The Worst Idea Of All Time - REPLAY: S02E32 - Tokyo Drift

Episode Date: September 30, 2025

THESE EPISODES WERE RECORDED 10 YEARS AGO, PLEASE FORGIVE US OUR TRESPASSESGuy and Tim are in LA doing a live record during the #Audible LA Podcast Festival 2015. AND WHAT AN EPISODE! Guy talks masturbating to Lizzie McGuire, Tim's theory on where cheese comes from (again), the Grown Ups/Sex and The City cross over, random audience member's opinion on whether or not we're comedy geniuses (spoiler: we are) and all the Brady-loving, Mr Big Idea-ing, Shining Lighting, Coffee Guying updates you know and love.Support the boys on their modern-day adventures at twioat.substack.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello, friends. As we put the finishing touches on our next exciting adventure for you, we thought it was the perfect time to replay our second season of the podcast where we watch Sex and the City 2 every week for a year, hot off the back of the tragic news that and just like that will not be returning. Please enjoy. It's the worst idea of all time It's the worst idea of all time It's the worst idea of all time Season two Hello

Holy smokes, people arrived You know this isn't Greg Proops' one, eh? That's right. This is our one. Nor never, you are aware of what room you are in room that is indisputably a fire hazard So welcome along. How's everyone doing?

How you doing out in the crowd there tonight, live audience? I would like to welcome you all to the worst idea of all time a podcast in which myself Timbat and that's when you chime in. And myself, Guy Montgomery. We watch and review sex in the city two every week for a calendar year and we just watch sex in the city two for the 30th time. Hey all.

That's right. It's a lot More than is necessary It's also obviously we're in a room With live human beings And arguably a few Androids Very well disguised As it stands

But if you are listening to this in audio This would fall I think 30 second In the canon of episodes So it's the 30th watch But it's the 32nd episode Because of certain contractual Nonsense is going on So this is sort of, it's the Tokyo Drift

of worst idea of all time. Yeah, exactly. It's the perfect analogy. This episode, actually, I'm going to name it Tokyo Drift now. So this is the one that comes two after, and you guys in this room right now are the first people to know this,

two after the Paul F. Tompkins episode, which we're recording tomorrow night. Which is it, while exciting, we appreciate the applause, does mean we'll be watching this two consecutive days. But we should be talking about this in the past tense, because this is being released in the future.

So we need to like... Much like back to the future, we need to keep our timelines in check. So PFT, wasn't he great? Yeah? Wasn't he the best guest we've had so far? Presumably, he could tank it. It's confusing.

Statistically, it's unlikely, but the guy could really have a bomb. He's due, right? Six years of hits, the guy is due to fuck one up. Sounds like you want old PFT to take a bit of a tumble, man. I would like, it would make, just didn't know he's model.

It would feel good. Find the chink in the armour of sex in the city. So, as it stands, obviously, one of my first points of order is to address the circumstance in which we have watched and are discussing the film. Oh, yeah. We're in Los Angeles. We're in Los Angeles. I forgot to mention that. We're in L.A. for the audible, hashtag audible, audible, L.A. podfest.

Hashtag audible. Hashtag, can you hear me? hashtag am iaudible.com and this is the first and I'm going to go out in a limb and assume last time that Audible have helped us bring this episode to you because they're a big fish

and we are using tiny rods. Do you know what service I've heard a lot of good things about but I'm yet to experience? Mr. Biggs jiscusis limited? Yeah, yeah. I've had a lot of good things about Mr. Big's jiscusis. What have you heard? Well, secondably, I've heard

if you really want to enhance your Mr. if you want to enhance the experience of sitting in room temperature, semen runoff, for an hour. The best way to do that is to accompany it with a lovely audiobook provided by audible.com. I'll bet

Amazon spin-off audiobook services never had a more spicy run-in than that. That's right. Seamen runoff in a spark at room temperature, transitioning nicely into a family-friendly product that everyone can enjoy in the household. For whatever reason, if you find yourself

in one of Mr. Biggs jiscusis against your will, But you still have access to some sort of internet or device. A good way to enhance what is otherwise a pretty bleak mood, presumably. Hold on. Would be to listen to an audiobook as provided by the great people at audible.com. I don't want to dwell on this for too long, but why do they have to be in the jascuzzi against their will?

I'm just saying, such is the power of audible, that you might find yourself held in a spa filled with whatever against your will. Very well. But such as the brilliance of the service provided, by the good people at audible.com hashtag blaze pizza that you very

may well find yourself enjoying Asparagins you will on account of the great range of over 180,000 audiobooks You got it, you got it buddy I don't even have the screen in front of me I know this stuff There's leading audiobook publishers broadcasters, entertainers such as ourselves we've actually read an audio book

Why don't you try talking like a human instead of a word document Why don't you see what that feels like? Nah It makes me feel glamorous if I'm reading it like a robot, you know? Glamorous. I like the show's really got a bit of sparkle to it. Glamorous sounds suspiciously like glamor puss,

which is a word I'm trying to get off the ground at the moment. Like a glamorous pussycat, you know? I'm not shut up about it. Like a pussy cat with a diamonte collar. Go to audible.orgible.com slash L.A. Podfest. This is a custom hashtag. Custom 4 slash L.A. Podfest. You know, we're heavy hitters.

Yeah. You could get a great book like Julia Cameron's Reflections on the artist's way. Yeah, what do you think of that book, Tim, that you are familiar with and have even read the blurb of. It's in my to-do, that's for sure. And you get a 30-day free trial, and I'm pretty sure a free book. Yeah, one free audio book. So get that in you. That was a good plug. Was it? Yeah, to all the, to the quality control people are, what is it, audible? Audible.com. Yeah. Well, we're off script now, bud. All right. There's no safety net anymore. So, let's get into it

sex in the city too what did you think you know I'm still waiting for the tide change Tim but I'm still not a big sex in the city too guy it'll happen for you you got to have the faith

like the logic logic would suggest there has to be some moment at which it becomes more tolerable but do you mean within one watch or within our journey of multiple-wise.

Yeah, I think, yeah, either, both potato, tomato. What I'm saying is, like, with grown-ups too, there was some point, like, along the way in which we wound up thinking, hey, you know what, this isn't the worst way to spend an hour and 40 minutes. And I think accordingly, like, it hasn't happened yet, but I do think that we are due to actually enjoy ourselves at some point. I think the relationship with grown-ups too is complicated, though, because we recognized that what Adam Sandler had done was

create a business. He was a jobs creator. The dude's making movies and he's just a jobs creator. So you meant to tell me the only time you enjoyed grown-ups too when you thought of the good that Adam Sandler was sewing in the world. I feel like that coloured a lot of it because we kind of contented on to the fact

a bit later in the piece that this was basically him just helping out his friends and his family be paid. And charging everyday humans for the privilege. But that's okay because if you charge a million people, what do you pay for tickets here for the flicks. Twelve bucks. Is it about right?

You charge a million people 12 bucks. You know how many bucks that is? 12 million. You got it. So you're only inconveniencing people a little bit, but what he gets to give to, you know, David Spade. Yeah. We'll, I mean,

I would like to think I'm not alone in waking up in a cold sweat around 3 a.m. worrying about David Spade's financial stability. I'm clever on the same page with that. But sex in the city, too. Sex and the Titty Tee. There's a spin-off in the making.

Michael Patrick King he's in it for himself. And then, SJP, there's a lot of cynicism that this film's been built with, you know? At least S&LOW is helping people out, but I don't think old SJP was having anyone. No, you've got to, like, look at the people who are on the Foley, who are dressing

the Mizon scene. That is a diamond on the CV, this film. You've got a lot of active audio work and you've got a lot of great set dressing and I did things as I was watching you know a lot of the sedrette they treated this thing like a salad and they were putting

all of the sauces on right you know what I'm saying? Yeah this balsamic ranch those don't go together whatever just plug it in no there's a good analogy because much like a salad this meal of a film has no substance is that you're waiting for the steak

and it never arrives it's just like oh fuck okay another leaf of lettuce or spinach or whatever We are going to create this meal metaphor, which we are doing. And Michael Patrick King is the hilariously discombobulated chef in the kitchen, just grabbing disparate contents going, no, we can do this, we can pull it off. Trading on reputation in a restaurant which has been past its use by date for over 10 years. Still holding on to the Mitchell and Stars, though.

