The Worst Idea Of All Time - Family Time 12

Episode Date: July 31, 2024

New Zealand launches an opening salvo in the Comedy Olympics, as Tim and Guy ponder standup’s answer to the unrepeatable performance of Simone Biles. The boyz stare down the barrel of their loosening grip on pop culture, their attention taken up instead by questions about the origin of smell and moisture-wicking fabric. Regular Family Time segment, “What Were We Doing 1-3 Years Ago, When This Email Was Sent?” reveals some stunning serendipity.Find more on our Substack! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It's the worst idea, it's the worst idea of all time. It's the worst idea, it's the worst idea of all time. Hey guy. Hey. We on. We on baby boy. Oh, okay. I'm with you. I just played guy a song for from a real old video game called solstice. That's where that was from. I'll just play it. I know it's gonna copyright strike this. No, it's very impressive. This was made a long time ago. so long ago on not like the like a calculator not BC not that far back still a D so check this

out this was the internet hole that I fell into last night after dad after my dad was born When that fucking acid hits, man. And then just into a prog rock romp. It's incredible to think someone figured out how to make that music for a Gameboy, right? Tim Fowlin, essentially, yeah, it was a Nintendo Entertainment System, which is like a Gameboy, but yeah, but you know, you plug it into the wall and you tally. That is, isn't it funny that I really think of that of you when I think of that music. You should. You should. And you should.

I used to listen to 8-bit music when I was in high school. I'd just rock around with my mini discs full of downloaded 8-bit chiptune. This is before it got acceptable. I recorded... The funny thing when we catch up, especially on mic, is every sort of second or third anecdote or memory I have in my life. I have no idea whether or not I've shared it prior. There's only one way to find out.

But I wouldn't listen to it at school, but during high school I recorded, there was a radio show I liked called Pulp Sport. I was on Radio Sport, which was a radio station about sport, which is probably how they came up with the name. And there was a show called Pulp Sport. station about sport which is probably how they came up with the name and there was a show called the pulp sport I thought was the greatest funniest thing I'd ever heard and I recorded their last ever episode on cassette and for a full year every night before I went to sleep I would play the recording of the last

episode of pulp sport on the cassette. Holy shit I didn't know that. And I learned it all off by heart and then recently I was either walking or driving. I was moving either by car or by leg. And I thought, I was thinking, I thought, I wonder if I can remember that. And I couldn't remember anything. I can remember some of the, there's an NRL play called Brayth and Astor,

who's now an analyst who'd been caught up in a salary cap scandal and had been crying and I remember in the episode they bullied him for crying which was obviously very funny and remains so there was a segment about Keith Quinn sound by the way could it be your dog yeah is it the dog don't mention let him in he wants to have a chat to us Rufus can come in he probably is hearing our voice was the Rufus can come in. He probably is hearing our voice. Was it Rufus? Oh, there he is. Anyway, Keith Quinn, is he RIP? Is he no longer with us? I don't know, but the sports commentator, right? The segment was, you know, the Mighty Quinn, the Bob John song. Come on. Wait, is that Bob Dylan? I thought it was Man for Man's Earth Band. Maybe they covered it. It could be.

You know, a lot of those artists of the time were covering each other's music. And now... They were swapping wives, they were swapping tracks. The modern artists are taking old songs and just re-rubbing them. Do I never understand... Define re-rubbing. I like this. We've got remixes.

You're familiar with those. What was that? There was a really popular one, which was Rocketman. Oh, that's exactly what I was thinking too. Yeah. And that was a rerub. Are you talking about the latest one? Yeah, and it was like a woman singing and it was like a sort of elevator style electronic

hit. It was just nothing. But Alton John's on it as well. Is this the one, the version you're talking? Yeah, I think so. Almost definitely. Everyone's going to know who this is except for us. But they did, yeah.

