, isn't there, that we need for this group? And this comes back to the central point of difference with Where Are Your Friends to either Sex and City 2 or Grown Ups 2 is that those films were flashy and very lazy and careless and cynical, I think it would be fair to say. Like, you know, Adam Sandler and his friends had a lot of fun making their money, but it's's like to your fan base it's a pretty um it's not a very considerate way of going about the movie

making process uh whereas this is like different in that it's it doesn't display any of those things it's just an earnest attempt at filmmaking which hasn't come off perfectly and accordingly that would that would mean maximum joseph is uh more along the lines of having um max like creating a maximum level art project rather than having maximum level fun with his mates so thus more kubrick probably like on the scale of Kubrick to Sandler, he's, I don't know, Sandler being zero, Kubrick being 100, he's 60. And, okay, so what we need is another axis. So it's like that's our X axis, right? Yeah.

We need a Y axis, which I feel like is, Steven Spielberg is at one end of the spectrum and Tommy Wiseau is at the other. Oh, nice. Nice, dude. Great job. You've really got a lot of room to place people in areas now. Yeah.

So within that 2D space, we've got, if you think of, this is a lot to mentally mind map if you're out for a run or just listening to this podcast casually i want you to stop doing that i want you to listen hard and figure this out in your head how this map looks this graph i want you to visually put this in your mind's eye. Along the x-axis, Maximum Joseph is 0, Stanley Kubrick is 100. Upon the y-axis,

that is the vertical line on a graph, Tommy Wiseau is 0, and 100 is Steven Spielberg. Now, Maximum Joseph is positioned at 75 on the X. Yeah? And 30% on the Y.

So, 70% towards Kubrick. On the right, yep. And only 30% up. Towards Spielberg. You got it. But that means does he still skew more Spielberg than Wiseau? No, he skews more Wiseau than Spielberg. He's only at 30%.

If he was at over 50%, he'd be more towards Steven Spielberg. Yeah, yeah. 70% Wiseau. Sorry? Yeah, yes, correct. Yes, you got it. Yeah, dude. Yeah, absolutely. he'd be more towards oh yeah yeah so he's yeah yeah 70 was so sorry so yeah yes correct yes yeah yeah dude yeah 70 wise oh which is yeah which is what makes it interesting because it's earnest but it's um misguided occasionally where i think they made a huge misstep and we talked about this today tim is uh if they could have got a full boner Zac Efron scene yeah I think things would have come out very different yeah once you have an acclaimed star of whatever realm which Zac Efron clearly is massive star celebrated star once he gets his erect penis out, that is an art film.

You can't deny the authenticity of it. You cannot deny its art. The beauty of it, it's almost irony, is that the nickname for Zac Efron's erect penis is Box Office Gold. So it is only through using Box Office gold that you can access maximum art and it's this this is and this is why it would have just been such a fantastic layout of the movie it really would have it would first of all bums on seats second of all people are watching the hell out of that movie yeah they are combing every detail yeah i mean if you got Zac Efron to get his boner out once,

who knows how many secret frames you've buried or references to the boner you've got throughout the rest of the film. Yeah, you go and fight club on it. You just put them in there. Yeah. I mean, I don't know if that's... That's the film you would make? I'm just thinking that's the film this week

in reaction to what I've seen. That's the thing that might have been a difference maker. A difference maker. It's like the decision maker, but an external pressure on them. The decision maker. The decision maker. The president. I think George W. Bush called himself that.

Yeah, the decider. Yeah. But he said it in a real weird, funny way. I can't remember what it was. The chief decider, I think he called himself. That's great. It's a great peep show joke where Jeremy, Jez, Robert Webb's character, keeps talking about calling up the ombudsman.

Like the looming threat of this higher intellectual plane that could decide things oh hey tim yo um what what about the movie this week did you on the second viewing uh the viewing we just shared what what jumped out at you did anything grab you not i'm not looking for a shining light i'm just looking for stray observations. Just Paige is a really good actor. Or the actor playing Paige, rather. It's tricky. Once you notice that,

all that can happen when he's on screen, really, is it just solidifies your opinion of his acting. When you separate the actor from the character, you lose the possibility of the character. You know, like when those watches happen, it's very difficult to imagine Page doing anything because he's just so pleased for the guy playing Page. They're like, fuck, you are turning it in, son.