Digging up Parmesan from the back of the fridge, just putting it on in the hope that someone won't think, Wow, this Parmesan. I mean, you know, even new Parmesan tastes a little bit like vomit. Yeah. That's the funny thing about Parmesan, though. If it's new and fresh, it tastes like vomit, but if it's old, it tastes like cheese.

You don't have a great track record with knowing what cheeses taste like or are what. Whatever, man. Whatever. Strong comeback. Strong speculative comeback. Is this because of the Hulumi incident? because you're not convinced

that Hulumi comes from really old Feta. Feta. No. Goat's milk. I'm not. And I put it to the esteemed cheese eaters of the room. Of whom there are at least ten. Here's the timeline of milk though. It's milk and then you leave

it on the bench and it's cream and then you leave it on the bench and it's curdles and you get the way that you use and some stuff and then you leave it a little more and it becomes a soft cheese. When you go to the supermarket, Tim, they sell these things individually. Yeah.

So you don't need to buy milk and wait. You can go on and buy all of these different things. I know, because the supermarket's done it for me. Yeah. I don't need to buy and wait for it to turn into Hulumi. That's what I'm paying for. What do you think the business model of a supermarket is? They get a lot of milk.

They get a lot of milk. We're in the dairy aisle, for sure. They get a lot of milk. And then they just have various staging areas where it's been lying around for six months, nine months, 12 months. You think a supermarket is like a science fair where they are selling products as they finish.

Yeah. Okay. It's a commercial enterprise and what you're paying for is that you don't have to wait around on your own time to like wait for your fetter to turn into Hulumi. I'm amazed that for such a fan of cheese I'm having to explain this to you right now. I'm a little...

I was... I came in confident I'm leaving uncertain. I took notes this watch, guy. Can I kick off with my shining light just to put us on a positive little

hop in our step. I really like the structural integrity of the wedding cake because the wedding cake looks like it's been created by some sort of

architect where it's multi-tech there's about six tiers on it that you can see and one tier is they're all kind of off-cented

and it's got the sticks that hold them up which traditionally would go through the middle of a cake it's like one's right here on the left and then the one on the next

is way on the right and it just evens out it's a masterpiece and I know we've talked about the wedding cake before because you suggested that it's got real diamonds in that people are constantly breaking their insides yeah but they're too fancy to like kind of put the hand up and go hey I am

what yeah and when I said that I would like to clarify I was critiquing the diamond as a digestible not as part of a structurally sound cake at your wedding at my wedding when you get married You glamorous pussy cat.

You know how to talk me into a wedding. Ask me as a classy cat. So your ideal would be to have diamonds on the cake and just have everyone know how to deal with them, which has put them on the side. You're not eating. Is that what I'm getting? In a land of fantasy, yeah.

The whole thing is diamonds. Really? Diamond floors, chairs. It's a very physically uncomfortable, visually striking wedding. economically unsustainable as well. How many people have you got at this wedding of yours? I don't know if you've heard of a little company called audible.com.

But I've recently been talking to them as a sponsor. On the proviso, I don't talk about Jiz. We don't talk about their brand, yeah. You scratch my back, I won't talk about Jiz. I know how it goes. It's an old saying. Hey, do you want to check your shining light in here? Do you have one?

No, no. Oh, no, I've got regular notes I could try and reappropriate It's up to you I have written here This is not a shining light I would like to kick off the potty With a kiss

And then in parenthesis I've written a gift Which is the new thing I'm trying I think a kiss is always a gift, Tim And accordingly I'll give you a little I'll give one on mic It's very tender Not a shining light I'm just trying to do that

At the start of your episode now To boost Moral I won't say I don't appreciate it because I do and I appreciate you I know I do have a shining light Hit me You want to hear about it

Of course Yeah you're on luck Because I guess who has one This guy And guess Have we had too many beers before this? Yes absolutely We've been there

I don't know I feel like Because we've had since we got to Los Angeles From our The Shire In the South Pacific Tending to our sheep and lambs We've like

We've been out every night And we keep saying Yeah, tonight we'll take it easy We won't go out tonight Because we've got to kind of like You know Keep it together Yeah, we've got to not kill ourselves

Before we get back to New Zealand But consistently every night That has been thrown into the wind You know what the thing is It's just too warm in this town Yeah, big time It's like the whole Los Angeles is built behind

An extractive fan Coming out of a kitchen Oh yeah, when you walk behind You're like, oh Yeah, it's too hot I can't wait for this sweet release sort of cool air and then you keep walking

and it's just more hot it's all kitchen and there are people jogging and you think you are aware we're right next to a kitchen we saw Amy Schumer we saw Amy Schumer jogging today blew my fucking

she was walking she was in jogging gear though so it counts if you're in like if you're in the gym equipment but you're walking it's jogging look you don't hear this great shagland

does you don't know what temperature it was in Fahrenheit today can anyone 92 I don't even think that's impressive to Ameri Cans Maybe an Ameri Kant would complain about 92 Sure, but this is a room full of AmeriCans

Oh, you think 92's hot You should go to the valley in the middle of summer Now, we're looking at 13, 1.30, 140, all right? You're going to lose the loved one out there. You know what you want to do? You want to book yourself a nice beachfront home At the beach. That's a melladu. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

That is a melodoo. A melladon is not doing that. Dung on the water It's contaminated with sea lice Anyway I don't know if you have sea lice here I'm assuming you do I'd a bad spell with them at an estuary in New Zealand

I think you briefly told me about this one Brug got in a full body rash for a couple of hours Not cool Disgusting Anyway The shining light Hey hold on hold on How similar to that is Skabies

Because Skabies is like a day Very different Equally annoying Scabies last longer I don't know Can you get scabies as well No no but I've been around people with scabies What's going on with your skin man

It's cool I like young Not doing its job You got scales The Dorian gay Of the pod gay You are the Dorian gay of the gay Correct

Very good Recently I have just discovered I am an ageless gay I thought I was an aging hetero But you know you live and you learn You do Anyway The shining light

As promised But two hours ago Is the mug from which Charlotte drinks near the conclusion of the film so you know remember they're very rapidly The teacup

Yeah they're very rapidly tying up All of the story threads Which they did not feed Throughout sex in the city too And in Carrie's old apartment Which her and Big couldn't sell On account of What the

The financial Market was down The market didn't lend itself To selling a home in New York A multi-million dollar apartment So instead they just held onto it as one does as one does when the market experiences

a downturn Mr Montgomery As the audience surrogate Which Big and Carrey and all of the characters in Sex and 32 are They thought you know what The people will relate to Is sitting on your second property In the Upper East Side

I want to try and remember I feel like you were sidetracking yourself So much already from where you're headed I need to just butt out until you get to where you're coming The thing of it is So there's a cutaway As all the other story threads are being neatly tied up

So, obviously, Samantha gets to have sex with Dick Bot, the Android. And Miranda gets a new job where her, familiar with the Pokedex, is rewarded. And Carrie and Big just keep having sex and not watching TV. And Charlotte, it's not really addressed. She's obviously going through huge relationship and problems with Runkle from Californication. And she defers one day to the apartment. the unsold old apartment from the television series and she's sitting on the couch there and drinking from a teacup or a mug

which is way too big for her hand big as her fucking head if you saw this teacup you would think that it's some weird Alice in Wonderland situation because it's completely disproportionate to the woman you're seeing carrying it. Absolutely. And it's something which I've enjoyed and laughed about

with you during the film but it's never sort of occurred to it's so downcasted am I by this point in the film it's never occurred to me to say it out loud on Mike. So in a two-and-a-half-hour film about a myriad of issues they attempt to bring up and never resolve. This week, a teacup. And you'll notice from the notes I took this week

at the top of this page it just says Charlotte's mug, which I think could be an okay sequel to obviously the more well-known Charlotte's web. A spider finds a home in a mug. Across the top of one. Charlotte doesn't want to drink from it

on account of feeling empathy towards a spider Charlotte the human and Charlotte the spider befriend one another and Runkle is the pig Yeah well and finally adopt a fully kosher diet On account of being married to Runkle for overlong Runkle and Charlotte

have been married in sex in the city too I mean how many people in this room have seen sex in the city too just so we know You can make noise we can't see Okay a few people I'm going to say six or maybe seven well God bless you keep your hand up

hold on decision making hold on keep clapping if you saw it as a result of this podcast let so now please please applaud

if you just watched it off your own bat for whatever reason at the time cool does this conclude the market research portion of our podcast this way yeah we still haven't figured out

how to process the data, but it's nice to have on the table. You know who I loved this week, though? And we talked to him out a little while ago, and then he blipped off the radar. His old pink jacket. Not you.

