The Worst Idea Of All Time - Family Time 27

Episode Date: July 10, 2025

Good news everybody - Guy’s better! Quordle journeys, banana comedy and a request for HOW TO SEND MONEY TO US??? (Boy, are we bad at #business) is all just a listen away.Support us to keep the mailbag a-openin' at twioat.substack.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What matters most to you? Is it unforgettable adventures? Connections with lifelong friends? Peaceful moments of reflection? Feelings of joy and freedom you can't wait to experience again and again? Or is it the vehicles that help you make all those special moments possible? Whatever your answer is, Toyota is here to bring you closer to the things that matter to you. Because they matter to us too.

Toyota. For what matters most. Welcome to family time everybody. It's your boys Tim and Ga- I feel like I'm back on the radio. It's your boys Timber and Ga-Ga. And Carrie Bradshaw Because why wouldn't she be here with us? We stan a legend we stan an icon and we stan a queen Can I say that yeah, you're allowed to say Queen 25 if you're a Monarchist dude, you better start saying Queen. How are you, man? I'm actually good. Do you know what? I'm good. Actually good feels conditional well, no since we lasted one of these I don't know if you remember, I was

somewhat on my haunches and I... You're a bit sick. I had what I had a two-week tail for a cough that has been vanquished from my life. Yes. I am sleeping through the night. Great. I'm sleeping in a bed with my beautiful partner. Love that. I am. We've brought it up before. Honestly, the funniest moment from the substance that I think there is. I get to sleep in a race car bed. I get to sleep in a bed with my wife. I sleep in a big bed with my wife. So no,

things are on the up. Things are on the up And then curiously, there's something in the offing, which are going to bring things back down to planet earth. Yes, there is. For the benefit of you, the listener, stroke viewer, and to the detriment of myself. Which this feels like an apropos moment to bring it up. What Guy is referring to is going to be pretty resource intensive. So if you were ever on the fence about joining the Substack now would be a phenomenal time to throw

your support behind the boys so that we can continue to do stupid things for you. Twioat.substack.com. Should we dive into the mailbag my friend? Yeah I'll get in there too. Beautiful. I'm going to check social media. Oh hell yeah brother. I'm gonna check social media. Oh hell yeah brother. I'm gonna get into the inbox which is um we're actually we're getting present dayy you know which is very satisfying. Nothing wrong with that. Nothing at all this message comes to us from just four days ago. Twiwatt family time, Quirtle time. Bonjour, mon dieux, Timothy, et Guy. Please pronounce as Guy.

I've been absorbing your lovely voices orally for years, but my ears were partially peaked recently when Guy mentioned his Quirtle prowess. I was a Quirtler back in the days of COVID and lockdowns, but fell off the bandwagon as I began to find it tiresome. That was until Guy mentioned his family's streak competition. I was unaware that Quirrell tracked win streaks and have now restarted my Quirrell journey with the sole goal. What's interesting about this, they've gone with sole, S-O-U-L. So this is like a spiritual goal of becoming's right. Of becoming the Montgomery family champion.

All right. So nice. That's exciting. I've already got 54 days under my belt, which means it's probably time I start figuring out the easiest way to join the family. So can you please advise if Guy and Chelsea are open to adopting me or I will need to marry my way into the family? Best wishes from your future son slash brother-in-law slash stepdad. Yes, I'll marry your mum tis, tis mon amie. Oh, I think mon amie. Cest, cest.

How do you say that in French? This is from Tom that last thing. C. C. Yeah. What does it mean? That is. It's Tom. Yeah. Tom, I've got to ask, I've already got 54 days under my belt. Does that mean you're on a 54 day streak on the Quirtle out the gate?

Because honestly, that is impressive to me and better than anything I've strung together. So does that mean successfully got it? Got the word for 54 days? Correctly, the four words. So remember the quartal, four simultaneous wordals. Oh yeah, quart, quad, quadrant, quarter. And so it's harder, it's a more intriguing challenge than the wordal.

And like putting together a 50 day streak on the quartal is- Do you get a streak just for doing it? Could it be that? You know, he might've done it 54 consecutive days, which is a weird thing to brag about. I think it's 54 successful solves. Don't take away from Tom's achievement. No, I...

