The Yak - Big Cat Has a Real Shot of Coaching at the Olympics | The Yak 10-25-23

Episode Date: October 25, 2023

Shunned.You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak

Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Yo, DJ, pull that up. Whoa. Hello. Hey, yo. Yak, roback.com, promo code yak, 20% off your first purchase. Q-Zips, pull. Get that cup out of there. A hoodie like this?

Sorry. Q-Zips, polos, hoodies, this motherfucker. I'm sick of his shit. The second he gets his confidence, you realize this guy's a dick. I'm his old Mook when he was lingering around the studio. Should I be on today?

Should I come in? Mook is rattled by these lights. These lights are fucking with me. He didn't put his sunscreen on. Roback.com, promo code YAK, 20% off your first purchase. Roback.com, promo code YAK, 20% off your first purchase. Q-Zips, promo code YAK, 20% off your first purchase. Q-Zips, polos, hoodies, shorts, and Q-Zips.

Roback.com, promo code YAK. Check, check, check. Kyle just pooped. You got stranded. Kyle just pooped. Kyle just pooped. Breaking news. Yeah, I shit a lot, often.

But you don't eat. I'm eating. What are you pooping? I'm stacking 1, often. But you don't eat. I'm eating. What are you pooping? I'm stacking 1,600 calories in a three-hour window. Of course I'm going to shit at this time. Kyle just texted the whole group saying, I'm stuck in the bathroom with no toilet paper. That's crazy that, like...

Or, nor paper towels. How did you know there was no paper towels? Also, why are you being made fun of and not the maintenance committee? It's crazy that you text a group chat. Yeah, why would you text a group? Hold on. How did you text?

Better chance. How did you text from the toilet and know that there were no paper towels? Because I waddled out. That's what I wanted to hear. Poopy pants. God. You definitely. Yeah.

Oh, no. So what was the solution? Connor Griffin was in. See, that's why I texted the group. Pants Kyle You definitely Yeah Oh no So what was the solution? Connor Griffin was See that's why I texted the group Someone like I never would have thought To text him individually Right

You could have texted Any one of us 20 seconds Shout out CG Yeah big shout out CG You guys would have pranked me You guys The comedy guys

You would have pranked me You needed a normie To come give you toilet paper Dude that's the best reason to have an unfunny homie he won't fuck with me yeah no i told the paper i definitely if connor had if cg hadn't responded right away i definitely would have found a way to explode in toilet paper you would have done exactly i would have i've done that to a few people here exploding toilet paper so put put the roll of toilet paper in the middle of the Yaks studio and make him waddle. Yeah.

Yeah, you made the right move. Yeah. I think I did. I think I was perfect. Good wipe? Yeah. Wait, so were you pants down at the ankles waddling out? No.

We didn't have his dick out. They weren't all the way up, but yeah. But did you keep your cheeks apart so you didn't rub? No. If someone had walked in would they have been like oh Kyle is just walking like he's got an injury or they've been like oh he's got poop in his pants. They would have known exactly what was going on. When is your three hour food window?

5 to 8. PM. Yeah. So this is exactly when you ship 5 to 8 PM food out. That makes sense. I think so yeah. That's great. And you do when you ship 5 to 8 p.m. food out. That makes sense. I think so, yeah. It's great. And you do 1,600 calories from 5 to 8. Just a new thing.

I'm fasting for 18 to 24 hours and then doing a calorie deficit. Do you think these body experiments will ever harm you? No. I think I'm the healthiest and most fit I've ever been. Okay. I love this shit. Which is true. It is true in this room. harm you i don't know i think i i'm the healthiest and most fit i've ever been okay yeah i think i love this shit what's just true it is true in this room i love this yeah yes do you think you'll ever settle down into a routine or you're just gonna keep like switching them up i settle into routines for like two weeks that's not a phase but that's what I love. I love switching shit up.

I don't want to do that. Your routine is doing something drastically different every two weeks. You're a creature of habit. I'm depressed about it. Tommy? I forgot how to get comfortable in these. I see you too often.

You gotta take the pillow out. You're swiveling a lot. Yeah, I think you gotta take the pillow out. Did you guys see that Max video last night? I watched the entire thing live. It's maybe the funniest outburst anyone's had on the live stream. It's the funniest a person has ever looked. He also, people are starting to catch on that he is early stage Fleming.

Oh, my God. His hands. Yes. He was like on PMT he was like punching his hands and people were like this is early onset Fleming. Any biting yet? No biting. I look ridiculous! Wait, start it again.

I look ridiculous! I think you're doing a trust thing. Yes! I mean... It's not fucking working! It's Frank. Everything you tell me to do doesn't work! We had CJ in the background.

Just every inning, we're like, you gotta do this, you gotta do this, get a rally. Change your shorts, change this. And we ended up going tarps off and Jake Marsh, like Jake Marsh, the most Jake Marsh. The essence of Jake Marsh. If you ever like, hey, who's Jake Marsh? If you pull up that picture of us with the tarps off, it'd be like, that's Jake Marsh. Yeah. No one has ever looked more uncomfortable in a group of dudes with their shirts off than Jake Marsh. He's actively escaping in that picture.

Yeah, he's somehow walking away while sitting down on the couch. Yeah, he's like a statue, but he's running. Yeah, look at him. He's top left. Couldn't find him. That's how I look at strip clubs, I think. What a pose. Donnie looks fucking awesome.

Donnie looks sick. Donnie's never been uncomfortable ever. No. No. No, that's a fact. Is that his Susie? Is that what he calls us? Yeah.

You look ridiculous. He did. He looked pathetic when is he ever going to catch on that you're like you weren't trying to help him by changing his look were you kind of i did have a future on the field so kind of but yeah i mean his sadness is awesome it is someone did you see the someone did a uh mashup of him in the breakup. Great editing. I don't know who edited this. Probably Will Sparks.

It probably was Will Sparks. Will Sparks. Do you know Will Sparks, Tommy? The name sounds familiar. He's a graphics guy, right? Yeah, Will Sparks. Yeah, I've heard good things. I've heard he could be goaded.

Sneaky goaded. Not sneaky. He outed himself as goaded. Find the breakup one. I think they just tweeted, or I tweeted it, TJ. Or don't. All right. I should have told you before.

I don't like that. What? Just looking at the TV. Are our chairs too low? Can we put a tarp over the TV? Do we need to see the TV? What do you want? I just don't know how I... I don't want to be

excited anymore. I just... I don't know how we got here. I just don't know where to go. My relationship I've gone above and beyond for you, for us. Like you're on the verge you're just so close to being on the verge of happiness.

And then it just strangles you. Exactly. But nothing I can do can get me there. Where's Frank? Nothing. It's just the same. It's just all too familiar. Is it early on set plumbing? Yeah. It's just all too familiar

You know cartoons when a character is so hungry like a person will turn into like a cheeseburger in front of them Yeah, that's what's happening to like his shirts right now. I Do feel for him having all of your teams be really, really, really, really fucking good at the same time must suck. It must just be misery to have playoff runs. For what? This has been like a two-year window? If this was like a 20-year window, that's one thing. It's a tease, though.

It's a big tease. It's a two-year window. I would rather my team be dog shit with zero hope. Yeah. I enjoy being just a regular run-of-the-mill loser no i just wake up and i know i'm with you i'm with you it's been two years if this was like his entire life no i know but it's it's been two it's been a two year run the eagles did win five years ago yeah that's what i'm saying i understand but it's it's

been a crazy 12 month 12 months but the great but that's what i'm saying is the craziness is that all of his teams are really, really fucking good in every sport. Like, the second the Phillies lose, you can pivot and go, oh, the Eagles are going to win the Super Bowl this year. But they aren't.

The second the Eagles lose, you're like, the Sixers are third in the East. No, but they aren't. The Sixers are not going to win anything. But that's better than how many cities have... Yeah, so this idea

that Philly is tortured is insane. No, it's better than being Cleveland. Temporarily tortured. You want to tie... How much leeway do you get after a championship? It's better than being Cleveland. Temporarily tortured. How much leeway do you get after a championship? It's five years. Is it five years?

Yeah. So it's up. It's more torture to get teased like that than it is to be average. I enjoy being a regular loser. Apathy when it comes to your teams is a horrible feeling. Yeah, it is. You don't get excited about anything. Yeah, think about the cumulative joy of the regular season compared to right like what is it one week of smiled misery yeah but it's also like the phillies lost the fucking eagles lost in the super bowl the

sixers have been disappointed like it's just like the past but what i'm saying is that's literally what you just described is every single city basically every single city in this country watches all of their teams not win the championship every year. Every year. But not four consecutive seasons have teams blow leads like Philly has

this last one. In like heartbreaking fashion. They have. I would one million percent rather the Cubs made the playoffs and lost in seven games at home in the NLCS than shit down their leg to close out the regular season. Agreed. But if you had four consecutive teams lose like they've lost, I would definitely be a very bummed out person.

It sucks. Yeah. But I get what you're saying. Those last two Philly losses outweigh all the positive from the regular season. Like those last two home losses. At the bank. And I think that for baseball especially because people don't really care too much about regular season wins. No.

Right. Yeah. No. Football, you could argue last Eagle season was more net positive than negative. I think for sure. Yeah. Up 10 and a half. Yeah, but they were so good all year.

Yeah. They're just wallop teams. Jalen Hurts. Losing a Super Bowl feels so bad. You're right, Titus, so good all year. Yeah. They're just wallop teams. Jalen Hurts. Losing a Super Bowl feels so bad. You're right, Titus, in the big picture, but you have to win one. But they won not that long ago. I know, but it's... If Philly hadn't won a title since, like, the 70s, I would understand.

This would be agony, but I just don't like the woe-is-me shit when the city is... Oh, I think the woe-is-me is... We need everything. I think the woe-is-me is allowed within a week of the loss. Yeah. That was Max. I mean, poor Max. It just works out every single time they lose game seven.

It's like, well, we got to go record and unveil the new studio. He has it extra bad. Yeah. Because he's just front and center. Do the PMT fans like him more when they win or lose? Lose. Well, he wouldn't know. Well, no, because they don't like him when he's on the path of winning.

