The Yak - Brandon Might Have the Smallest Boat We've Ever Seen | The Yak 7-10-23

Episode Date: July 10, 2023

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Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Hello. We're back. We're back. Yeah. It's all big. It's all big. What a great break.

I missed you guys. It was a perfect break to just. Did you really, though? Yeah, I did. Oh, are you kidding me? I missed this a ton. I'll tell you Roback.com. Go to Roback.com Use promo code YAK. 20% off your first purchase Through the end of the week

Roback.com. Q-Zips, polos, hoodies joggers, shorts Roback.com. Promo code YAK The most comfortable gear in the world I... And this is probably something that only Stephen and Kate will understand, and anyone who's listening who's a parent. When you're away with – I didn't go anywhere.

Hey, Jerry. Jerry's here. And Juan mixed in the building. Get up for that shit. Do a spin. Do a spin. My lord, Jerry. He's a caprice.

It goes a little lower. Yeah, but then I don't want to sag. When you're away with just your children. Where'd you buy that? You look like you'd fart and everything would fall off. Be naked. Dude, I want to buy some really shitty drugs off you right now. That's what you look like.

These guys have the best drugs. No. My crack dealer dressed like that. It was really good crack. Probably the smallest shorts that they sell at Walmart. What an entrance. I think these are 2X. And the tailor-made visor just hops the whole thing off.

He had really good crack. The best. Are there different strains of crack? It depends on how you cook it. A crack dispensary would be hilarious. They step on it? It's truffle crack. It's all stepped on.

Everything's stepped on. Right. Did you tell right away? I smoked sheetrock before. What? I got beat. Oh. Yeah.

Did you know right away? When I smoked it, it looks like crack. Yeah. And then you're like, this is sheetrock? I watched like a, I've been on Columbia TikTok or whatever, and they're just like, they're like, yeah, we're dumping a couple bags of cement mix in here just to fill it out. And you're like, holy shit.

Baby laxatives, the big one, for Coke. Jerry's tweet about Dan Rapport going to Columbia. Did you guys see this? No. Rapport's like, going to a Columbiaumbia have a uh a bachelor party a bachelor party and jerry just quote you is like smart move not bringing your wife he's like i had to bring my girlfriend yeah oh yeah you that sucks yeah oh yeah good to see you jerry yeah Yeah, you guys too. Who's that chilling down there? Look at the cowbell collection. What's up, man?

Hey, guys. What's up? He's hanging out. I hate how happy he is. Just hanging out here in Illinois. Let's mute his mic for a while. That's perfect. Now I like Brandon.

He said he's here in Illinois, I heard like the asterisk after Illinois Yeah Oh he can't say anything He's catching the same fish every day It's the same exact fish Yeah 100% Same exact fish every day He probably just brought a bunch of shirts on the boat

It's the smallest fucking fish Yeah A damn tadpoles. Minnows. Tadpoles. Why don't you just chill for a minute and then we'll, you know. We'll ease into this. Get your thoughts together.

Figure out what you want to talk about. Yeah. Yeah. Let's. Paras statement. Let's slowly get in there. You have a lot on your supple chest. But I did miss you guys a lot.

What I was saying was when you're with your children for an extended period of time, by day two, you kind of go insane. And you're like, I just want to riff with the boys. It just kind of makes you go a little stir crazy. I rewatched all of Always Sunny. The whole entire episode of 16 seasons. Damn. It was good.

It's a good show. That's a lot of TV. It was kind of just like at some points it was just yeah it's a good show yeah so that's a lot a lot of tv it was it was kind of just like at some points it was just in the background you should have you should have instagram like storied it like you were in like you know greece or the hampton oh yeah yeah like here's a day in the life it was good i had a great break except for the heat i mean nick we're just talking i can't i can't this is the hottest I feel like it's been. Every damn year I forget about humidity. I don't know. I feel like this is the worst it's been.

My AC just doesn't work. I have one of those portable ones with a massive hose. Massive hose. Want to see the picture? My room looks like a fucking ICU right now. The hose is crazy. It's a huge hose? It's like 10 feet long.

You always have the biggest hose, dude. The hose is crazy. My bed is on the ground. You're waking up next to the massive hose. So you just have a hose blowing cold air directly in your face? Hose blow. Hose blowing. Has anyone ever seen a portable AC?

Yes. I'm going to send it to the Yak group chat. It's like a 1980s person's image of a robot, kind of. But also like what a big. That's a good way to describe it. What do you mean by portable? Like you're not bringing it. Oh, he brings it everywhere.

That's what it's called because it doesn't go directly in the window. Oh. Yeah, they're like on wheels, aren't they? It's like a giant T-shimit of fire. It's a goddamn. It's just a fan. This is so funny. This looks like, can you put it up, TJ?

It looks like you had a major, major flood in your apartment. I know. And they had to put this in to like demold it. So apparently you don't have to drain it because it has the hose. Oh, it's hose? It might, but it has the hose. Oh, look at the little trash can next to your bed. might. It has the hose. Look at the little trash can next to your bed. The disgrace.

And the lotion. Yeah, the lotion. What was the highlight of everyone's break? What'd you do? Look at that. Is that your masturbating lotion? My masturbating lotion. Right next to the hose.

Oh, yeah. Wait. Hold on a second. You said. Choose the lotion over the hose. That hose comes out of that compartment. You set us up for this. You're a good man.

You're a good ass man. Set to 69. Okay, join in. Say it again or something. Shay doesn't understand what's happening. All the fun for me. The lotion with the. With the hose. The lotion with the... With the hose.

The lotion is next to the hose. Jay, come on, boy. Come on, Jay. I don't know where we're going with this. Oh, man. How much were those and one shoes? $22, I think. Okay, perfect.

Are they real, though? Are you sure they're real? They're real. Yeah, they're legit. Size? Don't worry about it, bro. Five Okay, perfect. Are they real, though? Are you sure they're real? Oh, yeah, they're real. Yeah, they're legit. What size? Don't worry about it, bro. Five and a half.

What aisle? They were online. Oh, okay. Undercover cop. Yeah, you do. That dude. You go down. Sweet is so funny. So good.

The guy for people who didn't see it, there's a guy who has like, does he have a boom box? He has a boom box. Yeah. He's wearing exactly what Jerry's wearing, head to toe with a boom box. They put undercover cops in the subways. Oh, I've seen that. That was hilarious. Someone's like, I just yelled good morning, officer, and he looked up.

Jerry, you do look like an undercover cop. I can never be a cop. What the fuck is that? Dude, so the office... Is that an animal having sex? Wait, those camels are... Those llamas are fucking. They really were.

They put the... You got to turn it horizontal. They hung them the wrong way? That was just a birth. That was just a birth. Oh, my God. You guys must be pissed you're leaving right when we get the...

Right when we get this thing. I always wanted to work in a Delta Sky Lounge. Big Cat, I'm not going to Chicago. I'm going to stay here and watch Sideways Animal Planet. Dude, it bothers me way more than it should. Sideways TV. They fucking put all the TVs sideways. Wait, why?

They're all over the place, too, and they're all hung incorrectly. Oh, is it about to get fucking eaten? What are they eating? Oh, my God. They're not supposed to place too and they're all hung incorrectly. Oh, is it about to get fucking eaten? What are they eating? Oh my God. They're not supposed to have TV on them. They're supposed to have the schedule of who's in the podcast room on that day. Oh, please don't. That baby deer is about to get eaten by a mountain lion.

Right now it's just... Oh God. This is the worst room in the office for this to be on in front of too. My eyes keep going to it. They should just have all the TVs just playing different episodes. It was just born. It was just born. Oh, I don't need that.

That means it's so delicious. It does. That's extra delicious. No, it had a good run. Oh, what's this guy? There's always a bird. You're just born. You're probably like,

this is just how it is. Birds love watching. There's always a bird. You're probably like that. Yeah, that wasn't... You die right when you're born. You're like, that makes sense. Like, you don't know anything else.

That's true. Like, okay. That was a sweet. Yeah, I had a good life. I had everything off my list. The baby bucket. Breathing once. Yeah.

You probably thought that was fun. I could go happy. The baby bucket. Oh, man, where'd that bird go? Speaking of wild animals. Exhilarating. Finally did it. Oh, man. Where'd that bird go? Speaking of wild animals. Exhilarating. Finally did it. Here he comes.

Has anybody watched on that Chimp's Empire? I watched it. It was incredible. So good. It's like a mini series. It's four episodes. Look at him.

He's eating now. Of chimpanzees. That's the second thing. In Africa. Some jungle in Africa. But it's like they're all fighting for their territories. It's so interesting. They have legit soldiers and stuff, like monkey soldiers.

They go after each other. It's crazy. This guy's ripe for the picking. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Plus, one of the chimps' names is Pork Pie, which is pretty sweet. Porky Pie? Pork Pie.

Yeah, Pork Pie. Oh, no. I can't watch that. He's learning how to run. But these planet Earths, every single time, some animal's going to be killed, and then they shoot to a bird just chilling, watching the whole thing. Just being a creep. And what do we have here?

We can't do a show. No. I want to hear the voice behind it, because that's the best part of these videos. Oh, my God. What's that thing? Oh, he's letting them know, I think. Oh, shit.

They're, like, getting skittish now, because they know the camera is... TJ, put a poll up. Is this thing getting eaten? Oh, no. Wait, they're fighting? Don't waste your energy, guys. Are they eating each other? No, I think they're just playing around. Oh, they're fighting? Don't waste your energy, guys. Are they eating each other?

No, I think they're just playing around. Oh, they're having fun. See, he's learning how to have fun. He did live a good life. Yeah, they had fun. Having fun once? If you're born and you only have fun one time and then you die instantly after, that's a great life.

Yeah. Never experienced any badness. No, except for the excruciating pain of a lion. They don't know any badness. No. It was finally fun. Except for the excruciating pain of a lion. They don't know pain unless you, because they have nothing to compare it to. Nothing to compare it to. Yeah. That was standard.

That was average pain. Hardly hurt. This is different. It's like getting flicked. Hardly felt a thing. Yeah. As a lion has its jaws around your neck, you're like, oh, this is a weird feeling. Yeah.

They probably don't even know it's pain. No. They're probably like, that's not. That's why we got to start. I didn to enjoy that as much as I enjoyed the last 30 seconds. But let's see where this goes. Can't have the good without the bad. Who knows? This could be, this could end

up well for me. So TJ, can we turn this off or something? I'm not. We're the worst group of people to have anything in our line of sight. Sideways TV. The least, like,

this will just be us narrating Planet Earth for an entire show. Yeah. Maybe we talk to Brandon. Oh, fuck, he's gone. Goddamn. Well, maybe when he comes back.

He looks very happy out there. He does. He looks very happy. Yeah, he's just rubbed. He's, yeah, he's. He looks like a new guy. He looks like a different... Is that the Chicago office? Or is he still fucking home?

He should have called him from his boat. Yeah. Maybe he could take us for a boat ride later. I know he's going to go get Tommy to probably butter us up. Who's our numbers? Yeah. Works.

Tommy plays. He's gone. How do you guys like the new office setup? That seems stupid to me. Oh, Jesus. I think the receptionist desk should always be facing the door. It doesn't make any sense. Well, I think it's for the video of the doors opening and you're seeing a lounge.

Yeah. Yeah, I get it. Yeah, I don't know. I don't fuck with that at all. It kind of, I mean, I get it. It should be better. It also has the vibes of, like, getting, like, a haircut when you're, like, when Sass had the nervous breakdown

and shaved his head. Why does that have anything to do with it? It didn't really change anything. It just kind of threw some couches and was like, look, it's different. Oh, yeah. Well, that's what the whole office is. What was the budget?

I don't know. I'm assuming different. Oh, yeah. Well, that's what the whole office is. What was the budget? I don't know. I'm assuming zero. If I had to guess. A visual of Kelly trying to write a blog with Frank playing NFL Blitz right now. Yeah. Awesome. A lot of... That looks good.

That looks good. It does look better. It looks way better. Way better. Does it, or does it just look different? Or is it just decluttered right now? And it will get cluttered again, and it will look the same as it was? I don't know. Those couches are going to have stains on them.

I think it's literally just like when you move your couch in your house and you're like, this looks so much better. That's the best feeling. Then one day passes and you're like, this is just annoying. It's better. And there's Erica. Erica was very hands-on with the process.

She was moving all the cash. There's a ribbon cutting here? Yeah. Really? No. I was like, wow. That would be awesome. Are you going to do the ribbon cutting at the Chicago one?

No, I don't think so. I've done a ribbon cutting before. It's very awkward. Right, but you've got to. I've done two ribbon cuttings. One in front of our grit mural in Youngstown, Ohio. Who's in a fucking parking lot

behind a bar. No foot traffic. Yeah. No, no, tons of foot traffic. That's what Youngstown Bob was doing. Youngstown Bob was like, tons of people walk through this parking lot.

