The Yak - Are Brandon Walker & Ben Mintz Household Names In Mississippi? | The Yak 10-15-21

Episode Date: October 16, 2021

Ebony = Cap DetectedYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak

Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. This is the first ever green yak. This yak is powered by the energy built up from Brandon's ancestors rolling over in their grave. No, no. built up from Brandon's ancestors rolling over in their grave. Not really my ancestors. No, Brandon, no. Let me get off you before you get... He's got a boner. My dick's not going to get hard.

Hey, guys. What's up? Is there any way to turn the headphones down? They are loud. You've almost been on this show for a year. Yeah. There's never been a way. It was more of a question for the people in the back.

Those faceless, nameless fucks. Well, I can't see them, so I don't even know who's back there. Hey, Owen. TJ, I saw you leaving Penn Station today. You're the slowest walker in the city. Yeah, I was pretty much asleep still. Okay. I sleep on the train every day.

Were you blocking people? Because that's a problem. Was that a fat joke? Were you blocking people? Because that's a problem. Was that a fat joke? Were you blocking people from... That's probably why you sleep. Dick. Sorry, brother. Tomorrow, 5.30 p.m.,

Chelsea Pier, the G League, Pat's Basketball League. Yeah, yeah. Nick's coming to show me. He's going to show his support. He's coming to my gay basketball league tomorrow night and watch me play twice a double header he has one game that's right uh tell us about that should we all go yeah i'd love it if everyone listening could go too

what's the skill level like in the gay league better than yours i don't have a league pat i was just asking pat has like 90 blocks a game because everybody shoots uh granny style that's right it's good it's uh everybody try to box better than i the box outs are box out is their chant for for women let's get the fucking pussy out get it out of here get that pussy out nick's gonna come low come out. She'll be good. So, Pat, you're in a... It's strictly gay? You cannot be straight. They enforce that law?

No. You have to be gay. So we're going to do a video. Brandon's going to Juana man the situation. Where Brandon walks in. How do they test? Do you just... It's an honor.

You have to suck to get in. You're good at that, huh? Hell yeah. Would you suck to average a triple-double in a basketball league, Brandon? Which league? NBA. NBA. I would suck multiple dicks for that, yes.

Sure. So you have a... I mean, I'm a millionaire at that point. Are you a millionaire now, though? I have summers off. I'm close. Are you? No.

How much money do you have? Not that much. But you got those kids... Well, you think I'm Casey? I don't No. How much money do you have? Not that much. But you got those kids. What, you think I'm Casey? I don't make a lot of money here. No, but you got those kids that can work the farm. You got like 10 of them, don't you? I live in New Jersey.

You got it. Okay. Ebony. Welcome back. Thank you. What do you have? Fatigue from doing all these shows? No, I just feel offended that you were trying to replace me.

Y'all was trying to replace me? Replace you? I was trying to replace me. With who? Don't do that. Oh, with Tico? We just thought that was you. Don't do that.

That's fucked up. Don't do that. Wait a minute. Why would you automatically assume if Tico's on, we're trying to replace you? I understand there's only two black girls here. Are you threatened by that? Absolutely. How do you think I feel surrounded by these white men?

Every single show, they're replacing me. Yeah, but it's like, you feel safe around, you know, this is a room full of sexy guys. Well, some. Let me stop lying. Let's pay him. I noticed you looked at Pat and then said that, the second part. No. You don't think Pat's attractive.

Pat. Pat. Where would you rank me in this room? Rank the room. Rank the room right now room rank the room rank the room right now rank the room okay um so patty you're like all right so from one to ten yeah all right so patty you're like a i'm a soft six i was gonna say a four you pushing it i thought we were allies what the fuck is this pat's like has has a good body and is tall as shit. I'm a four? Then what does that make Brandon?

Why? Watch this. What's that make me? Oh, look. Brandon is like four and a half. Oh my god. Brandon's is four and a half. Goddamn.

Nick is an even ten. Nick is an even ten. I have been trying out the whole ten thing lately. Girls like Nick. He's got that hipster beat. What is there not to like about Nick? He's a little dirty looking. I kind of like that.

He doesn't shower. You can't. No. You don't shower then. He has no strength whatsoever. Brandon, shut up four and a half. No muscular development. Shut up four and a half.

He's got that Bailey Carlin, no muscular development. Please. My guy KB. I feel like you had a good couple days. But I don't want to push it either. I don't want to do the most just because we're cool now. Okay. I'll give you a high two.

I'll give you a high two. There we were back. Such terrible scores for everyone. Because no one in here to me Is a ten No one is above a five here Oh Nick

Nick is a ten Nick is a ten Nick is a ten Damn I mean we can't really argue this Let's keep going But we know this already Owen

What is I mean we just have to take these numbers And all women have to agree Yes Owen Owen is like I'll give him a three I gotta get out of this room

Wild disparity here And we leave the best for last And this is Hard for me Because I'm determining the shoes The fit, the looks. I'm going to give you a one. You're a one.

Yeah. That was tough. Why, though? You're a one. I kind of look like all these guys. You don't. It's a one. I had girls throwing bras at me last night.

It's because they felt bad for you. They're like, oh, look at him. You just throw some fucking bras at him. I actually had a girl's boyfriend bring me his girlfriend's bra. Because he felt bad for you. What man you know is going to bring you his girlfriend's bra cause he felt bad for you what man you know is gonna bring you his girlfriend's bra did you sniff it no smell like titty I threw it away um a dude brought

you his girlfriend's bra right cause he felt bad for him that's a run of the mill cuck hold it's a cuck I called him a cuck so you've been on the girl yak lately that's your role what the fuck when does that come out um I don't know yet but we're just testing it out right now See if it works

No, I think he was gonna shout it out like that, but okay who's on it Something something kind of like what you guys do talk about shop we talk about a little bit of everything I don't talk about shopping don't like a shop. I just what women be shopping we're in jordan's yes what the what are you i'm motherfucking ebony what you think she's doing all this content with all these other people are you jealous i told you we could make a movie but you know the jim crow hustle award winner wait did they zoom in because they want to see my tatas or they just zoomed in because they want to see my sweater tj's hor zoomed in Because they want to see my sweater TJ's horny on the camera

TJ's horny on the camera TJ You know I like me some big boys Big boy I don't discriminate What's TJ TJ thank her Yes

TJ What's TJ on the ranking Put your face Let me see your face Oh Shit God damn He knows his angle

Yeah you see I was gonna give you like a three but I'm gonna give you a one I didn't like that face I didn't like I didn't like what you just did I didn't like what you just did

but I love me some big boys I thought you liked the face no I like the fact that he's thick he's thick you know so when I'm on top it's like I got a lot TJ us ones gotta stick together

thank you feel like an exercise ball exactly a core workout TJ so Thank you, Eddie. I feel like an exercise ball. Exactly. A core workout. TJ, so can we get an update on UTEP? See how they're doing in the competition? Maybe go to the YouTube video, see how they're faring? So Brianna Chickenfly is doing the college blackout tour,

the hungover tour. What's it called? Blackout. What is this? College dropout. Who's watching TV? And the. What is this? It's called Dropout. Who's watching TV? And the most comments on her YouTube video.