But they can relish in the fact that it will crumble. I mean, it's human nature. I think, actually, if you wanted to describe part of my take perfectly, it's like people like to watch their friends root for their teams but then ultimately lose. You don't want your friends to win championships. That's terrible. I love when...

This World Series is the best. I don't know anyone who's a Rangers or Diamondbacks fan. It's like it never even happened. I would root for Kyle if the Jets were in the Super Bowl. I would root for you. Would you guys want the Bucs to win another Super Bowl?

No. It depends on the person. So Che, no. I want them to not be a team anymore. Right. Right. It's messed up. I root for my friends' teams.

I hope they do well. Exactly. We had a very funny moment this morning because I was sitting in my office upstairs and it's completely barren because we just moved in here. And Jerry came in. He's like, this office fucking stinks. And he's like, this is the worst. And then Jay walked by,

not 90 seconds later, he goes, this office is incredible. He's like, you have a TV? What stinks about this? It's just nothing. No, no, my actual office. There's nothing in there. And yeah, Stephen was like,

this is incredible. You have a TV. And there's literally nothing in there. You should keep it This is incredible You have a TV And there's literally Nothing in there You should keep it that way Completely barren Completely barren Like a mafia boss

Ready to leave at any moment Yeah Yeah I have a one I'm banning White Sox Dave From I'm shunning White Sox Dave For one year

A full year Yeah Yeah I will From what From me Like you're not gonna talk to him Hang out with him One year shun starts today.

Why? This is well-deserved. Can't say. Well-deserved. What happened? He's here right now? I just walked by him. He's here now?

Yeah. Wait, why'd you shun him? I don't want you to shun him. One-year shun. Would White Sox Dave know why he shunned? Yes. Okay. Oh, God.

I would also say well-deserved. I know the story. One-year shun starts today. If you guys are riding with me, you start shunning. Hell, you could do two. I'll always shun him. Damn it. I might have to shun him.

I mean, the Yak, we got to stand with our guy. The Yak has to shun him, right? What if you caught me talking to White Sox Dave off hours? I guess you're off the Yak. No, you have a longer leash than everybody else. Okay. I'm just thinking of cl clandestine meetings me and dave in a park just to be like if i catch you doing that how do you think the white socks are

gonna do this year you know what you can do it you can do it off office premises okay yeah i'm doing like drops with him you're wearing a trench coat with your collar transmissions on your sunday's paper and it's just me being like hey dude like what are you getting for lunch okay shun's on shun's on um if you want to ask him if it's worth shunning i won't speak to him i'll let you guys do that okay okay okay bring him in yeah i won't you won't we will is he here right now, Steven? I just walked by him.

I tried to dap him up. He had something insane. He gave me a three-finger dap. It was terrible. Shun. Shun him, too. One-year, six-month shun. Can we go grab him?

Yeah, see if he's here. You can have him just talk into your mic. I'm not going to look. Wait, so I have two things I wanted to talk about. One is, what is this manifesto that the Michigan guy has? Michigan guy has a manifesto. Apparently he has a 500 to 600 page document detailing his plans for the future of the Michigan football program.

500 to 600 pages? So he is crazy. Has a sane person ever written a manifesto? Has a manifesto ever resulted in something good? This is the guy who did the actual spying. He's the guy that Michigan cheated with. Yeah, Karl Marx.

What about Manifest Destiny that gave us Sea to Shining Sea? That's good. No, that's bad. Now we killed a lot of people. Huge difference. They were going to die eventually anyway. Oh, okay.

So it's the Native Americans' fault. They were... I just said they. They should have been standing there. Anybody who was alive in the 1600s and 1700s was going to die anyway. Why? Because that's how life works. Okay.

I'm not hip to that era. What happened? Well, we took over the... I think we said it was our destiny to have this land, and so we kind of went and took it. We R'd and P'd. Yeah, R'd and P'd. Yep. Yeah.

Oh, Dave. Hello, Yeah. Oh, Dave. Hello, everybody. Oh, Nick just took off his headphones. You're being shunned, Dave. That's fine. Nick showed up to our meeting 15 minutes late. I don't think that's... No, take yourself a bigger hole, William.

I got you. I got you. I got you. Are you unshunning, Dave? Yeah. From what I understand, he did show up a tad bit late. A tad bit late, yeah. Not 15 minutes late.

I was hot in the Uber. Who are you talking to right now, Nick? I'm talking into the ether. I'll tell you guys what happened this morning. I got a text last night from a redacted person. Okay. I could have said another word that started with those two letters. Yeah.

Yeah. Yep. Can you help me write something? Meet at the office at 9. Yep. I get in the Uber, hit traffic. I get here at 9.08. While I'm in the Uber, he says, get here. I have a limited time. I figured a limited time would be 40 minutes. I get here at 9.08.

I call him, say, where are you? He's like, oh, I only had five minutes. No, I'm just walking around the office with my fucking dick in my hands. And he's like, I'm sorry. I got to go back. I appreciate you, though. And he just hung up. You wanted it to be a five-minute writing session.

What an insult. At 9.12 a.m., he texted me, where are you? He said, what time do you have to leave? I'm one minute away. At that time, I was on the phone with John Kelly saying I had to get up to Loyola to go interview Sister Jean an hour earlier. So that hour that I thought I had with Nick

vanished as I was on the phone with John Kelly as he was pulling up. So I apologized to Nick, which was a douche move because I didn't want to leave him hanging. Sean reduced. Sean reduced. Sean reduced to six months? Three months.

Come on. Give me two days, and I'll see you on Saturday. Deal. Deal. All right. All right. That was easy. God is good.

Hey, Nick, can you write 45 jokes in five minutes? Yeah. That's all I need. You know, give or take a few. Okay, so you guys are back. Yeah, we're back. Okay, well, until Saturday. So you did the interview?

Yeah, it actually went very well. She's a sweetheart. You had him meet at 9 a.m. to write questions or jokes for your Sister Jean interview that was happening this morning. Well, we had talked about it throughout the course, and he had given me a blueprint. It's not like, oh, yo, meet me there. We had discussed it. I had ideas already. There was discussions previously had.

Did you use the opposite of her name joke? I did not because it was a lot more buttoned up than I had hoped for. Damn. What did you think it was going to be? A loose interview with Sister J. Did you wheel her? I had hoped for. Damn. What did you think it was going to be? A loose interview with Sister Jean. Did you wheel her? I did wheel her, yes. I love it.

I wheeled her. You did 94 feet with Sister Jean. And her, she's got like a little bum leg, and it kept coming, and it would get caught under the wheelchair. You got her fucking bum leg caught? I can't miss out on this. Shun. No shun.

No shun. So I know. He went like this, too. He went got your fucking bum leg caught? I can't miss out on this. No Sean. He went like this too. He went a little bum leg. Have you guys seen Scary Movies? It was like that, but with the leg. So it kept on getting caught under the wheel?

Did you stop it? I honestly don't even think she knows it happened. It went well, though. Yeah, it sounds exciting. Couldn't have gone better. Where can you see that interview? You can see that. Well, we've got to finish it up tomorrow with some players,

but it'll be, I don't know. Barstool Invitational, November 8th. It'll be published in the next few days, weeks. I'll tweet it. I'll just tweet it out. Buy tickets to the Invitational. No, we have some great stuff coming. Dave did Sister Jean, 94 Feet.

Rico went to Arizona State. He did an anger management video with Bobby Hurley, which will be great. So, yeah, Parcel Invitational. Thank you for doing that, Dave. Yeah, of course. It's great. I'm excited. Dave, I was never mad at you. I know you doing that, Dave. Yeah, of course. It's great. I'm excited. Dave, I was never mad at you.

I know you weren't, Nick. Well, you should have been. I was mad at the situation for you. Yeah, you didn't apologize. You were just like, I'm mad at the situation too. I didn't know what I was going to say. No, no. But the thing is, if that came from anybody else, I'd be like, what an asshole.

But with you, you have some sort of weird, sort of weird special place in my heart. He has a je ne sais quoi. What's up, Tommy? What's up, Tommy? Alright, well, thank you, Dave. You're the best. You're the best. Doing the little bum leg like this with the finger. He asked me to write jokes, but I guess

it was more buttoned up than he imagined. Full disclosure, I was supposed to be in on that interview. Oh, what happened? I just backed out last night. Oh, because you didn't want to see the bum leg? Yeah. Yeah, probably. Well, we, I don't know.

I had shit to do today. I didn't realize they were only going to interview her for 30 seconds. I thought Dave doing it by himself would be funnier. Oh, way funnier. It's way better. It's way better than having to eat it. I bet you that leg is real tangled up. I need just like an ISO cam on the leg.

Oh, my God. I mean, she's 104. Yeah, of course. Yeah. Yeah. Her legs don't work. But one is worse than the other? Oh, yeah.

That's a good point. She can dunk off her left leg. Wait, he said it kept getting stuck in the wheel? Yeah. He's like, well, we kept. And his exact quote was, but we kept on rolling. Right. Like, kept getting stuck in the wheel in a 30-second interview.

What does that mean? It's like getting a hair in your shopping cart and, like, the one wheel that's all sitting around. You're an off course. Oh, my God. White Sox Dave's the best. God damn. I can't believe I was going to shun him for a year. Yeah, that was. I mean, you couldn't do that. It would just be a punishment for yourself.

Yeah. I'm happy you're back. All right, so wait, the manifesto. Yeah, apparently. I think it's good that he did a manifesto and didn't, like, murder a bunch of people. Because usually that's how the. When was the manifesto written? I don't know.

I think he's had it. I think this guy grew up, all he ever cared about was Michigan football, and he has this path in his life, in his mind, that he's going to help Michigan football no matter what. So this was his path. This isn't a message to the haters that are coming out. He has a 500-page plan for the future of Michigan football and how he was going to affect it.

Like a thousand-year right kind of thing? And craft it and build it. And how he was going to affect it like a thousand year right and craft it and build it and so I'd love to see it but it exists I think we have four to five co-workers that would probably do the same for their team oh for their team yeah

we got people that would write a manifesto for a lot of reasons yeah you're right I do think that the like you think Harbaugh like, you think Harbaugh knew? Do I think Harbaugh knew? Yeah. Of course he knew. I don't. Well, he knew.