I was living in Youngstown during that time. Were? I was like tweeting at you guys like seeing if I could get in the action. Can you find that video, TJ? The best was the guy who showed up and we thought he showed up for us and he was just he was just doing a delivery he was a delivery guy he was going in the back of a restaurant

like oh like we'll wait for you and he's like what are you guys talking about look at that it's just you two alone yeah he said the, he said the mayor was going to come out. The mayor did not come. It was, yeah, it was literally in a parking lot. And then we did one for LaBearce, and that was awkward as well. For? The casino. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

Can I do the ribbon cutting then? Sure. Yes. Yeah. Oh, no. Sure. Yeah. Sure, Steven. Looking forward to to it i know you are do you guys have fun or what this yeah do the highlights i like that let's go highlights the rose and thorn yeah go i don't

want to go first i was just i i love going in the ocean and riding the waves. Where'd you go? Outer Banks. Nice. Sick. North Carolina is a great state. Good. Oh, yeah. Yeah, we were talking about that. We're in North Carolina. There's sharks out there, though.

Yeah, we saw some. Yeah. Did you do some body surfing? Body surfing, boogie boarding. Body surfing. Skitos. It was awesome. When you catch a wave.

Until you get swampier. I know. I'm pretty good at it, yeah. Your legs go up to your shoulders. It'ses. It was awesome. Until you get scorpions. I know. I'm pretty good at it, yeah. Your legs go up to your shoulders. That's the best. Horrible. Hey, what was your thorn? Mosquitoes.

Oh. Oh, and my flight got canceled yesterday. Then I hightailed what any man would do in that situation. Hightailed it to Richmond. Caught another flight. That got delayed three hours. You just watch people, and they're just content. What else can you do?

People just stand up straight. They don't look at their phone. They don't drink. They just stand there happy. And like, oh, yeah, I'll wait here for three hours. So what did you do? I paced around, stomped. Made a scene.

Crumbled up packaging. I'm very content when flying. People are patient. There's just nothing you can do. I was getting so pissed. I think it's the best feeling. You have no obligations. Like, hey, I'm very content when flying. People are patient. There's just nothing you can do. I was getting so pissed. I think it's the best feeling. You have no obligations, like, hey, I'm at the airport. At this point, it's like 10 p.m., and we're trying to go home,

and people are just standing there happy. It's not moving, just standing there. Yeah, I feel like once I'm traveling, once you leave your house, you're just at the whims of whatever. Just let it ride. Okay, what about you, Sass? Rose and thorn. I don't know what my rose was.

My thorn was probably the heat. The heat was driving me fucking insane. Had some really bad, really bad days with the heat. There was one day where... What do you mean you had bad days with the heat? Well, I didn where... What do you mean you had bad days? Well, I didn't have AC. The AC didn't get there until like Thursday. Oh.

Yeah. Did you stay in the city this whole time because you had shows? Oh, my God. So you didn't go this whole time. I want to say it was Wednesday. It was Wednesday where the heat was really bad. Did you eat barbecue on 4th of July? No.

Oh, that's depressing. I had a good fourth of july um and it was so hot and i had a show at 10 and it was at like this random club like i don't usually perform there and i went and i was like finally like i'm gonna get to go sit in the ac i got there it was in a basement no ac it was should have gone to a movie. I was on stage wiping my face off. It was insane. So that was rough. The heat was bad.

Rose? Probably just straight chilling. Yeah. Straight booing. Yeah. Fourth of July was really fun. I had to get time. Nice.

That was all. What about you, Jerry? I golfed every day. I golfed five days in a row. Wow. How was your guys' golf day? Oh, yeah. It was good, except that would be my thorn

as Rico had us waiting for like an hour before. That was bad. Why? I think he set it up so he could talk contracts with me. Oh. He brought that up before we even hit the first shot. Before the first shot. JR, are you getting better?

Yeah. I mean, last year I started at like 120s. Now I'm down to, I think I shot a 95 or 94. Hey. Dan shot like a 96, 97 maybe. Yeah. Dan played really well. Yeah, he did. You just did a little bit better. Yeah, a little bit. A Dan played really well Yeah, he did

You just did a little bit better Yeah, a little bit better Yeah, not a lot But my, what's the other one, Thorn? Yeah What's that? The worst part of your week Give your break

I don't know My son had a really bad haircut Oh What's he looking like? The haircut came out good He was just bad Oh Yeah, kids I mean, but that was it Yeah Oh What's he looking like? The haircut came out good He was just bad Oh Well that's

Yeah kids I mean but that was it Yeah I think my rose I took my I took my son on his first roller coaster Coney Island That was fun

Oh hell yeah Went to Coney Island too Yeah On the 4th of July Fun Oh Oh you were there for the whole See

Saw him Wow Yeah I was star struck Damn Yeah I mean he is a star Yeah That kind of looks fun It was a blast Yeah it is very fun Except it was also struck Damn Yeah I mean he is a star Yeah That kind of looks fun It was a blast

Yeah it is very fun Except it was also my thorn Why? It rained We went into the freak show there And I was just hoping to see Like some hefty guys A woman with beard

But it was just like A dude came out And he just started Using a power drill Into his face And like bleeding What? I just felt like so nauseous

What? That's like a real thing What are these? Freak shows? I just felt so nauseous. What? That's a real thing? What are these? Freak shows? It's the original freak show. It's wild. I went to this place called the Freak Bar. I saw the concert.

Was it a concert you were looking at? No. Goofy people. Mook was just like, there was this guy there with tattoos and face paint. Mook's like, hey, are you in the show? And the guy's like, no. Oh, no. Mook's never done anything right, so.

The freak show itself was gross. That's horrifying. I was like drilling into his nose. It came out so bloody, he would lick it and then just do the other part. No! And I was like, does he have to run that back or is it? He had to go, that was his first of eight shows. Oh my

God. My mom took me to that when I was like 10. I don't think this is for kids. Those guys do it for the love of the game. I didn't know that was a real I just saw that from American Horror Story. I didn't know that was a real thing. But a good thing that happened is I just put my name in a

raffle and I won eight days in Puerto Rico. What? What? That's almost too many. It's a freak show? Oh, no. It's like a food fair. Damn. They're like, hey, you didn't win the Trader Joe's gift card, but we put your name in the

mega raffle and we pooled yours. That's awesome. Put it in the mega. Put me in the mega. When are you going to go? I get to pick. I have 18 months. Damn.

Oh, in the winter. Yeah. That's awesome. Yeah, that's cool. Fuck yeah. It's really cool. It's huge. Insane. I probably won't go. You's awesome. Yeah, that's cool. Fuck yeah. It's really cool. It's huge. Insane.

I probably won't go. You won't. You definitely won't. It's cool that you won't. Deep, though. Oh, yeah. It's fun to win. Winning is actually even more fun than going.

Yeah, I took it from somebody that probably really wanted to go. Yeah. I've never seen the ocean. It's been the greatest trip of their life. Someone with family in Puerto Rico hasn't seen them in a long time, probably. Yeah. I'm very desperate to see their. What about you you can't do your trader joe's gift card a lot of toddler a lot of long days a lot of long days busy days but long days took him on the the

one day i was like i guess we'll just take the bus into the city because the bus is air conditioned and that's something to do is the journey oh yeah and he the bus is like really quiet have you ever been the yeah like really quiet i like ever been in the really quiet, I like four months ago I was packing something into the trunk of the car at Target and I was like holding him and I dropped fuck, I was like fuck something fell we're on this, he hasn't

said it since, we're on this quiet bus and all of a sudden he's like fuck fuck, fuck Pat and I have it on video we took a video and I did it on video. We took a video. Did you reinforce that behavior in any way, positively or negatively? It was. So I was saying, I was trying to distract him.

Look at the billboard over there. But once he saw my face change a little bit to try not to laugh, I saw his eyes light up. He was like, fuck. There's like a whole minute and a half video. Best case scenario is let him repeat it over and over again get it out of his system yeah so that you gotta soap him for like a whole minute

and a half you soap him up after soaped him up yeah put soap in his mouth so that was fun that's such a desperation parenting move by the way I've done that so no going like I've just been like I gotta do something like let's go on the train oh yeah just go like oh yeah a few stops and then turn around and go home that's what i was gonna do that's an hour a week yeah as ac that's what sometimes i take him on the train to secaucus

and we ride the escalators yeah then we come back home this time we took the bus into the city and i was excited for him because he wasn't in a car seat. So all of you childless losers, that's what you're missing out on. Fly out the windshield. Anybody get to go fishing? I was researching it the whole time where to go fishing around here but there's nothing close.

I'm itching to fish too. City Island in the Bronx does charter fishing trips. I don't want to go fly fishing. I don't even want to travel to go fishing. I just want to step out my fucking door and fish. What about you, Steven?

What was your Rosenthal? I went to the American Dream Mall. Yeah, awesome. That you guys have been to? Yeah, very, very cool. I built that mall. That's a fact. That's the house that Jerry built. Dream Mall? Yeah, awesome. You guys have been to? Yeah, very, very cool. I built that mall. That's a fact.

Jerry built, that's the house that Jerry built. It's a great house. So we went there and- What's your two, Jerry, exactly? Underground, pipe fitting. Okay, so yeah, he built it. He built the foundation. He built the base. I went number two in the bathroom.

I mean, it flushed pretty good. Hell yeah. Yeah. Thanks, Jerry. That was your rose? That was weird. You shit and it flushed? No, Hell yeah. Thanks, Jer. That was your rose? You shit and it flushed? No, well, I mean, if that's Jerry's hand. My new thorn is you saying I went number two.

If that's Jerry's handiwork. Who says that? I think I'd rather you say poopy. You swear and cuss here, dude. I'd rather you show me the shit than you say I went number two. I ootied in my tootsies, and it flushed. I got to go potty. I wanted to use this week to go to a ballpark I've never been to, but I didn't get the chance.

I haven't been to any of the Midwest ones, but all the East, all the West. So that was your number two was your rose? No. So it has an aquarium there, which is a decent aquarium. It's pretty good. So I asked my son, like, what's something he wants to see there? And he said a hammerhead shark. And I was like, oh, fuck. We're never going to see that. And they had a hammerhead aquarium there. It's a decent aquarium. It's pretty good. I asked my son what's something he wants to see there. He said a hammerhead shark. I was like, oh, fuck.

We're never going to see that. They had a hammerhead shark there. I know. Pretty sweet. That's a more common one for aquariums, I feel like. It's brutal to be a hammerhead shark and you live in a mall in Jersey. That's got to suck. Yeah, you thought your life was going to be sick.

You're a hammerhead no you're you're in a jersey mall they also look way different than i thought they just look like a penis like yeah hammerhead sharks no they don't i've seen yeah they do pictures of them i've seen photos yeah the one that we saw was like a penis at all oh yeah whose penis goes sideways at the top it's like up and then it's the head. It's like a wide head. Show us a picture of a hammerhead. We all know what a hammerhead shark looks like.

We all know what a penis looks like. I think I took a picture. What about you? Thank you. So first half of the week, my brother and my nephew were here. That's right. You got them all the snacks. Messing around with them.

Had a lot of fun with them. And then the second half, I went to a concert on Friday, Revolution. Oh, yeah. Out of Pier 17. That was pretty fun. Nice. What was the band? Revolution.

Revolution. Oh, I've seen them live. Yeah, they're pretty awesome. Yeah, they're great. That's awesome. And then, how do you, you said a roll, you call it? Thorn. My thorn is, I just found this TikTok account that I spent the last two or three days on

watching the same videos like over and over again. It's like 10 videos. These fucking guys, you know the toy Frank the Tank has that- The duck? Yeah. Yeah. They tape it to the bottom of their feet, right? They blindfold the one guy. We've got to watch this.

It's incredible. We've got to watch this. Asian guys blindfold the one guy with a belt, and then everyone else has two ducks taped to their feet, and you have to run around in a room as this guy is just beating living shit out of you. I have to watch this. Yeah. Where did it go wrong for you?

I've been watching the same, so it's like five or ten videos. I've been watching the same. Dude, I've wasted like 48 hours of my life. Before we dive into that, I have no idea what the hammerhead shark Che sent us is tiny. It's not a big hammerhead shark, but I'm just saying the shape of it.

Look at the fish behind it. Yeah, it's a small shark, but I'm just saying the shape of it is like a penis. A little, kind of, but it's a baby shark. Yeah. When it becomes a true hammerhead, it won't look like a penis. That's the only hammerhead I've seen,

so I can't attest. Oh, you were at the Codfather exhibit. Yeah, I guess so. Nice. That's so New Jersey. I love it. I got to see this video. TJ, give us your. I love it. I got to see this video. TJ, give us your Rosalind Thorne.

I got to see this. The whipping. We have to do it. My Thorn was I found an apartment in Chicago. Yeah. Yes. It's your Thorn? What neighborhood?

What neighborhood? Docks yourself? Sort of near the office. Great. Same building as a couple of the other guys. Hell yes. Max. Thorn was got removed from my flight on the way back.

