The Yak - Always Has - The Yak's Best Moments: Part 1

Episode Date: November 26, 2020

Some of our favorite bits such as: the full Gar saga, 10% of the Bucs roster calling in when Steven Cheah was out, Nick's straight dad's work, Steven Cheah's tread water challenge, The Yak negotiates a car for Brandon Walker, Lunch Lotteries and Tommy Walker!!!You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak

Hey Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. I'm here with Stephen Che, mostly, but also KB, and also Nick. What's goodie, Roan? Just reminiscing on some of my favorite holiday traditions. You were just about to sing your favorite Thanksgiving song. Yeah. Yep.

You hear those turkeys roasting and they're getting stuffed with stuffing. Yeah. Who doesn't love that one? The best. The car commercials. Is this coming out on Thanksgiving? Yes. I would love to just have families gather and listen to us boys.

Yeah, I think they will. Did you say listen to ass boys? Ass boys. It read as an ass. And you know what? Since people are going to be listening with their family, let's keep it family friendly so we won't say cunt. Yeah, no cunts.

What else? No talking about sucking pussy. No talking about sucking pussy. In any manner. Very specifically, no sucking pussy. No sucking pussy. No talking about sucking pussy. No cunnilingus in any manner. Anything, but just very specifically no sucking pussy. No sucking pussy. Yeah, not even the mere simulation of sucking pussy will have docked 15 points from your house. No cunnilingus, no gore.

No politics. No politics. But also no blood, guts, and gore. Oh, no cunnilingus, no gore. No politics. No politics. But also no blood, guts, and gore. Oh, no. Yeah. No politics. No bush, no gore, but also no politics. Yes. And what else should we rule out?

How about no high-fat foods or very large sodas? No sodas over 32 ounces for this episode only okay just in the best interest of of making uh nothing that could make people with their elder relatives feel uncomfortable or vice versa or that could cause death or that could lead to an early death yeah no even smoking cigarettes on this no but um there's like cannabinoids have anti-carcinogens in them so you can yeah you can rip up uh kb's been using speed stick deodorant ruthlessly you fucking paint that shit on you put it under under your under your nipples on the backs of your knees fucking i treat it like a lotion yeah a salve even yeah you've you've been big on salves i bet right i go i go in and out of

salve kicks right now yes sometimes you're salve and sometimes you're all balmed up yeah yeah i was it oh you've never seen a balm you wouldn't spread i'm a balm guy especially around the holidays because i just have a family that is uh addicted to giving balms. Oh, yeah. They'll just bless me with so many balms. I have one cousin who always offers balms. He just says, just don't put your lips on it. What do you mean? That's what balms are for. I know.

Like he's offering a drink. He's doing a kind gesture. Yeah, just waterfall it. Waterfall the balm, yeah. I mean, I don't want to put anyone on the spot, but Nick, you just, you bombed me on Friday And asked me to not take it off You asked me not to lip it up

And you asked me not even to put my finger On the top of it You made me chip off the side of it Like I was taking a chunk out of a redwood Well you have that really long pinky nail And so I was just like just use that What else do you have that for But that ruins the I don't want that to get too wet ever.

I can't ever have that get too wet. It just doesn't hold. It doesn't hold. Yeah. It doesn't hold when you have too much moisture on there. It kind of congeals everything. Like putting too much batter in. Like an ambrosia salad.

Like putting too much butter in a batter. Yeah, exactly like that. You know what I found awkward this week was when you guys were on CEO Erica's podcast. Yeah. I found that. Yeah, that was pretty awkward. I discovered that as awkward. Yeah.

I was the original founder of that being awkward. Yeah, you were like Henry Hudson of finding that being awkward. Even though that river definitely existed before Henry Hudson came around. But she made you tell a story about a story that she heard in Vegas, and you had to set her straight, and you'd be like, it happened how I'm telling it right now. I tell someone a different lie every time. Yeah. I don't like how people actually listen to us on that.

What do you mean? I don't know. How people actually listen to you on that podcast because she was asking for candid answers. I like the candid answers, but at the same time, I didn't like how people were actually listening to you. You guys are home court players. Yeah. Yeah.

Take a road game and then suddenly you're calling your boss a cunt. Yeah. I thought we said no cunt talk, though. I didn't say the word. I just thought thought we said no cunt talk though i i didn't i didn't say the word i just thought that we said no cunt talk okay none it's done all right that's on me then for uh for bringing up anything about a cunt but uh it is a holiday episode and we do have some shit to talk about some of the best things that we've ever talked about on the hack yeah things that nick uh wasn't even here for.

Yes. I'm going to be alone on this. We know you guys are talking about this, much like Quicken. Not one of our sponsors. Sorry, Stephen. Stephen takes it so seriously that he's so dismayed every single time that you cross a pitch, you cross an ad. Did you listen to the Yak beforehand? Did you listen to the Yak before?

No, I didn't have Sirius. You never even rented a car with Sirius? No, I was never old enough to rent a car before this. Yeah, it is. What do you have to be, 31? 25. Oh, is it 25? 35?

Oh, I thought it was 27. No, I just never rented a car before this then. Really? Yeah. Have you ever rented a car? Yeah, I have now. Pretty fucking sweet. It was pretty wicked. 27 no i just never rented a car before this then really yeah have you ever rented a car yeah i have now pretty fucking sweet it was pretty it was pretty wicked you know what i would say it's a rental don't be gentle i was whipping that rav4 yeah just fucking scrape up the sides of it

fucking drive down wrong way down a one way pop the tires treating like a rocket driving quick and alone yeah yeah oh no no maybe like i'm terribly alone this holiday season i'm terribly alone like uh like like quicken terribly horribly alone horribly yeah the worst oh the worst all right let's talk about uh steven's such a disappointed somebody called out um when i was walking down the hall today that I had my ears pierced before. You could see the, I guess you can see the holes today. Yeah. And they were actually gauged. Really?

Yes. And you were never gauged. I was more gauged than Matt. Oh, my God. But the— Steve, are you going to have to cut all this? No, no, no, no. You can't. You simply cannot cut this.

This is our best shit. You know how long we fucking worked on those setups? The pick and roll? The what and roll? The quick and roll uh but uh yeah the fact that you did have gauges and how how much elasticity you have to your ear your ear lobes like how they've shrunk down to such a tiny hole that you would think it was just a pinprick really speaks well to how tight your pussy would be if you were a girl i would have yeah i could probably single pussedly take the

biggest dicks and go back down to size so the yeah like a like the like the pussy of like the pussy of what like the pussy of a child yeah um i was gonna use a pizza dough analogy when pizza dough is too cold and so yeasty and it kind of shrinks back down. Like a miner pussy. No, no, no. Like somebody getting cold. Insignificant one.

Not a major one. Just somebody down there digging coal underground. A miner. Miner pussy. And there's not enough pussies represented in the coal mining industry yeah we are male heavy over emasculated yeah pro minor pussy we need more pussies in the mine we need more minor pussies let's get that trending yeah this is bad we had a we had a guy named gar on one time onto the yak.

And man, did we mess with this motherfucking guy. We threw him. The way he messed with us. He had me thinking, what's real? What's fake? Yeah. Gar was stoned out of his gourd, I'm pretty sure. It was the most authentic call we've ever gotten. Unless he was fucking with us.

No, he wasn't. He was high to the point of just pure paranoia. And he called into us. I don't know if it was on purpose, but he reached our line and just wanted help. Yeah. And we helped him in some ways. And in some ways, we helped ourselves to just a delicious saga of some classic radio shit so grab a turkey leg curl up by the fire get a fistful of warm chocolate shove that shit in your mouth and a fistful of chocolate a fistful of hershey's kisses that you've softened by the fire and you left in your pocket for too

long now they're staining the inside of your pocket with a deep Hershey stain that you'll never be able to get out. You've ruined some khakis. And just enjoy this segment. This call could be interesting. Gar, go ahead, Gar. Big Cat, what's up?

My thoughts are, my apartment apartment this maintenance guy just showed up and he saw like an ace of weed on my table are they narcs are maintenance narcs or yes so oh are you high right now gar yes i'm high but i'm in my car gravity gravity bombs are where it's at that's the economical move i'm just trying to i'm just a northeast thing where is. Where is the maintenance guy right now? Is he hearing you talk about how you're high and if he's in work? No, no. He knocked on the door.

He came in, saw the bag of weed on my counter, and now he's doing his maintenance shit, and I just, like, walked out immediately. But I'm just like, I don't know what the rules and regulations are. I don't know. I mean, I guess it's – I don't know. I live in Pennsylvania, Pittsburgh. Dude, I would call the cops, dude. I feel like know. I mean, I guess it's, I don't know. I live in Pennsylvania, Pittsburgh. Dude, I would call the cops,

dude. I feel like that's the only thing you could do right now is just call the cops and just come clean right now. Just start off like reverse psychology. I'm worried. I'm worried. He's like apartment people because I live on, it's not on campus school,

but like, I feel like I go to pit. I feel like those people at school. I don't know, dude. I have neighbors that are on the football team. When they get high, like, and then when... Don't knock on that.

