The Worst Idea Of All Time - Episode Two: Wholegrain, B!tch

Episode Date: December 27, 2018

Tim faces a grand choice - does he destroy his morning or his marriage with Sex and The City viewings? The boys wonder why SaTC2 was made at all, Guy recounts the time he picked up a pretty scary hitchhiker while Timbo downs his brekkie. WHERE IS COFFEE GUY?! Why is string so important to helping crack a conspiracy theory? Who cares, because ultimately we need to congratulate to Jonathon Filey and Dana Robin. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We just have a good rhythm together, you know, he sort of feels me out, I feel him out, and we go for it. Hello, and welcome along to the Worst Idea of All Time, Episode 2. Tim Batt and myself have just finished our second screening of Sex and the City, the movie. Tim, he's currently incapacitated on account of uh having a piece of toast what bloody hour is it in your corner of the world my friend it's toast o'clock mate isn't it always though we're dealing with breakfast hours yeah i'll tell you what's happened let me finish my mouthful before i do because i tell you what boy if there's one thing i don't want in my ear holes it's someone chewing i think i've got that what's it called like myos myosopia or something

i actually when i hear people chewing i'm like no no guy yeah you love it you secretly love it it's kind of the opposite thing actually you are a deeply closeted asmr freak i can feel my fist ball up when i hear people chewing in my ear you hate the thing you crave huh i hate listening you hate the thing you crave look here's what's happened um went to a couple of movies in the new zealand international film festival yesterday back to back with my beloved wife came home uh it was And went to a couple of movies in the New Zealand International Film Festival yesterday, back to back with my beloved wife. Came home. It was pretty late.

And I had to wait for her to fall asleep before I started Sex and the City. Because truth be told, she's not as excited as you and I are about the voyage beginning once again. So, waiting for her to drift off. We're dealing with sort of midnight now uh two and a half hour movie i was like you know what i'll do i'll just i'll see if i can get maybe like an hour in before i get up crack off to finish the bugger off knock the bastard off as one of our heroes sir edmund tillery said of his nemesis mount everest which had wronged him in the past most famous nemesis so i um i watched for a little bit and i think i got 10 minutes or maybe 15 and then i think i fell asleep for 10 minutes

and then i kind of came to and stopped the phone playing the movie and then um watched the rest of the movie in the morning but i missed the bit where steve admitted to um having sex with someone else i just felt bad for him the whole film that yeah i see because you you didn't understand what all of the bloody consternation was about that is um that you you made it deeper than 10 minutes mean, here is a man who has learned nothing. I know circumstance dictates how and when you get to watch. But as recently as the last episode, I remember you bemoaning the fact that you'd done this late night watch and it had sort of created an immediate rift between you and the film. And here you are toiling away at 12 12 a.m but before we dig into

that god no hold on what do you want from me man it's a two and a half hour film gotta figure out some sort of methodology here i'm not gonna i i physically can't wake up at 6 a.m to watch sex in the city too it's unconscionable i know it's tough it is it's upsetting uh it does as it stands with the uh you know east coast to new zealand time difference uh i do get to watch it in the middle of the day or you know there or thereabouts whereas it is i mean your two options neither of which are appealing you can either sully a wonderful date night with your beautiful wife Zoe. Not happening. By this being the last thing that touches you on the way to sleep. Or you can sort of destroy the prospective day on your hands by getting up at Sparrow's Fart and engaging in some sex in the city. I understand that you're in a tight spot.

And I actually respect, you know, the knock an hour off by night get up knock an hour and a half off in the morning approach i think it's uh it's not unreasonable doing all this dilly dallying around uh i mean did you feel any better or worse about the movie after the second screening i just kept thinking of your opinions and attitudes toward the first viewing and i i got a lot more out of the movie. I liked it a lot more than I did the first watch, I think. You're right, there's a lot of threads going on, you know? A lot of action, a lot of storyline,

a lot of plot that we're dealing with and unpacking. Absolutely. And I came away at the end just thinking, dear God, whose bright idea was it to make a sequel to this? We've got a bow on it. We're all good. I also did. Confusingly, although at the end of this screening,

I sort of wanted almost, not to suffer through the entirety of it, but just to revisit the key plot points of Sex and the City 2 to just watch how they put the piece, what they papered over in between the eras and how they put it together. Because there are a few little threats, like Stanford and Antony.