Guy Montgomery. Pink jacket. Oh, yeah. We love pink jacket. A lot of good... So there's an extra near the start of the... And it's obviously now this... And you've even if you saw it. I mean, I'd be impressed if you remembered.

But there's an extra near the top of the film who dresses himself or is probably dressed by the costume department who are having a great time. They're having a ball in this movie. Along with the set dresses and folly people. He wears a pink jacket and he's obviously his

only direction from Michael MKP as he's known to the inner circle of friends he keeps of whom Tim and I are esteemed members. His only direction was you just put on the thickest generic Spanish accent possible and find your light. Yeah. Find your light pal.

Hey Kwan. I've named your character, Juan. Find your life. Hey, yeah. Anybody says, like, hey, Juan, because he's American, hey Juan, just find your light. We'll pay you by the second that you managed to get on

screen. And accordingly, who is otherwise a bit part extra is literally leaning in to every shot. He does a, like, stupendously phenomenal job of fucking up every take to the point where the editors would have got this steaming turd of takes. And I'm like,

this fucking guy is everywhere. Like we can't get rid of it. And MKP walks in the editor. Oh, you're talking about Juan. Just cut around him. It's literally impossible, Michael. It's a wallpaper of a character and he has no lines.

The guy is like sea lice. He's just, like, it's amazing. He's like a Wears Waldo in reverse where it's like he's always there and he shouldn't be. You don't have to look hard. He was only cast in the wedding scene. You can find him in desert scenes

in the Middle East. Try and find the fucking scene around her, let alone him in the scene. It's just a kind of pink jacket and they're at the wedding and they're walking down the eye so there's a Liza Manali reveal. It's announced that Liza Minnelli is emceeing or you know the religious term. Comparing?

Priesting. The wedding. Aren't you an officiator of weddings? Are you qualified for that? I am a celebrant, yeah. Yeah, that's the word. Celebrate. I got ordained by the Church of Life online as a 14-year-old. does anyone want to get married in the room

I've got the piece of papers printed out it's in my parents' house in a clear file somewhere like there's something printed off erotic fiction about something very embarrassing to masturbate to I'm sure like what? There's like I know like okay it's never kidding to me to say this first of all think this or say it out loud before

but there's a clear file somewhere in my parents' house which has like it's got stuff like the printed out sort of ordained minister of the church of life or whatever that means I can marry people I like the thing but also in that I printed out because you know you didn't we weren't we were young we were just

before everyone had smartphones in the internet in their bedrooms all the time okay and so this is getting very we need to get to the end very frank and personal yeah but what else is in that file man just like some like a printed out a little story

yeah like it's a little story that you wrote a little I didn't write it Sexy-in-old story? Presumably some sweaty 60-year-old dude hunched over a computer. It was a big illegal fan of... What the fuck are you talking about?

Hold on. It's just an erotic... It's an erotic celebrity fan fiction. That you've found. That I located online, printed and had an acclifile which I still don't know where it is. At your fucking parents' house.

I was 14. That's where I lived. Who were the celebrities in the... It's Hillary Duff. It was Lizzie McGuire. Hey, let me tell you something You lost me five minutes ago with this story And you just found me again, free

Because that is a fan fiction I can get behind It's out, look, well, not even, anyway Hillary Duff, gorgeous What do you think she's doing right now? It's something more productive and enjoyable I reckon she could be in sex in the city three Grownups in the city As like Samantha's long-lost daughter

Oh wait, you can't do that with a woman It's easily, eh? With dudes, it's easy to be like, surprise you've got to give it. But with women, it's like, wait. What? Yeah, I know. I can categorically say, that is not mine. I think I'd remember.

Anyway, so yeah, and there's a cliff while floating around somewhere in a family home in Christchurch, New Zealand, which has all of the most embarrassing memories of my teenage and pubescent years. Good to know. If I ever need to hold some dirt on you That's where I'll go Your dad and me get along Great too So he'll get to me

You do get along swimmingly Here's a question I want to throw at you though In honour of the Rugby World Cup Kicking off today Which I know no one in America Will care about Which is why I'm bringing it up You could feel that announcement

Galvanise the room Absolutely And well done to Japan And that huge upset against South Africa I love it I can tell you people anything You would whoop At least a couple.

Who's a rugby fan in the room? Oh shit. Okay, apologies. Those are different whoops from the people who whoops Japan. There was a roomful of people who like rugby and not the Japanese rugby team. And it's the room there a room full of people who love Japan and know nothing of rugby. Well, look, I hate to bring this up, but we're an American now, Pearl Harbor. We, you know.

Oh, hey. Well, you have bought it up. So anyway, the question I wanted to ask you was, the Rugby World Cup trials are apparently being held at the hotel. where our four sassy ladies are staying in Abu Dhabi. What the fuck is the ruse? Because there's no such thing as World Cup trials and if there was, they would definitely

they wouldn't be held in the Middle East in scorching heat. Yeah, and previously we've prodded at this sort of plot detail, if you will, which you must. In which there's a rugby World Cup trial happening in Abu Dhabi, which obviously is insane.

It's too warm. There is no such thing. thing is a rugby world cup trial where they draw on the best rugby playing nations in the world to go and play rugby in 140 degrees Fahrenheit or whatever clearly we don't understand Fahrenheit

but as more information is bled out with each watch and that's obviously how movie watching works if you watch it more and more you get more information from it it's not the same movie it's always it's an ever changing and adapting living breathing being

the logic would be surely Tim yes and esteem people of the room and internet whenever you may be listening to this you're awfully close to that communal might I'm kissing it for a kiss is always a gift

and occasionally a disease I'll find out about later but what I am saying to you is that so that whoever's in charge presumably someone at the Pentagon or involved in sort of the UN's international defense

you know they've pretty much assembled a group of highly trained athletes okay um the cough is not for comic effect it's a cough thank you for that stipulation

why have people laugh at a cough here I don't get it anyway I'm dying so they're pretty much been like okay we've got we've got this supports you fuck Dickbot theory from the previous week.

I think you can see where this is going if you come to me. It's like someone's trying to stop you getting this theory out. I'm getting a very 24 vibe. Like someone has injected some gas into the room that's causing you to fuck up. I'm back, baby! Suddenly Jack Bowers got first through the door. Pretty much what's happening is someone

who's in charge of international defence and is aware of the threat posed by Dickbot. Yeah, you're back on Max 93. Yeah, yeah. Hey, welcome back. So pretty much what's happening here is you've got the defense for us who are gathering a whole bunch of, say, Over 100, highly trained physical specimen to combat this one robot, aka a dick butt.

Oh, they had to take down dickbutt. That's right. The only reason the World Cup trial ruse exists is to counter the threat posed by this cyborg sent from, you know, wherever. Yeah. I was postulating Japan, funnily enough, so that all arcs back, doesn't it? I see what you've done there. Holy shit. What if it's like, oh.