What? Removed? Yeah. So I had like two hours before my flight. So I went and got food and sat down on the flight and immediately felt like I was going to throw up. We were pretty close to leaving. So I told the flight attendant I was going to go to the bathroom. And they were like, you got to wait. And I I was like I don't think that's a good idea

so I went to the bathroom, didn't throw up just splashed water on my face, walked out and they were like yeah you gotta get off they were like the pilot doesn't want to fly with a passenger that may feel sick so they took me off the flight and then they gave me a hotel and a flight in the morning. Holy shit, TJ.

Yeah. That's so. That's brutal. It was bad. The plane had to be, like, dead quiet staring at you. Oh, yeah. Was it, like, the most awkward? I was, like, sweating.

I couldn't, like, turn and look at anybody. I was very, yeah. Were you that dude from the video? No. The one freak out? The video was amazing. Did you see a medieval woman on the wing? That guy was not real, by the way. We all agree, right?

He's a lizard man. Yeah. You saw the way he blinked. He also didn't. If someone's like, that guy's not real, you just got to be like, wait, I am. He didn't try to defend himself. He didn't say anything.

PJ, that's crazy. Yeah, it sucked really bad. That's fucking nuts. I didn't even puke either. I just felt like I was gonna. That was right after I tweeted the picture of me with, like, ultimate leg room on the flight. Oh, no.

I liked that picture. Brutal. That sucks. Hey, Brandon, what was yours? All right, so I got to go fishing every single day. Me and the boys went fishing. We caught a lot of fish. And we went to Milwaukee Brewer Stadium.

It was awesome. I've never been there. Kind of what I wanted to do. Oh, yeah, fishing. You said you wanted to fish. Are you making this up? No, I sent you pictures of my fish every single day, Nick. Nick said he wanted to fish and go to a baseball stadium.

But I've sent Nick pictures of my fish every day. It's kind of weird just to rub it in. It's kind of rude. It's a little rude. It's kind of douchey. I love you still, man. I have two thorns. Two thorns.

Number one, I'm out of money. And number two, we've had multiple injuries out here oh no yeah the seven-year-old broke his collarbone what and then the seven-year-old also he has a retainer inside and he broke that too i don't know if that counts as an was he jumping off a fence again oh did he break the collarbone in new york yeah yeah i forgot where he broke also that's not multiple injuries that's just one injured boy Did you break the collarbone in New York? Yeah. Yeah. He broke the collarbone in New York. Okay. He had to break the collarbone. I forgot where he broke it. Also, that's not multiple injuries.

That's just one injured boy. No, I had to take him to the doctor to get this thing cut out. Oh, yeah. Oh. Oh, shit. You have no money left? I had to do it. My wife did it this morning.

Yeah. You have zero dollars? I'm out of money, yeah. So, I'm going to the fucking office. But you have a palace. I'm going to live in office. You have a palace. Brandon, what has exceeded your expectations about the new place? The weather out here, it's summertime, but it gets to like 88.

It doesn't get to 95. You like that? Yeah, it's so much better. Brandon sent me a picture from his seats when he went to the Brewers game. He said he had seats like in the second row, but it was too sunny, so he was sitting like in the nosebleeds. Yeah, I had to go from section 104 – or section 115 to section 229. I had to get out.

I asked the usher if I could sit back there. He said, yeah, nobody pays for those seats anyway. What about that cheese barn you went to? It's Mars Cheese Castle. Yeah, the Cheese Castle. I really undersold it. Super, super overpriced and just a total tourist trap. I did buy some ring bologna that was delicious.

The cheese place? Basically, when you cross the border, it's like the first thing you see is Mars Cheese Castle. And so you're like, oh, I got to go. And Brandon went. Oh, and was the one pepperoni pizza a joke or was that a real? He was serious. They put the pepperoni under the cheese. Yeah.

Is that a known thing? Yeah. No, I didn't know it, but apparently I didn't know that. I wouldn't know it either. Did he signify that that's the pepperoni pie? That looks good. Oh, I get it now. I like that. Yeah the pepperoni pie. So that looks good. Oh, I get it now. I like that.

Yeah. It was delicious. Do you have local hot spots or neighbors or what's good in the area? I haven't. I haven't. No, no. I haven't talked to any of the neighbors yet. My wife has.

I don't have any hot spots yet. I have a couple hot spots. Are you going to get the kids to play hockey now because they live on a lake? Like in the winter? I mean, their collarbone can't survive New York City. How's it going to survive hockey? I don't know. It would be cool to be, like, skating around and shit.

So the last guy that owned this house would put a hockey field out on the lake. And I don't know if the people of this neighborhood are going to be depending on me to do it. I think so. You have to. I think you have to spend a lot of money on that hockey. You're the sporty guy. Yeah. All I got to do is, he said he left me the equipment, but I don't know what to do or how to do it or when to do it.

Chief will set you up. Yeah, Chief will set you up. We should go play some hockey. I can do some pond hockey out here. Yeah. That would actually be i don't know how to skate very well you like went on any solo drives we should definitely uh no i all my drives have been with the family going to milwaukee and stuff like that i haven't explored

have you been to chicago yet oh absolutely not hey brandon we have to play Yak hockey now. It's right out here. That'd be worse than basketball. But better, maybe. Be more fun. Maybe. Oh. Oh. Oh. Man, that's awesome. That is nice.

We can just put it right there. What's the address? Yeah. Drop a pin. That one geogGuessr guy will find it. Yep. Yeah. Send it to him. He's a freak. Y'all talk about something else.

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or visit highnoonspirits.com to find it near you. High Noon is the drink of the summer. Highnoonspirits.com. The beef is here. Hola. Beef. Thank you. They're going to Le Bernardin.

Yes. Today, we couldn't get reservations until today, so I feel bad coming back the first day and I'm dipping out to go to this wonderful lunch. Le Bernardin? Le Bernardin. What did you say? Le Bernardin. I was saying Le Bernardin.

Le Bernardin, yeah. I'm about to Le Bernardin, you know what I mean? Listen, I told the beef. I went up to him kind of like Michael Corleone and Fredo. I knew it was you. I whispered to him. I said, if he tries to break my bread record, I will kill him. He's going to try.

I will also raise your children. You know, I know. That's cool. But I will kill that in writing. I better off that way, to be honest with you. You should probably get in an accident. So I just had one question for the beef. We all know you, but the audience.

Do you ever like watch the act? And you're like, what the fuck is Kate doing what do you mean like when she comes home drunk or like when she comes home hammered yeah or we do weird shit no I don't think so post tank race is how we post tank race

it was kind of in that genre it was right in that zone this baby literally is born out of the yak. I said, oh, hey. Oh, no, wet is weird. Wet is weird. What did you do today?

And then I'll go back and watch the yak to make sure that I'm not getting, you know, cucked. Well, it's like, you know, you laugh. She's at work and she comes home all wet. It wasn't me, you know. Like, all right, checks out. It was the wheel. All right, let's get that cat. Let's get out of here.

Okay, all right. Leave everyone. Don't have to worry about me. Have fun. Thank you in advance. Thank you so much. For everybody to know, Big Cat, $500 gift card.

Wow. You better not break that record. What if he beats it by a fuck ton, then you have to. That's true. You have to beat it by a lot. What's the record? 20. You have to get like 30.

You have to do the mix. You can't just go because there's the little ones with raisins that I could eat like 40 of those. Document it. Yes. Okay. God damn it. Yeah, he's going to crush it. I wish we had him longer Because I think we should have all

That is a baby born of yak Yeah Should have picked names For the name wheel Oh he'll be involved in that He's the man He'll be involved in that He'll be involved in that

I went to another like It wasn't Three star Michelin But it was like maybe A Michelin star Restaurant And Oh I'm sorry

I started I started to go What's going on Everything okay So one by my neighborhood That I It was like maybe a Michelin star restaurant. Oh, I'm sorry. I started to go. What's going on? Everything okay? It's the one by my neighborhood that I did. I had a gift card that I was given seven years ago when I moved to New York. And we were like, last week or the last two weeks in New York, let's go use it.

And I started to go for the bread record. And my wife was like, what are you doing? It's just us here. There's no point. I was like, bring more you doing? It's just us here. There's no point. I was like, bring more bread. You were stuck. Yeah, I just was like, it was complete memory. I was just like, oh, fuck.

I'm in a nice restaurant. Got to eat all the bread. Jerry, you been eating Carbone? Yeah, I went to Carbone. You got the Snickers pie? I did. It was delicious. Delicious.

It's always pretty good there. It's not Snickers pie? I did. It was delicious. Delicious. It's always pretty good there. It's not Snickers pie. Yeah. True. All right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Brandon? You look happy as hell.

Oh, it's retired. I know. It's done. I have been missing it, though. Not really. I am happy. I took my shirt off yesterday. What?

Well, I went boating for the first week and a half, and I never had the confidence to take my shirt off. But yesterday I just said, fuck it, and I went shirtless. And you haven't met any neighbors yet, right? No. No, I don't think so. How many other people are out on the lake when you go? There's usually two or three boats out there. There's some fishermen.

There's some kayakers. There's people for leisure, stuff like that. You don't talk to them? Not really. I'm out there doing my business, man. I'm out there. You give them the wave? You give them the boat wave?

Yeah. Yeah. Oh, that's your boat wave? That was the least casual boat wave. Dude, what is that? Hey, how you doing? You got to be like this. It's more one of these.

It looked like you were staring at the witness. Yeah, Sass and I. If I saw Sass, yeah, hey. I love that. I love what you two just had. You don't even, like, make eye. You honestly look the other way. Yeah, you kind of maybe even throw it up over your head.

Yeah. Oh. That's too high, though. No. Oh, no, no no no no no such thing is too high with a boat wave oh because you don't want to get too early too you got to do it when you're like kind of almost you know i don't know perpendicular i don't know what's parallel yeah parallel one of my favorite caleb videos is about the boat wave yeah yeah it's not this yeah that's

like you're like that's like distress yeah that like distress. Yeah, that would be SOS. Hey, help. Yeah. Yeah, like my boat doesn't work. Hey, how you guys doing? No. That's it. That's Brandon.

You can't be below face level. Oh. Yeah, you can. I don't think I'd wave back to you. No, you cannot. No, I would not wave back. All the way up. I'd call the cops.

Yeah. Now, I'm sure all your neighbors are in the same socioeconomic class as you. So far, yeah. I live in a cul-de-sac with about three other houses, but the greater lake has a bunch. So do you have the smallest boat on the lake, though? Oh, no. No, he can't. Oh, no.

He does. I do. Yeah. The smallest boat on the lake. And they probably slow down when they're passing you. It's like we don't want our wake to capsize this other dude's boat. That means probably lock the doors on their boat when they drive past you. That also means everyone has right of way over you.

Oh, no, Brandon. That's not how it works. Yes, it is. Smaller boat has to get out of the way. Can you take all of your kids out at once? This isn't the Hudson. This isn't the Nile. This is just a lake.

Can you take all of your kids out at once? I have to do shifts. Oh, no. You have to sign up on a sheet every morning. I bought a floating platform, but I take it out to the middle of the lake so they can swim. So I take two in the platform out, then I come back and get the other two and take them back out.

What kind of horsepower are we looking at? None whatsoever. I don't think the horses. Zero? Is it a rowboat? You got a fucking canoe? It's like a pony, right? I have an electric.

I have a trolling motor. All right. Small motor you stick on the front. I troll. And the guy left that for you? Or you had to buy it? I had to buy it, yeah. Can we get a price? I had to buy it, yeah. Can we get a price?

I had to buy it, Jerry. It's not that big of a deal. Price range. Give us a range. Jerry, I bought the goddamn boat. I don't know what's the thing. The only reason he's not telling you is because it's low, I bet. If it was high, he'd say it. No, it was actually high.

I would guess like five grand, six grand. Is it more or less than Jerry Zan won? Those were $22. $2,500. I bought the boat, this bar, a couch, and a desk for $3,000. Okay. That's not bad. That's not bad.

If you took the boat out, it's like $2,800. Well, I've already gotten rid of the desk. It was too busy. The bar isn't working either. Wait. Two of the three things you bought? Well, there were four things. There was also a couch, which has been delightful.

Okay, good. Yeah. How's it going back there? It's too hot. Too hot. Too hot. I wanted to go to the beach and go fishing so bad. Never got to it, though.

You know? I always wanted to catch a fish. Never caught one. Never caught a fish? It's a rush, Jerry. You should go catch Brandon's fish. I think he catches the same fish every day. Yeah, he does. That's not the same fish.

That's a different fish than the one yesterday. Good-looking. It's a good-looking bird. He's just changing the angles. Here's the swimming with bow-legged women. But somebody said you don't eat those fish, Brandon. No, I don't eat those fish. It's catch and release.

You can't eat them. Well, he's got to catch it again tomorrow. True. Brandon, if you catch a fish that's over like 15 pounds, says Tommy, look at you and go, I think we're going to need a bigger boat. I'm pretty sure they're saying that anyway as they're taking shifts. A frog jumps into his boat.