She gets to go there. And KB has skewed the polls. I suggest it UTEP. And it is winning, I think. I don't know. We'll check. No, the last I checked, Miami of Ohio had a slight lead. Over UTEP? Oh, yeah.

UTEP had a few lead. Over UTEP? Oh, yeah. UTEP had a few. What's UTEP? Had a few, yeah. University of Texas, El Paso. Oh. What is that? El Paso is beautiful. What's going on with our tech in here?

It's a big school. It's a large school, yeah. Big city. One of the biggest. What do you know about El Paso? It is the Miami tour stop video. Is the stream just out completely now? I would guess.

So we're broadcasting this to no one? No, no, no. It looks like they just pulled up the video. So we're still live? Are we live? Okay, let's see. We can't see that. That's a tiny little screen.

Our TV's out. Get it together, Zah. That is Zah's fuck up. Keep going, keep going. All right, so that's just kitchen nightmares. We're watching Gordon Ramsay. That's a happy accident. I like how they just expose themselves for watching TV during the show.

You guys have been watching kitchen nightmares the entire time? Is that why you can't spell stethoscope? That's not an easy word to spell. No, it's not hard. You should go on the college tour. Who? You should go on the college tour. When's the last time you've been on a campus?

I don't get... Never. I don't get invited to shit, first of all. From whom? From no one. I think the only person that invited me to something was you. And I had to decline that. What was it?

I just invited her out for drinks one day. That's all cap. No, you didn't. What do you mean? All cap, fake news. No, no, no. I think you mean cap detected. No, no, no.

I can say what I want, cap detected. Here you go with the robot shit. I don't like that shit. We talked about it. It's not a fucking robot. He should be losing points. Oh, shut up, one. He's down to a nine now He should be losing points. Oh, shut up, one. He's down to a nine now.

Okay, let's see here. UTEP is where it's at. UTEP by far the most underrated. UTEP is the best. Unreal this time of year. UTEP throws bangers. All right, all right. Not looking bad for UTEP.

Not looking bad for UTEP. Okay. So we got a lead, but I'm not comfortable with this lead. Did Mia Khalifa actually go to UTEP? Did she? I don't know. Who's that? The minors of UTEP deserve that.

It's a porn star. It's an actor. UTEP all day. Oh, my God. All right. Decent lead. I just know Miami of Ohio has the F-star power that might come in late. Okay, yeah.

I'm just going to be honest. I'm not comfortable with this lead. Okay. Okay, so far, so good. Okay. Okay, so far so good. Tevo, the king of Miami. Okay, that's fine. Utah, okay. So that's one more for Utah.

It's okay. Utah minors. All right. Okay. It's not looking bad Kyle I found that there's a dope highlight video of UTEP can we pull that up it's like a party highlight but it doesn't have

any people in the video can we pull up the DM you got as well Kyle what do you show at a party if you don't show people what's his DM some red solos What do you show at a party if you don't show people? It's a cool... What's his DM? Some red solos. A DM is a direct message.

Which one did he get? From a lady? No. Yeah, like this very old Yak fan sent me a message. Can we pull up KB's Instagram story? Thank you. And what was the message? I really do got to get new shoes. Yeah, those aren't even shoes anymore.

They're beat down. That's probably why you were a woman. I took a shower today, so. You're rank right now? I'm ranky. You're ranky. Goddamn. Fresh off the Amtrak.

Was it a fun show? Brian just doesn't stop. Oh, yeah, it is. Can we turn that volume up? To the girls on the show. You were real mean to Beeman and Faith the Clown, and you could obviously fuck both of them if you were nice. Look at Jersey Cherry.

He was such a sweetie pie about Tito, Texas. I know you're sober and afraid to fuck the shit out of a pussy, but I want to see you get that cut. So that guy has like 70,000 Instagram followers. I did find that out. Yeah. Are you afraid to fuck the shit out of a pussy? Yes.

That's mortifying. Why would anybody want to do that? That should drop him down points on the scale. Yeah. We've talked time and time again how the mental body count, what did you call it? What? No, we've talked about this.

Yeah, it feels way better to mentally seal the deal than to actually physically do it. Mentally sealing the deal significantly better than actually doing it. When's the last time you did it, KB?

Like, guys would rather leave the bar with their boys and be like, I totally could've fucked that girl. KB pretty much fucked a girl on the subway station because she complimented his jacket. That was it.

Then you play it out in your head and it always ends well. You fuck and then... How's it end? She was shocked but she expected it to be good but still a little bit shocked. That's always the case. She wipes the sweat off her brow

and is like, shit. And that's how it ends. Just like that? Usually. It's the best. So they always end up leaving just completely shocked.

But they aren't too shocked. They knew they were going to get their shit pummeled. Shit pummeled. All cap. All cap. You don't have dick like that. You don't have dick like that. You don't have dick like that.

You ain't got no print. What happened to you? You're late to the game. You're tired. He's got no print. We need other jokes. We honestly need other jokes. You want me I'm tired You're late to the game You're tired Look at KB He's got no print He's in joggers He's got no print We need other jokes

I saw both We honestly need other jokes You need other jokes I'm not talking about I'm not talking about The dick you don't have I didn't say that That's your only joke

I didn't say that I didn't want to talk about that Because everybody in America Know you don't have a dick KB when's the last time KB when's the last time KB when's the last time You saw

Everybody in America Did you hear about Kyle's penis That's That's a lot to take That dick No just Like accept the

The fact that Everyone in America Knows you don't have Print game like that Like he knows this This is why he looks at me The way he does He's still getting pussy

Without a dick I doubt it That's incredible I doubt it He's probably eating pussy Nobody's gonna let them Put that little shit inside them. What's wrong with that? That's a whack body.

If you got to fuck KB, that's a whack body. What do you mean a whack body? Like I said, a whack body. What does that mean? It's useless. It's useless. It's useless to fuck. It's not a physical body.

They don't want to add that. You're not a good tally. It's an asterisk. Right. We don't need to add you to the tally it's like oh we fuck five guys oh we fuck kb is four now like we don't need like oh my god so still getting mine so what is that doesn't affect me whatsoever oh no she didn't add me to her account so kb reverses the count i would love to i would love to negative fuck yeah i would love to speak to the girls

that you actually fuck honestly if you can convince people girls that you're a negative fuck? Yeah. I would love to speak to the girls that you actually fuck. Honestly, if you can convince girls that you're a negative fuck, they'd probably like that. That would work, yeah. I got a KB fuck story, but he'll get mad if I tell it. Don't tell the KB fuck story. Please tell it. Don't tell it. I want to hear it.

No, he doesn't. I want to hear it. It has to do with my old roommate. No, it did not happen. Yes, it did happen. Look at his face. Look at the death stare. I want to hear it, Patty.

Let me hear it. You need to redeem yourself. Is it like that? KB may have had a little. He came over. What was it? My birthday or something? And then I woke up and KB was just there in my roommate's bed.

Where was I sleeping? You claimed you were sleeping at the foot of the bed like a dog. Is that true, Kyle? Yes. So you went to. that's almost worse. Worse than what? Than not. Obviously.

I'm not trying to, yeah. That was the case. You don't have a KB fuck story. She didn't want to smash? No one has a KB fuck story. If you have a KB fuck story, call in. That's KB, that's why. You having fun, Brandon?