I've heard this on the radio the last couple of years, this version of Rocket Man, I'm like, who the fuck is doing this? Rocket Man, uh, modern. And they've just added like a disco beat drum. It was Dua Lipa. That, yeah, correct. Who is, I've since found out one of the biggest acts in the world. Yeah, so huge. You know who got on early into her train Ray O'Leary, no way huge fan from day one. Yeah, well cuz

Australian comedian because he moved says no longer a Kiwi. I remember when James Mustapik was on Spelling Bee, he had tickets to Dua Lipa. Yes. And he'd had tickets to see Dua Lipa one night, the night he was on an afternoon episode. And he won the episode. Oh no. And so couldn't go to Dua Lipa. And so he got his ticket and then organised for a ticket for the next night. Yes.

But he'd won two episodes in a row, so he came back onto the third consecutive episode in the afternoon and was like, I have to lose. He missed Dua Lipa two times? He missed her once, bought a ticket to a different night, and then almost missed her again. Because of your game show. And took a dive. Fuck, did he really?

And I didn't know who Dua Lipa was. This would have been a year and a half ago, two years ago. This is November 2022. You do the math listener. I sure as hell won't. Tell you who she's different from. Who? Ariana Grande.

Yeah, they're different people. I'll tell you how I know that. Different names. Dua Lipa was in that movie that came out on Netflix that like was apparently huge. But no one, everyone who sees it gets like immediate amnesia about what happened in it. And I think John Cena is also in it. I think you're just describing pop culture. A little bit, but this was a even more insipidly featureless product than usual. And I think you and I have even talked about it on the pod.

What is something you've consumed? There should be a word by the way. Priorly. To do something in the style of prior. There should be a word by the way, priory. To do something in the style of prior. Yeah, like a synonym for previously, but just another one. Priory. What is a book, a movie? Priory to being a father I read and now I don't read. No, no, but what can you remember?

Is there anything in pop culture you've consumed that you can tell me? Recently? Yeah. Or from any... Just from just like, just what is your relationship to remembering what you've consumed that you can tell me. Like recently? Yeah. Just from just like just what is your relationship to remembering what you've consumed? Oh. What is the plot of the last book you read? Oh, what's the last book I read?

Um, well, I can't remember what the last book I read was, but I read nonfiction often. This doesn't speak to... And now I've started listening to audible books. So now I'm trying to remember what the last one of those was don't know the book that most immediately comes into my head in terms of like one that really stuck with me that I read the last five years is probably sapiens and you remember the plot where it's nonfiction so what's the idea with the idea is not the plot I want the plot the plot is there are these crazy

Borg monkeys could human beings and their superpower is creating stories and getting getting real jazzed up about each other stories That's a then Noah. Uval Harari apparently is I don't know something of a bullshit artist. Oh, he's out. It's a bit Everyone's we're not here to cancel anyone. I just think you mix but it's a banger of a bullshit artist. Oh, he's out. It's a bit of everyone's. We're not here to cancel anyone. I just think you mix, but it's a banger of a book. I will say that homo deus, the follow up very scary. Is it scary? What does that say? I'm a deus is like, because sapiens is like how we got here in homo deus is we were going next and we were going next as merging with AI and just becoming a digital data stream. It wasn't good, the ending, it scared me. What's your relationship with pop culture like guy? What's the most recent thing you consumed?

I'm behind the eight ball. I watched the Simone Biles documentary on Netflix last night. Two Pada. Huge fan of hers. Is the hype, the hype seems justified from the little... There's a lot of hype about it? No, her specifically. I actually even, I didn't know there was a doc out about it. I mean, no, the hype about her, it's not hype because it's just a reflection of all she's accomplished,

which is more than any athlete in history. Did she do some moves that got like banned? She, no, she can do moves that neither a woman gymnast can. Right. So she's had four moves named after her. I think possibly more, maybe five now. And only one of the only one of them has been performed in competition by gym, a woman gymnast who is not Simone Biles.