His sole goal. I refuse to congratulate anyone, but like they could've got it wrong 54 days in a row. This is not impressive. You don't want to give a little participation trophy to Tom? No, but if Tom has done what I think he's done, which is successfully solved the Quirtle 54 days on the trot, if I can tip of the hat to you,

you are not coming into my family thread. Also, Chelsea is not in that thread. She refused to partake in our silly little parlor games, but I love you anyway, baby. For instance, my current streak is 31, and that's, you know, that's solid. We're happy with that. Hello, once again, Tim and Guy, this one isn't so much to be read aloud on the pod, but feel free if you want to use it to share the answer. Is there any way to make a one time momentary pledge to the pod?

Oh yeah, someone else asked about this recently too. Is basically the question. There used to be, I need to get it back. I'll get it, what I'll do with all the spare time I have is figure out how to get a Kofi going. I think that'll be the best way. This is what is mentioned here. They mentioned Kofi.

Cause we used to be able to get it on PayPal, but then they changed all the rules about how that bit works. Thanks for asking. We would love to get some money from you. Another message? Please. Or is there more to that?

Or is that kind of the cut and thrust of that one? Emily has written, hello boys. Oh, the subject line, bananas. And this comes to us. Wow. Today? Crazy. Pretty good.

Hello boys. I hope this is the right place to send this to. I've listened to every episode of everything you've done. First off, thank you. Legend. That's awesome. That's crazy. I feel... I almost feel guilty for that. I feel like we are holding you captive and by discussing more things and creating more podcasts, we are a problem in your life. Someone asked me recently how many episodes you and I have done of Worst Idea. I don't know the answer to that. I could probably go onto a computer and find out.

How many broadcasts we've done together? Yeah, it's over a thousand. Probably, that's crazy. Isn't it? Do you think, what about this, have we spent more hours as colleagues than friends? It's hard to, it's hard to seize out. I have a good time with you when we record.

So I can't bear this. It's not a, it's, you know, it's not a question of that, I agree with that. But I would say we've spent, we would have spent more time now in this contractually obligated time capacity. Then let's, let's, let's call it, um, uh, sort of voluntary time versus contractually obligated time. We've spent more contractually obligated time than voluntary time.

Yeah, I would say so. Definitely. Damn shame. Yeah. Well, yeah, it is. But, you know, we would talk about this very often in the very early days of the podcast, the point of the podcast, was to become friends. Like a big portion of it was to force a contractual obligation to hang. Because absent that, Yeah, we just wouldn't hang.

Is that still true now hard to say hard to say there's tons of people I'd love to hang out with that I don't hang out with impossible to pass but I get to see you that's true and it's lovely pass par se probably could have fun with that as a homophone so excuse me not on this podcast not in this climate so we are up to the person who has watched every, listened to everything we've done. I've had such a visceral experience of watching Sex in the City 2. I was in heaven to hear other people despise it. I unfortunately had never listened to Till Death Do Us Blart.

I'm currently on the fourth episode and I just want to reference the fact that you guys love the rotten banana joke. Cut to the new series of, and just that you guys love the rotten banana joke. Cut to the new series of and just like that and Harry's banana reference. I love weird universe connections and I think your affinity for banana humor is worth referencing. All the love possible, Emily. It gets even better than that Emily because you've probably consumed this episode already. I think it was a decade ago. So it wasn't We Are Your Friends? Was it Grown Ups 2? I think it was a decade ago so it wasn't we are your friends was it grown-ups 2 I think it was very very long ago yeah maybe it was grown-ups 2 it feels like it wasn't I don't think it was we are

your friends it feels to me I was looking after Matt Heath's apartment at the time which was weird so we watched it in there mm-hmm and you deep-throated a banana I think it's on your Instagram deep-throated a banana. I think it's on your Instagram. I think we could track back to find the specific date. I think it might predate my Insta. Dang. I think.

An ancient memory, but it was disgusting. I won't get into the why exactly. Suck my banana. Gamers used to play in high school. Who can deep-throat the banana the furthest? I used to be able to get basically the whole banana in. He's the throat gold guy Montgomery. Talked about it with Tim on the podcast.

He asked for a demo. Made myself bleed. I've lost it. End of. Oh, do you want to read that? Yep. It's an email. OK.