Yeah, no, I'm having a good time. I like to talk about fucking. Brandon, why aren't you out in Tennessee? That's a good question. Nobody's there yet. We're going tomorrow. They're all there. They're not all there.

They told me not to tell you. We're flying out tomorrow at 11 o'clock. No, no. They're already there. They're there. Dan's there. They're filming today, actually. Casey's there.

Are they coming back to get me tomorrow? No. What's happening with me? They got you an amtrak ticket to tennessee yeah i should leave soon then it's gonna be fun it's actually not that long i've checked to knoxville yeah at least eight hours 10 hours oh no i think it's more like 15 15 yeah that'd be long pittsburgh is 11 yeah sass convinced me i missed my stop this morning it was actually pretty brutal i actually that wasn't even the goal the goal was for me to convince you that i got off at the wrong stop but then i just caught him off guard like i said we weren't sitting together and i was like i was like where are you no you said did you knock it off yeah

and i thought he was gonna be like dude like that was the wrong stop. But instead he was like, oh, fuck. Like, I had my headphones and I wasn't paying attention. Were you panicked? No, I didn't really care. I let it go on for about one-tenth of a second. Oh, okay. Yeah. I'm not really good at holding those things out for long. Roan will change you.

Roan will just lie and take it to the grave. Yeah. After he throws a spiky plant at you. Brandon. Hey. Where'd you get your haircut? Well, I got my... Sport clips.

No, I... We're not good? Where'd you get your haircut, Brandon? Be honest. Separate yourself from the company. I can't just tell us and be 100% honest. Give a personal endorsement from where you got your haircut. I can't.

Can somebody else read that? I don't have paper. I go to Fleischman. Did Brittany Fleischman do it? No, it's not Brittany. Who's Brittany Fleischman? Erica Fleischman does my hair. She does a great job.

She's fantastic. And I've already gotten in trouble with her, so why don't you guys read the ad? I don't have it. I don't have it. I don't have it. Slow down with sport clips. How come Stephen Chay's not here? Yeah, why isn't Chay here?

Oh, he's in Knoxville. Feels like a Swedish sauna. The printers are broken. There's seven pressure point technology at Sport Clips. We'll have you melting in your chair. I'm pretty sure it's not just a haircut. It's an experience. I think CEO Dylan Miskovitz wanted to design the best haircut.

That's right. And these haircuts are NASA-level shit. Kyle, anything else? Yeah, they play the games on the screen so you can get your haircut, watch the games. It's not like your grandma's haircut. It's a lot different. It's like you're with the boys, except you're getting your haircut. You're looking better.

Let's try and drag this hat in for the next one. A haircut shouldn't feel that relaxing. But it does. It's sport clips haircuts. That's because stylists don't just wash your hair. They use a seven-pressure-point massage shampoo technique that feel that relaxing. But it does. It's Sport Clips Haircuts. That's because stylists don't just wash your hair. They use a seven-pressure-point massage shampoo technique that is so relaxing, you already hit the spot. We already got that part.

We already said all this. And the hot steam towel? Oh, yeah. No, it feels like a Swedish sauna. It's made with tea tree oil and perfectly steamed. What's it feel like? It's like you just left a Swedish sauna. We know that.

And to top it all off, you get a pinpoint cut. Stop by Sport Clips today and ask about the MVP haircut experience. It's ridiculously relaxing. Sport Clips, the pros in men's hair. That's right. When we arrived at the Penn Station today, people were cheering. For what? No idea.

Like when the train got there? I've never heard that happen ever. Oh, that's bad. Yeah. Woo! Maybe it was like a group of people who were going to New York for the first time or something. Did you make that up? No, I just went in.

That keeps us happening. We were in the same car. This is good. It was my car. Riff, riff. And they were. That was a good finish. They were.

They were. Owen was in a different car. So how was Philly? How many cars away were you? Tell us about that. I was in first class. No one was in coach. Fucking poor ass.

So you guys were decoys for Trent. Yeah, you guys just got completely overshadowed. Well, that was Roan's idea. We weren't even supposed to have Trent there. Like, they didn't know Trent. Like, Ria and Fran didn't know Trent was going. Oh. Yeah, it was actually pretty cool.

It was fun. The noises that were coming out when Trent went on on stage was like the loudest thing i've ever experienced like i you couldn't even like hear yourself think because it was so loud it was like when you're like front row at a concert yeah yeah like that yeah that's it that's when trent comes out in his like jesus christ his knee buckle watch his knee buckle. Watch his knee buckle. He was like the most badass intro. He hurt himself. That right quad was maxed out. It was like the most badass intro, though.

He came from like all the way back in the back of the, like everyone else comes from like down the stairs and he came all the way back. So Trent gets on stage and people go insane. And then what? Yeah, then what? Then we just did like a q a we were only up there for like 10 15 minutes okay no to end it no he answered a couple questions oh uh one yeah yeah did anyone try to like bring you back to their hotel no i saw some like tweets like asking like where are you where is sass going out where is s Sass going? After this. Oh, yeah. Can Sass come to my... I didn't know.

Yeah? Did you go after... Me and Owen went to Patty's bar. That's an experience. That man has touched a bra before. It was weird. It was like his dude's girlfriend... Like, this dude gave me his girlfriend's bra. I was like, this is weird.

Dude, they wanted you to cuck. That's cuck play. Like, what was I supposed to do? Everyone was like... I got, like, a comment that was like, does this dude even like titties what did you want me to do like pick it up and start smelling it on stage

guys who like titties will handle the bra what was there what did they want me to do with the bra put it on yeah what would a guy who likes titties do with that bra you go fully trans on stage you start putting on makeup the comment was literally it was like this guy doesn't even this guy looks like he doesn't even like titties or boobs You go fully trans on stage. You start putting on makeup.

The comment was literally, it was like, this guy looks like he doesn't even like titties or boobs. This guy doesn't like titties. He doesn't like boobs. What? Somebody threw a full purse at him. What?

They just gave him a wallet. They just gave him a purse. Was there money in it? No. What's the end goal of throwing a purse at somebody? They were front stage. Just like take everything. Very interactive show. Fans were like

getting up on stage without anyone asking them to. They have security at these things? Yeah, Noah. Noah's frisking people at the door?

No, I don't think there's security. Was there? No. Oh, it was security. Yeah. Women are crazy. We are.

We went to Patty's Pub the original Patty's Pub like what the show is based off of which was funny because we were like in there

and I was like there's no way this is what the show is based off of right and Owen was like no and then we like

looked to the left and there's just a picture of the whole cast yeah in the bar really did he open it

up after the show no it was based on the whole show he based it on that and then he bought it oh cool I didn't know that no I don't think it on that and then he bought it. Oh, cool.

I didn't know that. No, I don't think he bought that. I think he has a bar next door or down, like a block away. But it's closed right now. It's inside. There's Mr. Barstool.

Yeah, that picture is god awful. I don't even like looking at it. Why? Why does my face look like that in the picture? You look like that every day, though. That's you, Sass? Doesn't look like me, does it?

It doesn't look like you at all. Why is it so big? I don't know. Why are you putting it away? That's you, Sass? Doesn't look like me, does it? That doesn't look like you at all. Why is your clothes so big? I don't know. Why are you putting it away? That's a bad pic. That's a bad pic. That's a fucking bad pic. Put it away.