This is an international relations. man. I feel like single-handedly we may be creating some trouble here, but what about all the ill feeling that was created from Pearl Harbor has now translated to a payback Pearl Harbor 2 in the form of Dick Bot. Dickbot is Pearl Harbor 2. So Dickbot is

been built by the Japanese Army who have yet to release the ill will that they feel, and fair enough over... About the backlash over their initial action so this is round three. Yeah. Thoughts? I have no reason to

refute what you're saying to me. Well, in the spirit of both our friendship and the energy of the room right now, it would be in my best interests to support what you are suggesting.

Here's another question I'd like to throw at you, guy. I want to discuss what you think, because it occurred to me during watching the film this day, this day, that we might be on slightly different frequencies about Brady

the Rat King and what his motivations are and like kind of his moral compass. No one asks to be a rat king for a start. What I would like to do first is just ask you can you talk to me a bit about what you interpret Brady the Rat King as being

in terms of like a dude and then I'll see if you're on the same page. Bog standard eight year old kid you know whatever the number is we'll call it eight it goes about a pretty haphazard science project slaps it together

whatever I mean you know the detail aesthetically very satisfying scientifically there is no there's no merit to it nothing nothing in what he's doing it's a salad of a science project there's no substance the kid is mailing it in absolutely and there are obviously there are big problems at home

I mean dad you know he's he's around he's a stay at home dad but he's an absentee father he's trying to get his spelling bee business off the ground mom a lawyer and so he's just slapped together a science project, taking it to school for whatever reason he's won

obviously this is the teachers ever to placate the discovery that Brady's walking into. Brady is pretty much passive the whole way through his ascent to being the rat king. Can I just hit pause on that? Do you think Brady doesn't deserve to win at the Science Festival? I think I'm on the record of saying I do not think that a mouse

maze a science project makes. I think, yeah, I think it's a reflective defensive decision from the teacher to say this kid is on the cusp of harboring the power of Vermin. We will placate him by awarding a science prize to him and accordingly

hope that he doesn't wind up. Maybe I don't know, harnessing the underworld that is the rat kingdom and taking over New York and eventually the world. Let me pause you there because the fine's going off and it might be mine, I'm not sure, but it might be if it's someone in the audience... Take it.

Yeah. Or give it to us it'll be more fun. But equal It might be me. So, yeah, my understanding of it is that Brady is, he's, he sort of, it was thrust upon him. Some people are born heroes, others, some people are born great, others have greatness thrust upon them. I believe Matt Damon said that in the Titanic. Sounds right?

I believe that the saying applies again. Okay, that's good. So we're on the same page with Brady, I think. I hadn't kind of gone that in depth about... Look, I take it, but don't let it ring out. Yeah, it's definitely a... phone going off. Make a decision on the phone call.

Let's all figure it out. Oh, it's me. It's my phone. They did it play the intro from. This is what I love about America. No one can understand how to operate an Android device. It's like giving it to someone here. Although I don't know how to turn this off.

There you go. They're like, what is this alien technology you've brought into our country that's going to take over? It's just an Android, man. They're very popular now. Just look at Samsung. Killing it in the Android space. No, I will not look at Samsung.

Anyway. Tell me, what do you think of Brady? It's hilarious that there was my phone though, huh? That is funny, I do agree. Brady, so yeah, no, absolutely. We're on the same page with this. So Brady, I've always interpreted as being sort of, I don't want to say Batman-esque,

but he's like kind of an anti-hero is what he is. So he's a guy who we can actually trust to do the right thing, but very dubious methodology of getting there and you've got to break a few eggs to make some omelets or to capitate people using your army of rats to take out of villain. I don't think they're saying is you have to break a few eggs to make some omelets.

You make one omelette at a time. Well, not if you're getting shit done, which Brady clearly is. He's an ambitious dude, you know? Multiple eggs, multiple omelets, a lot of ovens involved. Like, not just the one stove top. He's cooking up at a feast.

there are four stove jobs on one oven so there are multiple ovens involved this guy's making at least arguably five to eight omelets while harnessing the power of the entire vermin kingdom the guy's busy he's getting shit done so but my point being

like I'm glad that we're both on the same page with him he's an ethically dubious guy who I think ultimately did I didn't say any of this I'm trying to think of like an example in film where it's it's kind of when you see the villain who just does kind of petty bad shit but then redeems himself

at the end by sacrificing himself for the hero. That's who I think Brady the Rack King is. Dissimilar to Dickbott who is pure evil. But Dickbott did not ask to be pure evil. That was programmed by the Japanese. That's the beauty of his character. That's why he's such a rich character

because, like, you're right, he's a total victim of his own circumstance. He didn't ask to be an evil artificial intelligence unleashed by the Japanese onto America. He just was. He was born that way and that opens up a lot of discussions on the nature versus nurture thing. It's just a better

movie than sex in the city too. It's waiting to be made. Yeah, I agree. I agree. That's when Dennis Duggan, Adam Sandler and Michael Patrick King getting a roundtable start throwing ideas around. Big time. And probably, I would

like to think, just cuss us out for several hours. It's a satisfying thought. Imagine Michael Patrick King and Adam Sandlin met at some red carpet event and they're like these fucking guys that alone would make this worthwhile yeah we can come back to Brady

there are other points because you know obviously we're liable to get distracted there are other points during the we're liable to get distracted from what like what whatever is what is this just out of curiosity once again who in the room has never heard an episode of our podcast

before and don't be shy applaud applaud Cool What are you even watch? Are you Drew? Drew Davenport's here He's a podcast superstar Yeah you give it You give it up for Drew Davenport

Ladies and General You give it up for him But so the thing of it is though I appreciate the curiosity Thank you And I appreciate anyone who would pick up a pen I happen to drop And I appreciate the fact

That there are people in here I'm familiar with what we do Who are taking a punt on a grunt So to speak But what I don't like if my friends said to me do you want to come watch these guys

discuss sex and say two for the 30th time and you've got no context in the lead up to that that is not a strong offer yeah let's look at that schedule pretty sure Greg Proops is on at the same fucking time I think I'll give that one a pass

I'm pretty sure there's like not such a context specific discussion I could take part and maybe understand anyway I what I'm trying to say well hold on because now we're back into the market research portion of the podcast, which I love. But, like, why did you come here? You're an Aussie.

Fantastic. So when you said you're a fan of rugby, you weren't kidding. For real. Cool. And how about you? Are you guys friends? Love it. All aboard the friendship, as Montgomery Burns would say. We definitely should have miced you up for this. You came here because you heard we were going to be here.

we've met you but yesterday evening you're a sweet angel sent from on high to placate our insecurities it's funny when you don't mic up the audience as well because for the purpose of 99% of the people who will hear this who are not in the room right now any other side of the conversation could be happening we're just going to blanks

so I could be like hey so why'd you come here oh you heard we were comedy geniuses well that's very I mean it's a strong strong term It's not undue, but I'm a little embarrassed to accept it as a Kiwi. We're very shy. We're bashful people. That's right. Anyway, the original point I was trying to make was...