I mean, I don't know what's happening between them, between this film and the next, but in this film they share a very tepid New Year's Eve kiss just out of convenience. They're the only two pieces of tolerable company at some god-awful party. But by the time we kick off at the second movie, I mean, as well you know, Tim, they're having a big gay wedding.

A big gay wedding. The real centrepiece of the whole film. You can't have a Sex and the City movie without a big old wedding. I guess this is true. Or, you know, a trip abroad. Can I just quickly delve... before we go for the plot, can I just quickly delve into... Is your point there that you wanted to see

a little more Stanford and Anthony? You thought we could take a little bit more in there? Not necessarily, but there's that. There was the sort of... The ever mine, ever thine, ever ours, the Ludwig van Beethoven quote quote i remember that resurfaces in the second film just these little you know drips and drabs which i feel exist independent of the television series uh that you know is the the connecting the connective tissue between

sex in the cities one and two samantha's fabulous humping dog that's right i figured what's one more little bitch at the big gay wedding like all these you know these little details um i mean that that's all by the by it's it's sort of just it left me i know i don't want to watch that movie again but it did leave me curious uh about you know just specifics like i'd love this's impossible. The only way I can really get the information I want is to do the research myself, but I just bullheadedly refuse. Before we talk too much about the plot, Tim, I want to talk about the plot of your life.

You said that Zoe was maybe not as enthused by the prospect of digging through another year of the worst idea. Can you please tell me how the conversation went? I won't drag a transcript into the podcast for all and sundry to hear but she cares about me she loves me and she's she's worried about me she saw what what happened with the last season of sex in the city too and apart from anything else it's uh you know it's no small time suck especially because we are uh making some attempt to contract the duration

in which we record 52 episodes of this this one um below a year so uh hey look in terms of all the things that get thrown into marriage i'd say this one's this one's fine this is dandy don't you worry about old timbo i i just you know i do worry for me mate She cares about me Not like you Put me through this Get me up at Sparrows Sparrows fart To watch fucking Sex in the City

I think I feel You know We worry about you differently So you know There's a fairness in saying They're not identical But I worry for you too

I worry You know The idea of this Tanking your Beautiful union Of course it's going to send a shiver down my spine If your marriage can't sustain 52 watches of sex

in the city, then you know that's no kind of life I want to build for myself The ultimate test It's like they say, what do they say? Play Monopoly with your partner before you marry them because it brings out the worst in people. Unless they just tune out. Some people, they just don't want to sort of participate.

And I respect that. It's like Monopoly. It's not real. I'm just going to down a smoothie while I'm here. Oh, man. You're on a real health kick. What sort of toast did you have for Brekkie? Whole grain, bitch.

Good on you. Any toppings or just a dry bit of warm bread? Just butter, mate. I'm a simple man of simple wants. Shit, you are a simple man. What's in your smoothie? We've got raspberries this time because they were on special at the supermarket.

A little bit of natural yogurt and a banana. And then just a little bit of milk so it's liquidy enough. It's not bad eating. Yeah, yeah, it's a much more glamorous smoothie than the toast you were offering. Look, the first thing I thought when I watched this movie, Tim, was everything feels different and not in a good way.

That is to say, while I did actually wind up not enjoying the film uh i was immediately on edge all the familiar feelings of uh why we stopped doing this in the first instance came back to me in a in a real heap uh but there was nothing for it i thought you know mind over matter um i actually learned mind over matter the most effective teaching of mind over matter i had was from a hitchhiker i once picked up i was driving with a guy named matt proctor uh it was just the two of us or maybe it was with james robbins it's not important either way we were driving between christchurch and dunedin and uh to whittle away the time we picked up a guy who was a pretty scary guy,

actually, as it turned out. He had, very visibly, he had a smiley face sort of burned into his arm, and he just kept saying, mind over matter, I don't mind, it don't matter. And he was talking about the fact, I was like, wow, man, it looks like you really hurt your arm to get that smiley face on it. And I don't know that's actually how I absorbed the lesson, but it's certainly the first thing I think of when I think mind over matter. I think, you know, I mean, by all means, pick up Hitchhikers.

You're going to meet some interesting characters, but also be safe out there, everyone. Yeah, that sounds like that man wasn't of sound mind when he got that particular marking on his body though that is uh coming from two gentlemen currently discussing who have uh arnold schwarzenegger's son emblazoned on their rear ends so you know that's different let he without sin cast the first stone it is not up for us to debate the permanent markings of other people's bodies. It's true. But I sort of, I mentally readjusted and wound up having what could be described as an okay time.

