The Worst Idea Of All Time - Friendzone 117

Episode Date: March 13, 2021

Our friend Maureen is trying to get the fellaz on #TaskmasterNZ, we've got a hot new theme song and the podcast feed is an absolute nightmare on iTunes (and everywhere probably). Someone’s trying to hit Tim and Guy up for either drugs or a job in NZ and either way, they’re here to help!SUPPORT US ON PATREON: (patreon.com/TWIOAT)JOIN US ON FACEBOOK: (facebook.com/WorstIdeaOfAllTime)VISIT THE LITTLE EMPIRE PODCAST NETWORK: (littleempirepodcasts.com)MUSIC CREDIT: Tender Moonlight (facebook.com/TenderMoonlight)ART CREDIT: Tomas Cottle (sick-days.com) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Well, it's the friend zone with Tim and Guy. It's the friend zone. We're gonna have a good time. It's the friend zone with Tim and Guy because making friends is the best idea of all time. Friend zone. We're studying all time is what this is called. It is called the worst idea of all time. Tim. Yeah. I've got to tell you something. Yeah.

I've been engaged in a back and forth on Instagram. Go on. With an Instagram user. Let me adjust my microphone so I can get comfy. Because we don't have the regular setup. Sometimes I wonder, are we using social media, Tim? Yep, we are Wonder no more, we are using social media Don't worry about the second half of that

Anyway, he's this guy And his name's Brian And he's a musician He plays with a band And they have submitted to us And I was meant to tell you this before we started recording But we just started recording Oh that's on me, that's my fault really

No no no, it's cool No it's my fault, let's call a spade a spade And I actually forwarded it to you I believe How did you forward an Instagram message? Because I gave By email? A correspondent started on Instagram And then I said hey man When you got this track ready You email it to me Because I gave it. By email? A correspondent started on Instagram.

And then I said, hey, man, when you got this track ready, you email it to me. And then he emailed it to me. When did you email me this? Yesterday. Day before. This is good content. Very recently. Anyway, I can play it for you and for everyone.

No, no, no. Because I want to do it properly through the desk. Okay. Well, it's a new friend zone theme. And it fucking slaps okay cool uh see that that fader there can you join that one yeah you got it crank that up a bit um it's probably going to be too loud just keep your finger on it and let us see if this works I fucking love it I love Brian And I love the Shills

The Shills That's the band That was so good how good is their production value that's our new theme song how about it well that's a band that's a it's a full proper band doing our shit yeah so check out the shills and um probably on band camps if i was in a band and i wanted someone to check me out i would try and send them to band camp yeah same um and they can't keep running these these fee-free days as well, so maybe you'll hit one of those.

Absolutely. The Shills are a band from Boston, Massachusetts. I've heard of it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a popular place. Beantown. So thanks, Brian. Why is it called Beantown?

Because of Dunkin' Donuts and their deep love of Java. It's called Beantown because of donuts. Well, yeah. In America, the relationship between donuts and coffee is just inseparable. That's so true. That's so true. We don't have that in New Zealand. Not at all.

Donuts and coffee are two separate things. Totally different things. Very disparate and discreet. But in America, always together. There's not even really a donut culture here. There is, but it's very bougie. Is there? Yeah, I reckon.

Or it's kind of diet. It was here like a year ago, maybe. I remember when we got a Krispy Kreme at Auckland Airport. Oh, that's your mass market donut operation. And everyone was like like fuck yeah you can buy donuts at the airport and like people were flying with huge bags of donuts from auckland to all around new zealand absolutely i've traveled from afar with this delectable delicacy i have brought the foods of my homeland to share with you this bounty crispy cream to their credit have cracked something yeah their donuts are

fucking good yeah yeah don't you reckon they're like at the risk of putting advertiser content that we're not getting paid for after we've been burned so severely by blaze pizza fuck i don't know who's on social media for blaze pizza but they've been having a hard couple of weeks at work you're not letting them get away with it either the shit they've been tweeting out has been hot garbage that has been terrible hasn't it and does that speak to blaze pizza's customer base that it's actually perfect for them or are they just missing the mark do you think i'm imagining some 19 year old angeleno who hasn't left their house properly for a year yeah who has to like keep this sunny upbeat disposition of like I'm a pizza company but I'm

Hey uh, welcome to Friday, it's pizza day A pizza company but presented as your most exciting friend. It's a fucking impossible existence. Everyone's losing their minds the apocalypse is unfolding in not so slow motion around you and all

you are supposed to do is send out pizza tweets for Blaze. Your tweet's written as a very positive pizza. It is an absurd statement. If the Biden administration doesn't get those $1200 stimulus checks out in the next couple of days, I'm homeless.

