The Yak - Case Race Part 3: Shane Gillis Seeks Case Race Redemption | The Yak 1-27-23

Episode Date: January 27, 2023

Love you all #10xYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak

Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. And now, here they are, the thirstiest group of riffin' racers to ever grow their guts in the Yak Case Race, competing for the title of the Yak's fastest racer. Cars are approaching the starting line. First is the Speed Demon, driven by Roan, KB, and Kate. Oh, Speed Demon, Speed Demon. Next is Zaz, Nick, and Big Cat in the stolen Batmobile.

I'm the Joker, baby. Right behind is Shane, Jay, and Brandon in the fast banana. Holy, I could gamble half as good as I can eat bananas. And sneaking along last with those double-dealing-like KKs is TJ and Zaz in the birthday belly buster. And away they go on the Yacht Case Race. Holy shit. That was awesome.

That was awesome. Who created that? Tech team. Wow, tech team. Will Sparks. Fuck, and Connor's voice is so good. It's buttery. Wow, tech team. Will Sparks. Fuck, and Connor's voice is so good. It's buttery. Wow, all right, welcome in.

Yak case race, number... Three. Three. Good vibes. Great vibes only. Great vibes. Let's start. Happy birthday, KB.

Happy birthday, KB. Happy birthday, TJ. TJ. Everyone has a cake. Happy birthday, big cat. Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you. Everyone has a cake. Happy birthday, big cat. Oh, thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Everyone has a cupcake.

This doesn't count. So we'll eat the cupcake now in honor of everyone's birthday, and then we'll talk about everything and get ourselves set. So cheers. Yeah. It's yours. And we're sure this one doesn't count. That was an attack.

No, it wasn't. I just saw the empty thing, and I was like, holy shit. That was an attack, dude. He attacked already. Already? Can the empty thing, and I was like, holy shit. That was an attack, dude. He attacked already. Already? Did you say you already finished yours? I thought you already ate yours. All I saw was the wrapper, and I was like, holy shit.

That's an attack right away. I think he looks skinny. I think you remember that. That voice is Shane Gillis. He's back. Fan favorite. Fan favorite. Back, baby.

Back by popular demand. No, this is going to be great. Shane's redemption case race I never put Blame on Shane We did a terrible job as a host It was Kyle's fault 80 scholarship

For football How many does baseball have Shane did say Kyle are you going to attack me this time He's like maybe Save it for the show Now we'll find out I'm excited Shane Shane did say, Kyle, are you going to attack me this time? He's like, maybe. Save it for the show. Now we'll find out.

No, but I'm excited, Shane. I actually think it's a testament to Shane for even being back here, because if I were you, I would never come back. Anything like this. That was one of the better nights I've had in a long time. Yeah, a rough night. Next day, yeah. The night was fun.

Next day was tough. I didn't think it was as bad as the comments. Yeah. Never is. Yeah, we laughed about it the next day. I thought it was great. Yeah. Oh, that's funny. And then the internet kind of made up their own mind.

I was talking to Big Cat. Big Cat was like, dude, everybody's melting down. They're so embarrassed. I was like, fucking pussies. Yeah. Then I looked at the fucking comments. I was like, dude, I'm never drinking again. They're right.

I'm a loser. You also did Andrew Yang's podcast. Next day, yeah. I watched that, and I could see in your eyes, like, I know what he was. There was still some paint on you. Yeah, a little paint. His face was dark red.

But yeah, no, this is, I think we all have to remember that the comments should not count for whatever gets posted tomorrow because we are getting drunk and making ourselves look terrible on air. Basically put a jersey on. Put a jersey on, then criticize. Have we ever answered why we're doing this?

We're just doing it. It's our birthdays. It's your birthdays. Yeah. All right. Brandon, nice face paint. What are you supposed to be? I'm a cat.

Brandon, you look like fucking crazy right now. I'm a cat. I have the best face paint in here. You look like a geisha. It looks like you went first and she ran out of face paint for the rest of us. I went fourth and I went in with a plan. I said, make me a cat from cats, not just a cat like Stephen Jay. Did she take a picture of you guys?

Oh, no. She took a picture of me, yes. She took a picture of me. Hiko took a picture of me. She took a bunch of mine and she did mine way better than yours. Yours is so good. On everyone. Yeah, yours is so good.

Realistic flowers on you. Her son is a wrestler, high school wrestler. That's why she wanted to take a picture? Scholarship? Yeah, probably not on pace. How good he does. True, true, true. A.B., what do you got in front of you?

What are those? I brought some shroom chocolates. I don't know. I think T.J.'s probably not going to like that. They're the legal kind, right? Oh, they're the legal kind. Yeah, I got it from a store. We're good.

I don't know if I'm going to do them. If I get bored, then maybe. Right. Right, so KB doesn't drink, and Brandon Walker, like, fake doesn't drink, but he is going to be drinking today. A little bit? I might get two in me. Okay.

You only drink when you're at Twin Brothers. My team expects two brothers. My team expects two out of me. Okay. You only drink when you're at Twin Brothers. My team expects two brothers. My team expects two out of me. Okay. Do whatever you gotta do. Do two. Yeah, so the teams are Brandon, Shane, Che, Kate, Roan, KB, and then me, Nick, and Sass, and KB's not drinking.

Yep. Brandon's only drinking two, and every team has to finish a case and 16 cupcakes. I'd like to point out that Che and Shane have been nauseatingly nice to each other, and I didn't really like it so far. Yeah, we heard you guys were kind of sucking each other off on the text chain. I thought it was just absolutely

normal, friendly stuff. So did I. It was honestly nothing crazy. The fact that Brandon is blowing this out of proportion is a little wild. Oh, now you're not going to turn on me right before the start. You just turned on us, you dumbass. I didn't turn on you. God damn it. I'm reporting.

I'm reporting stuff from the group text. Let me see. Look at the clock. 6.45. You're going to hate Che again. 6.45. We'll put that out there. You're going to try it, dude.

Never going to happen. No, they're boys now. Yeah. We were boys. We were friends that night. Yeah. Can confirm. They're buddies.

Unturnable. But Brandon, are you going to drink tonight, or what's your... I'm going to drink about two, maybe four. Two to night. Yeah. Can confirm. They're buddies. Unturnable. But Brandon, are you going to drink tonight or what's your... I'm going to drink about two, maybe four. Two to four. Okay. Two to four beers, ten cupcakes. I'll say those cupcakes went down really easily. Yeah, those are delicious.

Yeah, but then there's six delicious cupcakes. I think I could do 16 straight. All right. Okay, go ahead. That's fine. Do it. I'm lying. You can.

I don't. All right, so the cupcakes. So 16 cupcakes a team. We also have a couple cupcakes are landmines. So what did we put under them again? There's post-it notes underneath, I think, 10 of them total. Some of them are decoy post-it notes, though, so you can't look and find one and not take it.

And what's under the other ones? There's one that says wet. There's one that says wheel. There's one that says every other There's one that says wheel. There's one that says every other team stops drinking for a minute. There's one that says every other team stops drinking for two minutes. There's solo

karaoke. And then there's replace a beer with the Zaw beer. The Zaw beer is right there. That's the Zaw beer. Oh my god. It looks like chocolate milk. It looks like stomachir. It looks like chocolate milk. It looks like stomach fat. It looks like a bag of lipo.

We're lipo. What's going to be on the wheel if someone gets the wheel? Should we decide that right now? I think that person could be done. We should all add something to the wheel. Oh, yeah. We should all add our own thing to the wheel.

Everyone gets one little slice. Are these helium balloons? I don't think so. Judging by the placement on the floor, I would say no. She's a panda, baby. She's breaking a mask. It's just going to be somebody else's breath

you're about to inhale. You think so? Yeah, definitely. TJ's breath.'re about to inhale. You think so? Yeah, definitely. TJ's breath. Oh, my God. What the fuck? Is it someone's breath? That's always funny.

Holy fuck. I'm an idiot. I was like, whoa. Let's do some more helium balloons. That's fucking crazy. Oh, you want some? No. I'm an idiot. I was like, whoa! Let's do some more helium balloons. That's fucking crazy. Oh, you want some? No.

I do, I do, I do, I do. I'm afraid of that shit. Really? I've never done it. What's there to be afraid of? Where's it cut from? All right. That's a big hit. Fuck yeah.

Wait, nothing changed. This is just how I sound. Fuck. All right, so should we make a wheel real quick before we start? Yeah. Yeah. Boys, just crack a beer. Come on.

Yeah, I want to get it. We're going to. We're going to. Come on, bro. Let's go. Come on. All right, so add something, Roan. 10 push-ups, 10 sit-ups, and ten dips.

Ten, ten, ten. I can't do ten dips now. I can't do ten of any of those. It doesn't have to be consecutive. Four six-milligram zins. Oh, God. Four? I thought this was good vibes.

Let's have friendly things. Why don't we compliment a friend? Hug thought this was good vibes. Let's have friendly things. Oh, yeah. Why don't we do a compliment of friends? Oh, yeah. Hug somebody from the other team. We actually did compliment. Be nice. We did compliment a minute on this show a month ago, and it was the worst experience we all went through.

We had to earnestly give each other compliments for a minute, eye to eye, and it was way worse than. I never actually got my compliment on the air. You did. We had technical difficulties. You took the mic down so nobody could hear what he said. Alright, so compliment someone? I look stupid. Yeah.

Out of everyone. You look like you're on the wrong side of history. Oh. I like that. Let's go. Saz on my side Zaza yeah Zaza the Russians

yeah we're rooting for Putin how about one helium balloon I'm gonna do light as a feather stiff as a board still what is that that's a sleepover game that I played in middle school

where one person has to lay down and the rest of us have to lift them above our heads with just two fingers okay does that work with how many people all rest of us have to lift them above our heads with just two fingers. Okay.

Does that work with how many people? All of us would have to do it to every person. Yeah, it works. I like that. Put that on twice. Yeah, put that on there twice. It was that or fart eliminator again. Oh, no.

Can't do it. All right, yeah, dude, put that on twice. Maybe like buy a nice pair of shoes. Buy a nice pair of shoes. For someone with a bad pair of shoes. Buy a nice pair of shoes. For someone with a bad pair of shoes. So for you, Sass. Let's see the inside of their shoes again, brother. People were pretty mean to you about that. Somehow people were furious about that.

Let's show Shane. About you having old shoes. Then just do one spin again. Sass literally doesn't care about anything. Yeah. All right. What's this for? If you doesn't care about anything. Yeah. All right. Now, what's this for? If you get the cupcake.

Oh, okay. I see. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Great. There's only one, though, right? There's only one. There's only one. That's great.

This might not even happen. Yeah. Probably won't. Might not even happen. You'll probably have to get new shoes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, you don't.

You're not going to be eating many cupcakes. You buy yourself the shoes or somebody else the shoes? So you don't even have to worry about the cupcakes. Cupcakes were fucking good, though. Yeah, they were. I like how cold they were. Yeah, I like the cold. Okay.

Me and Pat Bev just split a bottle of wine, by the way, so I feel like I'm swinging it with a donut right now. Shut up. You're already drunk? Well, half a bottle of machete. It was red wine. Yeah, a little bit. I see it.

Oh, I like that for us. You're already loosened up. You're ready to go. Yeah, that's a good spin on it. That's positive. All right. It'll be fine. All right.

Yeah, you're nervous, huh, Sas? I'm very nervous. I'm very anxious. Just the PEDs talking, brother? Might be the PEDs talking. My asshole is in a puddle right now. Are you nervous you're going to talk too much? It's everything.

But it'll be fun. I'm excited. Yeah. It'll be a good time. No one's going to hate on you. No. Yeah. Good.

I don't like the looks I'm getting from the booth at all. You look like a fool. You're staring me in the eye. All right, so let's spin the regular wheel and then we'll start. Get this out of the way.

Yeah, get it out of the way. You got to do that today too? Yeah, it's a Friday show. Oh, that's right. What's up, brother? What's up, brother? These guys are watching us. What are these guys doing?

How you doing? Yo. Want to tip them? This is a normal thing to say. You want to tip them? All right. All right. We're good. All right.

All right. All right. All right. All right. All right. All right. All right. All right.

All right. All right. All right. No problem. No problem. All right. So should we start. All right. No problem. No problem. All right. So should we start? Yeah, I think so.

DJ, what do you need to know from us for scorekeeping situations? Anything? I just need you to tell me when you finish one. Okay. How long did the last one take? Because I feel like the last one was a little bit too fast. Too fast. That's what the cupcakes are.

That's all you have cupcakes. Shane, do you have any obligations tomorrow? Actually, yeah, tomorrow. Any presidential candidates to talk to? No, no. Yeah, I mean, it's also about what happens after the case race. But yeah, it was a little too fast. That's why I just hope it, yeah, yeah.

I don't know. We're going to lose if we try and go too fast. Let's just have fun. Let's just have a bunch of fun. I was going to chug my first beer. Are you saying I can't do that now? Let's enjoy each other. No, you can't do that.

Why not? I wanted to just I've been looking forward to this. I'm trying to slow him down. You can chug your fifth beer. Let me chug my first beer. There's no, we don't have to implement rules.

Shane, you're going to chug your first beer. I can, yeah, we can do whatever. We'll do it together. We can have fun. It's your birthday, dude. Right, right. Should we go through the odds?

Let's chug the first beer. Yeah. One from each team? Yeah. It worked for me well last time. I might even chug the first beer. One from each team? Yeah. It worked for me well last time. I might even chug the second beer. Here we fucking go. Chug 20 fucking beers.

I'm leaning in. Steven, get in here, you motherfucker. Bro, they gave Steven face paint that makes him a little bit more Asian looking. Yeah. Just gets a little bit more Asian. A little Bengal tiger. Some shit like that, bro. A little bit more. TJ and Zara,

are you guys going to drink? Share convo. Yeah, it's my birthday. Oh, fuck yes. Alright. Happy birthday, TJ. Thanks. You actually have the best job because you don't, you can drink for fun. Right. And not. We're all drinking for fun. Yeah, we are. We're all just going to have a good time. Right. And not. We're all drinking for fun. Yeah, we are. We're all just going to have a good time. You keep saying that.

You're fucked, dude. I can tell you're fucked. I'm having a blast. So when you finish, so to get a cupcake, you got to go up and get your singular cupcake, sit down, eat it, and then get back up. And when you finish a cupcake or beer, just make sure TJ knows. Can I have a beer and a cupcake at the same time? Can I be?

Okay. Okay. Alright, so let's just fill up our beers and get ready. Hey, Kate, don't worry about the cupcakes. I'm going to start with the cupcakes. Okay. If you guys need to, I'll let you know. Let's put a dent in the beers. Okay. Unless you want to. I just thought I would slowly nibble one over time. I got a beer to sit on right now to try and incubate like

a mother hen and then another goodbye KB KB you can put up 16 of these motherfuckers bro you easily could put up 16 cupcakes and us doing 12 beers will be the hard part I don't want a bonus cupcake just to be able to

nosh on without it counting towards because they were good and tiny. Ron is drunk. What the fuck? Ron's already drunk. Bad idea, dude.

Last time I came in I was off a bottle and a bean last time. Were you off a bean? That 93 octane. That Perk 90. You were off the Perk 90 Maybe you're already going

These dummy ones bring Oh what Great pour by Nick So far So I had to transfer cups Okay I put it in the Stella Blue cup Oh he

Oh KB Are we doing like a grand start Yeah Sorry my bad Cheers My bad my bad You just have to have an extra half Yeah

Throw that out No no no no no no Start again No no no no no No no no no no no no Throw it again No no no no no no No no no no no no You're good bro Don't listen to their toxicity

That's a little Steven just gave you a What Steve? Throw it out? False start Oh my god No dude No I'm just kidding

It's your birthday It's your birthday It's your birthday Stop stop Don't listen to him No no no No you're on our team Don't have an extra cupcake for nothing.

You're such a pussy, Jay. You got to get your cupcake. On his birthday. I said it was fine. Grab one from, oh yeah, wherever. I really just wanted to. Hopefully there's no post-it. All right.

So KB's at nearly two cupcakes, but we haven't started yet. Haven't started. Okay. Okay. Oh yeah. Is everyone ready? All right. You got a countdown or something, TJ, you want to do?

Nothing special? Or do we sing happy birthday? Let's start at 6.02. All right. Yeah, start at 6.02, 30 seconds. We're all going to have fun. Just fun. It's going to be fun.

This is just guys having fun. Let's have fun. Kate. And Kate. And Kate. We'll have fun, too. Sorry, we forget sometimes, too. Pat Bev also wanted to thank you for your service.

Oh, thank you. Yeah, he wanted to do that. Very nice. He thought that would be flattering. That was flattering. Do you want a gentleman to start you for your service. Oh, thank you. Yeah, he wanted to do that. Very nice. He thought that would be flattering. That was flattering. Do you want a gentleman to start your engine? Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, let's do that. Yeah. Let's wait another minute. One more. I now pronounce you Chuck and Larry. All right. I just got three things to say. God bless our troops.

Yeah. God bless America. Yeah. God bless America. Yeah. And gentlemen, start your engines! All right. Cheers. Cheers. Happy birthday, KB and TK.

Thank you. Let's go. Woo! One beer. God damn. Oh, my. They're so cold. I wanted to chug the first.

That was your plan? I was just doing that because I wanted to chug the first. Very cold. It's cold. That's a problem. One beer. Oh, my. They're so cold. I wanted to chug the first. That was your plan? I was just doing that because I wanted to chug the first. Very cold. It's cold. That's a problem. One cupcake. Roan, I heard some rumors. Did you put Pat Bev on to tungsten?

One beer. He asked about it. Oh, yeah? He was curious about the tungsten block. He said he wants to get a 50-pound cube for his house and have it spinning on its axis, like its diagonal axis. Did you see this place makes tungsten tops that spin for up to three minutes? Yeah, that's one cupcake.

Kate, want to throw the paper towels over here? They're right next to you. No, no, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't. Actually, no, I don't, Sass, sorry. What the fuck, man? Not even for me, for another team. We're on a team together. Yeah, we're For another team. We're on a team together. Yeah, we're just being pals.

We're on a team together. This is how the hostilities start, dude. I got fucking black makeup going into my fucking mouth, dude. It is pulling up around your lip. Okay, two cupcakes. Oh, wow. Two cupcakes. Oh, boy.

Cupcakes might be a mistake. Brandon's going hard. I'll have to sit on this beer to warm it up. How many you've had, KB? One cupcake. I'm not trying to be a hero early. You've I'm about to sit on this beer to warm it up How many you've had KB? One cupcake I'm not trying to be a hero early Gotta ease into it Fuck

Okay Also I had a beer I don't know if that was Yeah Shane had a beer You guys want to pull up the Sam McGuffey highlights now? No I don't even remember that That's how excited I just was

What is that? Oh you guys know Sam? I don't remember Did we watch it last time? I don't remember the latter half Are's how excited I just was. What is that? Oh, you guys know Sam? I don't remember. Did we watch it last time? I don't remember the latter half. Are these things on the top edible? Yes. They didn't feel like it. Yeah, they are.

I've eaten all of them. Yes, it's sugar. It's the sugar paper. It's sugar paper. Oh, my God, Brandon. Be careful, Brandon. This is how a race starts. See, Brandon's looking to see.

It's okay. Okay. All right. Get in the first cupcakes. All right. One done first cupcakes. All right. One done for me. All right. So two beers for us.

I'm just having a good time. I think we got to keep our cupcakes at zero for as long as possible. Yeah. We're going to have all of our beers. It's like, where are we in the race? We have no idea. I got one beer. Third for us, please.

You're having side cupcakes? Shane just put down a cupcake. Cupcake. Let's go. I think that's a mistake. Kyle, you think you can do 16? Right now, no, but we'll see. Okay, that's bad because we need you. You ain't drinking.

Brandon ripping three off Four cupcakes You're so stupid Get that one for the thumb Brandon Put on a show Get that Kobe ring Got the one for the thumb Got a Kobe

R.I.P. way too soon Just totally cut KB's birthday forever Yeah I was drinking alone at the Chelsea Bell You were? Super Bowl week Totally cucked KB's birthday forever. Yeah, I was drinking alone at the Chelsea Bell when that happened. What? Yeah. You were? Far. Super Bowl week. What did you say about Kobe?

I didn't say anything. Did I? Yeah. He did. He did like a sarcastic fucking like, going too soon. Yeah. That's on me. Hey, that's on me, and I apologize.

Did you do a helicopter sound too? I won't cross that line again. Yeah. Bro, I'm just here to have a good time. By the way, shout out TJ. He has our theme. So, TJ, what was your theme? Fortnite?

Fortnite. AB, you were Black Panther, and I was wrestling. No, I'm sorry. No, go ahead. Slow down, brother. Where was this energy last time, dude? I'm off a bean now. You're chugging, bro.

Another beer for us. Two cupcakes. Five cupcakes. Come on now. Brandon, you ever been cupcake sick, brother? Wait. That's not a fun sick.

I'm taking a bunch because it's so cold that I'm having trouble He was born for this. Kyle's got a post-it. I'm literally sitting here. Oh, Kyle got a post-it already? Yeah, this is good.

Is it a fool post-it, though? Yeah, I got a post-it. It might Kyle got a post-it already? Yeah, this is good. Is it a fool post-it, though? Yeah, I got a post-it. It might be a trick post-it. I got to take these mushrooms. You're taking them already? I have to. I'm not going to sit here while you guys get drunk off your... Well, they're legal.

Was this the last... The mushrooms that you took... No, this is chocolate. Is this like the ones you took last time? Are these the same as last time? Yeah, yeah. I don't know. Because if so, I kind of want one.

It's my card. Yeah, go ahead. Take one, Katie. Okay. It's on me card. On me card. Let me post it. What's that?

It's a decoy. It's a decoy. All right. Wait, TJ, I had another beer. Yeah, so we should. So we're at four. That's another beer for us as well. I just had two.

Guys, come on, boys. Why are you doing this? Yeah, yeah, yeah. We don't need you guys' paces. I just want to get to the cupcakes. It's too hot. They were delicious. Yeah.

We'll get there. We're going to get there after we finish beers. Yeah, that's true. I think that's the way to go. My tomato's kind of dripping a little. You can munch as many cupcakes as you want, bro. You got to talk a little. Why? You ain't ripping. You gotta talk a little. Why?

You ain't ripping. I'm the worst one. Why? It is a southern cat full of cupcakes. You look so sassy, too. You look like a sassy little... Hi, y'all. He has so much icing in his throat.

Bread. You're just a jellicle cat. Sex cupcakes. Never mind. You might... Thisellicle cats. Sex cupcakes. Never mind. You might be This kid can eat. Oh my God. He's spry.

He's doing a shuffle. A sugar rush. This might be the best day of his life. All right, KB. Sit right here. What's your trainer going to say, Brandon?

Oh, fuck him. He knows. Are you logging these? Gotta log them. I have to log them. Wait, how much calories in one? Probably a substantial amount. By the way, we're going to log them. How much calories in one? Probably too many.

By the way, we're going to get all the post-it notes on the cupcakes. Yeah, we're fucked. Brandon, take a post-it note. Yeah, that's a good point. Him grabbing all the cupcakes really means he's avoiding the... Why do y'all think I'm doing it? It's not about winning. It's not.

It's about having fun. It's not a product. Also, the cupcakes are going down pretty smooth. Yeah, it feels like they're easy. I'm not trying to eat them that fast. Yeah, I thought you were. You're a beast. Also, the cupcakes are going down pretty smooth. Yeah, it feels like very easy. I'm not trying to eat them that fast. Yeah, I thought you were. You're a beast. You're just a fat ass. What?

What did I bring to the table? Shane, how did the show go? Thank you. The Gillian Keeves. It went well. It was like, I loved it. Everyone should download it. Yeah. Thanks a lot, dude. Gillian Keeves TV. What was the last sketch called? Compliance. That. Thanks a lot, dude. The last sketch. Julian Keeves, TV. What was the last sketch called?

Compliance. That's one of the better sketches. And you can see Francis in some of them. Francis is in a couple, which is very nice. He was saying that he missed the one that he really wanted to be in, and he has major FOMO about. Yeah, I think he was supposed to be in that one. The last one we did. He was supposed to be in the compliance one, right?

I think so. Was he supposed to be Matt? No, Matt was Matt. Matt was perfect for that. Matt was hilarious. Francis was probably supposed to be one? No, Matt was Matt. Matt was perfect for that. Matt was hilarious. Francis was probably supposed to be one of the guys working there. See you, Frank. I wish Francis was here.

I like that guy a lot. Francis is currently searching the New England area for little boys. He is. Yeah, that's right. He is. He truly is. Literally. More girls.

Hey, Jessica back from South Dakota. Couldn't find... On the few. Bad milks. Boys, I don't know what's going on, but I am drunk already. One and three quarters. Sass planned all week to not have this happening.

No, I mean, I'm having fun. TJ, seven cupcakes. TJ, one beer for me. I gotta say, Sass came with me on the road. Last time I was here, I was making fun of him. Yeah. Oh, yeah. He came with me on the road.

What a fucking star, dude. You're gonna be really special someday. Where'd you guys go? What are y'all doing? I'm just as special as you, brother. Oh. You know I respect the hell out of you. You know I love you, dude.

You know I love you. I get happy when I see you. I know. I get happy when I see you. You're funny. I don't know why anyone hates you. I don't know either. But get happy when I see you. I get happy when I see you. You're funny. I don't know why anyone hates you. I don't know either. But I respect them.

Hey, if they hate me, they hate me. Respect the hell out of them. You're only good because of the tough love that Shane gives you, dude. If he stops giving you tough love, you're fucked. So you need him to get in your ass a little bit. Love is love. All I heard is the love. Where'd you guys go on the road?

We went to Buffalo. It was great. Did you guys meet any pro football players? Yeah, we did. Who'd you meet? A couple. Shout out Gabe Davis. Oh, shout out Spencer Brown.

No, we went and hung out with the team after. I'm Sweeney. I've heard you tell the story. You did such a poor job. I did a very bad job. It was unbelievable. To the point that actually like a couple, a month ago we brought this up

and they didn't even know the story. Yeah, no, I don't know the story. Can you tell the better version of it? I'll make it quick, but we got fucked up and went to the game. And then after the game, we went to Josh Allen's for dinner. He had, like, a private bar restaurant. It's the best. Also, so my two openers were him and LaMare Lee.

LaMare is, like, a short, chubby black dude that has autism. Not diagnosed, but, like, clearly. He's, like, an anime black dude that has autism. Not diagnosed, but clearly. He's like an anime black dude. He loves, yeah. Video games. You know what he actually loves? He loves Brandon. Yeah, because of wrestling.

He loves you, Brandon. Oh, okay. Well, that got good. Yeah, Chuckle would help instead of me saying anime. Anime black dude and everyone just like. I thought it was clinical. He's been diagnosed as an anime black dude. The doctor's like, so you like anime. Okay. No, we're sitting there and I think he, I think, so it's me, LaMare, and Sass.

And LaMare's sitting across from me and Gabe Davis. And he's sitting next to, I think it was Isaiah McKenzie. And he was just sitting there and he's like, other than being black, what do you think you and I have in common? This dude was like, what? This is like. This is like. Who the fuck is this guy? It's like me.