I don't. I know you want him to be the Bears coach. No, no, no, but I don't. He just – okay, so Harbaugh just looked over there and said, I wonder who that is standing next to the offensive and defensive coordinator. No, no, no, I know he was an assistant. No, no, no, don't get me wrong. This guy's crazy. Wrote a manifesto marine naval academy all this stuff i think that he probably

told all the michigan staff i am exceptional at decoding uh signs yeah i know how to do this better than anyone i was in the marines i was went to the naval academy i have a mind that no one else can understand and the whole time he was just cheating and he was like it was he basically was a guy who was just getting ahead at his own job okay so what if all the money that he spent to send people around the country what if we found out that has ties to michigan i think there's probably other people on michigan staff that knew then harbaugh knew no i think he specifically was like i'm never telling jim harbaugh it's's like Fitzgerald.

If it happened in your program at Northwestern, it's your job to know about it. I think he might. Think about it. It is a very natural thing for someone to be like, my destiny is to work for Michigan football. I have to figure out a way to do it and then to cheat on his own and write it off as good work. And that cheating just happened to coincide with Harbaugh's career tanking and him desperately needing to bounce back and get some big wins.

And then 33-3 over the next three years. He had a couple bad years, but he also had a couple good years at Michigan before that. He was 2-4 before they started cheating in 2020. Right, COVID year. But I'm saying before that, they had very good teams. And they lost to Ohio State and Michigan State every time they played them. Not every time. Most times. Every time Ohio State. Ohio State, yes every time they played them not every time most times

every time Ohio State yes Irvin Meyer owned them kind of good looking yeah his name's cool I just think it's a very natural thing like if you like everyone wants to impress their boss everyone wants to get ahead so we just that's a hell of a coincidence I don't think you end up on the field beside Harbaugh, beside those offensive defense coordinators without Harbaugh knowing not only why you're there, how you got there. Because he said that he is the, and Harbaugh just believed him. When you say Marine, like Kate says Marine, everyone's like, whoa.

I've never been impressed with Kate being a Marine. I've always been impressed with Kate being a Marine. I focus on using my experience to employ Marine Corps philosophies and tactics into the sport of football regarding strategies and staffing, recruiting, scouting, intel, planning, and more. Because he basically admitted it then. Yeah, and if you had a guy who walked in your office

like, I can decode signs better than anyone, I'm not going to tell you how I do it. Okay. Yeah, sign me up. If you're not going to tell me how, you're not going to be on the sidelines. If you're not going to tell me how you do it, you're not going to be on the sidelines. I would take them. Of course Harbaugh knew how.

If you got your dream job at Barstool and you became the number one blogger, but you were using AI, you wouldn't tell Dave you were using AI. Correct. You'd just be like, I'm the number one blogger. Correct. Who do you think knew more, Harbaugh or Joppa? Joppa. So what does this guy claim to be able to do he was he he claims

that he's able to decode the sign so college football is the dumbest sport they don't have the communication to the quarterback where in the nfl in even high school you can talk to your quarterback right until the play goes or a certain amount of time and be like here's the play college football they don't allow that so the guys on the sideline who are doing all the hand signals are holding up the boards they're calling in the play he basically is like i know how to decode what they're doing better than anyone i was in the naval academy i was a marine corps alan it turns out he was he was advanced scouting basically sending people to videotape sidelines and then figuring it out from that.

It's not decoding, yeah. Right. So he, I'm not saying the Conner Stallions didn't cheat. He 100% cheated. I'm saying I think he did it because he was just trying to get ahead himself. Okay. When he just happened to buy tickets at Tennessee, Alabama, and Oregon, he decided to do that?

Or it wasn't Harbaugh saying, hey, we might play Oregon in the playoff. Let's check them out. No, I'm telling you. Look, my theory is kind of crazy, but it kind of makes a lot of sense. I don't think it does. I think it makes perfect sense. A guy who's literally so obsessed with Michigan football, he wants to find any way to be on staff.

He says, I have the secret. I'm not going to tell you the secret, but I have the secret. Your biggest defense that he's crazy is a 500-page ad. Right. But if you don't tell me the secret, you're not getting on my sideline. That's how these coaches operate. No, I think they're like, oh, you have a secret. Cool.

No, absolutely not. Tim Harbaugh's not doing that. What are you talking about? He doesn't care how he found out. He 100% cares how he found out. No, because now he can say I didn't know. He literally could do the Joe paw. No, no chance, man.

Jim Harbaugh's too much of a, you know, and you know this, you know Harbaugh's a control freak. No, I don't think so. I think he's a pretty well-mannered guy. He is a control freak. I would love to have him as a coach. I think he's going to have to realize that Michigan was cheating and he wasn't. And he's got a sterling reputation.

He's got to leave and go to the Bears. He literally left San Francisco because they wouldn't give him full and total control over everything in the building. Grapes of Wrath is only 450 pages. As is Prayer for Ominia. I think you guys are afraid that my theory makes a lot of sense. Tommy's in on my theory. The manifesto changes. The AI blogger thing. Yeah, the AI blogger's a great

example. I think Tommy can put himself in that guy's shoes. Oh, better than anybody here. Yeah. The closest thing we have to a Marine. I'm close with all the staff. He wrote. He called him J-Harbs. He became close to CP and J-Harbs. Apparently referring to current linebackers and crispage in running backs and assistant special

teams coach. So it's through the sun. Yeah, no i i think there are other people that he probably told i think he specifically kept it from jim harvard there's actually a message board a tennessee fan said that he it's from last december being like i there's a guy hold on i'll find it for you i saw it yeah and what was the last part i don't know you do know because that's what that that helps my case so how do they stop this from other school like other schools probably probably doing this probably do it but they don't have the paper trail this guy has and they don't have and there's not the absolute stark difference of when we think it started and michigan's record like there you can't deny that when this guy got hired,

their record got good immediately. Yeah, no shit. Yeah, right. Because they had all the signs. Here's the message for you. Right. Right. Right.

Right. Right. We agree on all this. Right. We agree on all this except for the fact that Harbaugh didn't know. Wrong. Oh, do I have a story on that? One of my little brother's friends is a

scout for them they paid for him to travel to the ut vandy game had planned it before the loss obviously to try to steal our signs he's from nashville originally so he just went away anyway even after our loss since it was thanksgiving says he and others are never allowed to talk to harvard directly about it this is december 1st 2022 so he was doing free harbaugh not practices right he was going to like opponents games before they play free harbaugh if it happens in your program you're supposed to know about it pat fitzgerald just got fired free harbaugh pat fitzgerald just got fired for that reason why are you taking this bait brandon? It's not bait. You were taking it with me. You were going with me seconds ago. I'm trying to just...

This is obvious bait. It's obvious bait. Seconds ago, you were... There's no way that Dan actually believes Harbaugh. He had no idea. The guy is a... He cares about competition, doing things the right way, and that's why he'd be the perfect coach for the Chicago Bears.

What does khakis have to do with anything? Just things he cares about. He's a control freak. And what do you do with the control freak? You sneak around them, but you still want to please them. Yeah. When I was in middle school. All right.

I got Kate on my side. Don't take the bait, Brandon. I was failing math, and I would forge my signature. I was afraid of my parents, but they were pleased with the result. Oh, yeah. Remember when you were schooling? They had every other answer to the math in the back of the results. Oh, yeah. Remember when you were schooling, they had every other answer to the math in the back of the book?

Yeah. You'd write down the answer and then you'd scribble some guesswork and be like, I don't know how I got it. I just got it. Yeah. Goes great until you do inevitably get caught.

All right. I got Kate and Tommy. Yeah. The big three. Anyone else? Anyone else? The big three. Will it make you like me more?

Anyone else? Anyone else? Takers? Will it make you like me more? Anyone else? Anyone else? Takers? It's one of my strategies. Who is the most important person in any room and agree with everything they say? Yeah, it sounds like you're real counter stallions. Brandon, you want to do it? No, I'm not doing it.

Brandon, we have beef. We have beef. We all have beef with Brandon. Okay. So this is changing topics. The second thing we wanted to talk about. Are you enacting a shun? I might.

I have a vacancy for a shun. I would like to get to the bottom of this. Last night, Sass texted us. Oh, yeah. I knew. And Brandon showed me. Well, that's interesting. So Brandon never told me? I've told all of you.

So I'm the hardball of this group? Oh my god. Wow. It's the exact same situation. It's the exact same thing. You can't take this topic back to that topic. You can't take this topic back to that topic. I just put a bow on the whole thing. Wow, that was pretty brilliant.

I didn't even expect that to happen, but it just happened. I've told you. You guys should be aware of it. No, that was pretty brilliant. That was, I didn't even expect that to happen, but it just happened. I've told you, you guys should be aware of it. No, I have not. You specifically kept me unaware. TJ, did you know? Hiding this from the boys is a crime.

TJ, I didn't hide it from the boys. I do. I do. You're not standing up to me. The whole staff knew. Did you know? I didn't know. I'm not a hard-bother.

Say it, and if the chat knows, then the show knows. Okay, does the chat know? Well, he hasn't said it yet. So what happened last night? Regardless of whether he said it once in the past, he's still under fire. Okay.

Sass texted the group last night, and he sent a picture of a young man at a bar, right? So apparently Sass was at a bar, and he says, you guys won't believe who this is. I'm going to read sass's text exactly just so i can accurately represent what happened um well we we texted though there they are okay um all right sass first of all sass made it a big deal breaking news big news i didn't think it was that big of a deal and he goes picture of the young man this dude this dude just told me that he's brandon's tit guy sends photos of tits to brandon every day been doing it for years said brandon gets mad when he doesn't and i said his name uh his name is jeff um not what i expected him to say when i said when

he said do you know brandon walker and i said he hasn't sent one in weeks so i had a guy that was dming me uh bear titties every single day one pair of titties every day but thing is you you showed me the titties yeah they're well thought out he's he curates he's a very good titty guy nuanced titty he's a very good titty guy sometimes i would say too too fake he would send some naturals sometimes i would say too big he'd send some smaller ones like i was a titties guy. Maybe last year, I announced this, that I was starting a DM group where I would have a guy send me a recipe every day. He would send me titties every day.