But let's have pizza. How about a flash fried margarita to celebrate? Wink emoji? Anyway, they're working hard. What the fuck's going on with everyone's down on the laugh-cry emoji at the moment? Oh, really? Yeah, you're kind of off social media broadly, eh? I was for two months, and then March happened, and I've fallen right back into the trap. March madness, they call it, because it's where Monty gets back on the Twitter pipe.

I mean, and I'm tweeting out. I feel like my sole goal with Twitter now is to tweet out the most benign, worthless. It's really annoying me, but they get a lot of, it's getting good hate. You tweet shit out now and I see it and you're getting like some good retweets and likes on there and I'm like, this sucks. Well, Mon into the world it sucks but it's kind of good because it's deliberately

undermining the thing it is i got in a twitter fight with someone yesterday just a light row um because they were being a pedant and getting me up on like my spelling and things like that i don't think i've ever seen to tweet out without a spelling error or a significant grammatical error in it. And he was bloody, you know. I was trying to make a point. I'd misspelled some words. He was having me up on that. So I just started sending Simpsons

gifs in reply to his big long tweets to me and boy it was riling him up. Oh, it was like, oh, a fucking Simpsons meme gift the last refuge for a person who doesn't have an argument then i just sent back millhouse's eyebrows do they follow you probably not anymore what this is like i can't tell you how much more mentally clear and healthy i felt when i was away from this website i understand trolling

because there's a math to it right yeah it's about how much energy can i get you to to expend for the smallest amount of energy for me to expend that's what trolling is yeah it's going like what is the fewest syllables characters what's the lowest energy thing that I can throw into the world to elicit the biggest energetic response from others? Case in point, Rob Schneider's special. Yeah. Asian Mama, Mexican Kids. Yeah.

You know what that name means? Yeah, I do now. Yeah, that's right, you do. And we don't need to talk about it. Oh, is it just the title? Yeah, yeah. Or are you going to talk about the special at large? No, no.

Because it didn't look very worked on. But then it didn't get a very big response i was more thinking about trolling my asking you about the title or explaining it to you that is that's it fits your definition of trolling a classic troll yeah i i this is not worth it but on i i i the greatest thing don't say this isn't worth it on a podcast guy this is the most i think i think every podcast should start with this isn't worth it it is implicit in the medium don't ever say it out loud i see this is a secret that we keep from our listeners exactly hey tim yeah i hope this isn't going into the mic hey tell me a great idea you've got in your brain what's what are you thinking?

Me? No, what were you about to say? Oh, I was just going to say the funniest articulation and example of trolling I've heard recently was on Alan Partridge's podcast, Alan Partridge from the Oast House, where he's dealing with a troll

on Twitter called High Noon. And it's just like a perfect, perfect piece of comedy that distills exactly what you've been describing. So I'm plugging another podcast on the podcast platforming Audible that you have to fucking pay for. Zoe was watching my wife.

Thanks for asking. I'm married. Very nice. Yeah, true that. She was watching Marie Antoinette the other day. With Kirsten Dunst. Yeah, the Coppola one. And I forgot, but old mate's in there.

Partridge? Yeah. Wow. What's his fucking name? Steve Coogan. Steve Coogan. Who's George Coogan? No one.