This is like it's me and Shane sitting next to each other. LaMare's across from us. And this guy is blatantly turned like the other direction. Like stop. Oh, no. Not trying to talk to us. And he's like tapping him on the shoulder. Wait, give him the other one. Give him the other one. So stop. Oh no. Not trying to talk to us. And he's like tapping him on the shoulder. Wait give him the other one.

Give him the other one. So that was just an insane question. The guy was like who is this? He literally said whose man is this? How did this guy get in here? And then he goes what do you search on YouTube? And he was just like. That's a good question.

It was actually a good question. Ken kind of knows a lot about something. What's your guy's answer? There's no doubt it's a good question Ken kind of knows a lot about something What's your guys answer? There's no doubt it's a good question Tsunamis I got really big into boat launches I'm really big into the making of aquariums Aquascapes

You search Super Nintendo? It was Josh there He was there He's the best He was like the team dinner He was just being nice He's like a Oh yeah he was there He's the best He's the best It was like the team dinner Yeah Yeah he was just being nice He's like a normal dude

Everyone was great Yeah No there Something about the Bills too Like cause it's the town The town I will say I went So when I

So I went to Buffalo Like a couple Like in December And uh I didn't realize how like Much of like a Oh I had a beer Another beer too for me TJ

Yeah TJ another beer for us And we went We got a ride back I've had two total much of like a... Oh, I had a beer. Another beer, too, for me, TJ. TJ, another beer for us. We got a ride back. I've had two total. When we got a ride. Take it easy. Nice and east. Take it east. Take it east.

What beers are we? TJ, nine cupcakes. We should be at. Oh, my God. Three. I've had two. I just finished my second. I can't even shit on it because it's so impressive.

We should be at six? We should be at six. I had three or four. I can't even shit on it because it's so impressive. We should be at six? We should be at six. You don't do that, bro. I had three or four. How many count empties? This is already way better vibes. I'll be the first to say it. Can I be the first to say I fucking love you guys?

You're so good at stand-up. Hey, man. That's what you think. That's your opinion. No, I think you're very good. Nine empty cans, three in the cup, so six. Anyway, we go to this after party at Dave & Buster's.

The after party was at Dave & Buster's? Old Dave & Buster's. They rented it out, he said. That's a great after party. Holy shit, that's the party. It really is. It was incredible. It was the players and then we were full on dinner for schmucks, dude. It was three... Fuck you, Sass. You did not tell this story.

I told this story. This is the best night ever. I just did a bad job. He just said he went to Dave and Buster's. He didn't say the Bills were there. You went to a Bills game, Josh Allen's bar, and then the after party was Dave and Buster's. This is literally like a dream night. And then, yeah, Gabe was driving us.

Gabe Davis, who went off for like 190 touchdowns that day, was driving me, Sass, and LeMaire around. So this LeMaire guy, how did he do? LeMaire's incredible. I love this. He's a funny guy. They gave him a Bills hoodie that was like a 3X Bills hoodie

that he hasn't taken off. He wears it every day. He was like, I love the Buffalo Bills so much. He loves the Bills. And the entire team, like LeMaire left an anime hoodie at Gabe Davis' house. Gabe Davis wore it before a game. No way. In the tunnel?

Walk was an anime hoodie. LeMaire's anime hoodie. I didn't even know that. Oh, that's so awesome. That's so fire. Dude, I FaceTimed with you guys that weekend, and you put me on the FaceTime with LeMaire, and he was like,

you look like a little-ass fucking boy. LeMaire said that? I don't remember that at all. That is like the best. You look like a little fucking boy. I'm mad at you. It was like one of the craziest weeks. This is where he left out.

So those two, the Bills are all obviously they're kids. Everybody that plays football is like, piss. That was the part that blew me away. They were playing video games. They loved all the games. I was on Mushrooms watching, like, giant – like, watching Spencer Brown, the right tackle, play, like, touching – Have a video.

Touch the lights. I was like, dude, I can't be here. This is the funniest shit I've ever seen. You were also on Mushrooms. Yeah, Mushrooms was a lot. And then – But then Sass approaches. Dude, there's a Star Wars game with fucking, like, a pull-down VR Star Wars game. And me and Gabe are standing there. We watch Sass come, dude, there's a Star Wars game with fucking like a pull-down VR Star Wars game.

And me and Gabe are standing there. We watch Sass come over towards it. I was like, dude, no way he's going to do this right now. No way in front of all these people he's going to play fucking VR Star Wars. Dude, it comes down from the ceiling. And you said it was the players, but also like the honeys. There were some babes there. There was about 50 babes.

Exactly 50 were in babes. Wait. Exactly 50 were- Yeah. Ordered. 50 ordered babes. 50 ordered babes. Ask one name and this is not, don't be like, oh, you're so horny. Was Rachel Bush there?

I'm not sure who that is. Jordan Poirier. Jordan Poirier's girl. Oh, no. No, I don't think this was a babe. This was a fellas only hired woman. This was a bros and hired babes. And other babes. And other babes.

Hired babes. Oh. Even better. Working babes. What did you call them? The one thing better. Cardi Buffaloes? Yeah.

It all looked like Cardi B from Buffalo. Girlfriend, wife, hired babes. That's the echelon. It was hired babes, which was very funny to watch Josh Allen. As soon as the hired babes walked in, he was just like, you boys have fun? Yeah. What the fuck? He's a quarterback.

He's got to do that. Pretty impressive. Brandon, you're at 10 cupcakes. I have? He's a quarterback. He's got to do that. Brandon, you're at 10 cupcakes? I have eaten 10 cupcakes in 15 minutes. This is insane. Can you count? That team is not fair. I'm just feeling it. I told you I'd do 10. I'm going to chill.

I think I'm on... I had one. There's 10 cans on the ground. That's three in the cups and not a seven. This is my third beer. Jesus, guys. More beers than me. I once, in Chicago, we were-

I could have 10 more. Go off. So we played TBT, the basketball tournament, the second year. We had a barstool team the first year. Second year, we didn't do it. But I knew all the guys. So the tournament was in Chicago. And all the guys we like went and hung out we're at joe kim noah's place and he didn't he wasn't there it was his penthouse and one of the guys is like yo what should we do

tonight and he's like just stay at my place like i'll take care of it. Half hour later, 15 hired babes show up. Hired babes. It's like, what the fuck? Love the hired babes. Who reaches out to the babes? We hire some babes right now. I'm feeling we should. Why shouldn't we hire babes?

Hire babes. Hire a couple babes. Kate tried that once. Don't do it. Don't do it. Kate did do that. It's just hired babes. It's like, all right.

You know how uncomfortable all of us would be with hired babes? No, Kate. Oh, dude. I'm not allowed to be uncomfortable. That is bad. I've been more uncomfortable. I was sitting there like, hello, how are you?

Yeah, wait, how are you good with hired babes? No, I'm terrible. How is one who is good with hired babes? You've got to be like a weird pervert. You've got to grab them and fucking... For real. Do you just like tussle them? Really?

Shake them around. You ever go to a strip club with a minority? No. That's fucking different Yeah Never have And fight with With a minority We had a hired babe

We had a hired babe in the studio Big Head was forcing her to give me a lap dance Well you're being a pussy And I was saying absolutely not It's 1pm on like a Monday I'm dead sober I'm so sorry. Hell no.

And she's grabbing at my legs, trying to move my leg away. And then I ran out of the room. Everyone called me a pussy. Ran out of the room? I ran out of the room. I did a spin move, I think, on the way out. They were.

Roan actually had the greatest remember. And they were all right. Roan was like, what did you even say? I don't even remember, but I just... You were like, I got to take a phone call, and then Roan just never came back. Yeah, that was a problem. Well, that was because you're...

I'm a married man. Can't be around the pros. I'm about to be around a pro woman, a professional woman. Titties in my face? No. The boys were so pissed at you guys for not... Yeah, they're like,

you're not fondling the girl. I was so glad I was out of the office because I would have done the same. No, I would have fucked her. If I were there, I would have fucked her. What would you have done? Then wait. The best part of the story. Turning down a free lap dance?

How, man? You guys don't know this. They were coming up with, they were like, he's gay for sure. I was like, no, I don't want to get a lap dance in front of 10,000 people. You guys know this part of the story? No. Kate, so it was for the merch of Palooza to win what? 10 grand?

10 grand. So if I sold, like whatever content person sold the most merch got 10 grand. Just no questions asked here is 10 grand. And so as a joke, I brought this lady dancer in here on the yak to hold up a sign. Oh. Dancer. Oh. Sorry, I forgot that.

That's our one note. I said, I was like, she doesn't have to dress crazy. It doesn't have to be anything crazy. And this stripper company I called was like, no problem. She comes in here. I mean, her whole pussy was out.

Like, I mean, it was. It was. It was aggressive. Like, I was shocked. Like, everything. That's what she said, that her pussy was out. Anyway.

Anyway. She's a beautiful girl. Beautiful. Beautiful. But I was like. Her whole pussy's out. I was sitting on the thing. I was like, if I win this thing thing you're getting all the money it's all going oh no i was like having so much fun with it you guys don't know this no then like paytor in full gave her a great

tip whatever and then afterwards when i actually won because i didn't really think i was gonna win i won and i was like oh fuck and the shitty part of me was like oh no am i really gonna have to pay her that 10 grand but i didn't have the guys wouldn't give me her contact info of me was like, oh, no, am I really going to have to pay her that $10,000? But I didn't have, the guys wouldn't give me her contact info. And I was like, I don't want to give her handlers the $10,000 because whatever. And then I just never heard from them. Her handlers? I don't know what you say. I don't want to give.

So how many months ago was that? It was like three months ago. And so at this point, and I made this giant donation to like this women's shelter in Patterson, New Jersey because I felt so guilty. I donated like two and a half grand. I felt so guilty. You might as well flush the money down the toilet.

I know. Shout out Oasis. You guys are great. Anyway, and then out of the blue last week, I started getting all these phone calls. My phone started blowing up and it was her.

She was like, it's me, Majestic. I'm getting a new couch. That was the thing. She needed a new couch. She hit her up out of nowhere. How do only you know this? Because Kate texted me and was like, what should I do? And I was like, listen up.

She was asking for money. Can you go to Ashley Furniture? I was like, I will help you if they're actually trying to bang down your door. And I said, no, I did this to myself. And so we settled. We settled on a good word. I'm not the first person to get fucked up and promise a stripper.

That's true. That's true. This is crazy. I'm going to buy you a sectional couch. It's just crazy. I did. I did. It's crazy.

Three months. Three months passed. Have I ever told you guys about when I went to a strip club On my 21st birthday And I went and I asked the stripper That was dancing for a lap dance And she pulled me aside and she made me collect All the money with her So I'm like on the stage like scooping up ones

And everyone's watching It was mortifying That is horrible Why did you do it? I didn't know to say yes. I know what the etiquette is. Oh, dude. You don't want to.

I know. I wanted to be dominated. That's what it was. Hey, what was the email Dave sent the whole office after this? No more strippers. No more strippers. But that wasn't directed at you. It could have been anybody.

It could have been anybody. Another one, TJ? You guys are lucky I wasn't here. Yeah, Nick would have had a further beer for us, TJ. With his Ukraine flag. It could have been anybody. You guys are lucky I wasn't here. Nick would have had a mother beer for us. With his Ukraine flag. Slow that pace, boys. I remember when we were on our way down to Boston for the live podcast

and Nick was like, we were on the train and you're like, as soon as you think I've... What did you say? You were like, as soon as you think I've fucked, I've already fucked. I don't know. I don't know. It was dumb.

Yeah. This is all. I'm already going on. It's over for me. Just mute my mic. I was going to say, you my mic. I think it was like the second you realize you're interested in a girl, I've already fucked. Yeah.

Sass, I know the exact combo you're on right now. It's the PEDs. The PEDs are destroying me. We're chilling. We're good. He's in Buffalo at the game They I threw up in the so mad you didn't tell me that story wait wait You guys go to wing nuts. I'm sorry. I didn't get to finish it. So he puts the fucking VR thing on no one's watching he starts playing dude, he played Star Wars for 15 minutes of him like... I can show you what it was. In the middle of...

And it's TJ. All the hired women and the entire Buffalo Bills team form a semicircle around him as he's... He has no idea. What the fuck? You never mentioned that.

Stephon Diggs is howling laughing. Vaughn Miller is howling... Everyone's dying watching. I didn't even know this. I didn't even know Vaughn didn't even know Von Miller was there. He gets done playing. Turns around, sees the Buffalo Bills. He's like...

And then he walked straight towards me. I was like, and he goes, that game's actually a lot harder than it looked. I was like, yeah. Dude, it was. It was hard as shit. Didn't even process how embarrassing it was. It was hard as shit. Didn't even process how embarrassing it was.

That's why you didn't tell the story. If you were at Dave & Buster's and you saw this game, you would have been drawn to it. Dude, can you imagine taking a VR helmet off and seeing... Wait, I have the video. 50 cool black people laughing at it. Probably a billion dollars worth of contracts. Send it to TJ. Oh, no. So billion dollars worth of contracts. Send it to TJ. Oh, no.

So that people can see it. Send it to TJ. This is just, it's a very short version. There's also, we can get you to send it. LeMayor didn't send the good one. I'm sending the one of you watching the guy playing. Spencer Brown playing that. I'm sending both.

I was on my screen just like, I can't watch this. Another one, Kate? I understand why Sasson told him. I told him. All I have from that weekend is those two videos and then 30 videos of me playing with Gabe Davis' dog. What's the place? We went to the original one, the allegedly original.

Oh, Duff's? No, it's with an A. Anchor Bar. Anchor Bar, yeah. Anchor Bar is very good. It's delicious. Did you go anywhere else? I've been to the other ones before, though.

Have you been to the... Where? What is it? Hell's Gate or something? Oh I've been to the other ones before, though. Have you been to... Where? What is it? Something's Gate? Hell's Gate or something? Oh, Gabriel's Gate. Gabriel's Gate, yeah. Very good.

Very good. I fucking love wings. Wing nuts is the best you can go. Unbelievable. Yeah. So, Shane, you got to go to Wing Nuts. You guys hooked it up for us, too. Yeah.

They have a wait. Yeah. Well, they got a new place now. Oh, I didn't know. So, when we went to Buffalo a couple years ago, random dude hit me up and was like, no one knows this place. It's a couple, an older couple,

and they cook it out of a Knights of Columbus kitchen. I mean, this is outrageous. Spilling the beer, dude. That does not count. Minus one beer. Minus one beer. Minus a whole beer. Minus a full beer for Sass.

They cook wings out of a Knights of Columbus kitchen. We showed up. The best wings I've ever had in my entire life. So then we put a shirt on sale. Everyone bought it. Raised like, I don't know, like 20 grand. Gave it to them, and they got like a whole restaurant now. It's fucking incredible.

It's awesome. And they're like the funniest, coolest, like Buffalo people. I don't know if you can find a picture, TJ. Like, you see them, and they just, it's Ed and Alicia, and they just cook wings. It was one of the best, like, feel-good stories of, like, from Marcelo Ligero. It's really cool. It really is. You got to take a break.

Take a break from the cupcakes. How many have you had? I'm at 11. That's impressive. Nobody's hit one of the landmines yet. You're telling me. Kyle did, but he threw it away behind the two green ones. I have two. Oh.

Both decoys. Oh, great. Okay. That's bad. Imagine that. Shane, when you talked about the Buffalo story on Rogies, I thought that you were about to. I was waiting for it. I won't lie.

I was waiting for it. No, I'm kidding. I wasn't waiting for it. He said he got scared that you were going to. He said his heart started beating that he was going to get dropped on the roof. It does get really pathetic and embarrassing when you start listening to podcasts to see if they say your name. Oh, yeah. 100%.

I've listened to the last two yaks just like, what are these fucking... Yeah. What are these pussies saying? It's weird. That's Ed and Alicia. Damn, dude. They're the best salt on the earth. You look fucking wild, dude. Yeah, and Alicia. Damn, dude. They're the best. Salt of the earth.

You look fucking wild, dude. Yeah, I know. I don't know what I'm wearing. So he was talking to us. Fucking good look. I don't know why PFD's standing so far away. Those are some misfits.

That looks like a picture that would be like someone's missing. No, they're the greatest people in the world. No one in this photo's missing. That's some type of home. No, that's from

Back to the Future. Back to the Future and someone just disappeared. I don't know what I'm doing. That's Ed and of home That's from back to the future Back to the future And someone just disappeared I don't know what I'm doing That's how to unleash it She looks like a captain It looks like The truest salt of the earth

Of all time It looks like a van They're cool The poses are Dude this place I actually almost moved To where Mario is Down on his walk

Have you guys ever seen When the Laker girls Do the meet and greet At Hardee's Oh yes That's exactly What those photos look like It's the best Dude I have not seen that Oh cool Have you guys ever seen when the Laker girls did the meet and greet at Hardee's? Oh, yes. That's exactly what that photo is like. It's the best.

I have not seen that. It's just these miniature men. Everybody at this Hardee's. At Hardee's? It's in like, I forget where in California. Everybody there is stranger looking than the last. Lakers girls did a meet and greet at a Hardee's. Like mid-California.

Wait, but I need to see the tiny guy because he was the smallest guy. Anytime you get out of Los Angeles or San Francisco in California, it gets pretty fucking weird. Oh, buddy. It gets really weird out there. Eastern California is the... Weird. Barstow. San Bernardino.

Weirdos. San Jose is even... They have a million people in San Jose. I don't even... What's wrong with San Jose there's a million people there look at this oh I fucking love this dude

this is the best these women they're five foot one what's his hand doing what's he doing he's doing the movie there's a tiny guy it's not a real guy

it's a tiny guy stop stop I feel bad. This is too tight. No. No, no. Keep strolling.

Keep strolling. Keep going. Keep going. Oh, is that dogs? Stop. Stop. We got to stop. We got to stop.

Edit that. Edit that. Edit that. Oh, no. Keep that in. That's funny. People go find them. There's a hundred of them, and they're all weird.

Can we please keep strolling? Now you have to do them all. You got to do them all. Keep strolling. This is hilarious. Blur them. No, no, no., and they're all weird. Can we please keep scrolling? Now you have to do them all. You've got to do them all. Keep scrolling. Blur them. It's like t-shirt size. No, no, no. No.

They're all special in their own way. They're all special in their own way. No, we've got to keep going. No, keep going. Keep going. Boys, I'm telling you. This is great. Quigs, you've just got to blur these people and let go.

People find it on their own. Tiny guy was nuts. Tiny guy's so small. He's been followed by the big guy. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hey, wait a minute. Wait a minute. Go down.

Go down, man. Let's compliment him first. Oh, no. No, stop. Say something nice. He's not. Great jean jacket. He looks good.

He looks good. He's proportionally perfect. This guy rules. You know he's pulling up there like, I'm fucking all of it. That was a nice jean jacket on that guy. He looked like the menthol Marlboro. Come on, man. Come on.

Come on, man. Next to you was a full man in black, dude. That was fucking incredible. I want to see all of them. Tiny Man was... Just keep scrolling a little. Maybe just a little bit. I wanted to see all of them. Tiny Man was... Just keep scrolling. Just keep scrolling a little. Maybe just a little bit.

I wanted to see Tiny Man one more time. Tiny Man is crazy. Tiny Man's insane. Oh, stop. He looks good. He looks good. Is that a kid

or is that a man? Oh, no, that's a man. He looks good. He's probably 37. Dude, if you saw him from the distance, you'd be like... Perfect.

Good looking guy? Great guy. Great looking dude. Proportionally. You can saw him from the distance, you'd be like, perfect. Good looking guy. Great looking dude. Proportionally. You could see him from a distance. You know what, though? It would be funny if he... I couldn't see him from like 30 feet away. No, no, no.

You see him and you think he's way further away. Like a half mile away. What if these Lakers girls are all like 6'5"? Maybe. Oh, way, dude. What if? Could be. Oh, way.

Could be. What if? You should. Oh, way. Could be. What if? You should post that. He should post it and be like, I found these two giant bitches. You think that's on his

profile picture on like Facebook? Lakers only hire Laker girls that are over six feet. Oh, that's fucking awesome. I've never seen this. Oh, dude,

I think there's an album of 250. Oh, man. Wow. You see the Alabama fans running for the autographs? Yes. Yeah.

I've never seen it. Running up the gumps. It's pretty great. They do like a spring game. End of the spring game, they do autographs. And all these Alabama fucking. We're at nine. Open the gates at the same time.

Just finish one. And it's 100 yards across the field. You know what? Have you guys ever seen like, I think it was like, have you guys ever seen like I think it was like you guys ever see the pictures that come out of the like when there's like those what is the porn convention

AVN yeah AVN the pictures that the dudes 10 I just finished one oh yeah yeah those are fucking crazy that's Glennie

same vibe as that though Glennie just went and he said that was the weirdest part was just looking around and seeing all like Glennie's a 10 at the AVN Awards.

But photos with the actresses there... Glennie's a 10 on an everyday. Photos with the actresses there, I think, are like 200 bucks. What? You have to pay for the photos. Oh, dude, they're saving up their life savings to go to that. Yeah. Oh, I think some of the actresses kind of give it away.

Like, they'll just give away a titty grab. For real? Yeah. They do. I saw a video of a girl blowing a dude at the AVN. Yeah, finish that beer. What did you do when you saw that? I was mastering it.

Where'd you find it? I saw it on Reddit. It was probably on r slash blowjobs. Sask, finish that beer. You're a mod of that, dude. The restrictor played off your Reddit? Yeah, this is head. Yeah, this is head.

Being a moderator? No, dude, I've researched. Yeah, this is head. Being a moderator on... No, dude, I've researched... Dude, wait, Shane, have you heard this? Roan is a... Roan's a mod on the anti-fat Reddit. No, I...

Yeah, you are. Yeah, you are. It's been banned. Fat people hate. They made me like the... He was the honorary mod of fat people hate. They made me their king

of fat people hate after the Big T-verse came out and they were like, he articulated all the things that we've been dying to say and so they made me an honor. Alright, being a big fat... You ain't fat.

No, no, no. That was my fourth. But I'm saying like... At 11? Being a giant fat person is like, yeah, you can call them a loser. If you're dedicating yourself

to hating them... I did it because he was trying to rap battle me. a loser. If you're dedicating yourself to hating them... I did it because he was trying to rap battle me. No, not you. Sass just spilled all over the place. That's a second spill for Sass. Yeah, note it. If you're actively hating fat people... I think that was your third. Let's grab your penis for the camera.

Sass, I think that was your third. No, that was my fourth. 100% my fourth. Sass, don't fib, your third. No, that was my fourth. Just for the camera. Count the cans. 100% my fourth. Count the cans. Sass, don't fib, dude. Hey, but if you think it's my third, it's my third. I just want to make sure we're not miscounting. Every case, every cooler has 24 beers.

Sass, drop that can. Oh, shit. My bad. And it'll all come out. Here, let me see that can. We're at 14, three in the cup, 11. Fuck. Wait, but did you cast count?

Yeah, three in the cup. Oh, so if they don't know, we're at 12. So is this my third? I might be wrong. That'll be the 15th cup. That'll be the 15th can. We're at 12. Yeah, I didn't.

Steven's the man. You and Steven having silence. Yeah, because I'm at five. Cat and the rat. Put the can sideways so I can count. I don't know if you guys know this, but I am wrong a lot. How did you guys let us form this super team? I know, this is not.

This is wild. Brandon. Strike a beer. I actually feel proud of Brandon. I would like to point out, I actually did say that we were a super team. We should have a four plus baby cap. All of the data was pointed at super team. I'm eating a cupcake.

I can eat all 15. You want to do a cupcake? I kind of the data was pointed at Super Team. I'm eating a cupcake. I've had a cupcake. I can eat all 15. Do you want to do a cupcake? I kind of just wanted the cupcake. Do 15. Do 15, Brandon. I honestly didn't feel good after I had the first cupcake. Take it easy on the cupcake. The only thing that could derail us is that jug of shit.

Right, yeah. I forgot about that. Yeah, that is going to destroy someone's weekend. The jug of shit. The jug of shit. For real, I will quit if I get it. Wait, Shane, do you know really where that comes from? That's actually beer.

He actually brought it. No offense. No, it's not offensive. Zaw's cool. Zaw, where are you from? Zimbabwe. Thank God I didn't guess. He was in Zimbabwe for a month

and he brought that back as archery. And that's good. You're saying it's good? Yeah. You didn't ferment it long enough. We haven't had time. Well, if you can drink, I can drink. No, Zah, that's not up to standard for you, though, because you said the sun was wrong. Yeah, so it's less potent. So the sun makes it stronger. Zah, can you tell real

quick the abbreviated story of how you got hired? Because Barstool has the best hiring story. I have no idea. I've never heard how Zod got hired. Yeah, it's all of our hiring. I mean, Brandon got hired because what was the place? My bookie.

My bookie. He heard Dave about gambling. Yeah, said that Dave doesn't really gamble and Dave just eviscerated them. And then Brandon was the first person to go live on MyBookie after Dave eviscerated them and they had like 7,000 people just making fun of Brandon. There's a documentary about it. Yeah.

How were you hired? It's amazing. Abbreviated version. I jumped up on a table and just screamed. Play the video. What'd you scream? You were a Barstool super fan. I was a tell us. Play the video. Play the video. Play the video. What'd you scream? Wait, yeah. You were a Barstool super fan?

Okay, so I was a Barstool fan during college. My roommate was from Massachusetts, introduced me to it. Rosenberg, Peter Rosenberg, you know him? The DJ? Oh, yeah. Peter Rosenberg claimed that Barstool had no black fans. My roommate forced me to call into Barstool Radio, called in. They didn't believe, well, whoever was on the show, Kevin, Kevin, Dave, and I think Coley was on it, didn't believe that I was from Zimbabwe.

And they invited you? They invited me into the office once they kind of checked in and all that. You showed up? TJ, play the video. Play the video. Dude, this is an all-time. I've never watched this before. Oh, dude, this is an all-time.

Really? This is one of the first things that I watched when I, this is an all-time. I've never watched this before. Oh, dude, this is an all-time. Really? Really? This is one of the first things that I watched when I got hired. I don't watch anything I do. It was basically, shout out Peter Rosenberg for saying we have no balls. You're bald. Yeah, he's bald. Standing up on the table. I don't know why you're on the table.

So I've been listening to music and all this nonsense, Prez. I've got some advice for you. Okay. You've got to start firing some people around here. Then you've got Smitty sending you Jews. You're going to take that? Well, no. That's the equivalent of the N-word in the black community, and we burn people for that.

We burn people for that. Zah, you're making a lot of sense. All these guys... Imagine if someone texted me the N-word. That's the equivalent of what you did. I didn't. You sent them that Jew text. Stop trying to throw buddies at them. That's equivalent of what you did. I didn't. You sent him that Jew text. There's no way.

Stop trying to throw buddies out of the way. Stop trying to throw buddies out of the way. I got about absolutely you, Smith. I did not. What do you mean absolutely you?

You are neat. Dude, who just randomly leaves, in this day and age, who leaves their phone unattended? Well, that's the issue. If you want to punish me,

punish me for that. No, he asked you a question. No, but that was a derogatory term, too. Like you said, I know for a fact it's you. Your story does not add up at all. He's right, it doesn't. So you consider yourself lucky that you're actually still in this room.