A guy would send me a Michael Jordan fact of the day, and I put that on Twitter. He joined that group. When the group shut down, he stayed on as the titty guy. Okay, so if someone ever asked me, did you know Brandon Walker had a titty guy, I'd say, I don't know. Why don't y'all have a titty guy? I didn't know.

I didn't know you could have a titty guy. That's your job. I didn't know it was legal. Hey, I have a titty guy plug. I have a titty guy plug. Share the love. Let me help you out. It would be so easy for him to just add us to the group.

Right. You should have just done that. Added one of your friends to the group. I know what it was. You had the plug, and you liked showing us, but you liked sprinkling. I only probably saw six titties. Three women. You're a guy who dumps sack and doesn't offer anyone else.

No, no, no, no. I offer. Titus knew about it. TJ knew about it. Kate knew about it. You were doing titties in the bathroom without any of your friends. The chat knew about it. There's no secret about my titties guy.

No secret. Was Big Cat off that episode? I don't know where Big Cat was. Big Cat doesn't listen when I talk. I do listen when you talk. I want your titty guy. I want the titty guy. I'll add everybody to the titty group right now.

Okay. Yeah. Deal. Kate, do you want to be in the titty group? I have a ball guy. Oh, nice. By all means. I'll take her place.

I don't want to be in the titty group. It's better. It feels a little more authentic when you and I are sitting by each other and you're like, check this out. Okay. Yeah, I like that. That's enough titty for me. I'll take the tits for sure. You're in the titty group.

Kyle? No. You just said you wanted to. I don't want to stack something like that. It's dopamine. The ultimate dopamine stack. Big Cat, you're in the titty group? I'm out now.

So it's just my titty guy. But I want you to show. Of course. You're so selfish. Every once in a while, I want you to show me. Yeah. But I want it to be thought out like, oh, Nick would love these. Yeah.

But I'll be mad if you show them to everybody else. If I see titties that are specific to a person, I will say, these are kind of titties. Okay. The titties I like are big and perfect. Okay. Well, I got something for you. All right. All right.

All right. I like big and slightly imperfect. Kyle, what's your favorite titty go to your chat okay yeah one that you think is mine yeah okay okay i'm into geography remember that all right so let me find him and i'll try to find kyle And I'll tell you on a scale of one to ten how accurate that is. Okay. All right. Well, I would have remembered you talking about a titty guy.

You know I love tits. I do remember. You know I love tits. Yeah, text a pair of tits to everyone in the room. Make sure... Everybody gets a different pair of tits? Yeah, but like,

think it out a little bit. I want you to explain your reasoning. Yeah. But you know I love tits and I would have heard that. I wasn't here. Yeah. But you know I love tits and I would have heard that. I wasn't here. Yeah. You can't even whisper tits around Big Cat.

I just get rock hard right away. You know what? I do know that you love tits. I love tits. He drools when he sees a circle. I'm drooling right now thinking about the circle. Hearing that he potentially talked about this on Pick Central. Oh!

I thought I talked about it on the Yak. And he talked about it last week on Mostly Sports. Oh! I've talked about it before. All his shows not sharing titty, guys. Carbaugh didn't know. Carbaugh did not know. This is a perfect case.

What are you guys doing? I'm waiting for the three dots to pop up on my phone from Brandon This is a perfect case. What? Are you guys doing this? I'm trying to see. I'm waiting for the three dots to pop up on my phone from Brandon because I'm horny. I was doing for Kyle. I just want two dots for the record. Yeah. I want a pair of tits, too. I'd like to opt in.

I would like to pick a pair. Tommy, shut up, man. Here's what I'm going to say, Brandon. I don't mind them fake. If you can pick out a pair of tits that I like. Nip's not too big. I will unshun you. You're talking to me right now.

Shun. Big cat, come on. Big cat. Dan. Just me. Just Brandon. Just Brandy. Just B-Walk.

Come on. All right. You know what? I'm doing Kyle's titties right now. Kyle was first. He asked for the titties first. Please, please. Does your tit guy have other guys he sends the tits to, I wonder?

Or are you like his only client? No, I'm his only client. Would you be jealous? All right. I picked out Kyle's tits. I wouldn't mind having a pussy guy. I'll just say that right now. I don't want a pussy guy.

Those are disgusting. Taylor LeJuan. I'll add him. All right. Yeah, I think titties would be the only kind of guy I want. No, you ask guys. Ask to. Brains, brains, brains guy.

I like to pick out my own. Send me your laughs. Send me girls laughing. Send me some TED Talks. Yeah, TED Talks. No. He was getting head. No.

Kyle, I have sent you the titties I've selected for you. The big reveal. Oh, no. That's great. That's great. I knew my boy. I knew it. Damn.

Can I hook you up? I don't want you to explain the titties, but explain how it met the criteria. No. Between the two of them. He just gets you. Just between the two of them. All right. Find a pair for me.

You're next? Yeah. Will you do the high noon ad, Nick? We only have one sheet. Are there multiple ads? Nope. Just this one. Alright. You guys know it's high noon. It's time to load up on the ice and break

out the oversized lawn games because the high noon game day pack is back. It includes limited edition fan faves, pear and cranberry along with black cherry and grapefruit. Tommy, which one's your favorite out of those four? Those four? I like black cherry the best. I don't know if we're allowed to talk about it. The tangerine in the new El Pres pack is diabolical.

It's diabolical. It's so good. Hell yeah, man. That's awesome. But we're talking about the limited edition game day pack right now, which are great. It's a fall exclusive, which means it's here for a good time, not a long time. You can visit highnoonspirits.com before your next tailgate to find a pack near you. I'm going to have three of them tonight at Mook's show.

Sure. And Big Cat's show. Yeah. Still tickets for the 9 o'clock show. They're selling fast. So 7 o'clock sold out. 9 o'clock. Buy tickets.

I'm going to give something to a random person at that evening show. Oh. Laugh Factory. That made it sound like a disease. An item. Go into the booth yeah um yeah it's gonna be great i'm hosting it so i'll i'll start and then at the end uh me mook and bader will do you know 10 15 minutes after all everyone's set that's what we decided bader and i decided so awesome you get some and i'll be up between bringing up every comedian are you doing like stay like stand up no maybe i'll tell a story or something and I decided. So you get some and I'll be up between bringing up every comedian.

Are you doing like stand up? No, maybe I'll tell a story or something. Do some crowd work? Yeah. The crowd going? Thank everyone. Yeah.

Maybe sentimental thoughts. Whoa. Advice. Nope. Whoa. And he likes most titties. Nope. Whoa. He's lying. Nope. No. He he likes most titties. Nope. Whoa.

Nope. He's lying. Nope. No. Try again. I'll give you one more try. Whoa. Nope.

You're lying. I like them, but they're not the ones that I love. I can hear a pin drop in here. I'll give you one more chance. We'll just pretend that didn't happen. Okay. That was like an appetizer and a moosh boosh. Okay.

Got him. Got him. That was quick. So wait, you said that one fast. Were you torn between these two? Yes. Okay, so I'll give you full immunity on the first one if the second one hits. Okay.

Oh, shit. Just because you guys admire good titties doesn't mean you're not friends with people with weird sad ones. Oh, hey, Kate. I forgot you were here. Right? Did you guys hear something? Oh, man. Stu would love this game.

Stand up. Yes. Yeah, I think so. Oh. Yeah. Wow. That's beautiful. Wow. He nailed it. Wow Wow He nailed it He nailed it

You knew those were You knew those were the ones anyway Alright So now Brandon you have to share With who? Well if you see It doesn't It doesn't have to be like

Equally distributed If you see Three days in a row It's three sets I would like. Okay. All right. Send them to me. Okay.

Okay. I won't care if you also. I'm sure Kyle and I's Venn diagram kind of looks like titties in its own right. I'm sure there's some crossover. Okay. Do you think there's titties out there that we both like? Well, I can tell you this. Yeah.

That the titties Kyle just got and the titties Dan just got, completely different titties. Wow. Wildly different titties. Wow. Wildly different titties. Wow. You know your boys' tits. Wow. That's impressive. You're a good friend.

Yeah. You can know what kind of titties your boys like. Yeah. Thank you, Brandon. You're welcome. Thank you. Thank you. All right.

I've been doing weighted self-dick socks to try to get back. Okay. That's a nice transition. They're the best for the ab burn. Weighted self dick sucks? Show us. You know the cable? You attach the rope to the cable, get on your knees,

and you get in a rounded position and bring them. Yeah, you're doing this in public. You're doing this. Yeah, at my gym. That's the way. That's my favorite ab exercise by a large margin i agree with you and all the times i've done it i've never once thought of it as a way to sell six you know what i'm talking about i know exactly what you're talking about i feel a little bit weird doing it in public but can anyone actually do that marilyn manson kyle going to actually suck his own dick.

There's got to be like What's the strategy? Is it throw your feet over your shoulder? No, I think you ought to sit on your Let's see who can get closest. Pretty close.

Yeah, Titus. All Titus has to do is put his chin down. I guess it depends on My dick's so big I can fucking suck it Alright Malasek Malasek's got his loser material he's giving me

So Big Cat was kind enough to help us You know finish the fundraising for the Czech lacrosse team That I played on this summer at the world championships And I promised him A 23rd place memento trophy, so I brought that stuff for him. He's got a 23rd place trophy. And how much did this trophy cost you?

What did I give you guys, $1,000? Two grand. Two grand. Jesus Christ. So, yeah, I have two things for you if you want me to come deliver. Yeah, I would love to see them. Well, no, show them to the camera first. Yeah, so we have Czech Republic mini lacrosse sticks signed by the come deliver. Yeah, I would love to see them. Well, no, show them to the camera first. Yeah, so we have

Czech Republic mini lacrosse sticks signed by the entire team. Oh, wait. Can you read some of the names? Yeah, we have Coach Brian Whitmer. We have... What? That's our head coach. Brian Whitmer? Yeah, he's from New York.