For us. Hi, guys. Also, update on the microphone arms. You know how I bought new ones? Mm-hmm. So they shipped and then were lost. Oh dude. Amazon sent me an email saying,

we think we've lost your package. Amazing, wouldn't buy a person or a computer? A computer, dude. Amazon don't have any people working there. I can't, you know what? I don't need to advertise my sort of desire to be a Luddite, but I can't handle when there's a problem occurs and you can't find a person to talk to about it. What a wholly original frustration.

I know. And it continues to this day. What do you do when the computer emails you? What do you do? There's nothing. Oh, well they say here's the process for applying for a refund because you're probably never going to get the thing you paid money for. Lucky, yeah. Lucky you get to apply for a refund. So good. Why would you process that? We love our techno overlords.

Shout out Jeff. And also congratulations on your... Nup... Yes, yeah. Yeah, right. You got it. Nup-tules? Yeah. Is that how you say it? Yeah. Is it...

Yeah. I've never known how to say that word. Nup-tules. You got it. Nu-pet-les. And on your new petals. Oh yeah. You've taken so long to get to the email.

I've got two waylaid. Here we go. And we'll call it after this, I think. Oh, okay. I got very short. I'll see if there's another email. This is a 10 minute episode right now. Who knows?

There's gold in these hills. What matters most to you? Is it unforgettable adventures? Connections with lifelong friends? Peaceful moments of reflection? Feelings of joy and freedom you can't wait to experience again and again? Or is it the vehicles that help you make all those

special moments possible? Whatever your answer is, Toyota is here to bring you closer to the things that matter to you. Because they matter to us too. Toyota, for what matters most. It's going to take 15 minutes to discuss this email. Okay. Hi Guy Guy and Dingbat said with affection.

Got me. The letter signed Sminy was not a name from a particularly obscure language, but rather a Twyowat specific reference. So this email is to say, I got you other listener. I understood. So someone signed a message recently with Sminy and we obviously tried to pass it. Yeah. And it's, and it was us. Yes.

Since I'm already writing to you too, I'd also like to suggest, particularly with the new season potentially in the works, a crossover episode with the only other podcast to reach anywhere near Twiowat's chaotic energy, Hey Riddle Riddle. It is a riddle and improv sketch comedy podcast, an example of their Twiowat compatibility as they made a joke about Penguin Baseball one episode, then brought back the idea a couple of months later, then another eight, I think I'm not checking the chronology months pass and they get their shit together just in time for April of the penguins, missing March of the penguins by one month. If not possible for legal reasons, a Hey Riddle Riddle takeover episode where Guy does Hey, Hey, Hey spelling spelling

would be beautiful. Regardless, love the pod been listed for many years and it's coming in clutch as my dad died last month, no condolences needed. And I'm clearing out his place of literally thousands of books, CDs, DVDs and records. Say my name, even if it isn't Beverly, Scooby Doo. What kills me here, and I don't wanna put work on our listeners is that you acknowledge a reference

that we made that we didn't remember or understand. You said, Hey, I got you on the listener. I know that. I guess my misunderstanding of what that might lead to is a definition and description of the reference that passed both of us by. But you know, Do you want another bite at the apple of another listener to come in and give us the full context.

It would blow me away if there was a third listener who knew what S M N E I I I meant. I mean, what's your best guess? No, I did not. Sminy. I mean, yeah, maybe that maybe. But what would it be? Sandler thing? Well, the yeah, the scuba door is very Sandler.

Yeah. Sminy. Sminny. Sminny does ring a bell now, actually. Yeah, no, I... We don't even know where to start. What chapter do you think it's from? Let's see how far off we are. What chapter of our...

Sex and the City 1, the movie, the film. What is the plot of Sex and the City 1, the movie, the film. What is the plot of Sex and the City 1, the movie, the film? Well, that's the one where Carrie and Big get married eventually. Carrie, no, Big jilts Carrie. Leaves her at the altar. That's right. And that is sort of the, you know, the propelling force of the film. And then they go on effectively a break

for the length of a feature film. And then at the end he buys her a ring. Where does she go? She goes to a holiday destination. She goes with the girl. She goes. I remember she looks at a body of water. She goes

Where does she go? They should be in there man. And what are the comedic beats of the movie? Now let's not get unfair on ourselves, but we should be able to remember the location that Carrie Bradshaw goes to After being jilted. I mean, let's do a little You know I mean, let's do a little, you know, information by deduction here. In Sex and the City 2, they go to Abu Dhabi. So it is probably in the first movie somewhere like a Western country, I'm guessing. Feels more European. Does she go to Europe?