I like this guy's off. Oh, he's the man. You're a motherfucker. I can't even. No, wait, wait. I can't even just lift the world up for her. Shane, for context, Smitty had been working here for how many years at that time? It was 2017, so probably six years.

No, no, no. Smitty DM'd Dave. No, no, no. Like 2013, he was maybe part-time. I'm saying this was in 2018. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And so for five years. For five years.

Smitty's like nine employees. Yeah. Smitty DM'd Dave and he just said, Jew. That's funny. Is that bad? I love Smitty, so I'm not going to... I love Smitty, too. Are they not friends?

He's the funniest person here. Does Smitty ever hold hate towards you? Oh, it was for real. It was a real anti-Semitic message. It was a friendly message. I don't know. I'm friends with a lot of Jewish guys. It was a pluralized because that's better.

It was pluralized. Jews. He just said Jews? I don't know. I back Smitty on this. I do think that he got drunk at a shore house. But Zod, did Smitty hold any hate against you? No, not at all. Actually, drunk at a shore house. But Zod, does Smitty help? We've all been there. Hold any hate against you?

No, not at all. Actually, one of my closest people. Smitty's the best. I was chilling with him when we did Who's Better with Roan. First time chilling with Smitty? Fine. He is a delight. Zod, one thing to add to your story, Zod.

Me and Hank. You Hank and White. Roan, Hank and White. Me and Hank, yeah, we're in the other room in the middle and we're like, bro, if you want a job here, you gotta go in there

and make a scene right away. And we were like, bro, jump on the table. Do some crazy shit. He's like, yeah, jump on the table. And it's like, I hate when people

come to Barstool and you give them advice and they don't take it. We gave him advice. Maybe it was good, maybe it was bad. He took it right away and I think that's the most valuable thing.

Hey, I'll fucking jump on the table. He jumped out of the window and immediately it was fantastic. Maybe it was bad advice, but bro, you got it. And it worked out because you're like an integral part of Bar. I can't imagine it without you.

What's your job? I don't know. We're turning into love. It's goodbye. integral part of Bar- Like, I can't imagine it without you. Zah, what's your job? What are we doing? I don't know. What are we doing? We're turning into love. It's goodbye. No, this is all love. This is my love, Zah, but what the fuck are we doing?

It's goodbye. We're going to get 90,000 views on this. You guys remember when Zah was in charge of approving our vacations? Yes. How'd he do that? What the fuck? So Dave was like,

I think maybe Eric or someone was like, you know, you got to, you're, you know, in front of content, like if people want to take vacations, like you got to tell them. Dave just told you Zah, right? Yeah, pretty much. And so people would literally go into Dave's office and be like, I want to take a vacation, be like, talk to Zah. Caleb, the best, by the way.

He was, he was the best. Caleb? Caleb's the man. He really followed the Zaf. Caleb, the best, by the way. He was the best. Caleb? Caleb's the man. He's so goddamn funny. Why was he the best? Because I knew exactly where he was at every moment of his life. He was living it up? Yeah, I mean, that's, yeah, I'm not going to lie.

He was living it up. He lives it up. He's got the Vita Loco. No, the Vita Loco. I tell you, when I was in Miami, I was doing shows, and he was like, I'll be at your show, dude. And I was like, all right, you got it. And he was like, I haven't slept yet.

I was like, there's no chance you're going to make the show. He made it, right? It's at 10. He was like, I'm going to be there. I was like, dude, if you haven't slept in two days, you're never going to make the show. And no, of course he did not. He didn't make it? No, he didn't.

Usually he makes it. He's a road warrior. He'll go 48 hours. It was day two. Day two, no sleep. I was doing a show at night. What was he doing? Number one, do I want you there? He's partying. He was probably partying.

One of the funniest moments on the act, because Caleb was part of the act, and anytime he wants to come back, he's just like, I got an announcement. I'm done apologizing for partying people try to shame me i like to party no joke i just made that announcement yeah wow i was like yeah i was like i gotta either quit drinking or stop being ashamed of it right i mean it was really like a revelation yeah Yeah. Because every time I wake up, I'm like, man, I'm fucking 35. Right.

That's exactly what he said. He was like, people trying to shit on me? I'm done feeling sorry for myself for partying. Gene, your birthday was recently. What's that? Your birthday was recently. It was. It was last month, you fucking freak psycho.

I texted. I texted. Oh, I know it because the last text I sent you. The last text I sent Shane was Happy birthday and he replied and said shut the fuck up That's not true Yes it is I would have said STFU

We all know what that means Spelling out shut the fuck up That would take too much time I looked at him and I said If that's what he thinks, that's what he thinks I'm the panda I said you know what maybe said, if that's what he thinks, that's what he thinks. I'm the panda, man. I said, you know what? Maybe I should shut the fuck up.

What are the rules for piss? Maybe I should sit down and listen for a while. No one's allowed to piss. You just went and pissed. What? No. You did? So I'm going to go with this.

I mean, KB pissed. I pissed. KB, how are you feeling, birthday boy? You got one more. People are allowed to just piss at their own... You good? Are they doing anything? The cupcakes are mixing poorly. birthday boy? You got one more. People are allowed to just piss at their own... You good? Are they doing anything? The cupcakes are mixing poorly.

With what? The mushrooms? You shouldn't have took the mushrooms. The mushrooms should knock some shit off, though. It's fine. It's fine. Have you tried on those kicks I got you? Because I think I bought women's.

I think they're too small. It doesn't matter. Do they fit? Maybe a women's nine is what I bought, maybe. Let's get the gun. Get the gun? No, don't. KB bought an airsoft gun.

He bought an airsoft gun. Really sick airsoft gun. It's broken. Shake it up, John. Can't fix it. Nick comes up to me and he goes, hey, KB wants someone to look at this airsoft gun because it's broken. I pull it out of a massive suitcase. It's a real gun.

Look at that shot Mr. Mistoffelees Stuffed on cupcakes How do you know the names of the people from Cats? That's the only one I remember Rum Tum Tiger There's one named Rum Tum Tiger? Yeah

Oh yeah You for real just look like a gay guy Sassy ass bro You look like RuPaul's Drag Race. If he walked down the street in New York, no one would stop him. Yeah, you'd be like Arizona desert vibes. The top is desert. The face is geisha.

Sass, didn't you go out as the Joker last time? Yeah. He was out till four in the morning or something. No, I went to. You could go out. Nick would clean up. Oh, I would clean up. Kate, you could go out too. in the morning or something. Now I went to... You could go out. Nick would clean up. Oh, I would clean up. Kate, you could go out too.

I think so. Regular, I would... I would just think you were on drugs. Like, you're like a party lady. I do the... What is it with the spray paint where you suck in the... Oh, the Huffer. Yeah, I'm a Huffer.

Yeah, you look like Charlie. He's from our area. Yeah, a couple of cans of that. That's so good. You would... Good shit. People would be like, yeah. I actually gave myself some full body shit.

Hey, but you could head over to the Stonewall Inn and just fucking clean shop. Historically gay bar, right? That's what you're talking about, right? Nick actually would, though. Nick would. Yeah, this would work. Pansexual pussy. That's what we're going to do.

Nick looks like a superhero with jaundice. There will be. There will be. Good, dude. Don't let them bring you down. That mask. Is it the yellow paint? There will be a Ukrainian superhero within the next 16 months.

Zelinsky, bro. He already is. The way they sack off Zelinsky. He'll be in a Marvel movie. Yesterday was his birthday. This case race is for him. Dude, I wish I were bro. He already is. The way they suck off Zelinsky. He'll be in a Marvel movie. Yesterday was his birthday. This case race is for him. Dude, I wish I were him. I'm surprised they don't

respect that hell out of that guy. We should tell the green sweatshirt in the barstool story. No, I do not wish I were him. Yo, how sick is Zelinsky? Yeah. That's the man. Dude, do you know that he did comedy?

He's so cool. And he's funny, too. Fucking murderer. That's your upward trajectory Like if you reach your ceiling You could be the leader President of Ukraine Yeah

I like how That's my goal When he came to the US And people were like He couldn't fucking dress up Couldn't wear a suit Yeah he was wearing He was wearing a green t-shirt

He was wearing his military outfit Like he was a troop It's like He was He had a set He was stealing ballots Were the Were the Kritschko brothers

fighting? They were getting in there. They were getting in it, right? You ran across those two fucking freaks. They should have fought each other. What were we talking about? Vladimir and Vitaly Klitschko? The world was waiting for them to fight each other. Did you see how sad it was when they asked Tyson Fury about winning that fight?

It was Ariel Hawane and he was asking about Tyson. He was like, you beat Klitschko. What was that like? And he's like, to be honest, it was like the saddest. My life's been shit since. I can't do it with Tyson Fury. Hold on.

It sounds like Tyson Fury. I can get it. That was more McGregor. That was McGregor. I don't know who Tyson Fury is, but I bet that. I asked Tyson Fury after a fight. You talked to Tyson Fury? He was on PMT, and I asked him after a fight.

I was like, how many must feel awesome when you win a fight? You just go to the bar, and he's like, oh, I've been sober for four years. Ah. Dude, that was like when I went out with Graham, Alex Bennett's husband. It doesn't jerk off. It doesn't jerk off or drink, apparently.

And I was like, dude, man. Alex Bennett's husband was going out with Tyson Fury? No, I went out with him. And I was like, dude, we got fucked up last night. And he was like, I don't drink. It was just me and him at a bar, and I was just getting blackout. He's just slamming like seltzer waters. That's weird, though.

It was weird as shit. That's on him. I was like, dude, this is like a fun night. Just two guys just getting fucking blackout together. That's on him. I was like, dude, this is like a fun night. Just two guys just getting fucking blackout together. He just turned 30. He's dead sober. He did just turn 30. Yeah?

Yeah, he just turned 30. Wow. Can you imagine the beans you were spilling to that guy? Oh, so many. You probably trashed us all. I was like, Graham, let's kiss on the lips. Steve. No one's got to know.

Nobody trashed you. I was trying. Roan? Roan's a good friend of mine I was like man Fuck that guy What was that about He was like no Steve's a good dude

I was like Fuck Steve's probably A good dude I suck up for For Che Yeah No I couldn't have You did

You guys all did Yeah my line with Che Is always like Everybody did He's the most annoying Person ever But I love him to death He's also I mean we give him A lot of shit Across the board He's very normal KB got a post-it note My line with Che is always like, he's the most annoying person ever, but I love him to death.

It's also, I mean, we give him a lot of shit. He's very normal. KB got a post-it note. KB got a post-it note. He's recklessly positive. No, he is the most annoying person I've ever met, but I love him to death. And he makes us all money. I think he acted a little silly that night, but other than that.

Facts. I also just want to say hand up. I had a lot to do with that i didn't even know about it i came back here although your order was just the worst i've ever looked i knew screaming uh i'll get you fired was funny i knew it was funny while it was happening i was like i know this is funny when it escalated i was like now it looks pretty bad i think i think at one point that like dude do you know what i realized i didn't realize this obviously like the in the moment or the day after i watched stool scenes after and brandon was the referee and he was like taking how many people drank and i was offering to wrestle anybody yeah so correct yeah so in the hallway he would fight anybody i think you were just in the wrong place at the wrong time, brother.

Don't get me wrong. Don't get me wrong. Steven mocked me on that. He stood over me. Here's the truth. There's zero chance I was going to wrestle on cavemen. My fat belly hanging out. You're like.

On the TV12 diet it would have been a disaster what you maybe don't know is that like a bunch of people have wrestled on here just like I mean Compton like Wallow like a bunch of people just come on here and just like fucking just sticking around they all wrestle KB we were not in the state to do that

and I was also not prepared to wrestle you I need to say that I was like maybe 90% to blame for all of that. Because I just kept on saying it's a hard to say. I don't even remember that. I don't remember that. I thought it was funny. That was the best part.

I thought it was exciting. I love that. When it happened, I was like, that was great. I wanted to run it back. It was only afterwards that the comments were like, in the moment, I was like, this is awesome. Yeah. And then people were like, in the moment, I was like, this is awesome. Yeah. And then people were like, fuck him, about Steve. And I was like, no, it's okay.

We talked. It was okay. There was a very funny 50-50 like, fuck Shane. Who the fuck does he think he is? And then, fuck Stephen Che. Who the fuck does he think he is? The money talk got bad. But also, I was fully- The money talk was wonderful. What was the money talk? I don? The money talk got bad, but also I was

money talk was I remember money talk. Sass being like, why don't I get fucking paid more? I don't remember that. And then that. I don't even want to that's one thing that I haven't even revisited in my head. I forgot. I had to text Big Cat. You deserve

more money. I'd be like, dude, you know I fucking appreciate everything. That was like not even like a funny fuck up. had to text Big Cat that's why you deserve more money and be like dude you know I fucking appreciate everything that is that was that was like not even like a funny fuck up that was like I might kill myself

tonight see your inner like thought your inner mind that was mortifying which is mortifying mortifying I don't know

you and me sat on those recliners and I was like dude here's the thing about me that was extremely that is the point no the worst part was like V dude, here's the thing about it. That was extremely No, the worst part was like Viva La Stool

screenshots and they're like, the goat and the apprentice. I think they were being sarcastic. They're not sarcastic ever. They were being serious. It is funny that people don't fucking realize It was super lame. And I was like, please take this down. It is funny though that people don't fucking realize. It was super lame. And I was like, please take this down.

It is funny, though, that people don't realize, like, after that case race, we all hung out in the office for, like, hours. I was talking to Shiloh. I threw up for about an hour. I was talking to Shiloh. We hung out in the office. Oh, yeah. We were waving the white flag. I woke up in my bed, and it was still going on.

You left during the show? I woke up in my bed, and was still going on. You left during the show. I woke up in my bed and I thought I left after the show. I was watching it live. I was like, holy fuck. Dude, I came back. I remember I was getting, I went, I sold the story before, but I went downstairs to the bodega next door because I lost my vape. Turns out Roan had it.

And I went and I got the vape and I was walking back and KB was leaving. And I was like, where are you going? And he was like, I'm just going home, man. I did. Yeah, dude. I thought it was over, yeah. I knew it was unwatchable. And then the next morning I would see guys send pictures of having parties.

Oh, that was the worst part. Devastating. And they're like, yo, me and my buddies flew in from town for this. We're all going to watch it together. Flew in from town? Not even too far. Flew in from town. By the way, I left sober and I texted TJ,'re all going to watch it together. If it's from town. Not even too big. I left sober and I texted TJ, are we going to put that out?

This is Sass's text after the... I don't read that. Don't read that. You had to. I was waking up in the green room of the office. That's my least favorite thing about Barstool is I'm afraid to text you.

You guys screenshot text. I didn't screenshot. I just scrolled up. I said what it was. He said, I love you and I appreciate everything you do for us with all my heart. No, don't put that out. Please don't let anyone know. That's not bad, dude.

I'll read my reply. It's not bad. I love you and I appreciate everything you do for us with all my heart. I was a fucking asshole last night. I don't know what happened. I got way too drunk and I'm sorry. I wrote back. It's all good, bro.

I knew you were drunk. I don't take any of that to the next day. Wait, time out. That's what I said. We don't take any of that to the next day. Wait, simultaneously, that's your private conversation. You're having the same conversation in the group chat at the same time. Sass says, this is back in June, laying in the green room praying no one walks in.

You had these screenshotted or something? No. Roll up. Tell us to active-ass chat. Just roll up. Hey, you know what I typed in the act? I typed in the word scaries, and it popped right back to the last case where it said, laying in the green room praying no one walks in here while simultaneously running through all the horrible decisions I made in the last 24 hours.

And Big Cat says if I can offer some solace, sass, you were way worse after the show. Solace. Yeah, you were. I was. You were. I was. I was way worse after the show. I was way worse.

Remember that? Yeah. I remember me, you, Che, and Will Compton sitting in here and being like, why don't I make more money? What the hell is going on? You did text this. You talked to anybody that was listening. You did text this a month later. You're like, it's bullshit.

I don't make a million dollars a year. When is that going to happen? No. That was real. Oh, that's real. I wanted that so bad. That was this morning. That was this morning sober.

That was to the cleaning lady. So what people don't necessarily know about that, the next day we taped at like, I don't know, 1030, 11 o'clock. And we're going to do like a recap of the case race. And I live in Jersey and I'm taking the train in. TJ, one more. And then I'm like, all right, well, our little altercation happened maybe in the first hour, hour and a half of the show. It was like a four-hour show. So I was like, ah, you know, it's probably not that big of a deal.

People probably forgot about it. And then the graphics team sent the, or maybe TJ sent it, the preview for the episode. Okay, but the preview was fucking, the preview was the funniest part of the entire episode. My God. No, I was the same thing. I was like, man, every time I go on Barstool, they fucking clip literally the worst thing I say. Dude, imagine. Dude, I'm here.

Every time. They make me look like I'm a fucking dumbass. Well, it's not like they're doing it. Yeah, I did. Now me, I'm a pretty good guy. See, I have a hard time. I have a hard time. I'm smart.

I have a hard time separating the difference between mice and mouse, and that's just been destroying my life. Yeah, that is a... Shane, by the way, so what I knew was bad for you, subscribe to Shane's Patreon. It's great. I subscribe. You guys need more?

They need the help. Number one on Patreon. And Shane's secret podcast. I watched that, like, what it was, maybe the next day or maybe two days later. And you're like, Matt was like, how's it going, man? Like, I'm having a hell of a time. I was like, for real, fucked up. You're like, the Parcel guys are just fucking at me.

The commenters are at me. Yeah, I, so the day after. He was like, you have at me. The commenters are at me. He was telling me. He was like, you have no idea how bad commenters are. So I was like, dude, our commenters are brutal. Me and Matt, they hate me. They talk shit constantly. About you? Yeah, but I thought.

You got nicknames for it. No, I thought I had things worse. And then the next day, when our episode came out, I was like, yo, Barstool people are way worse. They're so nasty as fuckers of all time. You gotta always remember the commenters are the people

that care the most. Like, they, as mean as they can get, they care the most. And they also watch every show. But as an outsider, I was coming in and they were like,

fuck this guy. He's, you know, wrestling scholarships matter. People were on my side. Dude, I don't know even, I have no passion about that topic at all. Oh, you were passionate that day. I don't know about that. Dude, all I know is I was, the next day, we recorded the hangover episode.

Please try to fight me. Yeah, I care. I was getting hip-tossed on the balloons. Five balloons pop. Hip-tossed. A huge dude on the balloons. Dude, I remember that. Light as a feather.

I remember that. So we recorded it on, what, a Wednesday or a Thursday. Came out on Friday. I remember we both had spots at the stand the next day. And I remember some dude coming up to me and being like, yo, Shane's over there. You talk to him yet? Oh, yeah.

They thought we were fighting. We were going to fight in person. Dude, you would knock me out at the stand. At the stand, especially. All he did, dude, he didn't let his fist talk. He buried me, dude. It was unbelievable. He went hand-in-hand with you?

He went on and just dominated. I was sitting back there That was actually the same show I remember I was on stage And I looked over And Shane was peeking Through the window And then I bombed

I was like Shane's watching? At the stand Like this That front room You could just like Watch through the window Indoors Makes me so happy

Whenever I see sass I stick my head in And go Oh you're killing it This is not good Watch through the window. Indoors. Makes me so happy. Whenever I see Sass, I stick my head in and go. You're killing it. This is not good. Even though it is. Hey, man, if you think that, that's on you.

I respect the hell out of you. The pandas. I respect the hell out of you. No, it's helpful. I think that it's helpful for Sass' career. Did we see Tiny Guy again? By the way, Roan, we're trailing them on beers. We're like right there. We're at.

I just got. We haven't counted all of them. I will say I am worried about my cupcakes. I think I'm going to eat. I'll say this now. It just hit me that I am definitely now. Kate and Roan, let me know if you guys are trying to win. I'm in a tough spot with the cupcakes.

But I did just hit a moment in my brain where I said, uh-oh. Even you're going to need to eat two cupcakes. Brandon, you ate 13? But no, I'm at 12. He had one. We're at 17. I had 12. We started the show at 57. But you're all drinking, though.

But you're all drinking. Check. Ah, fuck. You're doing great for having wine before the show Maybe this should have just been the hungover show Where we just get drunk and recap the last episode We don't have enough beers Yeah

Wait, don't have enough beers? Don't have enough beers Every cooler has 24 You only have 20 Unless you took some out Oh my god No, it happened to me too You only have 20. Unless you took some out. Okay. Oh, my God. No, it happened to me, too. There's nothing more alarming than wiping your nose and it's black.

There were two 36s I divided evenly amongst three. I might grab a cupcake to, like, gently munch on. Yeah, gently munch on one. This is in the cups, so that's 17 done. No, but it should be just count the cans. 21, 22, 23 One short Okay

One beer short Not even in the wheel Dude you know What we gotta do Is get Matt in here more Yeah You gotta get Matt Dude the best episode

We ever had of Son of a Boy Dad Was with Matt I know you said that I said that all To Shane To piss him off I don't give a

I said it purposefully To piss him off But it's also We were When we had you on We were still working out Rones the guy We get on our podcast I chewed Shane and he got mad. I chewed Shane to piss him off. I don't give a fuck. I said it purposefully to piss him off. When we had you on, we were still working out. Roan's the guy we get on our podcast. Have you ever been on ours? I might be your most viewed. What beer are you on, Nick? Literally, no.

No chance. Five or six. I don't think you've even been on the show, have you? Five, so that will be the end of six? For the after the buffalo. That will be... Sass, what beer are you on? If you don't remember that that that's cool with me

and I respect the hell out of you you get Roan on there a lot Roan's funny as fuck Roan is funny cause I I get the same thing that the Barstool fans

give to you when I go over there and they're like fuck this fucking pussy these Barstool Roan is Roan is the most quick witted person

hard F slurs hard the crossovers always bring out... I went on JJ Reddick's podcast today. You were great on that. Well, it hasn't been that. Oh, Jesus Christ. Oh, oh, oh.

Oh, liar. You got a big hat. That's a liar. Never compliment me again. I watched the two minute clip and you... I'm saying this like a mom. I watched it twice. You were phenomenal.

There was a shit load of... There was a lot of comments being awesome and there was a lot of comments being like, fuck this, why would you fuck with Barstool? Who cares? I love when they throw the asterisk on the edge. Sass used to talk shit on Barstool. I went through a nice phase where I was like, Barstool actually sucks.

Who'd you shout to? All the best comedians have or still do. Yeah. And now the more you watch Barstool, you're like, that's funny. Dude, Brandon's hilarious. He's hilarious. He's so funny. I started listening to Yak, dude.

Brandon's hilarious. He's my favorite guy. You guys trash him, dude. Yeah, and he goes with that. He wants that. He wants that. That was awfully easy. He can handle it.

Weirdly, I was thinking about this. This is now going to be a dick-sucking contest, but I was thinking about this morning, weirdly. Brandon, there's no one better at barstool who goes with the flow. He can punch, dude. He takes a punch. He eats punches. He eats punches. He likes it.

He eats punches. He goes with it, has fun with it. I fuck with Brandon. He knows that it's love because we have a relationship and we text all the time. But like,

no one goes to the punch better than Brandon. Brandon knows it because I texted him. Oh, no. I mean, Brandon and I have a different relationship.

You want me to shut up? I'll shut up. Brandon knows that he and I have a different relationship. You want me to shut up? I'll shut up. Brandon knows that he and I have a different relationship. Let me take a step back and just listen for a minute. Brandon will say it. You and I have a deeper relationship. We're getting there. We're getting to that.

We have a deeper relationship than we let on, but he goes with it better than anyone at Barstool. So Brandon was like a viral hire. He got hired because of this raid on MyBookie, and the odds of it working, zero. But the reason why he got hired was because when the raid happened on MyBookie, he went with it.

But he was flustered a little bit. But he went with it. But he went with it. But the odds of him becoming what he is now, nah, that's cool. Oh, wait. The part they're leaving out is at one point... Another one for us.

Was it Dave or somebody else who was like, they went on the thing and they're like, quit your job right now and join us or don't? He called me. I came on Barstool Radio

with Big Cat and with Dave. And then Dave said, I'm going to go into my office and hire this guy. He called me and he said, hey, come work for me. I said, okay, I'll work for you, but I have to break a relationship

with a guy who got me this job. I'll come work for you tomorrow. He said, no, you got to do it right now or never. I said, well, I'll work for you, but I have to break a relationship with a guy who got me this job. I'll come work for you tomorrow. He said, no, you got to do it right now or never. I said, well, fuck it. I'll do it. 30 minutes later. Meanwhile, Brandon has a wife and kids. Dave was like, either do it right now with no info or don't.

That's kind of a fucking cocksucker thing. Brandon did it. Burn this bridge or fucking don't fuck with me. A friend has not talked to me since. This is my husband. All right, you're chilling. I'm good. Brandon and I, I mean, you would agree.

Like, we... No, nobody's done more for me than you. You and I both... Oh, this is nice. No, no, no, but we... I love Brandon. Like, I literally love him. This is good vibes.

Yeah, this is good vibes. One of the nicest texts I ever got was from Sass, though. Here we go. What did it say? One morning, Sass texted me. I don't know where it said. It was not the morning. I was still out if it was from Sass though. Here we go. What did it say? One morning Sass texted me. I don't know where it said. It was not the morning. I was still out if it was the morning. It was still one morning.

It was still one morning. We're at 20. He texted me and he's like I'm the biggest fucking fan of you. I fucking love you. That's what Sass said. Wait, no. Cool. We're 19. How was that one gay one gay all on send it if i have

to we're right we're right yeah we're 19 no i love brandy go like i legitimately love the guy and he goes with the punches better than anyone and he works his fucking ass off you're about to do because i do have a belly full of 12 cupcakes. Hell yeah. You're good. Okay, thanks. Look at our score. It's lopsided.

We are not in a good position. We made a mistake. We're not in a good spot. We made a big mistake. We are lopsided. Wait a minute. No, we're lopsided. We're not doing too bad compared to...

Well, there's no... 16 and 13 is looking good. I'll say that. These are going down. I've been putting them behind my back to warm them up. 13 looks great. I'm doing so great. Me?

Steven's doing so great. You might tap. You are hurting. Are you? If I'm doing bad, you can let me know. No, no, no. Tap, tap. Tasp.

I just had a cupcake. I have to take a piss. Finish it. Finish it. Finish it. And then we're on our last beers, and let's get to cupcakes. Did I ever tell you about my first interview with Dave? No. No.

Gaz was in there. I was talking to him the whole time, and then Dave came in first time. I wasn't expecting to meet him because I interviewed with Quigs. Right. And Gaz was just like, yeah, he's like a less funny KB. Dave was just like, is that true? I was like, yeah. He's like a less funny KB. It was just like, is that true? I was like, yeah. He's like, we don't need that.

You don't need someone less funny than KB? I didn't know that was the story. Yeah. Put your belly away, bro. In KB's first interaction, he worked in the office for, what was it, six months, KB? You like came and went. You were like.

Yeah, for like seven months And then I just One day I was like Come over here Yeah you said What's the deal with you Yeah I was like What's the deal with you

You seem like a prickly fellow Yeah We talked for We talked for 30 minutes And I was just like I fucking like you dude Cause I He literally would just

Show up to the office For like two hours And then leave And then come back like two hours and then leave. And then come back for two hours and leave. For six months. He would go to different hotels. Yeah, he would hop around to hotels. KB's Yak debut was the worst.