Oldest guy on the team. It was his seventh world championship, Pavel Doshly. Oh, yeah. Okay, Pavel. How old is he? He's 43. Holy shit. And has he ever finished higher than 23rd?

No, this is our highest finish ever. Oh, no. Pavel. So that was a big deal for us. We have youngest kid on the team, Lucas Kuchera. And, you know, we have a bunch of other guys on here. We have monkey boy number 19, who is Victor Blaha, who is one of our defenders.

But yeah, so we have a whole team signed on here. That's huge. This is the Czech national anthem they're playing. And we have, I believe what it is, is a picture of the whole team with a little note from the coach on the back of it. Show that to me. Is this the first piece of decor for the studio? It's in an envelope. I don't actually know exactly what it is, but I'm pretty sure that's what it is So show that to me. All right, I'll bring it up. Is this the first piece of decor for the studio? It's in an envelope.

I don't actually know exactly what it is, but I'm pretty sure that's what it is. The anthrax. So those are our two gifts from the Czech team. Don't dox yourself. No, this is not my address. This is his address. He doxed somebody else.

Good man, good man. But yeah, so we just wanted to say thank you for everything. And, you know, a lot of eyeballs on the Czech team, and that was a big deal for us, so we appreciate it. To take it 23rd in the world is pretty good. How many teams competed? 30. Okay.

But 30 had to qualify. So, I mean, there's 80 teams in the FIL unit, and we were top 30 to qualify, and then we came in 23rd. Oh, shit. 23rd in the world is is a good did you play zach wilson how did you do uh well how did i do personally yes not that i uh i mean we played as opposed to so our our draw was tough our pool was tough so we played three well yeah you're the 23rd best team so we played three draw would be tough we played three really good

teams two of them made like the actual playoff bracket that played like the u.s and canada to go to the gold uh and then one of the teams just because the how the draw worked out they won the second tier bracket and then we won the third tier bracket what was your worst game um probably israel spanked the shit out of us how bad uh 14-4 and you were Yeah, and they put me on SportsCenter Top 10, number two. I was getting scored on. Wait, what? You made that? We had to see that. We just... Why did we know this? Well, I mean, it was all over Twitter.

Nobody saw it? Quakes tweeted about it maybe 500 times. Yeah, I mean, that was... That was my buddy Nate Solomon on Israel went behind the back on me in the first quarter, and they put it all over SportsCenter. Jake also had beef with the Puerto Rican team. Yeah, true. I remember that. What happened? Well, I claimed that none of them were the first quarter, and they put it all over SportsCenter. Jake also had beef with the Puerto Rican team. Yeah, true. I remember that. What happened?

Well, I claimed that none of them were from Puerto Rico, and they got really mad at me. Does the Israel team call the sport La Star of David? You're a lacrosse birther? Wait, wait, wait. Malice, you claimed that they? So, like, the Czech team that I play on, like, 90% of the team is born and raised in the country. And then, like, the Puerto Rican guys are a bunch of, you know, guys with dissent. But you claimed it.

What do you mean? Yeah, I mean, yeah, I guess, yeah. You understand you claimed it. Yes, yes, I understand. But I'm speaking from a broader sense here. But you, this is like that story that went viral the dude that like bashed the chick who started a sushi restaurant and they found out that he started who also was a japanese yeah yeah a little bit yeah you're being like hey you guys aren't from puerto rico yeah but that's like

you're not from correct and i my choice of words was like kind of wrong i said they weren't puerto rican which is not true but um no they were up sounds like you started an international incident they they were very mean to me in the handshake line after they beat us i'll put it that way why did the czech republic just bomb puerto rico no but it was a ton of fun and um you know the guys had a good time and uh we actually the lacrosse was just approved to play in the 2028 olympics so that's kind of the next goal is to be in the Olympics in LA. How? No, no. You can't be an Olympian.

Why not? You just, come on. That would be my last hurrah and then I would hang it up forever. But like, what do you mean? Did you even have a hurrah? Yeah. Yeah, I mean, this is... What was your hurrah?

This has been the hurrah. Now it's like, you remember when Peyton Manning won the last Super Bowl he played in? That's... What... I'm genuinely asking, what was your hurrah? This has been the hurrah, and my last hurrah would be being in the Olympics. Like a month later? So finishing 23rd is the hurrah, and then the last hurrah is...

We're mid-hurrah right now, and then... You're mid-first hurrah? Hold on. What's the probability of you being in the Olympics? Not bad. What do you mean? How many teams they let in? So that's, I mean, a lot of things are TBD right now in terms of the lacrosse stuff because it's brand new.

I would assume it's more than 30 just because they kind of want to bring a lot of people in as it's a first-time sport, I guess over 100 years ago was when lacrosse was in the Olympics. Oh, my God. Malasek's going to be in the Olympics. He's going to get the tattoo of the rings. Oh, yeah. Left bicep, I've already got it kind of planned. Oh, no. Oh, no. This can't happen. That is the goal, so that would be pretty cool.

Big Head, if you fund the team, you could probably also get the Olympic rings tattooed. Yeah, everybody's allowed to get the rings can I be in the coaching staff? everybody's allowed to do whatever they want I'm just going to go get the tattoo today can I be on the coaching staff? yeah I mean honestly why not well you can't really

I'm not Puerto Rican we had a lot of guys see why not it's an Olympic coaching staff I honestly don't see why not. It's an Olympic coaching staff. I honestly don't see why he couldn't do it. Yeah, I see no qualms. I see no hang-ups. I guess I'm an Olympian.

Congratulations. Thank you. Thank you, guys. Thank you. I appreciate that. Big day. Here we go. Uh-oh.

Uh-oh. Oh, no. Oh, no. That was number two? On the run. I didn't even see. It was the middle of summer. Catch and shoot. Oh, no. Oh, no. That was number two? On the run. I didn't even see it. It was the middle of summer. Catch and shoot.

Oh. Jay. You bit so hard. Hey, but we got Stella Blue on SportsCenter. That was cool. Where? On my helmet. Let me see it.

Where? It's on my chin strap, chin guard. Oh, my God. Who's seeing that? If we got Stella Blue on SportsCenter, we can see it, right? It's on the right side of my helmet. But that's not on SportsCenter if we can't see it. Well, if you zoom in a little bit, it's on there.

Can we zoom in on the guy getting scored on? And you can see. I need Ravel to find out how much this was worth for your brand. Oh, man. All right. Stop it. Oh, yeah. All right. Stop it. Oh, yeah. Zoom in.

Damn, I'm thirsty for some coffee. Yup, yup. There it is. Wait, can you change the Stellar Blue profile picture on Twitter? As seen on the Czech national team. There it is. Getting scored on. SportsCenter.

Whoa. There it is. Getting sport on. Sports center. Yeah, it was cool. Yeah, it was. Big for the brand. Oh, shit. Malasek's two for two on this show of just being a buffoon, man. Are you going to give him the gift? Oh, yeah.

I'll come and do it. Oh, man. Are you going to give him the gift? Oh, yeah. I'll come and get him. Oh, man. He is the best. Still, maybe one of the greatest Yak episodes was going through that hole when Malicek dreamed threesome. The threesome. Oh, yeah.

We might have to play that, TJ. Just laugh again. All right. Okay. They have it addressed to my name in an address in Florida. Well, it's okay to address You forgot it's your home Alright, alright Boys a lot of sky in that photo photo beautiful long note on the back okay here's the note on the back to our good friend dan katz

i wanted to thank you for your generosity and giving to the czech men's lacrosse program thanks to your financial support the team was able to overcome our financial burdens and attend the world champ how you want to support you guys okay uh attend the world championships we are a team made up of working men, students, and young fathers Each player with his own role on the field And we needed a teammate like you to help us get there This is really nice Thank you for being part of the team

We wouldn't have done it without you We also would like to take this time To extend an offer For you to be on the coaching staff Of the 2028 Olympic roster Oh that's nice Holy shit I can't, I just can't offered for you to be on the coaching staff of the 2028 olympic roster oh that's nice holy shit i can't i just can't okay here's the other note my name is lucas kucera and this was my first

world championship representing my country i am 17 years old and one of the youngest players on the team i was fortunate enough to play well and led the team in scoring i am a student in high school and my older brother is on the team as well. Without your support, I would not have been able to have this experience. Holy shit, I might cry. That's really nice. That's fucking awesome.

Thank you, Malasek. I am all the way in on supporting the 2028 team. What exactly did that do? Oh, look at that. That's huge. Wait, you said the logo. No, I couldn't. No, he printed it. I am fully supporting the 2028 bid to be in the Olympics.

What exactly did that $2,000 do? I must have paid for, like, jerseys and shit. Travel, hotel... It clearly didn't pay for lacrosse lessons. It finished 23rd. All right, thank you, Malisek. I'm, like, touched. I'm, like, touched. If we raise Thank you, Malisek. I'm like touched. I'm like touched.

If we raise enough money, Malisek, can we design the uniforms for next year or for? Wait, we're saying if we raise enough money, you are going to let him be the coach. You said I don't see why not. If you can raise money to buy New Jersey, we can absolutely design New Jersey. All right. Yeah, absolutely. Do the Lithuania Grateful Dead. Yeah.

Yeah. I don't know that Jake has the authority to do any of this. I don't think so either. It sounds like a free-for-all, though. I'm in, though. I mean, that was like a really touching note that I read. I kind of, to be completely honest, I kind of want to finance the Puerto Rican team. Oh, we should.

I kind of want to finance the Puerto Rican team. We should just have a proxy war. We should all have a team.. We should all have teams. I want to play for the Puerto Ricans. You could. None of them. I don't see why not. So I have Albanian ancestry.

Could I just jump on a team? Yeah. So a lot of wrestlers do that. I always say this, but there'll be guys for San Marino who don't even have parents or grandparents from there. Really? You could just claim a country?

It's easier than you'd think. Yeah. Could you claim, like, an odd country? I don't think I could. I think you need a grandparent born in the country maybe. Okay. I think Italy you can do that. Like, I think my kids can get Italian passports.

Could they be on the Italian team? I don't know about that. They're not good at sports. You're 100% Polish. How good's the Polish team? Damn near, yeah. The Polish what team? How's the Polish wrestling team?