So he's almost a victim of too good of acting. Yeah. Well, I had heard that um uh from someone who makes television that if there's a scene that's so good or a shot that's so good that it really stands out you're gonna get rid of it because you can't have something that's kind of outshining the rest of the product and i feel like maybe page is that thing that should have been cut out of the movie entirely because he's kind of showing up the rest of the picture that's wild hey it's so counterintuitive yeah this is too good well look

i don't know if it's true yeah it's what i i get told a lot of things you know i got told rabbits are just big calm rats who doesn't make it true some kid i was a kid too at the time yeah i mean if you're still different animals yeah you need only look at them you're still going to the completely different species well of information traded as a child as an adult though you've got to accept partial responsibility for that adults say a lot of crazy shit too that's. And it's more cynical because adults say stuff which isn't true, but it's not as obvious. It's in subtle ways what's being said isn't true. It's nuanced.

Yeah. Tricky more than anything. If you're going to lie, at least make it entertaining. So when it's found out you're lying, the person's like, well, to your credit, that is so outloundish outloundish this means he says something outlandish out loud yeah which is what usually happens with big bold-faced lies yeah that's so outloundish they are almost i almost respect you for it that is

the best thing about hanging out with kids though the brazen fallacies that you're faced with a six-year-old announcing to you in no uncertain terms there indeed is a dragon in the bathroom which is why i will not go there it's it's so good i often think i try and uh apply elements of that childlike sort of flexibility with hard fact to my life as an adult that only now as i say this out loud does it occur to me that might be perceived as problematic that you're tapping into your childlike nature why that i'm just problematic that i'm just because uh the adult reading of that is i'm just lying to people oh i see i see so in your head you're doing something funny and whimsical and in their

head you're just why is this Why is this almost 30 year old Just making shit up To me, to my face Yeah, or if they don't How do you feel about being described as an almost 30 year old guy It was a label I just threw at you Like some sort of

Cartoon bomb It's the name of my forthcoming romcom Almost 30 Prom promises to be a very unique and original production sounds terrible uh oh damn it i lost my train of thought well then it's probably a good point to break for a short moment as we talk about our sponsor who i won't reveal but it's the same as last time oh well you're gonna have to do a deep dive into the uh pits of the worst idea of all time to figure out who is providing us money to uh to shill for their their wares that sentence doesn't work thank you very much to audible.com

for sponsoring this episode of the worst idea of all time but what is audible.com I hear you ask why it's only a premium online outlet for on demand audio products what kind of stuff I won't lie to you predominantly

audio books yeah they mostly do audio books but they also do podcasts. They have some original content. I'm going to look up right now to see if anyone's read the Bible on there. You know, they call it the good book. No doubt. Okay, in a land of fantasy, Tim, who would you like to narrate the Bible to you? Who's the guy who played Gandalf?

Sir Ian McKellen. Is he still alive? Yeah, he's very alive That's so good to hear He's a hell of a guy For me, I would probably like to hear Steve Coogan deliberate as Alan Partridge Such is my fandom For that character

Okay, so we've got the King James Version of the Holy Bible The complete old and new testament and do you know who got to read it someone called david cochran heath he's got to be a big player in the audiobook game to be able to read the bible do you think you need to be a christian to read the bible no not necessarily i just think you have to have a compelling voice that's what audible looks for they are blind religion, as all good democracies should be. All they see is the person's talents. And boy, is this guy good. If you sign up to audible.com right now, that's Audible, A-U-D-I-B-L-E,

you will get a 30-day trial, including a download of a free audiobook. That is audible.com forward slash try now. Audible spelled A-U-D-I-B-L-E. Can you imagine being given something free? Well, you needn't if you visit audible.com forward slash try now, because your imagination will become reality. And we're back on the worst idea of all time. Hello, caller.

Hi, just calling up from Te Awamutu. Yeah, really interested in what you guys are saying about Paige and his acting. Yeah. I've done a bit of acting myself, actually. Have you really? Yeah, I'm a big part of the community theatre down here. I've done a bit of acting myself, actually. Have you really? Yeah, I'm a big part of the community theatre down here. I see. And I'm just calling up to see if you think Paige would have... I actually submitted a videotape to the director, Max Joseph.

I see. Do you think Paige would have gained or lost anything if played by a New Zealand actor? Thank you, Corley. We've had to let let you go but i will answer the question in your absence where you can't respond to it uh a lot would have been lost in this film if the piercing disgusting new zealand accent was recorded on film alongside this cast of a galaxy of stars crisp american voices is all i want to hear if you give me the nasally flat vowed nonsense of the antipodes i will spit in your face thank you for calling um oh he's still there I haven't pushed the button correctly. That's embarrassing for me.