All right. I don't think we should be watching... No. At the wedding, at the big gay wedding, which pretty much... If you are curious, as a listener of the podcast, it's how long we can be interested in or engage with the film,

I'm pretty much taking notes and interested in what's happening all the way to the end of the wedding, which is 20 minutes out of the two and a half hours like there's action and there's like cuts and there are different characters and there's stuff to look at in the background of frame it's pretty much

from there forward that it's just the four leads just having huge problems with their great lives and what I noticed this week and you did too and we talked about it but I wrote it down is that the wedding is the direct and this is much like the party scene and grown-ups too this is obviously a big

long time spent on set and they're just telling people to do something to make it like you know, just for an interest level on the off chance, anyone decides to watch this movie repeatedly. Is the only direction giving to all of the extras at the wedding is to keep dancing. It is honestly like Job from the Bluth family

was in charge of wrangling extras during the wedding and he just said, everybody dance. Everybody dance now. And there's no Like because there's no music playing In terms of the The lineage of the Like in the order of the film

There's no music playing for a lot of the wedding But anyone you look at in the background of the frame Is dancing the whole time But dancing in a way Like the movements of very much The movements of a person who has been told to dance With a fucking gun to their face Who've been dancing for too long

No one's finding or feeling the beat They're just wriggling with nerves For their life because there's not dancing at that point that's just like worm movement oh my god I'm so sorry Michael Patrick King I'll do better

I'll do better next take sure survival it's just a bunch of people wriggling to not be prodded or shot yeah and you can tell that when you watch the movie 30 times the fear in their eyes is real

it's visceral hits me and I wanted to broach that topic this week I wanted to bring up something and that is the treatment at the top of the film leading into the movie or the wedding rather which basically is the movie for me

that wedding scene or nothing when they're in what's the name of the rest of the jewellery store again Bergdorf Goodman Does that sound like a familiar brand Americans? Bergdorf Goodman Does that sound like a familiar name to it? Bergdorf Goodman

from Bergdorf Goodman Incorporated Let me tell you A little bit about Bergdorf Goodman. father, diamond maker. I'm Mr. Bergdorf. This is my associate, Mr. Goodman. It is mighty fine to me, jaw.

Yeah. Big fans of jewelry, we would presume. Anyhow. You was saying. I can't remember what I was saying. Oh, yeah. What I was saying is I really detest the manner and nice one. Way to get me back

for that chip gag. What I detest, hashtag escalation well done what I really detest is the fact that Charlotte goes her best gay friend is marrying Mike best gay friend

as if it's like two fucking pet dogs that they're doing a faux wedding for it's detestable I hate that shit they are human fucking beings you do not own them it's so awful that's like

I think you could feel even in the performance presumably as all movies are this one was shot in chronological order and like this is the first we understand the film industry now we've been in LA for four days we get it

it's confusing otherwise how do you know what goes where so and this is the first scene so all of the actors getting together on set and they're about to hoe in to the meaty script provided by MKP and they get given it

and they go oh well equal line distribution this is going to be great because they all get given one zinger which is I understand as someone who hasn't really seen it properly was what a lot of the joy from the television series was built around was that you know you finally got to watch

four women frankly discussing their lives and all the aspects they're in and six finally and so the four of them they all get given one line or whatever and they all like go boom bomb bomb bomb and in between every one of them delivering a line

someone drives a bus in between the lines and there's no connective tissue between their zingers as well. It's just like MKP was contractually obligated to get all the women across the line to sign up. But you can feel the hope in them and the energy in them in that scene

is like, wow, yeah, yeah. Now might check this one out. Check out this little pop and zinger. All the deep-seated doubts I had about doing the sequel for the last five years were misplaced. Maybe we'll have fun together. And I feel like that that is present

even in the deplorable lines that they deliver. And so they aren't really. even paying attention to the detail of the script they're just so excited to be back on like they're sort of just trying to rallying against the tour you've got to catch up with a friend or you've got to do something like you've got to go and do something which you feel like

you should be excited about but you aren't necessarily excited to do and you convince yourself on route and even in the opening throws or whatever that activity is you're like wait so hold on let me just plug a personal example out of the air so for example you live in New Zealand your whole life and you go to America for a podcast festival which is all predicated on you

watching sex in the city too and you can't even look forward to that. Would that be a sort of sound example? Yeah. And so in spite of the huge backlog of information you have about how you're definitely not going to enjoy yourself, you start watching sex in the city too. Yeah.

Just with the blind hope that maybe this time you'll push through and wind up enjoying yourself, this is what's happening on set between on the first day that they're on set when they're at Brugdorf Goodman. the four of them are all doing this and I think by the end of the scene

is they're delivering the sort of vaguely homophobic lines they're all coming to terms with the fact that they're in for a very long time on set and a very long time in Morocco because they're not going to go

travel and shoot in Abu Dhabi because Abu Dhabi want nothing to do with the film to sit in Abu Dhabi in spite of it being paid for by the RBW Tourism Board as we understand it I feel like

we should be wearing tinfoil hats right There's only one thing that I can throw in the mix at this point because I see time's ticking, ticking away. Screwva. Scootabababababababba. Scootababba. Scribidababba. Hobababab.

Skibidabee. Scoot. Ho! Ho! Ho! Scoot! Bo! Bo!

Whoa! Whoa! Ho! Hey-oh! That lady's playing the saxophone. Skibib to be ba-p-p-p-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-d-b-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d. Where is he going? What is he wearing?

Frankly. That's the question. And the answer this week will be delivered by both of us in tandem because we both know exactly what all coffee guys up to. We know both of the questions. We know the answer to both questions. And they marry up very nicely. This is going to blow you away.

He is wearing a suit. you go I'm showing off mic to help you oh okay yeah that's how you help someone

by eating he's wearing a suit made of titanium you may be familiar with the Jackie Chan career revitalizing the tuxedo

yeah the Jackie Chan Jennifer Love Hewitt franchise which gone off the ground like a plane genuinely surprised you do know what movie I'm talking about

yeah I can't say I've seen it but I remember the poster. Of course, I haven't seen it either. No one did. I think the basic premise of that movie is Jackie Chan is sort of hapless and he's given a tuxedo which is a sort of robot as programmed to know. I'm getting a thumbs up from a member of the audience.

I'm on the nose. So the guy is wearing a titanium suit, a suit provided presumably by the US government in anticipation of any upcoming attacks. That is exactly what the movie leads you to believe. until it is revealed that said suit has been made by one John Big from a big old book of ideas

you don't mean Mr. Big from Big's big book of ideas do you? The very same, the very same man. Mr. Big while wondering on his office one day, colorblind, aimlessly looking at the stock market, trying to figure out if it was up or down. We've never said this before. not only is Mr. Big Colorblind

he suffers from awful vertigo I mean The stock market The 60th level office was a real fucking dick mode The stock market Could not be a worse place For this guy to be working

I mean The man's got no built in compass Or sense of colour He is literally Just in rotation Every day Just his whole life His guess work

Bad time So he's in there And his mind wanders a lot and to help his crippling anxiety from being put up in the 60th floor while suffering from vertigo, is he often will flick on the TV, and lo and behold, what trailer did he watch? The tuxedo, and that gave him an idea.

I'm going to rip off the tuxedo. So he just decided he was going to build the suit, and then he teamed up with a noted science legend, André Agassi. You'll remember Andre Agassi from his book, the tales of Andre Agassi. This works perfectly because big, in terms of the chronology of the film, the point at which we meet coffee guy, aka Jackie Chan, in Whiteface, is... I forgot about that, but...

Yeah, yeah. So this is when Carrie has... She's gone off the grid, so to speak, to finish that article she's writing for Vogue to promote her upcoming... book, I Do I, a first year guide to marriage. So, he might project a confident air,

but the guy is paranoid. He thinks Carrie's onto his vertigo, his color blindness, the fact he's been losing their money for over 10 years. He pours what remains of their savings into the suit and into Agent Chan,

who then, he's tasked with following Carrie around New York. So Carrie thinks she's out gas bagging with the gals, guess what? Bigg's got a mole right next door. You dig what I'm saying? I absolutely do. The audience might be confused

by the fact of course I know the plot of this this story, but the audience might be a little confused that it seems like Mr Bigg's chief character point is that he's losing a lot of money

and the way he solves that is by following his girlfriend around with a gyna titanium suit. which doesn't seem to solve any of those problems. You know, the thing is, when you're in the depths of despair, you're not thinking straight. Exactly. You're not processing each problem individually. They all meld into one sort of hellscape,

and you're just trying to fix things as they occur to you. And accordingly, you don't get anything done because you're just in a panic. And this is the circumstance in which Mr. Big finds himself. But, I mean, yeah. Beautifully, we both know the ending of this tale. Well, which is the most obvious setup for a sequel in the history of cinema. Correct.