I don't know if they have one. How's the Polish submarine team? Submarine? What does that mean? That's a Polish joke. Polish Navy try to put screen doors on their submarines. No, you're going to really. You can joke around with Kyle.

You can't make fun of Poles. Oh, man. You can't? What else do you got? We make fun of ourselves. Yeah, we make fun of ourselves. I think I might have a little Polish in me. Yeah.

Somewhere. Yeah, actually, I think I do. Yeah. So there we go. Take one of those dog tests. What are you? I think Polish, a little Polish, Russian, and then half Irish. Really?

Yeah. Nothing. I thought it would be something darker. Yeah, I don't know. Maybe my parents just lied to me about all that. Yeah. I'm Puerto Rican. We're all Puerto Ricans We should do 23andMe's

But then reveal who's on there We have to guess We have to guess who's who That would be good I'm nervous to get mine Because the 23andMe Haven't they collected everyone's data And now they own the world

I did Ancestry.com once It said I was 40% Saudi arabian really that's badass i did ancestry.com when i was going to college because i wanted to turn out that i was native american and put that on my college apps uh but it was like no you're you're 40 saudi arabian and 20 persian just can't be true. I kind of. That's a gigantic percentage. Yeah. I'm mainly Middle Eastern. You should look mainly. Yeah.

So there could be like, I looked up, there was the Moors tribe of conquerors who came from the Middle East to Italy. So I probably was part of the conquerors. I was probably just part of the conquerors tribe, I guess. So you R&P'd is what you're saying. Yeah. Your family R&P'd. The boys R&P'd. The boys R&P'd. As they do. Saudi Arabia rocks. Thank you R&P'd is what you're saying. Yeah. Your family R&P'd. The boys R&P'd. The boys R&P'd.

Saudi Arabia rocks. Thank you. A lot of money. Yes. I'm a big live golfer. Yeah. Why not? Can we play the Malisek clip? Because it is a Hall of Fame clip. Titus has never heard of it. I told him about it the other day. Yeah. We didn't play it.

I also have not done that. I'm a pretty vanilla guy, guys. Man down, Jake. You got to sit. All right. Wait, keep pausing. Pause it. He's in a Twitter space.

He got into a Twitter space that was. He thought it was Virginia. He thought it was Virginia. Like basketball or something. And it turned out it was like they talking crazy in here or something like that. How did you think it was Virginia basketball basketball he's not in here anymore how did he confuse this i don't know with virginia basketball so he's like the only white dude in this whatever the space so so cool huge walt jr fan he does look like walt jr

i would have not done that i'm pretty vanilla guy guys man down Jake you gotta see it all right who would you do it with am I getting to pick anybody yeah in the world Jake all right let's see uh I'll do Rachel McAdams let me open google come on she was in the notebook No, I never said Rihanna wasn't hot Josh Is it a guy? You I have to pick a guy or a girl? Nah, you can pick another girl. Oh, no, it could be a guy.

Definitely a guy. No, the hell he can't. I'll pick a guy to make it interesting. You know what? Let's do the cast of The Notebook. Let's do Rachel McAdams and Ryan Gosling in the corner. What?

Can we get a sound drop of the No Helly King? That's an unreal sound. His dream threesome. No, you scroll back a corner. I just want to hear the No Helly King. His dream threesome's two. Another guy, No Helly King. He really is.

Jake might be like, he's hitting like a thousand on the app. He is. He's hitting zero on anus, though. Oh, really? Our most controversial episode was around him. Oh, no. Because Jake, we had him dry up his own turd in his windowsill. Oh, yeah.

The poop experiment. Yeah. And then we had just his own turdd in his windowsill. Oh, yeah. The poop experiment. Yeah. And then we had just his own turd sitting in his windowsill. And we had a debate. If you sprayed a turd with water, would it stink again? And so he brought his dried turd in

and he split it in half so he could have a dry side and a wet side. And the core of his shit had not yet dried. So the whole room just filled up. So we never got to the bottom of that no but it was the most it was the most polarizing episode ever he also had that turd in his apartment for like two weeks yeah yeah it didn't dry up i'm still i'm still on do we have the screenshot of him holding his turd he's wearing a lab coat but if you ask jake will say yes to anything yeah yeah he is yeah he's like three for three

on the act with three grand slams yeah yeah oh man man you like this this is cool yeah you want it no i'll give it to you also do you guys see billy football as the new coach of the yeah oh yeah yeah he's the coacher on the team. He's coaching. I think he's coaching. Yeah. Will he join the Uganda Generals coaching team ahead of the Africa Zone Series 2023

happening on 12th November 2023? Wow. Good for him. Very good for him. So I saw that flag football might be an Olympic sport. It is. It is. It is, yeah. And pros are... All right, so I saw that flag football might be an Olympic sport. It is. It is. It is, yeah.

And pros are asked. All right, so I saw a debate. Someone was like, Jamaica's so fast they could give the U.S. a run for their money. That's ridiculous. Nope. No. Wait, why is that ridiculous, though? They don't know how to play football.

They tried to make Devin Hester a wide receiver. Yeah. Look at Jordan Milata. He never played football, and now he's part of the Eagles. But catching the ball is a very important part. Yeah. Look at Jordan Milata. He never played football and now he's But catching the ball is a very important part. You still have to play run and route.

There's still so much to the game. Right. There's always been this hypothetical. If you had Usain Bolt just be a wide receiver, he still has to catch it.

Yeah. And you need a good quarterback too. NBA players switch to MLB and all kinds of stuff. What is this? U.S. Italy. We're down 6-0?

How the hell are we losing? What the fuck? We didn't get the ball yet. Oh. Was the first play a touchdown? Yeah. Who's on the roster? We watched this on Mostly Sports.

Why is the field? Raw means good. Okay. Who's playing? The two-point. Oh means good. Who's playing? Oh, wow. We saw that one. If we put NFL players in this, we would win by one trillion points. And I would watch every second of it. Even if they were retired NFL

players, you could have like 45-year-old guys go at this and we would crush. Can you bet on this? If it's in the Olympics? Taking like Bulgaria plus 167. What a thrill. This would give us post-9-11 levels of patriotism.

Italy's kind of putting it on us. But who is on the U.S.'s roster? It's a bunch of guys that played in college and never made it to the NFL. Or like the... Is it one or two feet? But the U.S., the upcoming Olympics, they said that they want pros to play. And pros want to play.

Like Tyreek Hill is going to be the greatest flag football player of all time. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Summer Olympics so they could do it.

Yeah. This will be good for Justin Fields' confidence. Fuck you. What if he's bad? What if he can't read the defense? This is our roster.

Oh, Bruce Mapp. I don't know any of those names. David Bobo Price. Our quarterback is a little short guy. Yeah, none of these names ring a bell. No, James Calhoun. Darrell Duclette. Oh, Duchette.

Latterick Smith, what a name. Which side is us? Some of these teams are our whole team Frankie Solomon Jr. seems like a name you would have come up with for the Ducks Yeah This is Italy's roster Let's have Tommy pronounce all these Do you want me to?

Yeah, number 19 Gianluca Santagostino 36 Flavio Puccini Nice, Tommy. What about 88? 88. Matteo Mozannica.

What about 23? Mozzannica. Giuseppe Delle Vecchia. I don't want to remember. Yeah, that's how you do it. Giuseppe Delle Vecchia. Your hands are pretty still. The C-H is a-

All right, now do the Americans, but do it in Italian. Oh, yeah. Pull up the Saudi Arabian team. I thought you were going to go a different route there. I don't think I should do that. Bruce Mapp. Number five. Number five.

Desmond Lewis. What about number 22? Ooh, seven. You could do Daryl Ducati. 22. David Bobo Priese. Ooh, nice. Yeah, he's good.

He's a real ass Italian. I'm going to set the most Italian Saudi Arabian there is. Damn. You don't know that, though. The worst part about this more is the quarterbacks have playbooks that they read. More Italian plays on the field. Why? What?

Watch this quarterback. I think they cut to him here. Yeah, look. He's got like a. Oh, my God. Fake Aaron Rodgers. It's an actual book. He puts a book?

He puts a book in his pocket. The book just says, go long. What the fuck? It just says, da bomb from Blitz. If you have a book on you, it's not a sport. They do that? If you're carrying a book. Yeah, he's got to play. Who are we kidding?

No one's watching any of this shit. No, I was watching... There's no way. If our pros... This is not football. No, no. If our pros played in flag football, I'd watch it. I watch a lot of shit in the Olympics I would never watch.

I'm not watching this shit. You wouldn't watch Tyreek Hill playing flag football? No, I would watch this. Oh. Yeah. But when the Olympics come around every four years, I watch shit I would never watch. I watch rowing. I watch all kinds of shit.

I would never watch swimming. When the Olympics are on, it's my favorite. I watch all of it. How long is the field? Good question. It's thin, but I watch all of them. How long is the field? Good question. Because it looks very small. It looks like it's like 50 maybe. Yeah, 50.

It's got to be a little wider. Because even that, like Tyreek Hill, you don't get to see Tyreek Hill be Tyreek Hill to feel that small. That's our quarterback, number seven. We're getting like real life NFL street. You know, I think Tyreek Hill would still do some Tyreek Hill shit. Yeah. He'll be fine.

Because you've still got to get his flag. I know, but it's so small, he'll just catch it and then score right away. We won't get the jitterbug-type shit where he's ripping off a long run because the field's too small. Tyreek Hill played flag football against, like, 50 women. What? There's a video of that. No way.

There's a video of that? Yeah. But they couldn't touch him. They could not touch him. Oh, my God.'s a video of that. No way. There's a video of that? Yeah. But they couldn't touch him. They could not touch him. Oh, my God. I want to watch that. Setback women's rights years. Thank God.

Put my shoe back on. My shoe came off. Yeah, pop it back on, brother. Yeah. It had been off for a second. I want to watch Tyree. Anybody? My shoes have been on the whole time.

Well, we're not talking. Anybody else want some titties? I would love to. Send me some titties. Yeah, I'll for a second. I want to watch Tyreek. My shoes have been on the whole time. Well, we're not talking. Anybody else want some titties? I would love some titties. Yeah, I'll take a pair. The entire girls' flag football team. All right, Tyreek. Which one is it? Scott, I'm with you.