So in her arsenal, it would be like if a comedian had developed jokes. Oh, really looking forward to seeing how you could tie this to comedy analogy. So much funnier than what anyone else can deform. And so, but no, but then like on a lineup, everyone's trying to be as funny as that comedian, but that comedian is like, well, I've got access to these jokes that are impossibly funny. They're funny in a way that no one else has ever been this funny before. And you can see, you can technically understand how they do it,

but you physically are not capable of doing it. I guess a lot of things are like that, aren't they? Anything that involves skill. Yeah, comedies is a bad, it was a bad for instance. You got into it and you tried to get out of it. I didn't want to get out of it. I wanted to stay there until it worked. What is the difference then between gymnastics and comedy that that analogy didn't work? Let's get into this.

Because the gym and gym, well for a start- Gym's a bit more objective isn't it? You're being judged. there's a point scale. And it's pretty, you know, there's a little bit of stylistic point scoring. Yeah, the moves are judged within an angle of precision to themselves. So you're counting the rotations.

I mean, and you could analyze comedy to this point, but that would be to kind of miss the point of- I don't think you can. But you could like watch a comedy set and you could say you did this you can score I guess so but the quality and you can jokes can't be scored or you could you could grade the you know you could grade the the intensity the power of the punchline what an incredible endeavor for someone develop the rubric through which we attach a numeric quantity. Isn't that last comic standing?

It's a reality show already. Did you watch the, um, did you watch the Kill Tony with Trump and Biden on it recently? I've seen, uh, YouTube has been suggesting I give it a go. That thing blew up. I think it's up to like 8 million views now. Wow. Yeah.

It's only been up for about a week. I've never actually watched Kill Tony. Kill Tony. I hadn't really either. I looked up click. I googled the premise. Yeah. And it's not it's it's it's a nice idea. You're instead of an open mic. Basically, it started in LA instead of an open mic. Yeah. Where everyone's waiting for three minutes and only a certain number of people get called, everyone gets called for a minute and then you get torched by a panel of professionals. Which is actually something you'd want to go to.

But then because they've got like this whole live band as well, it just elevates everything so much. It kind of gives it this Def Jam quality to it. Which is a little bit of what I have tried to do with Muckaround by having a drummer on stage the whole time. But it's not quite the same. It's different isn't it? And it's not carte blanche, people aren't saying anything they like. Killtony?

No, the Muckaround. Oh it's an open mic so people people are testing new stuff, but... But Kill Tony's wild, isn't it? Kill Tony's... Yeah, I guess so. And as much that I think, you know, the American comedy scene is a bit more... Hmm. Especially newer comics.

I guess this is true everywhere. Newer comics are there to provoke a reaction and it's almost irrelevant what that reaction is. It's just like, I can get some kind of rise out of the audience of one. Whereas then you do stand up for a little bit longer and you're like, you know, it would be nice if it was more laughs than groans or boos. If it was controlled. Yeah.

It was the right kind of reaction. If we're letting control, anyone can get behind the wheel of a car. Hmm. Technically true. I drove your car the other day. Yeah. How did the right kind of reaction. We're letting control. Anyone can get behind the wheel of a car. Technically true. I drove your car the other day. Yeah. How did you feel about that?

You offered it up. I felt great. There were two cars. I wasn't. One had to get back. Tim doesn't drive if anyone's wondering why this is of interest. Yeah, and I don't have a full license. Yeah, but none of that was my concern.

You were driving in, I I would say four sequential straight lines That's true and the deed of in the middle of holidays. I think so like the streets are empty at the moment I thought it was grand. I loved being able to ask you to do it. I love that. You said yes I love that. I got an errand done. Mm-hmm And then we went home had a cup of tea with Chelsea. We did it was so good It was lovely you guys have just been to Japan recently. Am I allowed to say that? Fuck.

Is that a secret? Cat's out of the bag. No, I, yeah, we have been to Japan recently. Did you post about it? This is how proud I am of myself. I wouldn't even fucking know. That's how little I'm on Instagram. That's amazing.