He looks like he's got swollen face from like medication. He looks like I had like a, like I just had my wisdom teeth removed. You said it, not me. I don't know what it is, but that location.

He's got a chemo face. I did the Mr. Barstool pic in March in front of that store and it's the worst picture I've ever taken. Wait, but that location. It's got a chemo face. I did the Mr. Barstool pic in March in front of that store, and it's the worst picture I've ever taken. Wait, can we pull up Brandon's? I had COVID. I got COVID the next day, so I had COVID when I took the picture.

I didn't know it. But it's the worst picture I've ever taken in front of that Mr. Barstool. How many times did you have COVID? I only had it once. Six. But it seems like you had it for three months. What? Why was that a lot?

I only got it once. Yeah, but you had it early and often. You were hit hard. I got it right in April. The weekend of the Final Four, that's when I got it. I had it for two weeks. I was gone for two weeks. We had a contingency plan.

We actually had discussions about if you died from it. Okay, what were the contingency plans? We'd have to wipe our COVID episodes where we made jokes. Right. Then we'd just have to take a day off the act. Who's raising Tommy? Your wife, Ebony. Obviously.

I want Tommy to go with one of you guys. You do? Ebony will raise him. Can I raise him? I said one of you guys. I didn't say you. Wow. Raise as much.

Yes. Correct. Yes. Ebony will be every day on this show. It's the most consistent thing we do. But why can't I raise him? That's a good point. Because I want him to have good credit

when he gets older. Wow. So you think I don't have good credit? You know that's the joke that me and you have. No it's not.

Let's pull off Brandon and Mr. Barstool. Can we find this Brandon and Mr. Barstool? He's been doing that since long before

Brandon. I'm hoping maybe he'll make me feel better about myself. Sass, it's the spot. It's the spot. It's the worst picture I've ever taken. It is the worst picture.

Well, Owen took the picture, and at first I was like, I feel like I was making a weird face in that, and then I was like, perfect. And then we just wasn't going to take multiple. I don't even like looking at myself right now. I feel very insecure with my appearance. Always or just after that? Just after today

because I didn't shower. I feel like he's staring at me like this is hard. Do you have a box cutter right now on me? Yeah. Bertrand, in the last couple months.

Wait, wait, wait. Bertrand. Who the fuck is Bertrand? That's not my last name. Beltrand. That's not my last name, stupid. What is it? Beltrand.

Beltrand. Yes, who the fuck is Bertrand? I don't know who the fuck that person is. I had no idea what your last name was. I've never known your last name. How do you claim that you love me and all this shit? You don't even know my last name. I didn't know your last name.

All you had to do was ask. Ebony, my last name? Actually, never mind. Don't answer. I never said I loved you. I did. Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck.

Yeah, I don't know your last name. It's okay. But it's too many of you motherfuckers, and y'all all look alike. So I don't know who the fuck. I don't know when people are like they knew or they've been here for a long time. I don't know nobody's name. You know that. I know.

You know that, Owen. I only know half the last names in this room. You think everyone should be named Terry, like six of your siblings. Oh, you tried it. Your dad's named Terry, and you have at least one name named Terry. You just love talking about Terry. And what's your middle name? Oh, fuck you. I mean, it's... Your middle name's Terry. My middle name's Terry. What's your middle name? Oh, fuck you.

Your middle name's Terry. My middle name's Terry. What's your middle name? Terry with an I. Terry with an I. I'm not even kidding. How many of your relatives are named Terry? I'm the only girl.

Six boys. Six boys named Terry? They're all named Terry? Yeah. Like Terry Jr., Terry III. I think, like I said i think six i think i think six men yeah so they all go by terry terry jr yeah they all go by terry jr if somebody was to yell out terry we all look back like it's so fucked up so wait so your dad is terry and he has

six terry yeah he has five terrys that makes them all terry jr yeah so yeah so they're so i think that they're because he has nine baby And go by TJ like yes I feel like a lot Of his baby mothers thought that he was Like their son was the only TJ and so we All was like at a family reunion like Terry like which one we all turned Around like what the fuck I am so white

That the the idea of multiple women Didn't cross my mind for a second I just Thought your dad that Six, though. Yeah. Six Terrys. There's some dumb bitches, though. My father's slaying dick dick. Like he be out there. Like a Beyblade. Who's your best favorite? His pull-out game non-existent.

He don't believe in that shit. What do you mean he doesn't believe in it? He don't believe in it. He leaves it in. He leaves it in that shit. I respect that. He soaks. He bakes that shit now. Yeah, he bakes that shit. But like, he He soaks. He bakes that shit now. Yeah, he bakes that shit. But his count's got to be really high, his sperm count. He's never had a Mountain Dew. He doesn't know how to ride a bike either, does he?

He doesn't even drink soda. Oh, yeah. Okay. So I'm pretty sure he could ride a bike. I know he can't swim, though. I didn't know that. Code Red. Does it?

Yeah. Just Code Red or Mountain Dew? I think it's Code Red. it's some ingredient in it. That's in Sour Patch Gum, too. I don't really know some shit like that. Like, hey, try drinking. Right. You'd be a freak.

I was going to get a Code Red this morning. You were very panicked there. You have enough kids. No, I'm good. I don't drink Mountain Dew, though. I never knew that Mountain Dew killed your sperm. I believe it does. It's sweet tea as well.

Popeye's sweet tea. That's not true at all does. It's sweet tea as well. Popeye's sweet tea. That's not true at all. That's not even close to true. Popeye's. Sweet tea actually absorbs your sperm. Brandon, you were debating on whether or not you could win mayor of Starkville, Mississippi. You asked us for a percentage. I said 25.

Yes, I think that's disgustingly low. You think you would win. So it would be around 70? He said in three years if he runs. In three years, the next Starkville-Mayor relationship. And you said you think you are a household name in Starkville, Mississippi. I'm absolutely a household name in Starkville, Mississippi.

How big is the town? Do you remember when we were walking? TJ, can we call a random Starkville number? No way. When you say household, that means that everyone knows you. Guys, I have a household name in Starkville. Do you remember when we were walking in the city and a guy walked by you and said, Nice Mississippi State shirt?

And you were furious he didn't recognize you. Brandon, do you think more people know Barstool or you? It did happen like that. It didn't happen like that. It didn't happen like that. Your point remains. Brandon, Barstool is not even a household name. This ain't got nothing to do with Barstool. It does.

It has everything to do with Barstool. It has nothing to do with Barstool. You transcend Barstool. 25,000 people know who you are in Starkville, Mississippi? Yes. All 25,000. Zuck, can we just call a random Starkville or Mississippi area? I'm going to call from the office.

Yeah, just call a restaurant. Call a restaurant. Oh, yeah. Give me the area code. Yeah, we'll call a pizza place. Yeah, we'll call a pizza place in Starkville. 662-323-7. And be like, we have an order for Brandon Walker,

and then we'll wait and see their reaction. That's not, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. And then we'll be like, do you know Brandon Walker? Just say that. Do you know Brandon Walker? Call a hotel and make a reservation for Brandon Walker. No, no, no. And then we'll be like, do you know Brandon Walker? Just say that. Call a hotel and make a reservation for Brandon. That's worse. Call a hotel and what do you think the receptionist will be like? Oh, the Brandon Walker is coming to my hotel?