Well, it's a real fall from grace for Guy Montgomery coming up the track. He started strong, very enthused about the movie, lost a lot of steam in the second lap. Yeah, it's just, it is long, isn't it? Two and a half hours is long. There's no getting around that fact. And it doesn't just make the movie watching experience somewhat arduous. It also makes it quite a logistical, you know, ordeal trying to fit it into your day i'm living proof i'm very bleary-eyed at the moment you're right you're making it work now one of the things i sort of

used to occupy my pathetic little mind while i was watching the film tim is i uh was fondly reminiscing on the presence of coffee guy in the last film. I remember he existed. I remember we dug into the actor Tom Stratford's back catalogue to discover that he actually had a small role, the specifics of which I couldn't recall, in Sex and the City, the first film. Were you looking out? And so I was looking out for him. I put my little fingers to work and dug into the IMDb.

He is on the imdb page underneath the cast list he is listed as elaine's friend and then uh in parentheses he's uncredited so you know you're gonna have to it's gonna be an eagle-eyed watcher who's gonna get you know he's gonna win the race to coffee guy but i thought well you know, by way of a clue or to help me help lead the case, I thought, who is Elaine? Yeah. So I searched for the word Elaine amongst the cast list. And lo and behold, there is no Elaine featured in the cast list for this movie. Wow.

How is it possible for a character to be listed as Elaine's friend when they don't even deem elaine you know the the prime the primary defining factor for for the secondary character is that they know elaine and yet elaine is somehow absent from the credits this is some skull and bones bullshit. I mean, what have you stumbled across here, man? I don't know.

First of all, I was, you know, I can't find hide nor hair of coffee guy, but secondly, what sort of scrub job are we looking at where the entire presence of Elaine and sex in the city has been erased. They're burning their books. This is what Orwell predicted in 1984.

This is Aldous Huxley's brave new world. Guy, you know that I've often, seasons gone by, wanted to drill into the Hollywood accounting practices of these films. I suspect Elaine is some sort of tax dodge, like a shell company cast member, if you will. I reckon if we look through the payroll of this film, we're going to see a lot of background actors getting, look, I don't know how much you get to be on a feature film,

$4,000, $5,000? Sounds like a ballpark, something around there. And then we're going to come to Elaine. You know what? It's quite sure which scene she's in. And the cast member playing Elaine will be receiving the princely sum of $80 million. It's a total tax dodge. They're siphoning off funds.

Elaine is an acronym. And what does it stand for? Alleviating. Lovely. Emoluments. Now. A. Yeah, didn't quite stick the landing on the acronym.

I haven't quite pulled all the pieces together yet guy but I feel like this is what's happened it just doesn't make any sense you can't have Elaine's friend without Elaine that's right I mean what have you got then you've got a stranger certainly if it is a tax dodge it might go some ways to explaining why

on earth this man is consuming such an unholy amount of caffeine he's anxious. He's nervous. He's on the run. He's looking over his shoulder. He's not a comfortable guy. Coffee.

Also, for reference. When you're on the lam, get it in you. You really didn't stick the landing on the acronym, but I like the theory and I like where your head's at. Ample room for exploration. I just find it so weird. And then I started thinking, well, did Tom write his own?

I mean, because who's going to dig into it this much? You know, like it's just tidier on the curriculum vitae, on your resume, if it says sex in the city one and two. It's kind of punishing or humiliating if you're only associated with the second, which was both a critical and, no, it was probably not a commercial failure.

So I'm starting to ask questions about Tom's motivation. Well, this is fabulous stuff. Season one of The Worst Idea of All Time. Guy Montgomery and Tim Batt watch The Worst Idea, watch our grown-ups too, 52 times, to try and drill into the acting performance of Patrick Schwarzenegger and then launch the brand nationally and internationally of blaze pizza a fantastic franchise season two sees the boys jumping back into the well this time

for sex in the city too to try and figure out once and for all what that guy in the back is up to where's he going he's drinking far too much coffee for his own good season three i mean look what happens when you piss into the wind i guess was the answer for that one and in this fourth season an investigation continues is coffee guy in this film only we have the ability to figure this out now. We've got a great opportunity here. It's true. I mean, the prospect of searching for him far and wide is both exciting and overwhelming to me.