I did, I made a post. I made a post and I wrote a caption and I actually, you know, I drafted the caption for an hour. Oh, wait a minute. I did see this because I think this filter throw into Facebook, which I am still on. I don't know how to do it. Facebook shares my, my comedian page shares. How old are we? We're like, who's Dua Lipa? How do you stop Instagram sharing onto Facebook?

At least it's like old men talk fondly at cloud. That's true. Old men are interested by cloud. Old men use their hand as a visor to block the sun to look at cloud rather than shake fist at. And there's nothing wrong with that? No, there's just old men. Last time I checked. Yeah, exactly.

I got this yellow shirt. Yeah, what do you think of it? I got it in Japan. Reminds me of golf. Oh yeah? I think because it's got a polo collar on it. It's made by Fila. Oh yeah.

And it's got this, I've never really, I've seen it but it's got the long sleeve. It's got the long sleeve on the collared shirt. It feels nice, it's a nice kind of cotton. It's not too heavy by the looks of things. It feels good. I think it goes well with blue. Yellow is a good color on you.

60% cotton, 40% polyester. How about that? Chelsea's, she's all cotton all the time. Because I bought a cool top. Tell me more. I got told off for it being, I don't get told off, but just like, ah, it's polyester, it's not going to breathe. That's true. She's not lying about that.

Plus you get the micro plastics coming into the wash with that. I'm not worried about that. It's a climber light. They use climber light technology, sweat wicking technology. Sweat wicking technology, huh? Well, cause aren't, what are all the sports jerseys made of? Fuck if I know, mate. It's not cotton.

Is it not? What is, I'm going to look it up. What do they make the NBA singlets out of? Teflon. What do they make the NBA singlets out of? Man, that's a great question because it does have to wick. It has to be the best wicking stuff but I also think it's probably a like a like a polymer mmm some kind of basketball

jersey typically made from polyester nylon or a combination of the two there you go polyester nylon poly nylon. An authentic basketball jersey is just like it sounds. A jersey designed to be worn by actual NBA players. Thanks the internet. Officially licensed Nike jerseys are made of 100% recycled lightweight polyester with Aero Swift technology that wicks moisture away and dries quickly. How good.

Is that what you're looking for in a top? It's moisture wicking abilities? No, I just sort of look cool. Disimportant to you, Guy? You're leading an active lifestyle to the point where there is so much sweat coming out of your pores all the time that needs to be wicked from your body,

thrown to the surface level of your clothing so that the sun can do its damage and evaporate it off. It was a bit like that. It was 38 degrees. Forgot you're in Japan. And I thought I want something that's breathable. But it gets dry quick, but it gets wet quick too. Excuse me, shopkeeper. Retains smell.

I want something that will breathe, but also made of plastic. Do your worst. Yeah. And they come back with a basketball shirt for you. And that's what it was like. I loved Japan. I think it's an incredible country. And if you've been there, congratulations.

If you've not been there and you can at any point go, why wouldn't you? And that is my review of Japan. Japan's got it all. It's got old stuff. It's got quite old stuff and really new stuff. And that's the thing I enjoyed most about it. Big scale.

New Zealand doesn't have that much very old stuff at all. Like our oldest churches are about a hundred years old. Our oldest stuff is our landscape, which is true for everywhere. Yeah. So, There's nothing special about that. Our oldest stuff made by humans

What predates us predates the cult the colonies the colonizers true doesn't it? There were but it's not hyper visible. Like there's not a lot of I haven't been to a lot of pars that are still around No, but maybe that's on me to be honest No, it would be good. If I open this notebook, this physical notebook and get listener mail out of it. But at least I have to resort to the screen. I'll write something in there to a device. You're gonna write some mail while guys doing that.

I'll sully myself by dipping into the digital mail bag and thanks everyone for getting in touch with us. Between three years ago and now because that's probably the mail that we've got you know to get into. So I've got a specific tag in my Gmail it's still called the friend zone so I haven't updated it and some of the more the older but still unread stuff is from, can you believe this, the year 2020, it literally is two years old, because it's from July. That doesn't feel good that it's that old.