The worst. Couldn't have gone worse. Yeah. I was like, hey, really? Yeah. Remember afterwards? I thought it was good. It was so bad. I was like, I pulled you aside. I was like hey really yeah remember afterwards i was so bad i was like i i pulled your side i was like hey listen dude don't let that get to you when we do no i said to him

i was like when we do a radio show like you gotta talk and he's like what yeah all right i was wasted yeah i'm gonna be honest i was shocked you came back for a second day i fucking thought he was hilarious you're right you're right. You're right. Yeah. The minute I talked to him, I remember it. Remember in the old office when you sat in my corner? For 30 minutes, we talked. I journaled about that. I logged it.

Yeah, I was pumped. Can you read that journal one day? Wait, wait, wait. You have it? No, you haven't. He's groaning right now. He's groaning. You've got to be hurting.

He's hurting. He's hurting. You have that journal. Yeah, he's hurting. He's hurting. He's hurting. You have that journal. Yeah, he's purring. It's not a purring. Yeah, it's not a purring. Yeah, it's a purr. Pull it up.

No, I can't. No, read it. I'm not gonna read my journal. This is your 30th birthday. Yeah, this is your 30th birthday. Birthday, birthday. Read my journal. No, read your journal.

Superlative. From that day. I'm sober. I'm just gonna say no. Can I ask another question? From that day. I'm sober. I'm just going to say no. Can I ask another question? It'd be right's thoughts. It's as simple as that. Are the mushrooms doing anything? Yeah, I feel the mushrooms a little bit.

I feel I'm pretty good at it. They're legal. They're legal. Am I allowed to ask? Does this make me a bad person if I have like one? Yeah. Yeah, no, they're legal. Is that dumb?

You're good. What? Wait, KB. I don't know. You read that journal entry from that day? Come on, man. I don't know how I would find it. It was like 2018.

I was doing every single day since 2018. Show me your journal. I'm not going to show you any of that. Come on. Do you know what a journal... Come on. I'll read some, but I read some... I'm that day.

You're sober and we're going to bully you. I'm that day. What am I doing? No. I'm that day. You're sober and we're going to bully you. What am I doing? No. I'm that day. I would love to relive that day. Pull up your journal from the day you went to the hospital for weed. Oh, no. I had stopped journaling by then.

It wasn't weed. We're at 22. We're going to cupcakes, boys. I'm on my last. They're going to win, boys. We're going to cupcakes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm on my last. They're going to win. Let's go. That's terrible. That was wrong. Oh, my God.

That counts against both teams. Wait, what? What just happened? Ron's got to drink an extra beer. Ron, did you throw a beer? I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

No, I threw a football. Pretty mean move top to bottom. Ron, stick with the paper airplanes. That's not like you, dude. Your crane's already taken a nap. It was mean, top to bottom. Oh, stick with paper airplanes. That's not like you, dude. Ukraine's already taken a note. It was mean, and I didn't think it would hit like that. And I take with it. This is going to be bad.

I got a note. Oh, you guys are going to get hit with the fucking za, dude. Oh, it's nothing. That's nothing. Are all the notes nothing? Nothing. It's four nothings. How many cupcakes do we need to eat?

Oh, 16. We have three more. Grab me one. Hurry up. Grab me a nice easy one. No, no, no. I mean the one without a note, bro. Can we also talk about the elephant in the room?

What is the elephant in the room? That's how we settled our beef. It's your beer. We got a little cupcake. Can we talk about the elephant in the room for a second? Hold on. I'm soaked. Nick looks fucking awesome with this hair. One cupcake. You're glistening.

One cupcake. Do this. Dude, Nick looks like jacked with this hair. You look like a fucking. Oh, time out. I got a post-it note. We'll be done with cupcakes. Every other team stops drinking for one minute except for ours.

Wait, wait, wait. You heard that? You heard that? Oh, yeah, yeah. Stop drinking. I'm going to pee then. Everyone stop drinking except for us. Yeah, good call, Steven. Steven's yeah. Stop drinking. I'm going to pee then. Everyone stop drinking. Yeah, good call.

Steven's a goddamn brainiac. I'm on cupcakes. What do you call it? I'll say it. Do you want any more beers? I'm sorry. All right, so Nick just spilled an entire beer. I spilled most of their beer.

My judgment's good. I got a football thrown at my face. Who threw the football? Yeah, Rowan. Why did you do that? That was a bold move. This is where it devolves. I didn't know it was going to hit him.

I'm not good at throwing things. Hey, did you buy more beers? She's great. Hey, did did you do that? That was a bold move. It's where it devolves. I didn't know it was going to hit him. I'm not good at throwing things. Hey, did you buy more beers? Hey, did you buy more beers? Or did you just buy... Yeah, go get my gun from my suitcase. Oh, don't get the gun. Get his gun, get his gun, get his gun. No.

Not on YouTube. Guns are an instant demonetized. What if it has an orange... Airsoft? Hey, can you go get us another beer? You know who does guns is Hitchhawk47 Or whatever his name is Nick spilled his beer

He is the fucking man He goes He shoots pots Oh he didn't No no no A full beer was Hey I'm gonna smoke some pots No no no

It wasn't a full beer that was spilled We get it It just splashed a little bit Chaos Oh he's good One beer One beer We only have four beers There wasn't a full beer that was spilled. It just splashed a little bit. Chaos. Oh, he's good. One beer. One beer.

We only have four beers left. TJ, we just had two cupcakes. This is the dumbest. I'm in the shithouse right now. I'm sorry for yelling at you. I didn't mean it. No, no, no. You don't have to. I was an asshole to Nick.

And for what reason? It's the face paint. It's the face paint. And for what reason was it? All right, drinking is legal. TJ. Okay. We're good on cupcakes.

That punishment meant nothing. Nothing, yeah. I really wanted light as a feather, stiff as a board. Our count is good. I really. TJ, three cupcakes. I thought you hadn't counted a cupcake, but I was wrong. You had.

You're doing a great job. Who was that? I'm going to use Big Cat. I'm halfway through another cupcake, by the way. My second. I bet it'll matter. I drank. We had three cupcakes eaten.

It hit me very suddenly about a beer. I think I drank nine beers and I'm on my fourth cupcake. I'm in the shithouse for sure. I think I'm on my fourth cupcake. I'm in the shithouse. I think I'm on my fifth beer. Fifth or sixth? Fifth or sixth beer? Does anyone know? I don't know.

It doesn't matter. Nick, I feel terrible. You just need to make an airplane so you're not throwing footballs. He's wearing a pokey reshirt. He's got a green flag on his face. I know, but now you're in a position where you have to make me feel better, which shouldn't be the position you're in. I should have to make you feel better.

You get four cupcakes. Roan, don't listen for the commenters. Hardly hit me. Hit my cup. Didn't hurt. Okay. Just got a little dab. I just need everyone to be friends.

All for the fun. All right, Roan, you can listen now. That's another cupcake for me, by the way. I'm going to need you to finish your beers right now. Fix the fucking goer Right now Sass Honestly Honestly I'll throw up

Right now Right now If you want to win this I want you to finish your beer right now Nick get to cupcakes Nick get to cupcakes You just told me to finish the beer I can only do one thing at a time

I understand but I've already had four cupcakes Everyone is bullying Nick right now Who's better than Nick? No, no, no. Let's switch it. Who is funnier than Nick? I honestly don't think anyone. Nobody.

Nobody wrong. Nobody is. Honestly, can we all agree? He's the funniest motherfucker. Yeah, he's the goat. He's top dog and also so humble and such a naturally good guy. I don't understand. It's honestly annoying.

It's almost unnatural. Yeah, it's infuriating how much It's almost unnatural. It's infuriating how much he has the juice. It's infuriating. Finish the beer. Finish the beer. And it's not just like off-the-cuff jokes.

It's like spending his time writing jokes. It's off-the-cuff. It's just the general. It's the loose ones. It's the tight ones. Finish the cupcake. I'm going to grab another now.

Goat, bro. I just finished another one. Nick and Peter. So we're at seven cupcakes. No, we're at six cupcakes. Six cupcakes. These are good cupcakes. They are good.

These are good, and I'm glad I have nothing to wash them down with. Oh, yeah. Use it right now. Wait, are you guys done with your beers? We already done with our beers. We already done with our beers. Shut the fuck up. What?

Brother. Sash, you got to wash your beers. They're not done their beers. What the fuck up? What? Brother. They're not done their beer. Nobody drink for two minutes except our team. Nobody drink. Nobody drink for two minutes. No beers for two minutes. I guess I'll have a cupcake. I pulled the karaoke one. Oh, KBS karaoke.

That's the worst person to get it. That's the worst person to get it. I pulled it a while ago. I know somebody caught that on the camera. I can't lie. Holy shit. Brandon, I'm real proud of you. We have got our allotment of cupcakes.

Brandon's team has done a cupcake. I just had a cupcake. He just drank a beer as well. I think we might have skipped one earlier. Yeah, I'm a cupcake pussy, I guess. I'm going to go pee. I did another cupcake, TJ. TJ, we're at eight cupcakes.

Eight cupcakes, TJ. We're going to win. I just did my sixth. You guys can't drink. I can't drink my beer, bro. No, but I just did my sixth cupcake, bro. Oh, jeez. Oh, Lord.

This is a two-team race. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I'm gonna watch. At this point, dude, I know I'm a pussy. Cupcake done. Cupcake done's up. Here we go, Nick.

Keep going. I'll watch him. Sass, I'm gonna do another cupcake for you. I'm gonna finish mine. No, no, no, no, no, no. Hey, hey, hey, hey. There's a whole ass note.

Whole ass note. Shane, how are we doing on beers? CJ, we're 18. No. Oh, hey. There's a whole last note. Whole last note. Shane, how are we doing on beers? CJ, we're at 18. No. Oh, no. Ukraine. We're at 18. That's from Vladimir Putin, you fucking traitor.

Everyone's getting to that level. We're done with beers, motherfucker. We're done with beers. What does your say? What does that mean? We're done with beers. Sass is a beer right there. You better replace cupcakes then.

Sass is a beer on his desk. Actually, I can't say shit to Nick, dude. I just... I'm drinking a Zodbeers. We're done with beer. Sass is a beer right there. You better replace cupcakes then. Sass is a beer on his desk. Actually, I can't say shit to Nick, dude. I just... I'm drinking a Zodbeer too. I respect you so goddamn much. I finished cupcake, by the way. We got one more cupcake. We got one more cupcake.

You guys added in? How many beers we got left? What? I have two cans and this. Okay. I got one can in this. I have this sip and that's a beer. Okay.

I finished cupcake. Dude, the worst part about this is it's 7-15. It's time for us to operate. Yeah, let's go. Let's go, Dr. Gillis. That was weird. I didn't like that. I want to be off this team.

Let's go, Dr. Gillis. That was sexual. We were once enemies. We're united. Yes, Steven. That made me aroused. Drinking resume. All right, all right.

Time's up, time's up. We're fucked. 14 and 9. Permission granted, Dr. Gillis. Okay, we got this. Let's finish strong. This is my fifth cupcake. Holy shit, Nikki.

Totally unnecessary. That a boy. You're disgusting. Danger. Danger. Okay. Wait, we can... Wait, what did you say?

Ooh. I didn't say anything. I was laughing at Sassage. CJ. Ooh, brother. What's up, Brandon? Please be the best. I just drank a beer.

I hate to say that Brandon's in his fucking... Case race wheel. Fuck! What's this? All right, spin case race wheel. I can't do anything. Oh, God. You've done all you can, brother.

Light as a feather, stiff as a board. Light as a feather, stiff as a board. Seventh cupcake, bro. This applies to Big Cat. Beer, beer. We're done with our beer. You guys have to drink his odd beer. You guys have to drink his odd beer.

Yeah, I'll drink his odd beer. That's fine. Just spit it. This is 24. We're done with beers. We're done with beers. That's what you got? Ten push-ups, ten sit-ups, ten dips.

Go. For the whole team or for just Big Cat? I want to eat another cupcake. Ten, ten, ten. I want to eat another cupcake. I want to eat another cupcake. Oh, fuck. Ten push-ups is the easiest.

Ten push-ups. For the whole team? No, no, don't. Don't actually. I'll grab more myself. Two, three, four. Don't spread'll grab one myself. Two, three, four, five. No, it's not.

Big Cat, don't listen to them. Six, seven, eight, nine, ten. No one needs to anchor him for the sit-ups. Someone needs to anchor his feet. Okay. I'll grab a cupcake.

Big Cat, how bad do you feel? Honestly, I'm so jealous of Nick's inherent sensitivity that he has. I just don't know how he has this all built into who he is. It's just so goddamn impressive. You're going to fart? Yeah. I'm using the fart mic. Don't take my mic, I'm using the fart mic. Hold on.

I'm going to use that. Hold on. Do not take my mic. I'm using it. No. I'm using the mic. How many sit-ups is that? No, seven.

Three more. Eight. One. Give me the fart mic, Brandon. No. Give me it. Give me it. This is my mic.

Game. I think the most shocking part about this is that you're having a harder time doing sit-ups than push-ups. And then 10 dips. Dude, where are you even going to do the dips? Big Hat, do the dips off the cooler. He's wasting most of the cupcakes. You're done.

Now you just need dips. Now look at that cupcake. Look at the most cupcakes on the floor. I'll be honest. I just chugged a bunch of beers. I'm fucked up. Yeah, I'm fucked up. I still got one more and then we're done. All I want to do is karaoke. chugged a bunch of beers. I'm fucked up. Yeah, I'm fucked up. I still got one more, and then we're done, dude.

All I want to do is karaoke. Steven, we're one and done, baby. Finish it so we can do karaoke. Oh, fuck. I wish I knew how many. I didn't count. You guys got to eat four cupcakes? Come on, guys.

You have one. You have one, Sass. No, just stop. Wait, wait, wait. Why? You're going to win so bad. Wait, why is that? We need to go. Wait. Wait, wait, wait. Why? They're going to win so bad. Wait, why is that? We need to go.

Wait, why is that getting the beer ready? We're going to win. They got the beer one. They have to drink his beer to finish. They're at 36. They're going to catch us. Oh, my God. Me and Steve are going to cheers.

All right, here we go. Steven. Here it is. Oh, he got it. Oh, oh, oh, oh. Hurry. Big up. Big up.

We need you up good. Big up. We need you up good. Go. You can up. We need cupcakes. Pick up. We need cupcakes. You can stop. You can stop. One more. One more. That's a wrap.

That's a wrap. That's a wrap. That's a wrap. That's a win. That's a win. That's a win for Team Che. Holy shit. Walker.

Team Gillis. Well, can we still keep going? I didn't think we could do this, dude. My dad watches YouTube and he thinks I have a problem. Hey. Holy shit. Walker, Team Gillis. Well, can we still keep going? A lot of guys didn't think we could do this, dude. My dad watches YouTube and he thinks I have a problem. Shout out to my dad, dude. Shout out, Phil. That's dead.

That was a performance. A lot of guys are watching the internet saying things like, that's fucked up. That's actually not cool. I had a stepdad. He's dead, too. Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. They both died last year. Big Cat, how did your team get 13 cupcakes? I just drank another. I had a stepdad. He's dead, too. Wait, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. They both died last year.

Big Cat, how did your team get 13 cupcakes? Dude, I just drank another. I just drank another. They didn't win. They didn't win. They won. I'm not going to. You love the yak, though.

No one's drinking that, bro. No one's drinking that shit. Oh, don't drink that, Nick. Nick. All right, all right. Zod, give me it. There's no shame in coming in third. Listen, I'm not going to blame anyone. Fucking Sass let me down again. That's what will to blame anyone, but fucking Sass let me down again.

Sass will fuck you up. Sass, you let me down again. Holy shit, Roan. Holy shit. That's the case. That's the case. Oh, I don't want Roan to have that. With your funny ass? Yes, I ate fucking.

Dude, I ate. It smells like peanut butter. It smells like a peanut butter. I ate eight cupcakes and nine beers, bro I'm sorry, man Obviously No, dude I tried my best

That's the worst part is I tried my best That's fucked up I ate eight cupcakes and fucking nine beers If that's the worst part, dude Just drill me in the comments Oh my god It tastes so bad Wait, hold on

I want to try it Drill me in the comments Because I am sorry, guys No, fuck that, Sass. I want to try it. Oh, my God. Tell me in the comments because I am sorry, guys. No. Fuck that, Sass. You didn't try. I tried my hardest. I tried my hardest. Oh, bro.

You stopped trying. At least my mama still left. You don't work hard, bro. You don't work hard. See what I did? For now. Dude, you see me doing fucking push-ups and sit-ups and eating cupcakes? That's what guys who cared do.

Yeah. That's how we get off. Oh, that's so bad. I'm sorry. Shane, you know I respect that. That's how... Big Cat. Big Cat,'s so bad. I'm sorry. Shane, you know I respect that. Thank you for that. That's how, Cass, big cat,

big cat, you know you're my idol. Cass, you keep complaining about not making millions. You see guys make millions, bro. I agree.

I see it. You see the work? You know what I say? I see it and I say, you know what? I haven't earned it. That's what I say. Nick fucking shoved that haven't earned it. That's what I say. Nick fucking shoved that cupcake down my throat.

I know. I saw. Nick supported Ukraine for you. Yeah. I look like an idiot for you supporting a losing side. You know what? I am the – coming out of this, I am the worst. Wait, I ate ten cupcakes.

I am the loser. No, no, no. I am the worst one. No, I am the worst one. No, no, no. I am the worst one. No, I am the worst one. That's true. We all agree we're all the worst. Thrill me in the comments. That's bad.

I am the worst one. I am the worst one. I am the worst one. I disrespected. I am the worst one, and I feel bad. I let my team down, and I am okay admitting it. No, no, I'm not okay with it. Shane, I think you're fantastic.

Can you do this, Dad? Who is the worst? No way Sal is actually drinking. You know why I'm not okay with it? It, I think you're fantastic. Can you do this, Dad? Who is the worst? I'm happy that your podcast is actually drinking. You know why I'm not okay with it? It's like paper mache water. I have a belly full of nine beers and fucking nine cupcakes. That's why I'm not okay with it. And you know what?

I am upset about that, and I'll talk to someone and I'll fix that. Hey, big cat, why don't you give him a million dollars and shut up? Yeah. Go ask Dave for that ring. I'll sit my ass down and I'll listen. You better. I'm fucking ring. I'll sit my ass down and I'll listen. You better. I'm fucking better. I need another beer.

You want me to stop talking? I'll stop talking. Here, here. We got plenty of them because we didn't. Congrats to Che, Brandon, and Che. What a performance. All right, let's get fucked up and let's keep looking. Oh, fuck you, Sash.

You fucking fuck. You know who impressed me? Brandon Walker. Nick. Yes, Brandon. Shout out you, dude. You know who impressed me? Brandon Walker. Nick. Yes, Brandon. Shout out you, dude. You fucking put your balls to the wall. Shout out Nick.

Shout out Nick. Shout out Nick. Shout out Ukraine. You got me going. You got me pissed. Who's stopping us at 40, honestly? Fuck the fuck up, Che. No one.

Dude. So we need this. This show needs to go to eight, so I'll drink more. Nick, you fucking hate your way backstage. Yeah, you guys should drink. This is the fun part. Can I get another beer? I'm still drinking.

I'm still drinking. Can I get some Lomo's? Get some fucking beers. No, we have a cheesesteak. My cheesesteak's coming, yeah. They're here. Oh, they're here. Let's fucking eat.

Jellicle cats and jellicles. Oh, I want to say it. By the way, KBO owes us a karaoke song. Karaoke. What do you want to do? KB, you want to do a duet? Pick your poison, Slime. KB's focusing on not dying.

No, no, we'll let KB, since this is his birthday, he can pick a partner to sing with. What the fuck? I've been battling. I've had the worst time than you guys. Why? Harder time. Hey, you're on so much mushrooms.

He's on the verge of death right now. It's a terrible combo. But no, I'll do it solo. Probably The Fray. Yeah. Able Car. Able Car. Oh, boy.

Or You Found Me. Probably that. You found me lying on the floor. Come on, bro. You make every song Bob Dylan. I do. I love Dylan. Lying on the floor. You're, bro. You make every song Bob Dylan. I do. I love Dylan. I ain't known.

You're kind of a Bob Dylan guy. I will say, when Bob Dylan dies, I am killing myself. Saz is a bit of a Bob Dylan guy, dude. Yeah. You see it? You just said he was going to end his life. Hey, guys, what do you think about this? Is this funny?

Do you guys really think that? Do you really think that? This guy stinks. Who's propping him up? Why is this good? And it was you the entire time. Hey guys, shots fired. I accept them at all costs.

Okay? Wait, Sass, have you seen this thing that you do on stage when you're like, hey, I've seen a lot of people talking about the news. I don't do that anymore, bro. No? I think I saw it last weekend. You just crossed all lines. And I think I know who you got it from because... I don't do that anymore.

Pretty famous thing to do. What's that? It's you, dude. You know what it is. He does your mannerisms on stage, dude. He stole you. He stole you from you. That's fine. Because it's famous. Everybody steals from everybody. Who'd you take it from? So the problem is that now Roan's got me age, dude. He stole you. He stole you from you. It's fine. Because it's famous. Everybody steals from everybody. Who'd you take it from?

So the problem is that now Roan's got me in a pickle. To agree or to disagree? I don't know. My whole plan was to agree with everyone, and now he's got me in a pickle. And you know what I'm going to say? Roan, hey, you're right. Hey, it's cool. You know I respect the hell out of you.

You know I respect the hell out of you You know I respect The hell out of you I said dude You know I love that about you I said dude On the yak I got a DM That said gillis much I'm gonna be honest

Guys I'm gonna be honest We got tickets on sale In Denver There's an extra show You gotta stop Or I'm gonna Beat your ass Beat him up

Beat him up Beat my ass I deserve it I deserve it I'm falling all the way back i'm falling all the way back i respect everyone in this room maybe i want to know your mindset um yeah this was this was a lot better i think no no i definitely was i know i was an asshole i know this no i think stop it ron in there put him in there put in Rone, you didn't hit my face, buddy.

But can I ask? Steve and Jay's unit, dude. Guys, now we got like two hours to just have fun. I'm just a unit. Actually, Rone, I'll forgive you if you shotgun a beer.

Alright, let's do it. Jay, how many beers did you drink? Nick, let's order some Yayo. beers did you drink? Let's order some Yayo. Go grab all the beers. Put them in the cooler. Am I being annoying? I apologize for being annoying. I would do some. Let's do it.

Let's order a bunch of Coke and let's shotgun a beer. I'm cool. I don't even have to drink. I just want my boys to drink beer. I want my boys to have a fun night. So we were actually at 15 cupcakes or drink beer. You ate seven? I want my boys to have a fun night. That would rule. So we were actually at 15 cupcakes, or 14 cupcakes. You guys were close.

And Sass just didn't eat any. I lied. I had six. I drank three cupcakes. Sass. Yeah. What was going on? Did I mess up the words? You said I drank three cupcakes. Did I mess up the words? I apologize.

I have about five minutes left of conversation. Looks like Shane's got a speech. What? Did I overstep that? Did I overstep my boundaries? That's good. That's on me. I like you a little. Don't make me like you less, bro.

No swag? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Is that on me or is that on KB? No, no, no. I'm saying when it came down to, I mean, I've never seen just communication between me and Steven. It was unbelievable, dude. It was infuriating.

We were one away. Wait, you guys dapped each other up? The way that Brandon fell asleep after? Brandon munched cupcakes, dude. He did, he did. Unreal. Munched them. And then me and Steven, I was like, dude, the second you guys got close, it was like.

It was. Dude, me and Steven were making eye contact, like, let's go. Yeah. Let's go. You guys destroyed us, and I'll be the first. No, no, no. Sass. Jesus Christ.

They destroyed you. No, they destroyed us. We're a team. I'll be the first to say it. I'm your team. There was nobody that was going to win. Sass let us down. Sass ate one more cupcake.

Who would have won? No, no. You guys were that close. Nothing? We were that close. I was looking at the numbers. I want to apologize to my team, and I want to thank the other teams. I don't want to apologize.

I want to thank the other teams. I mean, you guys put on a hell of a performance. Sass, you had two beers, and you act like a little pussy. I know. I know. Hey, no. Hey, hey, hey. Shane.

Sass is killing it. You're right. You're right. I think I had maybe two. I might have had less than two. Sass, you're killing it. No, Sass, you just took a sip of mine. I don't think I only had a sip.

One sip of mine. I had no cupcakes. I let my team down. You guys tear me up in the comments. I had no cupcakes. I let my team down. Tear me up in the comments. I'm the one that deserves it. I want to have diarrhea. Brandon, I wish

that was me going diarrhea instead of you because I'm the one that deserves it. Don't do that. Brandon, I wish you would just diarrhea right in my mouth. I won't. Go have a solid ass shit dedicated to Brando. I just want to in my mouth. I won't. Go have a solid ass shit dedicated to Brando. I just want to do what everyone thinks I should do. Big Cat, what are you doing?

Peel yourself. What are you, Britney? Wait, can we- I'll be in your experience if you want me to be Britney Spears. Guys, I'm just so sick of the comments, man. I love the commenters. Shut up for a second, Sam. Here we go.

Hold on. Let me say this. Shut up for a second, Sass. Here we go. Shut up for a second. Let me say this one second. Yo, I'm making so much money doing what I do. Don't like the comments, man. I can't keep up with the comments. That's right, you're at me. Yeah, that's you.

You're at me. Guys, I'm – Shut up, Sass. I'm – If I got out of my place there, I apologize. Sass is in his bag. He's killing – I love this! I'm sorry. If I got out of my place there, I apologize. Sass is in his bag. He's killing it. I love this. I am sorry.

I am sorry. Sass, shut up for one second. Can we still do light as a feather? I actually want to. With Kate? I want to do it. Can we spin a wheel? Yeah!

No, no, no, no, no, no, no. We got to spin for who it is. We spin the wheel for who it is. Okay, all right, fair. I want to do that the minute you said that. Yep. You got to do it. When I was in middle school, this was the-

Oh, it's on. There's no way. I don't believe it works. Hold on, TJ. I want it to- Show David Blaine putting Shaq over his house. What's David Blaine? Chris Angel.

Chris Angel. That will show you. Watch that video. Oh, that's- It doesn't work. That's real Blaine. Chris Angel. That will show you. Watch that video. Oh, that's so... It doesn't work. That's real, isn't it? Yeah. It's real as fuck.

The word was probably I was about to say it was fake and then I heard bacon. Watch this. Watch this shit. This is what we're gonna do. This is literally

what we're about to do. It's gonna look the same. As long as we're evenly spread out. Look at this shit. That flavor of flame? Well, that's not what we're going to do. Obviously, that's not going to happen.

It's going to be one of us laying on the ground. Look at him. Dude, he goes over the house. Is that Angel? Or Shaq? That's Shaq. That's the diesel? He is light as a feather, isn't he?

Wait, was that I got a good thought How many times Flavor Flav is Labragasted At all times Every all day he's like Yo Bridget Nielsen wants to fuck me

Nothing happens he's like Whoa His car starts He sees Shaq flying He's like, whoa. His car starts. He sees Shaq flying. He's like, oh. That's another thing I can't really totally comprehend. So can we get a wheel with all our names to pick who is the one that we pick?