Don't knock on that. Wait, wait. So you live not on campus, but the maintenance guy might know, like, the dean of students. Yeah, yeah. And tell them that Gar... The football players I spoke with,

when they get... And you're calling us, asking about, you're making sure someone else isn't a nari wait wait so gar do you think that this maintenance guy probably is like hey i went to do some i went to unclog the toilet at gar's apartment he's been smoking a lot of weed that's that's what i think i'm just i just heard sketchy shit dude yeah i think you're fucked call the carriage call the cops i would be all about weed. I don't know.

I feel like they have to. I don't know, man. Did this guy, what was this guy wearing? He was like a 40-year-old bald. What? Like, he looked, I don't know. He looked really mad. I don't know.

He looked mad. Okay. West of Pennsylvania, there's some rough, I don't know. There's some rough people out here. Well, he might be mad because you didn't offer him some weed, you fucking asshole. Here's your only chance to get out of this. Last time for the AC, he wanted it. I hit Jesus in. Like, he was great. He was awesome. The AC guy was really

Go back to your apartment, sprint in, grab the weed, and just sprint out. Yes. If he's still working. I don't have some I just had Raid. I sprayed a bunch of Raid because Raid actually smells pretty good, but like, I don't It was like kind of near the area where you were at. Dude, you were spraying Raid? You huffing Raid?

Wait, is Raid on the blunt? I've worked before with my parents. Raid actually smells really good. Like if you're in a bathroom. No, it doesn't. It's literally poison. It did, it works, bro. All right, well, Gar, keep listening.

Keep listening, Gar. We'll discuss this, but we also have a maintenance guy who called in. Maybe it's your maintenance guy. We're going to take his call. This guy's spraying Raid all call. Thanks for the call, Gar. He's freaking out right now, just running around Pittsburgh. Mike, who else

are you going to call? We are the guys who will answer this question. Mike, you're a maintenance man. What's up? Hey, what's up, boys? Go ahead. Explain it. Gar's fucked. I just spit out my coffee. Oh, fuck.

He's fucked? He's fucked, Mike? Well, how so? Are you a narc? Oh, yeah. Good time. No, dude, no. Gar's freaking out right now.

Mike, so you narc on guys when you show up to their house? Either narc on them or I just take their weed. Yeah. Okay. That's a fair trade. Thanks for the call, Mike. I mean, Gar is losing it right now. He's running around Pittsburgh.

Yeah, he should run back in, steal it and just sprint back out. What a perfect back-to-back call. Mike, the maintenance guy, great like awareness of the moment. So just be like, yeah, Gar's fucked. Expert comedic delivery, timing, everything. Oh, I'm narc. We're not giving enough attention to Gar saying to cover the weed scent he sprays fucking weed. What are you talking about?

Smells good. He covered up the statement about the football players with that statement. That was an action-packed call. That whole call. Gar, you're fucked, dude. Dude, I'm sorry I missed out.

Bro, I'm still in my car. don't know i'm really high like before i get off before i go on the elevator like i just want to kind of calm down for a sec all right wait wait stay on the phone and walk in walk into your house while you're on the phone all right let me go up the elevator um dude i'm there i don't want to act like you're talking to the cops on the phone when you walk in and say sorry officer i officer, I'm throwing it out right now. So the maintenance guy hears you. Some burglar broke in and left a bunch of weed on my table. I also reek of weed.

I got to get one sucker. Spray yourself down with some red. Guard, give the phone to the maintenance guy and we'll talk to him. All right. All right. All right. So go in. Stop playing those sirens.

Gar's going to lose his mind. All right, so you walking in right now, Gar? I'm walking up the stairs, bro. Okay. Walking up the stairs. You got this, Gar. You got this, Gar. You're cool, dude. Just like, you're totally normal.

I'm cool. I'm cool. I'm cool. Just breathe. Breathe. Breathe. I'm on the ninth floor. I'm walking.

You're in the ninth floor I'm walking just take the elevator Jesus Christ Gar elevators like if you reek of weed I don't know you're gonna take us up nine you're gonna be sweating Gar but you made me get the toxins out

I skipped my class today I need to do stuff. Well, no shit, y'all. Thanks. It's just a gravity bomb. You can go to class high. Right. What floor are you on, dude?

What's your progress like? Oh my god, yeah. They're not here, but this place rakes. Oh my god. They're gone? He's gone? Is your bud there? Bro, I got, like, a guarantor and shit on this place. Like, I feel like they're going to call.

I don't know, bro. All right, dude, listen. Here's what you got to do. What are the name of the football players you smoke with? No, don't say that. Don't say that. All right, Gar, this is what you got to do, Gar. Gar, just chill out, Gar.

Hit the gravity ball again and chill out. You're fine. All right, yeah, I may play some Call of Duty beta. There you go. There you go. There you go. Dave's turning around already. I'm telling you, when they ambush you and they knock on the door and then you're like,

all right, it's about to bleed. I don't know. Knock on the door is not an ambush. Yeah, I don't know about that. Gar, listen. Just put up your button now in case that happens so you don't have to rush. Call in tomorrow, Gar, and give us an update.

But go play, get on the sticks and play a little don't do that. Go play some Call of Duty. You got this, dude. We'll talk to you tomorrow. Being there is the worst feeling in the world, especially if you walk in and they're in your room. Well, the best part is Gar is a true stoner because he's like, the maintenance guy ambushed me.

He probably had this on the books for like a month. He's like, yeah, maintenance guy's coming to fix this thing. What the fuck is that? You can't get high, though, when you have a maintenance guy in your house just because it will freak you out. That is true. Like another human being that you don't know in your home

while you're high sucks. But he was high and then he went outside and hit the gravity bong again. He was so high that he had to deal with how high he was by getting high. The gravity bong too, it's not an easy high, like it's not an easy transition, it's just straight to the top. Skydiving. Yeah.

You're dumbest when you hit a gravity bong. Gar's either going to get lost in his thoughts and just be freaking out for the rest of the day, or he's going to get on Call of Duty and just forget this all happened. Sicko mode. Yeah, just fucking smoke fools. Just fuck up some 13-year-olds playing hooky. He's going to fuck them up.

He's not going to remember to call us tomorrow. Slurs, yeah, on the live stream. We had to call Gar. We should have got his number so we could remind him of what happened. No, he'd freak out. He'd be like, what? How do you guys have my number? The maintenance guy.

Oh, we should call him and be like, hey, do we have his number? Fuck. That would actually be hilarious. We'd call him and say, hey, hello, Gar. If anyone knows Gar, dude, give us his number. Call us up with his number. Fuck. We don't get numbers when they call in?

Damn. That would have been so fucked up, but I would have done it in a heartbeat. Just call him up. Unethical. It's breaking HIPAA, but fuck it. I'm from the University of Pittsburgh Maintenance Department. Yeah, that whole call. I'm the dean of the maintenance department.

We can find him. There's only got to be one Gar total. Who smoked weed with the football team. Yeah, what a knock. Let's just go to the football team total. Who smoked weed with the football team. Yeah, what a knife. Let's just go to the football team. He was going to answer you. I know he was. That's why I had to cut you off.

I was like, shut up, shut up, shut up. Don't do it, don't do it, don't do it. I can only give you numbers. The next day on the Yak. Are we live? Don't have. Oh, yeah. We're very live.

Yeah, couldn't be more alive. The visuals are incredible. Thank you, baby. Hey. Hey. Hey. Nope. Gareth? May I ask who's calling?

This is Alan Hevwitz from Dean Bonner's office. Hello? Yeah. Gareth, we have a report that there was some type of drug use at your residence during this past week, and we're going to need you to come into the provost's office to talk about this. Hello? I mean, drug use? Where did that come from? I don't... We have had multiple reports of drug use, drug paraphernalia, and other illicit substances going on at your residence. And we're going to need you to come down to the provost's office to talk about it.

And I'm going to need to take a statement from you right now over the phone. Now it's best if you come clean about this. Tell us what you're doing. Yeah, I'm not going to say shit until I have my attorney with me. Sorry. Gar, what's up, dude? Yo, Gar, what's up? It's the guys from the app.

Yo, what the fuck, dude? Oh, my God. What the fuck? Bro, you're going to bring your lawyer in? You brought the lawyer, Kyle? You just brought the. What the fuck? Bro, you're going to bring your lawyer in? You bought the lawyer card? You just bought the lawyer on Rome? You said Dean Bonner. What the hell?

What the fuck? How high are you right now? What the fuck? How many grabs did you rip this afternoon? None, dude. I had five to one. I should know. I haven't done it in like three weeks.