I'm telling you, I'm a household name in Starkville, Mississippi. Define household name. It ain't got nothing to do with Barstool. I was already. Yes, a lot of people there know you, but not more than 50%. More than 50% of people in Starville know you. Absolutely not.

No way, Brandy. That's not a... Don't understand that it's a college town. It's not about you. It's a college town. What about people over 60? It's a college town.

People over 60. I don't even know if I want to. I'm not even a household name on the street I grew up in. Not even close. We're not. Should you call the town hall? I got the number right here. Azal, what do you have? I We're not. Should you call the town hall? I got the number right here.

Azal, what do you have? I'm definitely not. I'm definitely not. Brandon, this is political research we're about to do. I can win mayor of Starville in three years. I move back there, buy a house next year. I can win in three years. Brandon.

You're digging yourself. Who are we calling? This is going to look real bad. Guys, Uron Starville is a tiny town. No, it's not. This is a big moment for Brazilians. My town is like 15,000 people. Hello?

I know me. Hello? Hello? They hung up. That certainly sounded like it didn't. They heard five people talking and hung up. You got to be quiet. You got to tell us.

Be quiet. Let's do it again. Let's do ASMR. Talk for a little bit. Hello? Test, test. You gotta tell us when we're through. Or calling, or what we're calling.

What are we doing? We're gonna just see if they know you. Any given person, a random person. And we'll give you a couple tries. We'll give you a couple tries. Best of five. Hello? Hello?

Hello? Alright, so that's Brandon Walker, if that helps. We're with Brandon. We have to wait until they answer to put them on? Yeah. Understand. What are we calling? Say it's Nick with Barstool Sports.

No, no, no. They probably don't want to tell us what we're calling because then everyone's going to call. This is the office to elect Brandon Walker from there. We're just gauging interest in the candidate. Yeah, yeah. Pizza place didn't answer. Pizza place didn't answer? They're probably busy. I'm going to text you a number for town hall.

Not town hall. Maybe we should see if they know Ben Mintz to make this little competition. Yeah, we're here with Ben Mintz. Oh, really? And Brandon Walker. If this backfires and they're like, yeah, I love Brandon.

I don't know what to do. It's a bad look. I just don't know what the fuck to do. But you don't look too confident. No, you don't look confident at all. So my threshold is being known by 51% of people. It's ringing. Yeah. Yes.

Thanks for calling. Hi, I'm calling with the office to elect Brandon Walker just to gauge some political interests. Have you ever heard of Brandon Walker? No, I haven't. Right now, I'm on the job. Oh, my God. I'm so sorry. I thought this was a home phone. I'm sorry. No, sir haven't. Right now, I'm on the job. Oh, my God. I'm so sorry. I thought this was a home phone. I'm sorry.

No, sir. Thank you. Thank you. Viva. Viva. Viva. Viva. They didn't know you in a pizza hut.

That's your target demo. Wow. How many times have you been to that exact restaurant? Call a local restaurant, not one that's just – call a homegrown. No, I have not. Okay. Yeah, let's call a homegrown. But that's not household.

What about Nuke's Eatery? You ever been to Nuke's? No, that's a chain. Bulldog Burger? That one would work. All right, we'll call Bulldog Burger. Oh, you got this one? I can.

Can you guys hear that Yeah Does anybody sound like that It's a beautiful accent. It's a beautiful accent. It's a beautiful fucking accent. Fuck you. She sounds gross. Thank you for choosing Bulldog Burger in Starkville. How can I help you? Hi, I'm calling with the office of Brandon Walker to gauge political interest.

May I ask you one question before I order pizza? It's a hamburger place Oh, we don't serve pizza Do you serve cheeseburgers? We serve burgers, yeah Okay My first question is Do you know who Brandon Walker is?

Brandon Walker? Yeah, a public figure from Mississippi No, I don't You don't, okay Okay Alright, be well I'm sorry. You don't. Okay. Okay. All right. Be well. I'm sorry.

Wow. They don't know you? All for two. At Bulldog Burger? At Bulldog Burger, Brandon. Oh, my goodness. Oh, no. We'll do one more. We can do one more.

We'll do one more. At your request. We'll do dealer's choice. Yeah. You can pick the establishment, Brandon. Let's call the airport you worked at. I can pick the establishment? Yes.

Call the jail. Call Maroon and Company. What's Maroon and Company? That's not a household name. No. Okay, no, no, no. You said my request. He's scratching and clawing.

Let's just call a random call. You just said. I vote yes. Yeah, let him do it. This could be great if it goes poorly. If it's Brandon's recommended date, does a family member own it? Obviously, that's the case. Does a family member own it? No. A friend? No.

A friend where you just shopped a lot, is that it? It's a place I hosted a show once. Okay, that works. Oh my god, I hope they don't know it. I really hope they don't know it. Sass, you want to take this one? No. Nick, you got it.

All right, Ebony, you should take it. Don't do the whole Office of Brandon Walker. Just do it. Yeah, Brandon Walker's coming into town to host an event. What's it called? No, no, no, no. Halo. Hello.

Hey. Hi, I'm calling just to gauge public interest in political candidates. And if I say a name, Brandon Walker. Have you ever heard of him? Yes. Oh! Okay. And would you be interested in voting for him if he ran within the next five years?

For mayor. I don't know. You're not sure? Is there anything we could do to sway you? Well, I'm kind of at work right now. Oh, my God. I'm so sorry. Oh, my God.

I'm so sorry. All right. Well, thank you. No problem. Can we just get a yes or no if you would vote? Okay, sure. Sure? Yeah.

Have you ever voted before? I have not. Okay, thank you. Thank you. Have a great day. No problem. Bye. Well, that's how I vote.

That's a moral victory. Good shit, Brandon. That wasn't bad. You proved us wrong. So that's one person that would vote if they had ever voted before. I mean, we could get her registered. I got egg on my face. I feel bad for doubting you.

One for three? One for three. I mean, this is just a small sample size. We're not going to go any further. It's a small sample size. One out of three. I'd like to go a little further. It could turn into two out of four.

It could turn into three out of five. That's like to go a little further. It could turn into two out of four. It could turn into three out of five. That's 60% all of a sudden. So you think you have a more core audience amongst students? I would think that's... Well, no. Yes. Yes, for sure.

College. That one person's voice sounded like it was a recording. Thank you for choosing Bull Burger. It was at first. No, it wasn't. No, and then it was a press one. No, but then the. It was at first. No, it wasn't. No, and then it was a press one. No, but then the second one around sounded like... Also, technically...

Automated. There's no... We don't know that the woman that worked at Pizza Hut lives in Starkville. I'm not. No. She might come in from Westwood. I haven't been for 22 minutes of cooking pizza.

She might come in from Macon. We don't know. But you're not even... From Macon? She might come in from Macon. You think she'd come in from Macon? She might come in from Macon, Mississippi. To work in Starkville. It's 20 miles away. Do you know how many fast food places are in Macon? She might come in from Macon. You think she'd come in from Macon? She might come in from Macon, Mississippi. To work in Starkville.

It's 20 miles away. Do you know how many fast food places are in Macon? Two. They got a McDonald's and a Subway. That's it. Macon has like 100,000 people. Macon, Mississippi has 12,000 people. That's where Jeffrey Simmons is from.