He's like, oh, no. That's a big bird. Are we going to capsize? Do you have to have Tommy get in the water for that picture? See if we can get that far. A butterfly lands on the front, and he puts on his life jacket. He's like, not again. Take it on water.

Little ass boat. That's your whole boat right there, too, right? Yeah. That's your whole boat right there too, right? That's most of it. Actually, the person taking the picture is on the land. Why wouldn't he just give you the boat? I don't understand. Because we had a financial transaction. I bought the house, and then he was going to keep the boat.

But I said, hey, what's it worth to you to leave that boat for? He said, what boat? I didn't even know I had that. Are you talking about my safety boat? Was that like his dinghy that he used to get to his big boat? No, it's a boat. You're calling that a boat? It's a Fisher-Price.

He's like, oh, you mean my kid's boat? It's a good starter boat. Three chairs. It's a fishing boat. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, not that big of a deal. Are you going to fish today?

I fish every day. That fish is probably like, where's my food? Where's lunch? As soon as it turns 6 o'clock, I'm out. I haven't been stabbed in the face yet today. Yeah. What the hell is going on? Where's that big guy in the tiny boat?

It's already quarter till. I'm fucking sorry for that. What are you using bait-wise? Lures? What are we talking about? How pissed do you think the fish is when he gets up to the surface? He's like, that's the boat? I'm using top water baits because they're my favorite.

Top waters love top water. How many hooks? You're not going live bait? No live bait? You chasing the birds? You chasing the birds? No, two treble hooks. Two trebles?

I used to use three, and we would chase the birds. You got to be chasing the birds. I can't really keep up with the birds. What's the biggest? Is there any walleye in there? No, there's not walleye. I think there's northern pike in here, which I hooked one the other day, but I didn't get him in the boat.

Well, yeah, that would be a safety concern. Where do you store the boat? Do you just, like, put it under your arm and walk it up to the garage? He has a little teacup, and he just puts it over a little ass i tie it to the i tie it to my pier it's not going anywhere would you like i'll take a picture of the boat if you want to see it's a normal size boat why don't you go out now because i'm on the yak all in uh with your phone that's what i'm saying send a picture to tj, and TJ will put it up on the screen. We can't end the act until you catch a fish.

Yeah. Oh, I like that. I can't. It's the middle of the day. I can't go out until 6 o'clock. The sun has to go behind the trees a little bit. I feel bitch-made saying that out loud. It's all right.

Brandon, you seem happy, though. Yeah. I am happy. I'm much happier. Brandon, go take a, though. Yeah. I am happy. I'm much happier. Brandon, go take a picture of the boat and send it to TJ and then come back. I could just do it from right here. There's a window. Oh.

Where can I go fishing around? I want to see the whole boat. Where can I go fishing around the city? Fly fishing, though. What city? I'm not near a city. Where you used to live. Milwaukee?

Oh, I don't know. I've never. You've never fished around here? No. Fuck. I want to see this boat. Go take a picture of the boat. Send it to TJ.

TJ, can we find that Chinese guys whipping each other? Yeah. Out of context. That didn't sound great. Oh, here we go. What is this? Wait. Out of context. That didn't sound great. Oh, here we go. What is this? Oh, yeah. Yeah, Zai, you did waste a lot of time.

What the? How high were you? So, of this style. What is this? Of this style, they only have like ten of them out. I've watched these like 30 times. Should all walk at the same time. Oh! Oh!

We have to play this. What are the comments saying? I think it's five minutes long. Jesus Christ. They're eating it up. I was watching some Chinese guys play slippery hopscotch. Did you see that? No.

They have a bowl of water and a real slippery hopscotch course. Just try to hopscotch down it with a bowl of water in front of them. I'm sorry. I mean, my brain is cooked. I watched like... I spent two days just watching. Who were you trying to get out of that? Dude, if I could tell you, I'll tell you.

Were you giggling the whole time? I could be dying laughing. Oh, you didn't laugh just now? I was dying. Oh, look at me. I'm in tears. I'm in tears right now. I was dying.

I didn't really see it that well. What was going on? So this one is the only one version where the people running away are also armed with the flip-flops. Usually they have no flip-flops whatsoever. Oh, let's watch that. I want to watch that. They're just running around. And you re-watched these videos?

They only have like 10 of them on their page. I've watched all of them. Of this style. That's the wrong time to edit it. That hits. Okay, I get it. I see.

I like this a lot. You have to play it. Like this a lot He's stuck Now we have to play this. Oh, this game's going to rule. Did you guys see the guy who broke his knees? That was the best video ever. Yeah, that video was wild. Both at the same time? Did you see it?

No. Did you see it, Nick? No. It was one of my favorite injury videos I've ever seen. What sport was he doing? Arguing balls and strikes at a youth baseball game. What? What happened?

He falls down the stairs. I've never seen an injury like this. It looks so painful. His knee is like a wall. He's paralyzed now. Yeah. Is he? I don't know, but he probably is.

No, you don't. You're even going out. You're going out. I know. You're going to get me. Oh, no. Oh! Oh! Oh, my. Dude.

He was complaining about the youth refs. I don't know if it was youth, but he was complaining balls and strikes. Oh. Those knees just bucking out dude there's a part two where they have the stretcher too that's so funny how do you even cope with that i don't i would say the only thing that you could do if you're him in that situation is keep arguing yeah like and and blame the umps for your injury. Like, you made me do this. What the fuck? His knees popped.

Popped. He sprung a little bit. That's tough. The bones were like popping out of his fucking. Oh. Love it. That guy's got to be on the shelf for. He's not going to be back to normal for two plus years.

I would say ever. There's a certain age where you get hurt and you're just done for life. You're just hurt forever. Yeah. Yeah. No, he's going to be like 20 years from now. He's like, yeah, my fake knees are acting up. Like, what happened?

It's like, whoa, I was in a game. Just can't tell the truth. The best part about this video is there's a woman that's in front of him who appears to know him and is trying to talk him out from going down and then he starts to go down and she puts her face in her hands. I need to know what level of

baseball. I think the best part is the lower the level the funnier. I was saying it would have been a 10 out of 10 video if they panned and it was eight-year-olds. Yeah. Someone said online if it was coach pitch, and he was arguing about that. Perfect. Dana's looking big. Yeah, he's disgusting.

I mean, he is. He's a big boy. He's living his life. He's going to hit a point of no return soon Yeah He's gonna break his kneecaps Okay so what else we got Yeah I don't know I missed you guys a lot

A lot a lot I can imagine A lot a lot You didn't, a lot. I can imagine. A lot, a lot. He didn't really even text. No. Oh, my God. Steven got into another argument about his athletic prowess. I saw that.

Oh, yeah. Yeah. What happened? I think I'm now just at the point where I'm just going to disagree with Steven. You don't agree with Steven on that one? Who was it? It's a flawed question. I agree with Steven a thousand percent. Is this the completion out of 10 throws?

Out of 30. 30. Oh. How many do you got to complete? One. You would do an NFL game? Yeah, I would just run a cheap middle screen or something like that. What is the question?

Could you complete a pass? Could you complete one pass out of 30 in an NFL game? Yeah, I think you could. Yeah, like wide receiver screen. Right. It has to be beyond the line of scrimmage, but yeah, I would just throw something real short. I don't know. I would bet on no for myself.

I thought one of ten is a more interesting conversation. Agreed. And that's probably a no for almost everybody. And what about, like, do you get hit? Theoretically, yes, you could, but I'm not going to put myself in that situation. So then it might be a no. Then it's a no. No, because I would drop, like, a middle screen and I would take a huge lick.

Because if you do it, you get $20 million. Right, but you would get hit once and you'd be done. This isn't a real thing. Yeah. What do you mean This isn't a real thing. What do you mean it's not a real thing? I have a play that I'd run that I'd probably take a big shot on, but it'd be the easiest completion possible. A yard in front of the line of scrimmage.

$20 million. Steven, you would easily do that. Yeah, agreed. I don't know why that guy, Justin, what's his name? Justin Simmons? Justin Simmons. I mean, he's a Pro Bowl safety. He's a good player. He's not better that. Yeah, agreed. I don't know why that guy, Justin. What's his name? Justin Simmons? Justin Simmons. I mean, he's a Pro Bowl safety. He's a good player.

He's not better than Minka, though. That's true. If Minka says Steven can't do it, then he probably can't. Right. Okay. I mean. Nick Mangold said, like, no way. How?

Yeah, I believe. Now that I'm thinking about it. Dude, it's a one-yard pass. But he'd be running back like he has the worst offensive line ever. Remember the 49ers versus the Eagles. He'd be running the 49ers offense. They couldn't complete a pass. And they have NFL players. Is there a yardage minimum?

One yard. It has to be past the line of scrimmage. That was how their defense was playing. Yeah. I mean, I would draw it up so we're running the ball most of the time. So you'd burn your 30 plays? It's 30 passes. Okay.

So, I mean, yeah, I'd try and get on play action. So this is a fake hypothetical that you think is real, and you also are going to run a full offense. I don't understand why you're running the ball. Isn't the bet that you have to throw? He's going to establish the run. You don't have to score a touchdown, do you? No, you just have to get positive yards. Nobody wants to establish the run touchdown do you oh you just have to get positive

nobody wants to have you ever seen nfl cornerbacks some some of them play 10 yards off but they would know that he sucks exactly that's why i would run the ball thing that counts as a pass too uh it wouldn't be beyond it wouldn't be beyond line of scrimmage but if he gets a yard then you're and no the ball has to travel beyond line of scrimmage i still think you could do it so that's what i'm saying just like a cheap running back, middle screen. I'm going to take a hit. But again, they would know that you can't throw. The Eagles 49ers game is literally the hypothetical you're talking about,

except Christian McCaffrey is an NFL player. I put my hypothetical stats for a full game. Four for 17, eight picks. Wait, wait, wait. Your stats. Four? Four for 17, eight picks. Wait, wait, wait. Your stats. Four? Four for 17, eight picks. We were running the ball almost every play.

17 for 17, but eight picks? Yeah, four completions? Yes. If we're running the ball most of the time, yeah. How did you get to these numbers? This is if you were an NFL quarterback. Wait, if you throw eight picks, too, that means the other team has a ball a ton, so you probably – 17 is not – you're saying you, too, that means the other team has a ball a ton. So you probably 17 is not.

You're saying you're only how many plays you think you're running? I mean, most teams are like 66. But you're throwing eight picks. Yeah. So you're going to run less plays. Probably. Probably. That's fine.

We're going to run the ball 40 times. I don't think you have 54 plays. If you throw eight picks, you don't have 54 plays. I mean, they're going to take a bunch of these to the house. Ah, yes. Why? Why are they taking them to the house? Because I'm just terrible.

It's not like your job is to stop them from scoring after they pick the ball. I'm not trying to do that. I'm trying to get that one completion for 20 mil. What about if you took 10 kickoffs returns, could you make it past the 17? No. If it's a short kickoff, maybe, but if it's in the end zone, no, no shot. I'm too slow. Stephen, you can't just do that camp? Bucks camp? Don't you go to Bucks camp?

You don't have enough pull to let them do that for you? Oh, have the full defense out there and offense? Probably not. Absolutely not. I think you'd have enough pull for that. To get the whole team out there and let Jay sub in as quarterback? There's no way. I mean, yeah, Bucs, you got to do it.

Tell them, I mean, just tell them don't physically tackle you. So I'm friendly with Justin Simmons, or one of my guys is Justin Simmons' agent. So I was going to try and work some of those back channels. Because he's the guy that says I can't do it. I mean, it's the Bucs. They're just going to let me do it. I'm their guy. Why don't you just, Justin Simmons or whatever,

play one-on-one coverage against wide receiver and see. Well, then, no, I'm not going to complete a pass. Because he's, like, it would have to be a great ball. I mean, I guess it was a shot. But very unlikely. With no offensive line, anything like that. I mean, I'm sure you could pull up but very unlikely with no offensive line or anything like that. I'm sure you could pull up tape of Justin Simmons getting burnt. Oh, yeah.

It's not like they're perfect every play. You have 30 attempts at it. But getting burnt by another NFL player. Yeah. And getting the ball thrown by an NFL player. It's like you're establishing the run in this hypothetical. I think a better question would be like, could you do this against a high school team?

Complete one pass out of 30? Yes. But, Che, did you ever play football? Not organized. He's the roofball runner-up. Flag football in college. Actually, no, you're in third place roofball, right? I'm the yak champion of roofball.

Didn't KB beat you in the final round? No. No. Unfortunately, no. He did. That's not a real championship. What do you guys go to the Pacific Northwest? Yeah, so we can go to that, right?

Yes. When is that? September 24th or something? Week three. Yeah, no. You guys should go to that. It would be very funny. I hate that I only won for fictional points rather than a trip across the country to a suburban house yeah it's gonna

be sick what happens if i fucking win you won't i might you won't this one you didn't even win this one playing against the guy that destroyed all of us yeah you didn't win this one and now you're gonna win the U.S. Open? See what Wemby did his first game? He sucked. Second game, fucking dominated. This is why I got to lean into it. Yes, actually, I think you're going to win.