Someone has given us $25 via PayPal, which you can no longer do, because they changed the functionality of the platform, and said, please don't say my name. My darling Tim Guy, Montbatten. It's from peter teal this one. I have a lot to say check your email let me check this is from the right person they said how come some poos smell more than other poos? Who's that from? Gray in Texas. Greg.

That's a G. It's a more common name. It's a good question, Greg. And it's one I don't have the answer to. Tim, the floor is yours. You eat different stuff. Yeah. And different stuff produces a different end result.

Not only in the sort of input output chain of what poo is, but also in that whatever you're eating affects your microbiome. And that's the thing, breaking down the food, producing different sort of gases, which is actually the thing you're smelling. You're not smelling the poo. The poo is a solid. You're smelling the gas. So you're eating...

That's interesting. A lot of... When I poo in the bowl, the smell is the gas. It must be, right? No, some of it has to be coming from the poo. Well, yeah, it's the gas of the poo. No. What about when I stand in a dog poo?

Okay. Yes. Half an hour after the dog's done the poo. You're smelling the gas. And my foot smells dog poo. Okay. Yes. Half an hour after the dogs done the poo. You're smelling the gas and my foot smells. You're thinking of farts, which are different things. But the thing hitting your nose is the gas of the poo. Surely. It's like an aerosoled part of the poo. What makes a flower smell gas? Is it? Well, gas is just a state of matter, right? And I would have thought that if it was floating around in the air, it's gas. I'm in the awkward position.

I don't know how much of what you're saying you know and how much of what you're saying you're making up. I'm going by feel here. I'm going by touch. No, I just think if I step in the poo, it's not gas that's making it smell. You don't reckon? No, it's the poo. I see it to you.

That person who gave us money who wanted me to read something. There's the message, right? Okay You can do the screen reading Cuz I abhor it. I'll just read it in my head. Oh And don't say their name because I said that But you shouldn't say that email is Peter teal at PayPal calm Dear Tim guy Montbatten. I was gonna message you when I hashtag paid the boys, but a mere comment box is insufficient. This was seen on the 4th of July, 2022.

On the 4th of July. What were you doing? Celebrating America's Independence Day, Eve, because we are in a time zone that precedes America and you know how I celebrate the 4th of July every year on behalf of my American friends now get shitface drunk and I Light stuff on fire. I went out for I went out for odd Do you know what we were doing on when this email was sent you know what you and I did what? We went to Top Gun Maverick together.

That rocks. Was that two years ago? On the 4th of July, I took you to Top Gun Maverick. And I remember I went there and I kind of enjoyed it. And I remember afterwards you were like, I can see how people, like you didn't enjoy it. I enjoyed the experience on that. What I do remember is it being really funny that they wouldn't

name what nation the enemy was. It was, it was like quite a crucial part of the plot, but it was this stateless enemy. So while that's happening, Peter Thiel writes, I was chatting with some friends last fall about which Sex and the City girl we were. Oh. I was dubbed a total Samantha, which I think must be because of my independence last fall about which Sex in the City girl we were. Paul. I was dubbed a total Samantha which I think must be because of my independence in logistical competence.

I confess that I no longer enjoy this show because being in my 30s and living in an East Coast metro area, I find these women absolutely unrelatable. If only for the lack of rats doing acrobatics on their window bars. When I was 17, the show seemed so plausible. Oh, how we live and learn. No, I said I just can't seem to enjoy it anymore. But then one of them mentioned a podcast that reviewed Sex and the City, the movie every week for a year.