Whatever. Can we call the School of Business at Mississippi State? They would have no reason to know me whatsoever. None? You don't know what to know me whatsoever. None? You don't know what a household name is. That's the issue. Let's call a house. Let's call a house.

Can't just call a random house. Yeah, we can. Yeah, I can. Like, what's the area code? I told you, 662- And what's the typical first? 323. 662-323?

All right. 662- 323. KB's going to do it. Don't say2-3-2-3. All right. 6-6-2. 3-2-3. KB's going to do it. Don't say the number out loud. 2-2-3. 3-2-3. 3-2-3.

And then make up a fake name that he's running against and see who they... Welcome to Verizon Wireless. Oh, they didn't pay their bill. That makes a lot of sense. This is turning into... There's my Mr. Barstool. Oh, they didn't pay their bill. That makes a lot of sense. This is turning into... There's my Mr. Barstool. Oh, God. That's not a good pic.

Look at that. It's the worst picture ever. You know when people still have their jack-o'-lanterns out on their porch like three months after Halloween? I hate to see it. I hate to see you, Brandon.

Yeah, it's okay. You gave him a four and a half? Yeah, but after that, I'm starting to rethink that shit. Why? Yeah, that's not a good picture at all. Oh, Lord. I think it's that spot. It has bad pictures.

You look like a grandpa that has no teeth. I had COVID. Of course you're going to use that. Yeah, COVID's not real. You didn't even know you had COVID. Facts. That's just a liberal construct. You do look significantly better now.

Yeah, you do look good. So that's good. Yeah. Sass, yours was yesterday. Yeah. I'm working on it. It's going to be a good weekend. I'm going to fix myself.

Hair cut. A lot of cardio. New shoes. New shoes. Oh, that's interesting. Dude, you do have that swollen, like... Yeah, I don't like looking at it, so I'll say it down. Radiation face.

I had to mute the... I saw it, and I had to click, I do not like this tweet. Hide this tweet from my timeline. Did you like it first? Oh, absolutely not. Good thing people won't respond to every single tweet you ever send out with that now. I don't care. Don't do that if you ever send out with that now. I don't care. Don't do that if you're listening.

Please do that. I have a question. Uh-huh. Do you think every mayoral candidate in Starfall is a household name? It would certainly help. Maybe not, but you claimed you were. I think I'm over 51%. I do.

I don't think. And it's not even like a knock on you. I just don't think any of us would ever reach that. I have a different, different, different for me. You're misacquainting how many people know about Barstool or any internet thing. I don't think my knowledge of me and Starfleet is affected by Barstool that much anyway. I had a Mississippi State podcast. I had a Mississippi State podcast. I had a Mississippi State media.

There are so many people who don't follow sports. They don't follow the internet. In Starkville? The average age in Starkville is 27.2 years old. That helps Brandon. That's a young town. So who do you think would actually be a household name? Do you think Dave's a household name anywhere?

In Starkville? Dak Prescott's a household name. Okay. That's not... I meant from Barstool. He's the starting quarterback of the Cowboys. From Barstool in Starkville? I meant from Barstool.

Probably Dave's the only one. And I don't know if Dave... Yeah, I guess no. You ever been to the Starkville Cafe? So just you and Dave? I have been to the Starkville Cafe. I'm going to call them quick. It's got the best breakfast in Starfield.

Really? Yeah. Delicious breakfast. So you've been there often. You're a notable patron. You got this one? Hi, this is Stacy from the Starfield Cafe. How may I help you?

Hey. Do you know Ben Mint? He's a public figure in Mississippi. Yeah. Oh, nice. Great. Great. Thank you. Do you know Brandon Walker. Oh, nice. Great. Great, thank you. Do you know Brandon Walker?

Oh, no. Oh. Thank you. All right. Thank you. We'll be there soon. Thank you. We'll be there soon.

Oh, wow. Who did you just call for that? That couldn't have gone worse. Oh, that's perfect. Oh, do we have a natural thought? What a dweeb. What a fuck. Oh, that was perfect.

Is there anyone on Mikey Podcast over there? Fucking clammy. Mikey Podcast, four years on the pirate ship. Yeah. As of midnight. He got hired at midnight, I guess. Fucking clammy. Mikey podcast, four years on the pirate ship. Yeah. Midnight. As of midnight. He got hired at midnight, I guess. Yeah, why'd he ask him?

He waited until the second he started. You know when girls ask what time you were born? Like, oh, what time did Barstool hire you? Yeah, what time was that? Who asked you for that? I just want to say thank you. That's for all of you. Listen, I've been here, you know, seven years.

Just thank you. Really. Brandon. Can you toss me thatey trolley. Listen, I've been here, you know, seven years. Just thank you. Really. Brandon. Can you toss me that energy? Yeah. Let me finish that. They're sending me. Wipe that out.

Oh, no. He's walking in here with authority. What brings you here? Papa's club. Viva. Viva. So we called a diner in Starkville. The Starkville Cafe.

And we asked if they knew who Brandon Walker was. You're grimacing. And they said no. They didn't know. They did not know. And we asked if they knew who Ben Mintz was. Immediately. Yeah.

It was an emphatic yes. It's very hard to know what to believe with y'all. That was true. What they just said was true. Rewind the tape. Really? So Brandon Walker said that he's a household name in starkville mississippi over 50 of its residents know who he is we told him no we tested that theory with phone calls to random establishments really we proved ourselves right he's one for five and the one was his what do you think you would be in a town like Oxford, Mississippi? Oh, man.

Household name? Yeah. Yeah. Well, now we've got to test it out. No, I think Oxford. But also, I will say, in Brandon's defense, like Oxford's smaller. That area's smaller. Oxford's like Oxford.

It's smarter, though. Yeah. Oh, yeah. I mean, start with the freaking farm pit of America. Oh, God damn. Cal Pasture Town. Oh, you can kill it that all you want. How far apart are they?

They're an hour, hour and a half. So you can still smell the pit from where you are. Yeah, but Oxford's got good restaurants, good live music, beautiful women, old time college charm. There's a lot of character. I don't know if people know what household name means. They don't. Timothy Chalamet just became a household name.

Probably still. Maybe not yet either. Yeah, like Jordan Peele isn't a household name. Probably still. Maybe not yet even. Yeah, like Jordan Peele isn't a household name. No, no. Mintz, if you had to guess, what percent of the Oxford population knows who you are? Okay, so the student body is like 15,000 to 18,000, and the whole town is like 40 total. So the school is the town. There's a lot of older retired people that retire there. Well, it's less than half the town. Yeah, older retired people probably don't know. So the school is the town. There's a lot of older, there's a lot of older retired people

that retire there. Well, it's less than half the town. Yeah, older retired people probably don't know because they're not still as... The average age is 28. I'll go, I'll go like

58%. 58%. But that's believable because that's like, Brandon said 100%. No, he said 50. Fuck. 58 is a lot.

Well, the thing is... Should we get Brandon back in? I think all the college students know... The older, retired crowd won't. You know, it's not... You think all of the college kids? Like, the... I...

You think every college kid? Not every. Every stretch. 50% definitely. No, every. But, like, Ole Miss is not that big of a school. And so, even people that aren't, like, Barstool, people are going to know. You think?