Sorry. Fuck. All right. Well, guard. I should know. I haven't been in like three weeks. Sorry. Fuck. All right. Well, Gar, just. I'm like shaking. Oh, my God. I'm just happy it's you, but fuck. Oh, my God.

Hey, man, you're a legend. You know what's my worst fear, dude? I was worried about my parents or like someone at Pitt doing that thing last night. I don't know. I was worried. Dude, don't worry about it. It's fucking good. It could be any Gar. Dude, don't worry about it. It's not going to happen.

Could be any Gar. And then you found my name, Gar. God, that was, I was like, oh. No one's named Gar, dude. Just a fashion. No one's named Gar. No, that's actually my name. I could get into the etymology of it, but my name's Gar. Okay. Well, either way, dude, we were thinking of you today, and we want you to know that we got your back. If you need

us to write a letter of recommendation or anything, we got you, all right? All right, awesome. No one cares about you smoking weed, man. Yeah, no one cares about you smoking weed. Don't you worry about it. All right, dude, have a good class. I'm going to call it again. I'm ripped.

I'm going to call it again. Okay, yeah, do that. Please do that. Please do that. All right, God bless. God bless. I'm not saying shit. He dropped a lawyer on you. Oh, my God. I can't believe that he dropped a lawyer bomb so we

couldn't tell the backstory because we were afraid that he was maybe listening to the show but that guy gar yesterday called in with one of the funniest calls in yak history he had been uh pretty high and then the maintenance guy came to his house and he was just freaking out the maintenance guy knew he was high and he was just hiding in his car, calling in the show, being like, what do I do? What do I do? So then someone sent us his phone number and yeah, that was pretty fucking funny.

How are you going to bring a lawyer to the dean's office? Shout out Gar to like think fast though there and be like, yo, need a lawyer. His whole plan was just be quiet. If Rowan didn't keep pressing him with the hellos, I don't know what he was going to do man he's gonna be entirely silent i needed that statement damn it what a legend that guy i fucking love him i'm not saying shit like no i'm not high right

now i got class first time i'm not saying shit without my lawyer you said that to the provost i'm not saying shit yeah gar yeah, Gar. Very innocent statement. Team Gar. Can't wait for him to call back. We'll be quick. No, no, no. But you can go beyond that, and then I'll just need you to export it. But imagine us without you here.

It could get pretty fucky. Could. Absolutely could. It's almost like you're leaving us the keys to the to the car and you're saying uh you could drive this and i won't know if you do it's true yeah i mean i have other responsibilities steven's about to duck out and i feel like he wants us to do some something bad i think he does yeah he does this is a test well i mean whatever you do i i need you

to upload so i can cut this up i don't know how to upload and kb definitely doesn't i know i'll get someone who knows how to stefan i think like at least 75 percent of the office inside upload something we're none of those people no one trick ponies that fine. We three. Do you know how to upload? And you don't even work that much, honestly. No, I don't. No. I've been hearing that. It's been going around.

That is the rumor around town. All right, are we back? Are we back or have we been back? We've been back. I don't know. So that was Gar. I've heard so much about him. Yes, and that was us prank calling him,

and that was the landlord. him and that was uh the landlord uh i don't know dude i don't know if we're gonna get the maintenance call i think it's supposed to be in there that just disappeared i don't know so we might be talking about something that's disappeared i think i have it okay so hopefully you just heard that yeah yeah here's some other shit we were talking about off air not not this group but me and Okay. So hopefully you just heard that. Yeah, yeah. Here's some other shit we were talking about off air. Not this group, but me and some other people. Don't you think it's kind of bullshit that Al Capone and Ben Franklin have both been reduced to their syphilis?

I never associated Ben Franklin with syphilis. Oh, really? He's like the bell, the lightning, the kite. The syphilis. The sign, the thing he signed. Yeah. The Bill of Rights. First post, America's first post office. Yeah. He didn't use towels.

He air dried. He used to walk around in circles in his backyard. Naked? Yeah, yeah. Naked. He was just air dry and he would just walk in circles until he was dry. And he lived in Philadelphia. Think about the winter times for Ben Franklin. Oh, he would do that in the winter? He would do it all year round.

It was his shit. If it's his shit, I can't knock it. No. I mean, you haven't tried it. And now we can't even try that anymore. That, like syphilis being deadly, is gone from us now. Sad. But I just think it's bullshit that Al Capone was a great man

and the first thing that anyone thinks of is their little fun fact. What do you think of? Maybe minor syphilis. Like he didn't, it wasn't deadly. No, he died from it. Oh, he did? They said that his brain deteriorated to the

brain of a 12 year old by the time that he perished. He was fishing in the pool. Fishing in the pool? Yeah, he was like... Like any 12-year-old does. That's the worst body of water to fish in. You think? It's up there.

Down there. It's down there. Think of a worse one. Tub. Bucket. Pond. All right all right now yeah no i guess a pond yeah i don't even think any a pool wasn't a body of water you don't think so i would i would i would consider it is a reservoir yeah then the pool is i asked hunter henry one time that uh chargers tight end i asked him what his most most favorite non-traditional body of water was.

What'd he say? He didn't understand the question. Yeah. Well, he has age. He's gotten a lot of concussions, hasn't he? Has he really? Yeah. He was affable.

Do concussions affect your affability? He's got Ben Franklin brain. Yeah. I think he had relative ancestors who passed away in a fjord um we have more clips to to bring these motherfuckers so uh i hope you're not too sleepy by the fire because we have a complete show. You're confusing Thanksgiving with something. Y'all never cuddle up by the fire on... Handfuls of

chocolate. By the fire. It's turkey leg. Okay. Some hot chocolate. You've never heard of hot chocolate? A handful of hot, yeah. Okay. You've never heard of hot chocolate? So hot chocolate is just not a thing to you? No. Yeah.

Huh? No. Go on Huh? No. Go on. You prefer cold chocolate? This one involves Stephen Che. Ooh. And another crank call. We were crank calling.

And Steve, why don't you explain this one a little bit to us before you skedaddle out of here. So this was when I left radio and I had off and I was going to Bucks training camp as an invited member from the GM. And I was listening and I was missing one day. And yeah, you guys had a bunch of Bucks players call in coincidentally on the day that I was not there. I believe it was five players. That was a strange coincidence that all those Tampa Bay Buccaneers called into our humble little radio program that we almost never have guests on it. That made me realize how popular we are. Yeah, you never know.

You never asked for a raise unsuccessfully. You really did? I did. After that, I was like, holy shit. Five NFL players called in. Yeah. Just randomly. And you didn't get the raise?

No. Why? I don't get the raise? No. Why? I don't know. That's bullshit. Maybe they need, you should just, I feel like whenever Brandon asks for a raise,

they just give him another show. They're like, all right, to justify this, you need another show. Same as a raise in his mind. A raise in hours of work. That's the narcissist's raise. Just more screen time. We'll let you do some high noon ads

you'll be seen more you'll be seen way more he gets paid in impressions i've never seen get paid in the own impressions they work that's like a prison worker getting paid in license plates he just has to make the license plate and he also gets to keep it And he also gets to keep it. And he also gets to take it home. Nick, if you had someone dream, a dream person call into the Yak and prank call you, who would it be? Gotta be my gramps. Yeah. I don't know. Back from the dead?

Yeah. Get a Ouija board in there. Have him write in. Yeah. The one that died from cancer. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. yeah yeah he did they both did but um yeah yeah that's ironic yeah in some ways yeah thanks for bringing that up okay uh so here's a clip um all right so 83385 stool is the call-in number. I was a state champion, so it kind of like it's not like I'm a fraud.

Yeah. Let's go to the calls. Let's see who we got here. Should I elaborate on that? Yeah, go ahead. Yeah. Do you have any questions? No.

Okay. Peyton in Tampa Bay. Peyton, what's up, man? Hey, what's going on, guys? How you guys doing? What's going on guys how you guys doing what's going on is this uh it says right here on the call line it's peyton barber you're is this peyton barber from the bucks yes sir what's up man oh fuck bro what's up dude what's going on how's camp going oh dude it's going pretty good going pretty good can't i can't can't complain so dude i gotta be

honest with you our producer uh is a huge bucks fan but he's not here today it's it's fucking crazy you'd call in yeah he would love this he would love it we don't have any bucks specific questions for you but it would that's i mean it's awesome that you're calling in i mean so everything's going well you guys feeling good about the season yeah man i i feel like man this season is going to be a pretty a pretty cool season man um you know the coaching staff that we have man it's looking it's looking good so i can't go that's dope that's dope um i i guess since we don't have any go ahead brandon walker i kind of i kind of fucked up yeah you told me that this could happen yeah i prepared some questions but they're milwaukee bucks questions oh okay that's my bad okay so so peyton what uh i guess because we don't have any bucks questions and our producer's not

here um do you do you have any thoughts on the new auburn logo i saw a big big to do on twitter about that oh man i i don't know anything about that i haven't heard anything about that man my focus has been strictly on the book fuck okay all right well hey payton thanks for the call man we really appreciate it that's awesome that you listen to the show i wish we had i wish i prepared questions damn damn well yeah she has something for him all right all right well hey man call for him. All right. Hey, man, call in any time, all right? Yeah, no doubt, man. You got to take it easy now. All right. Thanks.