I started on season four and have been hooked ever since. Absolutely loved Drugs in a Tree. How most people remember. And I long for the days when the Boner Inspector and George Lazenby were in my life. On to business. We've got a big merch opportunity on our hands here. Please direct your attention to Emmanuel episode 32 socks. While keeping in mind the frosty fellas catchphrase, please tell me

copyright issues are the reason you aren't currently selling socks that say often licked, never beaten. Well, I usually approach socks. I mean, I could respond to that because we literally stole it off an ice cream company that's in New Zealand. While I usually approach socks as mean, I could respond to that because we literally stole it off an ice cream company that's in New Zealand. While I usually approach socks as an abomination that should only be tolerated when in danger of losing a toe to frostbite. Wow, this is an anti sock email. All over the show with socks.

I have a soft spot for lewd inside joke footwear and the sentimental is one that I, and the sentiment is one that I and I think most women can firmly get behind. Think it over, my sweet antipody in pre-moguls. So I guess the joke is that the toes are often licked. Never beaten? Yeah. On a more sentimental note, you guys are really special to me. You keep me laughing all the time, obviously. That's short for obviouslyvs. Thank you. But also it's so refreshing to listen to you two being kind to each other. Refreshing. Those in your lives and your communities.

It's been a rough few years in the US. I'm glad things took such a positive turn after this email was sent. Yeah. And 2022 has been particularly uninspiring. So hearing about NZ and its people are just going the difference does not make the country safer and better really fills my emotional cup. You're truly lovely boys. And I hope you can feel how much your audience appreciates you.

By the way, Twyat introduced me to Mwibumbam. So next time you see them throw a you're welcome their way. Love you. Fuckos. Say my name if you feel like it. Well, you don't have a bad face. All right. Here we go. The name? Peter Thiel, Washington DC.

He lives here. Oh. No, he doesn't really, but he's a New Zealand citizen. Good on him. Yeah. God bless. But he's not a good guy, eh? No.

And now he's got one of his dudes in the White House, potentially. Who's that? JD? JD. JD Bones. I've got something on our Instagram here, at twiwappod. in the White House potentially. Who's that? JD? JD. JD Vains. I've got something on our Instagram here at twiwappod. Probably more recent than 2022, July.

Y'all, when's this one from? June 29th. This year? Yeah. Sick. So recent. Let me say- Wait a minute, June, oh yeah, sorry.

Let me say love you and congratulations on the work you've done. We've met before in Portland, Oregon, and I've been listening since season two. But listening to season one in its entirety has been incredible. Ep 51 just blew my mind because you were joking about scarring the teens who've been playing bridge over troubled water all night. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. I had to share only because coincidentally the same thing happened to me after a Ween show in Atlanta.

I was carpooling with other Ween fans up and down the East Coast back in 2017 in one night while incredibly stacked on LSD I put on Bridge. It came on and I decided I had a mission. I just kept repeating it and repeating it for about six hours while we all kind of lost our gourds lol. Hearing about your experience made me need to tell you about my psychological experiment amongst folks I've been travelling with, but it had not only days. Also podcasting a tree made me want to reach out, sorry for the fact that you introduced

me to Noah. Oh, hell yeah, man. And that is the correspondence. So I actually had a New Year's, there's a lot to respond to in there. I had a New Year's resolution to see Lewis Cole, who's one half of Noah, live before the end of this year. And unfortunately, I don't think it's going to come to pass. There was like a potential window of, it would have been fucking wild to try and do it.

But I, you know, a bit of the year where maybe I could have tried to pull a lot of strings and load up a few credit cards and do it. But he's apparently, it looks to me like he's stopping touring to maybe record some stuff or write some stuff or have a break, which is so weird. He's got a new album out next month. And I'm really looking forward to it because he recorded it with a full orchestra. I'm happy. I'm happy to hear. I just want to say that that, recorded it with a full orchestra. I'm happy. I'm happy to hear it. I just want to say that that, um, the repeated listing of Bridge Over Trouble

Water makes me think of, and also sort of not just connect to the origins of this podcast, the Beths, fantastic New Zealand band, the Beths, when they're on the road, they have a game called Baker's Dozen, where one of them gets to choose a song and they have to listen to it 13 times in a row. And they do like Instagram updates of how the Baker's Dozen is going. That's awesome. where one of them gets to choose a song and they have to listen to it 13 times in a row. And they do like Instagram updates of how the Baker's Dozen is going. That's awesome. And it's incredible to see.