Before we need to do that, we lost in a crushing way. What do you mean? By one or two cupcakes. We did. We did, certainly. I need to see that tiny little guy at Carl's. Thank you. We've been talking to that guy for like an hour. Put did. We did, certainly. I need to see that tiny little guy at Carl's. Thank you. I've been a tiny guy for like an hour. Put him up.

Put him up. Now I'm kind of vibing with him. I like him. Heavy. Why? He looks bigger now. His face is the size of a goat. Did he get bigger?

He's keeping his hands to himself. He wants a picture, and he went home. It's so nice. Carl's Jr. has a hell of a burger, too. Are we sure these bitches aren't huge? They might be fucking amateurs. I'm so pissed the Lakers sent the giant bitches. Love the Frisco burger.

If I may quickly interject, this show is brought to you by Ridgewalt, the ultra-slim, minimalist Can I give it a couple colors? Che, let me give it a couple colors. Yes, yes. When I get that, I'm going to cue you up. Burnt titanium? It holds up to 12 cards, plus room for cash. There it a couple colors. Yes, yes. When I get that, I'm going to cue you up. Burnt titanium? It holds up to 12 cards plus room for cash. There's over 30 colors, including...

Sass. Burnt titanium and... Carbon? Carbon fiber. There you go. Sass, let me just say you're crushing this episode. It's made with RFID blocking technology... I appreciate that. I appreciate the hell out of you.

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slash Yak and use and use code Yak for 10% off. Stop, Sasha. Hit him. That's Y-A-K. They cut my mic. Those bastards, they cut my mic. Rage.com slash Yak. Use code Yak. Go to Rage.com. Use code yak. Go to rage.com slash yak.

I can't believe. Was I overstepping my boundaries? I'm going to wish you talked less tomorrow, brother. I'll step back. I'm going to go ahead. I'm going to fulfill my duties of my job. Shut up. I'm going to go ahead.

I'm going to say rage.com slash yak. Go take a piss. Use code yak and you can get 10% off. You can get burnt titanium and carbon fiber. I've said it before. These are my two favorite colors on the rainbow. Pass. Go take a piss.

You suck, dude. No, no, no. Brother, if you think I suck, I will step all the way back. I'm going to overrule all you guys. Sass was great on that. Yes, he was great. Thank you, Chaz. Chaz. What did you say, motherfucker? I said I'm going to overrule all you guys. Sass was great on that. Yes, he was great. Thank you, Chase. Chase.

What did you say, motherfucker? I said I'm going to overrule all you guys. Oh, no. You want to show it? You want to show it? Give me my noodles. I apologize if I overstepped my boundaries. Sass, just-

That's the last thing I'm trying to do right now. How about I do a helium balloon? Take a- I will. Can we lift somebody or what? Yeah, yeah, let's- One minute break, Sass. Can we pick who we're lifting? Let's lift him. Let's lift him Can we lift somebody or what? Yeah, yeah. Five minute break, Sass. Can we pick who we're lifting?

Let's lift him up. Are you doing helium? Kate, give me ten minutes. Are you dumb as shit? Do you think light as a feather, stiff as a board

has worked ever once? Let's try with the lightest and the worst. Don't call Kate's dumb. All right, listen to her idea. Holy shit. Oh yeah,

that was a vibe. I actually didn't know who that was. Shane, next time you call Kate dumb, I'm going to come at your ass. Do you really want to do this again? Do you really want to do this again? I'm going to do a Joey show. Out and about.

When was the last time you got pegged? I fucking blew it. Everyone keep doing it, everyone. Shane, did I tell you I'm best friends with Snooki? What I'm going to have you do is I'm going to need you to step all the way back. You're not even on it. Sass wasn't on it.

Of course Sass was not even on it. That was just gay Sass. Fucking bitch ass. Sass got placeboed by helium. I am the bitch. Sass is just sucking. Sass just got caught up for not actually inhaling. I suck. I am the bitch.. Sass is just sucking. Sass just got caught up for naught and actually inhaled it. All I mean, I suck.

I suck. I am the bitch loser. No, no, no, no, no, no. Sass, don't say that. You just drank a whole bottle of Sassoli air. Guys, everyone come at me. No, no, no, no. Sass, I am a bitch loser.

This dude's out of control. Keep doing the helium. If I'm not, I will say I'm not. You're on helium. It sounds like it. Yeah, keep doing the helium, please. I will. Sass, just shut the fuck up. All right, I will say I'm not. You're on helium. It sounds like it. Keep doing the helium, please. Shut the fuck up. All right, I will.

10 minutes. 10 minutes to time out. That's just the new character, T-Sass. Guys, I am a bitch, Liz. You got to go right after it like this. All right, I respect it. I respect all angles. I heard they're going to kill the 49ers this weekend.

That was a Trump. That was a little bit of a Trump. That wasn't a Trumpy. What? You're going to kill the 49ers. You're fired. Oh, helium Trump? Helium Trump?

Oh, do it. I don't even know where the hole is. Get him another balloon. Get him another balloon. In there, brother. The fuck is the hole in this thing? I heard that a couple times. The 49ers. We've got Philadelphia.

What a tough team. What a great bunch of guys. Tough guys. Strong guys. Black guys. A lot of black guys. Arsenal Sports You guys want to hear something gay as fuck? Oh shit

Shut up Shut up Shut the fuck up Jesus Christ Alright I cut out of my team He hasn't told one story He hasn't told one story And that's He hasn't told one story, dude. And that's on me.

And that's on me. I take all the blame for that. You should mute his mic. Wait, wait. He put the bait in front of us. TJ, mute my mic. You guys want to hear something gay as fuck. Yeah.

Yeah, I do. No, you don't. And I'm going to respect that 10-minute timeout. Shut the fuck up. Guys, it's about time that white men sit down and listen. And shut up. And I'm going to sit down. But it's Mike. Wait. Yo, what's about time that white men sit down and listen. And shut up. I'm going to sit down. But it's Mike.

Wait. Yo, what's wrong with you, bro? Brandon's been dying laughing over the last- Just show up. Get a baker's dozen cupcakes. Laughing. There's nothing there, boy. Laughing so hard it's done something to me, and now both sides are cramping up really,

really bad. Yeah, dude. You've had 13 cupcakes. So many cupcakes. Brandon. If he dies, we win, right? Can I say something fucked up? I don't know how he did that.

I picture, like, no offense, I picture you actually, like, in serious medical distress tonight and the ambulance comes to pick you up and they're like, oh, no. They don't take you seriously because you look like Jellicle Cat. I will say this, though. For real, though, you do have hair of a guy who does get cat's face paint. Yes.

You have the perfect hair for the cat's face paint. It feels natural. It feels good. It's so nice. That was the meanest thing in the world. I thought it was nice. No, it's Josh McCown hair. It's very Josh McCown.

Very good, dude. It's like, yeah. We watched the Josh McCown clip. To be honest, I got to ask you. Where do you get that shit? Watch the highlight vids? You look so small. Look at that. Can I see it?

No no no Time out I have some Cam Hartman Wake Forest highlights Why does it look flat? No before we do anything We gotta do

Light is a feather stiff Before we figure out Who we're doing Alright we're doing you Cause you're the lightest No no no Shane have you ever Seen the anti-masturbation

It's me I'm literally not Laying down Have you ever seen The anti-masturbation? It's me. I'm literally not laying down. Have you ever seen the anti-masturbation Josh McCown clip? No. Funny as fire. Josh McCown's a great dude. Fired up.

I hung out with him. Great fucking dude. Former Eagle. But, yeah, bear for life. Everyone wanted him over Jay Cutler for a year. You got to pull up that clip, TJ. He lined about wide out for the birds. He was like, I'll fuck. We were down on wide outs. He was like, TJ He lined about wide out for the birds He was like I'll fuck

We were down on wide outs He was like I'll line about wide out Bro he was our fucking X receiver I'm not just saying this The game he played against the Cowboys For the Bears on Thursday night football Was maybe the perfect game of football That any quarterback has ever played

Facts He was so good He has it in him Well he's an athlete He is He's a real athlete Just like Brandon Kinda like Brandon I need you to see this ever played. Facts. He has that. He was so good. Well, he's an athlete. He is. He's a real athlete. Just like Brandon.

Kind of like Brandon. I need you to see this, Shane. You're a real athlete. Oshkosh County anti-masturbation. Yo, is Brandon like, are you like a fucked up dude? He's honestly the man. Yeah. Seems like that.

That's why. He's very intelligent. Brandon will have the best show he's ever had of his life, and then he'll text us afterwards. He was like, I just can't keep up with you boys. Sorry. Yeah, he'll apologize.

Be like, dude, what? I can't believe I've done this. I don't belong on this show. Water's helping. Shut up. Sass is gone. Sass is funny, though. He literally said all week, I'm not going to try to talk too much.

I need a Yak fan to do like a word count. I will say this. When you're sober, it's so hard to jump into a conversation. It is? Yeah, it's really hard. You're on mushrooms. Yeah, I'm chilling. I'm feeling great.

Now that I'm off the cupcakes. How much did you take? Legal. Three. Three squares? Why did you come hug me? Oh, my God, bro. Legal. Because he's on mushrooms. Fuck with you.? Legal. Three. Three squares? Why did you come hug me? Legal. Because he's on mushrooms.

Fuck with you. You're my boy. No, he's on mushrooms. We were sharing a laugh about a similar thing. Oh, he hugged you? He's on mushrooms. Look at those flowers on your forehead, dude. Did you find that clip?

I did one square. It's when you have tattoos. What the fuck? It's when you have tattoos What the fuck? It's when I forgot about them Holy shit Are those temp tats? Yeah

Wait but like Kyle When did you do that? In the bathroom A little bit ago You guys were so drunk Holy shit You look awesome You look badass You look awesome. You look badass.

You look jacked. You got to do that. I feel like wrestlers should get some scholarships. Wow. It was never about wrestlers. It was kind of, dude. I mean, it was about the rest of the sport. All non-football sports.

I don't care. Do you think wrestlers sell as many tickets as the Mac? This is not the argument, no. The Mac? We sold nothing. We deserve zero. Mac football sells more tickets than all of wrestling ever combined. Is that a skull tattoo?

Iowa wrestling. Yeah, Delos Mortis. Has anybody had a sip of that disgusting beer? Yeah, it's horrible. Yes, it's so bad. I want a new beer. Where are the new beers? You got to try it, Shane.

Wait, play this for Shane. Play this Joshua Cow clip for Shane. I'd like that. To actually meet up with Craig to do a corn and pancakes there and to share my story. And we landed, and when we landed, you know, the boom comes on and the lady comes on and she says, welcome to Detroit. And everybody, you know,

immediately their heads pop up and everybody's going, what? You know, and and, you know, everybody kind of laughs. She says, excuse me, St. Louis, you know, and so we all kind of had a laugh. But what it revealed to me was that that's what porn is a lot like. You go somewhere that you weren't expected to go and you end up with that feeling of, what? Where am I? And I can tell you countless times that I've sat at my computer looking at something, going through websites before, and sitting there going, wait, where am I? Who is this guy? It's time to post that clarity.

Why the hell is my dick in my hand? You end up being somewhere where you don't want to be. Watch this white shit all over my leg. Big Cat, I know you're against it. I want to see five more people at Carl's Jr. Oh, let's go through the whole thing. Yeah, let's go through the whole thing. We need five more people.

Just five more people going to Carl's. Yeah, fuck it. Dude, wait. So what was that interview he was giving? No, it's anti-porn PSA. He's just like, wait, I'm not this guy. Yeah, he's like, I wake up with my dick in my hand. Yeah, we all do that. I found myself fucking post-cortal

Malay. He literally had post-nut clarity. He was like, I gotta make a PSA about this. I have relatives who've donated to anti-porn. Really? They're like, yeah. Cash? What are you donating? No, no, no. What makes the world go round?

Does it help you mentally and shit if you abstain from masturbation? Bro, you need to talk to Matt. I don't think so. You need to talk to Matt for real. Who are you looking at? People tell me it's like the cold tubs. It really helps you. Your co-host is a McCusker, but McCusker was going hard at porn, though.

Oh. Okay. He'll watch it. He'll watch it. He'll be like, all porn, though. Oh. Okay. He'll watch it. He'll watch it for like, he'll be like, all right, I found a good porn. I'm going to watch. He'll watch it. He'll watch the whole thing. That's crazy.

So. Start to think. He got to fucking scroll. He was going hard. Anti-porn is a big thing right now. You go dick suck, and then like. I skip past. Go ahead.

I skip past head. Okay. Well, they show you the little mountains and valleys. You see where to go. Dude, I know dudes whack off for like an hour. That's crazy. What? Yeah, there's a lot of dudes that whack off for like a long time.

I have samurai focus. You got to think the reason you guys don't is because you don't have enough willpower to keep it going. No, no, no, no. All right. I've done some sessions. i've done some sessions and maybe he's in the dojo for fucking four hours eating off somebody anybody can watch porn for a long time it doesn't mean you you have willpower i mean you're jacking off for the whole three you you got to keep edging yourself and stopping. Stopping. You're in heaven for an hour. If you're on Matt. If you're on Matt. Steven.

Jay just raised his hand. You edge? No, I'm just like, whoa, an hour. Dude, that's fucking crazy. Yo, 10 minutes. Max, get out of there. In and out. I knew I liked this guy.

Jay's actually the best pussy eater in America. In America, yes. Whoa. That's a video. Tell him. I mean, you need confessionals? You need tutorials? No, I don't. Whoa. That's a video. Tell them. I mean, you need confessionals? You need tutorials?

No, I don't need it. Is it a topic? I don't want any problems with you, big stuff. I mean, I like to eat pussy. There's no crime in that. Sir, you're under arrest. Hey, why are you so calm

and collected? I am. You're wasted right now. Dude, have you eaten pussies a crime? Why are you guys so riled up? A case going to death for us. Yeah, you're good. I'm? I am. You're a wasted right now. You're a beaten pussy's a crime? Why are you going so riled up? A cage going to death for us. I'm with you.

It was a crime. Is it a time thing for you? Is that why you're so good? Is it a time thing? No. She comes fast? What's the technique? Is it tongue dexterity?

Don't sweat the technique. Wait, you're actually very good at eating. He thinks he's the best. I am the best. Literally. You're saying good at eating pussy? He thinks he's the best. I am the best. Literally. You're saying you're the best? He thinks he's the best. Not as a term.

That's not crazy. I mean, I like to eat pussy. It's not a discussion. He's the best. Only one way to find out. He's the best. Don't even question it. Give us bullet points, though.

Why are you? I love eating cookies. No, no. We're on the same page. Che, would you say you're top ten in the world? Oh, man. Oh, man. Dude, we're talking about fucking, like, guys in Espana. You're considering top ten in the world?

No, top percentage. Percentage. Percentage. Why'd you go to Spain? Percentile for sure. 100%. Wait. Why'd you go to Spain? Percentile for sure. 100%. Wait, why'd you go to Spain there? On Pepe Che, man.

They roll their R's. You're talking about guys in España? España, they got the lisp, they roll R's, yeah. Yeah, absolutely. Actually makes sense. España eats the best pussy. So guys with lisps eat pussy? I'd imagine they eat it better.

Top 10% of the world, 100%. He's top 10% pussy eater. In the world. I mean, top 1%? And fellas, if you're not... I don't know. Come on, my boy. I don't know why I'm measuring.

Some entire... Come on, guys. Don't even do it. That's fucked up, guys who don't do it. You're working with fucking low tides. That is fucked up, guys who don't do it. I'm not racist. I wouldn't say something like that.

You know who doesn't do it? Moroccan guys. It's guys from Morocco. You know who doesn't do it? Moroccan guys. It's guys from Morocco. DJ Khaled doesn't do it. Oh. He doesn't. That's fucked up. The Russians.

Russian men don't do it. French Montana. Oh, Russia. Jackie doesn't eat pussy? French Montana doesn't eat pussy. Oh, the Arabs don't. Come on. Arabs don't.

Who's Becky's? No. Who's Becky's don't? No whistle. A lot of Muslim bros. That's crazy. You've got to eat it. What about Asian culture?

West Africans. West Africans don't eat it, sir? No. Damn. Never? Most masculine cultures don't eat it. Yeah, they don't. Bump me up.

Top five percent. We're betas? We're betas for eating pussies. You can put some on your penis. Then be a beta, fellas. Be a beta and eat that pussy When you say that it makes me Not want to eat pussy I know I don't want to eat pussy

You don't want to eat pussy Eat my pussy When women say it It's a real negative Why won't you eat my pussy When women say it It's a real negative Yeah Why won't you eat my pussy Would a 35 year old mom Dress like a fish

Says it No It probably doesn't help Doesn't help at all No No That was a personal attack Hey

Let's Let's Let's spin the wheel For who's lighter than the better Okay Yeah Anyway I want to try it

Can we get five more Hardys guys Carl's Jr. Oh yeah We want five more Carl's. Yeah, give us. All right. And then we'll do it. We're picking this guy up, person up?

We're picking up. Oh, fuck. God. Oh, no. It's sass. That's KP. No, give it to sass. Let's go.

You want to do it? I mean, no, but I will for this. All right. I can talk now. All right, I can talk now. I took my ten minutes off of talking. I don't know if you guys noticed that or not. Shut the fuck up. I did.

Do you want me to take ten more? Do you want me to take ten more? Do you want me to take ten more? You're not funny enough to be this annoying. I'll take ten more, brother. I love you, bro. I love you, bro. I love you, too. Brother, if you think I'm not funny enough,

you want me to leave? I'll go home. I'll go home. For the viewers at home, Brandon is afraid of balloons. Shane, come on. Ready? Light as a feather, stiff as a board. Light as a feather, stiff as a board. Light as a feather. Shane, come on. Ready? Light as a feather, stiff as a board. Light as a feather.

We got him. We got him. Light as a feather, stiff as a board. Now make him levitate over the house like Shaq. Light as a feather, stiff as a board. Light as a feather, stiff as a board. What the fuck? Wait, let's do Brandon. Let's do Brandon. Oh, God. Let's do Brandon. the house like Shaq. more people towards the top end. Why? Why does a feather stick to the board? That was so easy. Why does a feather stick to the board? Wait, everyone needs to come up here.

Come on, help. Why does a feather stick to the board? Why does a feather stick to the board? Stiff, stiff, stiff. Stiff is the board. Why does a feather stick to the board? Why does a feather stick to the board? Why does a feather stick to the board? All right, all right, all right. No, no, no. We got to get you back. We've never seen something like this before. Fuck you.

Fuck you, KB. Fuck you. Bitch ass. Two fingies. Two fingies only, but everyone's obviously head to the top. Shane, we need you on the lifting side. He's way too fat. No, he's not.

He's not. Brother, he's flat as a feather. He's flat as a feather. Ready? One, two, three. Ready? Yeah! Oh!

We did it. We did it. Why is he wet? Why is he wet? He's so wet. His whole body is wet. Why? Got him off the ground, but he's soaked. We picked up KB so wet. His whole body is wet. Why? Got him off the ground, but he's soaked.

We picked up KB so easily. I got wet touching him. Why? Sorry, I'm being loud. Oh, fuck. I don't know why. He's sopping. He's sopping.

He's soaking wet. That shit was amazing. My hands are soaked. The back of my robe, I swear to God, got soaked touching this guy. How? While we were lifting him up, I was like, KB, remember when you God, got soaked touching this guy. I just, I just, I just, how? While we were lifting him up,

I was like, KB, remember you talking shit, you piece of shit? He was like, you're gonna die, you fat piece of shit. You're hurling towards an early grave.

What an evil motherfucker. KB's a bad man. Dude, evil fuck. That's the best case scenario for comedians. Die? Die like an alcohol related disease. No, no, it's not. No, for comedians. Die? Die like an alcohol-related disease.

No, it's not. No, it's not. Ate her in life. You have a hell of a career. You get all your flowers. Who are you talking about? Dude, if you... Chan. No, it's not. That's not ideal. That's not ideal.

I'm saying it's not a bad life. No, it's not ideal. All the wrestlers. All the wrestlers die of, like, steroids or getting shot by a gay guy at DuPont. It's always a gay guy at DuPont. Remember how wrestlers die? It's always that guy. Analysts.

It's always Steve Carell closeted at DuPont. The fucking fox catcher. Has a wrestler died not roided out like a loser? Oh, man. Ladies of Feathers. We died very young. Big head. Proud.

Especially for short guys. Proud. Like short guys. Ladies of Feathers. On Facebook. Defending Rittenhouse. Big head. Proud.

Would have lifted you up. But KB, did you feel light? That was insane. Yeah. That was crazy. I thought Legends of Feathers, Civics of War was a, well, obviously I thought it was a joke. No, we were right. In middle school, we did it like all the time.

No, it was all the time. I was peeing. Did I miss my Hardee's boys? No, KB's got it. We got to do all the Hardee's. We got 200 more Hardee's to look at. 100 more Hardee's. KB's got to sing.. KB's got to sing.

He's got to sing. We also have cheesesteaks. KB, what are you singing, brother? I don't know. KB, sing Big Yellow Taxi. KB, let's do a duet. I'll do a duet. Don't it always seem to go.

Let's do Big Yellow Taxi. Shout out. Counting crows. Counting crows. A paradise in front of a parking lot. KB, me and you landslide right now. No, no, no, no. Shout out, pardon my cheese steak.

Yellow taxi. Cut down the trees. Put them in a tree. Possibly bye, bye, bye, bye and sink. If anyone wants cheese steaks, we got them. What kind? Let's do Che's abortion song. But are they the chicken cheese steak?

Are they chicken chipotle? We got everything. Oh, really? And we're doing a promo this week. If there's six touchdowns scored. We did a Friday. Wait, wait, wait. He got a promo.

If there's six touchdowns scored on Championship Sunday, I think we're giving away a free cheesesteak for anyone who buys it. Wait, so that's three touchdowns a game? Three touchdowns a game. Lightwork. I might have fucked that up. Oh, that's easy. Bro, the bird free one for everyone who buys it? might have fucked that up. Oh, that's easy. A free one for everyone who

buys it? Let me look it up. I think it's like three and a half touchdowns a game at least. The birds are scoring six on their own. Let me look it up. Yeah! A lot of bird gang in there. If you use promo code

S-I-X-T-D so six TDs between now and Sunday at 2.59 Eastern. So that's right before the kickoff. Three o'clock. You'll become eligible to redeem a free cheesesteak if there are six or more touchdown passes. Bang, bang.

Passes, passes, passes. Fine. That will happen. Six touchdown passes? That's impossible. No, it's not. Six TD passes. Both games. Both passes. Fine. That will happen. Six TD passes? That's impossible. Six TD passes? For both games. Both games.

Both. Over both. All the quarterback lines are one and a half right now. That's a great deal. So go check it out at pardonmycheesesteak.com. So that's a great deal. We all got hiccups. KB, I can't believe you said those nasty

things to me, dude. I was trying to lift your head up. What'd you say to me? What did I say to you? Were you guys really talking shit when you were at the restaurant? Yeah, we were joking. I thought it was funny. He was like, you're going to fucking die of scoliosis. Cirrhosis, you fat motherfucker.

Cirrhosis? Yeah, fuck this guy. The liver? I thought you were talking about scoliosis. Cirrhosis? I've fuck this guy. The liver? My bad. I thought you were talking about a scoliosis. Ferocious? I've never met someone on mushrooms that was still a nasty cunt. We were riffing. It was actually very funny, but. It was an off mic riff.

I thought on mushrooms you wouldn't be a nasty cunt. I thought we were riffing. I thought you called me something and then I just did a little. I said you're a bitch and I started. Yeah. And I did the back. and then I just did a little. I said you're a bitch and I started. Yeah. And I did the. You did absolutely the funniest thing possible.

So you called him a bitch. He just looked at you and he's like, you're a dicerone. No. But we were both smiling and laughing. It was.

Yeah, I didn't. I'll give him credit. It was truly very funny. Guys, I'm going to be the first. I'll be the first to say it. This is infinitely best, better than the first. Now you're talking way too much. I'm going to be the first to say it. This is infinitely better than the first one. No, you're talking way too much. Yeah, they're going to find you.

I'm going to sledge your ass. Guys, you know we're doing a word count. Did I step over my line? I step over my line. I've had a couple. Give us a joke. A couple beverages. All right, give us your new joke.

I will step over. I will fall back. Give us a joke. Or a joke. A joke your new joke. I will step over. I will fall back. Give us a joke. Or a joke. A joke or a joke. Your call. What did Frank say earlier? You want to know actually what's funny? Oh, the West Virginia man. Oh, he's got one. Oh, he's cooking. Remember when I told you that Frank is like

a diehard conservative? Here we go. Take a picture of his laptop. Nah, that's not a joke. I don't think you guys even noticed, which is the most depressing part. I took a 10-minute timeout. I didn't speak for 10 minutes. No one noticed. We noticed.

It was awesome. We all got struck. I took this picture of myself in the bathroom. Wow, that's your joke? Wait, is that your real teeth? That is my real teeth. You look like a raccoon. No, it's just a weird-

You look bad. I don't look yellow. I was like, Oh, you look like a raccoon. No, it's just a weird- Oh, you look bad. I don't look yellow. And I was like, dude, I look good. I was like, damn, I got to send this to some ladies. That's your joke? That's my joke. Your joke is you took a funny picture. No, my joke will be I'll read-

So I told you, I said Frank is a diehard conservative. Yes. I will read you what was on- Because we were looking at him and we were saying, what do you think he's looking up right now? I was wondering what he was searching. I looked at his laptop when he was talking to you. He was looking at transgender teacher at Maine Middle School shared salacious TikTok videos with sixth graders. That was the front page of his laptop.

I just clicked on a link. Yeah. And that was also, that was under the. He didn't type it in. That was under the For You page on Twitter. just clicked on a link. Yeah. And that was also, that was under the- Yeah, he didn't type it in. That was under the For You page on Twitter. Clicked on a link, bro. Are you okay? You're screenshotting my man Frank's fucking-

Yeah, that's- Guys, be honest. Be honest. And be honest with me. Did I cross the line? A little bit. I will. I will fall.

Ross Jr. Ross Jr. people. Please show the- Did you cross the line when you're looking at someone's computer screen and screenshotting it? Yeah. All right, that's on me. And you see, the worst part was I thought that was going to be funny. I will step all the way back.

Give me 20 minutes. No talking. Okay, girl, 20 minutes. That's a long time. When are we done or are we just going whenever? What time? I have a dinner reservation. Karaoke, karaoke.

I have a dinner reservation. It's his birthday. No, you don't. What the fuck? I didn't know it was going to go... Yeah, I have a 9 o'clock. You're good I have a dinner reservation. It's his birthday. No, you don't. What the fuck? I didn't know it was going to go. I have a 9 o'clock. You're good, you're good. You're leaving at 10 p.m.

No, we'll go until like 9.30. We just started an hour later than we were supposed to. Yeah, I thought we'd be good, yeah. Guys, can we do some group karaoke to warm up KB? No, it's on KB. KB has to. KB, so Shane, forgive me for prying. Did you invite Tank to a Notre Dame game?

I did. But we'll see. I had to tell Shane. I think Notre Dame, Ohio State. So, Shane invited him, and Frank goes, he looks at the schedule, and he's like, yeah, Ohio State. And I had to turn to Shane. I couldn't believe it.