Thanks, Peyton. Fuck, man. That was Peyton Barber from the campaign box. That's crazy. That's completely random. Oh, my gosh. Unbelievable. You know who's going to be mad? I mean, who? Dude, Steve. He's got to be. He's got to be mad. I never thought about it. That was crazy.

I just put the pieces together yeah he would be so pissed oh man barbara what dude how often does a running back just call into a radio i knew he was a fan he just texted me he just texted me what the steven changes texted me what the fuck peyton barber just called in is this stage no it was not stage we do the show like we always do the show. Yeah, we're doing two hours today, but we can't control who calls in. That's crazy. What a coincidence.

That's a crazy coincidence. Yeah, yeah. We actually have someone else. It's Cameron Brait from the Tampa Bay Bucks. Wow. What? No way. Wow.

What's up, Cam? This is getting out of control. What's up, guys? Long time listener. First time caller. How's it going? It's going well man i it's crazy that you're calling in we i mean i i don't know if you guys are all listening to it in in

the locker room but steven che our longtime producer and diehard bucks fan is not here today so all these bucks players calling in like we don't even know what to ask them wow that's too bad that's a shame yeah they see that yeah well so since we don't have any bucks questions here's a question for you uh caleb just said he almost went to brown to play college football you went to harvard tell me how bad brown is at football they're pretty bad huh you know i actually was deciding between brown and harvard Those are my final two. I was almost a Brown bear, but I'm happy I made the decision to go to Harvard.

I think we went 4-0 against Brown. Makes sense. They're not the best. But pass-fail, though. Yeah, pass-fail. They don't do great. Yeah, the pass-fail, you get to make your own major. There's definitely some positives, but

it's not for everyone. How's the offense looking? You know, offense is looking great, guys. A little insight. We're hoping Jameis takes the next step this year. He's looked really good

so far. I got a question. Colvin Jameis, you know, takes the next step this year. He's looked really good so far. Yep. Okay. I got a question. Yeah. Joe, did you know, this is my only thing I know about Tampa. Did you know that there's a John Gruden's headquarters for whenever he was doing the, what was his show called?

Gruden's QB camp? Yes. Was inside the headquarters for Hooters in Tampa? That's a good tip. Was it really? Yes. He's got a, he's got a little office next to a golf course,

like in a little strip mall. And that's just where he goes and like breaks down. So I'm pretty sure he still, he still rents it out. Yeah. That's hilarious. Anything else that we can know about the bucks? I mean,

we don't, again, you're going to have to call back in when we're is here. We're not huge Bucs guys. He's not here. He really is. So, um... You know, team on the rise, guys. Okay. Well, you know what? We'll take your word for it. Yeah, yeah. Cam,

thanks so much, man. Appreciate the call, and call in any time. It seems like everyone on the Bucs is a fan. That's right. All right. Appreciate it, guys. All right. Thanks, man. This is crazy. Are we playing this the wrong way? You keep saying we don't have questions for these guys, but they're randomly calling.

Maybe these guys have questions. Oh, yeah. We're not giving them their spotlight. That's true. Why would we ask a question to someone who called in? I don't know. Steven, you're on now. Steven Chase is a super Bucs fan calling in.

This is unreal. I don't think there's ever been a more confused person on the planet than when Peyton Barber called in the first two minutes. I was in the bathroom and had the radio going, and then I heard you say, is this Peyton Barber on the box? And I said, what the fuck? I immediately doubled back to the computer to listen. After, honestly, the first two, after Bo Allen called, I actually thought it was a very odd coincidence.

But after the third, fourth it and now the fifth caller i have to believe five that you've been up to something and you know what had tip applaud uh this was unbelievable uh i can't believe you got this why don't we have this many callers on a regular day steven you the day that you're out, 10% of the Bucs roster called in. 10%. That's the worst statistic I've ever heard. But it's true. What should we have been asking them?

Did we have a loss? Yeah, we blew it. I couldn't think of the worst part. Even Tam Brayton is an AWL and he wore a Chaw Dog shirt to training camp last year. No questions about that. Caleb asked Bo Allen about his hair. That was a good question. I asked about his hair.

I thought it was good. I appreciate you asking. He said 100 strokes every morning. It sucks, man. I feel bad, Steven. We had the pressure of the two-hour show. We didn't really know what to talk about. Then all of a sudden, five Bucs

players randomly call in the day. This guy can't get mad at us for what we've asked. He should have been here. It fell apart. You could have prepped us. We weren't prepped. Had any of you communicated back with me that this was happening, I could have provided

multiple pages of a prep sheet. How would we have known? We had no idea. We randomly called in. Dude, after the third player called in, we were like, we should think I could have provided multiple pages of a prep. How would we have known? We had no idea this. We randomly called in. Dude, after the third player called in, we were like, we should think about prepping. And then we're like, dude, it's just impossible that anyone else would. We're in the middle of a show. In our defense, Caleb, Caleb's right.

After the third person, we're like, we should prep. But then it got to the hour two and we're like, we're going to bomb this. He should have called in earlier and fixed this. He should have called in and gave us questions like 45 minutes ago. You have our number, dude. Hindsight is 2020, man. There's never been a rougher radio listen than me listening to this show today. And I guess for that, I applaud you guys.

All right. Where are you right now? Are you getting ready? Are you going to text Jason Light when you're three minutes away from the facility? A lot of people have been replying to me on Twitter with that, which I think is very funny. He texted me at seven 30 this morning. I was asleep.

So I'm glad we are. We are all in alignment. Plans are a go today. I'm very excited. I'm going to be there in a little under two hours, about an hour and a half. I might stop by in about 45 minutes talk to some fans steven chay fans you're talking about yes yes that exact time um so i'm very excited i also have a break in the schedule or i might in a in a in some breaking news i might be also attending training camp tomorrow. Whoa!

Tomorrow morning, which should be exciting, but it's going to be an unforgettable day in my life, and I appreciate you guys being an unforgettable part of it with this ruse, but thank you very much. I'll be sure to update you guys in the coming days. Hey, appreciate that, Steven. Can you maybe

write up those notes? Maybe skip camp tomorrow and write up those notes for the five players that called in, just in case Hey, appreciate that. Steven, can you maybe write up those notes, maybe skip camp tomorrow and write up those notes for the five players that called in just in case they call in again. They all said they would. They said they would. That's true. Maybe don't go to camp. Actually.

No. Cause camp tomorrow is 10 AM to 1230. So I don't think they'll be calling in tomorrow. Oh boy. Oh boy. Did you just fucking tempt us oh boy don't fucking kick the bee's nest oh shit all right well i'll have to get something for you man it's a bare bone kilb and i will snap our fingers again and there there will be calls. Alright, Steven, have fun, dude. Alright, thanks, guys. Enjoy the rest of the show.

Now he knows he has to do that. He knows that if he doesn't make that list, that's gonna happen. He's made a terrorist demand. We're like, dude, don't make me and Caleb do this a fucking game, dude. We will get in touch with a bunch of other players. Alright, boys.

Let's really fire it up. Steven's out. Steven's out. Yeah. Okay, so this was the Atroian episode. And I don't mean a fucking cum carrier. I mean that we snuck a fucking episode inside of an episode. Steven's away so the children will play.

I'm taking off my headphones for this one. Yeah? Yeah, that's how loose I want to get with it. We kept the Shroud of Innocence going under the guise of... Under the Shroud of Innocence, under the guise of... Respectability. The guise of respectability. I was torn between Shroud and guise.

We were feigning respectability, and now that respectability is completely out the window you know who's always under the guys my old man my pops and uh i brought that up on radio and uh yeah he wasn't too happy about it but uh you know what fuck it let's listen yes fuck it fresh off a weekend with mr dad dude how was your straight dad this weekend it was it's really good to uh hang out with my dad considering he's so busy with his job and uh do you mind if i ask what your straight dad does he does have a cool job yeah it's cool um it's it's really like it's a masculine gig you know um airplanes airlines yeah he uh it's he's a masculine gig. You know airplanes, airlines? Yeah.

He – He's a – he must – is he a – he's an engine constructor? No, he – No, no, no. Let me guess. He's a – He is – Pilot? No, it's actually –

Well, let me guess. I'm trying to think of something more masculine. He works on – he works with airplanes. Is he an engineer that designs the airplane? My dad serves beer on airplanes. He has this cart that he pushes down the aisle. He'll serve beer and snacks. Your dad's a stewardess?

A stewardess. No, my dad's a bartender on a little mobile bar on a plane. It's the two coolest things. It's beer and flying. Wait, so you're saying that your straight dad is a stewardess? Serves beer. No, I see what you're saying that your straight dad serves beer. No, I see what you're saying. He's a beer server. He's a beer server.