Yeah, yeah. He's in there as like an aristocrat, some French aristocrat. How was the movie? Did you watch it or was it just Zoe? You know what, man? I didn't really get it. I loved. It moves so quick. Yeah scene to scene and it to

me therefore just feels very frivolous and i'm just i'm a boring person so i would prefer to know about you know like the actual what's going on with the people the the kind of like social dynamics of this historic moment which i know has been covered the whole point of that movie is like everyone talks about that so we're gonna do this thing where we present marie antoinette kind of through her own eyes having a good version of it partying with contemporary rock music to kind of like give it this modern feel so you can relate to her and you're like you've missed an opportunity here for a period time piece what about the learning information yeah what about the whiteboard we're so different in this respect yeah like that's what makes this work i think

chalk and cheese you know what i'm watching right now this is a weird thing for me to be watching just anachronistically no one's asking for it silicon valley from the top oh wow the the popular hbo mike judge tv show yeah which i think like one and a half people have been cancelled from. Yeah, I think that sounds like the right number. And then while that was happening, Kumail Nanjiani was at the gym being like, you're not going to cancel me. I had to look up last night.

I was like, it is the same guy, right? This is the same guy. It's incredible. One of the first things I saw when I went back on Twitter was a photo his wife had tweeted out of him being very muscly in front of some cakes and i was like this is all everything's wrong everything's wrong everything's wrong do you know i don't know if i if i should say this definitely not on a podcast but i will um tj miller because he's been kind of cancelled a

big time he's been almost proper cancelled Oh is that Not all the way to the ground I don't know the particulars of it Well this is This is not great But he He serves a good purpose in that show

Yes Like in terms of I don't think he's acting very much I think it's who he is And he's Pretty deplorable Yeah But like

In a very entertaining way Yes There was a real I mean Silicon Valley's pretty recent But that was like in a very entertaining way. Yes. There was a real, I mean, Silicon Valley is pretty recent, but that was like, there was a whole comedy market for that. People wanted to watch grown men.

Yeah. Like, you know, very quick witted assholes. Yeah. It's amazing though. Even that show as recent as it was, it is like stark,

the lack of women on it. Yeah. It's like one female character for all of season one it's crazy well it's sort of it's holding up a mirror isn't it to the uh to the valley itself well there's other people there you know any who's it's good to be in the zone with my friend guy it is i've got um i got the facebook here worst idea of all time when i when i clicked over to go to the worst idea of all time part of it, it said you are now interacting as the worst idea of all time.

And I think that's a fun coat of armor to put on. I can't be held responsible for any of this. I'm the worst idea of all time. I'm not Guy Montgomery. I've got license to say

or do whatever I so please. Give me some hot takes, man. Well, I'll say this to you. Dear good boys, I'm an Aussie who moved to the US not long before the pandemic. Whoops.

G'day, Brucey. I'm going to assume their name is Brucey. Yeah, fair enough. And you two have kept me going through months of one-person lockdown and other questionable life choices by being the magnificent boys you are. I discovered you late last year when on another podcast, James Acaster answered the question, what's the worst movie you've ever seen with Sex and the City 2?

I started listening and never stopped for at least three months, partly because I love you and partly because your feed on Apple Podcasts is so confusing that I was scared I'd never find my current episode if I tried to listen to anything else. It's chaos. The Honey Trap. You've got to love it. I'm all caught up now and just paid the boys via PayPal.

Thank you for existing, you glorious fucking idiots. If you read this on a friend zone, feel free to say my name in a sensual whisper. Sensual. Fiona. Hey, Fiona. Thanks, Fiona.

And thanks, James Acaster, a guest who, I guess, used our podcast as a launching pad to international superstardom and success. Okay. I really should sort that feed out at some stage. I'll put it on the pile. Maureen Johnson.

I know Maureen. Maureen's written to us. I like Maureen. This is a recent email that I've put to the top of the pile for a specific reason. Okay. I usually don't pre-read them, but I saw it come from Maureen. I was like, oh, better read this one. But it is scripted in true, like, you know, friend zone fashion.

Yeah. My dear boys. She is a writer, so that would make sense. No, but, you know, it's not like, hey, Tim, or like, hey, guy. It's, you know, hey, this is for the friend zone. Format friendly. Exactly. Rough and ready.

I've been a long time fan. I've been with you for years now. I was first introduced to you by the creators of Welcome to Night Vale, who relentlessly encouraged me to listen, explaining the premise and adding, they're starting to turn on each other. I don't think they're okay. That was enough for me, and I subscribed at once.