Michael Bay would do well to learn from the end of sex in the city too, which there is the nationwide power surge, obviously from the Pentagon, the source of all-American power. Because Brady the Rat King has found a way to just throw his armies. He's actually, not a lot of people know this, Americans, but all of the power in your country is generated from the Pentagon. That's right. There's one, two hundred.

what plug. There's just been daisy chained on a bunch of multi-plugs. There's a multi-plug and then an extension cord. And if you look, actually I don't know if you guys have looked at America from satellite before, but you can actually trace the state lines from

the extension cords running across the land. It's like the Great Wall of China but a lot more dangerous. Yeah. And thinner because, you know, they're only this, I mean, they're not water, it's risky. What are you guys are doing? This whole room. Brady has figured out

that the economic powerhouse of the free world, the United States of America, has one chink in its armor, and that is the power grid, which seems haphazardly put together at best. And he's just thrown his armies concurrently, all of those rodents together, focused on the Pentagon, and who's going to save them? Interestingly, Mr. Bigg,

and his Agent Chan, titanium, soup man, but we don't find out how it goes because it's a franchise and you don't milk that shit. You can't just set up. something that interesting I say as people leave the room and some people would say it's an anti-climax

which dangerously seems like something weird teetering over the edge of creating I beg to differ I beg of you to have a different opinion from you me too find it the origin of that colloquialism

begging to differ to be honest I grovel to ye on my knees to have an alternative opinion. We've got to call it off, mate. This has gone too long. This conversation?

Yeah. Absolutely not. No, it's gone too long. I've got to stuff written down. Sorry, what did you just say? I'm from where you're from and I didn't understand what you were saying. I can only imagine what other people were hearing.

I've got stuff written down. I'm going to, in all seriousness, I'm going to give you 90 seconds to wrap up. You're like three different points. Okay, first of all, Tim, do you think we will be friends A forever? B. A while from now, or C,

not after February. February 2016? Yeah. I reckon forever. That's very sweet. Thank you. Next. Okay, secondably. I know the clue is in the title

and then in parenthesis I've written the word sex but if I know I'm surrounded I do not have the confidence to have sex like that now the context is obviously everything I know what you're talking about

and no one else does yeah no so the thing of it is Samantha and this is the issue with watching the movie and not having seen the television series is like but I understand

Samantha's character she's sort of she's rambunctious she's confident She enjoys herself as in when she pleases sexually. But in the film, she winds up having sex at the big gay wedding, trademark Michael Patrick King, with like a concrete layer called Nicky, right? And they're having sex, and they are sandwiched in between two rooms,

one in which her friend Charlotte and husband, Runkle, are sleeping with their two children, the other one which Big and Carrier. And they are fucking so loudly. 20 seconds. It is shaking the very foundations of the wooden, New Hampshire House. What I'd like to say to you, Tim, is, I don't know, I don't know, I think that, I think...

Sorry, I'll stop the clock, it's a really mean thing to do you, but... When I'm sort of bearing my section of soul to you. So, what you're saying is... I could not... What they're doing is... I shouldn't have a bit of chips on stage. What you're saying is you couldn't have sex with someone that loudly

at a wedding when you know that there's heaps of people, you know are around. Is that the gist of we're headed with this thing? You know, when you boil it down to its composite parts, it doesn't feel like it was worth bringing up. What was your third point?

Yeah. Yeah, what I'm trying to say is I don't really love having loud sex when I know people can hear. I just needed a room full of people to know that. It's not relating to sex in the city to at all. I just want

that to be on the record. What's your third? third point. Fuck you. Come on, buddy. Bring it home. Bring it home. Let's do this. I just brought it so far home. I have given

two deeply personal details. I had no intention of sharing. I literally can't remember the first one. I know it happened like four minutes ago. I don't know what you said. It won't be on record. Look, you know, man, I like you so much. I really do.

Oh, that's right, friends forever. Yeah. How ironic. So, no, see, hey, no, I want to hear the third one, come on. The other thing I've written down, I've got, I don't know why they really hone in on Carey's eye-make-up purchase and subsequent use. Yeah, you remove context. These sound like the ramblings of a madman.

No, listen. Hey. You give Montgomery 20 seconds in counting down. Suddenly they make perfect sense. How do you? how dare you because you're right how dare you in you attacking yourself not how dare you by coming up with the original point

I was trying to attack you let me tell you something folks the carry eye makeup thing makes no fucking sense she's gone to Abu Dhabi this is a chick who brought with her like 80 pieces of luggage she has got ample amounts of makeup that she's brought with her even if they're on a

PR trip there's no doubting this lady had to pay for extra baggage totally but the film pays special attention to the fact that Carrie when she is in the souk buys special eye makeup like mascara right that's just there in Abu Dhabi which she doesn't need

and you see her buying it you see her paying for it you see you're talking about it you see putting it on tearing an off brand mascara from like a whole sort of there's like a laid out like this long sort of there's just it's all just individual

tubes of mascara and you see a close up of her pulling it off there's no brand name recognized like this movie is all advertising. There's nothing to tell you what this product actually is. But there's still a very intense shot of exactly what she's tearing off. It makes no sense then. And then later in the movie, when

she's preparing for her date with Aidan so she can cheat on who she's discovering as a pretty unreliable financially and emotionally husband. There's another shot of the same off-brand mascara. Neither of them amount to any... Do you know what?

In saying it out loud, though, to people who don't know it like we know it. Yeah. And it sounds condescending, but you will never know this movie

like we do. That is a fact! Finish your sentence, Bovey. What were you saying? This is the red herring of the film from the advertising department.

They're like, if we chuck in a couple of off-brand, because Sobu, we had Mr. Big works in with So-Boo. Yeah. So-Bu fusion.

Yeah. And there's a very gratuitous shot of So-Boo. I've Googled So-Bu. I want to eat it. So-boo has either never existed. like Charlie Kelly and it's always

sunny thought of here. There is no Carol from HR! No, there is the best episode of television ever made. Absolutely. Fuck that is good. Get rid of that pen. I'm sick of it. There is no Sobu Fusion from New York.

Really? So this is the people who sold brand space and this lends itself also to that huge billboard with nothing advertised when they're driving through. the planes of the Middle East. Just got a dude's face. They've got at least three things in which there's no actual advertisement

brand. There's nothing they're selling because it's like well if we put in a few things that don't exist it will distract from the fact that Bergdorf Goodman and Louis Vee and all these other boogey brands have paid a shit ton of cash to get this thing done in the first place. I've lost it. Suzanne Summers, probably the best example.

But I get what you're saying. You're saying that if you put enough fake brands in you can't see the wood from the trees of what's paid advertisement and what's just there for the universe of the film. Word economy, baby. I'm going to wrap up on this because I theorise what has happened is they've tried to sell the ad space

having got the figure they were looking for and are so fucking vindictive that they're like, we're keeping in the slot and we're not filling it, just to fucking show them what could have been. So they went to Max or whoever makes makeup and they were like, you know, there's a bit of a talk,

they said we can make something happen, doesn't get across the line. Fuck you, all the screen time you could have had is remaining in the cinema that cut of this film so you can see what you could have and you didn't

that is exactly correct and do you know what I noticed for the first time this week who I thought had an absolutely fantastic spot

actually of paid advertising in the film is this great new sort of crowdfunded startup called kick

no no what's it called audible audible.com um and audible dot com over 180,000 over 180,000

would you believe that what are you can't even count that high Um, over 180,000 books. Now, a book, imagine a movie, but it's hard work and boring. You are now thinking of a book. You know that movie The Martian? It's got, what's his name? Matt Damon. Thank you.