That is... Yeah. Really good feedback. I've actually... I've actually been... Working... On my... I've actually been working on my American accent and seeing as I'm still on the line

was wondering if I could do a monologue for you I would love to hear it this is the character of Paige from We Are Your Friends and my life it um this is the character of page from we are your friends in my life i do not believe in anything that is not concrete all this digitized computerized bullshit that you cannot listen to the banks. You cannot listen to the stock market, but real estate, gold, your fucking diamond,

well, that's going to last you a lifetime. So, do you honestly think if you'd broadcast that in the movie yeah all that stuff you said yeah i'm still here well first i guess how was that look it was terrible i didn't like the delivery i didn't like the choices you made i didn't like the small flourishes of improvisation that you had clearly put on top of an already bad script wasn't aware it could be made worse and yet here we all are so once i i don't i thought i knew where the hang up button was apparently i don't it would just make my day if you could figure out how to hang up on yourself and end this call i would rather listen to the flat piercing tone of a disengaged telephone line than a single syllable more than you've already spoken from your

voice well there it is my receiver's broken so i can't actually end phone calls you're telling me that on my end right here next to the audio desk i can't find the button to hang up on you and you are technologically incapable of hanging up on me and thus we are trapped here for as, well, I guess as long as one of us lasts for. Is that what you're telling me? Yeah, well, I'm not exactly any happier about it than you are. All right, well, look, while you're here, I mean, you're here anyway,

tell us a story about your childhood. Where'd you grow up? Are you born in Te Aramu or did you move to Te Ara Mutu or what? I moved there. Yep. How old were you when you moved there? Oh, two. Two years old? Yeah.

Whereabouts were you born? Oh, look, it's hard to say, really. When I say I moved there, I mean I sort of woke up there. Sorry, I'll stop you there. When you say it's hard to say say is that because your voice is so terrible that even you can't listen to it i grew up in a small town without any vowels in its name oh i see just a lot of consonants physically very hard to like how the welsh do it but without the welsh language yeah with new ze. What was the first letter? In what?

In the small town that doesn't have any vowels where you were born. An X. An X was the first letter. That's incredible. What was the second letter? X. Another X. Wow.

I don't think I've ever seen two Xs just smashed together like that, you know? A lot of people hadn't. No. Groundbreaking. It's a huge part of the reason. What was the third letter? K. An X and an X and a K. And then what were we dealing with for that fourth one? J-T-R. Really? In that

order? Wow. Blows the mind. Will you ever crack at it oh look i daren't i don't know how to approach it i have no idea how to approach it do you pronounce it as a z or or an x like x-ray or or like xerox you know it's just really really wouldn't even know how to navigate the approach on that one but look you've watched We Are Your Friends no

you've never seen it I just auditioned how did it come out here's the funny thing about it I've actually watched it twice today and I was expecting my co-host on this show who's regularly here guy montgomery to do a bit of the heavy lifting around the segments uh bearing in

mind that i just recorded an episode completely by myself but i guess that's uh not able to happen where's guy i don't know he is left uh he's not present that's all i know he's not he's not in the room as they say in show business hmm yeah that is tricky isn't it did you make that really super clear to him up front what's that that i'd done an episode just that you were going to be relying on him to do a lot of heavy lifting I didn't think I needed to verbalise that I thought we were at a point in our relationship Sounds to me like that's where There was an opportunity for confusion to creep in Right, lack of communication in your mind

Is what's happened there Yeah Well let me tell you what my shining light was What's that? So what I hadn't noticed before is the sheer What's a shining light? Oh I beg your pardon We do a show where we watch and review the

same i know the show okay so just don't know the segments the shining light is where we try to find something we genuinely enjoyed in that particular week's watch of the film does that make sense yeah yeah because there's a lot of stuff we don't enjoy, you see, because we've watched the film so many times before. And none of the three films we've been watching are very good films. Three films? Yeah, we're on to our third one. We do one a year. Yeah.

So my shining light this week is the sheer amount of Skrull stickers there are. I didn't fully appreciate on the first couple dozen watches but they're on Zuccoli's headphones which I'd seen before but they're also located on his keyboard there's a real message of Skrull about this film it's foreshadowing it's supposed to warn you to pay attention to screw i feel like it's some sort of message that we can all take home that you know we take people in our life for granted and sometimes there are elusive and sometimes not so elusive clues that we should be paying more attention to them well that isn't just about the most beautiful thing I've heard today. And I got married today.