They were right. You were not okay. I worried when Tim went to a party and sucked back a vial of something simply called party drugs and when Guy fell off the top of a caravan and soiled himself. I listened to 5 Hour Energy on repeat when I was stranded in a faraway city

due to a massive snowstorm and was waiting for a flight home. Naturally, I've been in attendance at all of your New York shows. I remember fondly meeting you for the first time at the Bell House when you disappeared immediately after the show for no longer than one minute and in that time managed to get completely baked. When you returned, Guy yelled jokes at the top of my skull

while Tim nervously tried to continue business-like chatter. It was everything I'd hoped for. At one point, I was even supposed to be on an episode i remember this distinctly guy was about to come to my apartment um when we had to cancel uh when we had a household emergency and i had to cancel i was bitterly disappointed but there was nothing i could do we come to watch the first sex in the city movie i prepared notes you boys had questions about New York publishing, and I had answers.

For example, you asked if it was acceptable for authors to go into bookstores and move their books to the front of the shelf or to prominent places on the shelves. I have this information. It's been a hell of a year, boys. Still not sharing it. No, we've got to get her on an episode. Yeah, Maureen, you dirty dog.

It's been a hell of a year, boys, but I am glad to know that you're in New Zealand, the one place that seems to be doing anything right. Here in New York City, we have, for all intents and purposes, been in full lockdown for a year. The most exciting thing happening right now in our neighbourhood is that a new restaurant is about to open and we will soon be able to look in the windows and never go inside.

It will just be nice to have something new to see. This means that we have been mining our television content. We've recently found and started watching the New Zealand version of the UK television show Taskmaster. Aye. I was glad to have more Taskmaster to watch, but confused and disappointed to see that it does not feature the boys. It is my understanding that you are the premier comedy duo

of your island nation and while everyone on the show is excellent two of the people on it are brothers this seems to indicate that they may be short of participants to this end i have a proposal what if we your legions of fans relentlessly petitioned the makers of taskmaster nz to include the boys in the next season if we did this and succeeded would you consider doing a second run of the city watches this would be a new chapter in your research going back for a sequel there's so much more to mine from the material and more to discover about yourself at all and more to discover about yourselves that's true i believe it um i know that we as your fans could do this i know you've tried crowdsourcing support in the past hashtag pay the boys but i don't think you understand what an organized campaign of worst idea fans can accomplish what do you say

remember many of us are not living in new ze Zealand and have been inside for a long time. Think of the joy you would provide for those of us who have not been out for a year. How are Carrie and the gals doing lockdown? Please consider this proposal. Say my name if you like and leave it out if you don't. Your friend, Maureen. Real poison pill from Maureen there. Look, you know.

I say do it. You say do it. Onward with the campaign Yep, do it Why not? They won't put us on I don't think they'll put us on No I'd be shocked if they did, to be honest

There's a lot of very good comedians in New Zealand And only five available slots Yeah Incredible that it's even I mean, I don't know that Maureen's followed the funding grounds of New Zealand television so closely. I guess you probably don't. But the timing of the campaign coincides perfectly

with the announcement that it's happening. The second season, yeah. Which is, I mean, in and of itself, a huge triumph for New Zealand television. We do not like funding second seasons for anything. What we do is we apportion a tiny amount of the budgets we have to see people realize an idea and then when the idea doesn't find its feet immediately and not enough people watch it they say never again enough oh it didn't work it's like yeah

you gave me one tenth of the money i asked for to make this show and there was no marketing for it yeah the numbers were bad yeah but we found this other show we're going to fund to the tune of one tenth of a proper budget and so and the cycle continues and they become so confused and they wring their hands and they say we don't understand why tv's dying in this country oh god as they chase themselves to the bottom with broader and broader format as people who have already gone to the trouble of going to America and failing to make TV over there, who better to turn your hand to in New Zealand to successfully help or fail make television here than the boys?