It's no small amount of work we've carved out for ourselves. I did pause the movie at one point because I thought, well, where's he going to show up? Presumably a restaurant or a cafe. Anywhere he's got immediate and efficient access to a large amount of caffeine. When Carrie tells her friends that she's engaged to Big and Charlotte gets overwhelmingly excited and sort of makes a screaming sort of noise and the entire restaurant grinds to a halt,

I was combing through the background of frame high and low, far and wide but I could not see the man I did find some seriously entertaining pieces of extra acting and took a very good screenshot that I will send to you special mention must go to a man who is not coffee guy but looks like he's either been stood up by or is waiting for coffee guy in the far right corner of the restaurant he is um upset would be one word you could use to describe him uh

while everyone else is plastered on a huge smile to express enthusiasm for carrie's engagement to the man she's been dating for 10 years this guy is going through the motions in a big way cool i look forward to seeing him in my next watch yeah yeah absolutely i've got i mean i've got him frozen in perpetuity right here i'm just looking him in the eyes right now he's scared of something man i don't know what he's running from what do you think is going on there guy take? Take a stab in the dark. Your guess is probably better than most people's. Well, the idea of going out for a meal by yourself can be quite a relaxing prospect.

I myself enjoy it thoroughly. But that doesn't guarantee that every time you do it, you're going to have the relaxing or reflective time that you might have hoped for. Occasionally, your mind can take you down cul-de-sacs that you don't care to walk down. And it looks to me like this guy's meal alone has gone from a moment of joy to, I don't know,

like maybe the news of the engagement has triggered memories of why he's eating alone and he's sort of remembering the wrongs he's committed that have prevented him from accessing true love in his long life. That's so sad. Yeah. Maybe he knows something that Charlotte York doesn't.

Maybe he knows Mr. Big and is aware that this is a guy who has a shady relationship with marriage. And, you know, he can't express, you know, unadulterated enthusiasm for Carrie because he knows things might not end as well as they'd hope. Who's to say? Maybe he is the brother of big second wife oh yeah that sounds likely second wife out of three is has got to be or second spouse out of three has got to be a pretty unpleasant place in the mantle to occupy a like first you don't know marriages don't don't work out you know shit happens you marry someone doesn't doesn't turn out to be right you know that happens you get married again doesn't work out it's like oh man got it and then your person goes to the third and then you're the second it It's like, this is the worst.

You weren't their first love. You went to third. In my head, for some reason, you said love the third person for the rest of your life, irrespective of what happens inside of the relationship. Three strikes and you're out, as they say. But that's second spot, man. I wouldn't want it. But you don't know it, do you?

You don't know it going in. You're talking about with hindsight, obviously. Because any time that someone's going into a marriage, and this is for a man who's not been married before, I'm talking, of course, to a newlywed still basking in the afterglow of his blessed union, you've probably got a pretty strong feeling that this is a relationship you'd like to commit to. Well, unless you're Elaine, in which case there are certain financial structures

that the state of New York can grant you once you are in a legally recognised relationship vis-à-vis a marriage. I see. So, Elaine, the acronym is also represented by some sort of physical entity. Guy, there's a lot going on in it. We're really just poking around the sides at the moment.

It's going to take a while to really figure this thing out. A lot of bits of paper, a lot of Blu-Tack, a lot of string. There's a lot of details to put together. I don't know why conspiracy theorists seem to think that string is such a vital component in getting to the bottom of a case. It is absolutely essential. It always stresses me out.

You can't have a good theory without string, eh? And things have got to be on a wall. I do get that. It's good to have something visually out there you kind of get stuff out of your head you put it in a physical space to represent what's going on so you can really take a good look at it take a step back and say when was the last time i had a shower right let's tend to that and then you get back there and you get your ball of yarn and you go okay this goes to this thing and this to this. I reckon that's where string theory comes from.

You're aware of it, you know, from physicists? Yeah, I don't know about string theory. What is it? They, oh, no one, no one understands it. I say that because I don't understand it. It's got to do with the theory when you get to the quantum level about how stuff actually sort of operates

and what the whole fabric of the universe is made of. Yeah. I think it's similar to like, what is it? Is light a wave or a particle, you know? It's both. I don't know. We're operating well outside my mental jurisdiction right now. Both you and I.