Yeah, in the air. Yeah, and it's cool, but I rarely get to see him. So how did it go this weekend? Did he work on the way up here? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, he flew. He flew.

Yeah, just to get some out. He's always working overtime, always staying late. Yeah. But it's good. It's good to see him. What would you guys do this weekend? You know, he and I, we talked about like, you know, romantic prospects for me. He gave me tips for picking up women.

Your dad only hangs out with women. Yeah. That's the crazy thing. He refuses to hang out with men. He just like has this group of girlfriends that he hangs out with. Yeah. He'll just like, you know, begrudgingly go shopping with women. Yeah, that's the crazy thing. He refuses to hang out with men. He just has this group of girlfriends that he hangs out with. And he'll just begrudgingly go shopping with them. But it's like... But they're chicks.

Hanging out with chicks. Yeah, he likes hanging out with chicks. That's a straight dad move. What does your mom think about that? My mom's pretty cool about it. She understands. My dad's just straight as fuck. Dude, are you sure that you're... Are as fuck. Dude, are you sure?

Are you sure? I mean, I don't want to say. What are you even thinking right now? I'm not trying to infer anything. I'm just saying, are you positive that your dad is, you know, everything he says he is to you, that he's always, is he truthful? Like, you know,

they say KB's dad live sometimes. Not only is my dad straight as fuck, he's a straight shooter. And I trust everything he says. He, he, he and I have similar mannerisms. We carry ourselves the same way.

Just like two confident men. Yeah. You guys two confident men. Yeah. You guys had to go. I mean, as long as you guys had a fun time together and you guys are, you know, he's teaching you stuff like a dad should and you're trying to follow in his footsteps, then it sounds like you're a chip off the old block.

I mean. Yeah. It is what it is. Yeah, that's us. No matter what he is, you know, no matter if he serves beer or even if he's serving wine sometimes, you know. know yeah and he'll give out like just basic snacks and like he'll also tell people how to like use the use the seat belt on the plane before it takes off

it's really cool yeah really is that something you wanted to do when you grew up to be like him has he always done that he has always done that yeah yeah for for a long long time yeah that's how he met my mom oh really was she flying or was she a pilot or no she was just on on the plane wow yeah and he said he couldn't take his eyes off of her steven let's get into the next clip uh when you treaded water, Stephen Che, man, he was trying to fucking tread water and it was for cancer. Yeah. He was treading water for cancer. And Nick, you weren't here for this either. I wasn't.

Stephen looks buoyant. Yeah, but he does. You'd be surprised. Yeah, he is actually like an anvil. You throw him into the water and he's getting down to the bottom of it like a fucking detective. Bro, he's fucking quick to the bottom. Heavy ass man.

No treading ability. Couldn't do it for cancer. Just completely uncapable. Incapable. No cape on that man. Let's get into the clip. Damn, bro. It's been, it's had a big lead for a while.

Cancer has won. In the words of my, of late, great Jim Valvano, don't give up. Don't ever give up unless your arms get tired and you want to give up four minutes into a 15-minute treading water challenge. Then go ahead and give up because we don't actually care about raising money to save these kids. Fuck them kids.

Yeah, fuck them kids. That's what Stephen Che says. Yeah, that was a tough showing in the water treading competition for Stephen Che today. So to set the table for people who don't know, I actually don't know because we just convinced Stephen Che he had to

tread water for 15 minutes to get his new software. I don't even know. Like, I told him I was a lifeguard. It became a thing. It was one of those things. We got to the pool today, and we all kind of turned to each other. We're like, wait, why are we doing this?

He already got the software before we got there. He got the software. How did we get to treading water as a thing? No idea. No one remembers. No one remembers. That's a beast. Just like a suggestion. Do you want me to provide the backstory?

Yeah, go ahead. Try. So originally, I wanted to purchase the software for my film breakdown. So it's going to cost $5,000 a year. You got approval from Dave to do something. We were trying to throw out ideas. Roan suggested treading water for 15 minutes. So that was going to be the plan.

I think it was treading water or something. So this was a prank from all along. Yeah, we pretty much. This is a Roan. It was a random comment. A diabolical Roan move. We were Yeah, we pretty much. This is a Rome. It was a random comment. We were like, we'll never actually go do this. But then some things took a turn.

People found out that I was going to raise money for this thing that is very unique to me. The software. Oh, yeah. So then it turns out we actually have a guy who could basically make the same thing. So he made that and we decided the money would just go to charity. And then you decided to not give a full effort. It was to cancer, not your software. You already had your software. I gave a very full effort. A lot of people are asking, if you had

to tread water for 15 minutes to get your software, would you still be in that pool? I wouldn't be able to do it. Scientists are saying you would double that time. Yes. You would have died in that pool. Scientists commented on this? All right. So we'll set the behind the scenes stage of just a ridiculous day we show up um we show up we get there it's it's one of our co-workers parents uh their apartment building so we get there first thing

happens we get in this elevator and steven che looks at us dead serious he's like 36 floors i usually get nosebleed i hope i don't get a nosebleed i'm like what the fuck are you talking about so he's he thinks he's gonna get a nosebleed because we're going 36 floors up so write this down brandon walker our next challenge i said it in the elevator we're gonna make stephen che take a week's worth of uh blood thinners and take the elevator at the empire state building until he gets a nose bleed. And we'll raise money until you get a nose bleed. That's fair. That'll probably be a shorter challenge than the one today.

I don't know, bro. Did you see how short it was today? Dude, I can't hide. If we're going up real high, I can get a nose bleed pretty quickly. Okay. You're the weakest human being alive. We'll push every button, so we'll stop at every floor. Dude, I think if you take blood thinners and you get a those but you could like die definitely perfect and being that high you're

super far from the hospital yeah you are even further than the okay so we showed up we uh it was a hilarious scene because it's this little tiny pool at the top of this big building and there's people like swimming laps like there's an old lady swimming laps there's an old guy swimming laps there's a girl taking swimming lessons and we're like hey can we just get this corner real quick because we got to do a periscope of this fucking idiot treading water Stephen Che anyone

who wants to interject at any point he peed his pants right beforehand there was a small drop of pee that happened a visible stain that could have only been urine confirmed urine and uh that's a terrible sound effect going against me gonna get me go yeah it was just it was just generally um embarrassing there were more people there uh steven tried to talk too much he tried

to move his hands too much he shaved his chest in a triangle he shaved his chest and he shaved his uh landing strip what untrue okay so a few questions um what was what was the talk like with your wife this morning i i i imagined it would be like like going off to war and she was like we love you like we hope you come back don't die on us she wanted to make sure there was a lifeguard there and luckily there was and she didn't give a fuck. The lifeguard did not care at all. I would have had to save your life and I would not have.

Is that what that was? A lifeguard? Yeah, that was a lifeguard. I thought that was like a secretary. She was just chilling. She was totally chilling. What is this for? I was like, it's like a charity event. She was like, ugh. It's a charity event. It was a charity event. It was a sanctioned charity event. KB, actually the most exciting part of the entire

periscope was kb swore and i had to make him take a lap because like everyone people were like what i said i said the word fuck you said the fuck word yeah you did emphasized fuck yeah because i don't like your little fanboys in their study halls and in their social studies classes saying this sucks or this is boring. I don't think anyone said that. I said that. I apologize to the people that this was boring because Stephen Chay, if it had gone all 15 minutes, it would have been the most boring Periscope of all time.

Preemptively stopping that from happening. Yeah, so... That's why you said fuck, KB? I had to. I had to save our show. I thought it was going to be very boring. I thought he was going to last a little bit longer. A lot longer.

And I didn't want people in the comments saying this sucks. This is boring when it's a charity event. Right. Have you ever been to a charity event that wasn't boring? They're all boring. This might have been the most exciting charity event. Like walk for whatever. Relay for life.

It's not fun to watch. I said this, man. It's people walking. Showing up is half the battle. Yeah. And Stephen Shea, he lost the other half, but he did come. Yeah. He showed up.

You can say that. Yeah, he showed up. So, yeah, he did it. He was terrible. How much money did we raise? We're just pretty much on the notes of a thousand bucks. Well, I have people are Venmoing me money.

And that's not going to cancer. And they're like, send it. Maybe eventually. I don't have cash app. So here's this. Send it to Steve. Point blank. Cancer won today. Cancer won. There were kids out there that are like they probably there's a children's

hospital and they pulled away the lunch they're like hey guess what we just got word steven che only lasted four minutes in the pool no lunch today they turned out the radiation we don't have the money we don't have the money we were we were banking on this man lasting 15 minutes in the pool and he didn't sure then what if a kid just like calls in and it's like you let me down yeah you love me yeah actually let's do it call in 83385 stool if you beat cancer call in and let us know or the opposite or where where steven motivated you from fighting tell us where he went wrong give us the all 22 of how to beat cancer because clearly steven chay doesn't know how talk one thing I will say is talking, it went completely downhill for me once I talked and once I put my head underwater.