Absolutely. If it's going to not work anyway, why shouldn't we be on it? And actually, Taskmaster Season 1 did, in my humble opinion, did work. It was really good. Yeah, it did work. But if you want us to stink up the joint I think the hashtag is TaskmasterNZ Fill your boots and if you succeed We will

We'll wear Blaze Pizza merch on the show We won't what No I'm not going to finish articulating the thought Because the idea of watching any more Sex and the City 2 is sickening it's good stakes it removes all the joy

from doing something that you would love and isn't that quintessentially us but I don't want it to be. I was genuinely lost for words. They really were. You're all at sea. Um,

so I am going to read out a tweet, a tweet, a Twitter message, a DM. You're all right, mate. Yeah, I'm fucking all right. Send a twio at pod at twio at pod. A Twitter message A DM You alright mate? Yeah I'm fucking alright Send a Twiowatpod

At Twiowatpod By the way The Twitter account is It's a great time If you're on Twitter But you don't follow the podcast Get amongst it We send out tweets

We have a lot of fun doing it T-W-I-O-A-T-P-O-D All one word Like I said Twiowat Howdy boys I just listened to the Friendzone 109 So this is a time traveller This person wrote this So A.T. Pot or one word. Like I said, Twiwet. Howdy, boys. I just listened to The Friend Zone 109. So this is a time traveler.

This person wrote this. This is a time traveler. Very good. Where are they from, Guy? The past, clearly. Where you talk about the comedian in Wellington who uses tautology in her jokes. Oh, this was, we're talking about Clarissa Chandrahassan, who had the iconic as ASAP as possible line. Oh my God.

I don't remember this conversation. Are we just paying out local comedians or is it for great comic effect? Championing. Great. Okay. Championing comedians and the use of tautology. Right. Some of my favorite ones to use generally in an online context, but once in a while in person, if I'm feeling extra zesty, I SMH my head.

And RIP in peace, piss, or pieces. Hope you boys are staying frosty as you crest the summer months. And if you read this on the friend zone, make sure you say my motherfucking Twitter name, I guess. This isn't my real name. And that is from Bob the ice climber i've got two big beefs in life one is people saying am in the morning and the other one is when a movie takes a piece of footage that was shot at a normal frame rate and slows it down to slow motion. These are the two things I can't stand. Apart from that, I'm a pretty easygoing guy.

Pretty specific issues you take. Both sort of time-related in a funny way. Yeah. Do you feel you have enough time, Tim? No. I'm pretty convinced I won't be on the planet for very long. I really feel like I've slowed down the amount of stuff I'm getting done recently as well, which is bad. Do you think you're

a third through your life? Easily. Half? I'd say more than half. Wow. Yeah. I've always had that feeling. What's your end goal? The goal? The goal is to disrupt the fates and outlast

what was preordained, but I've just got a feeling I won't be here for very long. The winds of fate blow true. That's alright. I've had a fabulous run. I've had a great life. Dead to my guy. Jesus Christ. I've been listening for a long time, but wanted to

write in to say thank you for all you do. You guys have been my companions through these years which distinctly lack precedent. Your spirals into madness during the first four seasons make it feel i shouldn't have gulped right into the mic that was gross you did the right thing yuck first four seasons make me feel a little better about my descent into madness and quarantine and your master plans on your secret patreon podcast make me feel much better about the future of our global economy. Basically, you two make me laugh, and that isn't easy these days. That isn't always easy these days.

Guy, I wanted to say I'm sorry that the U.S. was a huge disappointment for you. Was it? Could you repeat that? Sorry, I was reading ahead. That's okay. Guy, I wanted to say that I'm sorry that the US was a huge disappointment for you. If it makes you feel any better, it's also a huge disappointment for everyone living here. This place is a fucking hellscape right now.

I'm actually a bit relieved you got out before the plague hit, though the country is worse off without you. That's sweet. I hope you are able to do as much stand-up as your big heart desires now that you're back safe at home. Do you want to respond to that while we're mid-mess? Well, if you were a stand-up comedian, the best place to get to perform live in the world right now

would be New Zealand, arguably. In theory. We just got locked out for a week. I lost four gigs. No, five. I lost three. Two of them were orientation week gigs at universities. No, five. I lost three. Two of them were orientation week gigs at universities. Oh, fuck.

Are they not getting rescheduled? Not that I've heard. God damn it, guy. It's a real, you know. But you can't complain, can you? No, exactly. Everyone's learned it this year. I thought I built my house of sturdy materials,

but it turns out, wait, this steel's made from cars. And this foundation is made from sand. That's right. Tim, I don't have as much of a heartfelt message for you, but I hope Zoe and Rufus are doing great. Are they doing great? They're both doing great. Rufus gave me a hero's welcome when I came over this morning.

