The Yak - A Once Proud Radio Classic Hits Rock Bottom | The Yak 8-16-21

Episode Date: August 17, 2021

Looks like weve got a case of the MondayssYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak

Hey, Yak listeners. You can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Cut the music. Cut the music. Cut the music. Cut the music. The Yak. A once-pr proud radio program. One time I was told that The Yak was second only in listeners on the Sirius platform to Howard Stern. We were incredible. We had a pick and roll, a three-man weave.

We had four-person, the boxing one. We were doing so much incredible stuff with such a talented and wide array of incredible broadcasters that we would have on this very program. We were a juggernaut. No one could stop us. It was the pinnacle of broadcasting. Brokaw, Costas would have groveled to have a fucking seat at the table at the yak we were a mighty program how the mighty have fallen we had such a talented deep roster and today it's just me and tommy smokes yep that uh was an insulting monologue. I figured that was the direction it was going in

the second it started. I'm happy to be on. Thank you for inviting me on. And I know the three man you're talking about was probably... It was probably... No, I thought it was Summer Fridays. Me, Zod, Dana B. People forget the evening yak on Friday, summer of 2018

used to be... A lot of times it was me, Zod, Dana B people forget the evening yak on Friday summer of 2018 used to be a lot of times it was me Zod Dana B and and people I assume that's the pinnacle of broadcasting that you were referencing please do not do not alter your YouTube do not turn off your podcast do not smash your phone you need to give you need to give us a chance right now you need to give me and Tommy a chance because we can make something happen we can make something happen in here we got zha in the booth we have tj in the booth and we have steven che in the booth that's a talented booth right there the booth might even on the scale of justice be outweighing us as far as talent right now and that's okay but we're gonna cobble through this we're gonna fight through this we're going to cobble through this. We're going to fight through this. We're going to fucking slog through this shit like we're escaping from Shawshank.

And we're going to find something magical. I mean, we're great friends. I think of this as an hour-long conversation between a couple of pals. I think we could do that. We do that every other day, basically, when we head out for drinks. So this is how the lineup started. Big Cat, he's out of here. He's on Grit Week. Okay. Brandon walker i don't even know where he is but he wasn't even on pick central he left

rico and marty to talk about nascar an incongruous pairing of people and subjects but still that's how he left them i don't even know where brandon walker is, he's somewhere with his straight dad. I'm pretty sure. KB? I can't even say. Owen with KB. I asked Donnie. He couldn't do it. Oh, I wasn't first

choice. Not even close. I asked Frankie and Trent if they would come on and talk about the Caleb situation. They wouldn't do it. I asked Caleb if he would come back to talk about the Caleb situation. They wouldn't do it. I asked Caleb if he would come back to New York just for this. He wouldn't do it. I asked Jeff D. Lowe if he would come on. He wouldn't do it. Okay.

We have such a deep roster of people that I could ask, and here we are. So I was, what, the 13th? You're around the 13th pick. That's not bad for really is of a hundred it really isn't bad but also that just shows that i mean people are walking by look at them they laughed at you why is everyone they probably have a stream of the show in their ears and are laughing at our conversation what have what's what has been funny yet all of it so far i don't know great banter back and forth it and forth. It's been dire.

I think that it's been – it's just – I mean, it's like watching a 300 hitter who could fucking jack 40 home runs at the end of his career. Is that me? Who's – this show. It's this show. And then he's fucking eking out fucking dribblers. He's hitting 189 now. But he's getting the job done.

Oh, no. 189. Yep, the job done oh no 189 yep yep all right no or it's a team that that was once great uh and you know it's the fall of a dynasty and they're middling and now they have this hot young prospect he's the number three right i agree in baseball and you give them the call up on one day where everybody else is out and all of a sudden you make some magic happen he has a two home run game and in his first debut i so first debut is a it's a repetitive yeah redundant yep but i mean i i'm here to i'm here to give you the chance of that and that just shows how little i respect everybody else that's sitting out there that i i asked that well outside of like five or the five or six people you asked I'm saying of everybody else that's out there, I asked you instead of all of them. You whispered it to me at my desk.

I know. I passed Donnie a note. Did you not want other people to know that I was getting the opportunity? Yeah. I knew it would be bad. I knew that it would be bad for morale, for everybody's self-esteem. Steven, we used to run something here. We used to do something big here.

What are you seeing with what's going on here from a scouting perspective? Just the fall of an empire. You're right. A guy hitting 189 towards the end of his career. But I don't think that we're even close at the end of the career. I think this is just kind of an off day. It's rock bottom. It's a vet day.

I feel like Hunter Biden smoking crack with a hooker right now. This has been a real confidence boost, this opening segment. I just really had to set the table. And I'm an under-promised, over-delivered kind of guy. So I'm really trying to lower the bar. I'm trying to set the expectation so low on this show that if we crack a fucking single joke, that'll be enough for the people. And none of this is my fault this isn't my show i

know there's 13 people here that are above me in the packing order i'm simply doing a favor exactly no and you are by gracing it with my presence and to be honest i really appreciate it no and i appreciate you giving me the opportunity to shine and uh we you and i have we do have a strong chemistry we do i was at you invited me to your wedding. No. No. I was at your bachelor – no, I wasn't at your bachelor party. I've been over to your apartment.

We've gone out to – We've hung out outside of – have we ever hung out outside of – I don't even think we've shared a beer before. No, we did when you recorded my thoughts. We shared it. Oh, yeah. It was like 3 p.m. on a Wednesday. I don't know if that totally counts but i don't know if we've ever seen each other voluntarily outside of work for a non-work

event that and that's where we're at right now yeah it's incredible and the only time that we really built chemistry is when i said i want to make thursday thoughts better let me start filming them a little bit and then we started to build a little bit of chemistry yes and i kind of gave you the keys to uh the kingdom i kind of uh taught taught you how to fish and uh that was the analogy i was going for i couldn't think of exactly what it was taught taught a man to fish and you were supposed to fish for a lifetime but uh i've resorted back to so i mean it's hard to get people to film sometimes why people walking around filming you like people walking around filming. You might have to teach me how to fish again. Yeah. Yeah.

You might have to give me a few more pointers on how to fish. Because that month where we were doing Thursday Thoughts together, the numbers fucking skyrocketed. We were crushing. It was incredible. It was like the old yak. It was fucking great. It was like we were just on an absolute roll, and we need to get back to that. But I want you to start rattling through some current some current event stuff uh afghanistan taliban yep crazy i had no idea the taliban was still

kicking i thought uh i thought we had squashed them i thought that was like an old news thing i was stunned to see that they're powerful enough to just own a country now i feel like this is inappropriate to talk about the way that you're you of going on about it. I'm serious. That's not inappropriate. That's my real opinion. I was stunned. Yeah. And not only are they kicking, but they're powerful right now. Yeah.

Bad. Yeah. It's almost like there's no joke you can even make because of how significantly terrible it is. I did not, in preparation of this show i did not prepare any taliban jokes that was not on my agenda okay well i appreciate that did you no i have none i absolutely have none za coming into to do his taliban joke f with the boys za why don't you hop on a mic for a little bit like just just talk with us uh because god god knows we need it bro what what's been good with you oh Oh, callers? Shut up.

We're about to get callers in this bitch? That's the smokes effect. I should probably tweet out. Yeah, you should. Feel weird how? Because it's just... I feel weird being on this side of the room. I know. I'm usually not on this side of the room.