Me too. Oh, my God. Steven, Steven, Steven, Steven. I went to a WNBA game. Yeah? I sucked. Where were your seats? Did you have the nosebleeds there?

No, decent seats. What was the score? We left out the first. It was 29-6 after the first quarter. I would have stated it was a more competitive game, but the Seattle Storm are a very bad team. You think you could score a point in that game? No.

Full game? Yeah. I mean, size-wise, NBA game, absolutely not. Steven, put up a poll about you and Brittany Greiner. I guarantee you the Twitter world would just love you for that. Yeah, probably. Be on your side. She had a dunk yesterday. She had a dunk? Not like you and Brittany Griner. I guarantee you the Twitter world would just love you for that. Be on your side. She had a dunk yesterday.

She had a dunk? Yeah. I played some ball yesterday. I was looking pretty good. I'm looking forward to having a court. Brandon, what would you average in the WNBA? Right now or peak? Right now.

12 and 10. Can't even run a quarter mile. You can't. You have no fitness. Not going to need it. 12 and 10. Can't even run a quarter mile. You can't. You have no fitness. Not going to need it. 12 and 10. I just need to get down there like six times. You're a borderline all-star.

I'll just get down there six times. What was that? One lady, her career was like. Super. Yeah, you're like, she stinks. She was like 12 and 10. That's why I love Jerry. The whole internet was like. The greatest athlete of all time. Yeah, it was like super, super. Jerry was like,th and 10th. That's why I love Jerry. The whole internet was like- The greatest athlete of all time.

Yeah, it was like Sue Bird, Sue Bird, and Jerry was like, she fucking averaged five points. What the fuck? Fucking crumb. Sue Bird is a fucking crumb, isn't she? It's a lush. I mean, the part that bothers me the most is like- I'm going to get in trouble. Forget it. Oh, okay. I'm going to get in a lot of trouble. Bothers you most about, and I'm going to get in trouble. Forget it.

Oh, yeah. I'm going to get in a lot of trouble. Bothers you most about what? I'm going to get in a lot of trouble. I'm just going to keep my mouth shut. What? No, you're not going to say it, but if there were something that would bother you,

what would it be? Like, what's something that would bother somebody exactly like you? Like, why do they feel... Oh, okay. All right, never mind, never mind. Why do these women... Never mind. First sentence.

Why do they... What gives them the right... Never mind. See, that's why I can't do this show. WNBA's got some hoopers, though. They do not. Absolutely do. This one moment on the Connecticut Sun was just Euro-stepping everybody.

Jerry. Jerry. I always spin the wheel to refresh ourselves. Oh, fuck. Jerry, you're the goat. Oh, wow. I'm going to be Milk TJ. Not Milk TJ.

Hey. Hey. No, TJ, but like... Hey, yo. No, no, no. Whose wheel is that on? I don't think anyone hates anything more than Jerry hates the WNBA. Like... Oh my God. It's your guy's list of, remember your anus episode that you did?

It was just a short video when he did, was it Worst Things? Oh, yeah. It was like who you, KB had poverty and shit. I think Kyle had like juicy fruit gum and I took cancer. Yeah. Gary would be like WNBA. That's number one overall. Oh, shit.

All right, spin that shit, TJ. My Red Bulls are never going to show up. Thanks so much, Seth. They're going to be so warm. In the chain, I tried to buy them. I was in the middle of doing the rundown. And then Sass told me not to bother. Damn it.

And on that note, you can response. You can't just be there like 10 bucks for a Red Bull these days. You can't just be throwing around two Red Bulls every day. I didn't see it. That adds up. If you don't reply. Oh, no. Time to hang out with you guys.

Yeah. What is this going to be? Bowling, no cameras. We still got bowling. Yeah, we got to bowl. It's going to be? Bowling, no cameras. We still got bowling. Yeah, we got to bowl. It's going to be sick. Yeah. Wings?

Wings sounds good. Dude, popcorn day. Oh, not again. No, it's a different one. I think that's a literal corn maze. Popcorn day was so bad. It turned out very funny, though. We made a big old mess.

Oh, man, did we make a mess. Oh, no. Let's just run it back. God damn it. So I think popcorn day. It has something to do. I'll get the exact definition. It has something to do. I'll get the exact definition. I have something to do with a corn maze.

And it's when we're in Chicago. Okay. And in the middle, there's something. A corn. Some popcorn? No. Whoever gets to the center of the corn maze or the end of the corn maze last has to eat like an exorbitant amount of popcorn. Yeah, but we're just going to enter the maze together.

No, no, no. It's timed. Timed. All right. Actually, that would be very fun if we could find a corn maze and we could get Fasoli on the own above. Someone send me a list of while ago. Whoever DMed that to me a long time ago, just bump that.

That's actually very fun. This might be stupid. Is there anyone who's currently stuck in a maze? There has to be, right? No. We don't know. There doesn't have to be. Probably there's so many core mazes.

She said there has to be. There's core mazes all over the world. There's got to be one, dude. There's a lost soul. Oh, no. Currently can't find their way out. Who's been there? Not someone who just entered

We're currently searching for someone Who's lost in a... How many people do you think are lost right now? Like in the woods Yeah, lost A lot Like yelling help That's gotta be such a low point

How many people are screaming help? Right now Anybody! That's got to be such a low How many people are screaming help Right now Help Yeah Anybody That's got to suck Yeah that's like the worst You're calling for anybody Yeah

Like fucking Can anybody hear me Oh you said anybody Oh now I'll come get you Yeah Wait till we find out What the longest Is there like

Can you google What the longest Someone's been stuck In a corn maze for The worst in mazes. Is anyone out there? I hope it's a Yak fan. Oh, man. Especially if you're in the rain.

I'd be so embarrassed if someone was like, yeah. Dude, I'm right here. If you find out you're like 400 feet away from a town. A road, yeah. Dude, were you just fucking screaming in the woods? Buddy, we're trying to sleep. How was that? The whole town.

Yeah, it sounded like a goddamn lunatic in there. It was like a five-star hotel. Dude, was that you? Yeah. No. I was actually looking for the guy. He's probably still in there. Oh, wait.

We got to hit. Do they have the calls? Wait. Oh, this is Do they have the calls? Oh, this is going to be good. So for people who are listening to the podcast, it's 9-11 calls from someone. 9-11. 9-11. 9-11 calls.

9-11 calls. So we were listening to people like stop at the top of the towers. Someone else read the headline. Holy fuck. I feel high right now. Kat was pumped to hear stuck at the top of the Twin Towers. He's screaming for help.

We accidentally played that. Hey, hun, just wanted to say goodbye. Oh, yeah. Something's going on at the bottom of the tower. Stuck up here. It's worse than the time we got stuck in that corn maze. It's reminding me a lot of that time we got stuck. All right, wait, go ahead.

So corn isn't like a wall. You could just walk straight. You could, yeah. No, corn mazes are tough to get through. All right, 911 calls from people. Why'd you change your voice? They are. Lost in the world's biggest corn maze.

Oh, shit. Oh, my God, that's huge. Oh, yeah. I'm just like The Shining. This is... All right, wait, wait. Okay, hold on. I want to hear this.

He's stuck in a corn maze. We can't find a way out. I don't know what to do anymore. We've been in here like four hours. Yes, those are 911 calls. Dude, four hours. Because you should, like, call two or three hours in. Once your phone starts to die...

They were definitely too embarrassed. You're fucked. Where you're at in the corn maze? I mean, we can hear the freeway, but... They can hear the freeway? That's embarrassing. Just walk through the corn. Yeah, at that point,

you just got to put your head down and just destroy the maze. Where is that one? Dude, how many steps do we have? There's got to be a Slovenian kid stuck in one right now. It's California. What a dumb question.

Do you know where you're at in the corn maze? Yeah. He did ask. If you knew where you're at in the maze, you'd leave. I would be such short temper. If I knew where I was, I wouldn't be fucking calling you. That's got to go from silly, funny, to furious. The most mad you can be to be sucking a mace.

You can hear people talking. If you hear a little kid having fun, the parents are like, you did it. You're stuck in. The sound of little children having great time. I don't think I would be able to call. I wouldn't. I would be there in 10 hours.

That's so embarrassing. You can hear the hayride driving by. It's starting to get dark. Imagine if this conversation came up and we played a video and it was one of our voices. Fuck. That didn't happen. You've just been living in fear every day. Will they ever figure out I was stuck in a corn maze?

I don't know the last time I did a corn maze, but I do remember... I did one last summer. I got a little stuck. That's a little scary. You get a little stuck for a second. Those mirror mazes are always creepy. Oh, those are fucked, dude. I did one of those in the American Dream Mall

with Jeff D. Lowe. I took my son in there, and he just instantly was like, get me out. He ran into a wall, and he was like, get me out of here. And I was like, I don't know how. Yeah.

That was probably the first time he was like, dad can't save me. It was so bad. He was crying. He was just walking into mirrors and he was just like, get us out of here. And I was like, I can't. He probably thinks that's like your kryptonite. Yeah. So bad.

Such a failure on my part. Yeah, those mirror mazes are scary. They're scary as fuck. Especially, have you guys ever seen Us? What? Wait, what? Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

That sounds like they just tried to kill a child. They're trying to get rid of it. Yeah. So there is the biggest corn maze in the country is an hour 20 from Chicago. Yeah, we'll do that one. Yeah. And then whoever finishes last has to eat two tubs of popcorn. It's going to be hours and hours.

That's wild. Oh, thank you, man. I really would like. Yeah, I needed this. I want a doozy. Shout out Cliff DeMartino. Sure. Shout out DeMartino.

It's too big. Have a half. I'm good. I already drank mine. I want to do a maze now. Yeah, I really want to do a maze. Big cat. Biggest corn maze in the country. About an hour 20 from Chicago. A little under

from the suburbs. Cliff DiMartino willing to help out. We should Apple tag up. I have an Apple tag on us or something. Cliff DeMartino. He's able to help you guys get there. It's tough to find. It's going to be great.

We should definitely go out. We should get the fucking drone. Yeah. And just see who can. And if everyone has to go mic'd up with a gopro we have to do it drunk oh and then whoever finishes last has to eat two toes of popcorn okay yeah that sounds awesome you can come bro dude yeah let's schedule it the week you're there yeah you're in there you're there october isn't that? Yeah. It is. We'll do it the week after. It might be a little past because corn maize probably is like summer.

Oh, really? It's like early fall. I thought it was like a hayride kind of thing. Yes, yeah. You could do both. Yeah. Is it kind of weird that maize is like the Spanish word for corn? It's corn maize.

Mm-hmm. Just thought of that. What do you mean weird? Yeah, so the American Indians would call it maze maze. Yeah. Whoa. Never get out of that. You should play like strut.

Every ten minutes you have to take an article of corn. That's naked. The husk over your wiener. Headphones don't count. Bracelets don't count. Necklaces do. I would bracelet up. I would bracelet up if it counted.

Have you ever played any strip games, Stephen? In college once. Definitely way too old, yeah. Go on. What was it? Were there women? Yeah, there were. That is a fair question for Stephen. Yeah, it it was senior year we were in a house uh it was like

i got a bunch of my best friends and then we played with uh my buddy and his girlfriend he was very mad that we were playing with his girlfriend no it was just very funny because he was very resistant to the idea it was just just one woman? It was just one, yeah. Oh, no. That's insane. Wait, how many guys? I think it was three of us because we were playing beer pong two on two. Three guys, one girl. Yeah.

Nice. It didn't really progress anything beyond that. It was just kind of funny. How do you pitch that? Just be like, let's play a strip game when your buddy brings his girlfriend over. I would never talk to my friends again.

Oh, that's such a terrible night. What do you, yeah. It was fun. I mean, we were just like in our own door or whatever. He just starts dating

and says, you gotta be my buddies. Yeah. You guys wanna play strip pong? We always play strip pong. I mean, we play this every day.

Wait, is it Wednesday? Yeah, we always play strip pong on Wednesday. Oh, okay, I made it. I get to pick somebody. How about her? Yeah, we always play strip-clong on Wednesday. Okay, I made it. I get to pick somebody. How about her? Did we have that boat picture? Boat, boat.

No. Oh, man. I've never really been into that kind of thing, like the horny parties. Oh, wrestling parties, you're either getting naked or you're throwing the microwave off the roof. You've got to pick which type of drunk guy you are. What did you do?

I was neither. I was neither of the types, so I would break the shower head off. You had to break pieces of the house off. But you would just unscrew it? Yeah, but they would go all out. They wanted to ruin the house. I was just opening the pickle jar. Yeah.

Look what I did. That's funny. Putting the seat up. Bo Nickel. Yeah, Yeah I mean come on What a beast I want people to understand How good of a wrestler he is And then he knocked him out

Yeah Well that guy was nothing But still I love Bo Nickel He's great He's a fucking monster He's great He's great. He's a fucking monster. He's great. He's the goat.