Don't knock on the door. It sets them off. I mean, your appearance will set him off anyway, but knocking, that's surefire. My appearance is in my arrival or my appearance is in the way I look? Your arrival, but maybe both. You're pretty tall.

You're very intimidating for such a tiny dog. Do you think I should start crawling into your house? You can't grovel to him. Get on his level. I'm super proud of you for getting into politics. It sounds like you're really doing some great work out there.

Really sorry to hear about the weed referendum, though. That's a huge setback and super disappointing. But you're still making a positive change in the world and that's amazing. Wow.

Thank you, writer. Hey, speaking of marijuana and getting the fuck out of America, I'm finishing up my welding certification soon and heard you guys have a trade shortage. Low key. If I move to Wellington, can y'all hook me up?

I'll take my answer off the air if you prefer. Too late for that. In exchange, I'll make you some metal art. What are your favorite animals? I hope this all makes sense. I've proofread it eight times, but sorry to rub salt in the wound. Weed is legal where I am

and I am currently exercising that right as i write this two different yeah yeah yeah anyways love you guys lots keep doing what you're doing and i hope you have a beautiful day you can say this part of my name love ray she her ps when y'all were in chicago last year I saw you guys and you were amazing I'd worked a long shift before the show though I was too tired to really talk to you but I did pay Guy one US dollar for his notes from your

50% viewing of Sex and the City just wanted to let you know I found a nice frame and it sits on my dresser that's so lovely thank you for accepting my bid that's so absurd to me. It's swag. Yeah, that's a great deal.

So, um. For me. The trade shortage. I don't know what's going on there. I don't know a lot about it, but if you get to Wellington and you ask five people on the street who aren't dressed in police uniforms

if they know where you can get some weed. I don't think that I think it was more for the job oh you want us to hook you up with a trade job I think so oh mate

if it's weed that's easy if it's a job give us a yeah if this plan starts to firm up I'll ask around

I think ask around you say hey are you hiring any welders and the first person who says yes you go also are you selling any weed

oh I reckon people who work in like panel beaters and that sort of stuff, they've fucking got the hookups. Yeah. I mean, we did vote against legalizing cannabis in the referendum. It hasn't slowed anyone down. No, yeah. Incredibly, people continue to smoke weed in spite of most of the country telling them that they don't agree with it.

Strangely, this very agreeable plant that grows so vociferously, the nickname for it is weed, the lack of legal accommodation for it has not slowed down the consumption or growth of it. Incredible to make it illegal, isn't it? You were telling me it's the 50-year anniversary of the war on drugs? In June. In June. In mid-June. Incredible to think.

Largely based on racism and largely responsible at the hands of one man. His name is Aslinger. I'm saying it wrong. Aslinger? Aslinger. What country do they live in? I've forgotten his first name. It sounds German to me, but he's American.

He was born just before the turn of the 20th century. I see. 1893, I think. A very traumatic experience as a child, and then took it out on the world and got drug prohibition. I understood. Harry. That's his name, Harry Headslinger.

Part of the reason that weed was made illegal was because hemp derivatives were threatening to... Take over cotton? Yeah. I think that might have been part of it. It was after the cotton gin got invented. Did you know that cotton gin is a contraction of cotton engine? No.

Because it's a device that could mechanically do the work. It's actually quite hard to separate out cotton when you're doing it by hand. But when the cotton gin got invented, a little more money flowed into that industry and they started taking over other stuff. I think it was a lot of compounding factors. The main one guy? Racism.

Yes. Overwhelmingly so. Against Mexicans. You hate to hear it. You fucking do. You really do. Okay. I've got the... Actually, do you know... What's the timer on that thing you do. You really do. Okay. I've got the,

I actually, do you know? What's the timer on that thing you say? It's just 29. Whoops. Do you want to leave? Do one. I was going to say I don't have one.

Oh. I've caught up. Oh shit. Okay. Sort of, I mean, as I say that. I'm up to November on the emails.