But I'm alright, man. How you guys doing? Dude, we're fantastic. What we love of you on the other side of the room. But I'm alright, man. How you guys doing? Dude, we're fantastic. What we love of you on the other side of the room is the laugh, and it usually feels like kind of a roast of Stephen Che. Your beautiful laugh. But at the same time, though, I value you

for your thoughts as well. Oh, stop it. So give us your Taliban jokes, because I want to hear them. I want to get to the bottom of them right now. It's looking pretty peak. I'm looking for one. Actually, let me not. The fact that you're even saying that stuff looks peak is just a testament to how much you've been hanging out

with big troops. Yeah, too much. Too much time. Troops has big things happening in his life, too. Yeah, I don't know if I'm allowed to talk about that stuff on here, but yeah, everyone's got things going back. Yeah, it don't know if I'm allowed to talk about that stuff on here, but, yeah, I mean, everyone's got things going back.

Yeah, it's incredible. Why were you not over in England with troops when Jetski went over there? I feel like that would have been a prime locale for Zadav. Yeah, I know, man. So the Euros were meant to happen last year. My work permit was three years long, so I got it in 2018, and this year was the last year. My work permit was three years long. So I got it in 2018. And this year was the renew year.

So if they were actually at the time that they were meant to happen, I would have been over there. You would have been there? Yep. It just so happened that it coincided with my work permit reapplication process. Fuck yes, bro. And when are we going to get some travel in? What's your next travel? As soon as I get my work permit back and they open up and you can go somewhere. I'm trying to go back to Zimbabwe.

So maybe we can get a Zimbabwe 2.0. That's what I'm saying. What about this? Come through. Pull up. You were in Ethiopia the last couple years ago, right? Yeah, man. I'm saying let's do a drive from Zimbabwe to South Africa.

I'd love that. How dangerous could it be? I would love that. I mean, you'll probably see some shit on the way, but hey. What kind of shit? Outdoor shit or people with guns who just don't care if you live? All of it. Really? You'll see some outdoors, a little bit of everything. Some outdoors, some lions.

My dad really wants to go on a safari back to Africa. He went... What do you mean back to Africa? He went like 30 years ago or so. Really? Yeah, he went on a safari with friends in Kenya. Oh, nice. And he wants to do it again. And I said, O'Dad, I'm going to let you down and disappoint you.

I just can't see myself doing that. Why? I don't. I'm scared. Animals scare me. But that's not how it's going to happen. People don't get killed on safaris. Are you sure?

White dudes from New York do not get killed on safaris. That's who's going on safaris I could see you would know yeah you would know if they were dying yeah true

I just could see a New York Post article about me that's probably that's probably the one place or one of the few places that you won't die period

oh that's not even that far 18 hour drive that's almost a day that's deceptively long that's almost a day I thought that it was going to be

I mean the Ethiopia to South Africa drive I mean that's crazy And that's like guaranteed death Yeah I think you're supposed to take a month And they're like you shouldn't do that But there's one dude that just wants to do it Yeah because you go through some dodgy areas Can you just tell Tommy though that he's not going to die

If he just goes on a safari I thought we proved that Didn't you watch the video What do you mean no you didn't watch Oh the video? Did that look like a place that you were – What do you mean no? You didn't watch – Oh, that video. I thought you said –

I thought you showed me a specific video about how to not die on the safari. Yeah, you and Donnie. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's what the point was. I – but, you know, anything can happen. I don't trust my luck out there. I feel like I could – There could just be a rogue lion or something.

Your luck is fine. Adventure a little bit. Yeah, maybe. You should. Why not? I'll stick to you. I like Green Bay, like, it's fine. Adventure a little bit. Yeah, maybe. You should. Why not? I like Green Bay, Wisconsin. It's beautiful. One of the most lovely places I've ever been. This is the guy that wants to do Survivor, right? Yeah, right? Survivor, you're in a

controlled environment. There's been 40 seasons of that show. Nobody's died so far. The best thing that's ever happened to your ego is that Survivor happened indoors so you could actually win it. Oh, yeah yeah that's definitely no that was uh like that made me think okay i could do well with the strategy of survivor but the survival part uh my confidence in that took a downturn because that was seven days indoors and

i was barely hanging on by the end of it and we were were just in a luxurious New York City office. Yeah. My face turned white. My nose turned a different color, I think. I had a bad sinus infection. I feel like that was worse than the real Survivor. That had to have been worse than the real Survivor. I can't imagine it's worse. Yeah. I was sleeping on a couch every night with no bugs.

Yeah, that's fucking awesome. This office? God, I'd rather fucking sleep. I'd rather sleep in the bush than in this office. I haven't seen any rats recently, though. Or mice. I feel like there used to be a ton of mice. And this is as dirty as this office has ever been.

Every single desk is fucking disgusting. The people who fucking work here are gross. Your desk is disgusting. No, it's not. You have the gift basket for when you... Like the Hogecoin gift basket. Yeah, what's disgusting about that? It's a bottle of Francis Coppola wine.

You say Coppola? Coppola, Copp of Francis Coppola wine. You say Coppola? Coppola, Coppola. Coppola would be the Coppola. Like Coppola. Coppola. You never heard that dude's name before?

So does he look like the Nick Cage family? I think he's more famous than being reduced to the Nick Cage family. Oh, whatever. I have that. What's disgusting about

a nice bottle of wine and some glasses? I can't even pronounce it. It's disgusting to me. I hate to do this to you guys. You're good, brother. I'm going to go rescue tj in the back over there i don't want to appreciate that he's got to go eat so thank you thank you for having me though me and rowan are having a nice combo oh dude and there's not going to be a single hiccup in this conversation because i know

that both of us are scared enough dudes see look at every person that walks by they're like what the fuck is that that's not the erica walked by and she thought, oh my God, this is something. We have something. We got something. Yeah, she's going to double the amount of money that goes into the act now. What? Do we get... I don't know.

I don't know. I was going to ask if there was anyone that was going into the act. So it seems like... I was handed a computer that has phone lines, but... Do you guys usually take calls? We've never taken calls since we've been at YouTube. So then let's not start taking calls. I think we should.

I think that we should. I don't know how we're going to, but I think that we should. And it's almost like we're going to treat this as rock bottom. What is Steven pointing towards? We're going to treat this as- Put the number on the screen. It's 646-291-2437. Please call in.

We're going to treat this as rock bottom, and I'd like to know what people did when they hit rock bottom, how they emerged from the doldrums that they were in, so we too might learn as a program how we can rise from these ashes. Have you had a rock before barstool? What would you consider your career, your professional rock bottom? I lost a rap battle once.

That's it? I mean, what do you, yeah, like, yeah, yeah. I feel like rock,

but people don't really bottom out and look at, and just like that, the phone lines are lit up like a freaking Christmas tree. Smoke's effect, baby. Have you ever seen this many smokes? This is the smoke's effect.

Smoke's effect, baby. You bring Tommy Smokes in, and the people... The people, they line up. They're dying to hear their own voice on a YouTube show. We know, as... At the Yak,

we never had this many callers. This is a lot of fucking callers. Summer Fridays with Smokes, the phone lines used to light up. They couldn't wait to talk to me. Really? Yeah. Okay, what kind of shit

were the people asking? Well, I'm trying to... I mean, there were some days we would do Barstool Radio and Tiac, Common Man Radio, where people would call up and tell us their mundane jobs that they did, basically. Yes, yes. That shit sounds uninteresting. Incredibly uninteresting.

But you learn a lot about different people, and it could take up some air time. And I think that you're one of the people in this office. I think that Eddie also falls into that category that takes pride in finding uninteresting things and making them interesting. Or it's like it's interesting to me. Like that's basically the premise of Thursday Thoughts, right? Like the most boring thoughts that you could think of and you kind of just put them into a video and see if they resonate with anybody.

Yeah. I can't tell where on the line of compliment and insult this is. It was at first it sounded like an insult, then a compliment, and then an insult that really was dipping back and forth. We also have the chef that's in the building who's going to be fighting Chef Donnie. From everything that I hear, he's scared. He doesn't want anybody to film him while he's working out. He wouldn't let people film him. I'm probably not supposed to say that, but also, like, I need to take the filter off right now.