Did you? Yeah. What are you doing ringing up whatever this is on your wedding day? Well, let's just say the honeymoon's not going very well. Yeah, it doesn't sound like it. No. Where did you go to honeymoon? Well, we went to the motel.

In Te Awamutu? No. Ngāruwahia? No. The place that starts with X and then is followed by another X? My hometown. Yeah. No.

Okay. Do you just want to tell me whereabouts it is that you've gone for your honeymoon? I thought you'd never ask. Oh, sorry. I should have. Should have led with that. Yeah. Yeah. So whereabouts are you? Palmerston North. Palmerston North. The Manawatu. Bright lights. Big city. Anyway, by some strange turn of events, who should be in the foyer

is my wife and I check in. But the actor who plays the character Paige from the movie We Are Your Friends. And the man who beat you for the role. The man who beat me for the role. How did that make you feel? Pretty small. Yeah. Pretty small.

Suffice it to say, he came up, congratulated us. We were still in, I was in my suit and she was in her dress. Very nice. She said, thank you very much. You look familiar. Have I seen you somewhere? And he said, I was in a reasonably popular movie called Where Are Your Friends? And The Accountant, arguably off the back of it as well.

That was a big picture. He didn't get into the particulars of it. People forget about The Accountant. Big picture. Ben Aff the accountant. Big Pitcher. Ben Affleck. Big Pitcher. I've never really cared for Ben Affleck. Sorry, you were saying?

I digress. There you are. Wife by your side, confronted with your rival. I don't know if you can hear it, but pretty much... Well, they're doing something next door. I don't know what it is. Oh, I see. I see what's happened here.

Okay. Yeah. So here we are. So this is what happened today as well. Is this going on right now? Is that where you left? Certainly what it sounds like! Okay.

Unbelievable in many ways. But I applaud your courage for sharing your story with us and i appreciate you joining us and my only hope for you and i mean this from the bottom of my heart is you find a way to disconnect the phone call because i don't want to talk to you anymore or ever again after this. And I really mean that. I really mean that. The day I've had, that's a real kick in the guts. I can't express that in strong enough terms. I couldn't put it out loud too loudly.

Okay. Okay, that's perfect yeah all right so uh have you ever seen we are your friends you've never watched it you've heard a lot about it you've never seen it no if you had to guess at a favorite part based on what you've seen, what do you think you would guess your shining light would be? Probably the part where one of the characters dies because that's what I feel like doing. Yep, Squirrel is his name. Yeah.

Do you feel like you want to die? Bang! Oh, no. sounds like he killed himself sorry Tim I was just getting getting just out getting coffees for the boys guys back in the room and that cartoon character that doesn't exist anymore it's almost all the context but I'm glad you killed them off. They sounded like a real drag. Guy, what's your shining light for this week's watch of the film? Zac Efron successfully has sex with Somali, which is problematic in that it's a betrayal of his good friend James Reed,

but also a triumph for him in the sense that it's pretty obvious to all involved that that is something Ziccoli wants to do yes and Somaly obviously wants this as well she's a little bit more conflicted with it because she lives with James. Ziccoli's sort of more engaging

with it at a distance. It's like I really like this person. I'm glad that this happened and they're getting they're in the car on the way home from las vegas yeah and uh jarhead as is want is uh grading whoever it is that zicoli had sex with pretty much being like look for you to ditch all of us while we're in the middle of truly dealing a huge amount of drugs, like at great risk, but also financial benefit to us as a group. For you to just bail on us halfway through for the entire night to have sex with anyone,

this person better be, you know, unreasonably attractive. I like that description. Unreasonably attractive. Yeah, like it's an affront to your senses. It's like, okay. Well, at this point, it doesn't even make any fucking sense.

Exactly. What are you doing with yourself? At some point, you've gone too far. Let's get you a terrible haircut. And yeah. And what happens is he says this and he's like, you know, and then he accuses Zac Efron,

or Zicoli, sorry, beyond that. He's like, I know that face. That's the in love girl face. And Zicolies Zac Efron, or Zicole, sorry, beyond that. He's like, I know that face. That's the In Love Girl face. And Zicole, in this moment, is like, what are you talking about? He does this sort of high-pitched, playful, like, what are you talking about? Like, I'm enjoying the attention I'm getting. Yeah, but also, you know, just plays it perfectly. And I liked the line.