I don't know. State's a bigger school. I can't even get WVU Barstool to follow me back. And also, I've lived in Oxford more recently than Brandon's lived in Starkville, and I'm still, like, super close in the community. I don't know. Do you think you could win if you ran for mayor of Oxford? Do you think you could win?

It depends on the platform. Ooh, what's the alt-right? I don't know. I'm friends with the current mayor who's, uh, we're not gonna go politically. Nah. But, uh, I don't know about winning the mayor. No, I couldn't win the mayor. I mean, I graduated from Ole Miss in like

nine years of the 2.00, so it's gonna be tough to sell my intelligence there, to be truthful. But you just gotta believe in Christ. Hey, I do believe in Christ, though. There it is. Now that's right. Now that's the platform, motherfucker. Okay. Yeah, hey, do believe in christ there it is yeah that's right now that's the platform motherfucker okay yeah hey it works the south yeah i don't want to share one other thing that in brandon's defense so brandon and i had a crazy the governor of mississippi tate reeves

dm'd walker and me on sunday and he follows us both on twitter and he said hey i'm a huge fan of what y'all do at barstool representing representing the state. Y'all are both welcome to come by the governor's mansion and smoke a cigar with me anytime. And I was like, what? Are you going to do it? Hell yeah, I'm going to do it. What if I got divided? Where I started a year ago, I'm getting calls from the governor. What if he asked you to stay here? I was unemployed playing

online poker like 14 months ago. Damn right I'm going to stay in the governor's mansion. Would you steal something from the mansion? No. Maybe like a hand towel? Something small. You should I'm going to San Antonio. Would you steal something from the mansion? No. You got to. Maybe like a hand towel? Yeah. A towel. Something small. You should play poker in like North Korea.

I wanted to go to Vietnam for poker at some point. I would like to have a poker. The Asian Pacific. Ho Chi Minh? Yeah. Yeah, I think that they'd have a tough time understanding me at the table, I think. We should go to Macau. Currently, Owen, I don't think either one of our fiscal portfolios are quite

ready to go gamble right now is that the is that the guy that invited you looks like both of you that is a composite of both of your faces that's the most mississippi both of you guys goodbye mil went to private school in mill. He's not an Ole Miss or State guy. He's neutral. Went to private school. Oh, there we go. There we go. 2024, baby. Can't wait. No, that's awesome.

Yeah, but. Is he cis, the governor? Is he what? Cis? Cis white male. Cis gender? He's probably cis, right? I don't know what that means. All right, we'll move on from it.

I know he's like an ec. He's a big economy guy, like banker type. Interesting. Yeah, so. Cool so he's into that. Can we get Brandon back in? Yeah, yeah. Swap him out. I'll go get him.

Thank y'all for having me. Have a good Friday, boys. You're looking healthy, man. Thank you. Yeah, we've been running. Oh, we've been running. Yeah. You look young with that hair.

Getting rid of the long hair. I've been running lately, so we're trying to get back on the right track, boys. Good shit. Drag out what little youth I've left. Hell yeah. Of course. Thanks for coming by my show. That's fucking hilarious.

All right, yeah, we got to break to Brandon that we just called somebody we knew for that. No, no, no. I think we should call other places and see if they know Mince. I think we should. 58% They're both so wrong. They're both very delusionally wrong. I didn't want to see if they know Mince. I think we should. 58% They're both so wrong.

They're both very delusionally wrong. I didn't want to do the calls with Mince in here because I feel bad. But Brandon, I take it. He thinks the whole... They don't have a grasp on the average person. I went to a New England school. Like a thousand people a grade. Dave and them had came to the school.

And like if you polled everyone, it would be low. Yeah. My hometown hometown I would guess there's a real bubble here there's nowhere that people have 100% the same interest no 5% what about you KB

what would you say for your hometown legitimately 7 that's like if I had to like estimate on my life What would you say for your hometown? Legitimately seven. That's if I had to estimate on my life. I'd say I'm probably 40% of my hometown. 40? No way. Mine, always leaving something.

Your knapsack. Yeah. That's right. I think mine has gone down since I started working here. Some of my friends stopped fucking with me. Why? That is true. I hell you got in your bag? I think mine has gone down since I started working here. Some of my friends stopped fucking with me. Why? That is true.

I've got a big ego. You did. You did. You got a real big head when you started here. So how about our boy, Nico, friend of the program. He's just hanging out with Kid Leroy and Tame Impala, who are like the Michael Jackson and Eminem of Australia and beyond.

The Michael Jackson of Australia? Like, Kid LAROI is probably one of the top artists in the world right now. Okay. And Tame Impala

for his niche genre is huge. You know these motherfuckers, Ebony? I'm fucking confused. Oh, jeez. How do you not know

Tame Impala? I'm always confused when I come in here and start talking about the shit they listen to. I don't know what the hell they're talking about. We're talking about our friend who's been on the show.

It's not all about you. It don't have to be about me. As soon as the cameras come on, you turn on this character. You were just listening to Harmony Hall by Vampire Weekend. She was listening to Coheed and Cambria. I don't even know who the hell that is.

Good eye sniper. I'll shoot you run. First of all, bitch, I don't know who the hell that is. I don't know who the hell that is.

First of all. And every time I come in here and y'all talk about some country shit or something, I'm lost. Kim LaRoy is a rapper. I don't know who the hell that is.

I'm so tired of this character. When we walked into work together, you were just like, did you hear Andrew WK married Kat Dennings? Zoom into my face. Does it look like that's some shit that I will fucking say? Absolutely not. Oh, he quit the show.

He quit. Did you quit? Mint says that he is 58% people know him there. So you want us to do some test runs on that? No, I don't. No.

It's fine. Humble. Why not? You don't want to see your enemies fail? I'm good. That's not my enemy. I sent him in here.

You didn't tell us that you got invited to smoke cigars at the governor's mansion. Well, Mint did. It was a big here. You didn't tell us that you got invited to smoke cigars at the governor's mansion. Well, Minstead... He said he got invited and he was like, can my friend Brandon come? The governor DM'd us the other day

and said to come by the mansion and smoke cigars in the man cave. So, whatever. The governor's man cave? The Mississippi governor man cave. What kind of fucked up stuff do you think happened there? Can you pull up the other one? Yeah, the other one is...

It's a better picture of him. That's my president, baby. Pat is sneaky alright. I'm very old. Well, I believe in truth and honor, and I don't believe in COVID. Kidding. You might get this fucking stream pulled if I said that. I believe in truth and honor and I don't believe in COVID kidding.

You might get this fucking stream pulled. If I said that, God damn liberal media, a little bit more to do. Yeah. Yeah. You take, I can tell you what to say. Oopsies.

Um, what else? What else is going on? When's our next live show? No idea. Do we have another one? There's a few. We got to figure some shit out.

Yeah. Coming up soon? I'm just moving pieces around. Bro, it's been a busy 48 hours. Yeah. Yeah, it really has. Ebony? I know what's coming back to me.