Like, I can't be keeping information that I have. That's the thing about the app with Tommy Smokes. It's unfiltered. Yes, exactly. It's that raw shit. Take your dick out, Tommy. I don't bow down to political correctness. Yes, brother.

Thank you, man. And that's the shit that I love to hear. So that guy's in the building today. Maybe we'll get Chef Donnie later on. Ruffin Rowdy's coming up next weekend. Buy R&R.com. Pac-Man Jones against Bobby Lang. Chef against Chef.

This is as excited I've been for Ruffin Rowdy in a while. Because when you have a barstool fight combined with just a good old Ruffin Rowdy and a celebrity fight, that really is a killer combo. And Supreme Patty is fighting against that other dude who dances all the time. And that that shit's awesome shizat the rizat's fighting too right shizat the rizat the fucking knockout prince of rough and rowdy it's going to be in west virginia there's going to be no head gear he's like the mcgregor of ufc back in the day shizat's fighting i'm watching yes he's the mcgregor of ufc wouldn't he be like he is yeah yeah that's that would make more sense mcgregor is to uf if we're doing an analogy exactly colon ufc colon colon she's at the rizat colon rough and rowdy yes you understand yes exactly brother usually and and this guy has a call about crohn's disease if we're talking oh

my god i might have crohn's disease really yeah it's a possible i got something wrong with myself let's see if this works at all. Kyle is in Nova Scotia, and let's see if these call lines are going to work at all. Kyle, can you hear us? So, air one, Ron. Air one. Kyle, are you there? Yep.

Big Kyle, what's up? What's up, dog? So, we're talking colons, and you have Crohn's disease. That's the kind of segue. Tommy didn't even see the screen when he started talking colons. It absolutely and you have crohn's disease that's the kind of segue like tommy didn't even see the screen when he started talking colons it's just a natural it's a natural he's got a knack he's got a knack for the bullshit and uh dude let's talk about your bowel health absolutely i take like between five to ten shits a day okay most um the liquid uh viscosity if we're getting like talking physics here um yeah so it's pretty shitty pretty shitty situation nice it sounds awful um and i don't

is that what crones is because i feel like tommy shits like that i kind of have to poop a lot during the day i don't have diarrhea that much it's more just i shit a lot i get that feeling in my stomach i did recently have a c diff infection uh and i was on antibiotics for that but i could also have crohn's disease and i could be lactose intolerant what are the telltale signs kyle that you have crohn's disease because tommy's going to need to know this all right well tell me first of all if you're getting like some stomach cramps typically around a little lower than your belly button region on either side. That's not your stomach. That's not your stomach.

I get those. Yeah, not your stomach. That could be your intestines, small or large bowel. What else? If you start losing a lot of weight, that's another telltale sign. Not really. You're just getting so much shit and everything out, so you lose a lot of energy. You're just getting so much shit and everything out, you know, so you lose a lot of energy.

You're just getting so much, too much shit. Lethargy? It's a lethargy type of situation? Yeah, exactly. You got it. So, Kyle, why did you call in to talk about Crohn's disease? Because no one asked. Well, I told Zod I was more like a make-a-wish thing.

Okay. I have Crohn's disease, and being on the was more like a make-a-wish thing. Okay. Like, I have Crohn's disease, and, like, being on the act is, like, my make-a-wish thing. You know, some kids want to, you know, meet LeBron James or, you know, meet John Cena. You know, I just want to be on the act before Crohn's eventually takes me down. And you're calling from Nova Scotia, Argyle Street, right? No, I'm on the other side, Dartmouth. Oh, Dartmouth, dark side. That's that's day.

Okay, holy shit. I've been to Nova Scotia before in my lifetime. Yeah? Tell me about it. There's this place called John's Lunch, and it was the place I didn't used to like seafood beforehand. Dude, I'm literally like half a mile from John's Lunch. He's right by John's Lunch right now. This world ain't so big after all.

That's a fucking fact. My guy I work with knows John. What? Fact, I'm not lying. Get John to fucking fact. My guy I work with knows John. What? I'm not lying. Get John to call him. My grandmother's brave. I didn't like seafood before I had gone to Nova Scotia and I tried John's lunch, but it was a very when in Rome type of situation, and I was like, I'll give seafood a crack.

What'd you go with? I got the platter, so it was five different types of seafood, but there was a deep fried fish. And it's a good kind of training wheels into liking seafood at John's Lunch because everything is battered, dipped, like a funnel cake at a fair or something like that. So you're really just eating a lot of shortening and butter.

So you don't have like, you'll never have just a piece of salmon? Oh, I didn't. Now I'm obsessed with seafood. It turned me out. If it's seafood, you eat it. Yeah. Classic. That's what you bring Tommy on seafood, you eat it. Yeah. Classic.

That's what you bring Tommy on. That's why Tommy's here. That's why Tommy's here. You know, the seafood. I had a fat hunk of bronzino last night. Oh, my God. But it was already deboned, though, was the only thing about the bronzino. Well, don't you want it deboned?

No, I like to take it right off the bone myself. I'm too afraid to choke if it's not deboned. Yeah, that would kill you for sure. For sure. Fishbone would bring me down. Then a safari for sure. Eyes on the prize right now. Well, you keep looking over there, and it makes me look over there.

I know, but you need to focus. I'm just focused on this microphone and this brain. And Kyle from Nova Scotia. So, Kyle, how likely are you to die off this Crohn's shit? Usually it only takes like maybe five years off your lifespan. But you know, hey,

that's five years I'll never get back. So I just gotta live every day to the fullest. Well, you could just not smoke or whatever and that might be able

to get you over the hump right there. Do you ever have a colonoscopy? Oh yeah. I get those like every two years. They suck. I might be due for get you over the hump right there. Do you ever have a colonoscopy? Oh, yeah. I get those every two years. They suck. I might be due for one of those soon.

That seems like an unpromising adventure. Oh, man. I almost died getting a colonoscopy once. Oh, all right. I don't want to hear that. No, I don't want to hear that. No, let's just get all the unpleasantries out of the way right now. You tell us how you almost died, and that'll be the end of the death and poop talk, and also no more Taliban action.

Okay, absolutely. Yeah, I'm sure that may not be up to everyone listening. But, yeah, so I was getting a colonoscopy. So obviously, you know, for people that don't know what a colonoscopy is, basically they stick something up your ass, a little camera, to kind of see what's going on down there. I thought it was like a hose. It pretty much is a hose, yeah. But, like, when on down there and occasionally they take a biopsy it pretty much is a hose yeah but like when i was doing it they had a camera because they were trying to see you know what's what's going on with my Crohn's up there and they're taking a biopsy as

well and when they took the biopsy um some air got into um my, like some oxygen, and an oxygen bubble went right to my liver and kind of almost killed me. If it would have went to my heart, I would have died right away. Yeah, I'm never going back to the gastroenterologist. Yeah, my stomach was like inflamed. I looked like I had a huge pot belly. I don't remember any of this. That's hilarious.

Yeah, my mom said I looked green. It was pretty serious shit. No pun intended. But you made it now, and now you're on the other side. Yeah, I made it. I'm all good now. Still got the Crohn's, but, you know, didn't die via the colonoscopy. I feel that's one of the worst ways to go, probably.

Well, brother, I 100% appreciate you calling in. We'd love to be able to fulfill a make-a-wish type of situation. And also, I'm going to need you to do me a favor. The computer that I was using to take these calls got taken away from me, so I can't hang up on you. So I'm going to need you to hang up on yourself. But, Kyle, anytime you want to call in when it's me and Tommy Smokes and we're doing the phone lines.