As I say that, I am certain that there will be people screaming into their headphones saying you're not caught up. You haven read x y or z yeah that's very true but by my calculations and math have we got a good system going for the dms and the facebook messages like do you feel like we're we're not missing i think i think not a lot gets through the the net i mean like the thing is that there are there is some correspondence here that is not it's not specifically for a friend zone but it's just some fun fan theory. Yeah, yeah.

This is from Twitter user Clem, and it reads as follows. Theory. Mr. Big is Charlie Kelly from Always Sunny's father. So you're familiar with Always Sunny in Philadelphia? Sure am. So exhibit A. Charlie doesn't know who his father is, but we do know both Charlie and Mr. Big are illiterate. Correct. Exhibit A. Charlie doesn't know who his father is, but we do know both Charlie and Mr. Big

are illiterate. Correct. Exhibit B. Much like his father's big book of ideas, Charlie Kelly keeps a dream journal that's full of mad scribblings and ideas, and then they've attached screenshots as evidence. Because didn't he write the Nightman musical in pictures, eh?

Have you seen that episode? Yeah, yeah, yeah. God damn it. That is an all-timer just in any television show exhibit c they do kind of look alike exhibit d charlie wants a boat to do shrimping and catch uh and catches river crabs mr big enjoys deadliest catch oh yeah true i rest my case your honors the only problem arises in the crossover with the fact charlie kelly is dubbed the King of Rats

and is known for raticide. Brady wouldn't be happy. Yeah, but it's like crossover. It's like rubbing off on. That's pretty good. I love that. Pretty good. Should we make that canon?

Yeah. And then we've also got at the moment a lot of people sending us a link to John Cleese and Rob Schneider's new film. I saw that immediately when that got announced. Finally, the dream team of comedy. Exactly. That's what I thought too.

The two voices that I'm desperate to see an adaptation of a hilarious Australian historical event from. I think actually we've had a version of this conversation before, but who's climbed higher and who's fallen further? Like, is John Cleese doing worse than Rob Schneider is doing better? Have we talked about this? I might be just having deja vu. Yeah, maybe you are. I might be just having deja vu. John Cleese.

Has fallen. Absolutely. Because, like. He was at the very top And if he'd stopped He would have stayed there forever Is Michael Palin dead? No he's still gone Terry Jones

But Michael Palin because he pivoted into the travel show thing Like 20 years ago He's all good That's a stellar career. I read one of his diaries, and he genuinely just seemed like a lovely, hardworking, funny, friendly family man. And he's a fabulous writer as well. I haven't read his stuff, but is that book good?

Yeah, I mean, you're literally charting the diaries of Monty Python's trajectory and his part inside of it. And you get to experience the inner workings of how the creative partnerships inside of it and you know you you get to experience the inner workings of how the the creative partnerships inside of it worked he wrote with terry jones um and john cleese i believe predominantly wrote with graham chapman solo solo i don't know no i'm just making shit up uh but anyway i just imagine john cleese even before he got into like kind of cancel culture politics stuff will probably have been quite a cantankerous personality. You remember he got reviled in New Zealand for something he said,

which I actually thought was kind of funny. Do you remember what it was? Called Invercargill the asshole of the earth? He did that, but it was another one. Oh, what was the other one? It was when he performed in Palmerston North, and he said, if someone is thinking about taking their own life,

but they can't quite push themselves over the edge, a trip to Palmerston North should do the trick. See, it's such a like, it's one of those basic gags of just paying out of shit town, but it's done with such a plum. Yeah, it's done with panache. Alright folks, that's going to do it for the friend zone. Hope you've had a good time.

I sure have. Please keep sending stuff in if you've got anything to say. If've got anything to say our facebook page and our twitter um thank you very much for being our friend we hope that you're happy and healthy wherever you are and we've got an announcement next week oh amazing do we do i know what it is yeah do we talk about it this morning yes oh yeah yeah, cool And huge thank you to The Shields For the fantastic new theme song Hell yeah That you can look forward to loving

And then eventually just being used to And then hating And then maybe hating Or some Actually no, do you know what? Some podcast themes I'm like, every time I'm like, this is

I'm safe now Yeah Welcome to the friend zone In the friend zone You're always home now.