Rome, that's a solid pour. I was like, when you invite Frank to things, like, thank you comes later. It doesn't come right away. He's just like, Shane was like, yeah, you want to go to a game? And he just looked at the schedule and was like, yeah, Ohio State looks good. Yeah, that's it. I thought he'd be a little more.

No, no, no. And he would do now. No, no, he's a half. He'll give you a half. Yeah, he'll give you a half, and then he'll give you a little rest later. All right. Rowan, I won't lie.

Rowan, I won't lie to you. Yesterday, I was at the office at like 7. You're still talking, dude. Yeah, he is. Hold on a minute. Oh, my bad. The other guys tell stories. It's their birthday party.

I'm back. Someone else continue. My bad. My bad. You guys have birthday parties? Yeah, it's not me. Hey, hey, hey. In the comments, take that on me.

That's not on anyone else. That's on me. That's on me. Yeah, you say that now, bro. It's going to ruin them. You're beers deep, dude. I apologize. No, I apologize.

You're three beers deep. That's on me. You're the birthday boy. What? You're the birthday boy, dude. Now you're 30. Yeah, it's a tough number, but I'm good. What kind of dinner are you going to?

Let's see what she books. Bro, you should not be going to a dinner after this. You look so creepy from the second one. I feel great. I feel fine now. I feel real good. Oh, no. She pushed it to 930. We books. Bro, you should not be going to a fucking dinner after this. You look so creepy from the second one. I feel great. I feel fine now. I feel real good. Oh, no. She pushed it to 930.

We good. Oh, great. Actually, you guys are all invited. KB, we got a reservation. KB doesn't even know. Oh, yeah. Anyone can come. We got a table.

We got a corner table at Dave and Buster's tomorrow. Oh, really? Oh, fuck. Yeah. Yeah, anyone can come. Yeah, so Maresh got that. The boy Maresh? Yeah, my Indian boy.

He's the man. Hell yes. My Indian boy. He really is as lovely as he seems. Oh, yeah. Anyone can come. Yeah, so Maresh got that. The boy Maresh? Yeah, my Indian boy. He's the man. Hell yes. My Indian boy. He really is as lovely as he seems. Oh, he is. He's as lovely and as Indian. He's the best. He's the most wonderful guy. Both.

He's great. Both? Yeah, he's got two things. I don't think you'd be both. Lovely and Indian. Yeah, I know. You don't think so, Brandon? Maybe.

Come on. You don't think you'd be lovely and Indian? I was just saying things. I thought we all were. No, we wanted to call you out on that one. Brandon's got a belly full of cupcakes. I'm feeling good. Although when y'all picked me up, Shane picked me up by the crotch. What?

Oh, I did. Y'all had hands under me and he just grabbed my pants. I want to, by the end of the night, I think we gotta pick you up. I don't think you're gonna be able to pick me up. If you got the weight distribution right, there's no reason all of us in this room couldn't pick him up. I don't think so.

I swear to God. This is in eighth grade and we're all not fucking 98 pounds. I'm telling you. You guys are fucking unity. He just had 38 cupcakes. If we had one person on the end at his feet. One person on the end. It is heels.

This is tungsten. I'm just telling you. I think we can do it. I think we can do it. I'm coming back early. I don't want to not talk anymore. I want to get you involved, dude. What were you I think we can do it. I'm coming back early. I don't want to not talk anymore. I want to get you involved, dude. What were you about to say, Sass?

I want to be involved. Jump in. You got this. What were you about to say, bro? What I have the urge to say right now, and this is just an urge. This is just like an instinct thing. And I know people don't want to hear me say this. When the Philly cheesesteaks first came out, the part in my cheesesteaks, that was all I was eating for fucking months.

That was good. I was happy with that. Yeah. It's all you can sustain on three meals a day. And I apologize. I want to give a sincere apology. If that's annoying, I apologize. I'm not trying to disrupt the conversation.

I appreciate it. I know everyone in here is funnier than me by a lot. And I don't want to disrupt that. I just want to say. The commenters will appreciate that. They will appreciate that. And I want to say, as a fan of Barstool Bites, I love them. Why did they give your panda blush?

Is it a geisha? She said, do you want a cute panda? And I said, I want the cutest panda. Alright. The craziest part of that face for him, though, is that he kept getting stronger. Right? Who? When you were eating all those cheesesteaks and you were... Oh, I was getting fatter every day.

What's the panda movie about? Did I suppose to say stronger? I apologize. Yes, I was getting stronger. And that's on me. Comments just tear me up. It's like about a bear who gets her period or some shit. It's like a Pixar type movie. I think you're thinking of Kung Fu Panda. No, that's not about a period, dude.

No, no, no. It's about the one that gets her period. No, that is the one. It's Kung Fu Panda. It's Kung Fu? She gets her period. The panda gets its period in Kung Fu Panda. I'm going to go ahead and I apologize if I'm stepping over a line.

Which you are. That doesn't happen in the movie. A period? There's no periods in the movie. It's called turning red. Turning red. That's exactly what it is. You guys want to know what's for real hurtful?

Yes. Is that painting over there, the Frank selfie? Frank. It's amazing. Is for real exactly what I look like? No, that's not her. Dude, if I took that exact selfie. There's no chance. For real, exactly what I look like. No, that's not her. Dude, if I took that exact selfie. There's no chance.

For real. That's exactly what I look like. There's no chance you have nosebleed residue on your pillow. Bro, look how soft his eyes are. Oh, no, don't get me wrong. That's a phenomenal picture. He looks good. The worst part about the picture.

What did he say, getting out of the bed? Jayden, you don't realize that when he posted that picture. So we're like, Frank, is that nosebleed on your pillow? He's like, yes. Yes. Nosebleed on my pillow. Applied, yes. Yes.

For the worst part of it. You got it. Yes. When we were making scenarios. While I was sleeping, my nose was bleeding. Wait, were we making scenarios that he was mad that he didn't get pussy? Yes. Like the girl got out of bed.

I'm back to bed. Hey, babe, wake up. Bro, I can't believe Barstool rules. I thought you guys were gay as hell. Dude, you guys have so many funny guys on here. Babe, we want breakfast over. He's the funniest guy, though. He's our top guy.

I mean, you guys, yeah. Everybody falls in line after that. That's white Beetlejuice. You don't know Mitzi. It is. He's our top guy. I mean, you guys, yeah, that's your- Everybody falls in line after that. You don't know. That's white Beetlejuice. You don't know, Mincy. You don't know. It is. No, you're right.

You're right. You guys found white Beetlejuice. We did. If you knew Mincy, you would- No, no, no. Oh, you're a mom. Hey, wait, wait, wait. He'd be your favorite.

I'll bring him back into my car. Mincy would be your favorite. Oh, he'd be your favorite. That's why he's a speed demon. Is he aware of Mincy? Guys, guys, guys. Are you at least aware of him? No, I'd be your favorite. It's Speed Demon. Is he aware of Metsy? Guys, guys, guys. Are you at least aware of him? Shane, I was trying to explain to Shane why Frank got famous.

And I was trying to explain to him the Mets-New Jersey Transit mishap. And he'd never seen it. I've never listened to you explain one thing, dude. The second you start explaining, I go. And you see the worst part about that is that's on me. All right, play the dude. I want Shane to listen. Let other guys talk.

I want Shane to listen. I respect Shane. And he doesn't. Hold on, Seth. Time out. That's about 10 minutes. All right, so opening day, 2017-ish. This video is this is

local news in New York. Okay. We pull up the point. 2017. Crazy. That's it. It's just crazy. With nowhere to go. The fallout here at New York Penn Station 10 hours.

So we find this on bars. We just block it. For NJ Transit, LIRR, and Amtrak for the rest of the day. So we find this on Barstool. We just block it. New Jersey Transit is the absolute worst! Yeah, legend. Because they are incompetent! This man heading to the Mets home opener couldn't hold back his frustration with the transit system. This is the second derailment in 10 days.

My legs feel like jello. Fortunately, Frank Lemon did make it to the game and is back home in Belleville tonight. It's the things I do as a MF fan. I commute 10 hours to get to and from Citi Field and they won the game so I guess it's worth it. Alright, so

we blog this. Then Dave's like Dave has an eye for talent. He has an incredible eye for talent He sees this Yeah Dave's like Who's this guy? Have you ever met Dave?

We find Frank Frank He's the goat Invented Wikipedia For sports He's been running a blog For 15 years Called sportsecyclopedia.com

His phone number is on there. What? People are calling him left and right. He's blogging every day. I can't get over your face, Peyton. For 15 years, Shane. 15 years, he's blogging sportsecyclopedia.com. And if you scroll to the bottom footer,

does it just have his phone number still? Well, this is also like... I want to say he sold it. It's an updated version. No, he sold it to Barstool for $10,000. Yeah, yeah. So you got to find that clip of Frank with Dave in the...

Big brain. Frank has been blogging. Dave calls him. He's like, what's your deal? He's working as a New Jersey court clerk. He's like, I go on sleep shifts. I work from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. I come home.

I take a nap. And then I wake up at like 10 p.m. And I blog till about 2 a.m. And then I go to sleep till 6 a.m. And then I wake up and I go do my job. He's been running this blog just with very little traffic. Since 99, damn near. Since 99.

Yes. Bro, since before the internet. Before the internet existed. He's the original grinder. Yes. He's the hardest worker at the company. Yes. He just grinds.

And that's what's in his brain, though. The company. When you ask him a- Swear to God. When you ask Frank a question, he'll just all of a sudden be like, oh, that was like the Boston Braves versus the Philadelphia Steagals in 1942. He'll just fucking rip it off. The Boston Braves.

That's a good pull. No, but that's what he does. He'll be like, oh, the original helmet of this team. And the Steagals. That was real. That's what he does. His frame of reference is perfect because it's everything. Insane.

So he's been grinding for 15 years, and then we finally hired him. He's just, he's an encyclopedia of knowledge. He invented Wikipedia. He created Sports East encyclopedia before Wikipedia was invented. You tell me he kept it real with Blake Griffin. Yeah. Oh. Wait, can we pull up a clip?

Can we pull up a clip? As real as real gets. Dude, he is one of the funniest clips. Can you imagine being Blake Griffin? Yeah. Dude, Frank comes in. Blake Griffin was pissed. You're the man.

Yeah. He does not. Forever. The man. Best dunking power forward ever. Probably best highly charitable of any power forward ever. My greatest dude ever, too. 20 plus points a game career.

Like, all-star games, dunk contests. Like, he is almost untouched. All-star dunking, funny, Jenner. Yeah. And then Tank comes. Look at his outfit. He's dressed like a minion, too. That's okay.

You're not the first. I said that he's not as good as he used to be. I mean, he's more obvious, right? But you're good for that team. You're good. Oh, man. What a beast. He has a goal and he fills it.

If you said, like, Blake on the Clippers 100%, what is he now? Oh, you, you cocksucker. In my mind, I said, oh, that was you. Big Cat always knows what he's doing. Wait, but like, what was Frank's answer? I forgot that part! Oh, you did that!

Yeah, I did. I did, I did. Big Cat has never made a mistake. He knows what he's doing. I forgot that punk. Wait, can we pull up? I mean, it was Frank just keeping it 100. Have you ever seen Frank eat hummus? No.

Oh, Frank eating hummus. He's a legend. He's a legend. Those aren't ridiculous. Wait, Zod, you want to see Frank eat hummus? Wait, time out. So Frank also has a show called Raw Dogging with Frank. He eats hot dogs. Raw Dogging with Frank, where he eats hot dogs.

Raw Dogging with Frank. And it's such great. And then he does soda reviews. But this was one of his. Came up with Raw Dogging with Frank. Frank, Frank, Frank. Frank is his own. I don't think he was aware his name is Frank.

Right, yeah. Watch this, watch this, watch this. This is the best. Here's the thing about frank here's the thing about frank that people don't understand this is all ridiculous so frank frank people obviously give a shit they'll be like frank like oh why are, why are you putting him on content? Frank loves Barstool. He loves being around the boys. There's nothing more than Frank loves than watching football with the guys.

I almost suspended him for a week because he was complaining all game for some random reason. I was like, Frank, I'm going to suspend you. I saw the hurt in his eyes. I was like, Frank, I'm going to suspend you. I saw the hurt in his eyes. I was like, I can't suspend him. He loves sitting down, watching football with the guys, hanging out. And his life is so much better being at Barstool. He said it a million times, how happy he is.

He's lost a lot of weight. He's dropped probably 100 pounds. He's lost 100 pounds. Really? Yeah, because he has. Because he walks to and from the office. You follow him on Twitter, he'll drop his walk slide shows. Oh, vignettes.

They're great. Dude, they are heaters. Can you get us a vignette? Can we get a Frank Frank vignette? That gay cupcake freak out in the hallway. KB, what's going on, bro? What's up? I'm chilling.

Get fired up, dude. I want to hear about you. I want to hear about your life. Dude, KB is the... No. Like, genuinely... Oh, I don't... He's a dickhead, bro.

I know. You're a funny dickhead, dude. He is so fucking clever. Thank you, man. You're my favorite comedian. Nah, that's not true. Yeah. Wait, Big Cat Nick,

I'm sorry if I'm slipping out of bounds right now. One more Frank clip that I would like to bring up is the one where he is on his way home from the Mets game, and he's complaining about the New Jersey transit, and they are chanting his name. Is that okay if I recommend that one? Don't worry, choose that lady out. Yes, and they're chanting, Frank the 10. Oh, that is a good one.

That is a good one. And I apologize. Hey, you're not stepping on any lines. You're fine. In chat, I apologize if I stepped out of bounds there, but I like that video personally. No. I like it too. My face paints something.

The fuck is that? Sorry, Shane. Did I step out of bounds there? You're good. Don't fucking bring me in here. I saw you rolling around. No, I was just. He was just looking at me.

Okay, that's my bad. Sometimes he looks at me. I'm just looking at how much I like Brandon. You get mad when he looks at me? That's me. You can't look bring me in. I saw you rolling around. No, it was just... He was just looking at me. Okay, that's my vibe. Sometimes he looks at me. I'm just looking at how much I like Brandon. You get mad when he looks at me? That's me. You can't look at me. You guys are such fucking cocksuckers, dude. You guys like me so much that the chat doesn't like me.

I don't think that's true. You understand that? You understand how that works? This entire time, I thought you were all right. You're all right. Worst part is, he is right, fully. I'm just going to try to have a good time. I stepped out of bounds again, didn't I? You'll never middle for me again, dude.

You're middle. I like your shoes. What if he opened, though? Can you open? All right, can he open? You think you could open, Sassy? The best part about KB, Shane? I apologize.

I'm going to say it as he leaves. Dumbass. Ronan and I have talked about this a lot of times. KB will keep you on your toes because you never know if he hates your guts or likes you.

There'll be days I'll show up and I'll be like, KB hates me. Oh, yeah. Like, literally hates me. You have no read on. It feels so good to hear other people say it.

Oh, no. I'm going to tell tell you For the longest time I've been like what Which actually makes me say What does KB bring He brings a lot It kills me that I come up with Wait can I say something

I've never been like I think this At the same time I think this guy hates me and laughed Harder at everything he does at the same time, at the same time, been like, I think this guy hates me and laughed harder at everything he did at the same time. Yes. I can't explain it. Dude, you guys. I think this guy hates you. You guys have never done.

You guys have never done. Yes, let someone else talk. I'm letting the bit go. You guys have never done a solo podcast with me, Roan, KB, and Nick and the entire podcast. What's solo about that? For real. Outside of the act. Outside of the act. It's opposite of solo. Dude, this, I've never been on my toes more been like dude KB fucking hate. It's the best quality.

I'm on a show with Kyle every week and he goes to me for two months. But wait but at the same time though even when you feel that like I like him so much. Oh no Kate. It's his birthday boy. Hey it's the it's the best quality KB has because he keeps you on your toes. I love all, that's a fault of mine. I love all you guys. You're so likable.

I'm a very, I have anti-social tendencies. Yeah, right. And I'm, yeah, I always, I look miserable and I'm not. Yeah. No, there's days where I'm like, oh, KB wants to fucking kill me. He hates my guts. But I know deep down... That was 2017.

Yeah, I said that. Yeah. But now I know it's like, that's just, you know, that's who he is. You gotta ride with it. He doesn't hate you. That's a problem.

I'm sorry. Maybe. No, no. It's not even like that. Who cares? Yeah, Kyle has never been funnier than he is now. Yes.

Genius. He's healthy. I will say there was a two-month stretch where I was... You hated us? No, I was Genius. He's healthy. I will say there was a two-month stretch where I was. You hated us. No, I was miserable. I was.

I thought I didn't know what my malady was. Yeah. And that just really fucked me up. Like around Christmas. On COVID, yeah. Around Christmas. I was telling. Sorry, I apologize again.

But I was telling my buddies that I was about KB. He's going to get roasted. He's going to get roasted. I appreciate it, Seth. And KB, you's going to get roasted. He's going to get roasted. I appreciate it, Sass. And KB, you know it's all love. I know it's love. I apologize. I'm sorry. He's going to get flamed. That's on me.

If I get flamed, I get flamed. I deserve it. Say what you have to say, Sassy. He forgot. I do want to know what you told your boys about KB. I know what I have to say, but I just don't want to step over my boundaries. Come on. I'm a little hesitant. I'm a little hesitant.

It's too late. You're the panda, baby. I am, aren't I? I am. Panda, panda, panda, panda. I got bras in Atlanta. I got bras in Atlanta. But say what you were going to say.

Information granted? Yeah, all of us. What I was going to say was I was telling my buddies about KB's brain malfunction. Why? That's what it is. Yeah. I was in New York and my buddies were here and they all love KB.

Last time they were here, they were like, KB and Nathan are the funniest people I've ever met in my entire life. And I was like, KB, he's got something going on with his brain. And I apologize. I apologize that this is fucking up the stream. I don't want to fuck up the stream. Of course. Of course.

Yeah, of course. And Shane, did I do something wrong? You're good. No, don't be honest. Finish. Call me out. You're going. Call me out.

Call me out if I was. Finish. You be going. All right. So that was a no from Shane. I want to get that on. This is a me and you conversation me out if I was. Finish. Keep it going. All right. So that was a no from Shane. I want to get that on a- This is a me and you conversation. You're doing great.

We saw you, and within 30 seconds, you brought up, oh, yeah, my brain's fucked up right now because I have- That's what I had to do. That was a good story. I had to just get that out of the way. I know it's a rough story, and I apologize for that once again. Will you grab that for me? Yeah, definitely. Bat throw, bat throw, bat throw. All right, my bad. Will you grab that for me? Yeah, definitely.

Bad throw, bad throw, bad throw. All right, my bad. I'll grab it for myself. Hold on. Well, let him respond to your story before... Oh, sorry, it's over. Sorry, it's over.

No, he was... He gets a chance to rebut. Oh, my bad. You met his friends? Yeah. Yeah. Well, we saw you in Chinatown on the news.

Yeah, yeah, no, yeah. That was nice, yeah. And within 30 seconds, you were like... Yeah, I have to preemptively tell him that's why I'm like, I suck at conversing right now. But you really didn't, dude. no, yeah, that was nice, yeah. And within 30 seconds, you were like, Yeah, I have to preemptively tell him that's why I'm like, I suck at conversing right now. But you really didn't, dude.

I would say, I mean, obviously, you've had a noticeable improvement after the New Year's break. Am I stepping over a boundary? No, you're good. You're good, dude. That's on me. And I apologize. I'm sorry.

You're going to fall back, right? I'm very sorry. I apologize. That's a good bit. Run that bit back. Run the bit back. Was it seeming very bit-like? It was very bitty. It was b good bit. Run that bit back. Run the bit back. Is it seeming very bit-like?

It was very bitty. It was bitty. It was bitty. Very bitty. Don't worry what people say. I'm going to go silent. Give me 10 minutes. I'll come back to myself. All right.

All right. I apologize. I'm sorry. Do you remember that time? Shane, and I want to apologize to you. All right. Give me 10 minutes, and I'll be good. It's 821. It's 821. I'll be good. All right. Give me 10 minutes and I'll be good. It's 821.

It's 821. I'll be good. All right. Cool. 831. You won't talk until 831? I did that already. You have to leave the room.

Oh, I'll be good. I'll be good. You're going to sit here until 831 and not talk. Yes, I apologize. I'm sorry. I think it's more like 832 now. No, it's 831. I'm sorry.

All right. I'm good. 10 minutes. 10 minutes. I'm good. I'm good. I'm good. I'm good. I'm good. I'm good. I'm good. I'm good. I'm good. I.31. I'm sorry. All right. I'm good. 10 minutes. 10 minutes. I'm good. I'm good. I'm good. I'm good.

I'm good. I'm good. I'm good. I'm good. I'm good. I'm good. I'm good. Wait, you're telling him he's apologizing?

That's a bad thing. What? You're the most apologizing person I've ever met in my entire life. I was walking from Penn Station the other day, and there was a pigeon walking towards me, and I kept walking until the pigeon flew away, and I said out loud, I said, ah, sorry. To the pigeon. To the pigeon. That's like how bad it is. That's bad. You're very apologetic. Yeah. kept walking to the pigeon flew away and I said out loud, I said, ah, sorry. The pigeon.

That's bad. That's bad. You're very apologetic. Yeah. Sass. Out of here. This is going to be bad. He's great,

dude. He's doing great. I love him. He's doing great. He is so, so fucking funny. Don't be mean. He's almost as funny as Nick, dude.

He's almost as funny as Nick. He's not the king. No, he's not. We see Hardee's. We do Hardee Nick. He's not the king. No, he's not. You see Hardee's? We do Hardee's. I don't think we can. Yeah, why not?

No. I said no. You said no to Hardee's? All right, so then KB's got to do his karaoke. I guess you really all do have to suck each other off now, don't you? Wait, what about Tiny Guy? Give me Tiny Guy one more time. That's fine, dude.

Those already live on the internet that's more than okay give us tiny guy one more time at least it's so funny it truly is how we is he but che you want me to say it yeah is he dead is? No. Those people are mentally challenged. No, they're not. No, they're not. Shay, do you know? No. No. You just sneaked this. As the guy who's been to meet and greets.

Oh, no. Oh, no. Is that a Carl's Jr.? No. As the guy who's been to meet and greets? Oh, no. What does that mean? What the hell does that mean?

Everybody at meet and greets is mentally challenged? Yo, what's this guy's problem? Oh, he's been to meet and greets. I saw the pictures does that mean? Everybody at meet and greet is mentally challenged? Yo, what's this guy's problem? Oh, he's been done. I saw the pictures. I mean, that's for real. Tiny guy's okay, but. All right, so we got to blur him out. No, dude.

That is just. It was a random. This isn't going around. Listen, Jay might know. Jay knows. Jay, then why isn't there anybody. Jay, you're. What a plan.

These guys are not. They're not. They're fine. They're just. They're cool ass dudes. They're cool ass dudes. That happens to be their environment. They're not. They're fine. They're just cool-ass dudes. They're cool-ass dudes. That happens to be their environment. They're cool-ass dudes.

Dude, he's so cool. He's a cool-ass dude. They're wearing the clothes from the trends in their area. The worst part is I can't find one floor with him. He's just miniature. I've been to these. I've been to these. Yo, that's a Shetland.

Okay. That's a Shetland bro. I have a question then. That's a Shetland bro. Why the fuck didn't you say something to an ass? I tried. I'm putting up my hands. I'm like, no, no, no, no, no.

I was going to stop this a long time ago. I tried. I tried. You don't have proof. All right, Quigs, make sure you blur out the pictures. No, you cannot say. Way meaner. No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

No, bro. You can't say everybody that went to the meet and greet was me. I'm not saying definitively that, but there's a high chance. Okay. Based on what? Bro, I've been to these. Yeah, based on what? You've been to them and you're not?

All right, let's do a change. Let's do a change. Okay, okay, okay. Let's figure out a change. Pivot, pivot. Pivot, let's pivot. Pivot. All right, sing some karaoke.

In a wheel. Yeah, KB, sing some karaoke. Let's figure out a change. Pivot, pivot. Pivot, let's pivot. Pivot. All right, sing some karaoke. In a wheel. Yeah, KB, sing some karaoke. He's just tiny. Spin the wheel, TJ. Spin the wheel. I'm on Google. Spin the wheel. I'm in hell.

Spin it again. The regular wheel. Spin it again. You already spun that. I don't care. I'm trying to pivot. Tiny guy's okay. Spin it.

Spin it, TJ. What was the song we were about to sing? You guys don't think dudes that go to meet and greets are fucked up? Right, no shit. Meet and greet women? That'd be like AVN Awards. You're going to say that about everybody at the fucking convention. Yeah, no, you're going to say everybody's fucked up.

That's more prejudice than saying that nobody is. There's no way. Why is being dudes? Those are the most honest of all of us. Those are honest people. I think these were just patrons of the most honest of all of us. Those are honest people. I think these were just patrons of the Carl's Jr. Thank you. Just happened to walk into the Carl's Jr.

They were already eating there. Certainly some of them are. That guy was going to go in there and get one chicken nugget. And feed his family. He lives in a tree. And makes cookies. He lives in a tree. And makes cookies. He was going to.

The Keebler elf goes to one. He's cool. He's cool as fuck. So cool. He is cool. His hands are in his pocket. The girls are touching him. Apparently. These six and a. The girls are touching him. Apparently. These six and a half foot girls are touching him.

He's abnormally tall. Those girls are big as fuck. Abnormally. Those girls are definitely like 5'7". This dude's like fucking 3'8". Perfectly proportioned. It's unbelievable. That's the thing about it.

It's unbelievable. It's a smooth 3.8. That's a smooth 3.8. The smoothest 3.8. Did you guys see the guy in the New York Post last week who was like, my girlfriend looks like

she's 12 years old. Yes. I'm not fucked up. She's 23. That is a tough. I'll be honest, I was split on that. As a parent.

I'm on his side. You can't be on his side. I'm on his side. You can't be on his I was spoiled on that. As a parent, you can't hurt her. You can't be on his side. I'm on his side. You can't be on his side because they met online. Can we see the picture? She's 23. Kate, what would you say?

This 23-year-old woman can't fuck? No, I'm saying if I was her parents, I'd be so glad. She's 23. She's stuck in such a tough spot. Oh, you're for it. Yes, but I'd be like very, but at'd at the same time be like looking at his background. He is still suspicious. Looking at his background.

He doesn't need to make a statement. Spin the wheel, TJ. Yes, spin the wheel. Do something. Spin the wheel. I'll have to change it. He met her at a Carl's Jr. Sure, man.

Spin the wheel. If you saw them, you'd be. If you saw them boarding out in the fucking Everglades, you're just out there. Great. Pissed. Pissed off. What's name wheel? We all have a wheel of our own.

This is in a future episode. You're good. You don't have to worry about that. Wait, whoa, whoa, whoa. Can we time out, though? Shane, if you did have your own wheel where you could put consequences or rewards on it for anyone, as many as you wanted, as little as you wanted, but let's say like five rewards and consequences for anyone. What would you put on it?

I don't even understand the concept. All right. He does. So like on my wheel. Why would I do a bottle of champagne? Hold on. So on my wheel, there's a slice that's champagne real pain, and you have to spin to see if you get a bottle of Cristal.