It should be at least twice a week going forward. Yeah, it's going to be more regular. It's going to kind of fall in right after Pick Central. Just be a regular caller. We have all the negative stuff out of the way, and now we'll just be able to have fun back and forth whenever we call in next time. Absolutely. We can shoot the shit, just the three of us, whenever it's just Tommy Smokes and Roan.

Dark side. On the yak. Dark side. And I just hung up on him bang just like that hey we fulfilled the make-a-wish today yeah i feel good about myself i feel great about myself dude a lot of people like to talk i'm the king of stomach issues you know to that community so we have uh we have a gang of calls and i'm going to read them off to you and you tell me which one we want to take okay we could talk to charlie who wants to talk about his rock bottom out in la john wants to talk talk to me i don't even know about what carson neighborhood eats in maine he wants to talk about that not enough kevin oklahoma tommy talk

women let's let's take that one let's take that one i had a feeling that's where you were gonna kevin what's up my brother? Kevin calling from Oklahoma. Oklahoma recently number two in the polls right now. Big time to be a Sooner and an even bigger time for you to be on the radio. What's going on, Kev? That's right, man. Boomer Sooner. This is our year.

Yes, brother. That's what I've been saying. This is your year. Horns down, am I right? But more importantly, you got Tommy Smokes on the line right now. So get it off your chest, Big Kev. What do you want to talk to Tommy about? It's been on my chest.

So, Tommy, what is your infatuation with these behemoths of women, these 6'3", 6'4", women? Okay, the people haven't gotten to talk to Tommy about his Brittany Griner obsession. She was like 6'1". She could touch the rim with her feet flat on the ground. It wasn't that crazy. She was a tall glass of water. There's no way around it.

But, you know, I mean, she was a pretty girl. She was a nice girl. She was only like an inch taller than me. I think the – She could wrap her arms around a sequoia and touch her fingertips. That's good protection. I don't think that that's that crazy. And I also think that since then you've kind of been shamed out of uh

your flat colossal stage and you haven't been able to i wouldn't say that was a stage it was like one night i wasn't aggressively seeking six foot women dude but people are in your life i think nothing wrong with it exactly i uh i just i wonder if tommy smokes is compensating in some area to to get these giant women i think that he knows that giant women have deep-set vaginas, and with Tommy's... The only vagina deep enough to handle is cock. Now, I have to ask... I wish I could hang up on you.

Did winning Survivor help you acquire these women? I don't know about that specifically. I would say, in general, working at Barstool is certainly a help. I don't know how you would break it down to different facets, but it didn't hurt. Here's how you would break it down. Would you have gotten these women if you didn't work at Barstool? Oh, heavens no. I was just saying I don't know what parts of working at Barstool specifically helped different things.

That is a perfect breakdown. So, Tommy, what's the shortest woman you've ever been with? Averagely short. Nothing drastically short. Five foot, five one, somewhere average. Wait, five one or five five? Five foot, he said. Five foot or five one.

You're average a little below average height. Gotcha. Nothing crazy. I was thinking that the following weekend I went back to the Jersey Shore, if I hooked up with like a midget, that would have balanced things out. Are you allowed to say that? I thought it's in Zah's Twitter handle. I'm not allowed to say that?

Zah's allowed to say whatever Zah wants to say. To me, that sounds so much better than all the other options. What was the worst part about your wedding ron what a weird question was there a worst part why do you want to hear the negatives of a great day well no i was gonna ask you what was the best part but i know the best part sex is that what you mean the sex oh i have i have a question for you ron the the thank you so much for the call, Kevin. The worst part was that it ended so soon.

I appreciate you, my brother, that Tommy wasn't there. Couldn't make it. What's your question? I recently was asked to be a best man. Shut up. I want to be a best man. Congratulations, Tommy. Thank you. A wedding in December 2022.

So I have quite a bit of time to prepare for it. And to get a little bit more jacked, unless it's the Crones, in which case you will not be able to get more jacked. Well, also, I'll be in a suit, so it won't matter too much. Who was your best man, and did he have a good speech? And what would you give as advice? Have you been a best man? I've never been a best man. Ooh, sorry to hear that.

You have no friends. No, I have so many friends, and they all have brothers. I come from a herd of men who breed men all the men that i'm around are linked up with other men but son of a boy dad son of a boy dad exactly thank you so much uh steven but uh my or my best man crushed it he did a fantastic job just a friend or brother uh close friend friend named mike and he just he took care of business up there. He just had the right tone to his speech. He made it funny. He kind of played off of the maid of honor said that she was going to do a rap in her speech,

and then she just read a poem or something, and then he spun off of it. He's like, you know what? I'm going to do a rap too, and then he just kind of did a little bit of a poem, and it was very funny. Everybody was laughing. his delivery was excellent but you have to just be yourself but you also can't wing it you just simply cannot wing it oh i've started writing it already yeah it's gonna be a 15th month speech yeah but it shouldn't be a 15 minute speech though i think being concise is also very important three minutes i think three minutes is kind of a sweet spot if you start droning on you just have

to be hitting either a ton of comedy or you need to be pulling at people's heartstrings if you're like the thing i hate about wedding speeches and when they're like yeah in sixth grade they played soccer and then in eighth grade she tried out for the play and she wound up making the play it's like you don't have to go over the highlight reel of somebody's life or every memory that you have of the person poignant stuff that can maybe be roped back into either a meaning, a punchline, or something wedding related. I feel like that's the money way. So here's my thing. I think that there's going to be a lot of expectation for me to give the funniest speech ever.

Tommy Smokes from Barstool? Yes. He's the fucking man. Yes. Have you seen his videos? Have you seen his blogs? He's the funniest guy on the internet. Sexy. He's going to fucking kill it. And he's so fucking man. Have you seen his videos? Have you seen his blogs? He's the funniest guy on the internet. He's going to fucking kill it.

And he's so handsome too. So I think that the expectations that way are going to be high where I'm never going to be able to reach that. I think I surprise people. I'll do a little light comedy but go a little more emotional than people think. Really get into it and sort of surprise people that way and and leave an impression in that manner instead oh really i think that could work no i i think that that's going to set people up for a massive disappointment i think that people are going to be emotional enough i don't know i think people are going to expect something funny so why don't you just work on

making something fun because i don't think it's going to be as funny as people expect i can't live up to those but you have 15 months how do you already think you're gonna fail you need to at least give yourself i mean i've often said a wedding is about the best man that it's his day people remember that speech more than anything cheat code self-deprecate yeah but it's not about me the speech it's about them i think you start deprecate the groom yeah i'm gonna do that i already hate the groom i already have a beautiful deprecate the shit out of yourself I'm going to do that. Deprecate the groom. I already have a good. Deprecate the shit out of yourself. I already have a pretty good opening line where, so I know I'm going to go first because the maid of honor, it's going to be her sister.

She's related. Yeah. Right. So it's like I go first sort of set the stage or I could do something where it's like, you know, I'm glad the one that I'm glad I'm the one that's going first because I'm sure the maid of honor of this really emotional, deep speech that's going to tug at heartstrings and I don't even like Brian that much. Something like that. Could that work to start off? because I'm sure the Maid of Honor will have this really emotional, deep speech that's going to tug at heartstrings. I don't even like Brian that much.

Something like that. Could that work to start off? I think that could maybe play. You're saying that you don't like him that much? Yeah, being like, Brian, I don't even like him that much. That's just a little way to set the stage now. It's a joke, obviously.