He just jumped. I'm with you. I'm scared. I'm scared. Oh, Scott, I'm with you. Is this varsity? I don't think that matters at all. Yeah, it's definitely JV. You ever seen those videos of like the Japanese soccer players playing like three on a thousand? Yeah, little kids.

Yes. They're so funny. They're awesome. Yeah, pull that up. It's like masses of little kids running to them. They just keep passing it back and forth. Yeah, they're in like waves. Oh, it's so cool.

It's like the old, you know, like hypothetical. How many like five-year-olds could you beat up? I feel like that's the next iteration of Yak basketball. All right. You got to get, like, 300 youths to come to Barstool Invitational. Yes. And then we try to score on them as a team. What are you going to say, Brandon? All right.

I'll just tell you. Last night, the boys had a neighbor over. He's eight. We played two-on-two basketball. And I was doing the whole thing where I was an adult and I was dribbling around and he ripped me. He stole the ball from me.

What? The eight-year-old neighbor? He picked your pocket? He picked my pocket. I was doing the thing where I was dribbling. Hey, you want to come get it? You want to come get it?

You want to come get it? Did you foul him after? I foul hard after that. He just did a little... He faked me out. He did a little fake step and when I crossed over he just grabbed it. He just did a little. He faked me out. He did a little fake step. And when I crossed over, he just grabbed it. No.

He's eight. He's eight? Is he a specialist? He's good. He's good. He's good. He just grabbed it? He didn't like.

He knocked it out. You got to fucking just take him down to the paint. But he has. He is the kid with the great basketball goal. Like I told y'all, this neighbor has this incredible hoop. And he knows what he's doing, man. So wait, you went to his house to play? No, it was my house.

Brandon's ringing the doorbell. It was a home game, and he ripped me. Wait, did Jerry ever talk to Tommy? This Friday. Business-wise. Is he coming? Will he be here this Friday? Probably not.

I know. It's not a Jerry day. Right. Mondays, Tuesdays, Fridays, Saturdays are not Jerry days. Yeah, we got to get this on talks business-wise. I'll text Jerry and see if he's coming in Friday. If he's coming in Friday, I'll bring Tommy.

Although now that I'm coming in so early, I don't know if I'll be able to bring him, but we'll see. Oh, here we go. This is awesome. This is awesome. This is awesome. Some of these kids can run pretty well. Well, Asian kids on average are better than the average adult anywhere else. That's true.

Look at this. The kids got to come up with a strategy here. They just have the numbers. Look how many goalies. There's so many goalies. As the adults just say, screw this. I'm headed in over these losers. Suck it.

Yeah, we should do that on the basketball court. That would be fun. Cast and call. Us against 500 kids? Yeah. They'd kill us. They would kill us. No, they wouldn't.

If they're five. You're 6'5". You throw it over them. They'd kill us. They would kill us. No, they wouldn't. If they're five? You're 6'5". You threw it over them. My confidence is shot. Just palm the ball, stick it up high. Was he a big eight-year-old? No, he's tiny. Oh, no.

He's quick. But actually, that actually helps you because the lower he is at the ground. He's quick. He's quick. He's got good hands. Was he in hoop apparel or was he in pajama pants and flip-flops? Man, he had an Iverson sleeve on. Oh.

He brought a sleeve to your house for the game? That's his house now. Oh, man. Listen, ball is life to this kid, man. Shit. I pictured him wearing an and one shirt that's got trash talk on it. Those were the best. He had a headband on.

No. No. the best. He had a headband on. No! Mark, are you in the camp of the newer generation of kids is just so much more evolved than your generation or the opposite? What do you mean? In terms of athleticism? Yeah, it's

crazy. It is. It's horrifying. They don't play on travel teams. I think they're playing a lot earlier too. Yeah, these kids just pick one sport and they just go off. One of my early takes on Wim Benyama is I think he's too good. I think Victor Wim Benyama is just like, watching Victor Wim Benyama play basketball,

I actually don't enjoy it because he's so fucking good and so advanced that it just breaks my brain. And instead of being like, this is really cool, I just shut down. You don't even like it. I don't even like it. He's back to good right there was like a while yeah it was one bad workout one pre-season game right where he missed a bunch of shots and he still sucks he's still for the record has not played one second of nba basketball we've already he's already been

really good and then bad my latest one clip that was that one clip of Kenny Lofton Jr. backing him down. Yeah. Because there was the Britney Spears thing, too. That's right. Oh, yeah. My latest file was that he was a bust. So I'm glad to hear he's good again. He plays tonight, right?

It seems like he's the opposite now. It's insane to me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's like a cheek. He's good now. I'm with Titus. He's hard to comprehend when you're watching him. Yeah.

Yeah, his length is like when he's blocking a three-point shot. You're like, how the fuck? Yeah, I don't know. I'm kind of, I like, how the fuck? Yeah, I don't know. I'm kind of, I guess I'm just a hater. I don't know. I like watching instead of being like, damn. Oh, you definitely are a hater. Yeah, instead of going, damn, that's awesome,

I'm just like, fuck this guy. Yeah. This is unfair. Fuck this guy. Fuck. So what is he projected to do? Like, win every title ever? I mean, he is the highest, I mean,

he's the best prospect since LeBron James. How old is he? 19? Oh, so he's 19. Is he seven? Five. Five? Is that the future of the NBA?

Just like seven foot aliens? I think so, yeah. Yeah, I mean, it's a stretch. They've basically taken away like the big, beefy... Yeah, Durant was like the bridge to it. Yeah. Another guy.

It is funny when people are like yeah like Kevin Durant's the future of the NBA it's like well okay how can you make a 7 footer with his skills every time there's only one Kevin Durant but there's only one Wim Benyama

it's fun to say like this is the future it's like oh the future of the NFL is Patrick Mahomes okay we'll make another Patrick Mahomes. Okay. We'll make another Patrick Mahomes. Chet Holmgren. Yeah. Chet's still too skinny.

I'd box him down. Oh, I hate his beard. He's got a beard? He's got a beard? It looks dirty. I like his dad. His dad has the old camcorder. Oh, fuck that. At Gonzaga games.

He does. One of those dads. Oh, dude, if you could find a picture, it was hilarious. He would just sit there. That's a dad who beats his son He sits him down Puts on the film And his son's heart sinks

The ISO cam Tommy you're a Brittany Mahomes guy now? I just think she gets a little bit too bad Sometimes yeah You made me think about that And I kind of agree I couldn't really think of anything specific that she's done bad it's it was the champagne video and my theory has always been that patrick holmes is so

good and so likable that every the haters like mark titus have to find something to hate on on patrick holmes and you can't so you're. So you're like, oh, his wife sucks. Also, the champagne video, there's a hundred beer showers in every NFL game. Like, I'd rather get sprayed by my queen than by a fucking random fat lard. I'm sure she probably watched it and she probably cringed

and was like, yeah, I probably should've done that, but we also just won the fucking AFC championship game. Yeah, or it was the Bills game, right? Like, maybe the greatest game of football ever played. Yeah.

It's crazy that she was hated when Jackson Mahomes was right there. Yeah. Well, I think she was hated when Jackson Mahomes was right there. Yeah. Well, I think that's also why they lumped them in together. Yeah, TikToks. But it's also like, you know,

Brittany kind of has to Yeah, do you want her to like, treat him like shit? Yeah. She's ride or die. I would love to have me a Brittany Mahomes.

I respect that Mahomes is ride or die with his family like that. Yeah. He could easily take the easy path and be like, no, I don't want my brother. Right. Yeah. I mean, who knows?

Maybe Brittany Mahomes sees my TikTok, invites me to her suite. I'm sitting next to Taylor Swift. Who knows? Is there an ulterior motive to that? No, no, no. But as it starts to gain some steam. Everything Tommy does has an ulterior motive. He's never done anything out of kindness. It's always, how does

this help Tommy? I'll play chess, motherfucker. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. A little code switch on us there? Nah, he can't. He just code switched us? Code switch?

I said, I play chess, motherfucker. No, that's not how you said it. What the fuck just happened? That's not how you said it. Is that fuck just happened? That's not how you said it. Is that a quote? Can we rewind the tape? Yeah. Can we watch how he's spasming after he said it?

If you associate a certain type of speaking with a certain race, that's on you. Let's rewatch this and see. Nobody ever mentioned a reality language. Code switching. Is it? Nobody mentioned race. You could have code switched to anything. No one mentioned race.

No one mentioned race. Somebody mentioned race. You, literally you. You said race. You just said it. We gotta do advisors. Can we get a Nahi Cain, please?

For me? Yeah, wait. Let's listen to what Tommy just did. Okay, it probably can't go back. Tommy, what's your best impression? What the fuck? Switch? I play chess, motherfucker. What's your best impression of yourself? What the fuck? Switch? What?

I'll play chess, motherfucker. You even put on a different face. Me and Brandon are just so taken aback. Tommy, what's your best celebrity impression? Wanda Sykes. He does Wanda Sykes perfectly. Oh, hell no. I do a good Wanda Sykes.

It's good enough or it's not problematic. I don't. You heard it from him. By the way, we have breaking news. Breaking news. Dave has offered Connor Stallions a job at Barstool Sports. Wow. Yeah.

Connor Stallions has a standing offer for employment at Barstool Sports. I'd be proud to hire a Marine, a Michigan man, and born leader. We'd be lucky to have him. I don't penalize winners. I promote them. I would disagree penalize winners. I promote them. I would disagree with that part. He also spelled his name wrong, which means that he's basically hired. How old is this guy?

He looks young. 40? Dave hiring him before he even looks at the manifesto is quite the offer. What could go wrong? Do you hire somebody with a manifesto without at least giving it a look? No?

Here you do. Yeah, you probably need to just peruse it real quick. How many employees do you think we have already have a manifesto of some sort? Five? Okay. I mean, we obviously know a couple. I think Jeff D'Lo has one.