Those two things. Yeah, the head underwater was such a cocky move. Like a minute and a half in, you're like, oh, watch this. You guys told me to do it. I did tell you. Well, you're an idiot. Listening to Roan, usually not the best idea. Yeah.

All of it. All of it was so dumb. It was so dumb. It was faster. That made it way worse. And then KB and Caleb were trying to keep you towards the center with those pokies. Well, that's also

the thing. Technically, when my time expired is when I was getting poked with a broomstick. No, they were keeping you off the wall. There goes the MILF hunter wearing the sweatpants. The fucking expensive ass sweatpants. Can you only sorry one pair though

yeah so i didn't think the challenge would be over then i'm just basically like i stopped doing that or i'll hold on to it but then we stopped the clock at that point yeah and then on top of all of it you did an underwater challenge where oh my god you lasted do you smoke cigarettes? I have smoked a cigarette. Whoa. Uh? Eh? Eh? Gun rack?

And cigarette? Probably like 10 in my life. Whoa. You could see it. It showed today. It seemed like you did all of them last night. Did you put your lips up to a muffler this morning? Because you had no breath. 18 seconds is pathetic.

We didn't even say. He tried to hold his breath underwater as a redemption challenge for one minute, and he got 18 seconds. We could all do 18 seconds right now, right? If one of us just commentates it. You commentate it. Ready, set,

go. Alright, so we're doing the hold your breath challenge. Stephen Shea, are you doing it? No, you're not doing it. Gonzo's not doing it. Just the guys in here. roan's very calm and comfortable so is caleb big cat coley's struggling a little bit and kb looks like a fucking idiot kb you don't have to hold your nose kb you don't all right three are out everybody's out sorry why are you holding his nose like a fucking asshole scuba deep Scuba deep diving? It's ridiculous. Was anybody counting?

Hey, I mean, it's way past 18 seconds. Yeah, you win. KP looks so stupid. Well, if you don't hold your nose, you could be cheating. I can hold my breath for like a minute. You just puff your cheeks out too, though? 18 seconds when you're- It's nothing.

When you have a cold and you take a shower. You have asthma? Are you an asthmatic? You're an asthmatic? I was very out of breath from the challenge. It was a cardio gauntlet. See, did I not predict this? He's going to say he's sore.

Are you sore? Well, he's going to be sore. What do you want me to say to that? I want you to be honest because that's all you know how. Yes. You're sore. You are sore. You fucking complainer.

You know what would really be sore? If you had cancer. I'm just saying this is what's on the line. It's true. This know what would really be sore? If you had cancer. I'm just saying, this is what's online. It is true. This is what's online. You literally were doing a charity event for cancer research and you failed. CMV. 9% of women know about it.

2% of men. Now it's less than that. Yeah. I was trying to think of boy, aunt, Caitlyn Jenner. Damn, bro. Caitlyn Jenner to Kim Kardashian. Northwest's

boy as Caitlyn Jenner is to... The grandfather. It would not be North. No. He is the aunt. Whoa. First of all.

Who is the Jenner? Kris Jenner. We don't know who the uncle is. Who is Kris' kids? Brody Jenner. Yeah. Who are their kids? No, but they're cousins.

It would have to be the cousins of the Jenners. It would have to be the cousins of the Jenners. Nobody knows who they are. No. Boy aunt. Not the... Fine aunt. Refine aunts. Loans. cousins of the jenner's nobody knows who they are and then boy boy aunt not the fine aunt refine ants loans but just can't get there just can't get there buoyant steven please keep that part in because that's just uh a really nice peek behind the curtain of uh you know how the sausage gets made this next clip is from history

uh from and the annals of time and we don't really remember it that well but i remember there was a man named joe sinatra that sold cadillacs in north new jersey and that premise alone should be enough to just make something successful and funny on i'm sold i remember it being funny at the time um sinatra is one of those names that it's just like it's a famous last name that you don't expect anyone to have the name after the most famous person that had it no like it's like one of those names that should be retired like it's just sound it's off-putting when someone else has it like uh degenerous uh yeah no one travolta travolta is one if there's like another person a younger travolta yeah it's not gonna work and sinatra is like

travolta yeah in many ways. This is that segment. All right, so Ronan and I are going to pretend to be wanting to buy a car. I think horses move in flocks. Herds? Herd of horses? No. You have it? You have them. They're getting Charlie right now.

Perfect, perfect. We can wait. I told him my name was Brandon. Wait wait does he have to say he's burning no no i'm i'm gonna say that i want to buy a car charlie hey brandon how are you sir this is actually dan katz i'm uh we're calling from our radio show yak but i am with brand. So I'm speaking on behalf of Brandon. I'm going to be negotiating myself and my colleague, Adam Frone. We're going to be negotiating on behalf of Brandon. And we just wanted to talk to you about the car that we're looking at. All right. What were you looking at?

The CT6? I messed up. It's the XT6. XT6. XT6. Okay. Is there any way that you would be able to come in and meet with us? I'd have you meet directly with the sales manager, Joseph Sinatra.

Well, oh, Joseph D. Sinatra? Great guy. He can't sing, but he's a great guy. Is he related? I think he might be. I think somewhere along the way there was definitely some kind of relationship. Love it. So we would love to come in and speak with Joseph Sin sinatra but this is kind of our pre-meeting

meeting if you will so we just kind of want to get some nuts and bolts out of the way about the car and you know what what the price range is and what we're talking about upgrades in the package okay what were you looking for in the vehicle, we wanted a lot of space for puppies, but we've since given all the puppies away. So we don't need any room for puppies right now. But what does your sport option include? All right. Bear with me one second. Let me give you that information. Hold on.

No worries. Take as much time as you need. What color are we looking at boys okay uh let's see what we have here are the premiums higher if it's red yeah what yeah what are the yeah the colors some colors have you know a premium price on them you know the red is definitely a uh uh you know a you know a premium color. Okay. Nice. Okay. That makes sense. We're going to want white.

White. We're going to want white. White with a red stripe maybe, yeah. Yeah, racing stripes. So, yeah, what did you say, Ron? We wanted to know the indoor capacities for the sport version. What are the seating capacities inside the car? Okay. The car is a, it's a seven passenger.

You have the, obviously, you know, captain's chairs in the back, and then you have a bench in the third row. What's the accessibility from the trunk to the body of the car? Like if someone were to get locked in the trunk, can they freely get through to the body of the car? Like if someone were to get locked in the trunk, can they freely get through to the body of the car? Sure.

Okay. You can climb right over, climb over the third seat. I mean, if you want, I have Brandon's email address. I can definitely put something together, email you a little information on the vehicle, let you know some price ranges. I can also send you some links to the website So you can see the different packages

The premium and the sport And then if you want to step in We're in Nanuet I'd be more than happy to set up a meeting Yeah, that'd be great We'd all like to attend But just give me the base level No upgrades

What's the sticker price on that let's see uh if you know it yeah it's okay i gotta give me a ballpark i can if you stay on with me sure and i can let you know i can watch you i'm looking up at the at the website and i could let you know you know the range of what we have available right now okay great yeah take your time. No worries. No problem. That's our son in the background talking about the Xbox. Sorry about that.

Is it an Xbox or a Blu-ray death? Yeah, no, we don't have... No, I don't think they have Xbox in there, son. Right now on the X-T6, you'll get all-wheel drive or uh front wheel drive all wheel drive winners what i have right now i have a sport and i have a premium luxury figure the sport has an msrp of 62 185 okay and uh the premium luxury is got this particular one has a sticker price of $68,090. Get off.

What I'm going to do is I'm going to email you both links to the website, to these two vehicles, so you can see. And then you can look at the options, and there could be stuff that has more or less. But obviously, when you come in, if we don't have the vehicle in stock that you're looking for, particular color or trim level, we could something for you that's not a problem okay so the 62 000 sport how how about we say how about we call it 57 and i'll read you brandon's credit card over the phone right now that i i what what does he um qualify for in terms of rebates what what's currently is he leasing a cadillac is he leasing a non-gm vehicle non-gm vehicle currently owns it's a lemon so he owns okay i'm not gonna listen i listen can we be in the trust tree here i'm not gonna try to resell you the lemon because i respect

you charlie i don't want this to become a trade anything no because i don't want you to have to deal with the lemon i'm trying to be an upfront guy about this, and I'm hoping you maybe take a little, shave a little off the sticker price for that. What I can do is I don't do the numbers. Let me speak with the manager. Okay. And I can have either him give you a call back. Perfect. Is that the same number for Brandon?

Yes. Or is that a different number? Yeah. Have him call Brandon back. $55,000. We'll do a deal today. Cash. Cash deal.