Feels like more Mediterranean. I don't think she goes to Europe though. They go to Mexico. I think it's in Mexico. I don't think she goes to Europe though. They go to Mexico. I think it's in Mexico. I think you're right. I think she goes on the honeymoon. She goes on the honeymoon they planned. Which is in Mexico.

And she takes all of them. And that's what they're doing. Yeah. What's the point of tension when they're away? That's right because doesn't Miranda get fucking some mash-up. Which is kind of a nice little like dangling of the alcoholism thing. When does she do that? When they're at the, um, the place that was booked as the honeymoon.

The resort. I remember that they walk in and like, it's the, the honeymoon bed is always set up, you know, pedals. Yeah. Yeah. For the newly. I'm getting that. I'm getting that.

And, and that sets Carrie off. She runs off crying. And I think Charlotte might go and follow her. And then Samantha says something kind of diffusing and witty. And then we cut to another scene where they are at an outdoor pool of water altogether. Okay.

I think we're all having drinks at that point. I worry we're now crossing the streams with... Sex and City 2. Yeah. I don't think so. Because they spend some time having drinks in a pool. No, no, no, but there's a different thing in my head. In Sex and City 2, it's a big swimming pool

full of hot Australian rugby players. And in Sex and City 1, the pool of water is small, like a private little, you know, pool for your suite. A sweet pool for your sweet, a sweet pull. I've researched Sex and City. Some, some beats we're missing and have forgotten about. Erin, the nanny. Yeah.

They're all nanny, that Harry, uh, Erin go braless. Big gay wedding is that episode one? Is that Sex and City one? Big gay wedding is... The calm thing. It is. No. It must be. I mean, isn't this... No, it has to be. They can't, they can't, they can't, they can't in the same movie go, go to

Abu Dhabi and have a big gay wedding. They're incompatible. That is so true. Isn't this sludge our brain is turned into? So tracking through all of this. Yes. Where does Sminny fit in? Well, now I'm interested. Now do we are your friends. Go. Oh, this I feel way more straightforward about this. This one is Zach Efron is an aspiring DJ who works with Jarhead. They work in pools and they promote concerts with Johnny Depp and Squirrel.

And then they play a gig and he hits on Emily Radziakowski. And like they sort of get on, then he winds up hanging out with a professional DJ, James Reed from the Feelers. And then he starts in it. Wines up back at his place. Wakes up. Emily Radziakowski. And Zicol is on the way up.

Yep. James Reed's down. James Reed's on the way down. Zicol starts up an affair with Emily Radziakowski? They get in trouble with the professional DJ his music keeps going he gets a chance to open for him at a gig He plays like a series of iPhone recordings Are we ever gonna be better than this? You know the place goes wild she goes back to school or something. The movie is. Right at the end.

But crucially, you've missed that screw-all. ODs at a party they throw. He ODs dead. I treat it with the same level of seriousness and intensity that they do in the film. It would have been so funny. I will not do this. I'll put this on the record. I got that and I could follow the movie the whole way through.

We've got Patrick Schwarzenegger tattooed on both our butts because of growing ups too. That would be a hard one. Do you know what would be... Really? I'm remembering. Four guys trying to do it in the behind the scenes. Peter Tonto. Four guys have a day.

Basically, that is what it is. If we got a tattoo of Skrill, like an RAP Squirrel tattoo, that'd be very funny. I remember recently I did think that the actor who played Squirrel died because... No he reached out to us. ...Squirrel died in the movie. That was a different thing. There is a confusing parallel between talking to us and dying. Maybe they seem the same but they're different. Look, that's enough. Yeah.

What a thrill to go back in the time machine and revisit Memories Old as we head into a different kind of machine to create. A different kind of product. Yeah. With its roots very much in place. You won't see it for a while too, so don't get too excited.

We've still got lots of, and just like that, to get through. Crucial business. Six more episodes. Thanks everybody, we love you. And I would like to say on behalf of both Guy and I that if you are an Aries, this week, it's time for you to put yourself out there.

Stop shying yourself away from all the possibilities that the universe has for you. Take a risk, roll a dice, get your heart broken because maybe there's romance and good fortune waiting for you on the other side of that. And Chelsea if you're listening, who isn in Aries? I think Tim is not talking to you in that instance. Oh, he dies. It's the wildest idea It's the wildest idea all time