I know, but that's not even that much of a joke, though. No, it's a joke. I like him. I'm his best man. Yeah, but that's like uh i don't know man i think if i hit it right okay well again i have 15 months to workshop every time you're writing a thursday thought add in just one maybe i'll just do writing maybe i'll just do my thursday thoughts that we can never address that i'm at a wedding thursday thoughts about weddings or about the couple or some shit like that something that's a little

bit more on brand we're already moving in the right direction but we have a special report right now uh phone lines obviously the numbers right there on the screen you can call in the lines are absolutely lit up it's a veritable menorah right here but uh we need to kind of move somebody god damn it every time i touch this shit i don't know what's happening but we have have Fun Anthony on the line. Here we go. Oh, shit. We have Fun Anthony on the line from DJs, and he has a report about KB at DJs. Do you know Fun Anthony personally, Tommy? Yes, I do.

I've met him many times over the summer. Well, Fun Anthony, it is an absolute pleasure to talk to you, and you're on the act right now, so break it down. Bro, what's going on, brother? How you been? I'm fantastic. Tommy, what's going on, brother? How you been? I'm fantastic. Tommy, what's up, man? What's up, Fun Anthony? Good to hear that voice.

I missed you. You guys are doing a lot better than KB. So originally I was going to call in to talk about how KB was a disappointment taking his first ever grail on Saturday night. Then he totally redeemed himself last night. But I guess it went a little too far because sunday fun day i guess got the best of him because he's not in the office he's not in the office right now that is a fact for sure but can you tell us slow it down a little bit what's a grail and how did he

mess up because there's already murmurs around the office bubbling around the office that he got a grail and he sipped it i honestly wouldn't know what to do unless someone told me beforehand so why don't you set the stage on the grail a little bit, Anthony? So as Tommy knows, the grail is the DJ's version of a mind erasure. It's delicious. So it's served in a cup, two straws. You get it. You

chug it down with the two straws, one sip. And you just have to muscle it down. Muscle it down. Saturday night, KB, hand him his first grail. He's sipping on it. One, two sips. He night, KB, hand him his first grail. He's sipping on it, one, two sips. He's still got a full cup. I'm like, KB, what are you doing?

I got to chug this thing. He's like, I can't chug. So fast forward, I guess Jeff D'Lo gave him some advice. They come in yesterday, Sunday Funday. Now, last night I gave him a pink Whitney grail for the brand. Okay, for the brand. Love that. And instead of two in the two straws, he went no straw chug, took the whole thing down like for the brand. Love that. And instead of doing the two straws,

he went no straw, took the whole thing down like a champ. Really? Wow. Maybe it was a little too much because it might have got the best of him. Yeah, I was hearing that you were going to be calling in, that you were going to be talking to KB, and then I heard that KB's not going to be here,

and I got worried that Fun Anthony wasn't going to call in because, first of all, you were going to call in. It was predetermined that you were going to call in, and we haven't taken calls in almost a full year. So the fact that you knew that we were going to be able to take calls today, but also that KB wasn't going to be there, I was getting nervous. I was getting a little bit of trepidation. No, man.

I had to step it up. I had to step it up for you guys. I appreciate that. I know you're shorthanded. I appreciate that. I had to come through. So you got a lot of... Oh, please, go ahead, please.

Well, I was saying to KB that you guys maybe the Friday Labor Day weekend we do a live Yak Friday vibes from DJs. God damn, that sounds awesome. That sounds freaking elite. I mean, you gotta pitch that to Big Cat,

but, you know, you get the crew. We set you guys up on stage, and we have our DJ just play the vibes as they come in. Yes, and we're throwing napkins. We're sucking down grails. We're sucking down grails. Yeah, the whole nine. It sounds incredible. I feel like this has been the biggest summer for DJs as far as barstool employees coming through there.

It used to be kind of a niche thing. If you knew, you knew. But now it seems like everybody's been through there. Who are some highlights of people who have come through, who have really shined when they came into DJs, and who are some of the people that kind of need to step it up a little bit? Well, Jeff D'Lo is the MVP. That guy, he's there.

He's been there almost every weekend comes through he crashed at the house a weekend i say glenny bulls is a close second but he kind of disappointed me to show up this weekend oh no eddie eddie eddie was a great guest although he couldn't handle the full saturday you know the past crazy djs eddie had to tap a little early but you know but Thursday was a little slower, not as crazy. It was more his vibe. Okay. The biggest disappointment, though, is we're still waiting for Big Cat to make his appearance. Oh, yeah. What's Big Cat doing?

The people keep asking, when's Big Cat coming? And that's, you know, maybe a little Friday vibes live. Big Cat and the whole Yacht crew. It sounds incredible. I mean, the way the Friday vibes has kind of unfolded, unfortunately, we don't necessarily have the rights to as much music, but I'm kind of of the mind that we should just set up a burner YouTube account, put out the link, and just do a Friday vibes off of a kind of pirate radio unsanctioned type of vibe. That's not a bad idea.

I'm not sure if that's going to be able to happen, but we should try and make that happen. How about any of the ladies from Barstool? Have any of the women come through DJs this summer, Fun Anthony? We had Casey. We had Kelly Keegs. We had Rhea.

All good vibes, hanging out, having a good time. I love that. Took Grail down like a champ, better than KB. Yeah, KB needs to get good time. I love that. Took Grail down like a champ. Better than KB. Yeah, KB needs to get it together. I'll be honest. I think I might have sipped a Grail as well just because it is really delicious,

and I'm also not a big chugger. So sometimes as the night goes on, you just got to take it slow. It's a wedding room, though. I'm not something. That's when you go – when you want to sip the Grail, you go double up, and you get the big grail. And then you sip on the big grail. Okay, maybe that, see, I didn't know that that was a thing.

That could be my move now going forward. Is it a special cup? I'm picturing like an actual grail, like a holy grail, like Indiana Jones type situation. Is it a grail like that? It's not, but we could incorporate that into, just for you, Rome, you show up, we have a special Holy Grail Cup, your first grail out of the Holy Grail. It might be a BYO chalice. I might just roll up with a chalice

at DJ's. Listen, you're more than welcome. We'll make that happen. Fun Anthony, I appreciate you calling, my guy. You are good vibes at all times, and we're gonna try and get the yak down there. I don't know the logistics. We'll see if Big Cat's into it, but the fact that he's disappointed

you this summer, that's not okay, and he's not going to like that. He's going to want to rectify that situation. Yeah, we definitely need a Big Cat appearance. We need one Big Cat appearance before the summer's over. Love that. Appreciate you, Fun Anthony, and Tommy will be back down soon. He'll be throwing napkins, fist pumping,

levels, everything. I was born for the shore. Love that. Sounds good, boys. Is that true? Were you born for the shore? Oh, no, no, no, no, no. No, it was fun, but, I mean, I hit a wall when I go out

where it's like I get a little tired and my stomach hurts. I like going out and having a good time, but there was one weekend we were down there three nights in a row. That was too much for me. Yeah, you're not built for that. And also, you need to kind of be at a nice shore house

to be able to recuperate after a long, just being in the throes of it and sharing beds. Right. DJs is fun. It gets crowded, too, so you got to be prepared for that,

but all the bars down there get crowded. So it's a fun time. I don't know if I was born for it. And at least you could probably get like to the front of the line or some shit like that like you're not waiting in line oh yeah

I mean Fun Anthony he's the he's the pluck is he? yeah Fun Anthony he walks us right through salute to Fun Anthony and also you were probably

weren't getting as much rest because of all the all the sex you all the sex you have yeah I don't like sharing beds with women if we're being honest I don't sleep well you don't like sharing beds with women, if we're being honest. I don't sleep well.

You don't like sharing beds with women? So you prefer to share a bed with a man? You'd sleep better? Yeah, probably. Pete, Pete, come on in. Pete. What have you done with your life? That's what I'm saying.

The Yak used to be such a proud program. Just onto the mic, onto the mic, because we needed that badly. The Yak was such a proud program. I think we're having Onto the mic because we literally needed that badly. The act was such a proud program. I think we're having a good show. What's going on? That's what I'm saying. It's literally that bad.