Well, you said $57,000. All right. You said $57,000. No, I think I said 54. I'm going to bump it up 55 because I like you, Charlie. Let me see what I can do for you. Thanks, Charlie. We'll talk soon. You got it.

You got it, guys. Bye. I think we got a car. I think we just got it for 54. By the way, for people scoring at home, that's an old negotiation trick. You just start saying different numbers. It muddies the water. 57, then you say, yeah, okay, you know what? You're right, 55.

There's a movie called Kazan. It's a psychological phenomenon. Good work, Dan. I knew you would pull through. Brandon, you gotta be pumped. You gotta be pumped, dude. You just got a car for $54,000. There's no way I can deal with this guy now. I can't call this guy back. Joey Sinatra, you're not going to talk to him?

Joseph Sinatra? That's a hell of a name. How many cars do you think Joe Sinatra sells just because of his last name, Sinatra, in New Jersey? You know that that's like a stripper name. There's no way that's his real name. He was like Joe Polkowski, and they just switched it up to Joe Sinatra. He's Brian Smith.

Joe Stangione. But yeah, anyone in Paramus, they all love me. Joe Sinatra. Stripper name, Joe Sinatra. Yeah, you got a car. We forgot to ask if the tires were easily slashable. We forgot to. Well, there'll be more negotiating to do, Brandon,

but I'm sure you could just get it down from there, from 54. Yeah. Look at the 2019 models. We're only talking 2020 models. Yeah, I'm going to have to back off a little bit. Why don't we show up with you? Listen, this is a numbers game. If you show up with five people to a car dealership.

Oh, you think Joey Sinatra is not going to have guys there? No, that's fine, but we'll go guy to guy. We'll have guys. We'll have a bunch of... We'll grip their hands really tight when we shake them. Joe Sinatra is rolling deep. KB will wear his wrestling singlet. Yeah, I'm your son, remember.

And we'll just kind of hold him back. We'll put him on a leash. We'll actually have him on a leash. I'll clear my schedule. Yeah. Bring the coupons. An eco-friendly. Do cars come with Xboxes?

Could you imagine if we actually, for a second now, just visualize this. We show up. All of us. All the act crew shows up. We negotiate the fuck out of this deal All five of us, six of us sitting there Just beating down Joey Sinatra Getting every last cent out of him

And then right at the end We're like, Steven, come over Bang, coupon And we tell him, that's live Sinatra's gonna hate that I can't believe it I cannot believe it. Fuck.

I cannot believe it. We need it. Come on, man. Yeah, I'm going to have to spend this afternoon figuring out a car situation here. Just finance that thing, bro. Well, yeah. Well, there you have it. It looks like we figured it out.

I'll figure it out. What more is there to figure out? A lot. What? Finance the fuck out of it. can you know what you can do you have four kids take out some credit cards in their names yes ruin their credit for life just do it on a rotating payment between all your kids yeah just fucking pay one credit card off people in your family that means you would only have to pay two month payments i i made a mistake this is too far

into my life now this is? We got to get credit. No, no, no. I just I got to I got to buy a car on my own. I shouldn't have brought the car to the to the. No, I think we're going to help you, man. Listen, if anything, they respect us now. When they come in, they're going to be expecting the guy who just screwed up the numbers, you know, as a negotiating tactic, even though it wasn't a negotiating tactic. I'm just there's no way they could go over 57 now.

None. No way. I've anchored the negotiation. At 57. They cannot go higher than that. And, I mean, MSRP is 52. So, you know, they're raking you over the coals. You can go in there with some literature

and show them what's what. We'll get it down. We should have, like, a car in here like they have at malls, like, just for a raffle, and there's just a big car just sitting there. Sometimes in stadiums, there's just a pickup truck, and you can win this car. Just having a car in our foyer, that would give a different level.

Yeah, it looks nice. Cars indoors are cool. Cars in buildings look great. How did it get there? How did it get inside there? Yeah. Ten-year-old boys. Brandon?

He's a good dad. Except when he's not. Except to his four children. And never is that so apparent when he brings his ten-year-old boys in. He's a dad for radio. Yeah, he's a... Yeah. He likes to talk more about parenting than actually doing the parenting. He's like an analyst.

He's like a pundit of parenting. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, he is like a pundit. He's kind of a pundit of parenting. A pundit. A pundit, yeah. And he really talks about how much he does it.

But never is it so apparent how little he does it as when he brings his seed in like a fucking take your seed to work day he fucking schlubs his seed in in the back seat of his undersized suv fucking pays 72 to park for the day which is i guess cheaper than getting a babysitter for his kid and he he lets his young boy run roughshod around the office. Nick, you just stifled a yawn and it came out of your eyeballs. I've never seen that happen before. Yeah. Your eyes kind of started like wavering.

Yeah, you want me to push my eyeball and get the rest of the yawn out? Yeah. No one will like this. Nobody's going to like this. Kind of queef it. Oh, God. Jesus, dude. Oh, my God. That sounded like you were crushing a beetle yeah the car it did sound like

that you just drooled it's no let's focus on the gross one here nick just made a sound it's it was similar to stepping on a locust yeah let's Let's focus on that. It was. It sounded like in The Lion King when they're just eating the locusts. Grubs. Off the grub. They're eating the grubs off the tire. Tree bark. Tree bark. You've never seen this movie.

He's never seen The Lion King. I thought it was about cars. Is it not about cars? No. I forget what movie that is. That's Cars. Oh, Cars. Cars 2.

Cars 2 was a detective film. It wasn't about cars. It was not. It wasn't really? Who was? It was a detective film it wasn't about it was not it was really yeah who who was it was a different cast nope same exact fucking cars really yeah but they were detectives i think cars wasn't about yeah those are the only pixar movies that i haven't seen and also refuse to see yeah i looked up cars under in jeff lowe's movie site and cars two didn't come up just cars he. He won't even do it. Herbie fully loaded.

There were... Not Cars 2. Oh, so he does car... In Herbie's defense. He was fully loaded. Yes, he was the most loaded. Less loaded than Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, though. Chitty Chitty Bang Bang was a loaded-ass car.

I don't like to pit jalopies against one another. What do you know about CCBB? Chitty Chitty Bang Bang was a loaded ass car I don't like to pit jalopies Against one another What do you know about CCBB Chitty Chitty Bang Bang Flying car Like at the end of Grease Like the end of Grease Like the end of Grease 2 No just Grease

Grease 2 was a motorcycle movie Oh yeah fuck And they only had one good song in Grease 2 Crash was a motorcycle movie. Oh, yeah. Fuck. And they only had one good song in Grease 2. Crash. Crash was a racial movie. Crash. I don't know what Crash is. Into me.

Sienna. It's a song by Dave. The Dave Matthews Band. DMB. Fire Dancer. As it were. You still getting sushi? Should be here.

But you know what I could use? Motherfucking cigarette. Oh, shit. Well, you know who could use one more than you is the young youth that we were just talking about. Tommy Walker. Yeah. He almost got cigarette-ed and we tried to do it to him and and he was resistant to SIGs. So enjoy this clip.

Okay. And it is... I ranked items 1 to 200. Okay. So you have the option to take a second ball, or if you get a high-numbered first ball, you could subtract with your second ball. Wait.

Okay. Hold on. Oh, man. That didn't second ball. Wait, okay, hold on. That didn't make sense. Everyone pull it up. Okay, yeah, you gotta read it. The participant must pull at least one. Alright, here it is. Tweet it out, Nick. The participant must pull at least one ball. If they're unhappy with their meal,

they have the option to pull a second ball and add its total to the first. Okay, that makes sense. All right. New element. If you pull a high first ball, you can subtract from the second. If you go into the negatives, you fast. Wait, wait, wait.

If you pull a high first ball, you subtract? So let's say you pull a 93. Okay. And you don't like what the 93 range is. You could pull a second ball and say you're subtracting. But if you go into the negatives, yeah, Brandon? This is great. So can you read them to us?

Sure. All right. If you pull a one, that is just the number one, just so people know. Just the number one. That's filet mignon. Two to ten is spicy cauliflower. This is what you're allowed to buy this is what you have to buy yeah you have to buy and we know we have somebody who will fund and buy them yes who so don't worry about the order what's daniel cat okay uh two to twenty is an iceberg salad, no dressing, nothing, just iceberg. How is that even a salad?

21 to 30 is a honeydew milk bubble tea. Don't ask dumb questions, dude. 30, 31 to 40 is a pack of Marlboro Reds from 7-Eleven. I kind of want that. 41 to 50 is a Melt Shop honey chicken sandwich. Oh, that's their best one. 51 to 60 is the rest of Roan's cake. 61 to 70 is Sbarro Pizza.

71 to 80, Roan, there's like a pixel on my screen I can't read. 71 to 80. Almost out of it. Thank you. 81 to 90 is a Five Guys Cheeseburger. 91 to 100 is B.W. Carlin's Choice. Oh, my God. 101 to 100 is B.W. Carlin's choice. Oh my God.