Or you have to put your hand in a rat trap. Alright, well, no. I would never be a part of this. But if it was all positive. You come up with your own. It could be like one slice. We all go get cheese steaks. Yeah, but nobody would like a

fully positive wheel. No, Che did that. Che did a wheel that was literally all of us hanging out. He's like, sushi night. Hey guys, watch this. Oh no, but it could be mean.

It could be mean too. It could be like you're dark. Spin the name wheel. Spin the name wheel. We went scorpion. Dude, that guy for his first meetup

with his girl looking around for Chris Hansen would be hilarious. He's on his toes the whole time. All right, Brandon. What do you have? I don't remember.

This was three months ago. He's got a belly full of cupcakes. It would be fun. I would like to see Shane. Let's see my wheel. I can explain them to you. Jellicle cats and jellicle cats and jellicle cats. Nachos is we just stop the show and all get nachos.

Oh, I like that. Tommy's Wild, I call my son, and he comes up with one pancake breakfast. We all have a pancake breakfast. Scattergories, we stop and play a game of Scattergories. Self-explanatory. $1,000 from Big Cat. Yep. We have a camp out in my backyard.

I don't know why I had Oregon Trail. That was before we played the bad one. Mega Wheel was we put everybody's thing on one big wheel and we'd just see. Oh, hell yeah. So that's what I got. All right. Of all the name wheels, this might be the best one. I was a little sick of the wheel at the time.

Yeah, this is a very good wheel. $1,000 from Big Cat. Come on, come on, come on, come on. Sit, sit, sit, sit, sit. No. Oh, I got a good backyard too. What is this one? Gotta camp in his backyard.

I'm camping in my backyard. Oh, let's go. I'm going to camp out in my backyard. I love it. I love it. Shane, you in? A lot of fun. Oh, yeah. You have a good backyard. I want to go to your house.

I know. This is going to be fun. I'm so excited for this. You know we're in. Yeah, we'll do that the same day we do the 12-hour stream in the same room. Oh, come on. 12-hour stream's happening. Is that my bad?

We're going to camp out in my backyard. We've got more minutes. Guys, I want to say something right now that's real. If I tell Tommy that the Yak is going to camp out in my backyard. Guys, I want to say something right now. This is real. If I tell Tommy that the Yak is going to camp out in the backyard and we don't do it. We're doing it. We're doing it. Tell him we're going to do it.

We're doing it. We're doing it. Shane, it would be pretty chill if you came. Why'd they make the rat chrome? Why does he look like he's sterling silver? Yeah, they made you chrome. Big old titties.

Huge. His wife has giant fucking cans. Oh. She's pretty sweet. Respect. Yeah, I like that. She does. Four children also, so like...

Oh, yeah, her... A little respect. Like how sweet are those titties? I'm saying respect. Oh, yeah. I'm not saying. Yeah. I want to sit on one of those titties and just be like fucking have somebody else jump on the other side, fly into a lake.

Oh, my God. No laughing, but I think that would work. It would work. Like the blob. You're calling it the blob? The blob, dude. I want to sit right by the areola on the cusp. I want to sit on the border where the color starts to change.

Don't blob his wife. I don't have KB Cannonball down. I want my legs to start. No, don't. Yeah, dude. Waving your arms. Lose all control. I want clown carnival music playing in the background.

Oh, fuck. Hey, your wife got blob tits? Oh, yeah. No, no, no. Blob titties. She's nice. She's really nice. There's Nick.

Here he goes. We got to get her next to some fresh water. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Two flips, three flips. Oh, my God. Yeah, that's... Dude, I might, like, tear a bicep. I'll get those bruises that people get.

Yeah, pop a shoulder out. Yeah. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Nick's holding the camera off. Yeah. Sash, you can come back. No, I'm back. I'm back.

He's been back. I'm just very drunk now. Let the boy talk. Yeah. I just wanted to karaoke. Sash, do a set. What are you going to sing? Do a set for us right now.

Why don't you take over karaoke for us? I'm going to pee. Yeah, give us a joke. Oh, I thought we were in songs. No, no, do a song. Do a set. I'll pee too. I'm not going to do any of joke I thought we were in songs Do a song I'll pee too You can do a song You want to do it with me?

Why didn't I leave it once? I'm thinking Rocket Man I struggle with those types of voices Three of us got it Let me see Sex and candy could be fun No no no those types of voices. Three of us got it. Let me see. Let me see. Rocketball. Sex and candy could be fun.

No, no, no, no, no. I don't fuck with that. That's too groovy. That's too gay. No, not gay, but... I smell sex. Maybe I got it. Maybe I got it.

Heart of glass could be fun. Who is that? Heart of glass. I can't do heart of glass. Once in a while, it was me. You good? Who's that casting? DV is stairs in my direction. Once in a while, it was me. Who's that casting?

Devious stairs in my direction. Devious stairs in my direction. My mother surely is a dream. The thing that people don't count, Sass' singing voice is A1, bro. Sass is a good singing voice. He's a good ass. You know I'll do Rocket Man, Piano Man, Tiny Dancer. Tiny Dancer could be fun.

I can't do that. Tiny Dancer? If anyone wants Tiny Dancer, it's Tiny Dancer. Let's go Tiny Dancer. Yeah, yeah. Hey, Les, let's get it. Let's go Tiny Dancer karaoke. Sorry, Uncle Don.

All four of us. Tiny Dancer is fun. Can we help you? Yeah, of course. Of course. Of course. I remember my dad coming home from when the Red Sox won the World Series. Of course, yeah.

And he was blaring Tiny Dancer in our house, and my mom almost divorced him. It was like four in the morning. This man is a libs. Screaming Tiny Dancer. Count the headlights on the highway. It was a beautiful moment in my life. We're still together. Can we get the lyrics on the screen? It's coming up.

Come on. Oh, I love this. Blue jean baby. L.A. lady. Blue jean baby LA lady Seems just for the bad Come on, Jay. Talk to him, Jay. Feels like since... We know you got up.

Pretty eyes Hey, hop on. Pirate smile You marry a music man My ass was soaked in the bathroom Why? Ballerina You must have seen her

Dancing in the sand There is Shay Come on Shay Talk to these motherfuckers Now she's with me Always with me Always with me Time to dance in my head He's singing in Bob Dylan's voice.

He's fucking killing it. He really is. This is sped up for sure. I can tell. No, but it's like an 86 instead of an 80. Jesus frees Out in the street Handing tickets

South for God Cue up the way by Fastball for Brandon Turning back She just laughs The boulevard is not that bad The end of May The boulevard is not that bad. Come on, Zia.

My voice is falling out. The animal man. He makes a stand. Where does he make the stand? In the auditorium. I'll get down. Bring it down. I'll say it.

I'm so fucked up my face. Looking up. She sings her songs. The words she knows, the tunes she hums. Come on, Brandon. Here we go. You don't know these Yankee-ass lyrics? I think I'm going to need my voice to fall back.

Know how it feels so real. A land here, no one here. Only you. My head was completely blended with the screen behind me. Only you can hear me. When I say softly. What an evil laugh. Slowly.

I can't tie my shoes. Hold me closer, time to dance. Count the headlights on the highway. Lay me down in sheets of linen. There it is. Come on, Sass. You had a busy day today. Hold me closer, tiny dancer. Count the headlights on the highway.

Big random walkers in hell. Lay me down in sheets of linen. Now we all need to get in. Come on. You had a busy day today That's a nice break. Tiny Dancer. Big change.

Tiny Dancer. No, you didn't just gritty. You just hit a light gritty. All right. Everyone sit down. Blue jean baby. LA lady. Seamstress for the band.

Pretty eyes Pirate smile Oh, Che, you got it. Oh, he's been feeling it. You're marrying a music man. Let Che go solo here for a second. Solo, Che, solo. Solo, Che, solo, Che.

Ballerina You must have seen her Solo, Che. Solo, Che. Dancing in the sand. Yeah. Come back in. Give me a solo.

Give me a solo. And now she's with me. You got a sass? Oh, you want a solo? Always with me. Yo, give me a solo. In my hair. Here it comes.

Here it comes. On everyone. Everybody now. Everybody now. It's a breakdown. That's it. Here it comes. On everyone. Everybody now. Everybody now. It's a breakdown. That's it. I think that's a breakdown. I said everybody now for the instrumental.

Oh, I feel so real. Lying here with no one near. Only you. And you can hear me when I say softly slowly slowly Hold me closer, tiny dancer This went so much better.

Lights on the highway You went slow? I'll be honest, I think it was Will Compton. We got a Zoom. Zoom Will. TJ, give me a Zoom link for Will. Have a dance today.

Dude, it was Will, dude. Call me closer, time to dance. We all thought he was good vibes. He was insidious. Count the headlights on the highway. That's real, dude. Lay me down in sheets of linen. Why is he so quiet?

Chase is rocking. You had a busy day today. I do love to see my man Steven rocking. You guys are boys now. Boys, boys, boys. You guys are pure boys. When I saw his hulking body. Yeah.

Yeah, yeah. We had a show where he did, how many pounds did he lift that day? 10,000. 20,000. 20,000 pounds. Bench press. And other stuff. That was super impressive.

It was BP. I want you to keep it going. Jay's tall, dude. I was measuring up. I didn't know it was my height. Especially for Asians. The least favorite part about the show is you guys are all 6'3". Kyle, that's your favorite part about the show.

The least favorite. You guys are all 6'3", but you don't seem like you would be. Nah, but you're a wrestler, dude. You would literally kill everybody. Kill. Facts. Ask Chase his 40 time. What's your 40 yard dash?

Right now? Or peak? Peak. Peak? I did at one time run a 4-4-0. Unofficial hand time, two-point stance. Jay! Yeah, this is where it is.

All that progress. Yeah, no, it's over. It's just a fact. 2008. 2008. Jay claims he had first-round wide receiver speed. 6-3. It's just a fact. First-round wide receiver speed. 6'3", ran a 4-4.

It's just a fact. First-round wide receiver speed. 2008. He's Justin Jefferson. They all want me to not believe you. Dude, I believe you. Summer, summer 2008, I was at Jets Fest. I'm not a Jets fan, but I went to Hofstra University. They had just traded for Brett Favre.

It was like a meet and greet. My dad worked in Long Island at the time. Two-hour commute. I was like, hey, can you drive me up to school? I'd love to see Brett Favre, one of the greatest quarterbacks of all time. Also should be in jail. Why? What'd he do?

What'd he do? Also should be in jail. This was before that. So I went to the school. I'm in the parking lot. They have what's called Jets Fest. So it's a bunch of like, you know, throwing a ball to an inflatable in a hole or whatever, et cetera. Then you bust out a four.

One of the events is a 40-yard dash. It's in a Hofstra parking lot. If anyone's ever been there, concrete lot. They roll out the turf. Just explain the parking lot. I'm being specific. I'm being as specific as I can. Jay, that's a trait of a liar.

They always build up with oddly specific details. You can believe whatever you want. I'm telling you the truth. Jay, I believe you. They roll out this 40. There is, at one end, an intern who's taking a stopwatch at the end, and he says, go. And you run as fast as you can until the end, and he hand times it. Now, there's nobody being like, you have to be in a three-point stance,

whatever, false starts, whatever. I run it three times. The first time I run it, 4-4-7. And I was like, holy shit, I'm really fast first time I run it, 4-4-7. I was like, holy shit. I'm really fast. I run again, 4-4-3. The last time, I take my keys off my neck.

I'm wearing a keychain. I'm wearing a keychain. I'm wearing a keychain. It's a... I take my keys off my neck. I run a 4-4-0. Somebody at the time, the Jets had very bad wide receivers. Somebody, not me, not my buddy, swear to God,

not my buddy who was there with me, yelled to the Jets practice field and said, yo, get somebody over here. No, no. Swear to God. He saw it and then get somebody over here. Swear to God. Wide receiver speed.

The intern timed it. I was in a two-point stance. I was not in a three-point stance. Chase, did you ever think the intern was gassing you up and just timing you friendly? No, no. I ran it three times, bro. No chance. Chase.

No, he couldn't have done it three times? Somebody yelled for the Jets. No, no. It's because my friend ran it and didn't run good times. All right. Then what happened when he summoned the guy? Nobody ever came over. Justin Kumpf.

It was their training camp. You could have been drafted. Can we find one? Probably not. I could have been a UDFA. Probably not. He said probably not. You could have been an undrafted free agent.

I absolutely could have been a UDFA. You could not have been an undrafted free agent? I absolutely could have been a UDFA. UDFA, like Pallet. Who could not have been an undrafted free agent? You can't walk off the street and be an undrafted free agent. Bro, yes, you can. Like Vince Pallet. If you have measurables like I do, 6'3", 4'4", 185. I can't believe this guy.

Why would I ever have a dispute with this guy? If you had known that off the rip. Facts on facts. Dude, I swear on my life. You have never said this. You could have been an undrafted free agent. Dude, if somebody actually came over, I probably would have been in the NFL for a year. All right.

Jay. Hold on. No way. Okay. You got to stop. I mean, practice squad, if I'm being honest. If you're being honest, yeah. You're going to fight again. Jay. Jay got to stop. I mean, practice squad, if I'm being honest. If you're being honest, yeah. We're going to fight again.

Hey, Jay, Jay. Practice squad. Jay, before they all shit on you, unless they want me to shit on you, I will say I believe you. Thank you, Seth. Yes, yes. Thank you, Seth. Thank you, Seth.

Unless anyone disagrees with that, then I will go with their opinion. Thank you, Seth. But for right now, I am saying I believe you. That happened confirmed, and I have a friend that texted me. You almost act surprised they didn't sign you as undrafted free agent. No, I mean, I don't expect it. I'm surprised. I mean, it's a fucking parking lot at Jets Fest.

Like, why are they going to bring a person over to like a scout? You ran a 4-4 in the Jets parking lot. Zero. Unofficial 2.6. On the black tops between the parking spaces. Dude, I have my keys on me for the 4-4. It sounds like you ran three 4-4s, though. You ran 4-4-7, 4-4-3, and 4-4-flat.

Yeah, I mean, they were mid-4-4s. All right, but I will say, when you were running 4-4-7 and 4-4-3, I was going to say, I hope you didn't have your keys on you because that would have fucked you up. And I'm glad you took them off for the third try. You didn't check that Zoom. The thing is, though, we did wind up timing it, didn't we? Yeah.

Yo, you're talking like 13 years later? Yeah, dude, I'm fatter. What was it? I'm way less athletic. Was it a six flat? Che, you are not fat. There he is. I'm not fat, but I'm fatter.

No way. Willie. Is him right here? Will, you just missed the story of Che saying that he could have been an undrafted free agent. No. I mean, you're not the same, bro? Will.

Yeah. Is that real? Hang on. First, before we do that, is that real? Yes. Definitely. They draft measurables, not production, bro. The hell are you telling the shot? Yeah, your wife? Don't tell that goddamn dog to shut up. I gotta hit my dog real quick. No.

No. You're right. He dog real quick. No. No. God damn. You're right. He was the guy. He shows up. Yeah. Will. Tell me about Cheyette. Tell me about it for real.

He ran a 4-4 at Jets camp. Unofficial two-point stance. That's fast. Unofficial two-point stance in 2008. Correct. Will, are you eating a sirloin right now? Oh, that's a filet. Yeah.

He said if a scout. It's a Wagyu in New York. He said if a scout had shown up and seen his measurables. No way. Undrafted free agent. On the spot. For sure. Will, ask me who won.

Who won? Who won the gays race? You won. You won the game of life. That was good sass. Sass. You won. You won the game of life. That was good, Sass. Sass, you promised not to get inspired. The longer this goes, Sass is actually the only one that is

going to take him out. That was hilarious. I'm going to take 10 more minutes. Will actually was the cancer in the last one. You remember when Will was here the cancer in the last one. Yeah, he was. You remember when Will was here? Yeah, he ruined it.

The time is it. It's 8.50. Why was I the cancer? It's 8.50. I'm going to come back at night. Last time we were fucking fighting and everything. Today we've been getting along. You left.

Everybody had a good time. Me and Steve. Dude, Steve ran a 4.3 in the Jets parking lot. 4.4. I agree. 4.4. It was probably a 4.3, the Jets parking lot. 4-4. I agree. 4-4. It was probably a 4-3, though, if you had laser timed it. Steven Chay, there's no way that you ran a 4-4 on a two-point stance.

There's zero truth to that. Bro, I swear on my life I ran that. Again, two-point stance, unofficial, hand-timed, not laser time, but okay, fine. Fucking throw on, what, two tens of a second? I'm a monster. 4-4-2 at worst. Will, talk to him, Will. Will, talk to him, Will.

Steven, this is legit. You should still be able to run under a five tomorrow. I want to shoot it right now. Dude, I posted that pic of me flexing that we kind of tricked Connors taking. The speed trainer from when I did that was like, dude, you could probably run under a five right now. I've seen your upper body. The speed trainer

said that you could be sitting on Steven. You want to try it right now? I know Steve. Not right now, bro. Steve, I know what you think. Steven Lim. Look. Where's Will? I know Steve. Not right now, bro. Steve, I know what you think. I'm comfortable. Steve and Will. Look, where's Will? Will was the negative experience in this whole thing.

Yeah, he was. Will, you have no idea how good the vibes have been right now. Once he took off his pants and showed his little cock, it ruined everything. Oh, no. It was nice. You had a nice cock. It was one of the smaller dicks. That's not what we're about here. It was everything. Oh, no. It was nice. You had a nice cock. It was one of the smaller dicks. That's not what we're about here.

It was good. It was a cocktail weenie in a good way. Bill, I thought you were fucking hung. I saw that dick and I said, wow, that's a big dick. Everyone's different. In their own way. Kate, what did you think about Will's penis? I didn't look at it. I didn't look. I wasn't penis? I didn't look at it.

I didn't look. I wasn't here. I didn't look. This is messed up. You've seen it on the internet. You've seen the photos. You've seen the photos. Excuse me.

Will, I spent some time with Taylor, but you're still my guy. Right. I'm my number one guy. Yeah. I appreciate that, brother. Look, I feel like it's happening again. Big Cat, he brings me on these things, and then it's just like a – Who does?

It's like the guns are pointing everywhere. You know what I mean? Like Shane. Who are you blaming, though? Shane. I'm right. What are you talking about? You're blaming Shane.

Yeah, you're right. Shane. Oh, no. Unless people are watching, Shane's a fucking goat. I respect the – Will, how's the back? The back's feeling a lot better. Good.

Good. What'd you do to make it better? I mean, I don't want to bore you with... No, be real. Be real. Appreciate it. How'd you get it? Carrying a podcast?

I mean, you can't throw shots at the boy who's not present. No, I'm just trying to create divisiveness. No, he's just trying to tailor the compliments to your liking. Will, give us what you put in your body. I thought it was funny. It was hilarious. My bad, everybody. Yeah, no, you're good.

I didn't know Will was going to be such a fucking bummer. He's kind of being a bummer. I didn't know you were going to be a jerk towards me. He's making a device of him. Hey, hey, hey. You can't say that joke after the first thing you said to me. Hey, Will, you're the reason we were all divided last time. Now we're all vibing.

Dude, I can't believe you're this divisive. Chan, don't listen to him. This divisive again? Chan, bring it. Chan, don't listen to him. This divisive again? Chan, bring it, bro. Don't listen to him. Will, I feel you right now. Will, the comments are going to shit on you, bro. For what?

Not being there? Yeah, maybe. There's probably a high likelihood of that happening. All you got to say is Will was supposed to show up to the case race, and fucking he was a no-show again. No, Will promised us, happening. Like all you got to say is we'll was supposed to show up to the case race and fucking, he was a no show again. Yeah. We'll promised us actually. I love you.

Well, I was, um, man, I was bummed because I, once you told me about the 26th and my wife, she's out of town. So I know I couldn't swing it,

but I was bummed. And once again, bummed. Cause she's a lady at where's your lady at? That's women. She was, she was in, uh, Portland. Where's your lady at? She was in Portland. She's flying back currently.

So you never want your girl alone in Portland. Are you kidding? Never want your girl alone in Portland. It's curtains, brother. It's curtains. She's got a new wife. She got a new wife. She met her new wife in Chaz.

Don't listen to them, Comp, bro. Fuck what they're saying, Will. Hey, Cat, from the ropes. Comp, come on, bro. Comp. Fuck what we're saying. Comp, come on, bro. I know, I know.

A new wife. She's talking about how she hurt her back also on the track. Yeah, I bet she did. Yeah, I'm sure she did. She got that back blown out. No, no. That strap on. We were all saying behind your back how symmetrical you look, bro.

You're fucking left half and your right half look crazy similar. Are you talking about my face? What's that television pillar you have? What is that? What the hell? Did you ever do the symmetry asymmetry test with your face golly well how's babysitting going it's good your boy's been i've been yeah well it's not babysitting it's called being a parent oh yes bro yeah

yeah you were the chancellor of the University of Tennessee She was like She said the same thing She was like what was it babysitting When Charles went to Portland last time And my wife stepped in and she goes Oh he was just being a dad I was like oh shit

We're up here in the suites right now Don't get us kicked out of the suites Get the fuck out of the suites Hold on She goes to Portland on the suite from the Chancellor. Yeah. Get the fuck out of the suite. You mean a dad? Hold on. Get the fuck out of the suite. Hey, hold on. You buried the lead there. She goes to Portland

on the regular? Yeah. Yeah, she's... Aye, aye, aye, aye, aye. You think Antifa flips her like a cop? Yeah. All black.

Hoodies. Antifa. You know what time Antifa's on. That was a fucking... But I miss you guys, man. Miss you, Willie. You actually were the only

bright spot of the first one, dude. And now I'm the end. That's a weird thing to say to the remote guy. Fuck you, KB. Hey, has the match already happened? Nobody's paid Fuck you, KB. Has the match already happened? Nobody's paid me more than KB, dude.

Yeah, I don't even know who won, to be honest. Yeah. Surprisingly, Shane, Brandon, and Che won. Brandon ate 16 cupcakes in fucking eight minutes. I thought you were going to, and you did, you were the star of the beer, but Brandon truly, he really was

the star tonight. The best part is no one got wet. No one got wet. Is that the last, is that one wet? It must be. Yeah, it must be. That's crazy. That's unbelievable. That's brazy. How is that possible?

Excuse me for saying brazy. I'm used to that shit. Hey, Nick, who's your teammate? I have Big Cat and Sass. Second place. That's a good one. That's the squad for the tank race. No, because you had the peer pressure.

These guys weren't pressuring me into anything. I was going at my own leisure, at my own pace. We tried hard. Comp, what did you see in the tank race? I thought the tank race was a good time. It was, hey, you guys adding in the whole, you got to build the little tank. No.

I thought that was like a nice touch or hang it or whatever it was. Don't give us that bullshit, bro. You copped out. You copped out on purpose. I don't know. Don't listen to that. Whoa, whoa, Seth. What's going on right now, bro?

Right, right. Explain yourself. You sound like all of us. I'm on eight. I don't know. Don't listen to me. Whoa, whoa, Seth. What's going on right now, bro? Right, right. What's up with that kind of smoke? Explain yourself. You sound like all of us. Will, I've been looking for a little me and Will time right now. Well, I don't understand why you're throwing all this smoke at me right here. Hey, my back was fucking hurt, brother. Will, give me a real answer right now.

Was your IV fake? His IV was an n64 controller you saw the ivy what do you mean was it fake it was fake you saw it what do you mean well i got one question for you who won the game the uh tank race who won not you not hey hey will will will Not you. Not us. Hey, hey. Will, Will, Will, Will, let me speak. Let me speak. Will, Will, let him talk, man. Will, shut up. Let Sass talk. Sass, they're going to kill you, bro.

They're going to kill you. And if they do, they do. No, no, Sass, Sass, Sass. And I respect them. No, no, no, no, no, no. Sass, Sass. If me off 10 beers is annoying, I apologize. No, no, no, no, no. You don't like me in my words.

Who won? Who won? Who won what? What are you talking about? Will, who won the tank race? Not our team. Taylor's team. Will.

Will. Will. Go back to Will. You won, brother. Yeah, there we go. Oh, that's right. I won. I won the game of life.

You've already done this one. You've already won the game of life. You already did this one, sir. You know, KB, your girl's been sitting at Peter Luger's for 15 minutes. Oh, KB, run. Go, run. I'm good. She moved it to 930.

How'd you wash that off your face? How did you do that? I just did it. It was easy. Real quick. Was it? Hey, KB, happy birthday, brother. Will, thank you, man.

Willie, you going to be in Phoenix? Are you going to be in Phoenix? Yeah, I'll be out there all week. Oh, no, we're all going to be there. Look forward to it. You're in Phoenix or in Super Bowl? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Swing by the house.

Yeah. I'll swing by. Yeah. What happens if the birds... Willie, hop on the pod again. We're going to have a party, dude. You talking about anus? Yeah.

I would be honored to get on there again, brother. Let's do that. You guys better come correct, though, with the jokes. Yeah, alright. That was so fucking correct. Alright, I got you. We'll come correct. Perfectly straight. That didn't sound funny.

Yeah, all right. We've had them on before. No, they're on their show. They have people on, and they fucking mercilessly body them. They got KFC. They just invited him on a podcast, and he said, don't fucking suck when I come on. Yeah, he did say that. No, they got KFC pretty good when he came on.

Who made fun of KFC? KB and Nick. No, I hold them in high regard with their jokes. Thank you. You guys made fun of KFC? We did a roast. Before we skip jokes. Some of the roast.

We had a cut. No, no. What are the ones that got cut? No. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What are the? Something about him being on the. I'm sure we probably can't say him if they got caught from a –

Yeah, we can't say him. We could cut him now. I don't know. There was no ill will. I just – No, no. We just called – There was some ill will.

You guys seem like you guys have ill will. Yeah. Because we're super bitter because you guys are all funnier and then you guys have confidence as well. You guys are funny from West Virginia you guys have confidence as well. You guys are funny from West Virginia, which is infuriating. Everybody has a misconception about West Virginia that they

can't be funny. Everybody always says that about West Virginia. Where's Big Cat? I think he went to the bathroom. All your face paints. Did you address the first case race right when you got on? Me and Steven are teammates, Shane. All your face paints. Yeah, it will. I know. Did you address the first case race right when you got on? Like, right when it started?

He did. Me and Steven are teammates, brother. No, I'm just saying, like, did you just address it? Did you just speak freely on, like, you know, what energy you were bringing this time? Oh, I mean, you were the one who brought the whole first case. Yes. Damn. What's that wedding ring talking about, though, on your hand?

I know. I was going to ask that, too. How much is that worth? You know. A few bucks. Five millimeters wide? I know that's Cartier. That's because I'm Jewish, so let me know how much it is. That ring is choking the life out of that figure.

You're trying to play Gear 11, bro? Jay from the ropes! Jay from the ropes. Jay from the ropes. Do you also get Jim Croce? Yeah. Jim Crow? Let's do a Jim. Are you talking about Jim Crow?

I'm not going to do a Jim Croce song. Philadelphia. He's hung out around there, I guess. Ron, you trying to wrestle right now? Jesus. I feel like Ron's flying a plane and trying to crash it right into our... Yeah. And it's making me upset.

I want to go home. All right, I want to go home. All right, can we do one? Che, you could get one gut punch on me. Yeah? You would let Che punch you? You want to go one for one? No, no, not even one for one.