Where is everybody? No, no, no. Where is everybody? Where's Owen? Big Cat's on Grit Week. Okay. Owen is with KB. Where's KB?

KB's not here. Where's Nick? Nick is with his straight dad. Brandon Walker is somewhere. I don't know. What's going on? And I literally asked like eight other people out there.

No, no. Like three others. Three others. I asked Jeff D. Lowe. I asked Donnie. I asked Trent. I asked Frankie. They're never going to do it.

But I'm saying I've asked a lot of people. I actually was kind of hoping that you would come through because this is like early on in the act it was like we would lean on Pete for some reason.

We're going to have to delete the tapes. Che wants you. Owen will be here in 10 minutes with an announcement about tomorrow's show. I don't know what it is. It sounds ominous. Wow. Who's going to be here?

Owen's going to be here with an announcement about tomorrow's show. I don't know how Owen even has... Cancel it. Yeah, because... If we go through another one of these, we're doing the phone calls. Why?

Just because... Cancel it because it'll never live up to the hype of today's show of how good it was? No, because nobody's here. And it's just bad. I was going to say, what have you guys... I was like, there's no way that this is happening right now. But it's 1.43. You guys have been on the air. I feel like I've been on for 10 minutes.

You guys have been on the air for 43 minutes. What have you been talking about? We're taking calls. We just talked to Fan Anthony. We're talking about Crohn's disease. That's how bad it is. We're talking about irritable bowel syndrome. Best man speeches we've covered at all.

Are we required to do 60 minutes or can we just – Can we do two hours? Unfortunately, there's so many callers. There's so many callers that we have to get through. Phone lines are full. They really are, but that's just the first time that we've had phone callers since we've done this. Do you want me to just bounce a feed and make it spin and everybody Fs in the chat and everybody leaves? The people would get mad at you about that kind of thing.

I think people are loving it. I haven't gotten any good feedback yet, but I'm sure people are loving it at the end of the day. Don't do that. Don't do that. That's not a good idea. I need you to be present. It really is that bad. We're probably drowning in

there used to be a phones down rule in this room and pete wasn't the yak like once kind of like a proud program i've never i've never seen it but but as people like seeing it when we were just an audio show yeah when we were on serious it was kind of like people liked it it's one of two shows there there were two shows that went serious left left, they said, we've got to keep these. These are the flagships that are going to carry us forward post-Sirius. One was Pick Central, hosted by Brandon Walker. And two was The Yak, hosted by a merry band of misfits. Where's Sass? I forgot about Sass.

Yeah, where is Sass? Sass is in Wyoming. What's he doing? H'm hiking working in a kitchen he's like fucking it look at all these people that it could be and then look at what it is i'm so disappointed my fucking fall plans and the fucking delta variant that's that's a new that's a new graphic caleb's out yes caleb's out what do you think about that no i mean it's time to update the graphic then yeah i mean that's what i mean caleb's out. What do you think about that? No, I mean, it's time to update the graphic then. Yeah. I mean, that's what I mean.

Caleb's out. What do you think about him being out? That's fine. The act does change hosts more than any other program I think that we have. Because it's bigger than... It was bigger. It was bigger. It was supposed to be bigger.

Are we adding my face on tomorrow? I just cannot believe that we're down to one. I guess Chase here. I'm looking at the thing of eight people and we're down to two. Yeah guess Chase here. I'm looking at the thing of eight people, and we're down to two. Yeah, it's incredible. It's dire. And the bullpen is thin. It's time.

Days back today, it's just like, what's going on? It's just Dan Plesak is the only reliever that we have. You're not Mariano. We only got one guy in the bullpen, but he's the greatest closer of all time. You asked a bunch of people, and Tommy was the only one not doing anything. I am the only player that would drop everything to be on any program. So Dave was recording in that room right over there.

Did you just want to get seen doing something? Roan came over to me. He said, Tommy, nobody else is here today. I need somebody that would say yes that's going to carry this program. And he said, hell, if you do good, you might be on this show full time. I think that's how it works. I think that's how all of this happened. Right.

Someone did well. It was four people. Three people weren't there. So pull in Owen. Right. And it's like, guess what, Owen? You're on the show. Pull in Nick.

Right. Well, you pull in KB, and then you're pulling in Nick. And then people like Nick more than KB. So now you've got Nick and KB. That's what we need for you to tell it straight like it is. No, I got to go. I'm going to let you guys get back to whatever you were doing. Before you go, last question.

What do you think about my comparison between you and Austin, Dave's guy? I compare – I think that you guys are on the same – you guys kind of are on the same wavelength. Yeah, wow. Am I lying? No, I see exactly where you're coming from there's a lot of that do you take that tall insult tall handsome yes uh you know very good at our jobs smart yeah you forgot smart yep i feel like he's a smart guy do you think he's smart yeah yeah he's smart where would you put him percentile wise as far as smarties in the office

i don't know top up there yep top one five? It's tough to say. Okay. Pete, you're released. Hold on. Che wants to say something. He can talk whenever. There's literally so much. Pete can hear me. I want Pete to comment about the photo that surfaced of him in a tube shirtless looking kind of jacked. You did look jacked.

You were broad chested. There's something about the tube and the way that there's like a pillow and back and it i suck in and i pop it a little bit it's like the men's fitness whenever you see a men's fitness magazine and the guy on the cover is like uh flexing up like this it means that he has titties and that he's trying to pick up his titties and the same thing yeah so like the the uh pillow and back kind of pop pop props me up a little bit. It's like when a woman with big boobs lays on her back and her breasts kind of meld into her bodice

kind of type of situation. Something like that. That's what's going on with you. And I was sucking in. And you were sucking in. Yeah. Well, you look great. Actually, maybe the best picture

you've taken as far as body-wise, as far as how good you look in your body. Yeah. I'm a little chubby right now, so it's tough. In that picture, you looked not as chubby. Good. All right.

Good luck for the rest of the show. Please let us get back to the masterpieces. Ladies and gentlemen. Sorry to interrupt your conversation. Rude interruption. My apologies. Will in Kentucky wants to talk about sex tips from Tommy. Will, you are on the line right now, and I have Tommy Smokes in here right now.

Call him Mommy. You're talking to tommy tommy what's good what's up so listen listen i'm a virgin never had sex before not with a voice like that you're not a girl meeting up with a girl i don't believe you today i don't believe you what are you prove you're a virgin how old are you dude i'm 18 years old. My dick is probably four soft, five and a half hard. I haven't got any pussy with that. But I found this girl on Tinder. In two days, she's letting me come over. I need to know what to do to please her, Tommy.

How tall is she? It's Tinder, so she says she's 5'6", but you can add an inch. She's probably about 6 feet. You never know. Yeah. That's what I'm thinking. Yeah, yeah. Women typically go down about 6 inches on those apps.

I would bring a stand that someone does the kickoffs off of in the NFL. And have sex with her with that? No, I would put it underneath her chin while you ate her out, and have sex with her with that? No, I would put your, I'll put it underneath her chin while you ate her out and I would eat her out for about 90 minutes. Yeah. You always got to start with an eat out sesh.

And that's what you call it. I need, I need Tommy's. Tommy gets the pussy, not Roan. Yeah. I need Tommy. Yeah.

Roan's married. He's got, he's got one girl for the rest of his life. Me, unlimited pussies. So tell me, how do you please? So you're,

you're going to walk in, you're gonna walk in you're gonna announce yourself you're gonna do small talk for an hour bring some of your best material uh and then you say all right i'm ready to begin uh are you are and you have to ask are you willing to have sexual intercourse with me and she'll say yes and you have to ask are you have sound mind and body yes you have to bring a breathalyzer, make sure she's okay. And then every five minutes, every five minutes you follow up. Are you sure you're still willing to have sexual intercourse with me?