101 to 110 is Asada Tacos. 111 to 120, sweet and sour pork. 121 to 130 is a 7-Eleven beef patty, Jamaican. 131 to 140 is a Crunchwrap Supreme. 141 to 150 is 60 McNuggets no dipping sauce. Dry? Dry, yes. 60 McNuggets. 151 to 160 is a six pack of Ham's Beer.

161 to 170 is a Cat's Deli Pastrami Sandwich. 171 to 180 is a BBQ Pulled Pork Sandwich. 181 to 190 is a Rainbow Sushi Roll. And 191 to 199 is a barbecue pulled pork sandwich. 181 to 190 is a rainbow sushi roll. And 191 to 199 is a lobster tail. So all of these items are available on Uber Eats or a different delivery app within 30 to 40 minutes.

So we should go now. We should go now. But we can't start. And it's very random. Well, we have to commit to this bit with a creed. Oh, yes. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. Caleb, are you going to actually follow the rules this time or are you going to go get a salad?

I have every time according to Stephen Chey. And I will continue to follow. Wow. Tommy looks exactly like Brandon. There he is. Same color shirt, too. What up, Tommy? That's Caleb over there. Professional golfer to be. What up, Tommy? Hey, Brandon. First time you ever met him. That's Caleb over there. What's up, Tommy?

Professional golfer to be. What up, Tommy? Tommy, you ready for some cake? Right. Say yes. All right. He nodded. One, two, three.

The Lunchman's Creed Part Two. The fate of the sphere. I vow to accept what fate has in store. From lunch to dinner and even more. The machine is my God, the balls his servant. It knows when we obey, always observant. It decides for me whether distant or near. I will welcome its wisdom, the fate of the sphere.

I will enjoy my meal, I have faith in the lotto. And if I behave, I shall be gifted saltato. All right. We can trade. What happens now? What happens now? We can trade. We have 39 minutes, so let's try to figure out what a Yankee swap is in that time period.

Okay. I don't think we can Yankee swap if we all have an item. Yeah, it is illegal for a kid to have cigarettes. He probably needs to go to Tommy. No, but the lottery machine decided so. The law doesn't count. Yeah, it's legal. You could swap with your pa.

Talk into the mic. We're not going to get arrested. Go talk to the mic. Go talk to the mic. No, because the lottery machine might get arrested. We're not. The lottery machine. He was playing the lottery.

You guys chose this. No, the lottery. Tommy, you actually. He thinks we manipulated this. I'm not. I don't want to point fingers. They did, Tommy. That's what they did.

I don't want to point fingers or anything, guys, but who's hitting the button? Me, but I. Oh, Tommy. You told me to hit it for you. I know. We did. We did. We did.

That's on me. That's on me, Tommy. So, Tommy. I think you get to pick between addition and subtraction. Can I take a time out? You're doing an awesome job. Can I take a time out? Yeah, your son's got to smoke cigarettes.

I have to do a lot of lobbying with my wife to bring my kid into the city to go to Barstool Sports headquarters. She does. She's not comfortable with it. I said, nothing's going to happen to him. We're 20 minutes into the show. He's already got to smoke a pack of Marlboro Ritz. Sure does. Add or subtract.

Then there's no zero. Also, you can stand in his. No, he gets to add or subtract. No, but you can stand in the way. You can stand in his place. And give up my cheeseburger? Yes. I got three boys.

How about this? How about this? Let's change it. Because he is young and we don't want it to be a big thing. Let's change it to menthols. Yeah. Is he going to do addition? Yeah.

Tommy, are you going to do addition? Is there a double zero in there? He says subtract. No, no, no, no. You do not want to subtract menthols. Yeah. Is he going to do addition? Yeah. Tommy, you going to do addition? Is there a double zero in there? He said subtract. No, no, no, no. You do not want to subtract. Addition. Yeah. No, no, no.

No, no, no. Hit it, Tom. Do you want to add or subtract? What do I get? Subtract. This is determining your lunch. You don't get to eat if you subtract, potentially. Yeah.

You want to add. You want to add. Add. He added. All right. He's got 40. If he subtracts, add. You want to add. Add. He added. All right. He's got 40. If he subtracts, he could get a filet mignon. 40.

So you're going to add this number, Tommy. 12. Sbarro? Cake. Oh, no. With the cake. With the cake. With the cake.

With the cake. With the cake. With the cake. No, no, no. No, no, no. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Cake. All right. No, no, no. Yeah. Yeah. Cake.

All right. Let's make this even. KB and Tommy are going to eat the rest of that cake. Enjoy your lunch, Tommy. And that's been the show, folks. I hope that you have not had too much nog. I hope that you have your had too much nog. I hope that... I hope you have your costume taken off.

I hope your penis hasn't fallen out of your robe. But if it has, business is business. Business is business. Happy Thanksgiving, you turkeys. Stupid ass motherfuckers. Dumb motherfuckers. Little did you know that we're in here with Caleb. The lost member of the Yak.

Yeah. I heard that you talked about uh the yak on 51 strokes dude well first of all i did but did you see on the yak shirt they made me and you not the same size what did they make us the yak shirt that's for sale we are not the same size when in fact in life we are pretty close we're the exact same size similarly sized so you might even and you can tell which side i came out on because of my gripe yeah i didn't notice anything yeah right i might be feeling real good about it it's a good shirt though maybe this could be our promo hour do we have merch the yak does have merch we are helping i want to i want more yak merch though i want to i want some lifestyle shit for the yak what do you want a sweatsuit yeah i mean i'm with that i thought you were going to say something else like a...

Oh, a trackie? A track jacket? Corduroy jacket? Like a heroin needle or something. That would be super lifestyle. Not to use,

but just to have. Not like Supreme put something on the wall. Something edgy. Or like a gold heroin needle. Like a platinum heroin needle that you can't even use, but it's just really swaggy

to hang on the wall. You know what I was thinking about recently? You know how whenever weed started getting tight and Wiz Khalifa got in it and then now he has his own, he's like basically the kingpin of weed? Bro.

What if we get into meth now and go to Oregon? It's genius. And I'm even taking it a step further. We saw Marlboro try to get into weed and they're selling weed. Like Marlboro is selling Marlboro brand cigarettes. Yes. Marlboro Greens? Marlboro try to get into weed and they're selling weed. Like Marlboro is selling Marlboro brand cigarettes. Yes. Marlboro Greens? Marlboro Greens.

Yeah. Dead ass. And it's in a green packaging. That's what they're really called? It looks like a pack of cigarettes, but it's like joints and spliffs and stuff like that. When are we going to see big companies get into the legalized drugs? We're going to see Pepsi making Coke. And that's true. It's crazy. i just fact checked it three times we're gonna

have big brands that are making coke and there's gonna be people who are lifestyle heroin addicts yeah like this is like dope as fuck like kurt cobain was cool or something right exactly but it's gonna be legal so it's gonna kind of even be soft yeah it's taking the edge out of doing drugs i think we're in that golden era right now where we could get in and we could hit it big. But are you worried that A, you'll like it or B, it'll ruin your life? I wouldn't do it. No. Oh, you would just pose?

Yeah. That's what all the bad. You think Wiz Khalifa smokes weed? He doesn't even smoke weed. How would he have all this time to think about these big brands he's building? He's too lucid to be on all the weed he's saying. He has like 55 businesses. Yeah. Burner is just like his guru

who's just like trying it out. Right, yeah, he's just trying it out for him. No, but people should, if they're listening, we do have one shirt. So maybe it's almost like a limited time offer type thing because we probably eventually will have two shirts or other products and then you would be like... But I think yak leisure wear is the next line

and it's for when you're in your opium then. You're doing heroin, you're fucking chilled the fuck out. We want pants with elastic waistband and a real comfortable shirt. We should talk to KFC and see what he's thinking. Yeah, what does he have? KFC Radio Times yak crossover merch.

For heroin and opium. It's just like a 1 to one to three p.m crossover that's fucking genius bro or or we could do um it might be funny to we're not funny this is probably the least thing for funny but it might be great to do this is less funny more great lunchwear yeah lunchwear you know for people who uh work a job but go home for lunch and then they just they they slip into their lunch clothes so they don't get their work clothes all dirty you know how it's super cool to not like it's cool to have a branded clothing but it's even cooler to have branded clothes with no brand yes exactly we do one of those for lunch and it's

like a it's like a paper sack and it's just brown but it has no yak in case you spill on it you mean or just a brown paper sack for lunch you put your lunch in but we just don't and you okay so i don't want to over brand it with too many logos is this clothes or is this a bag this is a bag yeah it's genius it's absolutely genius. I was thinking it was like a sack you bring your lunch in. When you take your lunch out of the sack, you put on the sack to wear it. I don't know. But I mean, no, yeah, I think that that's, I mean, that's why it was essential that you

get onto this special best of holiday episode of great gift. Great gift. Great gift. Enjoy your Thanksgiving, everyone.