How'd you do in science in high school guy were you good at it uh no tim science was comfortably one of my worst subjects i was all right at biology physics i actually wrote a letter to the teacher mr harwood on the exam paper saying i did not remember uh being taught uh some of these materials in class and with hindsight i see how mr harwood read that as a criticism of his teaching it was meant to be sort of a self-reflective piece of criticism towards my attitude towards learning chemistry suffice it to say i was called into the deputy head master's office for insubordination and had to do something called a saturday night detention where i reset exactly the same exam

at 6 p.m in one of the boarding houses. You'll be pleased to hear I studied quite hard for that, and I scored 37% on literally the same test. Guy, well done you. I'll tell you what, mate. You didn't quite double your score, but you got about half as much again on top of it's pretty good well i know you've seen improvement cumulatively yeah we're talking about uh what like a 62 exam result here of course they didn't say that 62 62 doesn't come

out of yeah yeah but then apparently according to the mathematicians at the school you got to add the the hundreds together as well so it's not 62 out of 100 as i pled uh it's not important look i'm in new york god knows where mr harwood is did i even tell you about the letter i wrote to a uh an exam marker on the on the uh on the exam paper you did did not. I got, I was bored. It was classic, you know, little shits during 15-year-old Timbo. But the new system had come in. They changed how they assess high school students in New Zealand.

New system had come in. No one quite knew what was going on. We were still shaking it down and trying to beat it in a bit. They gave me an exam paper. I think it was for um what subject was it for i can't even remember and it had a bit the first page said this page has intentionally been left blank and is to be used for your working it will not be assessed but then here comes tim

bet on the on the front of the paper it said um had a whole bunch of rules and one of the rules was you may not communicate with your marker. So I wrote a letter to the marker on that page because I wanted to see what rule would win. I think I failed the paper, but I can't remember if that was a general lack of academia or something related to the

note. That is quite, like, you're operating on quite a high level of philosophical experimentation there where it's like i mean you're creating a an unholy amount of legwork if they side with the idea that you've tried to communicate with the marker and therefore you will fail the paper but as a purely philosophical question it does raise an interesting you know uh issue of whether or not they have a right to fail you on account of a piece of paper they have specifically outlined you will not be graded on yeah i would be tempted to say that no one gave a shit um that seemed to

be the general mood of assessment you remember what so you mean to tell me you failed independently of the letter you write i believe so i believe I believe from memory that may well have been the case. I didn't fail a lot of things, though. It was pretty hard to actually fail stuff under the NCEA regime. I remember one time I got a letter from the Ministry of Education to our high school because my media studies teacher, very fond of me, said I was a bright boy, and he put me in the scholarship exam for it, and I went in, took one look at the first question in the paper.

Very complicated. I was way out of my depth. And I stood up in my seat, and I said, fuck this, and walked out. And I got a note back to the school saying that I was disrupting other people, which is quite fair enough. There's no need for that.

Truly, there wasn't. Yeah, but I understand, because by that point, you're literally on your way out the door at high school. I remember when I finished my last high school exam, I did a big cha-hoo on my way out the door. Fabulous. I didn't get reprimanded for that,

but rest assured, it was a big cha-hoo. One or two of the other pupils undoubtedly would have looked up from their papers to see who was cha-hooing. But so swiftly did I move, they probably only saw my ankles. Famous as they were, very difficult to identify someone from their ankles. Everyone knew Guy Montgomery's ankles, though, because you were so fast.

You were constantly... People were whipping around to see what that flash was. You're only going to get the ankles. Just heading out the door. Last thing you see. The only thing you see. It's too quick. That's right.

We've really meandered down a side road here. Should we get things back on track, Tim? Why? But why would you? I don't know how. Because there's so much to unpack here. Like I said, I've got reams of notes left over from the first screening. I've got, you know, manuscripts absolutely fucking filled to the corners of the page

with observations and questions of course you're right guys as as per usual i'm sorry you go what one of the one of the things i want to talk with you about and i'll be interested to know if you've noticed it is uh and one of the scenes when carrie and big it's early doors you know they're still very much smitten by one another uh are climbing into bed. Carrie does so. And look, I understand that the fashion is a huge part of what made this show what it is. But she's climbing into bed with a clutch,

quite a long pearl necklace, sort of reaching down towards her midriff, I would almost say, as she gets into bed. It drives me insane and also worries me like maybe i understand maybe a necklace that's slightly closer to uh you know that's shorter because it's it's got less free reign and that you know the the the field of movement it has is restricted and so it's not going to be obstructive or annoying but this is, a choking hazard. What bit of the movie is this in?

I'm trying to place this fashion item. It's early on, after they've maybe bought the apartment and she's been peeling corn and saying she wants to contribute to the apartment and they climb into bed and she's trying to read a library book, which is the greatest love letters ever written yeah i think i'd uh that was snooze time for me this this watch unfortunately won't happen again ah a little window you missed uh well anyway uh you know it probably made for a more relaxing screening because the whole time i was thinking is this a one-off is she going to take those pearls off these are questions that go unanswered.