Just one gut punch. You can gut punch me. I don't want to punch you. You're No, no, not even one for one. Just one gut punch. You can gut punch me. No, no, I don't want one. I don't want to punch you. A little bit of talent. You're going to let him punch you in the stomach? One gut punch because I'm a scumbag. You're supposed to be a tomato, but you look like a wrestler.

Who is it? Looks like Kane. The red stain. Yeah. Wolfpack Singh. But for real, don't let a guy punch you in the stomach. That's how Houdini went out. Don't do it. You're right. You. That's how Houdini went out.

You're right. I would actually be very down for that if we could exchange. You got one as well. Let's not do punches. Let's not do punches. Should we do slap wheel? I want to do slap wheel. I'm down.

I would do it. I would do it. I would do it. I would do it. I would do slap wheel. Slap wheel. Slap wheel. Slap wheel. Slap wheel. Look for me. Slap wheel. Slap wheel. I would do it. I would do it. I would do it. Slap wheel. Hey, do it. Slap wheel.

Slap wheel. Let's do it. Look for me. Slap wheel. I'm down. Do it. Do it. Big cat.

Dude, we did slap wheel on the first one. It was fun as fuck. I'm not doing slaps. Slap wheel. I don't want to get hit by you. KB's going to close fist me. I don't fight, dude. I don't know if I've met anybody that hates me more than KB.

Stop saying this. I love you. No, no, no. I love you worse. Everyone he's ever met, dude. That's not my vibe. You guys, I'm closer to you than anyone else, you guys. Should we do Slap Wheel? Should we do Slap Wheel?

Wait, should we? AB, why do you hate us all? Che, pull up box number 10 on karaoke, and I'm going to sing the whole thing. Do it some helium. All right. Who would have thought the show ended? Also, Will, you're the best, dude.

You're so fucking cool. Hey, Shane, brother, I fucking hate you. Will, Will, I love you. No, no, no. Hey, Will. Ain't a time of the day. Will, Will, Will. You know it's all love. Will, you know it's all love over here, right? Boys, I got to go. Well, yeah, I love you. No, no, no. Will, Will, Will. You know it's all love.

Will, you know it's all love over here, right? Boys, I got to go. Will, yeah, I love you guys too. Happy birthday, KB. Happy, happy birthday. Will, do you want to use this time to announce? KB, KB, KB. Wait, we got to say happy birthday to KB.

Happy birthday to you. KB's going. Happy birthday Happy birthday Happy birthday Happy birthday Will would you like to use this time to make the big announcement? Come take a seat

Oh my god I'll announce it What is it? You want me to say it or you want to say it? Say it. You can say it, BC. No, no, no. BC.

No, no. He gave the direction to BC. He gave the direction to BC. BC takes it. And that's because I respect the rules. Where are you going, Dad? Will's moving to Chicago. Hey.

No way. No way. Is he actually? That wasn't what I was thinking. That wasn't the... No, he is. I was thinking. That wasn't the. No, he is. I was about to say year 11 is on.

It's officially on. Oh, wait. What? No, we're on different pages. You said you're moving to Chicago. Shane, remember the first case race when you were like, hey, come, give it up. You're done. And then I was fucking back for a second for a blink. I'll be honest.

I'll be honest. I regret a lot of stuff from that. That was one of the biggest regrets. No, no. That was the one thing you shouldn't have regretted. I got a question. I was exactly right. You couldn't have been more honest with Brody.

I got a question, and it might be gay. I'm going to ask it. Oh, no. Ask it. Yes. Your homophobia is going to kill us all. Last time when we did the case race We looked up Will's salary And he said he made 9 million dollars

And then Shane said I don't recall that I don't think we asked you to talk brother And then Shane said Shane said If I do it in Shane's words I'm going to catch you Did you catch him?

What? Catch him? Shane, don't do it. Shane, don't do it. Don't do it, Shane. Why are you pocket watching? No, do it, Shane. Don't pocket watch.

Cut that whole thing. Cut that whole thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Don't worry about another man's money. Yeah. Let that boy sit in what he just said. No, I did not catch that. What are you, nuts?

That's a professional athlete, dude. That's Will Compton. Dude, all professional athletes are. Hey, I got a question. All professional athletes are 100 millionaires. That's a fact. Play one day in the NFL. You want me to kill myself?

We need to exterminate. That got dark. I can't believe you're the loser of this whole thing. It was a shock. Everybody was having a nice time. We're having a great time. Who was surprised by me being the loser? All right, never mind. It's not a surprise at all. Seth, take it easy, fuck jesus but bro you know

that will loves you sass i do love sass i don't like you've been like the biggest fan of yours since your inception at barstool the first time you went out everybody loves you bro yeah well see the thing is i was gonna say you can catch these hands but what i'm gonna say is i'm gonna say i respect the hell out of you brother i respect I respect you. And Ronan's right. When Ronan came on, I was like, I was just asking, yo, let's get sass on. He's like, what's up with sass? He was literally loving on you.

Well, let's not forget what he said was fun, that he said Will could catch these hands. That is very funny. Did I say that? I can't believe you blended. What happened, Nick? I tried to wash it off. What?

It just made me green. I tried so hard to wash it off. Look at your hair. Yeah. You don't stay with Ukraine anymore? No, you're Shrek now. It was a losing battle. Guys, let's talk money.

I tried to wash it off. I've never seen a more vibrant blue than the way your hair meets. It made me bluer. Nick, you... I was trying to say something to you, Seth. Oh, the vape? Jesus Christ.

Seth, let it ride, dude. I know. I suck. I'm a terrible person. No, you're not. No, you're not, dude. We love you. No one hates me. Oh, did KB go to dinner? I hit the point. I suck. I'm a terrible person. No, you're not. No, you're not, dude. We love you. 9-11.

Everyone hates me. Oh, did KB go to dinner? I hit the point. I can feel it here how annoying I'm being. I just, I. No, KB. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. All right, I'm going to say, Shane, how are the boys?

How are the boys? Yeah. The whole squad's holding up pretty good. My man Sass is. Oh, don't kid me. Oh, no. Unless you want to. Gaston fell apart here recently.

Dude, oh shit. My beard just fell. Grab another. Everything went very well, dude. Everybody was pretty... So we promised we were going to try to get a million comments on this video. Yeah. And you know what, Shane?

You know I respect the hell out of you. All right. So if I'm being a dick, call me out, because I want the comments. The problem is that Sass is being funny. Right. That's the problem. That's the biggest problem. Yeah, Sass.

That throws the whole plan in a loop. That doesn't do the plan any well. No. Now, honestly, if I had to blame anybody for a really poor performance, it would be Kate. Yeah. That fucking woman. Nasty motherfucker. I thought you were going to say KB, but it's Kate.

Kate, how many beers did you drink? I feel like a lot. I was wondering how many. I think it's almost 10 at this point. I suppose. 9, 13. Yeah. No, I feel like it's a lot.

Are we going to play some pool after this or what? I was going to ask What's everyone doing? We're going to society It's on me Where's Feidelberg at? Feidelberg's in Amsterdam right now Are they still alive or what?

I see Amsterdam bro Shane Shane how are the boys From the Notre Dame trip? I'm not sure what you mean. Your squad, the dude you're rolling with. Yo, Will, Shane's taking Frank to Notre Dame Ohio State. Oh, for real?

Notre Dame, yeah, in South Bend, bro. Frank today? I might have to roll up for that, too. Wait, where's Rome? Hey, we should all go. That should be a fucking event. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you know who's going to be there.

You got Penn State, West Virginia, too. You come to the new Barstool Chicago office on Friday, and then we all roll. Kickoff. Should we? Yeah, I'll get a bus. Big Cat, I have a question. We'll all go, yeah.

This might be a damper of the moods, but say hypothetically a couple of us go to Chicago. Yeah. Can might be a damper of the moods, but hypothetically, a couple of us are going to Chicago. Yeah. Can we still do the case races? Yes. You guys can come anytime you want. That's the only thing I want to know. I would hope you guys would come anytime. That was the one reason I was going. I'm out.

All right. You're not going to Chicago. Don't worry about what I'm doing or whatever I do ever. I got you, brother. My fault. I was about to say something nice about Sass about what I'm doing or whatever I do, ever. Oh, Jesus. I got you, brother. My fault. I was about to say something nice about sass, and then I'm... Don't, don't, don't, don't. Nick, what did that have anything to do with you?

What? You know I fucking love the shit out of you. No, I was going to say, I mean, Kate, I got to wait until Kate gets back. She gets down because there's, like, two commenters every fucking episode who are like, Kate sucks. Fuck that. And if anyone deserves to F-slope. Have you ever told Kate to get any of those?

No, I'm going to say it right now because Kate's back. Okay, any other comments? Comments? I know who they're about. Listen, you read comments, and there's 50 nice ones, and there's one bad one, and that ruins your day. It does. There'll be someone who'll be like, Sass sucks, or Kate sucks. Fuck them.

No one cares. All that should care is what people in the room think. That's a fact. No, no, no. That's a fact. May I interject very quickly? Yeah, go ahead, Che. Oh, no.

Is this preparing on me? No. I was defending you, Kate. If you don't have haters, you don't have fans. Yeah, all right. That's true. Dean Kyle put out a podcast today. Kyle was on fire, right?

There was no reason I did that. Kyle was the funniest he's ever been on this podcast we put out today. Look at the fucking chairs. My number is out to the public. Somebody sent me a picture of the Tony Snell graphic with my face over top of Tony. That's so insane. It broke me. You could find any piece of content you ever do, you could find someone saying it sucked.

Yeah. Anytime. That doesn't matter. It matters who you're working with and who, in the room. Jane, you got shit. Everyone's like, dude, this guy sucks. He's the worst. He's a fat piece of shit.

I'll be honest. I'll be honest. A lot of people called you a fat piece of shit. Yeah, that's true. A lot of people did. Every day piece of shit A lot of people did I did not recite that That's nice of you for being honest A lot of guys said you guys

Weren't that funny and you relied on Shock humor and like Farts Who's gonna puke and fart first I didn't recite that but yeah go ahead No but Shane you fucking deal with it For real All the time I didn't recite that, but yeah, go ahead. Yeah. No, but Shane, you fucking deal with it. For real.

Yeah. All the time. People will be like, oh, one guy will be like, he sucks. Who cares? By the way, I think that is new. What? Like, good comics never dealt with that, ever. Yeah.

Never dealt with what? Feedback? Like, they dealt with, like, Lenny Bruce would get arrested by cops. They were like, you can't say come. Yeah. Like comics didn't deal with like every time I get on the internet, someone's like, yo, for real, you suck. Yeah, right.

Right. And like 9,000 people being like, dude. I love how Will's still here. You're fat as hell, you dumb fat drunk. Right, right. But you know what? They actually like you. That's the thing. It's like, there's always one.

Shut the fuck up. No, no, there's always one. Like, you can, every, it took me a long time to realize this, because it used to bother me, but it's like, you could literally read 100 comments of people being like, I love Big Cat. He's the man. Two people would be like, fuck him.

He's the worst. And now we'll get in your head. You cannot let it get in your head. Of course. My first day of Barstool Sports, I was pulled onto the yak. I was not supposed to be in front of the camera. I got just a tweet at me just like, get this gay museum curator off. I've carried that with me every single will i did not will i can we mute will

and honestly more people more people should be like che che has never people shit on che and he he doesn't even fucking see it doesn't take damage it almost seems like he never takes it oh che is like who we actually should all look up to yeah that's true a freak he's a forever good way dude if people are commenting on you and say i would rather somebody say i whenever we do the dozen the point and the team is me you and roan yeah no people hate us i get no i specifically get booed but there is no better feeling than getting booed. Yeah. Because you're getting cheered. I would argue to disagree because there's no.

Mr. Pussy Eater says there's no better feeling than getting booed. Okay. Like you're eliciting a feeling in them That they're resentful of And I think that's an accomplishment Yeah That's fact That's fucked up That's delightful

I thought that was profound It's true He makes people feel something They don't have haters That was well said If they're apathetic That's the worst Yeah

Will you're still here Bro that is still here They don't give a fuck Disconnect Yeah Will Alright we'll see you Will We'll see you, Will. Nah, Will's still in here.

Will, show us your penis. Ron, find my vape or I'm gonna fucking freak out. Somebody find Sass's vape, for real. Well, I gave it to you in trust that it was coming back to me. You threw a knuckleball and it fucking disappeared. I can't. I'm actually, I'm rolling commando

right now or else I would. Prove it. Put on some underpants. I can't. I'm actually, I'm rolling commando right now or else I would. Prove it. Put on some underpants and take a look. Oh, fuck. I'll just make BC else in your photo. Are you wearing a Legends hoodie? Yeah. Fuck yes. The best brand. The boys. Legends, baby. It's a great brand, dude.

Dude, I know the guy. They make the best sweatshirts. Damn wrong. Best stuff. They're nice and fitting. They make you look a little more jacked than you should. Do you feel a little bad, Will, that you stole George Kittle from us or tried to? There's so many stains on this shirt.

What do you mean? You tried to steal. Hang on, hang on, hang on. What are you talking about? I'm just asking. But what do you mean by steal? I mean, he's a day one AWL. No, I didn't wipe anything off.

Oh, because he's one of the boys now? I can't lose. Oh, he's both. Of you guys. We can share him. We can share him. George has enough love in his heart for everybody. He's the best dude ever.

This is done. Yeah, well, we we're gonna say bye We're gonna do one song And then we're gonna be done Alright, I'll stay until the end Alright, okay Well, let's do a song I need to vape

Landslide Hey, Cal, let's do Landslide Landslide, landslide I mean, there's like ten conversations Will rules Kate, what are you talking about? Oh, you hated Will I think we gotta do one more song.

And then we... And then... I like legit things. Will's like the best dude I've ever met. Ever. He really is a great guy. I should be in a locker room with him. Wait till you meet Taylor LeJuan.

He's like 10... I like them both, but he's a great guy. Yeah, well, we'll see. They're both great. Oh, I didn't know you were still there. You're so great. All right, let's do landslide. Let's do landslide.

Shane, when did you listen to PMT and you realized, you know, he's the best dude ever, but he just ripped everything off from us? Oh, really? Oh, no, don't do that. And Big Hat, I will support you. It's a copycat league. You know who else ripped off? I'm just fucking with you, Will.

You know who else ripped off? Me. I don't know. He released girl dad merch A week after son of a boy dad came out That sounds like the exact opposite He hit like 10 merch bonuses But that's because the boy moves merch

You get fucked up Your Jewish side comes out He wants it all That's my bad And he never calls us anymore side comes out. He wants it all. He's bound to say it. That's my bad. And he never calls us anymore. Greedy. That's not wrong. Will is one of the funniest dudes on Twitter.

That's a fact. I apologize. He's an absolute beast. Let's do a landslide. Let's do a song and then let's lift Brandon. We gotta lift Brandon. We have to lift Brandon. We have to lift Brandon. Because I know for a fact that we can. TJ, how bad has this show been the last hour?

Bad. Where did you throw that from? It's been awesome, man. To you. No. All right. No, you didn't throw it to me. Who have it?

Will, you want to announce your move to Chicago? Oh, yeah. You know, I like to keep stuff close to the vest. I got to keep my personal best Tom Brady and Aaron Rodgers do. Brandon Wheeler said something interesting to me. What did he say? He's like, I'll be in Chicago every Monday. I was like, huh.

What's happening on Mondays? You know who's been busting with the boys? Go ahead, son. Who sucks? Will's going to be on full-time. Come on, Brady and Aaron. We offered him third chair. Am I wrong?

You going to do a live show with Brandon about college football? With Brandon? Am I wrong? Why not? He would have to offer me that. You know what I mean? I have offered you that every single time I've talked to you. Brandon, what's going on?

No, you haven't. What's your eye makeup saying? We'll be texting soon. We'll take this text. Are you guys going out after this? Yeah, we're going out, bro. It's fucking 9 p.m. With sass?

Goddamn, it's 9. You think you're not coming out? We're coming out. We're going out. We're coming out. Have a good night. Yeah. Yeah. Tonight is young out. We're going out. We're coming out. Have a good night. Yeah. Yeah.

Night is young. Me and Brandon's big ass. Look at Brandon's eyes. Look at Brandon's eyes, how they're kind of like shadowy. You know what? Brandon's got cupcake eyes right now. Yes, he does. This is a genuine question to Nick.

Yeah, hey. The shading is so perfectly done, it seems like a joke. Nope. I tried to scrub this Yeah, hey. The shading is so perfectly done, it seems like a joke. Nope. I tried to scrub this off, and it's mixed. It seems like a Hollywood artist couldn't blend. Soap works. Look how deep the blue is at his hairline. Which is good.

She used a different type of, well, she did all my hair. Hair looks awesome. No, it dipped in the blue. She put blue into the. Hair looks awesome. It dipped in. She put blue into the whole base. Right. She really did. That's why she's the best. She works for the Rangers.

She's an opera singer. She grew up and she was in hair. She was in hair in South America, she said, which is like a play where you're ass naked. Shout out Melissa. Great job by her. I mean, she's awesome. She really did a good job. All right, let's like a play where you're ass naked. Shout out Melissa. Well, great job by her. I mean, she's awesome. She really did a good job. Alright, let's do a little karaoke. Let's do some karaoke.

What do you guys want to sing? Let's get to that singing, bro. I honestly think we do Piano Man. I think we do Piano Man. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Rocket Man? How about Night Ranger? You know that one? I don't know it.

Sing Stacey's Mom. Oh, that one. Stacey's Mom. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's what it is. You know what I mean? That's gross. I think we do Sex and Candy.

I thought we were doing Stacey's Mom. I think Stacey's Mom is good, and that's a good candy. Stacey's Playground, isn't that it? Stacey's Playground. But who does... I like Sex and... It's a Crash Test Dummies. Crash Test Dummies, Dumb and Dumber, the movie.

Let's do Sex and Candy. As opposed to what other Dumb and Dumber? But wait, Brandon, what song does Duncan Sheik sing? Barely Breathing. I am barely breathing. Brandon, you like Sex and Candy. I do. Let's do Sex and Candy for another day. All right, now, what are you doing with Sex and candy. I do. We're both of them. For another day.

All right, now, what are you doing with sex and candy? I thought we were doing... Come on. What's going on? Brandon likes sex and, like, 58 Butterfingers. I don't know... I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. bars. You know sexy candy all the way. Brandon likes thinking about sex and having candy. I like sex and...

Let's do Sass. Let's let Sass do Bob Dylan Hurricane Solo. Okay. I'll do it. Stacy's mom. Welcome to the Bob Dylan... Are you gonna actually stand up here and sing or are we just fucking... I'm gonna stand up and sing.

You fucking asshole. Oh. Stacy's mom has got it going on. Casey's mom has got it going on. Rest in peace to the lead singer, COVID. Casey's mom

has got it going on. Casey's mom has got it going on. Boys are from Hackensack. Casey's mom has got it going on. Casey cannot Boys are from Hackensack. Both. Hang by the pool Did your mom get back From her business trip On the yak drinking beer She's a hot mom

Is she there Or is she trying to give me the slip You know I'm not the little boy That I used to be I'm all grown up now, baby. Can't you see? Stacey's mom has got it going on. It's all I want.

I love you so. Stacey, can't you see? Hey. The girl for me. I know I'm wrong. That's what's up. Stacey's mom has got it going on. That's what's going on. That's his mom. Has got it going on. I fucking know.

His mom has got it going on. I can tell. Stacy, do you remember when I mowed your lawn? Read it. I mowed your lawn. Your mom came out with a towel on. I could tell. I could tell. I could tell.

I could tell she liked me by the way she stared. The way she stared. And the way she said, you missed a spot over there. A spot over there. Sassy's just a bitch. Yeah, you know. Sassy, what song you want?

Let him hit it. Let him hit the chorus. I can't read it. I can't read it. Play me Piano Man by... Oh, not Piano Man. All right, all right. Just get it nice enough for me.

I would rather die. Dude, let's do closing time. No, no, no. Closing time works. No, no, no. I mean, box number 10. A gym. Nobody knows what that is.

Who's going to want to close in time, then we'll lift Brandon, and then we'll get out of here. All right, giveimme box number 10. Just ask me. I know you want to hear it, but who wants to hear that? I do. Nobody else. All right, guys.

Let's get this man spinning. Box number 10. Hashtag number 10. All right, here's what we're going to do. Hey, are you talking to someone? Hey, she you talking to someone? Are you? Hey, she hasn't been. What are you doing? I don't know.

She hasn't been. She might be rattling off words. A woman's voice in her eye. She might be rattling off. Guys, this is what we need to do. Everyone in the room ignored it. That's our teammate. That's KB.

Thank you, because it was a long monologue about killing myself. He wouldn't shut the fuck up. All right. Give me box number two. All right. Here's what we're going to do. Here's what we're going to do. Thank you.

Everyone stop. Wait, Kate, I didn't hear you, but don't. Here's what we're going to do. Here's what we're going to do. My head right on the tracks. Right on the fucking tracks. Sass is going to do box number 10 by himself. Okay.

While we lift Brandon. And then we're going to do closing time and we're going to end it. Alright. Spider! We're going to need your help. We need hands. Will, you're the best. We have to lift him. You're the best of us. You're the best of us, Will.

He's the best among us. Brandon, you have to be... Will is the best of us. Will's number two. Brandon, you have to be. No, no, no. Will is the best of us, bro. No, Will's number one. Roan's two, bro. Comp. I can't believe Will Compton's the GOAT, dude. Yeah, honestly, it makes me wonder how many other dudes in NFL

are the GOAT. All right, someone put up box number 10. He's literally the only GOAT. Yeah, you might only be the one. Will Allen Southern. The one and only. Coming down on country, boy. While Sass is doing that, we all have to have one more drink.

And also, I'm confused. Where the fuck is my vape, Roan? You threw it. I need my fucking vape. You threw it. It disappeared. I threw it to you and you lost it. Can I say, I mean, I...

Box number 10. Put it on. I feel like Roan has it. I'm ready. Do they have operation? Roan you and you lost it. Can I say, I mean, I... Put it on. I feel like Roan has it. They have Operation. Roan, you have it. They have Operation by Jim J. I know Roan. In my heart of hearts, I know Roan has it.

I know. You think I'm hiding it, though? Yes, I do. I think you're that guy. No. I would love. No. I think you're hiding it.

Maybe you're our teammates. I know, and I think you're hiding it. I didn't find it. That's how old this fucking song is. Hey, flame me for being mean to Nick. She flamed me for having this vape. Think you have his vape? No, he sassed through the vape.

It was a bad throw. He's over there in the cabinetry. Sass. All right, go ahead, Sass. What song are we doing? What song are we doing? Are you kidding me? Is box number 10 up?

No, operation. Operation. Operation, okay. What the fuck is this? Wait you kidding me? You're doing box number 10 by yourself. Is box number 10 up? No. Operation. Operation. Operation. Okay. What the fuck is this? Wait, whoa, what is this? This is a fucking classic.

Oh, Operator. Operator. Okay, okay, okay, okay. I get it now. Here we go. I can't see the fucking word. I can't see it. You guys gotta move. You guys gotta move!

I can't see the fucking words. Move! Move! I can see it now. Operator, could you help me make this call? See the number on the matchbook is old and faded. She's living in L.A. with her ex-old best friend, Gray. A guy that she knew well and sometimes hated. But isn't that the way this goes? Look at what Jadis did. Cameras, please, hurry up.

Look at this horrendous shit that Jadis did. Wait, on the cooler. On the cooler. He crushed a whole yak. He crushed a zombie on top of the yak cooler. Why is it focused on Will? Oh, that's Will. Can anyone focus on what just happened right here?

Oh, no, no. I can't see the fucking tricks. What the fuck? Really? Operator. I got it in place. Won't you help me make this call? Well, I can't read the number.

On the matchbook that you gave me. I know. There's something in my eyes. I can't remember the matchbook that you gave me. Something in my eyes. You see, it happens every time. Think about the love I thought would save me. But isn't that the way they say it goes? Well, let me forget all that And give me the number if you can find it So I call and tell them I'm fine

And to show I've overcome the blow I've learned to take it well Only wish my words could just convince themselves that it just wasn't real. That's good. Alright, here we go. Oh, God, look at Will. Oh, he's fucking naked

the whole time. Oh, yeah. Naked the whole time. Here we go. Closing time Open all the doors And let you out Into the world

Closing time Turn off all the lights On over every boy And every girl We did it Closing time One last call for alcohol Every boy and every girl. We did it. Closing time. One last call for alcohol. So finish your whiskey or beer.

Closing time. You don't have to go home, but you't stay here. I know who I want to take me home. I know who I want to take me home. Take me. I know who I want to take me home. Take me home. Got a waffle. Closing time.

Time for you to go out to the places that you will be from. Yes, you blew it. Closing time. This room won't be open till your brothers or your sisters come. So gather up your jackets and move out to the exits. I hope you have found a friend. First thing ever. Shoot it up.

Shoot it up. That worked. That worked. Closing time. Every new beginning comes from a mother. Beginnings end. Yeah. I know who I want to take me home.

I know who I want to take me home. I know who I want to take me home. Take me home. That was a instrumental break. Spider, bro. Why are you the goat, Spider? Liam, why are you so well-rounded? Where do we begin?

Not quite. Here we go. Not the Gillis and Jay friendship that no one ever thought would happen. I swore. With me. Closing time. Time for you to go out

to the places you will be from. Here we go. I know who I want to take me home. I know who I want to take me home. I know who I want to take me home

I know who I want to take me home take me home take me home closing time every new beginning comes from some other

beginning instead. Closing time. Half cup good. I'm afraid Walker ate 30 cupcakes. He's like William Wallace. He ate 120 cupcakes. I just went to my desk and I ate the leftover chicken nuggets. Oh, Brad.

Yeah, they were eating them. Fuck yes. Shane Gillis, likable. Yes. Wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. MVP. We get like a myth buzzer. Myth buzzer.

Of likable. Bam. On the bright side, I will say. No, stop, Seth. We're talking about Shane. I don't want to see y'all wet. All right. Shane Gillis.

Thank you. Redemption achieved. A great case race. Another win. I've always liked all you guys. I was always just, you guys came in nasty towards me. I couldn't believe it. I got to hear you guys were talking about nasty.

It was KB, honestly. We were nasty boys. And that's why he left, honestly. It was KB. I was trying to have a nice day. Once again, you prove that you're likable. We proved that we drink beers. And you guys proved that you're the victors of this entire thing.

Steven Che, Brandon Walker, Shane Gillis. Yep, champions. There'd be a better trio. I don't think there's no better trio. That might be the best trio possible. No better trio. Big three. Big three.

Big three. Big three. Big three. Big three. Big three. All right, everyone, please like and subscribe the video. Subscribe to the Yak. We'll see you on Monday. Hope you enjoy. You all right, Nick?

Yeah, helium. We'll see everyone on Monday. That's the Yak. Peace. Love you, boys. Love you, Will. Yeah. See everyone on Monday. That's the act. Peace. Love you, boys. Love you, Will. Yeah. Peace. love you guys.

Thanks for rocking with us. Have a good weekend. Mon damn, have a good weekend. Make sure you like, share, and if you ain't subscribed, I don't know what the fuck you're doing. Subscribe right now. Big up to you.