Do you want to go see Four years strong with me then uh next week i feel like i say this shit because we on the radio and then when we leave the radio it's like y'all all cat except for brandon y'all all cat and owen you see about to stick your middle finger up at me bitch oh that's a point of myself baby old cap he never yes you never invited me to your fucking comedy show i don't think you're funny as hell I don't think you're funny I need to see it I need to see it But I never did invite you To my comedy show

You never invited me So how's that cap That's cap First of all When you was over here While we was over here We was talking about your comedy You said you should come

Which was sold out I said You said can I come Am I not valid Like can I not walk in with you Like do you not feel safe No one can That's why you're not funny

They couldn't even walk in with me That's why I'll bring you to Nick and Kyle's next show I'll walk in with you like do you not feel safe no one can that's why you're not funny they couldn't even walk in with me that's why I'll bring you to Nick and Kyle's next show I'll walk you in okay not if I'm there we'll put you on the list

oh you about to start you about to start some shit I'll help you with your comedy shit that's right they'll be cutting ass for you forever would you open for shows

what I what would you open no she wasn't I just heard like three different things. Yes, I would open. You would do it. My legs, yeah.

You would do it. What? Give her that dick. Look at KB. He's feeling offended. He's like, oh, fuck. Even Owen gets a pass. What?

I like Tico. Okay. What were you calling her? What? Oh, you try to go there. Takashi six, five, two. You try to go there. You try to go there takashi six five two that's just funny it's just mad funny it's it's jordan hey what's going on nothing you have another wrestling interview out or do you not no but i have one in Tuesday. Oh, yeah, I got Tony Khan out, but I got another one coming in Tuesday. Stupid numbers.

The wrestling fan base. Oh, that's not. No, it's you, but they have a loyal fan base. We got a prep sheet. They do. Oh, we got a prep sheet. At 156. 156.

Well, that's just great, isn't it? All the printers are broken. That's just great timing. Anything of note? Who on the act is the worst parallel Parker? I don't know how. I'm not great at questions. I don't think I have ever.

I'm never great at questions. When was the last time you had to wear khakis? Had to? Or just did? My confirmation. Yesterday? Away. When do you have to wear khakis?

I wear khakis every day. Stephen Che was delivered a random Amazon packet. It's a hypothetical. This is funny. Called Amazon and said, leave it outside, but they'll come pick it up in two days. But if they don't pick it up, it's ours to open. Is it ethical to keep an open? If they tell you you can, yeah.

This is your prep sheet? Yeah. What the hell does that even... How do you even think of that? I don't think they would tell you that, though. This is our best one we've ever had. This is absurd. This is the show.

How well is your apartment furnished? Not well. Not well. Not well. You just have a beanbag chair. I've ever had. This is absurd. How well is your apartment furnished? Not well. You just have a beanbag chair. It's better that way. What do you mean you only have a beanbag chair in your apartment? I was talking to your friend Derek, our friend, and he said when he went over there, I've never been to your place.

Never invited us. He only got one beanbag chair. You warned him that there's cum on it. I did. You have one chair and then you cum on it and. You warned him that there's cum on it. I did. You have one chair and then you cum on it and invite people over? There's not a cum on it. It's a very large beanbag chair. It can fit like four bodies.

So you got a cum section. There's no cum on it. There is. There has to be. You just have a cum section of the thing? No. Oh. You had a few podcast mics on your coffee table in the Instagram when you moved in.

I did. But we've never recorded there. That's sick you have a coffee table, though. For sure. Yeah, that is kind of cool. Having podcast mics laying around is always cool. I have one in my room at home. Do you?

Never used it. Wait, do you have one of mine? I wasn't destined. The black one? I think I have two of yours, yeah. So both of them are just mine. Yes. Yeah.

All right. Did you guys see the guy at the Bucs game last night that got the ball? Oh, yeah. Yeah. All right. Did you guys see the guy at the Bucs game last night that got the ball? Oh, yeah. Yeah. Steven was very happy for him. He was really excited, too. Here you go, kid. This guy. Yeah, I'm happy for him.

I like the guy behind him. Yeah. Lifeless. The guy in the Aryan Brotherhood? No, no. He hasn't moved. He didn't. His face.

Everybody else is at least reacting slightly. This guy doesn't. He might be blind. Yeah, I like that guy. We're watching it again. Beautiful to watch in slow motion. Yeah. Thank you.

Nick, you'll be at my game tomorrow, right? I'm trying to get a group of people to go. But if you can't, will you come alone? Why do I feel like this is a trap? It's not a trap. Don't say ew. It's not a trap. I just want you there.

You said you would come to my game. He's telling his teammates you're his boyfriend. Yes, absolutely. I haven't thought about that, but now that you mention it. I'll go to the Eagle Bar afterwards. You're going to go to the Eagle Bar? Maybe officially off the wagon. Off the wagon, yeah.

That's been publicized. But you said you're going to do it moderately, yeah. Good. Let's see what happens. I'm happy for you. Enjoy yourself. You're next, Owen. Oh, yeah.

Brandon, go ahead and say something. About what? What are you doing? Promote. You're traveling. We're going to Knoxville tomorrow. Yeah, the Barstool College football show. I'm taking my wife out for a birthday dinner tonight, and it's going to be lovely.

You said that was Wednesday. It was. Her birthday was Wednesday. Oh, you didn't get steaks. I cooked her dinner at home. What'd you cook her? Tonight, I'm taking her out to a nice dinner. You did tell was Wednesday. It was. Her birthday was Wednesday. Oh, you didn't get steaks. I cooked her dinner at home. What'd you cook her? Tonight I'm taking her out to a nice dinner. You did tell me that.

PB&J's. Her birthday's a week-long affair. No, but I couldn't get home until 8 o'clock. So we couldn't get a nice restaurant. So we're going out to a nice restaurant tonight. Oh, we saw your sister last night. Oh, yeah. She was at the Philadelphia show.

Yeah. She works hard. She's doing well. She does. Good for her. She had to shield all the girls off of me. Did she do a good job? Oh, yeah, she was at the Philadelphia show. Yeah. She works hard. She's doing well. She does. Good for her. She had to shield all the girls off of me. Did she do a good job? Oh, yeah.

Oh, she was in charge of tickets, and they oversold by like 100 people, and she kept it all under control. She had to beat the shit out of bitches? Mm-hmm. Good. That's what I told her to do. That's what you got to do. Good. There's a video of me playing video games Against Tommy Walker On game time

And I fucking smacked him Did you smack him? Really? What was it? It was like a fighting game Nickelodeon fighting game My first time I've ever played Tommy was trying to show me the controllers I just swept him

Killed him? Yeah Did that make you feel good? Yeah, real good I'm gonna buy a PlayStation today Yeah? Yeah Really?

PS5? No I got that Did you get money? No From something? From anything? Not even close enough to buy a PlayStation.

Maybe a controller. Buy one piece at a time. No, yeah, I need to get a new PlayStation, so I'm going to do it today. Also, if anyone has a free one that they don't use anymore and wants to give it to me. What game station? I want you for a PS5. Let's just get this show sponsored by PS5. Let's get that in the works. I think that's the only way to get one.

PS5s are like you can't buy one right now, I don't think. You haven't been able to buy one for a year. They've been sold out for months. This doesn't make sense. I don't know why I have a product. Just make more. I don't understand at all. Alright, everybody have a good weekend.

Subscribe to the NS YouTube. There's going to be a new episode later today. Oh, cool. I don't want to force anybody's hand. No, I actually do that. Yeah. No. We post more new shit.

Yeah, we're doing new videos. Yes. So, new sketches. Sketches. Fuck yeah. All right. All right. It's the act It's the act It's the act

It's the act Thank you.