But, I mean, I don't even know. I don't wear jewellery. But it's not really worn to bed, is it? Surely not. You're not going to wear a pearl necklace to bed. I mean, you'd wake up with a bunch of indentations in your neck, for one thing. You'd get a very bad sleep for another.

And thirdly, what if it gets sort of caught in something and you you break your necklace the pearls were crying out loud what got me it was so long like it could have easily wrapped around her neck you know what's my concern you know what uh the the loveliest bit of being in bed with someone where you just sort of tuck, tuck your arm around their neck. How's that going to play when you're wearing a pearl necklace? That's true. Bad for all involved. I couldn't agree more.

I mean, it's something for you to look out for in the, in the weeks moving forward. It's looking forward to it. It's a minor quibble, but one that, uh, I went to the trouble of,

you know, underlining, uh, to remind me that I need that I went to the trouble of underlining to remind me that I need talk about it. Holy hell. Sorry, I'm talking to you in headphones, and my phone just started ringing loud and clear through them as I was receiving a phone call from a man named Craig. I have chosen to decline it.

Oh, I see. Well, apologies to Craig. he'll be all right i'm just going to message craig to say i'll call him back all right sure well i'm going to assume you're not listening to this bit which is totally fine the shining light of this watch for me is the sheer amount of guacamole which samantha has plowed onto a corn chip while she is surreptitiously watching her very sexy neighbor taking his bathing suit off it is so much guac the first chip you look at it and you're like she's loaded that thing up she's gone to town on the avo. And then we cut to the surfer man, to Dante, famous for Dante's Peak, of course. And then we cut back to salivating Samantha,

and she has somehow bested her initial offering by putting even more guac on another chip. Puts it in her mouth. Impressively, does get the vast majority of it in but such as the amount of guac that there's actually just a tiny little corner um that gets on her mouth on the side of her mouth that doesn't quite fit in so much guac it's a brilliant piece of visual storytelling what it is is a visual metaphor for her sexual desire and uh appetite for dante's peak the guacamole is so much more than an avocado based dip uh from mexico it is uh her her ovaries really

exploding at the prospect of just fucking this guy's brains out she wants summer that peak like sir edmund hillary against his nemesis which he took to bed well that's true there is an adversarial sort of underpinning to her relationship to dante because you know it's a temptation that she does her best to resist to her credit don't you think samantha goes through a lot of personal growth in this film. We know that she's a horndog. She deals with her relationship to Smith Jarrett and the difficulties contained therein, I think with a lot of grace and dignity and respect. Absolutely. I couldn't agree more. That's why I want a Samantha movie.

I really do. She's so good in this film. That's why she was my shining light last week. She puts up this defense in the film everyone who's not guy where she's so tempted to fuck the brains out of her neighbor but she's obviously inside of a relationship with the man who looked after her during years of chemotherapy that she decides how she'll alleviate this or sort of make sure that she doesn't do anything to jeopardize the relationship is just gain a lot of weight.

So she just starts eating and eating. Or at least that's kind of what we're told by the movie. There's a shot of her returning to New York City because she's now based in Los Angeles so she can look after Smith's career, you know, better. And she comes back for, is it the baby shower for charlotte's baby shower and she walks in the door carries old apartment and there's a shot on her midriff and everyone looks really shocked and in the first viewing of this film i didn't even kind of figure

out what was going on but it turns out that um according to the movie what we're seeing on screen of her midriff is like a disgusting amount of overarching stomach far far in excess of what is acceptable um for a 50 year old woman about town i was like that's that's that's fine that's a it's a normal human you know i was exactly the same i sort of missed it it last time and then when I saw it today I was like that's a weird shot it's sort of got her cleavage and a tiny bit of her stomach in it

and then you get a reaction shot of Carrie being like whoa and I was like has Samantha had a boob job in this movie that we've missed that is exactly what I thought last watch as well someone's chucked a bra on there to kind of draw your attention away from what the filmmakers intended her breasts look fantastic but apparently we're supposed to be

looking at this uh this this gut yeah it's never that big it's not even that big it's not even that interesting and then they're kind of i mean you know it's it's a gentle roasting but it's not even that big it's not even that interesting and then they're kind of i mean you know it's it's a gentle roasting but it's a roasting all the same they're really giving her a little bit of their minds about the fact that she's uh as they say let herself go carrie does one of her trademark sort of uh you know observational quips or puns where she says what does your gut tell you and everyone laughs a little too hard at that. There was another moment. I mean, I'll tell you what. Can I just quickly, while we're talking about Carrie's comic sensibility.