I liked that I hadn't noticed it 24 times prior. I just generally thought it was a good moment of the movie, which is what a shining light has to be. Getting sentimental with James Reid. James Reid. With James Reid. What a guy. What a feeling.

James Reid from The Feelers. What a guy. What a feeling. James Reid from The Feelers. Bestows a gift upon his loyal subject. So the gentleman doth think. Ziccoli. The parameters of the gift are it is contained within a box de mac book, as the French would say.

It is sentimental. It is self-serving what could it be i'm so glad you asked a very very small flax bush fully formed bonsai the logic of course you've thrown the word bonsai at the end and it's thrown me what does that mean as I understand it because I thought a bonsai tree was a specific thing is a bonsai the style

the trimming that is exactly the question I'd hoped you'd ask a bonsai tree as I understand it that is a That is exactly the question I'd hoped you'd ask. A bonsai tree, as I understand it, that is a tree that has had its roots constantly clipped to maintain its miniature stature. That is awful. Yeah.

Yeah. If you think trees have feelings. I actually read a very compelling column recently indicating that they did. Written by a tree because they've been peddling this propaganda for years. And frankly, the more stuff you read by trees, the more exhausting it becomes. Well, that doesn't make it wrong, though. We've been reading on trees for so long. I feel like I should hear from trees also.

Yeah. I'm talking about books baby you kind of sound like a tree right now you're kind of using the language of a tree yeah this is the way they frame their situation yeah and it's fair i don't know the exact mechanics of how you create like of of what a bonsai tree is. All I know is that these very small trees, which grow, you know, to the shape of a full-grown version of itself. Now, I don't even know if, are flax bushes around the rest of the world, or is that quite a New Zealand thing? I'd say they're reasonably common.

The flax bush, flax is quite a practical thing. You can use it to... But does it grow everywhere is my question. I don't know if people are familiar with flax. That's why I'm familiarizing them with flax. Flax is a coarse, long leaf on it. Is what it is. Yeah.

Like a cabbage tree. Like the. Like a cabbage tree? Like the leaves on a cabbage tree? Similar. They're sort of, you know, they're... Kind of like a big blade of grass. If you think of what a blade of grass is, increase the size by about 15 and increase the hardness by 10.

And the waterproofness... By 100. Yeah. Hey, and if you're listening in your grass I'm not calling you not waterproof I'm just saying

you are 1% the waterproof of flags is more waterproof so I'm pretty certain that there's no such thing as bonsai flags but

somehow James Reid has spent a lot of time creating a very small fully developed... Now, before we go on, are we confident it's bonsai and not bonsai? It's spelled with an S.

How you pronounce it is a user's choice. I'm sure that there is a language expert somewhere, you know, hooting at me while rubbing their finger, a la the folks in Shelbyville when they see a performance about springfield that's your choice what i'm trying to tell you tim is he's made he's spent a lot of his time and energy building this tiny flex bush fully developed but very small he gives it to the zac ef. It's a self-serving gift. First of all, the logic is if I give this to Zac as a colleague to maintain

this gift, they're very time-consuming. Pretty much that means that the opportunity he has to whisk Somaly away from me and cultivate a relationship is diminished. Gotcha, gotcha. Second of all, I'm going to tell him that if he can make me a purse,

just a small purse, I can get my cards and cash and some coins in, maybe a key, he's going to open for me at Summerfest. That's a lot of Cs. Yeah. He's pretty much just creating a huge distraction. He doesn't know that Ziccolle and Somaly have had sex yet, but he's sensed a vibe and he's reacting against it. So he's using his professional status as leverage

against something that he knows Zicole wants but has to work towards. The thing he tells him he has to do to work towards it is very time-consuming, limiting his ability to focus on Somaly and have them fall in love with one another right he's inserting all of the work and time that a bonsai tree will demand of him and it's going to suck up his ability to work on the track or work on somally

yeah and moreover the thing with you know giving him a full a full bonsai that they're not made to then be hacked up and turned into a smaller version of a regular thing so he's expecting zikoli to build a relationship to this living organism that he will then have to betray by turning into this purse and so i mean that's a whole emotional rubik's cube that zikoli will have to solve meaning that the amount of time and energy has to spend on his human you know his face- his face-to-face relationships, not just with Somaly, but with his boys, with Jarhead, Johnny Depp, Squirrel. Yeah.