And by the 12th or 13th plane particularly, they're always absolutely elated. You know, like they're coming out the other side of a journey. It's beautiful. Yeah. Because that's a whole album of just one track over and over really. Yeah it is. And if you haven't checked out the Beths. You simply must. They're one of our greatest cultural exports of the last hundred years.

Yeah. They're cool. They really are. Do you want to do some more messages from people? I think so. One each and then maybe seal it up. Yeah. And be on our way.

Cause I have to go to a thing. Unfortunately. What are you going to go do? Um, I had a meeting today at 11 that I simply did not turn up to. And I got an email at 10 past 11 saying, Hey man, uh, you close by. You want me to make a coffee order for you? And I went, I am at home about 12 kilometers away. I'm so sorry. Would you like to reschedule? And they said yes.

That's okay. The inverse happened to me this morning. You went somewhere? I was ready for a meeting and then I said, are you? I said, hey, you're nearby, I'm going to have to go. Was it me? No. And they said, oh my gosh, I'm so sorry.

And it was fine. I mean, I don't sorry. And it was fine. I mean, I don't know how different people feel at different times. Was it work or was it a friendly coffee with someone? Or one of those business and pleasure. Business and pleasure. This is a message from someone who I shall see at the end if they want their name read. Dear Gaimon and Tim Funkle.

I'm writing to say that while the podcast is a joy, this by the way was sent 7722. So that's a date which both Americans and New Zealanders can understand. One of very few. That's actually interesting. Do y'all know what, what were you doing on the 7th of July, 2022? Thinking about Maverick, digesting.

Yeah. Just going, who is that Glenn Powell? I bet he's really going to make a fist of it in the next couple of years in Hollywood. And I was right, god damn it. I was um... He's getting there, folks. At a look of deep concentration on his face as he squints into his calendar to try and determine exactly what was happening on the 7th of July in the Year of Our Lord 2022. I'm pretty sure I found out that we got funding to make Gaumont Gormley's Gaumont Spellingby.

Huge day. Because I had an audition in there and I found out on the way to the audition. And you were like, fuck this. And I still, I went into the audition. This is to act and I'm not a great actor. And I went into the audition and I was talking to the woman who was running the audition

and then she was filming me saying, name your height and your agent or whatever. And then are you available for the shoot dates? And I said, what are the shoot dates? And she told me, and I said, no, I just found out. Um, I'm going to be making a TV show. I'm going to be making my own TV show while you're filming this. And she said, why are you here?

And I said, I was going to do the audition. And she said, you are you here? And I said, I was going to do the audition. And she said, you should be somewhere else celebrating. That's really, was that in a nice way? She said that? That's so great. That was so happy for me. Because why are you here? It sounds like you're wasting our time to me. Well, I guess I was wasting everyone's time.

But I'd said yes. Yeah. You know, I felt I had to go. Different set of circumstances. Isn't that interesting? Yeah. That's why it was a big week. The day before that, I just saw we'd watch Shrek the third. And then the day after that,

the day after that, Charles, Oliver and I went to Rarotonga. Far out. Your calendar was packed. It was. Far out. Your calendar was packed. It was. Trying to listen to it chronologically is not a joy. I listen to about 10 episodes a day while I'm at work

and because my podcatcher doesn't have an episode search functionality I have to scroll through episodes of Sex and City 2 followed by Grown Ups 2, followed by Sex and City 1, etc. to arrive at my place amidst Emmanuel. I accidentally made it through three episodes of season four before realizing I was about a full presidential term off target can't fault you for what you've done with the place but it's a fucking mess I think you can back date episode so hopefully Tim will

spend what would have otherwise been a lovely productive evening fixing this minor irritation two years ago they sent me this. I will be paying the boys when I hear this read on ear as I'm currently broke say my name in as unique a way as possible before because as far as I know it can't be done. Grana Mlaaka. PS everybody within the power of my voice should watch Taskmaster NZ season two featuring Guy himself. It's on YouTube and is the best television I've ever seen. Heartfelt shit that it didn't make. Heartfelt shit that doesn't make good radio below.