Sneaky goat, at least. Well, you guys are going to do some more wrestling content, right? Yeah, for sure. I wanted to do that when we're out there because we're close to a lot of good schools. Chicago's a hotbed, yeah. It'd be really fun. Every city, though, that anybody says, you say, oh, wrestling powerhouse. Wrestling hotbeds. Pittsburgh.

Cleveland. Chicago. Jersey? The entire state of Jersey. Iowa. Yeah, Iowa. That count towards Chicago area? Not really, right?

It's close enough. Two hours, three hours? Wisconsin? Wisconsin's tough. Wisconsin got some bullies. Yeah. Michigan? Eastern PA.

Yeah, Michigan's good. Not Western PA? Western PA's great. Yeah. All of it, yeah. Texas? No. Oklahoma? Horrible. Oklahoma?

Horrible. Oklahoma's good. Yeah, great. What about Alabama? Horrible. The whole South sucks. Really? Georgia's getting better.

Anything out in the West? Yeah, California's good, but you just don't hear about them as much. That was wrestling hot spots. There we go That was the list I wonder if Brandon's found a Chick-fil-A I wonder if he's had it since he's been there Yeah that guy

That poor guy who's been delivering his Chick-fil-A Tough They just think he's dead Yeah For sure Which is better Yeah You'd much rather have that do you guys like tell your

barbers or i have to i don't get really like upset yeah the doorman i have that i really like and i'm really afraid to tell him or man yeah i just didn't even like talk to mine i'm just a big when i do those kind of goodbyes i'm just like yeah but i'll i'll come visit always say like yeah i'll see you because like the reality is sad yeah no it's like i'll never see each other again yeah i'll never see that person again in my life no way to yeah yeah know what you're up to yeah end of us right yeah you got to throw out the like cursory like i'll be back yeah this isn't a goodbye yeah right like yeah no no i've already got a couple trips planned. Yeah, I'll, like, give them my number and, like, text me.

Oh, no. That's crazy. I don't have anyone like that. No one? Not one person. Not, like, someone that I'm not, like, actually friends with. Friends with, yeah. I don't have any, like...

Like, the super at my building. Oh, no. Or I park my car Those type of people Yeah Car guys I already told They were like upset Your car guys

Like the guy The parking lot Next week Two weeks Damn 23rd Sheesh Oh yeah so the Yaks

Really real So What are we doing Alright so I'm leaving 23rd Show from New York The last week of July. I have grit week first week of August. And then after the first week of August, we can just divvy it.

I don't know. When are you guys moving? I was planning end of August. August 15th is when I get it. So. OK, so, yes. Easiest for the act. So we were going to do like we'll just all talk.

We'll do. So after the first week of august there'll maybe be some shows me and brandon and whoever else in chicago and then we'll do some here and then the last second to last week of august we're planning this we're gonna all come back to new york we're gonna do uh a case race i think we should do a KB's Wild. Yeah. So we'll tape those. So the second to last week of August will be the final week here.

And then we're going to take the last week of August off and then a restart. Yeah. Love it. That will be the schedule for everyone. Get all moved in and stuff. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, exactly.

Give everyone a week off. Jerry, when are you moving? Case race will be fun. August 15th. Nice. Nice. Case race will be fun. August 15th. Case Race would be fun. It would just do us. Baby Shane if he wanted to come.

What's Def? Shane might be too big of a star now. Might be. He's a star. He's a superstar. He's out there. Did you see? He's in on the new way to pee. 2023. In classic Che fashion, I don't think he was saying exactly what you were saying, but I'll give you it.

What are you talking about? He said he likes to go and piss his pants and then walk into the water. Right. That's the same thing. You were saying it's the funniest move ever. I just think it's funny. Right.

I'll give it to you. I'll give it to you. Piss your pants. Okay, yeah, all right. Yeah, that counts as a win. Che win. And then you piss your pants, and then you just walk in all right. Yeah, that counts as a win. Che win. And then you piss your pants. And then you just walk in the ocean.

Peeing in the sand. It's a good feeling. It is nice. It's hilarious. You're literally an adult peeing. I don't like this edit at all. It makes it seem like you're on the podcast. It's even better.

You guys are talking to one another. Wildly uncomfortable to watch. And it felt like I was in an underwater level of Wario. What sound was that? I don't know. That was terrible. I got a bunch of DMio. What sound was that? I don't know. That was terrible. I got a bunch of DMs. You made that?

No, I didn't. Delete that now. Who made that? Babe Truth. Babe. He's so good. He does so much work. He's good, yeah.

He's a good dude. Yeah. I like him. I thought he did a great job. But I got a lot of DMs about it, and then I listened to it, and then it was true. Same thing. Brothers in arms. Jerry,

you've been in Jersey all your life? Yes. I lived in Scottsdale for like four years. Pretty much, Jersey. Yeah,

Jersey my whole life. Are you letting it, is anyone like disappointed in you? Yeah, my mom, she's, you know,

she don't get it. Do you think you're going to move her out there? I don't think she would move. Yeah? I don't think so. I don't think so. I don't think she would move. Yeah? I don't think so. I don't think so. I don't know.

I'm not really upset anymore. I'm excited. Yeah. My friend's a little bit, but... I was sad like a month ago, and now it's like, let's just go. You know, for me, it's a little different. I don't know.

I built like a sobriety culture, you know? You built another one. I know, it's just... I. I don't know. Like, I built, like, a sobriety culture, you know. You built another one. I know. It's just. I'll go sober for you. No. Want me to? I'll fucking do it.

Those Midwest boys are tough eggs to crack, too. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Live by the bottle. They love the bottle. I know. I know.

We'll see. Not East Coast boys like us. We should make a video of Jerry, like, because, you know, whenever they do the maps of, like, the heaviest drinkers in America. Always Wisconsin. They're the top ten counties. What if you got Wisconsin to like. Turn them around.

Yeah. You could get Wisconsin just to be the number two drinking city. It would be the biggest victory ever. They would hate him. You know, I know people won't believe me, but the town I'm moving to, I'm excited to get in the political world there. Okay. I'm one of those people. Now I am too.

I am so excited. Can't wait. Come on. So what happened was when I went out there to visit, looking at houses, then we decided on that one. And then I went back out again, and I started to go eat at different places out there. And all the dads were like, dude dude we're so excited you're here like taking pictures signing stuff and like I just felt an overwhelming feeling I'm like dude I could take this fucking city over this could be my city you need to run for some type of public office oh that's that's in the

works Jerry that will be the funniest video series ever I'm not even lying way I felt, I even told my girlfriend in bed the other night, I'm like, she was like laughing, and she's like, you're so stupid. I'm like, dude, I could win something here. If I was running against you, I would kill myself. I could win something here. Somebody born and raised there. This guy comes and moves to the dentist office. Yo, I'm taking your job.

You need to make a lot of the political ads of you, like, in a dentist coat. Oh, yeah. You don't trust, like, 2023, don't trust doctors, still trust dentists. Jersey Jerry, DDS. But, yeah, I want to look into, like, how you go about something like that. Jerry, I'm so in. I will do. Because I think anybody can run for that spot.

Jerry, I will be your Koch brothers. I will fucking fund you. You're in a pretty big town, right? It is. I think it's like 65,000, 75,000, Shay? So what are you going to run for? I don't know. You know, I have no idea, but I want to get into it, you know, and just see what it's

about. I mean, I joined a bunch of Facebook pages and stuff. I've been retweeting their page once in a while. The dads were like, I was so excited when they got to meet me and stuff. Dude, these guys are great. They would vote for me in a second. In a second. 76,000.

76, right? When is the election? North suburbs. Brandon, you got anything? I have two things. Northwest, I think. Number one, Jerry, I don't think Midwestern people are going to take too kindly to a guy coming from Jersey. Probably not.

No, but Jerry's a matter-of-fact guy. He says it like it is. He's going to run on common sense. Alright, number two. You guys wouldn't agree that I could win the mayor race in Starkville, Mississippi and now you're all sucking Jerry's dick when he's moving to a town of 76,000 people. Yeah, I was tossing him neck.

Yeah, I think he would. Yeah. Dude, you get up in front of everyone and you're like I beat crack. Yeah. I'll beat whatever's happening. Look what I do on a daily basis. I save people. Yeah. I'll beat whatever's happening. Like, look what I do on a daily basis. I save people's lives. Right. It's like what I do.

What's a pothole to a guy that was addicted to crack? Right. Exactly. So we got to figure out what you're going to run for, though. I mean, I don't think I can go big fast. No, you can't go mayor. You know, I'm not going to do that. But there's got to be like a councilman.

Yeah. Yeah. Something like that. Yeah. Oh, my God, Jerry councilman. Yeah, something like that. Yeah. Oh my God, Jerry. I'm so excited. I will fund you. Blank check. I mean, I think parcel would too. Dude, we should be running fucking

political ads on. Dude, we could run like local ads. I will buy all the local ads for you. And I want to sling mud. Oh my God, I want you to get dirty. Like, I could go to, like, where they're working and work with them and show people, like, I am a working man still. If you found, like, dirt, like, very private dirt on your opponent,

would you tweet it out? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Now, what – so let's just say this happens. What happens? Debate, right? That's where I'm going to struggle. You're right.

So we got to coach up. That's what we're done. It's an earpiece. Whoa, whoa, whoa. You'd be the bigger candidate. Refuse. Oh, you could refuse. You could, right?

You could refuse. Then people will say, why won't Jerry debate? That's true. The debate's live, right? Probably. So what do you say if if the guy you're running against is like this guy can't even control his bowel movements how's he gonna control this city well do that i would say hey why don't you go eat 60 worth of taco bell

and then try to make it home in an hour and a half let's do that yeah that just shows that you're the common man. Yeah. Hold on. I got to find out when these fucking – we need to find what you can run for and when you can run because we got to get ahead of this. Brandon, what type of town is nearest to where you live? Oh, I'm in a town of 12,000 people. Oh, so you can take yours over. Well, that might be tough.

I don't know. I mean, these Midwestern people are set in their ways. I don't think they're going to welcome an outsider. How's the high school football team? Very good. Very good. Yeah. You should get into that.

Yeah, they're in the second biggest classification, and they went 8-2 last year. Oh. It's not better than where me and Steven Shea live. Well, I think we can build a state champion up here, though. I think I can. You should try to win a state title for the team. Become a booster of this, too?

Yeah. Is this the high school your kids will eventually go to? One of them is going this year, yes. Whoa. Holy shit. Any interest in coaching? None whatsoever. Coaching's bullshit.

Gary, I got a question for you. What happens if you win? I mean, I could still work at Barstool, right? Yeah, but what if you have to do other stuff? It's a part-time job, right? It's got to be a part-time job. I mean, I don't think you've got to go to the office every day. I'd imagine mayor is full-time.

Yeah, that's probably full-time. I don't think I would. I mean, I don't know. It depends. We've got to get you March. Yeah, March 2024 probably. I don't think I would. I mean, I don't know. It depends. We got to get you March or March 2024 is the next election. That's the next one. Yeah. I want you.

Yeah. Maybe. Imagine if you won like a seat in. Well, you got to. Yeah. You just got to start appearing at places. Yeah. Grassroots kind of movement and just just put some feelers out there.

Kissing babies. Yeah, there's like so many people that follow me on Twitter like live in that town. What's going to be your hook? Like what's your tagline? I got something here. It'd be like common problems, common man for the common problems. My buddy made it up. I got to find it.

What's your stance on immigration? We are close to it. We buddy made it up. I got to find it. What's your stance on immigration? In the Midwest. We're close to the Canadian. I'm a border guy, man. That's Canadian immigration. Oh, you're a wall guy? I don't know if I'm a wall guy. I mean, I'm not letting everybody in, though.

Okay, okay. I'm not a wall guy. They'll probably like that. Tough on drugs? Super. I mean, super tough on drugs. What, like death penalty? Yeah.

For what? For what? Weed? Nicotine? No, not nicotine. No. Not weed. Not weed.

Not weed. I promote snitching. I promote, if you want to smoke, you can smoke. You ain't smoking crack. You ain't shooting heroin. Not in your town. Not in my city. No.

What about guns? We love guns. Okay. We shooting heroin. Not in your town. Not in my city. Oh. What about guns? We love guns. Okay. We got to kill the drug addicts somehow. Yeah. You need something to kill the drug addicts. We love the guns. You got to teach the kids how to be tough snitching.

Abortion? Nah, you can pass. Yeah, I'm not going to comment. Okay. Okay. All right. Just whatever you're feeling that day. What about taxes? We don't pay taxes. Okay. All right. I'm're feeling that day. What about taxes?

We don't pay tax. Okay. All right. I'm voting for you. Yeah, so far so good. We ain't paying no tax. The whole town just crumbles. Yeah.