Everything's going to be difficult. This is like when they tell kids who grow up on a farm not to name the lambs, isn't it? Similar sort of thing. Yeah, but he's expressly being like, he's not telling him to name the lamb, but he's watching him name the lamb while knowing that he has to kill the lamb. It's very manipulative parenting or mentoring. It's brutal.

Well, that about does it for me. I can't imagine there's too much more to say about anything. You're probably right tim unless you've got any cause for uh worry concern or highlighting a potential moment where you feel the actors went off script yeah there's one moment i don't know that you could credit the actors with doing it but it's the early nightclub scene. This is no but, by the way, for those of you keeping score at home. Nightclub scene, social, five hundo, bro. Where's my five hundo, bro? You got it.

You know where we're at. Listener, you probably don't. That's cool, too. But there's a scene where they give a shot of the dance floor to be like, hey, guess where it's popping off? The dance floor is social. And one of the woman who is dancing has on her shoulder a full handbag. Like, not a clutch.

Your face. That was venom with which you spat that word out. Maybe I've missed this or just never noticed it but to me it was pandemonium i was like there's no way that was an order from on high that you do that you wandered on the set either thinking you were at a genuine nightclub because you've been on the hammer for so long or you were like i need to stand out this is my last roll of the dice as a professional actor what is going to distinguish me from the other club going extras in this scene no one's carrying handbags on set that's my shit and somehow got it past the editors past the directors but it still made it into the movie

and it was a bold call a lot of yes ending of oneself how big is oneself. How big is it? The handbag. Is it a large one? Oh, it's deep. It's like, it's, um... Yeah, it's certainly, it's borderline overnight handbag. It's not an overnight bag, but it's at the larger end of the handbag. That's a fucking smart play, though, isn't it? Go to the club with an overnight bag. Imagine if a dude tried to pull that off.

It'd be quite obvious, because I think a guy's overnight bag is you can really see it. Yeah, it'd be a backpack. No, you'd get a little kind of bathroom bag and stuff a shirt in there and some underwear and socks. You'll wear it exclusively. I mean, toothbrush.

Microfiber clothing. I don't think you need anything. I think if people start wearing only microfiber clothing there'll be a lot less showers a lot less time spent washing clothes just a lot of uh dry dryness quick polished polished bodies and on that wonderful vision of the potential future i'm ready to stop talking about We Are Your Friends after the second time of watching it today. You've been doing it a lot lately. Kiti Anoa.

Thank you so much for being with us. Thank you for listening. We will continue to do this for another, I'd say, 26 weeks? 27 weeks. We're almost at the halfway point now. Yeah, man. And if you really want to get in on the fun, join the Facebook page, facebook.com slash worst idea of all time.

Yeah, use the hashtag TWIOAT when discussing it on your social media channels. And we never say this, but rate and review us on iTunes. How dare you. Because we literally have no idea what that does. Yeah. It is unfamiliar terrain. But people always say it, don't they?

You listen to podcasts and they go, rate and review us on iTunes. And Guy and I, they're going, I wonder what the potential benefits of that are. I wonder what the outcome is. We don't know. Yeah. I wonder what the potential benefits of that are. I wonder what the outcome is. I wonder if you get... We don't know. Yeah. Could be like the stonecutters. Do you think we'd get admitted into a secret club?

I just think that we'd find out about more tunnels. Oh, yeah. Like shortcuts. But then also bigger tunnels, which aren't necessarily shortcuts. They're just real curious things. Thanks for listening, everybody. This is Tim Batt saying goodnight. This is Guy Montgomery saying if you know any secret tunnels,

please tell me. Ow! This movie's still fine. There's a colleague who passed a... One of them dies, that guy's a squirrel. One of them's a hottie, his name is Jay. One of them looks like Johnny Depp And his name is Johnny Depp

Classic Maximum Joseph You forget that films are supposed to have a point Thanks for listening to this podcast If you're thirsty for another, why not try Boners of the Heart Boners of the Heart Mate, that's literally that's literally the basis of magic. So you're not, you know, like magic is only.

But it's not magic. I'm seeing how he's doing it in front of my eyes. So, okay. So a magician, would you be shocked by a magician? Would I be what? Would you be impressed by a magician? I'm constantly impressed by a magician. Okay.

But there's not a bit of me that doesn't think I could learn to do that. But I feel the same way about surgeons. I'm impressed by the fact that they've acquired the skill, that they've put the time towards it. But I was like, probably in another universe, I am a fucking neurosurgeon. Oh, my God. This speaks so much to who you are.