Yeah. Obviously, she did the, when big colors, he really stays inside the lines line again. Outside the lines. Outside the lines. It was somehow even more uncomfortable this week um see because it's like when big colors it's and there's so much there's lust i don't know what it is in her voice when big colors the lot like and then what i can only imagine is 40 minutes of the film's runtime as she pauses for comic and lusty effect and then she then says uh he really cocks an eyebrow stays inside the

lines you then see samantha and charlotte laughing along at the joke you know but not in a way where they they get it and they laugh at how funny or right the observation is they're laughing along in the way you laugh when your friend has said something that might be witty and either you haven't quite understood it or they've slightly misspoken but it's of the moment and you're already laughing so it's too embarrassing to stop i love those moments it's when everyone recognizes that the format of humor has been laid bare in the conversation no one quite gets what the joke was what the intended sort of punch line or you know what the bit of humor was but we understand that what you've presented is the format of a joke so we shall laugh that is exactly what it is uh and it's i mean but that

you know in your day-to-day term i'm fine fine with that. Whatever. This is a movie. This is a comedy movie. Do another take, you reckon? Do another take. It's the lingering silence afterwards which tells me either she's, in not giving a straight answer to the question of how much sex her and Big have, but instead this vague innuendo,

she's revealed too much or she's made her friends uncomfortable unlikely or the more likely answer is she's made a joke which as you say follows the format and structure of joke telling but is largely incomprehensible and charlotte and samantha are just laughing it off until the conversation deviates elsewhere, did you have a shining light this watch? Have you sort of expressed that somewhere in this combo? You better believe I did. And it goes to the great Harry Runkle. Not even for a Runkle Crunkle, but for his...

This guy is a real workhorse when it comes to ADR. this guy is a real workhorse when it comes to ADR. I observed it first when in an establishing scene early on, he's at the table with Charlotte and their daughter and he feeds one of the dogs a little bit of food and he says, don't tell anyone. And it's sort of just an atmospheric throwaway line that doesn't do anything to move the story forward. It just sort of establishes some of Runkle's characteristics.

He's a cheeky guy. He loves his pets. It plays really well. And I thought that was nice. I wonder if he had to go into a booth to do that because you don't necessarily see his mouth saying the words exactly. And then, you know, not half an hour later, or when they're at the engagement, the rehearsal dinner at the restaurant.

By the way, that's a restaurant we went to. Did you remember that? No way. Yeah, on the Sex and the City tour that Jill from Time Out New York organized with us, we drove around on the bus and saw all the sites. We visited and walked through that exact space and restaurant. Holy shit. You're right.

But when they're outside after the dessert and they're all smoking, again in ADR, presumably, or, you know, it's a bit of atmospheric audio while they build up to the actual action of the scene, you hear the great Runkle saying, there's nothing like an illegal cuban cigar after dinner which is just such such a funny sentence like it's just so

matter of fact you know it's it's uh it's just it's a it's it's a dream to me i love that the flagrant disregard for rules and regulations that is what the upper echelon enjoy. They know they're not going to be prosecuted. It's a Cuban. It's a bloody symbol of wealth. I loved it so much. And so, yeah, his performance in the audio booth really took my breath away this week. Also, I'd like to say you did you see the cigar smoking stuff

this this this watch no i may have been asleep for that one too i'm sorry that's okay you i mean you did miss a a girthy chunk of the film no i don't think i did i don't think i did i think there's a lot that's packed into that like sort of 12 or so minutes i really do think that but i will i'll check on the next viewing which won't be far away but they're all smoking the cigars and then steve shows up to you know because he feels so awful about having cheated on and trying to apologize to miranda and uh miranda says a bit of privacy because she's also out huffing down a cigar with the lads it's big runkle and smith jettit uh she's, bit of privacy, please. She doesn't move.