And how are you enjoying your experience so far? So just ask her one at a time. During the sexual intercourse, do I ask if she's enjoying it? Oh, yes, definitely. So you're going to start eating that pussy for, what does Stu say? How long does Stu say for?

30, 30, 30 or 15, 15, 15. 15, 30, 30. 15, 15. You're going to go eating that pussy for, what does Stu say? How long does Stu say for? 30, 30, 30 or 15, 15, 15. 15, 30, 30. 15. You're going to want to go down on that puss for about 90 minutes probably. Because here's the thing about sex with girls. They don't come. That's a myth. Girls are incapable of having an orgasm.

So you're going to be down there for probably about 90 minutes. Again, you're going to check in every two to three minutes. Make a lot of eye contact too while you're looking. Say, is this good? Is this good, baby? Do you like this? Things like that. If you're on a baby message, I think baby's kind of weird to say, especially if you don't know the girl that well. So you're going to eat her out for about 90. You're going to ask them to take a break, maybe a snack, brush your teeth, and then you're going to engage in some good old-fashioned sexual intercourse. Does that make sense, Will? Does that sound good?

Okay, so basically what I'm taking away is I got to bring a breathalyzer, some snacks for in between eating pussy sessions. You don't want a snack because then you have a full stomach. One time I was unable to finish because my stomach hurt and I had to just tell the girl that. She was like, what's wrong? And I said, to be honest, I got a really bad stomach ache. I actually believe you.

This is definitely actually true. It's an absolutely true story, and she was really insulted and really felt down about herself, and I said, it's nothing. It's just I got a bad stomach, and I'm not going to be able to continue performing. Did you tell her it was probably Crohn's? Did you explain your bowel history? This is before I thought it was probably Crohn's. We knew each other.

I said, you know I have acid reflux you know how this gets and uh you know but it was giving you acid reflux what is she you know if we had gone drinking earlier in the night i get acid reflux and then by the end of the night it drips down into my stomach and i have a bloated stomach so you need to kind of uh the same way that some guys will put a viagra in their pocket in case they're gonna fuck you need to put a tums in your pocket in case you're going to fuck. Well, Bill, I hope that you got all the information that you needed from Tommy. I feel like that was pretty sage

information. Sage advice from you, Tommy. Yeah. What are we going to have him on for fucking ever? We have women on the line that want to talk to you, Tommy. Let's go to three. We could. Caitlin in New York wants to talk to Tommy Smokesy this show is flying i'm not gonna let's go to three we could caitlin in new york wants to talk to tommy smokes caitlin what's up what's up guys i'm

women's basketball team i think tommy smoke kind of knows the deal um i wanted to ask we'll say thank you for giving us a shout out on your blog when we're all shut down this year because of covid but um i guess my question is what advice do you have for fordham athletics ever becoming more serious in their sports and kind of what was your experience with us oh i thought you were saying shout out to tommy because he likes tall girls that's what i thought what do you mean tommy knows the deal you just mean because i went to fordham yeah but you also shouted us out on your um yeah yeah well that was so dumb when fordham they tried to like shut down fordham athletics are horrible the one good sport we have is fordham women's

basketball the only people that win shit there and last year there was like i don't even think there was a covid case on the team there were like three covid cases on campus and that somehow made them shut down women's basketball season when they're about to go to the tournament that's absolute bullshit and it's just not fair um i have a question are there any single ladies on the team that maybe tommy could um you know explore the the clouds a lot of graduates that might be uh this that are, I think, a good suit. Okay. Okay.

That could be perfect, Tommy. You know, you don't shit where you eat, and I guess I don't go to Fordham anymore, but I worked with a lot of great people there at Fordham, and it was a fun time. I do think for Fordham to get better at athletics, we need to have a more savage atmosphere at the Rose Hill Gym, sort of make it the Bronx Zoo, bring in a lot of Italian mobsters off Arthur Avenue, and just make it a more intimidating place to play for the opposing team.

Caitlin, what do you think? How's that sound? Yeah, that's fair enough. And Rome, can I ask you one more quick question? Of course, we have all the time in the world. What do you mean? Well, I seriously am in love with Son of a Boy Dad, and I need to know when you guys are going to start dropping 2, 3, 4 episodes

a week because it's just too good oh my god I have a special treat and announcement and I have to go because we're short on time but we are actually going to be dropping multiple episodes of Son of a Boy Dad this week we're just going to drop another episode because

you know what and we've already recorded this week. We're just going to drop another episode because you know what? F it. And we've already recorded this week's episode, but I was talking to Sass this weekend and he said there's so much goddamn juice up in Wyoming. There's so many good stories that are just popping up into his life that are just flowing from his every pore

that we're going to have to record again. So we'll be able to talk to him. And Caitlin, thank you so much for the call. Please keep on calling in. Call on every show all right see you caitlin and just like that owen walks into the building owen freshly freshly on the uh about halfway there yeah we're gonna go to three two hours we have uh we have a pretty stacked call list right now. Everybody's dying to get in contact with us. Oh, hell yeah. But Owen, how are you?

Where have you been? And what can you tell us? So he can't tell us anything is what I'm gathering from that first. You know what I'm gonna? I was at the emergency room for about six to seven hours. And I'll leave it at that for now but we'll get into it tomorrow okay um i already told people who you were with earlier so you just gave a location and uh is is everything okay we don't know who it was yeah yeah no they know it's they know it's kb we said

oh with kb it could have been me. That was in the hospital. It wasn't, but it could have been. 50-50 shot. Yeah. So we're good. You're good. I was always good.

You were always good, and we're kind of royal we are good. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, perfect. All right, great. That's great. I feel like that's great. Yeah, it's good.

Is it good? Yeah, I think it'll be a funny show tomorrow. I hope so because it'll be just me, you, and... The four of us. So the three of us. No, we're actually going to... We're not going to have you on anymore, Tommy. Okay.

I feel like this was a good time. But you can stay on for the rest of this show. We have five more calls to rip through. It's going to be... You can come in on Wednesday. You and Frank can come in on Wednesday. I feel like there's going to be no show on Wednesday. Frank even came to the door earlier, and I didn't – yeah.

Okay. Charlie in L.A. wants to tell us about a rock bottom that he's gone through. I just feel obligated to our callers to take these callers. You know, you people have hung on the line the entire time. Charlie, you were right there from the rip. So let's talk about Rock Bottom, because this has kind of been this show's Rock Bottom today. Yeah, it sure has.

First time caller, long time listener. Love you boys. Rock Bottom was being come over on this Monday morning and tuning in to the acting team. Tommy freaking smokes. That's funny. That's funny. That's one way to start the week, but the only way to get out of rock bottom

is to keep on going. Luckily, we got Rowan in the house, Zaw killing it on the ones and twos. Tommy killed it. Owen can't wait to hear what's going on tomorrow. Tommy, sometimes we just got to do better. Yeah, well, I killed it today. Thanks for tuning in.

It's only up from here, bud. Exactly. If you're going through hell, keep going. That's what I say. But, Charlie, do you have any predictions of what the story is going to be tomorrow? Yeah, I'll field guesses. Cocaine overdose. No.

No. God, no. Drugs were not involved. I don't think you can overdose on cocaine. But I appreciate... I need two swats. Up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up. You got one guess.

That is a blessed life of Charlie if that's his rock bottom. Great life. I don't know. It's been bad. No, no, it's been good. Yeah, it's been bad. Come on, honest with you.

How have we done, bro? It's been flying by. I watched the first few minutes and then our sweet boy Kyle was released. And I was like, I think I can make it there. Oh, wait, he's out? Yeah.

So where's he at? I just dropped him home. Well, why is he at home? Why is he in here? If he's good to go, then he's good to go. I thought it would be a good cliffhanger. Can he play? We've got to stretch this week out a little bit.