What happened? Well, we got a mayor and he told us not to pay our taxes. We had zero dollars going to infrastructure for four years. Okay. Okay. Okay. The roads aren't that great. All right, so we got to fix the roads. Roads.

What? It's going to be tax money. There was a little bumpy some parts of the town. Okay. It could be fixed, though. You want smooth roads everywhere. Yeah, brand new. Brand new.

Oh, yeah. Roller blade. Yeah, you want to be able to ride a razor scooter around the whole town. Yeah. In the town, there's this super cool Japanese market. Okay. I want to put an Italian market in there. You want to boot them out?

I didn't mean that. I didn't mean that. Are you going to build a wall around it? There's enough room for multiple markets. There is. This Japanese market is the perfect place for an Italian market. Steven, did you see that? Yes. Wait, Steven, you're going to be living in the same town.

Yeah, I mean, Jerry, like a mile and a half away. Can we get your vote? Of course, yeah. I have never seen a cluster of Japanese people. Oh. What? Like, I've never seen them in a large group of Japanese people. School girls.

Not with my eyes. Not in person. I mean, Steven could be the brains, too. I mean, Steven, you could do something, too, with me. What about LGBTQ? Oh, Eagle or not? What? Say it again? LGBTQ plus.

Good save. We don't go there. I'm not going to comment. We're not going to comment. We're going to... Just L. Just L. Good save. I ain't going to comment. We don't go there. I'm not going to comment. We're not going to comment. We're going to. How did the government do it? Just L. Just L.

L minus. Scissoring is fine. The L scene is very proactive. If we get the L's, you should be good. We're the most progressive L community. Jerry, would you hire me as your marketing campaign? Oh, dude. I would want this to be like a Barstool thing. Yeah. Dave ran

for mayor. Did he really? Yeah. Boston, right? Yeah. Did he really? He didn't get enough they kind of squeezed him out. They kind of ran some bullshit on him. Yeah. He got enough signatures and they kicked a bunch of signatures out. But yeah, I think you

I mean, it was great content. We got to do this. Yeah, no, dude, it'd be dope. No, Hank got hired. From the campaign? Dave's campaign manager, who was a kid named Weird Haircut Seth, hired Hank. Oh, wow. Holy shit.

Then Weird Haircut Seth got a weird haircut and quit. What do you think hurt Dave the most? In general? The signatures, the signatures. It was the signatures. No, they were, they did not want him to be in the race. Hurt Dave the most? In general? The signatures. It was the signatures. No, they did not want him to be in the race because he would have been a disruptor. I don't know if he would have won, but he would have been a disruptor.

I don't see myself like that. I don't think I'd be a disruptor. No. I think I would do a good job. Unless you're GBTQ. Or you're living. Is that like a... Or a Japanese market. If you're G through Q, you're fucked.

It's like a suburb. You'd have your team of L's. Jerry's rally is just a bunch of lesbians. Lesbians for Jerry. Let's print the shirts. Oh, my God. That would be so... Yes.

Lesbians for Jerry would be a good shirt. Oh, here comes Jerry and the L's. Oh, man God. That would be so. Yes. Lesbians for Jerry would be a good shirt. Oh, here comes Jerry and the L's. Oh, man, Jerry. We need this. I want this to be a whole series. Dude, I got deep with my girlfriend, dude. Like, I was like, I want this. Are you even old enough to run?

Oh, shit. Yeah, yeah. It's not president. Yeah. No, you could be a kid. Some towns have golden retrievers as mayor. Yeah, that's true. And again, he's not president. Yeah. No, you could be a kid. Some towns have golden retrievers as mayor. Yeah, that's true. And again, he's not running for mayor.

He'll eventually mayor. Yeah. But we got to work our way in. Like, I looked at it. Obviously, you know, he had no shop. Like, Kanye West put his name on the thing, right? Well, that was for president. President.

Like, anybody can do these things, right? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, dude. I'll take a shot. It's America. Imagine if you just didn't run a campaign, but you won, like, a seat. Just by your name.

Like, people just show up, and they're like, oh, fuck. Dan, I am telling you, dude. I don't think somebody would blow me out the water there. No. I don't. I really don't. That would be amazing. We need a tagline.

If Jerry got blown out. He got, like, he got Chase vote. Yeah. I mean, I'd be a big, like, for Yeah I mean I'd be a big like For the kids I'd be huge For the kids But not two for the kids

Cause that could be It's a little weird People could be like It's more of a T genre Yeah no I'd be I want the kids Yeah

You want You want the kids to be kids I want To be Elderly You know Like Hey they can't drive at a certain time.

Okay. You know, stuff like that. That's good. Got to be off the road at a certain time. That's already a thing in most places, though. Yeah. Is it really? Yeah.

You can't drive. In Massachusetts, I think if you're under, if you have like a junior operating license, you can only drive past, you can't drive past like 11, I think. What about old people? Old people shouldn't be able to drive at all. That's something that I'm passionate about. You should make the driving limit 60. This was part of my pitch to be a mayor

way down the road, is no teenagers at all. Just ship them all out. Oh! What does that even mean? Where are you going to ship them? Boarding school. Oh! No teenagers in the whole town. Why? Why are you anti-teen? No teenagers in the whole town, yeah. Why? Why are you anti-teen? It's one good thing teens contribute to a town. I'm anti-teen, too.

They're working at every ice cream shop. Oh, yeah, Rita's. Your kids would go to Rita's. Yeah, Rita's would take a hit. Your kids would go to boarding school. Yep. Okay. If they're teens at the time.

Because that's going to be, people are going to ask you that. You're sending your kids to boarding school? No, but see, you can't do that. Of course I can. No, but then that's like. You can't send all kids to boarding school because it's too expensive. No, you can't send all kids to boarding school and then not send your kid to boarding school. If my kid is a teen, then yes, they will go to boarding school.

Okay, okay. Just want to make sure we're consistent. But if they're 12, if they're 20, then no, they're good. Well, right. Yeah want to make sure we're consistent. But if they're 12, if they're 20, then no, they're good. Well, right. Yeah. Thanks for clarifying. What about 19? Boarding school.

Or college. Okay. Okay. 13? Boarding school. Teen pregnancy would skyrocket. By percentages, maybe, but not by numbers. That doesn't make sense Aren't boarding schools

Single sex? Oh you'd want them to Are boarding schools Boys and girls? Wait percentages went up And the numbers went up What does that mean? It's actually what percentages are

It's when the number goes up The percentages are numbers Wait what the fuck? Alright retract that part Do you think those are separate? Oh, so you'd split up boys and girls. This is our data guy, by the way. Percentages would skyrocket.

Numbers would go down. This is our data guy. Percentages, maybe. Yeah, look. There have been no additional teen pregnancies. Just the percentages. Yeah. 90% of kids are pregnant right now, but the numbers are the same. Well, if there's like one teen that's back, then technically it could be 100%.

But that would also be the number. Well, the number of pregnancies would be down because it would be up. They went from zero to one. What about like child soldiers, Jerry? They should start like a private militia. Throw her against. For what? Child soldiers.

Against. Okay. Against that. What if they want to? Yeah, freedom to choose. If I could write a perfect script, I would just love for you to win and then just go down in just a fucking ball of fury. I want this town to be post-apocalyptic. I want Jerry to take some type of scandal where he took a bribe.

He would definitely take a bribe. He would take any bribe. Just having to do crazy press conferences at all hours. I would want it to be like Nazi Germany where like no one really knew what was going on. There's just like a dictator in this tiny town in Chicago, in Illinois. And no one knows for like 10 years we find out later. But they have child soldiers in this town in Illinois. But no teen pregnancies have gone up, and there's been no crack.

Why doesn't the mattress store have to pay rent in this Japanese market? The slogan is the hard part, I think. Oh, yeah. We got to find it. The slogan is the hard part. Demon time. Yeah. Harley Tonights, you ready for demon time?

It's like Jersey Jerry, a name you know. Expect demon time. Then you with the boner. Yeah, you with the boner on the billboard. What happens when they bring up the boner? I guess fragrances. I mean, I could delete that right now. Yeah, but every, well, I haven't saved.

But every. We've all got it saved as our wallpaper. Every great, like, you know. They always have something. Yeah, they always are kind of like uh throwing their cock around yeah the thing is like what's so bad about a hard cock yeah and what's so bad about taking generic cialis or viagra right is that what you did for that video i took a viagra yeah that actually that makes me feel better. A lot better.

I love it. Do we have Brandon's boat picture? Look at that thing. That's not bad at all. That's good. It's the length of a fishing pole and a half. What, Brandon? A big-ass lake.

That's my boat. That's cool. Look at that calf muscle, too. Yeah a that's lights catching it real nicely too you must have crazy migraines out there i have oh i can't go out till six i have three seats one in the front one in the middle and one in the back i guess that's self-explanatory though it's a pretty small boat though it doesn't even you have to like really step up to get up on the i sit in the. I sit up on the platform, and then the kids sit in the back. No, but to get up on the dock, you're like... You need to get a ladder.

That's an easy step. You don't have to answer this if it's too personal. How's Tommy handling long distance? Oh, yeah. Tommy's going through it, man. Tommy's, yeah. Tommy's been talking it man Tommy's yeah Tommy's been talking about a lot of stuff you know what's crazy

Brandon doesn't even realize I photoshopped that boat to make it smaller oh really yeah he's so stupid that was too small to even insult I honestly didn't even see it in the picture TJ Washington the real

boat? Yeah, that's... That's the real boat. I felt bad. I was like, oh, shit. I didn't even realize I photoshopped it. Quigs said it's quigs. Wait, you photoshopped it?

Yeah. I was like, oh, man. You made the whole... You just made the boat smaller. Yeah, the was like, oh, my. But you made us all. You made the whole. Everything was relative. You just made the boat smaller. Yeah, the boat's just smaller, dude. Oh, I thought you made everything smaller. You can't even tell. It looks so small.

It is a huge difference, dude. You couldn't even sit down on that thing without it. You know what? I got to be honest. I have a tab open on my computer, and it's playing some sort of sports radio 790, and I got to figure it out. So I tab open on my computer, and it's playing some sort of sports radio 790, and I've got to figure it out. So I can't hear. Press the X.

Where is it? This is the oldest Brandon's ever looked. Yeah. Higher life. This is tough. Squint and looking at the screen. Leaning and scowling. Oh, wait.

I just did it. TJ, are you doing this to me? What? That's two. Whatever vehicle you have, you can find the right product. That's annoying. Wait, I just did it. TJ, are you doing this to me? What? That's annoying. You got to shut that down. Can you not hear it? No, we can hear it, yeah.

Yo, TJ, you're fucking with me. How? Explain. I'm not even listening to anything. All right, I got to go. I got to restart. No. TJ, are you doing this to me?

No, Brandon. Brandon, is it your phone making the noise? No. When you listen to his show, you're listening to one of the greatest sports talk hosts in America. That's right. Kentucky Sports Radio? Well, I'm intrigued. I thought it was one of the greatest sports talk hosts in America. I mean, people are already sending me campaign stuff. What are they sending you?

Logos, everything. I mean, these people are already sending me Campaign stuff Logos everything These people are all in bro Need stickers for Jerry signs I think what we need is Brandon what's your lawn game Looking like Oh yeah It's good I don't have I got a lake so I don't really

My yard isn't that big and I don't have to Take care of it we have people to take care of it for us. Yeah. All right. But I have flowers and there's an empty lot beside me so that helps. All right.

All right. All right. Okay. I do have ample room for the campout coming soon. All right. All right. All right.

All right. All right. All right. All right. All right. All right. All right. All right. Okay. Okay. I'd love to take any of you out on the boat I can't wait for Yak hockey Yak hockey's gonna be hilarious It's gonna go so poorly Yeah

Sass you'll have to come back out for that too Play on the ice That'll be the most experience Yeah On this lake When do you think that lake's gonna freeze over? It's going to go so poorly. Yeah. Sass, you'll have to come back out for that, too. Play on the ice? That'll be the most experienced. On this lake. When do you think the lake's going to freeze over? For hockey? Yeah. It has to be, like, good frozen.

Yeah, probably, like, late December. I'm going to go J1. Yeah. Okay. Someone probably drives their car on it to test it. Yeah, that's what they said. They said there'll be snowmobiles out there. Right.

And there'll be a lot of people out there testing and stuff. Oh, are you going to ice fish? Yeah, I have an ice fish. I bought an ice fishing set. That's sick. Wait, but you need the little barn. I don't have the barn. I just have the tent. Brandon, you need the little barn. I don't have the barn. I just have the tent.

Brandon, you need the barn. The barn is awesome. How am I going to get a barn? I can't build a barn. No, it's like a little shed, and then you can fish in the hole of it so you can sit in the shed while you fish. Yeah. Does that make it any warmer?

Because you're still sitting there. It's significantly warmer. There's probably not too bad. There's no wind. What? It's not that too hard to build? That would be a fun video. We should do that, too. Ice fishing's fun.