I genuinely love the podcast and you two fine fellows are a consistent shining light in a world that seems to be getting darker and darker. Some of these PS's are separate letters. Your efforts to brighten the world are not unnoticed. I want to try the name. We must have been laying it on pretty thick in 2022 to get these sorts of messages.

Green town. Blue. We're going to need to take a shower after that. There's the arc. To your central point, I know I've said this for multiple years, but it is being fixed. It's in the queue. It's in the queue? Yeah.

There's a queue of things being done now that we've got our beautiful editor Brendan, which is a great reason to support us on Substack because we need to pay for his time. Yeah. What about, um, I like what they say. I love what you've done with the place, but it's a mess. It's a fucking mess. I thought that was a beautiful sentence. It really helped create a mental image for me of, I suppose it's like a lounge and it's got a lot of interesting stuff, but it's not organized in a way. So if there was a worst idea of all time, you know, room in a museum, you'd want it to be laid out in a chronological, you could map the journey.

You'd go, ah, this, and then it was this, and then it was this. Yeah. And that really captured the essence of what it looks like. I have to go down the Sex and City 2 corridor of six episodes to get to my Emmanuel episode that I'm up to, which is in the back room for some weird reason. Yeah. It should be at the front.

It's tough. Like a memory palace, but a memory museum. Can you do that memory palace stuff? You know what I've been enjoying lately? When I go to sleep, I just, I'm not even reading in bed at the moment. I used to do reading until I was tired. And I guess you throw your phone in another room and the phone's not allowed. Yeah, that's a, that's a different thing.

That's because you're afraid of the radio waves while you're sleeping. Yeah, that's right. But now I lie there. I just, I let my thoughts just, I let my thoughts run wild. And it makes, honestly, I've been doing it enough now that I feel, um, connected to my experience as a boy or a teenage boy of like remembering that feeling of lying there and letting my thoughts organize themselves and being like, wow, it's interesting how I have different thoughts, like I think differently at night.

I remember the experience of noticing that. But then, uh, obviously when I was a teenager, I think differently at night. I remember the experience of noticing that but then Obviously when I was a teenager I started listening to that pulp sport tape over and over again And now obviously that I've forgotten that I need to find the tape and do it all over again It's a real bugger that what you say about how your mind works differently night because I find that but like I should go to bed But I get access to a beautiful bit of my brain I don't get access to during the daytime. Have you got any jokes, Tim? No. Get bent. I got one for you.

Go on. Um, how do you keep an ugly monster in suspense? I'll tell you tomorrow. Far out, folks. He got my ass. That'll do it for us for this episode. I get Olive to tell that joke. It's not mine by the way, I got it from a book. Putting the wheels on a new thing, which will come out later. When are we recording that? Trying to do some math. 2024.

But do you know what we should do before then? Because we need maybe something to bridge a little bit as we really should, I think, watch cats too. And I think we should do a live stream. Watch along that YouTube cats thing. Yeah. That fan made cats to movie. Cause do you know that I'm so sorry I've forgotten your name, but the person who sent God and who made it.

Thank you. God, that was embarrassing. So guy for ages, I had my laptop, all these fucking tabs open and I... That was your holy grail tab. You couldn't close that tab down. I kept rebooting the computer and then re-initiating it and the program would crash and I'd bring it back and I just couldn't let the cats 2 tab shut because I knew I would forget that we need to do it. So here it is on the record we should do that. Okay. Because it looked wild. It did look pretty nutso. My mum's calling me. Alright over to you. She'll want to know

how I'm going. You better go tell her. I'll turn everything off. We'll see you soon, guys.