From the Titanic. You go. You sure know your movies. That was a book first, apparently, and the audio book is available from audioaudible.com. So just use the code audible.com slash LAPodfest That's right

And what you'll get is a free book And a 30 day trial For this great service Which frankly I can say I can't get enough of And I say that in the same way

Like I can't get enough Of sort of gold bars Because I've never had a gold bar Oh baby We've got to close these threads off We can't start chucking new threads in But what I'm saying is While

I might not know audible, I've never kissed audible and every kiss is a gift I understand it to be an outstanding product and I'm good ladies and gentlemen

Guy Montgomery. Ladies and gentlemen Tim Bat thank you so much for coming out have a wonderful evening you're the real stars now I'm not sure how long we've got this room for but I'll bet there's a lot of bladders out there that need emptying so if you want to

Like, do it now and freedom. Free from, you know, scorn or embarrassment. So do we finish and you're still talking to the room like they're a captive audience? Yeah, absolutely. Because aren't we going to do like a Q&A if anyone had any... Oh, yeah, yeah. To get some things. How long do we have the room for?

Hello. Okay. Okay. That's a decisive female voice. I like that. Anyone with any questions or theories pertaining to either of the two, films with which we're familiar. Predominantly, if someone can

give us a good coffee guy. If you're waving... I'll come around. Are you going to go... No, come out, no, come out. No, come out. He's already on his way. Oh my goodness. Ladies and gentlemen. It's Travels McElroy. My brother, my brother and me. Hello. I had a question, and we were talking a little bit about it the other day. Is this... I haven't watched it, and I will not.

You brave and hard. solve. Does it ever hit the point of good bad, like the room or that kind of idea of like, oh my God, if I got a group of people together, it would be so bad, it'd be good. Sex in the City too? Yes. So, if I may? Yes, please. Luckily, it doesn't. And we were really, no, we were fucking worried about that when we picked our second film. So, grown-ups too, with both

films, they're so slickly produced, and there's so much money that's been poured into them that they don't achieve that level of enjoyable bad the room's the perfect example of that where it's just like whose hands are on the wheel here just one dude and he's insane right and he's funded the whole thing himself and it's just a glory project for him

but luckily the studio had enough involvement to polish that turd to the point where you're like a shiny turd-looking rock interesting so you kind of you can't grab onto the badness of it because the only reason we picked sex in the city too is when we were making this little video to say

thank you to our fans and we did the reveal that it was like, and we're going to do it all again for season two. We experimented with a couple images. In that movie poster of Carrie in the desert. Hilarious. Fucking dynamite. And sort of running concurrently with the runtime, we laughed at it just maniacly. As an idea, not as something we would pursue, but just as like, it's no consideration

for what it meant. But I'd go even further and say, grown-ups too, eventually. like we were lucky enough when we watched it for the last time we were in a cinema full of people who had heard the podcast and sort of knew the trigger moments which we'd enjoyed and there was in watching that the satisfaction of like something say the room wherein you can all grab onto these moments and say yeah I remember that I remember that

Sex and City 2 it's so long that like it's I do not fucks you up if we were to watch it like it's it's just a competently made terrible film if we were to watch it with a room full of people have listened to even every episode of this season of the podcast

I don't think I think everyone would walk out you're like tired and broken I don't think there'd be that sort of

like sort of galvanizing energy across the room of like yeah because all the things we talk about

they like cumulatively they make up less than 20 minutes of the film so you've got another two hours and 10 minutes

of movie which you're just waiting through to get to the trigger Like, does this answer your question at all, Travis? Perfect.

Yeah, okay. Thank you very much. Thank you, Travis McElroy. Travis McElroy. And if you, if you, if you people out there don't listen to my brother, my brother and me yet,

you goddamn shooks. It's the best podcast around. Is anyone else got to... Hello. Come up. We want to see you. Come on up. We'll see them.

It's okay. Thank you very much, though. Why, if it's not... Stuart Goldsmith! Ladies and gentlemen from the Comedians' Comedian podcast. Hello, you remain the only other podcast that I've advertised from

my own podcast. Thanks man. Thank you. Happy to be on the... What was the other one though? What was that? What was the other one? No, I said you were the only one. Oh, we're the only one. Oh, we're the only one and our one. Fantastic. Such generosity of spirit. I had... Get in the light street so people can see you. I'd first like to point out

the irony of the fact that it is Guy Montgomery who is currently battered when it is actually Tim Batten that stayed up all night the other night. And actually, my question is which of the two of you is the biggest Lush. Fuck, that's a good question. Could you please give us a working definition

of Lush? Drunkard. There we are. Oh, now, I like I like a tipple as much as the next guy. I like a bear as much as the next guy. No, I'd like to say on balance that we sort of

we take turns. I think that the... You sort of do take turns. You're not both battered at the same time. Just so we don't completely tune out the audience. that's so lovely to come and watch this. Yeah, I didn't sleep for like 40 hours and then I definitely have to go to sleep tonight

and then I just didn't again. So I just got drunk again and... But it's sort of... Someone is applauding Tim's... Terrible disrespect for his body. Lovely of thought. I think our approach to drinking is similar to the podcast in which

we tend to... There's like some sort of weird counterbalance. A seesore. We're like, if I see Tim sort of really... having a crack and, you know, sink in a few bruise, so to speak. The amber nectar. If Tim thinks it's bare a clock, I'll pull back. So I will get to, A, enjoy Tim in all of his drunken glory, and B, clean up after the mess.

That is Tim. And vice versa. Absolutely. We've got each other's backs, Cheap. Friends forever. First equal, friends forever. Thank you, Stu. I have a follow-up question.

Please. Given that you've got tattoos regarding... Have you shown those tattoos to this audience? Have you been in the room the whole time? I have not been in the room the whole time. I don't know. I don't know what underwear I'm wearing. I'll do it.

I don't know, man. Yeah, we've got tattoos. So you've got tattoos. So my question, you've got the tattoos. Get your kid off while he's talking. As I understand it. Look at that, ladies and gentlemen. In all his glory.

Patrick Schwarzenegger. Happy birthday, Patty. Party machine! I believe, as I understand it, you got these tattoos in order to, they were an incentive that on a crowdfunding website, Indiegogo, you've got enough money to take yourself to America for the thing. Presumably you're going to try it again this year to come back to America for the finale of this season.

Or the United Bar Merey Emirates. And all Morocco. Or as you say. Or as you say, the UAE or Morocco. My question then is presumably the fans are going to be hungry for you to do something even more extreme and permanent. Give us $4,000 and we'll both get lobotomies. What the fuck do you want, man? Mic drop.

Thank you very much. Stuart Goldsman, everybody. Does anyone else have any questions? Yep, please come up. Alternatively, if it's not a question you have, and you may have a theory about what. He is doing all where he is off to you're allowed to share that as well. Okay, what's your name, sorry? George.

Everybody around and applause for George. He's an angel. Handsome guy. George Zimmerman. Yeah. Yeah, I saw you remember the moon. Yeah, that is unfortunately my name. It's cool. It's a fine name.

Don't let some douchebag get you down, man. Thank you. That means a lot. I actually have a question about the tuxedo theory. Yes. So you were talking about... You know, it's very honed. Yeah, yeah.

So let me just open with that. I can't remember if you landed on Pearl Harbor 2 or Pearl Harbor 3. for when Dickbot invades the United States and I was just curious about when inevitably civilian technology gets repurposed by the government to defend the country and Tuxedo guy and DickBot have to battle what's going to happen during that battle?

Look, a round of applause was such a fantastic flesh out question. A tremendous question. I would love to answer it but I just don't think we've got enough time. Sure. But I mean... Rest assured, we will be digging into this

and subsequent... it will be uncovered over the coming weeks but what you have asked for is essentially an improvised fan fiction and we are pressed it's just so dense I would normally

detailed and smart was the question I literally did not understand the second half of it let me say this though the battle is long and we lose a lot of souls along the way but we just unfortunately within this format in this room we don't have enough time to explore the entire thing but we will

I'd like to borrow a quote from Jeff Gobloom in a little non-film called Dead Poets Society. I believe he said, O'Captain, life finds away. There's anyone else.