They all sort of go back inside. This is not 10 seconds after Runkle has said there's nothing, you know, there's nothing like an illegal Cuban cigar after dinner. Presumably these cigars are still, you know, very much a go. No one chugs down a cigar in less than a minute. I mean, less than 15 seconds even and they go yeah and then they all march back inside an area where it's been established they can't smoke otherwise they'd be smoking them in there what are they going to do stuff these you

know half burned flaming cigars into their pockets and stink out their suits and the entirety of the restaurant that evening i don't know i don't know if i don't know if this is uncouth but we i i enjoy a cigar you know it is special occasion probably not as expensive as what these big boys are chomping their teeth down onto but um i you know you put them out you save them save them for later it's a lot of a lot of shit to get through if you try and knock one off in a single sitting but i'm with you it's um it does beg the question what are they doing with those cigars they just put them out on their hands or what i don't know but also yeah it also just quickly while we're while we're at this part of

the film in this locale specifically i understand that miranda's desire to have a private conversation with steve about you know their relationship and uh the the pains contained within it but her idea of privacy is asking the people she knows to move and then having a very raw and honest discussion literally in the entranceway to a popular and trendy restaurant in soho uh just go five, ten metres down the road. You don't need to tarnish other people's nights with the intensity of your feelings. You also aren't going to be able to communicate. It's a courtesy thing.

And while I am an avowed Miranda fan, mostly from sustained exposure in Sex and the City 2 when she's the only person with a shred of empathy, it's just a little it's a little thing and it's not a lot i don't know that it warrants bringing up but i just wanted to say it yeah well i appreciate you noticing it and noting it down for all time in this immortal record of sex in the city the 2008 film um i am supposed to dash right now to to i've got a sort of an appointment but um there's something that i wanted to uh bring up with you which may sustain through multiple episodes i'm not sure but there is a question which carrie poses in the film that i would like us to take a stab at and that is what else do we know

here's the scene charlotte's just had her baby baby rose is out wrinkles over the moon absolutely besotted with this young one he says it is my lot in life to be surrounded by beautiful women love that line love the delivery love everything about it they're in there um there's a brief conversation about big who took charlotte to the hospital after her water broke when she gave him heaps after they were in the cafe and had a bit of a tete-a-tete and he he ducked out carrie says um that well today's not about big today is about beautiful baby rose we know that she's's got Charlotte's hair. What else do we know? And then the scene ends.

But I want to know, what else do we know about Rose? Because we know a lot about Brady. And we know a lot about the trajectory of this future Rat King. But what do we really know about Charlotte's first biologically born daughter, Rose? I mean, how much can you know about a a newborn um again you're delving into the dangerous territory of needing to revisit other materials namely sex in the city too to see you know what sort of development has taken place in the two preceding years or following years cries a lot she does cry a lot i know

that she sort of stretches charlotte's ability to mother uh to its to its the limits of its elasticity uh i i mean there's there's no reason to to think that this isn't just you know a fortunate daughter charlotte and runkel's life in this movie is the only one that appears to be, I mean, when Miranda and Steve get back together, that does. I got goosebumps again, by the way, when I saw that. I'm starting to think it might have something to do

with Al Green's How Can You Mend a Broken Heart playing during their reunion, but the hairs on my arm were standing up on end again. I was overwhelmed by the biology of it. I think she's got a pretty nice life i i mean some of charlotte's more neurotic mannerisms we haven't even spoken about the fact that she shits herself in this movie which i love ah i want to gloss over it it's it's it's i don't like people shitting their pants in movies it's a bit much for me it was my least favorite bit of

bridesmaids as well which was a film i otherwise really loved but i was like god damn it i just wish that bit wasn't there i love it it's funny shit is funny it's also responsible for dragging carrie out of her slump exactly i was going to say it's a very good plot device um it's it's used to good effect in this film look i really i should dash but i just want to posit that it is possible that rose is a gifted child um and has some sort of power that we're not quite aware of yet but i'm sure we'll explore that in future episodes like to thank there's no rush this episode's sponsor guacamole um guacamole it's the perfect dip when you're trying not to have a extra um relationship affair if that's the term chuck some guac extra and you're gone i guess it's true actually uh

you know put it put it in put it in an orifice put your dick in it it's guacamole it's there for you yeah exactly uh anything else you want to add on the tail end of the second watch It's guacamole. It's there for you. Yeah, exactly. Anything else you want to add on the tail end of the second watch of hopefully 52 of Sex and the City Guy? I just want to say congratulations to Jonathan Philly and Dana Robin, the unit production managers. God knows what a job they did on set. But they certainly did a good enough job to warrant first billing as the credits rolled.

And I thought, wow, for a couple of unit production managers, you just know that's massive. So my sincere congratulations to them. Well done, guys. Big congrats from me also. Thanks, guys. See you soon. Bye, Tim. We just have a good rhythm together.

He sort of feels me out. I feel him out. And we go for it.