That is true because it's thin. Xander in Illinois has a question for Steve. And you're in luck, my friend, because we have Steve right here. Awesome, awesome. Hey, guys. Big fan. Thank you. So, Steven.

You're lying, but that's polite to say. It's nice to say. Yeah, Tommy, probably send your Thursday thoughts video out to more people than I should. Oh, yeah. How often? Do you send any of my stuff to anybody? Owen, sorry. I'm kidding.

I don't have stuff. I feel like that's honest. I feel like that was very honest. Yeah. I like you a lot more than Charlie. What's your worst NFL take? For instance, this year I said that, or I said last year that Aaron Rodgers was going to take a step back

and the Buccaneers would go 6-10. Sorry. No, good. Good question. So did Brandon. Good question. So what do you think, Steven? What's your worst NFL take, Ben?

Historically? Historically. I didn't think Patrick Mahomes was going to be that good. Steven, don't you have multiple football podcasts? I mean, I do, but things set up for him pretty well. I thought Deshaun Watson was the best quarterback in that draft class. I mean, he's very good. Obviously, he has some issues right now.

But, yeah, I wasn't big on the Patrick Mahomes train. Wow. I was surprised when he went on. I don't know where I had him versus Mitch off the top of my head. They were very close. I mean, hey, a lot of people missed on Mitch. Mitch was the hot guy coming out. I thought Deshaun Watson should have been the top quarterback in that draft class.

But, you know, things happen how they happen. And good for Patrick Mahomes. I think sitting a year certainly helped for him. But yeah i mean he went to a great situation has made the most visibility so i'm happy for him xander thank you for the call my brother and you can hear more steven che talking about football on both going deep and the fantasy football factory which will be coming out with its inaugural episode of this season the premiere later on this week featuring steven che and tomorrow morning ben. It'll be coming out tomorrow morning. Keep your eyes tuned for

another afternoon and after dinner, Mince, later on today about that. I'm going to get through these fucking calls. Tommy, how tall is too tall? Tripp in South Carolina wants to know. Tripp, ask him yourself. I kind of stole your thunder there, huh?

Mr. Vape God, just want to know how tall is too tall for a lover? What was the question? How tall is too tall for a lover? 6'8". I think I would draw the line at 6'8". Ask him one more time, Tripp. I don't think he heard it. How tall is too tall for a woman you're making love with?

Yeah, I think you've got to cut it off around 60%. Why? Why do you have to cut it out at that height? No, you just have to get creative. I'm not a heightist. Yeah, exactly. Any woman of any height, I'd be lucky to have them. That's the right answer.

Any height, though? Oh, yeah. Well, under two foot? No, I mean... So you are a heightist. They're obviously of age. No one said anything about age. Owen was implying.

I wasn't. Your mind went there. You went there. All right. Any women between over four and a half feet? I don't know. Tripp, appreciate the call. Great stuff all by big Tripp.

Stop talking. Patrick wants to talk about battle rap, and I accidentally hung up on him instead of letting him on the air. But that actually makes things a little bit easier because we've got to get out of here because I need to go to a dentist appointment. Canyon wants to talk to Tommy Smokes. It is almost 2.30. I know. Canyon wants to talk to Tommy Smokes.

I don't think that went over Roan's head. Roan doesn't really have that sophisticated humor. I actually think that that joke is racist. Okay. Let's move on. I think it's classist. Yeah, exactly. So Canyon wants to talk to Tommy Smokes.

Canyon. Who doesn't? What's up, guys? Rowan, big fan of you. Is this Jeff Nadeau? Tommy, I'm here for you. I'm on your behalf. I'm watching the chat.

You know, there's a lot of negativity going your way. Impossible. I'm not going to lie. That's usually me. But I want to play devil's advocate here and instill some confidence in you. I want you to take a look at that TV behind you, and I want you to imagine being a staple on the Yak. And tell me that you can't see that, and tell me who you could replace.

That's going to be me one day. I'm not going to replace anyone. That A in Yak is just going to be my face. Your triangular-ass face. If the Yak was capped at eight people, what do you do? Do you just submit? The yak's been capped at three. It's been capped at four.

It's been capped at five. No, the cap is eight. Who would you take off? Who would I take off here? You know what? I can't do that to any of my guys. You're my friends. You're my brothers.

So you'd take yourself off? I would take myself off. I would do the same thing. I'd bow out. Appreciate you calling in, Canyon. Always some deep shit from you, my boy. Jake in Boston wants to talk about a shitty internship. Jake.

What's up, boys? Yo. Yo, Jake. What's up, brother? Well, between Tommy, Smoke's sex life, and and bowel movements i don't know if i can really compete but i'm really glad to have combined the two can i guess your age by your voice can i guess your age can you guess it go ahead you're 17 i'm not i'm 20 what shut up you're white though you're white i'm mixed okay just kidding i'm white your name is jake but uh anyways i've had

this shitty internship and it's so bad but i wanted to ask owen as a former intern and you know like the quiet kid who's like hitting out on the show a little bit how do you kind of stand out i want to get this perspective from yes great question great question owen how do you stand out i don't think you're supposed to yeah people are too concerned with fitting out and you need to learn how to fit in stand out by blending in i think i fit in too well because in the past two months um i have talked to my boss once and just sitting in front of computer getting paid to watch the Yak. I don't think that, I think that

some people kind of have this idea that they need to be talking to their boss a bunch. I bet your boss doesn't want to talk to you. No offense. Alright. I respect that. Yeah, any real job I've had, I only talk to like one or two people there. I feel like bosses just aren't, you know, they don't want to talk to everybody. Maybe they do, but I feel like

maybe only out of obligation. I'll just say yes to everything. Has Dave talked to you today? What did Dave say to you today? He said he came over. He did say hello, and I said hello, Dave. Then he saw my shirt, which is Team Portnoy, and I said, what are the odds your first day back in the office?

I happen to be wearing this. He laughed. Did he laugh? Yeah, he chuckled. It was an uproarious laugh. So you thought about this outfit today and you still went with the Velcro Cortezes? No, it was happenstance. I need a new pair of shoes.

I think I need a new pair of shoes. I've had these for about a year and I've gotten nothing but insults on them. The Allbirds are worse. Allbirds are a sponsor of some things and I like them. Yeah, we're not going to be, this show will never make fun of a sponsor

for the bad things that they do to somebody. Well, that might have something to do with tomorrow's show. Jake, thank you so much for the call, brother. And I really thought that we were about to get out of here, but there's another call that's about to make it through. And I feel like such an obligation to the callers to make up for this. It's like I had a dinner party and I burned the roast or something like that. And I went to overindulge people.

You weren't that bad today. No, it's more like just the state of the show. As soon as walking in when it's just me and you, it's like, oh, we need to do something extra. We need to overdeliver. We need to go over the top. I think we overdel think we over deliver well we set the bar so low it would have been hard to not meet yes and that was the one benefit i guarantee you that this show will get better throughout the week that's my promise to everybody i'll get better every day that i'm on tommy you're not gonna be on for the rest of the week unfortunately this was kind of

just tuesday one trial run and uh we're gonna have chicken fry on instead of you my boy okay um thank you so much for for doing this thank you for having me i hope i was able to be a very good sport you've been a very good sport hey this this skin thicker than than uh than thick water before Before you go, just pull your weenus for the people. Yeah. No, wait, wait. That's loose. Just pull it until the until the music comes on. Look how thick it is.

I can't even I can't pull it. I literally can't. No, I can't. Oh, God. I'm trying to pull it so hard. I can't pull it. It's so thick.

It's so thick. Yeah. So I can't. I have no weenus. From everyone in the Yak family, I'm so sorry. I apologize.

That was a great show. you Thank you.