Yep. Stephen Chay He would have a Bucks manifesto Yeah I mean I'll just say it Rico's got a manifesto Rico 100% has a manifesto 100% Connor Griffin, Stanko

Yep Big T have a manifesto? Yep Yes Absolutely Billy started a manifesto Then got distracted Frank the Tank maybe

no he lets it all out he does an audible version of his manifesto every day who else who else has a manifesto Kelly Keegs Kelly Keegs has a manifesto she might have multiple manifestos

that's a manifesto guy look at him right there huge manifesto. She might have multiple manifestos. That's a manifesto guy. Look at him right there. He just walked by. Huge manifesto guy, Rico. I don't know though if he would plan out a manifesto. He might just act, I think. No, he would. I think he has plans for everything.

Castellani's got a manifesto. Oh, yeah. Who else? I think Mincy accidentally wrote a manifesto once. It's just his tweets. He just started writing. Yeah, his diary just started having weird overtones. Again, he uses Twitter as his diary.

Mook, why do you have your hands up like that? I'm counting. Oh. I think we should add Mook to the list now. Yeah. That's eight. Okay. I'm trying to think of who else.

I'm looking through the blogger list. T.J. can have a manifesto about Rutgers. A Rutgers manifesto for sure. He definitely does. Clemmer? Clemmer definitely has a manifesto. I think White Sox Dave could have a hilarious manifesto. Kirk has a manifesto. Oh, Francis.

Francis. Francis has it. Francis has many. Francis writes manifestos for other people. Francis for sure has a manifesto. I could see sass. Really? No.

Just jokes. Is a protocol not the cousin of the manifesto? They say. Yeah, he might have a protocol. You're right. He might have a protocol. You're right. He might have a protocol. Meek Phil? No.

Jack Mack. Yes. 100% manifesto. Wow. So the majority of our coworkers. Yeah, have manifestos. It's not a bad thing. Yeah, it is.

You have opinions. Every time it's a bad thing. Well, no, we haven't read the counter stallions yet. TJ, Google good manifestos. This should be interesting. Yeah, that's based on whose opinion. Yeah, just keep going. That's true.

Just keep going anyway. What are some good manifestos? Common sense is about eating man. Is it not? Is that not about cannibalism? No, I thought it was capitalism. See, there's a communist manifesto. Yes.

Vindication of the rights of women. Okay, these are. Okay. I'm out. Hell yeah. This is how they got to vote. Kate, have you been doing stuff to get your baby out? Yeah.

Eating spicy food? Spicy food. I had Indian food last night. I've been going for super long walks. Man. I've been... I saw you come in here. You can't even walk.

It's sitting on a nerve or something. Holy shit. Oh my God, Kate. What is your due date? They were supposed to induce me, like, tomorrow or the next day, and now they're super, like, booked. So they're like, sorry, we can't help you until next Wednesday. And they gave me the old yoink today.

Oh. Earmuffs. Oh, what? No, don't, don't, don't, guys, don't, don't. What's the old yoink? Yeah. You don't want to know. Still tight as a't, don't, guys. Don't, don't. What's the old yoink? Don't. Yeah. You don't want to know. Still tight as a drum, fellas.

Nothing doing in the hills. But wait, why a yoink? They dig up in there. You're asking too many questions, Nick. Yeah. They tested the old. You're asking too many questions. The old server.

The process server. The process server, yeah. I'm losing you. Yeah. The cervix. Well, if it makes you feel any better, I lived whatever it was the last year without knowing that Brandon had a titty guy.

That's true. Kind of the same pain. You don't listen to me. I've told everybody I knew I had a titty guy. You did not tell me. I would have fucking... Everybody knew I had a titty guy. How did everybody in the company know I had a titty guy but you?

Because you... Harbaugh. Thank you. Harbaugh, yes again. No. Does the guy expect anything from you? i mean thank you harbaugh yes again no do you go the guy expect anything yeah because i'm right well i was i don't know well i was gonna say i was gonna say everyone knew because you talked about it on mostly sports a lot yeah well that's dan you've had you i don't know that you know about mostly sports. I do. I try to come on. That might be why everybody knew.

Have you ever noticed? I try to come on every day. I always wear your shirts. Yeah, I try to come on every day, and you won't let me on. You come to the door and act like you're taking your dick out. No. Today I did a phone call. I went like this.

Phone call. Like you had a really important phone call you were missing. My phone was in my hand. I know. It was a phone call. I went like this. Like you had a really important phone call you were missing. My phone was in my hand. I know, it was a phone call. Does Titty Guy expect you to at least heart or like the photo? No, I give him feedback. Oh, you do? Yeah, sometimes I'll say, great pair today.

Just send him back a heart, your hard dick one time. Thanks, man, You really got me. Look at what you've done. Look at what you've done. More of this, please. I think the shocking part about it. Look at my fucking. You did this.

He's a very normal dude. Just a normal ass dude. Well, I don't know. Normal ass dude. That's a loose understanding of normal. Just a good ass dude Wait where is Sass That he saw this man

At a bar in New York Oh he's in New York He said you expressed Anger when he would go A day or so Without sending one How did you do that Well it's like

Pavlov's dogs No the Sent his letter The agreement The agreement is to send A pair of titties every day How did you express Your anger

Well he would get to The fucking weekend And he'd go out partying I get every day. How did you express your anger? Well, he would get to the fucking weekend and he'd go out partying. I get what he did. How did you express your anger? I would just fuck on my titties. It would be very passive aggressive. It would be like, you good? Question mark? I want my titties. Is it the same time every day?

No, and sometimes he'll go three days and he'll send three pair. That's worth it. But he has, again, I told you all last night, this is October 24th. He hasn't sent me a fresh pair since October 9th. So can he even claim to be my titty guy if he's not doing his job? Did he ever double up by accident? He has sent repeats before, yes.

Do you get upset? Do you send those back? There's so many titties. I'll just go ahead and tell you he sent Shannon Elizabeth twice who's that American Pie I would take Shannon Elizabeth twice American Pie, Nadia back to back you could

no you could you send them back what I will say repeat. Where does he get these from? If you Google nice titties on Google. That's all he's Googling, I'm sure. You should do a...

He knows I like wands. You should do a Stanko blog where you rate them, but then you get the repeat and you rate them again the second time around. Actually, I came this time. He knows my preferences as well. Has your titty preference changed over the years? No.

Although I like all of them. But I like blondes. And he goes from there. Okay. Same, brother. So it's always the full body shot? Well, it's never just titties. Is there ever coochie in it?

I told him to keep the coochie to a minimum. I'm about the titties. Is it always front-facing? Do you ever get a little side titty? There's some side titties. Any underboob? No. Is it always exposed to you?

Is it ever like wet t-shirt? No, it's always wide open. Nice. Asking somebody that's sending you titties to keep the coochie to a minimum is oddly straight. It's just like, yeah, I just want the titty. It's very tasteful.

I mean, what are we here for? We're here for tits. We're not here for anything else. If I wanted a coochie guy, I'd get a coochie guy. Don't want one. Coochie guys are probably weirder. Yeah.

You don't want a coochie guy on your I'd get a coochie guy. Don't want one. Coochie guys are probably weirder. Yeah. You don't want a coochie guy on your phone. No. All right. Tommy, do your impression of an ass guy. Nope. Yeah, you've done enough.

I'm fucking uncancellable. I'm like Rogan. Oh, man, Tommy. Ooh, that sent chills down my spine I've just been handed a letter. Okay. Can you bring this in? Oh, shoot. We have a letter. Who would a letter be from? This starts us on a mystery, murder mystery. We've previously put a request out to the audience to send us something, and I believe this is an answer to that.

Okay. Okay. A wedding? It's a wedding invite. I'm going. Yes. Very cute couple. We asked's a wedding invite. I'm going. Yes. Very cute couple. We asked for a wedding invite?

It is on Saturday. Well, that's football. In Olaf, Kansas. It's this Saturday? What the fuck? I can't do that. Yeah, it's this Saturday. Wait a minute.

Pull up the wheel. No. Somebody's going to Olaf. Very cute couple. Congratulations to McKinley and Russell. Two last names. That is two last names. What the hell?

Two very last names. Yeah. That's beautiful. I want to see the couple. I know. Me too. Oh, there was a note. I would love to invite anyone of the Yak cast to join my wedding.

The Yak is my daily go-to at work, and I watch the entire Celebrity Guesser case race. Wow. So you owe me. Love you all. Russell W. Love it. Okay.

So it does say I would like to invite any one of the Yaks, so he's only expecting one person. We'll send Mal a sec. Yeah. No problem. Zah, you're probably a fun wedding guy. Oh, Zah's the best wedding guy. We also got to get Zah in the camera.

Why is Zah not in the camera? He's directly under it. We need to put it up on the corner pointing down. Yeah, we need Zaha Kim. When you laugh, I need to be able to see you laughing. Yeah. No, but I'm down. I'll go to Olaf.

How far? Where's Olaf, Kansas? Let's see. O-L-A-T-H-E. Suburb of Kansas City. Kansas City is from there. Oh, wow. Will they call these Stein?

It's only eight hours from here, Zaha. I'm down. You can probably fly there. I got nothing to do this weekend. Can you go celebrate? It's not too far from Kansas City. And Russell. Okay, John might come. Should we spin the wheel, TJ?

Did you get mousetraps? Steven. This is when your computer glitches a little. You start to get worried. For season 11, do we need to make any wheel adjustments? Take mousetrap on. Oh, we are going to do. We should do that.

Let's do that Friday. Let's do a new name wheel. So it's going to be one name wheel on the main wheel, and everyone gets to do one thing on the secondary wheel. I like that. And so that way we'll remember what it is, and that will be the thing. Okay.

Okay. Send me your ideas for that. So we have them written out somewhere. And it could be anything. You know, make it fun. We have this whole office now, so. All right. All right.

Sweet. And that's a wrap. Good yak. Great yak. Great yak. Great yak. All right, we'll see everyone tomorrow. Maybe we'll see.

Maybe we'll confident town. Whoa. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see.

We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. All right. See you tomorrow. See you tomorrow. It's the act It's the act It's the act

It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act

It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act

It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act

It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act

It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act

It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act

It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act

It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act

It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act