Is there nobody else? Yeah, come on up. Hey, we've met before. Yeah. Introduce yourself. stage. Introduce yourself? Gage. Gage. A talk glass of water, everybody. Gage, come up on stage so we can see you.

And hit us with your question, my friend. I incidentally regret giving you stage instructions. What's your question, man? I apologize. I apologize. It's okay. So, I have another tuxedo-related question. We literally made this up. Let the mentor.

I've seen the movie back in 2002-200. 2003 and Jackie Chan was a ballet and the tuxedo was a government issued weapon that that's right I don't know why I ever we'll remember yeah did very well at the box office it did I don't think it did okay but I didn't see us I don't know I'm sorry I agree to disagree finish your question they gauge anyways um so is it possible that mr big is Jackie Chan just in white face uh so mr big is not who we're attributing a Agent Chan too. It is in fact coffee man. Yeah, coffee guy is

un-deny. Loath as I am to correct you, Gage, because you've really, you've grabbed onto a thread we've just created. But this is, we did, we did, no, no, no. I was thinking of T.F. Chang's the whole time. Yeah, fair enough. It's a common mistake. It's a common mistake. But no, no, no. As a racist.

Categorogically. Is it? I thought George Simpson had already got off stuff. Am I right? Oh! Hey. I know, there was more of an A-O, not like, I wasn't trying to terrify my friend Tim.

Look, no one here wants to offend anyone. We're probably always already. What I'm trying to say is that Jackie Chan is in Whiteface's coffee guy and Mr. Big is Chris Knoth or Knoweth, as he's known on the Bible Belt. Pretty much, we appreciate the theory, but it is inaccurate as it stands. Go ahead and a post for Gage everybody. What is our time at? Ten minutes?

I'm going to see you. Down the back, you put your hand up a few times. Please, please come on up. Address the room. Wonderful. Thank you. What's your name, sir? Nick. A few episodes back you went into, what's his face? Steve really deeply and got into his interview with his manager.

Did he speak to you at all today? Steve. Steve. Is he around? You mean in terms of watching the movie, did Steve maybe come out? out of his shell. Did anything come out to you? You know, Steve, he's a flaky guy.

He's got a lot on. And he didn't really have a lot of time to come out and say, how you doing? D-O-O-O-O, and the word in doing. The answer is no. Was that more lines that he had? Yeah. Thank you, Nick.

Thank you, Nick. Great question. Ian, everybody. Welcome to stage, Ian. A sweet angel. Another sweet angel. Head us with the rhythm stick, Ian. All right.

So, serious business. Hold on. Let me get their mic out of the stand. Okay. I'm having some problems with my girlfriend. I've got this. this rash. The problem is I haven't got one.

All right, so the... Believe in yourself. Yeah. Never. Round of applause, no, no, no, no. Season three, I have a pitch for season three. You're going, you're not going to like it.

You're not going to like it. But, but do you actually say streets ahead? Streaks. Oh, I say streets. I don't have this to say. Lead the man talk. Okay. Very sidetracked.

Season three, you've watched grown-up and sex in the city too, and I think it would be hilarious if for every week for a year you watched Citizen Kane and grew to hate that. That is my pitch. I would like you to react.

Beautifully phrased, everybody round of applause. Thanks, Ian. You know Ian's on his way to becoming a congressman, and the thing that's going to get him there is his directness? I haven't seen Citizen Kane, so it does

it means that criteria. I'll tell you two reasons where it's not going to happen. The first is Citizen Kane is a beloved film and I have... Yeah, I get it. The second reason, though, is I know where it weighs out at the moment.

I'm pretty convinced there will not be a season three of them. Yeah, just for clarity, in a dream world, Tim and I would find an alternative podcast concept that we both are mutually enthused by which would not involve

quite literally jumping into a blender every week really been hung by our own patards on this one yeah like yeah is that the word patard patard no one knows what it means or what a patad is

but we all just so yeah yeah yeah no one's to be hoisted on a patad what's a patad that's terrifying and that is our reaction Ian thank you for the question Do Joe Dirt 2. Pardon? Joe Dirt 2.

I thought he's a Citizen Kane 2, to which I would say, yes, sir. I've got a lot of fondness in my heart for Joe Dirt 1, though. I haven't seen it in a cool decade and change, but I loved it when I first saw it. We've probably got time.

Yep. What's your name, sir? David. David. David, ladies of generous. It's goddamn superstar. I'm going to keep this real brief, but as obvious experts on

both of these movies that you guys have done, which lady from Sex and the City ends up with which grown-up? Fucking excellent question, David. You legend. I think we've speculated but we've never really... And it might change, actually, from our original answers,

but here's how it calves up. Okay, do you know what we should do? We should both shut our eyes. Yeah? And one of us should... So I'll do growing up characters. Okay. You do sex and city two characters. We'll both shut our eyes. Yep. And at the same time

we'll say out loud one of the characters. We'll take turns and we'll alternate who goes first. Exactly at the same time. We'll pair them off. But then how will they hear what we're saying? Because it's the same time. We'll say it at the same time. No, we'll say them at different times. No. We'll say at the same time, then we can discuss what we say out loud. Okay.

So we shut your eyes. No, wait, no. Hold on. That doesn't make any... That doesn't make any fucking sense. It works perfectly. We both shut our eyes. You say a character from sex in the city. Five! Four, three, two, one, Miranda. There you go, Miranda and Lamensoff. That would work.

That's a relationship, that would work. What Lamansoff needs in his life is a strong female presence. That's why he's always gravitating towards his mum. Sally isn't strong enough to keep him on the porch. That came out weird. Miranda is a lawyer. She is a strong, independent woman who knows what she wants, and she is very articulate with her needs.

Five, four. Three, two, one, Carrey. McKenzie, is his character's name. So what we've got here obviously is McKenzie, the layabout cable installer and Carrie Bradshaw. Both of them have a lot of time on their hands. They both skyve off of work regularly.

It's not a financially sustainable relationship. But it's certainly a good time, baby. Five, four, three, three, two, one Samanth Well that is actually a match made in relationship in heaven

Samantha Higgins Their main character trait Across grown-ups to and Sex and City 2 is a desire to fuck anything that moves Too true Accordingly they could

Hold up You know wherever Preferably Samantha's office or apartment As opposed to Higgins' run-down apartment in New Hampshire But frankly

I think that While neither of them You've been saying New Hampshire a lot But I think Connecticut or is Connecticut in New Hampshire and New Hampshire and Connecticut? Neither of those things are in each other and it's not important. Are they, where does the Venn diagram sit with New Hampshire and Connecticut?

Pretty much. Higgins and Samantha are what each other need to sustain a long-term relationship, which of course leaves Lamansoff and Charlotte. Tim, could you please unpack why this relationship? We did Lampensoff at the top. Yeah, and by Lamansoff, I mean Lennie Fader. If you'd listen for one goddamn second in your life. You did well.

You tested me and I passed the test and I appreciate it. So, Lenny Fader and Charlotte. this is the most neurotic interestingly she's still wound up with a Jewish man so I think that was just destined to happen which is cool the stars of a line just throwing cultural aspersions on all Jews there

they're all neurotic no separate separately he is neurotic and then my mind wandered maybe there is something like that he is not neurotic the guy is confident and relaxed he's a talent agent from Hollywood who's moved back to his hometown

with his family it's an interesting movie idea. The moral is they both have strokes on their fifth wedding anniversary and it ends terribly. One of them dies and inherits the other one's fortune. That is the ultimate conclusion to not only any movie involving these characters but probably the conversation

we have had in front of you and into your airs today. Once again thank you so much everybody. I'm Guy Montgomery. I'm Tim Back. Big thanks to LA Podfest for having us. Thanks for all of you for coming. Truly it means a lot. Live every moment. And love every day. Goodbye.

And get out of here. God damn animals.