Okay. We should just... We went to the one where you just set the traps. Well, if we can get it set up, if he gets... I'll buy you the little shed. We should just record... We won't do it live, but we'll just do a full yak from the shed. I don't know about ice fishing.

I don't know how we get the... In theory, I would rather watch a pretty good commercial. Wait, but we're... The yak is built... We could be fishing right now. We wouldn't do anything different. It sounds

not great. You just sit there. There's no skill. I know. I'm saying we would just do anything different. It sounds not great. You just sit there. There's no skill. No, I know. I'm saying we would just do a yak. We'd just sit and do the yak anyway. And hope a fish comes. I don't know if my fish is going to be available. Yeah, you've got to plan that out. You've got to talk to your fish.

He's waiting. All right, Brandon, you can go. Dismissed. Okay. I have a confession. Yeah. I'm going to wait until he leaves. Oh, yeah.

I'm not going to X out if I know you're going to confess something. He also doesn't know how to leave. Fine, fine, fine. I was just going to say that I know we said we'd know more Sporkle, but I missed it. Yeah, I mean, we love playing it. I kind of lost it last time, and I don't know if I ever will get it back. Do you want to do one just to see? Let's do an off air.

Who could you? All right. Just one. The show's over. It's over. It's over. Play the end credits. And then just come back, TJ, and we'll play one sparkle.

Have you been on these crossover grids? Yeah. Very fun. Yeah. Here we go. The show. Okay, now, Jerry, I got to say this. We are still live. Yeah. All right.

That would have been a problem. Okay, I didn't know. I was going to say about the WNBA. All right, let's play one. Is this the game that somebody made? Is that the same game? It's Sporkle. What's that?

It's just you have to answer. Oh, yeah. It's someone, people made it for us. Yeah, yeah. Okay, I think I've played this with you guys before. B? That's dude, You gotta, please, man. Please. Oh, wow, Jerry. This campaign photo that someone...

Who just sent this? DJ did. Looks great. Where's it at? I just tweeted it. Jersey Jerry expect demon time 2023. Look at that. With the toothbrush.

The toothbrush doesn't really fit. Why a toothbrush? He lives in a dentist's office. Oh, yeah. I forgot. You should vote for Jerry. You get a free cleaning. That'd be cool.

You don't have to actually deliver. Okay, here we go. Look what they did with Coke. Free cheeseburgers. Top five categories viewed on Pornhub 2022. Top five food, retailer, groceries 2022. Top five Nielsen rankers for

2022. Top five salad dressing used in 2022. Top five Tom Hanks movies prior to 2015. Six most common cosmetic plastic surgery procedures 2020. Six coaches with most NCAA National Championship wins. Top five wide receivers by overall ranking to start the season. Madden 23. That would be cool.

Five contestants to appear on the most seasons of the challenge. Seven countries with the most Olympic medals. Whoa. This is cool. This is a good one. This is a really good one. Okay, KB, you're up first. Lesbian. Carrie.

I don't know. Every rally is just going to be jam-packed with Subarus, dude. It can be Justin Jefferson. Oh, no. Subaru. Oh. What?

Is he not even a 95? How? That's his spelling it wrong, maybe. Maybe just put Jefferson. Delete Justin. I mean, we can't kick you out on the first one. Dude, that's... Are you guys saying he definitely is?

100%. He definitely is. Give us another receiver. He should be. That's just... Okay, this is just... Those are the top five. Yeah, not top five.

He's been saying no. Number one. He's been saying no. Number one. You've been saying no. No. I think Madden and Fantasy are a lot different, so. Okay, that's. Who would you pick other than Justin? Who would you pick?

Devontae Adams. Yeah. He's probably a. Damn. Jerry. That's, this is wrong. Sucks, Jerry. It's wrong.

Sorry, you're out. I'm going to go with Forrest Gump. That's just crazy, Jerry. That sucks. Sorry, you're out. I'm going to go with Forrest Gump. That's just crazy, bro. All right. Okay, we'll let you stay in with Devontae Adams, even though it's Chase Pick. All right. Sass.

I'm going to go with Forrest Gump. I didn't know we were getting lifelines here, though. You were mad about that? Oh, no. It's good to know. Saving Private Ryan. Patrick Mahomes. What's that for?

Oh my god. I thought it was just players. Oh. Fuck. That's why the Justin Jefferson is crazy. Oh, my God. Top wide receiver. Sorry, Nick. You're out.

You're out. Wait. You get back in. I'm going to use my lifeline. Tyreek Hill. Eek. No E at the end I'm gonna double down on a receiver too

I know we're getting lifelines BB Don't need a lifeline Ebony Sweep the board, Kate Sweep the board What? Kate, send a text Who you would be very happy about

what from labor in our den explains uh bread record to get to bread record to the waiter waiter face lighting up ah i was there that day let's go is he trying to beat it i love it yeah beef wants to beat it i'll have to go back he's the guy you gotta let beat it? I love it, yeah. Going for it? Beef wants to beat it. I'll have to go back. He's the guy you got to let beat it. That's a man that he wants to house. I'll just go back. Okay, Jerry.

Back in. Milf. Ice. You could have all three of those in one video, which is crazy. I'm going to go with Step Sibling. Is that a genre? Yeah. It has to be.

Now – Oh, that's a tough one to go out on. Yeah. That's a pretty – Oh, sass. It's like the most popular genre. Oh, sass. The category is incest.

Sass. Okay. I'm still in. I'm using my life on it. All right. Use your life on it. Oh, sass. Not incest. Oh, you got to stay in categories. I'm still in. I'm using my life. All right, use your life. Oh, sad. Are you going to stay in categories?

I'm not staying in categories. I'm not staying in categories. That's the rule. No, I do not. Okay. I don't. After this, no more comebacks. Costco?

Costco? Costco? Okay, I think the sixth coach with the most NCAA national championships, I think it's basketball. No, that's not the answer. Yeah, it would have to be basketball. So I think if you want to do Coach K. Oh, I don't even know. I think it might be basketball because Saban has six. Oh, there's no six on there.

Right. There has to be. Probably. Do John Wooden. John Wooden. I think he's the 10. Yeah. All right.

All right. So there you go. Basketball. I gave away something there, but that's fine. I will do seven countries with the most Olympic medals. It could be the United States. If we're not one, yeah. Oh, wow.

Fuck yes. So much better. KB? Fuck. Big tits. Oh, there's no way. Come on. Oh.

Lifeline. Lifeline. Fat tits. I kind of want to say fat tits. Fat tits. Breast implants. Wait, for what? Cosmetic surgery.

That would be one of the two. Okay, Jerry. I'll do Italian dressing. Ooh. Italian dressing. Ooh. Italian porn. I love the Italian market taking over the Japanese market. Maybe you don't put dressing. I don't know.

I don't know. That would be top five. Yeah, I don't think so, Jerry. Wow, really? Okay. Wow, I would have given it a five for sure. That's our first out. I'm going to go Caesar.

Ooh. That'll probably be up there. Nice. Coach K. I don't know if you don't have to. Try Coach K. Try Coach K. Just put Mike.

Whoa. There you go. Go Lips. You got it. Is that for porn? I don't know if that's a cosmetic surgery Oh That's everybody gets their lips

That's Botox That's a cosmetic surgery is it not? Fillers See you Nikki See you Nikki I'm looking at the answer Okay Me and Sass

Ranch the answer. Yeah, I'm just making sure. Okay. It'd be me and Sass. Ranch. Fuck. Wait, why didn't I use my second lifeline? I'm going to go Canada. I don't know, Sass. All right, I'm out. Wait, for the challenge?

Countries with most Olympic medals? Oh. Let's go with Roy Williams. My eyes got worse every break. Russia. Let's go, KB. Oh. What? Maybe U.S. I guess I, KB. Oh. What?

Maybe U.S. I guess I can't. Bobby Knight. Damn it. That's crazy. Who are the Johnny Bananas? No. I thought that said continents. Johnny Bananas is number one.

Yeah. Okay, you can show it. I won. Damn it. Transgender. Wow. I over pogs, over juicy Asians. I don't think I've ever watched it.

Okay. You may not have even known it. I want to do another one. Okay. Wait a second. What are the countries? Russia is not in the top. That was a great sport. I want to do another one. Okay. Wait a second. What are the countries? Russia is not in the top? That was a great sport.

Russia is not in the top? They get some taken away or something? Yeah, it might be split up. From the USSR? Still, you would still think. You'd still think. I don't think so because they're not great in either. Yeah.

Right? I think they always are in the top of the medals right or no maybe not china definitely is yeah now huh okay let's do another blue cheese salad yeah i can't believe italian isn't tough yeah it's weird pisses me off all right one husband of sarah michelle geller one nba player that jim that Jimmy Kimmel wore blackface to impersonate on the man show. Four New York Yankees, core four players, five rings. Six schedule one drugs, USDA drug schedule,

five U.S. permanently inhabited territories, six actors to play the Joker in films, seven dwarfs from Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, Eight Planets, Ten NBA Teams That Have Never Won a Championship, Eleven Top Keyword Search on Google Worldwide 2022. Let's not do the planets. Do we all agree? No planets.

No planets. Alright, I'll go first. Carl Malone. I think Freddie Prince Jr. is married to Sarah Michelle Gellar. Oh. What's the name of the woman who is sex in the city? Oh, that's. Oh, I'm wrong.

Yeah. That's Sarah what? Jessica Parker. Jessica Parker. She's married to... Maybe I'm wrong. She's married to Ferris Bueller. Broderick.

Who killed the person. We're driving on the wrong side of the road. Don't forget. Go ahead, KB. For New York Yankees, core. It's got to be Jeter. Jeter, yeah. Jerry?

What is the drug one? Schedule one is the worst drugs. I'd go crystal meth. Yep. I'm going to go Koala. Heath Ledger. I'll go with Bernie Williams. What?

Is he not core four? Oh, no. Out. Sorry. Whoa. Bye. I have other ones to go. Bye.

I'll go Jared Leto. Oh, he's not. Fuck. I know who it is. Fuck. Fuck. B? Heroin.

Bernie Williams should be core four, TJ. You know that. Well, no, it's drafted. I know. I fucked that up. You want me? Yeah. Crack cocaine? Or know what I mean? Yeah. Crack cocaine?

Or crack? Or cocaine? Whatever. I don't think it is. Wow. Huh. Ah. I'm going to go with Joaquin Phoenix.

I'll go Jack Nicholson. Hmm. I don't have any more after that. Uh, Dopey. Um. I'm going to go with Xanax. I know that's legal, so it definitely wouldn't be that. It's two A's.

I hope it's X-A-N-A-X. Palindrome. Yeah. Umie? Sleepy. I'll be sleepy. I can't remember any of them. Guam

The Thunder What? What? Have never won an NBA championship, right? They never won Is that what it says? 10 NBA teams that have never won an NBA championship? They're not on the list.

Oh. They win? No. Did Seattle? Oh. The Sonics doesn't count. That shouldn't count. Kyle, for the win.

11 to run. Pop. 10 NBA teams never won a championship Hornets I forgot that weed is a schedule 1 drug Wait weed is? Yeah Grizzlies

COVID Pacers It's pretty much just all drugs that have no... What are the core four? Jorge Posada, Derek Jeter... Mariano Rivera. Mariano Rivera and Pettit? Yeah.

Shit. The four that won in 2009, basically. Who are the other Jokers? The new guy. Oh, yeah. Forgot Bernie was gone. The new Joker? Yeah.

Yeah. Joaquin? Oh, no. The new one from the Batman at the end of it in the jail cell. Oh, shit. Yeah, I don't know. Oh, yeah, he's really good. He was awesome in Banshees.

Peyote. Peyote? Peyote. Peyote. LSD. Peyote. By the way, I've become a Mezcal guy now. Well, I can't do it.

It's too smoky. I drink it every time I go to a restaurant. Good on you. I can't do it. I like it. I like the smoke. All right, I'm out tomorrow, but I'm back for the rest of the week. All right, I'm out Friday.

I'm out Thursday, Friday. Oh, we're out tomorrow. And we're out tomorrow. Jesus Christ. Wait, you guys are out tomorrow? Yeah, we got to film. So are we not doing a show? Celeb coming in.

No, you're doing a show. Sass, you're doing a show. It's going to be me. Do an hour. Do your clean hour. No. No, Che. You'll find someone Sass, you're doing a show. She's going to be me. Do an hour. Do your clean hour. No. No, Che. You'll find someone.

Get Tommy in here. All right. You're going to find some people, right? Yeah. Wait, what are you guys doing tomorrow? We have to film with a guy coming in for a documentary. Yeah. Monkey Boy.

Oh, nice. Coming in. Nice. Excited, excited. Jerry, thank you as always. Yep. It's been a pleasure. Can't wait for your campaign.

All right. See you tomorrow. excited. Jerry, thank you as always. Your pleasure. Can't wait for your campaign. Alright, see you every tomorrow. Happy birthday, Adam Sharon. happy birthday adam sharon and everybody that i missed over the last week see you tomorrow